Roanoke Valley Family Magazine July 2019

VOLUME 7 ISSUE 11 • JULY 2019 | VIRGINIAFAMILY.COM

Free Range

Summers:

How to Raise a Boy Right

F O R M E R LY

Being a kid in an unplugged era

G R O W I N G

U P

I N

T H E

VA L L E Y

your sight is our vision Vistar doctors have the passion and training to provide you the highest quality healthcare for your eyes.

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VistarEye.com | 540.855.5100

Publisher’s Note 75 issues!

It is amazing to think that this is the 75th time we have published Growing Up In the Valley….oops! Roanoke Valley Family Magazine! It still is hard to remember our name change!

Over 75 issues, we have printed over 1,000,000 copies, featured over 60 teachers of the month, 75 parents of the month and listed over 4,000 events in our calendar pages! It has been an amazing ride.

We have changed our name and look over the past few issues and this issue is the culmination of all of the work our staff has put in to make our magazine even better!

You will see a new design, a new layout and some other great additions to our monthly publication. Take a look around and see what you think! If you have any ideas on how we can get even better, please let us know!

This month, we have also lost one of our favorite partners and advertisers. Center In the Square has decided to not be a part of our magazine going forward as they are putting their support behind some other

local publications. While we will miss them in our pages, we understand the need to try some other opportunities.

The loss of their support is a good opportunity to remind you, our readers, that the businesses you frequent because you have read about them in our magazine, really need to know how you heard about their business, their event or their sale. We rely on advertisers to pay to produce this magazine and without them, we would not be able to do what we do for our community. When businesses like Center In the Square do not hear that we are driving business their way, then they leave our pages.

Anika celebrates middle school graduation with family.

So, we make this plea to you!

The next time you visit any of our advertisers, please let them know that we are an integral part of your monthly planning for your family. Please tell them that the reason that your family is visiting their business is because of us, Roanoke Valley Family Magazine.

That kind of support from our readers will ensure that we have at least another 75 issues to produce!

Happy summer everyone!

Proud Members of the Parenting Media Association since 2013!

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C o n t a c t Us: P.O. Box 4484, Roanoke, VA 24015 540-251-1660 www.roanoke.family

Publishers

Josh & Andrea Eagan

josh@virginiafamily.com • Anika and Evelyn’s Parents

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Contributors

Rebecca Mushko • Kimberly Emory • Jamie Lober Susan Baldani • Erica Corder • Georgianne Vecellio

Creative Director Tracy Fisher

tracy@virginiafamily.com • Charlotte and Evelyn’s Mom

Community Relations Director Jeanne Lawrence

jeanne@virginiafamily.com • Parker and Connor’s Mom

Submit Your Ideas Share your story ideas with us by emailing jackie@virginiafamily.com

jackie@virginiafamily.com • Elijah’s Mom, and Luke and Blair’s Stepmom

We reserve the right to refuse or edit any materials submitted to us as we deem inappropriate for our audience. Please include a self-addressed, stamped envelope with any submission to be returned. We do not accept responsibility for unsolicited materials.

Sara Hodnett

sara@virginiafamily.com

Sales Assistants Ani & Evie Eagan

sales@virginiafamily.com • Bauer and Chloe’s Owners

Webmaster

John Morris • COV Designs john@covdesigns.com

/growingupinthevalley

© Copyright 2019 Mofat Publishing We welcome reader comments, submissions, and the support of advertisers.

Sales Executive - Lynchburg

Connect With Us

• Rachel Levine • Jacqueline Moon

Editor

Jacqueline Moon

Read Our Other Publications

Growing Up In the Valley and Growingupinthevalley.com are published

by MoFat Publishing. Growing Up In the Valley is published monthly.

The views and the opinions expressed by the writers and advertisers do not necessarily represent those of Growing Up In the Valley, its staff, or its contributors. While multiple businesses, schools, and organizations are represented in our pages, and magazines are often distributed to students according to the policies and procedures of each school district, this is not a publication coordinated or endorsed by any public or private school district, nor is it a publication with any religious or political objectives. As a mass media outlet, it is our oath and responsibility to communicate with due diligence, through our content, the plurality of views and opinions reflected in our audience of Central and Southwest Virginia. Readers are strongly encouraged to verify information with programs and businesses directly. Parents are urged to thoroughly research any decisions involving their children. All rights reserved. material, including artwork, advertisements, and editorials, may not be reproduced without the expressed written consent of the publisher.

@roanokefamily

@rvfamilymag

/roanokevalleyfamily

DO YOU WANT YOUR CHILD ON THE COVER?

Send us a sample photo and contact info! jackie@virginiafamily.com

JULY VIRGINIAFAMILY.COM

inside departments 7 THE VALLEY

In the Neighborhood Things to Do Kids Eat Free

features

42 27

FREE-RANGE SUMMERS

Being a kid in an unplugged era

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GROWING UP Toddlers Kids Teens

61

HOW TO RAISE A BOY RIGHT

and keep your teen boy emotionally healthy

FAMILY Holiday Wellness

33

EDUCATION Rachel’s Reads Science

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JUST FOR FUN

Healthy Kids Recipe Science Experiment

the

valley. around town / things to do / kids eat free

JACKSON REED, 14, CLIMBS UP TO GET A B E T T E R V I E W O F T H E F I R E W O R K S AT THE RIVER’S EDGE SPORTS COMPLEX IN R O A N O K E , V A O N J U LY 4 , 2 0 1 8 .

the valley: around town

Roanoke is the All-American City!

The City of Roanoke has been named the first ever All-America City Hall of Fame Award winner! On June 7, the National Civic League bestowed the honor on the City — but that’s not the first time Roanoke has been honored by the League. So far, the City has been granted the All-America City Award seven times. While the All-America City Award “recognizes communities that leverage civic engagement, collaboration, inclusiveness and innovation to successfully address local issues,” the Hall of Fame Award celebrates a specific “outstanding civic engagement initiative” performed by the City.

Citizen Police Academy The next Citizen Police Academy will begin on Thursday, Aug. 1, at the Roanoke Police Academy (5401-B Barns Ave NW). The Academy provides an opportunity for citizens to become familiar with the day-to-day operations of the Police Department and gain a better understanding of the procedures, guidelines, responsibilities, policies, and laws that guide the Department’s decisions. Classes will meet from 6 to 9 p.m. in Room 216 at the Police Academy every Thursday night through Oct. 17; a light meal will be provided. There is no fee to participate, and you do not have to be a City resident. Participants must apply in advance at roanokeva.gov. Any questions may be directed to Investigator Anna Volk at 540-853-5441.

The initiative: Star City Reads, a community partnership that focuses on making sure all of Roanoke’s children can read proficiently by third grade.

But Star City Reads does not only serve to nourish the minds of young citizens — it also nourishes their bellies through the Feed and Read program.

The partnership notes that “children cannot retain or gain knowledge if they are too hungry to learn. At Feed and Read, children receive free USDA-approved meals and literacy instruction while they eat, so their brains and bodies are nourished.”

Great work, Roanoke City — the Hall of Fame Award is well-deserved!

Free summer meals for kids For many kids, summertime means food, friends, and fun. For families who count on school breakfast and lunch, however, the summer months can be stressful when family food budgets have to stretch even further. Free summer meals, funded by the USDA, are available to kids and teens ages 18 and younger at summer meals sites across Virginia.

Many summer meals sites offer fun learning and recreational activities so kids and teens can eat a healthy meal while staying active and being with friends. Sites are also registered with the USDA and are held at safe local places like schools and libraries.

No application or proof of income is needed. Simply bring your child to a summer meals site.

Breakfast & Lunch:

GW Carver Cafeteria • ALMS Cafeteria

Lunch Only:

Salem Commons • Ramey’s Trailer Park • Oak Park

Salem Public Library • Salem YMCA

If you have any questions, call Dr. Forest I. Jones at 540-3890130. We hope to see you this summer!

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Family/July 2019

New Roanoke County Public Library hours Bent Mountain branch: Mondays and Fridays, 1-5 p.m.

Tuesdays and Thursdays, 3-7 p.m.

Wednesdays, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Saturdays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

Sundays, Closed Glenvar branch: Mondays through Thursdays, 10 a.m.8 p.m.

Fridays and Saturdays, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Sundays, Closed Hollins branch: Mondays through Thursdays, 10 a.m.8 p.m.

Fridays and Saturdays, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Sundays, 1-5 p.m.

Mt. Pleasant branch: Mondays, 10 a.m.-6 p.m.

Tuesdays and Thursdays, 2-8 p.m.

Wednesdays, 2-6 p.m.

Fridays, 1-5 p.m.

Saturdays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

Sundays, Closed South County library: Mondays through Thursdays, 10 a.m.8 p.m.

Fridays, 10 a.m.-6 p.m.

Saturdays, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Sundays, 1-5 p.m.

Vinton branch: Mondays through Thursdays, 10 a.m.8 p.m.

Fridays and Saturdays, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.

Sundays, 1-5 p.m

Fallon Park Update It’s a busy summer at Fallon Park Elementary, as construction crews continue work on Phase 2 of the new school. Right now, crews are installing the electrical, mechanical, and plumbing, and soon will install the roof.

Phase 2 includes a new cafeteria, administrative offices, and a two-story wing with 13 additional classrooms.

This phase is scheduled to be completed by December 2019. The school estimates that staff and students will occupy the building after they return from Winter Break.

Second graders moved into Phase 1 at the beginning of March. The new academic building houses 26 classrooms. The building includes spacious classrooms, state-of-the-art technology, and spectacular views — especially in the media center.

Phase 3 includes the demolition of the existing school building, the construction of the new bus loop, the renovation of the existing gym, and the conversion of the existing cafeteria into an art and music center. Phase 3 is scheduled to be completed in the summer of 2020.

Vinton Kroger getting remodel Kroger plans to invest more than $3.7 million at its Vinton store, located at 915 Hardy Rd. The grocer is thrilled to bring customers what will be a fully updated store, and will be hiring approximately 20 employees as part of the remodel, which is slated to finish in the fall.

“We’re excited to bring a fresh look and feel to our customers and we thank them for their patience during the renovation process,” said Bruce Molnar, Vinton store manager.

“The changes coming are not only functional, but fun — and we can’t wait for everyone to see what essentially will be a brand-new store.”

The remodel is part of Kroger’s initiative to reorganize stores more efficiently and bring more organic food choices to customers. Highlights of the renovation include the addition of a full-service Starbucks, updated sushi offerings, a complete renovation of restrooms, and upgrades to the overall décor of the store. It will also bring a growler bar with additional wine and beer options. The growler bar will feature 12 beer taps and 16 wine varieties for sale by the glass or for tastings. Kroger will also sell growlers at the bar, filled on site.

The Vinton store will remain open to the public during the renovation process.

Family/July 2019

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One in seven children won’t be ready to start kindergarten.*

Don’t let your child be the one.

For more information, contact: Smart Beginnings Greater Roanoke sbgr@uwrv.org | (540) 283-2778 smartbeginningsroanoke.org

®

*The Annie E. Casey Foundation: KIDS COUNT Data Center.

(2010). PALS-K Scores.

the valley: around town to seven,” she said. “That’s terrible mom hours.”

So, even though she loved the work, Sarah left her position at the library. She’d had experience in the classroom before, traveling from school to school in her previous job with the Blue Ridge Soil and Water Conservation District, and had adored teaching children. The choice was easy to make: Sarah combined her passions of the library, books, teaching, and kids, and decided that being a school librarian was the perfect job for her.

Educator of the Month

Sarah Gleiner-Scott Walk down the hallways of any school in the Valley; behind each door that lines those corridors, young minds are drinking in knowledge as it’s deftly imparted by hardworking educators. Those classrooms are home to students for much of their school day, but there’s another space our kids learn, too — and it’s possibly the most important space in the entire building: the library.

The library is a classroom unlike any other, and the school librarian is an educator with a unique opportunity. The librarian gets to teach and form relationships with every single student in the school. Sarah GleinerScott, the tireless librarian of Penn Forest Elementary School, is recognized as the Grand Home Furnishings educator of the month!

