ILLUSTRADO GO> ISSUE 5 > 26-06-16

ISSUE 05

19•06•16

THE

BODY ISSUE ##KatawanKatawanKatawan

GENERATION BORTA

Decoding the Airbrushed Adonis

FITNESS HACKS

Get the body that you want, ASAP!

UTANG I’M NOT NA LOOB! FAT Manage your credit. We’ll tell you how.

You’re just obsessed

EDITOR’S NOTE/ CONTENTS

ISSUE 05

19th • JUNE • 2016

#katawankatawankatawan

Are you afraid to look into the mirror?

Or are you handsome Narcissus with the thousand selfies? Whatever your predilection is, there’s more than enough to chew on in this issue dedicated to the body and the Pinoy perspective on the physical form – from hacks to our fixations, to tips and tricks. And for those of you old enough to remember, may you be plagued with this LSS (last song syndrome) as you read through this edition of Illustrado GO - here’s a line from that camp ‘80s number - “Katawan, katawan. Ingatan ang inyong - katawan, katawan…” (eww)

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LALAINE CHU-BENITEZ Editor-in-Chief

PINOY-PROGRESSIVE

ILLUMINATI: THE BODY ECLECTIC >6 ATTACK OF THE AIRBRUSHED ADONIS >8 BODY HACKS >16 KEEPING UP WITH THE CON GEN: ARE BODY MASS AND CONFIDENCE DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL? >18 POWER TO THE PINOY: I’M NOT FAT. YOU’RE JUST OBSESSED. >19 USAPANG ILLUSTRADO: FILIPINO VERSUS FITNESS >20 IT’S WHAT I DO >22 MONEY: SAVING FOR RETIREMENT >48 LAW: NO DEBT SENTENCE >49

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

SCRAPBOOK: HYKU DESESTO, DARRYL ESPIRITU AND JOE AGDEPPA >24 ARTIST PROFILE: MARIELLE GUTIERREZ >32 ARTIST PROFILE: ERU ANII >34 ENTERTAINMENT >44

BEAUTY & FASHION

REAL STYLE, REAL PEOPLE >26 KAGANDAHAN 101: THE FIGHT LIFE >30 WEARING IT WELL: BANDOIX FLORES NEBRIA >31

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JUST BECAUSE

MY PINOY LIFE IN ANDORRA – ARLENE DE OCAMPO BATHAN >36 THINGS TO DO >42 SASSY PINAY: 5 BEST COMEBACKS WHEN SOMEBODY CALLS YOU FAT >43 ILLUSTRADO STUFF >45 COMMUNITY >46 RIGHT NOW, PHILIPPINES >50 THE PRACTICING MISIS: TUNA CHICKPEA PALAMANSALAD >51 ANNIE B.: BLOODY BLIND DATE >54 ONLI IN DA PILIPINS: I KNOW WHAT YOU DO DURING THE SUMMER >55 BLOG: STARTING ’OVEN’ AGAIN >56 illustrado go>3

Contributors

LALAINE CHU-BENITEZ Editor-in-Chief and aspiring urban farmer “almost superwoman” Lalaine has been driving Illustrado’s mission to uplift Filipinos in the region for almost a decade now. A former corporate dynamo living in Dubai for over 20 years, she shares nuggets of useful insights, not to mention tough love, with kababayans through her column “Power to the Pinoy.”

NICHOLO JALLORES

Associate Editor Nicholo Jallores regularly weight-trains, fight-trains, and eats very healthily. For all intents and purposes, he is Deadpool – but you ain’t never gonna see him post a shirtless photo until his body looks Ryan Reynolds’, coz a man’s gotta have standards, darn it.

KRIP YUSON Krip Yuson will soon have his third novel published, titled “The Music Child & the Mahjong Queen,” a follow-up on his seventh collection of poetry, “Islands of Words & Other Poems.” In this issue, the Palanca Hall of Famer celebrates the beauty of the female form.

BARNEY ALMAZAR, ESQ. MAI BAUTISTA

Mai is a Cancerian colorblind who finds joy in the verve of everyday drama.

Currently, he’s in the field of advertising and marketing, but dreams of putting up his own NGO when he grows up

ROSAN KATLEA REODICA – THE PRACTICING MISIS

Rosan is a Desert Mermaid who always wants to stay wet wherever she goes. She tells impatient people that she is a Practicing Misis, a woman of hits and misses. Being told she won’t be able to get married without learning to cook adobo, she has now learned to make her own pesto, guacamole and her own flavored taho. She still doesn’t have her own kitchen.

ABY YAP

What makes the Pinoy tick?

Aby Yap’s long-running column “Onli in Da Pilipins” often answers that question.

She talks about artistas, the pabebe, and the familiar Pinoy life, turning it into something fun and extraordinary. With a talent for finding every Juan’s funny bone, Aby’s wit and obvious affection makes the Filipino a whole lot more lovable.

TOYM Awardee Barney Almazar, Director at Gulf Law in the Middle East, Philippines and United Kingdom, is ‘the’ legal vanguard for Filipinos in the country. He has authored 4 books dedicated to inform and educate kababayans in the region about the legal system, as well as financial literacy.

EXCEL V. DYQUIANGCO

Our “Mr. Right Now, Philippines” writes and edits for a coffee table books publishing company. Since his boss is the biographer of Fidel V. Ramos, ANNA DE LEON he sometimes mingles with Life devoid of makeup and fashion is life lived in mediocrity top tier politicians. At one time, FVR even asked him to do – a sentence that Anna has push-ups (and we don’t know lived by since she discovered how that went!). Excel is also her 1st Vogue magazine at the author of the immensely the age of 9. Empowering popular children’s books “I women through beauty has Don’t Like to Eat” and “Lala always been her passion and Burara” (Messy Lala). she believes that women can rule the world in their stilettos, red lips and razor sharp intelligence.

CONSUL GENERAL PAUL RAYMUND CORTES When not performing his duties as the head of the Filipino community in Dubai and the Northern Emirates, or the obligations of a dutiful dad, passionate patriot Paul Raymund Cortes, mulls over how to further enrich the local Filipino community by promoting a more progressive mindset.

TRACY LEY

Beauty expert and blogger Tracy Ley aka “Ms. Tracy” is Illustrado’s resident sassy lioness. In this issue, she offers some choice suggestions on how to respond to people when they call you out on your weight.

KRISTINE ABANTE

(Quoting Albert Einstein) Kristine Abante says of herself, “I have no special talent, I am only passionately curious.” An entertainment industry expert, who spends her downtime looking for the next great adventure wherever she could find it, Kristine uses her writing to relive her experiences twice and to encourage others to join the ride.

From The Publishers of Illustrado Magazine

PUBLISHER & EDITOR-IN-CHIEF LALAINE CHU-BENITEZ CREATIVE DIRECTOR MON BENITEZ ASSOCIATE EDITOR NICHOLO JALLORES COLUMNISTS ABY YAP ALFRED “KRIP” YUSON BARNEY ALMAZAR FRANCISCO COLAYCO KRISTINE ABANTE EXCEL DYQUIANCO CONTRIBUTING WRITERS – UAE, PHILIPPINES, CANADA ANGELA MAPA ANNA OPOSA BARBARA MARCHADESCH CANDICE LOPEZ QUIMPO DANTE GAGELONIA DIDI PATERNO KARA SANTOS MARY ANN MARCHADESCH MARY ANN “MAPS” SANTOS NEPHELE KIRONG NIKKA SARTHOU NINA TEROL-ZIALCITA PRINCES NEDAMO QUAY EVANO RACHE HERNANDEZ REGINA LAYUG-LUCERO SHERRY TENORIO CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS –UAE, PHILIPPINES & USA EROS GOZE RAEN BADUA IRVIN RIVERA JEF ANOG ALEX CALUENG CRISTINA LINAZA ROZEN ANTONIO HERSON NEBAYA CONTRIBUTING FASHION CREW - UAE, HONGKONG, PHILIPPINES GINNO ALDUCENTE JESSIE TABLA VALENTINO MONTUERTO JASMIN

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ILLUMINATI

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Deconstructing the Filipino zeitgeist. In short, dibdibang pagmumuni-muni.

THE BODY ECLECTIC B y > K r i p Yu s o n

“Katawan katawan katawan katawan katawan… katawan!” went an old macho song of what-was-it, the ’80s? Of course whenever that Tagalog word is said, or aired in any way, the “body” it refers to would most likely be of the female gender.

Yes, even in this age of expanding LGBT communities.

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Well, when it’s a male torso being admired, it’s usually for one’s abs, which very few males have, even among athletes. In fact there’s been a supposedly scientific study saying that the common paunch is associated with better male lovers — per the opposite sex. No telling if the study was made by detractors of gym rats.

Getting back to the body in general, what is more commonly appreciated are the soft curves associated with females. The male torso is straight and rigid, its best aspects being wide shoulders and a deep chest, and occasionally, a narrow waistline. That’s about it. There’s nothing extraordinary or worth any comment when it comes to male thighs and legs.

For the female, au contraire. Her shape has sunk ships, fueled invasions and wars, inspired poetry and music. Her body is in the eyes of the beholder, since beauty is relative. And men’s eyes will forever appreciate the female form. For it is not formless, and can be formidable with its assets. illustrado go>8

From a well-turned ankle (past the foot fetishist’s focused gaze) to shapely legs, fleshy thighs, Kardashian bottom, and up, up, up to her other eye-catching attributes, the beholder’s gaze can indeed turn into a leer (oh, skip the wolf- whistle or catcall except in one’s soundless mind) while marveling at a bodacious bod.

“She walks in beauty like the night” because she has infinitely more curves and arcs and mounds than her counterpart, which is simply like sweaty high noon. And because all those facets are mysterious and mystifying, hiding the vastly imaginable like night, until the layers of dark ignorance are stripped away.

Ah, the consummation of full sight! This septuagenarian opines that if one strolls around or lazes on a beach reserved for a nudist colony, the eyes can only be appreciative of the naked female form.

She is the body electric, and with all the variations in proportion and cup sizes and wax styles above that cynosure of delight, then we may also say that hers is the body eclectic.

Unfortunately for septuagenarians, a body also refers to one’s own — and which now often brings up only associations with diagnostic lab terms such as CBC, ECG, BP, and such other medical initials that strike fear when they’re served up with figures, in the form of numbers that rest within, or border, or fall short or go beyond a range of minimum and maximum allowables.

This then is the inevitable chapter of that narrative arc that features the body entropic.

But then, one can still wish for good sight or vision — whether helped along by specs of a kind, or laser treatment — that still allows enjoyment of the original, primal, fundamental feast of body. Hers. From the arch that hugs clogs, close enough to the well-turned ankle, and up up up to the cleavage that invites imagination, like the ankh that Cleopatra may have worn, dangling from her milky, elongated neck, as the symbol of life.

Ah, body.

FEATURE

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The At t a ck o f t h e Air br ush e d A do n i s By> Mai Bautista One that can’t be missed

He stands tall and proud like a gazing falcon every morning at the corner of your street while waiting for a cab ride to work.

