Nurturing the Gifted Issue No.13

目錄 TABLE OF CONTENTS 最新消息 What’s New

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專題研習 Feature Article

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編者的話 Editor’s Note 家長講座暨家長學堂證書頒授 2014 Parent Seminar and Parent Education Programme Certificates Presentation 2014

小信息，大影響：培養適應力強的完美主義者 方蔚子博士 Small Messages, Big Impact: Nurturing Adaptive Perfectionists Ricci W. FONG (Ph.D.)

研究分享 Research Corner

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專家分享 Professional Sharing

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完美六何 5W1H in Perfectionism

培育完美主義者：協助完美主義兒童的應對策略 香港資優教育學苑 程永德先生 Parenting Perfecionist: Coping Strategies To Help These Children Mr. Victor Ching, Educational Psychologist, The HKAGE

「童」一天空 My Corner 1 力求完美 Being Perfect

2 完美主義 Perfectionism

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家長園地 Parent Zone

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資源推介 What’s Recommended

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完美的追求﹕從五歲到十三歲 Pursuing Perfectionism: From 5 to 13 years old Letting go of Perfect: Overcoming Perfectionism in Kids

活動花絮 Event Highlights 學院動向 Forthcoming Academy Events

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編者的話•Editor’s Note

編者的話

繼上期《資優樂》專題探討資優兒的生涯規劃後，今期《資優樂》將會 探討資優兒的完美主義。如果你錯過了上一期《資優樂》，歡迎到本學 苑網站的「家長園地」下載。 資優兒常有完美主義的特質，完美主義通常分為健康完美主義和不健康 完美主義，健康完美主義的資優兒對自己要求很高，目標也訂立得很 高，但當他們未能達到目標時，卻可以理解及接受，更會為自己訂立更 合理的目標，這種健康完美主義不但能令他們力求上進，而且能提升他 們戰勝逆境的能力。相反，不健康完美主義的資優兒往往對自己的失敗 耿耿於懷，覺得自己做事並不完美，更會因懼怕未能達標而拒絕嘗試， 避免失敗。作為家長，應該怎樣於健康與不健康的完美主義中取得平 衡，培育子女成為健康的完美主義者，協助他們調節目標和建立合理的 期望呢？ 今期《資優樂》主題為「資優兒特質：探索完美主義」，專題剖析資優 兒的完美主義特質和需要，以及處理完美主義特質的方法和策略，從而 協助他們建立合理及正面的人生目標及積極的做事態度。我們很榮幸邀 請了香港大學博士後研究員方蔚子博士為我們撰寫「專題研習」， 探討資優兒的完美主義特質及分享一些與他們相處的小貼士。在「研究 分享」，我們會深入探討「完美六何」的概念，希望加深家長對各種完 美主義特質的了解。另外，今期「專家分享」邀請了本苑的教育心理學 家程永德先生分享他對培育完美主義資優兒的看法，從而協助家長了解 孩子的特質。同時，我們亦邀請了兩位學生為大家分享他們對完美主義 的 看 法 ， 希 望 家 長 透 過 他 們 的 故 事 對 完美主義 有 多 一 份 了 解 。 最 後，「家長園地」則邀請了一位家長分享她與兒子的一段對話，對話中 兒子談及對完美主義的看法及「它」怎樣成就一段成功的學習歷程。 另外，本學苑將於2014年7月12日(星期六)下午2時半至下午4時半舉行家 長講座暨家長學堂證書頒授2014，屆時我們邀請香港城市大學應用社會科 學系助理教授許娜娜博士主講，題目為「資優兒的個人發展」。報名詳情 將稍後於本學苑網站內的「家長園地」公佈。網址：www.hkage.org.hk。

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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編者的話•Editor’s Note

Editor’s Note

In the previous issue of Nurturing the Gifted, we featured career planning for gifted children.

In this issue, we will discuss perfectionism in gifted children. To refresh your memory, you are welcome to download the previous issue of Nurturing the Gifted from the Parent Zone of the HKAGE website.

Perfectionism is a common characteristic among gifted children. It can be divided into two types, healthy and unhealthy perfectionism. Healthy perfectionists have high expectations and set high standards for themselves, yet also show the ability to understand and accept the failure of achieving goals as well as to learn from mistakes in order to set achievable standards.

Healthy perfectionism enables them to strive for excellence and enhances their resilience.

In contrast, unhealthy perfectionists have little tolerance for failure and think they are never good enough. They may refuse to try simply because of the fear for failure. As parents, how can you strike a balance between healthy and unhealthy perfectionism to nurture your children to be healthy perfectionists, helping them adjust their goals and set realistic expectations?

Themed around “Exploring Perfectionism in Gifted Children”, this issue analyses the perfectionist traits and needs of gifted children and introduces methods and strategies for dealing with perfectionism in order to help them set realistic and ambitious life goals and build up a positive attitude. This time we have the privilege of inviting Dr. Ricci Fong, a Postdoctoral Fellow

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

in The University of Hong Kong, to write the Feature Article that examines the perfectionist traits of gifted children and give us some handy tips on getting along with these children. In Research Corner, we explore the concept of 5W1H in perfectionism in detail, aiming to deepen parents’ understanding about different perfectionist characteristics. In Professional Sharing, the Educational Psychologist of the HKAGE shares his views on nurturing perfectionistic gifted children, giving parents an insight into the characteristics of these children.

Also, we have invited two secondary students to share their views on perfectionism and hopefully their stories will help parents explore the world of gifted children. Lastly, in Parent Zone, a parent shares a conversation between her and her son, in which her son mentions how he thinks about perfectionism and how perfectionism has spurred him on to success in learning.

We will organise our Parent Seminar and Certificates Presentation 2014 on 12 July 2014 (Saturday) from 2:30 to 4:30 p.m. Dr. HUI, Na Na Anna, Assistant Professor in the Department of Applied Social Studies, City University of Hong Kong, will be invited to deliver a speech on “Personal Development of Gifted Children”. The registration details will be announced shortly on the Parent Zone of the HKAGE website (www.hkage.org.hk).

最新消息•What’s New

家長講座暨家長學堂證書頒授2014

Parent Seminar and Parent Education Programme Certificates Presentation 2014

資優兒的個人發展

Personal Development of Gifted Children 日期 Date

2014年7月12日(星期六) 12th July 2014 (Saturday)

時間 Time

下午二時三十分至下午四時三十分 2:30-4:30p.m.

地點 Venue

講者 Speaker

香港新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑105室 Room105, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Shatin, New Territories, Hong Kong 許娜娜博士 香港城市大學應用社會科學系助理教授 Dr. HUI, Anna Na Na Assistant Professor, Department of Applied Social Studies, City University of Hong Kong

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專題研習•Feature Article

小信息，大影響：

培養適應力強的完美主義者 完美主義是資優教育領域中一個不能小覷的性格特質。許多資優生在某程度 上都是完美主義者。然而，完美主義並非資優或高成就學生所獨有的，即使 是沒有背負資優標纖的家長、教師和學生都可以擁有這種特質。過去幾十年 的研究顯示，倘若子女出現完美主義傾向，則其父母在當中擔當了關鍵的角 色。因此，家長必須了解完美主義的本質，以及適應不良或非健康型完美主 義如何在資優生的日常生活中萌發。你是否正在培養一個完美的孩子呢？更 重要的是，你是否正在培育一個適應力強（健康）的完美孩子呢？本文章旨 在給家長一些啟示，使他們能引導資優生遠離完美主義的陰暗面。 了解完美主義者 「完美主義永不可能是健康 的」(Greenspon,2002)，真 的嗎？時至今日，雖然研究員 還未就完美主義的本質及解釋 達成一致的共識，但是在各種 觀點之間卻存在著共同點。首 先，完美主義是一個多維及屬 於特定領域的概念。所有完美 主義者都追求高表現標準，而 關鍵的是他們如何看待錯誤和 失敗。當適應力強或健康型完 美主義者無法達到他們所訂立 的高標準時，他們能理智地評 核自己的表現，並能重新設定 仍然崇高但切實的目標。他們 較能從錯誤中汲取教訓，以及 認同家庭、老師及朋輩所提供 的支持和資源。他們知道追 求更美好的自己並不是一個孤 獨的旅程，而且在旅途中的顛

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

簸都是難能可貴的障礙，跨過 後就會邁向成功的未來。適應 力強的完美主義者通常較具自 信、較善於交際、對生活較滿 意，而且心理也較健康。 相反，適應不良或非健康型的 完美主義者則傾向於鍥而不捨 地追求其遠大的目標，但不會 為進步而進行許多理性的評估 及訂立可行的計劃。因此，當 他們無法達到不切實際的目標 時，就很容易失去繼續前進的 動力，因為他們會視自己為絕 對的失敗者，認為自己沒有 甚麼機會從失敗中恢復過來。 對於他們大部分人來說，其他 人的愛與支持取決於自己的表 現，而尋求他人協助則是表現 懦弱的羞恥行為。這些不正確 的信念正正是迫使他們面對社

專題研習•Feature Article

交、情緒甚至學業問題的原因。適應不良型的完 美主義者通常有迴避行為、社交排斥、潛能未 展、抑鬱及焦慮問題。話雖如此，大量實證證據 顯示，完美主義能作為學生發展的催化劑而不是 絆腳石；不過，前提是培育兒童成為適應力強， 即健康型的完美主義者。最終目標不應該是徹底 消除資優生的完美主義傾向，而是要推動他們成 為適應力強的完美主義者，同時削弱他們適應不 良的觀念。

有其父必有其子 完美主義是關係性的。對資優生來說，遺傳天性的 影響固然舉足輕重，但同時父母，尤其母親更擔當 了塑造其完美主義傾向的角色。孩子不但在外表上 會跟父母相似，而且會在思考、觀念、認知和日常 生活中的應對方面仿效其父母。很多時候，父母向 子女傳遞了細微但強力的信息，導致他們變成適 應不良型完美主義者，卻懵然不知。父母對失敗、 壓力和成功的處理手法，都會成為資優生所參照的 重要標準。一個學生在擦掉文字後為稍微皺了的一 頁紙顯得焦慮不安，要是他有一個對整潔特別執著 的母親，實在不足為奇。同樣地，一個喜歡請教別 人的學生要是有一對虛心學習的父母，也是見怪不 怪。家長要培養孩子成為適應力強的完美主義者， 首要反省自己的觀念與實踐。 當事情無法如你所願時，你會怎樣做和有甚麼情 緒反應呢？ 你努力不懈是為了向別人證明自己的能力，還是 為了自我提升呢？ 你是否非常善於識別瑕疵？除了瑕疵外，你是否 了解過程和結果所帶來的好處？ 尤其在孩子面前，你會否承認自己的失敗和弱 點？ 你是否很容易焦躁不安？

你還不夠盡善盡美 資優生很少覓得真朋友，原因是他們表現出眾， 而且很可能有完美主義的特質。有些完美主義者

未必特別執著於自己的表現，但對別人卻期望很 高。舉例來說，一位名叫Natalie的小學女生在學 校裡遇到許多社交問題，因而到小四時已經須要 兩度轉校。她在學校裡確實一個朋友都沒有，因 為沒有同學夠資格當她的朋友，他們不是過分幼 稚，就是愚昧無知、亂七八糟或是反應遲鈍。自 年幼開始，Natalie便無法理解為何同儕總是為了 單單一個數學概念消耗許多時間；為何他們無法 把字寫得工整點；為何他們如此喜歡在小息時玩 捉迷藏。她覺得跟同班同學做朋友是浪費時間的 事，不過同學對她也沒有甚麼好感。 無論你的孩子是如何天賦異稟，都需要知道對資 優生來說，社交支援能為他們織出一張安全網， 讓他們在遇到情緒和學業問題時可以倚靠。先前 不少研究顯示，適應力強的完美主義者最具自 信、對生活最為滿意，也能取得最高成就，原因 是他們能承認家庭、同儕和老師的支持有助他們 在校內校外取得進步及優異成績。在Natalie的 個案中，她忽略了的是事情的另一面—同儕的正 面特質。由於資優生和完美主義者通常對細節一 絲不苟，也可能對別人寄予厚望，因此很容易把 焦點集中在別人的缺點或瑕疵上。對他們而言， 一個微不足道的瑕疵就如灑在一張完美白紙上的 一滴邪惡墨水—細小卻破壞力強。然而，他們應 該注意的是，他們確實住在一個人人各具所長的 社會，這是他們必須學習接納和適應的事實。這 就是說，我們需要讓資優生明白所有人是如何獨 一無二，而且都或多或少有些瑕疵。協助資優生 了解別人的優點，以及看清自己的缺點，可引導 他們接受人與人的差異，並建立更正面的人際關 係。

我是資優…… 許多資優生都在連串成功，以及別人的肯定和讚 賞中成長，潛能未展者則另作別論。除了驕傲以 外，資優身分和成功的往績既可能變成他們的財 富，也可能成為他們的負擔。他們似乎認為自 己無論如何都不會遭遇失敗。特別是對於適應不 良型完美主義者來說，過往的經歷或會令他們覺 得，別人(包括父母)給予他們多少愛與支持主要是 取決於他們的表現。另外，有些資優生則會因為 Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專題研習•Feature Article

不想令父母失望而追求完美。這種壓力會與日俱增，一來因為他們在 資優領域中累積了更多成功經驗，二來因為他們踏入青春期後通常 會更渴望在群體中受到歡迎，繼而減少向身邊重要的人透露其負面感 覺。為了不負別人所望，很多資優生對錯誤和失敗變得過份執著。對 於他們來說，輕微的錯誤便足以令他們變成失敗者。可是，當他們越 追求完美，就會越害怕在別人面前成為失敗者，處事也變得更不切實 際、雜亂無章。優秀的表現為他們帶來正面的自我形象和社會支持。 然而，假如他們將注意力過份集中在資優生預期的責任上，就會令他 們忽略了真正等待作為他們後盾的支持網絡。此外，認為錯誤總是阻 礙他們表現完美這偏執的信念，可對其心理健康、動力及表現構成負 面影響。 你有向你的資優孩子清楚表達自己的期望嗎？ 你有指引他們訂立具體可行的目標，以及為取得進步而計劃建設性 的步驟嗎？ 你的資優孩子在場時，你會在別人面前自豪地談及他們出色的表現嗎？

最後一點 除了當資優孩子的好榜樣外，若能為他們找到值得信賴或欣賞的人， 去跟他們分享生命中遇過的挫折及如何克服種種人生挑戰，將對他們 有很大裨益。同樣地，讓他們接觸偉人的傳記故事，也可鼓舞他們的 心。人生課能令他們明白，不管一個人多成功或德高望重，在人生中 都總會遭遇失敗和困難。人無完人，也無人天生卓爾不群。 就像要一隻蠔形成一粒閃閃發亮的珍珠，需要一顆沙粒入侵並經年 累月才會成事一樣，錯誤和挫折能為資優生帶來有助益、有意義的 人生課，砥礪他們的技能，並琢磨他們未來的嘗試。你有否鼓勵你 的資優孩子接納並克服人生的不如意事呢？

方蔚子博士 參考文獻 Greenspon, T. S. (2002). Freeing our families from perfectionism. Minneapolis, MN: Free Spirit Publishing.