Sarah — Ms. Gleiner-Scott to the kids — became Penn Forest’s librarian six years ago, but that wasn’t her first time working in the world of books. Sarah had been a librarian at Salem Public Library, but at the time, she’d had a young child and another on the way. “The hours were three

There are often misconceptions about the school librarian’s role. In Roanoke County elementary schools, library — as a class — is a special, like music and art. The kids come to Sarah for a class period, and she spends that time teaching them — sometimes about topics that support what they’re learning in other classes, sometimes about something completely different. “For instance,” she said, “Every year, the first graders have to learn about maps, so I have them create a bird’s eye map of the library. They work together and brainstorm using a key I put up on the active board.”

“Checking out books is a huge part of our job, and it’s great, but we’re doing a whole lot more,” said Sarah. “In the County, at least, we like to be called ‘teacher-librarians.’ We’re making lesson plans, we’re turning kids on to reading.”

and was always outside, in the creeks or climbing trees. My mom would have to make me come inside to do my homework.”

It wasn’t until she went to college that she realized how wonderful reading is.

“It was stuff I was assigned in college, like Fahrenheit 451 and The Great Gatsby — I loved those, and reading them led me to other books.”

When she got to Penn Forest, Sarah noticed right away that there was a lack of graphic novels in the library’s collection. “I sunk a ton of money that first year into graphic novels, and now we’ve got four shelves of them. What’s great about that is reluctant readers will read those —the pictures make the reading less intimidating.”

She also started morning check-out when she started at Penn Forest. “I see the kids once every six days for library classes, and for your avid readers, that’s too long to wait for a new book.”

Children’s author Judy Blume said, “Librarians save lives by handing the right book at the right time to a kid in need.”

Sarah Gleiner-Scott changes lives every day, bringing enthusiasm and an excitement for reading into each of her library classes.

That’s why we are proud to call her the teacher of the month!

Another of Sarah’s favorite lessons is the one she does with fifth graders near the end of the year. “It’s SOL time, and they’re stressed out from all the testing, so I do an ‘I Spy’ class.” First, the kids watch a video about how the iconic I Spy books are made, and then they spend the next three weeks creating their own “I Spy” pages using images Sarah has ready for them, as well as ones the students bring from home.

One thing she hasn’t done is “leveled” the books in the library. In their regular classes, students have different levels of reading. “I haven’t done that, nor do I want to, because my whole job is to help kids learn to love reading, not to assign them something at their level.”

And, of course, she loves to read to the students, young and old alike.

It would likely come as a surprise to her students, though, that Sarah didn’t always appreciate reading. When she was a kid, she said, she didn’t spend time reading.

“I grew up on a farm in Franklin County

Most popular books at Penn Forest: The Dog Man series by Dav Pilkey.

Runners-up: Garfield, Calvin and Hobbes, and Harry Potter books.

“I love that Harry Potter has stood the test of time. I always ask, ‘Is this your first time reading it? Oh, you’re in for a treat.’ Then I have them come back when they’re done and tell me which book was their favorite.”

Sarah’s favorite genre: Medieval fantasy.

Sarah’s favorite book of all time: The Giver, by Lois Lowery.

What she’s reading right now: The Maze Runner by James Dashner.

Also, a nonfiction book called Girl Rising by Tanya Lee Stone. AND another YA novel: Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe. “It won all kinds of awards, so I just had to read it!”

is proud to sponsor the

TEACHER MONTH of the

The winning teacher receives a $100 gift card from Grand Home Furnishings!

www.grandhomefurnishings.com Valley View | Tanglewood | Christiansburg | Lynchburg Family/July 2019

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the valley: around town

Hard Hats Give Way to Bike Helmets at Newly Constructed Park

by Erica Corder

Few locations in the valley offer a way to hone skills needed on the trails for the novice and the skilled mountain biker alike — until now.

The Blacksburg Rotary Mountain Biking Skills Park, opening this summer in Blacksburg, will provide a course complete with obstacles, jumps, and varied terrain for bikers

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Family/July 2019

to sharpen skills without hitting the often steep and narrow trails. Located near Heritage Park and the Gateway Trail, the new development will be a destination for safe mountain biking training and, in the future, educational camps and demonstrations.

month. Thanks largely to funding by the Town of Blacksburg, local businesses, and community donors, the basic dirt park will host a climbing trail and beginner and intermediate trails on a downslope, featuring ramps and undulating bumps, known as rollers.

The first phase of the park’s construction will be complete this

But Blacksburg Parks and Recreation doesn’t intend to stop there. Director

Dean Crane is looking at a long term vision that would involve the creation of more advanced trails.

“One of the things that we really wanted with the skills park was to create it kind of like a ski slope,” Crane said. “If you’re brand new, you go down the bunny slope, right?

You don’t go down the double black diamond the first time. If you do, that’d be your last time.”

The mountain biking equivalent of the black diamond slopes may be built in the coming months, after the new park has time to grow in and riders can practice. For now, skilled bikers can make the existing course more challenging by adjusting their speed and tactics.

Within the next six months, Crane plans to add boulders and gravel or other obstacles like fallen trees that riders can expect on trails.

After another round of fundraising, Crane also hopes to bring contractors back out to the site to add in more advanced trails within the four acres where the original park is located.

But this is a small part of what is ultimately a larger plan to create a unique destination for outdoor enthusiasts. Currently, the town has built the park on a parcel of land owned by local preservation group Friends of the Huckleberry Trail.

In the fall, Crane expects a gift to come online from the New River Land Trust, which will provide the town with two parcels of land near the skills park. The hope would be to connect the newly-acquired 550 acres to Heritage Park, the Huckleberry Trail, and trails at Pandapas Pond, thereby creating a loop of outdoor activities like mountain biking, horseback riding, trail jogging, bird watching, and hiking.

“That’s a longer term dream of ours,” Crane said.

Luckily, Crane and his team move quick. After learning about the burgeoning high school and middle school mountain biking teams and seeing a need, Crane and his team envisioned a concept for a mountain biking skills park back in spring of 2016.

They submitted grant applications to the Virginia Department of Conservation and Recreation but were waitlisted. By the time they were put onto the list of approved projects, regulations on site inspections and required paperwork had changed, meaning the Town would have had to add a full-time position on the project, not accounted for in their initial $300,000 grant application.

“So the town said, ‘We’re not going to go through this process. You know what, we’ll do it right. We’ll do it small. We’ll deal with $50,000 and get basically the same product,’” Crane said.

They set to work. They sold T-shirts, made a percentage off beer sales, recruited sponsorships from local businesses and organizations, started an Indiegogo crowdfunding campaign, hosted a film festival sponsored by local restaurant Cabo Fish Taco, and sold the naming rights to the Rotary Club of Blacksburg. The town pitched in the final $15,000 needed to hit the fundraising goal. With that, the town hired contractors who started construction in April to minimize land disturbance.

As construction wraps in July, Crane is looking forward to seeing the response from the community as they start to visit the free park. Volunteers will maintain the unsupervised park, which will be open daily from dawn until dark.

If it’s anything like the skate park Crane was involved in creating in Blacksburg over a decade ago, he thinks it’ll be a success.

“I know we built a good skate park when it snows and the kids come with shovels, to take the snow out of the skateboard park so they can skate.

Because it’s theirs,” Crane said. “I know that that is meeting the need.

And I think the same with this.”

For the latest information on their opening date and upcoming events, check the Blacksburg Rotary Mountain Biking Skills Park’s website at blacksburgmtbpark.org.

5 tips for new bikers 1. Prep Make sure your child is comfortable riding their bike on easy surfaces.

Look for simple and short trails to introduce your family to off-road biking.

2. Equipment Their bike should be properly sized to their height and weight.

Experts at bike repair and rental shops are often happy to help!

3. Visit a bike park!

Bike parks can allow you to get used to bumps, banks and turns without being up on a mountain.

New riders can get used to jumps and different surface material.

4. Increase the difficulty As your young rider starts to feel more and more comfortable, you can add more to your bike trips.

If you know a trail as a hazard they haven’t ridden before, practice similar experiences at your local bike park first.

5. Manage expectations Let your kid know that mountain biking comes with bumps and bruises.

They WILL fall. Their bike will need repairs on the mountain and protective gear may be cumbersome to pack but is necessary.

Family/July 2019

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the valley: around town

Rating Area Restrooms on a Five TP-Roll Scale

by Georgianne Vecellio

It can be rough when you have a list of errands to do and a bunch of places to go, and you suddenly need to add a restroom to your list. Or worse, when a panicky little voice lets you know that nature is calling. (I used to carry a potty chair in my car for such emergencies when my daughter was potty training, but after a certain age, that’s just uncool.)

With four locations around the Roanoke Valley, Sheetz has you covered.

Recently, I stopped in to two of them the do some investigating: Sheetz #295 (2703 Peters Creek Road) and Sheetz #300 (1212 Williamson Road NE).

The restrooms in most Sheetz locations are similar, if not identical. The typical restroom features three stalls — two standard, one handicappedaccessible — with auto-flush toilets and hooks on the doors. You will find a changing station in the accessible stall. Dual sinks with wall-mounted soap dispensers, air dryers as well as paper towels, and a trash can next to the door are the norm. There is nothing exciting in their décor:

soft light, neutral colors, and a lack of adornment, but, like Target’s restrooms, this is a high-traffic area; no distractions, just keep moving.

When I stopped at the Williamson Road location, I noticed that the restroom is the same as all the other Sheetz restrooms I had used, but discovered that the Peters Creek location is smaller. There are only two stalls (one of which is handicapped-accessible) and two sinks. On that particular day, the Peters Creek location had not been well maintained, with a clogged toilet in the accessible stall and trash on the floor. (I’m hoping that was an anomaly and that they were short-staffed that day.)

A common denominator in Sheetz’s restrooms is the fragrance. There is always a strong, industrial-strength soap smell. I have noticed it in every single Sheetz I’ve been in. I’m not a fan of strong chemicals, but I have come to associate that smell with clean, disinfected restrooms. While the Peters Creek restroom was on the messy side, it still smelled clean.

Last month, I mentioned how it’s not cool to enter a business with the sole purpose of using their restrooms. In other words, restrooms should be for paying customers. That doesn’t apply at Sheetz. First of all, any Sheetz location is usually busy, even outside of rush hour, with people buying gas, coffee, prepared food, snacks, or other random necessities. The employees have more to do than police who uses their restrooms. But have you ever noticed that, in order to get to their restrooms, you have to make your way past shelves of merchandise, coolers, or the food ordering station? That’s the payoff — feel free to use the facilities, but be enticed by everything else Sheetz has to offer on your way there. Honestly, that’s a pretty fair trade-off for a clean place to take care of business. Even a messy Sheetz restroom is a better option than what you will find at many other gas stations.

The verdict: Sheetz #300 (Williamson) gets 4.5 toilet paper rolls, and #295 (Peters Creek) gets 4.

Call us today and schedule your

Kindergarten Entrance Exam Call (540) 344-9213 for information about Kindergarten and School Entrance Exams

at our Roanoke and Westlake locations

Learn about our services & providers at physicianstochildren.com

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Family/July 2019

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KEEP COOL BY THE POOL! Check out our new line of customized tumblers!

We invite you to stop by and browse Roanoke’s LARGEST selection of premium & natural pet foods, USA made dog toys & treats, dog & cat supplies, wildbird care items, organic chicken feed, & gifts for the whole family!

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things to do

JULY Things to do Ongoing events Salem Fair

Salem Civic Center July 3 through July 14 salemfair.com

Free gate admission and live entertainment. Great fair food and carnival rides! Check website for specials! Weekdays: 4pm-11pm Weekends: Noon–11pm.

FREE!

Kids Summer Matinee Series Grandin Theatre Friday & Saturdays, 10am

Come enjoy a free family morning at the silver screen! July 5&6: Hanna Barbera Cartoons. July 19&20: The Rugrats Movie. July 26&27: Superheroes.

Party In Elmwood Elmwood Park in Roanoke Thursdays, 5:30pm-8:30pm downtownroanoke.org

Join us for all of your favorite bands and jams! Enjoy music, friends, food, and drinks. Bring your lawn chair and

Celebrating America: Opening Night September 28 • 7:30 PM

Berglund Performing Arts Theatre

Mozart & Strauss Celebration November 16 • 7:30 PM November 17 • 3:00 PM Shaftman Performance Hall

tickets and information at rso.com

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Family/July 2019

relax in Elmwood Park. No coolers, please. The Best Beach Party in the Valley is in Elmwood Park every Thursday night! Admission is $5 per person at the gate. Kids under 12 are free!

