iCandiLand Jan 2012

Out With The Old & In The New

iCandiLand

Issue #14 Remembering a Life Honoring Dr Martin Luther King Jr.

BUCKS WITH BUX FOR 2012 age g n E y Newl

d

ties i r b e Cel

J. Antoi n Music R ne’s eviews

The Man’s Man List of Cost Efficient, Planned Dates

THE INSIGHTFUL HOUR LINE UP The Power Of Sexual Energy 1/15 Do You Detox or Cleanse Your System 1/15 Are We Supporting Black Farmers 1/22 Why Aren’t Young Blacks Playing Certain Sports 1/ 29 (Interview with Dusty Baker Manager of the Cincinnati Reds)

January

2012

Featured Articles A Long Way Home (A Holiday Story) Melissa Howe The Man’s Man List of Cost Efficient, Planned Dates Panama Jackson Remembering A Life Nordette Adams Candi Articles Dear iCandi Questions by You answered by MsiCandi Music Reviews J. Antoinne What Would You Do iCandi Supporters iCandi Radio Line Ups Bucks with Bux Mega“Bux” Williams iCandi Challenge of the Month In Our Angel’s Hands (Prayer Requests) Recipe of the Month

Rev. William M. King Jr. Jan 1 Tiana Bingum Jan 2 Amanda Ross Jan 3 Kirk Mudd Jan 4 Anthony Wright Jan 5 Sherrie Brown Jan 9 Michael Warren Jan 11 Mike Wood Jan 15 Jayce Miguel Jan 15 Kimberly Hinshaw Jan 16 Kerrence S. Spratley Jan 17 Melvin Williams Jr. Jan 19 Lois Chaney-Smith Jan 26 London J Long Jan 27 Renaldo Judkins Jan 30 Meghan “Bux” Williams Jan 31 Jackie Sloneker Jan 31

D

D

ear iCandi,

Why do women wear revealing clothes when they are shopping?

To try and impress a man!! A lot of men respond to tight and revealing clothing. Now what a lot of women might not notice is that it's not normally the right man that's responding to those clothes. Usually he's thinking "I'd hit that" and not "I want to get to know her." Ladies, remember, first impressions are key! Do you want to be a potential wife or just the next piece of a**!! #ThinkAboutIt

ear iCandi,

Would you relocate to a different state for your spouse?

My initial reaction was to say HECKY YEAH!!, but as a single mother I would truly have to consider a lot of things.

1) Spouse as in LEGAL husband. I’m not talking my “facebook boo” or my “boyfriend” of a couple months. In order to change my daughter’s and my life I need some type of SOLID commitment here.

MsiCandi

2) He needs to be able to financially handle things for awhile. Jobs are a little scarce in today’s economy and I’m not willing to take my child out of a comfortable living environment to one where we are struggling for meals.

D

3) Did I mention we need to be married? Oh I did?? I just had to make sure that was clear. (laughs)

ear iCandi,

Do you think most women have a bipolar nature?? It has been in my experience that many can't comprehend simple logic at times. I am aware they say most women think off emotion most of the time. Do u think this contributes to my theory?

If I wasn’t a mother I’d probably be more willing to explore and go with the flow to see where the relationship would lead, but as a mother my child’s well-being comes first and I always consider how my decisions will affect her. Blessings to you & yours

Masheeakh

MsiCandi

Hey Sweetheart!!

I do agree with the statement that women are emotional creatures. We do, however, understand logic, but to us relationships aren’t logic. Relationships are about emotions and feelings. At times, yes, you do have to make logical decisions in a relationship. Maybe this is why the man is the head of the household because he’s more logical and the woman is more emotional, but can you imagine a relationship that was based on logic alone? No passion, no emotions, no intimate feelings; can you say BORING??!!!! That’s why you guys need us and we need you. To add balance. I don’t think it’s bipolar at all; that’s just the way God made us. I’ve seen bipolar men and bipolar women. That is completely different! Those types need medication or some other type of help! (laughs)

D

MsiCandi

ear iCandi,

Is there a difference between "making love" and "f*cking" or it it all just sex?