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

專題研習•Feature Article

Small Messages, Big Impact:

Nurturing Adaptive erfectionists Author:

Perfectionism is a personality trait that cannot be neglected in the realm of gifted education. Many gifted learners are perfectionistic in one way or another. It is, however, not a characteristic exclusive to gifted and high-achieving learners, but one that could be found in parents, teachers and students who do not bear the gifted label.

The past few decades of research have told us that parents play a crucial role in the formation of perfectionism in their children.

It is therefore necessary for parents to understand the nature of perfectionism and how the maladaptive or unhealthy form of perfectionism sprouts and grows in gifted learners in their everyday life. Are you nurturing a perfect child? And more importantly, are you bringing up an adaptive (healthy) perfect child? This article attempts to offer some insights into how parents can guide gifted learners away from the dark side of perfectionism.

Ricci W. FONG (Ph.D.)

Understanding Perfectionists “Perfectionism is never healthy” (Greenspon, 2002), is that really so? Today, although researchers have not arrived at a unanimous consensus regarding the nature and interpretation of perfectionism, there are common grounds among the variation of views. In the first instance, perfectionism is multidimensional and domain-specific. While all perfectionists strive for high performance standards, what matters is how perfectionists perceive mistakes and failures. Adaptive or healthy perfectionists are able to logically evaluate their performance and set high but realistic goals when they fail to live up to the high standards they set previously. They are more able to acknowledge the lessons learnt from their previous mistakes, as well as the support and resources offered by their family, teachers and peers. They know that their pursuit of a better self is not a solitary journey and the bumps they encounter in the journey are valuable hurdles that they have to leap over for future success. Adaptive perfectionists are often found to be more confident, more sociallyconnected, more satisfied with life and are

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專題研習•Feature Article

psychologically healthier.

Maladaptive or unhealthy perfectionists, on the other hand, tend to persist with their ambitious goals without much sensible evaluation and feasible plans for improvement. As a result, their inability to meet the unrealistic goals can easily dampen their motivation to move on as they will then see themselves as an absolute loser who has little chance to revive from failure. To many of them, love and support from others are contingent upon their performance and seeking help from others is a shameful act of weakness.

It is these maladaptive beliefs that drive perfectionists toward social, emotional and even academic problems. Maladaptive perfectionists are often identified with avoidance behaviors, social rejection, underachievement, depressive symptoms, and anxiety. Having said that, a wealth of empirical evidence have shown that perfectionism can serve as a catalyst rather than a stumbling block in learners’ development, but the prerequisite is that adaptive perfectionism, the healthy form of perfectionism, is promoted in children’s upbringing. The ultimate goal should not be about eliminating perfectionism as a whole, but about promoting adaptive perfectionism and diminishing the maladaptive beliefs in gifted learners.

Like Parents, Like Children Perfectionism is relational. While the genetic makeup of gifted learners does play a significant role, parents, particularly mothers, are like the sculptors of children’s perfectionistic orientation.

Children do not only resemble the physical features of their parents, but also the way that parents think, believe, perceive and react in everyday situations.

Very often, parents have left children with small but powerful messages that may prompt them toward maladaptive perfectionism without notice. How parents react in times of failure, stressful situations

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

and success offer influential models for gifted learners to refer to. It is not surprising to find that a student who gets anxious over a slightly crumpled page after erasing the unwanted words has a mother who is very particular about tidiness and cleanliness. Neither is it surprising to find students who enjoy learning from others have parents who are humble learners. To parents, one of the first steps to nurturing adaptive perfectionism in your children is to reflect upon your own beliefs and practices.

What will you do and how will you react emotionally when things don’t turn out the way you wanted?

Do you work hard to prove your abilities to others or mainly for self-improvement?

Are you very good at identifying flaws? Apart from the flaws, do you also appreciate the positive aspects of the process and outcome?

Do you admit your failures and weaknesses, particularly in front of your children?

Do you get agitated easily?

You Are Just Not Good Enough True friends are rare to many gifted learners because of their outstanding performance, and probably also because of their perfectionist characteristics.

Some perfectionists may not be very particular about their own performance, but they have very high expectations of others. For instance, a primary school girl, Natalie, encountered so many social problems at school that she had to transfer to another school twice by Primary 4. She literally had no friends in school because nobody was good enough to be her friend. They were either too childish, too stupid, too untidy, or too slow. Since a very tender age, she could not understand why her peers always took such a long time to understand a single mathematical concept, why they could not

專題研習•Feature Article

write more neatly, and why they liked playing hideand-seek so much during recess. She found it a waste of time to make friends with her classmates, and neither did her peers like her.

However gifted your children are, it is important to note that social support can provide gifted learners with a safety net to lean back on in times of emotional and academic difficulties. In many previous studies, adaptive perfectionists were found to be the most confident, the most satisfied with life, and the highest achievers because they are able to acknowledge the family, peer and teacher support as resources that can facilitate them to make improvements and excel within and beyond the school context. In Natalie’s case, what she overlooked is the other side of the coin - the positive characteristics of her peers. Since gifted learners and perfectionists are usually very attentive to details and they may set very high goals for others, it is easy for them to place their focus solely on others’ weaknesses and flaws.

To them, a minor flaw could mean the sinful jot of ink that is spilt on a perfect white piece of paper - small but possibly destructive. However, it is important to note that they are indeed living in a society with people of various abilities and this is the reality they must learn to accept and live with. That said, we need to guide gifted learners to understand how all of us are unique, different, and flawed in one way or another. Helping gifted learners to see the virtues of others, as well as the imperfect part of themselves can lead them to accepting individual differences and establishing more positive social relationships.

burdens to them. It may appear that they are never supposed to lose in anything, anyway.

Particularly to the maladaptive perfectionists, their previous experiences may inform them that the amount of love and support they get from others, including those from their parents, rely heavily on their performance. Others may strive for perfection because they do not want to let their parents down. Such pressure escalates as they accumulate more successful experiences in their gifted domains, and very often, as they disclose less of their negative feelings to their important others while the need for social popularity grows during puberty. In order to live up to the expectations they perceive from others, many gifted learners become overly conscious of mistakes and failures. To them, a small mistake can make them a loser. But the more they strive for perfection, they more they fear to become a loser in front of others, the less realistic and strategic they become in handling a task. Excellence comes with positive self and positive social support. Their narrow focus on the

I am GIFTED… Apart from the underachievers, many gifted learners grow up in showers of success, recognition and appraisal from others. Alongside pride, their gifted identity and track record of success may become both assets and Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專題研習•Feature Article

expected duty of gifted learners will blind them from the support network that is actually waiting to back them up. And the persistent belief that it is these mistakes that always stand between them and their perfect performance could be detrimental to their psychological well-being, motivation and performance.

Are you making your expectations clear to your gifted children?

Are you guiding them to set concrete, feasible goals and plan constructive steps for improvement?

In front of others and in the presence of your gifted children, will you proudly talk about your children’s outstanding performance?

On The Last Note Apart from serving as a good role model for your gifted children, having someone they trust or admire to share their setbacks in life and how they eventually overcame the different life challenges will be very valuable. Similarly, exposing them to biographical stories of great people can be inspiring as well. Through life lessons, they can understand that failures and difficult encounters fall on everyone’s life, however successful or respectable the person is. Nobody is perfect, and nobody is excellent by nature.

Just as it takes an intrusive grain of sand and years of coating for a lustrous pearl to form in an oyster, mistakes and setbacks can offer constructive and meaningful lessons for gifted learners to polish their skills and refine their future attempts. Are you encouraging your gifted children to accept and overcome the unwelcome encounters in life?

Ricci W. FONG (Ph.D.) Reference Greenspon, T. S. (2002). Freeing our families from perfectionism. Minneapolis, MN: Free Spirit Publishing.

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

研究分享•Research Corner

完

美

六

何

說到完美主義，Hamachek（1978）可算是對這個概念最具影響力的心理學 家之一。Hamachek認為完美主義是指個人對自己的表現訂立高標準或抱有 高期望，並把這想法表現在行為上。他將完美主義分為兩種類型：「正常型 （健康型）」及「神經質型（缺陷型）」。正常型完美主義者能接受失敗和 自己的不完美，因此能從艱鉅的工作中獲得真實的快樂，並能培養出成就感 與自我實現的能力。相反，神經質型完美主義者則永遠覺得自己的表現不夠 好，因此無法從自己的努力中得到滿足感。換言之，正常型完美主義者著眼 於自己的優點，然而神經質型完美主義者則著眼於自己的缺點。

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研究分享•Research Corner

完美主義該如何衡量？ Frost 及其同工（1990）整理了描述完美主義的相關文獻，並根據他們的見解為完 美主義下定義： 「完美主義牽涉到高水平的表現，同時亦帶有對個人行為過度挑剔的傾向。」 （第450頁） Hamachek（1978）將完美主義分類為正常型和神經質型，認為與完美主義 相關的心理問題較可能是由對個人行為吹毛求疵的態度造成，而非對個人行 為訂立高標準（甚至是過高標準）所致。 Frost 及其同工以苛刻的自我批判為 重點，設計出多向度完美主義量表（FMPS）。

誰是完美主義者？ 完美主義量表（FMPS）以六十五個自我評價的陳述組成，並能歸納為以下四 大主題（第405-452頁）： 一. 擔心犯錯（例如：我覺得學業失敗等於做人失敗。） 二. 質疑自己的表現（例如：假如我不為自己訂立最高標準，我最終很可能會 變成一個二等人。） 三. 重視父母的期望及其讚許／批評（例如：父母給我訂下很嚴格的標準。） 四. 過分要求精確無誤、循序漸進及有條不紊（例如：對我來說，做事井井有 條非常重要。）

有關研究在何時何地進行？ FMPS一直廣泛使用於以資優人士為對象的完美主義實證研究。例如，Parker 及Mills（1996）曾經將六百名參加了一項全國人才搜尋/招募計劃的資優六年 級生（相等於香港小學六年級）與四百一十八名就讀同校的同級學生作比較。 由於研究的學生對象就讀同一所學校，因此環境差異對有關研究的影響可以減 到最低。有關研究結果顯示，百分之四十二的學生屬於健康型完美主義者，百 分之三十屬於非完美主義者，而百分之二十八則屬於非健康型完美主義者。 然而，當以同一個計量方法研究捷克資優生的完美主義時，三類完美主義者 的比例卻有所不同。Parker（2000）曾用FMPS將捷克共和國的一百三十二 名資優生跟七十七名普通學生作比較，結果發現非健康型完美主義者比例最 多（佔百分之四十五），其次是健康型完美主義者（佔百分之三十五），而 非完美主義者則最少（佔百分之二十）。 比較不同類型完美主義者在美國與捷克兩國的分布，就會得知完美主義的普 遍性存在著文化差異。相關的文化差異可歸因於不同的教育制度、社會規 範、父母期望等。 為了迎合中國學生的需要，香港中文大學的陳維鄂教授設計了正面與負 面完美主義量表（PNPS-12）。陳維鄂（2007）對完美主義的定義與 Hamachek（1978）的大同小異。他認為，正面／健康型的完美主義者追 求卓越，而負面／不健康型的完美主義者則執泥於完美無瑕，盲目地避免犯 錯。他抽選了二百九十八名中小學資優生進行相關研究，研究結果顯示正面 的完美主義者比負面的多。

A

++

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研究分享•Research Corner

為甚麼我的孩子是個完美主義者？

參考文獻

Frost、Lahart及Rosenblate（1991）探討過家長在孩子發展出完美 主義的過程中扮演了甚麼角色。雖然研究規模較小，但是他們發現 母親的完美主義特質跟孩子的完美主義不無關係。不過，研究結果 顯示父親在這方面對孩子有甚麼影響。

Ablard, K. E., & Parker, W. D. (1997). Parents’ achievement goals and perfectionism in their academically talented children. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 26, 651–667.

另一方面，Parker（2000）曾以FMPS向五百七十八名六年級學生 及其家長進行研究。有關結果顯示，家長對孩子發展出完美主義來 說影響微乎其微。Parker及其同工們相信，為自己訂立遠大目標和 高標準的母親較可能培育出同樣自我要求嚴格的孩子。然而，有完 美主義特質的父親則較可能培育出循規蹈矩、一絲不苟的孩子。 雖然研究沒有發現父母的完美主義特質與孩子的有任何關聯，但是 Ablard及Parker（1997）認為，假如父母側重於表現，則其資優子 女較可能顯示出非健康／缺陷型的完美主義傾向。 H e y m a n 及 D w e c k （1 9 9 2 ）指 出 ， 家 長 傾 向 於 替 其 子 女 訂 立 兩類成就目標：

學習目標取向

Chan, D. W. (2007). Perfectionism among Chinese gifted students in Hong Kong: Relationships to coping strategies and teacher ratings. Gifted Education International, 23, 157-168.

Frost, R. O., Lahart, C. M., & Rosenblate, R. (1991). The development of perfectionism: A study of daughters and their parents.

Cognitive Therapy and Research, 15, 469490.

Frost, R. O., Marten, P., Lahart, C., & Rosenblate, R. (1990). The dimensions of perfectionism. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 14(5), 449-468.

Hamachek, D. E. (1978). Psychodynamics of normal and neurotic perfectionism.

Psychology, 15, 27–33.

表現目標取向

Heyman, G. D., & Dweck, C. S. (1992).

Achievement goals and intrinsic motivation:Their relation and their role in adaptive motivation. Motivation and Emotion, 16, 231–247.

指家長著重於鼓勵子女：

對

指家長看重學業成就，視 之為衡量指標：

Parker, W. D. (2000). Healthy perfectionism in the gifted. Journal of Advanced Academics, 11(4), 173-182.

了解學習內容

比

高分數

Parker, W. D., & Mills, C. J. (1996). The incidence of perfectionism in gifted students.

Gifted Child Quarterly, 40, 194–199.

享受學習 尋求挑戰

獎項 排名

總結 健康型的完美主義是一種正面的人格特質，有這種完美主義的學生 在追求卓越的同時，能接受自己的失敗，並樂於從失敗中學習。相 反，非健康型的完美主義則是一種負面的人格特質，可能會引發強 迫行為，有這種完美主義的學生所訂立的標準極度嚴格苛刻，永遠 覺得自己做得不夠好。過往的研究顯示，家長的期望與完美主義特 質可能與其資優子女的完美主義有關。

反思 作為家長，你對自己的資優子女抱有哪類成就目標？ 什麼較重要？趣味或成績？ 你可以怎樣協助你的資優子女繼續當一個正常 / 健康型的完美主義者？

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研究分享•Research Corner

i n H 1 5W ctioni s m e f r e P

When it comes to perfectionism, Hamachek (1978) is known as one of the most influential psychologists in its conceptualisation. Hamachek referred perfectionism to both individual’s thinking and behaviours associated with high standards or expectations for one’s own performance. He divided perfectionism into 2 types, i.e. Normal (Healthy) and Neurotic (Dysfunctional) perfectionism. Normal perfectionists derive great pleasure from doing challenging tasks and develop a sense of achievement and self-actualisation as they allow themselves to fail and being imperfect; whereas neurotic perfectionists do not experience satisfaction from their efforts because they think they are never good enough. In order words, normal perfectionists focus on their strengths while neurotic perfectionists focus on their deficiencies.

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研究分享•Research Corner

How to measure perfectionism?

