2018 Nov Eagle Eye

HAWAII BAPTIST ACADEMY

VOL 33, NO 1 NOV 2018

Are you being overparented? → By Kristin Lau (‘19)

EDITORIAL

Cover Graphic

By Daniel Jurek (‘20)

EAGLE EYE Hawaii Baptist Academy 2429 Pali Highway Honolulu, Hawaii 96817

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Hawaii Baptist Academy’s Eagle Eye is a student-run and studentcentered publication.

Have your parents ever helped you with a school project?

Ever had your dad drop off a forgotten assignment to school?

Are your parents still doing your laundry?

In a parenting book entitled “How to Raise an Adult,” author Julie Lythcott-Haim asserts that children today are subject to overparenting more than ever. When she was the dean of freshmen at Stanford University, Lythcott-Haim was alarmed at how parents continued to do everything for their college-age children, including writing to professors about grades or doing their laundry.

However, parenting isn’t the only thing that’s changed drastically over the past few decades. Applying to college has also become much more competitive and pushes many students to their breaking points. Now that I’m a senior, the pressure not only to get into highly acclaimed schools but also to get loads of scholarships haunts me every day. Stressed out about finding that special something that’ll give me that extra edge in applications, I (along with many of my peers) pack on a hectic schedule full of AP classes, sports, and time-consuming extracurriculars and clubs.

Without a doubt, a good college education can make a big difference to people’s futures. The problem is that parents are now more driven to go to extreme lengths to “help” their children get into a good school. They prefer their children to focus on things that can be featured on their college applications than learning practical life skills. At HBA, I’ve heard from countless students about how their parents reward them with extravagant gifts or cash for obtaining all A’s on their report cards. I’ve known students whose parents force them to join certain sports or take specific AP classes, thinking that it will help improve their children’s transcripts. Rather than allowing their children to learn decision-making skills or to discover their passions and interests, many parents are overdirecting their children’s lives by taking away their freedom to make choices for themselves.

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Submissions The Eagle Eye encourages students, teachers, and staff to submit letters, essays, opinion columns, and artwork on current school and social issues. They must be signed by the author. Letters may be edited, but care will be taken to maintain the writer’s point. Please submit material to room 300B. Opinions expressed in letters and columns are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Hawaii Baptist Academy or the Eagle Eye staff.

Advertising Businesses may place ads in the Eagle Eye on a space available basis and for a reasonable fee. Please call the school for more information at 595-6301.

Distribution The Eagle Eye is distributed at no charge to the Hawaii Baptist Academy middle and high school students, faculty, and staff. Mail subscriptions are available for a fee.

Banana Splits Comes to High School CARE GROUP FOR STUDENTS FROM SINGLE PARENT HOMES TO BEGIN IN JANUARY → By Zadie Young (‘22)

NEWS

Starting in the second semester, a new club will be starting at the high school called Banana Splits.

PHOTOGRAPH BY ZADIE YOUNG (‘22)

EAGLE EYE TEAM EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Kristin Lau (‘19) STAFF Jarin Ashimine (‘20) TJ Halemano-Reed (‘20) Jayni Ishikawa (‘19) Daniel Jurek (‘21) Marcus Mau (‘19) Kasandra Miao (‘19) Lance Tasaka (‘20) Zadie Young (‘21) Advisor Eunice Sim

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Banana Splits is a support group for students who come from single-parent homes as a result of divorce, death, or other circumstances. Meetings will take place on two Thursdays a month during Z-periods. While this is new to the high school, Banana Splits has been at the elementary school for years, led by elementary school counselor Patricia Murphy.

Senior Marcus Mau, who attended this group in elementary school, decided to bring this group to the high school because it helped him immensely through his parents’ divorce in 2008 when he was just a fifth grader. “As an elementary kid, it helped to know I wasn’t alone and that there were other people who knew all the stuff I was going through,” said Mau. He believes that the club will help other kids who are struggling with similar situations benefit from having school support, especially if they don’t have support at home.

According to club advisor and high school counselor Tara Gruspe, the objective of this group is to be a “safe place for students to be able to feel supported and where [people] can empathize with others in similar situations.” Mau thinks that the group has a lot of potential but recognizes that it may be hard for students to let their walls down and be vulnerable. He believes, however, that by recognizing challenges that may have been faced in the past, people will be able to mend some of the damage that has been done by talking with a community of people who have experienced the same situations.

