HYPERTRASH Summer 2020 - FULL ISSUE #2

HYPERTRASH

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 REJECTED ALTERNATE COVER "ART" BY JAMES SINGER

HYPERTRASH QUARTERLY CARS X CHAOS SUMMER 2020 / VOLUME 1 / ISSUE 2 PUBLISHER / CREATIVE DIRECTOR NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO EDITORS JAMES SINGER RHYS HAYDON NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO CONTRIBUTING WRITERS NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO JAMES SINGER JESSICA SIERACKI RHYS HAYDON KYLE BARNES MICHAEL MASSAS TRENT WHICKER CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO JAMES SINGER KYLE BARNES JESSICA SIERACKI ANTHONY HOPE MICHAEL MASSAS TRENT WHICKER ANDREW CARPENTER ILLUSTRATIONS JAMES SINGER JORGE SIXTO-SANCHEZ MEDIA SPECIALIST JOSEPH DOLL ADVERTISING DIRECTOR GTFO CONTACT OR SUBMISSION HYPERTRASHMAG.COM @HYPERTRASHMAG COVER PHOTO: Nathanael Napolitano Photo of the 2012 Formula One Monaco Grand Prix as seen on the giant digital screens from the grand stands BACK COVER: Jorge Sixto-Sanchez 'Racing Pedigree' 2019

$17 D.I.Y. / SELF FUNDED

PHOTO: MASSAS

© 2020 HYPERTRASH MAGAZINE ALL RIGHTS RESERVED



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CONTENTS

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CARLO DURANTE In Memoriam NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO

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SWIPE LEFT. SWIPE LEFT. PORSCHE! A love story JESSICA SIERACKI

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THE MONACO GP WILL NOT BE TELEVISED Because it was fucking canceled NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO

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PAUL BLAKE Interview with Lotus test driver and Porsche Club of America instructor RHYS HAYDON

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GROWING UP FAST Interview with kart racer Jonathan Miles NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO

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AMERICAN RESURGENCE A little Q&A with Ford enthusiast Jean-Louis of Windsor and Kent KYLE BARNES



HYPERTRASH QUARTERLY

CARS X CHAOS

ANTHONY HOPE EVERYWHERE Interview with the founder of ERNST Everything

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NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO

CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE Los Angeles is on fire. A local photographer shares his experiences documenting it.

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MICHAEL MASSAS

FILM REVIEW NO MAN'S LAND, 1987 Rated R (yes—we are doing a film review)

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JAMES SINGER

OPINIONS AND EDUCATION The age gap

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TRENT WHICKER

COUNTERPOINT Rhys on racing

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RHYS HAYDON

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W HAT S ORT OF P E R S ON R E A D S H Y P E RT R A SH ?

Winners and losers. Or someone somewhere in between. Or maybe even you. Basically what we are trying to say is that a person of any race, background, sex, gender, age, or income level might be a HYPERTRASH reader. You just never know. It's a little bit like Fight Club, just not as famous or cool (yet). We can say with a high degree of confidence—the HYPERTRASH reader stands up to injustice, fights for equality, resists authority and works toward unity. They also probably know their way around engines, or knows someone who does, or can at least bribe someone who does. They probably have raced, or would like to race, or have told someone they are good at racing, or they race other people—who themselves may not know it's a race. If you think you know someone who fits this description, please send them our way, we'd love to hear their stories.

Advertising: Don’t advertise with us. We are not doing this for the money and we charge ungodly ad rates to put the trash you are selling into the trash we are printing. Contact information located on masthead. Send hate mail, it's motivating. hypertrashmag.com 6

AS KIDS WE IMAGINED THE YEAR 2020 WOULD BRING FLYING CARS ROBOTS AT HOME AND MAYBE A FEW SETTLEMENTS ON THE MOON INSTEAD WE HAVE RACIAL INEQUALITY POLICE BRUTALITY A GLOBAL PANDEMIC MASSIVE UNEMPLOYMENT MURDER HORNETS RIOTS (and we are only halfway through the year) POLITICS ARE NOT THE FOCUS OF THIS PUBLICATION BUT WE CANNOT SIT IDLE AND SILENT EACH OF US IS AFFECTED BY THE INTOLERANCE OF OTHERS WE STAND WITH THE OPPRESSED WE STAND WITH THE MARGINALIZED WE STAND WITH PEOPLE OF COLOR WE STAND FOR UNITY FIGHT FOR EQUALITY PROTECT EACH OTHER _________

HYPERTRASH QUARTERLY CARS X CHAOS

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 PHOTO: MASSAS

CARLO DURANTE 1943 - 2020

IN MEMORIAM 8



CARLO DURANTE of ALFA TACOMA It is never pleasant to start off with a sad subject.

But I wanted to put this here first because it is important.

CARLO DURANTE passed away on April 10, 2020.

Owner, operator, and lead mechanic at Alfa Tacoma. A onetime franchised Alfa Romeo import dealership, which then turned into an Italian marque repair and restoration shop.

Carlo and his brother Lino's depth of knowledge and their service record enjoy legendary status among Northwest Italian car fans. The Durantes' have been a local treasure keeping these classic cars on the road for more than forty years.

Carlo first started doing car repairs at the age of ten in his home town of Mirabella, Italy. In 1956 at the age of 12, he got a job working with the Alfa Romeo Company in Maranello as an apprentice mechanic.

In 1961 Carlo came to the U.S. with his father via Napoli to New York, then by train across the continent to Seattle where he already had family established in Des Moines, WA. His aunt and uncle owned a farm and would sell produce at the Pike Place Market. During this time Carlo worked as a car mechanic around the Seattle area.

In 1975 Carlo opened Alfa of Tacoma which functioned as an Alfa Romeo dealership until Alfa stopped importing cars in 1995. It was then that Carlo and Lino focused on repairs and restoration. Even hosting tech sessions for each marque and its enthusiasts, with more than fifty participants per event.

The first time I spoke with Carlo was in June of 2019. I had approached him over the telephone about doing a PPI on a project car I was going to buy. He told me he wasn't taking on any new business as he and his brother Lino were on the verge of retirement and in the process of closing down the Alfa of Tacoma shop. I think he felt sorry for me though because after I explained the situation to him and let him know I was way in over my head on the deal, he agreed to take look at the car anyway and invited me to come by.

When I met Carlo at his shop in Tacoma and he took me around to show me all the different cars and explained all their histories. He told me stories about his days working in Formula One, about the people he met and the cars he worked on.

He knew about all the Italian makes and frequently did work on F40's, Testarossas, and when I was there he took me through a million dollar Lamborghini Miura that he just completed for a customer.

The point is that people trusted him.

He knew what he was doing.

He was a joy to talk with.

Carlo, you will be missed!

-Nathanael

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CORNER SHOP

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PHOTOS

KYLE BARNES

LOS ANGELES is a labyrinth of small specialty shops. Maybe on your next drive, take the time to look around. It is possible you might discover someone like EBENEZER—a skilled specialist off the beaten path—carving out their little corner of this vast concrete jungle. If you find them, support them. Small businesses for life!

-Kyle



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Swipe left.

Swipe left.

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PORSCHE !

WORDS

JESSICA SIERACKI

PHOTOS

ANDREW CARPENTER + JESSICA SIERACKI



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“Who is this guy?

Am I in space right now?

Am I dreaming?

What the fuck is going on?"

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W hat's the first thing you do when a 16-year relationship ends? You see what the bizarre world of online dating has to offer.

Never in a million years did I think I’d be swiping through Tinder profiles and see an arctic silver 996 just like mine.

“What’s this guy’s deal?” I thought to myself as I perk up to make sure I’m seeing this correctly. I swipe right.

Match!

I responded within seconds asking what year his car was.

A 2002, just like mine. Clearly, with or without any love connection, this Brent guy with the Targa and I needed to hook up. He likes cars, Hifi, and cats; he’s approved! We plan to meet in person at a brewery with our cars and feel each other out. I had all the butterflies driving out to meet Brent for the first time and basically melted when I saw the smile on his face as I pulled up next to him.

We nerd out on the cars, have a beer, and then he asks me if I’d like to sneak a tour of Blue Origin where he works building spaceships... No big deal. We drive down to the spaceship factory in our matching Porsche’s and take a look around. Just past the lobby there is a very grand Jules Verne replica spacecraft spanning two stories. Brent takes me to the second story and we step inside this time machine of historic space travel. I’m starry-eyed as we take a seat on the circular velvet tufted couch. Brent opens a secret cabinet with a Woodford Reserve stash. We both take a shot and then he kisses me.

Opposite: Early fall drive through the North Cascades



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REDEMPTION

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At this point I’m floating and wondering, “Who is this guy?” Am I in space right now? Am I dreaming? What the fuck is going on?” We step back into the reality of the office cubicle farm and continue on to where the new space vehicles are being built. A part of me is starting to think that aliens must have abducted me to fulfill the prophecy of my future or some shit. After the tour, we exchanged numbers, say goodbye, and continued texting through the evening about music.

I send him a video of the obnoxious amount of speakers in my apartment with Stevie Ray Vaughn playing; SRV happens to be Brent’s favorite. We blab about more things we have in common and start planning drives. Throughout the hardships of life Brent has been there for me. Like the time he helped me diagnose an oil separator issue when I smoked out my fellow drivers during a track event. I was there for him when he thought he was going to lose power on the Aurora bridge.

Our mutual passion for Porsche and fast driving brought us together, now we are always there for each other. Flipping through a Bentley manual in the morning over coffee, sunset drives, racing each other through the Highway 99 tunnel in Seattle, rolling into Cars & Coffee together, day trips to Gig Harbor for Hi-Fi, we turn heads everywhere we go. Does it get any better?

We took things fast while driving really fast. I appreciate and love this man to the moon and back and thank the Tinder Gods every day that we both swiped right. The universe is wild people. Listen to it and fall in love with your car twin, the rest will sort itself out. 3

@modernsoundre

Left: Terrorizing Ballard, WA.



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THE MONACO GP WILL NOT BE TELEVISED BECAUSE IT WAS FUCKING CANCELED. WORDS + PHOTOGRAPHS

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NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO



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DISAPPOINTMENT

F

or the first time (sort of) since WWII, the Monaco Grand Prix has been canceled. The 2020 cancellation was due to the global coronavirus pandemic. Work had already begun on preparing the streets of Monte Carlo for the race—which was set to take place May 21-24. After a meeting between FIA, F1, and team bosses—the decision was made to cancel the event as it was deemed untenable.

In a statement, the Automobile Club of Monaco said, "The current situation concerning the worldwide pandemic and its unknown path of evolution, the lack of understanding as to the impact on the world championship, the uncertainty with regards to the participation of the teams, the multi-border restrictions for accessing the Principality of Monaco, the pressure on all implicated businesses, their dedicated staff who are unable to undertake the necessary installations, the availability of the indispensable workforce and volunteers (more than 1500) required for the success of the event means that the situation is no longer tenable."

Unsurprisingly, this decision came only hours after 62-yearold Prince Albert of Monaco confirmed that he had been diagnosed with COVID-19. One of the first high-profile figures in the world to contract the SARS-2-CoV virus.

Almost all 2020 Formula One races have either been postponed or canceled through July. At the time of this writing GP events affected were—Australia, Bahrain, Vietnam, China, Dutch, Spain, Monaco, Azerbaijan, Canada, France, Austria, and British. Formula E had been suspended indefinitely.

Red flag during GP2 crash.

Hypertrash had planned to cover the 2020 Monaco GP in May for this summer issue and to do a soft launch for the magazine in Monte Carlo. We already had the flights and accommodations booked, and were in the process of planning some modest activities with our local contacts. Then everything instantly fell a part like one of Scuderia Ferrari’s race day strategies.

While we cannot go Monaco for the GP this year unless a decision is made to reschedule it later in the season (a crushing defeat—fuck you COVID) we are still going to try and stay positive. Instead we will be presenting a photo retrospective from travels to previous grands prix in the following pages.

Specifically from 2012 to 2019 omitting 2015 as I did not attend due to a motorcycle trip from Los Angeles to Anchorage (story to be published in Hypertrash Quarterly later this year). Sadly this article is going to be short. It will basically be a quick photo dump catered toward those who prefer photos to words. A little overview of the sights at Monaco. But first, the following page has some fun facts about the Monaco GP—the oldest and most famous street circuit on the F1 the calendar— for the race fans.

Hopefully next year we can bring you some of the action from the 2021 GP—or at least that's our plan anyway. (continued on page 32)

Sergio Perez exiting Tabac (turn 12), for Sauber.

Opposite: Sebastian Vettel enters pit lane.



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FIRST RACE

MOST WINNING AYRTON SENNA (6) MCLAREN (15) MERCEDES (15)

ONLY WAR AND PANDEMICS STOP THE MONACO GP (MOSTLY) MONACO GP WARTIME RACING

FIRST WINNER WILLIAM GROVER-WILLIAMS (BUGATTI)

1938-1947 WWII Era: Races were intermittently run in varying forms.

LONGEST STINT

1938 and 1939: No races as war had broken out.

Until 2020, the Monaco GP was held uninterrupted for 64 years from 1955 to 2019 with wins by Maurice Trintignant (Ferrari) and Lewis Hamilton (Mercedes) respectively.

1940-1945: Races limited to a small number of events, no organized championship, majority of races held in U.S. (No Monaco GP due to WWII) 1946: First post WWII GP's to include defined F1 criteria with no organized championship. (No Monaco GP 1946 or 1947 due to WWII recovery)

WINS IN A ROW

1948 First post WWII Monaco GP with Giuseppe Farina winning for Maserati.

AYRTON SENNA (5) MCLAREN GRAHAM HILL (3) BRM ALAIN PROST (3) MCLAREN NICO ROSBERG (3) MERCEDES

1949: GP's continued with FIA definitions as the foundation for modern F1. Still no organized championship.

(No Monaco GP in 1949- Prince Louis II passes) 1950: Fourth season of FIA rules and the Inaugural World Championship of drivers.

1951-1954: GP's continue with FIA rules and the World Championship of Drivers.

(No Monaco GP 1951. 1953 and 1954 also canceled due to Antony Noghes announcing his retirement) 1955: Monaco GP continues uninterrupted with FIA rules and World Championship of Drivers until May 2020 (canceled due to COVID-19).

LAP RECORD 26

(RACE)

MAX VERSTAPPEN 1:14:260 MAY 27, 2018 6th (current) track configuration 

Opposite: Fans turn a vegetated hillside into bleachers to poach views of the action down pit lane.

DISCLAIMER: We pulled this data from a variety of sources, please contact us for corrections or our list of citations if interested.

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Felipe Massa approaching La Rascasse (turn 17).

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Scuderia Ferrari pit crew not particularly hyped about their practice tire changes.

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Sebastian Vettel checking out my sweet camera as he gets fitted in his RB8 by lead Red Bull mechanic Ole Schack. ďťż

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The Monaco GP is from another time. It is a proper street course inducted in an era before the FIA and standardized safety regulations. Monaco is one of only two circuits which have only one DRS zone, the other being Suzuka. This course requires absolute concentration and precision driving for the entire length of it. If you are offline by more than a few inches, you can hit the Armco barriers. It is very difficult to pass other cars. Driving through a city-state up to 320 km/h with tight corners and no run-off zones sounds like a tough day at the office.

Obviously there is the whole Monaco prestige—the obscene display of wealth, the yachts, and the Casino Monte Carlo as a backdrop for 007 films Never Say Never Again (1983) and GoldenEye (1995). But on this one weekend, everyone can be part of it, if you can get there.

There is a phenomenon that exists in all levels of sports. A disparity between the haves, the have-nots, the hopefuls… It’s no different from European football, or American NASCAR racing.

Contracts for millions of dollars for the sponsored, billions in revenue for the team owners. For all the showing of money and excess at the top, there are the fans from all levels who make the annual pilgrimage to feel the engine noise rattle in their chests and pierce their tympanic membranes.

As a city street course, it is essentially open to all. If you can get to La Condamine train station or drive into Monte Carlo. Once there the track is open all day and all night. Anyone can walk around the course, stop in and have a drink at La Rascasse and enjoy the sights and activity of race set up.

On any day leading up to Thursday practice, you can stroll down pit lane and have a peek in the garages, see the mechanics setting up the cars, practicing tire changes and driver extrication, and of course—you can see the drivers. They walk back and forth be-

tween the paddocks, the pits, and the media pen. All the spaces between these areas are city streets and sidewalks and open to all.

The perfect chance to meet your favorite driver and get a photo or autograph.

There is the perception that this race is for the rich and famous, snobby, and exclusive. All that is just marketing and media reel highlights. Street courses have this raw and gritty vibe to them and Monaco is no different. Anytime you put a red and white painted curb around a corner or paint a black and white checkered stripe on the street, you automatically introduce just a little bit of contamination to the area. Because racing—at its core—is a dirty, filthy habit. No matter how much carbon fiber or silicon you throw at it. Racing is an addiction.

Monaco has graffiti too. The first time I went I found a mosaic tile

by Invader glued to a building. Which makes sense—he is French after all. Invader is known for his ceramic tile mosaics modeled on the pixelated art of 1970s–1980s 8-bit video games, many of which depict aliens from the 1978 arcade game Space Invaders.

Almost every stage, section, and turn of this course has it’s Armco barrier butted up against a curb where just beyond the sidewalk is a shop, restaurant, pharmacy or apartment building. The starting grid, finish line, flaggers box, and podium are only a few meters perpendicular to a rue (road) called Rue Princess Caroline—a stretch of narrow cobble stoned street very similar to say—3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica, CA. If you don’t want to pay the 400-500 Euro ticket price to sit in the bleachers for the race and be restricted to watching the cars race by in a blur past that one corner for 72 laps, you can post up outside at a table in one of the restaurants on Rue Princess Caroline, have lunch, and watch the race on one of the dozens of flat screen TVs while you get your ears blown out as the F1 cars rip past you down the start/finish straight which will be three or four meters from the table you're sitting at. There's nothing quite like it. 3

@stateofnathan

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Mark Weber and Sebastian Vettel probably discussing something important.

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HYPERTRASH INTERVIEW

WITH LOTUS TEST DRIVER AND PCA INSTRUCTOR

PAUL BLAKE WORDS

RHYS HAYDON

PHOTOS

PAUL BLAKE

He probably wouldn’t be interested in talking with you about it. Scratch that, he certainly wouldn’t be interested in talking with you about it. Paul is not what anyone would consider social when talking about his racing past nor his accomplishments still being earned behind the wheel. Just for the posterity of this article I will share some basic accomplishments to set the mood. Former Lotus test driver, current head Porsche Club of America driving instructor for the Northwest region, multiple fastest lap times in the area in his stock GT3.

But that’s only part of the picture. He may not show up in his GT3. Maybe it’s not what he is feeling that day, and instead will show up in his NSX to dice it out with the GT crowd. That’s his style and his mystique. But sometimes people are not who they seem, but then again sometimes they are. Before the virus I sat down with Paul and listened to his clipped British accent set the record straight.

