DUAL GRADUATION, p. 26 SUMMER 2015 ISSUE VOLUME 1
TEEN MOM TRIUMPHS
I DARE ME, p. 13
ichoosetowin.org
JOURNEY OF “FIRSTS”
MEET TIFFANY, p. 34 FACE OF I CHOOSE TO WIN
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#ichoose win women living victoriously
CHANGE YOUR MIND: CHANGE YOUR LIFE | FAITH WITHOUT WORKS IS DEAD: TAKE ACTION! | FAITH & FORGIVENESS: LETTER TO HER RAPIST
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#ichoose win WHO WE ARE
MEETOURTEAM
MELONIE BUTLER Founder & Editor
I Choose To Win magazine is a publication that showcases, highlights and promotes positive images and stories of young women who are living boldly, bravely and brilliantly for God‘s glory. By unleashing their God-given gifts, these women are enjoying the fullness of life and inviting others to do the same. Comprised of interviews, motivational messages, spiritual food, advice and announcements, this publication serves to edify, empower and equip our readers who also Choose To Win in life!
FEATURE STORIES & INTERVIEWS
TIPS AND TIDBITS
Inspiring, motivating and uplifting stories promote positive images of everyday women who are boldly, bravely and brilliantly using their God-given gifts. Know someone who should be featured? Have your own story? Submit it.
Fresh ideas, relevant insight, special tips and helpful tidbits are prepared to assist readers who are seeking practical application. Have a tip or a tidbit our readers should consider? We love to hear from our readers. Make your voice heard. Submit it.
SPIRITUAL & INSPIRATIONAL MESSAGES
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Spiritual food is found in the Word. Our inclusion of scriptures, quotes, sayings serve as sweet reminders and an additional resource for inspired thinking.
Any special dates, events or relevant news will be announced for our readers.
CONTACT US For advertising, story submissions, opinions, subscription inquiries, email melonie@ichoosetowin.org. For all written correspondence, I Choose To Win c/o Melonie Butler, P.O. Box 613 Fort Washington, PA 19034. Visit us online at www.ichoosetowin.org for more information. 2 | #ichoosetowin magazine | Summer 2015
FEATURING:
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#ichoose win
everyday women who are winning in life . . .
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Danii Oliver Feeding 1,000 Kids
I Choose To Win: An Inside Look
Shea Holbrook Race Car Driver
Opal Gayle Letter to her Rapist
Alicia Knox Faith & Fitness
Juicing may be a trend for many. But Danii has taken juicing to a new level - advocacy for healthy food choices in schools and homes. Find out how and why she plans to feed 1,000 children with juice.
Is it an organization, a magazine, a program or a retreat? What is it? Learn more about I Choose To Win: background, mission, vision and ways it‘s helping young women choose victory. Read on.
A trailblazing race car driver opens up about how racing helps her to help others. Her race platform helps raise awareness and funds for children suffering from a fatal disorder.
The letter she wrote to her rapist demonstrates her faith and freedom found in forgiveness. In a heartfelt letter, she released the stronghold of bondage in exchange for internal peace.
Our beliefs influence the actions we take - true with our bodies and in life. Alicia discusses her personal fitness goals and stepping out on faith to change her career to become a fitness coach.
Photo Credit: House of Juice
FEEDING 1,000 KIDS
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PASSION TURNED PURPOSE: JUICING TO IMPACT THE WORLD
uice is her business. But, it hadn’t always been. During the pregnancy of her first-born child, the then twenty-eight-year old, Danii Oliver began to drink, rather than eat, her daily supply of fruits and vegetables. This more than doubled her intake of nutrition. In doing so, she experienced the benefits of a fully nourished body: felt lighter, less bloated, fewer headaches and mood swings, sick less often, more energy and improved mental clarity. What started off as an attempt to eat healthy for the baby growing inside her, turned into a positive lifestyle change. Thanks to juicing, eating raw foods, and incorporating daily exercise, Danii lost a noteworthy 80 pounds - and felt better overall. Her new lifestyle was healthy, proven and successful. In an attempt to share it with others, she opened House of Juice in Brooklyn, NY. Danii’s plans far exceed selling a bunch of juice and making a ton of money. Instead, she is passionate about establishing a platform to advocate for healthier food choices for children. As a company initiative, she is raising money to feed 1,000 children her organic, cold-pressed beverages in order to invite the love of nutritious foods while changing kids’ minds about eating healthy. Read on to understand why. 4 | #ichoosetowin magazine | Summer 2015
FEATURE STORY | FEEDING 1,000 KIDS
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I want to serve 1,000 kids in Brooklyn and beyond. Danii Oliver, 30 Owner, House of Juice Brooklyn, NY
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o shortage of confidence. No limits in her mind as to what she can achieve. She exhibits the boldness, braveness and brilliance that the I Choose To Win‘s “be3“ campaign promotes. This millennial woman is about her health, her daughter, her marriage and her businesses. Yes, you read that right, plural. Before becoming a co-owner of House of Juice, Danii owned a digital consulting business. chose to start this business because it became required of me,“ the juice mixologist explains, “it takes two hours for us to drive back and forth to the grocery store to buy organic produce to maintain our lifestyle, and the
“I
reality is not everyone can travel that distance to get fresh produce weekly.“ While distance should not preclude others from getting what they need, oftentimes it does. “I think my success story exists because I experimented with not eating what was conveniently available but went out of my way to make better choices,“ she shares. In her New York neighborhood, the lack of availability
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Don‘t take NO from someone who can‘t tell you YES! and limited access to better food options are partly the reasons many who desire a healthy lifestyle are unable to attain it. House of Juice hopes to change that with its new storefront location providing healthy options to
those living and working down the street and around the corner. tarting a business is an adventurous feat, one that is slightly frustrating and scary, but equally rewarding. The 120-pound ambitious leader opens up about the mindset she carries into each venture, “I don‘t believe there is anything I cannot do. My strengths, my thoughts, my ideas, my creativity are all mine - unlike any one else‘s.“ Her can-do attitude is directly linked to a quote learned from her high school fine arts teacher and
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Summer2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 5
(Continued from previous page)
practiced through her daily living:“Don‘t take NO from someone who can‘t tell you YES.“ ull-time mom, wife, and savvy business owner explains that she wants to change the way adults and children look at fruits and veggies. In addition to lack of access and availabilty, another barrier to making healthy food choices is attitude. Too often, adults, who dislike veggies, project that line of thinking onto their children. When kids adopt that mindset, they are more likely to reject healthy food choices and grow reluctant to explore fresh produce because they believe they don‘t like them. Danii‘s daughter, now 2-years-old, is a vegan and is proof that children exposed to fruits and vegetables can truly love them. But, that‘s all she knows. Explaining her mission with feeding 1,000 children, Danii states, “my goal is to expose children to foods which they may not have access and to widen their palettes to more than meats and starches, which is what makes up many children‘s diets.“ ther children, less familiar with raw foods or nutritious options, do not possess the same admiration for the natural tastes as her daughter, per se. But Danii gets that, too, and has a solution. Through fun presentation, cool packaging, bright colors and tasty combinations, Oliver plans to expose children, and adults alike, to a new experience - one she believes all will truly enjoy. Displaying healthy mocktails in martini glasses and yummy fruit puree bowls are just a few ways she entices newbies to give it a try. Showcasing her tasty beverages at trade shows, health fairs, schools and creative events, she is building an audience and gaining a following, proving that when exposed, people can change their minds - and their behaviors.