Art Gone Wild

Mill Mountain Zoo Friday, July 12 from 10-12pm* Saturday, July 20 from 111pm** mmzoo.org Does your child like animals? Does your child also like art? Why not combine the two together?!? This 2 hour class will give children the opportunity to use the zoo’s residents as inspiration for fun, colorful and unique art projects. Painting, 3-dimensional work and multi-media projects are just a few of the possible, critter-themed activities children will have a chance to participate in. $15 for member child. $20 for non-member child * Designed for Ages 8-12

**Designed for Ages 6-9

Crafting in the Afternoon Explore Park Saturday, July 13, 2:30pm Saturday, July 27, 2:30pm roanokecountyparks.com (540) 427-1800

Spend an afternoon with a National Park Ranger making nature crafts and reading books. One hour program; topics will vary. Check website, social

media, or call us for the week’s program details. Indoors at the Visitor Center.

Animal Enrichment Fun Mill Mountain Zoo Friday, July 19, 2-4pm* Saturday, July 20, 2-4pm** mmzoo.org

A lot goes into taking good care of the animals at the zoo. Besides feeding and cleaning, keepers also need to find creative ways to entertain the zoo’s residents. This is called enrichment, and if you sign up for this class, you can help create some! Not only that, you’ll get to see the animals enjoy their enrichments at the end of the program. $15 for member child. $20 for non-member child * Designed for Ages 12-16

she’ll have to meet a prince, defy her father, and strike up a deal with an evil sea witch! Classic songs like “Part of Your World”, “Poor Unfortunate Souls”, “Kiss the Girl” and more appear in this one-hour version of the story we all know and love. This fully produced production featuring local youth is perfect for the whole family. In conjunction with this production, MMT will distribute free books to children in attendance, as part of our initiative connecting theatre to literacy. Tickets start at $15.

July 8 FREE!

Galaxy Jars Craft

2pm at the South County Library Create your own galaxy! Bring your own jar.

**Designed for Ages 8-12

Little Mermaid Jr. Mill Mountain Theatre July 31 through August 11 millmountain.org

Journey under the sea with Ariel and her friends in Disney’s The Little Mermaid JR. In a magical underwater utopia, mermaid Ariel’s only wish is to live on land. But first

July 9 FREE!

Planet Pillows Craft

4pm at the Vinton Library Fun craft for a summer afternoon! Ideal for ages 7+.

Date Night Ideas Party In Elmwood Thursdays, 5:30pm

Elmwood Park, Roanoke downtownroanoke.org

Grandin Chillage July 26, 6:00pm

Grandin Village http://historicgrandinvillage.com Family/July 2019

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things to do

July 11 FREE!

Furry Neighbors

7pm at Longwood Park in Salem

Meet some animals ambassadors and learn about common issues with SWVA Wildlife Center.

July 12

Fleetwood Mac Tribute: Rumours

FREE!

Movies in the Market 6pm at the Roanoke Market Square

Enjoy FREE, family-friendly entertainment in Market Square! Bring a blanket or lawn chair, some snacks or stop by a great Downtown restaurants for something to eat! A concessionaire will also be on site. The movie begins at dusk, with FREE kids activities beginning around 6:00pm. Mary Poppins Returns is rated: PG.

Family/July 2019

Movies in the Park Bring a blanket and chairs and enjoy a movie under the stars!! Admission is FREE, and FunTimes will bring inflatables for the kids. There will also be a concessions stand selling food.

Movie starts a dusk.

5:30pm at the Bent Mountain Library

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FREE!

6pm at Dr. Pepper Park drpepperpark.com

Rumours has meticulously put together a show that spares no detail.

Recreating the band’s legendary persona, in all it’s youthful glory from 1975-1987.From period accurate equipment and costumes to spot on characterizations and musical performances, Rumours takes you back to a time when music was still an unbridled cultural experience and bands weren’t afraid to put on a

show. Relive the rock and roll magic with Rumours. Event venue is cash only. Bring your own or rent chairs at the event. Adults tickets are $15 IN ADVANCE and $18 day of show. Kids 12 and under are FREE and do not require a ticket.

July 19 Salem After Five

5pm at the Salem Farmers’ Market (540) 375-3057

food, drinks, rollerblades, skateboards, and pets are not allowed on the premises.

Family Festival in the Park 2019

FREE!

Feeding America SWVA Food Truck Fest

5 pm-9 pm at the Vinton Farmer’s Market

This month, come out and see the Blackwater Band perform on the Salem Farmers’ Market stage. Gates open at 5 p.m., the music starts at 6, and all proceeds benefit Slam Duncan’s Children’s Charity. This month’s food truck is Chick-fil-A! The Kettle Cooker Express and Salem Ice Cream Parlor will also be there. Adult tickets are $5, children 12 and under are FREE. There will be a children’s play area set up in the Market. Coolers, outside

FREE!

Incredible evening of food, music, beverages, and fun! Enjoy multiple food trucks, craft beer, live music on the Farmers Market Stage, kids activities, and more, with FREE entry-and of course, vendors will have incredible food and beverage options for purchase!

4:30pm-9:30pm at Randolph Park in Dublin

Building Bridges Child Development Center is excited to announce our first annual Family Festival in the Park. Join us for an evening of learning, growth, fun and activities. Entrance to the festival is FREE! Family Night Swim at Randolph Park Pool will be $3 per person. You don’t want to miss out on this fun family event!

MARKET

FREE MOVIES

Market Square - Downtown Roanoke

May 10 - Incredibles 2 June 14 - Bumblebee July 12 - Mary Poppins Returns Aug 9 - E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial Pre-Show Activities 6pm Movies begin at Dusk

Details at DowntownRoanoke.org!

Family/July 2019

19

things to do

YAYfor the USA! 36th Annual Independence Day Fireworks at Buchanan Festival Community Carnival & Franklin County High School • July 1, 5pm Buchanan 4th of July Parade There will be live music, food, inflatables and various children’s activities, and fireworks will begin at dark.

Roanoke’s Fireworks on the Fourth

The Buchanan Community Carnival is a quintessential small town summer experience, particularly on the 4th of July! The fireworks show at 10:00 p.m. There will also be a second fireworks display on Saturday, July 6, at 10:00 pm

Festivities begin with live music, kids activities, and food trucks, and the fireworks show goes from 9:15 to 9:45 pm

Vinton Fourth of July Celebration

River’s Edge Sports Complex • July 4, 7pm

Fireworks at Salem Fair Salem Civic Center • July 4, 4pm

The Salem Fair is a great spot to watch fireworks on the 4th of July. Gates open at 4:00 pm and the fireworks begin at approximately 9:30pm

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Buchanan Town Park • July 4, 11am-11pm

Family/July 2019

Vinton War Memorial • July 4, 6pm

Take part in the Town of Vinton’s 4th of July celebration by grabbing a spot on the lawn at the Vinton War Memorial and spending the evening in a beautiful setting; the fireworks show at 9:30 pm

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July 20 Pawpalooza Parade 9am at Highland Park in Roanoke runsignup.com/Race/VA/Roanoke/ PawpaloozaParade

Calling all dogs and pet supporters to join us for the Pawpalooza Parade and other dog related activities. The events following the parade will be held in the Highland Park fields and range from demos to informational sessions, dog adoptions, and more.

Plus, if you think you have a disc dog, put your combined skills to the test and compete for prizes and dog glory in the Pawpalooza Disc Dog Cup! While everyone is welcome to attend, there is a registration fee for parade participates. 100% of the proceeds go to the animals at Angels of Assisi.

Breakfast with the Animals

8:30am-10:30am at Mill Mountain Zoo Join Mill Mountain Zoo for a light breakfast buffet and meet one of the zoo’s education outreach animals.

Followed by a special chat with zookeepers as you get amazed with more fun and educational facts about our animal residents. An intimate experience to learn more about various animals’ diets, behavior and personalities. Plus, there will be a child-focused activity. Guests will have Treats with Turtles and Tortoises. Cost $11-$18.

FREE!

Pirate Festival

11am-9pm at the Crazy Horse Marina in Moneta crazyhorse-marina.com Free Admission, Craft and Food Vendors, Live Music and best of all MERMAIDS and PIRATES!

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Family/July 2019

Jazz in July

3pm-9:30pm at Longwood Park in Salem.

Bring your chairs, a blanket, and a picnic and join us for some of the area’s best jazz music! Snacks will be available to purchase from Kettle Cooker Express.

Apollo 11 Moon Landing 50th Anniversary

9:30am-5:30pm at the Radford University Planetarium radford.edu/planetarium At 3:17pm EST on Sunday, July 20, 1969, the Eagle landed on our moon, one of humanity’s greatest achievements, when we truly ventured from our home on our pale, blue dot. Come join us as we celebrate the 50th anniversary of this momentous occasion on Saturday, July 20.

This celebration will be like our 2017 Eclipse Event in that there will be planetarium shows and many other activities throughout the day, and everyone is invited. Mark your calendars now.

August 2-3 Big Lick Comic Con Berglund Center biglickcomiccon.com

Featuring 50,000 square feet of exhibitors with comics, gaming, toys, collectors, creators, artists, gaming, cosplay, food truck & craft beverage experience, day specific entertainment and more. Plus of course our incredible celebrity guests including the Guest of Honor: Sean Astin of the Goonies, Lord of the Rings, Rudy, Stranger Things & more!

Tickets start at $15 per person. Kids 10 and under are free to attend. First 500 patrons on Saturday receive a free goody bag!

Disney's The Little Mermaid Jr

July 31 - August 11

On the Trinkle MainStage

One-Hour Version "Part of That World", "Under The Sea", "Kiss the Girl", "Poor Unfortunate Souls", and more!

Get Your Tickets!

540-342-5740 millmountain.org

A Peter Rabbit Tale: A Children's Musical

Sean Astin will be the Guest of Honor at the Big Lick Comic Con this year!

FREE

June 1 - July 13 FREE show touring the Roanoke Valley Performance Schedule:

millmountain.org/peter-rabbit

Family/July 2019

23

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can Re a l A me r i or N i nj a Wa r r i Op e n !

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Family/July 2019

Monday

• The Green Goat All Day • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult 802 Wiley Dr. SW, Roanoke (540) 904-6091

• Mama Maria’s 11 AM - 2 PM • 3 & under free buffet with paid adult W. Main St., Salem (540) 389-2848

• Country Cookin’ 4 PM - Close • 10 & under, 2 children per paid adult All Locations in Roanoke (540) 774-0199

• Golden Corral All Day • 3 & under free buffet with paid adult 1441 Towne Square Blvd., Roanoke (540) 563-8826

• Famous Anthony’s 3 PM - Close • 1 child per paid adult All Locations in Roanoke, Salem, & Vinton (540) 362-1400

• Denny’s 4 PM - 10 PM • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult All Locations Roanoke & Salem (540) 389-5074

IHop 4PM-10PM • 12 & Under All Locations

• Buffalo Wild Wings 4 PM - 9 PM • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult All Locations (540) 725-9464

• Macado’s 4 PM - 9 PM • 12 & under, $1 child meal per paid adult All Locations in Roanoke & Salem (540) 776-9884

• Shoney’s All Day • 4 & under, free kids meal with adult entree purchase. Drink not included 2673 Lee Highway, Troutville (540) 992-6400

• El Rio Mexican Grill All Day • 10 & under, 1 child per paid adult 4208 Electric Rd., Roanoke (540) 685-4343 • Firehouse Subs All Day • 11 & under, 2 children per paid adult combo,dine in Blacksburg (540) 961-0371

Tuesday

• McAlister’s Deli 5 PM - Close • 2 children per paid adult 2063 Colonial Ave., Roanoke (540) 204-4407 • Town Center Tap House All Day • 12 & under, 2 children per paid adult

90 Town Center St., Daleville (540) 591-9991 • Firehouse Subs All Day • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult Colonial Ave, Town Square & Salem only (540) 345-3131 • Pizza Hut 5 PM - Close • 10 & under, free buffet per paid adult 1016 Hershberger Rd., Roanoke (540) 362-3834 • Ruby Tuesday 5 PM - Close • 11 & under, 1 child per paid adult Electric Rd., Roanoke (540) 265-9301 • K&W All Day • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult Hershberger Rd. Roanoke (540) 563-4977

Wednesday • Dogwood 4 PM - Close • 10 & under, per paid adult 106 E. Lee Ave., Vinton (540) 343-6549 • The Quarter All Day • 12 & under, 1 child per paid adult 19 Salem Ave., Roanoke (540) 342-2990

Thursday • CiCi’s Pizza All Day • 10 & under .99 cents child buffet per adult buffet Roanoke (540) 344-7711 • The Roanoker 4:30 PM - Close • 10 & under, 2 children per paid adult 2522 Colonial Ave., Roanoke (540) 344-7746

• Jerry’s Family Restaurant 4 PM - Close • 6 & under, 1 child per adult meal purchase 1340 E. Washington Ave., Vinton (540) 343-4400

Friday See Everyday Deals!

