Happening Digital Volume 1 | Issue 8 | Jan 2023

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?

There used to be a joke gay people used to tell our straight compatriots when they would ask how safe it was to go to “gay bars” We would answer flippantly,”the worse that happens is that someone will side eye to what someone is wearing and if you were a women we would re-style your hair.” This USED to be true. But, lately I’ve been noticing a change.

In the last month, I’ve witnessed 3 (yes 3) full-on, western style BAR FIGHTS at local establishments I frequent. Now granted, the nights these brawls happened were on especially busy weekends where most of the predominantly male patrons were elbows to assholes tight in very small spaces. Nonetheless, it was still shocking to me to see this new phenomenon because I’ve never been used to AGGRESSIVENESS in gay clubs. So, I began to do a bit of research among my friends and this is what I found out. Get ready some of these responses might catch you off guard. Lord knows they did me.

First feedback I received was the general “everyone has been locked up for so long they are just letting off steam.” I call bullshit. How long does the pandemic have to have passed (especially in a state like Florida that truly had no real protocol to speak of against Covid 19) before people re-establish a since of normalcy and with that civility? In fact, I remember when we all finally were allowed to see each other again at our local restaurants and bars, we were so overwhelmed with gratitude that some of us were moved to tears of joy just to see the friends we missed. I think any steam left over to “blow off” is strictly in the heads of the people that look for any excuse to lose their cool in public. I might be wrong, so we can agree to factor that in. Next I heard “well this is the new normal after the Trump presidency”. Okay, this one has some merit. I have found that people, from all walks of life and social circles, definitely find it more acceptable to spew whatever stupidity they have always felt deep inside, were brought up believing or are parroting off of whichever media site they get their news from. But, what does that have to do with actually going to the next level of throwing fists and wielding beer bottles like swords in a Viking movies? I think very little. In fact, is really just a lack of self control. Remember Michelle Obama’s quote,”When they go lowWE GO HIGH...”, Now it is more like if someone goes low, you better swerve and get out of the way before getting clobbered. Personally, I think we all need to revisit how we felt when people outside our communities were calling us names and attacking us to remember how that felt. Also, do we really need to add to the violence AMONGST OURSELVES when there are so many others willing to come into our community and hunt us down literally at our watering holes like gazelles? Get a grip guys! There is enough HATE out there for us to be turning against each other no matter what philum we find ourselves in. Finally, this once caught me by surprise. TESTOSTERONE INJECTIONS, Human Growth Serums and other miscellaneous male supplements. WOW! Never would of thunk it. So, now the swinging (ahem) hammer we have to duck from having of LOW “T” is TOO MUCH “T”? Well, I can confess the general aroma in most men’s bars these days is wafting with the scent of body odor (no judgment), beer and Lysol. There is no secret that the proverbial pendulum has swung back to the most gay men appreciating the style of more NATURAL men these days. I myself prefer a burlier man, but I still want him to be a gentleman. It’s no secret those of us that spend countless hours at the gym attract more attention among others in a crowd. I’m not going to lie, a nice set of biceps has always been my weakness. But, if I had to choose between a big brute with a heaving chest and grimacing face or a well-mannered kind bear that hasn’t seen the inside of a gym in 5 years - THE BEAR WINS EVERY TIME! Just because you are “masculine acting” (whatever that means) doesn’t mean you are acting like a MAN. Plus, if you are making others feel intimidated by the energy you are projecting, you might want to revisit if that is the vibe you really want to put out.

In the end, I’m hoping this is just a phase or growing pains we are going through in our community. I know that I am grateful to the leather men and bears in my community that have stood up on behalf of those of us that need their protection sometimes. I’m always proud when I see those guys acting like LIONS protecting their PRIDES. I know it makes me feel safer when I go out these days. Seriously guys, aren’t we all just out to have a bit of fun and can’t we do that without ruffling each other feathers? I say we can. More over, WE SHOULD.

Light, Love and Peace, Francisco Garcia Publisher of HAPPENING

This time of year is full of resolutions right? What do we want to differently for ourselves? What changes do we want to make? One of the most common resolutions for many is to lose weight and/or get into better physical shape. My weight loss journey began in the summer of 2015. At that time, I was the heaviest I have ever been at 260 lbs. Forget resolutions by that point! It was time to made radical decisions about my life moving forward. I was in my late 40’s and things like high cholesterol, early on-set diabetes, cardiovascular issues were on the horizon should I not do something drastic to lose weight.