Frost and his colleagues (1990) reviewed previous literature on perfectionism and defined perfectionism in their own perspective: “Perfectionism involves high standards of performance which are accompanied by tendencies for overly critical evaluations of their own behaviour.” (p.450) Their definition based heavily on Hamachek’s (1978) categorisation of normal and neurotic perfectionism, suggesting that the perfectionism-related psychological problems were more likely associated with the critical attitude of individuals toward their behaviours instead of the setting of high standards, even if standards were excessively high. Stressing on the heightened self-criticism, Frost and his colleagues developed the Multidimensional Perfectionism Scale (FMPS).

Who is a perfectionist?

FMPS is a 65-item measure grounded on 4 self-critical tendencies (p.450-452): i. Concern with mistakes (e.g. If I fail at school, I am a failure as a person.) ii. Doubt regarding the quality of one’s performance (e.g. If I do not set the highest standards for myself, I am likely to end up a second-rate person.) iii. Considerable value placed on parents’ expectation and their approval/ disapproval (e.g. My parents set very high standards for me.) iv. Overemphasis on precision, order and organisation (e.g. Organisation is very important for me.)

When and where was the research done?

FMPS has been used widely in the empirical investigation of perfectionism in the gifted population.

For example, Parker and Mills (1996) compared 600 gifted 6th grade (equivalent to Primary 6 in Hong Kong) students from a national talent search with 418 6th grade students from the same schools. By comparing students of the same schools, the researchers minimised the environmental discrepancy.

The results showed that 42% of the students were healthy perfectionists, 30% were non-perfectionists and 28% unhealthy perfectionists.

However, when the same measure was used to explore perfectionism in Czech gifted students, a different distribution was found. Parker (2000) compared 142 gifted students with 77 typical students in Czech Republic by using FMPS. The results showed that unhealthy perfectionists was the most common (45%), followed by healthy perfectionists (35%), and non-perfectionists (20%) was the least common.

By comparing the distribution of different types of perfectionists in America and Czech Republic, it can be seen that there are cultural differences in the prevalence in perfectionism. The cultural differences could be attributed to the different educational system, social norms, parental expectation, etc.

In order to cater the needs of local Chinese students, Professor David Chan from the Chinese University of Hong Kong developed the Positive and Negative Perfectionism Scale (PNPS-12). Chan’s (2007) definition of perfectionism is similar to Hamachek’s (1978). Chan proposed that Positive/ Healthy perfectionists are those who strive for excellence whilst Negative/ Unhealthy perfectionists are those who have rigid adherence to perfection and a preoccupation to avoid mistakes. With a sample of 298 primary and secondary gifted students in Hong Kong, the results showed that there are more positive perfectionists than negative perfectionists.

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研究分享•Research Corner

Why is my child a perfectionist?

Frost Lahart and Rosenblate (1991) examined the role of parents in the development of perfectionistic strivings in their children. Although the sample was fairly small, they found that mothers’ perfectionism was associated with child’s increased perfectionism. However, no association was found between child and father.

On the other hand, Parker (2000) applied FMPS to 578 gifted 6th grade students as well as their parents. The results showed little parental impact on perfectionism to their children. Parker and his colleagues believed that mothers with high goals and standards for themselves tend to have children who do the same whereas fathers with perfectionistic character tend to have children who are more preoccupied with order and structure.

Although little or no association was found between parents’ and children’s perfectionistic character, Ablard and Parker (1997) suggested that parents of gifted children who maintained a performance-goal orientation were significantly more likely to manifest the unhealthy/ dysfunctional perfectionistic type.

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A

++

研究分享•Research Corner

Heyman and Dweck (1992) stated that parents tend to possess 2 types of achievement goals for their children:

Learning-goal orientation

Performance-goal orientation

Refers to parents who primarily encourage their children to:

Refers to parents who emphasise external indicators of academic success:

Understand the learning materials

VS

Good grades

Enjoy learning

Awards

Seek challenges

Ranking

References Ablard, K. E., & Parker, W. D. (1997). Parents’ achievement goals and perfectionism in their academically talented children. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 26, 651–667.

Chan, D. W. (2007). Perfectionism among Chinese gifted students in Hong Kong: Relationships to coping strategies and teacher ratings. Gifted Education International, 23, 157-168.

Frost, R. O., Lahart, C. M., & Rosenblate, R. (1991). The development of perfectionism: A study of daughters and their parents.

Cognitive Therapy and Research, 15, 469490.

Frost, R. O., Marten, P., Lahart, C., & Rosenblate, R. (1990). The dimensions of perfectionism. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 14(5), 449-468.

Hamachek, D. E. (1978). Psychodynamics of normal and neurotic perfectionism.

Psychology, 15, 27–33.

Summary Healthy perfectionism is a positive personality trait as students strives for the best whilst at the same time they allow failure and are happy to learn from it. However, unhealthy perfectionism is a negative personality trait that might produce obsessive compulsive behaviours as students pursue extremely high standards but never feel that their efforts are good enough. Previous research studies showed that parents’ expectation and perfectionistic character might contribute to perfectionism in their gifted children.

Heyman, G. D., & Dweck, C. S. (1992).

Achievement goals and intrinsic motivation:Their relation and their role in adaptive motivation. Motivation and Emotion, 16, 231–247.

Parker, W. D. (2000). Healthy perfectionism in the gifted. Journal of Advanced Academics, 11(4), 173-182.

Parker, W. D., & Mills, C. J. (1996). The incidence of perfectionism in gifted students.

Gifted Child Quarterly, 40, 194–199.

Reflection As a parent, which type of achievement goals do you possess for your gifted child?

Which is more important? Fun or grades?

What can be done to maintain your gifted child as a normal/ healthy perfectionist?

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專家分享•Professional Sharing

培育完美主義者： 協助完美主義兒童的應對策略 完美主義一直被視為輔導資優兒 童與青少年的主要重點之一，然 而，人們對完美主義這概念卻缺 乏共識。相關的文獻回顧指出， 有些研究員把完美主義定義為一 個多維的概念，有些認為完美主 義是人類發展中一個健康且不可 或缺的部分，有些則視完美主義 為具破壞性和負面的。無論持那 一個觀點都好，完美主義的定義 看來大都離不開兩個特點：完美 主義者傾向於抱有難以或無法達 成的期望和標準，而他們所訂立 的高標準也可能會影響其表現。 有些人對於自己的表現寄予厚 望，而且對事情訂立很高的 標準。當然，高標準可以是一 股使人邁向卓越的推動力。 它可以發揮正面的影響，使人 出色地完成工作，得到讚賞， 並變得可靠。可是，這股推動 力一旦「失控」，亦可以帶來 負面的結果。根據Antony及 Swinson(2009)所述，標準有 用與否取決於三個因素： 標準 的可實現性 （目標是否能夠達 到？）； 信念的合理性 （必須 要達到這標準嗎？）；以及 設 立標準的代價和效益 （有需要 時可否調整自己的標準及改變 自己的信念？）。我們會在下 文探討幾個個案以及一些相關 策略。 Katrina學習鋼琴已好幾年。

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她既喜歡比賽也享受練習，練 琴的時間往往比導師建議的更 長，每天會花上好幾小時。她 報名參加了一個鋼琴比賽，並 挑選了一首艱深的樂曲參賽。 演奏會前約一星期，她向導師 匯報說自己從未把樂曲完整地 演奏過一遍。她解釋道：「我 一旦出錯，不管是彈錯一個 鍵、保持一個音太久，還是忘 記改變音量，都會令我感到十 分沮喪，而且必須從頭再開始 彈奏 （信念的合理性） 。」換 言之，Katrina每每在犯了任何 錯誤後就拒絕繼續彈奏樂章 （ 標準的可實現性） ，結果她還 未練習過樂曲的下半部 （設立 標準的代價和效益）。 Katrina的父母透露，他們經常 會因為女兒在練習鋼琴上的完 美的追求而與她一樣的感到沮 喪。我們建議他們幫助Katrina 在練習鋼琴上分辨實際與不切 實際的目標，讓女兒相信若只 得四星期練習時間便奢求自己 能把樂章演奏得完美無瑕並不 合乎實際，但是若期望能改善 演奏技巧，逐漸減少出錯卻是 可行。此外，讓Katrina認識自 己的能力上的限制也很重要。 父母與Katrina進行過好幾次 討論後，她才完全了解自己的 能力上的限制，因而容許自己 做得不夠盡善盡美。「假如我

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

作者﹕程永德

每天花數小時練習這樂章，我 的演奏或許會更趨完美，可是 我亦會錯失參與其他活動的機 會。」這十五歲的女孩經過數 次家庭會議後說。意識到自 己花了過多時間練習一首樂曲 後，她學會了按先後緩急進行 不同活動。 David自今年初起便一直為要 完成作文功課而苦苦掙扎。 他總是一直地盯著作文紙， 直至夜深都無法取得任何進 展。到睡前，他就會為未能 完成功課而變得焦躁不安（ 設立標準的代價和效益）。 直至最近，David的家長約見 了老師，討論這個問題。他 們發現，David在課堂上也同 樣花上很長時間盯著作文紙， 卻沒有動過一筆。老師曾經問 David在做甚麼，他回答：「 我怕我會寫出乏善可陳的東西 （ 標準的可實現性） ，所以直 至我從頭到尾設計好故事情 節，我才會動筆 （信念的合理 性） 。」之後，老師請他說出 想要寫甚麼時，他卻能仔細地 描述故事的角色、背景、事件 與高潮。 我們建議家長與David一起訂 立完成作文的計劃，為每一個 子目標定下時限：用5至10分 鐘起稿、10分鐘寫完一段、5 分鐘修改。家長定期檢查David

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的進度，以確保他能達到所有 子目標。當David在作文方面建 立起獨立後，家長便漸漸減少 檢查次數。我們亦建議家長在 David感到壓力大的時期（即在 死線臨近的危機中），避免與 他討論他慣性拖延與時間管理 的問題。David的家庭成功把建 議付諸實行，而此後David再也 沒有遲交作文功課。 Samuel是一名小三學生，他 熱愛跑步，甚有運動天分。他 的同班同學喜歡在小息時玩捉 人遊戲，還劃定了每位參與 者都不能越過的界線。假如 有人越過界線，就會自動「 出局」，並會成為捉人的那 個。Samuel不但善於玩這個 遊戲，而且以嘲笑「出局」 者為樂，他會走近他們，並向 他們大喊大叫。有些時候，他 會因為走得太近那些「出局」 者而令自己無處可逃。在這種 情況下，他會跳過界線，令自 己自動「出局」，同時會宣稱 「我是故意出局的！」他不想 同學看到他犯錯或發現他任何 弱點 （信念的合理性） 。他害 怕自己會辜負自己的期望 （標 準的可實現性） ，即在整個遊 戲中都保持「在局中」。他選 擇故意淘汰自己去避免失敗 （ 設立標準的代價和效益） 。結 果，因為Samuel要不勝出遊 戲，要不放棄，令同學們對他 很不滿。 老師在家長日把Samuel這個問 題告知他的家長，並建議他們 為九歲的兒子處理有關問題。於 是，他們便告訴Samuel有關一 個同樣不遵守遊戲規則的孩子

的故事，並把那孩子所汲取到教 訓套用到Samuel的生活中。要 令Samuel明白同學在遊戲中的 感受，在家中進行角色扮演遊 戲是另一個策略。因此，家長就 如何對相近情況作出適當反應 與Samuel進行了討論，並模擬 相關情況。他們藉著這個機會讓 Samuel明白別人對他的行為會 出現甚麼反應。結果，Samuel 對同儕建立了同理心。

參考文獻

除了上述策略外，家長也可從教 師的角度去看待完美主義，透過 與完美主義的學生討論相關議題 去發掘協助他們的良方妙法，可 以跟他們討論的議題包括：認識 自己的優缺點及了解沒有人能在 所有事情上傲視同群；體諒不同 人的同異之處；接受犯錯，以減 輕對失敗的恐懼；學習助人與接 受他人幫助；以及培養與接納自 己和別人有關的幽默感(Schuler, 1999)等。家長必須明白，養育 子女並非易事，而養育完美主義 者更是困難重重。如上文所述， 對兒童，尤其是完美主義者來 說，要在家庭和學校取得成功， 訂立切實、靈活和合理的標準極 為重要。無論如何，在協助完美 主義的孩子對學習建立正確的態 度和行為，以及引領他們取得更 大成就方面，家長都扮演著舉足 輕重的角色。

Pacht, A. R. (1984). Reflections on perfectionism.

American Psychologist, 39, 386-390.

Antony, M. M., & Swinson, R. P. (2009). When Perfect isn’t good enough. Strategies for Coping with Perfectionism (2nd Eds.).

Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc. Burns, D. D. (1980, November). The perfectionist’s script for self-defeat. Psychology Today, 7076.

Flett, G. L. & Hewitt, P. L. (2002). Perfectionism: Theory, research and treatment.

Washington, DC: American Psychological Press.

Lazarfeld, S. (1991). The courage for imperfection.

Individual Psychology, 47(10), 93-96.

Maslow, A. (1970). Motivation and personality (Rev. ed.). New York: Harper & Row.

Schuler, P. A. (1999). Voices of perfectionism: Perfectionistic gifted adolescents in a rural middle school. Storrs, CT: The National Research Center on the Gifted and Talented.

Schuler, C. (2002). Perfectionism in Gifted Children and Adolescents. In M. Neihart., S. M. Reis., N. M. Robinson., & S. M. Moon. (Eds.) The Social and Emotional development of gifted children. What do we know? (pp.71-79). Washington, DC: Prufrock Press, Inc. .

Silverman, L. K. (1990). Issues in affective development of the gifted. In J. VanTasselBaska (Ed.), A practical guide to counseling the gifted in a school setting (pp.15-30).

Reston, VA: Council for Exceptional Children.

Webb, T. J., Meckstroth, E. A., & Tolan, S. S. (1982). Guiding the gifted child: A practical source for parents and teachers.

Columbus: Ohio Psychology Press.

程永德 香港資優教育學苑教育心理學家

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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PARENTING PERFECIONIST:

Coping Strategies to help these children Author: Perfectionism has been cited as one of the major counseling focuses for gifted children and adolescents (Silverman, 1990; Webb, Meckstroth & Tolan, 1982), but there is a lack of agreement on the construct of perfectionism. A review of the literature highlights that some researchers define perfectionism as a multidimensional concept (Flett & Hewitt, 2002), others find it as a healthy and salient part of human development (Lazarfeld, 1991; Marslow, 1970); some view it as destructive and negative (Burns, 1980; Pacht, 1984). Regardless of which view is taken, most definitions appear to share two features: Perfectionists tend to have expectations and standards that are difficult or impossible to meet; and their high standards could interfere with performance.

Some people have high expectations and standards on how they should perform and things should be done. Of course, setting a high standard is like a drive toward excellence. It

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could be a positive trait to inspire people to do a good job, receive praise, and be dependable.

However, it could also result in negative consequences when the drive moves “out of bounds”. According to Antony and Swinson (2009), whether the standard is helpful depends on three factors: the excessiveness of the standard (can this goal be met?); the accuracy of the belief (is it true that the standard must be met?); and the costs and benefits of imposing the standard (can one possibly adjust his standard and change his beliefs when necessary?). Several case studies and strategies are discussed in the following.

Katrina had been playing piano for several years. The teenager enjoyed both competing and practicing. Katrina usually practiced longer than her instructor suggested, say a couple of hours every day.

