How does the psychological attachment to objects influence an individual’s experience of strength and fragility in the context of grief?
Jade Kondal
Submitted to Hereford College of Arts In partial fulfilment of the requirements for the degree of BA (Hons) Jewellery Design
Validated by the University of Wales Trinity St David
Full Word Count: 10467 Edited Word Count: 5043
Table of Contents
Introduction....................................................................................................................... 3 Chapter 1 – Understanding Grief and How to Navigate It. .................................................. 4 Chapter 2: The Profound Relationship We Have with Objects: how has consumerism changed our relationship with objects?.............................................................................. 7 Chapter 3: An evaluation of Rauni Higson’s Chockstones through semiotics..................... 10 Chapter 4: An Analysis and Evaluation of Case Studies. .................................................... 15 Chapter 5: How does this information relate to my own practice and healing process after loss? ................................................................................................................................ 18 Conclusion. ...................................................................................................................... 21 Reference List. ................................................................................................................. 22 Bibliography. ................................................................................................................... 24 Appendix 1. ..................................................................................................................... 27 Appendix 2. ..................................................................................................................... 28 List of Illustrations. .......................................................................................................... 42
2
How does the psychological attachment to objects influence an individual’s experience of strength and fragility in the context of grief?
Introduction.
In the intricacy of human experience, there is often an overlooked, however profoundly impactful thread; the psychological connection we have with objects. Objects have historically served as far more than simple inanimate possessions; they are memories, storytellers, and companions. This paper explores the intricate relationship between psychological attachment to objects and the emotions of strength and fragility, specifically in the context of bereavement, mourning and coping with grief. Grief is a universal experience that highlights various emotions, ranging from sorrow to resilience, strength, and vulnerability. Interestingly, this journey is far from uniform and differs hugely from culture to culture. It is shaped predominantly by our unique relationship with the objects we surround ourselves with. This paper’s central exploration is to prove that the psychological attachments we create during grief provide a continued relationship with the deceased, precipitating emotions of both strength and fragility. This paper has many layers in which to investigate. There will be a focus on the depths of human psychology, human attachment to objects, and the transformative power of loss. By looking at these delicate relationships, the aim is to highlight the processes relating to our emotional responses and coping strategies during times of loss. The research will not be limited to theories of attachment; it will venture into the lived experiences of individuals who have navigated through grief and their relationship with objects during the mourning process. The following chapters will cover the areas of psychology, theories of attachment, resilience, and their crossovers, and the transformative outcomes that can accrue after loss will be recognised, leaving the human spirit and self either shattered or fortified. There will be a semiotic investigation into the artworks of Rauni Higson (2021) and the negotiated meanings embodied in her work, and how these theories and aesthetics influence my work and my grieving process. 3
Chapter 1 – Understanding Grief and How to Navigate It.
To fully understand the potential impact of grief, we must look at the process that comes immediately after loss - mourning. Sigmond Freud (1914) describes mourning as a transient process with a definitive end. Once experienced, this process can have both positive and motivational outcomes, thus allowing the mourner to re-engage with society and the everyday world, regardless of the extreme change experienced through loss. Freud also does not limit the word mourning simply to the loss of a person, stating, "Mourning is regularly the reaction to the loss of a loved person, or to the loss of some abstraction which has taken the place of one, such as one’s country, liberty, an ideal [...]" (Freud, 1914 - 1916). Although this paper explores mourning specifically for the loss of loved ones, it is essential to understand that mourning has a much broader scope, even when explicitly thinking of a loved one. The sensation of mourning can echo through an entire community, creating a much larger and more profound level of grief. This more comprehensive loss can cause not only implications for self through re-adjusting to life after the loss, but it can also create a sense of loss in many areas of the everyday experience. Mourning is a painful experience with a definitive end, but the process has no real-time constraints and varies hugely from person to person. There are multiple stages of mourning which consist of "[…] denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.” (Cruse, 2023). During the first three stages, there is a tendency to try and immortalise the lost person through "remembering, repeating and working through of memories continues as the mourner replaces the lost person with an imaginary presence" (Ayling-Smith, 2016). This immortalisation can show itself through a wide variety of methods. However, for this paper, the focus will be on the use of inanimate objects to further the connection with the lost, providing an additional strength during the incredibly vulnerable journey through grief. "This 'magical resurrection allows the mourner to prolong the existence of the lost person' […] until the mourner eventually comes to realise that the deceased person no longer exists. (O’Neill cited by Ayling-Smith, 2016) When looking at the stages of grief, if the use of objects can help immortalise the dead, can they then help you through your mourning process? Can the relationship with these objects deepen or at least continue the connection with the loved one? These conversations and memories can inform the healing process, potentially guiding mourners through the journey. 4
Figure 1. The Grief Wheel, Errol Hale, 2023.
