Get it Magazine February 2018

February 2018

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OVARIAN CANCER On how they tackle life together and keep the sparks flying

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Contents 12

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47

OPEN 7 DAYS 9.30AM TO 5PM

32 Masthead Way, The Marine Village, Sanctuary Cove • Phone 55778981

FEATURES 12 18 29 30 32 36 45

Chloe: The ups, downs & inside outs The other woman The Wrong Time Judith’s ovarian cancer fight Good vibes A sisterhood of success Valentine's day with a difference

REGULARS 8 Get out and about 9 Get to the point 10 GC Outfit of the day 11 Giveaways 20 We love

February 2018

take me

22 Beauty, hair and makeup 33 Man speak 40 Recipes 44 Dining 46 Get scene 49 Stars 50 Last word

M A G A Z I N E

THE OTHER

WOMAN

WE HEAR FROM WOMEN WHO HAVE SLEPT WITH MARRIED MEN

Love Sex Desire Adult toys, food porn, slinky lingerie, sexy date ideas & more!

SANCTUARY RESORT SHOPPE

OVARIAN CANCER

Quay Street, Sanctuary Cove Open 9.30am – 5pm daily P 5577 8288

February 2018

On how they tackle life together and keep the sparks flying

4

fighter

One brave Gold Coaster shares her journey with us

COVER: Chloe and Mat dressed in fashions from The Marine Village 4601 Masthead Way Sanctuary Cove Hope Island QLD P. (07) 5577 6500

From the publisher

ARIAS ON THE GREEN Links Hope Island presents

February, the month of love Can you remember as a child opening your school locker or school bag to find a secret note or card with no name, just the words, 'from your Valentine'?

You searched and inquired for days as to who this mysterious admirer could be… you secretly dreamed that it was the cute guy from gym class — not a chance, but you always hoped it would be him. (It usually turned out to be the freaky guy on your bus.) When you think about it though, it was still nice to have the excitement of knowing someone, somewhere was thinking about you.

In the world of instant gratification we live in, do we still have time for romance? Do we still love the intrigue or mystery of a true Valentine? Are we able to enjoy the thrill of it or do we have to know now who it was from?

I received a beautiful bunch of anonymous flowers one year simply to say that I was loved (I found out later that my daughter had sent them to me). Who says it must be a wayward lover or admirer? Can it not be the ones around you that send you an ‘I care about you’ token?

In saying this, I do however love the excuse to host an ‘I hate Valentine’s Day’ get together with my other single girlfriends. It gives us all a very good reason to eat pizza, drink wine and bitch about men. It doesn’t have to be, “Woe is me, we are independent females that don’t need a Valentine”; it can just be about spending time with each other because we are grateful for each other.

Sidenote: Hallmark cards are cool, but only if some of the words have been changed in black texta to reflect the ‘real you’. Flowers can also genuinely earn brownie points but they need to be your favourites, not the Coles $5 bunch he grabbed on the way home. You also might want to put a note on the fridge the day before Valentines Day, as inevitably he will have forgotten what day it is.

So ladies, love who you love on a daily basis, appreciate those who make you happy, and be their Valentine everyday — no card needed.

Cirque de la Opera

Date: Saturday, 24th March 2018 Time: Gates open 6pm - performance from 7pm General Admission: Free VIP Experience: $110 per person

Experience an exciting and thrilling performance, Cirque de la Opera. Combining beautiful music, inspiring fire and dance routines, talented singers and aerial circus – this will be a truly unique evening that will leave audience members of all ages captivated. Join us for an outstanding and enthralling cultural event for the whole family, with a program full of variety. The cast for this spectacular evening of entertainment will feature Australian & International performers.

Bring your picnic rug, family and friends and enjoy a fully choreographed, show stopping performance under the stars in the spectacular grounds of Links Hope Island Golf Club.

Pre performance and interval, a selection of gourmet food and beverages for purchase.

The gala performance will finish with a spectacular fireworks display courtesy of Skylighter Fireworx!

VIP Experience available from $110 per person. Includes: premium seating, food & beverage package. Bookings are essential. Payment required at time of booking.

Strictly NO BYO food or beverages.

Leanne Hart

For information contact the Events Department 07 5530 9048 or email events@linkshopeisland.com.au

Publishers Indemnity: Those who make advertising placements and/or supply copy material or editorial submissions to Get it Magazine, undertake to ensure that all such material does not infringe any copyright, trademark, defamation, libel, slander or title, breach of confidence, does not contain anything obscene or indecent, or does not infringe the Trade Practices Act or other laws, regulations or statutes. Further to the above mentioned these persons agree to indemnify the publisher and/or its agents against any investigations, claims or judgements. In this magazine we have listed a range of products, prices and stores in across Australia and online. Although prices are correct at the time of printing, they are indicative only as prices and stock may vary from store to store. All prices were provided to Get it Magazine by relevant retailers and suppliers. We advise you to contact the relevant retailers for further information about price and availability. Get it Magazine does not accept any responsibility for price variations, availability or quality of products.

5

Springfield Drive, Hope Island, QLD 4212 www.linkshopeisland.com.au

February 2018

The Get it girls < PUBLISHER Leanne Hart leanne@getit-magazine.com.au

EDITOR > Kirstin Cuthbert editor@getit-magazine.com.au

< ART DIRECTOR Aimi Hart aimi@getit-magazine.com.au

DIGITAL > MARKETING MANAGER Hayley Bogaard admin@getit-magazine.com.au

< FASHION + STYLING Susie McWatt Forbes susiethestylist@gmail.com

CONTRIBUTORS Anna Davies | Ash Palmero | Cassandra Tyndall | Beau Cook| Caillin Palmero | Crystal Dawson | Hayley Bogaard | Sarah Blinco

PARTNERS Renee Bisley Photography

EDITORIAL ENQUIRIES info@getit-magazine.com.au

SALES ENQUIRIES sales@getit-magazine.com.au 0414 946 361

PRINTING Fast Proof Press, Nerang, Queensland

GET IT MAGAZINE PO Box 7602, GCMC QLD 9726 P: 1300 858 932 E: info@getit-magazine.com.au W: getitmagazine.com.au February 2018

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Quote Get it when you buy your car from Grand Motors Toyota this month for your Free Valentines Pack!

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GET OUTAND ABOUT in February

Send your event to editor@getit-magazine.com.au

SAND SAFARI 9-25 FEB Over 17 days the Surfers Paradise foreshore will be brought to life with sand and sea inspired art and sculptures. With sand art activities and workshops, there’s something for the whole family. surfersparadise.com

OUR LAND PEOPLE STORIES 23-24 FEB Showcasing the infinite stories of Australia’s cultural heritage, the Bangarra Dance Theatre will present three personal and profound dance works that you won’t want to miss out on seeing. theartscentregc.com.au

VALENTINE’S DAY AT THE LONESTAR TAVERN 14 FEB Win the Ultimate Weekend Getaway this Valentines Day simply by dining at the Lonestar Tavern. By enjoying a main meal you’ll go in the draw to win a one night stay in a Superior King Room at Quality Hotel Mermaid Waters, buffet breakfast for two, picnic basket including a bottle of house sparkling wine and a fruit plate on arrival. lonestartavern.com.au RAMSAY HEALTH CARE TRIATHLON PINK 18 FEB Calling all ladies who have ever wanted to participate in a triathlon but have been too nervous to do so: Triathlon Pink is for you! Open to children aged 7-14, and women of all ages, it’s a fun morning out to raise awareness and funds for the National Breast Cancer Foundation. triathlonpink.com.au

WIT MARCH BREAKFAST 2 MARCH Arrive bright and early at the Mercure Gold Coast Resort for this month’s Women in Tourism breakfast.

The keynote speaker will be announced closer to the date but the five-minute speaker will be Gordon Kerr from Duffy Down Under, a self-drive electric boat hire and cruise company for Marina Mirage and Sanctuary Cove. womenintourism.org.au

The Drowning Prevention and Learn to Swim Experts • 25 HEATED Indoor Pool • Specialist Learn to Swim Babies to Adults • Stroke Correction • Swim Squads • Lap Swimming, Adult Aqua & Fitness Squads • FREE Baby Program*

February 2018

8

Call us for our FREE Trial and FREE Swimming Assessment at your closest centre!

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GET TO THE POINT

How to go the ‘distance’ with Anna Davies

Valentine’s Day on the water!

recently started a long-distance relationship. I know what you are thinking… I must be crazy. You’re right. I am. The thing is, it’s pretty hard not to go a bit crazy when you rely on the NBN’s internet connection as the cornerstone of your relationship. If you are in a long-distance relationship, and ready to accept your inevitable descent into madness, then you might find these tips handy.

Alfresco Waterfront Dining Full A-la-carte menu

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Petting animals is known to relieve loneliness and stress, so why not pet every dog you see? And I mean. Every. Dog. You. See. Take this classic example:

Don’t miss out

Just the other day I was walking home when from across the street I spotted a dog inside a hairdressers. Do I take a picture from afar? No. Do I leave the poor animal alone? No. Of course not. I cross the street, walk into the hairdressers and declare, “Sorry I just want to pet this dog”. I then pet the dog and leave without a word.

It appears no social or physical barriers will prevent me from touching a cute dog. Was I ashamed? Yes. Was I incredibly satisfied? Also, yes.

46E The Promenade, Sanctuary Cove P 07 5577 9712 info@blackangusbarandgrill.com.au I blackangusbarandgrill.com.au

Get over-attached to a soft toy Let’s be honest, petting stranger’s dogs is great and totally socially acceptable, but what about when you are stuck at home alone? Who are you going to harass then? Seeing as that bemused lady in the hairdressers didn’t offer to timeshare her poodle, there is really only one logical solution. Buy a giant pink soft toy seal. Who needs a boyfriend when you have an inanimate object to hold at night? Well, me. But that’s not the point. The point is, using a stuffed toy as an emotional crutch is a completely fine and normal way to deal with this situation. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

The point is, using a stuffed toy as an emotional crutch is a completely fine and normal way to deal with this situation.

Trust me, you won’t regret it.

Use your spare time In a long-distance relationship you inevitably find yourself with a fair bit of spare time. Of course, there are good and bad ways to use this time. Please learn from my mistakes, use this time to go out and explore the world, run free, young one. Don’t sit indoors, in the dark, purchasing non-prescription reading glasses online.

The worst part? I didn’t even buy them for fashion, I just wanted to know what style of frame would suit my face in case I needed reading glasses in the future. So now I am alone, poor, and surrounded by glasses I don’t need. Typical.

9

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February 2018

GET IT I SOCIAL

#OOTD

Outfits of the day spotted on the Gold Coast

Here are some of our favourite Gold Coast outfits of the day and night from Instagram. Worn by fashion lovers, stylists, bloggers, mums and more, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re obsessed with these looks!

FOLLO W INSTA US ON GRAM @get itmag

@rebeccadales @kiarabelladesigns

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Share your outfit of the day or night with us for the chance to be featured here by hashtagging #getitmaggc February 2018

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GET IT I GIVEAWAYS

giveaways For your chance to WIN head over to our Facebook page and on the pinned post tell us why you and your significant other need the Ultimate Valentine’s Day Giveaway.

• fashion • accessories Providing a premium shopping experience!

THE ULTIMATE VALENTINE’S DAY GIVEAWAY

ebruary is the month of love and this giveaway is sure to spark some romance in your relationship if it’s been lacking lately.

Firstly, you’ll pick up your brand-new car for the weekend from Grand Motors Toyota, 265 Ferry Road, Southport. Fresh, bold and different, Australia's favourite mid-size sedan, the All-New Camry, will defy expectation!

With a choice of three different engines within the range, you’re sure to find the perfect strength to match your driving style, and weekend plans!

Next, you will be glammed up by Amanda Higl. With your $235 hair and makeup voucher, you will be feeling beautiful, sexy and confident, ready for a romantic night out with your significant other.

Your refreshed look will take his breath away, we guarantee!

Lastly, the two of you will head to De Vito Waterfront Restaurant with a $150 dining voucher for an entertaining evening! The owners Tarscha and David De Vito, The Singing Chef and world renowned opera singer, wow audiences nightly with their live music. Serenading assured!

What you decide to do for the rest of the evening and weekend is up to you, but we hope this romance will have sparked some ‘adult’ romance. Happy Valentine’s Day ladies!

Adorne Banana Blue Chocolat Lula Soul Matisse Monari N.Y.D.J. Obi Olsen Ruby YaYa HSL Travellers Zaket & Plover OPENING HOURS Monday to Friday 9.30am to 5.00pm Saturday 9.00am to 3.00pm

The beautiful All-New Camry will be the winners for the weekend and is provided by Grand Motors Toyota.

Test drive today it today at 265 Ferry Road, Southport.

P (07) 5583 6888.

Sundays and public holidays closed.