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Photo Credit: House of Juice
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ouse of Juice will be teaching & feeding 1,000 kids each month with juices, smoothies and mini plant food workshops. House of Juice helps nursing mothers by providing them with recipes and food items that can aid in lactation and further encourage mothers to feed their babies naturally. House of Juice is helping working parents by providing no-questions-asked whole food nutrition for everyone in the family. Because of House of Juice‘s urban location, working men and women on the go will no longer need to neglect their health by consuming highly processed quick grab packaged items. They will have better choices and healthy options available to them in an area that didn‘t have access. If you would like to help Danii achieve her goal of feeding 1,000 kids in Brooklyn and beyond, visit her site to donate toward her mission: www.houseofjuicebk.com. - MB
TIPS & TIDBITS | Choice. Attitude. Action.
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he moment you realize that winning and losing are not only outcomes, but more importantly choices. That is the moment you’re confronted with the decision - to choose! We choose everyday, several times per day how we will approach the day, the attitude we have during the day, the tasks we will complete within the day and how much we expect from ourselves before the close of the day. he will to win in any task begins first with a choice. It’s followed quickly by an attitude that anticipates the completion of the task. The winning attitude is incredibly optimistic, welcoming and encouraging. Then, it requires the actions of undertaking the task(s). Before you know it, upon the completion of each small task, you experience winning. Over and over again. t’s as simple as these three steps: First, choose your win. Next, align your attitude in anticipation of your win. Last, complete the actions required to experience the WIN! Winning is realizing the potential within you for greatness - and acting on it. With God being your creator, and His purpose revealed in you, it’s truly a matter of will-power, trust and obedience to unleash your God-given gifts for His Glory. We each possess a bit of greatness within us, for God is great, almighty and awesome. We were formed in His image. Individually, we are victorious. Collectively, we are more than conquerors. While the victory is truly His, He let’s us live it out. In life, choose to win and you will do just that, WIN. - MB
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JOIN US Grow in confidence. Build esteem. Reassess value & significance. You were created with purpose, in your own unique way to positively impact the world. Let’s do something bold. Let’s start a movement of women who win! First, we must choose.
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what if? What if a generation of women truly believed God and His promises with renewed vigor and trust? What if they saw themselves as significant, purposed, and equipped to do what they’ve been called to do? What if this generation of women believed what God – and not society – says about them? What if they looked into the mirror and saw their true boldness, braveness and brilliance by God’s design? Let’s stop asking ‘what if?’ Join the movement of women who choose to win.
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CHANGE YOUR MIND. CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
by Melonie Butler
Calling all women. This is an urgent call to wake up and begin to live each day to the fullest. Too many of us are losing our flavor, quieting our voices and suppressing our passions. The world needs us to be exactly who we‘ve been created to be - nothing more, nothing less. When we accept mediocrity, live complacently and delay our hopes and dreams, we, collectively, wither away and subject ourselves, our spouses, our children and our communities to passionless living - a mundane existence that is not God-honoring. Fellow women, let this serve as a reminder that we are beautiful, bold, brave and brilliant creatures created, by God himself, to do incredible things in this world for His glory. We are purposed to be influencers, educators, nurturers, encouragers, supporters, inventors, leaders, activists, advocates, wives and mothers, just to name a few. We are made in the image of God. And, as we read in Psalm 139, we‘re reminded that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. This means we are intentionally designed, uniquely created, purposefully crafted, properly equipped to do and be exactly who God has called us.
Whatever He wants from us, He‘s already placed in us and designed us to succeed in it. We need to open our eyes to see and cause our ears to hear when we ask Him to reveal His purpose for us. Wrap your head around that. And let‘s begin living it. God loves you. He invites you to love the creature he created, called You. When you love yourself - and all the things that make you different, or unique, then it‘s more likely you will begin to appreciate the person to your left and right, realizing they are creatures, just like you, with contributions to offer the world, too. Love is a gift: one we first received, and one we continuously give away. With each of us being molded through diverse (not always favorable) circumstances, environments, backgrounds and situations, He has equipped each of us with a story, a perspective, a yearning, an internal desire, a spark, a passion, a purpose and a gift to impact others. It‘s our response, in obedience to His will, that pushes us into the realm of living out loud and on purpose. We must change our minds about how we view God, ourselves and others. Change your mind. Change your life. Operate in your gifts. Live your purpose. In life, Win! Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 9
TIPS & TIDBITS | AN INSIDE LOOK INTO I CHOOSE TO WIN
ANINSIDELOOK!
