How your brain responds to change Online dating in the age of longevity Fearless Creativity
O RD I NARY PEO PLE LIVI N G E X TR AO RD I NARY LIVE S
The CoMindfulness Project Practice compassion to increase happiness
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CONTENTS 88
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features 44
SLOW AND STEADY PROGRESS
How your brain responds to change
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THE CO-MINDFULNESS PROJECT
Practice compassion to increase happiness for yourself and others
special section: book excerpt GROWING BOLDER: DEFY THE CULT OF YOUTH, LIVE WITH PASSION AND PURPOSE 42 THE ART OF THE GROWING BOLDER COMEBACK
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A playbook for active longevity
Winter 20
in every issue
finance
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NOTE FROM THE CEO
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CONTRIBUTORS
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PUTTING TOGETHER YOUR RETIREMENT PAYCHECK
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YOUR TAKE
Making the money last as long as you do
Readers weigh in on ‘OK, Boomer’
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GROWING BOLDER WITH
Big names, bold lives
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TRANSLATING TECH
Online dating in the age of longevity
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5 QUESTIONS
Going vegan-ish is easier than you may think
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GB BOOK REVIEWS
Suggested reading for lifelong learners and bibliophiles
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THE TAKEAWAY
Still sailing solo
defy 13
AN OPEN LETTER TO THOSE BORN AFTER 1965
What both sides get wrong about "OK, Boomer"
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KEEP DREAMING
Your evolving definition of success
travel 18
ACOUSTICS IN THE CANYON
Exploring the iconic Red Rocks Amphitheatre, nature's concert hall
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TOUR PORTUGAL
A seven-day itinerary
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NO EXCUSES
He quit working to start living
connect 26
BRING JOY TO THE PROCESS OF CHANGE
Create positive habits with behaviorchange strategies
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DEFY!
The lasting legacy of Wendy Chioji
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THE CO-MINDFULNESS PROJECT
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CAREER REINVENTION
Entering academia at midlife as a new Ph.D. graduate
Practice compassion to increase happiness for yourself and others
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DO I HAVE WHAT IT TAKES AT 60?
Asking the risk-takers
heal 16
AN EXPLOSION OF FLAVORS
Add some flair to your food
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SLOW AND STEADY PROGRESS
How your brain responds to change
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WINDOW TO THE HEART
How an eye doctor saved her life
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BETTER LIVING THROUGH BETTER SEX
Holistic benefits of regular sex
move 57
HEART OF A CHAMPION
From cardiac patient to world powerlifting champion
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A LEGACY OF HEALTH Three generations of fitness
create 37
FEARLESS CREATIVITY
Willingness to be a beginner
Follow Us @GrowingBolder
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NOTE FROM THE CEO
My Favorite Word Can Slow Down Time
Marc Middleton and colleague Wendy Chioji relaxing on the set. Wendy inspired people worldwide with her ability to live in the moment and DEFY expectations throughout a decade long battle with incurable cancer. Her inspiring story begins on page 50.
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THERE IS ONLY THIS MOMENT
and it expands or contracts according to mindfulness.
