VOL 12 NO 5
NIGERIA DREAMS
DARE TO HOPE
GOD still ANSWERS PRAYERS
LESSONS LEARNT
OF MY
FRIENDS IN DISGUISE
MORAYO AFOLABI-BROWN Host of Your View, The number one breakfast chat show in Nigeria
SPEAKS ON HER HOPE FOR NIGERIA AND THE FUTURE
Team PUBLISHER/CEO Bolanle Olawale EDITOR Toluwalase Olawale CREATIVE/GRAPHICS ARTIST Tonye Edet DIGITAL/TECHNICAL SUPPORT Adura Arowolo SALES AND LOGISTICS Francis Unufe CONTRIBUTORS Kingsley Okonkwo, Kehinde Adollo, Busola Jegede, Liz Kingsley, Dr Akinfemi Akingboye, Dr Chinyere Almona, Olamide Elizabeth Adeleye, Olufunlola Ifebogun, Lara Yeku, Sarah Williams, Ola Asags, Boma Oruambo, Ibironke Olubamise, Dayo Oluwasanmi, Taiwo Katherine Isijola, Oluseyi Farinu CHAIRMAN ’Kunle Olawale gemWoman is digitally published by gem Publications Ltd. All Rights Reserved, © 2020 For subscriptions and advert enquiries, please call or visit #10 Jide Ayo Close, Omole Phase 1, Ikeja, Lagos, Nigeria WhatsApp: +234 706 931 4010 Email: editor@gemwoman.net Website: www.gemwoman.net Follow us on instagram: @gemmagazines and @gem.event Like us on facebook: gemmagazines
gemwoman.net 7
Contents gemWOMAN MAGAZINE
32 GREY AREAS
VOL 12 NO 5
Just Say “NO!”
“
36
ETIQUETTE
Nation building is a collective effort and young people must begin to identify the best
Communication Etiquette
amongst them and groom each other for leadership.
ISSUES OF THE HEART
42
COVER INTERVIEW Morayo Afolabi-Brown Host of Your View, The number one breakfast chat show in Nigeria 45
ENDSARS FEATURE Lessons from the ENDSARS Protest: Friends in Disguise
57
Temitope Omoyefa
74
Joy Chizoba Chianu
76
Olawunmi Idowu
78
The Woman and Her Changing
TESTIMONY
Relationships 60
God Still Answers Prayers
BSS
KANDID TALKS
Body Soul and Spirit Global 2020
64
80
ABC steps in Achieving Executive Presence
82
ENDSARS FEATURE #ENDSARS Nigerians
PRAYERS
in the Diaspora speak out 70
Prayers for our Nation
Tomi Favored Alesh
71
Anita Adefuye
73
86
CUISINE Easy to Make Desserts
36 POEM
HAIR CARE
Hope 13
Proven Tips That Promote Hair Growth
Spiced Apple Galette
91
Fried Yeast Doughnuts
92
Spiced Apple Filling
94
Dark Chocolate Mousse
95
22
FROM THE PUBLISHER’S DESK Hopeful 14
FEATURE Should Christians Be Part Of Protests? 28
APPLES OF GOLD Quotes On Hope
18
LIGHT REFLECTIONS Living Expectant
8 gemwoman.net
32
90 gemwoman.net 9
Contributors Taiwo Katherine Isijola is a seasoned expert on International Protocol and
Olufunmilola Ifebogun is the CEO of Blooms Soft Furnishing, which she
Etiquette. Taiwo’s passion is to make an impactful difference to humanity by
established in 1994 and is fast gaining recognition within and outside Nigeria.
promoting societal dignity, decorum and values..
She is an associate of Dorothy Van Riet Design Academy in South Africa and also possesses a Diploma in Color Concept from Interior Design, Texas, USA.
Dr. Mrs Alarape Oluwasanya is a Senior Registrar in Family Medicine at the
Olamide Elizabeth Adeleye is a chartered Arbitrator and a legal practitioner
Olabisi Onabanjo University Teaching Hospital and a member of the West
who specializes in Corporate Law and Real Estate. She is also a pastor, and
African College of Physicians. She is also a certified Geriatrician. She attends
a poet. She currently runs her own legal practice and oversees the Women’s
Chapel of Victory, Sagamu where she works in the Children’s Department.
Ministry of God’s Favourite House Church, Lekki.
Married to Dr. Richard Oluwasanya and mother of two adorable children
Her passion is to help women acquire the drive to thrive and not just survive in
Aseoluwa and Araifeoluwa.
all spheres of life. She is joyfully married and blessed with two nations.