Saturday • Tokyo Express 11 AM - 3 PM • 4 & under free buffet per paid adult 1940 W Main St., Salem (540) 389-6303 • Famous Anthony’s 12 PM - Close • 1 child per adult meal All Locations Roanoke, Salem, Vinton (540) 362-1400

• Firehouse Subs All Day • 12 and Under 1 free per paid adult Keagy Road, Roanoke 540-204-4471 • O’Charley’s All Day • 10 and Under 1 free per paid adult Valley View, Roanoke 540-563-9870 • Rodeo Grande All Day • 12 and Under 1 free per paid adult Valley View, Roanoke 540-206-2296 • Lew’s Restaurant SW All Day • 12 and Under 2 free per paid adult Walnut Avenue, Roanoke 540-682-5925

Sunday • Pizza Den 5 PM - 8:30 PM • 10 & under free buffet per paid adult buffet and drink purchase Salem (540) 389-1111

Trampolines

& More!

Basketball Dodgeball Jousting Pit Fidget Ladder Airbag Pit Launch Tower Arcade with prizes Bumper cars Flight Training Wall NEW! American Ninja Warrior Course Snack Bar 5 Party Rooms

• Local Roots 5 PM -7 PM • 5 & under eat for free, discount for ages 5-7 per paid adult 1314 Grandin Rd., Roanoke (540) 206-2610 • T.G.I.Fridays All Day • 12 & under 1 with paying adult 4869 Valley View Blvd., Roanoke (540) 362-1475 • Jimmy V’s Restaurant All Day • 4 & under kids meal only $2.50 3403 Brandon Ave., Roanoke (540) 345-7311 • Moe’s Southwestern Grill All Day • 1 free per paid adult All Roanoke & Blacksburg locations

Roanoke Valley Family Magazine publishes these deals for informational purposes only. A Listing here does not guarantee a discount at any of the mentioned restaurants.

Promotions often change without notice and we recommend calling the restaurant to confirm any discount before arrival.

Family/July 2019

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How to Raise a Boy Right (and Keep Your Teen Boy Emotionally Healthy)

by Jennifer Wilson

We all want to raise our boys right.

“Right” is subjective, though; we might all have different ideas of what that means. Here’s what it means to me (perhaps we have some common ground here): I want my boys to be physically healthy. I want to give my kids the resources to learn and to be resourceful and resilient. I want to raise polite and respectful kids.

And I want them to be emotionally healthy. To me, this means the ability to maintain healthy relationships and to feel and express the rainbow of emotions, to truly live a full and rich life.

I worry about the emotional health of my boys. They’re both growing up so fast (my oldest son is 14 and my youngest is 10). I have so many questions as my teenager is racing

toward adulthood. How can I get a better understanding of what he’s going through so that I can best support him? How can I ensure that he knows that we love and support him?

How can I encourage him to express his feelings and not hold them back?

I read a book called Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys

by Dan Kindlon, Ph.D. and Michael Thompson, Ph.D. In their introduction, the authors write, “We want to help people who love boys — their parents, teachers, and mentors — to see past the opaque surface of boys’ lives to their inner lives. Their joy and their struggles. We want you — our reader — to understand the ways boys suffer and what causes them emotional pain.

It is vital that parents and teachers not take boys at face value, even though

they sometimes insist, furiously, that we do so.” And I was hooked.

If you’re a parent of an adolescent boy and would like a roadmap of how to raise your son to be emotionally healthy, consider this book your starting point.

Let me tell you what I learned.

How Culture Teaches Us to Raise a Boy to Be a Man First, let’s examine how our culture shapes what it means to “be a man.”

This is important, because our culture influences the way we interact with our sons, the way our boys interact with one another, and how they feel on the “inside.”

Family/July 2019

27

Teach boys that there are many ways to be a man.

Celebrate the differences.

Let him know there are so many ways for him to be a man — not just the strong, unflinching, stoic, superhero male stereotype.

In our society, boys are supposed to be strong and confident. Because of this, we believe that boys aren’t emotional, sensitive, or needy.

Our boys learn that masculine emotions, such as anger and aggression, are okay, while other emotions (especially fear) are hidden and silenced. They learn that stereotypical feminine traits, such as “tenderness, empathy, compassion, and any show of emotional vulnerability” aren’t to be freely expressed.

I remember picking up my oldest son from school when he was in the fourth grade. It was his birthday — he had turned eight that day. I was so excited to hear about his special day, but it was obvious that he was upset. I asked him to tell me what happened and what he was feeling, but all he could do was sit there, looking sad, and say, “Nothing.”

It took him a while to finally open up and tell me what had happened — his favorite teacher had gotten impatient with him about something for which another student was to blame and had raised her voice at him. He was deeply hurt because he loved this teacher and her approval was important to him. Yet, he was reluctant to express his sadness and hurt. This is real life for a boy. From an early age, they struggle to open up and talk about their feelings.

Many boys don’t understand their feelings and have trouble expressing their emotions because society tells them that they are stoic, strong, and silent. To cope with and downplay their emotions, boys use “shields of various forms to keep others away: irritability, sarcasm, nonchalance, stoicism, and others.”

“A boy lives in a narrowly defined world of developing masculinity, in which everything he does or thinks is judged on the basis of the strength or weakness it represents; you are either strong and worthwhile, or weak and worthless.”

At its simplest, boys must always appear strong and in control, and must never appear weak, emotional, or vulnerable. As a result, boys learn to downplay, hide, or silence their fears, sadness, and vulnerability.

But all of this doesn’t mean that a boy doesn’t experience strong

feelings. He does. He just has trouble expressing them.

So how can we help our boys out of their emotional straightjacket?

Recognize the cultural stereotypes that our boys are raised in and how this causes boys to shut down their societally unacceptable (“feminine”) emotions.

If you know something is troubling your son, don’t brush it off (even if he urges you to). Spend the time and effort to find out what the issue is and what he’s feeling.

Give him permission to experience and express the full spectrum of human emotions. Allow him to be open about his feelings.

Be respectful of his feelings.

How Harsh Discipline Can Backfire With Boys There is a correlation between harsher discipline and children’s physical misbehavior (as opposed to talking back). Because boys are generally more active and physical, they are on the receiving end of a more severe disciplinary style. This, coupled with the fact that we believe we have to “toughen up” our boys, cause us to use power, fear, and intimidation as disciplinary tactics. Do these tactics work?

They might seem to work. But the Raising Cain authors caution that success with this approach is shortterm and has a greater likelihood of backfiring. The end result is that boys subjected to this type of discipline learn to make decisions based on external forces — what their parents or teachers expect. They don’t learn to use their internal compass as a guide.

When our boys do something we don’t like, we react angrily because we’re upset. But we’re also trying to teach them a lesson. We are angry, and therefore, don’t do it again, because what you did was dangerous, stupid, etc. Remember, though, that to our kids, we are larger than life. So when we react with intense anger, our boys are more likely to remember the emotional nuances of the moment: how your face looked when you were yelling, the power of your anger, where he was, and how he felt. And that’s

not necessarily what we had intended; it isn’t the fear that we want them to remember, it’s the lesson.

The takeaway: If you typically use anger and fear as disciplinary tactics, realize that your son will remember the fury far more than the reason you were upset in the first place. Reflect upon your disciplinary style and make adjustments if they’re unduly harsh.

What can we do?

Use consistent, clear, and firm discipline.

Demonstrate compassion while disciplining.

Model the desired behavior in your interactions with others.

Engage your son in the discussion as opposed to reacting with anger.

“Good discipline engages a child, encourages contact instead of isolation, draws him into the discussion instead of sending him away. It involves the boy as consultant.”

How Fathers Can Bond With

Their Teenage Sons: Improving Father-Son Relationships

opinion of them carries enormous weight.”

It probably goes without saying that a father’s involvement in his son’s life is important. In fact, Raising Cain cites research that the father’s role in child care is most influential in developing a boys’ emotional education and empathy.

And, therefore, “A boy wants a father who thinks he is fantastic — one who knows that he is still little and cannot do everything well but loves him anyway.”

In early childhood, fathers will engage with their young sons in a much different way than mothers.

The father is usually more active, playful, and rougher than the mother.

Fathers, rejoice! Your active style of parenting has proven to be extremely important in building a strong fatherson relationship.

However, when things don’t go according to plan or if boys misbehave, fathers should be mindful of unrelenting criticism of their young sons and shouldn’t withhold praise as punishment. The authors state that doing so causes deep wounds that last well into adulthood.

“In the early years, when they are rank beginners at so much, their father’s

In middle childhood, a boy watches and absorbs his father’s interactions with others, how he resolves conflict and conducts himself as a partner at home and at work. Because our boys learn from observing, fathers should try to be the model of manhood they want their sons to become.

Because his father’s approval is so important, a boy will seek his father’s advice. Instead of only doling out advice, however, or talking about his adult opinions, a father should consider and respect his son’s opinions and feelings, as well. If boys are made to feel like they don’t matter, they won’t share their feelings with their fathers. Sadly, this is all too common.

Of all the close relationships in a boy’s life, research shows he is least likely to share his life with his father.

The takeaway here: start showing your

adolescent son respect for his opinions, as it may encourage him to share his life with you and bring you closer together.

To drive this point home, the authors of Raising Cain outlined a study of 300 corporate male executives and managers. They were asked about the single thing they would change about their childhood relationship with their fathers. The most common response?

They wished they had been closer to their fathers growing up, and they wished their fathers had expressed more emotion and feelings.

A boy’s withdrawal in the teen years causes many fathers to believe their sons don’t want their love or attention.

There is nothing further from the truth; boys still need and want their fathers’ attention, approval, and love.

What can fathers do to strengthen their relationship with their teenage sons?

Celebrate your son’s individual accomplishments. Celebrate him for who he is, not how he measures up to others. Don’t push him to compete in something for you. Tell him that he’s fabulous just as he is.

“More fathers need to communicate more often to their all-too-flawed sons the simple message that they are loved and valued”.

As your son gets older, ask for his opinion and listen to what he has to say. Try not to judge his teenage boy feelings and opinions through your adult lens. Validate his opinions instead. If all you do is voice your own opinions, he’ll feel like he doesn’t matter and he’ll be less likely to share his life with you.

Model emotionally healthy male friendships. Encourage your son to have friends, maintain close friendships, and model positive conflict resolution in your own relationships.

Do ordinary, everyday things together. Go for regular haircuts and

create a ritual out of weekly trips to the farmers’ market. Do some gardening together. Give the dog a bath and clean out the fish tank.

Play H-O-R-S-E. These can be the building blocks for a strong father-son relationship that can survive the ups and downs of growing up.

Recognize that a strong father-son relationship probably will look wildly different from a strong mother-son relationship.

Improving a Teenage Boy’s Relationship With His Mother: Don’t Mistake Distance for Rejection In early childhood, being a mom to a boy is pretty simple and straightforward. We comfort them, read to them, and cuddle with them.

We do their laundry, dress them, pack their lunches and see them off to school. But it gets more complicated as they grow up. They seem to not need us as much — which makes it tough to figure out where we fit into their lives.

As moms, we have to remember that boys are different. Keep this in mind when you think about how you communicate with your son. Realize and accept that communication with your son is very different from your conversations and interactions with your BFFs or your own mom. Here’s what happens: as a boy gets older, “he will still look to his mother for love and acceptance, but he will distance himself from her when he feels the need for autonomy or to assert his ‘boyness’.”

This behavior is confusing to moms.

Some mothers believe that their sons’ distance and desire for independence means they don’t need or want love and nurturing. They take it as rejection. This is a mistake. In fact, “A boy never loses his need to be understood and loved by his mother.”

Despite his distance, your son still wants and needs the nurturing touch and expressions of love from his mother. Don’t stop trying to create physical closeness with your adolescent son. Just realize that the physical expression of caring and nurturing will look a lot different for a teen boy as opposed to when he was little. As moms, our job is to figure out what that is.

