BCIC Discretion Sample

Discretion The ability to avoid words, actions, and attitudes that could result in undesirable consequences

“A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.”

PROVERBS 22:3

ELIHU CAREFULLY ADDRESSES HIS ELDERS “Elihu also proceeded, and said, Suffer me a little, and I will shew thee that I have yet to speak on God’s behalf. I will fetch my knowledge from afar, and will ascribe righteousness to my Maker.”

JOB 36:1–3

SPIRITUAL GIFT:

BIBLICAL CHARACTER ILLUSTRATED CURRICULUM Illustrated in Scripture, Illustrated in Life

Exhorter

CONTENTS

Biblical Character Illustrated Curriculum Illustrated in Scripture “The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple” (Psalm 19:7b). Biblical

2

Introduction

character is illustrated in this curriculum

2 How to Use This Curriculum 3 Goals and Objectives 4 Character Quality Overview 5 Discretion in Scripture

6 Lesson 1:

Choose My Words Carefully

the lives of people in God’s Word. We most often benefit from the positive examples of faithful men and women. “For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through

7 Bible Story: Elihu Carefully Addresses His Elders

patience and comfort of the scriptures

8 Memory Verse: Proverbs 25:11

might have hope” (Romans 15:4). There were

9 Activity: The Beauty of Kind Words

also people in the Bible who are repre-

10 Lesson 2:

Choose the Wise Path

sentations of poor character, and we can learn from their lives as well. “Now these

11 Bible Story: A Young King Makes a Choice

things were our examples, to the intent we

12 Memory Verse: Proverbs 22:3

should not lust after evil things, as they

13 Activity: Make Your Choice!

also lusted” (I Corinthians 10:6). We would

14 Lesson 3:

Control My Emotions

be wise to learn from the testimonies God has given us in Scripture.

15 Bible Story: Moses’ Rash Sin Brings Severe Consequences

Illustrated in Life

16 Memory Verse: James 1:19–20

“Faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by

17 Activity: Input-Output

the word of God” (Romans 10:17). Hearing

18 Lesson 4: Turn Down Any Invitation to Do Wrong 19 Bible Story: Joseph’s Narrow Escape 20 Memory Verse: Genesis 39:9b 21 Activity: Word Search

22

through both artwork and lessons from

Additional Resources

the Word of God causes us to grow in faith.

This curriculum offers many practical applications of God’s Word to everyday life. “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only” (James 1:22). As God enables us to act in faith, our lives as believers will illustrate His character to others.

22 Discretion GEMs 23 Journal and GEM

Mine

24 Hymn Sheet Music: “Lord, Speak to Me” 25 Hymn History: “Lord, Speak to Me”

by Frances Havergal 26 Explaining Salvation to a Child 27 Reproducible Coloring Pages 31 Recommended Resources

The character of God is illustrated in Scripture.

May it also be illustrated in our lives.

Character Quality Overview What Is Discretion?

Read aloud and discuss what discretion means and how it applies to life.

T

he operational definition of discretion is “the ability to avoid words, actions, and attitudes which could result in undesirable consequences.” A person practices discretion by thoughtfully considering the possible consequences before taking any action. He values silence, both to allow himself to think before he speaks, and then after he has spoken, to allow the hearer to consider his message. He is cautious and thoughtful, because he knows careless actions often hurt people and damage relationships.

He wants to help others, and he realizes others may be influenced by his choice of When pursued, the fox conactivities, music, and enterstantly evaluates his direction and makes strategic changes tainment. A discreet person to avoid the undesirable condoes not laugh at or make sequence of capture! jokes at the expense of others.

Using discretion, he dresses modestly in consideration of others, not wanting his attire to be a stumbling block for them. He knows that, as a Christian, his choices can bring honor or disgrace to Christ’s name. Acting with discretion preserves and protects him and prevents unwanted problems. (See Proverbs 2:10–12, 16, 20.)

The opposite of discretion is simplemindedness. A simpleminded person is not attentive to what is going on around him. Sometimes he is oblivious to who is speaking, what is being said, or what is happening! Ignoring his surroundings can bring trouble. (See Proverbs 22:3.)

Lacking caution and care can lead to rash, foolhardy,

4

and reckless behavior. However, Proverbs is filled with insights on how to grow in wisdom, prudence, and discretion. God’s Word promises to give “subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion” (Proverbs 1:4). As you apply the wisdom found in Proverbs and learn from experience, God will enable you to rightly discern what words, actions, and attitudes should be avoided.

