The fight for right

BY RANI JHALA

My dear Granddaughter, I saw your article in the papers and am pleased that the Women’s Reservation Bill is being passed. It is not a gift to women. It is a right!

I know what I write will come as a shock to you. You always said I was an epitome of Indian womanhood. Silent, tolerant, accepting and dutiful! These are good qualities to have but they also weaken us and prepare us for a life of servitude - to our family, our relations, our friends and most of all, to men. And the very moment when men decide to take control, we move from being ‘protected’ to being ‘abused’. The only line that separates these two situations is empowerment. No I don’t mean the power that comes from ridiculing your in-laws or ill-treating your parents. I mean the freedom that comes when people understand that you are a person in your own right, with your own privileges and identity.

From the dawn of history women have had to fight for everything. The right to an education, the right to vote, the right to keep her children, the right to prayer and to represent her religion, the right to be elected and the right to speak for her fellow-sisters. None of these rights were freely given to her. They were earned. They were fought for. They were won.

Whether the Bill will give women an equal say in the nation’s future and empower us to be able to control our own fate is yet to be seen. I believe that this main battle will have to be fought for, on a different platform. The platform of social awareness! And it will have to be done by women themselves, for no man will do that for her. As hard as it will be to fight in the male domain, the weakest link in this fight will be those women who, like my daughter-in-law, will hinder women’s progress for their own selfish needs.

You must now be questioning my sanity, my bitterness… In those first days after your grandfather’s death I was tired from having cared for him through his illness. I was exhausted from having to make all the decisions, and I was truly glad that I had a son who would see to my safety and well being. As you know, after the last rites were over I went to live with your uncle and his family. The first months flew quickly.

Everything was looked after for me and I was glad for the opportunity to rest and forget the difficult months that had gone by.

Your uncle said he would look after the financial transactions for me and I let him do this. I signed the papers he brought and he looked after the details. He assured me that he was securing my future and also transferring your mother’s share left to her by your grandfather.

Unknown to me, all that was mine was being slowly transferred to his family and my maternal love did not see what was coming. Six months after I became a widow, I had become practically penniless. Everything had been signed over to their names. My own son, a party to every act! So well planned was the treachery that to prevent me from regaining my property, instead of it being put into my son’s name, my daughter-inlaw got everything signed to her own. grandchild, you can do this for me. For us women! Just having a representation is not enough, tell women they must unify, and must ensure that the laws of this land are amended so that a woman’s assets cannot be taken away by anyone as long as she is alive. Only after her death, can it be given to her husband and children. Yes there is the risk that she could be murdered for it, but those who are so inclined will do that anyway, once their aim has been achieved.

My name in shred, my loyalty questioned, my future desperate, I became what many women before me had been turned into. Helpless! Had your mother not been there, I would have been a destitute in the streets. They had locked up half the house. My house! They had dismissed most of the employees. My employees! And they withheld from me everything that was mine, including my finances.

And who did this?

My son! My grandson!

Two generations of men bearing my blood!

The court chose to ignore my evidence and disregard your grandfather’s will. They said I willingly signed over my assets, that I should have protected my own property, not expected others to do it. Others? This other, was my own, once ‘beloved’ son. And my faith was totally shattered when I saw the names of the people who had acted as witnesses for them or aided them - an uncle, a brother, two nephews, an army officer, an advocate, a notary and two of my daughter-in-law’s brothers. All men, who by the nature of their profession and position in society should have defended women, should have protected me. Yet most went on to perjure themselves in a court of law.

You have taken the first step with your article. Take the next and fight for our rights. Wake the world up to the plight of women - the widow, the unmarried sister, the childless wife. I know I am putting a heavy burden on you, but your article has given me hope again. Tell my story to the world, so they know that even in the 21st century, what struggle it is to be a woman!

With my love and blessings. Your everloving Grandmother

Main street location, south-west Sydney, 70 seats plus, established 9 yrs, same owner. Professionally set up, loyal customer base, not a cent to spend.