HEELS FALL 2019
B. Classy Styling By Brendan Classy Interior Living
Jason Fredericks
I HAVE A POWERFUL TESTIMONY
GLOBAL MAGAZINE
Photo by cottonbro from Pexels
The second Mother’s Day without my mom, I felt no tinge of sadness. I was still a mother so I chose to celebrate that. I wanted to also celebrate all of those aunts, godmothers and friends of my mom’s that have looked out for me since her passing. I had every intention on stopping by Target one afternoon to purchase a few Mother’s Day cards to mail. I walked into Target that day feeling absolutely good. I ran out of Target that day hiding the flood of tears from my nephew who was trying to keep up with my fast pace. I bought no cards. I may have read three cards before my heart gave in to the reality that the last Mother’s Day card and gift I bought was for MY mother, and I’d never be able to do that again and neither would this eleven year old boy behind me. For some reason, when I was in the card aisle that day, I tried to push through and read a few more cards after those initial three. For a moment that day I tried to make myself do something that was virtually impossible for me to do. And that was damaging to my psyche for the weeks that followed.
The truth is, there is no universal right answer. This is the time where you inventory YOUR feelings and know YOUR limits. The holidays are too fragile a time for you to ignore your emotions. Not everyone will understand that. And that’s when we make the awful mistake of doing the holidays for everyone else and not ourselves. And that’s when we risk ruining the celebrating for everyone because we forced our feelings to the back burner. When the holidays come and you start to feel much less than your best. Do what will bring you healing. If sitting in your grief will help you sort out the pain and bring healing to you, do it. If refusing to give in to sadness is more your path, then do that. We are the ones that are left behind to find our way...our new purpose. I believe we will find that in listening to ourselves and knowing when enough is enough and too much is too much. We should all start to create a world that is sympathetic and understands those concepts. In this season that may remind us of our loss, may we all find the hope to carry on, in our own way and in our own time.
~Brittny Ruth
wishing you the best holiday season ever.
HEELS GLOBAL MAGAZINE