Kingsley Okonkwo is a popular TV host, certified Relationship coach and
Kehinde Adollo is a Profile Marketing communications expert who just wants
highly sought after speaker with well over 20 years’ experience. He is the
to make a change in every little way she can. She loves to be in the company of
founder and lead Pastor of David’s Christian Centre in Lagos. His wit, humour
good and inspiring people. The God factor has been her support through the
and real life styled teachings have made him a darling of the media. He is
years She often asks herself, “where will I be without him?”
married to his best friend Mildred and they are blessed with children.
Dr. Chinyere Almona is a versatile inspirational speaker and Bible teacher.. She
Oluseyi Farinu is a Nigerian Canadian Pastry Chef based in the beautiful
is passionate about leadership and people development. Professionally, she
Vancouver, British Columbia. She is passionate about God and good food. At
has over twenty-six years of work experience, providing strategic support to
Honey and Grace, her goal is to bring joy to her client’s momentous occasions
companies and currently leads a series of corporate governance interventions
through consistent, quality, and delicious treats that anyone will love to eat
across sub-Saharan Africa. She lives in Lagos, Nigeria, where she serves
and be proud to share with your guests. You can check out her work on her
alongside her husband, Pastor Obi Almona.
Instagram page @honeyandgracehouse and @seyi_farinu.
Dayo Oluwasanmi is an unpretentious woman who loves God with all her
Toluwalase Olawale is a law student and beauty entrepreneur from Dallas,
heart, Dayo Oluwasanmi is passionate about fulfilling purpose and maximising
Texas by way of Lagos, Nigeria. She is passionate about travel, youth
potential. Undertaking a PhD program in her fifties combined with the
mentoring, advocacy and authentic living as a Christian. She shares on her
demands of motherhood and career, she is committed to shattering the glass
podcast “Live Intentional” practical tips, and applicational scripture that aid
ceiling in her own sphere of life. She is married with three children and based
in self-betterment, and that of the world at large.
in the UK.
10 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 11
POEM
Connect with Us
@gemmagazines
@gemmagazines
@gemmagazines
H O P E Everything may seem in a state of disrepair Don’t lose heart, don’t give up in despair Look up! In Him we have a great hope You do not have to cope In us, He’s the hope of glory He’s working to change your story So you will not worry We call Him the Balm in Gilead He holds your hand so you will be led Give Him your scars He’ll turn them into stars Give Him your pains He’ll turn them to gains Give Him your worry He’ll rewrite it into a beautiful story Give Him what’s left of your money He’ll give you a testimony Give Him your life’s strains From them He’ll bring the new rains Give him all the wrongs And you’ll be singing new songs For your unspeakable shame Don’t worry, it’s a new name For the glory of His fame Yours are not the shadows Look up to see the rainbows You will know no sorrow For He cares even for the sparrow Girlfriend, rejoice and smell the rains He’s filling your threshing floor with grains For out of the darkness Emerges the brightness ~Lamaide Adeleye © 2020
12 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 13
From the Publisher’s Desk
Hopeful W
e live in unprecedented times
“normal” going to look like? Will the
testimony on God still answers prayer
as there is continued social
vaccine work? How long will it last? So
will inspire anyone that is tempted to
distancing, wearing of masks and of
many questions – and so many remain
give up on God. Can you dare to hope
course Zoom meetings continue. Like
unanswered.
will make you rethink and re align
most of you it keeps looking like a year
yourself with God’s promises for you.
we would like to skip. However in the
No matter what the outcome is, we
Can Christians partake in protests?
midst of all the pandemic, protests,
must bear in mind that we can adapt
This will certainly be a conversation
riots, and record breaking natural
and overcome. This is something I
piece at many gatherings.
disasters around the world, we cannot
have had to learn to embrace and make
lose hope.
a valiant effort in practicing.
Our cover feature; Morayo Afolabi brown speaks candidly on her future
We have to keep believing that
The stories we selected for this issue
tomorrow will be better and the day
are intended to reassure you that
after. We have to keep doing our best
hope and triumphs still remain. The
and hopes for Nigeria. My hope for you is that you will find
to keep the dream alive and our heads
hope can always be found in times of
time to explore these pages and draw
above water. This is true not only in our
despair.
inspiration and hope from all the
businesses, but also in life generally. Now more than ever it is imperative
It has become quite difficult to stay
that we collectively stay connected as
motivated when uncertainty seems
this has become vital to our personal
to be the only constant. We find
well-being.