1985 Targa Tacoma, WA ,2016 

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GT3 at Pacific Raceways, WA

HYPERTRASH What’s your earliest memory of racing or race cars?

PAUL BLAKE I grew up in rural Yorkshire. My mom kept a horse at a remote stable and she taught me to drive in an Austin Mini in the horse field, I was about 13 or 14. I spent 3 years driving sideways in mud before I could even have a license. When I could finally drive on the roads, my friends and I would set up "rally stages" between villages on the tiny roads, 1 car width wide. If a car came the other way, both cars would have to put two wheels on the grass to pass, a technique that I still use on the track today!

Growing up in GB, was racing more popular or did you have someone who was an early influence?

Yes, racing and cars was everything. Rally, F1 and BTCC, in the 80s these things were fanatically followed. My dad was a mechanic and restored old Triumphs and Jags, so I was around cars all day every day for my entire life. Funny that my mom taught me how to drive though, and she was a much more aggressive driver than my dad! We didn't have money, but we had old cars lying around and my parents supported my endeavors 100%.

My dad was at every event I ever drove in until I moved to the US. My race driver influences early on were all rally drivers - Bjorn Waldegard, Hannu Mikola, Markku Alen and others like Ayrton 38



Senna, Andy Rouse, Alain Menu. I always watched the interviews as well as the races. I wanted to hear what they said and how they think. I always liked how calm and softly spoken the best drivers were. That spoke to me because I was quite a young man, but a crazy maniac behind the wheel.

What draws you to the track?

The track is the only place I can truly drive a car like I want to.

At what point did you know you were a fast driver?

I have a whole library of favorite race driver quotes that I memorize. One of them is Jim Clark, when asked "Why are you faster than everyone else, in the same car?" he replied "Why is everyone else so slow?". Now, I'm no Jim Clark, but that's my answer! When we did timed stages on the country roads in Yorkshire, in a 12-15 minute run I was 3 minutes quicker than my friends and I used to wonder if they were even trying.

What did driving for Lotus do for your development and do you feel that this was pivotal for your development as a driver?

Discipline. Being told what to do and when to do it and being able to execute on it in the car. I didn’t have much of that discipline

"Students ask me, how long does it take you to learn a new track?

1 lap.

It's just driving." thrashing around muddy fields.

You are now Chief Driving Instructor for the local PCA and they say teaching is one of the best ways to learn yourself. Do you think this has been true for you?

Yes. I'm 51 and I'm a better driver now than I was when I was racing at 25. I'm just not as physically fit and 50lbs heavier. Teaching others has taught me to analyze what I do, rather than just doing it, and in my PCA career I have been exposed to so many great coaches and drivers. The standard of driving worldwide is now so much better than it was in the 80s and 90s. I didn’t really receive any formal coaching. The BRDC (British Racing Drivers Club) started to put on testing days that functioned as "peer coaching days" in the mid 90s. This was before track days or DE days were even a thing. I was lucky enough to be at a few of those early days, it was pretty wild.

I remember a day at Silverstone - Derek Bell and Richard Atwood were just hanging around chatting and would come out on track if you asked them. I was out on track at the same time as Porsche testing their 911 GT1 car. I've had a very peripheral motorsports career, but I've been out on track with F1 and Le Mans winners!

I've shared the track with Bell and Atwood, Allan McNish and Dario and Marino Franchitti. So, like I said, no formal coaching, but very lucky to be around such incredible influences. I have not let go of that aggression and never will, but I reserve it for the right moments. I occasionally get out there and thrash on it, and drop wheels in the gravel and rumble over some curbs.

The vast array of cars you may show up to a track day with is incredible. Do you just drive what you feel like when you go in the garage, or how do you make that choice?

Well, I don't take them out on track as much as I used to, mostly now the GT3. For a few years up until last year I was regularly taking the NSX and Esprit and occasionally the Delta Integrale.

They are well set up cars, and surprisingly quick, especially the

NSX which is supercharged, big brakes, cooling, etc. The Esprit is wild on the edge. Much more of a handful than any 911! Poor old 911's get a bad reputation because some journalist in the 70s used the word "widow maker" and didn’t know how to throttle steer with a little bit of lag. 911s understeer and always have.

What about these older and slower cars brings you joy on the track?

Ask any 911 racer. They push into the corner, and rotate just the right amount on the way out. Predictable all day long. The Esprit I just love from my Lotus days, and it is HARD WORK to drive fast. Awful clutch and gear change, awful heavy steering (although the later power steering cars have exquisite feel), awful visibility, awful driving position, but when you get everything right it’s just pure driving. 300+hp out of that little 4 cylinder turbo coughing and spitting flames, the fumes getting to your head in the badly ventilated cabin! The NSX, I will say this: its the best car I've ever driven. New, old, race, street. My favorite of them all is the NA1 NSX. It helps if it has 375hp like mine, but the car is the complete package.

OK I should re-word that. The NSX is my favorite car I've ever driven. The Porsche GT3 is the best car I've ever driven. Now PCA is happy, too.

Do you consider track driving something you will always do? Like do people have to worry about 80-year-old Paul overtaking them?

I have a good friend, Bob, who is also a PCA Instructor and quick, positive driver. He's been racing a modified C6 corvette since it was new! Last year, we were at a driver’s meeting together about to go on track, and he said, "Paul, today's my birthday. I'm 73". So I aspire to be like Bob, and have at least another 22 years of hardcore track driving in front of me.

We all have inspirational people, is/are there a driver(s) that you feel were exceptional?

I mentioned the likes of Hannu Mikkola, Ari Vatenan, Ayrton Senna. I'm a big Kimi fan, too. But to me, more important and influential are the people I've met and raced with that I have found to be exceptional. Only a handful. In the late 90s I was racing a 944 and then later a 951 in SCCA in the mid west. My first day in the turbo, I was in my late 20s, being cocky and joked "nobody can stay with me" to a group of drivers. A small man in his 60s, called Earl, looked at me and said, "I can." He was driving a Honda CRX in a class below me. We chatted. We paired up in grid and he went out right behind me in a practice session. For 6 laps that bloody Honda was right on my rear bumper. It turned out he was a national autocross champion and a seasoned SCCA racer. He became my unofficial coach and mentor for 2 years.

(continued on page 43) 

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Using some curbs at PIR in a 2006 997S, 2010 40



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Top and bottom: Silverstone 1995, S4 Esprit

Photos: Paul's dad.

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"I actually get nervous in every pre-grid.

Every single time.

I overthink everything."

Many people wear special clothes or shoes to the track and you show up in tennis shoes and jeans, it seems like you approach driving dif ferently than some others. I bet your preparations are spent in other areas and I am curious as to where you feel you prepare yourself or your car?

Like Jim Clark said, "Why is everyone else so slow!?"

When I coach really good drivers, I don’t even waste time talking about driving skill, or racing lines, or car set-up. They already know all that. The last 0.5 second per lap is all mental. It’s a commitment.

Having said that all that, I actually get nervous in every pre-grid.

Every single time. I over think everything, I visualize the track in my head, sat in grid seems like 2 hours when its 2 minutes. I sometimes even feel physically queasy thinking so hard. But then, every single time, it disappears as I pull out of pit lane. Then it’s ON. _______ In the end I asked myself who is Paul? I had put off writing this conclusion for many weeks as I wrestled with myself over how to finish up an article on a driver who defies and defiles what I think of when I imagine the standard track rat. In the end the answer for me is that he is perhaps one of the last gentleman drivers. He may take offense to that, but his edgy grace has allowed him to spend more time behind the wheel than most, has allowed him partnerships with companies, and he doesn’t appear to be slowing down. He has become a silent mentor, (don’t tell him I said so) in how to keep your mouth shut and let your driving do the talking. A glimpse into his mind has allowed me to delve deeper into who he is and just when I think I have him figured out he says fuck you, and drives away. 3

Yes, I'm not an "equipment" nerd. Obviously safety is safety and that is my absolute number one priority every time I get in a race car, and any race driver will tell you the same thing. Porsche DE days allow a little more casual attire. My philosophy is this: My inputs into the steering wheel are more important than tire pressures. My feel of the car is more important than spring rates. The fact that I am on the throttle more than you is more important than horsepower. Knowing how to use slip is more important than grip. Yes, all those technical things help. But what I do is get in and drive.

Students ask me "How long does it take you to learn a new car?"

1 corner.

Students ask me "How long does it take you to learn a new track?"

1 lap.

It's just driving.

Right: Buttonwillow 1999, V8 Esprit. This was the Lotus V8 press car driven by Tiff Needell on Top Gear and by Jason Priestley in the Gumball Rally.



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GROWINGUP

fast HYPERTRASH INTERVIEW WITH KART RACER

JONATHAN MILES

WORDS + PHOTOGRAPHS NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO



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D E T E R M I N AT I O N

A conversation with kart racer JONATHAN MILES about karting, meeting your heroes, and what it's like growing up fast.

car I saw in person and it blew my mind. So I got a photo in front of it. Seeing that thing in person sort of sealed the deal for me. I was in.

What was it that grabbed your attention? What did you think was cool about it?

HYPERTRASH Alright! Thanks for sitting down with us today. We appreciate it. Let’s start with your name, age, where you’re from, and your racing number.

JONATHAN Hi! Jonathan Miles, 14 years old, born in Los Angeles. Currently living near Seattle, WA. Number 11x.

Thanks. Let talk about how you got started in karting. It’s kind of an interesting thing to be into and I assume most kids are playing soccer, baseball, or video games. How old were you when you first started karting?

I was six years old.

Six? Pretty young. So then how were you introduced to it?

What got you interested?

This whole thing started in the summer of 2011 when I was five.

There was this combination of events that aligned. The spark was when I was watching Cars 2 [Disney] and there was this character—a Formula One car named Francesco—and I had never seen a car like that before, super low, big wing, exposed fat tires. It just looked fast! I asked my mom about it like, “What kind of car is that?” Turns out she knew a lot about F1 and used to follow the races in the 90s when Schumacher was winning everything. I thought it was the coolest thing ever. She saw that I was interested and it re-sparked her interest—so she immediately signed up for whatever cable network had F1. I think it was NBC Sports Network. So we started watching the races on TV. I was hooked. That was the Sebastian Vettel era. He was the champ.

Then right after Cars 2 the Ayrton Senna documentary, SENNA [StudioCanal] got released and was playing at the Sherman Oaks Galleria. My parents took me to see that and I was fixated on the parts where he was karting as a kid and it blew my mind… “Kids can drive? How do I do this?”

That’s when we sort of realized that basically all the drivers start out karting. That’s the first step. The next day my mom starting researching the whole karting thing and we fell down that rabbit hole. Turns out you had to be six years old to drive, and I was five so we had to wait a bit and I just kept watching the rest of that season.

Then later that year there was the Los Angeles Auto Show. My grandparents were visiting from Vancouver B.C. so I went with them and my parents. At the show we found what was either Sebastian Vettel’s RB6—the 2010 F1 championship wining car—or an RB7 chassis show car on display. Either way it was the first F1

At that age the cars just looked like little rocket ships! They are so detailed in design and function. Everything about it was so futuristic. I thought it would be so cool to do in real life.

How did you get started with driving?

After I turned six, my mom found this karting school in Ventura, CA called Jim Hall Racing. So she called, made an appointment and we drove up on a Saturday.

So you just show up and drive?

Well, no. We started out at the school with some indoor classroom stuff talking about the flags and what they meant, racing line, braking point, apex, corner entry and exit. On track I started in one of their karts with a tow strap on the back bumper attached to the instructor in a golf cart behind me so I could get used to staying on the track and turning through corners. Eventually I started going faster and broke free of the tow strap and the instructor had to chase me down. There's a video of me driving and the instructor is running after me trying to get me to stop.

I went back every weekend until I got my “super license” after completing their kid kart course. It all sounds a little silly going to a racing school at six years old, but I think it was actually very important because when you’re that young I don’t think you would just pick up on that and I think it gives you a little knowledge boost. Because at that age there’s already a lot of kids in the class who may have been racing for a year or two ahead of you. That way you can spend time trying to get fast on track instead trying to figure out what's going on.

So it sounds like your mom was really the race fan in the family. That’s rad…

Yeah she knew so much about it and where to put me and how to get started. I also found out that my grandpa had been really into it as well so maybe that’s where she got it from. He had worked for Honda/Acura at some point and gone to a few races back in the day for business.

Do you know which races?

He went to some races in the 90s and saw Schumacher and Senna race, I believe he might of have been at the race where Ayrton Senna died. He also went to Suzuka.

Crazy. So you were six. You’re just getting into F1. You start karting. Who is your hero? Who do you look up to at that time? 

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First drive at Jim Hall Racing, Ventura, CA 2012

Kid kart racing at APEX, Lake Perris, CA 2013

Leading the pack at PSGKA, Spnanaway, WA 2019

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Actually I wish I was born a little bit earlier because in the few years before I started watching it was the era of rivalry between McLaren, Red Bull, Lewis Hamilton, Alonso, Sebastian Vettel, Mark Weber… They all had this big clash and eventually Vettel came out on top with Red Bull Racing and got four championships in a row. Which is pretty impressive. So just coming in new as a little kid you’re just automatically following the leader. You pick the fast guy. And he was.

You sort of bandwagon a little bit? Whoever is the champion you’re already for them?

Yeah, exactly.

Let’s talk about your driving. How do you transition from an arrive-and-drive racing school to then getting out there on your own and racing? What’s needed?

Well you need to eventually get your own kart ‘cause you can’t take the one from the racing school. And so we did. In 2012 my parents got me a little used kid kart chassis with a 50cc Comer engine, which it basically a single cylinder water pump or lawn mower engine rebadged for kart racing.

So that’s when it all started. I was ripping around in that at some local tracks.

Which tracks were you driving?

Practice session at PSGKA, Spnanaway, WA 2017

Normally there aren’t just racing tracks all over the place. I was lucky to start in California because there’s actually quite a few tracks. Obviously not in the dead center of Los Angeles but they were close enough to where driving out to a track wasn’t that much of a headache. So we rented a pickup truck to put the kart in and headed out to APEX Racing in Lake Perris, Adams in Riverside, and CalSpeed in Fontana, which was a large track and very popular…

Isn’t there a NASCAR oval there?

I think so.

What was the Fontana track like?

At that age it seemed huge. It was basically set up on an asphalt parking lot with cones and plastic barriers. Super wide.

Lots of turns. Long straights.

Talk about your experiences there, first race?

Yeah I had my first race at that track. Super chaotic. I was nervous. We showed up at the track in a pickup truck. Bare bones: kart, suit, fuel, some tools. And it was hot. One of the other teams insisted we use their spare pop-up tent because we didn’t think to bring one and it was 90 degrees with no shade.



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The pit area was just this massive parking lot and it was full of motorhomes, trailers, huge team canopy tents like you see at SCCA type events. People are towing carts back and forth form the pits to the starting grid because it was too far to walk. There were so many different classes from kid karts to seniors. local, regional and national races all happening on the same weekend. It was apparent that people were spending lots of money. Super competitive. Everyone was out there trying to get that tenth of a second off their times. A bunch of six-year-olds and a couple families were spending close to $100K a year for equipment, hiring coaches, hiring tuners, and driving all over the country.

Haha yeah when people in the U.S. find about my racing they always ask, "Oh are you trying to get into Indy Car or NASCAR?” And I’m like, “No, not really” but I think that’s the vision for U.S. kids just because F1 is more of a European thing, that’s where it started and that’s it’s breeding ground as most of the teams are located there. Only just recently there was a new American team— Haas F1—they’re actually a NASCAR team too but it has sparked a little bit of U.S. interest. But for most kids and adults they focus on NASCAR because it’s more integrated in their culture.

But this is the kind of thing where you need to spend the money to be in it. It’s crazy, even at the kid kart level, it’s approached like Formula One.

It was a little overwhelming. For the kid karts there was a huge field of drivers, each split up into twenty karts. I was thrown into this pool of drivers who had been driving longer and a couple of these kids already had sponsors, one kid drove for Monster Energy and another for McDonald’s. A lot of them were there with CRG, Tony Kart or Birel—proper racing teams. Then there’s me and my parents with our little used kid kart just having a little fun… Mom

Do you think at that level in the U.S. most of those kids that were racing wanted to do F1 or NASCAR?

So give us a few highlights of that first race you went to.

TAG Junior kart set up and practice at PSGKA, Spnanaway, WA 2018



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is doing all the paper work, entry forms—dad’s setting up the kart, wrenching, tuning, prepping, getting my helmet and gloves on. Everyone’s running their engines in, screaming RPM’s, twostroke smoke blotting out the sun. You never forget those sights and smells. Chaos!

My kart turned out to actually be pretty quick and I qualified sort of at the front of the mid-fielders. First race goes and I’m not doing to bad trailing the lead cars. It’s the middle of the race and right in front of me is this super fast girl who’s consistently one of the lead drivers, she’s skilled but has a reputation around the pits as being aggressive, she was battling side by side with a kid in front.

We came out of a corner and into a straight and she tried to squeeze him a little and pass. These are open wheel karts, no wheel guards like the karts at K1 Speed. So she rubbed wheels and it hopped her up and she flipped over and went off. Like completely upside down on her head as I swerved to miss her and drove past thinking, “Oh my god!”

Instant red flags. I raised my hand, we all slowed down and the marshals corralled all of us off to the side of the track. The race was over and we waited there while they managed the girl that flipped.

That was super crazy for me 'cause that was my first race, first time at a race and first time racing. I thought, “Does this happen at every race?”

Was she OK? So it turns out that the crash happened right in front of the pit lane where all the parents were watching, and my dad was standing right there. He used to be an EMT so I guess he and the girls father jumped over the fence and ran to get the kart off her because she was pinned underneath it and it was still running and smoking. They were there first and got her out and on the ground to check her over. The dad was trying to picke her up and hold her or soemthing and my dad was like, No! No! You gottta lay her flat!" or whatever. It was a whole scene. Then eventually the track medic got there—but she was OK. Then later that afternoon, and this shocked me, once you crash you can’t use that helmet again so her dad was running around the pits asking other families if he could borrow a helmet—to get back in the next race! Looking back now if that was me who flipped over my parents would have had me in the ER for a CT scan. But she went right back out there and drove.

Insane. And what about your racing? Any hair raising moments?

There was a practice session that I don’t really remember where I went off and hit the wall super hard and taco’d my chassis pretty badly. Like so bad it needed to go on a jig to be straightened. But I have no idea how it happened. I’ve had fuel tank fall off, busted countless chains, shredded my brake rotor and snapped my rear axle in half. Also came into the pits too hot once and smashed into my dad’s ankle as he jumped out of the way. Good times.

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So overall how did you do racing in California? Any big wins or podiums?

Fontana was always challenging just because the skill level and competition was so high. That was like the peak level of kart racing in SoCal. I fought hard and always had fun though. I think I was usually top ten and maybe top five a few times. It was great race training and I learned a lot.