Katrina was enrolled in a piano competition and chosen a difficult piece to play. About a week before the concert, she

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

Victor Ching

reported to her instructor that she had not played the piece all the way through yet. Katrina explained, “If I make an error, whether playing a wrong key, holding a note too long or forgetting to change volumes, I will get very frustrated and have to start again from the beginning (accuracy of the belief).” In other words, Katrina refused to continue the piece after making any mistake (excessiveness of the standard), and she had yet to practice the second half of the song as a result (costs and benefits of imposing the standard).

Katrina’s parents revealed that they often became as frustrated as Katrina about her need for perfection on piano practice. We suggested the parents to help Katrina distinguish between realistic and unrealistic goals in piano practicing. They were assigned to convince the girl that it is not realistic to expect that she would not make any mistakes when she had only practiced the piece for 4 weeks’

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time, but it is realistic to expect an improvement on her skill by making less and less errors.

Moreover, it is important to have Katrina recognising her own limitations. Parents engaged Katrina in several discussions before she fully understood her limitations, and consequently, gave herself permission to be less than perfect. “If I spent several hours practicing the piece every day, I might be able to play it more ‘perfect’, but I would miss out other activities as a cost,” said the 15 year old girl after several family discussions. By realizing that she unnecessarily spent hours on practicing one single piece of music, she learned to prioritise her time on different activities.

David had been struggled to complete his essay homework since early this year. He would spend hours and hours staring at the paper but made no progress until late at night. By bedtime, he would become very anxious about not completing his homework (costs and benefits

of imposing the standard). Until recently, his parents made an appointment to meet his teacher and discuss the issue. They found that David was observed sitting for lengths of time staring at the essay paper without doing any work at class too. His teacher once asked David about hsi work, he replied, “I am afraid I would write something not good enough (excessiveness of the standard), so I am not going to start writing until I create a good story plot, from start to finish (accuracy of the belief).”

His teacher then asked David to tell the ideas about the essay, David answered with detailed descriptions on the characters, setting, events, and climax.

We suggested parents to work with David to on developing a plan to complete essays, with fixed amount of time on each sub-goal: 5-10 minutes for rough drafts, 10 minutes for each paragraph and 5 minutes for revising. Parents checked regularly with David to ensure that he achieved all these

sub-goals, and became less frequent as David developed independence in writing essays.

We also suggested the parents to avoid talking with David about his procrastination and time management issues when he was having a stressful time, i.e. in the middle of a deadline crisis. The family responded well to the suggestions and David never submitted his essays late ever since.

Samuel was a P3 student, somewhat athletic and loved running. His class love playing the Tag game during recess, setting up boundaries that every participant had to stay within. If someone stepped outside the boundaries, he or she would automatically be “out”, and would go tagging others. Not only was Samuel good at playing the game, he also loved to taunt whoever was “out”. He would run near them and yell at them. Sometimes the boy ran too close to those were “out” and left himself no room to escape. He would jump

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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專家分享•Professional Sharing

out of bounds, automatically making him “out”, and declared, “I wanted to be out!” Samuel did not want his peers to see his flaws or detect any imperfections (accuracy of the belief). He was afraid he could not meet his own expectations (excessiveness of the standard), i.e. “In” throughout the game.

He chose to eliminate himself intentionally to prevent failure (costs and benefits of imposing the standard). Consequently, Samuel’s peers got frustrated with him because he always must win or gave up.

Samuel’s teacher shared the issue with his parents on Parent’s Day. His parents were suggested to address the problem with the 9 year old boy. They told Samuel stories of a similar child who does not play by the rules, and apply the lessons learned to Samuel’s own life. Roleplay game at home is another strategy to help him understand how his peers would feel during the game. The family discussed and demonstrated appropriate reactions to similar situation. This opportunity allowed Samuel to see how certain behaviours are perceived by others. As a result, Samuel has developed empathy towards his peers.

perspective and explore ways to help these students by discussing related topics, such as recognise own strengths and weaknesses; understand that no one is superior in everything; appreciate similarities and differences among people; accept mistakes to reduce fear of failure; learn to help others and to receive help from others; and develop a sense of humour in regard to accepting themselves and others (Schuler, 1999).

Parents should understand that parenting is hard work, while parenting a perfectionist has its own unique challenges.

As discussed above, setting an achievable, adjustable and reasonable standard could be vital for children, especially perfectionists, to succeed at home and school. Nevertheless, parents do play an important role to help these perfectionists develop healthy attitudes and behaviours towards learning, and lead them to greater success.

Besides the strategies mentioned above, parents can also view perfectionism from the teachers’

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

REFERENCES Antony, M. M., & Swinson, R. P. (2009). When Perfect isn’t good enough. Strategies for Coping with Perfectionism (2nd Eds.).

Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc. Burns, D. D. (1980, November). The perfectionist’s script for self-defeat. Psychology Today, 7076.

Flett, G. L. & Hewitt, P. L. (2002). Perfectionism: Theory, research and treatment.

Washington, DC: American Psychological Press.

Lazarfeld, S. (1991). The courage for imperfection.

Individual Psychology, 47(10), 93-96.

Maslow, A. (1970). Motivation and personality (Rev. ed.). New York: Harper & Row. Pacht, A. R. (1984). Reflections on perfectionism.

American Psychologist, 39, 386-390.

Schuler, P. A. (1999). Voices of perfectionism: Perfectionistic gifted adolescents in a rural middle school. Storrs, CT: The National Research Center on the Gifted and Talented.

Schuler, C. (2002). Perfectionism in Gifted Children and Adolescents. In M. Neihart., S. M. Reis., N. M. Robinson., & S. M. Moon. (Eds.) The Social and Emotional development of gifted children. What do we know? (pp.71-79). Washington, DC: Prufrock Press, Inc. .

Silverman, L. K. (1990). Issues in affective development of the gifted. In J. VanTasselBaska (Ed.), A practical guide to counseling the gifted in a school setting (pp.15-30).

Reston, VA: Council for Exceptional Children.

Webb, T. J., Meckstroth, E. A., & Tolan, S. S. (1982). Guiding the gifted child: A practical source for parents and teachers.

Columbus: Ohio Psychology Press.

Victor Ching

Educational Psychologist The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education

「童」一天空•My Corner

力求完美

完美主義通常跟資優人士唇齒相依，因此，每當 說起資優生，人們很自然就會想起這個名詞。在 這個科技一日千里而且紀律更嚴明的時代，完美 主義這概念不能遭到忽略。 作者﹕熊文浩

雖然我從未接受過智力評估，但是作為香港資優教育學苑 的人文學科學員，都可能在學術領域上有些過人的天賦。不 過，我卻不認為自己在學術上是一個完美主義者。我與學苑 的其他同學不一樣，他們在學校裡總是埋頭苦讀，但是我卻 不過是一個普通的孩子，只會在上課時盡量留心點就算。正 因為我對學科的熱衷程度，我才不會是完美主義者。當然， 我非常喜愛在學校裡學習，因為我明白到這是一個難能可貴 的機會，而這個機會是世界上千千萬萬人所未能擁有的。然 而，我是否一定要每科都拿甲等（或在文憑試拿5**），成為 學校裡最頂尖的學生呢？假如不用費吹灰之力就可以取得這 種成果的話，那麼我樂意之至。但問題是，（我估計）我要 比別人更用心才能獲得這種榮耀，而我實在很不願意為了得 到這種光環而把所有時間都花在讀書上。 假如我的意見令你感到不爽，我實在感到遺憾，不過這些都 是我的肺腑之言。 很多人說，讀書是一種能令人在長大後達成夢想的方法。我 十分同意這種說法，因為人應該實現夢想，並為此付出最大 的努力。在公開試取得優異的成績獲會令你能讀到心儀的課 程。不過，並非所有課程都要求全科滿分，所以你可以在學 科中尋找平衡，甚至騰出時間做生活中其他重要的事。 事實上，學業成績並非唯一重要的事。最近，我看了一篇有關 公司如何聘請員工的文章。該文章描述了一個個案，一個成績 幾近完美的碩士學生應徵一份工作，但那份工作跟她修讀的學 科風馬牛不相及，因而引起了面試官的好奇。面試官問她為甚 麼應徵，她說自己一直以來都只顧著讀書而從未理會過自己的 Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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「童」一天空•My Corner

興趣或想到自己的生涯，而她的父母亦只期望她 在博士畢業後當個大學教授或從事政府工作，直 至申請那份工作前不久，她才發現自己一直在做 自己不喜歡做的事情，因此她決定要應徵。 上述個案正好顯示出學業上的完美主義可能如何 誤導人。你可以追求學業方面的卓越，但不要過 分追求。文章的作者之後也指出，包括非學術活 動的有趣履歷可顯示應徵者不只懂得讀書，而且 擁有與其他人協作的能力，讓雇主肯定自己雇用 了對的人，因此比起完美的學歷更能吸引雇主， 也解釋了為甚麼我有點抗拒對學業過份執著。 就學業方面的過份完美主義發表過個人意見後， 我想分享一下我個人的完美主義。我喜愛藝術。 戲劇、電影、音樂甚至舞蹈（假如我想令自己尷 尬的話）都在我的興趣範疇內，所以我經常參加 這些活動。在學校裡，我參演話劇，亦在學校樂 團裡吹奏小號，我因此分別成為了劇團和音樂學 會的幹事。在學苑裡，電影課程和其他有趣刺激 的課程為我帶來了無窮樂趣。報讀了不少與電影 有關的課程後，我學會了寫電影劇本，以及解讀 不同電影背後的訊息。在我這些興趣領域裡，我 總是會力求完美。 我喜歡音樂，所以我跟幾個同樣熱愛音樂的朋 友一起玩無伴奏合唱。可能你們都知道，合音 要求每個音都準確無誤，這樣聽起來才和諧悅 耳。顧名思義，無伴奏合唱就是在無樂器伴奏 下演唱，以人聲作背景和弦，因此歌手每個音 的音準都極為重要。歌手唱的每個音都會影響 到整個和聲，而和聲是音樂的主要元素之一。 由於要求音準完美無瑕，所以我必須把每個音 調校到絲毫不差，確保每次演唱都沒有出錯。

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

多得無伴奏合唱喚醒了我內心的完美主義，我 才可以唱出完美的合音。 在演戲興趣的驅使下，我申請了一個青年劇場 獎，並幸運地成功獲獎，因而有機會跟其他有同 樣抱負的人一起在2013與2014年間接受一次難能 可貴的訓練。此外，該獎項亦讓我有機會在去年 十二月參與一個話劇的製作。雖然我只是擔當配 角，但我跟其他人一樣盡心盡力。這還不夠完美 主義嗎？老實說，每個有熱誠的演員在台上都是 完美主義者，沒有一個演員不是施盡渾身解數， 力求把角色演繹得淋漓盡致的。且容我自鳴得意 地說，很多人讚賞我的演出滑稽惹笑，這是喜劇 演員期望得到的回應。然而，雖然得到讚賞，但 我依然感到不太滿意，因為「引人發笑」這回應 聽起來只是像讚賞我自嘲的能力，卻並不像是在 誇獎我的演技。因此，我期望有機會演出較嚴肅 的角色，可以讓我展示我的演技，令觀眾知道我 不但只懂說笑話，而且還是一個成熟的演員。參 加過那個話劇製作後，我更醉心於戲劇。由於我 對演戲的興趣變得更濃厚，所以我更不許自己的 演出有瑕疵。縱然我在學業上不是一個完美主義 者，但是在戲劇世界裡我卻不可不抱完美主義。 很多人說藝術是給完美主義者的。假如你不追求完 美，則不論在音樂、舞蹈還是設計方面都難有佳作。 完美主義對社會絕對有利。人類所興建過的名勝 古蹟，以及所發展出的科技，通通都是完美主義 者不遺餘力的成果。然而，我們要謹記的是，過 份或缺乏完美主義都可能帶來不利。那麼，你們 追求夢想的同時也要好好休息。

「童」一天空•My Corner

Being Perfect Perfectionism is a common characteristic among gifted people, so people often associate the word with gifted students. In this generation where technologies are developing at a phenomenal rate and disciplines are stricter than ever, the concept of perfectionism can hardly be ignored.

Author:

Andy Hung

As a humanities student of the HKAGE, I am probably gifted in some academic areas though I have never taken any intelligence test. Nevertheless, I do not consider myself an academic perfectionist. Unlike my HKAGE fellow students who study their guts out at school, I am just an ordinary kid who only tries to pay attention during lessons.

Not having keen interest in school subjects, I believe I am not an academic perfectionist.

No doubt I do like learning at school as I realise that it is a rare opportunity that millions and billions of people around the world are not given, but must I get straight As (or 5** in the DSE) and be the best student at school? Well, I do not really mind if that is effortless. However, (I guess) I will have to work much harder than others to make such an achievement and I do mind spending all my time studying to attain such glory. I know

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「童」一天空•My Corner

that you may not agree with my views, but they all come from the bottom of my heart.”

is why I am a little bit opposed to academic perfectionism.

Many people say that studying is a way for you to achieve your dreams when you get older. I certainly agree with that saying as people should do their utmost to realise their dreams. Getting outstanding results in public examinations may pave your way to your ideal course; however, not every course requires you to get perfect scores on every test, so you can strike a balance between subjects, and even spare some time on other important things in life.

Having shared my opinions on academic perfectionism, I would like to talk about my own perfectionism. I like arts. Drama, films, music, and even dance (if I would like to embarrass myself) are my fields of interest.

I often engage myself in these activities.

At school, I play in dramas and also play trumpet in the school orchestra, making me become a committee member of the Drama Club and the Music Society respectively. In the HKAGE, movie courses, as well as other exciting courses, made my day. Enrolled in quite a number of film-related courses, I learnt to write film scripts and understand messages behind different films. In these fields, I always try my best to be perfect.

Actually, not only do your grades matter. I have recently read an article of how companies hire employees. The article highlights a case where an almost perfect master graduate was interviewed for a job that was totally unrelated to her studies, thereby intriguing the interviewers. They asked the reason why she applied for the job. She stated that she always thought only about studies but never about her own hobbies or a future career.

Her parents just wanted her to work either as a professor or for the government after she graduated with a doctorate. Not long before she applied for the job, she realised that she had spent all the time doing something that she did not like and that was why she decided to submit a job application.

The above case is an example of how academic perfectionism may lead you the wrong way.

You may pursue academic excellence but do not go over the top. The writer of the article points out that an interesting profile with non-academic activities can show not only an applicant’s academic ability but also his capability to work with other people, thus looking more appealing to the employer than a perfect academic background. That

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

I like music, and I sing acappella with my enthusiastic friends. You may know that, in a chord, every note has to be precise to produce a harmonic sound. Acappella is basically singing without any instruments. To do so, human voices serve as the accompaniment, and preciseness of every note the singer sings is critically important because it affects the whole harmony, one of the key elements of music. As flawless notes are required, I have to sing my notes precisely and make sure I am correct every time I sing. Acappella has awoken the perfectionist inside of me to make me sing perfectly.

Driven by my interest in acting, I applied for a youth theatre award, and thankfully, I was awarded with precious training sessions with other hopefuls across 2013 and 2014.

As a part of the program of the award, I was involved in a theatre production last December. I only played a supporting role, but I put in my effort just like everyone else.

「童」一天空•My Corner

That does not sound perfectionistic enough?