MzLottaBody Chi-town Wasssssup LottaBody (I love that name honey! lol) To me, making love is holding me as I cry, caring for me as I'm sick, sending me good morning messages daily, telling me that I'm beautiful often, connecting with my mind, body, and soul. Making love is true intimacy and f*cking is just sex.

MsiCandi

If you have a question for my team or me and would like it to be featured in the iCandiland Newsletter email your questions to icandipro@gmail.com Ask Us Anything!!

iCandi After Dark LINE UP Bullying! From Past to Present 1/6 (How bullying has changed throughout the years) He’s just NOT That Into You 1/15 (Think About It!) He’s Great But His Baby’s Mama is Crazy 1/20 (Ladies call in and share your stories about your man’s “baggage”)

MUSIC REVIEWS Carl Thomas - Conquer Verve Forecast, 2011 Carl Thomas burst onto the scene with the song "I Wish" from his debut album "Emotional", but faded into relative obscurity with the release of said album. Whether that is deserved or not, he's always been consistent with delivering solid albums, save for 2007's So Much Better. Here with his fourth album, Carl is definitely bringing his voice back to the forefront. From the uptempo numbers like "Don't Kiss Me" and "It's Not the Same", to slower numbers like "Conquer" and "Sweet Love", Thomas is definitely back to where he should be; singing. While there are a couple missteps and filler songs included, this album isn't a total waste.

(4 Stars)(B)

Frankie J - Courage Soul Sick, 2011 Frankie J is easily someone that can be pushed into the limelight as an outstanding vocalist, but he suffers from a lack of good material and an audience that craves non-R&B laden hip-hoperas.

Too bad, because this latest album from him is not too bad at all. Where this album may suffer from dated production and too-predictable mainstream mediocrity, it more than makes up in balladry. The ballads give Frankie a chance to really shine, especially on "Say I Do" and "When Love Rings Your Bell". He completely soars on "And I Had You There", where his falsetto and upper registers will have you doing a double-take. Definitely well worth a few listens.

(4 Stars)(B)

Lil' Mo - P.S. I Love Me Bronx Bridge Entertainment, 2011 We all know that Lil' Mo can sing, especially since her own previous albums and collaborations with other artists; however, it seems like she herself has forgotten that she can sing. This is her fourth album and there doesn't seem to be much progression musically except on the songs where she's allowed to actually sing. "Higher" isn't too bad of a midtempo song, neither is "Love Song", and the best song here is "I Love Me", which features the almost-forgotten about Tweet.

The rest of the album is just some put-together songs where you may find yourself wondering if you're actually listening to a Lil' Mo album instead of some random YouTube star.

(3 Stars)(C-)

Eric Roberson - Mister Nice Guy AMZV9, 2011 Eric Roberson is a storyteller, and has always seemed to fly under the radar of mainstream success, which is where he wouldn't mind being. It's a sad state of affairs when artists like Roberson don't get the credit they deserve, because with this album, he's released, as usual, a pretty decent album that you're NOT listening to. He doesn't seem to fall into the mainstream trap of putting out what's hot, just some good ol' feel good music. "Try Love" is lyrically and musically solid, as is "All For Me". "Love's Withdrawal" and its lyricism is worth the album's price alone, and "How Would I Feel" is a perfect introspective song. Just put this album on, press play, and nod your head in agreement.

(4.75 Stars)(A+)

Don't Miss This!

Throwback albums that you don't have (but probably SHOULD) For Real - Free A genuine R&B album from the awesome quartet. "The Saddest Song I Ever Heard" and "Love Will Be Waiting At Home" are classic gems that you don't want to miss.

Dave Hollister - Chicago '85 The Movie Dave's sophomore album followed the format of his debut but took it up two levels. "Take Care of Home" and "One Woman Man" are singles that were a prelude to an awesome album.

Make sure you check out J. Antoinne’s new show "New R&B on iCandi Radio" every Tuesday night at 9pm EST! He’s bringing you REAL R&B Music! You thought R&B was dead...well it’s not and J. Antoinne can prove it!! BE THERE!!

. . . . . . o D u o Y ld

u o W t Wha

if you found out that your life was a reality show, without your knowing....

