Bayou Catholic Magazine March 2020

INSIDE Marriage

Bayou

Catholic

The official magazine of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux

Priests’ convocation 2020 Fraternity and unity is strong

MARCH 2020 ~ VOL. 40 NO. 9 ~ COMPLIMENTARY

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Annual Bishop’s Appeal 20202020 Annual Bishop’s Appeal

Please prayerfully consider a generous donation today.

Ways to Give:

By Mail:

Your gift to the 2020 Annual Bishop’s Appeal will directly assist:

Catholic Schools, Seminarian Education, Religious Education, and Support of our Retired Priests

At your Parish: Place your envelope in the In-Pew collection on Sunday

Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Annual Bishop’s Appeal Office Post Office Box 505 Schriever, LA 70395

Your pledge is key to continued growth in ministries that strive to live the Lord’s Mission.

Please make checks payable to Annual Bishop’s Appeal.

Online: Visit our secure online giving site at www.htdiocese.org/bishopsappeal

For more information on how your gift can make an impact please call 985-850-3122

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 3

Contents

Features 28 Mary’s Manor

By Janet Marcel

Columns 8 Comfort For My People

By Bishop Shelton J. Fabre

12

Pope Speaks

Pope Francis I

13

Questions of Faith

By Father Glenn LeCompte

14

Readings Between the Lines

By Father Glenn LeCompte

33

Reading With Raymond

By Raymond Saadi

50 Overtime

By Ed Daniels

In Every Issue 6 From the Editor 16 Scripture Readings 22 Heavenly Recipes 30 Youth In Action 32 Daily Prayer for Priests,

Deacons and Seminarians

37

Diocesan Events

Guest Column 24 Marching for a culture of life

By Kimberly Russo

Announcements 34 St. Joseph Altars 36 Catholic school grant winners 38 Parish Lenten missions 40 Parish social ministry gathering 45 Financial Report On Our Cover

TYLER NEIL/BAYOU CATHOLIC

4 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

The priests of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux recently met at the Manresa Retreat Center in Convent for the annual priests’ convocation. Bishop Shelton J. Fabre in his monthly column Comfort for My People writes about the convocation and the fraternity and unity of the diocesan clergy.

Bayou Catholic How to reach us:

BY PHONE: (985) 850-3132

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BY MAIL: P.O. Box 505 Schriever, LA 70395

BY FAX: (985) 850-3232

BY E-MAIL: bayoucatholic@htdiocese.org The Bayou Catholic is published monthly, for the people of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux by the H-T Publishing Co., P.O. Box 505, Schriever, LA 70395.

Subscription rate is $35 per year.

The Bayou Catholic is a member of the Catholic Press Association, the National Newspaper Association and an associate member of the Louisiana Press Association.

Lawrence Chatagnier

editor and general manager

April LeBouef

business manager

Janet Marcel

staff writer/administrative assistant

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Brooks Lirette

advertising accounts executive

Lisa Schobel Hebert graphic designer

Meridy Liner

accounts receivable/payable assistant

Like us on Facebook or Find us on the web www.bayoucatholic.org

Where to find your Bayou Catholic

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h

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Marriage 51 BRENNER PHOTOGRAPHY & FILMS

Bayou Catholic magazine can be found at all Catholic churches and Catholic schools throughout the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux.

To pick up a copy, you may also visit the merchants who advertise in our issue. Those wishing to receive the magazine by mail can call Janet Marcel at (985) 850-3132 or write to Bayou Catholic, P.O. Box 505, Schriever, LA 70395.

Subscription price is $35 annually. For the online edition, go to www.bayoucatholic.com

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 5

From the Editor

In this issue ...

The March issue has much to offer: Information and inspirational stories for all

The month of March is upon us and we are in the midst of the Lenten season. As I look through the pages of this issue, I can’t help but think there are many events happening in the diocese. There is also much more to come in the following months as we celebrate Holy Week next month and venture into the glorious Easter season.

Before we get too ahead of ourselves let me tell you about this issue of Bayou Catholic. As you may have noticed on the cover, the priests of the diocese gathered for their annual convocation. Bishop Shelton J. Fabre in his column Comfort for My People, reflects on the latest convocation. The bishop explains the day to day reflections of the convocation and assures us that the convocation was a wonderful experience for all. He goes on to say that we have great priests in our diocese and their fraternity and unity is strong.

Father Glenn LeCompte continues where he left off in February with his column Readings Between the Lines. He refers to the Pew Research study which calls attention to the fact that there is a low percentage of Catholics who believe in the real presence of Christ in the

Eucharist. I suggest that all take time to read the column and reflect on how Jesus makes his saving presence available to us in the Eucharist.

Nearly 200 men gathered for Christ the Redeemer’s Rise Up!, a men’s gathering that was held at Christ the Redeemer Church in Thibodaux. Those in attendance expressed gratitude for the day and welcomed the communal atmosphere.

You can read about the event in this issue.

If you didn’t have the opportunity to attend this year, there’s always next year!

Kimberly Russo, a 10th grade religion and P.E. teacher at Central Catholic School in Morgan City, offers her account of the annual Washington, D.C., March for Life that was held in January. Along with Kimberly, four students from Central Catholic share their experiences of the pilgrimage and how it impacted them.

You will find Kimberly’s guest column “Marching for a culture of life” in this issue.

There’s a special feature in this issue entitled “Mary’s Manor, a gift to God’s family.” The feature highlights the donation of the Danos family home to the diocese. The children of the late Al and Mary Danos representing the Mary and Al Danos Family Foundation donated their parents’ home to the diocese. In the story, the siblings share their fond memories of the home. Read the feature to see how the diocese plans to utilize the beautiful home located on the bank of Bayou Lafourche.

For those who enjoy visiting St. Joseph Altars, in this issue there is a complete list of the altars and viewing times. There is sure to be an altar near you.

We asked and the church parishes

6 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

responded. There is a list of all the parish Lenten missions in the diocese during the month of March.

The diocesan financial report for the fiscal year July 1, 2018, to June 30, 2019, is included in this issue of Bayou Catholic. This report is just one element of the accountability and transparency that the diocese strives to practice on a continuing basis. The format is revamped for our Bayou Catholic readers.

The March issue also includes a 17page Marriage Special. The special includes marriage preparation guidelines for the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux, as well as articles and advice for couples planning to marry and newly married couples.

The March issue of Bayou Catholic has much to offer. In addition to the features and specials mentioned above, there are our usual guest columns, events and announcements in this issue. Please remember to support our advertisers who help by advertising in the Bayou Catholic. Without them we would not be able to provide the Catholic faithful of the diocese with what we feel is a top notch diocesan publication.

Remember, after reading Bayou Catholic, pass it on to a friend or relative who might not be attending Mass. It’s one of the great ways to do your part in spreading the Good News! BC

Lawrence

Lawrence Chatagnier Editor & General Manager

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 7

Comment

We have great priests in our diocese; fraternity and unity is strong

Bishop Shelton J. Fabre

For the past several years, the priests of our diocese have gathered annually for a convocation. This gathering was originally the result of our diocesan listening sessions and strategic pastoral plan. The hope for the convocation is to allow our priests to spend time together in renewal, camaraderie, prayer and continuing formation. My hope is to share with you some of the fruits of my experience of our recent 2020 annual priests’ convocation. Further, I hope that you will be able to take some of these thoughts and apply them to your own lives.

On our first day, the goal was to look back over the past year since the last convocation in 2019. Reflecting on the past helps us to locate ourselves in the midst of some of the chaos of life and makes clear to us where we have been and where God has been working in our lives. Over the course of a year, a lot can happen, and we can forget the good things that God has done in our lives, as well as the challenges that we have overcome.

On the morning of the second day, we reflected on the experience of disappointment. Doubtless you have experienced disappointments during this past year. It is what we do with disappointment that is most important.

We can allow disappointment to morph into contempt, which steals our joy and makes us bitter, or we can take disappointment and use it

as an opportunity for greater depth.

Disappointment is a powerful force that exposes the places in our hearts where we can still mature and grow deeper.

On the afternoon of the second day, we reflected on the reality of the priest in persona Christi capitis. This is the understanding that the priest, especially when he celebrates the sacraments, stands “in the person of Jesus Christ our head.” Understanding this reality, we know that when we receive the sacraments through the

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Please remember to pray for our priests, deacons, religious men and women, and seminarians!!

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Comfort For My People

priest it is the person of Jesus who acts in our lives. The power and grace of the sacraments always come from Jesus.

This is an important reality to integrate, and it is an important responsibility to live as a priest. As priests, we need to recognize that we are called to be the person of Jesus to others. As priests, we must also recognize the person of Jesus as he comes to us in a unique way in the ministry of our brother priests, but also the ways that Jesus comes to us in others. As people of faith, we need to recognize the person of Jesus as he

8 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

comes to us uniquely in the ministry of our priests, but also the ways that Jesus comes to us in one another.

On the morning of the third day, we reflected on how we long to be in companionship with Jesus Christ. If we are faithful to ongoing discernment and spiritual growth, we are confident that we will arrive at the place in our lives and spirituality where we recognize Jesus as our constant companion on the journey through life. As priests and as members of the lay faithful, we need to remember this ongoing challenge to grow in spiritual maturity with the Lord, constantly surrendering our lives to him.

On the afternoon of the third day, we reflected on the fraternity shared among our priests. Each priest lives as part of a “presbyterate,” the collective body of priests in a particular diocese.

Each priest is ordained into an already existing support structure of brother priests who are there to support and provide for him. However, no collection of human beings is perfect, and the presbyterate is no different. Just as family members disagree, brother priests will also disagree. However, just as families heal hurts, priests also desire to heal hurts among the presbyterate as well.

The convocation was again a wonderful experience!! It reminded me that we have great priests who serve in our diocese, and our fraternity and unity as priests is strong and getting stronger. Over the short course of these four days, our priests were able to rest, pray and spend much needed leisure time with each other. It is my hope that you may have noticed a joyful change in your parish priest before reading this article. I hope this reflection is as helpful for you as our convocation was for our priests. Please remember to pray for our priests, deacons, religious men and women, and seminarians!! BC

“Each priest is ordained into an already existing support structure of brother priests who are there to support and provide for him.�

Comentario

Tenemos sacerdotes maravillosos en nuestra diócesis; la fraternidad y unidad es fuerte celebra los sacramentos, actúa “en la Persona de Jesucristo nuestra cabeza”. Entendiendo esta realidad, sabemos que cuando recibimos los sacramentos a través del sacerdote este es la persona de Jesús quien actúa en nuestras vidas. El poder y la gracia de los sacramentos siempre vienen de Jesús. Esto es una realidad importante para integrar y es una responsabilidad importante en la vida como sacerdotes.

Como sacerdotes, necesitamos reconocer que somos llamados a ser

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¡Recuerda rezar por nuestros sacerdotes, diáconos, religiosos, religiosas y seminaristas!

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En los últimos años, los sacerdotes de nuestra diócesis se han reunido anualmente para la convocación. Esta reunión fue originalmente el resultado de sesiones de escucha diocesana y del plan estratégico pastoral. La esperanza de la convocación es permitir a nuestros sacerdotes dedicar tiempo juntos en renovación, conversación, oración y formación continua. Mi deseo es compartir con ustedes algunos de los frutos de mi experiencia de nuestra reciente convocación anual 2020. Además, espero que puedan tomar algunos de estos pensamientos y aplicarlos en sus propias vidas.

En nuestro primer día, la meta fue mirar el año pasado desde la última convocación en el 2019. Reflexionar en el pasado ayuda a ubicarnos a nosotros mismo en medio de algunos desbarajustes de la vida y clarificarnos dónde hemos estado y dónde Dios ha estado trabajando en nuestras vidas.

Durante el curso del año, muchas cosas pasan, y podemos olvidar las cosas buenas que Dios ha hecho en nuestras vidas, así como también los desafíos que hemos vencido.

En la mañana del segundo día, reflexionamos sobre nuestras experiencias de desacuerdos. Sin duda has experimentado desacuerdos durante el año pasado. Lo que hacemos con los desacuerdos es lo más importante. Podemos permitir que los desacuerdos se conviertan en despreciables lo cual roba nuestra alegría y nos amarga, o podemos tomar los desacuerdos y usarlos en una oportunidad para profundizar más. El desacuerdo es una fuerza poderosa que revela dónde están nuestros corazones donde podemos seguir madurando y profundizando.

En la tarde del segundo día, reflexionamos en la realidad del sacerdote en persona Christi capitis.

Esto es el entendimiento de que el sacerdote, especialmente cuando

la persona de Jesús para otros. Como sacerdotes, debemos reconocer la persona de Jesús que viene a nosotros de una manera única en el ministerio de nuestros hermanos sacerdotes, pero también las maneras que Jesús viene a nosotros en los demás. Como personas de fe, necesitamos reconocer la persona de Jesús que viene a nosotros particularmente en el ministerio de nuestros sacerdotes, pero también en las maneras que Jesús viene a nosotros a través del otro.

10 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

En la mañana del tercer día, reflexionamos sobre cómo deseamos estar en compañía de Jesucristo. Si somos fieles al continuo discernimiento y crecimiento espiritual, estamos confiados en que llegaremos al lugar en nuestras vidas y espiritualmente donde reconocemos a Jesús como nuestro acompañante constante en la jornada de la vida. Como sacerdotes y como miembros de fieles laicos, necesitamos recordar este desafío continuo para crecer en la madurez espiritual con el Señor, entregándole nuestra vida constantemente.

En la tarde del tercer día, reflexionamos sobre la fraternidad entre los sacerdotes. Cada sacerdote vive como parte del “presbiterado”, cuerpo colectivo de sacerdotes en una diócesis particular. Cada sacerdote es ordenado dentro de una estructura de apoyo de hermanos sacerdotes quienes están ahí para apoyarlo y proveerlo.

Sin embargo, ningún conjunto de seres humanos es perfecto, y el presbiterado no es diferente. Así como en la familia los miembros tienen desacuerdos, los hermanos sacerdotes tienen desacuerdos. Sin embargo, así como en las familias sanan las heridas, los sacerdotes también desean sanar heridas entre el presbiterado. ¡La convocación fue otra vez una experiencia maravillosa! Me recuerda que tenemos sacerdotes que sirven en nuestra diócesis, y nuestra fraternidad y unidad como sacerdotes es fuerte y se hace más fuerte. En el breve curso de estos cuatro días, nuestros sacerdotes pudieron descansar, rezar y dedicar tiempo libre necesario para estar unos con otros. Espero que hayas notado un cambio gozoso en tu párroco antes de haber leído este artículo. Espero que esta reflexión te sea útil así como lo fue nuestra convocación para nuestros sacerdotes. ¡Recuerda rezar por nuestros sacerdotes, diáconos, religiosos, religiosas y seminaristas! BC

Binh luan bang loi

Linh mục đoàn trong giáo phận hăng say; tình huynh đệ và đoàn kết cao chính Chúa Giêsu tác động trong anh chị em. Sức mạnh và ơn thánh của bí tích luôn luôn phát ra từ Chúa Giêsu. Điều đó rất quan trọng để chúng tôi thích nghi mục vụ và sống đời linh mục trọn vẹn.

Là những linh mục chúng tôi cần nhận ra rằng mình được kêu gọi thay mặt Chúa phục vụ người khác. Là những linh mục

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Luôn nhớ cầu nguyện cho quý cha, phó tế, tu sĩ nam nữ và chủng sinh.

Bản dịch tiếng Việt do cha Lê Thành Tài.

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Mấy năm vừa qua linh mục đoàn giáo phận họp thường niên như hội nghị mục vụ. Họp thường niên này ngay từ đầu là thành quả qua sự lắng nghe và hoạch định phương pháp mục vụ mới. Kỳ vọng trong thời gian họp thường niên linh mục đoàn là dịp gặp gỡ với tinh thần đổi mới, thân hữu, cầu nguyện và trao dồi thêm.

Tôi hy vọng chia sẻ với anh chị em một số kinh nghiệm mà tôi nhận được lần họp linh mục đoàn năm nay, 2020. Hơn nữa, anh chị em có thể rút ra ít bài học từ chúng tôi và áp dụng cho đời sống của mình.

Mục đích ngày đầu tiên của chúng tôi là suy tư lại những ngày họp thường niên năm rồi. Suy tư lại giúp chúng tôi nhìn ra vị trí của mình giữa muôn vàn thử thách của cuộc sống và định rõ vị trí mà mình đã lọt vào và đã dành cho Chúa chỗ đứng nào trong đời sống tu trì. Qua một năm nhiều chuyện đã xảy ra, và có thể làm chúng ta quên đi những điều tốt mà Chúa đã thực hiện trong đời sống của mình, cũng như bao nhiêu thử thách khác mà mình đã lướt thắng được.

