Sorrento Bowling Club Magazine Issue 63 December 2015

Sorrento Bowling Club Christmas Newsletter (Including Darts and Croquet) “May your troubles be less, may your

blessings be more, and may nothing but happiness come through your door�

Number 63 December 2015

P.R. Webb & Co. offer quality workmanship and reliable service. Our business is owner operated so we ensure a high level of customer satisfaction. We are registered and insured.

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Contents Some notes from your Editors From the President Our 39th Opening Day: 27 September 2015 Opening Day Blessing Sex Change Around Our Club Around Our Club - continued Male Logic: Critical Thinking at its Best!

Believe In Yourself A Function of Affluence Types of Bowls Report from the Office Manager Nine facts to remember as you grow older Report from the Sponsorship Committee Men’s Match Committee Report Dash for Cash Winners Ladies Match Committee Report Umpires’ Corner: Bowls Practice Reunions Croquet Corner News Men’s Pennant News Ladies Pennant News Greens and Grounds Darts Club Report Dynamics of the Game of Bowls 2015 Ladies Fashion Parade Geoff Murray’s Trip to Turkey Another “Jan and Friends Tour” Happiness Letters to the Editor In Memorium: Jock Dale 1926-2015 Tribute to Cal O’Donnell The “Mystery” of the “Missing” Jack “What happens in Kalgoorlie stays in Kalgoorlie” Members Celebrating Christmas in July In Memory of Bevan Heathcote 1937– 2015 Our Club Members in Action Please support our Sponsors

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Some notes from your Editors – Neville and Denise Odell If you would like to comment or contribute to our newsletter please contact Denise or Neville on 9309 3108 or e-mail us at nevodell@bigpond.net.au

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enise and I would like to take this opportunity to wish you all a Happy Christmas and a great 2016. We both hope that 2016 will be a great year for all our bowlers, croquet players and darts players as well as our social members.

First of all apologies to Glenn Boston and his wife. Your Editor included their photograph in Jim Woodward’s article on “Spider”. I was convinced that the photo was of Spider and his wife but once again the old memory let him down.

We received some great comments about our last newsletter. I would like to thank all our contributors as, without their help, we would not be able to produce a regular newsletter

What a wonderful world!

“May God grant you always...

A sunbeam to warm you, A moonbeam to charm you, A sheltering Angel, so nothing can harm you, Laughter to cheer you; Faithful friends near you.

And whenever you pray, Heaven to hear you.”

– An Irish Blessing

“I

have just read the latest newsletter and consider it of the highest standard and brilliant.” – Phil Oldershaw “Great work on the newsletter as usual. I am always very impressed with the newsletters the Club produces.” – Clive Adams “I have kept every newsletter Neville and Denise have produced since February 2007. The President then was Ian Marshall and it was printed in black and white.

Since then we just had newsletter number 62 and a lot of photos in colour from our dedicated Editors. Neville and Denise spend a lot of time taking photos and making inquiries about results and the life of members and also collecting jokes that could fill the small gap in a page . I always enjoy reading the newsletter and would like to take this opportunity to thank Neville and his helpers for all their time and great work.” – Monique Kopec

“Thank you very much Denise. The tribute to Dennis Saunders was very touching and a testimony to a great man.” – John (Dennis’ son-in-law).

Some More “Did you Hear” and “Did you Know”?

Did you hear that Carmel and Lorraine Hyde have been swanning around Japan this time? This photo shows them out to a Japanese dinner and drinking Saki. They had Geisha girls dancing and sitting at their table.

They also went on a tour from Kyoto to Tokyo and then caught the Bullet train to Mount Fuji, and then the Diamond Princess, which sailed around Japan.

Did you hear that after one of his players had put down a terrible delivery the Skip said “That delivery was sent down with Skill, Heart, Ingenuity and Talent”. According to past member, Brian Townsend, this was the best way to describe the bowl using the capital letter from each word.

Did you hear that Pauline Bourne and her “hot shot” team (consisting of Liz Marshall, Jan Cook and Wendy Saul) did very well in the Dalkeith Nedlands Spring Fours?

They beat State player, Noelene Abe and her team by one shot and then went on to come third overall, against top opposition (without the help of Pauline who had to withdraw due to Tony being sent to hospital).

Did you know that John Godfrey attended his first Opening Day in 24 years of membership? He tells me he enjoyed the day. At one stage he was seen with lipstick on his groin. No one seemed sure about how this came about but Shelly Gray seems to know what happened!

Did you know that Ron Rogers and Bruce Eagles reached the last 16 in the State Consistency Singles? Ron lost in a very close game – 121 to 119. Bruce lost to State player Tom Mitchell 120 to 98. Well done you guys!

Did you hear that my good wife, Denise, had to do a bit of audience participation in the recent Absinth circus show in the Spiegeltent? The Gazillionaire, who was dispensing gob-smacking crudities whilst introducing a dazzling line-up of twirlers, balancers and flyers, wanted a “sexy Granny” to judge who was the best male dancer?

I was surprised when she went up onto the stage and proceeded to award “best dancer” to Mario!! Well done to “Mrs. Oddie”!

Did you know that Kathy Gobbart, a former State Champion and the current W.A.

Coaching with Kathy

(former State champion and long term State player – current Over 60’s champion) Group sessions for 8 – 16 players – 5 hours of tuition with video analysis – $50 per player Individual lessons – $50 per hour with video analysis

Over 60’s champion has joined our club? Kathy lives in Gin Gin and travels down to Sorrento as and when required. She tells me this takes her about an hour. She has been a bowler for 35 years and has been married to Norm for eleven years. She has a son Andrew who hates bowls for obvious reasons as he was the only child sitting on the sidelines in the earlier days. Her other hobbies are golf and gardening.

Did you hear about Sorrento’s version of Robert Ludlum’s famous Bourne Trilogy?

Some old-timers will tell you things come in threes! Well Tony and Pauline Bourne found this to be true. They commenced with a dramatic bonfire when they set their house boat alight (on a canal in France) while trying to do an Aussie barbie on their boat’s electric barbie. Unfortunately all their passports, tickets and personal belonging were lost in the fire. After their return to Australia Tony managed to get a blockage in his gall-bladder. Fortunately the operation went well and in a few days he was back playing bowls. The third part of the trilogy was the birth of a gorgeous grandson called Joshua who was born on 4 September. Thanks to time differences they were able to see him soon after his birth via Skype on 3 September.!! So “all’s well that ends well”.

Did you hear that one of Australia’s leading grass court experts will look at converting lawn bowls greens into tennis courts as Tennis ACT leaves no blade of grass unturned in their bid to bring the Davis Cup to Canberra?

Did you know that the Sorrento Bowling Club is a Level 1 Good Sports Accredited Club? That’s right. The Good Sports Club program, a national preventive health initiative of the Australian Drug Foundation, has recognized Sorrento through its Goods Sports Level 1 Accreditation.

This accreditation recognizes that Sorrento abides by its Club License requirements; has bar management strategies in place; and our bar staff attend Responsible Service of Alcohol training.

The Good Sports programme supports clubs to build safer and healthier clubs and communities. It helps clubs change their culture to become more focused on families and community and less on drinking alcohol. The benefits to us of being a Good Sports accredited club include a culture that reduces high-risk drinking thereby reducing the risk of members drink driving, and being a more family friendly place providing a culture that is welcoming to families and juniors. Being part of the Good Sports programme assists to generate community support and respect thereby securing new sponsorship opportunities; improves relationships with community organisations such

as local government and the police, creating a good public image whilst improving the chances of success with our applications for sponsorships, funding and grants.

– Neville and Denise Odell

From the President

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reetings Members. As Christmas looms on the approaching horizon, so does the half way mark of the current term of office of our office bearers. It’s been a pretty busy and demanding few months.

Members often tell me that outsiders regard Sorrento as a social bowling club. I regard this as a compliment rather than a criticism. Our Club has been built over the past 40 years on a very strong fabric of social and community interaction and responsibility.

Ask any member who has undergone life’s big challenges, including the loss of a loved one, just how supportive and caring our Club has been to them.

We’ve grown to be a very strong club; financially secure and in my humble opinion well managed and well run. We are among the largest bowling clubs in the State in terms of capitated bowlers with an impressive five quality grass greens. Our hundred plus regular volunteers makes us the envy of all clubs and is testimony to what sort of club we are in so many ways.

But we are also a very competitive club. You only need to look back at our record over the years with continual promotions and solid performances. Our 2011/12 season for example was exceptional with six out of our nine men’s divisions on Thursdays participating in the finals, achieving one Pennant and four promotions. Five out of the Men’s Saturday divisions played in finals, gaining two promotions. Our Ladies performed very well with our first division side gaining promotion to the Premier division in 2014/15.

Up until this year we had held one-white in Saturday’s Men’s Pennants for four years, just falling short of winning Premier Division in our first year. So don’t let anyone tell you that we are not a competitive club.

We do not pay our players opting rather to grow our own talent. A team of senior players has developed a “First Division Map to Success” that sets out goals and strategies for our One-blue Men’s Pennant side to regain One-white and ultimately Premier Division. We asked members who had aspirations to play in our highest divisions to put their hands up – including existing first division players.

Our various initiatives plan to draw heavily on the expertise and experience of high calibre and well credentialed bowlers such as Kathy Gobbart who is running coaching for our ladies, and Clive Adams who is an advisor to our Governing Council.