Sidney Williams lol where is my check cause i know my life is interesting Masheeakh Settles Probably stage a boycott of the show until I received a contract negotiation which included 45% owner ship of all intellectual property of the show Latoya Stiggers I woulda been extra salty.. to find out that your life was pretty much a lie....

Christina Abernanthy I wil bel pissed cause i want to know where is my check Mrs Jackson Get Paid In Full

@William_Boston I think it is tho @kjhinshaw Ask where my $ at! Lol

@Margaret_Ellen Find my check! @VinoCarlion lol it can be! @4EVA305 I want my check lol @locngrowent Your life is a reality show, because someone is ALWAYS watching @GRYNDHOUSZ_PHD id really be humiliated by my nose picking & my time 2 time 60 sec sex fails..:) @iamjerryjean As long as I'm presented w/ sum sort of compensation I consider it flattering. I think anything private that is shown will only B a short-term dilemma since ppl in general have short term memory!

The Man’s Man List of Cost Efficient, Planned Dates

Written by Panama Jackson (writer for http://verysmartbrothas.com) Now you may read that title and think that I mean cheap. But the truth is the key to a woman’s heart isn’t in how much you spend; it’s in how much thought you put into it. See, b*tches love the smiley face.

But what they love more than the smiley face is effort and thoughtfulness. Yes fellas, if you spend even five minutes thinking about what you’d like to do to show her that you care you are winning.

Many of us are afraid of simping out for some woman that we may not even like. Except, you are already interested because you are taking her out. Give it up. Turn it loose. Take off your cool and realize that giving a sh*t about a woman is how we got here. Sure they drive us crazy, but evolution and your namesake can’t show up unless you put in some work. With that being said, here’s a list of cost-efficient but thoughtful dates that women wouldn’t be mad at.

1. Let’s take, a long walk.

In the middle of the day. On her lunch break. Yep. Show up at her job, call her and tell her to meet you outside because you wanted to take a walk with her. Do you know why you stay winning here? The element of surprise. Women love surprises that show you’re thinking about them. And whats more intimate than taking a walk with somebody? You’re stuck for that however long time you’re traversing those sidewalks in the concrete jungle. Plus women looooooooooooove them some good company. Keep her laughing and smiling and a little innocent random shoulder brushes and she’ll f*ck around and fall in love before you hit 0.2 miles

2. Picnics And the crowd said, “duh”. Look, picnics are the great leverage equalizer. Sure you’re trying to get some stank out of her.

But you ended up actually liking her. And do you know how I know you ended up liking her? Ain’t no ninja about to expend the energy it takes to put together a picnic on a woman he ain’t feeling. Word.Life. A picnic is not an easy thing to pull off.

You have to make everything. Find a locale. Buy a checkered blanket (it ain’t a wifebeater unless its white and it ain’t a picnic unless the blanket is checkered), and you need a basket. You’re going to have to take your happy arse to a Michael’s or something to get a basket. Not a container ninja. Oh, and the point about trying to get you some stank? Well, after you do a picnic (which can be cheap though it takes effort), she’ll be trying to figure out when to give it to you. All you do is win, win, win no matter what. Oh, and if you combo number 1 and number 2, SHE might propose to you. That’s thoughtful.

3. Go watch the sunset…befo.

There are very few things more romantic than just sitting out and staring at stars or a sunset together. It’s like looking at motherf*cking ducklings, pimpin. You ever take a chick to look at ducklings and not fall in love? You have to be a cold duck (no pun intended) to look at a duckling and not fall in love. Sunset? Ducks? Same sh*t.

4. Museum I live in DC so this might be cheating but all of our good museums are free. Same with our zoo. Going to the museum intimates culture. And chicks like culture. Even hood rats think going to a museum means something. You get kudos for going to one of the off kilter ones too. Don’t just hit up American History. Hit up Natural History and check out the dinosaur bones. And fossils. Or go to an aquarium. Aquariums rock. Word to Pookie. Our Aquarium in DC is like 8 bucks. And it is an 8 dollar ass aquarium. But it’s underground and its a cool excursion. Because who thinks to go to the Aquarium. That sounds like you thought about it. Thinking? That’s effort, ninja. Or a botanical garden. Go learn something.

