Freshers' Week Saturday Edition

Contents

Editorial

This is the last of the GUUi issues for Freshers’ Week 2013, which means the end of Freshers’ is nigh.

We hope you had an amazing time. Just make sure you go out with style by attending the Ten Hour Superhero Party tonight and the Pyjama Party tomorrow.

Claire Flynn GUU Libraries Convenor

3 - Hello!

4 - Highlights - Today in GUU 5 - How To Survive The Ten Hour Superhero Party 7 - Live from the Last NightPhotographs 9- Lads Mags- The Freshers’ Week Debate

10 - GUU Overheard and Jokes Of The Day Editor-in-Chief (GUU Libraries Convenor) Claire Flynn

Editorial Team (GUU Libraries Committee) Lucy Keown If you’d like to conHarriet Johnston tribute to the GUUi in Kirsty McKenzie any way; editorially, Kate Whitaker writing or photography Kathryn Stevenson e-mail: libraries@ Joseph Meaden Find us online... guu.co.uk guuimagazine.wordpress. com The opinions expressed issuu.com/guui in this publication do not facebook.com/guuaye represent those of the twitter.com/guuimagazine Glasgow University Union.

Hello,

how great was last night? From the infamous Iron Stomach to the lovely Open Mic to our crazy Varsity Party with Ministry Of Sound we had someting for everyone. You guys are genuinely the object of jealousy for thousands of second, third and fourth year students, let alone all those sad sad graduates, who all wish they could be a carefree fresher once more. So make sure you don’t waste a minute of this week and do EVERYTHING you possibly can! This is going to be one of the best weeks of your life. While we recommend you try out both student unions and lots of different activities during your FW13 experience, we have to tell you that we have the most amazing line up at GUU this year, which quite frankly blows everyone else’s efforts out of the water.

From the Special Games Party to the more chilled Pyjama Party and hangover movies. Exciting events from The Freshers’ Week -3-

Debate to the 10 Hour Superhero Party and so much more, we have something to get involved in for absolutely everyone. Even you. And if you want to have a knees-up or just a few beers, we have the legendary Beer Bar open all week, right at the heart of the Union. Keep up to date with what’s going on this week in our posters and leaflets papering campus, on Facebook at facebook.com/GUUnion, on Twitter @GUUnion, and on our brand new mobileapp by typing myapp.is/ guufreshers into your web browser. There’s no excuse for missing out!

So what are you waiting for?

Grab your friends, old and new, that weird flatmate no one likes and the mature student from the floor above, and get down here ASAP. The booths in the Beer Bar are filling up. We’ll see you soon.

Lots of love The GUUi

Highlights Today in Glasgow University Union...

10 Hour Superhero Party- 6pm, GUU

Grab your best Superman/Iron Man/Spiderman costume and get down for our infamous Ten Hour party.

Special Games Party- 7pm, Reading Room

Spend your Saturday in the company of the GUU Games Committee who are hosting a party for all you lot.

Freshers’ Week Debate- 7pm, Debates Chamber

GUU is famous for debating having won the World Debating Championships five times. The topic tonight is Lads Mags. So make sure and have a more intellectual evening and grab some of our free Yakka cocktail afterwards.

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How To Survive The Te How to survive a ten hour club

night at GUU is a question which, as a fresher, will be swirling around the inner workings of your hungover, homesick and hyped-up minds this Freshers’ Week. The idea of drinking, dancing and murdering Westlife on the karaoke from 6pm – 4am is such an amazing idea that I’m sure you’re all wondering if it is, in fact, too good to be true... but it is! Yes, you CAN sing jukebox classics in the Beer Bar all night, then mosey upstairs to the Debates Chamber to show off your classic mom-dancing, go to one of our many bars to hydrate on several Pints of Fun, and end up back in the Reading Room for karaoke because you want to sing from the very microphone Brian McFadden gave a legendary rendition of ‘Uptown Girl’ from (17th May 2013, a.k.a the best day of my life). Drunk me is obsessed with Westlife, apparently. “How could we possibly survive something as awesome as that!?” I hear you clamour – well, follow our guidelines and you’ll not miss out on a thing.

Even if you do a sneaky double -5-

strawpedo (which is very hard by the way).