Work has continued to redevelop the Club’s strategic plan titled 2020 Vision – Planning for the Future of the Sorrento Bowling Club.

Our new “Long Term Plan” is titled: Continuing to Thrive Beyond 2025.

The new iteration of the Plan is titled Continuing to Thrive Beyond 2025. The 2020 Vision has served the Club well over the past eight years. Long term planning is vital for the Club’s ongoing viability and our planning can never stop. Our latest iteration will plan for the Club’s development over the next ten years.

Each year as part of the Club’s financial arrangements, funding is put aside for depreciation. The Club has a fairly large asset base which wears over time and requires replacement. In addition surplus funding needs to be allocated for new capital initiatives. Over the past few months the Governing Council has been working to develop a Capital Investment Plan to ensure the orderly and considered allocation of available funding. The following are the projects that have been approved for funding this financial year.

• Upgrade of the power boards at a cost of $2000. We need to replace power boards •

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and extension cords connected to computer stations with safer alternatives.

Members may have noticed that 9kw solar panels have been erected on the northern facing roof of the clubhouse. Funded by the Club at a cost of $17 000 these panels will greatly reduce electricity costs and demonstrate our commitment to environmentally friendly solutions.

For the extension of our kitchen Phase 1 will cover the exhaust and replacement equipment at a cost of $40 000. Preliminary plans will be drawn up and some cost options reviewed. This will allow for a wider variety and increased number of meals with an increased patronage. This project is linked to Council funding the Western extension in 2018/19. Our stove also requires replacement.

We plan to clean up and redo the information nook at a cost of $1500. We will develop an information hub to replace existing clip boards and notices on the western end of the club house.This will improve presentation and information dissemination.

We intend to clad the face brick in the remaining face brick in the lounge at a cost of $1500 and then continue the cladding of the face brick in the sports area into the

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lounge area as this will modernise the clubhouse and attract greater patronage.

Tables and stools will be purchased for the lounge area at a cost of $6000. We will place lounge style chairs and tables in this area as this will once again modernise our clubhouse and attract greater patronage whilst providing increased seating in the sports area.

Our PA system needs to be upgraded at a cost of $3500.

The City of Joondalup has scheduled the extension of the clubhouse to the western end of the building in 2018/19. At an estimated cost of almost $200 000, this extension will see the western wall of the clubhouse, from the front entrance to the northern end of the building extended by five metres to allow for a new administration, match office and meeting room. Stages 2 and 3 of the kitchen redevelopment will then expand into the area currently occupied by the existing administration office. Stage 1 of the kitchen refurbishment is being funded as part of the Club’s Capital Investment Plan and will commence shortly. We are hoping to negotiate with the Hon. Troy Pickard (Mayor of the City of Joondalup) to have the western extension project brought forward to commence one year earlier in 2017/18.

Our Club’s Half Yearly General Meeting, which will be held late December or early January, will see a Notice of Motion to further amend the Club’s Constitution. Some of the changes proposed are required to comply with the Associations Incorporations Act while others seek to expand the Club’s objects and improve the Constitution’s procedures for addressing member complaints.

The existing point of sale (tills), membership management and resource booking systems are being replaced progressively from November this year by a new more robust system being purchased from Infotel. The new system, which is widely used in hotels, will be mostly funded through a negotiated arrangement with our previous vendor.

Club membership cards will continue to work with the new system with member balances transferred across at the time of conversion.

A new Membership Marketing Plan has been developed by the Governing Council that involves as part of its implementation, the commencement of a staged letter box drop to surrounding suburbs. Thanks go to advertising agency Lateral Aspect for the development of the flyer and to Alan Bishop and Elizabeth Boyce for coordinating the letter box drop, together with a number of members who are helping with the distribution. It goes without saying that the prosperity of the Club is dependent on increasing our membership and the efforts of our members to achieve this are much appreciated.

Another important aspect to the Plan is social media. Something foreign to many of us 10

I am sure, in order to communicate with our membership target cohort of 45-60 year olds, social media is a space that we have to be in. Fortunately we have the services of Bruce Eagles to help us develop and implement our social media strategies such as Facebook and Twitter. The Club’s website is also a vital cog within this strategy.

Thanks go to Ian Wittber for dealing with a recent cyber attack on our website and assisting with the revamp of the site.

In a first, we have established a President’s Forum involving seven bowling clubs plus Sorrento. The Forum will meet bi-monthly and provide the opportunity for likeminded club presidents to work together and share ideas to improve the sustainability of their bowling clubs. The first get together will be held at Sorrento in November.

Thanks go to Trish Cunningham and Jan Cook and the Social Committee for their drive in running a number of events for the entertainment of members. Live music will become a more regular event at the Club as will an increased variety of shows. I encourage our 550 members to come along and support these events.

Clive Adams, a well known bowler and adviser to the Governing Council, has kindly agreed to help us implement our Volunteer Management Plan. This plan will see a small team of volunteers work with Clive to develop strategies to properly manage, recognise and reward our many volunteers who work so tirelessly in the Club on your behalf. Although we have over 100 regular volunteers we can always use more. If you would like to help, please see our Volunteer Coordinator, Ken Giles.

On the bowls front, I get the strong sense of renewed vibrancy in the Club as our ladies strive to succeed in Premier division and our men fight to regain First Division White. Please give your support and encouragement to our bowls related committees and our constantly under the pump sectors.

Well hopefully members will see the substantial work that is being undertaken on their behalf by members of the Governing Council members, their committees and sub-committees and our hard working volunteers.

Effectively managing a club like Sorrento is becoming more and more challenging as we are tasked to comply with ever increasing legislation and regulations. Please remember to not take our volunteers for granted and say thanks whenever the opportunity arises.

Thanks as always go to Neville and Denise Odell for their ongoing splendid work with the newsletters. – Brian Lucas 11

Our 39th Opening Day: 27 September 2015

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pening Day 2015 began with another spectacularly beautiful spring day. The very successful format of the last two years was continued this year, with members meeting at the Club for morning tea at 10.00am, followed by the official proceedings. These began with speeches by President Brian Lucas and Russ Fishwick (councillor for the South Ward and representative for the mayor Troy Pickard who was unavailable).

Other dignitaries who were in attendance were Teresa Ritchie (councillor for the South Ward) and Mike Norman (councillor for the Southwest Ward) and his wife Gezina.

Bruce Eagles, our resident chaplain, conducted his annual blessing of the greens. The symbolic first rolling of a bowl and striking of a croquet mallet were performed by our visiting dignitaries, who are becoming very competitive with each other in this capacity.

Life members and guests were called up first for a fabulous lunch of salads and cold meats plus dessert which was provided by our wonderful Silver Fern Caterers. A tremendous vote of thanks must go to Trish and Ross Cunningham for serving such beautiful food and so appropriate for those of us who played the two games of bowls that followed lunch. The attention to detail and the professionalism of the entire service was as outstanding as it always is.

Two games of 11 ends were played in the afternoon by 24 mixed teams of men and women who were again playing for the Des Bennett Memorial Trophy which had been won by the Men’s Captain’s side in each of the last two years with very close scores. The Ladies Captain, Sharon Eggers, was hoping for a change in these results.

There was a lot of laughter, cheering and a fair amount of groaning as well as the matches progressed.

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At the end of the afternoon, Sharon and Pauline Marsden tallied the results of all of the games and it soon became apparent that the results were leaning heavily in one direction. The majority of games were won by teams playing for the Men’s Captain’s Side and the final difference in overall shots was a huge deviation from the past two years’ results.

So – AGAIN (sigh!!) – the Men’s Captain’s Side won the trophy – Boo Hoo!!!!!! A closer result would have been preferable. Nevertheless, a big thank you to everyone who played – hopefully you really enjoyed your two games in such glorious conditions.

I would like to say thank you very much to all of you who attended our annual Opening Day. It was so wonderful to see so many of you there to celebrate the start to our new playing season.

I also owe special thanks to the following people who helped with the organisation of the day. I really appreciated everything that was done to help – no matter how small.

• John Godfrey as the new Men’s Bowls Captain and my co-organiser. Also, John and a small band of male helpers went in early on Opening Day morning to finalise table arrangements for lunch.

• Brian Lucas and the invited dignitaries who contributed in their various ways to the formal opening ceremony with speeches, rolling of bowls and swinging of croquet mallets.

• Bruce Eagles for his blessing of the greens – hopefully it will enable all of Sorrento’s teams to perform as they would like to during the season to ensure continued success for the Club.

• Helen and Jim Ironside who manned the door to check attendance, payment and to give out fixtures cards.

• Ross and Trish Cunningham, from Silver Fern Catering for providing a beautiful delicious lunch, up to their usual awesome standard and so perfect for this occasion.

• The green keepers and their helpers who prepared the greens for our use today.

Particular mention goes to our new green keeper, Alan McFayden, who has settled into the job so fantastically and is doing a superb job of managing our five grass greens and our croquet court.

• Neville Odell for acting most professionally as club photographer once more • Ian and Andrea and any other bar staff for organising the champagne and drinks for lunch and for facilitating payments for today’s event.