I was much more successful at APEX in Lake Perris. It was a tighter track and more suited to the kart I was in at that time. I had quite a few podiums there. I also had a racing coach specific to that track so that definitely helped because everyone was so good and I was still in my first two seasons of racing. And there was this hair pin at turn six that just ruined my life. I could never get the entry right and I would spin every time! Eventually I got it though and during a race where I was going to get a second place finish, as I was approaching I saw my mom cheering me on and I thought she was trying to get my attention for some reason and it threw me off and I spun, again. I think I finished fourth or something. I was crushed.

Looking back it’s sort of a funny moment but I was so bummed that day. Racing in SoCal in 2012 and 2013 were challenging but I only wanted to keep racing. In the middle of 2013 was when I taco’d my chassis in the wall at Adam’s Raceway so I didn’t finish the season because of that and because that summer we moved to Washington State.

Did you keep racing?

I stopped for two seasons because of the move, starting a new school and getting settled. Then in 2015 after researching the racing scene in the Pacific Northwest we decided to get back after it.

By that point I had aged out of kid karts and was now in cadets.

What’s the difference between a kid kart and a cadet?

Basically the dimensions of the chassis and size of the engine. Kid kart is a 50cc engine and cadet is a Rotax 125cc engine detuned and restricted to 80cc—called Micro Max—or a regular tuned and unrestricted 125cc Mini-Max. So I was now in the 80cc Micro Max class and I needed a new kart. We found one in Las Vegas, NV. After my dad went back and forth over the phone with the seller, he struck a deal and we rented another pick-up truck and drove from Seattle to Vegas.

Hang on, you drove to Vegas to buy a go-kart?

Yeah, there was not a big selection of decent used cadet karts where we were. Not like in SoCal. So we found this Birel chassis with a Rotax engine and went to get it.

How long did that take you?

We did it in a weekend?

A weekend?

Yeah. We left late Friday afternoon, my dad drove through the night straight to Vegas. We arrived at the guys house around 11am on Saturday. I drove the kart around the neighborhood, we bought it, loaded it up, went to In and Out Burger for lunch (or breakfast).

Then drove to Idaho to a hotel Saturday night. Funny thing, we didn’t want to leave the kart in the back of the pick-up overnight, so we snuck it into the hotel and my dad lifted it sideways into our room. I fell asleep staring at it leaning up against the wall. The next day we drove from Idaho to Seattle. And got back home Sunday evening. It was super exciting. So in October of 2015 I had a Rotax cadet and just spent time on track getting my skills back.I started racing again for the 2016 season.

How old were you and how was racing going for you at that time?

I think by then I was 10 or 11. It was ok. Very different from SoCal. Fewer people racing. More relaxed. More rain.

Was it difficult adapting to the wet coming from California?

I took to it. It’s helpful learning how to control the kart when it breaks loose. If the track is wet or damp during practice but it’s not raining, my dad puts me out on slicks so I can learn how to control the slide. It’s been really helpful and drifting is fun!

Where do you race in Washington?

I mainly race at this small track called Puget Sound Go-Karting Association (PSGKA) in Spanaway, WA. I think it’s the oldest karting track in the state. It was built in the 1960’s or something. It would basically be like driving at Monaco or the Targa Florio. An older track built for a different era. It’s quick, thirty-second laps.

There’s only like three significant corners but you have to get every corner right. Very technical. Different surfaces, asphalt with some concrete sections. Super uneven and not well graded—bumpy.

Many high curbs but dirt run-off areas into the grass. Lots of elevation with off camber corners. The first turn off the line is this uphill right hand sweeper leading to an off-camber mini-straight into a super fast left hander. It’s too tight where you need it wide.

Nowhere to pass. People get squeezed off frequently. It’s super fun but you can tell it was built in a different time. I mean just think about where racing was in the 1960’s and you can almost picture this track in your mind.

And the cadet racing?

The cadet racing was just ok. For the 2016 and 2017 seasons most of the kids my age were racing the GAS Animal 4-stroke class, which was lame, so I was put in a mixed class with my Rotax and this other class called L0206 with kids driving Briggs and Stratton engines. There was this one kid, Jacob, who was blisteringly fast.

We became friends he was like my main rival. I had someone to race against and that challenged me. My Rotax was a little faster so I was always ahead of the field and won most of the races and ended up winning the 2017 Championship for my class. But it didn’t quite feel that same.

How did the 2018 season go?

Then the 2018 season got exciting. I turned 12 that year and aged out of the cadets and finally got into the adult chassis, so new kart and new engine. We found a local distributor for iKart (Indianapolis Racing Karts) who also sold the IAME X30 125cc engines which put me in the TAG Junior class. Which is like the premiere teenage class. Super fast 2-stroke engines, fatter tires in the rear, blistering competition. So we got this new kart and engine, and my dad hired a mechanic/instructor to get us settled in this new class.

I think we spent an entire weekend setting the kart up, tuning, counterbalancing it with weights, and the seat... The seat was too big so we had to get a new smaller Tillett seat and bolt it inside the adult seat and then add extensions on the pedals so I could reach.

Driving that kart for the first time was scary. The torque on that thing was insane. I went from a sort of used beater kart to this new chassis and ultra powerful purpose built Italian racing engine.

My friend Jacob also got a new kart and engine and moved into the TAG Junior class as well. So we were the two new twelve-year-old kids racing against these more seasoned drivers, some of them were fifteen and sixteen years old, and they had raced CAN-AM and National events. So it was tough. Mostly it was just a grind. Mixed results. Got robbed a few podiums by this other racer who just did not drive well and takes more a carnival—bumper car approach to racing. We tangled a lot. He knocked me off track a bunch. It was a problem and there was a conversation with the stewards about aggressive driving. I mean I am all for going racing, but when you're the one who ends up in the grass on race day a bunch of times, it becomes a problem. I always out-raced this dude in the rain though, but those older, stronger guys in the front… 2018 was frustrating and just a real challenge.

Did you race the 2019 season as well?

Oh definitely. At this point we are all in. 2019 started off a little slow. We moved homes that February so March was tough because there was a new team that started coming up from Oregon with these different engines by PRD or something—called Green Heads, which are just a little quicker than the IAME X30’s. Anyway these guys were the new leaders and team to beat. So April came and was just whatever. Then I missed a double header in May because we did our annual trip to the Formula One Grand Prix in Monaco. So that was like a summer break. But just before we left we had sent my engine to this tuner in the Mid-West and when I came back to race in June, we put the kart together and did some track testing.

It was like a whole new world. I was getting lap times like 30.6 (seconds) which is as quick as you can get on that track. Even for the adults in the shifter karts. By the time the race came around I was qualifying consistency in the top three. So I felt like I had arrived and for the rest of that year I was either on the podium or close to it every race—when I didn’t get crashed out or have a mechanical failure—which seemed to happen frequently. Karting is just hard you know? I think my best finish though was when I was battling 

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POWERPLANT PEDIGREE PURPOSE BUILT RACING ENGINE MADE IN BERGAMO ITALY JUST OUTSIDE OF MILAN 41KM FROM MONZA GP CIRCUIT

MANUFACTURER

IAME S.P.A.

MODEL

X30 (U.S. SPEC)

CYLINDER CLASS DISPLACEMENT FUEL

TAG JUNIOR 125CC

98 RON

OIL

5% (20:1)

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CIK HOMOLOGATED

the guys with the Green Head engines, I qualified third but fought my way into second place in that first turn, and held the position for all twelve laps and finished second. Splitting them up on the podium. That was some real fun.

Well Vettel did not continue his contract with Ferrari so the that’s been the F1 topic in the media. Everyone was speculating who would fill his spot. [Carlos] Sainz or [Daniel] Ricciardo, it turned out to be Sainz.

How has the 2020 season been going?

Where’s Vettel going to go?

Well, you know… It hasn’t. Obviously this pandemic has caused some problems. Everything has been canceled—all the way up to Formula One. Looking back it was funny because we were stressing about getting my engine to get tuned before the season opener in March, because we sent it out a little bit late. We waited because of the position my parents are in—they work in medicine—we had a little bit of warning of what was coming with the coronavirus so we wanted to see what was going to happen. We sent the engine out anyway just in case the season would start on time, but then things started closing down and the day before the first race it all got pushed back. Nobody thought COVID-19 would escalate to where it is now. Like, “Oh there’s this virus circulating, we need to postpone racing” to then having a national lockdown. So we can’t race and we can’t watch racing on TV.

We don’t know. I don’t think he’s going to go anywhere. I think he’s going to retire. People say Mercedes but their drivers are set.

I think George Russell could take [Valteri] Bottas’ seat if he left.

The only place I see Vettel going would be Mercedes. I think that would be amazing but unlikely. And Red Bull doesn’t want him, they have [Max] Verstappen and [Alexander] Albon. I really just see Vettel retiring at the end of 2020.

So now it’s June and your 2020 racing season is almost half over, do you think it will reopen?

I don’t know. August maybe? I think Indy Car started up…

What are some of the big headlines in F1 at the moment?

Earlier you said you went to the Monaco GP? Can you tell us more about that?

Yeah so the second year we started following Formula One we went to Monaco for the GP because that’s the one you go to, it’s got all the history. And Vettel is my hero so I was thinking, “Wow what if I got to meet him!” Anyway I had this photo of me in front of his 2010 RB6 at the LA Auto Show and Monaco is an open street course so you can just walk around the track and pits. We were hanging out by the Red Bull garages and we asked one of the guys on the Red Bull team if he could give the photo to Vettel to sign.

This guy turned out to be John Ayers, one of the team managers that handles all the race set up for all the tracks around the world.

He’s pretty high up and looks at the photo and see’s the car and asks us where we are from, we say Los Angeles and he’s instantly amazed that this little kid came from LA to have Sebastian sign this silly little photo. Anyway he says Seb’s in a meeting a but he’ll see what he can do so he takes the photograph and tell’s us to come back later.

We go walk around the paddock and come back after an hour or whatever, and John comes back out with the photo and Seb signed it! I couldn’t believe it. That was rad. But then the four craziest things happened next… First, he says, “Seb’s still in a meeting, but he said he wants to meet you.” And I’m like, “What?” And I look at my parent and say, “Ok…?” and they're like, “Yes of course!” And I’m thinking to myself, “Wait, Seb wants to meet me? That’s cool!”

But if that wasn’t insane enough the second thing happened.

John says to us, “Would you guys like to come into the garage and have a look at the car?” So obviously we are all just like nodding our heads like a bunch or weirdos. John brings us over the Armco barriers past security onto the actual pit lane and then into the Red Bull garage where Seb’s RB8 is up on the jacks being put together.

He’s telling us about the car and what’s what and not to take any photos of the side of the car because that’s where all the “secret tech” is and I meet the mechanics. Then, and this is where it gets crazy. Third thing—John picks me up and puts me INSIDE Seb’s RB8. Like in the cockpit! Then he puts the STEERING WHEEL in my hands! And all the mechanics are smiling and laughing and they have me hold my hand up and point for #1!



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"When I saw Vettel later that day I let him know that I sat in his car before he did..."

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I’m like seven or something and I don’t really understand what’s going on and I don’t think I really understood the significance of it at that moment. But there I was standing in the cockpit of Sebastian Vettel’s Formula One car, holding the steering wheel, inside the Reb Bull garage at the Monaco Grand Prix! My mom is standing off the to side looking like she’s losing her mind! Eye’s the size of saucer plates almost about to cry, my dad’s trying to be cool about it like this is all normal.

So we take photos and the mechanics are trying to explain what all the buttons on the wheel do and I’m like “Uh huh…” like a child does and they think it’s hilarious. Then we walk around the back of the garage to look at all the telemetry stuff and then walked over to the Red Bull Barge.

And then the fourth and final insane thing happens—Vettel comes down from his meeting and I get to meet him—and I don’t remember this specifically but apparently when I saw Vettel later that day I let him know that I sat his car before he did. And he just laughed. We spoke for a bit. He asked me where I’m from and if I race and if I wanted to race F1. He was super nice and made time to meet me and I appreciate that.

That is insane.

Yeah it was my first time at that GP, or any GP and that's the kind of access you get. At that moment I thought that sort of thing must just happen all the time. But looking back, all the times I've gone, I don't remember seeing anyone, especially children getting pulled over the Armco barrier and going into the garages. I mean not that it doesn't happen, but I think it's sort of rare. Especially if you think about how restricted dedicated race tracks are. You can't get anywhere near the pits. That's why old street courses, places like Monaco are special. Especially now that F1 is changing. And even more so now with this COVID thing. Are we even ever going to be able to do that again?

So yeah, it turned out that I sat in the winning car that year because Seb ended up winning the championship in 2012. Then again in 2013, his last championship so far. It was crazy. I had never meet anyone famous before.

Yeah they say never meet your heros, do you think that’s true and what was that like for you?

I think it makes it more special because then you find out if they’re actually your hero. It makes it real, you freaking talk to them, you shook their hand. You’re like, “I could be this person.” The point being it’s not some untouchable goal. And you know—I’m just some kid that likes to race—a fan. I’m not like the child of a celebrity, I’m just some random kid from LA who shows up at this race.

There weren’t like any TV cameras around or media. And he made time to come and meet me. And that’s what makes a hero to a kid, being acknowledged by them.

Turn 16, circuit di Monaco

So anyway, because of that whole experience, it was such a blast, we keep going back. And every year you just meet more and more 

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Monaco GP—Jonathan in the Red Bull Garage at the wheel of Sebastian Vettel's RB8 with lead Red Bull mechanic Ole Schack (top right), team mechanics, and John Ayers (bottom far right), who manages logistics and set-up for Red Bull F1.

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of the drivers. Red Bull has this crazy barge that they park in the harbor for the week where the drivers and staff hang out and have lunch, they throw their after race parties there. They even have a swimming pool up on the top of it. I got to go on that thing one year and get a tour. I really have to thank John Ayers for hooking all this stuff up. Ever since that first year we see him every time we go and he's the coolest.

Do you have any other interesting memorabilia from those trips? Did you get to keep the steering wheel after the race or anything?

Haha! No, but I do have something. After a couple years of kart racing I sized out of my first helmet and got another one. So in 2017 I stuffed my old helmet in my backpack before we left for the airport because I thought it would be cool to have all the drivers sign it. I didn’t tell my parents my plan and they didn’t notice it until we were already on the plane. After we took off I went to get my DS [Nintendo] out of my backpack and I had to pull the helmet out to get it and my dad saw it had a proper flip out! “What the hell is that doing here?” He shouts quietly. “I want to get the drivers to sign it.” I replied. He smiles. Enough said. And that was it. That became the goal of the trip.

How did you do?

Really good. We got eighteen of the drivers that weekend. I think I am missing Kimi, Lewis and a few other of the rookie drivers. Got a few of the big names though like Sebastian, Verstappen, Ricciardo, and Niki Lauda!

Woah!

Sebastians was the hardest to get. I was waiting all day trying to see him walking around the pits. It was getting late in the afternoon and we were talking about calling it quits. So we decided to give it a few more minutes. Then we heard a little commotion over at the paddock exit where the drivers leave to get to the garages on pit lane. I though it had to be Vettel, so I grabbed the helmet from my dad and took off towards the crowd and just caught a glimpse of him in his red Ferrari shirt. He was running on a section of the track just past La Rascasse—which is this corner named after the bar that it wraps around—toward the pit lane entrance leading to the garages. He tried to go around this sneaky way to avoid getting mobbed.

So I’m chasing him and so are a bunch of other people trying to get a photo or an autograph. We’re all chasing him but I’m out in front of the crowd and I’m gaining on him. Eventually I pull away from the group and run up along side him with the helmet stretched out in front of him yelling, “Seb! Seb! Please sign my helmet!” He see’s the helmet and I guess it was interesting enough for him to stop 'cause he put his name right in front on the forehead.

And then took off again to get to wherever he was going before anyone else got close enough to get his autograph.

So the joke around the house is that—technically speaking—I raced Seb in Monaco and caught up to him. Maybe that means I’m as fast him—at least on foot?



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Jonathan's retired kid karting helmet signed by 18 of the 2017 Monaco F1 drivers.

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1- Will Buxton, NBCSN 2- Ole Schack, Red Bull Mechanic 3- Niki Lauda!

4- Valteri Bottas, Mercedes 5- Jonathan with Pirelli softs 6- Max Verstappen, Red Bull 7- Daniel Ricciardo, Red Bull 8- Charles Leclerc, Alfa Romeo

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I mean it sounds reasonable to me. So I think we will start wrapping this up here, but I’d like to know what is it about karting that captures you? Why do you do racing as a kid and teenager instead of more conventional sports like basketball or baseball?

Yeah, I do weird hobbies like sailing, cross-country running, kart racing, and skateboarding. I think I like the sports that are frustrating? Not to sound rude but anyone can kick a soccer ball or catch a football, obviously not at the professional level, but you know?

I like sports that are super hard mentally. I think with driving it’s just the frustration—it’s really fun because you’re like, “How can can I get a tenth off, how can I get two-tenths off my laps times?”

You’re always hypothesizing, "Are new tires going to help me? Do I need to re-jet my carb? Where can I save time?" Then you make those changes and it’s not enough so then you start looking at your racing line, or your braking zones, “Can I brake later here?” It’s a complex puzzle with so many variables. Then when you get it, that one lap you see a 30.2 flash on the screen, that feeling. That’s what it is.

I feel like it’s so much more rewarding than other sports. I’ve started skateboarding in the last year and that’s one of the most mentally frustrating and physically painful things I’ve ever done.

The repetition is part of it. You have to do it over and over and over. And if you make a mistake it can be a disaster—just like in karting. Like shooting hoops can be repetitive and if you miss your three-pointer it sucks. But if you fall trying a frontside grind or a kick flip down some stairs—or if you miss a corner and go into the wall at speed—it can be really painful and expensive.

And I love that. And it’s not boring to drive a kart around because it’s so fast and exhilarating coupled with the frustration of the grind and the payoff, it just all comes to together. I played premiere soccer and I think once you get the basics after grinding for years you’re just trying to kick this ball into a net. But with karting or skateboarding the repetition and reward is so much more for me.

What about the apparent difference between team sports versus the things that you’re into which are more individual but can be done with other people?

I get frustrated by team sports because if you let your team down, or your team lets you down, I feel like that’s an unnecessary pain.

Why not just do it on your own and never have to worry about who made the mistake? That way you can only blame yourself and figure out what you can do better. And having to overcompensate for you teammates. Or maybe you’re the one letting down the team and when the team wins—did you really win—or was it the star forward? That whole piece is gone. It’s just you, you don’t worry about anyone else or what people think.

Do any of your other friends do the activities you do?

No, none of my close friends do more than two of the things I do. Some might try to skateboard a little, or maybe sail, I know one person who rides dirt bikes. No one races karts. And that’s a frustrating thing—it’s hard to relate to people at school because no one really does what I do so no one really takes it seriously. So I 62



have to just work through that.

It’s isolating.