13 Grice Avenue, Paradise Point mirraboutique.com.au Phone 5564 2676 11

February 2018

GET IT I FEATURE The Marine Village, Sanctuary Cove Hope Island Photography by Renee Bisley Styling by Susie McWatt Forbes Makeup by Rachael Scott Hair by Marcus Edwards

Chloe Maxwell gets real with Get it’s Kirstin Cuthbert on her marriage, son’s autism and the pressures of being a woman and mother

The ups, downs and

inside outs

February 2018

12

I was invited into Chloe Maxwell and Mat Rogers’ beautiful, open plan home in Clear Island Waters. Chloe has had an illustrious career on TV as a presenter and worked as a model too, famous as ‘The Jeans West Girl’. Her husband Mat is a former dual International (Union and League) ex Cronulla Sharks and Gold Coast Titans player. Mat has two children from a previous relationship and together they have Max (Maxi), aged 11, and Phoenix, aged 10, plus an extra-friendly staffy and talkative blue budgie.

When I arrive, Mat has gone to work as he is currently the Volunteer Engagement Manager for the 15,000 volunteers for the Commonwealth Games. Chloe takes a break from her busy day and we sit down on her couch to chat while her kids and two of their friends play in the next room.

Hi Chloe, thanks so much for speaking with me today! Let’s start off with how you and Mat met.

We met in 2005 on Australia Day at the races in Randwick. I was hosting there for The X Factor with Daniel MacPherson. He’s originally from Cronulla, and he knew Mat from living around that area. Channel 10 had a tent next door to the Waratahs tent, and that’s how I met Mat. Daniel introduced us. We took the mickey out of ourselves and each other; we had a similar sense of humour. I thought he was nice and funny. I moved to Melbourne that afternoon, so we spoke over the phone a few times and when I came back to Sydney we went out to dinner a few times. It was a very slow progression.

But it certainly progressed, didn’t it!? So kids and then marriage…

Yes, we did it the wrong way around! Phoenix was one when we got married in 2008. We’ve been married 10 years this year.

Congratulations! So, what has kept the spark alive?

We try and get away once a year — just the two of us — and spend time together, and we still do date nights.

For so long, so much time was taken up with my autistic son, Maxi, and getting him sorted and making sure he was alright. He was in early intervention therapy that was in Ashmore, so I’d spend four hours in the car every day, five days a week. We had to invest so much time to Max, and we needed to ensure we had that time for each other as well.

“You have to remember you’re a team and you’re on the same team.

Sometimes you forget, and you want to tackle the other person, but just remember you’re on the same team, you’re working together.”

We often hear that having an autistic child can put a strain on marriage, even leading to divorce, how did you and Mat get through it and was your marriage impacted at all?

It made me lose focus of my husband a little bit because I spent so much time obsessing over what I could do and what Maxi needed. But my husband was amazing, he understood everything we went through, and it brought us closer together because we went through so much.

In the beginning we relied so heavily on each other, as most of our family is in Sydney. So just having someone every day to bounce things off, to have a cry to, to have a meltdown to… to have someone say, “It’s okay, we’re going to get through this,” was pretty huge. He was actually an incredible support for me during that time.

13

February 2018

married and think ‘oh it’s just going to be rainbows and unicorns and we’re going to sail off into the sunset,’ but you actually have to work at it. Nowadays, the rates of divorce are so high because people just think, ‘too hard, I’ve had enough.’ And for me, that’s not an option. I said ‘til death do us part and that’s the way it stays.

We read a lot of books on relationships and we have invested a lot of time in personal development. There’s lots of great books I can recommend like The Five Love Languages and Love and Respect

by Emerson Eggerichs. Both of us have read these books. The more you can work on each other and understand what each other’s needs are, and what your role is in the relationship is, and as a parent, then you’ll be fine.

But there’s always going to be ups and downs, inside outs and whatever else! You have to remember you’re a team and you’re on the same team. Sometimes you forget, and you want to tackle the other person, but just remember you’re on the same team, you’re working together.

Let’s talk a bit about Max’s autism.

Can you tell me what it was like when he was born and when you noticed something was different?

When he was born was awesome. He

I know that the statistics show that it can go the other way, and it’s sad that can happen, but for us, we were lucky enough that it strengthened our bond.

Sounds like you two got through it with a lot of communication?

Yes, it was through a lot of communication — probably too much from my end! I like to be able to talk things through, but I was always all over the shop mentally. He’s one of those people that is very even keel, so he complements me quite well, and he’s very good at calming me down and telling me it’s all going to be fine.

I was a mental case a lot of the time — I am a mental case a lot of the time — let’s face it! But a lot of us women are, we go through ebbs and flows emotionally, especially as mothers, because so much is expected of us and we expect so much of ourselves. You’re constantly comparing yourself to others, which is very dangerous; I don’t think you can do that in these or any circumstances as a mum. You just do what you can, and if your kids are happy and you’ve got a roof over your head, then that’s the main thing really.

What do you do for date nights and what’s on the cards this Valentine’s Day? We’re big foodies so we like going to restaurants. We’ll just pick a nice restaurant and go and splurge on some nice wine and food.

Sometimes we’ll go and stay at a hotel nearby or something to just get away. For us, because we go out quite regularly, Valentine’s Day is just another day. We do give each other cards though. I want to go to the new Hellenika actually, because I haven’t been since they reopened, so that may be on the cards!

What’s your advice for other married couples?

You’re always working on your marriage. A lot of people get

February 2018

“As a woman, especially in a situation where you have an autistic child, to have a husband that believes you can sort it out, that we will sort it out together, and to have that confidence, is important.

He was my rock.” was my first. It wasn’t until he was just past one that my husband saw signs of him being different. Because Maxi was my first, I didn’t know what to expect milestone-wise. He liked stacking cans, he wouldn’t answer to his name — we thought he has hearing issues — and he would have really big meltdowns and be quite violent towards me because he couldn’t communicate. It was actually my dad that pointed out perhaps he might be autistic, and that was really tough for me because I didn’t want to hear there was anything wrong with my child.

As a mother, what was it like finding out he had autism?

At the time it was like my whole world came crashing down. I was really depressed. It’s hard because as a woman you take on a lot with your children, you expect to be the one that can guide them and help them, and when you’re faced with issues like that, you think ‘How am I going to do it? What am I doing?’ I felt like I wasn’t the right person for the job, I wanted to sub out. I needed a new mum to come in.

How have your feelings changed from then to now?

We’re in such a good place now; he’s the joy of my life. And to think how devastated I was back then… I couldn’t imagine him not being him now.

14

"The more you can work on each other and understand what each other’s needs are, and what your role is in the relationship is, and as a parent, then you’ll be fine."

Maxi spent three years in an early intervention program at Little Souls in Arundel, and now he’s in a mainstream school. He loves it, he loves school and he’s got lots of friends.

He’s done so many things that I would never have thought he was going to be able to do. I have a lot more hope for what he can achieve. Your expectations change a little, but instead of placing your own expectations on them, you look at what they enjoy doing and concentrate on what their strengths are, and that’s what we’ve done with Max. What’s the relationship between Phoenix, your daughter, and Max like?

Phoenix has actually been his little guardian angel the whole time he’s been at school. He’ll come to her classroom, and she’ll bring him out to the car; over the years if he has a meltdown, the teachers will come and see her, and she’ll calm him down. She’s had a very maternal role as a sister with him.

Next year, when Maxi goes to high school, it’ll be the first time he’s without her. It will be interesting to see how he goes but it’s good; he needs some independence. They’ll be at different schools in high school which will be good for her as well because she needs to be able to concentrate on her life. It’s a bit scary but we’ll see how we go!

And Max actually inspired you two to start a charity, can you tell me a bit about it?

The early intervention treatments really helped Max. It was $40,000-$50,000 a year, and we were lucky we could afford the treatment but a lot of people can’t. Statistics show that children can transfer pretty smoothly into mainstream school if they do those one-on-one treatments, but a lot of people don’t have the funding for that, so that’s why we started our charity 4 ASD Kids in 2009.

What have you achieved through the charity?

We have raised close to two million dollars and we have put kids into early intervention programs all around the country. We also fund other programs that help with ASD in terms of social interactions, and we buy iPads for kids.

At the moment we’re about to start filming a TV show that will

be screened on Channel 9 and National Geographic globally. It will raise more money, and more awareness, not only for 4 ASD Kids but for autism around the world. We’re taking four athletes over to Germany to compete in a triathlon, Challenge Roth — and I’m one of those athletes! God help me, I’m going to die!

It mirrors what we went through with Maxi — the fear, not knowing if you can get through it, that journey of ‘maybe I can do this,’ and then the adulation at the end of reaching that goal.

Will Mat be competing in it with you?

Mat won’t be doing it with me, I think if he does we will get a divorce! He did two Ironmans last year, he did Kokoda, he’s done ridiculous things — he needs a break. I’m surprised he’s still standing, it’s only tattoos holding him together!

He’s better support. He believes in me so much enough that I believe I can do these things. I guess as a woman, especially in a situation where you have an autistic child, to have a husband that believes you can sort it out, that we will sort it out together, and to have that confidence, is important. He was my rock, and he still is.

HOW YOU CAN GET INVOLVED Set up a fundraising page when you participate in an event: 4asdkids.gofundraise.com.au Buy tickets to events that fundraise for 4 ASD Kids: • The 2018 Bruce Lynton Charity Ball, held Saturday June 2 • 2018 Condev Charity Golf Day, held Friday March 16 Stay updated with them on social media for more announcements: • Facebook: facebook.com/4ASDKids • Instagram: instagram.com/4asdkidscharity 15

February 2018

GET IT I WORK LIFE PROFILE

WORK LIFE

lissfully in love and residing in Tweed Heads are Dancing With Her founders and fiancées Tara Baker and Arlia Hassell.

Together they have not only built a life but also the world's leading wedding resource for lesbian women. With same-sex marriage now legal and recognised in Australia, their company and the resources they provide have never been so important!

HOW WE CAME TO OWN OUR COMPANY… TARA: Three years ago my partner, Arlia, and I sat on a secluded island beach in Western Australia, we proposed our love, and proposed an elopement. Five hours later, Arlia was receiving life-saving brain surgery to fix a bleed that she had sustained when falling off a bicycle. She doesn't remember that day, or the conversations. The road to recovery has been tough, but one thing has been constant — our love and dedication.

In 2016, I proposed to Arlia and swept her away to Melbourne for a romantic night.

The next day, we headed out to source wedding material but were left uninspired.

Wedding media in Australia is largely heteronormative so we decided to do something about it.

ABOUT OUR COMPANY… Dancing With Her was an Instagram account where we collated out our own wedding inspiration. It didn't take long for our inbox to start being flooded with brides who wanted to share their same-sex weddings with us too. A website was launched, and a small digital magazine early 2017. We’ve seen an incredible response for women across the world. With that in mind, we released Volume One of our print magazine out into the world in November 2017.

Dancing With Her is a collection of wedding inspiration, real engagements, real weddings

Our community is one that has been unrepresented in the wedding industry for a long time. If we can connect them with relatable wedding inspiration that helps them to feel accepted and loved then we have done our job.

and a list of some of Australia’s very best wedding vendors who are LGBTQ+ inclusive.

We inspire a modern LGBTQ+ bride.

OUR RESPONSIBILITIES INCLUDE… Everything from sourcing content and designing to organising the chaos that is printing, distribution and marketing to taking care of all the behind-the-scenes paperwork. We’ve been really lucky to align with some amazing people who love what we’re doing and they’ve really helped bring everything to life.

HOW OUR TYPICAL DAY GOES… Tara is an early riser. Usually, she’ll process the orders from overnight, check out social media and respond to emails. From there, every day looks different. One day we might be sourcing content and writing editorials, other days we might be working on marketing campaigns, organising events and photo shoots or working on printing and distribution. Some days there’s a focus, other days it’s a little of this, a little of that.

Some days we take a sporadic day off and head down to the beach.

THE MOST REWARDING PART… Being able to inspire people. Our community is one that has been unrepresented in the wedding industry for a long time. If we

can connect them with relatable wedding inspiration that helps them to feel accepted and loved then we have done our job.

WHAT SURPRISES PEOPLE… People are usually surprised to hear that behind our brand is just two women in love.

We have an amazing network of people around the globe lending a helping hand but, for most part, it’s just us.

WHAT WE DO AFTER WORK… Ah, the blurred line between work and home life. We work from our home office, right next to our bedroom. We are both still learning when to switch off and have ‘after work’ time.

When we aren’t working, you might find us eating out around the coast, heading down to the beach or spending time with our family — we can’t guarantee we won’t be talking about ‘work’ though!

HOW WE FIND BALANCE… It is so challenging, Dancing With Her has become our lives. We are so passionate and committed to its message and our hopes and dreams for it. While from the outside our 14+ hour days might not seem like balance, we don’t feel unbalanced. So long as we are nurturing our relationships, with one another, our family and friends, and taking out enough ‘me’ time, we are okay about it all.

Plan B: If we find ourselves out of a job we will continue to follow our little entrepreneurial hearts.