What can mothers do to strengthen their relationship with their teenage sons?

Accept the high energy levels and physicality of boys. Give your son safe places to express it.

At each milestone in the boy’s life (such as toddlerhood, entering kindergarten, hitting puberty, and then graduating from high school and leaving home), a mother must adjust her parenting style in order for her son to feel that she has confidence in his ability to handle new experiences. Let him stand on his own as he experiences new things. Don’t try to insulate him from all failure.

Provide him with emotional support by simply listening and sharing his emotions. Express confidence in him and support him as he solves his problems.

Determine how and when physical closeness is appropriate for your son.

Remember that he still wants and

needs the physical closeness but may never say anything about it.

Try to view the world through your son’s lens and not your own.

“When we see a mother and son in a synchronous relationship, we see a mother willing to look upon childrearing as a practice — and willing to try to view the world through her son’s eyes in order to understand his needs.”

Support your son’s friendships and accept the fact that they will look very different from your female relationships.

What Boys Need From All of Us: 10 Tips to Raise a Boy Right We love our boys. They’re smart and funny, active and physical. And they’re capable of experiencing mighty feelings and emotions. Let’s help them grow and develop academically, physically, and emotionally.

Here’s what they need from us to develop and protect their emotional health: Teach your son to understand and recognize the emotions inside himself and others. Talk about your own emotions. Help him to develop empathy and compassion by caring for pets, children, the elderly, or the disabled.

Teach boys that there are many ways to be a man. Celebrate the differences. Let him know there are so many ways for him to be a man — not just the strong, unflinching, stoic, superhero male stereotype.

Listen without judgment to your son’s opinions and feelings. Don’t discount his opinions. Honor his feelings.

Consult and problem-solve with him. Don’t simply dictate what you think the solution to his problem is.

Communicate with him in a “boy” way. Be direct and specific. Don’t be disappointed with brief responses.

Use firm, clear, and compassionate discipline which allows him to build character. This helps him develop his inner conscience to guide him in his decision making.

Recognize that while boys pull away due to their need for independence, they still need an emotional connection with you. Don’t mistake their withdrawal for lack of caring or rejection.

Be patient. It may take some time to draw a boy out and to persuade him that it’s safe to be emotionally transparent.

Create a safe and protected space where there is no judgment and no pressure, a space or place where boys are given permission to express all of their emotions.

Create your safe space by using a familiar ritual. This could be commuting to school and practices and games, riding bikes around the neighborhood, hiking, going grocery shopping, playing basketball, or working in the yard. Find something familiar and make it your own.

I’ll leave you with one final quote from the authors: “Our boys are going to grow up to be many sizes, to possess many skills, and to do a wide variety of things. We must not disregard their many offerings; we must not make them feel that they do not measure up, that we disdain their contributions. We have to ask a lot of them, morally and spiritually, and we have to support them in their efforts to please us. And if they try to please us, we must communicate to them that they are not a disappointment to us.

The only thing that will make growing up psychologically safe for our sons is for them to know that we value them and that we love them, and that we have every confidence that they will grow naturally into good men.”

Jen Wilson is a parenting blogger and a busy mom of two boys. She lives in Mililani, Hawaii. Check her out at parentingremix.com.

resilience

Helping others – builds resilience

re·sil·ience noun 1. the ability to bounce back from tough times.

Learn more at

ResilientRoanoke.org Roanoke Prevention Alliance

#ResilientRoanoke

Think outside the book.

NORTH CROSS SCHOOL was founded on the belief that a classroom is a concept, not a room. With small groups, teachers are inspired and empowered to curate lessons, not follow them. Children pursue their best in a community that supports and respects curiosity and innovation.

With programs designed to engage, question and surprise, every North Cross graduate is a product of our ceaseless evaluation of what works—and, a commitment to embrace what’s next.

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education. teachers

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books

education: at home the skill.” Any hands-on learning will work—even board games that use simple addition to calculate points.

If there are specific subjects you want to help your children learn, finding the right kind of puzzle requires a little creativity.

Here are some ideas to try: English Or Language Puzzles Word games and logic puzzles lend themselves easily to developing language and writing skills. “Puzzles can be particularly powerful in the English and Language Arts classroom because they allow students to approach words logically, mathematically, and visually, creating cross-brain connections,” explains high school English teacher and blogger, Danielle Hall. She also suggests using a game in the style of Taboo® to review characters or major themes from a book, or to help kids memorize vocabulary words.

History Or Social Science Puzzles

Serious Learning,

Serious Fun

How Brainteasers, Games, and Puzzles Help Kids Learn

By Hannah Thelen Finding engaging learning opportunities that will capture a child’s attention and fight off boredom during the summer months is a constant struggle for every parent. The solution to this problem may be found nestled at the intersection between play and learning: Puzzles.

Puzzles come in many forms. Traditional jigsaw puzzles and other physical assembly puzzles, word puzzles, math puzzles, and logic puzzles have been enjoyed for generations, and exist all over the world. Regardless of what form they come in, puzzles and other thinking games offer extensive cognitive benefits while keeping kids of all ages active, engaged, and motivated to learn.

Kathleen Donahue, homeschool parent and owner of Labyrinth Games and Puzzles in Washington, D.C., facilitates after-school strategic game classes in 13 elementary schools, and knows firsthand the power of puzzles in children’s education. Donahue says that puzzles are “less intimidating than a lot of other educational instruments,” so kids have more confidence when practicing their skills. “With games, puzzles, and boardgames, there is an attainable

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Family/July 2019

solution. And if it is attainable, kids don’t give up.”

Educators like Donahue know that solving puzzles isn’t just fun. It actually exercises skills that make it easier for kids to understand and retain difficult lessons.

These include critical thinking skills, problem solving abilities, creativity, visualization, and memory.

Developing critical thinking skills is especially important, as described in a paper from American Psychologist: “We know that middle school students can make substantial improvements in problem-solving ability—even general IQ— when they are taught general principles of critical thinking.”

Puzzles require kids to create strategies in order to solve a problem, applying both prior knowledge and new information.

They also encourage kids to contemplate and compare solutions in order to achieve a goal.

Furthermore, games can be used to develop more specialized skills. For example, Donahue says, “If kids have to use math to win a game, they more readily internalize the concept and

Classic crossword puzzles, created using historical figures, events, or vocabulary, are perfect for history or social studies lessons. They can help kids connect important information given in the clues, such as “Written by James Madison in 1789” to the phrase they are trying to guess, “Bill of Rights.”

Math Puzzles Number-oriented games like chess, checkers, or the card game “ninety-nine” are great ways to exercise math skills.

Logic puzzles and math story problems are even better. Fun story problems can be found in the book One Minute Mysteries: 65 Short Mysteries You Solve With Math, which offers brief, one-page “mysteries” that can only be solved using math and logic skills. These brainteasers can be worked on individually or discussed together before revealing the answer on the next page. Ryan McAllister, Ph.D., a biophysicist at Georgetown University, said of the book, “Math often gets a bad rap for being hard and unpleasant. Mysteries, on the other hand, are fun and exciting…. Readers get to use their logic and reasoning skills while playing Sherlock Holmes!”

Science Puzzles Incorporating puzzles into a science lesson can be tricky, but fortunately the One Minute Mysteries series also offers 65 Short Mysteries You Solve with Science, and 65 More Short Mysteries You Solve with Science. With the same brainteaser format as the math book, these puzzles require kids to think critically and utilize their science knowledge to find a solution. Even without specific science content, any puzzles can be used to introduce the scientific method. To solve a puzzle, kids must observe, hypothesize, test their solution, and make conclusions.

The benefits of puzzle solving don’t end

with helping kids learn. Working on puzzles can also build social skills and promote positive thinking. Working together with other individuals demonstrates patience, teamwork, and listening skills. Furthermore, “Overcoming the challenges involved in solving a puzzle really gives [kids] a sense of achievement and pride within themselves,” says Janice Davis, Early Childhood Teacher and Learning 4 Kids Founder. “It provides a boost to their self-confidence and selfesteem.”

Puzzles and games provide a rare safe environment where, Kathleen Donahue explains, “you can try them over and over again to gain mastery,” which teaches perseverance and makes a child’s success more impactful.

Regularly using puzzles to create learning lessons for your child not only helps prevent summer learning loss, but also allows them to think creatively to solve problems, process and memorize information more effectively, and gain personal skills that can be used for a lifetime.

Hannah Thelen is an editor for Platypus Media, and strongly believes in the importance of children’s education. She earned her BFA in creative writing from Bowling Green State University, and she now lives in Silver Spring, MD, where she enjoys board games and hefty books. She can be reached at Hannah@PlatypusMedia.com.

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education: science

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Family/July 2019

Eyeing the Future

with the Science Museum of Western Virginia by: Koren Smith The Science Museum of Western Virginia has some exciting new plans in store for us.

Through a GoFundMe effort, they’re raising money to open an exhibit called The Eye, an immersive digital environment that will be the only one of its kind available to the public on the East Coast.

The Hopkins Planetarium has been an iconic part of Roanoke for more than 36 years and has created warm memories for our community throughout that time. However, the planetarium has been closed to the public for the past two years as the museum reviewed how they were going to update the space.

“The planetarium’s technology was outdated and did not represent the current age of modern technology,” said Executive Director Rachel Hopkins. “With nearby cities like Radford owning an updated planetarium, it was important that we looked at other avenues to offer our community

something unique that wasn’t available anywhere else.”

So the museum found a distinct way to renovate the space — one that would use the original 40-foot dome, significantly reducing the costs associated with the new exhibit, and at the same time move forward into the modern technological age. The concept for The Eye came as a result of the Science Museum’s strong working partnership with Virginia Tech.

VT’s Institute of Creativity, Arts, and Technology and the Moss Arts Center in Blacksburg share a state-of-the-art research facility called The Cube, which features similar technology to that which will be used in The Eye. While the space is primarily used for research and experimentation, content created for The Cube will be available for the Science Museum to display in the new exhibit.

“The Eye will significantly expand the traditional

planetarium experience, as it will be capable of displaying content of any kind. It incorporates a new technology called stereoscopic vision, which allows content that is displayed on the dome to come away from the screen and surround the user like a hologram,” Hopkins explained. “The Eye will be a uniquely effective tool for communicating current scientific research.”

in Richmond led museum directors to launch the crowd fundraiser earlier this month.

“We really have a unique opportunity to double our fundraising efforts up to $100,000 with the backing of our community,” said Director of Philanthropy Mary Roberts Baako. “The foundation wants to see widespread support for this exhibit, and we know that Roanoke is the perfect community to ask for this, as The Science Museum educates we are a city that strives for more than 36,000 excellence and students a year, the chance to “The Eye will and the new put Roanoke on exhibit is designed the map.” be the most to engage high-tech The Science students in a way Museum is classroom, that is relatable to asking for help their world — i.e. the most to raise a total the digital world. of $250,000 spectacular That said, The its Eye will benefit meeting room, through GoFundMe more than the and the most campaign — kids in our school $100,000 of engaging systems. The which will be technology can presentation doubled thanks be used for visual to the matching platform in the presentations by grant. That local researchers country, all in would be enough and businesses, one space.” to complete the and could even be renovation of adapted for visual the current space and purchase competitions and TED Talks. the specialized projection “This is a community space, and speaker systems. The and we are committed to turnaround time for this utilizing it in a way that project will be surprisingly anyone who wishes to explore quick once the funds have the technology has a chance been raised. to do so,” Marketing Director “The largest component of Koren Smith explained. “The this project is the renovation Eye will be the most highand updating of the current tech classroom, the most spectacular meeting room, and space,” said Hopkins. “With the most engaging presentation the backing of our community, we could see this exhibit platform in the country, all in become a reality by the end of one space.” the year.”

The Science Museum has raised almost $200,000 already To get more information about the campaign and to make a through corporate donations; donation, head to gofundme. a $100,000 matching grant com/invest-eyenoke! from a family foundation

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www.CommunitySchool.net 540-563-5036 Family/July 2019

37

education: books

Rachel’s Reads

by: Rachel Levine

Books are magic. They enable us see ourselves and others with fresh eyes. It is through stories that we can learn about differences between people while also finding a deeper understanding of all we have in common with each other. Check out these marvelous books to help your children better understand themselves, their friends, and their neighbors. All these books are available at Roanoke Valley Libraries — plus, keep a look out for El Deafo by Cece Bell at Roanoke Valley Family’s Little Free Libraries around town!