To be honest, every passionate actor is a perfectionist on stage. There is no actor who does not put in the best performance he can, portraying his character as perfectly as possible. Shamelessly, I have to say that many complimented my acting as hilarious, a positive feedback that every comedy actor expects to get. Nevertheless, I found the compliment not quite satisfying because being amusing does not sound like a praise for my acting ability but rather for my ability to make fun of myself. I just hope to play a more serious character to show my acting skills rather than joking around so as to make the audience know that I am also a mature actor. After taking part in this production, I have dedicated myself more to the theatre.

I have stronger interest in acting and I will not give any performance with intolerable flaws. Although I may not be an academic perfectionist, I have to be a perfectionist in the world of the theatre.

Many people say that the arts are for perfectionists. If you do not strive for perfection, then it will be difficult for you to deliver great performance or produce good artwork, no matter in terms of music, dance or design.

Perfectionism is definitely positive to the society. All the monuments built and the technologies developed are accomplishments of perfectionists who worked like there was no tomorrow. Just remember, neither too much nor too little perfectionism is helpful, so strive for your dreams and rest well.

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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「童」一天空•My Corner

完美主義 每天我看報紙，都會看到一些關於整容手術的資訊，從聲稱有關 手術百分之九十九點九安全的廣告，以至有關整形失敗的新聞， 以及展示失敗個案的照片都有。或許很多人會忽視這些宣傳與科 學真相，但是你有否意識到它們其實是自相矛盾呢？

今時今日，科技發展迅速，一 個人要完全改頭換面並非天方夜 譚。很多人寧願放棄自己獨一無 二的樣貌，以明星的典型面部特 徵為模本接受整形。眾所周知， 電影明星為了令自己變得更好看 而接受整容手術，以增強個人自 信，並使自己更能吸引觀眾，這 情況非常普遍。這些明星的支持 者或視他們為榜樣的人甘願隨波 逐流，改變自己原來的樣貌。結 果，我們看到很多外表好看的人 樣貌都如「倒模」般相似，例如 他們都擁有一雙圓大的眼睛¬、 又高又直的鼻子、性感的厚唇小 嘴，以及瓜子臉。然而，我們要 問問自己內心，究竟我們是否真 的需要追求完美，例如令自己變 得更美？

作者﹕李穎佳

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對完美主義者來說，追求完美主 義絕對是一種動力。他們渴望完 美，不願遭別人批評。他們嘗試 按臉部的黃金比例改變自己的臉 部輪廓，令自己擁有多數人認同 的美貌。變得完美是他們的目 標、渴求及夢想。世界各地都有

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

很多人嘗試接受整形。 不過，他們值得冒這樣的險去換 取一張¬「假」臉嗎？有些地方 不但到處都可以看到整形廣告， 而且人的樣貌亦非常相似。「一 號眼」、「二號鼻」、「三號 嘴」等名詞亦相繼出現，並流傳 至世界各地。這些荼毒人的概念 不但會影響下一代，而且將變得 越來越普遍。 老實說，完美主義是對自己極為 不利的行為。完美主義者都渴望 達成不切實際的目標。他們強迫 自己取得成功外，更因為畏懼失 敗而要求自己做到最好。由於他 們認為自己做的一定沒錯，並必 須得到所有人認同，因此害怕遭 別人否定。他們往往過份看重自 己的弱點與瑕疵。有些人認為， 因為完美主義者在嘗試新事物 時總是步步為營，所以完美主義 會破壞童心和創意，令人故步自 封。當完美主義者發覺到自己不 夠完美時，可能很容易會出現抑 鬱和焦慮的情緒，並因此導致自

「童」一天空•My Corner

尊心低落和情緒不穩。 完美主義是好還是壞呢？它讓 人不斷進步，邁向卓越。它是 一種動力，令人努力不懈和避 免出錯。可是，完美主義同時 也可能會令人增添壓力。富勒 （Thomas Fuller）說過「再好的 花園也會有雜草」。這句話適用 於每個人身上。沒有人是十全十 美的，我們天生都是能力有限。 由於沒有事情能盡善盡美，所以 我們並不可能解決所有日常要面 對的問題。 總有些困惑是我們無法解除的； 總有些錯誤是我們無法改正的。 我們與「完美」之間總存在著某 些距離，這種距離只能縮短而不 會消失。我們唯一能做的是循著 正軌前進，步向「完美」的方 向。我們活在這世上並不是為了 把所有事情變成「完美」，而是 要令這世界變得更美好，使每個 人生活愜意，這就是人生的主要 目標。「做到最好」當然是一種 正確的態度，可是，假如我們過 了火，例如好高騖遠或過分追求 完美等，則對我們沒有好處。當 我們對自己吹毛求疵，最終會得 不償失。不過，完美主義其實沒 好沒壞。 完美主義的定義因人而異。正如 美的標準人人不同一樣，我們各 自都有一套獨一無二的標準去衡 量甚麼是「完美」。要說明一件 事情是否完美，談何容易。Kelly Millar曾經說過：「完美是不能 定義，也是肉眼看不見的，只能 在心裡發現。」因為每人看事物 （如藝術品）的角度都不一樣， 所以完美是很主觀的概念。例

如，每個評核員的標準都不盡相 同，因此他們會給同一件美術作 品打不同的分數。此外，由於世 界上沒有完美，而且永遠都有進 步空間，所以在一般情況下，一 件美術作品並不會得到滿分。即 使一個人擁有高超的技術，並在 其藝術作品中發揮得淋漓盡致， 其作品都未必會完美無瑕。約納 斯‧沙克（Jonas Salk）曾經說 過：「藝術家唯一要關注的是要 達到他自己而非他人眼中的某種 完美。」每個人對完美的看法都 不一樣，因此我們不應太在意別 人的評價。 今時今日的社會，生活水平越來 越高，加上人們渴望享受成功所 帶來的快樂，因此越來越多人追 求完美主義。造成這個情況的其 中一個原因是很多家長給孩子過 多壓力，使他們不勝負荷。家長 經常對孩子有不切實際的期望， 為他們造成很沉重的精神壓力。 例如，家長要求孩子在考試取得 最高分數，或是因孩子未能圓滿 地完成某項任務而責罰他們。然 而，孩子取得高分是否就等於他 們已學有所成？我相信大部分人 都是天生會犯錯的，因此人未能 做到盡善盡美，實在不足為奇。 要減輕孩子的負擔，家長就不應 把他們逼得太緊。反之，家長應 給孩子更多時間和空間，讓他們 從失敗中學習，並重新站起來， 繼而使他們能繼續向自己的目標 邁進，以及快樂地生活。

措。他們帶我看不同的名醫尋求 建議，可是他們卻只得到一個的 答案——靜心等待那小洞自然消 失。那時，他們無法做任何事去 改變現實，因此都感都十分徬徨 無助。他們只好以積極正面的態 度去面對此事，也從來沒有對我 失去希望。時間一天天過去，經 過十二年的憂慮，我終於痊癒。 這十二年來，我的父母親常常提 醒我不要做劇烈運動，並叮囑我 要時常保持樂觀。當我感到難過 時，他們總會給我鼓勵，而我亦 能完全感受到他們每天的擔憂。 可幸的是，我最終能夠不藥而 癒。這段個人經歷使我明白到， 我們不必為自己的瑕疵而怨天尤 人。當我們得到別人的關愛和支 持，就能克服生命中的障礙，沒 有甚麼需要害怕的。 卡爾‧舒茨（Carl Schurz）曾言 道：「理想就如天上星辰，是你 無法用手觸碰的。然而，你可以 像茫茫大海中的水手般，讓這些 星辰給你引路，只要跟著它們， 你就可以到達目的地。」遺憾 的是，完美總跟我們保持著一定 距離。力求完美可能是活得精彩 的一種方法。可是，假如我們過 分追求完美，卻可能會對我們造 成不利影響，使我們受到心靈上 的傷害。因此，就讓我們活出真 我，在任何事上都全力以赴，令 這世界變得更美善。

我小時候曾有這樣的一段經歷。 我有一個與生俱來的缺陷—心臟 有個小洞，對我的健康構成一定 威脅。當我的父母親從醫生口中 知道這個消息時，他們都驚惶失 Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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「童」一天空•My Corner

Perfectionism “There is always some information related to plastic surgery in the newspaper every day, from advertisements claiming the surgeries are 99.9% safe to daily news with headlines like “plastic surgery failure” and photos with horrible unsuccessful cases.”Perhaps many people may simply ignore these promotions and scientific facts, but are you aware of the fact that they are actually contradicting themselves?

Nowadays, under the rapid development of technology, it is possible to completely change one’s look. Many people would like to give up their own unique facial appearance and copy some typical features from famous stars. As we all know, it is really common for movie stars to make themselves prettier through undergoing cosmetic surgeries to boost their confidence and be more attractive to the public. People who support these stars or who consider these stars as their role models are willing to follow the trend and change their original faces, too. As a result, we can see that people with a good appearance all have similar facial features, such as a pair of big round eyes, a long straight nose, a small mouth with thick sexy lips and a V-shaped face. However, let us ask ourselves deep from our heart: Is it really necessary for us to pursue perfection, e.g. making ourselves prettier?

Author:

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Rachel Li

Achieving perfectionism is definitely one of motivations. They want to be perfect. They do not want to be criticized by others.

They try to adjust their appearance to the golden ratio, the ideal distribution of facial features in which the majority of people consider as beauty. Being perfect is their aim, their wish and their dream. A lot of people attempt cosmetic surgeries around the world. Is it necessary for them to take such risk to exchange for a ‘faked’ face? There are plastic surgery advertisements everywhere in some places where people look

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

「童」一天空•My Corner

nearly the same. Terms like “A eyes”, “B nose”, “C mouth”, appear and have spread throughout the world. These harmful concepts will affect the next generation and become more universal in the future.

To be honest, perfectionism is the ultimate self-defeating behavior. Perfectionists aim at reaching excessively high unrealistic goals. They force themselves not only to achieve success, but also to strive for the best as they fear failure.

They are afraid of being disapproved by others as they think that what they are doing must be right and must be agreed by everybody. They always overemphasize one’s weaknesses and imperfections. Some suggest that perfectionism reduces playfulness, creativity, as well as innovation because people do not want to make mistakes when attempting new things. They may easily face depression and anxiety whenever they recognize they are not perfect enough.

Therefore, they have low self-esteem with unstable emotions.

Is perfectionism good or bad? It helps people keep improving and strive towards the best.

It acts as a motivation for them to work hard and avoid mistakes. Nevertheless, at the same time, it may just add pressure or stress to them.

Thomas Fuller once said “A good garden may have some weeds.” It symbolizes every human being on earth. No one is perfect. We are born with limited abilities and skills. It is impossible to solve every single problem we face every day, as nothing is perfect.

There are always endless puzzles and confusion, which we may not be able to solve or clear up;

there are always dissatisfying mistakes, which we cannot correct; there is always some distance between ‘perfect’ and us, which can only be shortened but not eliminated. What we can do is just to follow the right track and step towards the direction of ‘perfect’. We are living in this world not because we need to turn everything into a state of ‘perfectness’, but it’s just because we can make the world a better place for everyone and people will be delighted with the world; this is the main goal in life. Behaving in a way like ‘striving for the best’ is certainly the right attitude.

However, if we go too far, such as being too ambitious or eager to be perfect, it is not going to help. Eventually it will harm us if we push ourselves too hard. Nevertheless, perfectionism is in fact something neutral.

Perfectionism varies among people. We have unique scales to measure what ‘perfect’ is, just like how we perceive beauty. It is really hard to tell whether it is perfect or not. Kelly Millar once said, ‘Perfection cannot be defined or seen; it can only be found in your heart.’ Perfection is a subjective matter as different people may hold diverse views towards the same issue, such as a piece of artwork. For example, hen one hands in an artwork, one’s marks may differ according to the markers’ preferences. One can never get 100 mark in usual circumstances because nothing is perfect and there is always room for improvement. Even if one possesses a lot of techniques and shows them all in the artwork, it does not mean that it is perfect. Jonas Salk once said, ‘An artist’s only concern is to shoot for some kind of perfection, and on his own terms, not anyone else’s.’ We should not care too much about criticism because everybody may have

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「童」一天空•My Corner

distinctive perceptions towards perfection.

In today’s society, more and more people are pursuing perfectionism since the living standards are higher and they want to enjoy the happiness brought by success. A reason behind this situation is that a lot of parents put too much pressure on children. Parents often have unrealistic expectations on the young ones, causing them great mental stress. For instance, parents may ask their children to get the highest grade in exams or they will be punished for doing things imperfectly. Yet, does obtaining good grades mean that they have learnt everything already?

Does performing imperfectly mean that the world is going to end? I guess most people are born to have mistakes in life, so it’s not surprising to be imperfect at all. In order to reduce children’s burden, parents should not push them too hard.

Instead, parents should give them more space and time to learn from failure and stand up again.

Hence, they can continue to strive for their goals and live cheerfully.

I personally had this kind of experience when I was younger. I was born with a defect. There was a tiny hole in my heart, which posed quite a threat to my health. My parents really panicked when they heard this news from the doctor and they did not know what exactly they could do. They brought me to different famous doctors to seek for advice, but the only answer they got was just to wait for the hole to disappear naturally. At that time, they felt very helpless since they could do nothing to change the fact. They could only hold a positive attitude towards this and they never lost hope in me. As time passed, after 12 years of worries, I finally got well. During these 12 years, my parents

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reminded me not to do vigorous sports and told me to be optimistic all the time. They encouraged me when I was upset and I could totally feel their anxiety every day. Luckily, I was cured without any medical treatment. From my personal story, I learnt that there is nothing to blame if we are imperfect. We need people’s care and support to overcome the obstacles in life, and then there will be nothing to fear.

Carl Schurz once said, ‘Ideals are like stars; you will not succeed in touching them with your hands. But like the seafaring man on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and following them you will reach your destiny.’

Unfortunately, perfection tends to keep a certain distance from us. Aiming to be perfect is probably a wonderful way to live; yet if we over pursue it, there may be adverse effects, which may hurt us psychologically. Thus, let’s live out loud and try our very best in everything, so as to make the world a better place.