If you’re a fan of “The Actors Studio” TV show, you likely remember James Lipton’s questionnaire at the end of each interview. (Lipton, 93, retired as host and executive producer of the Emmy Award-winning show at the end of 2018.) He would ask every guest the same 10 questions, and the first one was always, "What is your favorite word?" The most common answer was “love” which, admittedly, is a great word. My favorite word changes frequently, but lately it’s been “mindful.” To me, mindful is simply recognizing and appreciating the never-ending novelty in each and every moment. I like it because I need a constant reminder to stop, look, listen, feel and mostly, appreciate. Mindfulness is a cornerstone of gratitude, which, in turn, is the basis of happiness. Being mindful is not only an important key to enjoying life but also to slowing the passage of time. How many times have you said lately, where did the time go? Doesn’t it seem as you get older, time passes more quickly? Of course, time moves at exactly the same pace that it did when we were kids, but our perception of time does change as we age. It changes because of a lack of novelty. It changes because we’ve been there and done that. And the mind, in its never-ending need to recognize, categorize and dismiss anything that is non-threatening, switches on a kind of autopilot that keeps us from fully experiencing the moment. Neuroscientists tell us that paying close attention to the here and now actually slows down our brain's perception
of time because we are processing more input. The more familiar each moment is, the less information our brains process and the more quickly time seems to pass. Being mindful is simply making a conscious effort to turn off the autopilot that short-circuits our powers of observation and prevents us from recognizing and appreciating the never-ending novelty in each and every moment. As we all know, but few fully grasp, there is only this moment; and it expands or contracts according to our mindfulness. Live as if each moment is unique and will never happen again. Because it is and it won’t. Don’t get caught in the trap of always looking forward to the end of the day, the upcoming weekend, your next vacation or retirement. Don’t just make friends with the present, luxuriate in the present. Celebrate the present, because tomorrow doesn’t exist except in our minds. Life only happens in the present, and you must be present to win. That doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t be preparing for the future or planning for what’s next; but while we’re doing it, we have to learn to be mindful. Otherwise we’ll always be wondering, “Where did the time go?”
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YOURTAKE I’ve been teaching an undergrad course, Generational Differences in the Workplace, for many years. The OK Boomer retort may be new, but the sentiment is not. This — “time for you to go/time for you to grow up” — division among the generations has been ongoing throughout modern times. It’s normal, but it doesn’t have to be divisive. It takes personal connection that leads to mutual respect to change those beliefs. I require my students to conduct interviews with members of each of the four generations in the workplace (yes, many people of the Silent or Traditionalist generation are still employed). It never fails to change their minds. So I urge older Americans to meet the younger generations where they are and where you are — volunteering for the issues that matter to you. It will change them and it will change you.
Dismiss me at your peril. I am old and I know stuff.
What is your reaction to the ‘OK, Boomer’ meme?
Ok, Boomer is NOT about age but about entitlement. It can be used for anyone acting like they are "owed," including "owed" information. (For example, someone who won't just google something to find a quick answer.)
Janet Egiziano Moorpark, CA
Christine Obenreder Serfozo
Erie, Pennsylvania
Joyce Corey Lennoxville, Quebec
Just more divisive FB crap.
Angelo Castelli Copiague, NY
In this context Boomer does not refer to age, but to a mindset.
Patricia Willis Kemp
Colorado Springs, CO
Teresa Peacock
Santa Barbara, CA
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Here's my take. Lighten up. It is hilarious IMO. I love being a boomer, and I am bossy and opinionated. I can relate to both sides and I don't mind push-back.
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OK BOO
MER Growing Bolder Responds to ‘OK, Boomer’ Meme
An open letter to those born between 1965 and 2013: I’m on your side, and I was born in 1951. Marc Middleton
F E AT U R E
I’ve been asked recently by more than one media organization to weigh in on the “OK, Boomer” issue. Of course, the request is little more than a lightly veiled effort to sow more seeds of division in an already divided culture, to pit an entire demographic cohort against another for the amusement of readers or viewers. Yes, please. Let me participate in a deeply polarized debate in which facts don’t matter and let me be misquoted by someone only interested in “a good story.”