Like the elementary school Banana Splits, the high school group aims to foster a sense of community and create a space for students to have fun together in spite of hard circumstances. Also, everyone will be able to get to know each other and hopefully make new friends. Mau states, “I made a lot of good friends from the group that has always been really close to me, [including] one of my best friends. He’s been there for me through everything.” Meetings will also consist of talking about specific topics, giving updates, and talking about more serious issues that may not have been covered in fifth or sixth grade For students who are interested in attending, meetings will start during the second semester. For more information see either Mrs. Gruspe or senior Marcus Mau. Mau encourages students to check the group out even if they feel hesitant. Snacks will be served.

Starting in January, Banana Splits will begin meeting twice a month on Thursdays during Z period.

Gotta Catch ‘Em All 3

ANIME WINS FANS AROUND THE WORLD

→ By Lance Tasaka (‘20)

Whether or not you’re an anime fan, you’ll probably be able to identify the Japanese anime series Pokémon. It is known for its cute and animated creatures, the most famous being the chubby yellow mouse, Pikachu.

In recent times, anime and manga—Japanese-made animation and comics— have crossed over into American mainstream media and culture. The Pokémon media franchise is currently the highest grossing media franchise in the world according to Wikipedia, ranking above Star Wars, Mickey Mouse and other American animation and comic juggernauts.

It was in the 1990’s and the early 2000’s that Japanese anime started flooding the U.S. market. Pokémon began as a Nintendo Game Boy monster catching game and then grew in popularity when it was developed into an anime TV series.

Sophomore Daniel Jurek, like many of his peers, remembers growing up watching the anime series. “Best show overall,” he said, “because I watched the show frequently as a child, and I know that it is my favorite overall because I can’t watch the first episode without crying.” Jurek was just three years old when he watched his first anime show. “Ever since then, the genre just stuck with me because I genuinely loved it,” he said.

The first Japanese animated films were made around a century ago. In the 1970’s, anime became mainstream in Japan as animators developed a new genre called “mecha”, distinguished by giant robots and other mechanical characters. The success of the first Star Wars movie in 1977 was felt in Japan and Japanese animation began to explore the space opera genre.

FEATURE

In 1978, the Gundam Series rose out of the “mecha” world and gained international popularity. It would be one of the first anime shows to be translated into English and to air in the U.S. Forty years later, the series is still going strong and has become an icon of the “mecha” and anime genres. In Odaiba, Tokyo, a life-size Gundam robot was built in 2009 commemorating the 30th anniversary of the series. A new robot—standing almost 70 feet tall—has since replaced the 2009 version.

Alongside the rise of Gundam, the anime sports genre began to take shape. The Captain Tsubasa soccer series, one of the best-selling manga series of all time, was released in 1981 and continues to be published today. Today, you can find manga featuring all kinds of sports, from basketball, swimming, tennis, to even quiz bowls.

Another manga series that gained popularity outside of Japan is Dragon Ball. It introduced the martial arts style to anime and the Dragon Ball Z anime TV series became a hit show on America’s Cartoon Network. The martial arts anime and manga genre would also produce international hits like Naruto and One Piece.

Fans of the Naruto series who grew up watching the show have a special connection with it as the main character begins as a child seeking recognition in the world. Senior Jayni Ishikawa was first introduced to Naruto on Disney XD. “My sister and I were interested and watched it. We thought it was cool,” she said. The show turned her toward manga and she is now an avid manga reader.

But what really brought anime to the world was the 1988 animated dystopian film Akira. It grossed US$49 million worldwide and many film critics believe it is one of the most influential

Anime shows are available in both English and Japanese but fans differ on whether or not English versions fully capture the original feel of the shows. Language department chair Elena Yoo, another proud otaku, said, “It must be in Japanese. You won’t get the full humor or little nuances unless you watch them in Japanese. Besides, you have to enjoy the weird anime voice actors’ high pitch, nasally voices to truly appreciate the experience.”

Like many otakus, Miyasato recognizes that her love for anime and manga can be considered obsessive. She explained, “I am very addicted to anime and I have a lot of anime merch in my room. However ever since high school, I have gotten less and less time to watch anime because of my busy schedule.” Matsuda added, “I’ve read over 300 manga, so I’m extremely addicted? But I don’t often talk about anime and manga because most people don’t read the shoujos (story of girl main character) I like.”