To get you up to speed, I did some research and located a reputable weight loss facility in Durham, North Carolina where I spent 30 days in the summer and 30 days in the winter. I lost 20 lbs in each of my stays. Even more importantly than the # on the scale, was the knowledge I acquired through their classes, therapists and coaches. That knowledge has led me to lead a healthy lifestyle and have a better understanding that losing weight is so much more than exercising or choosing the right types of food. It’s a MIND-SET! There are no quick fixes! Patience is required in anyone’s weight loss journey. There will be “plateaus”. You can do all the right things and remain at the same weight for weeks or even months. This is what our bodies do. They hold on to the familiar. But if we keep pushing through, the plateaus end and the weight loss begins anew.

Seven years later, I now weigh in at 189 lbs. I am so much closer to my goal weight of 165 lbs. I am 53 and feel so much zest for life! I play tennis on a regular basis and even go to the gym (the latter which I used to hate). Having a partner that loves doing these activities is a plus I must say!

So, I no longer have any particular new year’s resolutions. I just want to continue moving along on this healthy path. KEEPING the weight off has already been a huge success. It has been slow, but it has been steady. And because of that, it is SUSTAINABLE. Fad diets are NOT! There’s a huge industry that make it seem that weight loss is easy & fast! But, what they don’t tell us is the moment you stop their “diet”, the weight comes back and then some. So I will end with guidelines I live by which have proven very effective for me. They were written by Geneen Roth, in her book - Women, Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything.

7 THINGS TO REMEMBER

Eat when you are hungry.

Eat sitting down in a calm environment (this does not include the car)

Eat without distractions. Distractions include radio, tv, newspapers, books, intense or anxiety producing conversations or music.

Eat what your body wants.

Eat until you are satisfied.

Eat (with the intention) of being in full view of others.

Eat with enjoyment, gusto and pleasure.

I hope 2023 is good to ALL OF US. I look forward to sharing more with all of you about the mind/body connection. I have a particular interest in mental health issues which many of us have come to know are so very important in every facet of our lives and I look forward to sharing some of the things I’ve learned with you all!

The first time I met DAISY DEADPETALS was directly after one of her performances in South Florida where she had just finished having a fit of terets syndrome shouting out explitives and then brought the number home by pulling out an enormous phallus and ejaculatiing hand creme (I hope) towards the audience. The patrons of the club were LIVING FOR IT!

I was terrified. But then, she came up to my table and disarmed my fear with a wonderful warm smile and a sweet disponsition. I was hooked. I’ve been a DEADHEAD PETALPUSHER fan since that fateful day. As an ICON of drag around the world, I was curious to catch up with her now and find out what was going on in that mind of hers. ENJOY!

HDM: How long as the character of Daisy Deadpetals stomped the Earth?

DD: Daisy was created in the mid 90s; however, SHE is timeless.

HDM: How did your characters name come to happen?

DD: Daisy DeadPetals is actually a song by one of my favorite artists, Tori Amos. I was obsessed with her in the 90s. And, since I started drag at 19, and was kind of a gothic kid, the name fit my inner teen angst, which was still hangin’ around.

HDM: How would you describe your particular style of perfomance?

DD: I think of it as performance art, with a splash of insanity.

HDM: If you were not doing DRAG what would you be doing?

DD: I’d HAVE to be doing something CREATIVE – starving actor, starving stand-up or possibly make-up.

HDM: What do you think of ICONS like Sasha Colby doing Rupaul’s Drag Race Season 15 and would you ever consider sending in an audition tape?

DD: I think it’s incredible that Sasha Colby is on! We’ve worked together, not only is she incredibly talented, the BITCH is one hell of a good time and a great person too. I think that is who SHOULD be on the show. I see many performances from contestants on the show when they are touring. You have these queens who literally have only done drag a handful of times who may look great since they’ve watched millions of hours on YouTube make-up tutorials in their bedroom, but sadly, the performance comes off very green. Then you have someone like Sasha! I love the professionalism she brings, not to mention the TALENT baby! You must have experience on a real stage to hone those skills and bring them to the table. I love seeing established entertainers on the show.

I’ve actually auditioned 4 times. I’d love to audition again. Honestly, it’s rather soul crushing when you DON’T get on. This is my one true love, really the only job I’ve ever had and the only thing I can see myself doing. Hell, it’s truly the only thing I’m good at! LOL! But, of course, I’d give the audition process another go. And, trust, it is no joke baby! Producing the video is like having another job for a few months with the details that go into making it.

HDM: What do you do when you have free time?

DD: Drag is literally a full time commitment. Even when I’m off, I put shows together, or I’m buying fabric for costumes. There’s a lot of prep work. If I do have a free moment, I’ll be watching scary movies. They’re my favorite.