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Let’s acknowledge that every demographic cohort has self-centered, materialistic, resource hoarders as well as compassionate, creative, empathetic, thoughtful stewards of the planet. It’s not when you were born. It’s who you are. But now that an AARP senior vice president has offered the tone-deaf response, “OK, Millennials, but we’re the people that actually have the money,” I feel compelled to weigh in. Her comment was tone deaf because it totally ignores serious, legitimate concerns and because the boomer demographic is, in many ways, the most diverse of all time, containing wealth and poverty, health and sickness. And that’s just the beginning of the extreme differences in this and every other demographic cohort. Her answer simply reinforced the out-of-touch stereotype that’s being put forth by the “OK, Boomer” movement. In the unlikely event that you somehow missed the story that is igniting generational warfare, because the media continues throwing gasoline on it, here’s a short summary: “OK, Boomer” has become a flippant and dismissive response from Generation Z and millennials who see baby boomers — those born between 1946 and 1964 — as out of touch. It’s a bit more than the latest version of “whatever.” It’s demeaning shorthand for, “You’re a narrow-minded, self-centered, a**hole.” Don’t believe in climate change? “OK, Boomer.” Think all young people are lazy and lack ambition? “OK, Boomer.” Social scientists tell us that we’re actually hardwired
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to make snap judgments about others based solely upon how they look. This self-preservation mechanism originated hundreds of thousands of years ago when our survival was dependent upon first impressions. Friend or foe? Help or hurt? Fight or flight? Unfortunately, for some, this biological imperative has devolved into an excuse for ignorance and a justification for bigotry. Stereotyping is something in which some people of all ages, races, genders, socio-economic status, sexual preferences and religious backgrounds engage. It’s an equal opportunity human character flaw that we can no longer afford. The world is too interconnected and resources are too limited for an “us vs. them” mentality. The ripples of alienation spread quickly. To make this latest intergenerational smackdown something that can grab and hold our increasingly divided attention, the media is only too happy to paint both sides with a single brush. Anyone who does this — no matter their age — is ignorant. And any media organization that does it is irresponsible. I will be the first to agree that there is truth to the litany of complaints that Gen Z, Gen X and millennials are expressing. There are far too many men and women boomers who deny climate change, who care more
about their financial security than that of their grandchildren and who behave selfishly in nearly every aspect of their lives. But there are also many of us who agree that rising student debt, political corruption, economic inequality and leaving behind a planet that’s choking on man-made pollution are disastrous for everyone. It’s also important to remember that many born between 1946 and 1964 have waged war for decades on gender equality, civil rights, gay rights, equal pay and access for those with disabilities. And now we’re fighting ageism. Let’s acknowledge that every demographic cohort has self-centered, materialistic, resource hoarders as well as compassionate, creative, empathetic, thoughtful stewards of the planet. It’s not when you were born. It’s who you are. The answer to today’s serious problems is not generation shaming. It’s the exact opposite. It’s ignoring generational branding altogether, which is why Growing Bolder refrains from using the words “baby boomer.” It’s not that we’re afraid of it. It’s simply that it’s a very poor descriptor, a convenient and gross generalization that has no real value. Our mission is not focused on any demographic cohort. We’re focused on providing the inspiration, tools and resources to help anyone figure out what’s next in their life. We’re focused on educating adults of all ages about an entirely new life stage that offers the opportunity to live with passion, purpose and significance for two or three decades beyond what’s considered normal retirement age. And, yes, we’re fighting for the right to continue contributing. This is not simply a selfish desire. It’s an effort to change outdated norms. It’s great news for everyone of every age because it will benefit every older person, of every generation, forever. We’re proud and grateful that we have a large and passionate following among younger women and men. They bring great value, insight and energy to our movement, which is also their movement because growing older is something we’re all doing, if we’re lucky. I don’t want to be the guy that tells young people to get off my lawn. I want to be the guy that invites them inside. I need them. I am energized by them. I am inspired by them. And I believe I have something to share with them. Together we’re much stronger. Only together can we effectively attack the issues that result in unfairness and inequity. Only together can we battle corporate greed, polarized politics and selfish behavior. The power of intergenerational connection and cooperation is limitless. Generational name calling, in an effort to sell merchandise or newspapers, is “small ball.” It’s for little minds. To paint everyone within a demographic cohort with the same brush is as ridiculous, damaging, dangerous and ignorant as saying all men are misogynists, all immigrants are criminals or all police are corrupt. Empathy for others and the desire to do the right thing are not qualities exclusive to any generation. They are qualities expressed by many in all generations. They are the glue that holds society together. It’s not easy to be an older adult in today’s society. It’s not easy to be a young adult in today’s society. We are natural allies because no one, no matter their age, has the right to hoard resources and opportunity. And everyone, no matter his or her age, has the right to work and grow. There are serious issues that need big solutions. Passive-aggressive, sarcastic, flippant behavior won’t solve anything. What it will do is what it’s doing right now: sell a few T-shirts and newspapers. Let’s start looking for the good in others — no matter what generation they happened to be born into. Let’s start working together instead of letting small minds and big newspapers divide us. Ok, Boomer?