February 2018

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Photography by Fox & Kin

A look into the lives of Tara Baker and Arlia Hassell, Founders of Dancing With Her

Does cheating really kill your marriage?

Christopher and Krystina from CK Family Lawyers are here to discuss it

nfidelity. Cheating. Adultery. An affair.

Whatever term you use, it’s a devastating event in a marriage or partnership.

DEFINITION: Infidelity is defined as sex outside a marriage or primary relationship, unless the relationship is expressly open in nature.

Yet emotional infidelity can be just as damaging to a marriage and, for many, the emotional aspect of an affair is more devastating than the physical. Most affairs incorporate both emotional and physical aspects.

How common is infidelity?

Statistically: l According to Sexual Health Australia, up to 70% of all marriages will experience an affair. l 60% of men polled admit to having an affair at some point in their marriage — yet most claim to be happy within their marriages. l 45% of women polled admit to having an affair at some point in their marriage, with fewer happy in their marriage than men who cheat. l Internet affairs are becoming more prevalent. l People are more likely to be unfaithful during a challenging period in their relationship. l A staggering 2-3% of children are the product of infidelity (Anderson, KG: Current Anthropology48). l Infidelity is becoming more common in people under the age of 30.

l The biggest deterrent for many people against having an affair is the possibility of being caught. l In many cases, infidelity goes undiscovered.

Why do people cheat?

The decision initially to be unfaithful is rarely rational, and most people who are unfaithful are driven by momentary emotions and circumstances — and are surprised by their behaviour at the time.

Men and women tend to be unfaithful for different reasons.

Men are often seeking out physical satisfaction outside the marriage (even when they are satisfied sexually in the marriage), whereas women tend to be looking for emotional benefits. (Men don’t seek emotional intimacy in an affair as a general rule).

Men who cheat tend to do so more and with more people, yet a woman is more likely to end a marriage as a result of her affair. Put simply, men see affairs as being simply sex-based, while women seek a significant emotional involvement from having an affair.

The main justifications for having an affair are: l Sexual: excitement, novelty, variety. l Emotional: enhancement to self-esteem as well as companionship. l Extrinsic: for career advancement or revenge on a partner.

THE HUSBAND Christopher has 20 years’ experience as a lawyer with 10 years specialising in family law matters. He has extensive knowledge dealing with matters relating to divorce, property settlement, children’s matters, financial agreements and domestic violence. By understanding what a difficult part of life his clients are going through, Christopher works alongside them to assist them in moving forward.

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l Love: affection and falling in love. Many people find a more suitable partner after they are already married.

Whatever the reason for an affair, the effect on a marriage can be devastating.

The partner of the cheater can experience hurt, pain, anger, betrayal, depression, and shame.

The unfaithful partner may feel invigorated, but will also feel guilt for hurting their spouse. The couple will often then experience erosion of trust, mood swings, intense arguments, sleep and eating disturbances, and anger and depression.

Does cheating mean divorce?

Interestingly, though the overall rate for divorce in Australia is close to 50 per cent, fewer than 20 per cent of divorces are due to infidelity. In fact, according to research, more than 30 per cent of marriages survive the discovery of an affair.

There is much that holds a successful marriage together, and other connections can be enough to save the relationship if both parties are willing and able to work through the betrayal. Some of these factors that can save a marriage include shared experiences, strong emotional bonds, children, belief in the future of the relationship, and commitment to each other.

To survive: l The unfaithful party needs to be actively willing to change. l The betrayed party needs to be willing to forgive. l Both partners need to be patient. l Both partners need to be willing to acknowledge and confront any issues that precipitated the affair.

With hard work, counselling and commitment, couples who are willing can find a new basis on which to rebuild their damaged relationship and avoid a divorce. If not, divorce is the likely outcome — and for many, this is the only way forward.

If you are separating, please talk to us about the process you need to take to get the best possible outcome for everyone involved.

Call us on 5530 8022, email at info@ckfamilylawyers.com.au or visit ckfamilylawyers.com.au

THE WIFE Krystina is the firm’s Client Relationship Manager. She has worked in legal offices for the last 13 years with her focus being around family law. Her knowledge of family law and business procedures ensures she is well equipped to handle all client’s needs and the continual growth of the firm as it moves forward.

February 2018

GET IT I FEATURE

Love doesn’t always end in happily ever afters, sometimes it ends when you find your husband in bed with another woman — we hear from that woman heating sucks. Especially when you’re the one who gets cheated on. There’s plenty of airtime for people who have been cheated on, especially when our girlfriend’s come crying to us as the result of an unfaithful partner, but it’s time we hear from the other side.

And by other side we don’t mean the unfaithful spouse, oh no, we mean the woman he cheated with. The homewrecker. The mistress.

The sidepiece. The other woman.

Studies say that affairs are most likely to occur two years into a marriage. 36% of the time it’s a co-worker and 17% of the time it’s a sister-in-law or brother-in-law — yikes. 10% of the time affairs begin online and 40% of the time online affairs turn into real-life affairs. Want to hear the worst stat? People who have cheated before are 350% more likely to cheat again. So ladies, the saying once a cheater, always a cheater, couldn’t be truer! Without further ado, let’s hear what some mistresses have to say.

THE ONLINE/REAL LIFE OTHER WOMAN This incident all began on Instagram and let me just premise this story by saying I never knew he was married until the very end (if that makes it any better). The man, Anton, came across me on Instagram and messaged me one day. He was full of friendly compliments, American, charming and fun to talk to. Better yet, he was moving to the Gold Coast soon to play for a local rugby union team.

We messaged back and

forth for weeks, almost daily, and then began video chatting frequently too. He introduced me to his friends when we would video chat and I had begun talking to my co-workers and friends about him. He even sent flowers to the office I worked in. After a few months we began planning for him to come out here, as he informed me that he needed to meet some people before he flew out to be on the team, and wanted to meet me too. He paid for his flights and a hotel.

I picked him up from Brisbane airport when he arrived. He was nice, but not what I expected. Shorter than he let on and at least 10 or 15kg heavier. But nevertheless we drove back to the Gold Coast, awkward conversation galore.

He was here for around two weeks and we had an alright time. He hardly wanted to get into bed with me which I thought was weird considering he didn’t have much time here, and when we did it was less that I imagined it would be. I still showed him around the Gold Coast, and it was an okay time, but I was already thinking of ending it once he left.

I dropped him to the airport and said goodbye then headed back home and opened my laptop. He had left his Facebook logged on to my computer, as he’d been using it, and that’s when I discovered he was married. Before he had flown to Australia I had looked at his social media and his Instagram, and neither had anything about a wife. His Facebook was private and he didn’t want to add me on there as he said he never used it. He had also never mentioned a wife, or ever being married, he told me he was single. So naturally, this was a HUGE shock.

His flight hadn’t departed yet so I called him, abusing him for not

They were all filled with rage that I had enticed her husband across the world to get into bed with me. I just hope that he copped his fair share of abuse once he got home too and was not just welcomed in with open arms to a nice homecooked meal.

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Then I found out he wasn’t living a separate life at all. I got to know his friends well and one of his mates sat me down and said, “It’s bullsh*t, he’ll never leave her, and when you go around there, it’s a normal family.”

telling me. He tried to convince me they were separated and don’t speak, and that he is single. But I scrolled through their Facebook conversation and looked at his pictures. They were very much married and ‘in love’; his Facebook was full of wedding pictures and images of them at church together… her last few messages to him were even asking him what he wanted as his welcome home meal after his business trip. There was nothing separate about them.

I then wrote in their Facebook conversation informing her that it was less business and more of a pleasure trip before logging out, slamming my laptop closed and swearing off men for good. He must have told her exactly who I was because, while he peacefully flew back home to his wife, messages and comments flooded in across all of my social media about what a ‘whore’ (and other derogatory terms) I was for sleeping with this woman’s husband. These were not only left by the woman herself but her friends and family. They were all filled with rage that I had enticed her husband across the world to get into bed with me. I just hope that he copped his fair share of abuse once he got home too and was not just welcomed in with open arms to a nice home-cooked meal.

Oh, and in case you’re wondering, when the new rugby union season begun, there was no Anton on the team.

Surprise, surprise.

THE FIVE YEAR LONG OTHER WOMAN Back in the day - when I smoked - I asked him for a light in a bar. He was with a group of friends and I just started talking to him. He was really nice and had no ring on, so I thought he was single. He lived in Brisbane, so he’d come down to the Gold Coast once a week and we would catch up. My son was one year old and I had been split up from my husband only nine months, so it all suited me. We even went on holidays together to Sydney, Hong Kong and New Zealand.

Six months had passed before I found out he was married. He had a house on the Coast which I didn’t know about. A friend of mine went past on a boat and saw him with kids and his arm wrapped around a woman on the deck. We met up for dinner later and I asked him and he said,“Yep, I’m married”.By then I was in love.

Then the ‘I’m going to leave her’ started, and that went on and on and on. It was when his young daughter started school he would leave, then when this other event happened etc. All his friends would say to me,“He will leave 19

for you, I’ve never seen him like this, he’ll definitely leave”.We got on so well, my parents knew him, and he was a big part of my life by this stage. Valentine’s Day would come around and he would take me out and say,“If she didn’t know, how could I be here? You see my marriage, it’s not a normal marriage, she knows, we live separate lives, in separate bedrooms, we stay together for the kids.”

Then I found out he wasn’t living a separate life at all. I got to know his friends well and one of his mates sat me down and said, “It’s bullsh*t, he’ll never leave her, and when you go around there, it’s a normal family.”There wasn’t anything separate at all. That was four years in.

Then I found out he had been spotted with someone else! I rang his best friend and asked him if he knew anything about this and he said,“What makes you think that if he’s unfaithful to his wife that he’s not going to be unfaithful to you?” It was in his nature. That kind of brought it all to a head.

In the end he’d try to buy me. He’d turn up with Tiffany jewellery, and it was like,“I don’t want jewellery, I want you to leave her”.He bought me diamond rings but I didn’t want that, it wasn’t making me happy.

His wife knew there were others, it all sort of came out over time, but I thought she didn’t know about me. There was a track record. I was with him the longest apparently, the others were about six months.

He was very suave, charismatic, extremely well dressed and funny. He knew what he was doing because he’d obviously been doing it a long time. When we’d gone to New Zealand or Hong Kong, he’d always get up early at about 5am and tell me he’s going for a walk; I then realised that’s when he was phoning the wife up. Of course, how could I be that stupid?

One Christmas he gave me a present, a silver Tiffany bracelet. He then told me he got his wife the same one in gold. And I remember thinking what the hell are you doing? I couldn’t believe he went into Tiffany and asked for one gold, one silver please. It put it into perspective.

You can’t choose who you love. And if I had of known straight away, I think I wouldn’t have got myself in the mess; it was only that it was six months and I was in love with him when I found out.

I wanted to believe the whole ‘separate lives’ part but when I found out it wasn’t the case, I realised deep down I did know because there were always things that didn’t add up.

It broke my heart in the end, I remember just sitting on the floor crying, I was a mess. My girlfriends told me this has got to stop. We didn’t speak for a couple of years but then we did, and now, believe it or not, we are still friends to this day!

We speak twice a year on birthdays and Christmas. And yes, he’s still with his wife, and probably still with other women now.

February 2018

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SIP IN STYLE Manhattan Spirit Glasses, metallic pattern, set of 4 for $62.95 at Vogelhaus

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February 2018

GET IT I BEAUTY STYLE

Massage Mondays

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Be

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B o s s H ay

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Make me blush rd

Being in the industry, I like to think I’m fairly immune to the cheap tactics employed by marketing departments to have you buy their products. That was, until a friend of mine suggested I try her favourite mascara, Better than Sex by Too Faced.

“Better than sex?!” I retorted,“Oh please, I will be the judge of that!” And just like that I handed over my credit card.

Well played, Too Faced. Well played.

So, did it live up to its name? Well, to an extent, it did. It is equipped with a long, hourglass shaped wand that delivered intense, dramatic and extremely satisfying results first go. So better than the awkward, clumsy foolery with your high school boyfriend in the back of his mum’s station wagon? Hell yes. But thankfully most of us have advanced from there so perhaps it would be more aptly named ‘Better Than Some Sex’.

So, in the spirit of embracing sexiness — rather than giggling about it like school children — I want to pay homage to some of my favourite NSFW-named cosmetics of all time — plus, you know, Valentine’s Day and all. Because let’s face it, there’s nothing sexier than tossing on a coat of ‘After Sex’ following a few generous applications of ‘O-Glow’ and a sweeping of ‘Deep Throat’?

On second thoughts, that doesn’t sound so sexy after all…

So let’s start with one of my favourites, NARS blush in ‘Orgasm’ and ‘Deep Throat’.

You’ll be hard-pressed to find a beauty enthusiast who doesn’t swear by the rosycheeked, flushed finish of these staples. And by that, I mean the iconic blush, not their namesakes…

Then we have the team at Essie, whose nail polish colour ‘After Sex’ is a deep, crimson red. Forget that subtle post-sex flush, this is all fifty shades of red hot romance!