Sáng hôm sau, chúng tôi suy tư về những chuyện đã xảy ra ngoài ý muốn.

Khỏi phải nói anh chị em cũng có nhiều kinh nghiệm ngoài ý muốn trong năm rồi. Chúng ta giải quyết chúng như thế nào mới là điều đáng quan tâm. Chúng ta để chúng chi phối để rồi lấy mất đi niềm vui và làm cho mình thêm đắng cay, hay mình lợi dụng sự việc ngoài ý muốn đó như là cơ hội tốt đào sâu đức tin. Chuyện ngoài ý muốn là sức mạnh giúp ta thấy rõ con tim của mình để rồi thay đổi và tiến đức.

Ngay chiều hôm đó chúng tôi suy tư về căn tính linh mục là persona Christi capitis (căn tính linh mục là đầu nhiệm thể). Đây chính là sự hiểu biết về căn tính linh mục, đặc biệt khi cử hành bí tích, các linh mục đứng “vào vị trí của chính Chúa Giêsu là đầu.” Khi hiểu được điều này thì ta biết rằng mỗi lần lãnh nhận các bí tích qua bàn tay linh mục là

chúng tôi cũng cần nhận ra rằng chính Chúa Giêsu cũng đến với chúng tôi cách riêng qua bàn tay mục vụ của các linh mục khác, như Ngài cũng đến với anh chị em qua bàn tay người khác. Là cộng đồng dân Chúa anh chị em cần nhận ra rằng Chúa Giêsu đến với anh chị em

cách riêng qua bàn tay mục vụ của các linh mục, cũng như qua bàn tay người khác nữa.

Sáng ngày thứ ba chúng tôi suy tư về làm sao mình luôn mong muốn cùng đồng hành với Chúa Giêsu Kytô. Nếu mình luôn quan tâm suy tư và tiến đức thì chúng ta tin rằng mình sẽ đạt được một chỗ đứng ̣đạo đức rồi mình sẽ nhận ra Chúa Giêsu luôn đồng hành với mình trong cuộc sống. Là những linh mục cũng như anh em là phần tử trong cộng đồng cần nhắc nhở chính mình rằng thử thách tiến đức với Chúa đòi hỏi sự tín thác vào Ngài.

Chiều ngày thứ ba chúng tôi suy tư về tình huynh đệ trong phạm vi linh mục đoàn. Mỗi linh mục là một phần trong cộng đồng linh mục, là linh mục đoàn trong một giáo phận riêng biệt. Mỗi linh mục khi được truyền chức thì được gia nhập linh mục đoàn đã có sẵn và quý linh mục đã chịu chức trước sẵn sàng giúp đỡ anh em linh mục mới chịu chức. Tuy nhiên, không một cộng đồng con người nào hoàn hảo, và đương nhiên linh mục cũng vậy thôi. Như các phần tử trong gia đình có bất hòa, anh em linh mục không ngoại lệ. Tuy nhiên, như các gia đình có sự hòa giải thì các ngài cũng mong muốn chữa lành các vết thương.

Họp mặt linh mục đoàn thường niên là kinh nghiệm tuyệt vời. Nó nhắc cho tôi thấy rằng chúng ta có các linh mục hăng say phục vụ trong giáo phận, và tình huynh đệ và đoàn kết cao và càng tăng.

Trong bốn ngày họp ngắn ngủi đó các cha được nghỉ ngơi, cầu nguyện và giải lao cùng với nhau. Tôi mong rằng anh chị em nhận ra sự vui tươi khác lạ trong giáo xứ trước khi đọc được bài chia sẻ này. Tôi mong rằng bài chia sẻ này giúp anh chị em thấy rõ ích lợi họp thường niên dành cho các linh mục. Luôn nhớ cầu nguyện cho quý cha, phó tế, tu sĩ nam nữ và chủng sinh. Bản dịch tiếng Việt do cha Lê Thành Tài. BC

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 11

Comment

Pope Francis praises charitable work of Knights of Columbus The Pope Speaks

Vatican City (CNA) - Pope Francis recently met Supreme Knight Carl A. Anderson and members of the Knights of Columbus supreme council, praising the organization’s charitable work in Rome and in defense of life.

“Today the Knights of Columbus continue their work of evangelical charity and fraternity in a variety of fields,” the pope said. “I think in particular of your faithful witness to the sacredness and dignity of human life, evident at both the local and national levels.”

He also noted the Knights’ dedication to aiding, “both materially and spiritually, those Christian communities in the Middle East that are suffering the effects of violence, war and poverty.”

“I thank all the members of your Order for seeing in our persecuted and displaced brothers and sisters of that region neighbors for whom you are a sign of God’s infinite love,” he said.

The administrative council of the Knights of Columbus was on a pilgrimage to Rome to mark 100 years of charitable activity in the Eternal City.

In his speech, Pope Francis noted the centenary of the group’s humanitarian aid in Rome, which started after World War I, at the invitation of Pope Benedict XV. “The Knights responded generously, establishing sports centers for youth that quickly became places for education, catechesis and the distribution of food and other essentials

Pope Francis with Carl A. Anderson in file photo 2017 so needed at that time,” he said, adding that through these activities they have been faithful to the vision of their founder, Venerable Michael McGivney.

Francis also praised the group for its “unswerving devotion to the Successor of Peter,” including through the Vicarius Christi fund, the annual proceeds of which are given to the pope for his personal charities.

“In our world, marked by divisions and inequalities, the generous commitment of your Order to serve all in need offers, especially to young people, an important inspiration to overcome a globalization of indifference and build together a more just and inclusive society,” he said.

Pope Francis also met with Carl

12 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Anderson in a separate private audience.

As head of the Knights of Columbus, Anderson is the chief executive officer and chairman of the board. He was elected supreme knight in 2000, and earlier served as supreme secretary and state deputy of the District of Columbia.

The Knights of Columbus, a Catholic fraternal order, was founded in New Haven, CT, in 1882 by Venerable Michael J. McGivney, a parish priest.

It has 1.8 million members worldwide who perform volunteer service and advance the order’s key principles of charity, unity, fraternity and patriotism. BC

Comment

Questions of Faith Father Glenn LeCompte

Holy Thursday washing of feet: Has something changed?

Last year when I went to Mass at my church parish on Holy Thursday some of the people whose feet were washed were women and children. I remember growing up that only men’s feet were washed. Has something changed?

The ritual of the washing of feet on Holy Thursday is a powerful liturgical symbol. It was practiced at times during the Middle Ages outside of Mass by some of the popes. In 1955, Pope Pius XII restored to the liturgy the ancient Holy Week rituals for Holy Thursday, Good Friday and Holy Saturday.

Among the restorations was the ritual of washing feet in imitation of Jesus, who at the Last Supper in John 13:115, washes his disciples’ feet. In their communication of the Holy Father’s decree to reinstate the foot-washing ritual, the Sacred Congregation for Rites instructed that when the ritual was done the faithful were to be instructed about Christ’s command of “brotherly love” and encouraged to be “generous in works of charity.”

In the account of the foot-washing in John’s Gospel Jesus teaches that true leadership is servant leadership. If he, whom they call “master” has humbled himself to serve his disciples, they in turn should humbly serve each other.

Jesus’ greatest act of service would be to die on the cross for the salvation of souls the next day.

In 1988, the Congregation for Divine Worship and Discipline of the Sacraments (CDWDS) reaffirmed the

earlier teaching about implementing the foot-washing in the Mass of the Lord’s Supper and stated that those who were to participate in the ritual were “chosen men.” The rubric in the third edition of the Roman Missal echoes the above instruction.

On Jan. 6, 2016, CDWDS issued the instruction “During the Mass of the Lord’s Supper” and communicated the decision of Pope Francis that the rubric which stated “The men who have been chosen are led by the ministers ... ” be changed to “Those who are chosen are led ... .” This change means that women could now be included among those chosen to have their feet washed. In addition, “During the Mass” explains that people young and old, healthy and sick, clerics, consecrated men and women and laity are appropriately chosen as participants in the foot-washing. The idea is that those chosen should be a cross-section of the various groups of people who comprise the parish. In addition, if a parish consists of people of various cultures, all cultures should be represented. The reason given for the change was “In order that the full meaning of this rite might be expressed to those who participate” (“During the Mass”).

Regarding the number of men who were to be chosen for the footwashing, parishes have often selected 12. This led many to think that the foot-washing was intended to be a

historical reenactment of Jesus’ act of washing the feet of his 12 apostles.

None of the instructions nor the rubrics in the Sacramentary or Roman Missal ever specified the number to be chosen. The practice of selecting 12 men has diverted attention from the true significance of the ritual. In a commentary on “During the Mass” the CDWDS explains, “The significance (of the foot-washing ritual) does not now relate so much to the exterior imitation of what Jesus has done, rather as to the meaning of what he has accomplished which has a universal importance, namely the giving of himself «to the end» for the salvation of the human race, his charity which embraces all people and which makes all people brothers and sisters by following his example.” Additionally, our imitation of Jesus’ action “... so that we might do as he has done goes beyond the physical washing of the feet of others to embrace everything that such a gesture expresses in service of the tangible love of our neighbour (“Explanatory Note on During the Mass,” CDWDS). BC

Readers are encouraged to send their questions to our local Bayou Catholic columnists by email to bayoucatholic@htdiocese.org.

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 13

Reflections

Christ is present in the Eucharist as food that gives and sustains our spiritual lives Readings Between the Lines Father Glenn LeCompte

In my February 2020 article I referred to the Pew Research study which drew attention to a strikingly low percentage of Catholics who believe in the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist. I suggested that one possible cause of this phenomenon could be a mindset posed by the scientific worldview that if something is not tangible and measurable it cannot be proven to exist. The Roman Catholic Church teaches that when the bread and wine are consecrated at Mass a change of “substance,” the underlying nature of the elements of bread and wine, occurs even though the elements retain the sensible properties of bread and wine.

But can we believe in such a change of substance if substance is not tangible to the senses?

In my January article I also quoted liturgist, Rev. Msgr. Kevin Irwin, who asserts that we should not have to choose between saying that Christ is really present in the Eucharist and the Eucharist is a “sign” of Christ’s presence.

At this point, I want to explore the idea of the “sign-quality” of the Eucharist.

Signs are tangible things which point to what is nonetheless real, but beyond the experience of the senses. Even with a scientific worldview we still accept the reality of abstract things such as justice. The online Merriam Webster Dictionary defines justice as “the maintenance or administration of what is just especially by the impartial adjustment of conflicting claims or the assignment of merited rewards or punishments” (https://www.

merriam-webster.com/ dictionary/justice).

When, for example, a property or monetary settlement is made between two parties the distribution of the property or money is not justice, but the sign of justice. Justice is the condition that exists because people have been given what is due them. The situation that was out of balance has been returned to a state of equilibrium.

In this case we have a sign, which we can experience with the senses, the distribution of money or property, which points to an abstract reality of justice.

The real presence of Christ in the Eucharist can be understood in a similar way to the relationship between justice and its signs. On a very fundamental level we would say that the sign of Christ’s presence is the consecrated bread and wine.

That the sign used to represent the presence of Christ is bread and wine says something in particular about that presence. Christ is present in the Eucharist as food that both gives and sustains our spiritual lives.

But the sign is really more than the consecrated bread and wine. The sign includes the action of offering the Eucharistic Prayer, including the words of consecration, and then the act of the liturgical assembly approaching the altar together and partaking of the sacred elements. By sharing this sacred meal together, we symbolize that we are Christ’s Body.

The idea of the visible sign and the hidden reality to which it points is rooted in Scripture, especially in the Gospel of John. Between chapters 2 and 11 Jesus performs several “signs.” For example, he changes water to wine at a wedding in Cana (2:1-11) and he feeds

14 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

a multitude with a meager amount of bread and fish (6:1-15). These acts of Jesus are signs that point to an abstract reality, his true identity. Jews practiced certain washing rituals to remedy spiritual impurity. Jesus’ change of the water to wine symbolizes that he is the source of true ritual purity. Done in the context of a wedding, the sign Jesus performs is meant to connote that in his presence in the world the time of the Messiah has come. What the feeding of the multitude points to is explained in Jesus’ dialog with the crowd which follows his performance of the sign (6:22-59). Whereas the crowd’s ancestors fed on manna provided by God in the desert, but they died, Jesus is the true bread which comes down from heaven and gives life to the world (6:32-33). Therefore, Jesus’ feeding of the multitude points to another aspect of his identity: he himself is food for eternal life. Again, we have an example of a visible sign (physical feeding of the multitude) which points to an abstract reality (Jesus is food for eternal life). Through our partaking of the eucharistic bread and wine, with an underlying faith that Christ is food for eternal life, we begin to experience such life here and now.

My point in this study is that even in our everyday world we accept the reality of a “sign-system.” Signs, which can be experienced through the senses, point to a deeper reality, which is

a

Reflections

not readily accessible by the senses.

There are some arbitrary symbols in our world which are given meaning.

Why, for example, does the red traffic light mean “stop” and the green one mean “go”? Could not other colors have been chosen? Certainly they could have, but the meaning of the red and green lights has significance for us because the reality to which they point (stopping or going) are commonly accepted and understood universally by people.

Other symbols are natural symbols.

By their very nature they point to what they represent. For example, if you came home and saw smoke billowing from your house’s windows and doors you would probably correctly conclude that your house is on fire! The sacraments make use of natural symbols, which by their very nature readily point to a reality that is not readily evident.

If you are feeling hungry as you drive down the road and see a sign

displaying a hamburger, you know that there is a good chance you are coming to a place where your hunger can be satisfied. In Jesus’ culture, bread and wine represented the staples of life, food which is necessary for human survival. In the eucharistic celebration, bread and wine, which already suggest nourishment, are used to point us to nourishment of a more significant kind, nourishment for eternal life. We must eat food to live. When we partake of the eucharistic banquet we are sharing in food that is necessary to sustain the eternal life into which we began to participate in baptism. The bread and wine, which on one level represent physical nourishment, are used sacramentally to represent sustenance for eternal life. John 6:54 reflects this idea when Jesus says, “Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life ... .”

Having reflected on the sign-quality of the Eucharist, in my next article I

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will specifically explore Paul’s recalling for the Corinthians Jesus’ command to his followers to gather and share a meal in his memory. BC

Reflection Questions

v What are the “signs” (or symbols) of love between two people? Why is love something that transcends words, physical actions and emotions? v What are some other examples of sensible things that represent or point to things that we accept as real, but cannot experience with our senses? v Without resorting to the argument that we just “accept it on faith,” how would you explain to others that it is reasonable to believe that Jesus Christ makes his saving presence available to us in the Eucharist?

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Scripture Readings and a listing of Feast days and saints

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

1 March

2

3

4

5

6

7

First Sunday of Lent Genesis 2:7-9; 3:1-7 Romans 5:12-19 Matthew 4:1-11

Lenten Weekday Leviticus 19:1-2, 11-18 Matthew 25:31-46

8

9

Second Sunday of Lent Genesis 12:1-4a 2 Timothy 1:8b-10 Matthew 17:1-9

15

Lenten Weekday Daniel 9:4b-10 Luke 6:36-38

16

Lenten Weekday Third Sunday of 2 Kings 5:1-15b Lent Luke 4:24-30 Exodus 17:3-7 Romans 5:1-2, 5-8

22 Fourth Sunday of Lent 1 Samuel 16:1b, 6-7, 10-13a Ephesians 5:8-14 John 9:1-41

29 Fifth Sunday of Lent Ezra 37:12-14 Romans 8:8-11 John 11:1-45

23 Lenten Weekday Isaiah 65:17-21 John 4:43-54

30 Lenten Weekday Daniel 13:1-9, 1517, 19-30, 33-62 John 8:1-11

Lenten Weekday Isaiah 55:10-11 Matthew 6:7-15

Lenten Weekday Jonah 3:1-10 Luke 11:29-32

10

11

Lenten Weekday Isaiah 1:10, 16-20 Matthew 23:1-12

Lenten Weekday Jeremiah 18:18-20 Matthew 20:17-28

17

18

Lenten Weekday Daniel 3:25, 34-43 Matthew 18:21-35

24 Lenten Weekday Ezra 47:1-9, 12 John 5:1-16

31 Lenten Weekday Numbers 21:4-9 John 8:21-30

16 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Lenten Weekday Deuteronomy 4:1, 5-9 Matthew 5:17-19

25

Lenten Weekday Esther C:12, 14-16, 23-25 Matthew 7:7-12

12 Lenten Weekday Jeremiah 17:5-10 Luke 16:19-31

19 Solemnity of Saint Joseph, spouse of the Blessed Virgin Mary 2 Samuel 7:4-5a, 12-14a, 16 Romans 4:13, 1618, 22 Matthew 1:16, 18-21, 24a 26

Lenten Weekday Solemnity of the Annunciation of the Exodus 32:7-14 John 5:31-47 Lord Isaiah 7:10-14; 8:10 Hebrews 10:4-10 Luke 1:26-38

Lenten Weekday: Day of Abstinence Ezekiel 18:21-28 Matthew 5:20-26

Lenten Weekday Deuteronomy 26:16-19 Matthew 5:43-48

13

14

Lenten Weekday: Day of Abstinence Genesis 37:3-4, 12-13a, 17b-28a Matthew 21:33-43, 45-46

Lenten Weekday Micah 7:14-15, 18-20 Luke 15:1-3, 11-32

20

21

Lenten Weekday: Day of Abstinence Hosea 14:2-10 Mark 12:28-34

27 Lenten Weekday: Day of Abstinence Wisdom 2:1a, 12-22 John 7:1-2, 10, 25-30

Lenten Weekday Hosea 6:1-6 Luke 18:9-14

28 Lenten Weekday Jeremiah 11:18-20 John 7:40-53

March

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Catholic Schools

Educators conference The annual diocesan educators conference was held recently at Vandebilt Catholic High School in Houma.

