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Available opinion The aspirations of many parents result in undue pressure on their children to perform for success, not skill

By Tanveer Ahmed

While some of us might pity Mrs Dhaliwal, the reality is that many people from the local South Asian community would share her views, particularly about extracurricular activities being a distraction.

remember as a child, watching a family friend who bought their only daughter medically related toys from an early age. For example, the mother would buy a plastic stethoscope for the child’s fourth birthday or the game Operation for her seventh. All of it was strategically aimed to help their one and only daughter to ultimately become a doctor, an aspiration many South Asian parents hold for their children. There was little question that the mother was a loving parent who only wanted the best for her child and ultimately, she was successful. Her daughter did become a doctor. But it raisedIn reality, this is a misunderstanding. In the past few decades, a great deal of brain research has shown that we actually use more of our brain in navigating complex social tasks, than in technical ones. The vast areas of our brain that we are yet to understand are most likely to be complex apparatus to help us deal with the complexity of human social interactions.

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I have a firm view that we underrate this in our culture to our detriment. A twelve-yearold child will use more of their brain at a sleepover, or school camp, than in any mathematics examination.

In today’s world, technical knowledge is of much lower priority than it once was, for the knowledge is accessible to all. What are highly prized are the soft skills of communicating, collaborating and mobilising

whether we are flexible enough to promote a wider variety of careers for our children.

Amy Chua is a Princeton academic who attracted headlines worldwide several years ago for suggesting that white, Anglo parents were just too soft on their children. She openly spoke of how her children were studying many extra hours on top of their

A key suggestion she makes is that the message within Western circles is that children are ultimately quite fragile, whereas Asian or Indian culture teaches that children

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