ourselves anxious about the coming months while our country and even
This
is
why
our
at
the world seems to be in turmoil and
gemwomanMagazine decided to put
unrest. Are things ever going to go
together this issue to remind you that
back to “normal,” and what is this new
14 gemwoman.net
team
My hope for you is that you will find time to explore these pages and draw inspiration and hope from all the amazing things and people we have here in the magazine.
amazing things and people we have here in the magazine.So sit back, relax and enjoy. Things are certainly looking hopeful. Warmest regards Bolanle Olawale Publisher @Bolanlegemwoman
gemwoman.net 15
gem HIV / AIDS Initiative (gHAI) is a community enhancement and support initiative established for the purpose of improving the quality of living of the less privileged in the society. The initiative started out as an intervention for the people living with HIV / AIDS, to provide them a total support system that caters for their proper health management, housing nutrition, clothing, education, finance, etc.
Passionate about Real Estate Chioma Lorraine Omotayo is a Texas Top Producer based in Dallas TX. The C.E.O of CLO Dallas Realty LLC, (powered by Ready Real Estate) is a full service real estate company that provides
.
world-class residential and commercial real estate services since 2013.
We: Feed children breakfast three a week in 5 Government Secondary Schools in Lagos State (gHAI Feed-A-Child)
.
Organize Yearly Christmas Party and provision of clothes and food stuff for over 300 children living with HIV / AIDS, to give them the feel of Christmas (gHAI Children Christmas Party)
.
Organize HIV / AIDS awareness campaign in GovernmentSecondary Schools in Lagos State. (Preserving the next generation campaign) Please contact: 08060150740 or 08023674147, Website: www.ghai.gemwoman.net Details: FCMB: GEM PUBLICATIONS - 2138473018 / SKYE BANK: GEM PUBLICATIONS - 1770066107
+1 (917)-244-7720 email:clodallasrealtygroup@gmail.com
HOPE APPLES OF GOLD
APPLES OF GOLD
QUOTES ON
H
“Courage is like love; it must have
ope is a powerful thing. It inspires us to do the impossible and helps us carry
hope for nourishment.”
on during difficult times. And hope can come in many different shapes and
– Napoleon Bonaparte
forms. It may be through scriptures, experiences or inspirational words “To them God has chosen to make
The following hope quotations from the scripture and motivational quotes can
known among the Gentiles the
be added to your daily prayers, declarations and serve as a reminder of the power
glorious riches of this mystery, which
of hope.
is Christ in you, the hope of glory.”
– C o l o s s i a n s 1:27 “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
– I s a i a h 40:31 May the God of hope fill you with all
“Hope lies in dreams, in imagination,
joy and peace as you trust in him, so
and in the courage of those who dare to make dreams into reality.”
“The very least you can do in your life
– Jonas Salk
is figure out what you hope for. And
that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
– R o m a n s 15:13
the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance but live right in it, under its roof.”
— Barbara Kingsolver
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”
– J e r e m i a h 29:11
18 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 19
APPLES OF GOLD
APPLES OF GOLD
“Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And
“Hope is the companion of power, and
now these three remain: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of these is love.”
– 1 C o r i n t h i a n s 13:13
“We must accept finite
mother of success; for who so hopes
“Hope is the only bee that makes
strongly has within him the gift of
honey without flowers.”
miracles.”
– Robert Green Ingersoll
– Samuel Smiles
disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”
— Martin Luther King, Jr.
“He who has health, has hope; and he
“You will be secure, because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety.” – Job 11:18-19
Hope is being able to see that there is
who has hope has everything.”
light despite all of the darkness.”
– Thomas Carlyle
– Desmond Tutu “It’s always something, to know you’ve done the most you could. But, don’t leave off hoping, or it’s of no use doing anything. Hope, hope to the last.”
– Charles Dickens “To live without hope is to cease to “Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”
“Let your hopes, not your hurts,
live.”
shape your future.”
– Fyodor Dostoyevsky
– R o b e r t H. S c h u l l e r
– Helen Keller
20 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 21
HAIR CARE
HAIR CARE
Proven Tips That Promote Hair Growth
I
Toluwalase Olawale
f you have kinky, coarse or afro textured hair, it may seem as though your hair takes a long time to grow and, in some cases, might even be prone to unwanted breakage. You might have tried different remedies and it seems like nothing is working. You might even be tempted to cut all your hair off, or just accept the fact that your hair is just not meant to grow.