Very Rev. Simon Peter Engurait, V.G., was the celebrant of the Mass.

Keynote speaker was Michael Zelenka from the University of Notre Dame in Indiana.

Photos by Lawrence Chatagnier

18 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

The collection will be held March 21 and 22, 2020 Thank you for your generosity.

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 19

Special

Rise Up! Christ the Redeemer Church in Thibodaux held its second annual Rise Up! Men’s Gathering recently. Rise Up! was born from the desire to give men the opportunity to come together as a community and realize that they are not alone. In today’s world, it can be easy for men especially to fall into the trap of believing they need to have all the answers and go through life on their own. Rise Up! breaks away from that norm, inviting men to acknowledge their need for God and their need for one another.

The one-day gathering began with a Mass celebrated by Bishop Shelton J. Fabre.

During the day, three keynote speakers presented dynamic presentations to the near 200 men in attendance. Keynote speakers included two priests from our diocese, Father Andre’ Melancon and Father Mitchel Semar, as well as Father Vinny Fortunato, a Capuchin Friar from New Jersey. After each presentation, the men were invited into a time of prayer and reflection by Very Rev. Mark Toups, V.G. Several other priests were in attendance, generously giving of their time to participants, including Bishop Emeritus Sam G. Jacobs, Father Wilmer Todd, Father Paul Birdsall and Father Prentice Tipton Jr. The sacrament of confession was available throughout the entire day, allowing men the opportunity to experience God’s gifts of mercy and freedom. The sense of community at Rise Up! was tangibly evident as men expressed gratitude for the day and relief in knowing they are not alone.

20 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Special

Photos by Lawrence Chatagnier March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 21

Heavenly Recipes

Hannah Arceneaux

Hannah Cooks a:

VEGETARIAN MEAL Story and Photos by Lawrence Chatagnier

Broccoli Casserole INGREDIENTS: Shredded cheddar cheese 1 can cream of mushroom soup 2 blocks frozen broccoli florets 1 onion, chopped 3/4 cup rice 1 block butter

DIRECTIONS: This month’s heavenly recipe, broccoli casserole, comes from Hannah Arceneaux, a parishioner of St. Hilary of Poitiers Church in Mathews and the religious coordinator, general music teacher for grades K-3 and choir director of St. Joseph Catholic Elementary School in Thibodaux. In addition to teaching at St. Joseph, she is the music coordinator and a choir director at St. Hilary where she plays the piano and sings. She schedules the choirs, choir rehearsals, works with the youth band, the children’s choir and adult choir.

Hannah, a vegetarian, says that she has never had the desire to eat meat. “The broccoli casserole is a recipe that my mom makes. It has been handed down from the family. When I was a child my mom would always cook a regular meal for the family and prepare a meatless portion for me on the side. To this day I’m not a big eater. I could live on salad. I also enjoy canned vegetables.”

Music has always been a part of Hannah’s life. She recalls her love for music at a very young age. “I started by playing the piano. I was very shy as a child. My mother would encourage me to sing, however I didn’t know I had a singing voice because I was too afraid to use it. My grandmother would always ask me to get close and sing in her ear. The first time I sang in front of a group was at my grandmother’s funeral.”

Shortly after her grandmother’s funeral, when Hannah was 15 years old, she began singing at St. Hilary. She has been singing there ever since.

Hannah took piano lessons when she was five years old and continued until she graduated from high school. She began taking voice lessons in the 10th grade and continued through college where she graduated from Nicholls State University in Thibodaux with a degree in music (concentration vocal 22 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Defrost and drain broccoli. Cook rice on the side.

Sauté onion and block of butter. Add broccoli. Cook until soft. Then add can of cream of mushroom soup and a handful of cheddar cheese. Mix well. Add rice.

Lastly, place in a baking dish and add cheddar cheese on top. Place in 350 degree oven long enough to melt cheese.

performance). “I played the saxophone in the school band. I also played the violin in a community orchestra. I still sing occasionally with the Symphony Chorus of New Orleans.”

Hannah loves teaching the students music at St. Joseph. “It is wonderful. Music itself is an awesome universal language. It brings the students so much joy that in turn brings me joy. The kids love to sing and dance. They all love to sing. They are not afraid. There’s no holding back. It’s beautiful.”

The teacher, who loves to travel, has a special fondness for lighthouses. “I have traveled to Maine and visited the Portland Head Light, a lighthouse within Fort Williams National Park. I find much symbolism in my faith in God who is my guiding light, and lighthouses. Just as God guides us in our faith, lighthouses guide Mariners with its guiding light. There are many lighthouses which have stood the test of time, which to me is very symbolic of God.” BC

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 23

March For Life

Marching for a Emily Adams

The March for Life was truly an amazing experience. I know, once you hear you are taking a bus it sounds miserable, but if I’m being honest, it really wasn’t. On the trip our thing was “offer it up” … offer up your sufferings for others. I really encourage everyone to go on this trip because I promise you will benefit from it and have so much fun in the process. The things that really impacted me the most: 1) The National Arlington CemeteryThere are so many tombstones that it looks like never ending dominos.

You really get to see how many people have died to save us, and those people are the reason we live in a free country today. You can think about how big the number 400,000 is, but you won’t realize actually how big it is until you see over 400,000 veteran graves.

2) Another huge impact was the actual March for Life. The whole week leading up to the March, I kept hearing “Okay, there is going to be a lot of people, probably over 600,000” and we would be like “Wow, that’s a big number.” Once again, you can’t imagine how big it actually is until you see it in person. When I was marching and we got to the top of the hill, Miss Russo said, “Turn around and look.” It was breathtaking how many people were behind me. Over 600,000 became more than just a number, and I can’t say I’ve ever seen so many people in one place.

I’m so grateful for the opportunity and it was an amazing experience that I hope everyone gets to experience one day.

Emily Adams, 11th grade Central Catholic School Morgan City

Guest Columnist Kimberly Russo

One hundred fifty youth and adults from the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux traveled to Washington, D.C., to participate in this year’s March for Life. The group consisted of 100 youth and 50 adults including Bishop Shelton J. Fabre, seven priests and seven seminarians traveling on four busses.

According to Amanda Garcia, who coordinated the March for Life pilgrimage for the diocesan Office of Vocations, this year’s overall theme was “I am.” Every morning on each bus, group leaders would oversee ice breakers, discussions and activities about the theme of the day, which was related to the overall theme. Each of the stops made along the journey were specifically tied to the overall theme in some way.

Following is a schedule of the events that took place during the six-day trip with the theme for each day. n Monday, Jan. 20 I am called Arrive at the diocesan Pastoral Center in Schriever Mass at 6:30 a.m.

Depart Compline (night prayer) with the Nashville Dominican Nuns Sleep on Bus n Tuesday, Jan. 21 I am unique Arrive at Arlington Cemetery Witness the “Changing of Guards”; Houma-Thibodaux presents wreath

24 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

National Museum of African American History and Culture Mass at Camp Wabanna n Wednesday, Jan. 22 I am valuable Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception: Mass celebrated by Bishop Shelton J. Fabre National Museum of National History Memorial Walk (Vietnam War, Lincoln, Korean War, MLK, FDR) Adoration at Camp Wabanna n Thursday, Jan. 23 I am meaningful Geaux Forth Rally Holocaust Museum Mass at St. Vincent de Paul Catholic Church Life is Very Good Evening of Prayer and Worship Camp Wabanna n Friday, Jan. 24 I am sacrificial March for Life Depart for Home Sleep on Bus n Saturday, Jan. 25 I am sent Mass at St. Patrick Catholic Church in Meridian, MS: The Knights of Columbus treated us to an amazing breakfast.

Arrive back at Pastoral Center For the first day, the theme was “I am called.” What better way to see this lived out than through the Nashville Dominicans? It was such a treat to spend the first night of the pilgrimage with them. By chance, we actually arrived to the motherhouse earlier than expected. Since we did arrive early, they treated us to tours, and a question and answer panel. Through their vocational stories, we were truly able to see what it means to be called

by God in such a radical way.

a

March For Life

culture of life We then joined them for Compline (night prayer). It was an honor to pray with them. It truly set the prayerful tone for the entire trip.

The theme for the second day was “I am unique.” After leaving Arlington Cemetery, we headed to the National African American Museum. Shortly after arriving, my group of students and I came across a quote by Nelson Mandela that read, “I cherish my own freedom dearly, but I care even more for your freedom.” Following the theme of pro-life, we felt inspired by Mandela’s words. Here we were reading all of the horrors done to the African American community, but there were people like Mandela caring for others around him more than himself. That is why we march. Because life was chosen for us, and it is out of love we march for those who cannot. God created each of us in his image and likeness, and that consequently makes us beautifully unique. No matter the ethnicity, human life is a treasure that should be respected by all.

The theme for the third day was “I am valuable.” Wednesday was a long day. There was a bunch of walking involved, and when we got back to Camp Wabanna, everyone was hungry and exhausted. After everyone enjoyed a delicious dinner, we gathered together in prayer. It is always a powerful experience to enter into prayer and worship with so many high school students. It was so heartwarming to witness their love and devotion for Christ through adoration. It was so evident seeing how the pilgrimage was bringing the group together and closer to Christ through prayer and sacrifice.

The theme for the fourth day was “I am meaningful.” It was a pleasant delight being in a room surrounded by people from the great state of Louisiana for the Geaux Forth Rally. We heard from a woman who was the survivor

of two failed abortion attempts. It was both an eye opening and powerful experience to hear how she survived the great horrors of abortion. Now speaking around the world, she is such a beautiful advocate at why life matters. Her life is meaningful.

The theme for the fifth day was “I am sacrificial.” Unless you have been on the March, there really are no words to describe the enormity of it. As we all filed in line, everywhere you looked there were people occupying the space.

There were people everywhere praying, singing and chanting pro-life messages.

Adults, children, infants, men, women, everyone showed up Friday, Jan. 24 to March for a purpose. There is nothing more heartwarming than to see people of different ages, genders and races come together in the hope of reversing the great evil of abortion. We often hear about great separation within our country, but on the day of the March none of that was present. I left the March feeling very hopeful.

This was my first time traveling to the March for Life with the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux, and I, like many, went into it with the thought, “Why in the world aren’t we flying?” After returning from the trip, I get it. The busses truly transform into moving retreat centers. We would have missed out on so much had we flown. From testimonies from the religious and the laity to the small group discussions, we dove deep into our faith, our struggles, our strengths, and so much more. I never thought spending over 60 hours on the bus would be enjoyable, but I honestly cannot wait until next year.

Because what do we want? A culture of life. And how do we get it? Prayer and sacrifice.

(Kimberly Russo, pilgrimage group leader, is an 8th and 10th grade religion and P.E. teacher at Central Catholic School in Morgan City.) BC

Bria Romero

The trip has impacted my life so much. Looking back today, I realize how much I’ve learned. I went into this trip thinking it was going to be easy. I didn’t realize how spoiled I was for the things I have. I then realized how much we had to offer up. We didn’t have hot water to shower in, we didn’t get the foods we wanted, we had to wake up early, and we had to do whatever was on the schedule. Making new friends and meeting new people was a really good part of the whole trip. It was a lot of walking and sacrificing, but it was all worth it. We focused mostly on Jesus, which is one thing I don’t do nearly enough. Getting to experience museums and the monuments were so amazing. Getting to see the different churches and getting to meet so many nuns had to be the best part. When getting to the March, I didn’t know what to expect. I thought it was going to be so different than what it really was. We said the rosary as we walked for the unborn. This trip has definitely brought me closer to God. Bria Romero, 10th grade Central Catholic School Morgan City

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 25

March For Life

Katie Luc

Hallie Crappel

I had the opportunity to attend the annual March for Life and I have to admit that I was very skeptical about it in the beginning.

I knew from previous people that have gone on this pilgrimage that it would, in fact, be a pilgrimage rather than a vacation—spending over 60 hours on a bus in total, long nights and early mornings, and encountering over 100s of 1,000s of people. However, I believe this pilgrimage has impacted me more than anything else could have, and I feel extremely blessed that I was able to attend. I really enjoyed every single part of this trip— from the museums, to talking to the religious, to the March itself. However, there was one big eye opener that stood out to me—while visiting the Holocaust Museum on the fourth day. It was heartbreaking to realize how many people had suffered. While walking through, we were able to relive the lives of the people at this time. As I’m sure you know, the Holocaust is considered one of the largest mass genocides in history being that over six million Jews were killed over a period of years.

More than 61 million babies have been aborted, yet you don’t hear about abortions as much as you do the Holocaust—while both share similarities. The people involved are both people, with a soul, human dignity, and a heartbeat given to them specifically by God at the moment of conception. The 56 million difference truly struck me as the reason we would be marching … for the gift of life.

Katie Luc, 11th grade Central Catholic School Morgan City

Day five – We heard the first president to attend the March for Life speak. It was so moving to see so many people marching for the same cause. The word for day five was sacrificial. Sacrifice is basically doing something you don’t want to do, but doing it for a purpose. On day five we were all exhausted but we walked anyway because we knew it was for something bigger than ourselves This whole experience was beyond words for me. The whole trip was so jam packed with laughter, struggles and the presence of Jesus. Every day was a new learning experience.

I really just thought the March was walking down a street and chanting pro-life messages, but it was so much more. The places we went and monuments we saw were amazing, but the spiritual part was priceless. We went to Mass every day, learned morning and night prayer, went to rallies, and really just had a lot of time to think about life. In six days, I feel like I’ve changed so much spiritually. The struggles like having a freezing cold shower every night, having to sleep on the floor of the bus, not having kneelers for adoration, or being exhausted 24/7 taught me so much. Miss Russo constantly told us to “offer it up” and so that’s what we did. We found the joy in the struggles and that’s priceless.

I’ve learned so much from this trip. All I have to say is go. Go whenever you get the opportunity and experience the struggles, the new friendships, and the museums and monuments. Learn the truth of being pro-life. I can truly say it was worth every second.

Hallie Crappel, 10th grade Central Catholic School Morgan City

26 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 27

Special

Mary’s Manor A gift to God’s family Story by Janet Marcel Photos by Lawrence Chatagnier Officials of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux recently announced that the children of the late Al and Mary Danos – Marcel, René Danos David, Alyce and André representing the Mary & Al Danos Family Foundation, have donated their parents’ home to the diocese.

The house, which is located at 15533 East Main Street off of Highway 308 in Cut Off, sits on approximately three acres of land and is 5,670 square feet with five bedrooms, five bathrooms, tennis courts and a swimming pool, reports Jimmie Danos, diocesan director of the Office of Building and Construction.

Construction began in 1976 and the Danos family moved in to the house in 1977 when Marcel was six and René was four. René says her parents had a strict budget of $300,000 for the house and they stuck to that budget. Clifton Cheramie was the main contractor and Duel Martin Sr., the children’s maternal grandfather helped build the home, but Al Danos drove the first and the last piling under the house.

While attending a Vandebilt Catholic High School baseball game last spring, René says she overheard someone who had just come from a diocesan meeting saying that there was some discussion about needing a place to 28 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

house some of its retired priests in the future. René says she thought to herself she might just have a solution to that problem.

René initially contacted the Catholic Foundation of South Louisiana about the feasibility of her idea, then she met with Bishop Shelton J. Fabre to further discuss the details.