Speaking of nail colours, OPI isn’t far behind with their Bond Girls Collection Nail Lacquer in Pussy Galore. I could be wrong, but something tells me this one isn’t a nod to the classic single middle-aged spinster, who owns many pet cats.

Or how about Smashbox’s O-Glow Cheek Color for that “I just had sex” glow? You know what that say, fake it til you make it…

I could keep going but by now I’m sure you’re blushing brightly and clutching at your pearls. So, what I will do instead is wish every single one of you beautiful ladies a very happy and sexy Valentine’s Day!

Ge

Hayley x February 2018

e’re not sure if you’re fully aware but being a Get it girl is hard work. There’s photo shoots, interviews, writing articles, and so much more! This month we (Kirstin and Hayley) were feeling like we’ve been working particularly hard and in need of a little relaxation.

On this particular Monday morning, when the boss (Leanne) was out at meetings, we decided to take things into our own hands and get a massage. Now before you think we would actually ditch work in the middle of the day, have no fear — we know better than that (just!) — we brought the massages to us, so it was still technically ‘work’! Here’s how we did it: Step 1: We downloaded Soothe App from the App store, the new on-demand massage service.

Step 2: We ordered ourselves a couple’s massage with two massage therapists, selected our time (60 minutes) and what we wanted (deep tissue massages for our tight,‘overworked’ muscles).

Step 3: We waited less than an hour and voila! Our massage therapists arrived — Samantha (Sam) and Silvana! They set up their tables on the deck, we hopped on, laid down and relaxed.

1 Ordering our Soothe massage

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2 Within an hour the massage therapists arrive

4

They set up their tables on the deck outside

Massage time!

Having a massage in our own (second) home was so comfortable and all our knots and niggles are now a thing of the past. The two therapists were so professional and friendly, and we can’t wait to use the App again — we can even order the same wonderful girls again! We were left feeling blissed out, relaxed and ready to get back to work (or have a nap… we were that calm!).

It was as easy as ordering an Uber when we’ve had a few too many drinks on a night out! The App offers many different types of massages and is the perfect gift this Valentine’s Day, or any day really. We all deserve a little pampering, right?

A huge thank you to Soothe App and the amazing Sam and Silvana, you made our Monday morning amazing. So, same time next Monday?

Download the Soothe App from your App Store now for your very own massage delivered to you. For $20 off your first massage enter the promo/gift code: GETIT. Enjoy! For more info visit soothe.com 22

GET IT I BEAUTY product usage and allow your skin to breath. Not to mention, they offer a high SPF and contain zinc which is a natural water-resistant property.

Get totally

Blush it up! Add some blush to your cheekbones in a pink/peach tone to add a little highlight and enhance the shape of your face. Opt for a light sweeping across the area to keep it effortless and natural.

this Valentine’s Day Okay, not totally nude as in naked, but Crystal Dawson, Creative Director of Glam Affair, is helping you update your look for February 14 and beyond ith Valentines Day just around the corner, you have a lot to think about, right? Selecting the perfect dress, and the right makeup, hair, nails… phew! I’m exhausted just thinking about it!

Whether you’re hanging out at the café with your boyfriend or having a late night candlelit dinner with the hubby, updating your makeup look to something that’s more natural and effortless will give you more time to spend on the exhilarating aspects of the day.

Here are a few makeup tips to give you a naturally flirtatious look on Valentine’s Day, or every day if you dare.

Prime, prime, prime! This step is often missed and since it only takes two seconds, I always wonder why? Primers can aid in colour correction if you have redness,

help diminish the appearance of large pores, and — best of all — it will make your foundation stick to your face all day.

So if your coffee date ends in a late night steamy session, you can be confident everything is still in place.

Looking a little tired? Opt for a creamy concealer which offers much better application. Pro tip: only use the concealer where you need it most and, unless absolutely necessary, do not apply to outer areas of the eye as this will ‘crack and crease’ from all the smiling you are sure to be doing, therefore making any fine lines appear deeper.

Gold Coast summers are HOT! Opt for a less-is-more approach with the foundation. The last thing you need is a melting face while deep in conversation with your beau. Try mineral foundations, these offer good coverage with minimal

Time poor? If you are like me, getting ready with kids hanging off you while you’re desperately waiting for Grandma to arrive is always a challenge.

Minimal fuss with your makeup routine will be the key. Try using your blush as your eye shadow colour or mix the blush with some clear gloss to get the most from your makeup kit, and keep your look monochromatic.

Desk to dinner look.

Going from desk to dinner can be a bit of a dilemma but a few things to consider are ensuring you have used a good primer to keep your foundation on all day. Wash off and reapply lipstick in a darker shade, add some depth to your eyes with a black liner and layer up on the mascara for a more flirtatious evening look.

If you’re blessed to be able to get out and about with your significant other this Valentine’s Day always remember, makeup is used to enhance a woman’s beauty, but nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief she is beautiful. Happy Valentine’s Day! Crystal Dawson is a mum, beauty educator and owner of Glam Affair, an Australian made and owned range of cruelty-free mineral cosmetics.

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February 2018

GET IT I FASHION BE MINE Harlow Boho Short Robe â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Pink, $79.00, homebodii

A BED OF ROSES Sofia Flutter Robe, $79.00, homebodii

Lost in Fashion and images by homebodii Shop the looks at homebodii.com February 2018

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TODAY, TOMORROW & FOREVER Sophie Monk wears the Tatiana Lace Bodysuit â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Ivory, $129.00, homebodii

lace love 25

February 2018

UNTIL THE END OF TIME Sophie Monk wears Kassiah Kimono Lace Robe, $149.00, homebodii

February 2018

YOU HAVE MY HEART Farrah Long Lace Chiffon Robe, $129.00, homebodii

To love oneself is the beginning of a

lifetime romance…

WHISPER SWEET NOTHINGS Sophie Monk wears Tatiana Lace Bodysuit – Ivory, $129.00, homebodii

Forever is a long time but I wouldn't mind spending it

by your side 27

GET IT I FASHION

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BRAS N THINGS Myla Brazilian Knicker - Black/Red, $29.99 / Myla Hope Push Up Bra - Black/ Red, $69.99 / brasnthings.com

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NYX PROFESSIONAL MAKEUP Butter Lipstick, Licorice, $10.50, hqhair.com

FSJ Red and Black Office Heels Pointed Toe Stilettos Pumps, $78.21, fsjshoes.com

Dominate

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COTTON ON BODY Satin And Lace Cup Bralette, $19.95, cottonon.com.au

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CHANEL Gabrielle, eau de parfum spray, 50mL, $174.00, myer.com.au

LULUS Valentina Nude Feather Ankle Strap Heels, $31.00, lulus.com

ANN SUMMERS Celia Longline Bra, $64.95 / Celia Thong, $29.95 / Celia Waspie, $54.95 / shop. davidjones.com.au

TEASE BY LOVEHONEY Black Blindfold, $24.95, lovehoney. com.au

LOVEHONEY Bondage Boutique Luxury Ostrich Feather Tickler, $18.95, lovehoney.com.au

Sexy Valentine's Day looks for the smaller chested Hello fashionistas!

February... the month of love!

Whether you have a lunch date or a nice dinner date planned, it’s important to dress so you feel sexy and confident. Let's start with what goes under your outfit, for that extra special surprise later!

There’s plenty of bras for our medium size and larger size ladies, so this month we’re focusing on our small busted girls.

Play dress up. Look for decadent fabrics, lace, seductive satin, embellishments and sexy mesh.

With a smaller bust you don't need a lot of support from your bra, so you have many options like wispy lace bralettes. Or if you want to create definition, underwire, padded or pushup bras are perfect. Opt for a wider band to make your top half appear bigger too.

Sexy frills, bows and ruffles will help draw the attention to your top half, and remember, less is more.

Lighter, feminine colours and pastels will create fullness, whereas black will slim and skim, so choose the colours that create the look you desire.

Pop a dress or sexy shirt over the top for a little flirty tease.

Enjoy the day, any excuse to bring sexy back, right? Even if it is just once a year!

Have a stylish and sexy month,

Susie

TONY BIANCO Ajana Black Harrow, $149.95, tonybianco.com.au

Style advice...

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Susie The Stylist

susiethestylist@gmail.com February 2018

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@susiethestylist

GET IT I RELATIONSHIPS

The wrong time It’s time to face an uncomfortable truth ladies, we never meet the right person at the wrong time, writes Get it’s Hayley Bogaard

e gather our girlfriends together; spilling our souls like we spill the cheap wine we pour into our glasses.“He’s perfect but it’s just not the right time,” we rationalise,“Maybe if it was in 12 months, or a few years. It’s just the timing, that’s all.”The girls nod into their own glasses of wine, silently united by a common experience of an ill-fated relationship that succumbed to bad timing.

One of them met the man of her dreams just a month before he moved back to England for a career opportunity. Another met her soul mate when he was in a relationship with someone else. One relationship ended because a partner wasn’t ready to get serious and another because they were getting serious too quickly.

So why do we surrender to the constraints of time, accepting it as an obstinate third party of our relationships? We are so willing to compromise the potential in defence of our time. We rationalise that he is the right guy; it’s just the wrong time.

But the truth is girls — and get ready because this one is going to sting — you never meet the right person at the wrong time. The people we meet at the wrong time are simply just the wrong people.

Stop for a moment and let that sink in.

Your failed relationship is not a cruel injustice, delivered by the hands of a ticking clock. It’s the culmination of every one of your decisions, however subconscious they may be. The point in which your intention and attention intersect and you meet your reality. This is not by chance, but rather by choice.

Truth be told, when we pass up someone

because the timing is wrong, we are really saying that we don’t want to give our time to that person. Maybe it stems from a fear of compromising our independence, taking a risk or changing our status quo. Maybe it’s just convenient for us to hide behind the veil of bad timing.

But if you’re really, deeply, honest with yourself, you will know that there will never be a perfect time… when the stars and planets align, and every piece of your complex puzzle falls neatly into place. But that’s the beauty of humanity. We will never fit perfectly, but maybe — just maybe — one day you’ll meet the right person who will fit you perfectly.

And that’s the thing about the right people.

They turn up unexpectedly and suddenly time, well, it slips away. It’s no longer relevant.

Because the right people take your plans and throw them out the window and, in their place, they give you the promise of new adventures, challenges and fulfilment.

The right people don’t impose limits and restrictions on your time. They aren’t an inconvenience. The way you feel when you’re with them supersedes your need for selffulfilment. You don’t how you know, but you just do.

We need to stop using time as an excuse, and stop accepting it as one. It’s okay to walk away from the wrong person. It’s okay to be the wrong person. It’s okay to have invested time and emotions in to the wrong person.

Even the wrong people have the right purpose in our lives.

It’s inevitable that we will meet many more wrong people than right people. But 29

But the truth is girls — and get ready because this one is going to sting — you never meet the right person at the wrong time. The people we meet at the wrong time are simply just the wrong people. cherish the wrong people too. They aren’t fundamentally bad, just wrong for you. The guy that delicately explains to you that he just needs some time to focus on himself is not out to hurt you. In fact, he is probably trying to save you from hurt. It’s the classic,‘it’s not you, it’s me’ line dressed up with the trappings of time.

But there is beauty to be found in all this tragedy. If you have met the wrong person, at the wrong time, then the right person is still out there for you to meet. And that, in itself, is exciting and exhilarating. The promise of what’s to come. When the timing — and the person — is just perfect.

So ladies, gather the girls, pour the cheap wine and remind each other that the right person will come along, at just the right time.

And that is something worth drinking to!

February 2018

GET IT I HEALTH

My

ovarian cancer journey

Hear how Gold Coaster Judith Lovatt is fighting late stage ovarian cancer found out I had ovarian cancer purely by accident. I had an awful fall down some steps and I wet myself. It got worse each day and I couldn't even laugh too hard.

Eight weeks after I saw my doctor and then a gynaecologist; they were more concerned with my kidneys or thought it was to do with my extremely rare autoimmune condition called PERM. I have plasma exchange for it every three weeks which is gruelling at times and a day after my exchange I woke up with an awful tummy pain and a temperature.

I asked my friend Deb to drop me off at the local hospital. When I saw the doctor he felt my tummy, said it could be a blockage, and I was sent for a CAT scan. Lying there in emergency on my own the doctor told me, “Judith I have some really bad news… We have found a huge mass we believe to be growing from your right ovary. Its spread into your pelvis.”

Where I had my hysterectomy 17 years ago was a huge mass. I called Deb and my mum, they came to the hospital and were shown the scan and cried. I called my new partner, Steve, who I had only been seeing about seven weeks, and I said to Steve, “I think I have cancer, if you want to end the relationship that’s okay.” He was in shock and said, “No way, I’m here for you.”