He is that citrusy-musky-smelling-alwayswell-put-together bloke who queues in front of you to get his tuna rocket salad (with olive oil dressing only) as you order your greasy burger and chips at lunch break. He works at the same office as yours, and he is always the top-of-the-mind McSteamy choice of your colleagues during ungodly afternoon gossip hours. He is that Joe you see in the shop whose trolley is full of organic items, salmon fillet, and rye bread every Friday morning. He is that neighbor you ride the lift with every night when you come home from work - that guy who’s always in sweaty jerseys and trainers, carrying a huge gym bag with a Fitbit wrapped around his wrist. He is that Greekgodly Adonis you see at Friday brunches, the one who never fails to be immaculately dressed with his shiny weekend loafers, buttoned-down white linen shirt and cropped jeans. Even on a hangover, he still looks airbrushed and fresh from the shower. He is that lean and tan local starlet illustrado go>10

that you see on your Instagram search with thousands of followers. His snaps usually showcase parts of his physique with muscles tensed, biceps flexed, abs exposed, and are always captioned with “no pain, no gain” inspirational quotes, and hashtagged #fitnessgoals.

Yes, he is that guy. And he is everywhere, every time. He has conquered your daily life, your seemingly okay routine.

He has subjugated your weekend conversations with your posse. He has declared war against your anticipated #netflixbingesaturdays uploads. He has made you feel ashamed to ask the sales associate for a medium sized shirt at the store when you shop for clothes. He enjoys the weekend top bill on nightclub pictures posted on Facebook on Saturday evenings by your acquaintances.

Inarguably, he is happening and he shows no signs of retreat. He has made his apparition and everyone, including you, has been entranced in a hazy cult. The Spornosexual has finally arrived. He is the one you just can’t seem to ignore.

What is Spornosexual?

The Spornosexual is the millennial phenomenon that was birthed by the Metrosexual of the 90’s. He is the sophisticated hybrid of the male specie, which has already evolved from wanting to look good by merely investing in grooming and wardrobe, to actually feeling good. He accomplishes this feat by spending half of his waking week working out mercilessly in his natural habitat - the gym. He is not your ordinary gym buff who finds happiness doing cute cardio and Pilates. He goes for the full Brad Pitt from Fight Club effect, with advanced routines that require an enormous amount of physical strength, patience, resilience, and time.

Mark Simpson, an English author coined the term Spornosexual in 2014 to succinctly describe the “hardcore, sexedup, and body-centered second generation metrosexuals”. According to Simpson, the Spornosexual treats his well-sculpted physique as the ultimate faculty to sustain his high demand in a social ecosystem where everyone tries to stand out or at least be heard.

FEATURE

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Inarguably, he is happening and he shows no signs of retreat. He has made his apparition and everyone, including you, has been entranced in a hazy cult. The Spornosexual has finally arrived.

The geeky part

In Sociology, it has been said that humans have the innate need to network. We interact and engage with people on our wavelength, as it is one of the major variables that constitute our overall happiness. When one interacts, and someone else engages, an interesting dialogue builds up. From it, we take away something that subconsciously makes us feel recognized and appreciated. This is tantamount to saying that we experience some sense of belongingness with this occurrence. This is our nature, a simple recognizable truth.

With the advent of social media a decade ago, the paradigm was to make technology vis-à-vis public conversations regardless of time and proximity. Little did we know that over a short period of time, this would evolve into something more complex, as we engage in forums that do not only involve current events, but broken-down life aspects that could be as simple as what your friend is having for dinner.

Social media has become more intimate and personal than ever. We open up our lives to the public 24/7. We snap pictures of ourselves in front of our bathroom mirrors. We obsess about our heartbreaks with quotes about sour-graping towards acceptance and healing. We upload snippets of our simple pleasures and triumphs of being able to travel to foreign cities. We celebrate on social media during reunions and family gatherings. We update our Facebook statuses when we see beautiful sunsets and we poetize how it makes us feel nostalgic.

Then, we feel excited when a close friend comments on that snap of your road trip, more so when our other friends comment and join the conversation. We feel giddy when our crushes like our selfies. We deem these likes as their appreciation of our best profile, and to some extent, that maybe they have a crush on you too.

bodily achievements (and hashtags).

The Spornosexual, though he may come across as too curated and unapproachable, is not oblivious of this give and take concept on social media. He gives his followers something that they will be excited about or aspiring for. The followers then give back their words of idolatry, or maybe questions that the Spornosexual could provide answers for to inspire them.

That. Is. Human nature, digitized.

Who are we to judge when we, like them, only hope for recognition to feel that we also belong? They are here to stay; we are here to remain. We all have to co-exist.

After all, aren’t we all stereotypes?

The result? A conversation. A dialogue. An exchange of power. Beauty for likes; likes for appreciation; appreciation for some sense of belongingness.

No hate

Spornosexuals have been stereotyped as male gym buffs who seemingly have nothing else to offer but their aesthetics.

They have become the cleaner sporty pornstar kind who incessantly bombard our social media feed, titillating us with their show of some skin. At some point, it becomes annoying as it seems that they have nothing else to offer, when we try to find something more sensible and profound than their skin-deep looks.

But then again, it wouldn’t hurt if we realize that maybe, they too are searching for something more empathic and tolerant from us when all we do is raise our eyebrows and critique their hard-earned

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FITNESS

#BODYHACKS Want a body that turns heads, stops traffic, and generates a billion double taps on Instagram? It’s not as effortless as some of those social media Aphrodite’s and Adonis’es make it out to be. Oftentimes it could feel like the ascent of Sisyphus. You roll and roll that boulder up the hill and just when it feels like you’ve reached the apex, you stumble on some damnable pebble and you come crashing back down, pride-first. It ain’t easy being fleeky, but it’s ain’t impossible either. Here are some quick and dirty tips on how to achieve that alpha summer-bod, from some of the Middle East’s most admired fitness pro’s.

Gabriel Amante Personal Trainer & Fashion Designer B o d y H a c k # 1 Summer’s the perfect time to jump in the water! Do laps in the pool if know how to swim. If you don’t, now is the perfect time to learn. If you’re more of an outdoorsy kind of person, try surfing or any beach activity. When you engage your body in any of these activities, you burn more calories as compared to doing aerobic exercises on land due to water resistance on every movement.

B o d y H a c k # 2 Do lots of leg exercises – squats, calf raises, etc. This goes for both guys and girls out there. Summer is board shorts and bikini season so this is the season where you show them off more than ever. A common mistake people do during their summer prep is that they focus all their time on their upper body. Your body won’t look good and function well if it is not well-proportioned.

B o d y H a c k # 3 Diet. Try hard to fight the temptation of going for ice cream or halo-halo every now and then when it’s 40 degrees Celsius outside. Go for frozen yogurt instead. You can also do home made fresh fruit yogurt treats simply by freezing your favorite fruits in the freezer like bananas, apples, berries and etc.

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Photo by Alex Callueng

FITNESS

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FITNESS

Rica Rodriguez and Divine Masinsin Group Exercise Manager and Senior Pilates Instructor B o d y H a c k # 4 When at the gym, go for high reps and crank up the weights while you’re at it. Aim for 2-3 sets of 20-25 repetitions for every muscle group.

B o d y H a c k # 5 In the kitchen, chew it instead of drinking it. Many think that smoothies and fresh juices are the best options to go for. Just think, 5 oranges = 1 glass of juice. You won’t get to eat 5 oranges! Try keeping sodium intake on a low as well.

B o d y H a c k # 6 We repair and build muscles when we sleep. Getting enough rest (7-8 hours) will not only leave you feeling fresh and energetic, it will also reduce the amount of cortisol (a stress hormone that contributes to fat storage) in your body.

Photo by Alex Callueng

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FITNESS

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FITNESS

Ronald Molit Triathlete B o d y H a c k # 7 Be active. Get into a sport that you will enjoy. For me, I started doing triathlons 5 years ago and enjoyed it so much that I’ve been training 6 times a week.

B o d y H a c k # 8 Hydrate. With the training that I do plus living in a place where it’s extremely humid during most days of the year, I drink a lot of fluids. Being well-hydrated helps my metabolism and prevents fat deposits.

B o d y H a c k # 9 Get enough rest. I’ve tried over-training and I would either get injured or sick. When that happens, it becomes harder to get back into my exercise routine. I also tend to overeat because my metabolism slows down. So now I see to it that I get enough rest at night and during my days off.

Photo by Alex Callueng

Trish Sanchez Personal Trainer B o d y H a c k # 1 0 Detoxify and burn fats by drinking water infused with slices of lemon, cucumber and ginger. This is better than drinking sodas and juices with high sugar content. This infused water works like a miracle and can make you lose weight.

B o d y H a c k # 1 1 Weight training doesn’t make us women big! But cupcakes definitely do! Weight training makes muscles more toned not big. So if you want a more defined abs then start lifting weights.

Photo by Alex Callueng

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B o d y H a c k # 1 2 Unstable blood sugar levels make us crave sweets. It’s actually not psychological but it is physiological.

Most of the time it’s our fault because we got our bodies used to consuming foods like chips, chocolates, or to eating too much heavy carbs, like bread and rice.

If we train our body to eat more natural foods, the healthier kind, then our sugar level will be stabilized and the cravings will disappear.

FITNESS

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FITNESS

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FITNESS

Renuel Sanchez Fitness Professional and Gym Manager B o d y H a c k # 1 3 Eat 4 to 5 small meals a day to boost your metabolism, skipping breakfast and then having a big lunch and dinner is the worst eating habit that most people have.

B o d y H a c k # 1 4 Stock on healthy food at home. If you are hungry, it’s most likely that you will pick up that bag of chips. But if you have healthier options readily available, then you just brought yourself a step closer again to that 6-pack you’ve been hoping for.

B o d y H a c k # 1 5 Learn to love working out, think of your health and that beautiful figure will follow as a reward. Invest your money in a gym otherwise that money will go to future hospital bills. And sadly, you won’t develop a 6-pack while you are sick.

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KEEPING UP WITH THE CONGEN > Tales from your friendly neighbourhood Philippine Consul-General.

Are Body Mass and Confidence Directly Proportional?

F(x) = Body mass : self Worth By > Consul General Paul Raymund Cortes

…In the actual scheme of things, self-worth should not even be a function of height and weight. Who you are is dependent entirely on your humanity and your soul.

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School year openings were always a dose of reality for me. While my friends took for granted the fact that they were taller than they were at the end of the previous school year, I was stuck where I was. Each year, I desperately prayed for a few inches, wondering how it felt to be within the acceptable height-age bracket. You see, as a child, I was on the miniscule side – shorter and skinnier than most. When it came to school queues, I was always first in line. My shirts were a size XS. My high school jeans were a size 22 and remained so well until my college years. My body built was diminutive, to say the least.

And year in and year out, it seemed that my confidence level was destined to be as puny as my frame.