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Choose To Win Is a program whose mission is to motivate and inspire a generation of young women to walk boldly, brightly and brilliantly in their God-given gifts – contributing in unique ways to impact the world in which we live. This is what we’ve coined as “winning.”
ORGANIZATION
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non-profit organization providing motivational and inspirational messaging and programming for the edification, empowerment and equipment of young women on mission to win in life. It offers motivational speaking, uplifting publications, social events and connection (online and in-person).
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PROGRAM
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Choose To Win is a program that seeks to motivate and inspire women to walk boldly, brightly and brilliantly in their God-given gifts. Through inspired activities and creative programming, women are able to carve for themselves what a winning life looks like. We facilitate clear decision-making, goal setting, action planning, resource sharing & connection.
MAGAZINE
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he seasonal e-publication is a platform and a voice for women who are on personal journeys to win. It showcases, highlights and promotes positive images and stories of everyday women who are winning. As a tool, the magazine offers practical tips and tidbits, scriptural references and motivational messages to empower and equip readers on their journey.
SAVE THE DATE
ONE DAY WINNING WORKSHOPS SATURDAY JULY 11 2015 SATURDAY AUG 1 2015 REGISTER ONLINE
SOCIAL NETWORK
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nline social networks (including Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Linkedin) feature, highlight and profile women as winners. Also a storehouse of advice and information, I Choose To Win social networks deliver online connectivity (mentoring, network building and resource sharing) for offline action, aka winning. It’s women edifying women.
RETREAT & WORKSHOPS
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inning weekends, aka three-day retreat or one-day workshop, is where young women from diverse backgrounds come together to define what winning means to them. Using creativity as a path for teaching, the program seeks to build confidence, boost esteem, promote connection and mutual edification. In engaging group activities and quiet time alone, individual growth takes place.
CAMPAIGN & MANTRA
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he “I Choose To Win” campaign causes women to see themselves as winners. It is a mantra and a mindset that is adopted and employed by women for its power to be experienced. The statement, I Choose To Win, is a bold declaration of victory. It is a clear announcement of one’s expectation out of life. It’s life-giving! It’s speaking and expecting victory over life’s battles.
ichoosetowin.org
Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 11
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PROUD SUPPORTER OF I CHOOSE TO WIN!
Ever say to yourself, “I dare me?” If not, maybe it’s time you did.
I DARE ME
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k. She’s no millennial, but her story was certainly inspired by one: her daughter. If her book does for you, what it has done for her, you may find yourself unstuck and choosing to win in life!
Photo Courtesy of Lu Ann Cahn
LU ANN CAHN
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u Ann Cahn, a Philadelphia area celebrity, is also an everyday woman, like you and me. She’s an author, wife, mother and career woman, but she’ll always be known for her 26 years serving as an award-winning broadcast journalist with WCAU-TV, NBC 10 Philadelphia. After releasing her first book, I Dare Me: How I rebooted and Recharged My Life Doing Something New Every Day, the TV journalist embarked upon a second career: author, blogger and speaker. The book was first a blog, an idea given by her daughter to try something new each day and record it as a way of helping her mom get, what she called, “unstuck.”
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n a recent interview, Cahn shared a little of the backstory. Recalling a phase where she was grateful for life, having been a two-time cancer survivor amid overcoming other serious health concerns, but for reasons unknown to her, she was “going through” – feeling miserable and uncertain why. Having once there myself, I understood the phase she described. For Cahn, her daughter was her saving grace. (Continued on next page) Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 13
(Continued from previous page)
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t first, committing to the idea of the blog was a journey in itself. In order to get started, it required the full-time TV journalist carve hours from her jampacked days. Needing a website, learning social media, creating a blog, and, uh, doing something new each day, seemed to be daunting tasks. Equally, they seemed exciting, as they were necessary for starting something new. Cahn could have procrastinated, instead she chose to go with it. For 365 days, she did something new – big and small – and blogged her experience. With each blog entry, she built a following and learned just how inspiring her journey was for others, who also embarked upon their own journey of “firsts.” With a strong audience and an energetic movement of dares, her blog soon turned into a book deal: I Dare Me. This idea, generated by her then 23-yearold daughter, helped Cahn engage life more boldly and fully – and catapulted a second career. oral of the story: While we younger women often look to our mothers and maternal figures for inspiration and
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Lu Ann Cahn
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I recharged my life doing something new every day.
encouragement, the truth is, we may be the source of motivation and inspiration they need. Let’s pay attention to those around us to see if we can be that for the women in our own spheres of influence. hoosing to win is choosing to edify, empower and equip others on the journey. While it’s up to you whether or not to begin your own journey of personal “firsts” or “dares,” the reality is anything you’ve never done before is an adventure you’ll never experience. Be bold. Do something you’ve always wanted to do. Be brave. Prove courage is better than fear. Growth lives in the moments you do. Here‘s the thing . . . we do it for work, we do it for others, how about we do something for us – and fall in love with life while unraveling the mystery of you. njoy all that life has to offer, each and every day – by incorporating firsts, and personal dares. Make a personal decision - to win.
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ant to purchase the book for yourself or as a gift for someone who could use a recharge? Look for it at Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other book retailers. Or, visit luanncahn.com. f you embark upon your own journey of firsts or dares, let us know how it goes: facebook.com/ ichoosetowin.org. - MB
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FEATURE STORY | RACING FOR A CAUSE
RACE CAR DRIVER
MEET SHEA HOLBROOK Professional race car driver, Shea Holbrook, 25, is a young woman who is winning in life: by our definition and hers. At the age of 5, she announced she would be a race car driver when she grew up. However, it wasn‘t until the sweet age of 16 did she profess this with absolute certainty. Through the support of her first official sponsor, MD&F, which stands for Mom, Dad and Friends, she got her first race car on the track of the Pirelli World Challenge (PWC) race series in St. Petersburg, FL. However, it was at the prestigious Long Beach Grand Prix Street Race in 2011, where Holbrook experienced her first professional win and declared herself a true contender on the track. “Once you have that taste, you can‘t get it out of your mouth,” Holbrook says of that milestone event.