Yeah it is. It can be lonely. No one at school truly understands what I’m doing. I talk about racing in sailing regattas and they think it’s like some little hokey pokey bathtub thing. They don’t get what it takes to rig a boat and sail in a regatta for five hours by yourself out on the open water at 12 years old. It’s a little different from being out on the soccer field and your mom is bringing you orange slices at half time. If I talk about karting they think it’s like recreational indoor karting. No one understand the severity of it all, like that girl who flipped in Fontana. Or like skateboarding, they don’t understand how long it takes to actually learn to ollie and get up on a curb and grind it clean without breaking your wrist.

I went to a friends birthday party at an indoor kart track once, and a few of my friends who knew I race karts were like, “We're going to crush you out there!” And just before the race I pulled a James Hunt and barfed because I got nervous. Like there was this self-expectation that if I don’t do well then they really aren’t going to take me seriously. But I got in that indoor kart and just crushed every single person out there and lapped them all. They were quiet about it after that. Typical teenage movie stuff.

But at the same time once I’m away from the social thing I can self reflect and I think, “Wow I’ve done a lot” and I feel proud about what I’ve done.

What are you getting from that that makes you keep doing it instead of just quitting and picking up the soccer ball with your buddies?

I think it’s better that you’re proud of yourself than other people being proud of you. Because when you do stuff so other people are proud of you, you’re only willing to do that grind if they care.

Then as soon as those people lose interest you’re done. And you’ll never feel good about it because you were just doing a thing for someone else. And that’s a waste of time just trying to impress others. But when you are the fuel to the fire—that never stops. It’s on you.

So what is the ultimate goal with your karting?

The goal is Formula One. I want to race in the Formula series and work my way up to F1, absolutely. I realize there’s only like 20 seats available if Williams doesn’t end up having to quit—and I know if your dad is wealthy he can buy you a team so you can get a seat— but I will have to work my way through the ranks.

So you've been to Europe a bunch of times, do you like it?

Would you move there to continue racing and make a go of your F1 dreams? Are you dedicated enough to make that move?

Oh in a heartbeat. I would move there now. F1 has always been the only goal. Driving is what I've been doing most of my life and we are still only at the beginning of this story. 3

AMERICAN RESURGENCE OUR LOS ANGELES CORRESPONDENT SITS DOWN WITH FORD ENTHUSIAST JEAN-LOUIS BESANCON OF WINDSOR AND KENT TO DEBATE SOME AGE-OLD CAR POLITICS WORDS + PHOTOS

KYLE BARNES

@hamburgerfantasy 

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JEAN-LOUIS BESANCON 64

WINDSOR AND KENT Costa Mesa, CA of



Jean-Louis runs his shop WINDSOR AND KENT in Costa Mesa, CA where he hopes to work on his own cars someday.

Instead he typically spends most of his time working on a variety of other peoples cars.

Ranging from six figure period racers to rusted bruisers.

His af finity for the Ford brand runs deep.

Special power: LOTUS CORTINAS

_____________ HYPERTRASH What’s your name and how do you get paid?

JEAN-LOUIS BESANCON Owner/Chief Mechanic/Janitor at Windsor and Kent.

Where are you from?

Born in Santa Ana, CA. What city do you currently live?

Costa Mesa, CA. Tell us a secret about yourself.

I own cars that aren’t Fords.

POLITICS Ford or Ferrari?

Ford of course.

At auction: McQueen's Bullit Mustang sold for $3.4M. Miami Vice Ferrari Testarossa sold for $151K. The OG Batmobile sold for $4.6M. Assuming they were all valued at $1M, which one would you have and why?

Batmobile because it would send my Halloween costuming game over the top.

If you had Bullit would you restore it or leave as-is?

Leave What aspect of Ford do you admire most?

The Man was an Anti-Semite so not much love there. But them 60’s Fords are something special.

Hank the Deuce (HFII), automotive genius or big baby?

Big baby. 

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Enzo, automotive genius or Mafia Boss?

Both.

If you could have anything as a daily driver, what would it be?

Gt40 MK 2.

Dan Gurney or Jim Clark?

Damn you for making me choose! Clark.

If you could have any unobtainium car as a daily, what would it be?

Alan Mann Racing 64 Falcon Sprint that took Frank Gardner to the 67 British Touring Car Championship.

Niki Lauda or James Hunt?

Lauda.

Ayrton Senna or Alain Prost?

Senna.

Max Verstappen or Charles LeClerc?

Too soon to tell. I’ll go with Charlie due to my 5 year old daughters obsession with him.

CARS How many cars do you currently own?

5 How many of them are drive-able?

3 What got you into cars in the first place?

When I was a wee lad a close family friend, Greg Armstrong had a shop in Costa Mesa (Historic Race Engineering). Too often I would visit the shop and stand in the back next to his 65 Alfa Stepnose race car project. Taking in all the details. Well, eventually they got tired of me loitering and handed me a broom. I think I worked there for about 16 years 'til I opened up my own shop.

Where did your love for American Classics come from?

I would guess it started at the 1997 TustinThunder vintage races held at the Tustin airbase which was just a few towns over from where I lived. I had a Datsun 510 at the time so I definitely went to check out the B Sedan group. Also a friend of the shop was there running his Shelby GT 350. I think I happened to be standing next to it when he fired it up I could feel it in my chest. I ran to the grandstands to watch him run and discovered that a small block Ford at 8500 RPM sounds fucking incredible.

What was your first car?

1989 Honda Civic Si Hatch.

What the most embarrassing car you picked up a date in?

1989 Honda Civic Si Hatch.

How did the date go?

I was actually the designated driver for some friends of mine who were on a date. I think it went well. She ended up marrying me though.

What’s the worst car you’ve owned?

1994 Plymouth Acclaim.

How would you describe the current IG car culture in general?

Depends where you look and who you follow. There are some who build cars that make me want to barf and others who seem to care enough to get all the details right. I will say that Instagram has ruined Porsches for me. Total fucking overload. There are cars other than Porsches.

How do you feel about people like Benjamin Chen who seem to have a penchant for destroying hyper cars?

Hang on, let me google Benjamin Chen. Yeah I have no interest in hyper cars or what billionaire playboys do in them.

What is the one of the most underrated cars in your opinion?

DeKon Monza.

Flip side of the last question... What’s one of the most overrated cars?

911.

Electric: Love or hate?

There is no denying that it’s the future and the performance of an electric car can be very impressive. That being said, it does not interest nor excite me in the least.

How is quarantine af fecting your car scene?

My wife is not working so all I do is work on cars. That’s my scene.

RACING Do you race? Why or why not?

No. I would love to race. I did have an SCCA ITC 510 race car for a spell. I never got it on the track. I only have myself to blame I suppose. I spent much of my younger years amassing project cars that were doomed from the start. I didn’t have the focus or budget to finish any of them. If I had spent 1/3 of the money and time I wasted on all those cars on vintage racing I could have done it.

Are you fast? (If YES, how do you know? If NO, why not?)

I think I can drive. We'll find out at the next Hypertrash open track day.

What's the best car you've ever owned?

1970 AMC Javelin Mark Donohue.

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How would you describe the current LA car culture specif ically?

I barely get out of Orange County with any of my own cars. I get invited on quite a few drives. I have yet to attend any. I spend quite a lot of time prepping other people’s cars so they can go have fun on the twisty’s. Don’t be like me.

Fastest you've ever driven on public roads?

155 on surface streets in a 1994 Jaguar XJ220.

Who’s your favorite racing driver of all time and why?

Jackie Stewart. I really like his style both as a driver and as a person.

He was super smooth. Not the most exciting way to drive for the spectators but smooth is fast. He also pissed off a lot of people with his demand for driver safety and did it whilst winning championships. I’m sure losing a few of your good friends every season gets old.

If you had a time machine and could go to one race, any year, what would it be?

1973 Monaco GP. Last time to see Jackie race at Monaco. The after parties would’ve been legendary.

If you could assemble a Motorsport team from any era, what discipline, cars and drivers would you choose?

Touring car racing. Escorts and Capris. Mark Donohue, Jacky Ickx, Allan Moffat, John Fitzpatrick, Yvette Fontaine.

If you could drive one track in the world, which one and why?

I’d like to give Nurburgring a try but since Riverside is long gone and I never got to see it let alone drive it. I’ll say Riverside. Some amazing shit went down at Riverside from the beginnings of Shelby American to the glory days of Trans Am and Can Am. There are obviously many European tracks with more history but most of them still exist.

Your best drive?

My wife had just been admitted to the hospital for bed rest when I got a phone call from my mother in law that she had complications and they needed to get my son out immediately, five weeks early.

I got from 32nd St. in Newport Beach to Bear St. at South Coast Plaza area to drop my 4 year old off and back to HOAG Hospital in Newport in what must have been under 12 minutes. I was possessed by Fangio! I made it with seconds to spare.

Should ACH (Angeles Crest Hwy) host a staged rally race?

Sounds good to me!

Worst crash? (if you're comfortable talking about it) I’ve been pretty lucky just a few fender benders.

LAST QUESTIONS Which car made you bleed the most and how?

Hit my head on an open Lamborghini Diablo door. Almost knocked me out. Probably should have had stitches but glued it with some crazy glue type liquid bandage stuff.

Anything we missed?

What did I win?

Thanks Jean, you win a free magazine and sticker. -HT

@windsorandkent

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ANTHONY H O P E E V E R Y W H E R E HYPERTRASH INTERVIEW WITH ANTHONY HOPE WORDS PHOTOS

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NATHANAEL NAPOLITANO ANTHONY HOPE



PHOTO: WARD ROBINSON

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B

orn in the U.K. in the mid-seventies—Anthony Hope grew up in the heydey of sneakers—BMX bikes, and classic 1980s Group-B rally racing. The sounds and colors of that era made their mark and this influences his design aesthetic and the direction of his work to this day.

Anthony started his career as a graphic T-shirt designer. As a teenager—after getting a degree in product design—he started his professional career as an industrial designer working on products from toothbrushes to fire extinguishers while developing a BMX clothing brand in London. He got picked up by Adidas in 1999 to design footwear in Germany and has worked for the top brass of footwear companies.

In 2009 he moved to Los Angeles and started his own design firm— ERNST Everything. Over the last ten years he has had some of the biggest names in brands as clients. We had a chance to get him on the phone and talk cars, cool, and crashing. ___________________________________________________

HYPERTRASH: Anthony! How you doing?

Right… It’s crazy amounts of work.

ANTHONY HOPE: I’m all right thank you. Sorry my phone’s a bit rubbish in my house—it never connects.

Well let’s get started then—of ficially and on the record.

We like to start of f with the tough questions around here.

To begin with, what is your favorite color?

I have the same problem with my phone most of the time, so I get it.

Yeah. It makes you wonder what year you’re really living in. I had a better working phone in ’98 than I do now. My Nokia banana phone was crystal clear…

Oh man, really? This might take a minute… In what context? Like you have to live with it forever?

You know… Like it grabs you by the pants when you see it or feel it?

Yeah take us back to the Motorola brick of the 80s! So just to give you a little background on this thins... It’s mostly focused on people and their cars but we’re injecting other things here and there, some culture stuf f, art, a bit of design, photography, maybe some film and music.

I think like a red, usually a bright red. Like PANTONE 186c, not to be too specific.

Right, so you are kind of bringing it all back, like the old zines.

Left-handed.

Yeah exactly like a counterculture kind of punk zine feel to it. It’s not so polished like some of these other more established high-end car magazines.

Are you ambidextrous at all?

The way cars are portrayed to us, in mass media is very formulaic. I used to like a bit of Petrolicious, but even those videos lose intrigue pretty quickly.

Yeah. I mean they’re publishing video every week, so imagine the content production you need for that. They’ve just got to be busting ass out there filming everything.

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Yeah after looking at your work that makes sense. Are you left-handed or right-handed?

For sports, yes. I’ll bat right handed and play tennis left-handed, and for driving you know growing up in England and driving on the continent, left-hand and right-hand driving. I think all left-handed people are like that though, because everything in the world is right-handed… Scissors, what an utter pain in the ass (laughing). And the endless smudging when writing… You gotta have the hook.

Can you draw well right-handed?

RESURRECTION



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I mean, I can probably draw better than 90 percent of right-handed people, I don’t mean to brag—but yeah.

You were you born in the 70s?

'75. Slap in the middle.

Where did you grow up?

Sort of all over the place. England, South London mostly, my dad was in the army, so we used to move around every three years, then three years in Australia.

When did you move to the States?

When I was 27 or 28, I think, early 2000s.

How did you view American culture growing up?

I always was interested by it, because it was so different from the U.K., everything was huge, I grew up watching the A-Team, Dukes of Hazard, Planet of the Apes, Knight Rider, Fall Guy—which influenced me a lot. That whole era of cars and trucks, logos, branding, colors, all the lifted GM and Ford trucks. It was another world to us in the U.K. It sounds like you grew up pretty heavily into cars then…

Yes. I was always spotting cars in London, magazines, Top Gear, Fifth Gear, and BMX as well. Like a lot of BMX magazines, BMX racing. I loved BMX racing.

So, you are a fan of early BMX but did you race?

No. There really wasn’t racing where I grew up and we were always moving so my parents didn’t agree with us having BMX bikes. It’s probably why I’ve damaged myself so much as an adult because I’ve been doing everything I wanted to do when I was a child, but as an adult.

I have that same exact problem! What was the hottest car for you growing up during that time period?

Oh man… Probably a Mk1 Escort, a Mexico or RS2000… or Holden Ute, when living in Australia, Mad Max era…

Really?!

Yeah, My brother influenced me a lot. He’s older and knew a lot more about cars than me when we were younger. In the U.K. there was a lot of motorsport on television. You either watch football— you guys call it soccer—or you watch motorsport, or cricket.

So you were down the for the 80’s Euro hot hatch rally cars?

Yeah that was the culture. It was affordable fun. Those smaller cars were more popular in Europe before it became hyper cars and all 72



that nonsense.

Then what was the hottest unobtainable supercar that you would see either on TV, in movies, or around town that people would aspire to own?

I remember I had a poster of a white Countach on my wall with a really bad body kit on it (laughs). All the flairs… I think it was the second or third generation. All Miami Vice’d out with everything on it. I think that was my unobtainium car. And the early Countach still is.

Let me bounce back to BMX really quick because I’ve been looking at some or your stuf f —that’s obviously a reoccurring theme for you and your design. So, if you had to pick between Huf fy, Mongoose, GT or Redline, which you have?

Aw man! It depends… If it was old school probably Mongoose, Super Goose, something like that. But if you get more new school then GT—but I wouldn’t buy a modern GT at all though. In the 90s I had a GT Box Series race bike. Was Schwinn on your list as well?

It wasn’t but do you want to throw it up there?

Yes, in the 90’s the Foster brothers were riding Schwinn race bikes, the ENF, full aluminum frame with machined rear yolks. That was my dream frame, proper form follows function, Kastan as well. I ended up finding a used Schwinn ENF in the UK, built it with S&M pitch forks, slam bars, King headset, Profiles, Crupi’s, the works…

Yeah see, I didn’t even consider Schwinn with BMX because I dropped out of the BMX scene in the late 80s when I went all-in with skateboarding. That whole post-80s BMX era is unknown to me.

Yeah, I loved BMX, but it was sort of unattainable to me because like I said, we always moved and we didn’t have the media that we have now. I didn't have a BMX bike or money for magazines. So, in the 90s I lived out my BMX dreams, when no one was into it!

Everyone would be like, “Why are you riding that kid’s bike?”

In the 90s you must have been pushing 20?

Yeah, I was 15/16 early 90s and that was always the question!

Because in the States, BMX people get it. But in the U.K., it was like “What is that?”

I used to go to police auctions with my mum, she used to buy and sell antiques and furniture for her flat. I could buy BMX bikes for nothing because nobody wanted them, they weren’t cool, everyone wanted mountain bikes. I would buy BMX’s that were recovered stolen that no one would claim. I remember buying a SuperGoose for three pounds (GBP) plus auction fees which was a few pounds.

A Skyway TA with Tuff 2’s for under five pounds (GBP). I used to clean them, tune them up, ride them, and then sell them in the

back of the local paper.

In that era then would you go for mags or spokes?

I preferred spokes. I remember at school people having mags—but yeah—when I started building bikes Skyway Tuff 2 hubs would blow out too quick. But once I learned about Profile hubs it was all about, “How on earth can I afford those?”

Did you ever do freestyle?

I mean, I would ride street. And when I say, “I would ride street”— what I mean is I would really just hurt myself more than do anything spectacular. Long manuals were my party trick!

Yeah that sounds just like me on a skateboard!

Some of my friends were skating. I mostly rode on my own and there were like two or three of us that did it, you know? It was pretty low key. There weren’t many skateparks we could get to easily. So we just went out and built our own jumps and found dirt jump spots. When I was a bike messenger, I remember putting a big ring on the front of my GT Box Series, clipping in and riding for a couple days on my 20-inch to see if I could do it. It was super fun but exhausting.

You were a bike messenger?

Yeah for about two or three years on and off. I did it for a summer job.

Where?

In London.

When I was living in Boston for a couple years in the early 2000s all my friends who were in bands were bike messengers as their main employment. So we got all wrapped up in the whole fixed gear scene.

Yeah, so that was a whole other thing. I had a GT Zaskar, P2 rigid forks and front brake and super skinny bars.

So being into BMX and living in Australia for a bit, you have to pick between the films RAD or BMX Bandits.

I mean I’m gonna say BMX Bandits every time…

Oh my god, why?

Because I was there! There was a summer we went to Manly Beach and that’s when BMX was mass “hot”! Right then. It was just one of those things, we were there, so we associated with that moment of that culture.

It’s definitely a regional thing, right? So then for road bike films do you pick American Flyers or Breaking Away?

I’ve only seen Breaking Away, I’ll have to check out American Flyers.

Fair enough, I mean that is the most popular one anyway.

Let’s spend some time talking about your work, and ERNST. Tell us little bit about that, what you do, how it started…

Ernst has been going properly for over 10 years now. I originally started it when I lived in Germany working for Adidas as a footwear designer in 2001. I freelanced as an illustrator for Adidas too, so had to set up an entity.

Where does the name ERNST come from?

ERNST is the German word for serious (it was also the name of my friends childhood teddy bear). It was called the Serious Project and that’s where the name came from. After working at Nike for about five years in Innovation, I really came to a point where I had learned everything I wanted to learn at Nike, I didn’t want to be in the Oregon rain anymore either… I moved to Los Angeles and started ERNST Everything.

And what’s the idea behind it?

ERNST Everything came from being pigeonholed as a footwear designer. I mean I love trainers (sneakers) and I love designing footwear, but there was so much more that I wanted to work on. My business partner comes from an automotive design background and we both really just wanted to broaden our creative horizons.

Hence the Everything included in our name.

The issue we came across was, we were a creative piece of the puzzle. We had a vision of becoming more holistic and to be able to create products for clients from start to finish with creative vision and integrity throughout everything in the creative process. To try and help brands improve design and create better products and experiences.

We saw a gap. The insight from designing in house for brands was—designers were great at designing—but they didn’t seem to understand cultural relevance or see the big picture. There was an element missing for me, designers kept designing in a vacuum. I feel, we as a team have a broad cultural understanding and knowledge of how to integrate that into design too.