I suppose we all start out thinking of size as a measure of one’s confidence. Young ladies, most specifically, believe they are more appealing if they are into the slim to ultra-thin body range. Teenage boys, on the other hand, feel that the buffer they are, the manlier they appear. In my case, I noticed a gradual increase in my confidence level as I began adding a few inches after my high school years and as illustrado go>20

I started gaining a little more mass when I was in my early 20s, after my university years. Comfortable pants for me were pushing into the size 24-26 range, still well within the slim category, though I relentlessly pursued bulk (snicker if you wish but at this point, it was obvious that I would never reach my dreamt 5’10”,) believing that it would do wonders with my morale.

I must have grown tired of musing about height and mass as I questioned at some point, must body size be even a determinant of one’s sense of self? How much self-worth does one gain when one is much taller than most or when he gains mass or when she dramatically thins up?

I’ve had the privilege of speaking at a few Completion Ceremonies of those finishing Junior High School in the past couple of weeks and I see the physical insecurities I wrestled with as a kid in some of our young folk. I am reminded of that young me who years later would be comfortable in his niche. The answers never came within the snap of a finger. I learned in time that confidence in oneself is simply the product of the interplay between our moments of doubt and self-realization. It is embracing

the reality that one’s worth is never a variable of one’s height or weight or muscle build up. Our value as persons cannot be written as a linear equation of the variables of our physical selves.

Perhaps with age, one gets to be more attuned to his/her total package. As the years go on, we finds it more ludicrous to correlate weight or mass directly with our esteem, a theory teens and those in early adulthood grapple with on a daily mode.

I address these young minds, hoping that they would one day realize that in the actual scheme of things, self-worth should not even be function of height and weight.

Who you are is dependent entirely on your humanity and your soul. Just as I eventually found out that I am, regardless of any of my physical manifestations, I know these young adults will do too. When that dawns upon them, they will bask in the glory of enjoying their place under the sun without having to resort to doubting the bodies that temporarily represent them.

POWER TO THE PINOY

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Towards empowering Filipinos.

In the progressive world, it is not PC (politically correct) to be calling or labelling people ‘fat,’ whereas, in our community, it’s usually part of casual conversation – just like how the Brits would talk about the weather.

Dahling, I’m not fat. You’re just obsessed.

By> Lalaine Chu-Benitez

“Kamusta na? Eto, nananaba.”

We, Pinoys are so obsessed about our weight and the way we look. We just don’t know it but we’re absolutely fixated on perfection - whatever that means in our head.

Does this sound familiar? “Forget about that nice dress with the perfect color, I can’t bare my arms because they are sooo big.” “I need to hide my ‘extra curves’ because I ate so much food during my holiday.” We can’t wear a swimsuit because we’re insecure of that extra baggage on the tummy. Sometimes, even with swimsuit on, you can’t let go of the towel because of that peklat (scar) on the left thigh you’ve been nursing since you were six years old, or in case your singit (groin) or even armpits (que horror!) are not ‘white enough’. Boys can’t go topless on the beach, because of the slightest of paunches - or maybe that ‘dad bod’ they’ve had forever.

We go over our ideal weight by a mere hair (read: isang guhit lang) and we feel so fat and ugly. We’re so self-conscious, we feel guilty and apologetic after having a sinfully satisfying meal (thought balloon – diet the next day, diet the next day, diet the next day…).

This obsession has become so consuming that some of us even feel the need to medicate. In my former corporate life in the pharmaceutical industry, I was astounded to learn via a market study, that Filipinas then where the main buyers of a certain brand of fat blocker. Something that surprised non-Pinoy pharmacists, since these Filipina consumers, were in fact, slim or average sized compared to other nationalities that were more prone to obesity.

But this fixation gets even worse when we start applying that skewed perspective when we look at other people. In the progressive world, it is not PC (politically correct) to be calling or labelling people ‘fat,’ whereas, in our community, it’s usually part of casual conversation – just like how the Brits would talk about the weather.

“Kamusta?” “Hoy, ang taba-taba mo na, ha!”

Seriously? Since when has it been okay to prick somebody’s confidence, or crush somebody’s self-image (depending on how body-conscious they are), in the first two seconds of meeting – just when you’re supposed to be saying your “hi’s” and “hello’s”?

Ah, the pitfalls of growing up in a community where the preference is for the

balingkinitan na maputi at makinis (the slim-fair-smooth one).

But hey, just look at the others. Sure, Hollywood and media in general have played a big part in contributing to selfloathing in this day and age, but go visit the pool, the beach, or even the gym. In fact, just look around you. You will find non-Filipinos of different shapes and sizes, including BBWs (Big Beautiful Women) and BBBs (Big Beautiful Boys) out there in the open. They’re confident about themselves and couldn’t care less about what others might think.

In need of an injection of confidence? Just look at somebody imperfect, perfectly fine with themselves and go from there.

That is not to say that we shouldn’t be working on being fit and healthy, and improving ourselves. But more than anything else, we need to work on learning to love ourselves – love handles, peklats and all. Because no amount of crunches, or even fat blockers, will purge you from that self-loathing when you look into the mirror and face your truth.

We are beautiful. And you best believe it.

Power to the Pinoy. Let’s stop obsessing about weight, shall we? illustrado go>21

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ILLUSTRADO >

Say no to usapang barbero. Dapat, Illustrado!

FILIPINOS VS. FITNESS Being a fit Filipino isn’t exactly a cakewalk, given the kind of food that we normally enjoy, or the way food takes center stage in most of our familial milestones. Unlike the majority of our Western counterparts, we kabayans are comfort eaters, above all. We like abundance, and richness; food that are so heartwarming, they feel like hugs. But oddly enough, we Filipinos are also incredibly obsessed with body shape. On top of the usual “hi’s!” and “hello’s,” we greet each other with “Uy, antaba mo,” or “Uy, pumapayat ka!” We’ve actually managed to make criticizing one’s weight a part of our daily courtesies!

Why are we so caught up in this sordid business of shapeshaming? Just how important is fitness to us, really?

who are up for going under the knife for the sake of beauty but it’s just not my cup of tea.

Being fixated on fitness and aspiring for a certain body type is okay as long as that pursuit brings joy in your life. It depends on the reason why you’re doing it. If you are only doing it to gain likes on social media or if you do it to please your partner..how are you going to keep up with that? You have to do it for you. You have to do it for your happiness.

Louise Monique Soriano-UAE Physical appearance, body shape & fitness are important to me though sometimes I tend to neglect it. I have a love/hate relationship with fitness but nonetheless, I accept and love my body through thick and thin. Right now, I think I need to improve my physique. I have been neglecting exercise for quite a while and I know I have to get back at it soon. In terms of surgical and non-surgical methods of improving how I look, I’m only up for non-surgical method. I don’t have any issue with people

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Ronna Rita Garcia Ellsworth-USA Physical appearance is important to me because I believe that one should present the best person that they can be. We come in different shapes and sizes , beauty is in the eye of the beholder. No matter how physically attractive a person is. If one is insecure, mean and has an ugly personality, the ugliness will eventually show.

Personally I’ve experienced this. I used to be 250 lbs. Most of my friends and family would say “ I never saw you that way”. I

was always perceived as a confident person with a great sense of style. I believe one should find the best aspect of themselves and showcase it. Always put your best foot forward. Not a copycat because you will never be satisfied. I do plan to have reconstructive surgery (mommy makeover) this year. I am getting myself physically fit to control my blood sugar ( I used to be insulin dependent diabetic ). Making sure my post surgical recovery is uneventful. I believe that my outer shell should show the inner me- a sexy, vibrant, talented woman.

Mother Nature needs a little help in that

USAPANG

ILLUSTRADO >

Say no to usap ang barbero. Dapat, Illustrado!

aim for a certain body type if it is for the right reasons. We want to be fit because we want to be healthy, happy and live a longer life. I am happy and confident with my body but it does not mean I have to stop from making it even better. I cannot stop aging and I cannot control the various external factors that affect my body. In a world that is constantly altering the definition of beautiful, sexy and fit, I need to keep up. I need to be proactive to ensure that I continuously improve as well. department.

Brenda Tugelida-Lumanlan - UAE Fitness ranks high on my priority list.

To be fit is to always feel healthy and strong and to have the ability to control my body. I can only accomplish that by having a balanced diet, a lot of water intake, sufficient sleep and rest, a daily dose of laughter and exercise and most importantly having people around me that exudes positive energy. To ensure I remain attractive, I consciously make an effort to go beyond just about how I look, but how I feel about the way I look. Being attractive is not confined within the image that I see when I look at the mirror. I need to constantly develop my personality enough to pull in the attention of others. I always make sure that I am confident in what I do and that I should always know the right thing to say.

There is nothing wrong with being passionate when it comes to fitness and to

Jeremy De Chavez - Philippines The importance of fitness in my life varies.

There are moments when I am heavily invested in my body, but there are also moments when I convince myself that to invest so much time and effort to pointless vanity is alarmingly narcissistic and perhaps, ironically, even unhealthy. So, its importance in my life ebbs and flows, but I

don’t think that it’s necessarily a bad thing.

Rather, for me it signals a tendency towards balance and moderation. The problem, as I see it, is excess; that is, to fall in either extremes of the spectrum; to either be fascistically devoted to working out at the expense of other aspects of one’s life or to be neglectful of one’s health under the pretext of keeping true to one’s supposed principles. So it really is just the rather banal problem of balance, of negotiating the tug-of-war between those two opposed tendencies.

I think much of what we consider as the ideal body is controlled—even insidiously manipulated—by the media. Bodies come in irreducibly diverse forms and shapes but it seems that only a select few get exposure and representation. Just think about the types of bodies you see on movies and TV and compare those to the type you encounter in daily experience. The gulf is far and wide. It’s also deceptive that those ideal bodies are depicted as involved in the same type of life that regular people live. So, the problem is that those images may set standards that are near impossible to reach and the fitness industry has taken the impossible and made it a challenge.

I think we must resist that and be able to distinguish between image and reality.

Health must mean a balance between mental, emotional, and physical health. We have to learn to be comfortable in our own skin and not in someone else’s.

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Filipino Progress & Diversity

post was localized in 2002. In the same year, I joined Orient Irrigation Services under the capacity of Small Contracts Manager.

Paquito Jacinto Idos – MSCM, PEM Project Manager – Sharjah Electricity and Water Authority Sharjah, UAE MY JOB Last July 2015, I joined Sharjah Electricity and Water Authority as Project Manager under their Program Progress Department where I am directly reporting to the Chairman. To say that my career in this country has been exciting is quite an understatement. In 1998, I ventured to the UAE and was lucky enough to be hired as Supervisor in Dubai Municipality, until my

With God’s blessing, another opportunity came to me in Aril 20015. I was hired to work with a Government agency in Sharjah as a Civil Engineer, and in a span of 3 years, I was promoted as Senior Projects Engineer, and then as Projects and Planning Manager until May 2015.

MY WORK DAY My day in the office starts with an early morning coffee discussion with our PPD Team, to review our progress and to prepare action plans for the challenges ahead. My main responsibility is to assist the Department Manager in ensuring that all activities are executed without fail. Part of my responsibilities is to provide technical advice to the Chairman of the Organization on key matters such as review of technocommercial offers, drawings and contract agreements, and other executive-level directives. I also travel to other countries in Asia and Europe to attend and witness

vendors, and manage clients’ investment through relevant mix of media and target.