家長園地•Parent Zone

完美的追求： 從五歲到十三歲 作者：唐思灝、朱玉蘭

完美主義是一些資優者的特點。完美主義分為兩種﹕健康及不健康的完美主 義。健康的完美主義者往往竭盡所能並享受挑戰; 不健康的完美主義則會訂 立不切實的目標，常常感到自卑，對他人的批評非常敏感。 以下是一對母子的真情對話，希望能令大家對如 何幫助孩子建立健康的完美主義有所啟發﹗

思灝： 我在學業上做得好，不用媽媽勞氣和擔心！

媽媽： 媽媽做什麼事，是你最不喜歡的？

思灝： 有時會發脾氣！

思灝： 第一是每當你大聲責罵我的時候，第二是 當我十分疲累時還不斷叫我繼續做練習的 時候。

媽媽： 媽媽吩咐你做的事情上，十次有多少次你 是甘心情願的呢？

媽媽： 你心目中最完美的媽媽是怎樣的？ 思灝： 不隨便責罵人和容易原諒人。 媽媽： 你喜歡媽媽每天和你做什麼事？ 思灝： 一家人一起吃飯和談談學校日常發生的事。 媽媽： 媽媽和爸爸愛你值多少分？ 思灝： 你們都是100分。 媽媽： 你認為最理想的媽咪是不是我？ 思灝： 是的，只希望有時不要駡我駡得太兇。 媽媽： 我常常責罵你嗎？ 思灝： 不是，但一旦駡起來便十分厲害！ 媽媽： 有什麼時候你喜歡獨自一人，不喜歡媽媽 在身邊？ 思灝： 和同學一起玩耍的時候。 媽媽： 你想像你長大後會如何對待媽媽？ 思灝： 孝 順 你 和 常 常 探 望 你 ， 陪 你 飲 茶 。 ( 他 常常看見我陪我媽媽飲茶，入晒腦，嘻 嘻！) 媽媽： 作為一個兒子，你覺得你做得最好是什麼？

媽媽： 你覺得你有什麼做得不足？

思灝： 有七，八次左右。 媽媽： 在這世界上你覺得什麼最重要？ 思灝： 家人，朋友。 媽媽： 在這世上,你追求什麼？ 思灝： 知識和學業成績。 媽媽： 一對母子之間最重要的是什麼？ 思灝： 要相親相愛。 媽媽： 有什麼是最珍貴的？ 思灝： 孝順。 媽媽： 你最欣賞媽媽什麼地方？ 思灝： 聰明、好人、不會常常責備我。 媽媽： 還有呢？ 思灝： 我覺得你對我學習上的指引十分有道理及 懂得如何教導我。 媽媽： 在十三年中，媽媽與你發生了什麼事令你 最難忘？ 思灝： 你是否記得有一次在我五歲去台灣旅行的時 候，我們一起去浸温泉，我一換好泳裝，便 一個箭步跳進温泉裏，我一下子沉到水底，

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家長園地•Parent Zone

你馬上跳下温泉把我救起，我喝了很多温泉 水，那時我根本未學習過游泳……想起也覺 得十分可笑。還有是一家人到三門仔海灘捉 蟹和一家去吃薄餅，都是開心、難忘的事。 媽媽： 你一生中做了什麼事令自己感到最自豪？ 思灝： 第一，是在過去一年的暑假到馬來西亞參 加跆拳道比賽而取得銅牌。第二，是在英 文的學習上進步了很多。第三，是能夠於 拔萃男書院就讀。 媽媽： 為何你不提及你在數學方面的努力呢？你 也拿了很多了不起的獎？ 思灝： 因為這是從小到大都有的天賦，所以我覺 得理所當然，不够珍惜！ 媽媽： 閉上眼睛，回憶中有什麼開心的時刻？ 思灝： 在跆拳道比賽中獲獎是最開心，雖然在比 賽中有時十分害怕。 媽媽： 有沒有什麼事令你最傷心？ 思灝： 沒有。 媽媽： 你認為你最令媽媽擔心是什麼？ 思灝： 在英文的學習上。我認為自己有很大進步 的空間。 媽媽： 你認為當你長大，媽媽最不放心你的是什麼？ 思灝： 不知道。 媽媽： 若你是女孩子，你認為媽媽對待你的態度 有沒有分別？ 思灝： 差不多，沒有什麼分別。 媽媽： 若最了解你的人有100分，那麼我有多少分？ 思灝： 90分。 媽媽： 你認為將來有什麼成就會令媽媽最自豪？ 思灝： 有一份十分出色的工作和能加入港隊。

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媽媽： 你情願專心讀書還是兼顧跆拳道？ 思灝： 雖然是付出很多，但仍想兩面兼顧。 媽媽： 對於將來入大學的選科，有沒有傾向或意見？ 思灝： 文科和理科也喜歡。 媽媽： 有沒有想過做生意？ 思灝： 沒有，怕把錢賠光！ 媽媽： 你在小學一年級時做了IQtest,知道自己是 資優，對你有什麼影響？ 思灝： 首先覺得開心，跟著便感到不應浪費上天 給自己的恩賜。認為要勤力讀書，不能像 以前一天到晚只管玩耍！ 媽媽： 跟著你在二年級時轉校，你有什麼轉變？ 思灝： 知道自己是資優後，常常感到有想努力讀書 的動力，亦剛巧那時很想接觸電腦，你便為 我報讀了很多網上做練習的課程，中，英， 數，常，什麼都有。從那時起，我做得越來 越起勁，每天最少花一小時完成所有練習， 放學回家第一件事就是開始做！ 媽媽： 哈 哈 ， 你 是 否 記 得 我 們 因 為 怕 全 港 排 名下跌，所以即使到外地旅行也帶備 password到各地的酒店或網吧去完成練 習，沒有一天遺漏？。 思灝： 是啊！很好笑，那時因為平時沒有玩任何 電玩的機會，所以，只要一有機會接觸 電腦，我便十分着迷，那怕只是上網做練 習，也十分起勁。想起覺得自己有點傻！ 媽媽： 那麼，回想這件事對你有什麼影響？ 思灝： 令我喜歡學習，更為自己養成一個很好的 習慣，以後亦不討厭做功課和練習。結果 是成績越來越好，由全級15一步一步的 進步，最後是全級第二。

家長園地•Parent Zone

媽媽： 到四年級時，因想有再進一步的提昇，我 們選擇了由中文小學轉至一間英文小學， 但因英文程度的差異，我提出了若想保持 自己學習上的優勢，有兩個方案。 思灝： 是啊！一是你可能要重讀小四，一是在新 校直接上小五！ 媽媽： 你當時有什麼看法？ 思灝： 起初我聽到也感愕然，因我成績不錯，全 級考第二都要留班？但當你和我仔細方析 我也傾向重讀，那時插班面試的時候，校 長也兩次問及我是否真的選擇重讀小四？ 思灝： 最後，我選擇了重讀！ 媽媽： 那麼，有沒有不樂意？ 思灝： 沒有，我認為沒有問題，可以接受。因為 那時兩校的英文程度差異比較大，現在 回想也認為那時大家商量後的決定是正確 的。因為，我利用重讀的那一年把英文基 礎好好的穩固下來，對日後很有幫助，亦 大大加强了自信心！也因如此，我最後能 考上我最心儀的中學！ 媽媽： 踏入中學，你有什麼感覺？ 思灝： 我感到十分開心，因為這所中學十分適合 自己。我感到自己像一條魚兒能在一個大 海中生活，既有自由自在的感覺亦感到這 裏給予我盡情發揮的機會和空間！ 媽媽： 你認為中學生活會為你帶來什麼？ 思灝： 學習到各方面的知識，而英文方面會有比 較大的進步。 媽媽： 你的同學是怎樣的？對你有什麼影響？ 思灝： 他們都很厲害，成績很好，各人有各人的 專長和特質。令我學會尊重別人和提醒自

己要加倍努力，不想落後。 媽媽： 你有什麼短期目標？ 思灝： 要看多點書，更努力讀書，希望成績更 好，可考入理想的大學！ 媽媽： 最近你報讀了科技大學的中學/大學雙修 課程，你有什麼感覺？ 思灝： 課程挺深，要加油才行！ 媽媽： 報讀比較深的課程，有什麼感覺？ 思灝： 我喜歡有挑戰性，但我也必須更加努力， 付出更多才可應付! 媽媽： 是啊，你從小就是一個喜歡挑戰的人？ 思灝： 是，你記否自小玩遊戲時我就喜歡挑戰你 和爸爸？ 媽媽： 我就是因為那時你只得四，五歲，你常常 贏出各種用腦筋或記憶的遊戲，而令我對 你有更多的認識，也慢慢學習成為你的「 伯樂」。 思灝： 我記得我們那時常常互相比拼和挑戰，我 知道初時你也偶爾讓着我，後來，你真的 便成了我的手下敗將！ 媽媽： 是嗎？哈哈！ 思灝： 其實，由小時候的貪玩，互動的遊戲，發現 自己是資優，轉校，愛上電腦功課及加上最 重要的跆拳道學習，成就了今天的我…… 媽媽： 再說說過去八年多的跆拳道學習道路上， 對你有什麼得着和影響？ 思灝： 由初學時的「白帶仔」經過長年累月的練 習與一次又一次的考試，一共九次的考帶 過程，達到黑帶的資格。以及參加各種大 大小小的搏擊和套拳比賽。這八年的光景

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令我深深的明白和體會到努力和堅持的重 要性。我亦慢慢學習如何去面對一次又一 次的成功和一次又一次的失敗。最重要 是，此亦同時影響到我讀書的態度，令我 真切的明白世上沒有不勞而獲的事，亦不 感到辛勤是苦事。而且，努力讀書已成了 我的習慣呢！ 媽媽： 今年暑假旅行，你有什麼提議？ 思灝： 媽媽，你忘記了，我們一家下了一戰書 嗎？你記得2012年暑假，我們到西安旅 行的事嗎？ 媽媽： 我當然記得…… 思灝： 那一次的體會真是又深刻又難忘！怎麼能 想像得到我們能做到！從一家開會決定暑 假旅行目的地開始，我們上網找資料，決 定行程，訂酒店……大家都十分興奮和投 入！不過，我知道你為了給我和弟弟一個 超級體驗，你居然……撒謊！ 媽媽： 居然給你看穿了！是，怎可能沒有飛機票 呢！我訂了由深圳到西安的硬座火車票， 就是想你們親身去體驗生活。 思灝： 沒試過是不會知道坐着睡一整夜的滋味。 還有國內長途火車上的情況是難以想像， 垃圾滿地，通道、廁所外都有人躺着、睡 着、坐着。 媽媽： 是啊，就是因為爸爸和我在二十多年前也 曾坐過長途硬座遊西安，所以也希望你們 也可有此經歷。 思灝： 還有最難忘是我們一家從華山山頂一步一 步的步行下山，足有海拔二千多米，其 實，我也沒有想過我們能完成。

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媽媽： 記得當時，我們互相鼓勵，互相扶持， 走到最後一段我的腿已抽筋，不能向前 舉步，祇能往後退下山，你為減輕我的負 擔，替我背背囊，弟弟扶著我一步一步的 提示我如何走，因為我向後看不到路，而 爸爸是一心試鍊你們，讓你們倆負起照顧 媽媽的責任。 思灝： 我是真的想不到，我們那時能克服一個又 一個嚇人的峭壁，我們緊扶着鐵鍊慢慢的 下山，到差不多垂直的地方，你們說不要 往下看，其實那時心裡真的十分害怕，但 看到一家人互相鼓勵，連那時八歲的弟弟 也全力以赴，一點也不退縮，我真的對於 克服困難有更深刻的體會。爸爸說只要謹 慎的看着眼前的一步，一步一步仔細的走 便可，終於我們都排除萬難，到達山腳， 下山時我們興奮的表情仍深深印在腦海 中……回身一看，那麼高的山，真是不能 想像我們能做得到！這次的經驗令我更了 解自己和敢於接受挑戰。 媽媽： 是啊，就是因為爸爸和我在二十多年前也 曾各自坐過長途硬座遊西安，所以也希望 你們也可有此經歷。 思灝： 那麼，你記不記得我們回程時，我們曾經 豪情壯語，下了戰書？ 媽媽： 要一一征服中國五嶽？好！那麼，今年暑 期我就交給你安排了！！

家長園地•Parent Zone

Pursuit of Perfection:

From 5 to 13 Years Old Author: Dash, Sze Ho Tong,

May Chu

Perfectionism is a common personality trait among gifted people. It can be categorised into two types: healthy perfectionism and unhealthy perfectionism.

Healthy perfectionists strive for excellence and enjoy challenges, whereas unhealthy perfectionists set unrealistic goals, always feel inferior and are highly sensitive to criticism.

The following is a real conversation between a mother and her son, Sze Ho. Hopefully it will inspire you to help children develop healthy perfectionism.

S: No. But you tore me to pieces!

M: Mother

S: When I’m playing with my schoolmates.

S: Sze Ho

M: What have I done that has displeased you?

S: First, every time you tell me off. Second, you keep on pushing me to practise when I feel dog-tired.

M: What do you think makes a perfect mother?

S: A perfect mother does not lose temper easily but forgives easily.

M: What do you like doing with me every day?

S: Dining with the family and chatting about the school.

M: How many marks can your father and I get for loving you?

S: Both of you can get 100.

M: Do you think I am the ideal mother?

S: Yes. But I just hope that you don’t scold me too harshly.

M: Did I scold you very often?

M: When do you like being alone, without my company?

M: What do you think you will treat me when you grow up?

S: I’ll reward you and pay you a visit frequently.

I’ll take you to tea. (He often saw me take my mother to tea and it has exerted subtle influence on him.)

M: As a son, what do you think you have done the best?

S: I’ve performed well academically, so Mommy doesn’t have to worry about me.

M: What do you think you have not done well?

S: I lose temper occasionally.

M: On a one-to-ten scale, how many times were you really willing to do what I told you to do?

S: About seven to eight.

M: What’s the most important to you in this world?

S: Family and friends.

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家長園地•Parent Zone

M: What do you pursue in life?

S: Knowledge and academic success.

M: What is the most important to a mother’s relationship with her son?

S: To love each other.

M: What is the most precious?

S: Filial piety.

M: What qualities of mine do you admire?

S: You are clever, kind and you don’t scold me very often.

M: Is there anything else?

S: I think you gave me very helpful guidance on learning and you know how to teach me.

M: What is the most enduring memory you have between us over the past 13 years?

S: Do you still remember we once went to a hot spring together during a trip to Taiwan when I was 5? As soon as I had put on the swimsuit I plunged into the hot spring. Instantly I sank to the bottom of the hot sprint and then you jumped into it to save me straight away. I swallowed a lot of water as I didn’t know how to swim at that time. How hilarious was it!

What’s also pleasant and unforgettable is that our whole family went to Sam Mun Tsai to catch crabs and that we had pizza together.

M: What are you most proud of in your life?

S: First, I won the bronze medal in the Taekwondo competition I joined last summer in Malaysia.

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Second, I’ve made marked improvement in English. Third, I was admitted by Diocesan Boys’ School.

M: Why don’t you mention your achievements in the area of mathematics? You have won a lot of awards.

S: Perhaps because I’ve been strong in maths since a very early age, I’ve already taken the achievements for granted and don’t value them much.

M: Close your eyes and tell me what your happiest moment was.

S: My happiest moment was when I was awarded in the Taekwondo competition though I had felt a surge of panic at some time during the competition.

M: Was there anything that hurt you the most?

S: No. M: What do you think worries Mommy the most?

S: My learning of English. I believe I still have huge room for improvement.

M: What do you think will worry Mommy the most when you grow up?

S: I don’t know.

M: Do you think Mommy would treat you in a different way if you were a girl?

S: You would treat me in more or less the same way. I don’t think there would be any difference.

M: If the person who understands you the most got 100 marks, how many marks would you give me?

家長園地•Parent Zone

S: 90.

M: What accomplishments of yours do you think will make Mommy feel proud?

S: To get a plum job and to join the Hong Kong team.

M: Do you prefer devoting yourself to study or dedicating some time to Taekwondo?

S: Though I’ll have to put in a great deal of effort, I still want to have it both ways.

M: What courses would you like to take at university?

S: I like both arts and science courses.

M: Have you ever thought about setting up your own business?

S: Never. I’m afraid I’ll lose all my money.

M: You were identified to be gifted through taking an IQ test when you were in primary one. What influence did it have on you?

S: At first I felt happy and then I felt I shouldn’t waste my divine gift. I believed I had to study hard instead of thinking only of playing like what I had done in the past.