And lastly, but by no means least, Pauline Marsden who has been my most valuable right-hand woman. She has organised the visiting dignitaries, fielded a myriad calls 13

Opening Day Blessing

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was recently on a flight from Athens to Dubai when a scruffy unshaven mid age Greek man in a t-shirt and shorts sat next to me. I’m embarrassed to say this but I couldn’t imagine that an enjoyable stimulating intelligent thought provoking conversation would follow. How wrong I was! This man spoke perfect English and is a senior coach and personal trainer for the Greek Olympic judo team. As a consultant physician specialising in sports medicine, he has private practices in Greece and London and a long list of degrees.

I told him of my work in the hospital with patients and I described the world of lawn bowls. This fascinated him. He went on to say that the very best athletes he has coached and helped recover from serious injury were those who nurtured BODY MIND and SPIRIT. We talked at great length about the place of spirituality (common to all and unique to each) and blessing as a natural part of the sporting world and he was delighted to know we incorporated a blessing at the beginning of our season.

Our Blessing: “Our prayer today is simply one of seeking your gracious blessing over the different expressions of this fine Club. Loving God we pray for each person and family whose heart and mind is bowed before you right now. For those in a good place we thank you for your abundant blessing. For those in a difficult place we pray comfort and hope for a better tomorrow. We pray for those who work diligently to make our Club strong and viable. As we move to our greens shortly to launch our season we ask for your favour over the greens and an enjoyable season for all who play. We acknowledge our dependence upon you for life and breath and express our sincere thanks for every blessing that comes our way” Amen.

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– Bruce Eagles

Our Opening Day Sponsors – Spraggon George

Above: All signs led to the Sorrento Bowling Club Right: Marie Smart won the bottle of Champagne donated by Spraggon George

Special thanks to Spraggon George for sponsoring our Open Day. Remember for all your real estate need please call ‘Your friends in the business” 20 Years of successful business

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and requests from me, helped me to select the teams, written all the cards and done countless other small but necessary jobs. Thank you so much, Pauline. I hope I have not forgotten someone without whose help something would not have worked today.

In case I have, to them, I say thank you and sorry for not remembering who you are.

I would like to wish everyone a wonderfully enjoyable, fulfilling and successful bowling season which is now under way and look forward to seeing all of you at the Club often.

– Sharon Eggers

Sex Change They’re talkin’ in orl of the papers, An’ parleement’s havin’ a brawl, Bout who can get married to which one, An’ nobody cares much at orl.

I always thort Weddin’s wuz special, When a Bloke an’ a Girl tied the knot, An’ he promised to love an’ to keep her, (For the ‘girls’ wuz a pretty weak lot.)

Now there’s been a big change – I can tell you, My wife’s an example of this, She started off bein’ a woman Just wantin’ a hug an’ a kiss.

But Gawd! How she’s changed since we’re married, (It’s orl part of a 40 year plan), She used to wear frilly short dresses, Now it’s Jeans and a shirt – like a Man. She’s not the same girl that I married, She used to drink ‘Champers’ so nice, Now it’s Kilkenny an’ Tooheys an’ V.B. An Stubbies of grog on the ice.

She’s taken to punting the horses, An’ sayin’ rude things about me, She mowed the back lawn on Friday, An’ called me “a lazy old B---!”

An’ now she’s gone off to the ‘Footie’, With a ‘beanie’ an’ jumper (So Wide), She yells out rude things to the Umpire, An’ abuses the ‘other mob’s side.

You see wot I mean about sex-change, Fair Dinkum! It’s no flamin’ joke, I’m changin’ me outlook on marriage, For I think that I married a Bloke.

Skew Wiff.

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Around Our Club

Margaret and Keith Cooper looking happy after winning $3700 on our “Joker Jackpot” Dion Smith, Rick Munt, Alan Walton and Peter Balcombe with their motorised Esky after the Dash for Cash

Coral Smith and her grand-daughter Emma. Coral says she has brought nothing but happiness to their lives since she arrived

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Bob and Shelley Jeffs, their son Todd and grandson Harrison. Too bad Bob didn’t dress up like Shelley did!!

Left: John Collishaw looking pleased with himself having just won the 1st prize in the Helloworld Nominated Pairs competition and raffle

Around Our Club - continued Pauline Marsden, also known as “Madame Secretary� hard at work in the Office

Winners of the Cancer Day Social Bowls: Stan van Mosseveld, Robyn Woodward and Frank Gandras (missing from photo Wim Wouts). Well done to all involved. A $500 donation was made to the Cancer Council

Mary and Allan Rolls at a very special Black Tie dinner Winners of the Warwick Gala Day Moira Dean, Robyn van Mosseveld, Shelley Jeffs and Denise Odell with Chris Bursey from Ray White Left: John Sturk with the Esky he won in the Spraggon George Opening Day Raffle 18

Male Logic: Critical Thinking at its Best!

Woman: Do you drink beer?

Man: Yes Woman: How many beers a day?

Man: Usually about three.

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?

Man: $5 which includes a tip.

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?

Man: About 20 years, I suppose Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have three beers a day which puts your spending each month at $450 In one year, it would be approximately $5400 ...correct?

Man: Correct Woman: If in one year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, the past 20 years puts your spending at $108,000, correct?

Man: Correct Woman: Do you know that if you didn’t drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a step-up interest savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a new Ferrari?

Man: Do you drink beer?

Woman: No Man: Where’s your Ferrari?

– Thanks to Mike Berecry for this contribution

Believe In Yourself

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he following article was copied from the Joondalup Cricket Club’s Notice Board and might be of interest to members Success is doing the best you can, in as many ways as you can. It is being just and honest and true, not just in a few selected things but in everything you do.

Always look ahead and never look back. Believe you can make all your dreams come true. Always believe in the best and have faith in everything you do.

Forget about mistakes – you made them yesterday. The lessons you have learned will prove valuable today and tomorrow. Never give up and think you are through – for there is always tomorrow and a chance for a new beginning.

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Success is dreaming the biggest dreams and seeking the highest goals – that’s how we build the biggest tomorrow. There is no limit to the goals you can attain or the success you can achieve – the possibilities are as endless as your dreams.

Whatever it is you seek in life, whatever your dreams are, whatever you hope to achieve, whatever you try to reach, whatever you are planning – it can all be yours if you only believe.

The day you can recite this from the heart is the day you will become a real bowler, croquet player or darts player – Author Unknown

A Function of Affluence

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n our August 2015 newsletter under the heading ‘From the Archives’ I was most interested to observe the bar prices 37 years ago (April 1978). Beer then was $0.23 for a Pony; $0.33 for a Glass; $0.44 for a Middy and you could get a Jug for $1.90.

In those days the game for Men was 25 ends. I joined shortly after the time that Men’s Pennant games had an adjournment for a cup of tea at the half way point. Although I did hear many stories of a complete turn around in fortunes on returning to the rink.

Maybe more than tea was consumed!

Even in 1990, on returning to the Club room the choice drink was a pony of beer. (only the 1 Red players would order Middys). From recollection, I think you could order Swan Lager or Emu bitter. Low strength beer hadn’t been invented.

Which leads me to contemplate – why is it that all men bowlers now drink Middys (or even 15oz Schooners) and think nothing of it? I have rationalised that it is a function of the affluence of our times.

– Philip Oldershaw

Types of Bowls

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ome new bowlers are a bit confused when a Skipper asks for a certain bowl. Most of us know what a DRAW bowl is and perhaps a DRIVE or a RUNNING SHOT. There are however a number of other shots your Skipper will request so it is important that you know what is required at all times so we decided to provide a list of what is required for the following: A ROBBO BOWL: This is also known as a Blocker. It is designed to get in the 20

opposition’s way and prevent them driving at the head or getting in through a port thereby winning the end. It was named after Peter Robson one of our members and has now become an internationally recognised term. Don’t Google “Robbo” as you may be shocked at the result.

A GOLDILOCKS BOWL: This is when the Skipper wants a bowl that is “just right” like Goldilocks’ porridge. It is a very difficult shot to play and is similar to what is required when the Skipper says: “Don’t change anything”.

A HIT AND HOPE BOWL: There are desperate times when one of these are required.

All you can do is hurl it down and hope for the best possible result.

A CHOP AND LIE BOWL: This is a bowl that the Skippers want to hit the shot bowl with a bit of oomf and then to stay for shot.

There are also other names for bowls that you will hear on the green. Most of these are self-explanatory e.g. A HOLLYWOOD BOWL, A CHEATING BOWL, A POINTLESS BOWL and A SHOCKING BOWL. Recently someone asked his Third to play AN ORTON. Still not too sure exactly what this is but it seemed to involve a lot of “swooping” followed by plenty of wicks!

– Neville Odell

Report from the Office Manager

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he position of Office Manager, whilst a new title, covers the majority of matters that were previously handled by the Secretary, along with a few added responsibilities as detailed under the reconstructed Governing Council.

Apart from looking after the more mundane aspects of receiving and processing mail and e-mail from all over, we have responsibility for the website, communications and computer systems. All of these matters are being handled by myself as the Office Manager, and Pauline Marsden, who has also been added to the Governing Council, as the Assistant Office Manager. We share some responsibilities, but membership processing will be taken over by Pauline, and I will assume role of co-ordinating functions, and ensuring that all parties that are involved, are advised ahead of time when something requires their input.

Web page To assist with these processes, it is necessary to try and bring our Club’s web page up to date, and make it a focal point for members to refer to when they want to know what is happening around the Club.