HDM: What does a week in the life of DAISY DEADPETAL look like?

DD: Well, my week starts on Wednesdays. I host BINGO with the fabulous boys from Flock Fest Events at Tatts And Tacos at 8pm. Then later that night, at 11:30 I’m slingin’ strippers for the crazy fun at the New Meat Contest at LeBoy with Eris and DJ Tpro. I then wake up on Thursday (sometime in the afternoon) and prepare to host Bingo Bitch at LIT. Which is a HOOT by the way honey! We give away fabulously naughty prizes from BedroomBox.biz and cool collectibles from To The Moon, it’s always packed and gets pretty wild for a BINGO game. When Friday rolls around, I host and perform at Chris Rhoades Block Party in West Palm Beach at Hullabaloo. Directly after that, I make my way to the ever packed MANOR to perform at 1:30am for Bubble Gum Fridays. Saturday slithers in and I host the 2 dinner shows at the world famous LIPS Cabaret, who just celebrated their 15th anniversary! Finally, Sundays I host drag brunch at Holy Mackerel, then perform for the Naugh-Tea show at 6pm at The Fort Lauderdale

I’M

HDM: What’s next in the world of DAISY DEADPETALS?

DD: WHAT’S NEXT? Very excited for thIs actually! I’ll be hosting Liquid Saturdays at the brand new club, KRAVE, which opens in February. It’s going to be like nothing anyone has seen! First of all, there will be both MALE and FEMALE dancers that will be FULLY NUDE! They are also featuring fierce dominatrix’ stomping around. The lap dances will start in the center of the room before heading to the private area. Drag shows, and other wildly talented entertainers of ALL KIND! And, I’ll basically be the ringmaster of this fantastic fantasy land! It will be every Saturday night with doors opening at 11:11pm!

EAGLE. Monday and Tuesday -

DEAD. LOL!

Joe Salg is arguably the biggest fan of POP ICON Cyndi Lauper since the beginning of her career in the 80s. To many in the LGBTQA+ community Cyndi is more than just an ally, she is the member of OUR FAMILY that speaks from her heart on behalf of us all. To Joe, she is a friend and symbol for how the world should be - a safe haven for everyone that’s a little “unsual”.

For years Joe has been collecting all kinds of artifacts big, small, fancy or downright weird to pull together one of the most comprehensive collections of Cyndi Lauper memorabilia. Just like Cyndi has been using HER voice on the behalf of the LGBTQA+ community, Joe is now using HIS voice on behalf of her to call for Cyndi Lauper’s induction into the ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME! Check out this awesome interview with owner of the museum and expert of ALLTHINGS SHE-BOPIANJoe Salg!

HDM: What made you want to spearhead this movement to get 80s ICON Cyndi Lauper into the ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME?

JS: Each year I’d see the nominations announced and think… ‘Why hasn’t Cyndi been nominated yet?!’ She’s been eligible since 2009 but has been overlooked which saddens me… she’s the person to break the Beatles record when she scored 5 Top-10 hits off her debut album ‘She’s So Unusual.’ Cyndi helped define the look and sound of the 80’s and became a pied piper of sorts for all geeks and freaks. Cyndi Lauper made it cool to be an outcast.

HDM: What attracted you to the pop star in the first place?

JS: It was NOT ‘Girls Just Want To Have Fun.’ It was ‘Time After Time’ with her sweet softness combined with the checkerboard shaved hair on one side and flaming red mane on the other. I had never seen such confidence in being oneself regardless of what others think. She spoke to the 14 year old gay me who didn’t fit in anywhere. So many Cyndi fans talk about her setting an example for them … and giving us the inner strength to show our ‘True Colors.’

HDM: You have a museum dedicated to your favorite “unusual girl”. How did that become a reality and where is it located?

JS: Like most teens, I collected clippings, records and posters. Until one day at the Hard Rock Cafe, I saw that they had Madonna’s tooth in a display and I thought ‘I want to do something crazy like that.’ So I now have so many pieces ranging from Cyndi’s bra, wig, tour outfits, the blouse from her driver’s license photo and even the microphone she blew out her voice on in 1977 doing rock covers of Led Zeppelin. She was told she’d never sing again and yet now everyone knows who Cyndi Lauper is. The biggest and

BEST Cyndi Lauper collection in the world is here in Orlando and a private tour can be scheduled for free. Just email CyndiMuseum@gmail.com

HDM: What is your most treasured item in the museum?

