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JOURNAL VOLUME 002

SPRING/SUMMER 2019

Defying Fear and L

Lies “B

e careful that you never allow your hearts to grow cold. Remain passionate and free from anxiety and the worries of this life. Then you will not be caught off guard by what happens. Don’t let Me come and find you drunk or careless in living like everyone else. For that day will come as a shocking surprise to all, like a downpour that drenches everyone, catching many unaware and unprepared. Keep a constant watch over your soul, and pray for the courage and grace to PREVAIL over these things that are destined to occur and that you will stand before the presence of the Son of Man with a clear conscience.” – Luke 21:34-36 (TPT) Many of us have faced the darkest nights of our soul. We have pushed down those traumatic experiences that are so evil we wouldn’t dare tell anyone for fear of what a family member or friend might think. Some of us may take these secrets and bury them so deep that we may no longer even think it happened to us but to someone else. Until one day, something triggers a memory that had been covered up by years of seeking worth, identity and purpose in all the wrong placess. As you’ll read from the women in these stories who I am so honored to call friends and even sisters, you’ll find that Jesus always finds a way to pull out the roots that are based on fears and lies, that have been growing inside to destroy us. Those intertwining, invasive roots that choke the heart first, then the body

their pain. God isn’t just healing me, He is also healing

is a process and true forgiveness requires action. My

my family.

greatest encouragement to anyone hurting is that

God’s ways are higher than ours and His path for redemption may look very different from what you planned. Rest in His peace knowing that His ways are the most beautiful and everlasting. If you will surrender and partner with God to do scary things that may offend human reasoning, He will bring true healing. My freedom from trauma is telling you this story today unashamed. Freedom takes courage and it is expensive; Jesus paid for our freedom with His life. I wanted to be healed instantly like the lady with the issue of blood, but I’m learning that emotional healing

Author Bio Amy Chanthaphavong is the CEO and CoFounder of London Valor, an IT fashion brand of smart handbags that creates efficiency for enterprising women. She was also crowned Miss Asian America, the first Laotian-American woman to be crowned in 2009, and is a former TEDx speaker, sharing her journey from “Fear to Fearlessness.” Amy is a creative leader with over 10 years of experience in marketing, sales, business development, content creation, client management and operations in the areas of technology, IT, real estate, media and banking. With a knack for adventure and social impact, she moved to Laos in 2014, one of the least developed countries in the world. There, Amy became a curator of the Vientiane Global Shaper Community, a network of city-based hubs initiated by the World Economic Forum. Her desire for social impact, love for stories, media and technology, also led her to create sharingamy. com, a space to share stories from her personal journey. Most recently, she took up surfing and is always looking for the next big wave.

valor is necessary in order to walk with God. No hero in the Bible or marvel comic book heroine lived in fear. They might have started with fear, but courage was always necessary for victory. You can follow Amy on Instagram: @sharingamy

A BANNER FOR THE BROKEN

By Ashley Lauren

t was my senior year of high school before graduation when the secret of my sexual assault

was finally released into the light. I remember that day too well, as it was the first time my body had ever experienced true sideswiped shock. It was a beautiful spring day in April of 2007, and my mom was combing my hair, preparing me to get it styled for our senior year fashion show. I know til this day even more so, the moment that happened next was completely a God thing, because though I don’t understand why these things happen, I know he doesn’t allow us to stay in darkness forever; especially when we’re transitioning from one season to the next. My mother casually but cautiously brought up that

someone in our family had accused another family member of multiple counts of sexual abuse. At first, I tried to play it off, because it was something I hid for so long that I had grown accustomed to the numb feeling I had towards this family member. But then my mom stopped combing my hair, looked at me and with a shaken tone, asked “Ashley, has this happened to you?” As I even type this, it brings tears to my eyes, to think how hard it must have been for my mother to even ask this of her daughter. And I know the answer genuinely came as the most darkened blow. My body started shaking uncontrollably, when I finally let out the truth I had held in for over 11 years of my life. Nothing can prepare you to have to tell your family, especially at that age when you had been sexually assaulted and abused as a child. Nothing. I went into a daze where my mind went somewhere