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The people that set up the web page, and were supposed to maintain the programme that makes it work, let us down, and as a result we were “hacked”. This process has now been handed to another “hosting” business who have undertaken to keep updates processed in a timely manner, and also assist us with other matters affecting our computers. Derek Smith will still be involved with the IT side of the computer systems, but matters concerning the website and communications will be handled by the office.

I have learnt quite a lot in the last couple of months, about how a web page works, and am now keen to involve all sections of the Club in getting their particular area promoted in a fashion that is presentable, and easy to access and read.

This will take a little time, but a start has been made, and for starters, we plan on getting the Pennant teams up as soon after the selection process as possible, and this will have the names of the players for each team, who they are playing next, and whether they are at home or away. Still a bit of work to get both men and women’s teams up in the same fashion, but we are getting there.

We also have put some forms up on our web page, enabling outsiders to make contact with the Club, as well as for those wishing to hire our facilities. These forms will give us sufficient information to allow us to assess fairly quickly, and get back to those enquiring as soon as possible. Down the track, we will try and get those that wish to play in a club event to complete a form, which will be submitted, and a copy sent to those organising the event.

We are also looking at ways we can get current information and photos up, and one way may be by the use of Facebook. We realise that this might not be everyone’s preferred method, but it seems that by using a programme such as this, we can reach a wider audience, as well as our members that are “tech savvy”. This is still under discussion.

Communication Up until now, we have done a lot of broadcasting of information by e-mail, and whilst this will continue for some things, we will be trying to get members to look at the website for information. Again, not all members are familiar with this method, but I venture to suggest, that if they have an e-mail account, then they have access to the internet and can access a web page. E-mails will be used for more personalised communication, within committees for example.

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Computers The computers that we have in the office and within the bar also hold all of our records, and currently too many persons have access. We will be restricting this access to those that need to have input, and then they will only be able to access those programmes that are relevant to their role. This will be done by use of passwords.

Similarly we are concerned that a lot of our information, whilst it is being “backed up”, is not being handled in a manner that safeguards us from loss of information and records, if for example we had a fire, or received water or electrical damage. We are looking at a system that will back up all the relevant computers onto a “cloud” on a daily basis, and safeguard our information.

New bar tills are being commissioned early in November to replace the existing system, which has proven to be unsatisfactory. Hopefully this will be a seamless process, and members should not notice any real change. However in the background it will be a major advance, enabling us to conduct stock takes more efficiently, give management better information, manage member records, and also maintain a system to handle functions. All three will be within the same system, which will be an improvement on the current methods. All of this will take some time to settle in, and bring up to date, but at the end of the day, we believe that we will have a much more productive system.

Mainly, I wish to advise our members that we are working in the interests of all of the members, and at the end of the day, be able to present our Club as one that is progressive in providing better communication to the members, and managing all aspects of our Club in a professional manner.

– Ian Wittber

Nine facts to remember as you grow older Number 9 Number 8 Number 7 Number 6

Number 5

Number 4

Number 3

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Death is the number one killer in the world.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Men have two emotions: hungry and horny, and they can’t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 2

Number 1

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.

Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow. And as someone recently said to me: “Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last that long.”

– Thanks to Annie Taylor for this contribution

Report from the Sponsorship Committee

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he new Sponsorship Committee, consisting of Brian Self, Neville Odell, Clive Adams and Wayne Gray have made good progress with regaining “lost” sponsors, finding new sponsors and looking after and motivating our existing sponsors.

Thanks to the efforts of Brian Lucas, Ian Marshall, Peter Snow and Greg Day, income from our sponsors over the last five years has averaged about $22000 per annum.

We have set ourselves a target income of $28000 for the 2015/16 financial year from about 25 sponsors.

Money from our sponsors is used to encourage members to support our sponsors.

Sponsors are featured at events such as the Masters’ Singles, the Dash for Cash and the Trevors Carpets Days. Sponsors services are advertised in this newsletter. The extra costs for the colour printing of the newsletter is covered as well as the cost of the Pots vouchers we award during the Pennant season. Thanks to Brads Hairdressers and Safeway Security who sponsor the Men’s and Ladies’ Pots respectively. The cost of the signs above the bar, Darts boards and on the greens and is also covered from this income. Any balance remaining after the above costs is used to cover other Club expenses.

It is important that members support our sponsors. When you support a sponsor please tell the sponsor that you are from the Please Sorrento Bowling Club and that you appreciate their on-gosupport our ing support. To encourage members to support our sponsors a lucky draw has been introduced. All you need to do is to put a Sponsors and win copy of your receipt, for the transaction, with your name and a lucky draw for a $50 prize contact number, into the specially marked Sponsor Raffle Box and you will qualify for the lucky draw and a chance to win $50. A list of current sponsors and their contact details is now available for you to take home and place on your fridge door or next to your telephone.

Please note that Kels Menswear have offered a 5% discount and Cellarbrations a 10% 24

discount on presentation of membership cards so remember to request your discount.

A very successful Helloworld Mixed Pairs was held in August. Helloworld Balcatta was happy with the publicity and a number of members are now using this sponsor for their travel arrangements. Profit on the day was $300 plus $200 from “Selfie’s Sponsorship Raffle”.

We also made sure Safeway Security got additional recognition at the last Dash for Cash and Spraggon George got featured at our Opening Day. The Twilight Bowls event is now being sponsored by the Duncraig IGA so again we ask that members support this sponsor. Certificates of Recognition have been given to selected sponsors and free social memberships have been offered. With the help of Ian Wittber and Derek Smith we are making sure that our sponsors are well represented on our website and are scrolled though the TV’s in our Club.

We also acknowledge the following donations which are used for raffles to raise additional income:

• • • • • • • •

Sorrento Beach Resort who have donated a $500 accommodation voucher Kels Menswear who have donated seven $20 vouchers Helloworld who have donated four $40 vouchers and a bottle of Champagne Carlton Breweries who have donated two large eskys Wendys who donate ice-cream for the Ladies’ Gala days Grand Cinemas who have promised some complimentary tickets Dickies Tree Services who cleared the area behind the Croquet Club for free The Glengarry Tab who donate $5 vouchers which are handed out to winning Pennant team at 6.15pm on a Saturday.

Please also note that any issues members might have with sponsors should be passed to Brian Self to avoid conflicting advice and comments with the consequent risk of the loss of a sponsor. So remember please don’t hassle our sponsors – just support them!

– Neville Odell 25

Men’s Match Committee Report Dash for Cash No 3 The third of the 2015 Dash(es) for Cash was held on Saturday 25 July. Twenty teams of men participated under cloudy but fine skies, and some close matches resulted.

(There was also a very lop-sided 19-1 result, but we won’t mention that for risk of embarrassing certain players, or of giving others big heads). Six teams managed to win both morning matches, so when we adjourned for the usual delicious soup-and-a roll lunch some keen afternoon contests were in store. In the end, only three of the lunch time leaders managed to win both of their afternoon matches, so deciding the overall 1-2-3 came down to the greater shots up margin.

Overall 1. R Hicks, T Needs, B Gartrell and J Lorencs (+26 shots) 2. L Baker, K Giles, B Bradshaw and B Eagles (+19) 3. R Slimper, P Webb, P Blake and R Tozer (+14) Round Winners 1.H Eisenmann, M Carrigy, B Williams, M Martin 2. D Smith, P Balcombe, R Munt, A Walton 3. G Barr, G Devenish, G Crosthwaite, R Kuziela 4. C Packer, A Elmer, M Korycin, B Saul Morning and Afternoons Rounds R Gray, S Newby, C Parr, I Parker S Smith, B Tighe, J Dilley, M Errington The N.A.B.A. award (don’t ask...) went to B Kiely, A Anderson, P Snow, J Brown My thanks to Barry Bradshaw and SAFEWAY SECURITY SCREENS for their ongoing sponsorship of this event, and to the ladies in the “soup kitchen” for once again providing the sustenance we poor tired bowlers needed in the middle of the day.

Helloworld Nominated Pairs Our Sponsorship Committee secured some sponsorship from Helloworld Balcatta, and an “any combination pairs” tournament was organised for Saturday 15 August. With 72 players this meant that three greens full of eager bowlers rolled up for this tworound event. A new scoring format which rewarded ends won and additional points for four or more shot end wins was trialed. It’s a “do again” type of event, although the scoring system might need some tweaking.

The overall winners were Barbara and Juris Lorencs who won 14 of the 22 ends played but also picked up two 4s, two 5s and a 6 for 39 points, Second place went to 26

Dash for Cash Winners Winners of the 3rd Dash for Cash Juris Lorencs, Terry Needs, Robbie Hicks and Barry Gartrell

Runners up of the 3rd Dash for Cash Bruce Eagles, Barry Bradshaw, Ken Giles, and Lindsay Baker

Winners of the 4th Dash for Cash John Collishaw, Trevor Orton, Neville Odell and John Sanders

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Rick Munt and Mick Martin, with Lee and Ken Leach and John Collishaw and Trevor Orton tying for 3rd. A great day was had by all, and our thanks to Helloworld for their sponsorship of this event.

Dash for Cash No 4 The fourth and final Dash for Cash, again generously sponsored by SAFEWAY SECURITY SCREENS was held on Saturday 29 August.

The weather forecast for the day was none-toobright, but apart from a couple of brief showers, the day turned out to be quite sunny and reasonable.