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Kay Van Norman
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Deagreez / iStock / Getty Images Plus
BRING JOY TO THE PROCESS OF CHANGE
Chances are the desire for a more joyful life is at the core of most
resolutions. What if instead of setting overly high expectations for specific changes, (complete with a high probability of failure), we consider how a focus on joy might help us reach desired goals? Taking time to consider what we are grateful for, what we appreciate about ourselves and what we’d like to experience in life can support the process of change. B E H AV I O R - C H A N G E R E S E A R C H D E S C R I B E S A R EC O G N I Z A B L E F I V E - S TAG E PAT T E R N TO C H A N G I N G
If you made New Year’s resolutions, was one of them to experience more joy?
A B E H AV I O R , I N C LU D I N G ;
1. Pre-contemplation (not even thinking about changing a behavior). 2. Contemplation (“I probably should change this behavior”). 3. Preparation (“I’m gathering information about making the change”). 4. Action (“I’m taking steps to change”). 5. Maintenance (“I’ve changed the behavior for the better”). Two of these stages — contemplation and preparation — largely feed the multi-billion-dollar infomercial industry hawking nutritional supplements, fitness equipment and so-called miracle, instant-lifeenhancers as people dance between these two stages but find themselves unable to move into sustained action.
Plans and Positive Health Habits
Why is it so difficult to move into action and maintenance, especially when trying to adopt a new healthy habit, even when we have the desire? Changing attitudes and expectations around aging and wellness is a critical first step — so is creating a vitality plan and making regular vitality deposits. But I think something else is working under the surface to derail positive change.
Goals Versus ‘Shoulds’
Often when we have a goal in mind — get stronger, lose 15 pounds, get more organized, clear out clutter — it becomes a chore on our long list of “shoulds.” My friend, Chris, often says, “Stop ‘shoulding’ all over yourself.” It always brings a laugh, but it also merits some thought. When a goal sits in the “should” category, there’s little chance you’ll feel committed to the steps necessary to accomplish that goal. In fact, it’s more likely to become demoralizing rather than motivating. For example, many people are in a perpetual state of “I should lose 15 pounds.” Have you ever heard the phrase, “You wouldn’t weigh as much if you got off your own back?” That’s another one of Chris’ favorite sayings! I’m not advocating for giving up on self-improvement; but when self-improvement is so continuously difficult to accomplish that it mocks you at every turn, then perhaps it’s time to step back and look at your persistent list of “shoulds.”
F E AT U R E
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Free Writing for Insights
Consider writing each “should” at the top of a page — a separate page for each one. Then free write down why this item is on your list. (Free writing is the process of writing without stopping and without regard to the usual rules of writing.) Don’t spend time crafting the reasons. Instead, just write words and phrases that relate to why this item is on your list. Next, free write about why you think it’s been so difficult to accomplish this particular goal. When you made attempts to achieve this goal, how long did the effort usually last? What stopped you in the past? What stopped you from just erasing it from your list? Again, this isn’t an essay so don’t try to make it pretty. Just write words and phrases that reveal motivations for this goal and barriers to making it happen. N OW F R E E W R I T E A B O U T:
1. How you would feel and what would change in your life if you accomplished this goal? 2. How you would feel and what would change in your life if you didn’t accomplish this goal? 3. How you would feel and what would change in your life if you simply erased it from your list completely? This process can help you identify what things on your persistent selfimprovement list are actually goals that you want to pursue and which ones simply landed there by default as a “should.”