Making It Back To Shore By Cricket Leigh, LLMSW

s a Licensed Therapist who sees children and adolescents, I feel honored on a daily basis to bear witness to some of the most traumatizing stories and experiences a person can have. Many people ask how I can handle such tragic circumstances daily, but four years ago when I left my job, I knew I wanted to help young people by providing support and advocacy. So becoming a social worker with a specialization in trauma was the perfect fit. As a home-based therapist, I was able to go into the homes of my clients, to see every domain of their lives, meet every family member in their orbit, speak to their doctors, teachers, coaches, etc., in order to build a strong, trusting relationship with my clients so I could best serve them. Now, as an outpatient therapist, I strive to do the same in my office. Some have major mental health disorders, some have experienced or witnessed a trauma, while others are just “average” people who just need some extra support. As a child with anxiety who bit her fingers till they bled, I was confused why my brain didn’t work like the others did. I was hyper. I couldn’t stay quiet or focused, I couldn’t write a simple paper without re-writing it four times before turning it in. I couldn’t understand why I felt compelled to draw little dots all over my work in high school even though my friends made fun of me. I couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t walk over cracks for fear my mother would die because of it. As I grew up, some of these idiosyncrasies stayed with me but after working with a wonderful therapist, I was able to move on from most and now manage my anxiety very well. I see myself in the children I meet and my heart breaks for them because they may not have the supportive mother or the privileges I have had, so I know God brought me to this kind of work to make a difference, to connect to the disconnected,

and to let them know that their trauma or abuse does not, nor will not, define them. Most people think “trauma” means a physical health concern such as a head trauma from a car accident, but the kind I work with are mental health traumas, also known as “traumatic stress”, especially those that stem from sexual abuse. Some children experience this stress daily, and some only once, but research shows that no matter how many times or how far back in our childhood it may have occurred, the repercussions can live on in us for many years to come. In Greek, the word trauma means “wound” and according to John Rich from Wounded Places on PBS, it’s “when the strengths inside you and the inner resources around you cannot respond to a threat”. So for example, when a person is sexually abused, they are wounded at that moment, and throughout their lives if they do not address this wound by curating resilience, processing the traumatic events, and finding strength in natural support systems, it can become detrimental to their well-being as a whole. Here are four areas in which the trauma of sexual abuse can affect a survivor long after it occurs: MENTAL Those who have been sexually abused experience emotional responses to their trauma, including higher levels of anxiety, depression, panic attacks, Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), increased substance use, and suicidal ideation, than those who have not been sexually abused. Breaking it down further, survivors may exhibit racing thoughts, decreased ability to concentrate, difficulty in decision-making, forgetfulness, increased suggestibility, self-blame, blaming of others, flashbacks, numbness, paralysis

Beauty Starts In The By Katie Ballantyne

was that little girl. The one who could play with Barbies and dolls for countless hours! And with that came styling Barbie’s hair. Sometimes even trimming and cutting my Barbie’s hair was needed to achieve that perfect “look”. It was not uncommon for me to add makeup to my doll’s faces too. Oh my. Wasn’t my mother loving and gracious to allow this little creative soul to be expressed in these ways while I was at play? Indeed she was. God bless her! As a teen, I was definitely always experimenting with makeup and hair on myself and others. This was a new world for me and I loved every aspect of this thing called “beauty”. Well, it took me a little longer than some to finally give into my career calling but eventually I did. I suppose in God’s perfect timing it all came to pass. In my early twenties, I married a wonderful man (still my husband today) and our little family quickly grew. The Lord blessed us with a precious baby boy and then two years later, precious twin daughters. I chose to stay at home with our little ones when they were young, which I believe is such a special calling if you are a stay at home parent. Those were some of the best years of my life and I wouldn’t trade those days and times at home with my children for anything! God was so good to give me those years with our children. When our children reached school-age, we were at that stage where we were needing some extra income because we all know it’s not cheap raising kids these days. It had been about eight years since I last worked and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that the time had come in my life to pursue the work that had always been on my heart. With the encouragement of my husband and family, I went back to school to grow those skills that already existed in me. As we grow older, the sense of “it’s now or never” does come

knocking a little more often. So with God leading the way and my family completely behind me, I began a wonderful, new and fulfilling career in the beauty industry. I’ve never looked back. I’ve worked very hard to get to where I am today but God has also blessed my makeup artistry business beyond what I ever could’ve hoped for or imagined! He’s opened doors that I could’ve never opened on my own. I’ve been in the beauty industry for eight years now and have run a freelance makeup artistry business for six of those. I specialize in bridal makeup and do hair and makeup for lifestyle, editorial, fashion and TV. I am now able to put to use those gifts and abilities that God gave me at a young age. And looking back, I see how He created me with these gifts and desires to be creative. Having the chance to work with many different kinds of people, be artistic and creative, all the while being able to help people feel their best has been so rewarding. Having a business of my own also allows me to have some control over when I work and how much I work, which is a huge help to me while we are still raising our children who are now all teenagers. It is so important to me, to be extremely involved in their day to day lives, so I’m grateful my work allows me to do that. As Christian women, how do we bridge the two separate worlds of inward beauty with the outward appearance of makeup and hair? Is it a paradox? The best way I can explain this is summed up in one of my favourite beauty quotes: “Makeup is art. Beauty is spirit”. Can I hear an Amen? Beauty is ALL about spirit. Who we ARE, not what we look like. Beauty is about our personality, our soul, our heart.

Heart