5. Most importantly, things you heard her say she likes

This one is hard because it requires listening. I know, listening is for suckas. But the truth is, if you listen to a woman talk long enough she’ll give you all kinds of interests of hers and you can take one word like “travel” or “food” and find some cool travel exhibit. For free my ninja! Or take her on a “cook your own ethnic food” date. Actually, that last one might run you. Don’t do it. Buy her an ethnic cookbook and say, let’s cook together. Cooking together? Quality time. And women love quality time. Do you know why? It means you’re thinking about her. Which makes it thoughtful.

Those are a few ideas. My people, what else do you have? Ladies, help us out. Let us know your most thoughtful date or what would constitute a perfect date to you? And fellas, what else you got. Contribute to the database!!!!

$$$ BUCKS with BUX $$$ Meghan “Bux” Williams is currently the Marketing Coordination for iCandi Productions & Producer for iCandi AfterDark. She graduated from the College of Mount St. Joseph in 2006 with a degree in business marketing. She has been with iCandi since the very beginning.

Going into the year 2012 we all can look back and think about all the money that we have spent. Some maybe more than others, but we can always put that behind us and move forward. You don’t have to go to the extreme like the Geico commercials; for 2012 just remember to plan ahead and budget for the unexpected. Sometimes we have to remember to set limits when it comes to spending money. If you have a list, no matter what it is in reference to, stick to it. Plan out a budget; that way you can see where all your money is going. A good website is www.mint.com, where all you have to do is plug in numbers and it does the rest for you. It even gives you additional money saving tips. Start the new year off right saving money.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

*** iCandi Challenge *** Calling all MOTHERS!!! iCandi challenges all mothers to officially declare a day this month (whichever day works best for you) as "Mommy & Me Day." You need to plan an activity to do with your child(ren) that day. You have to turn off your phone, get rid of your husband/boyfriends, friends, etc and focus on your child for four hours nonstop. Take pictures of the day and email them to me at iCandiPro@gmail.com by Jan 30 so I can highlight my favorite iCandi Mommies! You down for the cause? SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!!

Happy Birthday Dr King Jr. Jan 15, 1929 Remembering A Life

By Nordette Adams

I remember him in the misted vision of toddler years and again in girlhood, the booming voice on TV, someone grown-ups talked about, eyelids flapped wide.

Elders huddled 'round the screen enraptured, in fear for him, in awe.

I remember him.

His words swept the land, singing our passion.

Dogs growled in streets. Men in sheets.

Police battering my people. (Water, a weapon.)

Yet my people would rejoice... And mourn.

I remember him, a fearsome warrior crying peace, a man--blemished by clay, the stain of sin as any other, calling on the Rock-Death's sickle on his coat tails, yet he spied glory.

Shall we walk again and remember him, not as the Madison Aveners do, but in solitude and hope with acts of courage and compassion, with lives of greater scope carving fresh paths of righteousness?

I remember.

The Long Way Home....

(continued)

A Holiday Story Written by Melissa Howe

"Hello, Clarence." Mary smiled nervously at the skinny boy in front of her. He kept his eyes on his feet, hands shoved into the pockets of jeans obviously too small for him.

"Hello, ma'am." Clarence answered quietly.

"Mrs. Williams has come to take you home with her." Krystal put her arm around Clarence's shoulders. He finally looked up and Mary was surprised at how familiar he seemed to her. She felt love swell in her heart for him and couldn't help pulling him to her for a hug.

"Come on, Clarence. Let's go home." She smiled at him encouragingly and led him out to her car.

When they arrived home, Michael and James were waiting for them in the front room.

"Welcome home! Come on, I'll show you your room." James' outgoing personality left no room for Clarence's shyness. He clapped Clarence on the back and led him from the room. Michael put his arm around Mary's waist as they followed.

"This was a great idea." He whispered in her ear.

"And don't worry about school. I'll introduce you around. You'll make friends in no time." James was talking a mile a minute when they walked in. Clarence silently nodded. Mary was struck by their similarities. They looked like brothers. Mary smiled at the thought that God had led this boy to them.