Marlon C. Soliven Media Buying Executive Dentsu Aegis Network Dubai, UAE MY JOB I am a Media Buying Executive under Dentsu Aegis Network and handle one of their top clients, General Motors. As part of the Amplify division of DAN, we try our best to secure ad placements for our clients, invest advertising slots to appropriate illustrado go>24

MY WORK DAY I usually start my morning with coffee to pump me up for a busy day ahead.

Work usually consists of meetings with suppliers and negotiating with them as to what extent prices and rates need to be approved. Meetings consist of call-ups, face-to-face and email conversations back and forth during the day. Busy day ends around mid-afternoon but team huddles come around during this time as well. We usually do this to makes it a point to update each other about what bookings need to be sent across to supplier and data updating.

The job is demanding, but it’s not always hectic. On work days, my daughter usually buzz me up to remind me how much she misses me and how she wants me to go home early to play with her and her new toy doll. My career is fast moving and everchanging, but my daughter reminds me that I will always have something sure and secure to come home to: my family.

at the work place >

factory acceptance tests for equipment ordered for the projects.

CAREER ADVICE Filipinos are known for being well educated, hardworking, and honest professionals.

Based on my 30 years of experience in the construction industry, my advice is to plan for your career path. If you do not know how to do something, seek advice and try to live with what you have. You need to reward yourself for your hard work, but learn how to prioritize things and know the difference between what you really need and what you want. Plan properly for your future.

Finally, do not stop learning. Invest in yourself by seeking higher education.

Keep up with technological advancements and stay globally competitive. My colleagues and I conduct a workshop for PEM (Professional Engineering Manager) Certification under ASEM (American Society for Engineering Management). I invite all the Filipino engineers and architects in the UAE to avail of this opportunity to upgrade their educational qualifications.

MY GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT I take great pride in getting my family to come to Dubai and stay with me. A better life for our families is all we can ever hope for as Overseas Filipinos, but to have your family with you is even better. I count myself blessed, having my wife and my cute daughter with me here in Dubai. Together, we have made a real home in this foreign country.

CAREER ADVICE Hard work pays. This is what I believe in.

When you focus on the task at hand and work very hard on it, success come easy. As long as we work to the best of our abilities, any job or task that we do would manifest in greatness. To my fellow Filipinos out there who are away from their loved ones and are working hard in the foreign country: you are not alone. We all face the same difficulties, albeit in different degrees and forms. Make the best of your stay in your host country, and stay true to your mission objective, that is, to be the best that you can be and make a better future for yourself and your family.

SCRAPBOOK >

HYKU DESESTO UAE http://www.hykudphotography.com

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SCRAPBOOK >

JOE AGDEPPA UAE www.joeagdeppa.com

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SCRAPBOOK >

DARRYL ESPIRITU UAE https://darryl.see.me

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REAL STYLE, REAL PEOPLE

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Authentic, street-level suave and swankiness.

cool in the r in cooler climeshowortokeeping g down the street e struttinthese Whether they’ring swagge istas knowstyle pickskeepthistheir Filipino fashion heat, region’s swelter week from best ere. Take a lookfromat our - anywhere and everywh around the world.

Filipino style bloggers

ALYSSA NICOLE Dubai - UAE www.technemoda.com

GILLIAN UANG Cebu, Philippines www.bydetails.com

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REAL STYLE, REAL PEOPLE

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Authentic, street-level suave and swankiness.

DOMINIQUE TIU Cebu - Philippines www.konichiwear.com

BETTINA MICU Dubai - UAE Photo by Gied Sarmiento & Gerald Chua www.bettina-micu.com illustrado go>29

REAL STYLE, REAL PEOPLE

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Authentic, street-level suave and swankiness.

LO PASCUAL Abu-Dhabi - UE www.locloset.blogspot.com

LAUREEN UY Queensland, Australia www.breakmystyle.com

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REAL STYLE, REAL PEOPLE

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Authentic, street-level suave and swankiness.

KARL LEUTERIO Queensland, Australia www.inkarlcerating.com

PATRICIA PRIETO Manila, Philippines www.itsparadigma.com

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BEAUTY

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Kagandahan 101

The Fight Life By> Anna De Leon

Mixed martial arts is a relatively new sport, but undoubtedly, it has arm-barred the world into subscribing into a new standard of fitness: the ability to physically overcome those who would cause harm to us and our’s. It is a primal instinct, the need to protect one’s self and territory, but now more than ever, people are seeing the practical value of taking up what is now commonly referred to as “The Fight Life.” Take Anna De Leon as an example. Don’t let this make up maven and style savant’s diminutive frame fool you. The lady literally packs a punch. Here, she chronicles the reasons why you might want to rethink your life as a pacifist. After all, we live in a world of constant conflict. We might as well know how to defend ourselves.

Like everyone who wanted to adapt a healthier lifestyle, I, too was looking for a physical activity that will not bore me, will challenge me, and more importantly, something that I will stick to. I found all of this in Mixed Martial Arts. Let me tell you just what exactly you get out of training for this amazing sport: 1. Discipline: Embracing what I love to call as “The Fight Life” calls for a lot of discipline in all aspects of your life. In order to punch, elbow, knee and kick your pads, you will need awesome cardio, which means, if you are a smoker, you have to ditch the habit. To learn jaw dropping sweeps and chokes you need to pay attention to your Professor, each day on the Jiujitsu mats is a day of learning… which brings me to point number 2 2. Patience: You think Ronda Rousey became an MMA superstar just like that?

Hours in the dojo made her the superstar

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that she is now. Learning a technique can be said as easy but applying it is different ball game. You need countless rolling times on the mat in order for you to do that.

6. For those tank top worthy guns: Have you seen Holly Holms’ arms? Enough said!

If straight punches for 3 minutes won’t sculpt your arms, I don’t know what will.

3. Focus: When you walk into a jiujitsu class, throw away all the stresses of the day and focus on the technique of the day.

When drilling focus on getting it right.

When rolling focus on applying it. Before you know it you will be driven by focus and anything you desire to have will simply be one focus away.

7. Legs for Days: Roundhouse kicks that are required in Muay Thai tones the legs like no other.

4. Security: Nothing feels better than knowing that when the situation calls for it you can protect yourself and your loved ones.

5. Amazing Cardiovascular Conditioning: As mentioned earlier, I have dabbled into all kinds of physical activity and nothing can compare to the cardiovascular conditioning that Muay Thai offers

8. Stress Relief: We all accumulate stress, some more than others and having a punching bag or practice pads as an outlet feels fantastic. I honestly think that this this outweighs all the other benefits of Muay Thai.

If the mental and physical benefits of embracing “The Fight Life” isn’t enough to lure into stepping into the mats or grabbing your boxing gloves, I invite you to watch a class, be awed and yes… get hooked!

WEARING IT WELL

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How to work it when you wear it coz you’re worth it.

BANDOIX FLORES NEBRIA FAS H I O N D E S I G N E R

What role does fashion play in your daily life?

As a designer, being one with Dubai’s high fashion and haute couture community is important to me, not just for my professional career, but also for inspiring the way I run my daily life. Kailangan lagi akong couture. It’s not just a label to me. It’s a mindset. It’s a value that I live everyday. It helps me maintain my status, and my waistline!

But style and aesthetics nonewithstanding, my strong set of morals defines my existence.

I’m just glad that I am able to translate this level of integrity to my work. They call me klassista.

For me, dapat palagi class lang.

What do you typically wear daily? What are your favorite things to wear?

Fashion is my life. This has always been the case with me. I can’t remember a time

when fashion figured low on my priorities. To me, I look at it as if I am always on the runway, 24-7. I love black. I love timeless pieces.

I will not be caught dead looking uncoordinated. Some people may call it “safe.” I think it’s about being put-together well, and having a sense of elegant order – think Jackie O! Suffice it to say, I cannot go out wearing a top with an abstract print. Mamatay ako!

What is your fashion

Photo by Jef Anog

philosophy?

Fashion is my existence. I will live, eat, and breathe fashion to the very end. That’s really the best way to think about it: fashion as a longterm commitment. Planado na nga na pag namatay ako, everyone who wants to attend my mourning must be wearing black or else they wont get a pass to see my urn jar! illustrado go>33

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

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Celebrating Filipino artistry, passion, and cleverness.

MARIELLE CASTRO Singer and Songwriter

MY LOVE FOR MUSIC I started singing when I was about 4. I was a very bibo kid! Since kindergarten I had always been involved in school activities and programs. I started songwriting when I came to Dubai about 6 years ago, upon the urging of friends and fellow musicians. Music has become a form of escape from the daily things and routinely tasks that I do. And hey!

We’re Filipino’s! Who doesn’t love singing anyway? I bet none!

MY WRITING STYLE I can’t say that I have one style of songwriting, or that I can plot the process down to one organized system. Honestly it’s different with every song that I write. One time, I was on a bus that was travelling the length of Jumeirah road. I got really bored that I started thinking about my life here in Dubai – how it’s like living in a perfect world, or how it feels right and surreal but still lacking.

Sometimes I just sit on the couch, and strum a chord or two and that’s it! It flows.

It’s organic.

MY PERSONAL MILESTONES First is having 2 of my songs produced

by GMA records back home: Bubble and Escape. Second is co-producing my EP and recording it in Nashville TN. But by far, my favorite achievement is receiving a recognition from Awit Awards and PARI for the songs that I wrote. I was also nominated for the Best Performance by a Female Recording Artist category. I didn’t win, but the nomination was a feat enough in itself. Looking at it framed at our house reminds me that, hey, I really am a songwriter.

MY PLANS

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Honestly, nothing. Some gigs maybe around Dubai if I get invites. At the moment, I’m trying to focus on other aspects of my life, like being a nurse and laser therapist and just really enjoying life.

You’ll never know what’s coming anyway.

I’m hopeful. I’m still looking forward to writing some more songs and having the time to sit and focus solely on the music.

MY ADVICE TO FELLOW ARTISTS You’ve heard it many times, but it’s true: be real and authentic, not for anybody else, but for you.

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

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Dubai teems with brilliantly talented Filipino singers - but singersongwriters? Not so much. This is where a talent like Marielle comes in as a breath of fresh air. She is a singer, a songwriter, and an instrumentalist. The consummate musician.

Connect with Mareille! https://www. facebook.com/mariellegcastro

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ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

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Visual Artist

ER U ANI I

Celebrating Filipino artistry, passion, and cleverness.

They say that art is in the details. In this light, Eru Anii is nothing short of a wunderkind. His miniature paintings – some no larger than a 1 peso coin – testify of an attention to detail that can almost be described as “manic.” And on top of his propensity for intricacy, he uses mostly watercolor – a medium that is notoriously difficult and unpredictable.

To work with it on a full-sized canvas is taxing enough. But to use it for a painting the size of a button? Ay caramba.

MY ART I’m a watercolorist. I started using this medium about 4 years ago and I love the challenging properties of it.

Because this medium is unforgiving, the process usually involves a lot of mistake and making it work.