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Photos Submitted by Shea Holbrook
Shea Holbrook Co-Owner, Shea Racing Windermere, FL
try to have at least one family with a child affected by Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy at every race. Through racing, I help raise awareness of the disorder while raising funds to support these families. I’m just grateful to help create memories: fun, lasting memories for the whole family. They experience the world of motorsports up close and personal for an exciting time.”
to get started, the need for sponsors was imminent. Painting a picture of the upfront costs required for entry into motorsports, Shea chuckled while explaining an industry saying, “If you want to make a million in motorsports, start with two!” ecalling a pivotal encounter she had with her father, Jeff Holbrook, which set her on the right track, Shea remembered her first motorports convention in her hometown of Orlando, FL. The event, designed for race enthusiasts, took place over a span of 3 days. Shea‘s dad purchased her ticket to attend, tasked her with connecting with people (collecting business cards) and instructed her to make her 30 second elevator pitch that went something like, “My name is Shea Holbrook, I am passionate about racing and am looking for sponsors to support my dream of racing professionally.” t age 16, she admits being a bit of a dare devil, primarily attributed to her previous sport of competitive water skiing. And, it‘s likely she possessed a level of confidence atypical for someone her age. In this primarily male dominated space, she was alone - a young woman in an unfamiliar environment to perform an unfamiliar task. Dad waited at home to learn how her day went. Day one, she remembers telling him she failed at connecting with others and delivering her elevator pitch. Day two, similar story, but she grew in confidence. Day three, she realized, for every 350 NO‘s, she would get 1 Yes. The character building journey of receiving more no‘s than yes‘ built within her determination, perseverance, drive, tough skin and assertiveness, all of which were necessary for her impending success as a young female race car driver and business owner, capable of holding her own, in the male-dominated industry of motorsports. his highly motivated and sincere young woman races with internal joy.
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2011 Long Beach Grand Prix
ine years since her decision to pursue N racing professionally, Shea Holbrook is an accomplished driver, notable
spokeswoman and co-owner of Shea Racing, a multi-car and multi-driver team. The tenacious young woman who knows what she wants and is willing to do the work to get it, is still dreaming - imagining the brightness of her future. hen asked what her vision of winning looked like, the ambitious race car driver responded immediately, with no hesitation, this candid reply, “I would be driving, have sponsors lined up, be fully funded, supporting a charitable cause and giving amazing opportunities to exceptionally talented drivers who are also genuinely good people, the kind that would open the door for the elderly when no one was looking, to race under my platform.” er compassion for the under-resourced driver is rooted in her own experience. As an only child, Shea revealed her dream of becoming a race car driver with her parents, Jeff and Erin Holbrook, both of whom encouraged and supported her aspirations. However, being from a middle class family, the cost of this new journey required a larger pocketbook than they possessed. Relying on family and friends to pool resources in order to make a way for Shea
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Pictured: Jordan, Shea and Jordan’s Dog, Patriot
Joy because she enjoys the thrill of living her dream. And, joy because she can pay it forward for a cause near and dear to her heart. Paying it forward is the phrase Shea uses when supporting charitable causes and giving back to the community. In 2008, Shea lost a cousin, Matthew, to Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD), a genetic disorder diagnosed in childhood. With no known cure, the fatal disorder mostly affects young men. It leads to progressive muscle weakness along with other serious medical problems. In 2015, another cousin, Jordan, pictured with Shea above, also suffers from the same disorder. Partnering with Parent Project Muscular Dystrophy, a nonprofit organization, Shea Racing hosts families affected by this genetic disorder at racing events and gives them lasting memories to share together. try to have at least one family with a child affected by Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy at every race. Through racing, I help raise awareness of the disorder while raising funds to support these families. I‘m just grateful to help create memories: fun, lasting memories for the whole family. They experience the world of motorsports up close and personal for an exciting time.” et‘s cheer for this good-hearted, goal oriented, driven woman from the stands or from a distance. Find Shea‘s race schedule on her website shearacing.com or watch CBS Sports when the Pirelli World Challenge race series airs. - MB
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18 | #ichoosetowin magazine | Summer 2015
I’M DONE.
LETTING FEAR HOLD ME BACK. WANTING MORE & ACCEPTING LESS. RECEIVING & NOT GIVING. HOLDING GRUDGES. BEING
MEDIOCRE. THINKING SMALL. TRYING TO FIT IN.
WAITING FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO STEP UP. NOT BEING TRUE TO MYSELF.
LIVING COMPLACENTLY. PROCRASTINATING. WONDERING WHAT “IF” & DOING NOTHING TO FIND OUT. PEOPLE PLEASING. SEEKING APPROVAL FROM OTHERS. BURYING MY YEARNINGS AND DESIRES. FEEDING MYSELF PESSIMISTIC THOUGHTS. PLAYING SMALL. IGNORING MY INNER VOICE. DENYING MY BLESSINGS. REMAINING A VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCES. WITHHOLDING LOVE & AFFECTION. SAYING & BELIEVING “I CAN’T.”
DELAYING MY HOPES & DREAMS.
BEING SELFISH. BLAMING OTHERS. DELIVERING LESS THAN MY BEST. GIVING EXCUSES.SUPPRESSING MY PASSIONS. HANGING OUT WITH NAYSAYERS. LIVING IN MY COMFORT ZONE.
WORKING HARD AND ACCOMPLISHING NOTHING OF TRUE VALUE.