Barbara and Juris Lorencs with Rod Garnaut from Helloworld Balcatta

Due to a late team withdrawal, some last-minute rearrangement of the draw was necessary, and unfortunately, the last nominated team of Sorrento bowlers had to drop out to even the draw. (Note: Get your teams in early for next year’s D4C events.) So 18 teams took to the 13-14 second greens for this event.

After the morning two matches, some slightly damp bowlers adjourned for lunch – again generously provided by the ladies: Fran, Wendy, Sharon and Jan. THANKS ladies! Those soups went down really well. Only four teams had registered two wins at this point because, by a quirk of the draw, winners had been drawn to play winners on both greens. Then when all four of those teams won their third matches, it came down to the fourth and final match to decide the winners.

Ian Parker’s Quinns team lost by eight, Richard Bone’s team lost by three, Brian Saul’s team lost by two on the final end, and Trevor Orton’s team managed a draw with the last bowl of the match. So three and a half wins were enough to carry the day.

All the winners were: Overall winners with 3 ½ wins, plus 21 shots were Neville Odell, John Sanders, John Collishaw and Trevor Orton. Overall second with 3 wins, plus 12 shots were Dion Smith, Peter Balcombe, Rick Munt and Alan Walton. Overall third with 3 wins, plus 10 shots were Mike Korycin, Barry Stewart, Brian Clausen and Brian Saul.

Note: Some might say that it was a bit of a “Steven Bradbury” win for the Orton team wasn’t it? Everyone else fell over in the final round and left them in front. Do you remember him? If not look him up on Google .

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The round winners were: R1:Plus 13: Herbie Eisenmann, Mike Carrigy, Ross Cunningham and Mick Martin R2: Plus 7: Robbie Gray, Steve Newby, Chris Parr and Ian Parker R3: Plus 12: Ray Slimper, Spider Webb, Derek Smith and Rob Tozer R4 Plus 12 : Colin Bangs, Peter Snow, John Godfrey and Alan Anderson Morning rounds: 2 wins, plus 8 shots: Lindsay Baker, Ken Giles, Barry Bradshaw, and Richard Bone Afternoon rounds: 1 win, plus 4 shots: Robbie Hicks, Fred Faigenbaum, Barry Gartrell and Juris Lorencs Thanks to all participants over the four 2015 D4C events. In particular to SAFEWAY SECURITY SCREENS (Barry Bradshaw) for his sponsorship, to the catering ladies, to Ken Giles, Gavan Ebsworth, Barry Stewart, Derek Smith, Pat Dichiera and my wife, Anne, (and anyone else I may have forgotten) for their help this year.

Mixed Fours Championship The first of the 2015-2016 championships was completed on Sunday 11 October.

Sixteen teams entered for this event (which makes it very easy for the match draw), and after the first day’s matches, the semi-finalists in both major and plate returned to do morning battle under cloudy skies and humid but fine conditions.

The major semi-finalists were Ian Marshall’s team (Liz Marshal, Ian Wood (subbing for Brent Marshall who had to work) and Fran Bracknell) against Frank Bomford (with Pauline Marsden, Emily Dunn and Peter Blake).

The other semi-finalists were Trevor Orton’s side (Neville and Denise Odell and Kath Harris) pitted against Neil Mclaughlan’s team of June Gregory, Ron Rogers (subbing for the injured Jim Ironside) and Helen Ironside.

Both matches were very close but Ian and Trevor’s teams progressed to the final. Ian’s side established an early break, with Liz and Alan in particular bowling brilliantly and led 13-2. It looked like any early finish was in store when Ian led 18-5 with only 3 ends to play, but a trail for a 6 followed by a 3 for Trevor meant that there was “only” four shots in it with one end to play. Neville and Denise bowled two great bowls to hold two, but unfortunately, the jack was trailed by Kath so that Trevor was only holding one. After a brief discussion, the best outcome for Trevor’s team seemed to be to kill the end and try again. Trevor’s first bowl sliced the jack out of bounds and we returned to the mat. On the replayed final end, again Neville bowled two terrific bowls, and when Denise was promoted for a third, an upset loomed. Ian managed to remove one of the shots, but there was an opportunity for a match-tying four shots if Trevor could remove Ian’s nearest bowl. But despite hitting the target bowl, the score remained 29

at 2 shots to Trevor, and thus the win to Ian by 2.

Congratulations Ian and Liz, Ian (and Brent) and Fran, and to all other participants in this event.

The plate final was a last bowl turnover result to Alan Walton, who with Ian Marshall’s team and his winning team consisting of Brian Joy, Carol Ford and Fran Bracknell, Brent Marshall, Liz Marshall and Alan Wood (who subbed for Brent when he had to work) May Macliver defeated Annie Taylor’s rink of Marie Smart, Stan McCullagh and Derek Smith. Annie was holding two shots for the win until Alan’s last bowl snatched the victory. Well done all.

Mixed Pairs The on-going saga of the Mixed Pairs Championship for 2015/16 has taken place over three weeks - so far - and is still, at time of print, unfinished. But we do have a new mixed pairs champions and they are Jackie Maxwell and Rick Munt, two of the newer bowlers at our club. Jackie and Rick defeated Trish and Ross Cunningham 18-17 in the final on Sunday 1 November.

The margin between the two finalist pairs had not been more than four shots all match and the scores were tied 5-5 after five ends and 13-13 after 16 ends. A single shot and a three on the next two ends seemed to have given Trish and Ross a break, but Jackie and Rick weren’t going to lie down without a fight. Four shots down with only three of the 21 ends remaining, Jackie bowled three consecutive ends of very close bowls which Trish and Ross couldn’t match, while Rick defended his partner’s bowls superbly to accumulate the five shots they needed to prevail by one shot. Well done Jackie and Rick and all others who participated in this oft-disrupted event.

Jackie and Rick had beaten Wendy and Brian Saul in one semi-final and Trish and Ross got over Fran Bracknell and Bruce Eagles in the other.

But the real story of this tournament was in the quarter-finals where Jackie and Rick came from 3-16 down to beat previous 30

multiple champions Lee Leach and Ron Rogers in and extra-end match. Fran and Bruce had also won a very tight match over Liz and Brent Marshall in the other.

The Plate has still to be decided. Delayed matches due to State Fours commitments and temporary unavailability of other players has meant that this event will now not be concluded for a week or two. Or more!

– Trevor Orton

Ladies’ Match Committee Report Divorced Pairs 2015 This year’s Divorced Pairs was a well supported Club event and the Match Committee thank the 30 teams that turned up to play in ideal weather conditions. It is very rewarding to see so many smiling faces at this event. Unfortunately we lost two teams before the start of the competition due to illness and injury.

This year the overall winners by an impressive margin were Pauline Bourne and Rick Munt with a score of 4 points and 40 shots up. In the photo alongside are Ric and Pauline receiving their award from Brian Lucas, our Club President.

Congratulations to both players for a wonderful effort and score.

The runners-up on the day were Ted McGrady and June Gregory with a score of 4 points and 17 shots up. Well done to Ted and June.

The am winners were Ross Cunningham and Pauline Marsden with a score of 2 points and 17 shots up and the pm winners were Bob Jeffs and Annie Taylor with a score of 2 points and 15 shots up.

At the conclusion of the competition players enjoyed a sausage sizzle with onions and coleslaw which was appreciated by all the players. Our thanks to Alan Susta who cooked the sausages for us and to Trish and her House and Social Committee for their work with the coleslaw and serving.

100 -up Cold windy conditions prevailed in the first games. Nerrida Porteous accounted for Liz Marshall and Trish Cunningham beat Moira Dean. In the final Nerrida and Trish 31

had a top game with most of the ends being really top class. It was neck and neck all the way and finished with an exquisite bowl from Trish, trailing the kitty five inches to win the game. Judy Campbell, who marked, and the spectators were in awe of the calibre of the game.

In the Plate June Gregory and Robyn Woodward had a good game, with Robyn coming off with a win.

In the other match Jackie Maxwell got off to a flying start only to be caught by a determined Barbara Lorencs.

In the final of the Plate Barbara showed her experience and the valiant Robyn tried hard with some good shots but went down. Well done Girls!

– Helen Ironside/Moira Dean

Umpires’ Corner: Bowls Practice

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eville has asked me to clarify the existing by-laws about bowls practice. I have done this and have also included the new rule just introduced by Bowls WA.

An objective of the Club is to encourage practice. Therefore roll-ups should be accommodated and encouraged wherever possible subject to the following: • Roll-ups are permitted, on any day of the week other than Mondays (unless authorised), when there is a spare green available and open for use.

• Roll-Ups are not permitted before 10am.

• Vacant rinks on greens that are being used for State Events, Pennants or Club Championships may not be used for roll-ups.

• Roll-ups are permitted prior to a social game.

• Roll-ups on a green that is to be used later for a Club competition or a Pennant game are permitted. However, for players due to play in that competition or Pennant game on that green, roll-ups must be completed 90 minutes prior to the scheduled starting time of the game. Players may continue to roll up on other greens they are not scheduled to play on, subject to dot point 3 above.

Note: This means that for Pennant games starting at 1:45 pm, roll-ups by players are not permitted after 12.15 pm on the green that is to be used for 32

their game.