Mary continued to thank God for bringing Clarence into their lives over the next few months. Slowly he opened up to them, talking and laughing easily. He and James got along well. Michael often called him son when speaking to and about him. Clarence was a member of the family.

As Christmas approached Mary knew that she and Michael needed to make it permanent. When she brought the subject up with him he laughed and swung her around.

"Let's tell the boys." He pulled her along to James' room where the boys were playing a video game.

"Boys, we've got something we'd like to talk to you about." Mary smiled as both boys groaned before turning off the game.

"Okay, Mom, shoot." James leaned back, crossing his arms behind his head.

"Clarence, darling, we think of you as a son. We love you." Mary couldn't stop herself from hugging Clarence to her.

"We want ot make it permanent by adopting you. What do you think?" Michael finished for her. Clarence pulled back from Mary to stare at them.

"Do you really mean it?" Fear filled his eyes, as though at any moment they would laugh and tell him it was all a joke.

"Yes, we really mean it." Mary smiled at him. Slowly he smiled back and then threw himself into Mary's arms. James followed him and Michael wrapped his arms around them all.

"Come on, boys. Let's get a head start on those Christmas cookies." Mary laughed and pulled herself free of the family hug.

"No offense, Mom, but would you mind if we skipped out? Some kids from school are meeting out at Jerry's house. He's got a new snowmobile." James fixed his mother with his most charming smile.

"Home before dinner." Mary answered.

"Come on, brother." James grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.

"I think I'll stay home." Clarence smiled at Mary. James waved as he disappeared through the door.

Several hours later the kitchen was a mess and a stack of containers filled with decorated cookies stood on the counter.

"We'd better get this place cleaned up if we want to make dinner." Mary laughed at the look on Clarence's face.

"Let's just order pizza." He said. Mary laughed again and began clearing counters. When a knock sounded on the door she left Clarence stacking dishes in the dishwasher and went to answer it.

Shock slammed into her when she saw a uniformed officer standing there.

"Are you Mrs. Williams?" He asked her. Mary started blankly at him. Michael came up behind her.

"I'm Mr. Williams. How can I help you?" Michael kept his face blank but his heart was racing.

"Your son, James, has been in an accident. They've taken him to Builtmoore Hospital. I've been informed that he's in stable condition." The officer hated giving these house calls. He helped Michael catch Mary as her knees gave way. They sat her down on the couch.

"What happened, Officer?" Michael fought to keep his voice calm. Mary needed his strength.

"A group of kids were playing with a snowmobile. While James was taking his turn something went wrong and he flipped. He has several severe lacerations but he is currently in stable condition." The office said. Michael nodded.

"We'll head to the hospital immediately." Michael said. The officer nodded and let himself out.

Within minutes all three were in the car speeding toward the hospital. Once there everything moved in fast forward. The doctor came out to inform them that James would need a blood transfusion to help replace what he had lost. Due to a shortage they didn't have his type on hand. All three were tested to see who would be the best match before they were allowed to see James for a few minutes.

"Your youngest son is the best match. Their blood type is the same." The doctor smiled as Mary sagged in relief against Michael.

"God led him to us, Mary. God led Clarence to us." Michael said. The doctor gave them a quizzical look.

"Clarence isn't our biological son. We're adopting him." Mary explained. The doctor kept his confused look as he glanced at the papers he held.

"Well, this of course isn't the accurate testing for this sort of thing but according to what I'm seeing those boys are blood relations of some sort." The doctor explained. Mary and Michael stared at each other, both seeing the other struggle against the hope they knew was so easily shattered.

"Our son was kidnapped fourteen years ago." Michael whispered.

"We already have samples of your blood. We'll run the tests immediately." The doctor whisked away. A nurse came to take Clarence for his donation. Mary and Michael followed, saying nothing but too afraid to let him out of their sights.

Two hours later they all sat in the James' room. He slept peacefully while Clarence watched the small TV. Mary and Michael held hands and watched both boys.

"Mr. and Mrs. Williams?" The doctor stepped into the room.