Don’t give up yet, there are a few
Consider protein conditioners. These
things you can still do to encourage
can strengthen some types of hair, but
hair growth and make sure your locks
may damage dry hair. Here is a test you
stay healthy.
can do to identify what type of hair you have: when brushing your hair, if your
Don’t abuse your hair. Excessive use
strands stretch significantly before
of hot tools like flat irons and blow
breaking, you may need more protein.
dryers, tight braiding, tight sew-in weaves, dye and frequent perms ruin
Do not leave in a protein conditioner
your hair. These can cause damage and
longer than instructed on the label, or
breakage, so use them as infrequently
it may turn your hair hard and brittle.
as possible. Moisturize. Water strengthens dry Trim damaged hair. Trim the ends
hair and may stimulate your hair
of your hair every three months, or
roots. You can apply water, a water
whenever they start to split. If your
based moisturizing conditioner, or a
hair is healthy, you may only need to
mixture of olive and coconut oil. For
remove 1–2 inches (2.5–5cm) every
extra moisture, apply each oil, in that
three or four months. It may seem odd
order. Apply your oils as the last step of
to trim your hair to help it grow, but it
your hair care routine as they help seal
really does help. Split ends rapidly lead
in moisture.
to breakage, making it very hard to grow your hair out and retain length.
Apply hair oil daily. Rub natural oils to the middle and ends of your hair to
Remove products with neutralizing shampoo. Once a month, use a neutralizing shampoo to clean all products out of your hair and restore your hair’s pH. If you use a lot of sprays, gels, and other styling products, use the shampoo every other week.
22 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 23
HAIR CARE
HAIR CARE
soften and fortify hair strands. This will help prevent breakage and can help in length retention. Jamaican oil, castor oil, argan oil, jojoba oil, Moroccan oil, and lavender oil are all good options.
Covering your hair with a satin scarf at night can help your hair retain the moisture and protect your sheets. Grease your scalp when it’s dry. If you have a perm, grease only once a week, or apply a hot oil treatment instead. Let hair dry on its own. The heat from blow drying can cause damage, leading your hair to break before it grows to the desired length. Alternatively, dry your hair by wrapping it in a t-shirt and allowing it to dry. A t-shirt is better
Let hair dry on its own. The heat from blow drying can cause damage, leading your hair to break before it grows to the desired length. 24 gemwoman.net
than using a towel as it dries the hair without interrupting your curl pattern and natural moisture. Wash your hair only when you must. Washing hair too often strips it of natural oils. Try washing it once a
gemwoman.net 25
HAIR CARE
Covering your hair with a satin scarf at night can help your hair retain the moisture and protect your sheets. week. Switch to once every two or three weeks if your hair starts to break easily.
To reduce damage, wash hair in
Try to find a moisturizing shampoo or
lukewarm water and rinse in cool
one that doesn’t leave your hair feeling
water to close the hair cuticle and
too dry.
prevent moisture loss. gw
26 gemwoman.net
F E AT URE
F E AT URE
Should Christians Be Part Of Protests?
S
Bolanle Olawale
hould Christians be a part of peaceful protests? That is a question some people have asked especially since the wave of the ENDSARS movement which recently occurred all over Nigeria. Is there a place for Christians in protesting against regimes or injustice in whatever form? In order for this question to be
an account. Do this so that their work
answered biblically it is important
will be a joy, not a burden, for that
to ask “What would Jesus do in the
would be of no benefit to you”.
face of injustice”? Are there any Bible verses that speak to participating in
Others will argue that the Bible
protests? We know as Christians we
admonishes us to “Open your mouth
are in this world but not of this world
for the mute, for the rights of all who
hence regardless of what we think or
are destitute” (Prov 31:8), and to
feel, the Bible should always act as our
“Open your mouth, judge righteously,
compass.
defend the rights of the poor and needy” (Prov 31:9). Surely the youth
While some might argue that
are those who are “mute” and we need
protesting is a form of disrespect to
to “defend the rights” of those who
those in authority citing the scripture
cannot defend themselves, but should
in Heb 13:7NIV as their reason. “Have
Christians protest or demonstrate?
confidence in your leaders and submit
In itself, there’s nothing wrong with
to their authority, because they keep
protesting or demonstrating because
watch over you as those who must give
28 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 29
F E AT URE
we are to “Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good” (Rom 12:9). I believe the operational word for us as Christians should be peaceful and this could be expressed by engaging in prayer walks, organizing vigils, speaking the truth in love. There are appropriate ways to protest injustice with civility and respect. We have a right to gather peaceably to express grievances and outrage at what we perceive to be injustice. We must make a distinction between individuals who are exercising their Constitutional right to peaceably
I believe the operational word for us as Christians should be peaceful and this could be expressed by engaging in prayer walks, organizing vigils, speaking the truth in love.