During Club competitions, if a team or singles player that (1) has not yet played is due to meet a team or player that has already played on that day, or (2) has already played and then has a bye, that team or player can practice (roll-up) on the same green provided that:1. The controlling body (Match Committee) gives approval.

2. The roll-up does not interfere with or disturb adjacent rinks or delay the event.

3. A rink, apart from that on which the team or player has been drawn to play, is available and is used.

4. The team or player forfeits their right to have trial ends (roll-ups) on their drawn rink before the start of their game.

Note: This by-law also applies to events such as Trevors Carpets Days and Dash for Cash events. – Jim Ironside

Reunions

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group of mates, all aged 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the waitresses had big breasts and wore mini-skirts.

Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the food and service was good and the beer selection was excellent.

Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch.

Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because there was plenty of parking, they could dine in peace and quiet, and it was good value for money.

Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch.

Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Whetherspoons in Uxbridge because the restaurant was wheelchair accessible and had a toilet for the disabled.

Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch.

Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because they had never been there before. – Thanks to Richard Fermoyle for this contribution 33

Croquet Corner News Scout Group Play Croquet During August the Club was asked if a group of 20 boys and girls from a local Scout Group could come to learn to play croquet. The 16 – 18 year olds were hosted by a few of our members who kindly braved the cold weather to show them that there is more to the game of croquet than simply putting a ball through a hoop! They played for about two hours and found the game to be fun, challenging, and that it required a number of demanding skills to be learned.

We are trying hard to introduce croquet to younger people, and especially to those of school age who do not excel at other sports. If you know any young people who may like to try their hand at this sport, we would love to meet them and encourage them to play regularly. Please give their names and contact details to Pauline in the Office or put them into the rack in the “Croquet Corner” and we will contact them.

2016 Golf Croquet Pennants These weekly matches begin in January and continue for six weeks. Sorrento has again entered two teams – one in the ‘C’ Grade and one in the ‘B’ Grade. Judith Skeet, Kerry Bomford, Thora Lay and Margot Bindeman will play on Tuesday evenings in ‘C’ Grade; while Terry Harvey, Trish Klemp and Diana McGivern will play on Thursday evenings in the ‘B’ Grade competitions. An ex-Sorrento member, Peter Hamilton, will be the fourth team member in the ‘B’ Grade team.

City of Joondalup “Community Day” On Sunday 11 October, the Croquet Club participated in this event held at the ECU Sports Centre. The event was organised by “Inclusion WA” on behalf of the City of Joondalup. Two of our Club members set up hoops on two small lawns and were supported by three ECU “Sport and Recreation” students to assist members of the public with “trying their hand” at the game.

Although the Event was not as well supported by the public as had been expected, there was a steady flow of people who stopped to “Have a Go”. The three students were very excited by the game and between showing the public the rudiments of the game, they challenged each other to games – and LOVED it! We met a school teacher from a small, new, secondary school in the area who promised to speak to their PE teacher about introducing croquet to their students which, at present, are only Years 7 34

and 8 – a perfect time to begin. We hope to report on successful follow-up in the next edition of this Newsletter.

Croquetwest Trophy Day Awards At a luncheon held in Victoria Park on 17th October, Diana McGivern was awarded the “Most Improved Player” (female) for Golf Croquet. Paul Dodson (Geraldton) won the award for the most improved male Golf Croquet player; Megan Fardon (East Fremantle) for most improved female Association Croquet player; and Michael Murphy (Forrest Park) for the most improved male Association Croquet player.

It was good to see that Sorrento Croquet Club was represented amongst players recognised for their improvement. Congratulations to all!

Grandparent Day

Judith Skeet and her grand-children – Jazmin and Rubi Rabnott

Sunday 1st November was designated “Grandparent Day” at croquet. All Club grandparents were invited to bring along a grandchild or two to enjoy a social game of croquet and maybe even try their hands at bowls.

As it happened, only four regular croquet players were able to be at the event with a total of seven grandchildren, but that did not diminish the enjoyment of it! After an hour and a half of play, the group enjoyed a “sausage sizzle” on the BBQ (beautifully cooked by Di’s son-in-law, Richard Holland) as they chatted and laughed while recounting some of the shots made on the court.

One bowler remarked “I heard a lot of fun being had on your courts this morning!” She was so right! We hope that the message will be passed along and that we have a bigger turnout at similar events in the future.

Did You Know?

1.That Margot Bindeman and Kerry Bomford are related by marriage through the marriages of their second cousins? Kerry and Margot did not know each prior to playing Croquet at Sorrento.

2.That Ron Kuzeila and Alan (we know him as Glengarry Alan) from the bowling section have been playing croquet with some of the croquet members and are becoming top-class players?

3. That Thora Lay, Kerry Bomford and June Huckle from the croquet section are involved in producing sandwiches for the Men’s Bowls on Saturdays. Thora and Kerry buy and prepare the sandwich fillings; while June is part of a roster group that makes 35

up the sandwiches. (Sector integration is happening at last!)

Heritage Croquet During the weekend of 17th and 18th October the Perth public were invited to explore some of the more important heritage buildings in the city. One of these was Government House, which was the first venue in Perth at which the gentile game of croquet was played. To celebrate this, some croquet players were invited to be on hand to demonstrate the game being played. Terry Harvey (Sorrento Croquet Club) was invited to be one of the participants during the weekend – a great honour indeed!

“All people are created equal, and then some become croquet players!”

“Age and treachery will always defeat youth and skill” “Old croquet players never die, they just stop whacking their balls!”

“If you think that sex is better than croquet, you are not playing the game properly!”

“Croquet – think like a Chess player, use the angles of a snooker player”.

Men’s Pennant News

– Diana Mcgivern

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he beginning of the Pennant season has gone well with success on the greens and the recruitment of much needed new players. This season when the 5th division on Saturday went to three rinks it was an ideal opportunity to request that our 6th division side from last season be promoted to 5th division thus ensuring that these players were able to play an 18 round season rather than 14 rounds in 6th division.

Also with the addition of new players we successfully applied for another 5th division side for mid-week pennants. We now have 120 players representing the Club on Thursday and Saturday. Although it has been difficult to fill the sides with a number of players unavailable at the start of the season.

Saturday Pennants: After 2 rounds it is very pleasing to see that our 1 Blue side has recorded two wins and sit on top of the ladder. With the addition of new players Chris Lander, Brian Kiely Juris Lorrencs and Dennis Caffell our top side appears to have more depth and we are hopeful of promotion back to 1 White. Our two 5th division sides in 5 purple are also unbeaten after two rounds.

Congratulations to the rink of Keith Tompkins, John Smith, Dennis Croker and Ken Leach who achieved an 8 badge in Round 1 in 3 Blue.

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Pot Winners: The rink of Brian Joy, Ron Magerl, Joe Mola and Wim Wouts (Round 1) and Graeme Ezzy (Round 2) in 5 Purple have won the pots on each of the first two rounds winning by 22 and 20 shots respectively.

Thursday Pennants: In round one 5 of our ten sides recorded wins which included our top 2 sides in 1 Blue and 2 Blue. Warm welcome to our Irish recruit Peter Convery playing in our top side.

Brad’s Pot Winners: John Sturk, Eddie Tassone, Colin Bangs and Bill Long in 3 Blue winning by 39 shots.

– Rob Tozer

Ladies Pennant News

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o date we are having mixed results but due to the varying number of games played we will not know how we stand clearly until the end of the first round. Saturday Pennants have played twice, with three wins and one loss; Tuesday Pennants have only played once with two wins and two losses while Fourth division do not commence playing until Tuesday 11th November.

Coaching attendance 2.30 pm on Mondays has been very disappointing, our coaches give their time, petrol and energy to assist us and we are letting them down by not turning up to training. Only three (3) attended prior to 1st week of pennants and if this trend continues we are going to miss out on these sessions, which will be a great loss.

Please make a concerted effort to be there each Monday these can only benefit us all.

Safeway Pot winners were Charmaine Harris, Jean Middleditch, Barbara Hill and Betty Stern 29 to 8.

The weekly teams are now on the Sorrento Bowling club website, please utilise this site to check on all club activities and if you cannot get to the Club to look at the board this is the way to find out.

– Jan Cook

Greens and Grounds

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owls W.A. infrastructure committee reps inspected our greens and passed all five for pennant play on the understanding that C and D would only come on stream when the Greenkeeper was happy that they would meet all of our requirements. Since then C has been put into play and we believe that D is very close to right. It is the inten37

tion of the Greens Committee to renovate A when D does come back. The renovation will be light and the plinths will be levelled with the playing surface as it is considered that we may have a drop off on the Northern Bank, if our thoughts are confirmed that area will need to be rectified and that may require grass to be removed in blocks, sand added and the grass blocks replaced. The settling in of this process will take a little longer than a standard renovation. In late March/early April it is intended to renovate B and E and if the usage demands drop sufficiently after Pennants, we may take both of those out at the one time. Time will tell how this is handled.

The Thumbs Up Club have lost one of their long serving gardeners and we wish to thank Mike Thornett for the many hours he put in looking after our gardens, Mike not only came down on Mondays he was often seen during the week watering pot plants and the like. To Mike we hope Val gets better quickly and we thank you sincerely for being an active member of our group.

To assist with the spreading of wear on the North and South ends of the greens we have asked for members to line up on the rink boundary pegs rather than the rink number markers when rolling up. This is something we used to do in the past and it will assist greatly. Thanking you in anticipation.