The Danos children feel that donating the house to the diocese is in keeping with the wishes of their parents in that their parents’ will stated the proceeds from the sale of the house were to go to the Mary & Al Danos Family Foundation.

After putting the house on the market but not finding the right buyer, René explains that she asked their attorney if donating it was an option. The house is located on a stretch of land belonging to the Danos family, which actually shares a driveway with her uncle’s home, so they felt that donating to the diocese would be a good fit.

The name Mary’s Manor, after Mrs. Al (Mary M.) Danos, was given to the home by the family.

René says her family is committed to helping with the upkeep of the home for the next several years through their foundation. “We discussed a yearly grant to help

a

Special

with maintenance of the home. We know having an older and riding horses on the farm.” home comes with its daily challenges, and wear and Alyce says, “I spent my entire life in the home, even as an tear. Also, we want to make sure long time employee, Mr. adult, where my parents helped me raise my daughter, Ana; Joe Leblanc, who has worked for my parents for over 25 it was the only home we ever knew. My whole heart and years and knows the ends and outs of the home, could help soul resided there, up until the very end.” the diocese run the house.”

Feeding apple slices to the horses every afternoon with Over $9,000 was raised through #iGiveCatholic 2019 her Tutu (grandfather Al) in his golf cart and helping to buy furnishings for the house. Also, René adds that Grandmary in her garden are some of Ana Alyce Wilson’s Andrea Bollinger-Giardina’s daughters Erica Guidry and fondest memories of growing up in the house.

Misty Boudreaux recently sold their mother’s condo in New “When deciding what to do with the home, I believe God Orleans and have generously donated all of the furniture to put me in the right place at the right time to hear one of the Mary’s Manor. Bollinger-Giardina, who died in July 2019, needs of our diocese,” says René. “I often think about how was good friends with Mary Danos.

God’s plan was perhaps to donate the house all along. Our According to Jon J. Toups, chief operating & financial parents always opened their home to the priests at Sacred officer for the diocese, the house will be utilized for a much Heart Church parish in Cut Off. They were part of our needed dual purpose – as a diocesan south Lafourche family. I can still see Msgr. (Francis) Legendre on the back presence and meeting facility, as well as a facility to of my brother’s bike holding on for dear life. Father Tommy accommodate our diocesan priests. “We want to be able to (Bouterie) showing up at the back door in a Halloween offer a state of the art retirement housing facility for any of costume, Father Dean (Danos) and Sister Claire (Rodrigue, our priests who want that. In the future, we hope to offer C.I.C.,) stopping by for a visit, Father Benie (Sabino a form of a more well-rounded and comprehensive elderly Rebosuro) coming by to play tennis, then hopping a ride care, retirement living and benefits offering, the likes of St. Joseph Manor in Thibodaux and Notre Dame in New in the golf cart with my children, and Father Greg (Fratt) Orleans. In the meantime, we will actually be opening up riding horses with my son, Luke; and doing a swan dive into the facility for our current priests to go down and enjoy the the pool. So you see, this decision was so natural and easy property for lodging, swimming, tennis and even fishing for because our parents made the priests of our diocese family. a restful and relaxing place to enjoy their day off or vacation So to me, the home is still with family … God’s family.” time,” says Toups.

René says she knows her parents are very pleased with René says some of her fondest memories of living in the their decision to donate the house to the Diocese of Houmahouse were their family gatherings. “Christmas was always Thibodaux. BC at our house. And in the summertime, we were always outside playing and swimming with friends and family.”

However, René says her all-time favorite memory was actually a few years back when she and her husband were having their own house remodeled. “The construction was getting to me, so my son Eli and I moved back in with my dad for five months. It brought back so many memories of my childhood. Daddy and I would talk about me having flashbacks of growing up there and just reliving some of those moments of being in that place of love, security and happiness.”

Marcel Danos says some of his favorite memories growing up were “the good times spent with our family, family gatherings around Christmas dinners, tennis matches with family and friends, playing in the pool, playing football in yard with siblings, cousins, and our quarterback Uncle Hank; and also, working as a teenager in the yard and on the farm, The Danos siblings, Marcel, Alyce, Andre and René, are pictured with Bishop Shelton J. Fabre at Mary’s Manor. raising and showing cattle for 4-H, March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 29

Youth

in action Katie Luc

School: Central Catholic High School, Morgan City Grade: 11th Church parish: Scared Heart, Morgan City Describe your family unit: Gwendolyn, mother; Kerry, father; Kerrilyn, sister Favorite Hobby: Volleyball Favorite Movie: Secretariat Favorite T.V. Show: The Office Favorite Genre of Music: All types

What are you doing to stengthen your relationship with Christ this Lenten season? What are some ways you can be a role model and leader for other youth at your school?

Every Lenten season, I try to do at least one thing to strengthen my relationship with Christ. I believe that these 40 days can be used to grow spiritually as people of God. This year, I plan to do multiple things in order to grow closer to God. Every week, I will attend adoration on Tuesdays in the chapel at church on the campus of Central Catholic School. I also will strive to say one rosary a week. These will be a prayer of intercession with the intention of someone or something in particular. I also plan to do extra

service for different groups in our area.

While in school, it is very important to be a good leader by doing the right thing at school. This includes being respectful to all people, communicating with all people around you, and participating in religious activities in and out of school. However, I believe the true test of character can be found outside of the classrooms and off of the school campus. This is when being a leader becomes a greater task. I strive to embody a certain character that is admirable to others. One simple thing

30 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

to do is to invite people who do not normally go to Mass every weekend to attend. By attending religious events, like Steubenville and the March for Life, I hope that it can encourage others to do the same. I am also a member of Central Catholic’s campus ministry team, which gives me the opportunity to be able to help others and lead them to Christ through retreats and prayer.

Through all of these things, I hope to lead others to Christ through my example. BC

Seminarian Education Burses What is a seminarian burse/endowment fund?

A seminarian burse/endowment fund is an invested sum of money where the interest is used in perpetuity to help fund the education of men to the priesthood in the Diocese of HoumaThibodaux.

How does someone establish a seminarian burse/endowment fund?

Very simply, a burse/endowment fund may be established and

named for anyone you choose, be it family, friend, bishop, priest, deacon, religious, etc.

Who do I contact to contribute to or establish a fund?

To contribute to or establish a burse/endowment fund, send funds to the Pastoral Center, Attn: Catholic Foundation, P.O. Box 505, Schriever, LA 70395 or contact the Catholic Foundation office at 985-850-3116 or aponson@htdiocese.org for more information.

Completed Burses and CFSL Named Endowment Funds

January 2020 Burse Contributions

Note: Numbers stipulate the amount of completed burses.*

Anonymous Mr. & Mrs. C. Thomas Bienvenu Harry Booker Bishop Warren L. Boudreaux (3)* Mr. Eledier Broussard Rev. Adrian J. Caillouet Rev. James Louis Caillouet Bishop L. Abel Caillouet Judge & Mrs. L.P. Caillouet Msgr. Lucien J. Caillouet Abdon J. & Ada B. Callais Harold & Gloria Callais Family Paul A. Callais Peter W. Callais Vincent & Fannie Cannata Minor Sr. & Lou Ella Cheramie Maude & Edith Daspit Mr. & Mrs. Caliste Duplantis family (3)* Clay Sr. & Evelida Duplantis C. Remie Duplantis Marie Elise Duplantis Warren J. Harang Jr. Msgr. Raphael C. Labit Msgr. Francis J. Legendre Rev. Charles Menard Dr. & Mrs. M.V. Marmande & Family Donald Peltier Sr. (3)* Harvey Peltier (30)*

Richard Peltier The Peltier Foundation (5) Orleans & Louella Pitre Msgr. Joseph Wester Robert R. Wright Jr. Rev. Kermit Trahan St. Bernadette Men’s Club Diocesan Knights of Columbus Leighton Delahaye Mrs. Shirley Conrad Bishop Shelton J. Fabre Elizabeth Hebert Callais Family Fund Rev. Joseph Tu Tran Society of St. Joseph (2) Endowment Fund - $119,136.90 James J Buquet Jr. Julius & Marie Pauline St. Amant Elie & Dot Klingman Bishop Sam Jacobs Endowment-$32,840.43 Giardina Family Foundation Sem. Endowment-$4,337.62 James J. Buquet, Jr. Family Sem. Endowment-$27,979.95 Diocesan Seminarian Endowment-$3,502,699.11

Mary and Al Danos Foundation Sem. Endowment-$38,621.30 Msgr. Amedee Sem. Endowment-$314,838.43 The Peltier Foundation-$14,482.97 Leo & Ethel Hebert Jane and John Dean Sidney J. & Lydie C. Duplantis Msgr. Stanislaus Manikowski Leon “Ponoke” and Marlene Champagne Sem. Endowment-$2,225.00 Society of St. Joseph, Husband of Mary-$100 Father Patrick Riviere Sem. Endowment-$27,018.24 Parker Conrad Sem. Education-$15.000.00 Father Brett Lapeyrouse Sem. Education-$3,000.00 Mr. and Mrs. Joseph J. Cefalu, Sr. Sem. Edowment-$1,000.00 Lena “Bobbie” Sere’ Sem. Fund-$500 Mary Timothy Everett Sem. Fund-$500 Viola Ann Wallace Vosbein Memorial Sem. Burse-$1,000.00

Joseph Waitz Sr..........................$500.00 Mr. & Mrs. George C. Fakier .....................$200.00 Msgr. William Koninkx ..........$200.00 Dean Joseph Chiasson..........$100.00 Mr. & Mrs. Joseph J. Cefalu, Sr. ...........$1,000.00

Open Burses with Balance as of January 31, 2020 Donald Peltier Sr. No. 4 .....................................$13,000.00 Joseph Strada Memorial ...................................$12,642.63 Msgr. Raphael C. Labit No. 2 ...........................$11,560.00 Joseph Waitz Sr. ...................................................$11,500.00 Claude & Lucy Mahler Family .........................$11,400.00 Mr. & Mrs. George C. Fakier ............................$11,300.00 Harvey Peltier No. 31 ..........................................$10,486.91 Clay Sr. & Evelida Duplantis No. 2 ................$10,000.00 C. Remie Duplantis No. 2 ..................................$10,000.00 Marie Elise Duplantis No. 2 ..............................$10,000.00 Maude & Edith Daspit No. 2 ...........................$10,000.00 Msgr. George A. Landry ....................................$10,000.00 Msgr. William Koninkx .........................................$8,300.00 Catholic Daughters ................................................$7,080.00 Rev. Victor Toth ......................................................$7,000.00 Msgr. Francis Amedee .........................................$6,850.00 Rev. Gerard Hayes .................................................$6,686.00 Brides of the Most Blessed Trinity ...................$6,598.00 Rev. Peter Nies ........................................................$6,000.00 Rev. Guy Zeringue .................................................$6,000.00 Mr. & Mrs. Love W. Pellegrin ............................$5,000.00 Anonymous No. 2 ..................................................$5,000.00 Mr. & Mrs. Caliste Duplantis Family No. 4 .......$5,000.00 Rev. William M. Fleming ......................................$5,000.00 Mrs. Ayres A. Champagne ..................................$5,000.00 Rev. Kasimir Chmielewski ...................................$4,839.00 Joseph “Jay” Fertitta ..............................................$4,450.00 Rev. Henry Naquin ................................................$4,311.00

Anawin Community ..............................................$4,200.00 Harry Booker No. 2 ...............................................$4,138.00 Msgr. James Songy ...............................................$4,075.00 Kelly Curole Frazier ................................................$3,610.96 Mr. & Mrs. John Marmande ..............................$3,500.00 J. R. Occhipinti .........................................................$3,400.00 Preston & Gladys Webre ....................................$3,400.00 Mr. & Mrs. Galip Jacobs ......................................$3,060.00 St. Jude .......................................................................$3,000.00 Warren J. Harang Jr. No. 2 ..................................$3,000.00 Diocesan Knights of Columbus No. 2 ............$2,894.62 Rev. Peter H. Brewerton ......................................$2,600.00 Willie & Emelda St. Pierre ...................................$2,000.00 Rev. John Gallen .....................................................$1,950.00 Rev. H.C. Paul Daigle ............................................$1,900.00 Deacon Connely Duplantis .................................$1,700.00 Alfrances P. Martin ................................................$1,650.00 Msgr. Francis J. Legendre No. 2 .......................$1,645.00 Rev. Robert J. Sevigny ..........................................$1,600.00 Jacob Marcello ........................................................$1,600.00 Rev. Hubert C. Broussard ....................................$1,550.00 Judge Louis & Shirley R. Watkins ....................$1,550.00 Msgr. Emile J. Fossier ...........................................$1,545.00 Ronnie Haydel .........................................................$1,535.00 Dr. William Barletta Sr. .........................................$1,525.00 Deacon Robert Dusse’ .........................................$1,450.00 Rev. Anthony Rousso ...........................................$1,300.00 Dean Joseph Chiasson .........................................$1,300.00

Msgr. John L. Newfield ........................................$1,200.00 Rev. Joseph Tu Tran No. 2 ..................................$1,094.00 Msgr. John G. Keller ..............................................$1,050.00 Rev. Clemens Schneider ......................................$1,000.00 Bishop Warren L. Boudreaux No. 4 .................$1,000.00 Edna W. DiSalvo .....................................................$1,000.00 Bernice Harang .......................................................$1,000.00 Deacon Willie Orgeron ............................................$900.00 Ruby Pierce ..................................................................$800.00 Deacon Roland Dufrene ..........................................$750.00 Juliette & Eugene Wallace ......................................$700.00 Deacon Edward J. Blanchard .................................$700.00 Deacon Raymond LeBouef .....................................$550.00 Paul & Laura Duet ....................................................$550.00 Mr. & Mrs. Anthony Cannata ................................$500.00 Robert Walsh ...............................................................$500.00 Anne Veron Aguirre ..................................................$380.00 Deacon Harold Kurtz ................................................$300.00 Richard Peltier No. 2 .................................................$300.00 Claude Bergeron ........................................................$250.00 Rev. Michael Finnegan .............................................$200.00 Mr. & Mrs. Arthur Naquin ......................................$150.00 Deacon Pedro Pujals .................................................$100.00 Rev. Warren Chassaniol ...........................................$100.00 Grant J. Louviere ..........................................................$100.00 Deacon Eldon Frazier .................................................$50.00 Deacon Nick Messina .................................................$50.00

Overall Seminarian Burses Total: $1,760,443.02 ~ CFSL Seminarian Endowments Total: $4,271,757.76 March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 31

March Daily Prayer for Priests, Deacons and Seminarians

Sunday

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

1 March

2

3

4

5

6

7

Rev. Brett Lapeyrouse

Rev. Alex Lazarra

Rev. Peter Tai Le

Rev. Glenn LeCompte

Very Rev. Eric Leyble, J.V.

Deacon Gerald Belanger, retired

Rev. Jacob Lipari III

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

Rev. Joey Lirette

Rev. Aurelio Luzon

Rev. Clyde Mahler

Seminarian Davis Ahimbisibwe

Rev. Fernando Anaya

Rev. John David Matherne

Rev. André Melancon

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

Rev. John Nambusseril

Rev. Jean-Marie Nsambu

Deacon Raymond Bourg Jr., retired

Rev. John M. Van Pham, C.R.M.

Rev. Joseph Pilola

Rev. Bennie Rebosura

Rev. Patrick Riviere

22

23

24

25

26

27

28

Rev. Robert Rogers

Rev. Blair Sabaricos

Deacon Sam Burregi, retired

Rev. Henry Sebastian

Rev. Mitchel Semar

Rev. Antonio Maria Speedy

Seminarian Daniel Duplantis

29

30

31

Rev. Carlos Talavera

Rev. James M. Thien Van Nguyen, C.R.M.

Bishop Shelton J. Fabre

Daily Prayer for Clergy and Religious Lord Jesus, hear our prayer for the spiritual renewal of bishops, priests, deacons, brothers, sisters, lay ministers and seminarians of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux. We praise You for giving their ministry to the Church. In these days, renew them with the gifts of Your Spirit.

You once opened the Holy Scriptures to Your disciples when You walked on this earth. Now renew Your ordained and chosen ones with the truth and power of Your Word.

In Eucharist you gave Your disciples renewed life and hope. Nourish Your consecrated ones with Your own Body and Blood. Help them to imitate in their lives the death and resurrection they celebrate around Your altar.

Give them enthusiasm for the Gospel, zeal for the salvation of all people, courage in leadership and humility in service.

Give them Your love for one another and for all their brothers and sisters in You. For You love them, Lord Jesus, and we love and pray for them in Your Holy Name, today especially for _______________________. Amen.