I was admitted to the Gold Coast Hospital a few days later, my tummy was so swollen, I looked like a seven-month pregnant woman and was completely incontinent. It was confirmed I had Stage 3 IIIC; I was in the late stages of ovarian cancer. It was also on my bowel, fallopian tubes and had spread into my pelvis. I would be having aggressive chemo first before they could operate. It all became real.

Chemo was three hours of two types of chemo, every week. When the first canula went in I thought right, now I really fight.

My son, a hairdresser, shaved my head when my hair began to fall out and my family all came to his salon. It didn't scare me, we made it

February 2018

My son shaving my head with family around

fun for the grandkids with wigs, but my eldest granddaughter was so upset and couldn't watch. My son said it was one of the hardest haircuts he ever had to do. There are so many things you can do without hair; I made turbans from scarves to match each outfit and I wear two wigs occasionally. It’s just part and parcel of your cancer; you can either dwell on losing it or embrace it.

Steve and I Chemo wasn’t as bad as I thought; I felt sickly towards the end, but ginger was my rescue remedy tea, and biscuits, and fresh air. I still walked my dog Missy. The huge amount of steroids you're on make it impossible to sleep, I found that the worst.

After nine weeks of chemo, on December 18, my cancer had shrunk in half and it was time to operate. I woke up in ICU hooked up to so many drips and machines; it was my birthday too, happy Smiling wit birthday Jude, I thought — I had the best h Missy present, my mass was out.

I was discharged on the 23rd, so I had Christmas with my family. When I saw the cut on my tummy, it looked like someone had slaughtered me. It was shocking; the pain was bad. I realised I had, ay Teal Ribbon D and still have, a ay sd long recovery. is held Wedne alians tr us A d I’m now three 28 February an hase rc pu to weeks post-op are encouraged raise to on With my wig bb and have three Ri d wear a Teal an ; er more months arian canc awareness of ov of chemo ort for the pp su show your which will start eir families, women, and th next week. ith the who are living w I've had remember disease; and to great support those who have throughout my died. journey, and support means a lot during cancer.

From Steve to my family here The cut after th and my family who came over from the e operation UK; even my beautiful, faithful furry friend Missy — I rescued her and she has rescued me too.

I do wake up anxious now and again but I've faced every challenge and I believe that's all you can do when fighting for your life. The more I smile and laugh, the more I reckon I scare cancer off.

You can follow Judith’s journey on Instagram: @judeandmissy 30

Three weeks post

-op

deadliest

The of all the gynaecological cancers Know the symptoms, risk factors and preventative measures of ovarian cancer with Associate Professor Marcelo Nascimento, a Gold Coast Gynaecological Oncologist here is a lot of talk about the more incident cancers — like breast, prostate, melanoma, bowel, and lung cancers — but minimal discussion about ovarian cancer, which is the deadliest of all the gynaecological malignancies.

It is estimated that 1600 women will be diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2018, representing 2.7% of all female cancers.

While generally considered a disease of older women, with 60% of cases diagnosed in women over 60, younger women are also affected.The mortality rates have been declining, but the total numbers of new cases and deaths is increasing, largely because of our increasingly aging population.

WHAT IS OVARIAN CANCER? Ovarian cancer is not one disease but a wide array of microscopically and biologically distinct malignancies.The term refers to cancers arising from the epithelium or skin covering the outside of the ovary, developing from precancerous cells deposited from the adjacent fallopian tube.

The natural history of this disease is quite short, with progression to advanced stage within a short period of time. It is uncommon to have ovarian cancer diagnosed in an early

stage (Stage I), as most present with disseminated or Stage III disease.

SYMPTOMS Patients with one of more of the following symptoms on most days within a three-week period should have a discussion with their doctor: vague gastrointestinal upset, persistent abdominal bloating, difficulty eating and feeling full quickly, urinary urgency and frequency, constipation and pelvic pain.

RISK FACTORS AND FAMILIAL PREDISPOSITION The greatest risk of developing ovarian cancer is having a genetic predisposition such having the breast cancer gene (BRCA1 and BRCA2) gene. Most ovarian cancers are sporadic, arising in women without a hereditary predisposition.

Other factors that may increase the risk include increasing age, history of infertility, early onset of menstrual periods and late menopause.

Factors that may decrease a woman’s risk include oral contraception, pregnancy, breast feeding and tubal ligation.

SCREENING: UNFORTUNATELY, NO ROLE Scientific evidence has demonstrated that we have no reliable screening for ovarian cancer.

The key point here is try to identify patients at

risk who should be offered preventive measures.

Many women mistakenly believe the cervical screening test (HPV and liquid cytology, former Pap smear test) will detect ovarian cancer.

TREATMENT OVERVIEW The cornerstone of treatment for suspected ovarian cancer is surgery. For early ovarian cancer, some women do not require additional or adjuvant treatments. For the vast majority of patients with ovarian cancer, surgery is the standard where the goal is to remove all visible disease. After surgery, additional or adjuvant chemotherapy is usually delivered.

Scientific evidence strongly supports a superior outcome for patients whose surgery is performed by a Certified Gynaecological Oncologist and whose ongoing management is supervised by a Multi-Disciplinary Team (MDT).

PREVENTION Studies have demonstrated that oral contraceptive pills can reduce the risk by up to 55%. Key hole surgery to remove ovaries and fallopian tubes can reduce risk by up to 90-95%.

Maintaining a normal body weight has been also shown to be very important.

Remember these symptoms and discuss ovarian cancer with your friends and family too, you just may save a life.

Photo by Ana Thatcher

First Gold Coast-based gynaecological oncologist dedicated to prevention, diagnosis, and treatment of all types and stages of gynaecological cancer.

Dr Marcelo Nascimento Gynaecological Oncologist Laparoscopic Gynaecologic Surgeon P: 5564 5110 E: reception@drnascimento.com.au W: DrNascimento.com.au

31

DR MARCELO NASCIMENTO MD MSc FRANZCOG CGO A/Professor Griffith University

GYNAECOLOGICAL ONCOLOGIST LAPAROSCOPIC GYNAECOLOGIC SURGEON

Pindara Specialist Suites Suite 504, 29 Carrara Street, Benowa

February 2018

GET IT I DATING

I’m picking up

good vibrations

If Get it had a sealed section, this would be it. We’re pulling open the nightstand drawer and diving into the pleasurable and naughty world of adult sex toys with our very own under-the-covers sexpert

aise your hand if you’re as addicted to Netflix’s Grace and Frankie, starring Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin, as I am? Those of you without your hand currently waving frantically in the air, put down this article, cancel all plans for the next week and turn it on. Trust me.

You’ll soon learn that 79-year-old Jane Fonda is doing for vibrators what 44-year-old Jane Fonda did for workout videos: mainstreaming them.

These days, sex toys are a big deal — and no, I’m not talking about their dimensions. Around the world, the sex toy industry is booming in sales, innovation and popularity, none more so than right here in Queensland. In fact, a recent survey found that in 2016, Brisbane had a higher sex toy purchase per capita rate than any other city in Australia. What a time to be a Brisbanian!

So, as any good hard-hitting journalist does, I decided to go under the covers, yank open the bottom drawer of the nightstand and discover what all the buzz is really about!

ALL THE SINGLE LADIES, ALL THE SINGLE LADIES… They say that diamonds are a girl’s best friend but ask any single girl with a vibrator in her bottom drawer and she’ll know better. In today’s sexually liberal age, it’s hard to find a woman who doesn’t indulge in a little battery-operated pleasure. And why shouldn’t we?

Unbridled, explosive orgasms on demand with a companion who never has difficulty finding the clitoris…

Sex toys are the new Tupperware. In fact, even the humble Tupperware party and been replaced with ‘Passion Parties’, where we discuss and test vibrators, dildos, feathery clit ticklers and the like. It’s become commonplace for girlfriends to swap coffee dates for sex toy shopping, talk about masturbation amongst each other, and even keep a secret vibrator stash in the not-so-secret nightstand drawer.

But it’s not just vibrators and the traditional phallic-shaped rubber monstrosities that single girls are revelling in. In perhaps one February 2018

of the most prolific feminist movements of our time (okay, maybe I’m stretching a bit there…) the sex toy industry has sat up and actually listened to what women want. And what they’ve given us are discreet, beautifully crafted accessories to compliment every one of our pleasures. Vibrators that look like lipsticks for a discreet travel companion, massagers because we sure as hell aren’t getting that from men and last — but by no means least — clitoral stimulation. Yes, you read that right: they’ve finally found the clitoris — hallelujah!

Get stimulated: Ladies, whether you’re a sex toy novice, or already have a few tools in your arsenal, your new best friend is the Satisfyer Pro 2 Clitoral Stimulator, available at naughtygirl.net.au for $74.95. Contactless clitoral stimulation with a waterproof design so you can run yourself a bubble bath, pour a glass of champers and really treat yourself. And the best part? No need to return the favour…

A COUPLE’S AFFAIR With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, many couples will start to ponder how they can spice up the relationship. Perhaps the romance has faded, or your sex life has dwindled from it’s former glory. Well ladies, I have the answer: it may be time to open your bedroom to a little ménage et toi.

Hold on, before you recoil in horror at the thought of inviting a third person into your bedroom for perverted debauchery, I’m not talking about a person. I’m talking about a toy. Yes, that’s right. A couple’s sex toy.

In fact, many psychologists suggest that introducing adult toys into a relationship will not only benefit your sex life, but also the relationship itself. It encourages communication, trust and excitement between partners and can have ongoing positive impacts, well beyond the confines of your bedroom.

Introducing a toy to your relationship should never be about 32

MAN SPEAK

replacing your partner, but rather enhancing the experience for both of you. If you’re a little intimidated, start small. A blindfold, a pair of handcuffs, a tickler. Remember, you don’t have to be a leather-clad, whip-cracking dominatrix to introduce toys to your relationship (although if you are, I salute you!). All you need is an adventurous spirit, open communication and maybe a little Dutch courage!

Vibe together: If you’re ready to add a whole lot of spice to the bedroom, get your hands on one of the most popular couple's toys on the market, the Sync Couples Vibrator by We-Vibe, available at naughtygirl.net.au for $199.95.

This couples vibrator is designed to be enjoyed during sex, giving her powerful stimulation to her clitoris and G-spot, and together, you both share the vibe. You can even connect it to your phone via the app to control Sync from anywhere!

Long distance orgasms anyone?

with Ash Palmero from Rebel FM 99.4

Why do girls feel they are not loved or appreciated by their partners?

Father, husband and all round top bloke Ash Palmero weighs in...

Boys and their toys

n the never-ending battle between the sexes, men still generally have the upper hand. They get paid more, have arguably more rights and don’t have to endure childbirth.

However, one area in which women do come first (pun intended) is in the world of sex toys. For women, adult toys represent liberation and empowerment; for men, a shameful stigma still exists that portrays an image of a perverted loner, silently humping a fake vagina in the corner of a dirty basement while watching furry porn.

So how do we change the stigma? Ladies, meet Hugo.

Hugo, a remote-controlled prostate massager, is the sexy, black sports car of male sex toys. Sleek, seductive and sensual, he represents an entirely new way to think about men’s pleasure. Prostate stimulation offers a range of benefits including reducing the risk of prostate cancer, minimising painful ejaculations and — most intriguingly — increasing the intensity of male orgasms by 33%.

With such big claims, I decided Hugo must be put to the test, in the name of science, of course.

However, being an all-girl office, I had to recruit a member of the male species to assist in my experiment. One man — if somewhat reluctantly — eventually agreed. (Side note: to my brave, heroic guinea pig, you’re the real MVP!).

So what did we learn?

Firstly, preparation is key. A relaxed mood, a water-based lubricant and an excessive number of Gin and Tonics should do the trick.

Secondly, it’s a lot of fun. Don’t be afraid to have a laugh.

It lightens the mood and relieves the tension, which is a big bonus given the task at hand.

I’ll save you the graphic details, but I will say this: Hugo doesn’t disappoint.

His final verdict?

“It was fun. I didn’t dislike it. The elusive P-spot lives to be slain another day.”

So I guess that means we’re up for round two? Watch this space ladies…

Buy your man his very own Hugo and tell us how you go if you dare! The LELO Hugo Prostate Massager is available at naughtyboy.com.au for $332.95.

s blokes, we try to show you we love you, we even try and find ways of showing you… but for the most part, we always hear that we’re doing it wrong.

If your man doesn't notice that you have put a hair straightener through your hair, changed the colour of your hair, or that your nails have been freshly shellacked or have cute pictures or bling on them, this has no bearing on how much he thinks of you. It in no way relates to how much he loves you.

If your man is not noticing that you have done something different, it simply means that no matter what you do, he has looked past your exterior and is attracted to your mind, maybe your cooking, maybe the way you keep house or look after him, or in the way you love him for just being him.

In fact, if hasn't noticed these things, then good, it means that he is into you. Yes, he's into you, rather than the obvious exterior. The reason he has stopped noticing the unimportant exterior is because he has gotten more comfortable with the real you.