Freud also talks of a more profound effect of grief, melancholia. Freud describes melancholia as a profoundly painful experience causing a complete loss of interest in the everyday world and a deep depression, which ultimately highlights the loss of our ability to love, either for the self or for others. This more profound sensation causes huge and potentially irrevocable implications to the self and is far from a transient or transformative experience. Freud states "The distinguishing mental features of melancholia are a profoundly painful dejection, cessation of interest of the outside world, loss of the capacity to love, inhibition of all activity, and a lowering of the self-regarding feelings to a degree that finds utterance in self-reproaches and self- reviling’s and culminates in a delusional expectation of punishment." (Freud, 1914 - 1916). It is then likely that the connection with objects through this deep routed form of grief will serve no purpose for healing or aiding the transitional and transformative elements of the
5
journey. The likelihood is that the connection to objects will hold the mourner in deep depression, preventing the ability to accept and perpetuating the delusion; the loss is a punishment of self. Using objects during mourning can have positive and negative outcomes for the mourner. There is then an area of investigation as to whether these objects can change their importance if melancholia is defeated. The grieving process has historically been undervalued and overlooked, and to talk about this process has been somewhat taboo. "Mourning is treated as if it were a weakness, a self-indulgence, a reprehensible bad habit instead of a psychological necessity" (Parkes, 1986, p. 160). Is there a possibility that this stigma around talking about these stages of grief drives us to a more profound depression, causing melancholia? There is value in "Memorialising, remembering, knowing the person who has died and allowing them to influence the present […]" (P R Silverman, 1996). The idea that the passing of a loved one relates to the end of the relationship is a challenging and unrealistic thought to bare. All relationships have lasting effects and echo the sense of self indefinitely, so continuing the connection is bound to have profound effects. There seems to be a definitive difference between the way people suffer from loss, with some seemingly being able to work through the process of grieving and navigate through everyday life, regardless of the emotional turmoil. In contrast, others move into a much deeper form of debilitating depression. Can this difference be explicitly determined by the individual’s ways of thinking, or does the difference come from other areas of life and living? Can objects play a part in the way we heal? “Without external props even our own personal identity fades and goes out of focus; the self is a fragile construction of the mind.” (Csikszentmihalyi, 1993, p. 22). If the objects around us can impact the self, it only seems natural that these objects can aid the healing process and keep a stronger connection to the deceased. Does immortalising the dead through relationships with objects allow us to live with the essence of a person? Keeping this relationship alive, so to speak, can be challenging and painful; however, continuing the relationship can also be reassuring and comforting.
6
Chapter 2: The Profound Relationship We Have with Objects: how has consumerism changed our relationship with objects?
In the West, consumerism is rife and “refers to the tendency of people living in a capitalist economy to engage in a lifestyle of excessive materialism that revolves around reflexive, wasteful, or conspicuous overconsumption.” (Hayes, 2022). This is likely to change an individual's response to objects. Because of the continued pressure to embody status through the newest gadgets or objects, we have an abundance of belongings that are inevitably only in our possessions for a false sense of achievement; we use objects to enhance our social stance, often being criticised that “consumerism can lead to a materialistic society that neglects other values.” (Hayes, 2022). This behaviour profoundly affects how we perceive ourselves and interact with such objects. "Consumption is 'influenced' by culture: for example, that individuals normally act on their own private desires but are sometimes pressured in other directions by cultural forces" (Slater, 1997, p. 133). How objects are purchased now is impacted by how we are perceived by others, not down to the individuals needs to strengthen one’s identity. These objects then act as nothing more than a boost of ego; they cannot act as pillars of strength through vulnerable times. If anything, they will highlight a sense of insecurity and fragility. The relationship with objects changing for these consumers and status reasons can only create more anxiety and pressure. Instead of strengthening identity and the self, it poses a false sense of identity, leaving us unworthy and unsure. There are also negative connotations with this mass consumption, that our relationships with others could be diminished, "To pay attention to things is seen as a diminution in our capacity to appreciate person to person." (Slater, 1997, p. 27 ). If the objects surrounding us are purchased through a personal desire, or gifted for more profound connection with others, our relationship with objects and others are continually feeding each other, enriching both relationships.
7
Figure 2. Buying Cycle, Neil Patel, 2023.
There is a long history of using objects to continue human connection. These objects are called attachment objects. Attachment objects are often used to replace a caregiver and are seen frequently in young children, a favourite teddy, a blanket, etc. These objects act as comfort and a way of self-soothing at young ages. These objects can, and often do, translate into adulthood. "Attachment objects are a particular class of objects which […] provoke specific emotions related to the intense closeness we feel with our caregivers as a child and with close loved ones as adults in relationships in which we feel supported and cared for." (Spikins, 2018, p. 26). Attachment objects are then not intrinsic to our childhood but can be items gifted at any point during our lives. These attachment objects can then be formed at any age and re-affirm the connection and relationships with loved ones. These objects then act as a potential reminder and are instrumental to our sense of value in the world. They physically represent the love and gratitude people attribute to others. These types of objects then, although still attachment objects, are not limited to a sense of security but to a richer sense of self and can be used predominantly as items for strength. When we are in times of strife, these objects perform as hope and remind us that emotional times, such as grief, are transient and will end. Having such objects around can then reduce our chances of falling into deep depression and melancholia. The objects act as emotional support and allow us the strength of self through moments of self-deformation. 8
Objects act as a fundamental form of self-identity and are as significant as those we share in our lives. It is important to remember that the objects we choose to adorn ourselves with can "[…] reveal the continuity of self through time, by providing foci of involvement in the present, mementos and souvenirs of the past, and signposts to future goals." (Csikszentmihalyi, 1993, p. 22). Objects profoundly impact the sense of self, so navigating grief through objects seems natural. With objects acting as mementos of the past, particular objects affect our ability to heal, and the effects can be immeasurable. These objects, whether photographs, pillows, or inherited jewellery, would act solely to further the connection with the deceased; for example, a photograph will evoke a memory of a lived experience or even a story told, and a pillow will remind us of the scent, a piece of jewellery will evoke the essence of the person. In some way, these objects continue the relationship, immortalising the lost. These objects can also serve as beacons of strength through what can be considered a person's most vulnerable time. This navigation through objects "[…] often have great symbolic significance reminding us of what was precious about those whom we have lost and being something tangible to hold on to." (Abrams cited by McCalman, 2001).
9
Chapter 3: An evaluation of Rauni Higson’s Chockstones through semiotics.
“ A sign … [in the form of a representamen] is something which stands to somebody for something in some respect or capacity. It addresses somebody, that is, creates in the mind of that person an equivalent sign, or perhaps or more developed sign. That sign which it creates I call the interpretant of the first sign. The signs stands for something, its object. It stands for that object, not in all respects, but in reference to a sort of idea, which I have sometimes called the ground of the representamen. (Pierce, 1931-58, 2.228).” (Chandler, 2007, p. 13).
Figure 3. Pierce’s triadic model of a semiotic system, W Nielsen.