I define most of my pieces as call for introspection. A call for people to see the good things behind every experience and memory, whether good or bad. I make it a point to present my art as a form of therapy to people, to help them reevaluate their experiences and memories. Most recently

I launched a full collection of miniatures called “Buhay Pinoy Miniature Collection”. This was my first Pinoy-centric collection, which was inspired by tiny bits of Pinoy Memories. The idea was inspired by subconscious recollections. It’s always a fun when I am with my friends and we would reminisce about mundane things from our childhood, like Pritos ring, Rambo, and all the old simple games. I wanted to capture that sense of wonder and nostalgia.

MY PROCESS Most of my artworks start with introspection. For this particular collection, I first needed to introspect about my childhood and find connection with other people’s childhood. The painting process itself is extremely meticulous. I can only work during daytime for the best lighting possible and I need to have full concentration to make sure I render it flawlessly. I can’t even do it with music, otherwise my strokes becomes bigger. It’s no different from bigger paintings when it comes to technique and application. Painting each miniature could take 3 to 6 hours, depending on the subject.

MY JOURNEY I have been fond of art since I was 8 but I only took it up as a career in 2012 after a life-changing bout with depression. I tried to break into the industry by posting my work online. It took me a while to generate actual income, but the feedback that I got inspired me to do more. Early in 2014, I made my first sale, and people started asking me for commissions. On December of 2015, I launched my first solo exhibit entitled #EpisodeOne: Hypomania - a 28-piece collection inspired by the challenges I faced at the beginning of my art career. Immediately after that exhibit, I wanted to try to come from a more distinctly Pinoy perspective, but with a non-traditional approach. That’s when

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ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

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By>ERU ANII

Celebrating Filipino artistry, passion, and cleverness.

I first tried miniatures. In February of 2016, I launched my series of miniatures in a fair in Iloilo. It even surpassed the success of my first exhibit! Simultaneously, I posted it online and thankfully, people loved it.

Currently, I’m working on another solo exhibit to be shown within the year and a larger collection of miniature for last quarter. I want the new collection of miniatures to be even more nostalgic than the first.

TO MY FELLOW ARTISTS Being an artist takes a lot of dedication and patience. You can’t wish to be better without picking up a pencil. Keep on practicing, keep nourishing your ideas and put it on paper. An art career is rarely a straight path, but if you’re focused enough, you can end up with a beautiful picture.

Connect with Eru! http://www.facebook.com/eruanii

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MY PINOY LIFE IN > Living the dream, loving the world, learning new things everyday

My PINOY LIFE in I have been living in Escaldes, Engordany, Principado de Andorra for 22 years now. I moved here when I was only 8 years old, along with my sisters and my parents. It was my mother who moved here first, and after a while she brought us in one by one.

By> Arlene De Ocampo Bathan

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A

Andorra is a very small country located between the Pyrenees Mountains, which separate France and Spain. The country is called the Principality of Andorra, and is composed of seven parishes: Andorra La Vella, Les Escaldes, Sant Julia de Loria, La Massana, Ordino, Encamp and Canillo. The capital is Andorra La Vella, and they have their official flower which is the “Grandalla.”

The official language is Catalan. We do not have presidents and kings, but we have

a governor and his 28 official advisors.

The population is around 80,000 people.

Filipinos are probably 2% of all inhabitants.

Andorra is best known as a country of many mountains. If you look to the left and to the right you will only see mountains. But if it were not for the mountains, tourists probably would not come. Andorra is famous among neighboring countries due to its thermal waters and ski slopes. It is place full of stories, different cultures and winter sports. When the big snowfall comes, the landscape becomes completely white.

MY PINOY LIFE IN > Living the dream, loving the world, learning new things everyday

Historic center of Andorra La Vella, capital of Andorra.

View of El Pas de la Casa from a mountain - Andorra

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MY PINOY LIFE IN >

Bridge through Gran Valira river in Andorra la Vella.

Here, the weather is always changing.

From September to October is autumn, when we get abundant rains. During the winter season of November to February, the landscape is covered in snow and turns almost completely white. From March to May is spring when flowers begin to open up and you realize that summer is coming soon.

Summer is my favorite of the four seasons.

There are lots of beautiful places in Andorra.

For people who like to go walking in the mountains, there are many charming places and viewpoints where you can see the best views of the country. La Vall d’Incles is a good example. There you can take a leisurely trek and enjoy an amazing scenery.

You will also find lakes where you can fish, or even swim if you don’t mind the cold. We have many hiking trails in Ordino and even in Grau Roig – two of the most beautiful parishes in Andorra.

Old Stone bridge over beautiful river in summer Pyrenees. Andorra la Vella.

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We have a chapel that is located in Canillo, which is called The Sanctuary of the Virgin of Meritxell (the country’s patron. I believe it was restored in the 17th century and was destroyed in 1972. Then a sanctuary adjacent to a church chapel was built by the architect Ricard Bofill.

MY PINOY LIFE IN >

My Life

We have a quiet life here. The best thing about it is that I have my family with me. That’s what’s makes me enjoy living in a foreign country. I love spending time with my family. On days off, my husband, daughter, and I go visiting parks and places we have yet to discover. I also love reading scary books and romance and enjoy a good meal - whether Japanese, Italian or Mediterranean food.

There is a spa resort in Escaldes – Engordany called “Caldea.” It is the only place where you can enjoy the hot springs, and I love it! In fact, there are plenty of places to see and love in Andorra. If I have any cause for complaints, it’s that living in a country surrounded by mountains can sometimes feel a little claustrophobic.

My Community

There are about 800 Filipinos residing in Andorra. We make up about 2% of the population. We have a Filipino community organization called FILAND and the current president is also Batangueño. We always

Historic center of Andorra La Vella, capital of Andorra.

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MY PINOY LIFE IN > Living the dream, loving the world, learning new things everyday

Meritxell,Andorra : Sanctuary of Meritxell.

It is t he work of the Catalan architect Ricard Bofill and was opened in 1976, in the parish of Canillo.

celebrate national holidays like Christmas, and often organize raffles and activities aimed at helping those who are in need back home. Our last project was for the victims of typhoon Yolanda. Admittedly, I am a bit hesitant to join the activities, as my Tagalog is not as polished as I would like. Anyhow, I have my husband and I understand each other in a unique way by speaking a mixture of Tagalog and Spanish.

Filipinos have a good image in Andorra because they see us as hardworking people, confident, responsible and highly responsive to the needs of our employees.

The only difficulty we have is the language – since the official language here is Catalan and not Spanish.

My personal culture

I have a mixture of different cultures in me.

I love learning Filipino culture because I didn’t have an opportunity to be immersed in it. I like the freedom in this country, but

I also like the education of youth in the Philippines. I don’t define myself as Filipino or Andorranian. I guess, I’m ‘undefined.’

When I return to my home country, I love people-watching, especially their reactions, their words, their ways of dealing with adults and even how they treat you when you walk into a store and smile even when things go bad. It is completely different from here. It is complicated to implement that mindset here since cultures are quite opposite.

My Message

Being an OFW is not easy. The sacrifice of leaving your family behind not is in vain, however, as we did this for them to have a better future. We were born with the blood of a fighter! So let us fight for those dreams!

Andorra La Vella, Andorra :

Sculpture “The Nobility of Time” by Salvador Dali in Andorra la Vella.

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MY PINOY LIFE IN > Living the dream, loving the world, learning new things everyday

Balneary of Caldea in Escaldes, Andorra. Caldea is Europe’s largest health spa designed by the architect Jean-Michel Ruols in 1994.

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What to do yani? K. Here.

ILLUSTRADO CALENDAR

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Here are our list of things to do, places to go, and events to attend…

2016

JUNE

Get the best produce at the Ripe Summer Market 7 May - 29 October 2016 Dubai’s best organic produce are ripe for the taking at Ripe Summer Market!

Spend your Saturday’s picking the best ingredients at Ripe’s indoor market at Times Square Center, Sheikh Zayed Road.

Photo credit: ripeme.com

Spark your child’s inner Da Vinci at DUCTAC’s Art Camp!

26 June - 04 August 2016 Empower your kids’ imagination and set them on the road towards creative genius at DUCTAC’s Art Camp for summer 2016! The program offers a well-rounded learning experience, where kids can learn the basics of art history and get their hands dirty recreating the works of famous painter.

Photo credit: godubai.com

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Learn life’s winning points with Francis Kong!

July 8 2016 Francis Kong has been a moving force in the field of motivation, inspiration, leadership and excellence in the Philippines. He is one of the most respected business speakers in the country and earns the distinction as being one of the recipients for 2014 The Outstanding Filipino (TOFIL) Awards; he is also an award winning media personality and best-selling author who has been a positive impact to hundreds of thousands of Filipinos.

Photo credit: Money Talks and Innovate Create Events

Get your game on at the Football Fanfest Dubai 2016 June 10 – July 10 2016 Be one with the city’s legions of football fans at the Football Fanfest Dubai 2016 – Dubai’s largest indoor game-viewing venue. With massive screens, raffle draws, and foods galore, you are sure to experience a spectacle of sports that you will never forget!

Photo credit: http://footballfanfestdxb. com/

Experience history at the Hareem Al Sultan Exhibition 01 March - 31 December 2016 The Ottoman Era is often remembered as a time of great opulence and cultural upheaval. Experience the wonder of this bygone age at the Hareem Al Sultan exhibition at the City Walk. See original décor, jewelry, and costumes. Smell the authentic palatial aromas, and taste special sherbets and sweets.

Photo credit: citywalk.ae/Play/HareemAl-Sultan

SASSY GIRL GUIDE

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Sizzling sisterly advice from one fierce Filipina

5 Best Comebacks When Someone Calls You FAT! B y > B y Tr a c y L e y

Y

You know how it is. You’re having a beautiful day, wearing your favorite outfit, feeling particularly great about yourself, face is on fleek as per standard. You just had a sumptuous breakfast, and you came out of the house full of zest and enthusiasm, thinking you are the King or Queen of the World. And then you come across someone you haven’t seen in months, and before she could even say hi, she says, “Uy! Antaba mo!”

BAM! Day ruined.

Why oh why do some people think that commenting on one’s weight is an acceptable form of greeting? We may never know. And honestly, it might not be worth knowing anymore. People will be people. You can’t control what people will say, but you can control how you can feel about it, and how you react. Suffice it to say, declaring an all-out war right then and there might not be a good option, so in lieu of going ballistic, here are some good comebacks when someone calls you fat:

“Thank you! Now how does that make you feel?”

Don’t go on the defensive. Instead, go on the diplomatic offensive. Ask the other person how your weight gain makes them

feel. Make the conversation about them, not you. Hopefully, with this reverse psychology tactic, the person will notice that what they started the engagement on the wrong foot.

Well, sana. Kung hindi, you might want to rethink your choice of acquaintances.

“I know right? Madami kasi akong pambiling pagkain.”

Never feel sorry for enjoying your food!

That is such a lame way to live. Eat what you love, and offer no apologies. Inggit lang ng iba, hindi nila afford ang diet mo! Use the famous hashtag #blessed when you post your foodie shot online. Make it known that you are a hearty eater. Lets admit it: we all like to eat!