"Yes, Doctor?" Mary and Michael stood. Clarence turned off the TV. "James is doing excellent. We want to keep him overnight but you can take him home in the morning." The doctor smiled. Mary couldn't help the smile of relief even though she waited with bated breath for the rest of the doctor's news.

"As a matter of fact you can take both of your sons home in the morning." The doctor winked and handed her a paper that declared her the biological mother of Clarence. She turned to him, thanking God as she drank in the sight of him.

"Aaron."

HE PUT A RING ON IT!!!

Congrats to Jessica, Chrissy, & Aretha!! The soon to be married ladies

In Our Angel Hands Thomas Chapman (The Legend) Carlos Jeff & Family Berdie Lewsis “Sista Mama” The Barnes Family Karen Daniels Toria & Family Kevin “Kdaddy” Hicks Joanne Williams Nevaeh Mccoy Phyllis Evans & Family Jose Aldanondo Robin Smith Ann Smith Lillian Smith Cheryl O’Coner Alicia Hearing & Family Matt & Michael Thompson Amber “Big Sexy” Johnson Tila Frost & Family Holly Carrigg & Family Jane Boyles Jennie Mathis Bonita King-Long Zahbria Thomson Junita Bonner All of the iCandi Supporters & Their Families

iCandi Angels R.I.P.

If you yourself are in need or you know someone in need of Prayer email us a icandipro@gmail.com We will add the name to next month’s e-newsletter.

Blessings to you all! ~MsiCandi~

William & “Candy” King Kandace Pyles Brycee & Cameron Jeff JP James Romano Anna Brown Jerome Swanson James “Jellybean” House Patricia Kirkland Scott Burrows Sr. John Bruce Gilmore Jr. Julia Ann Hicks LeRoy Morgan Nadene McGowan Reshaud Jackson James Revels Jr. Betty Bailey Sally Rowland Jannie Tubbs Theodore Perry

Challenge 3

EMILY BOYLES

RECIPE OF THE MONTH With Superbowl around the corner, I love hosting parties and eating snack food. My favorite thing to serve at parties is DIP!! You can’t go wrong with dip. My Top 3 would have to be Rotel, cheese ball, and spinach Dip! These three are not only easy to prepare but your guests won’t be able to stop eating! :-)

Ingredients: Ingredients: 2 lb. lean ground beef 1 lb. Jimmy Dean sausage 2 lb. Velveeta cheese 1 can Rotel tomatoes with chilies Directions: Brown hamburger meat & sausage; drain well. Cut up Velveeta cheese and add Rotel tomatoes with chilies. Place all the above into your favorite crock pot and cook until all the cheese is melted. Serve with chips and/or raw vegetables. *I usually double this recipe*

2 pkgs. 8 oz. each Cream Cheese 2 pkgs. Thin Sliced Pastrami, chopped small (You can usually get it in the lunch meat department for around .60 each) 3-4 chopped Green Onions

Ingredients: 1 10 oz package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry 1 1/2 cup of sour cream Seasoning: Either 4 teaspoons of a salad seasoning such as Buttermilk Ranch

Directions: Mix all ingredients and roll into a ball,

OR

using Wax Paper to make it easier. You

1/2 teaspoon garlic powder

may also roll the Cheese Ball in chopped

1/2 teaspoon salt

pecans or walnuts. Chill until ready to

1/4 teaspoon black pepper

serve. Serve with crackers of your choice.

1/2 teaspoon some kind of powdered herb, such

2 teaspoons onion powder

as Greek seasoning Directions: If you're using a food processor, pulse the spinach alone a few times. Then add the rest of the ingredients and blend well. If not using a food processor, stir to combine the ingredients in a bowl.

A Word From MsiCandi:

Happy New Year Candi Canes!! You guys have blessed me with another year of your greatly appreciated support and I have set goals this year NOT to disappoint you! We have added some new KEP editors to the newsletter team, we have some big events coming your way, such as an iCandi calendar, new radio shows, and new contests! So once again THANK YOU ALL from the bottom of my heart and get ready for Candi 2012! Out with the OLD & in with the NEW! Keep being iCandilicious!

MsiCandi