Being able to show brands how to make their products, not only better from a performance aspect, but also to make their products more culturally relevant for the audience or the consumer. Also innovation—I went to Nike to learn about innovation and creating new ideas and technologies, as I thought it was this McDonald’s secret sauce kind of thing.

What I learned was—it was all about the dedication of time and resources into creating new ideas. If you dedicate enough time to one thing and you carry on dedicating time to it, there’s gonna 

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be a time when you stagnate. However, after ruminating on the idea, different perspectives, advancements in technology, or shifts in manufacturing processes, make the impossible—possible. And innovation moves forward.

So, for our clients we help them incubate innovation and come up with a long-term plan.

This is something we see now with our government, don’t we?

There seems to be a severe lack of planning and it’s very short sighted and it’s all about what’s happening next season. Whereas we try and steer more towards asking what’s their goal in five or ten years?

What do you really want to be and how is it sustainable? How do we grow towards that? How do we create an innovation plan and a product plan towards that goal? So, we guide our clients through a creative and functional process.

You referenced how the government f unctions now where it’s more of a reactionary approach to whatever situation arises. As opposed to what you’re describing which is more of a program plan.

Right. And brands always wonder why they falter and why they’re not doing so well and it’s because they’re always copying or mimicking instead of being themselves. Instead of asking themselves, “What are we good at and how did we get here?”

Everybody’s identity is easily classifiable. It’s like you said there’s maybe a dozen archetypes of the same person with slight variation.

I mean we all have uniforms, right? I’m interested in prisons and their social structure. It’s all about uniforms, prisoners are dressed and colored according to the nature of their crimes. It’s a reflection of our society, but on a micro scale.

So creatively the research for your designs and campaigns is mixed with clients’ needs but also with what you’re exposed to?

I mean, we’ve done it for so long, we know what’s coming. We see the patterns, when it flips. It’s same with stockbrokers or surfers, market peaks and waves, You sit and watch and you see the patterns. It’s all relative, like anything you study deeply. You just get really good at it.

It goes beyond design. It’s more about psychology and really understanding people and what drives them. Why they like to wear certain things, what makes them feel good, what they associate with, what they aspire to, and sneakers—they’re attainable to everyone. If you don’t have a lot of money, you can basically show who you are and that you know what’s up, with your sneakers.

We find many brands applying the same logic, the same business model, or the same creative plan from their past success to solve current problems. The marketplace is constantly evolving, and faster than ever. So all the more reason to have a clear, concise, innovative, creative, product message for their brand.

As simple or as brash as they might be. I think that’s what I love about the sneaker world too—especially growing up. You know?

I might not be able to afford expensive clothes or anything, but I can find myself some fresh sneakers somewhere. And they don’t even have to be expensive. Fifty-five dollar white-white Reeboks!

So good.

When talking about identity and planning for the f uture with a client, how do you research the designs and the campaign then apply that to whatever they identify as?

Yeah, I’ve been wearing Vans Eras since like the early 80’s.

Some things are a f undamental part of your identity, if a shoe can be an identity?

Initially its about sitting with clients discussing and setting goals, aspirations, what they want to achieve financially, creatively and how to find that balance of creativity and financial goals.

I think so, yeah. And the nice thing about Eras is it’s an honest shoe. It does what it says on the box.

Depending on the clients we will do deep dive research which involves immersing ourselves into an activity or product zone that we are trying to solve a problem for. Also researching the brands heritage—pinpointing their core competencies and their historical success and failures. From there creating a design strategy aesthetically and functionally to then create the future creative direction, design direction and business roadmaps. Our real value is our knowledge of how to digest all this information, see the patterns and then formulate the big picture business idea and the design landscape.

There is a lot of mimicking or me too products and there is a large amount of reactionary products. Every product manager is glued to Hypebeast™ and we now have so much sameness, that people are dressing so predictably and you can categorize LA—for examples in about twelve groups of looks—which makes me sad.

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Getting back to patterns, what recurring themes in art and design that you find yourself returning to?

Just a lot of cultural stuff like BMX always comes back around, skateboarding is always in the mix. I was never a skater but in the U.S. it’s always relevant it seems.

Do you think it’s because of the attitudes in skateboarding?

Or just the general image of it?

I think the image. As now being a skater is a little bit like being a jock. You’re a skateboarder, right? It’s become a category. You are now officially a category as much as you despise the fact.

It’s not a punk and subversive as it once was…

The fact that there are Skate Moms and Skate Coaches now for kids is a little bit nuts.

A sample of works from the ERNST 75 Everything portfolio.

I think Nyjah is a perfect example of that right? Someone you’ve worked with before. He’s become the representation of approachable athletic skating. Sponsored by Monster Energy, af fluent Laguna kid skating in LuLu Lemon, the Orange County moms can relate.

Ah man that’s such a funny one because I just watched one of his videos and I forwarded it to a bunch of skater friends, and I know how much they despise him because he’s viewed as a kook. He did this rail where he goes around a corner, a three-kink rail or whatever its called and takes it around this bend and you’re like “Dude, you are a freak!” The control was insane. And my friends still hate on him. I’m not really into his aesthetic, but his athletic abilities are pretty bananas, Its almost super human…

They love to hate on him but he rips, and the best always get hated on. Same with how Tony Hawk was viewed at his peak.

I find that so amusing. I enjoy what skaters do and I used to design for Sole Tech, so Etnies, Es', Emerica. I was in the middle of it [skateboarding]. It’s so funny to watch from the inside, even when skaters are excelling in the sport they’re just like “Naw dude, soand-so is a kook.”

There’s no doubt he’s amazing on a skateboard. But an easy target. I think it’s because at that basic level there’s a locals only, punk rock mentality. That better-than-you attitude. It is NOT a team sport.

Yeah, it’s like the Huntington Beach thing…

Ha-ha yeah, I’m from Huntington and that’s totally it.

I get it. I remember going to Sheep Hills to ride BMX when I first moved to the States.

Oh no shit! I used to go there too. Yeah right of f Brookhurst and Hamilton on the border of Huntington Beach and Costa Mesa.

Yeah! I lived on Superior Avenue and I remember going to Sheep and just being told “Get the fuck out of here!” And I’m like “What? Nah man I read about this shit in magazines and I traveled across the world and I now design BMX shoes for Etnies and just want to ride these dirt jumps…” and they’re like “Naw dude, get the fuck out of here. It’s locals only.” And I’m like “Whaaat? But I just live right up there.”

Yeah, like “I live in this city now bro. This is my zip code!”

Yeah. Naw… Not happening.

Who haven’t you worked with yet that you would really like to work with?

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It’s funny you ask that because I just looked at our client list and I thought to myself, “I think I’ve worked with everyone I’ve wanted to work with.”

Really?

Yeah because I mean in the beginning, I’ve wanted to do a bunch of snowboarding stuff so I worked with Burton, Thirty-Two, worked with a bunch of amazing people. I’ve worked for Nike, Adidas. I dodged the bullet with Kanye West.

I got to work with Brooklyn Machine works and do a collaboration on a bike, got to work with Evil Bikes. Action sports (I hate that terminology) has always been our focus. We’ve done a lot with mountain biking, worked with Giro, Crank Bros, Fox, 510, rock climbing boots for North Face. We’ve done a bunch of technical ski apparel too. So maybe a car company. What we’re looking at now is the automotive space. Since I’ve been injured, I bought this electric bike, and e-bikes just look rubbish right now. I mean they work really well, and the function is great, but I’d love to bring more cultural relevance and make bikes that are actually cool.

Bikes that people want to ride and aren’t embarrassed to ride. And it’s the same with cars too…

There are not many people out there designing decent looking cars. You go out and buy a Honda Civic and it looks like Batman’s Christmas tree. And any decent car, like that Honda electric car that is not coming to the U.S. market. It looks like its based on that Mark Newson car [Ford 012C] that he did in like 1998. The only thing I think that’s super cool right now is that RIVIAN that our friend Rob Williams designed, really cool electric pickup truck and SUV. I hope they do well. Biomimicry is something I’d like to work on and partner with someone like Maharishi in London.

It sounds like a theme that you’re always going for is f unction over fashion.

Exactly and I think that’s what people forget. When you look at where a lot of fashion comes from, it comes from function… Look at how military is always in fashion. Because its based on form follows function.

Anthony boosting a double set in Big Bear, CA.

I mean there’s a reason why a lot of drug dealers in the 80s in New York wore North Face jackets, because it was fucking cold and that down jacket was super durable, it was semi waterproof, it was expensive and it looked fresh too with a gold chain and some Jordan’s. It checked all the boxes. And I think people forget to look back through history, to see why these things became culturally relevant and usually it’s for a functional reason. Or there was something that happened in that time that made it relevant. So, I think ERNST is really good at determining why and how, and what is next for our clients. There are great stories that are forgotten. (continued on page 80)



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Current garage inhabitants: 1996 Honda Gorilla, 2015 Ducait 821, and 1966 Porsche 911.

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Those are all really good points. I think the backstories are what make it interesting. Since cars are sort of the main focus of this magazine, I think we should transition a little and spend just a few minutes there. What’s your favorite car that you’ve ever owned?

Oh man… I don’t really want to say it (laughs).

What would a favorite car be that you can’t afford?

Oh man! A new one or…?

Yeah whatever, like an F40, just anything you think you can’t afford.

See I can’t have the fast cars like the F40 because I’ll get in serious trouble….

Well, now you have to say it.

Now I’m showing my age. You mean that I’ve owned?

Yes.

We are going to talk about that soon. That’s a little bit down the list.

Right now number one is my LR4.

Ha-ha! To be honest I’m super into—and I know it’s embarrassing—the new Vantage. The new Aston Martin Vantage.

No way!

I can’t fault you on that though…

Yeah, 2011 LR4. The do-everything car.

I’ve sat by it in traffic and listened to that exhaust and I’m like, “Oh my god I think I love that car!”

That’s incredible! I never would have guessed that. People hate on Land Rovers. I have a ’98 Disco 1 that I drive back and forth to Seattle almost daily.

That exhaust note sounds like no other.

And how reliable was that car for you?

There’s still the Black Series CLK, 2008. I love the look of those, that DTM look but it’s not a doable car though. A GT3 with no wing on it or just the touring is dreamy. Or an M2 right now with eighteen-inch wheels and some fat rubber, QUATTRO is up there.

It’s been amazing. The control arms were a thing but It’s been a great car. I bought it used. It goes off road like a trooper.

Since you brought up the GT3, do you go for the PDK or the manual?

Of course.

With my feet in thier current state I go PDK. My friend has one and he let me drive it a lot and it was a 2015 PDK and I thought I’d hate it… It’s an amazing car. I mean I took it to the supermarket on occasion, before a canyon drive. And I’d have my groceries in the front and just hope that the eggs didn't splatter. I mean that car…

Unreal how fast you could go. Unreal. The pace. If I ever had to do a cross country trip and had to get to New York in—whatever— thirty hours? That is my car of choice.

I used to have an ’03 D2 with an ARB, Old Man Emu lift. Loved that thing! Except the seat posture sucked.

I remember going mountain biking—two downhill bikes on the back rack—we just took a detour and went up this hill and it was a serious grade, the racks were hitting the ground. We had nowhere to turn around, so I ended up reversing back down the same thing I had driven up. And it was amazing. It went just as well going backwards as it did forwards. I used to take it to Big Bear a lot with my bike, and through the twisty’s. It was amazing.

I used to love the roads up there. The LR4 would four-wheel slide and the back rear would lift too, proper touring car style (laughs).

It handles like a car! I can go out to dinner in Beverly Hills. Ride downhill in Temecula. It does everything and cops leave me alone in that LR4.

I had a follow-up question to that asking what your favorite daily driver would be, but I guess you already answered it.

I mean I would prefer a smaller car as a daily. For example, a Williams Clio Mark 1 or Mark 2. I might have to wear sunglasses, so I didn’t have to see the interior. There’s a European side of me that loves small hot hatches. The Alpine is pretty cool for a new car…

Or a Fiat Panda 4x4.

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Perfect. Then on the vintage side of things do you go Lancia or Alfa?

Yeah a Lancia Delta or a Stratus. That’s really where it’s at. I mean I’d be a dead man in a Stratus. But the modern one with the Ferrari motor in it… That’s a pretty car. They did a really nice job on that.

Kind of like the way they just did the G-Wagon really well. I’m just looking at Land Rover and thinking, “Why didn’t you guys just do that to the Defender?”

Exactly. The new Defender—I don’t know that the hell they were doing there. Why did you turn into a KIA? You could have just left it as a Land Rover instead. You have the technology.

Right! It's an X-Terra in like ’91 or something. You can match the lights almost identically. The front end designs between the two

are really close.

What about Monster or Gorilla or KTM or Juice Bike?

Oh man…

We ask the toughest questions around here!

You know what—I have a love for the Gorilla. I’ve always loved monkey bikes—ever since I saw a Honda Gorilla, I’ve always wanted one. In a perfect world I would have a Gorilla and I’d bore the motor out to like a 90cc and maybe put some better springs and brakes on it.

That sounds perfect.

To me that’s all you need you know? You don’t need excess. The other things are just too much sometimes … I left my bike for like a year and half. It started fourth go. Didn’t do anything to it.

Trying to get a Ducati or that KTM to start… In your dreams.

Right! He had an exhaust pipe and I had a mud guard in my hand and were in the middle of nowhere in the English countryside you know? On a lovely summers evening. Eventually someone did pull over and we called the RAC which is like AAA. They came in an hour, I went and got some Fish and Chips, you know as you do.

We sat there on the roads edge. And these lovely guys pulled us out and gave us a bag of zip ties and we zip tied the car back together, because it’s a Caterham. There were some dents in the bodywork but generally it was fine. Then we went to the pub where we stayed that night. In the morning when the land lady gave us breakfast, she also gave us a bucket of hot water and said, “Oh lads your car looks dirty, what happened to you?” It was just covered in mud from the ditch. We explained our little off, cleaned the car, and pulled all the roots and reeds out of it. Then we continued on and did that track day at Cadwell Park, which was amazing! What a track—perfect in the Caterham—and then we drove home!

And it made it all the way back?

It made it all the way back. It was a good 200-mile journey.

No no… It’s all got to come apart. You have to take the whole thing apart.

I’ve heard about you being fast on Angeles Crest Highway, but what happened on your last trip up there?

Exactly. And the Honda just goes. You can’t fault them. It’s unreal.

And the way it was designed, I think just all comes back to BMX where I love simplicity. That’s what I really loved about BMX— the minimalism—what can I take off? And then the same for the Gorilla. What do I really need? Something that just gets me from A to B and I have a lot of fun—with a smile on my face. That’s the same with my cars. I think now with my accident that’s why the Land Rover is good. Actually, even before that, the Land Rover was good.

The last trip. Yeah…

Can you describe what happened when you were driving with your brother and you guys ended up in a ditch somewhere.

The RS America, named Snoopy. I had driven my loop which was Big Tujunga—Lower Tujunga and I was on my way out. It was so much fun—what a drive. I thought that I should go out through the other way and get a little bit more driving in. So I went back up. I got about halfway up and I stopped. The car was smoking, the tires were done, there’s a lot of oil leaking, suspension was a little bit high, so the car was sliding a lot. At that point I decided to just drive home. I wasn’t going fast and it was the last corner on Lower Tujunga before you join the main road. It was December and sunny, but it was cold and there are those overhangs of mountain causing patches of shaded road. I must have just hit black ice or standing water or something slick. The back end went. That last corner the radius keeps going it’s a long radius corner and I know it. I basically got in a skid. My rear end came out and I was like,"I’m going to put it in a spin." My millisecond thought was, " I’m going to put it in a spin—I’m gonna hit the wall—there’s not enough room and I’m going to bounce off and go off the edge. My only way out of this is to hold the skid."

How do you know about that one?

We have our sources…

My brother had a Caterham in the U.K., and I had one in the U.S..

We were going to a track day up in Caldwell Park, from London.

On the way, there was this long left had sweeper. I knew we were going too fast—he doesn’t seem to think we were going too fast— we went around this left hander and the right front and right rear were in the grass and we just went off because it was slick. We basically went into a ten-foot ditch full of reeds. Luckily we fell straight in it and there wasn’t a lot of water, but it came up to our footwell and we just rode it out. We just sat there and looked at each and were like, “Fuck me, that was crazy!” And the messed up thing was when we got out, you couldn’t see the car. We were trying to wave cars down and people just though we were just two crazy people covered in mud in the middle of nowhere.

They thought you were just two crazy hitchhikers.

You want to talk about that?

Yeah… It was a Tuesday morning. I went to the office and remember just seeing the amount of work I had to do, and I was like, “I’m going for a drive” to chill out.

And what were you driving?

So I came off the throttle gently and started slowing down the skid, it was like 1…2…3… and the car was really leveling out. That road has got a camber on it and the surface is uneven and my front tires were done. Then the right rear caught grip and just sent me 

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Anthony being extricated from the wreckage and hoisted onto Air Rescue 5 with LASD SEB Tactical Medic.

Photo: SEBLASD 12/11/18 with quote, "Vehicle 200' over the side and on fire, Angeles Forest Hwy/Big Tujunga Cyn. LASD Air Rescue 5 inserts LASD SEB Tactical Medics to rescue driver. Medics and driver hoisted out of canyon by Air 5 and airlifted to Trauma Center. Saving lives priority 1!"

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Red Zone: Location of Big Tujunga Canyon Road where Anthony lost control of Snoopy and plummeted 200 feet down a shear cliff into the valley below.

completely sideways. Like it sent me literally at a right angle, so I was facing the edge and I was still doing maybe forty miles an hour and had a roads width. One lane, a bit of gravel, bit of grass and then the edge and I was facing it. If I turn to the right now, I’m gonna skid and I’m gonna flip because that grass edge is gonna catch the wheel and flip me sideways and I’m gonna roll off whatever is on the other side. So, I punched it…

All I learned from jumping mountain bikes, BMX, motocross bikes was—whenever you’re in doubt—you always need a little bit more momentum. You can always scrub it somewhere. I thought, “I’ll be fucked if I’m going off this as a passenger.” It all goes through your head in like milliseconds. So I punched it and I remember the noise as it hit the grass edge. It was probably only about four foot high and it just went “Raaaaawr”! It was like when you’re on a roller coaster and you’re at the top and you’re going over that edge you and go “Oh fuck” and your stomach drops. It was that—only deeper like “Ohhhhh Fuuuuuck.”

I went over the edge. It was still at an angle so I was veering to the right a little bit. I was in the air and on the gas—I stayed on the wheel and thinking, “Fuck this.” In all the bike things I’ve had where I didn’t crash on jumps— I never give up in the air. I learned this in Whistler where I’d been caught in a bunch of cross winds doing huge doubles, like forty or fifty-foot doubles on crab apple hits and I’d be in the air and blown off course. I remember starting to pedal in the air like, “I’ve got this! I’ve got this!” And then dropping my front end with my front brake and I ride out of it. I was like, “No way it’s all in my head." And I’ve done that numerous times when I’ve overcooked a jump—I just keep pushing. And here I used that same logic—kept in it—steered towards where I wanted to go. I hit once with the rear end. And it was like a Disney movie when they fall off a cliff… I can equate it to Jurassic Park when the dude goes off the edge of a cliff and goes through the jungle really quick. It’s kind of like that except imagine the engine noise rev’ing out with the wheels loose. It was quiet—but loud.