“Hiyang ako eh, masarap kasi mag luto partner ko.”

Count yourself lucky when your partner knows their way around the kitchen. Who wouldn’t want someone like that? It’s like having your own personal chef. If the choice came down to having a rocking bod and enjoying life with the person you love, choose the latter. Everyone should understand this. And if they don’t, eh problema na nila yun.

cake and ice cream is undeniable. So yes child, eat the damn cake. My fave cake flavor is Red Velvet, whats yours?

“Yes I did gain weight. It is my body though, so ill do whatever pleases me” This is arguably the best reply, as nothing beats honesty. There are a lot of insensitive social trainwrecks out there who have nothing better to do than to criticize your weight gain. Accept this, and take the high road. Take the criticism, but do not feel like you have to justify what you choose to do with your body. You don’t. It’s your life. It’s your choice. You do you.

In my experience, habit na ng karamihan ang pagsita ng katabaan. I don’t get it. I for one am a regular victim of this famous line and I am just so over it. I don’t condone unhealthy eating at all. Much can be said about eating in moderation, but at the end of the day, it is still up to that individual to make life changes. For those who are constantly getting bullied about their weight gain, the best revenge is to start working out and eat a balanced diet.

And when all else fails, just be happy. Love the life you live, in the skin you are in.

“Life is too short not to eat the damn ice cream and cake.”

I for one am guilty about this. My love for

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ENTERTAINMENT

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Because there’s no business like showbusiness. Boom panes!

By> Kristine Abante

Mercedes Cabral Wins over Kuwaiti TV

Indie cinema favorite Mercedes Cabral makes waves in the Middle East this Ramadan as she stars in a Kuwaiti soap opera entitled “Saq Al Bamboo” (The

Bamboo Stalk). Produced by Sabbah Pictures, the show airs on Al-Rai TV and MBC Drama in Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, Dubai in United Arab Emirates, and other parts of the Middle East. On the series, Mercedes plays the role of Josephine, a woman who left her poor family in the Philippines to work as a maid in Kuwait. She then falls in love with her employer’s son and is later left to raise a child on her own as her husband’s family disapprove of her. Based on the novel of the same title by journalist Saud Alsanousi, which earned the 2013 International Prize for Arab Fiction, the series was shot in Dubai although the story

is set in Kuwait.

Audiences across the gulf have been enthralled by Cabral’s beauty and performance, with a lot of them posting their admiration for the 29-year old actress on social media. Viewers have been quoted prasing her as a “Marvelous actor”, while others commented on her striking good looks, with one Kuwaiti netizen going as far as to compare her to American supermodel Gigi Hadid.

Photo : Saq Al Bamboo

Pinoy Electronica duo WYWY featured on Sound Gaarden WYWY, the electro-pop duo composed of husband and wife tandem of X and Mckie Alvarez is the current toast of Dubai’s Independent music scene as their unique playful electronica harmonies finds its way to the spotlight. Featured on the latest episode of Sound Gaarden’s #DiscoverLocal series, a platform for the city’s upcoming local acts, WYWY performed their debut single “Disconnection” live at the Jam Jar, a community art space in Dubai. Prior to forming WYWY, a name inspired by the The Beatles song “Within You, Without You, both X and Mckie are members

of the electro dream pop band Parallel Soundsystem which has played at several venues across the Middle East.

X is also one of the mentors of the nonprofit organization –Rock Camp for Girls, while Mckie is a DJ/producer of dub reggae known as Maddstar Sounds. Watch out for WYWYs soon-to-be released debut EP “You Are Blessed”. For more info, follow them on : https://www.facebook.com/ withinyouwithoutyou.music/ Photo credit supplied by X Alvarez

The Dawn Reunites with Original Members In a surprise announcement on his Facebook page, Pinoy Rock icon Jett Pangan recently revealed a major line-up change for The Dawn, the band he has been fronting for the last 30 years.

Two ex-Dawn musicians, legendary guitarist Francis Reyes and bass player Caloy Balcells will be rejoining the band with as bass player and former Eraserheads member Buddy Zabala leaves the line up.

Original drummer JB Leonor and guitarist Rommel “Sancho” Sanchez, who joined in 2014, both remain with the band.

Before making the “big reveal,” Pangan

waxed poetic and recalled his original vision for The Dawn. “When The Dawn started out, I was the kid who held idealistic fantasies of what a band should be. One of those thoughts was that we were gonna be like U2 or Aerosmith where band members will barely or never change, that—come hell or high water—the same guys will eventually ride into the sunset,” he posted. “[Thirty] years later, we know better. Reality doesn’t always support our dreams and desires.

This band has seen more than its fair share of members walking in and out of the door, and for varying reasons.”

Photo : Alco Guerrero

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ILLUSTRADO STUFF >

SMARTSHAKE Don’t think, “Oh no, not another tumbler.” This one isn’t for your coffee. This is for the committed health enthusiasts who know that managing protein intake is top prio.

With SmartShake, you get a vessel for mixing up your protein drink, an extra container for your work-out powders, plus another container for your pills supps – all in one stackable unit. Don’t be caught shaking without it.

FITBIT Of course you don’t need an activity tracker to lose weight, but in the battle against the bulge, every bit of help counts. Fitbit allows you to monitor key performance metrics such as calories burned, distance travelled, and heart rate, giving you a better of understanding of where you are and how far you still have to go in your fitness journey. Basically, it’s fitness for nerds - and as a general life rule, anything that is designed for nerds is extra-awesome.

MICRO GREENS Want to organically grow your own food but do not have a space for an urban garden?

You have options, dear urban farmer, and they come in the form of micro greens. In a container as small as a square foot, you can grow your own favorite mini-salad greens that you can later snip off and consume at will. Just remember to snip them off and wash them well first, and not just eat them off the plant box. You are not a goat.

Photo: steamykitchen.com

Money can’t buy happiness, but admit it - sometimes you just gotta have your stuff! Get a load of these interesting, very Illustrado sundry. Can’t live without ‘em!

BURPEES The Renaissance Man of fitness routines! If you must only perfect one functional exercise, let it be the burpee. Burpees are good for everything. Requiring no equipment whatsoever, burpees make you stronger, improve your flexibility, and bolster your cardiovascular health. Very few other exercises can obliterate calories like one minute of well-executed burpees. You can do it anywhere and add it onto any workout program. You can even do it now. No, seriously. Put the magazine down for a sec, and do a burpee. You’ll thank us for it.

Photo: bing.com

PROTEIN BREAD

BY MODERN BAKERY We at #TeamIllustrado are bound by our shared commitment towards championing the image of overseas Filipinos – and our love for Modern Bakery’s Protein Bread.

Firstly, it’s loaded with whole grains and fiber. Secondly, it just really tastes good.

Whereas other “healthy” breads can taste like punishment, Modern Bakery’s Protein Bread is legit delicious. Flavorful, texture-y, and a real pleasure to eat. Pinapakyaw namin sa tindahan ‘to!

Photo: choithrams.com

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COMMUNITY >

Kumer-Solo Photo Exhibit at the PCG Dubai and Northern Emirates

On the occasion of the 118th Philippine Independence Day, the Philippine Consulate General of Dubai and the Northern Emirates in cooperation with the Filipino Ladies of Dubai, for the first time ever, inaugurated a photo exhibit by Dubai-based commercial photographer Chris Calumberan. Entitled “Kumer-Solo in the Eyes of Chris Calumberan” – the exhibit showcased images with the theme “Filipino Soaring High”

depicting the dedication, determination, and resilience of Filipinos despite adversity.

The exhibit was opened by Consul General Paul Raymund Cortes on the 12th of June at the PCG Rizal Hall.

Speaking on the significance of such projects for the Filipino community, Consul General Cortes shared that the intention behind creative projects such as Kumer-Solo is “to present the Consulate not only as the last ray of hope for our nationals in distress or for those needing resolutions to their pressing issues, but as the first measure of hope for budding artist who would like to present and exhibit their works to the UAE public.”

The opening ceremony was attended by Madame Yasmine Balajadia-Cortes, Head of Filipino Ladies of Dubai, Consul Ferdie Flores, Consul Ryan Pondoc, as well as sponsors LBC.

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COMMUNITY >

PH-UAE Ties highlighted at the 118th Independence Day in Abu Dhabi

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In commemoration of the 118th Anniversary of the Proclamation of the Philippine Independence, the Philippine Embassy in Abu Dhabi highlighted political and economic gains of the Philippines in recent years, and the strong bilateral ties between the Philippines and the United Arab Emirates during the Embassy’s diplomatic reception on June 01 at the Dar El Istiqbal (Grand Ballroom), Intercontinental Abu Dhabi.

“As we reflect on the value of our freedom, we remain committed in our efforts to preservation of peace and promoting the well-being and solidarity of our country and people,” said Ambassador Constancio

R. Vingno, Jr. The Ambassador also noted the strong ties between the Philippines and the UAE as both sides celebrate the 36th anniversary of bilateral ties, which was established in June 1980. “Both the Philippines and the UAE are experiencing strong economic growth in their respective regions. We also share the same dream for our countrymen: an inclusive and progressive nation. We are also one in rejecting extremist ideologies. Furthermore, both our countries have had outstanding gains in the area of competitiveness, human rights and gender equality.”

His Excellency Khalid Ghanem Al Ghaith, Assistant Minister for Economic Affairs, Ministry of Foreign Affairs and International

Cooperation (MOFAIC) represented the UAE leadership during the event. More than 300 attended including members of the diplomatic corps, leaders of the Filipino community, personalities from the business sector and the media also attended the event.

The event also included an art exhibition which showcased the talents of select Filipino artists and designers in painting, photography, jewelry and bag design. They include Xyza Cruz Bacani, Rico Tompong, Esmi Pangilinan, Susan Villanueva – De Guzman, Dee Dipon. Patricia Zyrinn De Guzman and Anna Rubio.

MONEY

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Make money. Maintain that money. Money pa more!

When should I start saving up for retirement?

By> Francisco J. Colayco

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From the moment you have any kind of income, you should already be saving for your retirement. Unfortunately, this is the last thought of any young person in his first job.

This idea is not taught in any school when it is so important, especially now that there are so many challenges facing the aging population.

There are government agencies in charge of providing retirement pay like the Social Security System (SSS) for private individuals or the Government Service Insurance System (GSIS) for government employees. However, the amounts you could receive are dependent on how long you actually work and remit regular payments. You have to keep good records of proof of your monthly remittances, as it is difficult to apply for retirement without these. Also, as part of your risk management, you should not depend solely on these government agencies for your retirement.

I cannot overemphasize your obligation to grow wealth over your lifetime. You need to build your own wealth first to

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secure your future as well as to share your bounty with your loved ones. The formula is simple: Raise Capital. Go for long-term growth. Secure cash flow. For most, raising capital comes from savings. I cannot stop repeating the principle income minus savings equals expenses. When you set aside a part of your income, ideally 20% before spending for your regular needs, you will have available funds for you to invest.

A part of this amount can be targeted for your retirement. You need to compute how much that amount will be. There is a formula that you can get from our website www.colaycofoundation.com.

