TO PERSUADE To obtain what you want.

TO PERSUADE

You might want a raise from your employer, a partnership with a new business that has opened, or maybe just an extra dip for your chicken fingers without paying an extra 50-cent fee.

However, you don't want to turn this into an argument that will escalate.

To do this, let's look at the definition of the words, argue and persuade.

An argument explains what someone believes, while persuasion attempts to change someone else's opinion. Arguments typically examine both sides of an issue and then form a final opinion based on the evidence.

Persuasion is more one-sided because you want others to believe that your idea is the best.

You can get a lot in life just by convincing someone else to give it to you, but they won't give it to you without a good reason.

Your greatest tool for getting what you want is through the psychology of persuasion.

Here are some tricks you can use to get what you want:

1. Be confident: your first step is to stay confident and project throughout your call. The surer you are of yourself, the more convincing your arguments will be and the more powerful you will appear.

Self-confidence is easy to fake and hard to tell apart, so don't be afraid if you don't feel confident, just act confident, and that will probably be enough.

Trust subtly implies that you are already convinced that you are going to get what you want, which subtly influences the other party to give it to you.

Just be careful not to overdo your display of confidence, or you run the risk of arrogantly pushing people away.

2. Present a logical argument: people are easily persuaded by logic.

However, it should always be kept in mind that persuasion is the process of convincing an adversary to change their beliefs or behavior through moral or logical arguments rather than force.

When a person is persuaded to do something, they do it because they have come to believe that it is the right thing to do.

For example, suppose you persuade your co-worker to take on one of the toughest parts of an assignment you're working on together.

Initially, your colleague might resist, but you can use a logical argument to explain that he is better equipped to handle this section, which means that the mission will be carried out faster and more efficiently, making you both look good and helping the company in its approach.

3. Make it seem beneficial to the other party: one of the most effective means of persuasion is to make your request seem valid to the other party. It can be tricky, but under the right circumstances, it can be just fine.

For example, let's say you're trying to convince a friend to help you move house. Obviously, there's a lot of work involved in moving, and your friend may not be so willing to accept.

Instead of talking about all the furniture you need to move, talk about the fun you'll have exchanging pleasantries and discussing sports and buying pizza and a good beer to celebrate the day.

4. Choose your words carefully: some words have inherently greater value than others, and some words have more positive associations than others.

Take the time to choose the words that will positively vibrate the discussion. In the process, you will become a better communicator, which will make you seem smarter and more thoughtful, and therefore more reliable.

5. Use flattery: you know that a good percentage of the population will see you coming quickly if you are too direct or obvious. Instead of outright corrupting your subject with frivolous flattery, use subtle phrasing and supportive and above all proportionate remarks to flatter your interlocutor.

6. Be patient, but persistent: you can't always convince you are subject to give you what you want on the first try. If you can't, don't resort to pleading or arguing. Instead, let go of the situation, pull yourself together, and try again later.

Your persuasive messages will stay in the person's subconscious, and the next time you bring up the argument, you'll have a chance to sound more reasonable and persuasive. Don't give up on your goal but allow plenty of time between attempts.

Remember that persuasion is a skill that can be perfected and improved over time.

You probably won't be successful, the first time you practice the tips above, but the more often you use them, the more skilled and, natural you will be in performing them.

Be careful not to manipulate or intimidate people. Rather, your goal should be to help them see things in a different light.