M: What change did you make after you had been transferred to another school to study primary two?

S: After knowing that I was gifted, I always felt highly motivated to study hard. As I desired to learn to use the computer at that time, you enrolled me in many online courses; Chinese, English, Mathematics, General Studies, all kinds of courses. Since then I became more and

more enthusiastic about doing online exercises, spending at least one hour completing all of them every day, and this activity became the first thing I did at home after school.

M: Do you still remember we brought our passwords with us even when travelling abroad to complete the exercises at hotels or Internet bars? We never skipped a single day because we didn’t want our rank in Hong Kong drop.

S: True! That’s really hilarious. At that time, I didn’t have any chance to play computer games, so once I had a chance to use the computer I was very obsessed. Even though I could only use the computer to do online exercises, I still felt very excited. I was really silly!

M: Then what influence did this experience have on you?

S: It made me become more keen on learning.

Also, through this experience I developed a good habit and I no longer hate doing homework and exercises. Accordingly I did better and better at school; my ranking at school rose gradually from 15 to 2.

M: When you were in primary four, we decided to transfer you to an English primary school for further development; however, considering the difference in English requirements for the two schools, I gave you two suggestions to maintain your competitive edge.

S: Yes. You suggested that I could either repeat primary four or be promoted to primary five at the new school.

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家長園地•Parent Zone

S: All of them are very smart and do very well at school. Each of them has his own strengths and characteristics. I’ve learnt to respect others from them and they’ve pushed me to work harder as I don’t want to lay behind them.

M: What short-term goals do you have?

S: Read more and study hard. I hope to get better academic results and get into an ideal university!

M: What did you think that time?

S: I had some hesitation at first because I did quite well at school. I was ranked second in the whole grade, so I wondered why I needed to repeat. However, after listening to your detailed analysis, I tended to repeat primary four. During the transfer interview, the principal asked two times if I really decided to repeat primary four.

M: You’ve been enrolled in the Hong Kong University of Science and Technology Dual Program. How do you find it?

S: I find it quite difficult. I got to work harder.

M: What do you think of taking more advanced courses?

S: I like challenges but I have to put in more effort to overcome them.

S: Finally I really decided to repeat!

M: Right. You always like challenges.

M: So were you somewhat reluctant to do so?

S: True. Do you remember I liked challenging father and you to games when I was small?

S: No. I didn’t think it mattered. I could accept it.

I believe our decision was right because the English requirements for the two schools were quite different. I took advantage of that repeat year to lay a solid English foundation that benefited my future development and also gave me a big boost in confidence. What’s more, I could get into my favourite school accordingly.

M: What’s your feeling about starting secondary school?

S: I feel very happy because this secondary school is a perfect match for me. I feel like a fish in water, enjoying freedom and having the opportunity and space to fulfil my potential at the same time.

M: What do you think will your secondary school life give you?

M: When you were only four or five, you already won mental games and memory games very often. That made me understand you more and gradually learn to become your “mentor”.

S: I remember we frequently competed against each other and challenged each other at that time. I know that, at the beginning, sometimes you deliberately gave in, but later you’re really defeated by me!

M: Oh, really?

S: Actually, I’ve been shaped by my playfulness of my childhood, interactive games, the discovery of my gift, changing schools, my fondness of online exercises and, the most importantly, learning Taekwondo.

S: A variety of knowledge and a greater improvement in English.

M: Let’s talk more about your learning of Taekwondo over the past 8 years. How has it benefited and influenced you?

M: How about your schoolmates? How do they influence you?

S: From a “white-belt junior” at the very beginning, I underwent hard training for years and nine belt

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家長園地•Parent Zone

tests to get a black belt. I also took part in big and small sparring and patterns competitions.

These eight years made me fully understand and experience the importance of diligence and determination. I’ve learnt step by step how to face failure. Above all else, it has changed my attitude to studies, making me realise that we can’t get something for nothing in the world and that hard work is not drudgery. What’s more, studying hard has become one of my habits!

M: Do you have any suggestions for this year’s summer trip?

S: Mommy, have you forgot that we’ve had our heart set? Do you remember our trip to Xi’an in the summer of 2012?

M: Of course I remember…

S: What an unforgettable experience it was! It’s unbelievable that we could make it! At the beginning, we had a family meeting to decide on the summer trip destination. Then we sought information on the internet, planned the itinerary, book hotels…All of us were very excited and really got into it. But, I know that for the sake of giving me and little brother a big adventure, you told a lie!

M: You saw right through me. True, it’s impossible not to get a flight ticket! I booked hard-seat train tickets from Shenzhen to Xi’an because I wanted you to experience life first-hand.

S: I would never have known the taste of sleeping sitting up the whole night if I had not tried it. And the situation on the train was unimaginable; the floor was full of rubbish and there were people sleeping in the aisles and outside the washrooms.

M: Right. As your father and I had taken a hardseat train to Xi’an some twenty years ago, I also wanted you to have the same experience.

S: And the most unforgettable was walking down from the top of Mount Hua, an altitude of over two thousand metres, step by step! In fact, I

had never imagined that we could finish it.

M: I still remember that we encouraged and supported each other at that time. Towards the end of the journey I got a cramp in the leg, so I couldn’t walk forwards anymore and I could only walk backwards down the mountain.

You carried my backpack to lighten my burden. Your little brother handed me up and guided me down as I could not see the road behind me. Your father was intending to test you two, giving you a chance to take on the responsibility of taking care of your mother.

S: It’s really incredible that we could conquer one precipitous cliff after another. We gripped the iron chain and walked slowly down the cliffs. While reaching the steepest points, you told me not to look down. Actually I was really scared at that time, but when I saw our whole family encouraging each other and even my eight-year-old little brother going all out, I had a deeper understanding of how to cope with difficulties. Father said that we only needed to look carefully at the road ahead and walk carefully step by step. Finally, all of us surmounted every difficulty to arrive at the foot of the mountain. I can still remember vividly our radiant faces at that moment. Glancing back at the lofty mountain, we could hardly believe we had done it! This experience has deepened my understanding of myself and made me dare to take up challenges.

M: Well, isn’t it the best gain? When I saw you and your brother spare no effort in completing the task, I was on cloud nine. This is the best present for parents!

S: So, do you remember we made a boast and had our heart set on a challenge on our way back home?

M: To conquer China’s Five Great Mountains one by one? OK, I’ll let you arrange this year’s summer trip for us.

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資源推介•What’s Recommended

Book Title:

Letting go of Perfect: Overcoming Perfectionism in Kids

Author:

Jill L. Adelson and Hope E. Wilson

Year:

2009

Publisher:

Prufrock Press Inc.

ISBN:

978-1-59363-362-2

筆者相信，讀者很容易發現朋友表現出完美主義的特質，他們可能在工 作或處事方面一絲不苟。雖然很多讀者也明白適當的自我要求對事情的 質素有一定幫助，但卻未必知道如何分辨箇中好處和壞處、對自己和同 伴的影響，以及這樣會否成為達成目標的障礙等。此外，讀者又有否想 過，當家中孩子表現完美主義特質時又應如何處理呢？ 在Letting go of Perfect: Overcoming Perfectionism in Kids一書中，作者 針對不同類型的完美主義特質／傾向，把孩子、家長和老師心中的疑問 也一一解答。這本書載有大量幫助孩子處理有關完美主義問題的實際建 議，作者按「壓力指數」、「拖延」、「害怕失敗」或是「自我要求」 等課題，帶領讀者從孩子、家長和老師的角度分析和了解其中細節。 作者先在書的開首介紹完美主義的背景資料和有關研究，並以「解開完 美主義之謎」作為第1章節，重新解釋七個誤解，例如「只有一種完美主 義類型」、「完美主義只會帶來壞處」、「只有資優兒童才會出現完美 主義」等等，讓讀者明白這些誤解如何影響孩子成長發展。 書中的第3至第7章節逐一介紹了五種類型的完美主義者，包括「品學兼 優者」、「重視準確的審核員」、「風險逃避者」、「形象管理者」和 「拖延性的完美主義者」，而這五種完美主義也是Adelson於2007年在 Gifted Child Today發表題為「A ‘Perfect’ Case Study: Perfectionism in Academically Talented Fourth Graders」的研究報告中所提出的。作者利 用小插圖和實例闡述了各種完美主義者所表現出的行為，再深入分析其 特徵及形成原因，並提供了在家庭和學校中協助他們的不同方法。 接著，作者列舉了健康和不健康完美主義的分別和辨別的工具，並根據 這種分別從另外一個角度分析在家庭及學校該如何協助這些完美主義的 孩子，例如為他們安排一些課堂小遊戲和活動，或是鼓勵他們在家中跟 兄弟姊妹合製手工藝品，以及給他們提供高質素的「家庭時間」等。此 外，作者亦集中講解如何找尋和善用「危機時間」處理孩子完美主義的 問題。最後，作者在第11和12章節分享了其他可幫助這類孩子的額外資 源，如故事書、網站、文章和電影等等。 筆者發現，書中建議其實不只適用於資優兒童。作者所著重的是讓讀者 明白孩子的感受和想法，教導他們如何改變孩子的生活態度和對事情 的看法。另外，作者也希望讀者反思其家庭生活怎樣促使孩子形成完美 主義的特質。全書當中，筆者最欣賞的是有關高質素「家庭時間」的分 享，作者點出了親子時間的話題和孩子重視學業成績的影響，更提出了 其他輕鬆有趣的親子活動供讀者參考，如家庭活動投票、製訂時間表、 分析比較性目標和個人性目標的分別等。

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Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

Synopsis The book gives parents and teachers the guidance and support that they need to help children break free of the anxieties and behaviors related to perfectionism. Some students might think “My best is never good enough”. It could lead to excessive guilt, lack of motivation, low self-esteem, depression, pessimism, obsessive and compulsive behavior, and a sense of rigidity, etc. The authors share strategies to help students effectively control their perfectionistic tendencies and, in return, take those as their strengths. They also delineate the major types of perfectionists and provide practical tips at home and school.

活動花絮•Event Highlights 正念︰資優兒家長 的壓力管理 Mindfulness: Stress Management for Parents of Gifted Children

日期 Date

2014年1月11及25日 (星期六) 11 & 25 January 2014 (Saturday)

時間 Time

上午10:00 - 中午12:00 10:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑303室 Location Room 303, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

教育心理學家朱可達博士 Dr. Matthew Chu, Educational Psychologist

題號 Number

問題 Question

平均分 Average

Q1

題目具關聯性 The topic is relevant

3.80

Q2

講座內容加深了我對相關題目的認識 The content enhances my understanding of this topic

3.80

Q3

內容具啟發性 The content is inspiring

3.80

Q4

講者有豐富的知識 The speaker is knowledgeable

3.80

Q5

講者能清楚地表達講題 The speaker presents the topic clearly

3.80

Q6

是次講座地點合適 The venue of the workshop is appropriate

3.80

Q7

開始的時間合適 The starting time is appropriate

3.80

家長「資」音人網絡 (小學部及中學部) Parent Peer Support Group (Primary + Secondary)

3.80 / 4 日期 Date

2014年2月5日 (星期三) 5 February 2014 (Wednesday)

時間 Time

晚上7:30 - 9:30 7:30 - 9:30 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑105室 Location Room 105, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

香港資優教育學苑教育顧問冼可琳女士 Ms. Tiffany Sin, Education Advisor, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education

家長回饋 1. 參加這小組讓我明白到盡早知道孩子是資優很重 要。 2. 這小組令我了解到小朋友的心路歷程，讓我學會有 系統地栽培他們，鼓勵他們學習。

Feedback of the Parents 1. This group made me realise the importance of identifying giftedness as early as possible.

2. This group enabled me to understand the development of children’s mentality and I have learnt to nurture them systematically and encourage them to learn.

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

43

活動花絮•Event Highlights 認識及處理資優生 的情緒和行為困難 Understanding and Managing gifted children with emotional and behavioural difficulties

日期 Date

2014年2月8、15、22日及3月1日 (星期六) 8, 15, 22 February and 1 March 2014 (Saturday)

時間 Time

上午10:00 - 中午12:00 10:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑204室 Location Room 204, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

教育心理學家戴偉堂先生 Mr. Darren Dai, Educational Psychologist

題號 Number

問題 Question

平均分 Average

Q1

題目具關聯性 The topic is relevant

3.75

Q2

講座內容加深了我對相關題目的認識 The content enhances my understanding of this topic

3.75

Q3

內容具啟發性 The content is inspiring

3.75

Q4

講者有豐富的知識 The speaker is knowledgeable

3.88

Q5

講者能清楚地表達講題 The speaker presents the topic clearly

3.75

Q6

是次講座地點合適 The venue of the workshop is appropriate

3.00

Q7

開始的時間合適 The starting time is appropriate

3.38

3.78 / 4

家長回饋 1. 我將運用學到的技巧解決孩子的問題。 2. 我明白到應在孩子平靜時與他傾談，以了解他背後的 想法和感受。 3. 我們必須先自我反省， 先改變自己才能改變孩子。

Feedback of the Parents 1. I’ll use the skills I picked up to solve my children’s problems.

2. I realise that I should talk to the children when they are calm so that I can understand their thoughts and feelings.

3. We should first reflect on ourselves and change ourselves before we can change our children.

培育高階思維

日期 Date

2014年2月20日 (星期四) 20 February 2014 (Thursday)

Nurturing Higher Order Thinking (in English)

時間 Time

晚上7:30 - 9:30 7:30 - 9:30 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑403室 Location Room 403, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

香港資優教育學苑教育心理學家程永德先生 Mr. Victor Ching, Educational Psychologist, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education

題號 Number

問題 Question

平均分 Average

Q1

題目具關聯性 The topic is relevant

3.67

Q2

講座內容加深了我對相關題目的認識The content enhances my understanding of this topic

3.75

Q3

內容具啟發性 The content is inspiring

3.58

Q4

講者有豐富的知識 The speaker is knowledgeable

3.67

Q5

講者能清楚地表達講題 The speaker presents the topic clearly

3.67

Q6

是次講座地點合適 The venue of the workshop is appropriate

3.08

Q7

開始的時間合適 The starting time is appropriate

3.25

3.67 / 4

家長回饋 1. 我學會使用布魯姆分類法。 2. 要把孩子教育得更好，家長就應思考更多。 3. 我意識到要從客觀的角度看待自己的教養方法。 4. 我學會了幾種跟子女溝通的方式。

44

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

Feedback of the Parents 1. I have learnt to use Bloom’s taxonomy.