YOU WILL NEED: Non-high maintenance clothes. Like a velour tracksuit or something... Money.

Just ‘cause it’s obvious doesn’t make it less true folks. Pre-drinks vitally including caffeine, in any consumable form.

Lucozade tablets, vodka coffee (yum), Dragon Soop... you name it!

1. Get down to the GUU for 6pm so you can proudly declare at your wedding, the birth of your firstborn and the day you climb Mount Everest that yes, you have indeed completed a 10 Hour, and you’re bloody proud of it.

Everyone will be dead impressed, honest.

2. Rotate. Beer bar, smoking area, karaoke, DJ, and back to the Beer Bar again. Variety is the spice of

en Hour Superhero Party cuse to move on if you’re bored of someone’s chat. Simples.

3. Strawpedos. Many, and often.

4. Girls, bring your makeup and perfume, boys your Lynx and hair gel... intensive repair work usually needs done around 2am, without which by 4am you look like a victim of nuclear warfare.

5. I’m just gonna put this out there, as much as you want to impress your new friends, don’t go buying too many rounds for your flat and the flat above and for Flat D in the block down the road. You’ll not find your beneficiaries for the rest of the night, will have no money and will have no 50ps for the jukebox. Nightmare.

6. Give the karaoke a go. I’m challenging you ‘I’m too cool’ types or the ‘I can’t sing for shit’ people.

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Gather your pals, slur something

by Peter Andre down the mike, and have a whale of a time. Guaranteed it will make your night.

7. Don’t pull too early. If at all possible. Leaving after 2 hours with someone will give you massive FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out, duh) the next day... but an early pull is better than none I guess. What I’m trying to say is string them along for as loooooooong as you humanly can. Congratulations in advance if you experience this problem, by the way.

10 Hour is one of my favourite GUU traditions, so above all give it a shot and try to stay for as long as you can. Yes, you might be more exhausted than you’ve ever been in your life, your best friend might have just vomited in your hair, someone might have poured their cherry VK down your white skirt; but it is all worth it at 4am.. and that’s a promise.

-Lucy Keown

LIVE FROM

Like us at facebook.com/ from GUU Fres -7-

LAST NIGHT

/GUUnion to see all photos shers’ Week ‘13 -8-

Lads Mags

At GUU we love a good debate and fresher’s week is no excep-

tion. We’ve got a juicy one for you to get your teeth stuck into- lad mags. With the new campaign launching to ‘lose the lad mags’ the debates committee have decided to bash out some opinions on the matter.

The Co-operative have given titles such as Front, Loaded, Nuts and Zoo until 9th September to cover-up their front pages with sealed modesty bags or be taken off sale in its store. This move has prompted a questioning of standards within the industry. As the retail owns over 4,000 outlets it sets the tone for the rest of the industry to follow.

The decision assumes signs of progression however, is it actually a step backwards in our society? Although the decision is made in response to concerned customers, Times columnist Camilla Long argues that “the less we cover up and the more open we are about breasts then the less hysteria we have about them.” So taking into consideration that perhaps less is more, our debates will have plenty of ammunition to argue about. We thought we’d give you a little taster with some pros and cons.

PRO Sexual liberation Freedom of Speech Double standards with female

CON Inappropriate for children Encouraging Sexism Inflicts degrading opinion of women.

Featuring Gareth Bennell from the Co-operative , Angela Towers from the No More Page 3 campaign and Laura Lacole, glamour model, as well as some of our fantastic internal speakers including Nathan Paulson, Duncan Crowe and John McKee, this is an event not to be missed.

-Kathryn Stevenson

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GUU Overheard Be careful guys- the walls have ears...

What’s the point if you can’t see the pants.

I’ve had you before and I will have you again.

Can anyone do maths?

Of course we can’t; we’re all on Libraries.

I am Marmite to the people of Murano; they either love me or hate me.

Jokes Of The Day In order to ward off any post-alcohol blues we’ll provide you with a couple of hilarious (ly awful) jokes.

Some people say that alcohol makes you smarter... well it sure made Budweiser.

A local newspaper was holding a pun competition so a man sent in ten puns. He hoped by sending in ten he would have a chance of winning. No pun in ten did.

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