In life,
! Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 19
FAITHINACTION Actions rooted in belief, activate faith. Let’s demonstrate our faith through our actions. Melonie Butler, Founder of I Choose To Win, an organization helping young women unleash their God-given gifts to impact the world, explains a firsthand account of her personal tie to the mission of I Choose To Win - what it meant to her, what God revealed and why she’s sharing it with women everywhere. Believing the biblical reference,“Faith without works is dead,” learn how the idea of I Choose To Win became an action plan that was executed before the program could begin.
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It quickly trasformed from something meant for me into something meant for me to share with other women - MB
choose to win. These were four words given to me during quiet moments I carved to hear from God. Not knowing what the phrase meant, I began dissecting each word to understand what maybe God was trying to tell me. I prayed over it. I asked for clarity about what it meant. I rummaged the Bible as if looking for lost car keys, I sought anything and everything about winning or victory. Each morning, I recited it. Those four words were at the forefront of my mind. It wasn‘t long before those tightly packed words became my personal mission statement. Today, that phrase has become a real life mission for me. I tasked myself with writing down each area of my life I wanted God to bring forth victory. I prayed about each area and asked God to reveal His will and issue His help. I did this long enough to realize the power of speaking life and victory into situations and relationships. I changed my
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outlook and attitude to reflect the outcome. If I choose to win, I must own the mindset of someone who‘s winning. I had to see myself as a winner, someone experiencing victory in the making. I was completely engrossed in God - and what He was showing me about my life, my choices, my attitude and my actions. his phrase was mine just long enough to remind me who I was and whose I was. I am victorious in Christ, therefore, I win in this life. This mantra, or mission statement became a weapon against spiritual and emotional warfare, such as self-doubt, feelings of insignificance and insecurities during a period of time when I was going through. God opened my eyes and caused me to see many other women, like myself who needed a word, a challenge, a reminder and a support system to transition in mindset from that of a victim to that of a victor. The mantra
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I Choose To Win quickly transformed from something meant for me - to something for me to share with other women everywhere. ower lives in those four words. Say it to yourself aloud. Then, take a minute to believe it. Say it again - and add to it. For example, I Choose to Win in my personal life, I Choose To Win in my marriage, I choose victory over pain, I Choose God above all. You realize the choice is yours. It‘s always been up to you to choose. It‘s a mindset. It‘s focus. It‘s a statement of boldness, an announcement of one‘s expectation out of life. It‘s owning the victory we‘re promised in Christ. It‘s a game changer for those who have been victimized and struggling to get past the hurt, pain and emotional scars of life. It‘s a movement of women choosing, thinking and behaving victoriously for God‘s glory. Join us at ichoosetowin.org. - MB
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Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 21
“
Fear is a state of mind.
Wil is an action taken.
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MEET SHEA HOLBROOK “Everyone likes to use someone else’s motivational quote. My dad and I decided to create one of our own. Our motto is: ‘Fear is a state of mind. Will is an action taken.’” - Shea Holbrook Race Car Driver & Co-Owner of Shea Racing
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be
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BOLD. BRAVE. BRILLIANT.
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BOLD. It is being convinced, convicted and confident in whose you are and the purpose placed in you. It’s being okay with God‘s design and being unapologetic about being exactly who you are. So, unleash your gifts to impact the world. Unravel the mystery of you - find out what He tucked inside when He formed you. Pursue your path. Live on purpose. Do You!
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BE
Not because you feel like it. Because you are called to be!
BRAVE. It’s releasing courage in the face of conflict, injustice and undeniable obstacles that appear greater than your known propensity to deal. It’s not knowing the outcome, but doing the “right” thing while you have a chance. It’s standing up for something you believe in, even if you are standing alone. Courage is within you. You must give permission to let it out.
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BRILLIANT. It is the shining of your inner spirit that radiates outwardly. It‘s illuminating from within and generously permeating your environment for others to witness. Brilliance brightens the world. It’s knowing and loving God, yourself and others too. One is given the gift of light, which is meant to be given away. Shimmer, Shine, Exude! Go and glow in the Lord.
Laughter is not only the best medicine, it’s the universal language of joy. Smile. Laugh out loud. Enjoy life. Share your joy!
ichoosetowin.org By design, you have been custom-built to achieve a purpose of significance, which you are on mission to discover and uncover throughout your lifetime. Until such a time when your purpose has been fulfilled, every living moment becomes part of a bigger journey. And every journey leaves a trail of experiences that help to define the gifts, talents, skills and perspectives placed in you that will cause you to be effective for God‘s purpose in your life. Once revealed, it’s up to you to unleash your gifts for God’s glory. Here‘s a personal challenge: Do not shrink back Pictured: Tiffany Burrows
in fear. Do not diminish the significance of your gift(s). Do not play it down. Do not lack confidence. Do not be conformed. Be bold, brave and brilliant. In doing this, you will also find yourself confident, intentional and effective. Give 100% effort every time. Whether speaking, singing, dancing, drawing, teaching, coaching, serving, laboring, playing an instrument, leading or healing – do your absolute best as unto the Lord. The hidden treasures that await include joy, excitement, internal satisfaction, greater meaning and peace. Let us know how it goes. Share with us at - MB facebook.com/ichoosetowin.org. Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 25
AGAINST ALL ODDS
JANICE DURRANT:
A TEEN MOM SUCCESS Janice Durrant, age 22, graduated with her Bachelor of Arts Degree from Temple University, School of Media and Communication, proving to herself, her daughter and the world that a teen mom with drive, determination and discipline, can achieve societal success - even when all odds are against her. Today, she aspires to be the leading example, in America and abroad, that teen mothers can succeed. Headed to Peru for the summer, Janice is working with teenage mothers while also completing her concentration in international communication.
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Photo Credit: Ryan Powell
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I refuse to leave her behind.