A Deliberate Shift
Consider whittling down your list to things that truly matter. Look at your free writing for clues and pay close attention to how you feel about a particular goal and specific actions that would take you towards that goal. Does it feel like a chore? Do the actions feel forced? Change is often uncomfortable and certainly more difficult than just staying the same, so look for ways to bring joy to the process. Without a sense of joy and opportunities for fun along the path, goals can stall permanently. So, consider engaging a friend or family member to work together towards a goal, and figure out ways to turn the desired actions into a game. For example, I made a pact with a friend who lives two states away to “virtually walk” toward each other. We picked a route and a place to meet in the middle, decided how many minutes of physical activity equaled how many miles of “walking” and then we agreed to text each other daily to share our progress. It was fun to connect regularly (even if to say “I ran into the ditch today – will do better tomorrow”). And it was motivating, because both of us wanted to do our part to meet in the middle.
Position of Strength
Finally, take time to celebrate the things you love about yourself, right now — today — so you can start any type of change from a position of strength. Plan for joy and fun as you take small steps toward your goals. Life is far too short, and joy far too important, to squander on “shoulds.”
Visit the Ignite Personal Vitality and Articles & Resources tabs at kayvannorman.com to download the Vitality Portfolio® Starter Toolkit and other free resources to support positive lifestyle changes.
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Plan for joy and fun as you take small steps toward your goals.
EMBODY JOY TO HELP CULTIVATE IT FOR CHANGE Bringing joy to the process of change can make it more enjoyable for yourself and others. But what exactly does joy mean to you? Take a few minutes to close your eyes, breath deeply and reflect on the joy in your life. Think about what has brought you joy at different stages of life, with others and by yourself.
1. Does gratitude for specific things in your life help you feel joy?
4. How can you actively cultivate more joy in your life based on your reflections?
2. Can you physically feel joy in your body when you recall a joyful memory? If so, where in your body do you feel it?
5. In what ways can you bring that sense of joy to pursuing your goals?
3. What do your most joyful memories have in common?
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CO-MINDFULNESS
Co-mindfulness is about bringing our attention, integrity and compassion to our relationships and into our communities to nurture more love in our life and to thrive. Co-mindfulness recognizes that our individual growth only becomes meaningful in how it lifts up the lives of others. It’s about the healing, happiness and sense of fulfillment that we can experience when practicing mindfulness together.
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THE COMINDFULNESS PROJECT Practice compassion to increase happiness for yourself and others Doro Bush Koch and Tricia Reilly Koch
THE STORY BEHIND THE CO-MINDFULNESS PROJECT
Niccoló Pontigia / EyeEm via Getty Images
CONNECT
This year, we started working on a book that will feature interviews about the different ways to practice mindfulness — spending time in nature, listening to music, engaging in a creative project. The aim of the book is to help people, who might not be drawn to meditation, find ways to practice mindfulness that appeal to them to increase their happiness and sense of wellbeing. For the book, we had the great privilege of interviewing His Holiness the Dalai Lama. When we asked him what was the best way to practice mindfulness, to our surprise, his answer was not meditation but compassion. The Dalai Lama’s answer had us wondering if the mindfulness movement might be putting too much emphasis on our individual happiness and wellbeing and not enough on the wellbeing and happiness of others. During this time, we also met Amma, who is known throughout the world as the hugging saint. We were deeply moved by Amma’s life of service and her message and example of unconditional love. And we definitely recommend her hugs. What we noticed about these two great spiritual teachers was that their love and compassion for others seemed to give them an awful lot of joy. Was this the real secret of mindfulness and how to achieve happiness and a sense of wellbeing — focusing our attention and love a little less on ourselves and more on others? As the Dalai Lama has so famously said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” Practicing compassion, as it turns out, is one of the best ways to invest in our own happiness. And so, we started asking ourselves: How can we practice mindfulness with others to cultivate more love and compassion? That question led us to the concept of co-mindfulness, which we define as bringing our attention, integrity and compassion to our relationships to nurture more love in our lives and to thrive. G R O W I N G B O L D E R / VO L . 3 9
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1 DEEP LISTENING.