Yoo also admits to the addictive nature of anime. “I am a controlled addict meaning I can binge watch anime for hours, but I know when to stop since I have work to do! Nowadays, I can only become ‘addicted’ during the summer.”

For those interested in checking out anime, HBA otaku fans have some advice to share. To start, Jurek recommends watching Sword Art Online (SAO), Fairytail, Your Lie in April and My Hero Academia. Junior Ryder Watanabe recommends the shows Tokyo Ghoul, Guilty Crown, and The Seraph of the End. Another place to look is the website MyAnimeList.net. The site has reviews and news on many different shows.

Illustrations by Daniel Jurek (‘21). Photograph of Gundam robot in Tokyo by Lance Tasaka (‘20).

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animated movies of all time. In 1995, anime film Ghost in the Shell was released and later became the inspiration for The Matrix. Then in 2002, Studio Ghibli released their anime film Spirited Away, which won the Best Animated Feature award at the 2003 Academy Awards. It was the first foreign language animated film to win the award.

Anime and manga fans­—known as “otaku” in Japan—are nothing short of passionate. They also take pride in being very opinionated about the variety of franchises in the genre. At HBA, there are a number of closet otakus, many of whom are hesitant to identify themselves because of negative connotations associated with anime fandom.

“There is nothing to be gained by admitting I am a fan; only negative backlash to be had,” an anonymous student said. Like other closet otakus, this fan didn’t want to be seen as a “nerd” or “weirdo”.

Jurek, on the other hand, doesn’t mind being pigeonholed and is a proud otaku. “I enjoy the unbelievably smooth animation like that of Boku no Hero Academia, the characters, plot, art, and most importantly, the ‘osts’ (original soundtrack). Anime serves as an outlet for me.

Anime has a life to it that other modern cartoons lack, and it proves to be better than common favorites of the era, like everything on Cartoon Network at the moment.”

Since the age of eight, junior Jessica Matsuda has been watching anime. “I love anime! Well, actually I mainly read manga... I just love how mangakas (Manga authors) put so much effort into developing their characters. I’ve even grown ‘connections’ with some of the characters and their stories. Even simple one-shots have such wonderful storylines.”

Another passionate fan, junior Jessica Miyasato, has been been watching anime since fifth grade. “I feel a connection to some of the anime plots because they are so relatable, like how a character in the anime enters into a new school and has to make new friends, which was me in the fourth grade,” said Miyasato.

The Not-So-Sweet Truth About Sugar → By Kasandra Miao (‘19)

FEATURE

Sugar is a necessary substance for our daily diet, but it can also be detrimental to our health if we aren’t paying attention to how much and what kind of sugar we consume.

While the American Heart Association’s recommended sugar amount is 25-38 grams a day, the average American actually consumes up to 82 grams of sugar in a day. According to statista.com, a survey done in the U.S. from 2009-2018 shows that the total amount of sugar consumption in the United States increased from 9.9 million metric tons in 2009-2010 to 11.18 million metric tons in 2017-2018.

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While our bodies need glucose (the form of sugar that is found in food) to function, an excess of glucose increases the risk of diseases such as diabetes and heart disease. According to the CDC, in 2016, heart disease was the leading cause of death in the U.S., while diabetes ranked in seventh place. Eating too much sugar can also lead to other problems such as weight gain and low energy.

In the age of convenience foods—fast food, take-out, Starbucks, smoothie shops—sugar is especially hard to avoid.

Moreover, high amounts of sugar release dopamine in our brains, the same reaction that happens to someone consuming addictive drugs. The rush of energy we feel after consuming sugar—which we call a “sugar high”—is only a momentary upper and we end up consuming more sugar to keep that high going. In an article on livescience.com, Stephanie Dunbar, director of nutrition and medical affairs at the American Diabetes Association, warns that it’s worse when we are drinking sugary drinks, such as soda and bubble tea, because unlike eating regular foods, our body doesn’t signal us when we’re full when we drink sugary drinks, so it we remain hungry and are prone to consume more.