Being a teenage mother at the age of 15 proved to be a life-altering experience for this young woman. Through this experience she gained a perspective that would shape her passion and purpose in life. Durrant learned her voice and her resolve to help and encourage teen parents, who like her, were offered limiting options of abortion, adoption and welfare, but little support in parenting, housing, education or raising a child. Sharing her frustration, Durrant explains, “There are tons of programs that teach about protective sex. Once pregnant, though, we need more programs that teach how to parent, while also giving a solid understanding about the reality of what it takes to stay afloat as a parent.” During her sophomore year, this bold, brave and brilliant young lady created a mantra, “Stand Up, Be Confident and Move,” which served as a reminder to herself that she had to stand up against societal norms, be confident that she could produce more than what‘s expected and move on to what it means to be rich, not with money, but in spirit and tenacity in order to succeed. “One way that I hope to positively impact the world is by changing the depiction of teenage mothers. We need our youth. The children are our future. We need education. Combined, teen parenting is one of the top 5 reasons people do not graduate. It is my duty to decrease that number, so we are no longer listing [pregnancy or parenting] as a reason ladies are dropping out. I have to supply support. In the future, I want universities to have day cares centers. We do not only need diplomas, we need degrees,” Durrant stated when envisioning the future and her role in it.
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Photo Credit: Ryan Powell
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ithout condoning teenage pregnancy, the reality is - it happens. The question is, when it happens, what then? Do we respond with condemnation and judgment, associate failure with that individual, offer support for the parents and/or list options for the baby? Janice Durrant is a great example and reason for this conversation. Raised in a single parent household, her father was incarcerated and her mother worked several jobs to provide for her four children. “Her work ethic made me love the woman she was,” recalls Durrant, “I knew to look for notes in the morning and money under the lamp,” she spoke of her mother‘s care and provision. Durrant played the role of caregiver to her siblings while maintaining stellar grades in the academically gifted program at her school. Oftentimes alone and feeling lonely, teenage Durrant found comfort and security in boys, one who would become the father of her child. ainting a picture of what life was like growing up, she sums, “To my mom I was an angel, to my grandmother I was a handful, to my father – I am not sure what I was, to my school I was a loud, yet wise young lady, and to myself I was lost. To the boys in my neighborhood, I was a piece of meat. But to me they were security. Being with a boy was the only time I felt safe. I never realized they did not feel the same. Sadly, this is the lifestyle of a lot of young ladies; I hope they
The year 2015 marks a milestone for both mom, Janice, 22 graduating from Temple University and daughter Liani, 6, graduating from kindergarten, who both coincidentally share an owl as school mascots.
do not realize their worth too late.” eing 15 and pregnant, she was dissappointed and slightly ashamed, as this was her second pregnancy: the first she aborted only a year earlier. This pregancy she hid for six-and-a-half months before her mother found out. Upon learning how far along she was, the options were limited. Pregnant Durrant selected an adoptive family, but the paperwork did not go through - and Liani, her daughter, was born. She decided to raise her baby girl,
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which was a jeopardizing decision as she understood she was unable to do so from home. House hopping and staying with friends, she struggled tremendously throughout her years as a student, parent and provider. Durrant does not hide how difficult life was, in fact she candidly shares her rock bottoms: “my mother moved out of state, my boyfriend who supported us passed away, the welfare office cut me off, and I had to ask to move in with someone over and over again.” It seemed the odds were against her. o provide for her daughter, the high school student took a part-time job at Philadelphia Freedom Schools, which changed her life for the better. Surrounded by affluent people of color, college educated mentors, community advocates and other black elite, she was edified, empowered and equipped. Shedding light on the impact of this experience, she™ says, “They took me in and challenged me. When I started blogging, one lady told me I needed a sign off. I sat long and hard for a few weeks and came up with my philosophy, “Stand Up, Be Confident and ™ Move.” This was the beginning JMDof Durrant‘s blogging (JaniceMDurrant.com) career to inspire other teenage mothers who identified with her struggles - and needed a source of encouragement that they, too, can make it. With thousands of followers on her collective social sites, this young mom confesses, “I never wanted to accept this title [teenage mother], but it is my duty.” (Continued on next page)
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n International Communication Studies major, Durrant describes her God-given gift as, “my ability to connect with people and inspire,” explaining futher she says, “Through encounters, I have been able to remind people of their worth. I have no filter. And, I have a smile that many people love. I make people who feel small remember why they are big,” says Durrant. egarding faith, she explains, “I always believed in God. Honestly, I believe that I tried to do everything in this world, but give my all to God. I started to pray and understand that I am highly favored. I know, now, that I am covered.“ hen asked about what she does to ensure her six-year-old daughter Liani remains a priority amongst her many competing demands of blogging, studying and working, Janice states, “I attend her ballet practice and we have ice cream/dinner outings. I am the sole provider for my daughter. We do everything together. I refuse to leave her behind. She had to spend nights with me in the library. I would cry about it, but now that I graduated I cannot thank her enough,” says Durrant. s. Durrant‘s future plans are as bright as her current milestones. “I want to receive my doctrine in African American Studies. It is a discipline that can educate me more about my
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roots. My mother is Puerto Rican and my dad was born and raised in Trinidad. I was always confused, but now I am wiser. I believe the more rooted I was in my community, the stronger I became. In order to be a game changer for teenage mothers, I have to keep going. I applied to school on my own. I paid for my application fees and I was only 18-years-old. Now, at age 22, I can keep going. I have to. As a first generation graduate, I am a great example for my daughter.” urrant has studied abroad (South Africa) to gain a global perspective of many issues, of which, one she held dear and made personal, teenage motherhood. It was while there, Janice discovered her knack for motivational speaking and uplifting young mothers in group settings and in one-on-one encounters. This summer 2015, she is studying in Peru for completion of her concentration in international communication, commencement in August 2015. There, she plans to work with teenage mothers. On a mission to end the days where “teenage parenting coincides with failure,” the savvy inspiration wanted to address a few constituents: Elderly – Share your wisdom. We are not the generation that does not care. I cared, but no one educated me. If you want teen mothers to remember goals that need to be achieved, enlighten us. I had no clue what I was doing. Granted, sexual
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behavior can result in pregnancy; yet, this leaves room to explore, I needed to be reminded that my body is a temple. Society – There are tons of programs that teach about protective sex. Though, when pregnant, we need more programs that teach people how to parent, while also giving people the reality of what it takes to stay afloat as a parent. Successful teen parents – Ranging from Solange to Fantastia, we need you. My goal is to be the leading example, in America and abroad, that teen mothers can succeed. Yet, we have plenty of teen mothers who are successful. I use to be scared to talk about it, but it is in my power to have my voice heard in order to make a difference.“ o learn more about Janice M. Durrant, or to follow her personally, find her contact information below. Closing with a suitable quote found on her website: “When you live by action phrases, you put action into place.“ - MB
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Blog: janiceMdurrant.com Instagram: @Ms. Durrant Facebook: Janice M. Durrant
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Join the movement ladies! #ichoosetowin #boldbravebrilliant
be
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BOLD. BRAVE. BRILLIANT.