Deep listening is about making ourselves fully available to another person. When we listen deeply, we listen to the person’s emotions as well as their words. Instead of responding with our own story or thoughts to what the person is telling us, we ask questions that draw the person out to forge a deeper understanding and intimacy. The more we practice deep listening with the people in our lives, the more we show them our understanding and love, the more we will be loved and understood in return.
2 PAYING CLOSE ATTENTION.
Mindfulness is about bringing our full attention to the present moment. In co-mindfulness, we bring our full attention to another person. We pay attention to the person’s body language, tone of voice, what they’re not saying. We also pay attention to our own thoughts and feelings as we engage with the person. When we pay close attention, we are essentially in meditation with another person, observing with compassion what comes up for them as well as for us.
3 LEADING WITH CURIOSITY NOT JUDGMENT.
In co-mindfulness, we reject our automatic default mode with people. Instead, we stay open and curious to everyone with whom we come into contact, even the people we know well. By leading with curiosity instead of with judgment, our relationships become creative spaces where we can be taken by surprise, learn about ourselves and others, explore new levels of intimacy and be inspired to grow.
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THE 10 PRINCIPLES OF CO-MINDFULNESS:
4 LETTING GO OF EXPECTATIONS.
Often, what harms our relationships most are the expectations we have of people. And yet, mindfulness is at the heart of accepting what is, which includes accepting the people in our lives for who they are. In co-mindfulness, we strive to love the people in our lives for who they are all the while gently helping them be the best that they can be. Our expectations won’t change people, but our love might.
5 COMMITTING TO THE TRUTH.
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A mindful relationship is committed to the truth, even when the truth might be uncomfortable for us. Don’t ignore difficult emotions you might be having with someone. Find a kind way to express, in the moment, how the person’s actions are making you feel. And remember, the truth goes both ways. Be prepared to listen, with patience and kindness, to the person’s experience of your actions.
INVITING CRITICISM.
None of us is perfect. While this shouldn’t be an excuse for bad behavior, it’s important to acknowledge that we all make mistakes. Our relationships offer us the best opportunity to learn from our mistakes and grow. So, be proactive and invite the criticism by asking, “Have I said something to hurt or offend you?” The worst that can happen is the person says yes. The best that can happen is you learn from the experience and grow closer.
CONNECT
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BREATHING TO AVOID REACTING.
CIRCLING BACK TO COMPASSION.
Just like we use our breath when meditating to focus our minds, we can use our breath to regulate our anxiety and other difficult emotions to be in the present moment with another person. You’re walking into a big meeting, stop for a moment and breathe. Your child is on the attack and pushing all your buttons, breathe. Let your breath keep you centered and prevent you from reacting without thinking.
We make a huge mistake when we treat our relationships as a means to an end. In co-mindfulness, our compassion drives our relationships, not our self-interest. Instead of asking ourselves, “What am I getting from this person?” we ask ourselves, “What can I give this person? What does this person need?” We do this from a place of strength, knowing that the more care and compassion we show others, the happier and more confident we become.
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MAINTAINING OUR INTEGRITY.
CONNECTING WITH LOVE.
Co-mindfulness is a deeply giving practice. However, at no point does giving generously of ourselves involve compromising our integrity or core values. If someone is mistreating you or acting in ways that don’t align with your core values, it’s important to speak up. If the person still fails to meet you, then it might be time to walk away. Remaining true to who you are is key to a mindful relationship.