Bubble tea, or boba, is a very popular drink at HBA. However, the 2015 US Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee believes that this “16 ounce boba drink exceeds the upper limit of added sugar intake.” Research from the July 2018 volume of Food Science and Nutrition shows that a regular 16-ounce boba drink contains about 38 grams of sugar (299 calories) and a 32-ounce drink contains about 57 grams of sugar (448 calories) depending on the ingredients added. With 25-38 grams being the recommended total per day for adults, even one boba drink takes you above the daily recommended amount.

Even though our brains require sugar (about 400 calories per day) to function well, the CDC says that one can get the required sugar amount from fruit and other naturally sweet foods. For example, the banana is a fruit that contains natural sugar instead of added sugar. Bananas also contain potassium, protein, and fiber, all which are beneficial ingredients for your body. Consumers should also pay attention to food ingredient labels to see what kinds of sugar they are consuming in processed foods. Ingredients such as high fructose corn syrup, cane sugar, corn sweetener, honey, and fruit juice are all different types of sugar that are used to sweeten food. The bottom line is that sugar should be consumed in moderation.

U.S. sugar consumption data from Statista.com.

Recommended and actual sugar intake data from American Heart Association.

INFOGRAPHIC BY KASANDRA MIAO (‘19)

2008-2009

2017-2018 6

Living the Dream THE JOURNEY TO WINNING THE 2018 LITTLE LEAGUE WORLD SERIES SPORTS FEATURE

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→ By Zadie Young (‘22)

Eighth grader Kory Chu, outfielder for the Honolulu Little League All Stars team, holds up a 2018 Little League World Series game ball.

PHOTOGRAPH BY ZADIE YOUNG (‘22)

Ever since they were little, the 14 boys on the Honolulu Little League All Stars team dreamed of playing in the World Series.

still had the same things in common—baseball and being at the World Series. All of the other teams were nice and we had a good time sharing the compound,” said Chu. He hopes to keep in touch with his new friends through Instagram.

And when it looked like their dreams were going to come true this When it came time to compete on the field, Chu said it was important year, outfielder Kory Chu—HBA eighth grader—could hardly believe for the team to keep calm, have fun, and enjoy every moment. Chu what was happening. said, “Before games, we would blast music in our dorms to get hyped This past August, Chu and his team played in the 2018 Little for the game. In addition, we would Facetime someone like Shane League World Series in Williamsport, Pennsylvania, and won it all, Victorino.” Victorino, a retired Major League Baseball player, was defeating South Korea for the champions title. It was not easy getting just one of many Hawaii celebrities who supported the team on their to Williamsport. First, they had to beat Hawaii teams to advance World Series journey. The team also received words of encouragement to the West Regionals. At the West Regionals, they had to prevail and congratulations from former President Barack Obama and NFL over teams from California, Arizona, Nevada and Utah to make it to quarterback Marcus Mariota. the World Series in Williamsport. Chu said that it was only through Hurricane Lane neared the Hawaiian islands just as the team was the coaches’ encouragement and countless practices that the team about to play their U.S. Championship game, causing a lot of worry managed to clinch the championship title. “When we won states, we for the team and their families. “When the hurricane was approaching did not think we could go this far. We were just happy to advance to Hawaii, I was worried about my family and friends, and at the same the next region,” he said. time I was focusing on the game itself. Every night I would pray for Chu has played baseball for five years and has spent the last three Hawaii not to get hit and it turned out that it worked,” Chu said. with his club team, the Honolulu Saints. To prepare for the World He added that the team felt even more motivated to do well in the Series, Chu and his Honolulu Little League All Stars teammates tournament as a win would take people’s minds away from the threat practiced three hours a day, of a hurricane disaster. The team conditioning and bonding with felt immense relief as the hurricane each other. eventually bypassed Oahu.

From home runs to strikeouts,

After defeating South Korea a grand slam and double plays in a 3–0 shutout, the Honolulu team to winning by a walk-off in their became one of only three teams from first World Series game against Hawaii to win a Little League World Georgia, the Honolulu team Series title. Recalling the winning blew spectators away with their play of the final game, Chu said, skills, remaining undefeated Eighth grader and outfielder Kory Chu, on the play that won “The moment when the last ball throughout the tournament his team the World Series title. was thrown felt so good because (5–0). One game at a time, the I’ve played for the coaches for three team won their way to the final game against South Korea. whole years. It just made me feel like the three years was worth it.”