Junkyard Wonders

by Patricia Polacco Children’s author and illustrator Patricia Polacco has dyslexia. She was bullied throughout her childhood for her disability, but found true friends and mentors along the way. Junkyard Wonders is the true story of her special education class (cruelly called “the junkyard” by other children) and their teacher, Mrs. Peterson. Mrs. Peterson sees the incredible potential in each child and inspires them to reach for the moon. Patricia and her friends rise to the challenge and do something truly incredible together. This powerful book does deal with bullying and the death of one of Patricia’s dear friends, and is probably best for upper elementary students.

Not So Different

by Shane Burcaw Not So Different is an incredible book by YouTuber Shane Burcaw about living with spinal muscular atrophy. Shane writes with such openness that reading his book feels like having a conversation with a good friend. His sense of humor carries through as he talks about the challenges he faces while still living a fun and full life. When you’re done reading, you are going to wish you could hang out with Shane in real life!

A Friend for Henry

by Jenn Bailey A Friend for Henry tells the tale of Henry’s search for a friend. Henry has autism and is looking for a friend he’s comfortable with. Sometimes he has a hard time understanding how other kids act, and sometimes other kids have a hard time understanding the things he does.

Eventually, Henry finds Kate. Kate and Henry have different likes and dislikes, but together they find common ground and friendship.

El Deafo

by Cece Bell El Deafo is a Newberry Award-winning graphic novel based on Cece Bell’s experiences growing up deaf in the Roanoke Valley. Cece discusses feeling alone, the pain of being treated differently than other people, and her search for one good friend. The hearing people in Cece’s life often hurt her feelings with misguided attempts to be helpful.

Cece copes with these challenges by imagining herself as El Deafo, a superhero with amazing secret powers.

Emmanuel’s Dream

by Laurie Ann Thompson and Sean Qualls Emanuel Ofosu Yeboah is a passionate disability activist in Ghana. Authors Laurie Ann Thompson and Sean Qualls tell Emmanuel’s courageous tale in Emmanuel’s Dream.

Emmanuel was born with one leg, but he taught himself to play soccer and even ride a bike. He rode his bike all the way around Ghana to raise awareness of the abilities of people with disabilities. His work eventually led to the passing of the Persons with Disability Act in Ghana in 2006, which granted equal rights to Ghanaians with physical disabilities.

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Free-Range Summers

by Becky Mushko

I

n the 1950s when I was young, the term “free-range kids” wasn’t used, but that’s indeed what we were in my Williamson Road neighborhood.

We played outside, we explored our neighborhood, and we entertained ourselves — especially in summer.

“No more pencils, no more books! No more teacher’s dirty looks!” my friends and I chanted in early June as we walked home from Huff Lane School on the last day. We’d be free of educational obligations for three whole months.

We didn’t go cold turkey (a term that hadn’t been thought of in those days). For a week in June, we usually attended Bible School — which was a little like school but without homework or tests. Although I wasn’t a member of Grace Methodist Church, my friend Martha was, so I went with her.

I don’t remember any parental involvement — we kids walked a few blocks to the corner of Floraland and Williamson where the church was, showed up, and were admitted to a class in

an old house that used to be behind the church. After a morning of singing “Row, Row, Row Your Boat,” “Jesus Loves Me,” and other songs that everyone knew, we worked on craft projects and had a snack — usually cookies and Kool-Aid. We were back home in time for lunch.

When it was too hot to play in the sun, we might lounge on an old quilt and read comics book in the shade or stay inside and read books.

Sometimes we’d ride our bikes to Huff Lane School to play unsupervised on the playground.

Usually, we’d take a piece of wax paper to slick up the slide so we’d go down really fast.

We’d swing as high as we dared, and then we’d climb on the monkey bars — which some called a jungle gym — without anyone to tell us how high we could climb or how long we could hang by our knees.

During the school year, girls weren’t allowed to climb high because we wore dresses and boys might see our underpants. But wearing our shorts in summer allowed us to climb as high as we wanted. From the top, we could get a good view of the Huff Farm next door. I don’t remember anyone ever falling onto the asphalt below.

Our bikes gave us the freedom to explore, too. When we were six or seven, we usually ventured no more than two or three blocks from home.

Most folks in that area knew who we were or where we belonged, so we could always stop for help if needed.

Since most women didn’t go to work, housewives would be home to no doubt keep a watchful eye on us as we passed by. I don’t remember ever needing help, though.

At eight or nine, we’d go farther. If we had a dime, we could ride the shady back streets to Hardies — a combination gas station/convenience store — on Williamson Road for a Coke or an ice cream bar. If we had any empty soft-drink bottles, we could turn them in for a refund. I think it was 2¢ a bottle.

By the time we were ten, we’d ride to Evans Drug Store near the intersection of Hershberger Road and

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Williamson. Of course, Hershberger didn’t have nearly the traffic it does today, so it was easy to cross, and what would become Crossroads Mall was then a cow pasture. Evans Drug Store was my main source for comic books when I was ten, and a few years later my source for movie magazines. When I was twelve, I bought my first Revlon lipstick there.

We didn’t always ride bikes. On Saturdays, we’d walk a mile along Williamson Road to the Lee Theater for the Kiddie Show, which cost a quarter. The main movie was usually a western, but there was also a serial (usually Tarzan), and a couple of cartoons. I don’t remember any parents attending with their kids.

If we didn’t go to the Kiddie Show, we’d spend an entire Saturday morning watching TV because the shows were geared to kids. There were cartoons, but I’ve forgotten which ones. I remember Sky King was a western with an airplane, and Fury was kind of a modern western about a boy and his horse.

I loved horses, so I rarely missed a western. Rinky Dink and You was an interactive show, in which viewers could attach a plastic cover to the TV screen and use special crayons to draw objects to help Rinky Dink achieve his goal. A voice-over would tell us what crayon to use and what to draw: “Use the black crayon to draw a bridge so Rinky can cross the river.” Mr. Wizard introduced us to science experiments and told us what to eat for breakfast: “Fruit, cereal, milk, bread, and butter.” Prior to Mr. Wizard, we’d always eaten eggs and bacon or sausage for breakfast, but afterward, we demanded the cereal that sponsored the show.

We played outside games during the summer — tag, hide and seek, croquet, badminton. Hide and seek was especially fun in the dark.

Since everyone had a cap gun, we might play cowboys and Indians, which wasn’t considered politically incorrect in those days. None of us

had ever met a real Native American, but we were familiar with cowboys from all the Westerns on TV. Just about everybody watched Gunsmoke, Hopalong Cassidy, Roy Rogers, Gene Autry, Lone Ranger, Have Gun Will Travel, and others. I don’t remember any organized sports. If we needed a team to play a game, we formed teams with whoever was playing outside at the time. We kept cool by soaking in a wading pool in the backyard. When it was too hot to play in the sun, we might lounge on an old quilt and read comics book in the shade or stay inside and read books.

Parents almost never supervised our outdoor recreation. Once in a while, a parent might take a carload of kids to Lakeside or Tinkerbell swimming pool, but in the neighborhood we were pretty much on our own. I don’t remember any fights breaking out, and arguments were usually settled quickly — a little name-calling and maybe a few thrown rocks was the extent of it.

Once a week or so, we might accompany our mothers on their

shopping trips. This involved a bus ride to downtown, so we’d have to dress up — no shorts and sneakers! My mama would always buy some canned goods from the A&P at the edge of the market, fresh meat from one of the butchers in the market building, and some fresh vegetables from the outside vendors. When she had two shopping bags full, it was time to catch the bus for home. Once in a while, we might first take in a western movie at the Rialto Theater near the market or shop in the dime stores a block or two up Campbell Avenue.

On some Sundays, Mama and I would ride the bus to Grandma’s house in Rugby, where my cousins and I played outside while the grown-ups stayed inside and talked. Grandma’s big front yard was perfect for games that involved running or required us to spread out. We played Red Light-Green Light, Mother May I, Old Gramma Hippy-Toe, and London Bridge Is Falling Down. We sometimes explored the Watts farm next door, taking care to keep our distance from the resident bull. Sometimes we’d go down the

hill past Grandma’s big garden to Lick Run Creek, where we might wade or look for minnows. Sometimes, we’d just sit on the bridge and watch the water as it flowed toward 10th Street.

Once, when I was five, I leaned a little too far over and fell in. My nine-yearold cousin reached down and pulled me out. By the time we climbed the hill back to Grandma’s house, I was halfway dry.

Looking back, I’m glad we didn’t have computers, tablets, and video games that would’ve kept us inside and isolated. I’m glad that instead of virtual reality, we had real reality — playing games with real people, running across real fields, riding bikes to real places, and even falling into real creeks. The 1950s was a great time to be a free-range kid.

Becky Mushko grew up in Roanoke and taught in Roanoke public schools from 1971 until 1997. She blogs about her life at peevishpen.blogspot. com and about her Nace ancestors at nacelithia.blogspot.com. Her website is beckymushko. com.

Family/July 2019

45

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growing toddlers

/

kids

/

teens

up.

growing up: toddlers

Celebrate without Fear

Fireworks can be really scary for kids, but we want them to be able to enjoy the pretty show. Use these tricks to make fireworks less scary for kids! by: Tara Prest Summer. Fourth of July. Independence Day. Cookouts, parades, flags, and fireworks. This is definitely a holiday to celebrate. As parents, we are so excited to share these moments with our children — and we should!

However, it is very easy to forget to see these party traditions through the eyes of a small child. Bright lights, fire, and loud noises typically trigger fight-or-flight responses in children (and pets — and some adults). While it is great to share these holiday rites of passage with our kids, there are a few things we can do to make the experience a little less frightening!

Bring comforts.

Talk about fireworks ahead of time.

Use earplugs/ear protectors.

No one likes surprises in the form of loud BOOMS and explosions.

Talk about what fireworks are and what they look like. Find a video of some fireworks. Read a book about fireworks. Explain that special people (such as firemen) learn how to use fireworks safely.

Sit a good distance away from the ground show.

Fireworks are extra scary when they are close. Kids can see the ground show when they are older. For younger children, the farther away the better until they’re comfortable with the experience.

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A comfy lawn blanket , an extra blanket if it gets chilly, maybe a comfy pillow. Does your child have a favorite blanket or stuffed animal?

Bring anything (within reason) that he or she uses as a comfort measure.

A glowing stuffed animal or light-up toy would be fun. You could also stop at the dollar store for some glowing necklaces, bracelets, etc. to get the kids excited — and save a bunch of money since there is a huge markup on these items at the show.

They may be your best friend at the fireworks. Even as an adult, I find some of the louder BOOMS interfere with my enjoyment of the show. By minimizing the loud noises, your child may be able to enjoy the pretty lights in the sky. It is usually the noise that scares kids, not the fireworks themselves. You can buy special noise-reducing earphones or earmuffs for kids. They are used in loud situations (such as car races, concerts, and sporting events). They come in different sizes to fit just about anyone.

Have an escape plan.

When your little one is overwhelmed

and wants to leave, you want to get out of there quickly. Escape may not be easy through crowds of people.

Try to pick a viewing location that allows for a quick exit if needed. Be aware of your surroundings and take a survey of your location to plan a quick getaway!

Leave when your child needs to.

If your child doesn’t like the fireworks after a few minutes, chances are that the experience is not going to grow on him tonight.

Take your planned escape and get him to the car. When he is calm, you can talk about why he was scared and plan better for next time. It may just be that your child is not yet ready for the experience, and that happens at different times for each unique kid.

Reassure her that everything is okay and you can try again another time if she wants to. There will always be another fireworks show.

Tara Prest is a parenting blogger (check out her website, livinginhappyplace.com!) and mom of three kids under five who all love to sing, dance, craft, and be silly.

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growing up: toddlers

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growing up: kids

Talking to kids

About Drugs

by Susan Baldani

In order to reduce the likelihood of drug abuse, start talking to your kids about the dangers of drugs while they’re young. Waiting until the teenage years may be too late.

“I have been talking to my children about drugs since they were four and five years old,” said Christine Scally, a social worker and mother of two teenage boys, ages 17 and 18, from New Jersey. “We’ve always been very matter-of-fact about it. Because of what I do for a living, the kids know that I have firsthand knowledge of what can go wrong when someone makes a bad choice. We kept it simple initially and focused on how drugs are bad for your body and can cause you to put yourself in harm’s way.”