Sponsored by:

of the Word 506 Cardinal Drive, Thibodaux, LA • marianservantsoftheword@gmail.com

32 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Book Reviews

A Minute to Midnight Reading With Raymond Raymond Saadi

The CRIES of JESUS from the CROSS An Anthology

By Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen Sophia $18.95 Readers who can recall seeing Archbishop Sheen on TV in the 50s will welcome this collection of his memorable talks and explanatory diagrams on his blackboard. His clear and easy to understand explanations of subjects will touch the hearts, not only of Catholics, but of many millions of other faiths that tuned in every Tuesday night on ABC for his program, “Life Is Worth Living” which topped even popular Milton Berle and Frank Sinatra on another network at the same time. Sheen tells why Jesus calls on his father to forgive the soldiers instead of forgiving them himself; why Jesus never proclaimed his innocence, and more. Included are secrets to living the Beatitudes. BC

By David Baldacci Grand Central $29 How long can a person hold guilt and regret in her heart? Thirty years? Is that too long? It is for FBI agent, Atlee Pine, who survived an attack by a mystery intruder when she was six years old leaving her badly beaten and her twin sister, Mercy, kidnapped and never found. To keep her sanity and her job with the FBI, she decides to return to her childhood town of Andersonville, GA, taking her assistant, Carol Blum with her. No sooner after arriving strange ritualistic murders began. Can they somehow be related to Atlee’s arrival? If so, the killer she seeks may still be there and delights in her return. BC

I Really Needed This Today Words to Live By

By Hoda Kotb Putnam $24 I met Hoda one time in New Orleans and was charmed by her and her willingness to come speak to my club.

Only she didn’t, because New York was calling and she departed to co-anchor the Today Show where she remains piling up prestige awards including the Peabody and the Edward R. Murrow award. In her delightfully inspiring book she posts a daily aphorism (the finest thoughts in the fewest words), many quotes from her favorite writers and her own. One for every day of the year and since its March already, feel free to double up till you catch up. BC

The Ship of Dreams: The Sinking of the Titanic and the End of the Edwardian Era

By Gareth Russell Atria $30 Who needs another book about the sinking of the passenger ship that “Even God could not sink”?

(Maybe they should have asked God about that.) Russell’s new book does indeed cover the planning, building and sinking of the massive vessel, perfect for anyone not saturated or satisfied with previous works, but more interestingly, his focusing on the experiences of six survivors provides visions of the terrifying scramble for lifeboats, some lowering with far fewer than occupancy. This section is hard to take but impossible to put down. BC

the little float that could

By Yvonne Perret River Road Press $17.99 Here’s a thriller for the little ones. The last float in the big parade filled with happy costumed kids had barely started out when a wheel broke, leaving them stranded. Until someone noticed other unused floats in the den, the smallest of all inviting them to ride it. But could it make it over the big bridge? You’ll have to read to the end to find out. And, they had a happy Mardi Gras after all. BC March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 33

Church Life

Photos by Lawrence Chatagnier

St. Joseph Altars

The feast of St. Joseph is being celebrated Thursday, March 19 this year. Many church parishes in the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux observe this feast day by creating St. Joseph Altars that are available for viewing by the general public. Following is a list of the St. Joseph Altars that will be on display throughout the diocese this year.

Cathedral of St. Francis de Sales, Houma The St. Joseph Altar will be on display Thursday, March 19 from 8 a.m. until 6:30 p.m. A St. Joseph Mass will be celebrated by Bishop Shelton J. Fabre at 8:30 a.m., followed by blessing of the altar and the Tupa Tupa. The altar will be closed March 20-21 and reopen Sunday, March 22 from 8 a.m. until 6 p.m. Goody bags filled with

Ready for viewing March 19

cookies, fava beans, St. Joseph prayer cards and other religious items will be served to all. Italian fig cookies will be on sale to benefit diocesan seminarian education and other charitable work.

St. Joseph Co-Cathedral, Thibodaux A St. Joseph Altar will be on display in the church Thursday, March 19 following a blessing after the 6:30 a.m.

Mass and will be available for viewing until the final blessing after the 5:30 p.m. Mass. All visitors to the altar are invited to bring a canned good which

34 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

will be donated to the Good Samaritan Food Bank of Thibodaux.

Annunziata, Houma A St. Joseph Altar will be blessed after the 8 a.m. Mass on Thursday, March 19, with a potluck meal after the 6 p.m. Mass.

Christ the Redeemer, Thibodaux

A St. Joseph Altar will be on display in the Family Center, beginning with a blessing immediately after the 7:30 a.m. Mass Thursday, March 19, with viewing from 8 a.m. until 5 p.m. Mass will be celebrated at 5:30 p.m., followed by breaking of the altar and a fish courtbouillon.

Holy Savior, Lockport

A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing Thursday, March 19 from 9 a.m. until 3 p.m. at 155 Church St. in Lockport.

a

Church Life

Maria Immacolata, Houma A St. Joseph Altar will be blessed Wednesday, March 18 at 1 p.m., with viewing until 7 p.m. The altar will reopen Thursday, March 19 at 8 a.m. with viewing until 7 p.m. A meal will be served both days.

Our Lady of the Isle, Grand Isle A St. Joseph Altar will be blessed at the 5 p.m. vigil Mass on Saturday, March 14, and at the 9 and 11 a.m.

Masses Sunday, March 15. The altar will be available for viewing after each Mass.

Our Lady of Prompt Succor, Chackbay The Ladies Altar Society is sponsoring a St. Joseph Altar Thursday, March 19, in the church hall starting with the 7 a.m. Mass. The altar will be on display until 3 p.m.

Our Lady of the Rosary, Larose The annual St. Joseph Altar will be held Thursday, March 19, in the school cafeteria. Viewing will be from 9 a.m. until 4 p.m.

Sacred Heart, Cut Off The blessing of the St. Joseph Altar will take place at 10:30 a.m., Thursday, March 19. Lunch will be served beginning at 11 a.m. and viewing will close at 4 p.m.

Sacred Heart, Morgan City A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing in the church, Thursday, March 19 beginning with a blessing after the 6:30 a.m. Mass, with viewing until 3 p.m.

St. Bernadette, Houma A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing Thursday, March 19 in Herbert Hall beginning with the 8 a.m. blessing, with viewing available until 6 p.m. A meal will be served at 11 a.m.

St. Bridget, Schriever A St. Joseph Altar will be blessed Thursday, March 19 after the 8 a.m.

Mass with viewing until 6 p.m. A meal will be served at Noon.

St. Eloi, Theriot A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing in the Community Center Thursday, March 19, beginning with the blessing of the altar at 10 a.m. Mass will be celebrated at 6 p.m., followed by a shrimp spaghetti dinner at 6:30 p.m. and breaking of the altar at 7:30 p.m.

St. Genevieve, Thibodaux A St. Joseph Altar will be on display Thursday, March 19 in the Family Center, with viewing from 9:30 a.m. until 6 p.m.

St. Hilary of Poitiers, Mathews St. Hilary’s St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing Thursday, March 19, in the multipurpose building beginning with a blessing 8 a.m. until Mass at 5 p.m.

St. Joseph, Chauvin A St. Joseph Altar will be on display Thursday, March 19, beginning with Mass at 8:30 a.m.in church, followed by blessing of the altar at 9 a.m. in the parish center. A meal will be served at Noon and the altar will close at 6 p.m.

St. Joseph, Galliano A St. Joseph Altar will be on display Thursday, March 19, in the parish recreation center behind St. Joseph Church, 17980 West Main Street in Galliano. The altar will be blessed and open for public viewing at 8 a.m. and will close at 3 p.m. A shrimp spaghetti meal will be served to the public beginning at 11 a.m.

St. Lawrence, Chacahoula A St. Joseph Altar will be blessed at 8 a.m. Thursday, March 19 with viewing until 6 p.m. A meal will be served in Finnegan Hall at 6 p.m., following the closing of the altar. The altar will also be available for viewing Saturday, March 21 from 3 p.m. until Mass time at 4:30 p.m., and Sunday, March 22 from 8:30 a.m. until Mass time at 9:30 a.m.

St. Lawrence, Kraemer A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing at the Life Center Thursday, March 19 from 8 a.m. until 4 p.m.

St. Mary’s Nativity, Raceland A St. Joseph Altar will be on display at St. Mary’s Community Center, 3500 Highway 1 in Raceland, Thursday, March 19 and Friday, March 20 from 8 a.m. until 3 p.m. Mass will be celebrated March 19 at 8 a.m., followed by blessing of the altar. Food and refreshments will be served both days.

Battaglia Home, Thibodaux The Battaglia family will host a St. Joseph Altar Thursday, March 19, at the home of Dominic Battaglia, 832 Jackson Street in Thibodaux, from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. The public is invited to join in honoring St. Joseph on this special day.

Lafourche Home for the Aged A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing Thursday, March 19 at the Lafourche Home for the Aged, 1002 Tiger Drive, Thibodaux. Viewing will begin at 8 a.m. Bishop Fabre will bless the altar at 11 a.m. and viewing will continue until 4 p.m.

Thibodaux Healthcare Center A St. Joseph Altar will be on display Thursday, March 19 at 1300 Lafourche Dr. in Thibodaux. Blessing of the altar will take place at 8:30 a.m. Viewing will end at 2 p.m. eLearning Academy A St. Joseph Altar will be available for viewing Thursday, March 19 at eLearning Academy, 806 North Acadia Road in Thibodaux from 9 a.m. until 2 p.m., with blessing of the altar at 8:30 a.m. BC

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 35

Special

Catholic school grant winners announced

By Janet Marcel All Catholic school teachers in the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux were given an opportunity to compete for mini-grants as part of the diocesan Educators Conference program. In a ceremony that took place at this year’s Conference, which is sponsored annually by the Catholic Schools Office, five grants of $500 each were awarded to teachers to fund the winning grants as follows.

“3rd Grade STEM Centers,” written

by Lea Esteve of St. Genevieve Catholic School in Thibodaux, will be used to purchase kits to provide third grade students the opportunity to complete STEM activities, help children think like scientists and engineers, and work collaboratively to problem solve.

Students will explore flight, friction, airflow, bridge building, flash floods, and more by designing and building different items.

“Light Up Reading Instruction,” written by Chastity Pitre of St. Francis de Sales Cathedral School in Houma, will be used to purchase Get Your

Lauren Boudreaux

Caroline Bourgeois

Christie Foret

Neon Read On kits that will help students attack complex text with ease and provide them the opportunity to become hands-on critical thinkers.

“Imagine, Build, Repeat,” written

by Meghan Braud, Caroline Bourgeois and Leah Jones of St. Joseph Catholic Elementary School in Thibodaux, will be used to purchase building materials for Pre-K students that will assist with their individual and group learning, using their engineering skills through the process of trial and error.

“Coding 101,” written by Christie Foret of St. Mary’s Nativity School in Raceland, will provide students with a hands-on opportunity to learn about computer coding using Edison Robots.

Using iPads, students will plan, design and write a program for the robot to

Meghan Braud

Leah Jones

Lea Esteve

Chastity Pitre

perform a simple task. This project, which will incorporate science, math and technology, is expected to impact over 200 children.

“The Nurture of Nature,” written by Lauren Boudreaux of Central Catholic School in Morgan City, will be used to purchase outdoor play equipment, such as a seesaw, a water table, and a Climb-N-Crawl caterpillar for prekindergarten students. The use of the equipment will help young learners with creative expression and gross motor development while allowing them to spend time outdoors.

Funding of these grants was made possible by First American Bank and Trust, Pedestal Bank, United Community Bank, Synergy Bank, and Morgan City Bank and Trust. BC

The Office wishes to thank these sponsors of the 2020 Teacher Grant awards.

36 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Diocesan Events

www.bayoucatholic.com

March

n Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux’s VITA Program is offering free income tax preparation and e-filing every Tuesday (Feb. 4 – April 14) from 9 a.m.–3 p.m., on the second floor of the Terrebonne Parish Main Library in Houma, for wage earners making less than $60,000 a year. n Rite of Election, Sunday, March 1, 3 p.m., St. Joseph Co-Cathedral, Thibodaux. n Food for the Journey, Tuesday, March

April

n Chrism Mass, Thursday, April 9, 10:30 a.m., Cathedral of St. Francis de Sales, Houma. n Hispanic Ministry workshop for altar servers, April 4, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 10 a.m.—2 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Last Supper

May

n Mother Teresa Women’s Giving Circle grant check presentation, May 8, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 2 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry retreat for confirmation

3, Ellendale Country Club Restaurant, 3319 Highway 311, Houma, 10:45 a.m.-12:45 p.m.

Speaker, Father Duc Bui. n Parish Social Ministry Gathering, “20/20 Love Vision,” Saturday, March 7, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 8:30 a.m.—3:30 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry workshop for extraordinary ministers of holy Communion, March 14, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever,

9 a.m.—1 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Tú, Yo y Cristo meeting, March 15, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 5–8 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Lenten retreat, March 21, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 9 a.m.—2 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry RCIA retreat, March 28, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 9 a.m.—2 p.m.

celebration, April 9, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 7 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Passion of the Lord celebration, April 10, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 3 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Easter Vigil, April 11, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 8 p.m.

n Hispanic Ministry Tú, Yo y Cristo meeting, April 19, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 5–8 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry workshop for ushers and greeters, April 25, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 9 a.m.—1 p.m.

candidates and sponsors, May 9, diocesan Pastoral Center, Schriever, 9 a.m.—2 p.m. n Hispanic Ministry Tú, Yo y Cristo meeting, May 10, diocesan Pastoral Center,

Schriever, 5–8 p.m. n Sacrament of confirmation for Hispanics, May 30, Cathedral of St. Francis de Sales, Houma, 10 a.m.

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 37

Lent

St. Luke the Evangelist, Thibodaux Date: March 1 Time: 10:30 a.m.

Date: March 3-4 Time: 7 p.m.

Speaker: Father Prentice Tipton

Parish Lenten missions 2020

Annunziata, Houma Date: March 2 Time: 6-8 p.m.

Speaker: Deacon Daniel Duplantis Sacred Heart, Morgan City Date: March 2-4 Time: 6-7:30 p.m.

Speaker: Father Augustine (Gus) Thrapple St. Genevieve, Thibodaux Date: March 3-5 Time: 7 p.m.

Speaker: Father Philip Neri Powell, O.P., Ph.D St. Andrew, Amelia Holy Hour with adoration Lenten reflection Date: March 3, 17, 24 Time: 7-8 p.m.

Our Lady of Prompt Succor, Golden Meadow Date: March 8 Time: 6-7:30 p.m.

Speaker: Father John David Matherne St. Charles Borromeo, St. Charles Date: March 9-11 Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Deacon Larry Oney St. Bernadette, Houma Date: March 12 Time: 7 p.m.

Speaker: Father André Melancon Our Lady of the Isle, Grand Isle Date: March 12 Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Father Paul Birdsall St. Ann, Bourg Prayer Date: March 12 Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Deacon Daniel Duplantis Fasting

Date: March 19 Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Deacon Rusty Bruce Almsgiving Date: March 26 Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Father Cody Chatagnier Our Lady of the Rosary, Larose Date: March 16-18 Time: 7 p.m.

Speaker: Deacon Melvin Marts St. Joseph, Chauvin Redeemed for the Kingdom of God Date: March 16-18

38 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Time: 6 p.m.

Speaker: Andi Oney March 16 Christ the Redeemer for Our Salvation March 17 Redemption Brings us into the Kingdom of God March 18 Power to Live in the Kingdom Reconciliation available March 18 St. Joseph, Galliano Date: March 29-31 Time: 7 p.m.

Speaker: Abbot Justin Brown, O.S.B. BC

Announcement

Three Catholic school teachers recognized for 25 years of service

Harvey (Doug) Hamilton III

Quinn Moreaux

Maureen (Shonie) Morvant

Three Catholic school teachers were recognized for 25 years of service in Catholic education in a ceremony that took place at this year’s diocesan educators conference.

Harvey (Doug) Hamilton III teaches AP government and psychology at Vandebilt Catholic High School in Houma. He also serves as the assistant athletic director and assistant girls soccer coach.

Quinn Moreaux currently teaches honors chemistry, honors chemistry II and honors physical science at Vandebilt Catholic High School, and works with the school’s band program.

He also served in administration for 16 years as assistant principal for student activities and admissions, and as the academic assistant principal.

Maureen (Shonie) Morvant teaches skills English, as well as academic enhancement skills and resources classes, and is the moderator of the 8th grade class at E.D. White Catholic High School in Thibodaux. BC

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Announcement

Parish social ministry gathering March 7 Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux’s parish social ministry is sponsoring a day of listening, learning, loving and living entitled “20/20 Love Vision,” at the diocesan Pastoral Center, March 7, from 8:30 a.m.— 3:30 p.m. Speakers include Father P.J. Madden, Father Joe Krafft, Deacon Kevin Carges and Matt Rousso.