2. Parents should think more in order to teach the children better.

3. I realise that I should take an objective view of my parenting.

4. I have learnt some ways to talk to my children.

活動花絮•Event Highlights 協助中學資優生 生涯規劃 Helping Secondary Gifted Students in Career Planning

日期 Date

2014年2月21及28日 (星期五) 21 and 28 February 2014 (Friday)

時間 Time

晚上7:30 - 9:30 7:30 - 9:30 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑303室 Location Room 303, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

題號 Number

香港中文大學專業進修學院社會科學及教育學部總監崔日雄博士 Dr. Chui Yat Hung, Head, Social Sciences and Education Division, School of Continuing and Professional Studies, The Chinese University of Hong Kong

問題 Question

平均分 Average

Q1

題目具關聯性 The topic is relevant

3.63

Q2

講座內容加深了我對相關題目的認識The content enhances my understanding of this topic

3.50

Q3

內容具啟發性 The content is inspiring

3.50

Q4

講者有豐富的知識 The speaker is knowledgeable

3.88

Q5

講者能清楚地表達講題 The speaker presents the topic clearly

3.50

Q6

是次講座地點合適 The venue of the workshop is appropriate

3.00

Q7

開始的時間合適 The starting time is appropriate

3.13

3.60 / 4

家長回饋 1. 是次講座令我對生涯規劃的方法及家長應持的心態 了解多了。 2. 透過這次講座我對自己的兒子認識深了，我也會與 他分享更多。 3. 我不但學到甚麼是生涯規劃，更認識到人生目標的 重要性。 4. 講座令我明白孩子需要從小輔導，潛移默化。

家長「資」音人網絡 (小學部及中學部) Parent Peer Support Group (Primary and Secondary)

Feedback of the Parents 1. The seminar gave me better understanding of career planning and I have learnt the right attitude for parents to take.

2. I’ve had better understanding of my son through this seminar and I will share more with him.

3. Not only have I learnt what career planning is, but also the importance of life goal.

4. The seminar made me realise that children need guidance since a very early age to let them learn imperceptibly.

日期 Date

2014年3月5日 (星期三) 5 March 2014 (Wednesday)

時間 Time

晚上7:30 - 9:30 7:30 - 9:30 p.m.

地點 新界沙田沙角邨香港資優教育學苑105室 Location Room 105, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education, Sha Kok Estate, Sha Tin 講者 Speaker

香港資優教育學苑教育顧問冼可琳女士 Ms. Tiffany Sin, Education Advisor, The Hong Kong Academy for Gifted Education

家長回饋 1. 家長支持對開發孩子潛能來說非常重要。十分精彩！ 2. 對推動孩子學習來說很有幫助。 3. 我 的 女 兒 有 著 跟 V i t a e b e l l a 一 樣 的 夢 想 ， 她 從 Vitaebella的分享裡得到很大啟發。

Feedback of the Parents 1. Parents’ support is very important to developing children’s potential. Very impressive!!

2. Very good for facilitating other children’s learning.

3. My daughter has the same dream as Vitaebella, and she found great inspiration from Vitaebella’s sharing.

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

45

學苑動向•Forthcoming Academy Events

學苑動向

Forthcoming Academy Events

家長支援服務 Parent Support Jun - Oct 2014 2014年6月至10月

免費到校家長講座 Free-of-charge Outreach Parent Seminars 課程 Programme

形式 Format

資優基本法 ABCs of Giftedness

以校本形式提供1.5小時的講座，歡迎學校及機構致電3940 0104預 約及查詢。 A 1.5-hour school-based seminar will be provided. Schools and organisations are welcome to call 3940 0104 for details and appointment. 以同一辦學團體，或最少三間學校，或多於二百位與會者名義提出 的申請，將獲優先考慮。 Priority will be given to applications by the same school sponsoring bodies; or a joint-school event; or an event with more than 200 participants.

如何培育資優兒 Nurturing the Gifted 情意百寶袋 Affective Needs of Gifted Children 解開創造力之謎 Nurturing Creativity in Young Gifted Learners 高階思維 Higher Order Thinking

家長教育課程 Parent Education Programme 日期及時間 Date and Time

課程 Programme Title

培訓對象 Target

發展雙重特殊資優兒的執行功能 Developing Executive Skills for twice exceptional children

資優兒的家長（本學苑的學員家長優先） Parents of gifted children (for SPS members)

12/7/2014（六/Sat） 1430-1630

家長講座暨家長學堂證書頒授 2014 Seminar & PEP Certificates Presentation 2014

資優兒的家長 Parents of gifted children

12/9/2014（五/Fri） 1930-2130

為學習引擎加油 Fuel the engine of learning

資優兒的家長 Parents of gifted children

專注力訓練的親子平衡小組 Concentration Training Group for Parents and their Gifted Children

小一至小六資優兒的家長（本學苑的學員家長 優先） Parents of gifted primary students (P.1 - P.6) (for SPS members)

遊戲治療對資優兒童的幫助工作坊 Play Therapy Workshop for Gifted Children

資優兒的家長 Parents of gifted children

3/6, 2/9, 7/10/2014（二/Tue） 1930-2130

同儕支援小組（中學組） Parent peer support group (Secondary)

資優兒的家長 Parents of gifted children

4/6, 3/9, 8/10/2014（三/Wed） 1930-2130

同儕支援小組（小學組） Parent peer support group (Primary)

資優兒的家長 Parents of gifted children

5/6, 4/9, 9/10/2014（四/Thur） 1930-2130

同儕支援小組（小學組） Parent peer support group (Primary)

學苑學員家長 Parents of gifted children (SPS members)

家長小組 Parent group 6, 13, 20 & 27/6/2014（五/Fri） 1930-2130 家長講座 Parent seminar

親子平衡小組 Parent-child parallel group 4, 11, 18 & 25/10/2014（二/Tue） 1930-2130

家長工作坊 Parent workshop 6 & 13/6/2014（五/Fri） 1930-2130 同儕支援小組 Parent peer support group

上述課程資料以本學苑網頁內公佈為準，請登入學苑網站內的「家長園地」查閱詳情。網址：www.hkage.org.hk The above information provided is subject to confirmation. Please visit the “Parent Zone” of our website: www.hkage.org.hk for details. 諮詢及評估中心 Consultation and Assessment Centre 熱線電話 Hotline：3940 0106 電郵 Email：consultation@hkage.org.hk

46

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

學苑動向•Forthcoming Academy Events

教師專業發展課程 Teacher Professional Development Programmes Jun - Oct 2014 2014年6月至10月

教師專業發展架構課程 Professional Development Pathways 日期及時間 Date and Time

課程 Programme Title

培訓對象 Target

全年任何時間 All year round

資優教育基礎課程 （網上學習：四個單元） Foundation Course in Gifted Education (Online Learning: 4 modules)

中、小學學校專業同工 Primary and secondary school practitioners

小學場次 Pri Session 1. 網上學習 Online learning

12.9.2013-19.6.2014

面授課程 Face-to-face session

20.6.2014（五/Fri）

1400-1800

資優教育進階課程：領導與管理 （新辦混合學習模式：三個單元） Intermediate Course in Gifted Education: Leadership and Management (New Blended Learning Mode: 3 modules)

資優教育行政主管：建議由校長、副校長或獲 委派的主任擔任此職務，專責管理校本資優教 育的整體規劃。

中學場次 Sec Session 1. 網上學習 Online learning

12.9.2013-26.6.2014

面授課程 Face-to-face session

27.6.2014（五/Fri）

1400-1800

資優教育統籌主任：建議由課程發展主任、 科主任或獲委派的主任擔任此職務，專責統 籌著重提昇課程規劃與教學素質的校本資優 培育計畫 GE Managers (principals, vice-principals or delegated staff) and GE Coordinators (curriculum leaders, subject panel heads or delegated members) in primary/secondary schools

專題講座/工作坊 Thematic Seminars or Workshops 日期及時間 Date and Time

課程 Programme Title

培訓對象 Target

16.5.2014（五/Fri） 1500-1700

學校資優教育政策：發展與實踐 GE Policy in School: Development and Implementation

中小學校長、課程領導、科主任及教師 Principals, Curriculum leaders/subject panel heads and teachers in primary and secondary schools

15.7.2014（二/Tue） 1430-1730

推行適異性教學 (小學場次)(郭靜姿教授) Differentiation in Action (Primary School Session) (Prof. KUO Ching-chih)

小學課程領導、科主任及教師 Curriculum leaders/subject panel heads and teachers in primary schools

16.7.2014（三/Wed） 1430-1730

推行適異性教學 (中學場次)(郭靜姿教授) Differentiation in Action (Secondary School Session) (Prof. KUO Ching-chih)

中學課程領導、科主任及教師 Curriculum leaders/subject panel heads and teachers in secondary schools

11.10.2014（六/Sat） （a.m.）

資優生生涯規劃 Career planning for the gifted

中學教師、學生輔導教師、學校社工及駐校教 育心理學家 Teachers, guidance teachers, school social workers and educational psychologists in secondary schools

上述課程資料以本學苑網頁內公佈為準，請登入學苑網站內的「教師園地」查閱詳情。網址：www.hkage.org.hk The above information provided is subject to confirmation. Please visit the “Teacher Zone” of our website: www.hkage.org.hk for details.

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

47

學苑動向•Forthcoming Academy Events

學生服務 Student Programmes and Services Jun - Oct 2014 2014年6月至10月

中學課程 人文學科 Humanities 藝術與心理學工作坊 Introductory Workshop in Art and Psychology 心理學進階課程 Intermediate Course in Psychology 英文辯論進階課程 Intermediate Workshop in English Presentation Skills 英文詩與英文歌基礎課程 Introductory Course in English Poem and Songs 英文古典文學基礎課程 Introductory Course in English Classical Literature 英文創意寫作基礎課程 Introductory Course in English Creative Writing 領導才能 Leadership 創業工作坊 Entrepreneurship Workshop 領袖談判工作坊 Negotiation Workshop for Leaders 有效領導與社會服務 Effective Leadership and Social Service Projects 領袖道德操守與價值探討 Ethical Leadership and Value Study 傳意 – 公開演說工作坊 Communication Skills - Public Speaking Workshop 傳意 – 辯論工作坊 Communication Skills- Debating Workshop 授權技能及資源管理 Delegation and Resources Allocation 新一代社會領袖 Leaders for the New Generation 全球化與領導 Globalization and Leadership 資優天使 – 服務學習計劃 Gifted Angel Service Learning Project 數學 Mathematics 摺紙基礎課程 Introductory Course in Origami 數學燃動課程系列：幾何 Maths Ignition Series: Geometry 國際數學奧林匹克：第一階段 IMO Training – Phase I

48

概率面面觀二 Probability in Action II

細胞深究 Deep Cells

統計學進階課程 Intermediate Course in Statistics

人體望聞問 Diagnose and Treat

統計學基礎課程 Introductory Course in Statistics

數學縱橫 Maths Extension Through Breath & Depth

科學 Sciences

公關大作戰 Take Me Seriously

化學深造課程 Advanced Course in Chemistry 電腦遊戲設計進階課程 Intermediate Course in Computer Game Design

幾何學二 Geometry II 心理學三 Psychology III

個人成長及社交發展 Personal growth and social development

溝通與新媒體：今昔發展 Communication and New Media: From Now to Then

腦基礎學習工作坊(基礎課程) Brain-based Learning Workshop (Introductory)

複數與幾何學（一） Complex Number and Geometry 1

分享環節 Sharing Session

複數與幾何學（二） Complex Number and Geometry 2

與『完美主義』有約工作坊 Date with "Perfectionism"

電學 Electricity

人際技巧 Interpersonal Skills

中國研究 China Studies

自我認識 Self-understanding

「粒粒」皆不同 ABC = Atoms & Bondings in Chemistry

抗逆戰士大召集 (初中歷奇日營) Call to All Building Resilience (Junior adventure day-camp)

講座 Talk

抗逆戰士大召集 (高中歷奇日營) Call to All Building Resilience (Senior adventure day-camp)

僕人領導 Servant Leadership

跨學科主題研習 Multidisciplinary Theme Based Learning 網上學習課程 Online Learning Programme 心理學二 Psychology II 物理力學一 Physics I 物理力學二 Physics II 英語本色 How Do you Mean 心中有數 Taking Shape

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

歷史領袖 Leaders in History

生涯規劃 Career Planning 其他學習活動 Other Learning Activities 愛•社區2014：第二擊 LOVE•Community 2014: Strike 2 2014年第17屆吳健雄科學營 17th Wu Chien-Shiung Science Camp 2014 比賽 Competition 2014國際初中科學奧林匹克 – 香港 選拔賽 International Junior Science Olympiad - Hong Kong Screening 2014

學苑動向•Forthcoming Academy Events

小學課程 語文 Languages 藝術評賞與創作 Art Appreciation & Creation I 音樂欣賞 Music Appreciation I 戲劇訓練 I Drama Production I 立體藝術創作 Art Creation in Diorama Structure 中國文學欣賞 I Chinese Literature Appreciation I 中國文學欣賞 II Chinese Literature Appreciation II 中文創意寫作 Chinese Creative Writing 劇本創作 Chinese Script Writing 中文辯論訓練 Chinese Speaking & Debate

哲學入門︰倫理學 Introduction to Philosophy: Ethics

熱學1，初談「熱」話 Heat 1, The Heat is On

哲學入門︰愛智慧的四個人生課題 Intorduction to Philosophy: Love of Wisdom

力學1，機械製作 Mechanics 1, Build You Own Machines

小建築師訓練 To be a Architect

機械人2, 潛水尋寶機械人 Robotics 2, Scavenger Robot Submarine

小樹藝師訓練 To be a Arborist

天文學1，天外世界 Astronomy 1, Beyond the Sky

小記者訓練 To be a Journalist

細胞生物學1，細胞世界歡迎你 Cell Biology 1, Welcome to the Cell World

批判思維訓練 Critical Thinking

電學2，磁學與電磁學 Electricity 2, Magnetism and Electromagnetism

領導才能 Leadership 答問溝通工作坊 Communication Skills - Questioning, Listening & Speaking Workshop 資優天使-服務學習計劃 Gifted Angel Service Learning Project

生物科學探究 Scientific Investigation in Biology 破解案發現場 Crime Scene Investigation

數學 Mathematics

LED小電筒 LED Torch DIY

摺通數學2 Fold Up Paper, Brush Up Math 2

同一海岸上 On the Same Coast

3-D幾何、「圓」妙無窮 Shape up your Math

熱學2，再談「熱」話 Heat 2, More Heat is On

智破計數機 Number Theory - Beat the Calculator

網上學習課程 Online Learning Programme

英國文學欣賞 I English Literature Appreciation I

數學起動 2 Open Up Your Mind 2

英國文學欣賞 II English Literature Appreciation II

數學魔術與代數增潤 Algebra – Math Magic and Algebra Enrichment

哲學初階：愛智慧的四個人生課題 Introduction to Philosophy: Love of Wisdom

讀書會 Reading Club & Workshop 演說訓練 Speech Presentation 中文閱讀深造 Reading Beyond Comprehension in Chinese

英文創意寫作 English Creative Writing 英文劇本創作 English Script Writing

角、線、圖形與幾何作圖 Geometry - Line, Angle, Shape and Geometrical Construction

網上學習課程 – 座標幾何 I Online Learning Programme – Coordinate Geometry I 講座 Talk

科學 Sciences

歷史領袖 Leaders in History

英文演說訓練 English Public Speaking

機械人1, 拔河機械人 Robotics 1, Tug of War Robot

其他學習活動 Other Learning Activities

英文閱讀深造 Reading Beyond Comprehension in English

酸鹼化學1，晶體世界 Acid-Base Chemistry 1, Crystal World

愛•社區2014：第三擊 LOVE•Community 2014: Strike 3

趣味英語 Funny English Exploitation

化學反應1，金屬反應 Chemical Reaction 1, Metal Reactions

上述各項活動資料以本學苑網頁內公佈為準。請登入學苑網站內的「學生園地」查閱詳情。網址：www.hkage.org.hk The above information provided is subject to confirmation. Please visit the “Student Zone” of our website: www.hkage.org.hk for details.

Nurturing the Gifted • May 2014 • Issue No. 13

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