With young children, start with conversations about how good it feels when we take care of our bodies by doing things like eating right and getting a good night’s sleep. Discuss how this allows them to play and have fun because they are healthy.

As they get a little older, expand the discussion and talk about things that can make them sick, such as poisons and other harmful substances. This can then lead into a discussion about drugs and how they can affect our bodies in a bad way. Keep things simple at first.

“Let them know, for instance, that being high on alcohol or drugs makes it harder to play ball, finish a puzzle, or do other things they enjoy,” said Laura

growing up: kids them, allowing somebody in your car with drugs on them, driving under the influence and hurting somebody else, and how that could impact your life,” said Scally.

Make sure you know what the different drugs are and their effects, as well as other names they may go by. A great resource is the National Institute on Drug Abuse for Teens (teens.drugabuse.gov/drugfacts), which gives street names of various drugs and comprehensive information on each one.

Broadwell, a health writer for Parents and other magazines.

seniors saying they do not view regular marijuana smoking as very harmful.”

One of the hot topics right now is marijuana. Kids may be hearing multiple points of view on whether it should be legalized or not, but parents need to stress that just because it’s legal for some adults in some states, that doesn’t mean it’s okay for children to use.

When speaking about the dangers of drugs, stick with the facts and focus on the present. Children and teens are more interested in how things will affect them today, not years from now. Explain the dangers of marijuana and other drugs, such as learning, attention, and memory problems, poor coordination and motor skills, loss of motivation, sleep issues, and poor judgment. All of these can lead to problems in school, as well as in their personal lives.

According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), in 2018, “About ten percent of eighth graders, twenty-six percent of tenth graders, and thirty-seven percent of twelfth graders reported using marijuana in the last year. At the same time, teens are developing more positive attitudes about using marijuana, with seventy-one percent of high school

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“As they got older, I got much more specific about the ripple effects of doing drugs and, for example, getting pulled over by the police, being in a car with somebody who has drugs on

Teens often use drugs not only to fit in with their peers, but to also to ward off feelings of boredom, anxiety, and depression. Let them know there are alternatives for handling these issues. If they are bored, get them involved in a sport they like or another hobby that will occupy their time. For anxiety and depression, have them speak with a professional who can teach them how to cope with their feelings in a healthier, more positive way.

Be clear on your stand against drug use, and keep in mind that children learn from watching, not just listening.

According to the NIDA, “Parents, grandparents, and older siblings are models that children follow, and research suggests that family members’ use of alcohol and drugs plays a strong role in whether a young person starts using drugs.”

Also, help your child learn how to say no to drugs. “Kids who don’t know how to respond when offered alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs, or who don’t know how to get out of sticky situations, are more likely to give in to

Kids who don’t know how to respond when offered alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs, or who don’t know how to get out of sticky situations, are more likely to give in to peer pressure.

peer pressure. Act out some real-life situations with your child and brainstorm solutions for what she can say,” said Broadwell.

Drugs & Kids

Of course, children need to know that some people take medications for their health, so help them understand the difference between legal and illegal drugs. Explain that certain drugs, such as Ritalin and Xanax, are legal when prescribed by a doctor for a medical reason. While these are some of the same drugs sold on the street, when taken responsibly under a doctor’s supervision, they help people cope with medical conditions.

By the 8th grade:

“Make sure your child knows your rules about drug use and the consequences if they’re broken. Kids this age can understand the reason for rules and appreciate having limits in place (whether or not they’ll admit it!). What’s more, research shows that children are less likely to use tobacco, alcohol, and other drugs if their parents have established a pattern of setting clear rules and consequences for breaking them,” said Broadwell.

28%

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15%

have smoked cigarettes

16.5%

have used marijuana

50%

high school seniors do not think it’s harmful to try crack or cocaine once or twice

40%

believe it’s not harmful to use heroin once or twice.

60%

High school seniors don’t see regular marijana use as harmful

Make your children feel comfortable and respected during these conversations.

They will then be more likely to come to you when faced with difficult situations.

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Family/July 2019

53

growing up: teens

by: Grace Partin

my ultimate getaway As a student and a human being, I have experienced stress. I know for a fact that most people have at least experienced a stressful situation in their lifetimes and will probably bear witness to more than one.

Stress tends to creep up on you like the exam in your class that’s “practically months away.” It’s like the ultimate bad-hair day, the worst case scenario come true and it’s all wrapped up in a tiny little package, sitting outside your door.

Being constantly stressed out is quite dangerous. It’s safe to say that people could do without more and more stress, but how can we limit it?

Personally, whenever I am feeling stressed or I feel like I need to take a break, the one thing that always calms me down is imagining my perfect permanent vacation.

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Family/July 2019

Being a “writer” myself, I find it always easy to do this. Take a setting from your favorite Harry Potter book, add a little pizazz and a cool butler named Franklin, and boom! Instant fantasy vacation just waiting to relax and calm you.

This method works for me because I have an extremely active imagination, but you can always bend it to your will. I see this method as more of a distraction and a way to soothe your frantic nerves, but being that I’m only a fifteen-year-old who doesn’t really have anything else to do about it, it works just fine — especially if you’re like me and want to write everything down.

Now, I’m going to be sharing with you my ultimate fantasy permanent vacation, just to show you how easy it is to make one and encourage you to just give it a try. It doesn’t matter

if your place is whimsical, illogical, or just plain crazy. That’s what makes it unique. My fantasy is tailored to my personal idea of relaxation and what I enjoy most in the world.

Yours can be the same, similar, or completely different. That’s the beauty of it — it’s all up to you.

Imagine a large snowy mountain.

The air around it is cold and damp but clear, and it is almost constantly snowing. The sky seems to always be dusk, and there is nary a worry of a sunburn. Now, imagine about halfway up this large mountain there is a small village. Mostly, the citizens of this place own local shops and are quite friendly. The houses all look like German cottages, and the road going throughout the town is made of stone. Snow lightly glazes each and every one of the houses, and there is a lovely, warm atmosphere within such a cold and secluded area. The

houses are lined up neatly, and the smell of baked goods hangs in the air. Up the road from the town is a larger house surrounded by trees.

This house is a log cabin with a lovely front porch and a back deck with a hot tub. The hot tub overlooks the valley and gives a lovely view of all the other large mountains. Within the cabin itself is a large living room, a library, a kitchen, and two bedrooms equipped with their own bathrooms.

The living room is the first thing that you see when coming into the house, and a stone fireplace greets you. In front of this is a large sofa and a flatscreen TV, welcoming you with your favorite shows.

The prime spot of this house would be the library, with the smell of old books and paper greeting you.

Many novels line the walls and are organized by title. There are many bookshelves lining the walls, with a small reading nook in the middle of the room. The nook includes a

Roanoke Adventist Christian School, formerly known as Roanoke Adventist Preparatory School, has been offering quality Christian education at family friendly prices in the Roanoke area for 80 years. Our school is a small classroom environment where students receive grade-level appropriate individualized instruction.

Our school is fully accredited. Specific learning standards by grade level may be found by visiting: adventisteducation.org/ curriculum

swinging chair, a bean bag, and a little table for holding hot drinks.

All the rooms of the cabin have dark hardwood floors, and the walls are lined with quilted patterns of the mountain.

See? You don’t even have to imagine much, and you’ll feel a calming sense rush over you if your place seems good enough. I haven’t even thought of what the kitchen or what the bedrooms look like, and yet, it seems complete to me. Whenever I’m having a rough day at school, or I’m stressing about choir or forensics, I always like to picture myself drinking green tea in the reading nook, taking a dip in the hottub, or walking down to the village to get some fresh bread. You do not have to write your place down, but you can always imagine it. Maybe you can imagine a different place every time.

Sometimes, I even enjoy imagining some of my close friends visiting me in my lovely cabin and enjoying the

village just as much as I do. What you imagine is entirely up to you, and you can choose to make it anything you want.

My method of stress relief and calming is used in almost everything I do. If I need to go to sleep but just can’t seem to drift off, I may imagine more and more things in my mountain environment. However, I do think it is important to try other methods of stress relief and mindfulness.

Meditation (so I have been told) is great for this. It is my personal belief that you should try something that is good for you and keep trying things until one works. No matter if you try my method or completely ignore it, you should always strive to make your own personal life less stressful or make your life feel better.

Roanoke Adventist Christian School Fosters Academic Excellence • Passionate Spirituality • Outstanding Character In Each Student Roanoke Adventist Christian School has been offering quality Christian education at family friendly prices in the Roanoke area for over 80 years.

Registration fees are $340 until May 31. After June 1, the registration fee will increase to $390. A $50 charge for transfer students is also required.

Schedule a FREE Educational Success Consultation or a Kindergarten Readiness Evaluation These free consultations focus on goals for your child, academic preparation and readiness and planning for future choices. These consultations will also help us, should you choose our school, to better serve your child.

Our school offers tuition rates that are highly competitive and scholarship opportunities are available. All financial aid applications are processed on a first-come basis so early applications are encouraged.

Call us at 540-798-6061 or email RoanokeAdventistPrep@gmail.com to set an appointment Family/July 2019

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just for recipes

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fun.

experiments

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diy

just for fun: Kids Recipe submitted by:

Kid-Made Pizza From Scratch!

Submit your child’s favorite healthy recipe and if we print your recipe you will win a $25 Kroger gift card!

Ingredients: For the dough:

For the pizza:

2 cups white whole wheat flour 1 packet instant yeast 1 ½ teaspoons sugar ¾ teaspoon sea salt ¼ teaspoon garlic powder ¼ teaspoon dried oregano 2 tablespoons oil (I use avocado oil) ¾ cup warm water (not too hot, or you can kill the yeast!)

Prepared pizza dough Store-bought pizza sauce 1 red bell pepper, sliced Sliced black olives

Low-fat organic mozzarella cheese

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Family/July 2019

Sponsored by:

just for fun: Kids Recipe

How To Make the Dough Step 1: In a large bowl, mix 1 cup of the flour together with yeast, sugar, garlic powder, oregano, and salt.

Step 2: Add the oil and the warm water. Using a wooden spoon, stir the mixture until there aren’t any clumps left.

Step 3: Add the second cup of flour. Stir until you can’t anymore, and then use your hands to mix the dough. If it’s really sticky, add a tablespoon more flour at a time until it’s just slightly sticky.

Step 4: Drizzle another large bowl with oil, making sure to cover the sides. Make the dough into a ball shape and put it in the oiled bowl.

Step 5: Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and allow it to rise for 30 minutes.

Step 6: Preheat the oven to 425F.

Putting the Pizza Together

Step 1: After the dough has risen for 30 minutes, take off the plastic wrap and punch the dough down with your fist.

Step 2: Sprinkle flour on a cutting board, and then move the dough from the bowl to the floured cutting board.

Step 3: Knead the dough with your hands for 1 minute. (Fold it on top of itself, press it down, fold it again, press it down, etc.)

Step 4: Move the dough to a baking pan lined with parchment paper. Push the dough into a circle (or an oval, or an amoeba!), about 12” wide, with your hands or a rolling pin.

Step 5: Use a fork to poke holes all over the dough. This is so no bubbles will form while the pizza cooks.

Step 6: Drizzle some oil on the dough and spread it around.

Step 7: Spread pizza sauce all over the dough, except for the edges.

Step 8: Add the sliced bell peppers and the black olives.

Step 9: Sprinkle the mozzarella cheese all over the pizza.

Step 10: Bake the pizza in the preheated oven for 13 minutes (or until the crust is just starting to turn brown). Slice it, serve it, and eat it!

Family/July 2019

59

just for fun: experiment

Kitchen Fireworks Supplies: Glitter Water Dish soap Plate or bowl Cotton swab or toothpick Directions: Fill the dish or bowl with water.

Pour the glitter into the water so that it’s in one clump (do not sprinkle it all over the plate or bowl).

Dip the cotton swab or toothpick in the water. Does anything happen?

Dip the cotton swab or toothpick into the dish soap so that the end is covered.

Experiment provided by

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Family/July 2019

Dip the soapy side of the cotton swab or toothpick into the center of the glitter and watch what happens. All of the glitter should rush to the sides of the plate or bowl like a firework exploding!

What’s happening?