Charles Sanders Peirce is one of the founders of semiotics. According to Pierce's triadic semiotic theory, signs comprise of three elements - the sign (representamen), the objects it represents, and the interpretant. This dynamic process highlights signs' interdependence and ongoing interpretation, leading to a comprehensive comprehension of meaning in diverse scenarios and over time. According to Pierce's triadic theory, it involves a complex interplay of signs when applied to grief. The sign, or representamen, represents the emotional response and connection to the object of loss. As one goes through the grieving process, the interpretant develops and evolves, reflecting the nuanced emotional states experienced. The strength of emotions, ranging from anger to acceptance, forms a dynamic continuum that
10
illustrates the intricate web of meaning. At the same time, fragility becomes apparent as vulnerability and sadness are woven into the interpretant, revealing the delicate balance of the human experience. Pierce's framework highlights how grief's triadic dance captures the resilience, strength, and fragility in navigating emotions during the mourning process. As Terdiman states; “[…] not only does remembering mean changing in Freud: meaning means changing too. The fundamental interpretive rule of psychoanalysis thus is: everything is transformed, everything requires interpretation. No psychic content gives itself to us unmediated; none carries transparent significance.” (Terdiman, 1997, p. 300). Therefore, we can conclude that through Peirce’s triadic theory when looking at loss, our continual emotional impermanence through our interpretations, always illustrates a new or deeper understanding within our individual and collective human experience. There is a duality within our emotional resilience as we perpetually evolve through our emotions regarding mourning and loss, strength, and fragility. Semiotics offers a fascinating exploration into the artworks of Rauni Higson (2021), unearthing many layers of meaning. Higson is deeply inspired by nature, and the connection between hand and material. All of Higson’s works are created by hand and hammer, embodying a true and personal connection with every piece. The specific artworks investigated through semiotics will be Higson’s ‘Chockstones’ collection. The chockstone collection is inspired by Higson’s love of climbing, and the natural process of what appears to be fragile elements, being strong and sturdy structures for anchoring. The chockstone collection consists of vessels, boxes, and sculptural pieces, all with similar deep cracks and carefully placed chockstones. All of Higson's work is constructed and formed in sterling silver, the chockstones are genuine cast stones. The whole piece is then oxidised to make black and brushed back to reveal the silver underneath, thus, giving each piece a muted tone. This use of muted tones is significant because these muted tones echo those of nature and the initial inspiration. The overarching inspiration for these pieces is solely due to Higson's love of climbing, a fascination with the strength of chockstones, and how nature has provided a seemingly fragile element in which Higson, as a climber, surrenders herself. When looking at 11
these artworks through a semiotic lens and digging deeper into the potential meanings, these chockstones can symbolise emotional, cultural, and personal interpretations.
Figure 4. Higson, 2021
It is essential to investigate the curation of these stones. Semiotically, the chockstones could represent the weight of grief and the personal resilience required in facing loss. The placement of each stone within the overall composition evokes the notion of balance, chaos, and order. Higson states, "Our most treasured moments – births and marriages, anniversaries, and accomplishments – stand out like rocks in the river of our lives, precious peaks that give shape and meaning to our time on earth." (Higson, 2023). This description relates to the emotions and sensations experienced during loss, echoing parts of the psyche during the grieving process. Higson's choice of cast silver chockstones carries connotations of endurance and strength while also being an iconic symbol. The rugged, weathered appearance of the stones also has a deeper interpretation, especially within the context of grief. She states, "The river of time is swift and relentless, and it is all too easy for those pivotal moments to be subsumed, leaving only faded photographs and hazy memories." (Higson, 2023). This aesthetic choice could be symbolic of the hard exterior used to mask our genuine
12
emotions during grief. The chockstone placement could represent the delicate balance of emotions in the face of grief or the interconnection of human experiences during the aftermath of loss. When looking at the chockstone's position within deep cracks in the main body of the pieces, they could also be a metaphor for the fragility of life—the feeling of being broken and unsure of self during and after the grieving process. “We seem as a species to be driven by a desire to make meanings: above all, we are surely homo significans – meaningmakers. Distinctively, we make meanings through our creation and interpretation of ‘signs’. Indeed, according to Peirce, ‘we think only in signs’ (Peirce 1931-58, 2.302).” (Chandler, 2007, p. 13). Often, in grief, there are feelings of being shattered or cracked, and often these cracks never completely heal. The emotional response to loss becomes accepted and easier to navigate, but the crack remains. The chockstones can then be considered anchor points within the broken self.
Figure 5. Higson, 2021
By scrutinising these semiotic elements, it is possible to uncover the intricate layers of meaning embedded in Higson's chockstone artworks, revealing a nuanced narrative that extends beyond the physicality of the materials. The use of chockstones as symbols carries emotional and personal meanings. The spatial arrangement of chockstones, the choice of materials, and viewer interaction are all elements that can contribute to the narrative of the works. By exploring these elements, one can uncover the intricate layers of meaning
13
embedded in Higson's chockstone artworks, thus revealing a nuanced narrative that extends beyond the physicality of the materials and speaks to the human experience of grief.
14
Chapter 4: An Analysis and Evaluation of Case Studies.
A questionnaire (see Appendix 1) was distributed among willing participants to investigate the therapeutic significance of objects in the aftermath of loss. The objective was to understand the pivotal role of these objects in the healing process, their integration into daily habits or rituals, the evolution of their significance throughout the grieving journey, and the sustenance of a relationship between the objects and the departed loved ones. Adamson states, "remembering through things is one of the most powerful forms of connection to materiality that we have as human beings." (Adamson, 2018, p. 119). The insights gathered from participants revealed the meaningful connections individuals forge with objects in the wake of loss, particularly those possessing a tangible connection to loved ones through gifting or direct association. Case Study E illustrates this phenomenon by integrating a clock into the main living space, symbolising the fragility and transience of life. The clock stands as a perpetual reminder, not necessarily triggering memories of the departed mother but as a poignant admonition against taking life and relationships for granted. Described as a "constant, constant," (Case E, 2023) the clock serves as a steadfast anchor, embodying the enduring presence of the mother alongside the individual. This object, passed down through generations, assumes the role of a cherished heirloom and transcends boundaries, showcasing the enduring legacy of the object across successive generations. As Case E eloquently says, "It would give me great comfort to know that my descendants will cherish the time machine. I am not the owner, just the current custodian." (Case E, 2023).