This is a great opportunity for church parish outreach team members and others who are discerning how to serve the poor and vulnerable in their communities. Members of homebound ministries, feeding the poor ministries, visiting bereaved families and the sick, helpers of people in crisis/ disaster, as well as those who plan and fund such activities, are also encouraged to attend.

A light breakfast and lunch will be served. To register, email psm@htdiocese.org or call (985) 876-0490. BC

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40 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

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banksynergy.com | 985.851.2217 42 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

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Outreach Line In response to the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People from the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux is offering an Outreach Line (formerly known as the Child Protection Contact Line). The Outreach Line is an effort to continue the diocesan commitment to support healing for people who have been hurt or sexually abused recently or in the past by clergy, religious or other employees of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux.

The Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Outreach Line operates from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Monday through Friday. A trained mental health professional responds to the line. Individuals are offered additional assistance if requested.

The Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Outreach Line Telephone number is (985) 873-0026 or (985) 850-3172

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Línea de Comunicación Diocesana

Con el fin de cumplir con las Políticas de Protección de Niños y Jóvenes de la Conferencia de Obispos Católicos de Los Estados Unidos, la Diócesis de Houma-Thibodaux ofrece una Línea de Comunicación (antes Línea de Contacto para la Protección de los Niños). La Línea de Comunicación es parte del esfuerzo diocesano de comprometerse con el mejoramiento de aquéllos que han sido lastimados o abusados sexualmente recientemente o en el pasado por miembros del clero, religiosos u otros empleados de la Diócesis de Houma-Thibodaux.

El horario de la Línea de Comunicación de la Diócesis de Houma-Thibodaux es de 8:30 a.m. a 4:30 p.m., de lunes a viernes. El encargado de esta línea es un profesional capacitado en salud mental. Se ofrece asistencia adicional al ser solicitada.

Línea de Comunicación de la Diócesis de Houma-Thibodaux Número de teléfono (985) 873-0026 o (985) 850-3172

Ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi Cöùu giuùp Giaùo phaän Ñeå höôûng öùng Hieán chöông Baûo veä Treû em vaø Giôùi treû töø Hoäi ñoàng Giaùm muïc Hoa kyø, Giaùo phaän Houma-Thibodaux ñang chuaån bò ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi Cöùu giuùp (luùc tröôùc laø ñöôøng daây lieân laïc baûo veä treû em). Ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi Cöùu giuùp laø moät söï coá gaéng cuûa giaùo phaän nhaèm cam keát haøn gaén naâng ñôõ nhöõng ai ñaõ bò toån thöông hoaëc bò laïm duïng tính duïc hoaëc gaàn ñaây hoaëc trong quaù khöù bôûi giaùo só, tu só hoaëc caùc coâng nhaân vieân cuûa Giaùo phaän Houma-Thibodaux. Ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi Cöùu giuùp Giaùo phaän hoaït ñoäng töø 8:30 saùng ñeán 4:30 chieàu, thöù hai ñeán thöù saùu. Moät nhaân vieân chuyeân nghieäp veà söùc khoûe taâm thaàn traû lôøi treân ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi. Nhöõng caù nhaân seõ ñöôïc trôï giuùp naâng ñôõ theâm neáu caàn.

Ñöôøng daây ñieän thoaïi Cöùu giuùp Giaùo phaän Soá ñieän thoaïi: (985) 873-0026; (985) 850-3172

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 43

Announcement

Ann S. Thibodaux announces retirement from St. Joseph Manor, New administrator appointed

Ann Thibodaux

Ben Bolton

By Janet Marcel Ann S. Thibodaux, who has been serving as administrator of St. Joseph Manor in Thibodaux for the past 25 years, has announced that she will be retiring at the end of this month.

“After much prayerful consideration, I made the decision to retire in March 2020 about a year ago. The bittersweet decision was definitely not an easy one as I truly love working with the board of directors, residents and staff at the Manor. I have been blessed serving as administrator from the Manor’s inception until now. My years at the Manor and Cardinal Place have been very rewarding and have given me many great memories to treasure,” says Thibodaux.

Ben Bolton has been appointed as the new administrator by the board of directors, effective Feb. 1. The Vacherie native was hired in March 2016 as the administrative assistant of St. Joseph Manor and Cardinal Place. In August of 2018, he was promoted to assistant administrator of both facilities.

Bolton earned an associate’s degree in cardiopulmonary care science and a bachelor’s degree in history from Nicholls State University in Thibodaux.

He and his wife Adrienne Naquin-Bolton have been married for 13 years and they have three children, Olivia, eight; Aaron, five; and Adele, 19 months. They are parishioners of Christ the Redeemer Church in Thibodaux.

“Ben Bolton has done an excellent job during his four years at the Manor. He is a devout Catholic and an extremely well-qualified leader who will continue to successfully move the Manor forward,” says Thibodaux. BC

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44 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

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Financial Report 2019 Brothers and Sisters in Christ: I am pleased to continue the practice of sharing with you the annual financial report for our diocese here in the Bayou Catholic.

Again this year, we are publishing an accounting of the financial operations of the diocese, which are taken directly from the Audits of Consolidated Financial Statements of the Central Administrative Offices of the Roman Catholic Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux, offices and institutions – fiscal year July 1, 2018, to June 30, 2019.

These are independently audited financial statements, performed again this past year by LaPorte CPAs & Business Advisors.

The report indicates that our current financial position is stable, continuing a positive trend with proper controls in place to effectively monitor, manage and report on the financial health of our diocese. In the opinion of the auditor, our financial statements “present fairly our financial position, change in net assets and cash flows for the years ended in accordance with accounting principles generally accepted in the United States of America.”

This particular report is just one element of the accountability and transparency that the diocese strives to practice on a continuing basis.

Whether it be the construction of our operating budget, monitoring our progress and/or properly controlling our expenses, I would like to assure each of you that our diocesan staff is committed to the most ethical and prudent fiscal management of the resources to which you have entrusted us.

I ask for God’s blessing on each of you in this Lenten season, and once again thank you for your continued and generous support of our Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux.

Respectfully submitted,

Jon J. Toups Chief Operating & Financial Officer Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 45

2019 Diocese of HoumaStatement of revenues and expenses Assets

Cash and Investments

Accounts Receivable and Other Current Assets

Property and Equipment, net of Depreciation

Other Assets

Total Assets

$ 56,292,732 1,609,184 10,359,341 4,634,564

Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Assets Parish loans, $1,866,958

Property, plant & equipment, net, $10,359,341

$ 72,895,821

Liabilities and Net Assets (Deficit) Liabilities

Cash and investments, $56,292,732

Accounts Payable and Other Current Liabilities

Central Finance Deposit Liabilities

Postretirement Benefit Liability – Priests

Other Liabilities

Total Liabilities

$ 2,018,318 57,922,907 12,579,734 497,599 $ 73,018,558

Net Assets (Deficit)

With Donor Restrictions

Without Donor Restrictions

Total Net Assets (Deficit)

Total Liabilities and Net Assets (Deficit)

$ 6,673,996 (6,796,733) (122,737) $ 72,895,821

Revenues and Other Support:

Cathedraticum Donations and Grants Investment and Royalty Income Insurance Premiums Other Program Income Net Assets Released From Restrictions

Total Revenues and Other Support

Expenses:

Program Expenses:

Formation Ministries

Social Ministries

Clergy and Religious Expenses

Administration Ministries

General and Administrative Expenses

Stewardship Expenses

Total Expenses

Other Increases (Decreases) in Net Assets

Postretirement Plan Changes

Change in Net Assets

46 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Other assets, $2,767,606

Other current assets, $1,609,184

Without Donor Restrictions $ 2,381,848 3,103,836 3,156,066 10,414,042 2,664,151 91,125 $ 21,811,068

Some notes regarding the diocese’s assets: The diocese’s assets are comprised primarily of investments and property, plant and equipment. The source of the invested funds stems mainly from the Diocesan Central Finance program. Deposits and endowments in the Central Finance program account exceed the total balance of cash and investments.

Property, plant and equipment includes property received from the Archdiocese of New Orleans upon the formation of our diocese in 1977. Also, it includes the cost of fixed asset additions made since the formation of the diocese (exclusive of replacements), net of depreciation.

With Donor Restrictions 249,785 (3,507) (91,125)

Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Liabilities

$

$ 155,153

Central finance deposits, $40,279,323

Priests' postretirement benefits liability, $12,579,734

Insurance program reserves, $497,599

Endowments held for others, $17,643,584

Some notes regarding the diocese’s liabilities and accruals: Seventy-nine (79%) of the liabilities of the diocese result from the inclusion of deposits in the diocese’s Central Finance program and endowments in the liability category. The liability for priests’ postretirement benefits other than pensions (mainly health insurance and long-term care) have historically been paid and will be paid in the future through the diocese’s normal annual budgetary process.

Some notes regarding the Diocese's liabilities and accruals:

$ 1,876,670 1,985,671 2,102,768 11,931,896 1,051,428 213,849

$

-

$ 19,162,282

$

-

$ (564,563)

$

-

$ 2,084,223

$ 155,153

Accounts payable and other current liabilities, $2,018,318

Thibodaux Financial Report for the year ended June 30, 2019 Diocesan Finance Council The Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux is grateful to the members of the diocesan finance council. These individuals play an important consultative role in the fiscal management of the diocese. The 2018-2019 diocesan finance council members are: Father Michael Bergeron Angelique Barker Robert Naquin Quint Ocker Tim Robichaux Craig Stanga Rodney Whitney Consultants: Jon J. Toups April M. LeBouef Ex-Officio Member: Very Rev. Simon Peter Engurait, V.G.

The Audit and the Auditor’s Opinion The financial statements were audited by an independent certified public accounting firm. Diocesan management chooses to hire these auditors to help fulfill its role as good and responsible stewards of the generous funds contributed by its parishioners. The auditors expressed an “unmodified” opinion on the diocese’s financial statements.

An “unmodified” opinion means the financial statements are fairly presented, in all material respects, in accordance with accounting principles generally accepted in the United States of America.

The complete audited report is available to all on the diocesan website, www.htdiocese.org. Click as follows: Offices, Administration, Finance, then Documents.

Expenses by Office/Department Formation Ministries:

Family Ministries

Worship

Catholic Schools

Religious Education

Parish Support

Evangelization

Youth Ministries

Communications

Bayou Catholic

ABA Grants to Parishes and Schools

$ 129,278 63,755 288,314 6,933 444,454 205,274 41,315 139,660 373,465 184,222

Total Formation Ministries

$ 1,876,670

Social Ministries:

Catholic Charities

Hospital Chaplain

Assisi Bridge House

St. Lucy Childcare Center

Disaster Services

Catholic Housing

Micro-Enterprise (C.E.N.T.S.)

Foster Grandparent

Food Banks

$ 445,408 89,529 365,466 378,802 35,422 45,047 32,023 223,584 370,390

Total Social Ministries

$ 1,985,671

Clergy and Religious:

Seminarian Formation

Vocations

Permanent Diaconate

Continuing Education

Office of the Bishop

Pension and Postretirement Benefits

$ 549,160 41,320 3,529 41,811 106,062 1,360,886

Total Clergy and Religious

$ 2,102,768

Administration Ministries:

Computer and Technology Support

Construction

Archives

Tribunal

Safe Environment

Cemeteries and Cemeteries Trust

St. Joseph Cemetery

Property and Casualty Insurance

Human Resources and Employee Benefits

Central Finance

Lumen Christi

$ 171,679 55,184 53,274 62,267 145,890 79,578 429,049 3,389,520 6,724,649 491,054 329,752

Total Administration Ministries

$ 11,931,896

Total Program Expenses

$ 17,897,005

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 47

Unrestricted Revenues and Expenses for the year ended June 30, 2019 Program expenses

Formation Social Clergy and Administration Total General and Ministries Ministries Religious Ministries Program Administrative Stewardship Total

Revenues:

Cathedraticum

Donations and grants

$

-

$ 2,381,848

-

$ 2,381,848

377,020

-

1,244,016

$

-

$

600,577

-

$

14,917

-

2,236,530

$

53,191

$

814,115

3,103,836

Investment income

-

14,383

26,015

2,647,262

2,687,660

-

-

2,687,660

Oil and gas royaltie

-

-

-

-

-

468,406

-

468,406

Program service and other income

460,592

983,086

24,120

11,380,196

12,847,994

230,199

-

13,078,193

Net assets released from restrictions

-

34,847

-

56,278

91,125

-

-

91,125

Total revenues

$ 837,612

$ 2,276,332

$ 650,712

$ 14,098,653

$ 17,863,309

$ 3,133,644

$ 513,518

$ 680,472

$ 13,752

$ 719,532

$ 1,927,274

$ 171,986

$ 21,686

$ 2,120,946

133,975

31,955

67,398

20,000

253,328

39,858

-

293,186

37,420

48,784

1,047

47,035

134,286

13,957

1,522

149,765

$ 814,115 $ 21,811,068

Expenses:

Salaries - lay personnel

Salaries - religious

Payroll taxes

Group insurance

144,198 179,167 76,220 160,049 559,634

Group insurance - retired priests

Pension and benefits

Business allowance/reimbursement

38,056

30,078

28,592

11,901

Conference and travel

20,709

38,694

25,384

15,234

Program expenses

591,824

223,473

528,402

9,510,573

10,854,272

-

-

1,267,160

-

1,267,160

-

-

1,267,160

28,299

34,263

6,663

42,217

111,442

11,967

1,241

124,650

108,627

35,035

51

143,713

100,021

18,362

-

118,383

30,575

185,858

11,070,705

Supplies

3,687

47,896

13,998

3,417

97,070

18,926

Maintenance and repair

Insurance

Occupancy expenses

Other operating expenses

Copying and printing

Papal quota and Catholic Conference

Contributions and grants

- 34,082

Depreciation Central finance interest expense

Emergency assistance and disaster relief

Telephone

Total expenses

Excess (deficiency) of revenues over expenses

66,197 118,959

-

131,778

17,632

-

149,410

238,372

68,268

-

306,640

- 34,082

-

- 34,082

4,500

73,138

9,755

75,112

162,505

44,388

-

206,893

12,290

83,583

8,338

60,063

164,274

156,226

-

320,500

127,865

355

2,350

-

130,570

38,908

-

169,478

-

-

-

-

-

72,810

-

72,810

184,222

-

-

508,491

692,713

6,911

-

699,624

32,690

59,434 3,491 622,559

-

476,260

-

71,988 -

33,653 -

491,054

85,479

491,054

-

-

491,054

-

283,207

-

-

283,207

-

-

283,207

- 27,466 1,130

223,810

252,450

- 28,596 12,661

- 41,257

$ 1,876,670

$ 1,985,671

$ 2,102,768

$ 11,931,896

$ 17,897,005

$ 1,051,428

$ 213,849 $ 19,162,282

$ (1,039,058)

$ 290,661

$ (1,452,056)

$ 2,166,757

$ (33,696)

$ 2,082,216

$ 600,266

48 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

$ 2,648,786

Diocese flourishes as it looks toward the future Office of Catholic Schools The diocesan Office of Catholic Schools provides assistance, support and guidance for administratorministers, teacher-ministers, school advisory councils, and parents in order to promote and enhance the educational ministry of the Catholic Church here in our diocese.

The 12 Catholic schools in our diocese educate over 5,000 students each year, making it the largest evangelical ministry in the diocese. The District ACT College Readiness Results for the recent 2019 graduating class from the three diocesan high schools reflected an average composite score that was almost five points higher than the state average.

Office of Parish Support The diocesan Office of Parish Support exists to serve, provide resources, and accompany pastors, their staffs, and their pastoral leadership teams in the work of parish renewal. The OPS replaces the previous offices of Religious Education, Youth Ministry and Family Ministry.

The Office of Parish Support is comprised of a team of parish liaisons who assist parishes in the implementation of their individual parish strategic plans and serve as a support and resource for the pastor, his staff, and lay leadership teams. Rather than focusing on one area of expertise, the liaisons become the expert in all aspects of parish life: Adult formation, youth formation, Sunday and outreach.

Catholic Foundation of South Louisiana The Catholic Foundation provides an avenue allowing donors of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux to give to the many different Catholic entities of the diocese in the best manner possible. By working closely with parishes, schools and individual donors, the CFSL makes giving simple and meaningful. The Foundation can administer a donor’s philanthropic giving, both now and after their death. The CFSL provides

a flexible array of services that helps donors shape a meaningful charitable legacy.

