kids

c2c kids

ages 6-7

Pastime Passion: Finding the Right Activity for Your Child

By KElly goEDE

Although schools do an excellent job at providing varied learning experiences for our children, many times parents seek to enhance their children’s afterschool time with activities that allow them to flex their creative muscles or their real ones.

Whether it’s sports, music, dance or other fun and enriching pursuits, parents have myriad choices and it can be tricky finding the right activity to energize their child and build her self-esteem. The process can involve some trial and error, as it’s inevitably messy letting children dabble in activities their friends like but about which they know nothing. It can also be costly and time-consuming, as finding your child’s passion isn’t a direct route. But when you find the right fit for your child, the benefits are priceless.

As a former dance instructor, I could think of nothing better than to enroll my oldest daughter in ballet at the tender age of 3, and I deluded myself into thinking that this was my daughter’s and my shared passion. It wasn’t. Every year after that she would begin dance instruction and only last a few months, begging me to quit and I’d let her. Fast forward to this year and we tried gymnastics. The “aha” moment I was looking for in dance happened for my daughter as she was in her gymnastics class. She LOVES going each week. My lesson? I really had to learn to tune into her needs and desires instead of pushing my own agenda. Teaching my daughter to follow her own interests was a nice ancillary benefit to her bolstered self-esteem and healthy body she achieved through gymnastics. Parenting is challenging, including finding what makes your child tick and how to bring out the best in her. And what works for one child may not work for her sibling. As a parent, you have to start somewhere and gauging your child’s interest may provide clues to a good fit for a sport or activity, but many times it’s hit or miss. Signing up for a class with friends may help your child feel more comfortable if she is feeling apprehensive, and allow her to fully experience it and decide for herself if she truly enjoys going.

When looking at your options, ask yourself what the ultimate goal is for your child: • A healthy body and body image? • Honed art or music skills? • Experience in a new sport or activity? • An overall better sense of self?

If at any time your child is not experiencing your intended goals, an honest conversation is in order to find out if she does not want to continue because of the skill itself, or if something else is going on. 

Kelly's Tip!

Listening to your child and allowing her to weigh in on the decisions of where and how she spends her time will allow her to feel she is being heard and that her opinion is valued. And even when quitting an activity means forfeiting a deposit or the fee for a uniform, if your child is truly done, then consider allowing her to gracefully exit. Your indignation over the cost will not magically change her mind. Cut your losses and have good, open discussions with your child before entering into a new activity.