Figure 6. Clock, Case E, 2023
15
In Case F, the subject expresses a deep and raw grief in the early stages of bereavement. Adamson states, "We prize such an object not for its inherent worth, but for the way it connects us to something lost." (Adamson, 2018, p. 125). The case highlights how objects can hold significance beyond their inherent value and serve as a bridge to something lost. Despite finding comfort in familial bonds, a particular object, an Egyptian cotton sheet, holds significant meaning for the subject. They said, "I have since mum died, slept under her Egyptian cotton sheet" (Case F, 2023), emphasising the sheet's symbolic function. The sheet serves as a conduit for a more profound emotional need during the grieving journey, providing security and comfort. As the subject puts it, "I feel her strength around me under her sheet. Which in turn gives me strength. I have found on bad days, feeling like a lost child, I snuggle into it, like the safe arms of mum" (Case F, 2023). This utilisation of an object underscores an inherent desire to perpetuate the love and support unique to the maternal relationship, providing a means to navigate the void left by the departed. Unlike E's clock, which primarily serves as a material marker, Case F's narrative accentuates the tangible role of the object itself in alleviating the grieving individual. In the context of profound loss, embracing a familiar item, such as a sheet, emerges as a coping mechanism, offering a semblance of connection and support in the absence of the relationship that once provided solace. Utilising a specific object, like the Egyptian cotton sheet, assumes significance as a comforting aid, mitigating the disorienting and fearful dimensions of the grieving experience.
Figure 7. Ring. Case C, 2023
16
Cases C and D describe the phenomenon of connecting through jewellery after losing a loved one. The individuals in both cases note that the jewellery does not inherently remind them of the deceased; instead, it allows them to embody the character of the deceased, thereby granting them a heightened sense of self. For instance, Case D states “She was very independent, and I like to wear her ring to make myself feel more confident and embody her attitude.” (Case D, 2023). This process of embodiment through memory enables the wearer to experience a fuller sense of self. The connection to the jewellery may also function as a way for the bereaved to continue seeking support from their loved one through physical touch, as the ability to seek support from the person is no longer available. As Case C notes, the ring aids their emotional state through physical touch, helping them stay grounded and present in the moment. “I find the ring helps me while anxious, to turn it round on my finger brings me back into the moment and in a sense, back to reality. […] Meaning I feel more strength and confidence when alone in an anxious situation.” (Case C, 2023). The wearer interprets the essence of the loved one as being encapsulated in the object's body, allowing them to maintain a connection to the deceased and thereby increasing their capacity to feel strength and confidence, even in difficult situations. According to Betterton (1996), memories play a significant role in shaping the stories we tell about our lives. “We all return to memories […] the story we tell of our own life is reshaped around them” (Betterton, 1996, p. 172). In this sense, the connection to the jewellery can be seen as a means of reshaping the narrative of loss, allowing the bereaved to maintain a connection to their loved one and ultimately find solace through their character's physical and emotional embodiment. To conclude the case studies, there is clearly a sense of strength omitted through specific objects. This connection allows the bereaved a sense of strength and security and seem to act as an aid to the grieving process. The strength is gifted through an absorption of essence, memories, and continued connection, and seems, for some, to be an incredibly important part of the healing process.
17
Chapter 5: How does this information relate to my own practice and healing process after loss?
Figure 8. Strength and Fragility 2023
The impact that objects can have on individuals, particularly in the context of loss, has gathered significant attention in recent years. This topic has been crucial for me, as I have recently experienced a series of bereavements in rapid succession. This experience has prompted introspection regarding my coping mechanisms in times of grief, as well as how to navigate my children's first experiences with loss, both of which are complex undertakings. While clearing out a family member's home, I was struck by the seemingly random items significant for friends and family members. For instance, I was struck by the significance of a teddy bear to a woman in her 70s and a glass heart to a young girl of only 6. This observation led me to recognise the extent to which objects can hold tremendous importance in the context of remembering and celebrating the lives of loved ones, with all individuals and objects holding different levels of significance. As a result, I embarked on a journey to gain a deeper understanding of the psychological underpinnings of object attachment, the role that objects can play in personal recovery, and the continuation of relationships with loved ones. Through this process, I have come to appreciate the importance of objects in grieving and recovery. As Terdiman notes, "to remember is always to be separated," (Terdiman, 1993, p. 136) highlighting the role that remembering and memorialising loved ones can play in healing after loss. This process has been challenging and rewarding as I have sought to create a work
18
that embodies the complex emotions and delicate navigation of loss. The piece in question acts not as a sentimental tribute or a memorial to the deceased but rather as a reflection of the process of attaining wellness following a loss. I aimed to create a work that captures the emotional turmoil that often accompanies grief, serving as a metaphor for the journey that individuals must embark on during such trying times. The aim is that this body of work allows the wearer and myself the maker to “activate our memories to inform our understanding and sense of self” (Landsberg, 2022, p. 71).
Figure 9. Strength and Fragility, 2023
Figure 10. Strength and Fragility, 2023
I intended to convey the aesthetic of strength while simultaneously highlighting the fragility and vulnerability typically present in the aftermath of a loss. The piece consists of a ring, brooch, and necklace that can become interlocked to form a solid cube, symbolising the strength needed to cope with grief. Each piece features a visible crack, representing the fragility felt during the grieving process and a reminder that the loss will always remain. The set diamond within each crack is representative of the physicality of the lost. The cube of interlocked pieces sits on a plinth and is held in place by a totemic key that serves to open and close each piece for wear. I intended to create a piece that could be worn in its separate and interlocked states, making it adaptable to the prevailing grief state. The piece's tactile nature further enhances the connection to one's journey of remembrance. This piece acts to “Give yourself an eternally beautiful way to treasure your memories” (Higson, 2023) while having a physical object to touch and connect with. I hope is that like the clock in Case E this piece will mark a response of grounding and appreciation of the life and time we all still have,
19
while having a positive impact on myself and the wearer of the accomplishment we have undergone through the grieving process.