If you remember our Tie Dye Milk experiment from last month, you might recall that we explored surface tension.

Surface tension is a term scientists use to describe how well or tightly molecules stick together at the top of a liquid.

In fact, if you look at the top of the plate or bowl of water before you add soap, you might notice a bulge or bump.

This is because the water at the top is sticking together.

When you add soap, you lower

Try this!

the surface tension and all of Try this same experiment with those molecules move apart, sequins or larger Does which makes the sparkles. glitter rush to it still work?of the dish. the sides

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family: wellness

Your Brain on Swimming

by Kimberly Emory

Everyone knows that swimming is good for you. Since it’s a form of exercise, it helps to maintain a healthy body and weight, and as your physical form improves, so can your mental state of mind. Of course, most forms of exercise also release endorphins, those feel-good hormones that create the addicting “runner’s high” feeling in most people — another added boost for the body and mind.

Swimming, in particular, is a great form of exercise because almost anyone can exercise in the water.

Water holds weight, so those who are overweight or pregnant can exercise much more easily in the water than they could on land. Water also has a cushioning effect, which reduces stress to the skeletal system while working out, making it ideal for those prone to injury (like the elderly) or recovering from injury. Many athletes from different sports include swimming in their training because it can help increase flexibility and evenly tones the whole body while working many muscle groups at once.

However, most people don’t know that swimming can have great benefits to your brain and its functionality. Below are four amazing ways swimming boosts brain power.

Swimming improves brain function Studies have found that when you’re immersed in a steep pool up to the level of your heart, blood flow to the middle cerebral arteries increases 14 percent, and to the posterior cerebral arteries it increases nine percent. This

blood flow increase can improve your brain functionality overall. However, since when you swim for exercise you are mostly horizontal, you get the benefit regardless of how deep the pool is.

Swimming improves learning and memory The hippocampus is the part of the brain that controls learning and memory. Studies have found that this part of the brain grows with prolonged and sustained exercise, particularly swimming. The air around a pool is moist and easier to breathe (which can also help asthma sufferers breathe more easily in daily life), and swimming forces regulated breathing.

Swimming — and exercise in general — increases oxygen to the brain, and studies have shown that this can help replace lost brain neurons in the hippocampus.

Swimming helps your state of mind

Swimming helps children in their physical development In 2012, an Australian study of children between the ages of three and five showed that those who started swimming at a young age often reached developmental milestones earlier than average. Swimming uses bilateral, cross-patterning movement, which is the ability to use both sides of the body together in a coordinated way. These movements help develop nerve fibers in the corpus callosum, the part of the brain that connects the two hemispheres. Each brain hemisphere controls one side of the body (right controls left and vice versa), so swimming forces them to work together. Since swimming activates both brain hemispheres and all four lobes at once, it helps develop the brain further and faster. Most of the milestones that were seen earlier by kids who swim young were gross motor (coordination) and fine motor (such as cutting paper and coloring in the lines).

“most people don’t know that swimming can have great benefits to your brain and its functionality.”

The endorphins released during any form of exercise can help anxiety, mood, and stress levels, and the neurons created in the hippocampus can replace those destroyed by depression, which is why swimming is a great way to battle mood disorders. However, swimming has an added element of being very meditative. As you slip into the water, your mood can be lifted just from the feel of the silky coolness on your skin.

As you begin to swim, all external stimuli are shut out and all you are focused on is your body, the bottom of the pool, and counting your laps. The repetitiveness of the strokes and the focus on regulating your breathing add to the meditative state, which makes swimming very soothing and relaxing to the mind.

As if you needed another reason to hit the pool this summer, research is clear — swimming helps the brain at all ages!

Sign your kids up for swim lessons — they are available for kids as young as six months old, and there are many great options in the area, both for private and group lessons. Not only will they learn a life skill and how to be safe around water, but it will help their brain grow and develop. If they already know how to swim, swim teams are a great way for them to make friends, be active, and give their brains a boost while off from school. While the kids are otherwise occupied, hit the lap lanes yourself for an underwater workout and therapy — a healthy, happy parent makes a healthier, happier family!

family: wellness

Let’s Talk About

DOWN SYNDROME by: Jamie Lober The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that about one in every 700 babies in the United States is born with Down syndrome, which makes it the most common chromosomal condition. Sometimes referred to as trisomy 21, Down syndrome is the result of an error in cell division during the early stage of fetal development. According to the National Institutes of Health, Down syndrome is not inherited. People should have two copies of the 21st chromosome, whereas those with Down syndrome have an extra full or partial copy. It is the additional genetic material that changes the way the person with Down syndrome develops and appears. Unfortunately, the cause remains unknown, and Down syndrome does not discriminate — though higher maternal age increases the chance.

Down syndrome is marked by distinct facial features, developmental delays, and below-average intelligence, and can be linked to thyroid or heart issues. The National Down Syndrome Society lists physical traits of Down syndrome, such as low muscle tone, small stature, an upward slant to the eyes, and a single deep crease across the center of the palm — although every person with Down syndrome is unique and does not possess all of these traits.

Sometimes it can help to prepare by finding out if your baby will have Down syndrome through prenatal screenings and diagnostic tests. While they may not give a definitive answer, the screening can reveal probability.

The majority of screenings involve a blood test and ultrasound. The only way to know for certain is by having an amniocentesis during the second trimester. If you wait until the birth, the physical characteristics of the baby can be an indicator. However, a chromosomal analysis called a karyotype will be able to confirm the diagnosis.

It is possible to lead a happy, healthy life with Down syndrome. Kids with Down syndrome are integrated in schools, workplaces, and recreational activities. They have special interests and their own personalities, just like any other child. In the school setting, you can create an individualized education plan where a child with Down syndrome can be in a regular classroom and receive accommodations such as extra time to complete his work. Early intervention is the key.

Services such as speech, occupational, and physical therapy can be immensely beneficial as the child grows and develops. The Down Syndrome Association in Virginia states that their mission is to ensure all individuals with Down syndrome and their families receive the support necessary to participate in, contribute to, and achieve fulfillment of life in their communities.

Special Olympics Virginia has been recognized for decades as an ally to those with Down syndrome. Special Olympics Virginia states that they are a social movement built on inclusion, where every single person is accepted and

welcomed regardless of ability or disability. Their year-round programs help kids develop new interests, build greater self-confidence, form new friendships, and increase athletic ability. They are always looking for athletes, coaches, and volunteers.

One of the best things you can do for your child is be an advocate.

Keep the dialogue open with her teachers, activity directors, and other community resources that help her thrive. The future remains bright for those affected by Down syndrome.

There is a new NIH initiative called INCLUDE (Investigation of Co-occurring Conditions Across the Lifespan to Understand Down syndrome). It was launched in 2018 and has continued to try to find out more about critical health and quality of life needs, with the goal of making new scientific discoveries to improve health, wellbeing, and neurodevelopment of kids with Down syndrome, as well as focus on their risk and resilience to common diseases they share with those who do not have Down syndrome. It is important to stay educated, communicate with your healthcare provider, and be your child’s biggest cheerleader so he can shine.

family: seniors

Giving Your Brain a Boost

by Jamie Lober

One of the best ways to prevent the comfort of your own home. Being Alzheimer’s disease is to give your a nonsmoker and taking charge of the brain a boost. While this sounds like risk for cardiovascular disease and hard work, it can actually be fun to stroke are significant initiatives you incorporate some of the strategies can take for your health. You want to into your daily life. “There is research pay special attention to obesity, high that shows there are absolutely things blood pressure, and diabetes because you can do to lessen your chance of they can all have a negative impact on dementia or make it come later in life your cognitive health. When you take than it would otherwise,” said Mary good care of your heart, your brain will Sandridge, director of communications likely follow. and marketing for the Put safety first.

Central and Western Sandridge said, “Brain There is Virginia Chapter of the injury can raise your Alzheimer’s Association in research that risk of cognitive Roanoke. While you are shows there decline and dementia, preventing Alzheimer’s, you should wear a you’re helping your are absolutely so seat belt, use a helmet general wellbeing at things you can when playing contact the same time. “We’re sports or riding a currently involved in do to lessen bike, and take steps funding a study at Wake your chance of to prevent falls.” You Forest University and may want to talk to University of California dementia your doctor about tips called the U.S. Pointer for fall-proofing your Study, which is changing home, as well as what a healthy diet lifestyle factors such as diet, exercise, would entail that is low in fat and and social interaction to lessen high in fruits and vegetables. Some the occurrence of dementia,” said studies show that the Mediterranean Sandridge. and Mediterranean-DASH (Dietary Remember that it’s never too late or Approaches to Stop Hypertension) diets too soon to add healthy habits into can contribute to risk reduction. your life. Getting moving is an easy Get a good night’s sleep. Not getting way to begin. “Engage in regular enough sleep can lead to problems cardiovascular exercise that elevates with memory and thinking. Keeping your heart rate and increases blood the same sleep and wake time is one flow to the brain and body,” Sandridge helpful strategy, as is creating a cool, said. This prevents cognitive decline. calm environment for sleep. Manage Lifelong learning is another wonderful stress as best you can, as studies link way to keep your mind active. There a history of depression with increased are classes you can take at Virginia risk of cognitive decline. If you have Western, a Roanoke parks and rec depression, anxiety, or other mental community center, or even online in health concerns, there are treatments

Developmental delays, educational labels and auditory processing Come and learn about early, easy signs of developmental delay and auditory training options for children with all kinds of psycho-educational labels.

out there and you should talk the issue over with your doctor. There is no reason to struggle in silence. “Staying socially engaged may support brain health, so you should pursue social activities that are meaningful to you. If you love animals, consider volunteering at a local shelter,” said Sandridge.

Keep your brain stimulated. “Build a piece of furniture, complete a jigsaw puzzle, do something artistic, or play a strategy game, because challenging your mind may have short and longterm benefits for your brain,” said Sandridge. Any health issue like high blood pressure needs to be under control. “Studies show that aggressive treatment of high systolic blood pressure, which is the top number in your blood pressure reading that reflects the levels of pressure on your arteries, reduces the risk of MCI, or Mild Cognitive Impairment,” she said. Make an effort to get screenings as recommended, and know your numbers.

Pay attention to yourself and loved ones. “We are focusing on conversations. When you notice something is not right with a family member, you should talk about it, because early diagnosis is advantageous for a lot of reasons,” said Sandridge. It will also put your mind at ease to no longer wonder what might be wrong. Some people even choose to be a part of Alzheimer’s research with the hope that they’ll protect future generations against the disease. By spreading the word about actions families can take, our community can take a strong stand against Alzheimer’s disease.

Thursday August 1, 7PM Saturday August 3, 10AM

The Sensory Centre 4526 Old Cave Spring Road Cave Spring, VA 24018

540-525-6108 Family/July 2019

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family: holiday

In

your Words

What is your family's Independence Day tradition?

“

We go to the beach every year with our family and always watch fireworks on the beach!

-Mindy Frantz

As a kid, I used to live near the #2 fire station. We would always grab a blanket and sit next to the station and watch all three (Salem, Roanoke, and Vinton) fireworks shows.

Plus, the firefighters always came and hung out with us.

-Shaena Leigh Rausch

Cookout with the family, and then to River’s Edge for fireworks.

-Heather C. Wiggins

Riding our bikes on the greenway to River’s Edge to watch fireworks!

-Josh Eagan (our publisher!)

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Family/July 2019

”

Explore your wild side!

It’s a self-guided family adventure for ages four and up, with progressively challenging aerial obstacles and zip lines guaranteed to provide a thrill like you’ve never experienced.

Visit our website for more info or to reserve your space:

ExplorePark.org/Treetop

NOW OPEN!

Walk-ups are available, but you may experience wait times if the course is full.

Choose from seven different challenge levels and features.

Online booking is available for groups of up to 10. Group discounts available by phone. Book a birthday party on weekends beginning August 3 starting at $220.

Just off Blue Ridge Parkway, Milepost 115 Questions? Call (540) 427-1800

2.5 Hours

Ages 4-6 Ages 7-11 Ages 12-17 Ages 18+

$15 $22 $29 $35

Treetop Quest uses a state-ofthe-art continuous belay system to guarantee the safety of our participants. It’s impossible to detach while traveling throughout between obstacles.

This unique clip and harness allows for participants as young as age four to enjoy the course.

SAFETY

www.SplashValleyWaterPark.com

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