It is our intention to have four greens available for use and we are targeting a speed of 16 to be our norm, given the right weather we believe that we can achieve this target.

We also wish to thank Brian Collins and Brian Saul for the work they have done at the club recently, the safety rail on South end of E and the ramp to the rubbish bin near the Greens shed, the repositioning of a power point bracket near the water-cooler and the welding of the shade cloth structure at North end of B are some of the tasks that these guys have completed. Also Peter Balcombe helped out with the transportation of long metal material required to repair the bin Ramp, thanks Pete – Kevin Cook

Darts Club Report

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ongratulations to all the teams that competed in the winter competition this year.

The Darts end of year luncheon and presentations will be held on 22 November so do not forget to put your names down. Unfortunately the end of year trip had to be cancelled but we are trying to arrange for a trip early in the new year. Please keep your eyes on the darts notice board.

I would also like to congratulate the winners of our Dart Club events: 38

Singles champion: Singles R/U: Singles plate: Singles plate R/U: Doubles champions Doubles R/U: Best of luck to our summer luncheon.

Gary Rogers Philip Webb Brian Lucas Ian Marshall Brian Lucas and Darren Stevens Glen Holman and Devyish Shah Darts sides and hope to see you all at the end of year

Dynamics of the Game of Bowls

– Wayne Gray

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t a recent coaching course run by one of our coaches, Brian Clausen, one of the participants, Jackie Maxwell asked “what were the dynamics of the game of bowls and what the main building blocks were”. Brian listed the following points: • The importance of getting your tactics right • Having a plan for the game • Learning to control the things you can control • Achieving a smooth repeatable delivery that holds together in pressure situations • Learning the mental side of the game • Learning what champions do to succeed • Studying elite performers • Making practice tougher than the game • Learning to win or lose with equal grace • Balancing bowling and living so you can enjoy both

2015 Ladies Fashion Parade

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he annual Sorrento Bowling Club’s Fashion Parade was held on Tuesday 15th September 2015. The attendance was down a little on past years with around 90 people present.

Displays of goods and services were run by Rod Garnaut from Helloworld, Joy Jackson and Barbara Spence with Nutrimetics beauty products and Kelly Cunningham with Scentzy wickless candles. Joy and Kelly very generously ran a raffle each with a beautiful prize from each of their products for the lucky winners.

Thank you very much to these wonderful and generous supporters of our event.

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People began arriving around 9.30am for morning tea and a chat. The fashion show itself began at 11am with the clothes, provided by Kings Park Fashions, being stylishly modelled by June Gregory, Carole Ford, Glen Larcombe, Clair Hanlon and Robin Rowe from croquet. It was great to see different models this year, although one or two appeared to be becoming a bit of a ‘prima donna’ by the end of the show – seems to happen every year. The models were dressed in a varied array of styles and paraded the items with great finesse and confidence.

The display of fashions took about an hour, after which people were able to try on garments they had liked and decide upon which items to purchase. The results of several raffles – 4 lucky door prizes, 2 money sheets, a fruit and vege basket, a wine basket, a Nutrimetics cosmetics pack and a Scentzy candle pack - were determined after lunch.

The prizes were well spread around amongst the assembled ladies.

When it was time for lunch, everyone lined up for bread rolls and hot soup, being able to choose between a half a dozen delicious soups, provided by individual club members who had volunteered their services in this area. The hall was again filled with chatter and laughter before most started to head off home. Others remained to tidy up and, after the work was done, a drink or two was had by those who chose to stay on.

A great vote of thanks goes to Trish and her helpers in the kitchen, who heated soups, put together morning tea, carried plates and cutlery and did dishes. Thank you very much also to the ladies who made the beautiful soups for our lunch – your contributions helped to spread the load for running this event. Thanks to all the people who supervised raffles. Special thanks to May Leyland who donated the beautiful fruit and vege basket as a raffle prize. Thanks also to a mystery well-wisher who donated door prizes. Jan Cook did a magnificent job of putting together the wine basket – thank you again, Jan. Thanks must also go to the ladies who set up the hall the night before the show – it is never easy pushing tables and chairs around. And a big thank you to all who attended – without you there, this event would not be possible. About $1160 profit has been raised to go into the club’s coffers – this is a bit less than past years but we decided soup makers would be reimbursed for their costs.

– Sharon Eggers

Geoff Murray’s Trip to Turkey

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rom around the globe, twenty-five members of 7RAR (1st and 2nd Tours of South Vietnam) and their families arrived in Istanbul to attend the 100th Commemorative Service of the 6 August Offensive 1915, at Lone Pine, where seven Victoria Crosses were awarded.

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Laying Wreaths at Lone Pine Left: Selena Moore, Ian McNee, Geoff Murray and Geoff Lawson. Right: The 7RAR Group at the Lone Pine Cemetery After a few days of intensive tourist activity we headed south to explore the Gallipoli peninsula where we visited numerous Turkish and Allied memorials and battle sites including Anzac Cove. All were outstanding and memorable and really brought home to all of us, just how difficult the terrain and the hot weather would have been for both the ANZACs and the Turkish soldiers.

The highlight of the tour was the stirring Commemorative Service which commenced at 1700 on 6 August to coincide with the start of the August Offensive. The temperature was in the high 30’s similar to that which the troops would have endured, Prior to the Service the Governor General Sir Peter Cosgrove MC took time to meet all of the “Pigs” (amongst Vietnam Veterans, 7RAR soldiers were proudly known as “Pigs”) and the families in a most sincere and casual manner.

At the conclusion of the service, Geoff Lawson and Geoff Murray laid a wreath on behalf of the 7RAR Association WA Branch. The next morning we returned to the Lone Pine cemetery, where we placed small wooden crosses and poppies next to some of the graves.

We then proceeded to The Nek, where we conducted a brief Memorial Service in memory of the fallen from the Western Australian 10th Light Horse (dismounted).

– Geoff Murray

Another “Jan and Friends Tour”

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arraine and Stan Brickell, Jan Paniperis and her sister Margaret Peirce, and former member of this Club, Marilyn Thorp, participated in one of Jan and friends’ tours.

They all met up in Venice and stayed at the wonderful Hotel Pesaro Palace, situated right 41

on the Grand Canal. The first evening they were treated to a lovely welcome drink and appetisers and were entertained by a very cute pianist.

After a couple of days buzzing around Venice, finding the best bars for their new drink – Aperol Spritz – taking a gondola ride and stocking up on Murano glass, they were taken to their villa in San Mattia, just outside of Verona. During the next four days they were taken on escorted tours of Verona, Bologna and Lake Garda, after which they were taken back to Venice where they picked up the Star Clipper which was to be their home for the next 12 days.

They were scheduled to travel down the Croatian coast, into Montenegro and then Greece. All went well until the last couple of days when they struck the well-known and often feared, Meltemi wind, i.e. storms, and were not able to put into Mykonos, and had to make do with Syros, which Is the capital of the Cyclades Islands and as a result not overtly touristy like the more popular islands, so most people enjoyed it all the more for that reason.

The tour finished in Athens, which showed very few signs of Greece’s economic and/or refugee crises. Stan, Larraine, Marilyn, Margaret and Jan stayed on an extra few days at the superb Royal Olympic Hotel with its fabulous views from the rooftop bar to the Akropolis, Temple of Zeus and Mt Lykavitos . S&L stayed on in Athens but MMJ slipped off to the beautiful island of Spetses, then returned to Athens for one more day of shopping and then hopped on the plane back to Perth.

– Jan Paniperis Dion S Smith Certified Practising Accountant Tel :9448 5595 0479091521 Sorrento WA Behind on your tax? Filling out a form? Need a tax agent that is open year round with boutique service at lower rates? Don’t lose sleep anymore. I’ll do my best to help you out.

Certified Practising Accountant, Tax Agent. A full range of accounting, tax advice and business advisory services. Also family agreements and co-ownership42agreements regarding loans and property transactions. Associates in insolvency, financial planning and law.

Letters to the Editor Men’s Welfare Officer My name is John Murphy and I have just volunteered to stand as the “Men’s Welfare Officer” and would appreciate you contacting me if you know someone who is not well at home or in hospital so I can arrange to visit them or send out a “Get Well Card” on behalf of the club. It would also be appreciated if you could contact me regarding the passing of members so I can organise members to attend their funeral and wake. My e-mail address is jcj.murphy@bigpond.com and my contact number is 0422 882 816.

– John Murphy Greetings from England Hi to you all at the Sorrento. It is that time of year when we would be over in Australia enjoying your lovely weather and hospitality unfortunately it is not to be so we would like to take this opportunity to wish all the friends we made and members of the club a very Happy Christmas and prosperous New Year, Yours in Bowls – Rita and Bryan Townsend Sledging on the Bowling Green It has become apparent that “sledging” and name calling is appropriate in some sports. The unsavoury sledge by tennis sports brat Kyrgios, that was broadcast to the general public to hear, is a prime example of this trend. Sledging is generally frowned upon in lawn bowls, but can still happen and become quite heated.

An example of a classic bowling sledge could be about how your opponent is performing. You might play a bowl and then half a minute later your opponent has to bowl, and he might just drop the line in there, “Geez, the wind got up on that one” or “It’s not as wide as it was in last end down on that side”. Just playing mind games and sowing a seed in the opposition’s head is a form of sledging. You can also be a bit harsher if you wish: 1st Player says “I slept with your mother last night. So that should put you off your game.” 2nd Player replies “That’s OK Dad. You have been married to her for the 45 years”.