The Honolulu team not only was known for winning, but also He noted that this moment will be one to treasure for years to come. for exhibiting great sportsmanship and positivity throughout the “I can always come back to the moment when I am in a slump or tournament. Along with the Georgia Little League team, the Honolulu something, and that will cheer me up,” he said. team was awarded the Jack Losch Little League Baseball World Series When the team returned to Hawaii, they were met at the airport by Team Sportsmanship Award, which recognizes teams for exemplary not only family members and friends, but also local politicians and sportsmanship on and off the field, including in the dormitories and complete strangers, waiting to congratulate them for their success. dining halls where they stay during the tournament.

The Royal Hawaiian Band added to the fanfare as supporters cheered The two teams’ sportsmanship stood out particularly when they faced with signs celebrating their triumphant return. A week and a half later, each other in the United States championship game. Before the game, a parade and a special event were held at the Honolulu Hale in honor Chu and his teammates presented Georgia with leis in appreciation of the team. Governor David Ige and Honolulu Mayor Kirk Caldwell of Georgia’s donation to a hurricane relief fund as Hurricane Lane presented the team with a Proclamation declaring September 8, 2018 approached Hawaii. On the field, both teams played their hardest. as Honolulu All Stars Little League Day. After the parade, the team Off the field, after Hawaii took the U.S. title, both teams continued was recognized at the University of Hawaii football game by getting to display excellent sportsmanship. to walk onto the field with the Rainbow Warriors, and participating During the three weeks that the Honolulu team spent in Williamsport, in the halftime performance by the UH marching band. the team played a lot of baseball but also had time for some fun.

With the 2018 World Series title under his belt, Chu will age out of While most of their free time was spent doing school work, Chu his division and no longer be eligible to compete in the Little League enjoyed trading pins and hanging out with his team, playing games World Series tournament. He described his journey thus far as a great like ping-pong to pass the time. They became a close group, which experience, one that he will never forget. At HBA, Chu plans to play benefited them on the field. They also had opportunities to meet and for the Pac-5 intermediate team in the spring. “Although I won,” he hang out with the other Little League teams from around the world. said, “I still have to try hard and do my best in intermediate baseball “Meeting other people was an awesome experience because when the time comes.” even though they were from different countries and spoke different languages, we could use Google Translate to communicate and we

“The moment when the last ball was thrown felt so good because I’ve played for the coaches for three whole years. It just made me feel like the three years was worth it.”

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A World Without Social Media → By Jayni Ishikawa (‘19)

FEATURE

The writer of this feature, senior Jayni Ishikawa, does not use social media.

During her free time, she enjoys reading non-fiction works. PHOTOGRAPHY BY ZADIE YOUNG (‘21).

Contrary to popular belief, not all teens have a social media account. According to Statista, roughly 23% of the U.S. population does not use social media. People with social media believe the world of communication is expanded. On the other hand, those without social media believe that communication in the real world has been made almost nonexistent by social media.

Many of those who have opted out of the social media world feel that it is something that threatens the safety of users. “I don’t have a social media account because my mom is pretty strict on cyber safety since she works in IT,” senior Lauren Uchimura explained. Cyber bullying is a well-known form of abuse, and it’s one of the big reasons why 23% of the U.S. dislikes using social media. Furthermore, once a person posts something online, it’s often hard to erase all traces of it if he changes his mind.

“I stay in touch with my friends through other means,” Uchimura said.

“I can still send pictures or videos to them over text, even if I can’t add filters or text effects.” English Department co-chair Faye Takushi, who also does not use social media, stated, “Social media is fine as long

as people don’t substitute it for face-to-face conversations.”

Takushi’s sums up her ambivalence this way: “American writer Henry David Thoreau wrote that an ‘unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind.’

Social media can easily become yet another “amusement,” another form of self-medicating. It can crowd out the desire to live deliberate, thoughtful lives.”

What was the world without social media like? “Simpler. Less distracting. More present, both with things and people. Social media feeds this feeling of ‘I must check this and watch that,’ when, really, we don’t,” Takushi said. Her days are full even without a virtual world to keep up with. “I do lots of school work: grading papers, planning lessons, creating curriculum, etcetera. Other than that, I read a lot of books and cook gluten-free meals.” Takushi said. Like Takushi, Uchimura doesn’t feel like she’s missing out. “I usually draw, read, or write music when I have free time,” Uchimura said.