Sometimes when women dress up with a new outfit, new hairstyle, nails etc, it’s not for him but for themselves. Sometimes it’s so they may be noticed, not by their man, but by others. Interesting when you look at it that way, isn’t it? But if us guys mentioned that we would surely asking for trouble, right?

I mean, if a total stranger gives you the up and down glance when you’re out to dinner or walking down the street with your partner, that does not make you feel special. You've been noticed, that’s all. The fact that your partner did not pick up on something new going simply shows he has moved far past the first glance up and down, he is there with the real you.

When you turn and say, “You didn’t even notice…” think about what your partner is noticing — you telling him that he is wrong.

That’s he’s wrong for being into you. Think about how that will play out in the long run.

Let's stop looking or fishing for compliments on the exterior things; let’s get back to the important things and that is how you are making him feel.

33

February 2018

Your

opportunity Get your business in front of thousands of visitors and locals this April

Geditoiolnd

The

een, The gro the g ld een! betw and everything in

MUST-TRY spots on the Gold Coast

DINE, SHEOAPT AND

The experienced and passionate team behind Get it Magazine is proud to announce their most exciting issue to date, the April 2018 Get it Magazine Gold Edition. The tailored A5 format will be a handy pocket guide that points visitors to Gold Coast businesses. It will be your opportunity to be seen by the thousands of visitors here in April. With 20,000 copies to be distributed in key locations across the Gold Coast in April, The Gold Edition is for businesses that want serious exposure.

on the Gold Coast Z I N E M A G A

Dedicated profiles on Fashion • Events • Dining • Activities • Shopping • Nightlife • Day Spas • For the men • For the kids 34

February 2018

How can your business take the stage?

All destination images courtesy of Tourism and Events Queensland

INFORMATION: A complete guide of where to shop, dine, relax and have fun in our beautiful city. These exclusive sponsored placements will appear as native content and act as a handy pocket reference. They will be sectioned into three areas; South Gold Coast; Central Gold Coast; and North Gold Coast.

PAMPER & RELAXATION: Where to relax and indulge in some ‘me time’ among the busyness of the Games. There are limited native placements available for day spas, massage salons, hairdressers, nail technicians and more to show off their special services.

FASHION: Signature Gold Coast styles that match the fabulous lifestyle. A very exclusive opportunity to showcase clothing, footwear and accessories for the fashion forward.

Plus… Inspiring athlete profiles | Local feature stories | A guide to Gold Coast nightlife | Why visitors should return to the GC | Green and gold activities and must-see locations

Interested? For more information, contact Leanne Hart 35 leanne@getit-magazine.com.au | 0414 946 361

February 2018

GET IT I BUSINESS

sisterhood A

of success

We all know being around likeminded and inspiring women helps us to achieve our goals, but where can we find them — and how can they help us with our small business goals? as your New Year’s resolution something to do with your small business? Perhaps you want to expand and grow your business this year? Turn your side gig into your main gig and quit your corporate job? Or even launch the business idea you are so passionate about but have been procrastinating because you have doubts?

Well sista, it’s now February and if all you have done is jot down some intentional goals and not taken any steps to achieve them, we’re here to help.

A lot of the time owning a small business can be lonely, isolating and overwhelming.

Much of the time it’s just you working any hours of the day and night to figure things out, find new clients, make sales and develop some kind of business and social media plan because you read you should have one online.

You might work on your small business after your 9-5, when the kids are asleep or super early morning but it feels like it’s just you sitting there, with your computer, grinding away. There’s a million things to do and, until you expand, there’s just one you to do it. It’s tough, but even though it seems like you’re all February 2018

alone, you’re not.

While you may feel like the only person up at 4am or awake until 1am working on your business, chances are there are women around you, perhaps even in your neighbourhood, in the exact same position. You’re not doing it alone, we’re all in this together ladies!

Women are more business-minded and entrepreneurial than ever and so many of us have a small business or ideas for a small business. We know having a supportive friendship circle is great and a wise mentor can be the best thing, but a newer concept in the business realm is being a part of a tribe. A group of people there to support, inspire and motivate you.

Having a tribe, whether in person or online, will help you through your struggles like setting up websites; they will feel your pain when Facebook changes the algorithm and suddenly no one sees your posts anymore; and help you to choose the best outcome when you have a tricky client who is threatening to leave a bad review. These problems don’t only happen to you, they happen and have happened to all small business owners. And there are women out there who are willing to help you. And we’re sure you will have something to help them with too!

So rather than feeling isolated, find your tribe and then reach our when you need support, advice or some kind words. When women empower women they become a force to be reckoned with!

36

Group members Amanda Williams, Asha Peck (creator) and Sherry Cottam

Gold Coast Girls in Business One amazing way to be part of a supportive tribe is to join the Gold Coast Girls in Business (GCGIB) Facebook group. This group was started

by The Social Circle Founder/Owner Asha Peck.

“The purpose of the group is to provide female business owners and aspiring female business owners a safe and supportive place to get help, gain knowledge, make connections and ultimately grow their businesses into what they had dreamed of,” Asha says.

The group has only been around two months but in this time there has been businesses collaborations, the gaining of new clients, partnerships, regular meet ups and even some girls who weren't confident enough, or didn't think they had what it takes to open a business, have now taken those first steps to launching.

Lifelong friendships have been formed!

Any women who own or are thinking of owning a business can join the group. Just search for Gold Coast Girls in Business on Facebook.

Top ways to find your tribe l Join and be active in Facebook groups such as Gold Coast Girls in Business (above) l Attend regular small business meetups like the League Of Extraordinary Women l Participate in small in-person courses and stay in touch with other attendees l Reach out to local women you find inspiring and ask them to coffee l Attend local charity and community events and talk to other women, they probably have many similarities to you So go on, find your tribe and truly get started on your small business goals for 2018!

q q

I AM not sure about this

going to do it anyway

ZERO G JOININ FEE RY

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Fernwood Fitness Gold Coast, Robina Town Centre (upstairs, Target end of centre) P 5593 0938 www.fernwoodfitness.com.au FernwoodFitnessRobina

The Surrounds Summer Social brings the ‘New Helensvale’ to life elensvale will come to life on Saturday 10 February, with The Surrounds Summer Social — a vibrant community event treating Northern Gold Coast residents and visitors to a night of food, fun and fireworks.

Villawood Properties has partnered with Nightquarter to deliver the pop up carnival with free entertainment for the whole family at its brand new $500 million Helensvale community, The Surrounds.

This one-off event will showcase some of Nightquarter’s favourite vendors, with a range of popular Gold Coast food trucks dishing up sweet and savoury delights. Patrons can combine their love of food, music and entertainment, in a relaxed peaceful village atmosphere surrounded by green open space.

There will also be a host of freebies for the kids — big and small — including face painters, balloon artists, and circus performers.

Craft beers and local wines available. Parking available onsite. Free shuttle bus running between the Helensvale station and the festival.

When: Saturday 10 February, 5.00pm – 8.00pm Where: Country Club Drive, Helensvale More information: facebook.com/ TheSurroundsHelensvale About The Surrounds: thesurrounds.com.au

Summer evening festivities are coming to The Surrounds, Helensvale FOR THE ADULTS Live music, Food trucks, Bar, Summer Punch, Fireworks display

37

FOR THE KIDS Jumping castle, Dance party, Delicious treats, Face Painting, Roaming entertainment & much more The Surrounds, Counrty Club Drive, Helensvale Take the G:link to Helensvale Station designerdisplay.com.au February 2018

GET IT I TRAVEL

Schoolies with a difference choolies, it’s something all us Gold Coasters dread. Even if we don’t have children attending, we know those few weeks are all about drugs, alcohol and bad decisions, not to mention some ambulance trips and run ins with the law for the young adults.

However, when it’s our own children attending the Schoolies programs, here or elsewhere like Bali, it can be a very stressful and worrying time, but it doesn’t have to be.

In recent years, Schoolies has been about getting wasted and running wild. The true purpose has been forgotten which is to mark the end of schooling and celebrate a bright future to look forward to.

New programs have come about which do these things exactly, and they are incredibly affordable.

One great one is the 12 day/11 night Schoolies Volunteer Holiday in Vietnam with Wide Eyed Tours.

Your child will build projects for an ethnic minority community in the mountains and cook, feed and entertain a group of disabled and abandoned children in Central

Vietnam. They will visit Hanoi, Mai Chau, Hue and Hoi An. Seeing the world while gaining great life experiences, world perspective and brownie points on their resumes or university applications? Now that’s a way to finish off Year 12!

The fully-escorted adventure will also see the Schoolies, after 8 days of volunteering, retreat to a resort in Hoi An for a well earned rest before Your child will returning home. build projects for There is even the an ethnic minority option for family community in the to join the trip mountains and cook, too if you would like a fun family feed and entertain a holiday where group of disabled you can all enjoy and abandoned the beach and children in Central charming town of Hoi An with Vietnam. their Schoolies.

Call helloworld Hope Island now on 07 5530 8633 to book your young adult’s spot on a truly remarkable and rewarding Schoolies adventure.

SCHOOLIES 2018 VOLUNTEER

VIETNAM PROGRAM

Schoolies Retreat Volunteer Projects HAPPY VALENTINES DAY • Build projects for an ethnic minority community in the mountains • Cook, feed and entertain a group of disabled and abandoned children in Central Vietnam.

After 8 days of volunteering and touring the Schoolies will then retreat to a resort in Hoi An for a well earned rest before returning home.

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February 2018

38

The KEY to any exercise program is consistency. Even if you only do 30 mins once or twice a week, if you keep that up for a year, the results will SURPRISE you!

Fall in love with exercise!

Learn how exercise doesn’t have to be something you hate with Jeff Osborne from Vision Personal Training love this time of year! It’s sunny, hot, beautiful and the positivity swirling around is inspiring! The really cool thing is that there are so many people who have started an exercise program with great intentions to make this the healthiest year yet! But unfortunately, by now, the doubts start creeping in…

Life is busy, and unfortunately, the first thing that gets dropped when people get busy is their exercise. It shouldn't be like that, but it is. Then, before you know it, months have passed, and you are officially off the horse! So here are a few tips to stay on that horse and make exercise something you look forward to, and do, for the rest of your life!

Start at the beginning Too many people think that if they aren’t training like a professional athlete then it isn't worth doing! The key to any exercise program is consistency. Even if you only do 30 mins once or twice a week, if you keep that up for a year, the results will surprise you! And the best part is, when you start feeling great, that 30 mins twice a week turns into three times, then four and so on.

Don't over commit at the beginning, if this week you can only do 10 mins a few times, that is 100% better than doing nothing!

Be effective with your time Make the most of the time you have. If you have 9 hours a week to exercise, you can afford to do a ton of different stuff that isn't that effective. So many people say, "Do exercise you enjoy", and I disagree. For most people, just doing something they enjoy isn't enough if you don't see results. Do something you don't hate but make sure you do what works! Effective strength training, a good mix of high and low/moderate cardio and getting your eating right will see some amazing changes.

Set goals and milestones, but keep your eye on the big picture How long do you plan to be healthy for? I hope the answer is the rest of your life! That means you are going to be doing this for a long time yet. So, treat it that way. You don't have to kill yourself every session, you just have to turn up, and keep it up! Set some small goals that will give you something to work towards (walking a certain distance, tummy measurement, cycling… etc.) but remember, you have 30, 40, 50, 60+ more years of this! Pace yourself and be consistent.

Find a place that is social as well as effective One of the best ways to fall in love with exercise is to make it social. Go somewhere that you can have a chat, make some friends, develop relationships and enjoy the time. You know things are going well when you are meeting up with your exercise buddies for breakfast and a coffee every week, on top of the exercise sessions. If you are into pumping iron, don't go to a pretty gym… go to a hardcore, iron-pumping gym! If you are a busy professional, go to where other busy professionals go and get results.

Read up on healthy eating and exercise Find some blogs, Facebook pages (facebook.com/VisionBundall), Instagram accounts… anything that will keep being active and eating well in the forefront of your mind. When you are surrounded by it, you are more likely to stick to it.

Loving exercise and eating well is all about loving yourself, and doing something every day for you! Too many people sacrifice their health for so many other things, but if you make it a habit, and be consistent, you can enjoy life and be the healthy person you deserve to be.

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February 2018

GET IT I RECIPES

Foodporn Recipes that bring together our favourite preoccupations just in time for Valentine’s Day, food and sex A search for the #FoodPorn hashtag on Instagram returns upwards of 150 million images of all kinds of glorious, scrumptious food. It’s used to tag food that is portrayed in a very appetising or aesthetically appealing way. Meet the Aussie fire fighter who wanted to take the ‘food porn’ notion one step further… this butt-naked guy right here, Beau Cook.

Beau first caught the public’s attention as a contestant on Masterchef Australia.

Stir, mix, blend, cut, slice, peel, mash, smash (only avocado), bake, roast, grill, fry, boil, steam, barbecue you name it, Beau has done it with the best. Never one to make too much of a fuss about himself, Beau ignored the possibility of fame and fortune and is now a full-time professional fire fighter. He is at heart a team player, best working with and cooking for mates.

