Mind over chatter: What happens when the scented candles and staging furniture vanish?

Buying property is always an emotional decision. And, to a certain extent, it should be. You need to love where you live.

But don’t fall for tactics that aim to play on emotions from pleasure to panic.

Understanding how to keep your head during a property negotiation can save you from a bad case of buyer’s remorse. And forewarned is forearmed when it comes to resisting psychological tricks.

Real estate agents may deploy a range of tried and true tactics that play on emotional cues to fire up the often-illogical part of our brains, known as the limbic system. The limbic system – often referred to as the emotional nervous system – plays a role in processing memories and emotions, governing how we interpret social cues to respond with either anxiety, anger, fear or excitement.

Here’s how it can be used against you, and how to guard against it.

Using smell to sell

Scent is one of the strongest triggers of emotion and memory. Pleasant or familiar smells can put you at ease, triggering memories of feeling comfortable and cosy. What better way to make a house feel like a home?

Be mindful of things like scented candles, coffee brewing or bread baking. These are are all designed to trigger your limbic system to take over and make you feel predisposed to finding a space warm and inviting.

DO: Bear in mind nice smells can create a disproportionately positive impression and, at worst, may be used to mask unpleasant odours that may point to other issues with the property.

Creating a sense of urgency

Some physicists will have you believe the strong nuclear force is the most powerful fundamental force in the universe.

But these physicists have clearly never shopped online and received a notification that interest in the DIY unicorn hat for cats you saved is increasing. Before you know it, you have a cat in a hat.

Without a doubt, FOMO (fear of missing out) is one of the most irresistible forces in nature. Multiple consumer studies have shown people feel the pain of loss much more acutely than the pleasure of a gain. So, it’s little wonder this fear is exploited as a sales tactic the world over.

Some ways vendors and agents can pull the loss aversion lever on a property purchase include:

• Telling you another buyer is coming for a second inspection and will probably be submitting an offer.

• Encouraging offers before an upcoming auction date in return for taking the property off the market.

DO: Create some urgency on your side. Tell agents you have a purchase window, finance in place and other homes to inspect. Remember it’s a big bonus if you also have a home to sell – listings are the real prize. Be firm without being aggressive. A vendor or agent looking to sell before auction may indicate concern the property may be passed in. 

Try to identify the seller’s motivations and frame your offer accordingly. For example, do they want to sell to a family, or would a short settlement or long settlement benefit them? 

Some buyers swear by writing a personal letter to vendors. Former FBI hostage negotiator turned business negotiator Chris Voss says it is harder for people to negotiate aggressively with people who have been personalised. 

Sharing selective sales data 

Agents may share outlier data on recent home sales in a suburb that skew low or high to shift your price expectations. For example, they may have selected properties in which the vendor needed to sell quickly. 

DO: Always conduct your own research on sale prices, rather than relying on agents. Track sold data for your target area on realestate.com.au. 

Consider a temporary RP Data subscription which allows you to look up the sale price and history of individual properties, as well as suburb data. Knowing whether a home has been bought and sold frequently, and at what price, can help alert you to any potential problems with the area or site. 

The scourge of underquoting 

The more people who turn up to an auction or open house, the more psychological pressure is heaped on potential buyers. Lately, there’s been a great deal of media attention around allegations agents are deliberately sharing low guide prices for properties to maximise the number of buyers in attendance, with reports of some properties selling for nearly 40 per cent more than the published guide price. 

Underquoting is generally considered to be at play when a home sells for more than 10 per cent above the highest guide price. Although some States have laws against the practice, it’s notoriously difficult to prove it is deliberate, rather than a bull market. 

DO: Take time to do your homework on recent sales so you have a good idea what a home is worth. Don’t be afraid to be upfront with agents about price expectations and lodge a formal complaint if you feel you have been deliberately misled. Agents should be able to give you a reasonable idea what price the vendor is hoping to achieve, and what the market will pay, without wasting everyone’s time. 

Auction anxiety 

Stress triggers most of us to revert to panicked decisions governed by the limbic system. And auctions can be the perfect storm. 

You’ve fallen in love with a property and you’re in a busy, noisy public setting – often standing in the sun. The auctioneer’s job is to be a fast and furious speaker, luring bidders into the frenetic excitement of the moment. 

Having a solid auction plan is increasingly important as more properties go under the hammer. Recent data indicates the proportion of listings going to auction has jumped from 26 per cent in 2009 to 48 per cent in 2025. 

DO: Try to flip the script and slow the auctioneer by bidding in unusual increments. Bids of $5000 or even $1000 can be calculated quickly. Try a bidding in increments of $1800 or $3400. It will force the auctioneer to think more carefully and naturally slow the pace. 

Alternately, consider hiring a buyer’s advocate, also known as a professional bidder. Although an additional cost, they bring a cool head and an understanding of auction strategy to the table.