How do we know which choices are best? In addition to finding wisdom in God’s Word, we also learn wise choices as the Holy Spirit guides us in each situation.

Considering possible results is helpful in discerning appropriate behavior. These questions can help you think ahead as to the best course of action: If I do this or say that, what might happen? What would I need to do next?

An attractive outward appearance will never compensate for a lack of discretion. “As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion” (Proverbs 11:22).

How could these words be misunderstood?

How might others be affected by my attitude?

Would this be an appropriate time to speak, or would it be better for me to remain silent?

A person with discretion is sensitive to the Lord’s leading, even when it means doing nothing! He asks the Lord for wisdom to know how to respond with the right words, proper actions, and Godly attitudes.

Discretion in Scripture s you read and study God’s Word,

DISCRETION KEY VERSE

you will see Who He is! Be willing to

“A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself:

be changed by Him so Christ can be seen

but the simple pass on, and are punished.” PROVERBS 22:3

A

through your life and others will glorify God.

The Character of God

Discretion in My Life

We see examples of discretion in God’s character in the following ways:

Now let’s examine some ways God wants us to live out discretion daily.

•

God carefully chose His words with Adam and Eve, leading them to admit their sin.

(See Genesis 3:9–13.)

•

God has provided a way for us to avoid undesirable consequences.

(See John 3:15–16, Psalm 19:7–11.)

•

Jesus discerned the Pharisees’ deception and prudently answered their questions with a question.

(See Mark 12:13–17.)

•

Jesus recognized that silence was the only appropriate response when He stood before Herod for questioning.

•

(See Psalm 141:3.)

•

Jesus used discretion to calmly defuse a tense situation.

•

The Holy Spirit helps believers to understand the deep things of God so that they can speak with God’s wisdom, not man’s.

•

The Holy Spirit inspired the prophets to speak the right words.

(See II Peter 1:21.)

What path is chosen by most people?

Which path do I want to choose?

(See Matthew 7:13–14.)

•

Is a lack of discretion a “mouth” problem or a “heart” problem?

(See Matthew 12:34.)

•

If I am motivated by love, will I behave unseemly or demonstrate discretion?

(See I Corinthians 13:5.)

•

What words, actions, and attitudes lead to undesirable consequences?

(See Ephesians 5:1–6.)

(See I Corinthians 2:10, 13–14.)

•

Is it prudent to believe everything I hear? What should I do instead?

(See Proverbs 14:15.)

(See John 8:3–11.)

•

How important is it to watch what I say?

(See Proverbs 13:3.)

(See Luke 23:8–9.)

•

Do I ask God to guard my words?

•

What does God’s grace teach me about how to act?

(See Titus 2:11–12.)

5

GOD ENABLES ME TO

Choose My Words Carefully

W

INTRODUCTION

hat if someone accompanied you one day

and wrote down every word you said—and then posted your words publicly for all to see? You might become more careful in choosing your words! Jesus warns us: “But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment” (Matthew 12:36). Idle words are useless and unproductive.

Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all! When something does need to be said, a person with discretion finds a gracious way and a fitting time to say it. Every word of God is pure and accomplishes a right­eous, intended purpose. (See Isaiah 55:11.)

As we allow God to conform us to His likeness, we will develop discretion, choosing words that are purposeful and edifying to others.

Elihu Carefully Addresses His Elders

DISCRETION The ability to avoid words, actions, and attitudes which could result in undesirable consequences 6

BIBLE STORY

LESSON 1

Elihu Carefully Addresses His Elders

A

fter several sudden catastrophes, a man named Job discovered that in a short time he had

Choose My Words Carefully

friends concluded that his troubles were obviously God’s chastisement for some sin he had committed.

suffered severe loss of his livestock and herds, his

Job, however, adamantly insisted that he had been

servants, his health, and even his ten children! Why

blameless before the Lord God. Meanwhile, a fourth

would such terrible losses happen to a God-fearing

man named Elihu had been listening intently as the

man who was upright and shunned evil? When

men contended with each other. Elihu disagreed with

three of Job’s friends heard the devastating news,

his friends’ conclusions. Should he speak up? Would

they traveled from their various homes to come and

waiting to speak be difficult for him? Would an appro-

comfort him. They found Job so overwhelmed in

priate time come for him to speak? If so, would he

his grief over his tragic losses that the men sat and

choose his words carefully so that he could discreetly

joined him in utter silence for seven entire days.

and most effectively communicate his message?

Afterward, the well-meaning friends took turns

Let’s read the Bible story in Job 32:1–33:4 and then discuss the following questions.

speaking, and a long debate commenced. Job’s three

1. What did Elihu observe about Job from listening to him speak? (See Job 32:1–2.)

When have you discerned someone’s attitude by being quiet, listening, and observing?