So, I just aimed for the trees. That is all I remember doing. I remember my back going fuzzy after the first hit and then it was another hit and then another hit. I hit a tree and went up the tree and then it flipped the car on its roof. Then I’m upside down. I had a full roll cage and I would not be alive today if I didn’t have a full roll cage and a five-point harness. The harness wasn’t fully done up, but it was tight enough. Because that was the thing, I was done driving. I was driving home so I loosened my harnesses—that's how much I was done. I was going home. And that’s always the thing I say to people—it’s the last ten percent. You have to go a hundred and ten percent like running the hundred meters—you have to sprint through the finish and stay one hundred percent focused. That’s when you know you’re finished. And I didn’t even follow my own rules.

So long story short I’m upside down. I took five deep yoga breaths and I said to myself, “What are you gonna do?” I said, “Save myself.” And then you really find out who the fuck you are. I undid my harness and hit the roof of the car. I tried to get my legs out and realized I had no leg movement. Luckily with the roll cage I

used the bars to pull me out and I had just been to the gym, so my arms were pretty ready. If anyone ever asks you what’s the point of the RS webbing loops, they’re for when you’re grabbing for your passenger door when you can’t use your legs and you swing for it and you grab it first time. And that loop is out and it pops the door open.

The door popped open from the pressure of the cage on the frame, it had been compressed. I could have gone through the front window because it was out, but I didn’t think I could get through the dense shrubs. The passenger side was high so I pulled myself up and there was a tree pinning the door so I squeezed through the gap. I had a fire extinguisher—the car was on fire—I tried to put it out but it was an oil fire and I had water and the canister wasn’t big enough. But the fire ended up saving my life because that’s what people saw. I dropped to the ground from the car and realized from the waist down I didn’t have much feeling and from the knees down I had no control. So, I dragged myself away from the car. I want to draw you the image of it because I remember I was in my racing shoes and was looking back from about fifty feet away and thinking, how the fuck has this happened?

Tuesday, 11:24 in the morning and I’m sitting at the bottom of this ravine thinking how am I alive since I literally had just done a straight drop of a cliff.

How long was the airtime and how far down was the drop to the bottom?

200 feet. I want to say the airtime was like maybe four or five-seconds.

You just jumped it.

The cop that interviewed me in the hospital said, “You full on Dukes of Hazarded that one.“ He told me I had probably saved my life because there’s basically a five percent survival rate of people that go off there—and most of those who do survive are paralyzed.

After I got out of the car, I belted my legs together and crawled through bushes and undergrowth. My worst cut was from just crawling. In my car I left my phone, my wallet, my glasses, everything. I had a bunch of money from work and checks to cash that day. I looked at it and thought if I go back down in there I might not come out. Is it worth it for all that stuff? And that was the thing, who are you and what are you gonna do? How are you going to get out of here? It really kicks in you know. Your adrenaline kicks in and you you’ve got like 10-15 minutes of adrenaline and you’re like, “Right I gotta keep it cooking before I go into shock.”

I ended up crawling out of the ravine on the other side because it was a dirt hill and I thought I could get to a big boulder… What I thought was gonna happen was after the car caught fire, then the fuel cell would catch fire, then the forest was going to catch fire because it was super dry and there had been a bunch or forest fires recently.



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Anthony onboard Air Rescue 5 in C-spine being stabilized by LASD SEB Tactical Medics en route to Huntington Memorial Hospital in Pasadena, CA.

Yeah December—that’s right in the middle of fire season in SoCal. Yeah, I thought I was basically going to have to dig myself a hole.

That’s when all my dad’s army logic comes in you know? I was gonna have to dig myself a hole and get under one of these rocks to avoid suffocation. Then I was looking at the cliff and thinking, at what point do I start climbing? And then lucky for me the fire started to really take off. It was a healthy fire. It was quite poetic to see my pretty RS America upside down and engulfed in flames.

Its a pretty image in my mind. It saved me… Snoopy was the best.

I saw a car at the cliffs edge and I just started shouting repeatedly, “Help!” really loud then left a gap and shouted, “Help! Help!” again and kept repeating that. There was a guy looking around for where the sound was coming from and he kept looking so I just kept on, “Help! Help!” Then he saw me and was like, “What the fuck are you doing down there man?” He didn’t know what had happened—he just saw the forest fire and the car was hidden from his view, he though I was just some dude laying down in the dirt.

My empathy now for people with disabilities is massive because this is some dark shit to live with. You really dig deep and find out what you’re made of and whether you’re going to pass or fail. It’s made me so humble.

Have they told you how long your recovery will take or what your recovery will look like?

I think what you got to remember here is the surgeon is only going to take you a certain part of the way. They’re gonna do sixty to seventy percent. A lot of it is just up to you. I mean I can’t afford the Red Bull athlete rehab which is like twenty grand a month or whatever. I realized my rehab with my insurance was just like lining up to die. They had said I was already overqualified for their in-house rehab because I could walk more than fifty feet with a walker. I mean what the fuck is that? So, I put my own little team together of people that I know and have been lucky enough to be in contact with and these people have saved my life and helped put me back together. My girlfriend and friends here have just been unreal with their love and support.

Yeah just having a quick nap…

Exactly. I said, “Hey I’ve had a car accident and that’s my car on fire and I need some help." So, he went for help since the cell phone signal sucks right there. Then luckily, three more guys turned up and came down they were like, “We don’t want to move you.” and I said, “Dude I’ve just crawled from down there to here. If I’m not paralyzed yet I’d prefer to be paralyzed than burn to death, so can you just carry me over there?” And they were lovely enough to do that. I still to this day don’t know who they are but I’d love to know and thank them.

After a bit the dudes of the mountain came and did their thing.

Air ambulance, the mountain rescue team. Those dudes are on point. I was so lucky. The magic hour. Forty-five minutes and I was in hospital. Super lucky. LA Special Tactical folks… Thank you! Thank you!

Did they take you to USC? No, I went right there in Pasadena. Huntington Memorial. I got super lucky. I waited there for two days for my back to stop swelling and it turns out that I completely compressed one vertebrae.

From the landing.

Yeah exactly. Somehow, I did not touch my spinal cord, On impact I hit my bum so hard it squashed my nerves, so part of it is the spine injury, but a lot of it is compression of nerves. The reason I can’t walk properly now is that the nerves have not all grown back yet but I’m getting it all back. I am so lucky. There was a point there were I thought I was fucked. Three months in bed where you literally can’t move. You can’t even poo. Now I can do everything on my own and it makes you so humble, you know?

It’s the little things. 

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Anthony's Porsche RS America, Snoopy, up on Angeles Crest Highway.

The charred remains of Snoopy after going Duke's of Hazard over a 200' cliff.



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PHOTO: HARRISON BOYCE 88



Well, we are glad that you’re still around with us. As you’re on the mend, how does that set you up for the f uture of ERNST and what are you working on next?

I think now I’m not afraid of anything. It’s like this pandemic, everyone is like, what’s going to happen? And I just can’t live like that. I think you just have to look at yourself and figure out what you want out of everything and create a plan towards that.

With ERNST I know we want to do ERNST WERKS (@ernstwerks) and do more automotive stuff, apparel, accessories. I’m actually working on a brand called Röhma (@rohmamotorsport) which is a racing shoe brand. I can’t really divulge what it’s going to be, but back in 2001 I used to work for Adidas Originals, and I worked on a lot of racing product. I helped redesign and relaunch the Monza’s from the archives and the Monaco’s and the stuff to accompany them. I want to go back to that because no one is making decent racing shoes right now that really fit well and look good, racing shoes where you don’t look like a muppet. No one is making good quality racing shoes that look good and you want to wear. The analogy that I use is the 100-meter track spike, the sprint spikes of racing shoes. When you look at Walter Röhrl’s feet dancing on those pedals of that Audi—its majestic. Or when you see Senna driving the NSX in his loafers…

Yeah, I just watched that video this morning!

Totally! Loafers and white socks and you’re just like dude… The best! It’s a dance you know? Like these are our dancing shoes. To me it’s missing. It’s just very broad brush strokes but again people are not getting the cultural nuances of why people really love this stuff. What is it that really connects? Think about your car, right?

The pedals are your sort of dance floor to understand or feel your car from your throttle control or braking control.

And the Caterham is a perfect example of that where I could only wear race shoes because the pedals are so close together.

That is your direct point of connection with the machine.

That’s where you plug in.

Exactly, and it makes me look at my accident and the shoes I was driving in, they were too soft. I should have had a stiffer shoe. 964 throttles are quite heavy. It’s a different kind of dance. It made me think about that. It made me get into those details. And yeah ok it might not be the most lucrative of businesses but it’s something that I truly love, and we found this beautiful factory in Portugal that’s willing to make these beautiful shoes for us. And hopefully the idea is to go and partner with some premium automotive brands of the world and put out some good product that’s not just fluff. It’s the same with ERNST WERKS too—the reason we’ve stumbled for so long. We don’t want to put out me too products.

It’s kind of like when you look at Porsche Design and you’re like, "What? Why?" Yeah, you’re an automotive company, focus on that.

Right. Like stop trying to be cool.

Tell us a little about your thoughts on the current LA car culture and IG facade.

Aw man there’s lots of tiers to it right? I personally think it’s sad because it’s a lot of people who don’t drive cars to be honest. Or maybe I’m too far the other way because then their like, "Well you’re an idiot because you just fell off a cliff." I go to a gym where there’s a lot of guys that just lease new 992’s. They’re beautiful cars but they don’t want to drive them. It’s too much of this ‘look at me’ culture and I find it quite sad. As much as we get bombarded by the Magnus Walkers of the world, I like that fact that he still goes and drives cars. Fundamentally to me it doesn’t matter what car you drive just as long as you’re driving something that you have fun driving. And I think all of this, “I’ve got the newest wheels and the biggest horsepower” it’s a waste of time. Some of the most fun cars are cheap Miatas.

Earlier when we were talking about art, I was going to ask you what you think about -isms and which ones you most identify with specific to art.

Yeah. So a Japanese and an English designer did a thing called Supernormal. Jasper Morrison and Naoto Fukasawa and I love that too where it’s all about simplicity, like if I say to you “spoon”—the shape you think of and when you touch and hold it, you have no complaints. It works. The same reason we were talking about the Vans Eras because there’s these staples in life that don’t go away.

There are all these supernormal things and that’s what I’m drawn to and I think that’s really what it is. We call it a reductionism— where you take everything away that you can, and you’re left with the most minimal elements. Did I bore you enough?

Ha-ha no that was way more than I expected. There’s this ongoing theme where it all loops back to simplicity and not trying to be something you’re not. That’s our approach and it sounds like that’s your approach to what you’re doing, and I think that’s why this is a good potential for collaboration.

I think this a great place to end. Incredible stories and again, we are glad you are still with us after your harrowing crash off Angeles Crest. Thank you so much for taking the time to talk with us and helping us do this thing. Really incredible.

Likewise, man. Thank you for thinking of me and to be honest— it’s helpful to help me realize what my business does sometimes, because I forget you know? (Laughs) We get caught up in the day to day… 3 WWW.ERNSTEVERYTHING.COM @ernsteverything @ernsteverywhere



[business] [pleasure]

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A LOS ANGELES PHOTOGRAPHER DESCRIBES HIS EXPERIENCES DOCUMENTING THE CIVIL UNREST, PROTESTS, AND DESTRUCTION OF A CITY TRIGGERED BY THE POLICE MURDER OF GEORGE FLOYD ON MAY 25, 2020.

WORDS + PHOTOS

MICHAEL MASSAS

I just moved to Los Angeles not even a year ago. I've always had a fascination with the 1992 LA riots and being surrounded by some of the same visuals you get from documentaries or raw footage from Youtube is absolutely surreal. Most people have never been in that type of environment. You react to everything going on around you and survival mode kicks in. All that action and danger will definitely give you an adrenaline rush and I think that's feeding most of the energy there. I was amazed to see how quickly a vehicle can become completely engulfed in flames and how the heat feels even at a fair distance from it.

As smoke fills the air, all you can smell is burning plastic, metal and rubber. The gunpowder from the rounds being shot off by police as well as fireworks being let off by the crowd. Even looted perfume being used to start some fires is very noticeable through it all. An entire block smells like wine as you walk by broken bottles on the sidewalk from a restaurant that was just looted. All this while wearing a face mask due to the Covid-19 pandemic—which seems to be completely forgotten.

It was wild to see virtually every single business for blocks being ransacked, complete chaos. Entire stores and galleries being wiped out in less than a minute on Fairfax. Yeezy’s and Jordan’s lying all over the street among empty shoe boxes and broken glass. Sirens blaring nonstop along with security and fire alarms from the stores being run through and set on fire. I watched as even a Metro bus had its fare box being smashed up to retrieve the money inside.



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It was quite a sight to see police being overrun and cars full of cops getting smashed up while they were still in them and attempting to flee the scene. A lot of running around for me to be able to cover what I was witnessing. Between trying to keep up with the aggressive crowd on the offense to ensuring my own safety, to walking from Fairfax Village to Beverly Hills and back and everything in between; my feet have been screaming for days. I love the action though and do what I can to be able to capture the images I'm lucky enough to catch.

Gladly, I was not hit by any bean bags or rubber bullets or tear gassed, but I came very close to it—one just barely missing my head and slamming into the store front behind me with great velocity. Seeing active military staging and patrolling in your city is something out of a movie.

While it may have a profound effect on some, I know it's all for intimidation and it's working as there's been nothing else here like what we saw and experienced the night of May 29 and day of May 30.

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PHOTO: NAPOLITANO

FILM REVIEW WORDS + iPHONE PHOTOS OF

NO MAN’S LAND ON YOUTUBE BY 96



JAMES SINGER

I SAW THE FIRST HALF OF NO MAN’S LAND IN 1987 AND IT WAS JUST ALL RIGHT. THE THREE OTHER EIGHTH GRADERS I WAS WITH GAVE IT A THUMBS DOWN THOUGH.



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omehow, at the start of the eighth grade school year, I got a popular pretty girl Molly Sanders to go out with me. She was a smart kid, a good kid. She had clear braces, which were hot. Everyone wanted clear braces. She rocked an Esprit bag at school too, which was key. I don’t remember how it happened, or who asked who out. I also never knew why Molly wanted to date a loser skater like me. Maybe she was trying to piss of f her parents or alienate her friends. Maybe she actually liked loser skaters. I couldn’t figure out why she liked me. She was from the rich neighborhood and I was from the poor neighborhood. She got good grades. I got bad grades. She was popular. I was unpopular. It didn’t make much sense to me.

One time in fourth grade this girl Tambi Wall’s friends told me that Tambi Wall wanted to go out with me. I had a crush on Tambi, so I got excited and made her a special Valentine’s Day card but it was all a joke. I was worried that when Molly wanted to go out with me it was a joke too but I went for it anyway.

In eighth grade, your date spots are pretty limited. Molly and I mostly held hands at lunch and figured out reasons to stay after school to hang out just a little bit longer in the library or around campus. Sometimes we would draw stuf f on each other’s lockers. This was somewhat sanctioned by the principal as long as you didn’t write anything nasty. Parents permitted dates on Friday and Saturday nights at safe spots like the local Mann Theater Sixplex near Webb Park in Rancho Bernardo or at Round Table Pizza across the street. The Ben and Jerry’s next door to Round Table was always packed with families and more mature seeming fifth graders trying to act like they were hanging out at a dif ferent table than their parents. Middle school kids not on dates went to those places too. We would try to push the drop of f and pick up times to hang out a bit in a forbidden zone like the Denny’s up the street where the high school kids were, or fake lake where the bad kids hung out.

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Getting my parents to drive me from Garden Road to Webb Park to skate, or go to the Mann Theatre, or even to go to the library was always a long shot. My parents were not much interested in leaving the house after drinking a few glasses of scotch and smoking some dirt weed that they thought I didn’t know they were smoking in the laundry room every night around 6pm. Instead of trying to get a ride from them, I decided to take the 844 bus to the corner of Rancho Bernardo Drive and Pomerado Road solo.

Once I got off the bus, there was still a 2 mile skate to the theater but I was used to it from going to Webb Park to skate. The theater people were usually cool about letting us stash our boards in the manager’s office but we weren’t allowed to bring our boards into the movie. The manger would even give you a little ticket to claim your board so there were no mix ups. The tricky part is that I would miss the last 844 bus back to Garden Road, which meant an 8 mile skate from the theater to my house. I’d done it before with Chris Mussey, and it was tough. We ended up just jumping the fence to our school and sleeping on lunch tables half way home. Chris found a lighter and a pack of smokes sitting on a table but I didn’t try any.

Luckily, my friend Terry Chambers asked me to stay over at his place when I told him my plan in P.E. The plan was always to buy a ticket to a PG movie but to sneak into an R rated movie.

The people in the ticket booth at Mann always checked our IDs if we tried to buy tickets to R rated movies. Terry and I had this plan down to a science, so when he heard girls were involved, he said he’d set it up so I could stay the night, and so we’d go get a pizza with the girls before the movie.

Terry was already a super smooth dude for an eighth grader. He got fresh barber cuts weekly, and he wore Drakkar Noir cologne.

He got new sneakers a lot. I didn’t think Terry would invite me to stay over because we got pizza at Round Table and went to the Mann theater last weekend too. His dad even got us Ben and Jerry’s. Even though I stayed at his house and his dad drove last weekend, my parents didn’t offer to drive or let Terry stay over this weekend. Last weekend, we snuck in to see The Prince of Darkness. This weekend, we wanted to see RoboCop. Terry’s dad was super cool though, and still let me stay over even though my parents were not reciprocating. Terry’s dad said Terry could get an earring as long as he didn’t wear a dangly one. Terry called me an hour after school was out and said his dad said yes.

I took a shower, got dressed up, and skated over to Terry’s. When I was leaving, my mom asked where I was going. When I told her, she gave me a $20 since I was going to stay the night at Terry’s. I already had $5 for the movie and some candy, so the $20 made it so I could pay for Molly too. The plan was for Terry’s dad to drive us over to get tickets to Can’t Buy Me Love, and then we’d sneak into RoboCop. Most of the time it worked. We usually bought tickets for a safety movie because the plan did not always work but most of the time it worked. A few weeks earlier, we bought tickets to Princess Bride and saw Princess Bride because they had a guy checking tickets for Fatal Attraction at the theater door, which they had never done before.