Beau’s inner teenager loved what Food Porn could be. Being sexually suggestive with food is fun so Beau went about developing a recipe book that took a light-hearted look at food and porn in a humorous and tongue-in-cheek way, or is that tongue in grapefruit?

Enjoy the licks and laughs as you make these recipes for a special lover or friend this Valentine’s Day!

Beau Cook’s Food Porn is available through most online book retailers including; Barnes & Noble, Book Depository & Amazon; or via his website: beaucooksfoodporn.com.

The cheeky book retails for $34.99.

February 2018

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STICK IT TO ME CHICKEN SATAY SKEWERS WITH CUCUMBER SALAD SERVES 4 INGREDIENTS

• 6 free-range chicken thigh fillets, cut into bite-size chunks • 1 tsp ground turmeric • 2 tbs peanut oil • 1 cup roasted, unsalted peanuts • 1 cup coconut milk • ½ lime, juiced • 2 tbs soy sauce • 1 tbs palm sugar • Fried shallots, to garnish Paste • 2 long red chilies (use 1 for less heat) • ½ red onion, roughly chopped • 2cm cube ginger • 1cm cube galangal • 1cm cube fresh turmeric • 2 garlic cloves, roughly chopped

• 2 coriander roots, roughly chopped • ½ lime, zested • 4 tbs peanut oil Salad • 2 small Lebanese cucumbers, roughly chopped • 1 carrot, thinly sliced • Handful fresh mint leaves • Handful fresh coriander leaves • 1 tbs lime juice • ½ tbs palm sugar • 1 tbs of water • 1 tsp sambal oelek

DIRECTIONS

HOT CHOCOLATE VEGAN PEANUT BUTTER HOT CHOCOLATE SERVES 2 INGREDIENTS • 200mL coconut milk • 100g dark chocolate (50-70% cocoa solids), chopped • 2 tbs choc-hazelnut spread • Salted peanut chocolate • 60g dark chocolate (50-70% cocoa solids), chopped • ¼ cup roasted, salted peanuts DIRECTIONS To make salted peanut chocolate, place chocolate in a microwave-safe bowl and heat for 50 seconds. Remove from microwave and stir until all pieces of chocolate have melted. Add peanuts and stir to combine. (You could also stir in some sultanas for a fruit-and-nut combo). Transfer peanut mixture to a small airtight container and place in fridge for 20 minutes or until set. Once set, store at room temperature until ready to serve.

To make hot chocolate, place coconut milk in a small saucepan over low heat and bring to a gentle simmer. Add chocolate and choc-hazelnut spread, and stir until combined and chocolate has melted. Pour into glasses and serve with salted peanut chocolate on the side.

Place chicken into a bowl. Add turmeric, 1 tbs of soy sauce and peanut oil, toss to coat, then cover and place in fridge for at least 30 minutes to marinate, preferably overnight.

Place peanuts into a food processor and process to a coarse crumb. Alternatively, crush peanuts in batches using a mortar and pestle. Set aside.

To make paste, place all ingredients in a food processor or blender and process to a coarse paste. Use a mortar and pestle, if you prefer.

Set aside.

To make salad, place cucumber, carrot, mint and coriander in a bowl and toss together. In a small jar place lime juice, palm sugar, water and sambal then seal and shake until sugar has dissolved.

Toss salad with dressing just before serving. Heat wok over medium heat, add paste and cook for 3 minutes or until fragrant and lightly caramalised. Add crushed peanuts, coconut milk, lime juice, soy sauce and palm sugar and stir until combined and heated through. Add extra soy sauce, palm sugar or lime juice until ideal balance between sweet, sour and salty is achieved. Keep warm on a very low heat until ready to serve. Meanwhile, thread chicken onto skewers (use gloves to avoid turmeric staining hands). Place on a barbecue or griddle pan over high heat and cook for 5 minutes each side or until cooked through. Serve skewers topped with satay sauce and fried shallots, and with salad on the side.

PORK ME PORK SPARE RIBS WITH APPLE AND FENNEL SLAW | SERVES 4 Feed this to your partner for some super soft pork action. Start this recipe a day ahead.

INGREDIENTS

• 1 star anise • Thumb-size piece ginger • 2 garlic cloves • ½ red onion, chopped • 2 tsp pepper • 1 tsp chili flakes • 2 tbs red wine vinegar • 2 tbs ketjap manis • 1 tbs fish sauce • 6 pork spare ribs (approximately 600g), skin-on • 1 tbs honey • Ketjap manis and chilli flakes, to serve Pickled chillies • 100ml white wine vinegar • 1 tsp salt • 1 tbs caster sugar • 2 long red chillies, thinly sliced Apple and fennel slaw • 1 green apple, cored, cut into julienne • 1 small fennel bulb, thinly sliced • Handful fresh coriander, chopped • ½ lime, juiced

DIRECTIONS To make marinade, using a mortar and pestle, grind star anise to a powder. Add ginger, garlic and onion and bash to a coarse paste. Add pepper, chilli, vinegar, ketjap manis and fish sauce, and stir until combined.

Coat spare ribs with marinade then place in an airtight container and refrigerate overnight.

Remove from fridge 30 minutes before cooking.

To make pickled chillies, heat vinegar, salt and sugar in a small saucepan and stir until sugar has dissolved. Pour liquid over sliced chillies, seal in an airtight container and set aside in fridge.

When ready to cook, preheat oven to 140°C. Wrap spare ribs in baking paper, then wrap and seal in foil. Place in a heavy-based roasting pan and bake for 3 hours.

Remove baking paper and foil, return ribs to roasting pan and drizzle with honey. Increase oven to 220°C and bake for a further 15 minutes or until lightly caramelised and sticky. Remove from heat and set aside to rest for 5 minutes.

Meanwhile, to make apple and fennel slaw, place apple, fennel and coriander in a bowl and toss with lime juice.

To serve, cut spare ribs into chunky pieces, drizzle with ketjap manis, sprinkle over chilli flakes and serve with pickled chilies and apple and fennel slaw.

February 2018

42

SHOULDER RUB SLOW-ROASTED LAMB SHOULDER WITH TZATZIKI | SERVES 8 The perfect dish for a big feast… or key party. The massage action will help the flavours penetrate deeper into the meat.

Start this recipe a day ahead.

INGREDIENTS • 1 large red onion, chopped • 4 garlic cloves • 1 tbs dried oregano • 2 tsp sweet paprika • 1 tsp cracked black pepper • 2 tsp sea salt • 1 lemon, juiced • 2 tbs red wine vinegar • ⅓ cup olive oil • 1 tbs honey

• 2-2.5kg bone-in lamb shoulder, excess fat trimmed • Lemon wedges, and seasonal sides of your choice, to serve Tzatziki

• 1 cup Greek yoghurt • 1 Lebanese cucumber, grated, juice squeezed out • Handful fresh dill, chopped • ½ lemon, juiced • ½ tsp finely grated garlic • 1 tsp salt • 4 tbs extra virgin olive oil DIRECTIONS To make marinade, place onion, garlic, herbs and spices, lemon juice, vinegar, oil and honey in a food processor and process to a coarse paste.

Coat lamb shoulder all over with marinade paste, then seal in an airtight

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container and refrigerate overnight to allow flavours to develop. Remove from fridge 1 hour before cooking.

To make tzatziki, combine all ingredients in a bowl, cover and refrigerate overnight.

When ready to cook, preheat oven to 140°C. Wrap lamb shoulder in baking paper then wrap and seal with foil, place in a heavy-based roasting pan and roast for 4 hours or until meat is tender and falling off the bone.

Remove baking paper and foil, return lamb to roasting pan, increase oven to 220°C, and roast for a further 1520 minutes or until lamb starts to caramelise. Remove from oven and set aside to rest for 10 minutes.

Using a fork, shred meat and serve with tzatziki, lemon wedges and a selection of your favourite sides.

February 2018

GET IT I DINING

Must taste this February If you only try six new things this month, let it be these.

Tropical Tastes

ari Crispy fried calam igh the much-loved Burle t added , tro Bis ak Ste ’s rry Ha jus ve ha es, frit ir the for steakhouse famous menu, and you’ll want to go try a few dishes to their will please the whole family is e them! One we’re sur ari, fragrant salad, coriander their crispy fried calamut. Sounds like a tropical pesto, chili and cocon dream! igh Gold Coast Hwy, Burle Where to try: 1744 2699 Heads | Phone: 5535

Colourful chaos

Graffiti Indriya, gressive dining venue, Brisbane's newest pro h called GRAFFITI. Inspired dis ure nat presents its sig chaos of graffiti art and by the randomness andour made from natural local col des green vandalism, it exu ot, butterfly pea flower, QLD ingredients beetro tures veal with an Oolong fea and ts. peas, and orange, other unique ingredien Tea dressing and many Spectacular!

Hill, chhardt Street, Spring Where to try: 106 Lei 6636 1 383 Brisbane | Phone:

February 2018

Sea Fresh

Kingfish Crudo Get away from the hustle Nero Dining's modern shaand bustle and indulge in cool, relaxed premise offe re plate experience. The style modern Australian rs a Spanish and Italian Yellow Peach, Davidson menu. Their Kingfish Crudo, is an ultimate crowd ple Plum and Torched Tomato aser!

Where to try: 3/1 Sunshin Waters | Phone: 552673 e Blvd, Broadbeach 64

Sweet tooth

Banana Tempura Desse rt Osushi Broadbeach at Ora more that just a sushi trai cle Boulevard is much Japanese dining experie n. The contemporary like the Banana Tempur nce also offers desserts a light batter with decade Dessert. It’s served in a nt vanilla ice cream and topped with mixed berries powdered sugar and ma , sweet red bean paste, ple syrup. Yum-O! Where to try: 12 Charles Ave, Broadbeach | Phone: 5570 2166

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Perfect Pizza

Italian Salami Pizza more than just Pancakes on the Rocks serve range of pizzas a up dish also y The s. pancake including the Italian (gluten-free bases available) mild Italian salami of s slice s bine com Salami that capsicum and black with Italian sausage, fresh red lla base. It’s topped zare moz and ato tom a olives on ce, onion rings and a with fresh oregano, mixed lettu ! yum — sing dres sar dash of Cea de, Surfers Paradise | Where to try: 4 The Esplana 0 Phone: 5570 625

Summer lovin'

Peachin’ Around’ cocktail ed a new cocktail Justin Lane have recently add ether ingredients tog gs brin ch to their menu whi on the Gold Coast. The that celebrate summer here tains rose, lillet rose, con l ktai Peachin’ Around’ coc t. It’s available by martini blanco, peach and minfor sharing with your the glass or carafe — perfect friends for some summer fun! d Coast Hwy, Burleigh Where to try: 1708-1710 Gol 7 851 6 557 Heads | Phone:

GET IT I DATING

Your Valentine’s Day sorted!

Whether you have a handsome beau or are a single, independent woman, we have everything you need to plan out your day right here

COUPLES IDEAS

SINGLES

While flowers and an evening dinner at a nice restaurant is nice, even nicer is going on a date that was basically created for you.

You may be slightly different when it comes to the following personality types, but at least one of you will love the date, and the other should simply love it because your partner loves it and is having the time of their life — that’s what true love is, right?

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about all those happy, sappy couples you see everywhere that secretly make you want to barf but also a little bit envious. It can be all about you and your girls.

Whether you’re recently single and despising ever dating again or happily single and loving ‘me’ time, there’s sure to be an idea that will have you loving how you spend your February 14 .

For the hard worker You work hard and work long hours. To you, Valentine’s Day is just another Wednesday where you’ll get home from the office late to your cats that are meowing to be fed. You are perfectly happy single, in fact, you don’t even have time to think of men.

What you need for your evening is some relaxation. Order Uber Eats or takeaway from your favourite Chinese restaurant. Have an at-home spa evening with a facemask, bath bomb and relaxing music. Do some yoga and meditate to thank your body for all its hard work. Or have some adult ‘me’ time with your vibrating friend in the nightstand drawer.

For the single, independent woman You are a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need no man (*snaps fingers*). You are perfectly content in your own company and, realistically, could do anything in the couple’s column by yourself because you are confident and empowered. Take yourself out for lunch, then follow that with a shopping spree at your favourite stores. Cook yourself a fabulous meal and have it by candlelight as you binge-watch your favourite Netflix show.

Or call up your girlfriends and do some of the below activities, because your single girlfriends are a whole lot of fun.

For the girl squad Gather the single girls, it’s time for a girl’s day! You don’t have to hit the clubs, but if you do, make it a night about the girls, not about each finding a guy. You could hold a chick-flick party and play back-to-back movies as you chat and nibble on sweet treats and pizza. Guaranteed to be a great time is a fondue night, a gift exchange (where you each bring a fab gift), or a day cruise.

An outfit exchange evening with wine will be beneficial for all involved — each person simply needs to bring items from their wardrobe that they no longer want to trade with the others. Or a weekend getaway is sure to be a blast, especially with the friends you have!