The CFSL has administered a number of successful initiatives in the diocese in recent years, including the Annual Bishop’s Appeal, #iGiveCatholic and the Mother Teresa Women’s Giving Circle.

Project Updates As described elsewhere in this issue, the generous donation of Mary’s Manor from the Mary & Al Danos Family Foundation provides a beautiful diocesan presence in the South Lafourche area, with the potential of retired priest housing in the years to come.

Diocesan officials in recent months have been working closely with archival experts nationally to improve, digitize and conform diocesan records to current standards. The improvements will not only greatly assist the diocesan Archives and Historical Research Center housed on the Nicholls State University campus, but provide much needed assistance to church parish and school staffs.

The Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux raised the second highest figure of all Louisiana dioceses and secured a top 10 national ranking in the 2019 24-hour #iGiveCatholic online giving challenge.

Over $460,000 was raised, celebrating and greatly assisting the work of our parishes, schools and other ministries.

By virtue of a $150,000 grant from the Mary & Al Danos Family Foundation, the diocese will soon purchase and implement a new financial management system to assist pastors, bookkeepers, finance councils, school presidents and administratorministers throughout our diocese.

The diocesan Finance and Accounting Office is also in the early stages of providing compliance assistance to those same employees, with an end goal of providing protection and compliance assurance to ensure all are better financial stewards.

Learn more about the work of the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux Visit www.htdiocese.org March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 49

Sports

Overtime Ed Daniels

Some of Louisiana’s best recruits are staying on the bayou in Thibodaux It is new turf for the head football coach of the Nicholls Colonels.

“We recruited a lot of good football players,” said head coach Tim Rebowe.

“Unfortunately, we can’t take all of them.”

The Colonels continue to flex their muscle in southeast Louisiana, and

especially in metro New Orleans.

Despite having three quarterbacks who will compete for the starting job in the spring, Nicholls was able to sign Karr quarterback Leonard Kelly, who led the Cougars to back to back state 4A championships.

“He is a winner,” said Rebowe. “He didn’t care who was in the quarterback room, he wanted to compete.”

The Colonels also landed a pair of defenders from Archbishop Rummel’s Division I state champions.

Linebacker Quinton “Pig” Cage is someone who according to Rebowe is “always around the ball.”

“He can play multiple positions.”

At Nicholls, he’ll be joined by teammate Malik Woodery, a defensive back.

Both were part of a defense that yielded no touchdowns in eight of 10 regular season games.

Nicholls also landed St. James quarterback Shamar Smith, who will play slot receiver for the Colonels.

Nicholls also got a signature from John Ehret’s Brandon James, one of the most versatile players in the state.

James can play offense, defense, and return kicks.

He will play defense, first at Nicholls.

On signing day, James said why he chose Nicholls.

“I chose Nicholls because it felt like home,” said James.

“The campus, the coaches, they just kept that connection. I love coach Tim Rebowe and coach Lee Roussel. They

are going to get me better and better at what I do.”

John Ehret head coach Marcus Scott said James had other opportunities.

“He could have gone other places, bigger programs, but he decided to stay close to home.”

“It is a really good fit for him, and we are looking forward to the next four years.”

The 2020 season at Nicholls will be a page turner.

Quarterback Chase Fourcade, who led the Colonels to back to back Southland Conference titles, finished his eligibility.

When spring practice kicks off March 11, a three-way quarterback battle will commence between Lindsey Scott, Kohen Granier and Andrew Robison.

“Chase will be difficult to replace,” said Rebowe. “And, the hardest part will be to replace his leadership.”

Rebowe said one of the best things about the 2019 season is that the Colonels were picked to finish first, and finished first.

But, 2019 doesn’t appear to be the last Southland Conference title to be won in Thibodaux in the foreseeable future.

“We have former players recruiting for us.”

And, on signing day, some of Louisiana’s best agreed.

The bayou is a great place to be. BC

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Marriage

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Marriage Contents

Meet our couples

54 Information Marriage preparation guidelines

58

Advice

Partnership

Jesus’ teachings of love

Common values

56

62

For more articles on strengthening your marriage, visit www.foryourmarriage.org

Advice Frequently asked questions

52 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

64

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Marriage

Couples featured in our Marriage Special Why is the sacrament of marriage important to you as a couple?

BRENNER PHOTOGRAPHY & FILMS

Marriage is an important sacrament for us as a couple. We both center our lives around the Lord and he is an essential component to our marriage. Without him we would not be able to learn and grow. With God at our core we are able to love, trust and adore each other. The sacrament of marriage bonds us together forever as we choose to continue to be with each other each and every day.

Emily C. and Tyler Evans Wedding Date: January 5, 2019 Church Parish: St. Bernadette, Houma 54 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

MICHAEL TORTORICH PHOTOGRAPHY

Getting married in a church has always been important to me and my husband. Growing up Catholic we knew that the blessed sacraments are important in life. Both of our families raised us with a strong Catholic upbringing, so we always believe in putting God first in our relationship. Getting married in the church was the next step in our spiritual journey together.

Blair W. and Robert Gonsoulin Wedding Date: January 11, 2020 Church Parish: St. Andrew, Amelia

KIMBRALI BOYD PHOTOGRAPHY

Daniel and I believe that marriage is a sacred bond between God and us. Our purpose as a couple is to be faithful in an everlasting commitment to grow, love, share our faith, and to live our best lives together. We both believe and practice the teachings of Jesus, which gives us a deeper faith, strength, and the grace to live and love to share with each other, our family and friends.

Allyson C. and Daniel Ferg Wedding Date: August 3, 2019 Church parish: Cathedral of St. Francis de Sales, Houma

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Marriage

Christian marriages should be grounded in Jesus’ teachings of love Guest Columnist Father Wilmer Todd

Maybe the primary root cause for Christian marriages failing today is that couples have chosen the secular ideals of marriage instead of being grounding in biblical teachings on marriage and family life. Only a return to God-centered teachings can remedy our current crisis surrounding marriage and the family.

The most important biblical principle is Christ’s love. When was the last time you told a family member, either in a letter, e-mail, or in person, that you loved him or her? Failure to express our love, verbally or visibly, especially to young people, can have disastrous effects. Young people need to know that they are loved. They need to see it and they need to feel it.

According to a study of more than 500 family counselors, the following are the top traits of successful families:

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n Communicating and listening n Affirming and supporting family members n Respecting one another n Developing a sense of trust n Sharing time and responsibility n Knowing right from wrong n Sharing a religious core

n Respecting privacy Good, strong families do not just happen. It takes a great deal of hard work to build, nurture and help our families grow in love, freedom, respect and kindness. In the end, nothing is guaranteed. We cannot control how children are going to turn out.

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Marriage

However, that does not mean we should not put our whole heart and soul into making our families the best they can be.

An essential ingredient of any successful family has to be an awareness of what is going on in the family. Awareness means paying attention to our other family members, listening to their stories, taking an interest in what is important to them.

If we are always busy with our own activities, we are probably missing much of what is going on with our other family members.

Sometime ago Ann Landers received a letter from a mother asking her at what age a father and son should stop kissing and saying “I love you” to each other. Ann Landers gave the mother a one-word answer: “Never.”

Shortly afterward Ann Landers received another letter from a father.

He said her response to the mother’s letter moved him to tears. He explained why: “A few weeks ago I kissed my son for the first time and told him I loved him. Unfortunately, he did not know it because he was dead. He had shot himself.”

The father continued: “The greatest regret of my life is that I kept my son at arms’ length. I believed it was unmanly for males to show affection for one another. I will never recover from my ignorance and stupidity.”

It is hard to believe that Jesus, who cried at the tomb of his friend Lazarus, never embraced his mother and said, “Mom, I love you.” It is hard to believe that Jesus, who told how the father kissed his returning prodigal son,

BRENNER PHOTOGRAPHY & FILMS

never hugged Joseph and said, “Dad, I love you.”

Family life is not just the responsibility of the parents. As children grow and become more aware of the needs of their family, they too should learn to take part in helping in whatever small or large ways they are capable. That’s how we learn the meaning of responsibility and respect.

Today we have all types of families – dual income, blended, single parent and empty nest families. In the family

of God, there is much diversity and each person in these families are of inestimable worth. It’s important to develop new models and find a new language for caring.

It takes hard work to build, nurture, and help your family to grow. Yet, as a member of a family, it is our calling.

God calls us to holiness precisely as a family. It is often in the working out of the various things that happen to us as a family that we find holiness.

Is God the center of your family? BC

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605 West 3rd St. ~ Thibodaux, LA 70301 ~ 985.446.1144 March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 57

Marriage Preparation in the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux

Approximately 125 engaged couples attend the Marriage Preparation Day annually, says Joe Klapatch, of the Office of Parish Support.

Marriage Preparation Day

The Marriage Preparation Day is a diocesan requirement that provides the opportunity for engaged couples to invest some time and effort into their formation as lifelong bride and groom, says Klapatch.

Some of these benefits are: v Faith based preparation about the sacrament of marriage; v Get a better understanding of marriage as a “sacrament.” Why do you want to get married in the church? What do couples consent to through a wedding in the Catholic Church? v Helps them to understand that there is a whole other family unit that wants to help them be successful in their marriage; v Build a strong faith based foundation for their marriage; v A connection back to the church – why it is important to be a part of the church and register in a parish.

FOCCUS Couples

Married couples may be invited to participate actively in the marriage preparation of engaged couples in their church parish as FOCCUS couples. FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding and Study) is a premarital instrument designed to help assess a couple’s readiness for marriage; it is a “snapshot” of where the couple is in their relationship at that moment. The diocese uses this instrument to help couples identify issues that need to be discussed, etc. FOCCUS couples are trained by the diocesan FOCCUS trainer of facilitators, and their number varies from parish to parish and priest to priest.

Attendance at Marriage Preparation Day

There is currently no set limit

Marriage preparation guidelines for the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux The Sacrament of Marriage

The sacrament of marriage is a serious and sacred commitment that calls a couple to each other in the most profound and permanent way. Their mutual love is a reminder of the sacrificial love of Jesus Christ. By the grace of their sacrament, they become able to love one another as Christ has loved them. As a married couple, they become a visible sign and reminder of Christ’s sacrificial love for all people.

The Engaged Couple

A couple desiring to be married is encouraged to contact their priest/deacon at least six (6) months (or more) prior to the proposed date of their wedding. This interval allows time to prepare well for such a sacred commitment.

The engaged couple must take an active part in all the steps of these guidelines which apply to them. With the assistance of their priest/deacon, they are to: v Identify and cultivate their strengths, v Deal with the areas of difficulty in their relationship, v Participate in assessment and preparation, v Recognize that marriage is essentially characterized by unity, fidelity, permanence and an openness to children, v Attend a formal marriage preparation program, v Participate in premarital evaluation and counseling when recommended.

A tentative wedding date may be set at the time of this initial contact with the priest/deacon. When the couple has completed phase two of the marriage preparation process, the tentative wedding date will be confirmed or changed.

Responsibilities

1. Priest/Deacon The church has the pastoral obligation to assist those desiring to marry to make a prayerful and mature judgment concerning their marriage. In particular, the priest/deacon, who plans to witness a marriage, is personally responsible for the complete marriage preparation process. He has the serious moral and ministerial responsibility to assist the engaged couple in understanding the meaning of Christian marriage in its human, spiritual, canonical and sacramental aspects, and to provide a liturgical experience that truly celebrates and manifests the momentous step that the couple is taking.

2. Community The faithful in each parish share in the pastoral responsibility to help engaged couples prepare for their life together. Married couples have a particular responsibility to witness the holiness of their sacramental life of intimacy, unity, self-sacrificing love and commitment. They may therefore be invited to participate actively in the marriage preparation of engaged couples in their parish.

3. Parents The church recognizes the unique and vital role of parents in the psychological, social, moral and spiritual development of their children. Renewal in the church has included attempts to make sacramental preparation more family centered.

Parents are therefore encouraged to respond to the invitation of the priest/deacon to participate actively in the assessment and preparation of their children for marriage in the church whenever possible.

The Marriage Preparation Process

All engaged couples are required to receive sacramental preparation and must meet with their priest/deacon at least six months (or more) prior to the desired wedding date. This marriage preparation process consists of four phases.

1. Phase One: Initial contact with priest/deacon will: v Establish rapport with you in order to support and counsel you at this most important time in your life. v Examine your motives for marriage. v Explore any special circumstances that may affect marriage, e.g., age, cultural background, pregnancy, military service, physical or emotional

58 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

a

to the amount of couples per date that are able to attend Marriage Preparation Day which is offered four times throughout the year in the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux

Marriage Preparation on the Internet

MICHAEL TORTORICH PHOTOGRAPHY

problems, levels of faith and religious issues. v Explain the marriage preparation process. v Obtain personal information, explain what other documentation is needed, and determine whether any dispensations or permissions will be necessary.

2. Phase Two: Assessment process with priest/deacon will: v Administer a Premarital Instrument* to assist in beginning the assessment of your readiness to marry. v Discuss the results of the FOCCUS instrument. v Discuss the strengths and weaknesses of your communication process. v Examine the sacramental aspects of your human covenant. v Assess your readiness for marriage and complete the prenuptial questionnaire. v Begin the liturgical wedding plans and present to you the parish guidelines.

Inform you of the cost and suggested offering. *A premarital instrument is a tool designed to help you assess your readiness for marriage. It is not a pass/fail indicator. Instead it is meant to help you discover more about yourselves and each other in a non-threatening and objective way. Our diocese utilizes the FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication Understanding and Study) instrument to help you identify issues that need to be discussed, reflected on, understood, studied for problem-solving, skill-building and decision-making. Your priest/deacon will give you more information at your initial meeting.

During phase two, the priest/deacon will make the decision to proceed or delay the marriage. If he proceeds, the wedding date will be confirmed and the process continues. If his decision is to delay the marriage, he will follow the procedure found in Delay of Marriage.

3. Phase Three: Formal marriage preparation This instructional phase, formal marriage preparation, presents the essential human and Christian aspects of marriage so that the couple becomes aware of the total dimensions of the marriage covenant. Formal marriage preparation includes reflection on the nature and sacramentality of marriage, married love and family life, couple prayer, marital responsibilities, communication within marriage, personal expectations, natural family planning and other practical considerations.

There are two approved options in the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux. If you are unable to attend such a formal marriage preparation program, you must discuss this with your priest/deacon immediately.

These are the approved options: v The diocesan Marriage Preparation program This is a one day conference that seeks to prepare engaged couples for the sacrament of marriage and every day after. Paul and Gretchen George, of the Art of Living Ministries, present engaging sessions throughout the day, using humor and parts of their own story. The talks will center around the following themes: Family of origin, marriage expectations, communication, sexuality, finances and spirituality. Through it all, engagement is discerning and preparing for a life-long companionship. When couples begin the hard work now, marriages

a

Catholicmarriageprep.com is an online program based in the Diocese of Colorado Springs, CO, that is featured on the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops website as a valid marriage preparation course.

This program is approved by the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux for couples with extenuating circumstances.

Updating the program

The diocese is constantly looking to update the Marriage Preparation Program and revise its marriage policies in response to changing circumstances in our society, in our economy and in the universal church. The sacrament part doesn’t change, but other factors are constantly changing

Pre-Cana

Pre-Cana, the name the diocese used for its marriage preparation program for many years, is still the name many parishes and dioceses give to their marriage preparation program. The term is derived from John 2:1–12, the wedding feast at Cana in Galilee, where Jesus performed the miracle of turning water into wine.

Catholic Engaged Encounter

This weekend retreat for engaged couples is an in-depth, private, personal, marriage preparation experience within the context of Catholic faith and values. During the weekend retreat there is plenty of alone time for couples to dialogue honestly and intensively about their prospective lives together – their strengths and weaknesses, desires, ambitions, goals, their attitudes about money, sex, children, family, their role in the church and society – in a face to face way.

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 59

Twelve tips for married couples v Manage your expectations. v Never assume, ask. v Remember to always say “I love you” and “thank you.” v Continually fall in love with your partner. v Don’t be so quick to judge. v Don’t give 50 percent; give 100 percent. v Don’t bad mouth your partner to other people. v Don’t expect them to read your mind. v Make sure your partner is your best friend, no matter what.

Marriage preparation guidelines for the Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux will start off with a firm foundation, with an understanding of how God intended marriage to be, and how God desires us to live out our marriage vocation. v Engaged Encounter Weekend Retreat in the surrounding dioceses 4. Phase Four: Completion of marriage prep process with priest/deacon will: v Discuss with you what you have learned and experienced at your formal marriage preparation program. v Discuss with you your understanding of sacrament in light of your formal marriage preparation. v Discuss with you your responsibilities as members of God’s people, as spouses and future parents. v Complete all documentary requirements. As appropriate, grant permission for mixed marriage and/or apply for appropriate permissions or dispensations. v Discuss the reception of penance and holy Eucharist as a fitting preparation for the sacrament of matrimony. v Finalize the wedding liturgy and discuss the wedding rehearsal.