Not because you feel like it. Because you were created to be!
t s i p a r r e h o t Letter
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SS FAITH & FORGIVENE
Dear Mark,
be forced to u did, you will not yo if en ev d an r te this let gs. My ears numb ably never receive endure many thin ob to pr ll ed u’ rc fo Yo en be ve it,” they all say, it. I ha ore time. “Get over as forced to write m w I e on gh e ou m th ct it, di in ad at re ts th member you every everyone’s though g. I am forced to re rin from the silence of be em rced to ask m re to in onement). I was fo and forced at ed of am ay sh (d as os w I rt t ue bu de los m when asked by a own personal dia yself in the mirror m at e ar st to ed October 13th, my d pretty his as forc ething wrong? I w Look how brown an u? yo e lik l ga ny myself if I did som ” a bo ough to be raped? hy would Mark rape , “am I not good en elf neighbor, “now w g raped by ys in m k be r as te to af s ed I was forc than 14 year e or m y, da to at girlfriend is.” Then th ion you would tell you untless times I envis co e th of If you were here, I u yo ll te would now having a If you were here, I you would do this e in ag im I e. ar u you I am not mad. rry yo d yes, I would d telling me how so you were here – an If s. ay w ur yo embracing me, an of r powerless – I n, realizing the erro ry and I would be ito rr te ed nd ou w is daughter of your ow there ead of the here because back ossomed into, inst bl ve ed ha I an om prefer for it to be w ure ve that I would sh see me for the mat u were here, I belie yo If .” et cr se would want you to ur ep “o rl who couldn’t ke nce that day. yI frightened little gi ho lost her innoce w fighting, and toda rl gi tle lit e th r fo ar spent many years te ve ha re I afi y. t gr se an to a perfunctory er let “R,” mad, no long elf free of the scar ys m b But, I am no longer ru y sc pl to sim s ar to se r ye tim. Today, I choo e. I have fought fo e that I’m still a vic m declare that I am fre ce power to take, in ur nv yo co ed ely us tiv u rves to ac ays be. Yo alw ill n w u yo ; ng every altar that se ro ere w ss, nor an invitatio the poison. You w you is neither a pa to nd te ex I ss e… forgive, to release ne m is ive t be destroyed. It rgive. But, this forg ed, choosing to no I will use mine to fo um ns co be t no to - Opal choosing e, I choose to win! to dinner. It is my choosing life. In lif
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You used your power to take, I use mine to forgive!
#ichoosetowin #boldbravebrilliant
be
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BOLD. BRAVE. BRILLIANT. Not because you feel like it. Because you were called to be!
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ike many young women who become wives and mothers before discovering their passion, Alicia Knox, of Abington PA, focused on raising her family: husband and two children. Through the years, and in the midst of her daily tasks, she admits, “I lost me!” Alicia was 30 when she woke up to the fact that there was something untapped inside her. She decided to explore herself - intrigue, curiosity, passion - to understand her unique purpose in life outside of her roles of mommy and wife. She learned that her passion lived in the realm of health and fitness, so she began to search for her “it!”
Alicia Knox Personal Trainer & Fitness Coach Abington, PA
PURSUING A PATH
UNIQUELYMINE
FAITH AND FITNESS: Alicia Knox shares her journey into the world of body building and her steps to entrepreneurship.
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Photo Submitted by Alicia Knox
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ow, a certified massage therapist, personal trainer and nutrition counselor, this mother of two sons continues to push herself in the spirit of 1st Corinthians 9:24-26, which states: “Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.” Alicia chose 2015 as her year. This year she is walking in faith and trusting God for all of His promises as she prepares
“I didn‘t know how brave I was
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until I did my first figure show!
REALTALK . . . How brave are you?
Photo Submitted by Shay Hope
FEATURE STORY |FAITH AND FITNESS
ichoosetowin.org to leave full-time employment to become the fitness coach she feels called to be. As a fitness coach and personal trainer, Alicia explains, “God has allowed me to meet some very wonderful people who have had a huge impact on my life! He has also allowed me to impact the lives of others in meaningful ways.” rs. Knox reminds us that “God has given us all different gifts. In order to share them with others as he ordained, we must be BOLD, BRAVE and BRILLIANT.” And, in revealing her personal story where she uncovered the courage within, she states, “I didn’t know how brave I really was until I did my first Figure show! It was very scary and I did not expect to win a thing! In fact, before I got on stage, I was discouraged by someone who suggested I not move forward,” Alicia continued, “But God gave me a husband who believed in me, encouraged me and reminded me that I had nothing to lose! I was a winner for just getting on stage! I did and came home with a 5th place trophy!” ou can find Alicia Knox in the Abington, PA area, where she is embarking upon her path to entrepreneurship. Through boot camps, personal training sessions, and nutritious meal prep sessions, Alicia helps people transition to a healthier and more active lifestyle. -MB
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SHAY HOPE alwaysbeyou.info
learned just how brave I could be when I ended my engagement. Definitely one of the hardest decisions of my life. I was at a crossroads in my life and I was drowning in emotional warfare. I thought that it was just pre-wedding jitters and I’d get over it once we recited our vows. But the closer I got to the wedding date, the worse I felt. My ex and I went through some very difficult times, and marriage was not going to erase the memories. I realized, begrudgingly, that love alone cannot sustain a marriage and I had to let go before we both ended up hating one another. It took a toll on all of us; me, him, my family, his family. But I know in my heart it was the best decision at that time. It was scary to walk away from someone I love and from something I’ve always dreamt of wanting. But I did it, with God’s help, I did it.” Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 33
INTERVIEW: MEET TIFFANY, 22
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FACE OF ICHOOSE WIN The twenty-two-year-old 2015 graduate from Messiah College has evolved from knowing the word of God to living the word of God. Quieting the small voice that fed her insecurities and made her feel small in a large world, Tiffany Burrows, opened her mind to believe God‘s words and promises with renewed vigor. In doing this, she uncovered the boldness, braveness and brilliance she possessed when she became comfortable with who she is in Christ. In life, she wins. Get to know Tiff!