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We didn’t really know anything about Fatal Attraction but this kid Doug Price wanted to sneak into it because there was a scene where you could see this lady’s vagina but the door was guarded, so we saw Princess Bride. This week we figured we’d have to get tickets to Can’t Buy Me Love. It was a big gamble. If we had to watch Can’t Buy Me Love, we were screwed but we wanted to get in to see RoboCop. When we got to the theater, some of my older skater friends were out front skating around. They had a scheme to get into Barfly which was also rated R. Their plan was more risky. They got one ticket to Princess Bride, and the plan was for everyone else to wait around back. The guy with the ticket would go sneak into Barfly and open the back exit to let people into the theater. 4 dudes, one ticket. They claimed their plan was pretty fool proof. The person who opened the door would prop it open with their shoe but they had to figure out a spot to hide all their skateboards since only one dude had a ticket.

Meanwhile, Terry’s dad bought us tickets to Can’t Buy Me Love and dropped us off at the Round Table Pizza in the strip mall across the street to meet the girls. I did not want my friends to skate over and spoil everything with the girls, so I left that detail out when I told them we were going with Terry’s dad to get pizza.

Terry’s dad gave Terry a $20 bill for pizza and ice cream too. I had $25 in my pocket still. Terry had some dough with him as well. The girls were waiting for us out front. Molly was wearing a bright pink oversized cardigan over pale pink stretch pants and white flats with gold clasps and a white leather purse with a tassel zipper. Her hair was crimped and she was wearing makeup. She was much more dressed up than Jamie and her two other friends.

Molly always smelled like the Liz Claiborne perfume that she kept in the front pocket of her Esprit bag. I wondered if she had it in her purse now.

We walked into Round Table and got in line to order pizza. The restaurant was packed. It was very hot inside. The windows were a bit steamed up. There was an elementary school kid’s birthday party going on upstairs with a guy making balloon animals. All the booths below were full with families. Molly stood holding my hand. Her friends were behind us whispering. Molly studied the menu a little too carefully. I noticed her cardigan had all different buttons. The top button was square with black and white pearly polka dots. The next button was a blue triangle with wiggly gold stripes. The button below that was round, red, and silver checkered. Her pale pink stretch pants had stirrups that went down into her white flats. I wonder if that is uncomfortable. I was wearing all my back to school clothes that were clean at once—a button down Stüssy flannel under a Stüssy sweatshirt with pegged highwater Dickies, and Vans high tops.

While waiting for the pizza, we wanted to show the girls how good we were at Double Dragon. We could almost get to the hideout level on one quarter. We hadn’t beat the game yet but we were pretty close. I figured it would just take a couple more trips to the arcade before we beat the game.

I was explaining how it takes two players to beat the game when I realized Molly and the other girls weren’t really interested in Double Dragon. I told Molly we’d just play one game. It took a while though and I kind of felt like giving my game away to some kid because Molly seemed bored but Terry was into it, so I played it out but we only got to the forest level anyway.

We got the pizza, some soda, and grabbed a table in the front corner. After that, we went over to the Ben and Jerry’s next door for some scoops. Molly and I sat on a bench alone together eating our ice cream. I felt a little weird about getting a waffle cone after she just got hers in a cup. I offered her some of my waffle cone but she said she didn’t want any. Lots of other families were all around. Molly’s friends were eyeing us even though Terry was trying to talk to them. Molly’s friends all got their scoops in cups too. They kept breaking away from Terry to whisper. Terry said they were annoying.

After a while we walked over to the theater slow not really caring if we made it to the movie or not. Molly was a little worried we wouldn’t make it to the movie. There were some bad kids at Fake Lake drinking beers and smoking cigarettes. Some of the kids were older high school kids from my neighborhood. Some of the kids were skaters. They called to me and I could tell Molly and her friends were scared of them when we walked over. One of the older guys had been in a fight and was hanging back in the dark with a fat lip. They told us how the guy with the fat lip had left the other guy in the water of the Fake Lake and his friends had to pull him out before he drowned or something. “Like he almost died.” “He would’ve died if his friends didn’t pull him out of the water!” They offered us beer. “Want some beer? Want some weeeed? You kids wants some druuugs?” One of the older kids teased mimicking anti-drug commercials making the girls get more uncomfortable. I think he was out of high school already.

The scene seemed really menacing, so we moved on. Because of the bad kids, we got to the theater in time but we were going to

The air quality in 1987 was shitty in LA. The Air quality in 2020 is shitty in LA. Don’t move here.

have to talk this passel of girls into doing something bad with the whole sneaking into RoboCop idea. Terry had coupled up with Jamie Shadian at some point, so the remaining two girls were grumpy about being left out. The girls got their tickets to Can’t Buy Me Love and we went inside.

Inside the theater, there is a big centrally located concession stand, bathrooms, some arcade games up against pillars, and a bunch of people generally milling about. Everyone was standing together so we told the girls our plan to go see RoboCop. No one is covering the doors to the R rated movies. Molly and Jamie were in right away. The other two girls weren’t having it and they go to the bathroom to talk about it acting all put out about it. While they are in the bathroom, 2 Mann Theater employees set up at the doors to RoboCop as the previous showing lets out. The two girls stomp back abruptly having clearly come to a conclusion.

“We are going to watch Can’t Buy Me Love. You guys do whatever you want.” Defiantly, they go into Can’t Buy Me Love early without even getting any candy.

Molly and Jamie are still down to try to get into RoboCop but it was clear they were going to keep checking tickets. Terry looks over at a poster on a pillar and points, “Let’s check out No Man’s Land, it’s rated R and no one is checking tickets.” While in line for candy, Jamie and Molly look at the poster some more. It has Charlie Sheen on it really big and D.B. Sweeney on it much smaller but both holding guns and the unmistakable headlights of a Porsche 911. Jamie turns to Molly and whisper yells “Charlie Sheen, let’s go!” Everyone is agreed. A few seconds later, we are in. We sit low in our seats mid theater trying to seem inconspicuous. I got some Red Vines. No one wants any of my Red Vines.

The movie starts out with a synth track and a helicopter shot of the LA skyline. The title credits are pretty interpretive with this helicopter shot that changes from day to night and then you see a guy’s reflection in a window before he smashes it in slow motion.



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The first clear thing you see is a Porsche 911 targa pull into a garage at night. At first the shot is real dark, and then you see the 911 pull into the brightly lit garage. The guys in the garage start to chop up the targa and money is exchanged between a couple guys. You figure out pretty quick that one of the guys is a cop. The car is still getting chopped up, the odometer is rolled back, and the car is getting painted while the cop is doing some paperwork or whatever at his cop office. The chop shop guys nonsensically cut the car’s wiring harness. Then, you see the cop get shot. Molly grabs my arm when the cop gets shot. I hold her hand. Mine is sweaty. I hope she doesn’t mind too much. I can’t get any more Red Vines while holding her hand.

The next scene shows a guy working under a Porsche 356 cabriolet laying on a skateboard. It is Thanksgiving. The guy is D.B. Sweeney. He has a nice working class family where everyone likes everyone else.

D.B. Sweeney is a cop too. He’s a rookie making rookie moves.

Randy Quaid wants to send D.B. Sweeney to a suspected Porsche chop shop undercover. I can tell that even with the Porsches Terry isn’t very interested in the movie. Molly and Jamie are looking all over the place. I think they are half scared that we snuck into an R rated movie and half wondering if anyone else from our school snuck into an R rated movie.

The undercover rookie cop D.B. Sweeny gets a job in the San Fernando Valley at some suspected Porsche chop shop working for Bill Duke from Predator. Just when D.B. Sweeny is about to get off work on his first day, he gets sent up Mulholland and ends up fixing Charlie Sheen’s 911 cabriolet. I think Bill Duke says Charlie Sheen is the owner of the shop or something but I am not sure because everyone is whispering to each other about other stuff.

D.B. jokes that he should test out Charlie’s cab after fixing it super quick. Surprisingly, Charlie chucks D.B. the keys and they start

365 cab with a hardtop.

ripping around Mulholland. D.B. Sweeny does some pretty ugly drifting around corners and then a tunnel blast/game of chicken with oncoming traffic which impresses Charlie Sheen. I assume the tunnel is the Sepulveda tunnel, so they are on Sepulveda under Mulholland. Molly is squeezing my hand and holding my arm again during the driving scenes. I look over and Terry is into it now because of the car action. Jamie looks into it too but she is turned more towards Terry so I can’t really tell. They all stopped whispering in any case.

The next day during chop shop lunch break, the narc that vouched for D.B. Sweeney gets hassled from Bad Guy Mike Ditka and D.B. Sweeny sees it. Charlie Sheen comes in after lunch times and he’s the owner of the chop shop or something. It is all very confusing 102



actually. Molly and Jamie are whispering trying to figure it out and the adults behind us are getting annoyed. Charlie Sheen invites D.B. Sweeney to a party. The party starts at 1am. That is supposed to be shocking. 1am. D.B. Sweeney is checking out this girl Charlie Sheen is with while Charlie Sheen is talking to Bill Duke. D.B. Sweeney and the girl have some incredibly awkward looks back and forth.

The party is a super kooky 80s fancy-store-in-the-mall type party.

The Untouchables are playing. We laugh at the party scene and at The Untouchables. They are playing some song that I guess was a hit called Free Yourself. The Untouchables seem super stoked to be playing this really lame LA party. The big takeaway is that the band was having too much fun.

Randy Quaid rules.

Many Porsches have been lost on Mullholland and Sepulveda.

R.D. Call as Bad Guy Mike Ditka. ďťż

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The drummer is especially having too much fun. I have never seen someone that stoked to play drums at a party. There are some cool hairstyles and cocaine references but it isn’t a Ferrari movie, so they don’t linger over the coke issue. D.B. Sweeney sees Charlie Sheen talking to Bad Guy Mike Ditka about something.

At some point you figure out the pretty girl that was in the shop isn’t Charlie Sheen’s girlfriend but it is his sister. Terry leans over and tells me some movies are rated R just because they are boring adult movies. I am not sure if he is joking but I laugh anyways.

I hope to someday know what if feels like to be this hyped on anything.

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The movie is kind of dragging and everyone is just looking around. The girls whisper for a while before getting up and going to the bathroom right in the middle of Randy Quaid saying something that seems important.

“I think that is a bad sign bro.” Terry leans over to me. “Do you think Jamie likes me?” “Yeah, sure. I don’t know. I mean, she left 2 friends to come hang out in this movie they don’t like with us right?” “Yeah, I guess. Hey, this movie sucks, let’s try to get out of here and go back down to Fake Lake to see if those high school dudes are gone.” I am kind of feeling the overall vibe of the movie and the Porsches but I get that Terry and the girls aren’t feeling it.

The girls come back and the movie is still kind of dragging along.

Charlie and D.B. go to repo a car. It is still unclear to me if Charlie is the chop shop guy that shot the cop or if it is Bad Guy Mike Ditka but it seems sketchy that he wants D.B. to go “repo” a car.

Charlie Sheen’s shop and the chop shop at the start of the movie look different. Randy Quaid is stuck on Charlie Sheen being the bad guy but Bad Guy Mike Ditka seems like the obvious choice.

There are more Porsches but mainly the kind you just see tennis moms driving, like cabs and targas. I mean, it’s cool if you are stuck in a midwestern nightmare winter and you have a fantasy of driving with your top down along the California coast in a Porsche with the roof gone on the way to tennis practice. I just want mine with a lightweight roof panel and no sunroof. Anyways, this movie just seems to have the models I never considered cool so far.

So, they are in a cabriolet and they are going to steal and/or repo a targa. Even as a someone who wants a Porsche someday, the cab and targa models aren’t grabbing me. I know G Body 911s aren’t for everyone but they could have thrown in a 930 Turbo by now or even a Carrera Coupe rather than all these cabs and targas normally reserved for dentists, tennis moms, and rich kids of dentists and tennis moms. If Charlie Sheen is the bad guy, an all black 930 Turbo would be way more menacing than a triple black cab.

Were there coke dealers in the 80s that did not have a white on white Turbo flachbau? If this guy is the bad guy, give him a 930 black on black turbo. I guess Ice-T has a Turbo flachbau cab on the cover of Rhyme Pays, so anything goes.

The whole repo thing doesn’t go so well and D.B. Sweeney gets chased by some valets. He actually clears the valet booth. If I was a criminal mastermind, Charlie Sheen could take any car keys and car he wants while the valets are chasing D.B. all over the place.

The valet dudes go all out trying to catch D.B. It seems like the chase goes on for blocks. Across Sunset, down a public staircase, even down a dirt embankment. How far are those valet dudes willing to go from their lot at this point to catch a guy that didn’t even actually get in a car? One of them even throws a metal pipe at D.B. and bounces it off the hood of a Mercedes. D.B. gets away and Charlie picks him up on another street. D.B. is into it. He’s not acting at this point. Getting chased by valet parkers got him hyped. Is D.B. going to break bad? He wants to go back to get the car. D.B. is charged.

Molly and Jamie are super restless at this point. The foot chase didn’t grab Terry either. He is kind of whispering to Jamie and he has his arm around her now and she is leaning into him. They are in their own zone. Meanwhile, D.B. and Charlie get the car later that night but all they show is them showing up to Charlie’s house so he can put on a Lakers hat that is totally out of place with the rest of his outfit. They drink some champagne. Charlie lets D.B. keep the car for the night. Charlie’s sister is there too.

Awkward looks are exchanged again.

D.B. goes back the next day to creep on Charlie’s sister. Is he a cop or is he a bad guy now? The estate tour/romance scene goes askew when Charlie’s pretty sister elbows D.B. in the face playing basketball. D.B. gets a bloody nose. The story is kind of hard to follow.

Since D.B. successfully repoed the targa, I guess he gets dialed into the crew and they put him with some hessian dude listening to Metal Church in a 70s Dodge Van with a deadhead sticker on the windshield. They cruise to the Westside Pavilion to jack a car.

The illusion of the Porsche shop being a legit business is totally gone and I am getting into the movie now. But D.B. gets popped by the mall rent a cops pretty quick. To make it worse, some dudes from Bad Guy Mike Ditka’s crew cuts D.B.’s hand with a box cutter while he is handcuffed to some random station wagon waiting for the rent a cops to get real cops to come. At this point, Molly goes, “ewww” and gets up again. Jamie gets up too and so does Terry. “Let’s bail, this movie sucks.” The adults behind us try to look around us with annoyed glances as we are getting up.

It’s a drama. They’re into it.

We walk out into the lobby and a concession worker looks at us annoyed. She says something to a guy standing on the other side of the concession stand. He looks at us and frowns as he crosses his arms leaning back on the concession stand. Terry says, “come on, let’s go.” I can tell they are on to us since everyone has been whispering and getting up and walking all around even though we snuck in.

We go out the front doors and it is a nice crisp October night with a hint of wet asphalt in the air. Molly and Jamie seem to have forgotten about their friends in Can’t Buy Me Love. We walk down to the Fake Lake and the bad older kids are still down there. 

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They have a cement trash can fire going and are playing Metallica Ride the Lightning from a blown out boom box. Some of the guys are pushing each other and spraying everyone while shotgunning cans of beer. We stick to the shadows and walk to a dark area by the library where I usually skate with my friends. The bad kids don’t notice us. Terry and Jamie disappear over to a dark corner up some stairs on a bench under a tree. Molly and I sit on a bench closer to the library near a planter and some shrubs so the bad kids can’t see us. Molly leans over and kisses me kind of abruptly. I kissed a girl before, so I know what I am doing.

“You can put your hand up my shirt but not under my bra” she says between kissing. “Its ok.” I don’t know why I said that, its ok? It just seemed weird to talk about it like that. There is another awkward pause. We don’t really have anything to say. After some more not very good kissing, Jamie and Terry come over, “Our parents are going to be here soon.” We walk back up to the theater. The bad kids are still screaming and jumping around throwing stuff. Terry’s dad is already waiting backed into a spot facing the front of the theater in his maroon Z. He sees us walk up the driveway to the lot but lets us wait with Molly and Jamie until Jamie’s parents show up. The other girls come out of the theater still clearly mad at us. Jamie’s mom shows up in a big blue Suburban and they all get in. We watch them leave and then get into Terry’s dad’s Z.

I Saw the Second Half of No Man’s Land In 1994 and It Was Better Than the First Half.

The two other dudes I watched it with only paid half attention but it made them decide to go check out the street races that night instead of playing chess, which seems worth mentioning.

We’ve been in Blockbuster for over an hour looking for something to rent and Adam has seen every Jean Claude Van Damme movie they’ve got. “I would watch Bloodsport again” I tell him.

Adam is turning over a Steven Seagal movie to read the back cover and I am holding A Better Tomorrow but we just watched a bootleg copy of Hard Boiled last night, so it is a hard sell. We cannot come to an agreement. Neither of us need to be at work tomorrow though because neither of us has a job. It is 103 degrees outside, so we aren’t going out there except to get to and from a car, or from one air-conditioned area to another. It is going to be 106 tomorrow they say. We’re both sleeping until 2pm daily.

We’re staying up late enough to see the newspaper deliveryman in his truck cruising Adam’s cul-de-sac every morning before I go home. We are part of the North County San Diego chapter of the Late Bloomers Club. Although we graduated from high school a year ago, we are living at our parents houses wondering what is going on. We mostly drive around in Adam’s giant red 1971 convertible Cadillac El Dorado that he traded his purple 1992 25th Anniversary Z28 for after reading Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

by Hunter S Thompson. The only time we cruise around with the top down is after the sun goes down.

I come across a video with a picture of Charlie Sheen holding a gun leaning against a 911 Carrera on some deep dish wheels. D.B. Sweeny is in the background. It reminds me of my 8th grade date 106



70s Dodge Van, Grateful Dead Sticker, and Metal—this is how to get chicks.

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with Molly Sanders. I remember the first half of the movie but we were more into the idea of going down to Fake Lake than with finishing the movie. At some point, we stopped even going to the first half of the movies. There are a few copies in a new release endcap. I grab one and walk over to Adam, “Have you seen this?”

He looks it over. “No.” I tell him it has Porsches and is a cop drama. I add that we should watch it with Point Break because it is just Point Break with Porsches instead of surfboards. Adam has a copy of Point Break at home. He tried to learn how to surf the summer Point Break was out in theaters. A Point Break poster still hangs on his bedroom wall. “Without No Man’s Land, there would be no Point Break.” I add that I’ll get it on my account.

We get back into the big red El Dorado and I light a cigarette from one of the four cigarette lighters. The air conditioning is coming out ice cold but we have the windows down so we can smoke.

We go to 7-Eleven for some snacks and get burritos from the taco shop next door on the other side of the laundromat. We get back to Adam’s vacant air-conditioned house just before the daytime temperature peaks.

The first half of the movie is just how I remember it. The hessian kid with his 70s van with the Dead Head sticker rocking Metal Church leaves old D.B. in the underground garage to get popped by the rent a cops and then the goon’s from Bad Guy Mike Ditka’s crew beat him up a little and cut his hand with a box cutter.

I remember the bad guy looking like Mike Ditka and everything.

D.B. gets bailed out by Randy Quaid. Randy Quaid has D.B. call in to Bill Duke to tell him he got arrested and D.B. one ups it by screaming into the phone and quitting real dramatic like. I can’t tell if Randy Quaid is being ironic or not but he seems into it.

