Norhafsah Hamid
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: Faizah Hamid : Rahmah Pauzi : Auni Zainal : Nur’Ain Mamat : Ilham Nordin : Norhafsah Hamid : Husna Ab Rahman : Afifah Zul : Hani Raimi Ramli Husna Ab Rahman : Haziq Razack
LETTERS FOR THE FRAGILE HEART First Print October 2023 ISBN 978-967-2459-89-7
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Letter
1
Love and Be Loved “I’m an old-fashioned man and I don’t believe in dating. Plus, I would like to do things right, according to Islam. So, what I’m saying is, that I really do like you, and I want the privilege and opportunity to love you.” — ‘Syed Rasyid Syed Omar; Will You Stay?’
Dear heart, To love and be loved in return is a blessing. To be in an unrequited love is also a blessing— perhaps, the person is not good for us. To love and to be loved in return, but then to become unloved, is also a blessing—perhaps, the person is no longer good for us. Our hearts may be broken but it is still a blessing because God removed the person from our lives when we did not have the courage or strength to do so. In the end, to love and be loved for eternity only exists between us and God Almighty.
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Love Allah for the blessings by which He nourishes you, love me for the love of Allah, and love the people of my house for the love of me.” — ‘Hadith at-Tirmidhi1
Letter
2
Love Is a Gift “Reason is powerless in the expression of Love.” — Rumi.
Dear heart, Love is a gift. We can choose who we love but we cannot choose who we fall in love with. That is God’s Decree. Love can hit us when we least expect it. It can also leave us when we are certain it will stay. Love can make us deliriously happy. Love can also make us miserably tormented. One thing for sure, in whatever way love comes or appears, it is a blessing from God Almighty. Love yourself for being uniquely different. Embrace your special individuality. Appreciate your self-worth.
“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed, in that are signs for people who give thought.” — Quran 30:21
Letter
3
Love in Many Guises “The most beloved of people to me is he that points out my flaws to me.” — Umar Al-Khattab
Dear heart, To love with desire, is passionate love. To love unconditionally, is true love. To love but then it fades, is temporary love. To love but not loved back in return, is unrequited love. To love but to lose the love, is tragic love. To love God Almighty, is eternal. Not many have it but if you do, cling to it with all your might.
“Whoever loves to meet Allah, Allah loves to meet him. Whoever is averse to meeting Allah, Allah is averse to meeting him.” — Hadith al-Bukhari2
Letter
4
True Love “Reason is powerless in the expression of Love. Love alone is capable of revealing the truth of Love and being a Lover. The way of our Prophets is the way of Truth. If you want to live, die in Love; die in Love if you want to remain alive.” — Rumi.
Dear heart, True love is never having to change the person who we are, into someone whom we are not. Sincere love is being accepted as we are by the person whom we love. Pure love is being happy with the person whom we are with. True love is accepting the person unconditionally, flaws and all.
“Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire.” — Quran 3:14
Letter
5
The Language of Love “Speak with the language of love.” — Rumi.
Dear heart, A marriage needs proper communication between the two parties, for it to work. A muted marriage can lead to complication and quiet destruction. A vocal marriage may bring endless bickering and tumultuous break-up. Say exactly what we feel or need, in a gentle and peaceful manner. Shouting out our anger and frustrations will not solve the problem but will only make it worse. It is like pouring gasoline on a roaring fire. If we are not careful, the whole marriage can blow up in our face. Do not beat around the bush or waste our precious time, hoping that our other half would be able to read between the lines or figure out our cryptic messages. Talk clearly, directly, and with gentle affection. Being direct does not mean nastily blunt but rather, politely honest.
“Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.” — Quran 25:74
Letter
6
Cup of Tea “If you’re a freak then I am one, too. We are one of the same, Nieza. Two peas in a pod. Let us both be freaks, then. Two is better than one. Nieza, they can call you whatever they want. To me, you are never a freak but a beautiful soul. You are beautiful to me inside out. You always see the good in others even if others are mean to you. I love you for the person that you are.” — ‘Harris; Will You Love Me?’
Dear heart, You may not be everyone’s cup of tea and that is fine. It goes to show that you are not common or even ordinary. Perhaps, God made you a limited-edition kind of person or maybe, one in a million kind of tea. Always remember that beauty is from within, not from appearance. Appearances can be deceiving. Even a wolf can be dressed in sheepskin.
“And of His signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth and the diversity of your languages and your colours. Indeed, in that are signs for those of knowledge.” — Quran 30:22
Letter
7
Wind Beneath the Wings “Infinite mercy flows continually But you’re asleep and can’t see it.” — Rumi.
Dear heart, Do not fret and do not despair. For each one person who tries to put you down, rest assured that there will be others behind you holding you up. It is called love. Perhaps, you just cannot see them silently standing in the background. If we keep love in our hearts, it will grow and blossom, beautifully. But, if we keep hatred, envy, bitterness, and pain in our hearts, it will slowly rot and die.
“When a man loves his brother, he should tell him that he loves him.” — Hadith Abu Dawood3
Letter
8
In Sickness and in Health “Rasyid, when I agreed to be your wife, I meant it to be in sickness and in health.” — ‘Amy; Will You Stay?’
Dear heart, Marriage is a gift by God Almighty. If we do not work hard in safeguarding the gift, then it can potentially be destroyed. Nothing in this life is easy. If you want a life without turbulence or hardships, then you might as well be dead. But, in Islam, being dead does not mean the end of the story. Many forget that marriage is also a complete package. We need to take the good and the bad, the happiness and the sorrow, the hardship, and the ease. We must also learn to give and take, respect each other, and most importantly, love each other.
“Lord, let our spouses and children be the delight of our eyes and ourselves examples for the pious ones.” — Quran 25:74
Letter
9
Defnition of Love “If the house of the world is dark, Love will find a way to create windows.” — Rumi.
Dear heart, You can never force love. If someone refuses to love you, then your love will only be a one-sided affair. Sad but true. You will never be enough for the person. If someone is determined to leave you, then, no amount of persuasion will make the person stay. Sad but true. Nothing you say or do will change the person’s mind. If someone has stopped loving you, then nothing can stop the person from walking away. Sad but true. To make the person love you again might be an impossible feat. Nothing is more hurtful and painful than to love someone who does not love us back. But, do not despair. Let go and ask God to give us the strength to move on. Trust who God sends to you and who He takes away. “If Allah knows [any] good in your hearts, He will give you [something] better than what was taken from you, and He will forgive you; and Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.” — Quran 8:70
Letter
10
Temporary Gift “I’m also advising you to learn to let Rasyid go, if that is what Allah wills. Everyone that we have with us now, is only on loan to us. The world we live in is temporary. We can’t cling on to something that doesn’t belong to us. When the time comes, even we will return to Allah SWT.” — ‘Hassan; Will You Stay?’
Dear heart, Love is a gift. It cannot be rushed or forced. Sometimes, the gift is permanent and sometimes, it is temporary. If it is permanent, then it is a blessing. If it is temporary, then it is meant to stay with us, only for a while. Learn to let go and be happy.
“If Allah knows [any] good in your hearts, He will give you [something] better than what was taken from you.” — Quran 8:70
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