“God is the source of my strength. I have to go to him in prayer daily to receive his strength and a reminder of his truths. If not, I can become believing I am the source of
Tiffany Burrows, 22 2015 Graduate, B.A., German Quakertown, PA
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my greatness, which is not true.
Photo Credit: Kito Hammond
discouraged or prideful,
Q:
Describe yourself in three words? A.Three words I would use to describe myself are inspiring, encouraging, and an old soul. I never thought I was inspiring until I started sharing my story of my insecurities with other women and later saw how much it inspired them. It made me realize that people do not want perfect people to be inspired by, rather people want to know that some other imperfect person has overcome or is overcoming a similar obstacle. I would describe myself as encouraging because sharing encouragement is something that I absolutely love to do. I truly believe that God instilled in me a voice of encouragement to share with myself and others. I know this to be true because when I have a down moment, one of the things I like to do is speak encouraging words out loud to myself. I also love sharing encouraging words to others. Every once in a while, just for fun, I write encouraging notes or letters to people I happen to be thinking about. Lastly, I would say that I am an old soul because I am simply old fashioned in the way I dress, think, and carry myself. I think this is so because my grandmother had a
huge influence in my life. She taught me to be an honest woman filled with integrity. What is your vision of a winning life? A.My vision of winning is being at peace with myself. By having this peace I can be free to be myself without any explanations, regrets, or apologies. As the saying goes, “unapologetically me.” What is your favorite scripture or motivational quote? A. Luke 18:27 Then Jesus replied, “What is impossible with man, is possible with God.” How do you deal with fear? A. I have experienced fear many times along my journey and for me to move beyond it is exactly what I have to do. Fearless, for me, is not necessarily the absence of fear. I still get anxious in certain circumstances, but I literally push through fear, not letting it hold me back from doing whatever it is I need to do. One example, I feared confronting people. I would be afraid of how the person would perceive me or how our relationship would change. But one day, I was tired of letting my fear hold me back from saying what was necessary. I vowed to myself that even if I am trembling inside, I am going to do what is necessary, in love, so I can
Q: Q: Q:
Pictured: Melonie Butler, Tiffany Burrows
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Being unapologetically me is being myself without any explanation, regrets, or apologies.
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experience peace and healing. Now, the more I deal with people and issues, the easier it is. I‘m not as fearful anymore. So, pushing past the fear is what allows me to move beyond it. What‘s something you want to share with readers? A. You are not defined by past mistakes or the future one‘s you will make. There is redemption to all who desire to be redeemed. - TB
Q:
TIPS & TIDBITS |
We All Have One: Share Your Story!
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“Your life is your story. Your journey is what makes you YOU!
Share your story! We all have a story and we all are uniquely made in the image of God. Everyone of us was placed on Earth to share a gift with mankind. What I have is different from what you have and vice versa. Don‘t wish that all your problems would go away; pray that you learn how to solve your problems and teach others what you‘ve learned. Your life is your story. Your journey is what makes you YOU! - Shay Hope, Motivational Speaker
SHAY HOPE
Break the Cycle: Fall in Love with Life Again! Sometimes, I feel like we, as women, do not give ourselves the credit or praise we deserve. We fall into the monotony of life and don‘t live up to our full potential. Now, more than ever, I believe it is time women break the cycle of monotony, fall in love with life - and themselves - and bloom into the bold, brave and brilliant women that we are by design! - Jaimee Swift, Graduate Student
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“It is time that women break the cycle of monotony, fall in love with life . . . JAIMEE SWIFT 36 | #ichoosetowin magazine | Summer2015
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“Accepting and loving your differences can be a scary thing. But when it is done, brilliance occurs. ERICA BALDWIN
Your Differences: Own it & Love it In today‘s world, it may be difficult for a woman to be bold and brave because that may mean being different. Accepting and loving your differences can be a scary thing, but when it is done brilliance occurs. Be kind to yourself and others. And, be confident. What you have to offer the world is unique and important. Own it and love it. - Erica Baldwin, Motorsports Writer for Pirelli World Challenge
Choose to unleash your God-given gifts and pursue the path He has for you. Ensure your attitude mirrors your expectations. Then, take action. Start ‘doing’ in favor of winning! If you need help, connect with ichoosetowin.org for support.
Choice. Attitude. Action.
ichoosetowin.org Summer 2015 | #ichoosetowin magazine | 37
“I am victorious not because of me,
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Take the time to learn who you are by God's design. Understand the gifts He placed in you and wholeheartedly pursue the path God has carved specifically for you. Believe in Him as if He is the truth, because you will find, through life’s experiences, He is. Be obedient to Him and find out more about yourself as you unravel the mystery of you. Love yourself enough to invest in the dreams He gave to you. Fall in love with life, God’s people and all of its blessings. In life, WIN!
but because of He who lives in me.
Melonie Butler, Founder, I Choose To Win
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