1st Player says. “I slept with your sister last night” . 2nd Player replies “ You swine – she’s been dead for five years. Leave her in peace”.

“Oi, Mate, why are you so fat? To which the guy replied “because every time I sleep with your wife, she gives me a biscuit”.

Any further contributions to sledging at bowls would be appreciated by the Editor.

– Dick Currie 43

In Memorium: Jock Dale 1926-2015

J

ock Dale was a member of the Sorrento Bowling Club for many years. He was on the Match Committee and was a selector. Some of our older members remember him when he was a 1st Division Red bowler at the Bedford Bowling Club and in his later years when he was a regular supporter of our Friday and Sunday afternoon social bowls games.

Stan remembers that Jock was a bit critical of bad bowls and would refer to your bowl as “rat-sheeet” if it was short or wide.

Max Gouldthorp told me Jock had the most unbelievably beautiful garden. Monique remembers his strong chilli sauce and the pickles he used to sell to members. Annie remembers the face moisturiser he sold which she found to be quite good as long as it was kept in the fridge to prevent it going rancid. Helen Ironside remembers that Jock always called her “girlie”.

Juris remembers Jock’s love for loud county and western music and for talking about bowls while he was driving thereby making his passengers very nervous. Our condolences go out to his wife Muriel and his family.

– Neville Odell

Obituary – Bob Willers: 1928-2015

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n behalf of all our members we would like to extend to Vi Willers and Kath Harris and their families our deepest sympathy on the passing of Bob, a loving husband, father and grandfather and great grandfather.

Bob was 87 years old and he was married to Vi for 67 years. He was a member of our Club for two years but, unfortunately, due to ill health, was unable to play for the last year.

RIP Bob 44

Happiness I eat my peas with honey I’ve done it all my life It makes the peas “taste” funny But they stick onto my knife – Moira Dean

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Tribute to Cal O’Donnell An Aussie with an Irish heart Our Cal was brave and bold A special man in every way With lineage to be told.

His ancestry was of Royalty Of Kings and Queens no less And when you think of them He’s up there with the best.

He had a regal presence A warmth and smile so true You’d end up with a feeling That special one was you.

I have to mention Bowls The game he loved to play He made hie presence felt A Champ in every way.

And if you had the pleasure Of playing in his team And listen to his words You’d do well upon the Green.

He also loved a tipple A beer he loved the most And now it’s only fitting To offer up this Toast.

To Cal we all salute you And now you’re laid at rest Gone but not forgotten You really were the best.

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– Derek Smith

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feel very proud to be able to write a few words about our dear friend Cal although a few words will never be enough to describe a person of Cal’s calibre.

Like so many people I first met Cal in 2002 when he and May joined our Club. The following year Cal’s voice box was removed due to his illness and thereafter my nickname for this remarkable man was “BRAVE HEART”. He then carried a notepad and pen at all times to communicate with all of us. His body language, facial expressions (especially his eyes) made his notepad and pen redundant at times!

Learning to talk through his trachea came with mixed blessings. It could be a lesson in sheer frustration for Cal, especially in the bowling club where many of us have hearing problems. On these occasions his facial expressions worked overtime!

Our friendship with May and Cal was cemented when we used our senior bus passes to spend a few days each year in Albany, Esperance, Denmark or Kalbarri. My brother and his wife who lived in Scotland joined us on several occasions. We had such good times with so many Calvagh moments that we shall never forget, if laughter is the best

medicine then on those sojourns we achieved just that!

His sense of humour was quite hilarious to those who knew and loved him.

A few friends met Cal and May each Wednesday at the MAAC for dinner.

One year he was so looking forward to having a set of dentures made to enable him to enjoy food other than sloppy meals! These dentures seemed to take forever to make due to the damage caused to Cal’s’ mouth through his treatment. Finally the big night arrived and Cal went into the gents to fit his teeth, we all waited with baited breath and then when he came out and smiled at us, it was a Calvagh moment, he was smiling at us with a set of Dracula plastic teeth, He felt we had waited long enough to view his dentures.

Another social occasion when eight couples from the SBC were together, the conversation turned to our advancing years and the people we knew who had “gone to God”. I could see that Cal wanted to change the subject. He wrote something on his notepad and passed it to me it read “do you know that old George has died?” I asked the group Cal has just told me that old George has died; did any of you know him? They all replied in the negative. Cal I asked who is this old George and with that he pushed his notepad across which read George the Fifth. Needless to say the conversation was changed then and there!

Cal and May lived life to the full, 47

always being first up on the dance floor, being on the our Social Committee. Cal always had his hand up when it came to volunteers being requested. For example he was always there for tiling our rest rooms, rolling our greens, helping with BBQs and working bees whilst all the time coping with his illness.

He had other ops on his nose and ear but to this man they were mere hiccups!

During this period Cal was called upon to council other patients which he carried out with his usual aplomb. In 2014 a major operation was required to the lower half of his body which came as a terrible shock to all, as this man had been through so much. However the 2nd day after the op, he was sitting up in a chair with a big grin on his face but tubes hanging out of every orifice. We were so upset but not “BRAVE HEART”. “May” he said, if you want to play with my willy pull the second tube on the left”.

On Friday 14 August, May and Cal came to the SBC directly after Cal having had more treatment. He sat happily at the head of Table 13 as per usual.

We salute you, “BRAVE HEART” and your attitude to life will remain an inspiration to all that were lucky to pass through your living years!

– Annie Taylor

The “Mystery” of the “Missing” Jack There it was on “Opening Day”, So proud, so white, so shiny!

Waiting to be kissed or smacked Waiting all a quiver for that “Someone special” to deliver.

It came of course and in due time The Skipper bent to place it.

“Kalgoorlie Bowling Club’s” logo, Bright and green Was plain for all to see.

Where had it come from?

Was it a chook?

That brought it back from greens afar, Or was it that Rooster That stowed it safe Within a bag, a trophy, On a fateful day?

Did they score an “eight” you say?

It will reside with Kitty and Jack …..

Till, to Kalgoorlie, we “all” go back.

– Moira Dean “What happens in Kalgoorlie stays in Kalgoorlie” Left: Liz Marshall, Clare Hanlon, and Carmel Hyde in Kalgoorlie 48

Above: Clair Hanlon and Liz Marshall, on the tram to visit the Super pit in Kalgoorlie

Members Celebrating Christmas in July

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In Memory of Bevan Heathcote 1937– 2015

B

evan began his military career when he was in the National Service in 1957.

After doing his three months he decided that he was going to join the regular army and was posted to the 3rd Battalion Royal Australian Regiment at Holsworthy in NSW in 1957.

On 11 October 1957 he arrived in Singapore for 3 RAR’s first tour in Malaya.

The unit was engaged in anti-communist terrorist operations in northern Malaya. The Battalion returned to Brisbane on 14 Oct 1959 and moved to Enoggera Camp just out of Brisbane.

Bevan served his second tour of Malaya in 1963/65 3RAR with “A” company, I was also on that tour but I was in “C” company.

In March 1965 the Battalion was shipped to Borneo for five months to help hold back Indonesian troops from taking over Borneo.

In 1965 we returned to the Woodside Camp in the Adelaide Hills and from there we boarded the HMAS Sydney on 12 December 1967 and arrived at Nui Dat in South Vietnam on 27 December 1967 and 50 carried out many operations to assist South

Vietnam until 20 November 1968.

Bevan served in the Army for 24 years and reached the rank of Warrant Officer Class 1 which was a wonderful achievement. I knew of Bevan during my eight and a half years in 3RAR but didn’t know him personally as we were in different companies (Bevan was in “A” Coy and I was in “C” Coy).

In 1982 he joined the Sorrento Bowling Club with another great guy by the name of Sydney Cragg. Bevan and I became good friends from the start and remained so right up until his death on 16 August 2015 through Pennants, our trips to Wanthella Bowling Club, and the Northam Bowling Club in the earlier days.

Bevan and I often stood at the end of the bar at Sorrento Bowling Club putting down the odd beer or two.

Regarding Syd, he is now in Tuart Lodge at Merriwa RAFFA Village in good condition for his age.

Rest in peace mate.

– John Murphy

Our Club Members in Action

Left above: Mary Rolls, Nora Giles, Hilda Dichiera, Anne Orton and Julie Sabatino “glammed up” for Neville’s 75th Surprise Party Right above: The glamorous ladies were accompanied by six well-dressed men

The Footy Grand Final was televised live on a big screen in conjunction with an Oktoberfest. The festivities started at 10am and went throughout the day. For only $10 you were served, by our delectable Beer Wenches, a glass of wine or middy of beer and a BBQ Bratwurst sausage in a bun with pickled cabbage

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Learn to win or lose with equal grace 54

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Balcatta WA 6021

Call Rod, Lyn Suzee or Lew on 08 9345 2033 or e-mail northlands@helloworld.com.au for all your travel needs.

Cellarbrations Duncraig Shop 6, Duncraig Shopping Centre, 8 Burragah Way Duncraig 55

Trevors Carpets The best knowledge – the biggest range – the right advice Osborne Park 9202 4545 Paul Waite

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