2. Why did Elihu wait to speak? (See Job 32:4.)

What have you learned by listening to those who are older than you? How have you applied what you observed?

3. What group of people did Elihu say usually has more wisdom? (See Job 32:6–7.)

What words, actions, and attitudes could you choose to show that you value your parents’ experience and wisdom?

4. From where did Elihu say understanding comes?

(See Job 32:8.)

When is it difficult to wait for your turn to speak?

What benefits would come from waiting to speak at the right time instead of interrupting?

6. What words did Elihu avoid? What consequences did he foresee if he had spoken such words?

(See Job 32:21–22.)

Do you purposefully avoid using offensive words?

What words do you choose to say instead?

7. What motivated Elihu’s words to his older friend Job? (See Job 33:2–3.)

Luke 6:45 refers to bringing good out of the “good treasure of his heart.” How can you store this good treasure in your heart to draw from when you act and speak? (See Luke 6:45.)

When was a time you prayed and asked God to give you the right words to speak?

8. Through His trials, what did Job learn and wisely articulate about God? (See Job 42:1–6.) What did God do next? (See Job 42:10–13.)

5. Was Elihu eagerly wanting to share his opinion, or was he content to remain silent?

(See Job 32:18–19.)

Even when under pressure, are you respectful in your speech toward God? What praise can you voice to God today?

7

Operational Definitions of Character Qualities ALERTNESS vs. Unawareness

ATTENTIVENESS vs. Unconcern

AVAILABILITY vs. Self-Centeredness

BOLDNESS vs. Fearfulness

CAUTIOUSNESS vs. Rashness

COMPASSION vs. Indifference

CONTENTMENT vs. Covetousness

Being aware of that which is taking place around me so that I can have the right response to it

Showing the worth of a person by giving undivided concentration to his words and emotions

Making my own schedule and priorities secondary to the wishes of those I am serving

Confidence that what I have to say or do is true and right and just in the sight of God

Knowing how important right timing is in accomplishing right actions

Investing whatever is necessary to heal the hurts of others

Realizing that God has provided everything I need for my present happiness

Mark 14:38

Hebrews 2:1

Acts 4:29

Proverbs 19:2

S

M

Philippians 2:20–21

S

P

G

I John 3:17

M

I Timothy 6:8

G

CREATIVITY vs. Underachievement

DECISIVENESS vs. Double-mindedness

DEFERENCE vs. Rudeness

DEPENDABILITY vs. Inconsistency

DETERMINATION vs. Faintheartedness

DILIGENCE vs. Slothfulness

DISCERNMENT vs. Judgment

Approaching a need, a task, or an idea from a new perspective

The ability to finalize difficult decisions based on the will and ways of God

Limiting my freedom in order not to offend the tastes of those God has called me to serve

Fulfilling what I consented to do even if it means unexpected sacrifice

Purposing to accomplish God’s goals in God’s time regardless of the opposition

The God-given ability to understand why things happen

James 1:5

Romans 14:21

Visualizing each task as a special assignment from the Lord and using all my energies to accomplish it

Romans 12:2

E

O

M

Psalm 15:4

T

O

II Timothy 4:7–8

Colossians 3:23

T

I Samuel 16:7

E

DISCRETION vs. Simplemindedness

ENDURANCE vs. Giving Up

ENTHUSIASM vs. Apathy

FAITH vs. Unbelief

FLEXIBILITY vs. Resistance

FORGIVENESS vs. Rejection

GENEROSITY vs. Stinginess

The ability to avoid words, actions, and attitudes that could result in undesirable consequences

The inward strength to withstand stress to accomplish God’s best

Fervently expressing with my soul the joy of my spirit

Visualizing what God intends to do in a given situation and acting in harmony with it

Not setting my affections on ideas or plans that could be changed by God or others

Clearing the record of those who have wronged me and allowing God to love them through me

Realizing that all I have belongs to God and using it for His purposes

Hebrews 11:1

Colossians 3:2

Ephesians 4:32

E

Proverbs 22:3

Galatians 6:9

S

I Thessalonians 5:16, 19

E

E

S

P

II Corinthians 9:6

S

GENTLENESS vs. Harshness

GRATEFULNESS vs. Unthankfulness

HOSPITALITY vs. Loneliness

HUMILITY vs. Pride

INITIATIVE vs. Unresponsiveness

JOYFULNESS vs. Self-Pity

JUSTICE vs. Corruption

Showing personal care and concern in meeting the needs of others

Making known to God and others in what ways they have benefited my life

Cheerfully sharing food, shelter, and spiritual refreshment with those God brings into my life