Figure 11. Strength and Fragility, 2023
20
Conclusion.
This paper has only begun to scratch the surface of the complex topic of using objects to aid the journey toward wholeness after experiencing the extreme emotional turmoil of grief. However, through my grieving process and research, it has become apparent that creating and utilising objects has been a vital aspect of my healing journey. This research has allowed me to feel safe and supported during my healing process and has highlighted the importance of taking the necessary time to grieve and process the loss of a loved one. Through an exploration of lived experiences and an analysis of various attachment theories, I have concluded that developing a relationship with objects can have a profoundly positive impact on those who are grieving. These objects can serve as a means of immortalising the deceased and maintaining a connection with them while also allowing the mourner to better understand themselves and their own emotions. Furthermore, using these objects can provide strength and comfort during difficult times. The research has demonstrated that these objects can allow the wearer to embody the essence of the deceased, providing a stronger sense of self and a deeper understanding of personal identity. The psychological attachments formed through the use of these objects provide a continued relationship with the deceased, allowing emotions of both strength and fragility to be experienced. Overall, this paper establishes the efficacy of using objects to facilitate the journey toward wholeness after experiencing grief. Creating and utilising objects can provide comfort, support, and connection during a challenging time, ultimately contributing to healing.
21
Reference List.
Adamson, G. (2018). Fewer Better Things. Pg. 119, 120, 125. New York: Bloomsbury Publishing. Ayling-Smith, B. (2016). The Space Between Mourning and Melancholia: The Use of Cloth in Contemporary Art Practice to Materialise the Work of Mourning. Brighton: University for the Creative Arts, Farnham. Betterton, R. (1996). An Intimate Distance: Women Artists and the Body. Pg. 172. London: Routledge. Chandler, D. (2007). Semiotics - The Basics. Oxon. Pg. 13. Routledge. Cruse. (2023). Understanding the Five Stages of Grief. [Online] Available at: https://www.cruse.org.uk/understanding-grief/effects-of-grief/five-stages-ofgrief/#:~:text=The%20five%20stages%20– %20denial%2C%20anger,isn%27t%20often%20the%20case [Accessed November 2023]. Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1993). Why we Need Things. In: History from Things. Pg. 22. Smithsonian Institution. Freud, S. (1914-1916). On the History of the Psycho-Analytic Movement. London: The Hogarth Press. Hayes, A. (2022). Consumerism Explained: Definition, Economic Impact, Pros & Cons. [Online] Available at: https://www.investopedia.com/terms/c/consumerism.asp [Accessed December 2023]. Higson, R. (2023). Rauni Higson. [Online] Available at: https://www.raunihigson.co.uk Landsberg, L. D. (2022). Illusive Objects: An Investigation into the Embodiment of Memory through Contemporary Jewellery. Pg 71. April. McCalman, J. (2001). About Face: Recognising the Self and The Family Through Grieving. February. P R Silverman, D. K. &. S. L. N. (1996). Continuing Bonds: New Understanding of Grief. Washington DC: Taylor and Francis. Parkes, C. (1986). Studies of Grief in Adult Life. Pg. 160. UK: Pelican Books. Slater, D. (1997). Consumer Culture and Modernity. Pg 27, 133. Cambridge: Polity Press.
22
Spikins, T. B. &. P. (2018). The Object of my affection: Attachment security and material culture. Pg. 26 [Online] Available at: https://doi.org/10.1080/1751696X.2018.1433355 [Accessed July 2023]. Terdiman, R. (1997). Present, Past, Modernity and the Memory Crisis. Pg 136, 300. Ithaca, New York: Cornell University Press, Sage House 512, East State Street, Ithaca, New York 14850.
23
Bibliography.
Adamson, G. (2018). Fewer Better Things. New York: Bloomsbury Publishing. Ahde-Deal, P. (2013). Women and Jewellery. Helsinki: Aalto University. Ayling-Smith, B. (2016). The Space Between Mourning and Melancholia: The Use of Cloth in Contemporary Art Practice to Materialise the Work of Mourning. Brighton: University for the Creative Arts, Farnham. Betterton, R. (1996). An Intimate Distance: Women Artists and the Body. London: Routledge. Bohnert, H. G. (1950). Philosophical Studies. Pg. 172. June. Volume 1, no. 4. Brody, J. E. (2018). Bereavement and Grief. Chandler, D. (2007). Semiotics - The Basics. Oxon. Pg. 13. Routledge. Crawford, M. (2009). The Case For Working With Your Hands, Or Why Office Work Is Bad For Us And Fixing Things Feels Good. London: Penguin. Cruse. (2023). Understanding the Five Stages of Grief. [Online] Available at: https://www.cruse.org.uk/understanding-grief/effects-of-grief/five-stages-ofgrief/#:~:text=The%20five%20stages%20– %20denial%2C%20anger,isn%27t%20often%20the%20case [Accessed November 2023]. Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1993). Why we Need Things. In: History from Things. Smithsonian Institution. Daniel Orth, C. T. E. v. d. H. (2018). Designing objects with Meaningful Associations. Dissanayake, E. (2000). Art and Intimacy. Washington: University of Washington Press. Freud, S. (1914-1916). On the History of the Psycho-Analytic Movement. London: The Hogarth Press. Gary Davies, S. W. A. F. &. M. W. (2010). Gifts and Gifting. Gifts and Gifting, Volume 12, 413434. Harman, G. (2020). Art and Objects. Cambridge: Polity Press. Hayes, A. (2022). Consumerism Explained: Definition, Economic Impact, Pros & Cons. [Online] Available at: https://www.investopedia.com/terms/c/consumerism.asp [Accessed December 2023]. Higson, R. (2023). Rauni Higson. [Online] Available at: https://www.raunihigson.co.uk Hockey, E. H. a. J. (2001). Death, Memory and Material Culture. Oxford: Berg.