Identify the monthly amount that you will need to set aside to reach the amount you will need for retirement. When you are young, you will be surprised at how small that amount could be. Time is your biggest ally. The longer the time you keep your money invested, the lower the risk, the higher the returns. The trick is to get the right estimate of what you need when you retire, compute what you have to set aside, save regularly and invest correctly. In no time, you will be pleasantly surprised with what you already have in your retirement fund. Make use of the

power of compounding. the longer the investment horizon, the greater the power of compounding works for you. Once you have built sufficient resources, you can secure regular cash flow through prudent investments.

As long as you have identified the amount for retirement savings, you can already allocate all the other amounts for saving for your car, your home, and education of your children. Perhaps, you will think that those are more important than your retirement. In the short term, you are right. You need to put aside more money for those goals. But if you start young, believe me, you will only set a very small amount for your retirement so do it even if you don’t find it so important. As you grow older, you will have to put aside a bigger and bigger amount.

Very few can just keep on saving and investing their money all their life without some enjoyment. Enjoyment is especially needed to reward yourself when you have done well in your investments. If you want to enjoy a little and not just save all the extra savings, then, by all means do so.

Balance is always the key to a happy life.

LAW

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Get right with the rules. Here’s how.

DON’T BE CLUELESS ABOUT CREDIT By> Barney Almazar, Esq.

Swipe dito, swipe doon! Feeling swanky with your fancy platinum credit card? Get over the dream, kabayan. There’s more to managing your credit than making room for it in your designer wallet. Let the People’s Lawyer, Barney Almazar guide you. Quick hint: credit ain’t cash!

S

So you’ve done your binge shopping, hit the malls for that new iPhone or designer purse, but before you think about taking out that credit card and swiping it for another purchase, read Article 401 of the UAE Penal code first: “A punishment of confinement of one month to three years, or a fine of a minimum of AED1,000 shall be inflicted on any person who, in bad faith draws a cheque with no existing or drawable provision.”

When you applied for your credit card, you have agreed to the terms and conditions of the bank which you probably did not read at all. In gist, the fine print in the contract obliges you to pay all your purchases plus any interest, late charge, over limit penalty, annual membership fee and other applicable bank charges. You have authorized the bank to cash your security cheque should you default on your payment. If your cheque bounced, in the eyes of law, you have committed a crime.

The key to maximizing the benefit of credit is paying all your purchases in full on the due date. If you cannot afford to make the full payment, strive to regularly pay more than just the minimum and do not use the card further until you are able to clear your balance. Adding purchases on top of your card balance will only make your interest payments bigger. Credit card issuers, just like any other financial institutions are not charity. They earn form the interest and bank charges you pay for using their money. The longer time it takes you to pay back, the more you lose in interest payments. But what should you do when you overspend and cannot manage your bills? You need to get a pair of scissors, cut up your card and call the bank to arrange for a payment structure. You may negotiate a payment holiday during a period of unemployment, to extend the term of repayment or reduce the monthly payments. Once you make the settlement, you should stick to the agreed payment terms. It is always better to settle out of court.

It is a common notion that serving the prison term or paying the fine imposed for bounced cheque will erase one’s debts.

Wrong! The prison term or fine (is the penalty for the criminal act of issuing a worthless cheque. Banks are interested in getting back their money from the defaulter. Banks will not earn anything when the cardholder pays the fine or is imprisoned. To collect the amount owed, banks will subsequently file a post-jail civil case for collection pursuant to Articles 246 and 710 of the UAE Civil Code obliging the debtor to pay his creditor as per the terms of the loan contract.

The civil case will be assigned to an execution judge who would compel the defaulter to pay up the cheque or risk being jailed again. At this point, banks are less likely to enter into a settlement. Based on experience, most banks demand full payment together with damages and cost of suit from the jailed cardholder.

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RIGHT NOW PHILIPPINES

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Ti mel y i s s ue s ( or n on -i s s ue s ) th a t m a tte r a n d m a k e n o is e !

B y > E x c e l V. D y q u i a n g c o - M a n i l a

The Death of a Legend

Cavs versus Warriors No doubt that Filipinos can’t stop raving and playing basketball. Many watch it to the core, even games that showcase other races’ ability and uncanny to shoot the hoops. When the Golden State Warrior and the Cleveland Cavaliers faced off squarely in the NBA Finals, the Pinoys were glued to the tube. Who is set to win? To recap, Game 1 had the Golden State Warrior outshine the Cleveland Cavaliers with a score of 104-89. Game 2 fielded almost the same results with the Golden State at 110 and Cleveland at 77. Game 3 became a reversal of fortune as the Cavs beat the Golden State with a score of 120-90. Game 4, as of this writing, is still ongoing and the rest is yet to be seen.

The news has been so widespread that not only was the game the highlight but so were other situations as well. In fact a parody of a young – yes, a baby – Stephen Curry of Golden State and Lebron James of Cavaliers being interviewed by the media made the rounds.

An MMA Fight

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The greatest boxing fighter of all time, Muhammad Ali, was recently laid to rest. A rousing tribute at his memorial service at his home town at Louisville, Kentucky was conducted and many are still in tears and in shock of his death, Filipinos included. Mike Tyson and different religious denominations attended the funeral. Former US President Bill Cinton described the boxing legend as a “free man of faith”. He said in his own words, “I think he decided very young to

write his own life story. I think he decided that he would not be ever disempowered.”

According to CNN, the 74-year old Ali died of “septic shock due to unspecified natural causes.” He has been battling Parkinson’s disease for three decades before his death.

Incidentally, Ali Mall in Cubao, Quezon City was named after him – in honor of the greatest boxing legend of all time.

Mainstream actor Baron Geisler and independent actor Kiko Matos settled their beef inside the ring at the mixed martial arts cage at Universal Reality Combat Championship (URCC) at the Valkyrie at The Palace in Taguig City.

URCC founder Alvin Aguilar said that the cage was the proper venue for the two to iron out their differences.

He said, “In the URCC, we make sure that all street fights get settled inside the URCC cage,” Aguilar said.

The match ended in a draw.

The Philippine-based MMA company labelled the fight as a “special exhibition” as the two actors drew an explosive conclusion to a feud that started in a bar in Quezon City. Baron claimed that Kiko was sending inappropriate signals to the female bartender while Kiko denied the allegations.

THE PRACTICING

MISIS >

Kitchen advise for the curious cook!

Skills Muna Bago Feels “Ang dumi dumi naman ng kalan! Ano? Hindi ka marunong mag-adobo?

Pano ka mag-aasawa niyan? Naku, anak!”

By> Rosan Katlea Reodica

TUNA CHICKPEA PALAMANSALAD

A-not- so-salad salad, because you hate the feeling of gnawing on too much leaves but want to know you ate good stuff.

“Wow, diet ka?” a line that teeters on encouragement, disbelief and insult, second in ranking to “Tumaba/pumayat ka ah!” Don’t you find it ironic that Philippine culture, one that is all about having women learning the basics of domestication – making a home and being able to put good, delectable straight-from-your-grandma’sheritage type of food on the table – also has ingrained in us the nonchalance on the repercussions of casual body shaming?

After publishing my cookbook, learning a hundred recipes, coming home to family got me a mixture of congratulations and “Ayan, kakaluto mo, napakataba mo na!”

Lucky for me, I knew I went overboard my healthy weight. But more importantly, I understand that my happiness should not and will not rely on people’s opinions of my body. Therein lies the beauty of homecooking: you learn what works for you, what weight you will be most confident in, and what type of food balances eating healthily and eating for fitness. Eating for fitness is a great, scientific discipline, but we can all start with eating the healthy stuff first before counting those macros, calories and whatnot. The following is a dish that is part of this new journey I have with myself, eliminating my fondness for saturated fat and food coma after-feels. Try this healthy, savory and very filling meal if you’re on the way to happy and healthy self-nourishment as well.

DEGREE OF DIFFICULTY: You won’t even need to turn on your stove for this! Stop making excuses!

COUNTER: Open two cans of tuna chunks (in water/ brine is best). 2 cups of chickpeas. Dice half a head of red onion. Tear and chop 2 tablespoons of mint leaves and half a cup of fresh parsley. Slice one cup of those cute cherry tomatoes. Add in some chopped, green bell pepper. Mix and toss everything in a big bowl and kick things up with sea salt, black pepper, paprika and lime juice.

Make sure all ingredients meet each other well so that a spoonful of this has all the flavors (crunch, zest and mush) meet your tongue nicely. Stuff it in some protein or brown wheat wrap and add in some light feta cheese crumbles if your heart desires.

SKILLS UNLOCKED: Knowing that sometimes, beating hunger doesn’t need the grueling hot plate heat.

BONUS: 5 servings. If you really wanna know? A serving is only 148 calories! But don’t go all excited and make it as a dip for your tortilla chips! (I’m pretty sure that’ll be awesome though!)

The Practicing Misis Cookbook [No Fiancé Required, Guaranteed Gayuma-Free Recipes] - Psicom Publishing Inc., 2016.

Available in the Philippines in National Bookstore, Fully Booked and other leading bookstores nationwide. Social Media: @practicingmisis | #practicingmisis | #lukaretcooking

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ADVERTORIAL >

THE FARM AT SAN BENITO: NURTURE YOURSELF FROM WITHIN

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We all seek sanctuary to find peace, to heal, and achieve inner balance. At The Farm at San Benito, we give you the opportunity to make a positive change in your life and discover your personal haven in the heart of paradise.

This award-winning, luxury wellness escape is set on over 50-hectare coconut plantation in a lush, natural backdrop.

Coupled with fresh air and verdant surroundings, guests are sure to find their own piece of paradise where they can begin their journey to a healthier lifestyle.

Retreats at The Farm at San Benito are complete paths to wellness combining healing and rejuvenating treatments, organic vegan cuisine, physical fitness activities, inner balance, and nature’s incomparable beauty.

WELLNESS RETREATS This year, The Farm introduces six new retreat programs for those who wish to bring out their more radiant self. Each retreat is tailored to help guests achieve their desired fitness and wellness goals, offering holistic wellness experience, stress management, anti-aging, weight management, detox, and fitness. Retreats start at 7-night stays, with options for 14 and 21-night programs to make the most out of the experience. The longer duration,

however, allow the mind, body, and spirit to transition into a more holistic lifestyle.

HEALING SANCTUARY SPA TREATMENTS AND INTEGRATED MEDICAL SERVICES

The Farm’s signature medical offerings are rooted in natural healing principles, strengthened by conventional practices by licensed medical doctors.

The Healing Sanctuary, on the other hand, offers an extensive menu of signature Filipino, Asian, and European massages, scrubs and treatments. Eco-friendly, 100% natural and organic products are made fresh for each treatment. Guests’ spa treatment experience further reinforces their ability to overcome stress and feel younger and healthier after their stay.

ORGANIC VEGAN CUISINE True to The Farm’s farm-to-table philosophy, Alive! adjusts its menu to what is bountiful and in-season during each harvest. Luscious vegan meals offer delicious counterpoints to the holistic retreats, which invigorates and nurtures the body during their stay.