English Department co-chair Dynah Ustare recalls a time when phone conversations were the primary way her family stayed in touch with friends. “My family had one phone mounted on the hallway wall, and when it rang, five eager hands competed for it. This wrangling for the phone was worst in the summer months when all five siblings, ranging from middle school to college, were home all at once,” she

said. Privacy was a real challenge, she added. “When the caller was a boy, I’d take the receiver (that’s very much attached to the cord) to the laundry room and partially close the door. I think all my siblings did the same because for at least a couple of times, that cord broke and had to be replaced,” she explained.

According to Smart Insights, only 7% of the U.S. population used social media in 2005; ten years later, in 2015, this rate jumped to 65%.

Currently, roughly 77 % of the U.S. population uses social media. As the number of social media and internet users grows worldwide, so have the problems that come with it. Social media marketing firm Mediakix estimates that 2.21 million people worldwide suffer from internet and social media addiction. Recently, France banned smartphones from all schools for children under 15 in an effort to “protect children and adolescents” from the “phenomenon of screen addiction [and] the phenomenon of bad mobile phone use,” according to a CNN report.

Those active on social media, on the other hand, believe they are

now more able to stay connected with friends. Senior Drew Yoshida, who uses Instagram and SnapChat, believes that more connections can be made and expanded through the use of social media. “Social media allows you to connect and share experiences with others,” Yoshida said. Teacher Stan Herder, who uses Facebook to stay in touch with old friends, said, “Positive things about social media are that people can have a voice on the internet, and I can contact people I’ve lost track of.” He added that the downside of social media is that there is a lot of false or unverified information on it, which leads people to make bad judgments and become ignorant of the truth.

Senior Mikayla Chun doesn’t have strong feelings for or against social media. “Something that all people can agree on is the need for communication,” she said. “Whether you would prefer to do it in person or over an electronic device, there is always a need to communicate. If you can’t, then it will be hard to go far in school, sports, relationships, and in life.”

A recent study by the National Bureau of Economic Research showed that graduates from “moderately selective” schools received the same income 20 years later as elite college graduates. Yet, even though this statistic should at least cast a shadow of doubt over the need to attend a top-tier college, many of us and our parents would most likely remain in the rat race for fear of missing out.

As the only child in my family, I can definitely say that I’m very privileged and a bit spoiled. Because of the “hands-off” parenting that my parents experienced in the 1970s, both my mother and father have made an extra effort to support me in everything that I do. Whether it’s a mock trial competition or a bowling match, my parents are there, giving me their full support, which is something they never got from their parents. While I’m grateful for that, there have been times where they go a bit overboard and excessively coach me. Although I greatly appreciate their feedback, like how to improve my solos during choir performances, they tend to overstep their boundaries by criticizing my bowling swing on the way to school or even during random moments when we’re all at home.

Despite my parents’ unnecessary coaching, they (especially my mother) know when to draw the line when it comes to parenting. Whenever I needed any clothes to be cleaned or when I was hungry, rather than just doing it all for me, my mother would teach me how to do it myself. While I complained and groaned, my mother would reply back with a famous Lao Tzu quote: “Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.”

For a long time, I never understood what she meant by that quote. But now, as I get ready to leave for college, I see that because of my parents, I’m now capable of living on my own. I’m proud to say that I’m able to cook my own meals and do my own laundry. As I read about the overparenting crisis in my generation, I’m thankful that my parents have given me all the tools and knowledge to be independent, putting me on a path to success.

Yet, while parenting experts and counselors continue to remind us that failure is a necessary experience that teaches important life skills, how many of our parents actually allow us to fail in what we do? In our success-oriented culture, failure is often seen as something to avoid entirely.

This overparenting crisis isn’t one-sided. Students also need to take initiative and voice their need for space. Although failure can be daunting and extremely unpleasant, it is only temporary. It’s also one of the only ways that people truly learn and grow. If we’re not afraid to fail, we are more likely to go out of our comfort zones and be exposed to different experiences, ideas, people, and places.