24
Keefer, L. A. (2011). Attachment to Objects as a Compensatory Strategy. Landsberg, L. D. (2022). Illusive Objects: An Investigation into the embodiment of Memory through Contemporary Jewellery. April. Larson, J. D. J. a. S. E. (2002). Signs In Use. London & New York: Routledge. Mauss, M. (2002). The Gift. Oxon: Routledge. McCalman, J. (2001). About Face: Recognising the Self and The Family Through Grieving. February. McCoy, B. (2021). How Your Brain Copes with Grief, and Why It Takes Time to Heal. Miller, D. (2009). The Comfort of Things. Cambridge: Polity Press. Miller, D. (2010). Stuff. Cambridge: Polity Press. Minna Huotilainen, C. G. M. R. P. S.-h. (2018). Why our brains love and craft. [Online] Available at: https://researchgate.net/publication/328337756 O'Brien, A. M. &. S. (2014). Love Objects. London: Bloomsbury Academic. P R Silverman, D. K. &. S. L. N. (1996). Continuing Bonds: New Understanding of Grief. Washington DC: Taylor and Francis. Parkes, C. (1986). Studies of Grief in Adult Life. UK: Pelican Books. Parsons, L. (2008). Thompson's Rubbish Theory: Exploring the Practice of Value Creation. [Online] Available at: http://acrwebsite.org/volumes/13952/eacr/vol8/E-08 Pitcher, S. (2022). Tactile Interactions - How Is Touch Important To Understanding, Making and Wearing Jewellery. Tactile Interactions - How Is Touch Important To Understanding, Making and Wearing Jewellery, February. Questionnaire (2023). Schick, K. (2011). Acting Out and Working Through: Trauma and (In) Security. Acting Out and Working Through: Trauma and (In) Security, October. Volume 37. Slater, D. (1997). Consumer Culture and Modernity. Cambridge: Polity Press. Smith, G. E. N. &. R. K. (2016). The need to belong motivates demand for authentic objects. The need to belong motivates demand for authentic objects. Spikins, T. B. &. P. (2018). The Object of my affection: Attachment security and material culture. [Online] Available at: https://doi.org/10.1080/1751696X.2018.1433355 [Accessed July 2023]. Tavory, C. J. &. I. (2014). Molds, Totems: Non Humans and the Constitution of the Social Self. Molds, Totems: Non Humans and the Constitution of the Social Self, Volume 32. 25
Terdiman, R. (1997). Present, Past, Modernity and the Memory Crisis. Ithaca, New York: Cornell University Press, Sage House 512, East State Street, Ithaca, New York 14850. Wixom, D. (2012). Cultural Expressions of Grief Through Art. Cultural Expressions of Grief Through Art.
26
Appendix 1.
Questionnaire The present questionnaire is intended for research purposes pertaining to the dissertation of the researcher. All information provided by the respondents shall be kept confidential and anonymous. By agreeing to complete the questionnaire, participants consent to the use of their responses in an academic paper. Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Can you describe the significance of the object? Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? Can you provide an image of the object?
27
Appendix 2.
Case A. Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? The first memory I have of someone close to me dying was my nan, or nanny as we called her. She lived with us, and I don’t remember her not ever living in our house, I found it odd that my friends didn’t have their grandparents living with them. I was 14 when she died. I remember the funeral being a celebration and lots of happy songs because that’s what she wanted, and we had complete faith she was somewhere far better, and we’d see her again. I always remember how she would let me lie across her lap and scratch my back with her strong old nails and I could lie there forever! She tried to teach me to knit. She showed me how to put curls of wool on my soft doll toy. I always remember on Tuesdays she would collect her pension and if she picked us up from school we would go to the sweet shop and spend 50p. I felt her absence keenly at the time... It was very strange and hard not seeing her place at the table. Time has helped and having my own children and my mum being a grandma. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Anything creative, when I knit, I think of her! Can you describe the significance of the object? The act of knitting reminds me of the times she tried to teach me and the awful unfinished scarves I attempted! Can you provide an image of the object? Any knitting needles Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? It has become comforting instead of painful. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? No. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? I would say that I don’t knit daily but seasonally – when I start to feel overwhelmed or too stressed, I use it to go to a calm place. 28
Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Yes, in a positive way for sure. Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Yes, knitting reminds me of my nan and the act of knitting is soothing. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? No Can you provide an image of the object?
29
Case B Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? Over the summer my Granchi passed away after a long battle with terminal pancreatic cancer. Throughout my adult life I have spent less time with my Granchi but I would see him at least once a week generally as he would always visit for Sunday roast. He was a very important person in my life as I grew up living a few doors away and would spend most of my time there with him and my nanna. He would walk to school with me, taught me to swim and looked after me most weekends too. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? There are a few objects that remind me and have supported me through the grieving process which include a couple of paintings taken from their front room, but the main items are a pack of cards and dominoes which are from the set that I used to play with my nanna and Granchi when I was a boy. Can you describe the significance of the object. The items have great significance to me as they take me back to memories of being a young boy and learning to play blackjack and solitaire among other card games with my nanna and dominoes with my Granchi too. We would sit around the circular kitchen table after dinner to play cards and dominoes while chatting away. Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? I think that the symbolic meaning has changed over the period of grief. I feel at first, upon finding these old cards and dominoes it brought sadness more so even though I had quite some time to come to terms that my Granchi was going to die. They brought back sadness of my nanna too who passed away over 20 years ago, as it reminded me of special times that we had all spent together. However, now I feel that with them I can look back upon happy times which in turn I feel happy to have had such wonderful grandparents who have spent this time with me over the years. Some are not so lucky, and I feel warmer knowing this having them with me. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? I most certainly feel that these items now provide me with strength to remember them for the great people that I have had in my life. But also, on the other hand I am very protective over these items, and I feel ever so fragile when someone touches even the tin that they are in. I feel tremendously protective of them. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines?