To pair with every dish, a menu of organic juices and smoothies is also available – including a special menu of organic wines and spirits that can serve as perfect

partners to any vegan fare.

LUXURY ACCOMMODATIONS Wellness also comes with luxury at The Farm at San Benito through its casually, elegant villas. Each villa is furnished with upscale amenities giving it a seamless balance of comfort and class – perfect for a well-deserved luxurious retreat.

Accommodations at The Farm vary in size, style, and structure giving it a sense of exclusivity and designed to suit a guest’s wellness needs. The Garden Glass Villa and Palmera Glass Villas are The Farm’s latest additions to its luxe selection of modern comforts.

With the beauty of The Farm’s natural surroundings, refreshing retreats, luscious and nourishing cuisine, and upscale comforts, a stay at The Farm is indeed worthwhile and rewarding. It is the best sanctuary for those who desire to recharge and achieve better harmony in life. After all, with wellness comes a more positive outlook in life.

Interested in learning more about The Farm at San Benito and its awardwinning services? Simply visit http:// www.thefarmatsanbenito.com. For direct inquiries, call (+632) 884-8074 or email: reservations@thefarm.com.ph / info@ thefarm.com.ph illustrado go>55

ONLI IN DA PILIPINS

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Filipinisms. Sometimes awesome. Sometimes facepalm.

We Know What You Do For Summer B y > A b y Ya p

You hide the body. Yours, of course (not unless you’re Dexter or Norman, then that would be another body, er, story).

Whether you admit it or not, we’ll always know what you do every summer just to look and feel sexy on the beach.

No judgment here, buddy. We’re in the same boat. Let’s face it: not everyone is blessed to have beach body genes—not when you’ve been programmed to eat sinangag and longganisa for breakfast, rice and any oily dish for lunch and dinner, and rice cakes for merienda. We’re bound to carry excess baggage aka bilbil anywhere we go, even to Bora.

Apply Fashion Fixes But since it’s more fun to eat in the Philippines with the lechon, sisig, and chicharon around, not everyone wants to be a loser. If we can’t be in good shape, the heck with being sexy! Round is a shape, too, and therefore we can be well-rounded anyway we want. Let’s just have fashion work its magic, abracadabra!

But we can still get rid of the fat—for good or for Facebook. Game!

Bring out your black one-piece bathing suit. Not only can it provide you an air of mystery, it can also make you look slimmer.

Never mind if it seems only an illusion; no one can tell since they’re all busy enjoying the beach. If you think you’re cheerier than the Addams Family, though, wear brown, blue, beige, or white as long as it’s a onecolor outfit.

Be the Biggest Loser There’s a reason why the Lenten season occurs during summer. It’s to help you prepare to walk down the tough road to achieving the body that will squeeze into your newly bought bikinis. (So what if it’s two sizes too small? Miracles can happen.)

You already abstained from meat on five Fridays and fasted during the entire Holy Week. That should be enough practice for when you go on a real diet with proper exercise, e.g. climbing 30 floors.

Yes, the tough road to becoming sexy is apparently endless. Turn away from your kain-kargador ways and stick to a diet that will work for you, i.e. what won’t make you see stars on a sunny morning and faint like no one’s watching. Go Cohen, eat the right kind of food based on your blood type, and lose P50,000+ plus some pounds. Or, pick Paleo and devour only protein, fiber, nuts, and berries like a caveman. You can also limit yourself to raw fruits and veggies or water and juice, or grow crazy and thin counting calories, or avoid carbs and sweets like sin forever.

If you cheat on your diet, a whip may come in handy. Think penitensya. illustrado go>56

Too plain? Then choose something with vertical or diagonal stripes—the thinner, the better—to create an elongating effect.

Here’s a tip: find an #OOTD that has quite interesting details like a plunging neckline or a low back. For sure, no one would care about your big belly or titanic thighs because they’ll be busy gawking at something else.

If you insist on sporting the skimpiest two-piece, though, we won’t stop you.

Just bring a malong to cover what must be invisible to the eye.

Learn Photo Poses So what if you’re svelte in person when you’re still stout in pictures? Ouch.

Regardless of how much it hurts (or sounds stupid), the truth is that Facebook is the current reality. If they see you fat on FB, then you must be fatso in real life even you’re already starving yourself to death.

The key to appear slender in photos is body angling. Find your good side. Face the camera slightly sideways. Keep your arms away from your body. Push your chin out a bit or ask the photographer nicely to take the shot from above.

It also pays to use some common sense.

Avoid being the closest person to the camera. This usually happens when you’re seated at either end of a dining table. Leave your third serving of morcon and move away from the photographer. Also stand next to people bigger than you, so you’ll appear small. And if you need to hide the bulge, conceal it with your bag or your girlfriend/boyfriend’s arm/s.

There, you should be able to come up with Facebook-worthy cover photos without anyone commenting about your coca cola bottle-shaped, albeit 1.5 liter-sized, body and triple chin.

Turn to Technology Tricks Frustrated that nobody seems to perfectly capture you on cam despite being 100 pounds less this summer? Buy your very own selfie pod and take control of your pictures anytime, anywhere!

With this monopod, the most significant invention since fisheye lens, you’ll never have a weary arm or blurred selfie shots ever again. Plus, you won’t annoy anyone even if you get shutter happy taking photos of yourself at every angle while doing the peace sign and duck lips until you accomplish the #sexypicoftheday. Finally.

If all else fails, there’s always Adobe Photoshop to erase all extras.

ANNIE B CHRONICLES

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Th e ad v e n tur e s a n d mi s ad ve n tu re s o f a ‘ n o t s o a ve ra g e ’ P in a y tr y i n g to ma ke i t i n th e c o s m o po lita n c ity o f Du b a i

“BL OODY BLIND D AT E”

After Ashton, my DOM Pinoy date never returned my phone calls, text messages and emails after our romantic Eyeball – Ang labo mo, Ashton! Sorry ka na lang…It’s not my loose, it’s your lost!!! – my boss set me up in a blind date. This time with a British guy – yes. White leghorn na itu – Dizzizit!!!!

So the blind date was all set – 8pm at the Noodle House, Emirates Towers. I take it as a good signs that he likes Asian foodthat’s already 100 pogi points for trying to please me. After a night of practicing my British accent, I got all dressed up and went to the Emirates Towers to meet my blind date. When I arrive at the Noodle House, there he was, tall, very white. He is maybe I think around 50 years old. I am not bothered by his age – I like mature men – they are more stable in life you know.

“Eh-nnie? Eh-nnie Batow-bah-lo-nnie is that you. How’ya doing, Luv?” “Oh, I’m bloody fine thank you and you – how bloody are you?”

“I’m starving! Why don’t we get to our seats and have dinner now? We’re just right on schedule…(British pronounciation)” While ordering our food, I noticed they don’t have Palabok and Lomi and even Bihon –what kind of Noodle House is this?

Even Spaghetti they don’t have!!! Eh diba puro noodles ang mga yun? Haayyy….

Cooper ordered Nasi Goreng.

thought of a way to make him feel thank you-ed. “Come, I’ll bloody take you to a real noodle house!” I suggested.

So we got into his car – a Land Rovers 4x4, sey mo? And I gave him direction towards Deira. Minutes later, we arrived at – wherelse – but the pride of the Philippine’s fine dining here in Dubai – Chowking!!!!

“My favorite dish!” He said. “I spent almost twenty years all around Southeast Asia, ya’know? I’ve already been to Hongkong, China, Ja-pen, K-ree-yeh, Viet-num, Cum-bow-dyah, Tay-lend, Boh-lee, and of course, Mah-nee-luh…” Cooper said.

“Oh, I’ve also been to Hongkong…for a stopover!!!” Akala nya sya lang ang well traveled noh? Pasiklaban ko din nga.

So while the kabayans stared at us – Inggit lang sila ako may date na puti. Eh ano kung para akong tarsier sa tindi ng kapit ko sa date ko? – we had a grand time feasting on Pancit Canton Chopseuy, Fried Tilapia, Kare-kare and my ever favorites – Buchi and Chicharap!

“Are you ow-kay, Luv?” Cooper asked.

However, as I continued to tell Cooper the story of my life while eating Chopseuy and Kare-kare, I noticed that he wasn’t paying attention – he just kept looking at my mouth. Maybe I’m so kissable lips?

Hindi ba sya makapag hintay? After eating, I thought we will still be bar-hopping but he said he will have to take a rain check. I told him no need to check the rain because it doesn’t rain in Dubai. But he decided to call it a night. He drove me home and even before I could give him a goodnight kiss, he quickly ran away in his 4x4. Bakeet???

“To tell you the truth, no…I don’t like the food here. My food is very spicy. I might paint if I continue to finish this…” I complained to him.

Since Cooper is very understanding. I

All this time, I kept in thinking, “what went wrong?” Was I too hot? Was I too beautiful for him? I thought Dizzizit na talaga – but he never returned any of my calls and texts.

Men – lulu at lili (lulubog at lilitaw).

Anyway, I thought Nasi Goreng will be something special – eh hallerrr, Tapsilog lang pala yun! As for me, I got Broccoli with Oyster Sauce as appetizer – para pa-girl – and Type Pad Noodles. I’m so hungry I quickly finished my broccoli. But again, I got disappointed – my noodles were very spicy! My armpits began to sweat – minus 50 points itu!

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Starting “Oven” Again By> Rian Miranda-KSA

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If there’s such a thing as “writer’s block”, then you can say that I went through a “baker’s block”. Despite baking being my number one passion, I have barely spent time in the kitchen or baked a cake for the past 2-3 years. But lately, I just felt a strong urge to go back.

For months I have been searching for fresh inspirations that will entice me to create something new. I signed up for a couple of online recipe newsletters but I found it difficult to browse everything, while I’m also trying to get other things done besides pursuing my passion for food. Don’t get me wrong; I love my current job (I believe the “universe conspired” for me to be in it). I’m grateful for the opportunity to work with business moguls who are brilliant in running an empire and I learn a lot from

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them. It helps me to keep my service and ethics in check.

My interest in baking has been rekindled recently after a conversation with one of the best pastry chefs of today; and I’m deeply humbled for that brief opportunity.

I also realized then that I would always be busy, and that my schedule will always be swamped. So, I need 2 T’s to get back on track: Tools and Time.

The first is quite manageable to acquire but the latter would be challenging. Some would say, “Get rid of your job and do what you love”, but I believe I just need to work on my passion in between because I also like what I do as an admin professional. I simply need to find balance and manage my time so I can be as dedicated to baking.

I don’t need to drop other things or people

that don’t inspire me. Our purpose in life is to love, even those who are unlovable.

The only way to fulfill this is to balance the amount of time we spend with the inspiring and uninspiring. When we balance, we will know real peace and happiness.

As a close friend said, “There’s no point in holding anything back since we’re all going to end up under the soil one day. So just do what you can to work on your dreams, even if you keep pausing in between, because what matters most is you get it done.”

Follow Rian Miranda: http://raeviews.wix. com/main Instagram: msrianmiranda, Youtube: www. youtube.com/rianmiranda

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