JS: Probably her blue dress from the ‘Bring Ya To The Brink’ album, a perfect dance record from 2008 which was criminally overlooked. It’s a vintage prom dress that she wore for a photo shoot in a Connecticut trailer park. The message? Make fun and glamour wherever you are!

HDM: What can our readers do to help further getting Cyndi finally and rightfully acknowledged by the ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME?

JS: PLEASE give 30 seconds to sign our petition to have Cyndi nominated for induction. Just go to www. InductCyndiLauper. com to give us your name and email. I promise: NO SPAM. We’re collecting this ONLY for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame committee. Also, tell just ONE friend to help. Cyndi has always been good to our community and we want to show some love back.

“Jason is so gay.” These words were spoken once by an ex-boyfriend as we sat watching Friday the 13th Part II. It was more like I was forcing him to watch it, and he was just doing it to appease my nerdy obsession. As a slasher film fanatic and a hardcore Friday the 13th lover, I quickly took offense to this notion. Jason is NOT gay, I fired back. The ex was using the label, not as a pejorative, but as a way of describing Jason’s own sexual identity. “He’s sooo gay,” he said, pausing right before the Jeff/Sandra shish kebab death scene. I felt that he was reading too much into these films. I saw them as forms of entertainment that made my adolescent years somewhat bearable, and he was theorizing and analyzing them like Jason was strapped down to Freud’s couch.

The ex would not let up,“Why do you like watching these films? They are so heteronormative. Where is the queer POV of these films? Jason is so gay!” Just like the hundreds of deaths I watched unfold in these Friday the 13th films, I was witness to the eye-gouging death of my very own relationship.

I would think about this conversation with my ex-boyfriend years later as I made my way through the machete-wielding canon while writing my own PhD dissertation. After years of studying Queer Theory, Critical Race Theory and observing the lack of queer representation in mainstream horror films, the lights finally came on. Those questions my ex-boyfriend so fierily exclaimed bubbled up to the surface, and I finally had to dissect a franchise that I cherished so much. These were films that stayed in my conscious since the first time I witnessed the beheading of Mrs. Voorhees at the age of five with my older brother, watching from a couch with amusement at the little monster he was creating by supplying me with sequel after sequel. This was the basis of our brotherly relationship.

By queering the Friday the 13th franchise, I am certainly not stating the obvious. People tend to go to the overbearing mother/timid son dynamic of Jason and Mrs. Voorhees. What mother would not seek out revenge for the horrible drowning of her son by ill equipped camp counselors, and what son would not do the same when that victim is his own mother? Queering the franchise looks at it through my own queer lens and the items that I have picked up in the process of watching these films over and over again through the years. This has been the genius of the series as a whole. The viewer can take it upon themselves to see things that others may not have seen before. It is why we keep coming back for more. If one examine this franchise through intersections of race, gender, and sexuality. You can look at its place in the historical context of an epidemic that eradicated millions, who among those were many queer fans, as well as creative artists who were involved with the films.

So, Jason IS as gay as the fans that love him.

Sasha Colby has been described as a “beauty queen” , a “drag legend” and a “pageant legend” . She won the Miss Continental competition in 2012.

She is also a trans/model activist. In 2020, Sasha represented Hawaii in GLAAD’s video, which featured drag queens from all 50 states and Washington, D.C., and sought to mobilize voters in the 2020 U.S. Presidential election.

In 2018, Sasha Colby was cast in Sasha Velour’s drag showcase NightGowns and appeared in the stage show’s 2020 docuseries. Alongside other drag queens, Sasha Colby walked the runway before Jennifer Lopez’s performance at the iHeartRadio Music Awards wearing a look inspired by JLo.

Sasha Colby is competing on the current 15th season of RuPaul’s Drag Race. She is the “drag mother” of season fourteen contestant Kerri Colby. She is sure to show all the viewers this season how mother knows BEST .

MARCIA MARCIA @marciax3nyc

The new season of Rupaul’s Drag Race season 15 is featuring Marcia Marcia Marcia, who was recently seen Off-Broadway as an Angel in Kinky Boots and in the national tour of Hello, Dolly! starring Carolee Carmello. This Brady girl has done it all!

Marcia Marcia Marcia describing herself as a “Marcia of all trades,” she creates handmade costumes for her performances and creates her own mixes for her New York City performance.

“Marcia is a way that I can really channel all of my artistic abilities into one project that I care about. I like to say, ‘For drag queens, New York City is a place where your Broadway dreams go to die and then you become a drag queen because you’re like, ‘Oh I have all this performance experience, I got to put it somewhere,’” she shared in a new video introducing the queens. Check out this retro flavored fire-cracker in the upcoming episodes of RPDR 15!

MARCIA