For more information and future marriage preparation days in the diocese, go to https://www.htdiocese.org/major-life-moments and http://www. engagedencounter.org/ for dates available for weekend retreats. BC

v Instead of finding the “perfect” person, find who’s right for you. v Understand what makes your partner feel loved. v Treat your partner as if they’re the love of your life.

Gratitude Prayer for

Married Couples Dear Lord, Thank you for marriage.

I pray right now that I would always have a heart of thankfulness.

I realize that thankfulness and gratitude fuel joy in my heart!

Help me to be appreciative of my spouse.

I pray that there would be encouraging words on my tongue to share with my spouse.

I am thankful for my spouse’s love, hard work and encouragement.

Holy Spirit, fill my heart with gratitude.

May you help me to be thankful every day in Jesus’ name.

AMEN! MICHAEL TORTORICH PHOTOGRAPHY

60 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Marriage

“Just Wait”: A letter from a newlywed couple

By VALERIE AND ROCCO REPETSKI Dear The Dating, The Engaged, The Married, Valerie: “Just wait. It’ll get worse when you’re married.” “Just wait until you’ve been married for a year …”

“Just wait until the seven-year itch …”

“Just wait until you’ve been married as long as we have …”

The “just wait until …” scale seems to be sliding further and further away no matter how long you’ve been married. My husband, Rocco, and I have been married for a little over a year and a half and are determined to tell anyone who will listen just how amazing marriage is! Marriage is a gift from God! Rocco: I can’t count how many times I’ve heard “Oh, you’re engaged? Congratulations, but just wait for marriage …” or “Oh, you’re newlyweds? Congratulations, but just wait until after the ‘honeymoon’ phase …” These are messages delivered with a sense of impending doom. At work or elsewhere, these “just waits” are often accompanied by comments about “the old ball and chain,” snide remarks about spouses, and all kinds of dubious marriage advice.

Valerie: I guess we are never quite married long enough to be considered to know what married life is like, but we would disagree.

At no point do Rocco and I think we know everything about marriage. We are learning more and more about one another and about married life every day. But to those who are engaged, to those who are dating, to those who believe their vocation is to one day get married, to those who have already spoken those vows, take heart: Marriage is an amazing, life changing, ridiculously fun adventure!

Rocco: I’m on a mission: God created me to love Val and sacrifice my life for her. He created her to be my perfect match and for those whom God calls to the vocation of marriage, He’s created a perfect match for you as well.

Forget anything you’ve heard from people who’ve become disillusioned

MICHAEL TORTORICH PHOTOGRAPHY

and instead “just wait” for the joy, the excitement, the laughter, and the sheer fun of what’s to come!

Just wait … until you come home and your husband, who has just come home from work, has the fire going in the fireplace, Christmas lights plugged in and hot chocolate set out for you.

Just wait … until you come home to a house full of balloons and a gigantic card on your birthday and you realize how hard your wife worked to see your joy and that she’s been planning this moment for a long time.

Just wait … until she hatches a plan to feed the homeless and you remember how much you love her generosity and compassion.

Just wait … until you open your lunch bag to read the love note she wrote you that morning.

Just wait … until your husband comes home from work and the first thing he does is run, literally run, to find you, lift you up in an embrace, spin you around, and give you a “hello” kiss.

Just wait … until your husband pulls a dozen beautiful red roses from behind his back, in the middle of the week, for no other reason than he loves you and knows you love surprises.

Just wait … until when you serve food for the two of you and she insists you have the warmer dinner, the choicest portion of meat, and the bigger cookie, just because she loves to see you smile.

Just wait … until he changes his

routine and brings his laptop over to work with you on the couch because he knows you enjoy his presence.

Just wait … until you two really realize for the first time that you are not just “her” family, not just “your” family, but your own family.

Just wait … until your husband tells you every day that you’re his most beautiful bride and he’s the luckiest guy in the world.

Just wait … until she giggles every time you surprise her with kisses on her cheek.

Just wait … until your husband asks to hold a friend’s baby for the first time, and he instantly melts, and you are reminded for the billionth time how good of a dad he will be one day.

Just wait … until you see your wife cradling a friend’s infant in her arms, and she instantly knows everything to do to calm him, and you are reminded for the billionth time how good of a mom she will be one day.

Just wait … because you have so much joy ahead of you … .

About the authors Valerie is a worship leader in the Washington, D.C., area and is the music director for campus ministry at George Washington University. (www.valerierepetski.com) Rocco is an engineer and does youth ministry with Youth Apostles, a community of Catholic men. This article originally appeared on http://valerierepetski. com/blog/ and is used with permission.

BC

March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 61

Marriage

Common values

By SUSAN VOGT My husband and I have been married 35 years and have led marriage preparation programs for 30 of those years. We estimate that over that time we’ve prepared over 5,000 couples for marriage. I’m not sure if that makes us experts or outdated and, therefore, irrelevant. I can tell you the obvious – that times have changed and we have changed.

Early in my career, when I taught high school or college students about marriage, I’d say that communication was the key in choosing a mate and keeping a marriage healthy. I’ve changed my mind.

Good communication is not enough Yes, good communication is essential to a thriving marriage, but, it is not sufficient and probably not the most important criteria for choosing a mate.

I say this because in my counseling I repeatedly came across couples who had learned the right communication skills and could use them. They knew how to use “I statements,” listen to the whole person, and use active listening.

They were often fine, caring men and women, but they had serious difficulty living together happily - not at the beginning, but after several years.

The bottom line often came down to either very different personalities or very different values. The other significant variable was the inability of at least one partner to make a lasting commitment.

Personalities cannot easily be changed, so it’s a red flag when dating couples have very different personalities.

Complementary personalities, however, can also be an advantage. For example, she’s a talker, he’s a listener; or he’s a detail person, she sees the big picture. Often people with different personalities can work out accommodations as long as the difference is not too extreme or on too many different fronts. I tell my

KIMBRALI BOYD PHOTOGRAPHY

students that it’s fine to differ on one or two elements of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, but if you differ on three or four and the differences are great, you’ll probably have a lot of stress in your marriage.

Common values, however, can be a deal breaker. If one spouse values a simple lifestyle and the other values accumulating wealth, it doesn’t matter how well they communicate, their basic life orientation will present constant opportunities for conflict. If one spouse values faith and the other resents religion, conflict is inevitable. This doesn’t mean that both spouses have to have the same religion, but both must value a spiritual dimension of life.

Another important common value is one’s attitude towards having children. One partner may really want children and feels marriage would not be complete without a child, while the other is ambivalent or, worse, thinks children would impinge upon their

62 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

lifestyle. Good communication can only clarify this difference, not solve it.

Likewise, if one spouse believes that career is the top priority and the other puts family first, the argument will be eternal - either by outward criticism and fighting or by going underground with general dissatisfaction or depression.

Whether one spouse should stay home with young children is a subcategory of this issue.

Different beliefs about respect for human life and other moral values are deeply rooted. Getting new information and talking through differences usually only lead spouses to realize that they have vastly different life goals and values. These will not change without violating one’s integrity and conscience.

Yes, communication is vital, and if couples don’t have good communication skills, learning them can be a marriage saver. But if the values are significantly different, it’s unlikely that even the best communication will be enough.

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Marriage

Is it too late?

This is fine, you may say, for engaged couples who have not yet made a marriage commitment, but what about us married couples? Is it too late? Can value differences be fixed or changed?

The answer is that prevention is always preferable but seldom is a situation hopeless. A lot depends on the severity of differences and whether there are compromises that both spouses can tolerate.

I would never want a spouse to violate his/her conscience in order to please a mate, but sometimes one spouse may be too scrupulous. Over time they may learn that not everything is black and white. On the other hand, a spouse who rationalizes away ethical decisions, saying they are unimportant, may, with commitment and effort, develop a more sensitive conscience. It’s not easy, though, since these are lifelong behavioral patterns.

Sometimes a couple can agree to disagree on a few values and live their lives in different spheres. For example, one night a week she goes to a prayer group and he plays his favorite sport.

He supports her and does not interfere with her Sunday worship, even though he doesn’t find it important for himself.

Most serious value differences require counseling. That’s the bottom line.

Try a short exercise to determine how close you and your spouse are on basic marriage values.

Common Values Assessment Circle the values that are most important to you. Consider that some values may initially appeal to you but

KIMBRALI BOYD PHOTOGRAPHY

upon deeper reflection (the statement that follows each value) you realize that you don’t always hold them as a priority. Then rank them in importance from 1-14. Discuss with your fiancé or spouse.

1. Honesty. Yes, but sometimes it’s OK to fudge.

2. Commitment. Sure, but some commitments are just too hard to keep.

3. Fidelity. I don’t plan on having an affair but who knows the future.

4. Loyalty. It might be necessary to violate a loyalty if another’s safety is at risk.

5. Devotion to parents. Parents are important, but spouse comes first.

6. Generosity. I’ll give, but only after I’ve taken care of myself.

7. Peacemaking. Sometimes evil needs to be confronted, even with violence.

8. Living simply. I work hard for my

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money. Why can’t I enjoy its rewards?

9. Kindness. Some people are too kind and others take advantage of them.

10. Self-control. I believe in being flexible and spontaneous, not being uptight.

11. Education. Education is overrated. I wouldn’t sacrifice current wants for it.

12. Sacrifice. Suffering and delayed gratification have no use and are to be avoided.

13. Friendship. Friends are nice, but family and spouse are more important.

14. Children. I value my freedom more.

About the author Susan Vogt is an author and speaker on marriage, parenting, and spirituality. Her website is SusanVogt. net. BC

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 63

Marriage

Frequently asked questions by engaged couples Engagement is a time to discern marriage actively

How do I know if I’m ready to marry? n Do most people consider you emotionally mature, able to compromise, communicate well, share your feelings, and handle anger constructively? n Do you love this other person so much that you are willing to put his or her happiness before your own? n Are you marrying out of strength (I know who I am and am happy with myself) rather than weakness (I need someone to fill the gaps in my personality)? n Have you developed strong friendships that have lasted over time? n Are you able to keep commitments and delay gratification? n Do you struggle on a regular basis with harmful habits or addictions, e.g. to alcohol, drugs or pornography?

That’s not necessarily a reason not to marry, but it is something that left untreated can seriously weaken your ability to have a healthy marriage. n Is God calling you to marriage?

Have you prayed and discerned about this?

How do I know if this is the right person? n Do you share similar basic values about respecting human life, fidelity, commitment, what’s right and wrong, honesty, life goals and lifestyle? n Does your significant other bring out the best in you, and you in him or her? n Are you physically attracted to this person? n Can you imagine growing old together? n Do your trusted family members and friends support your relationship and affirm that it’s healthy and respectful? n Do you experience ongoing conflict or, worse, violence and abuse in your relationship? That is a red flag to slow down and seek advice and help, ensuring your safety if necessary.

n Is God calling you to marriage with this person? Have you prayed and discerned about this?

Is it necessary to feel “chemistry” between us for this to be the right person to marry?

Chemistry, or feeling like you “click” with another person, is a natural part of a deepening relationship, and a wonderful part of falling in love, but unfortunately, chemistry is sometimes confused with infatuation, which can be fleeting.

In the good sense, chemistry means you feel a strong physical and emotional attraction to the other person and want to become closer to him or her. You feel happy in his or her presence and enjoy your time together. This sense of unity and joy at the other’s presence can be a great foundation for a happy marriage.

In contrast, infatuation means you

64 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

are consumed with thinking of the other person to the point of doing silly or risky actions to be together. You are blind to the faults of the other and consumed with being noticed by him or her. Your need to be liked is so strong that you are willing to give up your own personality or morals for the other’s affection. Often infatuation is an unequal relationship between the object of adulation and the infatuated person. If this describes your relationship, you may want to step back and reevaluate.

Doesn’t living together before marriage prevent me from marrying the wrong person and thus getting divorced later on?

Although it may sound counterintuitive, studies show that cohabiting couples: n Increase their risk of

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Marriage

breaking up after marriage (46 percent higher divorce rate) n Increase the risk of domestic violence for women, and the risk of physical and sexual abuse for children n Have lower levels of happiness and well-being compared to married couples Why should I attend a marriage preparation program?

We’ve known each other for a long time and can’t imagine we’d learn anything new.

You don’t have to discover all the things that make a marriage work by trial and error. Others have done some of that work for you. At a marriage prep program, you get a glimpse into other couples’ marriages so you can have a more realistic sense of what’s normal and what’s not, and you can get solid advice on how to have a happy, holy marriage.

Although every marriage relationship is unique, there are many tips experienced couples can share that will help you when you face bumps in your own marriage. Marriage preparation programs also give you an opportunity to talk with each other about the wide spectrum of “must-have conversations” before marriage. You’ve probably talked about most of them, but you may have avoided a few. This is a time to check yourselves.

Most likely you will find that you gain confidence in your decision to marry as a result of attending a marriage preparation program. Occasionally, attending a marriage preparation program can make you realize that it isn’t the right time to marry, or that

MICHAEL TORTORICH PHOTOGRAPHY

this may not be the right person.

That’s okay, because engagement is a time to discern marriage actively and intentionally.

How much income should we have between us to marry?

Many couples, especially younger ones, start their married lives together without a large income, and possibly with debt. This can be a challenge, but it shouldn’t necessarily delay marriage.

There’s no magic number when it comes to the income and financial assets a couple should have before marrying, and bride and groom promise to be faithful “for richer” or “for poorer.” At the same time, it’s important to realize that financial hardship can cause conflict in a marriage, and to talk with each other about your plan for meeting

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your basic needs. Don’t be afraid to seek wise counsel if you’re not sure how you’ll make ends meet.

How much does a typical wedding cost?

Many wedding planners will tell you that the average wedding costs between $20,000-$30,000, but it definitely doesn’t have to! Although the ante has been rising as to what is considered “typical” for a wedding, simplicity can be elegant. Consider asking friends and family for help on your big day, having a smaller wedding if cost is a major concern, or researching inexpensive do-it-yourself alternatives. Don’t let the perceived cost of weddings keep you from saying “I do.” And remember, a wedding is a day; a marriage is a lifetime. BC

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March 2020 • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • Bayou Catholic • 65

Marriage

Changing your spouse and yourself

By LAURI PRZYBYSZ They say that when a man marries a woman, he thinks, “She’s the one I’ve been waiting for. She’ll never change.”

– and she always does. And a woman looks at her man, and thinks, “He just needs a little work; after we’re married, I’ll help him change” – and he never does.

The truth is that both men and women will change as time goes on.

Biologists tell us that every seven years we have totally replaced all the cells in our bodies with new ones. Our ideas, politics, interests have evolved over the years. While research shows that personality tendencies (like introversion/extroversion) remain fairly constant throughout our adult lives, we still do change. Personal change and growth can become issues in marriage because we develop at different rates. We hope our spouses will change for the better: become more patient; stop unhealthy habits; spend more time with the family; work less – or more; go to church more – or less, talk more – or less. We are all works in progress.

Change sometimes doesn’t happen fast enough to suit us. Your beloved may be oblivious to your dissatisfaction.

If he or she doesn’t realize the need to change something, a loving spouse can gently ask for change. Nagging, cajoling, and arguing, however, get us nowhere and can make us even more miserable. Successful couples recognize that the only person you can change is yourself.

Enlist your spouse as your partner in self-change. When you are willing to change some behavior, tell your spouses about your plan to change and enlist their support. Energy for marital growth can be ignited in your marriages. Our spouses, no matter

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what personal faults or issues they may have, will appreciate our efforts (they’ve been hoping we would!).

What if your self-change strategy doesn’t light a fire under your spouse?

Despite your hopes and personal improvement efforts, he or she is resistant or unable to change. This is where the most powerful – and paradoxical – tool of marital change is at your service: Acceptance. When spouses show each other love and acceptance they respond more quickly to each other’s changes.

66 • Bayou Catholic • Diocese of Houma-Thibodaux • March 2020

Be ready to support any effort your spouse makes toward change, no matter how tentative or incomplete that effort is. If he or she discloses a desire to change, be ready to help and not hinder the process. It may be that professional help is in order, but your role as helpmate is indispensable. You are the one who loves your spouse the most.

About the author Lauri Przybysz is the coordinator of Marriage & Family Enrichment for the Archdiocese of Baltimore. BC

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