So in order to take more ownership of your lives, stop looking to your parents for things that you can or should be doing for yourselves. Other ways you can take control of your life would be to wake up on your own for school, find a part-time job to earn your own money, and most importantly, take responsibility for your grades—don’t blame your teachers or others. Instead, you should plan ahead. If you still can’t maintain good grades after that, then stop overloading your schedule with clubs, AP classes, or sports. If we all want to become successful adults, we need to start growing up now. It just doesn’t happen overnight.

OVERPARENTING From Page 1

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“...how many of our parents actually allow us to fail in what we do? In our success-oriented culture, failure is often seen as something to avoid entirely.”

River of Life Service Project → By Marcus Mau ('19)

BLOG

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Being extremely sheltered for 99% of my life made my service learning project at the River of Life Mission...special.

Manual labor wasn’t a problem (I had cut my grandpa’s lawn—a several hours-long endeavor—many times before). Being in a new setting was uncomfortable but I managed. Dealing with unfamiliar people didn’t top my bucket list but I enjoyed making acquaintances.

But to complete my service learning project, I had to do all of those things while standing shoulder-to-shoulder with people I was taught to avoid all my life: the homeless.

From a young age, I was taught never to talk to strangers. My mom told me a couple stories not just about strangers but about people asking for money. That was my first “exposure” to homeless people—a warning. She recounted a time before I was born, with her and my still infant sister sitting in a parking lot getting situated after a grocery run. My mom told me that in broad daylight, she was approached by a man asking for her help to find something. Needless to say she got spooked and when she began to start her car, he persisted and got more aggressive, pounding on her window. Later, she was told by the staff at the market we were at that the man was homeless.

But it’s not just concerned parents trying to protect their children who stigmatize homeless people. Society tells us to avoid eye contact with them at all costs, especially when stopped at a traffic light. We are told that those people are on the streets because they drank, gambled, or smoked their lives away.

There are news reports all the time treating them like a problem.

As I walked to the Mission on an early Wednesday morning, all these thoughts swirled around in my head. And when I spotted the tattered line of people that extended down the block and barred me from the sanctuary that was the Mission, I too, was spooked. After what felt like an eternity, someone came to the door. I rushed in faster than I thought my wimpy little legs could go.

The first day was a jumble of faces, voices and smells. I was told that the guests would try to get me to bend the rules and take advantage of me because I was new. That was reassuring. I was waiting for someone to try to take my glasses, the only possession of any real value aside from my clothes and tennis shoes. (I had stored my phone and keys in a locker under the impression the guests would attempt to snatch my belongings). In my privileged mind I was pleasantly surprised that no one tried to shove their hands down my pockets while I wiped tables.

After my shift was over and the dining room had been cleaned, my senses had the chance to relax. I realized the threat of imminent mortal

harm had lowered significantly. I realized I had worried for nothing.

Sure there were more than a few people who seemed unstable or out of control, but for the most part, everyone was harmless. Many people said “thank you” and told me I was doing a great job bussing tables.

Yeah, the dining room smelled funny and the smell clung to my clothes, but all in all, I couldn’t complain. I mean, when you see people at the Mission who can smile, you realize how privileged you are.

But more than just teaching me about being grateful for what I have, volunteering at the Mission taught me that most homeless people are just looking for their next meal and someone who will give them respect. From what I saw, I think that the Mission gives people a sense of normality and safety, like a haven for the weary. The Mission, for all intents and purposes, functioned like a regular restaurant that served regular people. There were people at the front of the house seating patrons, a neat buffet line that formed automatically, and busboys (my proud position) hurrying around the dining room keeping tables clean.

I had seen some of the patrons out on the streets before and had only viewed them as people to avoid.

Because of the Mission, that sense of panic when approaching a homeless person has since been dispelled.

Make no mistake, if a guy at the bus stop is shirtless and screaming bloody murder, I’m not going to stand next to him. But, if a homeless person is near me, I don’t feel the same anxiety as I did before the Mission.

That person is just like me. His or her hardships far outweigh mine, but we still have a lot in common. I am not better than that person because I get to have a roof over my head. And they are perhaps stronger than me because they don’t have a place to call home, yet they plug on.

“But more than just teaching me about being grateful for what I have, volunteering at the Mission taught me that most homeless people are just looking for their next meal and someone who will give them respect.”