30
I have started playing more card games with my daughter since I have inherited them. Although we do not use these yet as they are too precious to use with my daughter, but I hope that one day we can use the to play together. Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Other than making me feel warm and content when I see them, I don’t feel they have much more of an impact otherwise. Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? I do not seek support or comfort from them at present. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? I think I have probably covered my feelings and experiences.
Can you provide an image of the object?
31
Case C
Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? Bereavement affected my life in different ways; used to affect me every day, not knowing what to do with the grief or how to handle my emotions. Now, it affects me in a sense of guilt, forgetting the passing of a loved one and carrying on with life, to then feel guilty about no longer sharing experiences with them. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Yes. Can you describe the significance of the object. It’s a ring that used to be worn by my nan frequently. To wear it myself makes me feel close to her. Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? Looking at the ring used to give me a sense of sadness, now I look at it and see many memories with my nan. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? I find the ring helps me while anxious, to turn it round on my finger brings me back into the moment and in a sense, back to reality. Meaning I feel more strength and confidence when alone in an anxious situation. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? It feels like there’s something missing when I don’t wear it. Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? It has affected my well-being in a positive manner, to put it on every day is as part of my daily routine as brushing my teeth. Once on, I feel ready for a positive and happy day. Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Not in a specific situation but it gives me comfort in my everyday life, knowing that my nan is still close. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? 32
N/A Can you provide an image of the object?
33
Case D Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? I lost both my grandparents within 2 months of each other after two years of them being ill with dementia and cancer. It was an incredibly hard couple of years that involved a lot of sacrifice and emotions. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Can you describe the significance of the object. I have a gold tigers-eye ring that was my grandmothers, I wore it constantly after she passed. Now I wear it less often but make sure to wear it during big events as it brings me comfort thinking she is there. I also have a small spanner about 50mm long that was my grandfathers. I keep it safe in a box but would like to turn it into a necklace so I can keep it close to me. Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? To start it was about remembering them, now it’s more about feeling like they are still with me. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? I feel a bit stronger when I am wearing my grandmothers ring. She was very independent, and I like to wear her ring to make myself feel more confident and embody her attitude. When I am struggling with missing her, which still happens even though it’s been 5 years, I wear the ring to feel like she is still here and present. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? As I said before wearing the ring makes me feel more confident and helps me to embody the way my grandmother was. I used to wear the ring daily to keep them close to me. I don’t know as I don’t want to damage it at work, but I always wear it to big events. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? No. Can you provide an image of the object?
34
Case E Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? My bereavement is regarding my mother Diane, who died of cancer aged 49. As a 25-yearold man her death had a major impact on my life. Although expected, her death was a huge shock. It totally changed my perception of life and made me realise just how short life can be. I changed from an irresponsible uncaring lad into a responsible caring adult. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Can you describe the significance of the object. I find great comfort in my mother’s clock. It was passed down to my mother from her Great uncle. It has seen generations of my family born and pass. It is in fact a time machine! Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? The symbolic meaning hasn’t changed; however, its relevance just gets stronger as time slips by. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? The clock evokes feelings of both strength and fragility. A reminder of how fragile and passing life is, the clock forever ticking, time forever passing. Also, a reminder of how life goes on, ups and downs, if you have the energy, you can keep going. Wind the clock and it will keep going. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? The clock is a big part of my everyday life. It’s there on the mantle in my living room. A constant, constant. Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Yes, it is emotionally comforting to me. The tick tock is incredibly relaxing. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? I hope the clock remains cared for and most importantly used in my family. It would give me great comfort to know that my own descendants will cherish the time machine. I am not the owner, just the current custodian.
35
Can you provide an image of the object?
36
Case F Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? My mum died recently of cancer my father died 24 years ago. I am an only child, lay with her as she died, organised her funeral and closed her house (for which I kept apologising for ‘messing with mums’ private stuff’). Impact – Obviously lost! Empty. Overwhelmed at everything that had to be done. A need to show strength to my family, mainly so they would not worry about me. A desperate need to do mum right in all decisions I was making. Afraid of the responsibility now on my shoulders as the matriarch. I also felt protective of my family. All of these feelings caused great difficulty in sleeping, which heightened the emotions. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Can you describe the significance of the object. I have found solace in my family and in moments more than objects. However, I have since mum died, I have slept under her Egyptian cotton sheet. This object makes me feel closer to mum. It is soft against my skin, and it makes me feel like my mothers arms are still around me; comforting me and keeping me warm. Still mothering me if you like. Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? Obviously, these sheets had little significance to me while mum was alive, other than to tease her about being posh or a sheet snob. The nurses joked between themselves about mums’ lovely sheets. They have become a representation of parts of mums’ character as well as her essence. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? I feel her strength around me under her sheet. Which in turn gives me strength. I have found on bad days, feeling like a lost child, I snuggle into it, like the safe arms of mum. The object itself isn’t the comfort, it’s the essence of everything she was to me. The sheets never make me sad, it evokes only comfort, although I never go under them in the day, no matter how upset I am. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Integrated every night. But no change of habit or routine. I think it has been important to my wellbeing because, every night, she still mothers me; like when I was a baby, I feel swaddled and safe. Physically safe, but also emotionally safe, knowing that she was mu example of how to be a good human and live a good life.
37
I do not seek solace at specific times from this object, or any other object. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? What has surprised me most is not being able to identify what the ‘triggers’ might be. The obvious ones: closing her house for the last time, birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas – empty seat at the table, these are all expected. Wasn’t expecting to get upset about Blinis in the freezer. A random Capri car in the street. Her sewing basket…I hate sewing! Can you provide an image of the object?