Later, D.B. goes to hang out with Charlie Sheen’s sister again. I guess they had a date set up but I don’t remember that. Adam’s brother shows up during the Metal Church scene and brings me his copy of The Dark on vinyl and plays me some of Ton of Bricks on his guitar but it’s not plugged in, so I don’t really know what he is doing. I just laugh like I understand and go, “yeah!” “Ton of Bricks!” he yells to Adam now as if his guitar is plugged in. “Awesome!” Adam isn’t really paying attention and has started making some kind of vanilla weight gainer shake thing on the blender in the kitchen. I cannot hear the dialogue.

While all this is going on Charlie Sheen’s sister is making breakfast now and Charlie comes in and starts eating crepes. D.B. walks in and I put it together. He slept over. They’re eating crepes and Charlie says they are going to throw a Christmas party. Everything is pretty confusing. You get to hear part of Charlie Sheen’s phone conversation while he is waiting for D.B. Sweeney outside.

I like it. He’s telling someone, “it just doesn’t work that way.” I get a kick out of how he says it. “you tell him” and he gives a little laugh as he hangs up.

It wasn’t just that I was in eighth grade the last time I saw the movie. The narrative and editing is really jumpy. All of a sudden we are on Rodeo Drive. Charlie and D.B. come out of the old Jerry Magnin store in Beverly Hills and D.B. is now dressed like Charlie on top but with his same crappy jeans and big dorky 108



white sneakers on the bottom for some reason. I guess he’s a jeans and t-shirt guy to Charlie Sheen’s west coast slicko Miami Vice vibe. Whatever. D.B.’s outfit makes even less sense now. Not one person on the earth looks good with a sportscoat and jeans with big white sneakers. No one. There is no way to rock that outfit and look anything less than a dork who cannot dress himself as an adult man. You are not fooling anyone with your sportscoat. Just be honest and downgrade the jacket, even to a less formal sportscoat, or a proper light jacket, or upgrade the pants and shoes. You should have learned that by the time you graduated high school. Maybe that is the wardrobe person’s point. D.B. Sweeney’s wardrobe captures his character. He is a rookie dork thrown out into a sea full of slicko sharks. Charlie Sheen, Bad Guy Mike Ditka, and Randy Quaid are old pros playing some game that has the dork kid D.B. Sweeney stuck in the middle.

Charlie Sheen, Bad Guy Mike Ditka, and Randy Quaid come off as slick and jaded with the game they are playing. They act the part and look the part. D.B. is so clueless, he’ll wear anything and do anything. I start to realize, D.B. Sweeney is acting the part and looking the part too.

D.B. suggests they steal a Ferrari, and Charlie Sheen corrects him with the best line in the entire movie, “Nah, Italian trash.” Charlie looks across the street at a 930 flachbau turbo look Carrera and adds, “Besides, I only steal Porsches—like that one.” They get in the car and without much hassle drive away. It is a proper Porsche in every way. This is the proper Charlie Sheen bad guy car. Black on black, no sunroof, proper old door clunk, and when they drive away, it actually sounds like a turbo look rather than a turbo with the best all time personalized plate in any movie, “PVTDNCR.” Now Adam and his brother are into the movie.

That was a really slow burn to get to this point. D.B. and Charlie are driving in the flachbau 911 and a call comes through on the cell. D.B. answers and says, “Rick? No Rick’s not here…Who am I? I’m the guy stealing Rick’s car.” OK. The movie just got good.

It took almost an hour to get to this point but sticking with it pays off.

Charlie and D.B. get cocky and go back to The Westside Pavilion in a taxi. Bad Guy Mike Ditka’s crew is oddly patrolling the mall to make sure Charlie’s crew doesn’t steal any cars from that mall, which strikes me as super unlikely and a waste of gang member power in the hard streets of LA unless they were on an Orange Julius run for criminal mastermind Bad Guy Mike Ditka and just happened to see Charlie and D.B. Bad Guy Mike Ditka’s goons suck at chasing people too. At this point, I feel like D.B. is in. Is he still a cop? He seems to have graduated. His pants graduate between waking into the mall and getting on the elevator. He picks up an ice cream cone too. I think the pants thing is just eluded to because he has another shopping bag now but he had that thing when they got out of the cab and walked into the mall, so I don’t know what the hell is going on anymore. What happened to the black 930 flachbau? I guess the big dorky white tennis shoes are gone too. In any case, it’s a big day for D.B. Just an hour or so ago in the film he was laying on a skateboard under a non-running 356 Thanksgiving Day, at this point he is eating crepes and stealing multiple 911s a day wearing a completely new outfit, he has an ice cream, and he is hooked up with Charlie Sheen’s pretty but seemingly fragile maybe clueless sister.

an i l a It ash !

Tr

D.B. Sweeney in the biggest blouse of the movie.

PVTDNCR I argue this is the best personalized license plate ever. If you have better, send it in and we’ll print it.

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Adam’s brother is telling me lots of Porsche facts now. He says his red '92 MR2 Turbo with NOS is faster, and that there is a place in Clairemont Mesa where guys on crotch rockets race 911 Turbos. “But they all meet at Ross?” We all decide to go because it is Saturday night. Adam is into the movie now that the tempo has stepped up into Van Damme territory.

Charlie and D.B. lose the goons without even knowing they were being chased and pick up a silver 930 turbo from the garage on what looks like gold Etoile wheels. On the way out, they notice a red cab but right before they can take that one Bad Guy Mike Ditka’s goons just start shooting bullets at them in an underground parking garage full of people at The Westside Pavilion in broad garage light. Bad Guy Mike Ditka pops out of nowhere in an early 80s Camaro with the amazing personalized license plate Malo 1. This movie kills the personalized license plate game for all other movies after. Adam and his brother sit up. At one time, Adam had a purple 25th anniversary Z28, and his brothers both had earlier late 80s Z28s, one black and one white. I say the Camaro has no chance against a 930 Turbo and they both say, “No way!” in unison.

I am not sure how it happens but some other bad guys in a Lincoln Continental do a J-turn into the chase. The stunt driving in this movie is solid. In real life, the Continental couldn’t hang in this chase on an open road unless significant work had been done to it. In the Westside Pavilion garage, the 930 turbo seems to be smoking the Camaro and the Continental. Once they are out of the garage, the Continental seems on the 930 Turbo, which is some movie magic. Even after the continental smacks into a Dodge truck, it is still right on the Turbo.

The Continental crashes again and is out so Bad Guy Mike Ditka in his Malo 1 Camaro are up but D.B. blasts into a warehouse to hide. The warehouse gambit doesn’t work, so they blast out of there and the Camaro seems able to keep up with the 930 turbo.

Finally, D.B. jackknifes a Pepsi truck and Bad Guy Mike Ditka kickflips his car into it.

There is no way anyone would survive that crash without severe injuries, so I assume Bad Guy Mike Ditka is out.

Adam and his brother are amped by the

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I worked at Etoile for a while building wheels when Peter Stacy bought the company around 1995 and renamed it Kinesis, so I am 63.5% sure those are Etoiles but also 36.5% sure they are Gottis.

Bad Guy Mike Ditka in Malo 1, which is the second best movie personalized plate.

Malo 1 Kickflip.

chase scene. Charlie and D.B. take the silver 930 to a different shop at night and Bill Duke is there. Charlie laces D.B. up with some cash and the first targa he “repoed.” The targa is red now. D.B. rolls out in his new targa rocking some Lou Gramm that I guess he just had on him? Some chicks getting out of an '87 Ford Thunderbird check him out in his targa, which is pretty much what I figure people were doing in 70s targas in the late 80s to people valet parking Thunderbirds at Hollywood clubs. D.B. is really feeling it and I wonder again if he is a cop still.

Things start to unravel when Charlie goes into the shop the next day and finds Bill Duke murdered. Then, D.B. blows his own cover in front of a bunch of random cops. Shit gets real when Charlie Sheen wants D.B. Sweeney to carry a gun out with him on Christmas Eve. They go looking for Bad Guy Mike Ditka but when Charlie miraculously finds him dancing after looking through multiple clubs, he sends D.B. to go look somewhere else so he can cap Ditka himself without D.B. knowing, which makes me wonder if he knows D.B. is a cop already.

When D.B. gets back to his apartment Charlie’s sister is waiting for him for some reason. She is also confused by his wardrobe.

He does a bunch of super shady explaining.

Charlie’s sister is a super rich kid, so I think she is bummed on D.B.’s shitty apartment.

She’s sketched out by the whole situation but makes out with D.B. anyways, just like real life!

Adam and his brother aren’t paying attention again. Adam’s brother is frying some hamburger meat on a pan. He puts in in a bowl, pours catsup all over it, and comes back over.

Adam is playing chess against his electronic chessboard and when I notice, he says we should go to that café where people play chess when it cools down later. I say okay.

I guess Charlie didn’t know what’s up because this other cop that was there when D.B. blew his cover rats on D.B. to Charlie and Charlie seems surprised. I can tell he has a plan right away though. The rat cop tries to blackmail Charlie but that can go both ways if he shows D.B. who the rat cop is. I don’t know if it is the same night, or the next night but the timeline is super confusing. Charlie Sheen shoots Bad Guy Mike Ditka on Christmas Eve. Then, Charlie and D.B. go to the party at Charlie’s house on Christmas Eve. If they are meeting the rat cop the same night, that’s a lot of shit to go down in one night. If it is the next night, they are meeting on Christmas. If it is the same night, D.B. somehow changed super quick back into his crappy clothes.

At some point you realize it was the rat cop that killed the other cop at the start of the movie. I was kind of not paying attention at this point because I was hoping it was Charlie’s sister who killed the cop in the start, which would be the only way to redeem her super vapid character. I even told Adam and his brother my theory. You don’t really see the person who shoots the cop, you just see that they are wearing a Burberry trench and the gun looks like a Walther PPK, which is a one of two small guns Charlie Sheen carries in the movie. But maybe she is just an insipid rich kid. It would be a genius twist for Dick Wolf to put in there though.

The only woman with more than 2 speaking lines turns out to be Charlie’s partner all along in some twisted turn. Maybe she isn’t even Charlie’s sister, and D.B. got caught up in some sick love triangle. In the end, she is the mastermind behind the whole thing running the Porsche chop shop game in LA. When her back is against the wall, she isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty.

I owe you a 10 second car.

The rat cop realizes D.B. Sweeney is with Charlie Sheen and freaks out that his cover is blown too now, which you can kind of just guess Charlie planned from the moment he found out about the whole thing. The rat cop is about to shoot D.B. but Charlie creeps up and takes him out with his cab. That part is pretty good writing by Dick Wolf even if the film makers are kind of messing up the narrative because now D.B. is in a real double bind. No Man’s Land.

D.B. doubles down on his rookie dork stupidity and goes straight to Randy Quaid’s house to tattle about what went down with Charlie. However, now we know that Charlie is this proper mastermind, and you can just guess that he’s creeping back there somewhere watching what D.B. will do. Also, you find out, all this shit is going down on Christmas I think. Randy Quaid says Bad Guy Mike Ditka got shot last night, Christmas Eve, so that means, all this new shit is going down on Christmas night.

Sketchy move to pitch someone onto your rag top.

When Adam’s brother finishes his hamburger meat with catsup on it, he grabs his guitar, his Metal Church album, and he goes back to his room. Adam gets up and says he’s going to take a shower and get ready to go to the café. He disappears upstairs.

When D.B. leaves Randy Quaid’s house, he somehow doesn’t notice his bro Charlie Sheen parked like one car away in the triple black cab he’s had the whole movie. D.B. blasts off down the street in his really red targa. Everything is getting way out of control now. Instead of dealing with all this shit, D.B. decides to go try to smooth things out with Charlie’s sister.

The world is ending: obtain ingredients, and make breakfast. 

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He makes some intensely awkward attempt at telling Charlie’s sister the truth but then has sex with her instead. The next morning, everything is great. D.B. goes out to get all kinds of nice things for breakfast. Unfortunately, his uncle shows up and blows any remaining aspect of his cover to Charlie’s sister. Charlie’s Sister is not the criminal mastermind. She’s just an upset simpleton. She bails in a kind of crying confusion, so D.B. tries to contact Randy Quaid instead of dealing with Charlie’s sister but Charlie Sheen already killed Randy Quaid, so things are getting even more out of control. The mega boss cop who was the boss cop in Bladerunner tells D.B. he is off the case and to go home. There is no more “off the case” for D.B. because now it’s personal.

The one redeeming thing Charlie’s sister does in the entire movie is tell Charlie that D.B. is a cop. Charlie doesn’t even respond though. She’s too late. Charlie knows, and he’s headed to meet D.B. for their final showdown at the Westside Pavilion. The showdown is going to happen next to what looks like a mid 70s Carrera.

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Adam wants to go to this café to play chess. Ever since he read Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and got the big El Dorado, I haven’t been able to drive my own car but Adam’s brother wants to show us what his MR2 Turbo can do at the high roller races.

Adam and his brother jump in the MR2. I get in my SE-R and pick up my friend Joe around the corner.

We drive over to the Ross parking lot in Clairemont together. We pull into the lot about 15 after midnight and it is full of Porsches, Ducatis, and a few other exotics.

The End. 3

@jamesinger

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"OPINIONS AND EDUCATION" Words + Photos TRENT WHICKER Tennessee that would have it out with a concours judge on the authenticity of the Telefunken radio he had in his car. I would also recollect old stories about how he would get his ‘63 Coupe off road and air born from time to time on mountain roads.

My point is there is a generational shift that scares the living crap out of old birds. Recently, I decided to seek advice on transporting a car to a local event. I decided to call a renowned P-Car and 356er I remember from my upbringing in Knoxville. An old friend of Dad’s, so I thought. The tone of his voice as we spoke on the phone wasn’t what I expected, mostly frustration. He asked what my intentions were of Dad’s cars. This is still a sensitive subject for me as I’m just now being able to enjoy them the way I want. I told him I wasn’t intending on selling anything in the near future and to my surprise he rebuked stating the [monetary] value of these cars will only drop and that because of the disinterest of the younger generations, there’s no point in keeping classic cars. “Their value has come and gone.”

P-E

Here’s a topic that is floated around at every local car show— Age. I usually overhear something like, “I’m just not sure what these cars will be worth, you know? My grandkids are more interested in iPhones and iPads. They’re not even interested in getting their license. When I was their age that’s all I wanted!”

This is an intricacy of the car world that I have only recently surveyed. Why even drive old cars? I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Lana’s wonderful commentary from the last issue on self-driving and how technology will eventually win over a generation of commuter drivers. At least those who prefer to forgo the stress of crowded roads, distracted drivers, and tractor-trailers. My wife can attest.

According to McKeel Hagerty (the insurance guy), "As we approach the age of driverless cars, our company's mission is to save driving for future generations," He continues by saying, "Part of that commitment is helping the next generation learn the art of safely driving themselves."

So is it all safety? Are car companies going to surrender the roads to computer companies on how to decide how we should transport ourselves? It is a lot to consider. Any car nut can attest that driving a classic analog car where you must shift gears and rely on 20-plus year braking technology to ‘compete’ with modern traffic takes more skill and attention. Driving classic cars may very well improve driving skills and defensive driving, however, we eventually place our selves in the cross hairs of distracted drivers behind the wheel of large automobiles (any David Byrne fans out there?), or at least mini vans.

I digress. Imagine why you love cars. Chances are if your parent had a cool car it definitely had a profound effect on you and probably why you are reading this magazine. This automatically made them heroes too, of course. My Dad was as much a superhero to my friends as to me. I grew up in Porsche family and I still remember Dad would drop me off at school in his ’87 G body Carrera. My classmates would ask if they could get a ride with me to the movie theatre later that weekend. I guess I made friends in the process too. Thanks, Dad. He bought three ‘crappy’ 356 Porsches in the mid-eighties, before I was born. Back then, even in rural Tennessee, they were quite common. Often VW guys would swap the engines in their buggies and you would typically find a rolling chassis from time to time, cheaply. They were just dubs after all. With little issue, you could get the matching engine back in good time, however you had to speak their language (it wasn’t German).

My father passed in 2009. His Porsche friends sent their condolences in cards and phone calls. Some I still see at Amelia every year and they would share stories about this Redneck from

This warped interpretation will be revisited in more issues of Hypertrash I’m sure. Fact is many fail to notice what they are actually looking at. I agree that cars can be an investment, rolling art, eye candy—but they’re also machines, culture icons, and even emotional connections!

Especially today, we begin to notice a new fellowship of new car enthusiasts; un-traditionalist outlaws willing to take the attainable, ‘no value’ engine swapped 356s and 911s of thirty years ago and made them the epicenter of a new generation of enthusiasts today. Modern guys like Matt Hummel, Rod Emory, and Leh Keen come to mind.

Why discourage someone from enjoying something you do, just in a different way? If you start merging a passion with an investment strategy you will eventually lose one way or another.

I guess that scares a lot of folks.

My dad had three rules at car shows. 1) Look, don’t touch! 2) Always ask questions 3) When you do have a question, to ask the owner. Regarding point 3, how this person responds will tell you a lot about their personality. In conclusion, don’t be mean to people.

Similar to the art world, there will be critics saying what you can and cannot do, even with your personal life. Despite this, I am confident that the new car world will inevitably beat out the elitists. Purists beware! There will be a new generation of petrol heads knocking at the door ready to take those ‘lost causes’ off your hands!

Cheers, Trent

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"...they would share stories about this Redneck fromTennessee that would have it out with a concours judge on the authenticity of the Telefunken radio he had in his car."

1963 356 "B" Sunroof Coupe Outlaw that belonged to Trent's father. Equipped with a later model "C" engine with bore kit, 12volt swap, sport exhaust, 550 Spyder mirror, bumper delete. It was Dad's first Porsche and has been family owned for over 35 years.

Here it is parked in front of a perfectly appropriate mural of youthful adventure and wonder. By artist Ali Kay. Chattanooga, Tennessee. Ali Kay is one of the contributors of the McCallie Murals Project - "The World's First Drive Through Theatre". ďťż

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COUNTERPOINT With RHYS HAYDON Racing, I’ve never been.

I can say I like the idea of racing, until really thinking about it. Watching it on TV is good and I spend hours each month following my teams and reviewing their race footage. There are a few classic segments I have watched over and over like Leh Keen’s ‘Rain Dance.’

If you ask me how my weekend was my answer may depend on Porsche race results.

But I have never been on a racetrack. It’s just never really come up. I am sure the competition aspect of it would be thrilling, I have always enjoyed competition. But there’s that driving fast thing, and that doesn’t appeal to me. Maybe if it was a slow race car I could handle it?

For now at least I will continue looking in from the outside, with the knowledge that I will never be fast, don’t have the skill, am too cheap to build or buy a race car. Perhaps overall I just really enjoy racing as an idea. Maybe imagining myself flying through the corners, hitting the apexes, and outbreaking the competition is enough.

PHOTO: NAPOLITANO

@therhys 

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HYPERTRASH QUARTERLY SPRING 2020 VOLUME 1 / ISSUE 1 ALSO AVAILABLE IN DIGITAL! (back issues available in print sometimes)

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