We wait for the day when love will sweep us off our feet. But we do love and ourselves a great disservice when we limit love to a romantic experience between two people. Love isn’t something that happens to us, it’s a choice. We don’t wait for love, we give love. Love isn’t limited to two people or even a small group of people. In co-mindfulness, we recognize love as a powerful force for change in our world and consciously choose to create sparks of love with every person we meet.
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BBR CONSULTING
BBR Consulting’s co-founders have been students of mindfulness for over 25 years. Fifteen years ago, they launched Bright, Bold & Real Consulting with the simple mission of sharing with people how best to take care of themselves through mind, body and spirit. As part of that mission, they created an annual Achieving Optimal Health Conference, which is in its ninth year. They also created the podcast, HEALTHGIG, in which they interview inspirational people about their personal journeys to health and wellness. In the company’s Co-Mindfulness Project, people put co-mindfulness principles into practice with a relationship in their life that they would like to improve. Readers can join by simply signing up on the company’s website (www.bbrconsulting.us). Results from the project will be included in a forthcoming book about co-mindfulness. HARVARD STUDY ON LONGEVITY AND JOY
A 75-year old study by Harvard University recently revealed that the key to a long and happy life is not money, success or fame. It is good relationships. Having people in your life on whom you can rely helps your nervous system relax, helps your brain stay healthier and reduces emotional and physical pain. How many relationships you have is not what matters. What matters is the quality of those relationships.
DORO BUSH KOCH Doro Bush Koch is co-founder of BB&R Wellness Consulting. She has managed the demands of being the daughter and sister of two U.S. presidents by practicing mindfulness. It has had such a positive impact on Bush’s life that she has spent the last two decades sharing the power of this ancient practice with others through her meditation CDs and at wellness conferences.
TRICIA REILLY KOCH Tricia Reilly Koch is co-founder of BB&R Wellness Consulting. She was introduced to the world of holistic health and meditation through her maternal grandmother. Driven by a lifelong passion to understand the mind-body connection, she is a certified holistic health coach, a student of ayurvedic living and a wellness entrepreneur.
WHY JOIN THE BBR CO-MINDFULNESS PROJECT?
We need to pay more attention to our relationships and increase the love and connection we have with people for our happiness and wellbeing. We also believe, as the lives of the Dalai Lama and Amma have shown us, that our individual growth only becomes meaningful in how it lifts up the lives of others. Co-mindfulness is about the healing, happiness and sense of fulfillment that we can experience when we practice mindfulness with each other. We hope you’ll join us in this new and exciting movement. — Doro Bush and Tricia Reilly, Co-Founders of BBR Consulting
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THE CO-MINDFULNESS PROJECT Is compassion the key to happiness?
The concept of co-mindfulness refers to bringing our attention, integrity and compassion to our relationships to nurture more love in our lives and to thrive. Our individual growth only becomes meaningful in how it lifts up the lives of others. It’s about the healing, happiness and sense of fulfillment that we can experience when practicing mindfulness together. Review the principles below and reflect on the relationships in your own life.
The 10 Principles of Co-Mindfulness
3. Which relationship would you most like to improve by practicing co-mindfulness?
1. Deep listening 2. Paying close attention. 3. Leading with curiosity not judgment. 4. Letting go of expectations. 5. Committing to the truth. 6. Inviting criticism. 7. Breathing to avoid reacting. 8. Circling back to compassion. 9. Maintaining our integrity. 10. Connecting with love.
1. With whom do you currently have the most mindful relationship?
4. Would joining the free, guided Co-Mindfulness Project help you stay accountable to yourself as you work to improve this difficult relationship?
Join The Co-Mindfulness Project. It’s free! REAL PEOPLE. REAL DATA. LEARNING TOGETHER.
2. Is there a challenging relationship(s) in your life?
If you are interested in actively improving an important relationship in your life using the co-mindfulness principles, join our citizen science project. We believe that together, we can generate the knowledge and power to enact real change in our lives and in the lives of others. Sign up at bbrconsulting.us/comindfulness
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