38
Case G Can you briefly share your bereavement and how it has impacted your life? My bereavement is in regards to my father who died 5 years ago, age 68 of lung cancer; I was 28 when it happened and it destroyed my world. Having a conflicting relationship with him meant my grief was delayed, this resulted in a considerable amount of time living with no hope and a complete loss of self and at age 30. I had a complete breakdown. Over the following 2 years, through the power of incredible friends not giving up on me, I finally began to find pieces of myself again and begin to heal myself on my journey with grief. The impact it has had on my life has been profound. It changed who I am as a person and my ability to be fully present with those I love. It has taught me to never take anyone for granted, to never wait to be happy and find joy in even the smallest of places. Ultimately, I discovered grief is the love you have for that person with nowhere for it to go and you live and breathe it every day for the rest of your life-there’s something beautiful in that. Have you found solace or support through a specific object during your grieving process? Can you describe the significance of the object. Yes, definitely…. I have a white, ceramic watch that my father bought for me when I was 20. I have always loved this object. Having lost 90% of my sentimental belonging by age 19, It instantly became a part of me respective of the relationship between me and my father especially being something I wore daily. I didn’t recognise the significance of my watch breaking until after my father had passed. It broke while I was on holiday with my daughter and then partner, the day before he told me he was ill. I was sat on the beach and happened to notice the dial looked odd, I went to tighten it and the insides came shooting out on to my lap, I managed to catch all the pieces and put them back together enough to put them securely back into the piece for safe keeping. It stopped on 1.45, the same time I discovered my fathers fate the following day. Despite it breaking, I still wore/wear it most days. It became significant in a universal way that this is how it played out for me- that our relationship was out of time in this world. My watch has taken on new significance since my father passed. His passing alone has altered the depth of the sentimentality I share with this object. The adventure he told me he went on to find it always rings in my ears when I spend a moment being present with it, always brings a smile to my face as I merely asked for a white watch….he took it to the extreme and found me not only a white watch but one made from ceramic(?), this in turn makes me laugh as it just brings back lovely memories of him, it reminds me to have fun in everything we do like he did and to be bold irrespective of the norm. I have yet to get my watch fixed, it is a nightmare finding someone who will even touch it due to its material (something that again makes me smile as it reminds me of funny convos had with my father surrounding my watch) and since his passing I no longer feel I would be able to hand it over to a stranger to have it fixed. The risk physically that it may come back tarnished or just not right in some way, upsets my ability to allow that vulnerability yet. I was always intent on having it fixed, however I now strangely feel like it has served its purpose in my life as a functioning object and serves now to be a reminder of the lessons within life I have learnt and are continually learning on my lifetime journey with grief. It
39
always reminds me of my father and brings me a familiar comfort when worn. It’s one of the few things in life that makes me feels safe. Has the symbolic meaning of this object changed over time/during the onset of your grief? If yes, how? Yes, as above. Has this object evoked emotions of strength or fragility? If so, how have these emotional responses contributed to your overall coping strategies? My watch has evoked strength and fragility at varying points throughout my journey with grief so far. It reminds me to have the strength to go through life open to experience and full of love, to wake up every day grateful to have more time in this world, time is precious, my grief has taught me that it is the most powerful thing you can give someone because you can never get it back. Again, realising this is love. The strength it empowers me with, always feels mirrored in and balanced by the fragility felt within grief, the deep sadness we endure from the loss of our person, the emptiness found within the loss of self, the impending clock over all of our heads, our own mortality and our forced dance with this eventuality to our lives. I struggled for years to be able to feel what I needed to, to grieve the loss of my father. I was tortured by memories and couldn’t function even on a basic level. I felt fragility every second, of every minute, of every day. It was hell on earth. When I finally started to heal, I began wearing my watch more often, I found myself holding it with my hand as a security initially, it made me feel more me. This then turned into a comfort before finally becoming a strength. My watch has been with me for most of my adult life, it has gone through everything I have, it broke, just like I did, but just like me, despite being broken, it still exists, and still continues to be the unique object that it is. I use my watch as a constant reminder to have the strength to move through time with love and that everything happens for a reason, even if you don’t see or know it yet. My watch helped me to open up to the vulnerability/fragility I was stuck in with my grief by supporting me quietly every day physically to leave my safe space and take the steps I needed to become whole again. I carry it on my wrist almost as a symbol of my grief, proud that I’m still here and able to do so. Grief is lonely, it is one of the loneliest parts of being human, wearing my watch eases my relationship with grief, it gives me perspective and on the days I struggle, I put it on instinctively so I can stand between the emotions of strength and fragility and walk the line we call life. In what ways, if any, has this object been integrated into your daily habits or routines? Would you say this object has an impact on your emotional wellbeing? Do you seek support or comfort from this object during specific situations, and if so, how? Yes, as above. Is there anything else you would like to share about your experience with this object or your grief? No.
40
Can you provide an image of the object?
41
List of Illustrations.
Figure 1. Hale, Errol. The Grief Wheel. Available at https://gbcmpk.org/navigating-the-griefwheel. Accessed 2023. Figure 2. Patel, Neil. The Buying Cycle. Available at https://neilpatel.com/blog/optimizebuying-cycle/. Accessed 2023. Figure 3. Nielson, W. Pierce’s Triadic Model of a Semiotic System. Available at https://www.researchgate.net/figure/Peirces-Triadic-Model-of-a-SemioticSystem_fig5_228368369. Accessed 2023. Figure 4. Higson, Rauni. 2021. Chockstones. Available at https://www.raunihigson.co.uk. Accessed 2023. Figure 5. Higson, Rauni. 2021. Chockstones. Available at https://www.raunihigson.co.uk. Accessed 2023. Figure 6. Case Study E, Appendix 2. 2023 Figure 7. Case Study C, Appendix 2. 2023 Figure 8. Kondal, Jade. Strength and Fragility. 2023 Figure 9. Kondal, Jade. Strength and Fragility. 2023 Figure 10. Kondal, Jade. Strength and Fragility. 2023 Figure 11. Kondal, Jade. Strength and Fragility. 2023
42
43