Recognizing and doing what needs to be done before I am asked to do it

Delighting in fellowship with the Lord regardless of my circumstances

Personal responsibility to uphold God’s unchanging laws

I Corinthians 4:7

Hebrews 13:2

Recognizing that without the help of God and others my achievements in life would not have been possible

Romans 12:21

Psalm 16:11

Micah 6:8

O

O

I Thessalonians 2:7

M

G

S

James 4:6

S

M

LOVE vs. Selfishness

LOYALTY vs. Unfaithfulness

MEEKNESS vs. Anger

OBEDIENCE vs. Willfulness

ORDERLINESS vs. Disorganization

PATIENCE vs. Restlessness

PERSUASIVENESS vs. Contentiousness

Giving to others’ basic needs without having as my motive personal reward

Using difficult times to demonstrate my commitment to God and to those He has called me to serve

Yielding my personal rights and expectations to God

Eagerly yielding to God’s Word rather than following my own will

Preparing myself and my surroundings so I will achieve the greatest efficiency

Guiding vital truths around another’s mental roadblocks

Psalm 62:5

II Corinthians 10:5

I Corinthians 14:40

Accepting a difficult situation from God without giving Him a deadline to remove it

I Corinthians 13:3

E

O

John 15:13

M

P

O

Romans 5:3–4

T

II Timothy 2:24

P

PUNCTUALITY vs. Tardiness

RESOURCEFULNESS vs. Wastefulness

RESPONSIBILITY vs. Unreliability

REVERENCE vs. Disrespect

SECURITY vs. Anxiety

SELF-CONTROL vs. Self-Indulgence

SENSITIVITY vs. Callousness

Showing high esteem for other people and their time

Wise use of that which others would normally overlook or discard

Knowing and doing what both God and others are expecting from me

Luke 16:10

Romans 14:12

Structuring my life around that which is eternal and cannot be destroyed or taken away

Instant obedience to the initial promptings of God’s Spirit

Ecclesiastes 3:1

Awareness of how God is working through the people and events in my life to produce the character of Christ in me

Exercising my senses so I can perceive the true spirit and emotions of those around me

Proverbs 23:17–18

John 6:27

G

G

O

T

T

Galatians 5:24–25

T

M

Romans 12:15

SINCERITY vs. Hypocrisy

THOROUGHNESS vs. Incompleteness

THRIFTINESS vs. Extravagance

TOLERANCE vs. Prejudice

TRUTHFULNESS vs. Deception

VIRTUE vs. Impurity

WISDOM vs. Natural Inclinations

Eagerness to do what is right, with transparent motives

Knowing what factors will diminish the effectiveness of my work or words if neglected

Not letting myself or others spend that which is not necessary

Acceptance of others as unique expressions of specific character qualities in varying degrees of maturity

Earning future trust by accurately reporting past facts

The moral excellence and purity of spirit that radiate from my life as I obey God’s Word

Seeing and responding to life’s situations from God’s frame of reference

G Philippians 2:2

P

I Peter 1:22

P

T P— Prophet

Proverbs 18:15

S— Server

Luke 16:11

G T—Teacher

E— Exhorter

Ephesians 4:25

P G— Giver

II Peter 1:3–5

O— Organizer

E

Proverbs 9:10

M— Mercy

Revealing the character of Christ through the stories in His Word.

SAVE 20% on any individual Biblical Character Illustrated booklets

Use coupon: BCICBOOKLET

Biblical Character Illustrated Curriculum Discover this unique tool that uses the stories in Scripture to illuminate character qualities God wants to develop in the lives of His people. This curriculum contains multiple ways to teach character to kids and give them a vision for building character through faith in Christ!

Single Booklets: $10 each Complete Set: $379 (SAVE 23%)

Single PDF Download: $3 each PDF Download Set: $109 (SAVE 25%)

OTHER BIBLICAL CHARACTER RESOURCES

Biblical Character Illustrated 49-Booklet Set

Power for True Success

Hymns for the Family, Volumes 1–4

Character Sketches, 4-Volume Set

Includes 2 bonus items: Calendar + Understanding Spiritual Gifts

Insightful, Biblical studies on all 49 character qualities

Companion hymns for each character quality

Timeless resources to show God’s character relfected in creation

Shop these resources at store.iblp.org. • Questions? Call 903-636-9600 or email biblicalcharacter@iblp.org.