For the adrenaline junkie One or both of you love to get your heart racing, in and out of the bedroom, so an adrenaline-packed day is perfect as that adrenaline will stay pumping for when you get home later in the day (*wink, wink*). Face your fears and try skydiving or jet packing. Take it sky high with hot air ballooning, a Storey Bridge climb in Brisbane or tree hopping in Mount Tambourine. Or even head to the shooting range to feel like a badass, plus, you’ll find it such a turn on when he shows off his shooting skills.

For the young at heart If dinner and a movie sounds like a total snooze fest, you may be young at heart. You love fun activities and think we’re never too old to stop playing. Creative games full of smiles and laughs get the two of you off so head on over to one of these activities for a Valentine’s Day full of laughing with, and at, each other.

Release your inner child with indoor trampolining, paintball, indoor rock climbing, or horseback riding. Hit the local arcades like Timezone. Or have a blast at Infinity, ten pin bowling, mini golf or ice skating.

Old school romantics You think Valentine’s Day has become overrated and lost it’s true meaning. There’s never a better time to take it back to basics and create your own old school, romantic day or evening.

A themed dinner and movie night at home is sure to be a relaxing, romantic evening. You two could go out dancing or get some lessons if you’re looking to really step it up. A food and wine tour will be a hit with you both or even a trivia night to test out how much you really know. One last idea that is sure to bring romance is to recreate your first ever date, wouldn’t that be sweet?

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February 2018

GET IT I SOCIALS

GETSCENE

GIN-UARY LUNCH Old Tom Restaurant and Bar in Broadbeach welcomed some lucky Gold Coasters for a long lunch paired with gorgeous gin cocktails.

Diners delighted in local fresh produce, unique flavour and texture combinations and sensational tastes they have never experienced before.

Simply spectacular!

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February 2018

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GET IT I SOCIALS

GETSCENE

MAGIC MILLIONS RACEDAY The worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s richest sales-based incentive raceday, Magic Millions, has produced another extravaganza event with everything from high glamour to high stakes. Gold Coasters and visitors from around the state and country attended to cheer their favourite horse on or take a share in a runner. Great day out as always!

Photography by Dave Goudie

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time for romance!

The Best Little Shoe Boutique in Town! shoesonchevron.com.au

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February 2018

GET IT I SOCIAL SOCIALMEDIA MEDIA

ke it

e m o s e g a p r u o Show y y a D s ’ e n i t n e l a V s i love th t’s the month of love but you’re definitely not feeling the love on your social media.Your engagement is dismal and your followers are dropping like flies. Even the 30 #hashtags you add to every post barely help to scrap the barrel of online ‘likes’.

But fear not! We have compiled a fool-proof list of everything you need to do to show your social media accounts some TLC. Update your cover and profile photos If you haven’t changed either of these two images in over a month (or if you didn’t even know you could change them — eep!), now is the time to do it across all your social media platforms. Make sure to change your cover photo to highlight your business’s current offers every 2-4 weeks.The cover photo is the first image people see when they click on your profile, so make sure its visually appealing and draws them in! Also changing your profile image regularly will keep your page feeling fresh and current, enticing viewers to click on your content as the notification appears in their news feeds. Remember: more activity = more engagement.

Update your hashtags for Instagram Just like fashion trends, hashtags can go out of season. Consistently updating your list of hashtags with popular Instagram hashtags every month, but not the most popular tags, will give your content a great chance of being seen. It’s best to avoid the most popular hashtags because the chance of your content being seen when 1,000 posts every minute are posted with that hashtag is very slim.

Find hashtags that are popular but niche to the specific audience you want to target. Ensure your hashtags are also relevant, if you’re selling jewellery you don’t want to be hashtagging #gymjunkie because you’ll miss your target audience entirely. Remember, people searching for fellow protein shake drinking weight lifters probably won’t care about a new pair of tassel earrings you just made.

February 2018

not Frustrated that you’re ent you getting the engagem edia? hoped for on social m is here Get it’s Caillin Palmero to help share the love

Engage with your followers It may seem self explanatory but to get engagement you have to engage. Unless you’re an A-lister or social media famous, you need to reply to people’s comments on your page, respond to messages and, on Instagram, comment on other people’s pages, like other content (particularly on hashtags you use) and follow people.You don’t have to follow everyone who follows you though －— sometimes people are just following you to get you to follow them then they’ll unfollow — not nice, we know.

Active engagement with your followers, and potential new followers, will increase the likelihood of them remembering your brand and revisiting your page too. Just don’t fall for the Instagram bot trend.

There are bots and apps that will follow, comment and like for you, and while it seems tempting if you’re time-poor, any sort of automation on Instagram strictly violates the platform’s terms of use. Using Instagram bots can get your account banned or shadowbanned (where Instagram makes you temporarily ‘un-discoverable’)!

Take advantage of stories Lasting just 24 hours, Instagram and Facebook’s ‘Stories’ are a great way to post updates without damaging your profile’s theme or flow.

They’re not new updates but if you’re yet to use them,there’s no time like the present! You can go live to announce flash sales, promotional codes or even a ‘behind the scenes’ look at your brand. Stories give you the opportunity to see which of your followers are viewing and engaging with your content too.

Just ensure your stories are relevant to the people who follow you and in line with your business. If not, your followers will quickly learn to skip your story as they think you don’t have anything of interest to show or say to them.

Remember ladies, the more active you are online, the more likely your engagement will increase. With these tips to freshen up your social media, it won’t be long before you’re once again feeling the love online.

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GET IT I STARS

Get your horoscope About Cassandra Tyndall Cassandra is an avid professional astrologer, writer and teacher, based in Brisbane, Australia. Her interest in Astrology started when she was a child reading horoscopes in her mother's magazines. Known for her honesty, passion and insight, Cassandra offers consultations to people all over the globe. cassandratyndall.com

H AQUARIUS January 21 – February 19 Progress is possible under this month’s New Moon eclipse on the 16th. New intentions about the person you wish to be, and what you wish to achieve, can be made. However, new beginnings don’t begin until the old is surrendered. Your challenge is to be brave enough to let go of old ideals or attitudes. A link between your ruler Saturn and Venus suggests you have the support to make it happen.

H PISCES February 19 – March 20 Rest and retreat may be needed under the New Moon eclipse on the 16th. Falling in your most private and personal space, you may need time to rest and restore while you detox from unwanted or old energies, and welcome in the new. One of the most fortunate links between Venus and Neptune occurs in your sign on the 22nd. This annual event can prompt new inspiration and help you move forward in a situation close to your heart.

H ARIES March 20 – April 19 Adventure and discovery are key themes this month as your patron planet tours your 9th sector. A link from Neptune on the 17th/18th may prompt the desire for escape, or even a sabbatical. Getting in touch with your spiritual side is also highlighted. February may not be your

Who do

most productive month, but tapping into new discoveries that stir your soul with be well worth it.

H TAURUS April 20 – May 21 The most divine alignment between your planetary ruler and romantic Neptune occurs on the 22nd. By highlighting compassion and forgiveness, any hiccups or missed opportunities for connection from earlier in the month can be restored. Your best support may come from your dearest friends, your alliances, or even your work colleagues.

H GEMINI May 21 – June 21 An eclipse in your discovery sector on the 16th may open up a new world of possibilities for learning, travel or international opportunities. It may be the connections you make online that pave the way for you to expand your reach. New friendships and alliances can be formed that may prove to be long-lasting pillars of support.

H CANCER June 21 – July 22 A New Moon will trigger your financial sector on the 16th. With Mercury in the mix, new ideas on how to create the financial security you crave can help you make solid plans. As this is a South Node eclipse, surrendering old ideas or how things ‘used to be’ can liberate both your mind and your bank account.

H LEO July 22 – August 23 A fresh start is possible in a significant relationship as a New Moon eclipse lights up your 7th sector on the 16th. Slates can only be clean if you’re prepared to let the past go. Communication is the key to release as Mercury aligns with this lunation. Venus and Saturn also connect, suggesting that the support you receive now will be long lasting.

H VIRGO August 23 - September 22 Mercury, your patron planet, tours your 6th sector and joins the New Moon eclipse on

the 16th. You’re cosmically prompted to scale back non-essential tasks and responsibilities in order to free up your most precious resource — time. There is a fine line between being of service and being a slave, and this eclipse can help you realise the difference.

H LIBRA September 22 – October 23 Solid progress can be made socially or creatively as a New Moon eclipse on the 16th inspires a heightened sense of joy. This includes your friendships, hobbies, romances and children.

If you’re looking to attract more fun into your life, you may have to let go of ideas you have around how you think things should be.

H SCORPIO October 23 – November 22 New beginnings are possible under the New Moon eclipse on the 16th. As this lunation aligns with the South Node, letting go of the past is your key to moving forward. Mercury in the mix offers the chance for open and insightful conversations, where togetherness and long-lasting support from loved ones can be achieved.

H SAGITTARIUS November 22 – December 22 The 12th sees a link between your patron planet Jupiter and the Sun. If you’re feeling overstretched, you may need to reassess your priorities. If you’re not doing enough to establish your desires, then the Sun’s light can help you push forward. A South Node eclipse on the 16th can help you let go of distractions or old ways of thinking.

H CAPRICORN December 22 – January 20 As a new level of personal responsibility emerges, this month’s astrology invites you to look at your bottom line. While there is plenty of opportunity to set new intentions, and create momentum around your income and cash flow, the secret of your success will lie in letting go of old attitudes and habits around money.

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February 2018

GET IT I LAST WORD

letter to Erika

A

Sarah Blinco on loving life now

t was late one afternoon last week when a friend and colleague, Erika, popped over to my desk to have a chat. Bright and bubbly, I enjoy her visits, tea in hand and the promise of gossip in her eyes.

I knew she’d had a tough month, predominantly because of the insensitive actions of a boy who did not deserve her affection.

In her usual style, she wandered over to me with a warm smile, perched on my desk and commenced with a monologue about how she saw herself, saying she’d been thinking a lot lately about how by now she should be ‘more successful and further ahead in her life and career’.

I objected, not just on the grounds that I’m her friend, but ‘Success’ at any because of my own burning question: ‘What is the definition age is not about of being ahead?’ comparison to what Predictably the response your friends are doing. involved comparisons to what fellow university graduates from Social media poses a the recent class of 201…? are problem for many on doing, and her reflections on the aforementioned relationship this front, and if you that went cold. relate, switch if As someone (vaguely) older off for a while. looking at her situation, I’ve seen Erika secure an excellent job in a respected business where she started working as a temp; she impressed people personally and professionally, put in a lot of hard work and has, in a short space of time, developed into a PR pro. She learns every day, as we all do, but continues to ride the wave gracefully.

I believe Erika’s story is impressive. For her to tell me she feels disappointed about the success that I can see clearly, well, I had to give her a loving nudge! Aside from the proud job situation, she’d also completed a Master’s degree in the past year, and diligently dealt with personal life challenges.

With age arguably comes wisdom, and I’m going to stick with that logic. I shared with Erika that from my perspective there are two important things you can use to ‘measure your success’: how happy you are, and your ability to cover expenses. Yes, if these elements need to be addressed, then do so! But when all

February 2018

was said and done, Erika admitted she’s happy, and can cover her rent plus purchase wine on the weekend.

‘Success’ at any age is not about comparison to what your friends are doing. Social media poses a problem for many on this front, and if you relate, switch if off for a while. If we did the same thing at the same time as our contemporaries, would we necessarily love life? No. In my humble view, success is being happy. It is simple. It is your gratitude for life and acceptance of choices.

It is not ‘how far ahead you are’ － whatever that is supposed to mean.

Someone said to me not so long ago that I should be further ahead in my career. While I respect their opinion, that view is narrow. Granted, it is one that is still understood by a wide range of education, media, and corporate types, but it’s not relevant, especially in 2018. I’m incredibly proud of everything I’ve done － the cool, the crazy, the difficult, the brave moves that have meant my ‘career’ path has not been linear. Confidently I declare that it’s been liberating and exciting and varied.

I’ve been happy. And I pay my debts, just like a Lannister (apologies, couldn’t resist).

So, I write to “Erika” here, that aspirations are amazing and reveal passion and drive, things I stand for in life. Go after what lights you up; but turn comparison and an immediate feeling that you want more, into intention. This will bring awesome things to you in good time.

For now, live in the moment, embrace it. Think about what life presently holds that you love, nurture that, and you’ll get ahead for sure.

How do you see it? Share the love with us on social media this month.

Get it girl Sarah Blinco is a business communications professional. She blogs at travellivelearn.com and @sarahblinco on Instagram.

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• Two level luxury • Direct beach access • 3 spacious bedrooms • Gourmet kitchen

You deserve this...

Book your 2018 Escape now! FREECALL on 1800 072078 info@accomnoosa.com.au • www.accomnoosa.com.au Mention “GETIT” on booking. Valid for New low season bookings staying a minimum 3 nights or more in 2018. *Terms and conditions apply.