protest and others who have taken this to another step and instigated rioting, violence, vandalism, destruction of property, physical brutality, and in some cases murder. The current confusion lies in trying to distinguish which group is which. As Christians we should only be found on the side of peace. So the question whether Christians should participate in protests would be better addressed by asking a variation of that question “How should Christians participate in protests”? gw
30 gemwoman.net
LIGHT REFLECTIONS
LIGHT REFLECTIONS
Living Expectant Bolanle Olawale
I
had a conversation with a young lady late last year. I asked her about her expectations for the year 2020 and she
promptly answered, “None.” That answer caught me off guard. “Why?” I asked, bewildered that anyone would go into the year with no expectations. She replied without any emotions. “Last year, I was very expectant and none of the things happened, so this year I have decided not to expect anything, so I won’t be disappointed”. Life at times can be hard and this year has definitely been more difficult than most.
32 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 33
LIGHT REFLECTIONS
LIGHT REFLECTIONS
expectancy. It is important that while we wait for God’s plans, we continue
Having an attitude of expectancy builds the foundation for something great to happen. We have a few weeks till the end of the year.
to create the atmosphere. You can do this by being thankful. No matter how bad things look, there are still some things to be thankful for. Surround yourself with Praise. Your spirit will definitely experience a lifting in this atmosphere. Having the right friends is also very important. You need people who will add to you and not deplete you, especially in lower periods of life. Sometimes I think we forget that the law of sowing and reaping is a promise of God. We have to believe it and walk
Should we then stop being expectant
you ask of me” people; I recently began
I want to be a “whatever it takes”
everyday with our head held high and
because we have had some challenges?
studying the miracles of Jesus and a
kind of woman. I want to be the kind
expectant because God never breaks
common factor in all the miracles is the
of person who is always expectant,
His promises
I think a lot of times we are so expectant
fact that the people who received the
knowing that because I have sown, I
of things to come, and that is a great
miracles were all ready to do whatever
will see the promises of God take over
Do you want to see change? Invest, take
thing! However, I believe there is a
Jesus asked them to do.
in my life.
action and watch how God changes
difference between expectancy and
your life!
mere wishing. In our spiritual lives,
You see, everyone wants to see
An attitude of expectancy is therefore
in our businesses, and even in our
a breakthrough in their lives or
an outlook of hope.
marriages we often expect a change
relationship with God, many will
but are simply not willing to invest
declare “I am expecting my best year
The attitude that you have while
happen. We have a few weeks till the
what is necessary to see the change.
yet!” But very few people dare to say,
waiting for something is a very
end of the year. Great things can still
“I am willing to do WHATEVER it takes
important key. An attitude of
happen. Change your mindset and hold
Expectation without investment is just
to see breakthroughs in these areas of
expectancy is contagious because
on to God’s word. Live expectant!! gw
a wish. We need to become “whatever
my life”.
it can create an atmosphere of
34 gemwoman.net
Having an attitude of expectancy builds the foundation for something great to
gemwoman.net 35
GREY AREAS
GREY AREAS
Just Say by Tonja Taylor
“NO!” I
enjoy meeting people and being hospitable, and the Word commands us to do that (Romans 12:12-14). However, there may be times when, no matter what the tradition has been, or what a family member expects or thinks about it, that you must say “No” to them. I encountered this very recently when a relative who lives several states away just decided she would come down and visit, arriving when she wanted and leaving when she wanted. She was supposed to come down for an important family event, but insisted she stay with us, instead of getting a hotel.
36 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 37
GREY AREAS
GREY AREAS
This woman has flown all over the
I do love both this relative and her
home, especially while my husband
world and does what she wants pretty
husband, and, at Christmas, my
and I were working.
much when she wants. She has no
husband insisted they stay no matter
children, and I suppose, no current job.
what I thought about it, even though
Before and after work, we both spend
they made the schedule they wanted
time with the LORD. We do pray
and we had to work around it. However,
together, but we personally spend
we were both blessed to be off for the
private time with Jesus. We value that
There were many reasons for this. The
holidays while they were in town, so
time very highly. It has taken years to
main one, however, was that, although
things worked more smoothly than
get to this place, but it is so worth it!
I had tolerated her and her husband
they would have if we were working.
This time, I said, “NO!”
doing this at Christmas time, even
There is nothing like private time with
the end.
though it disrupted several things, I
I still had to ask the LORD to help me
knew deep within that I did not need to
adjust spiritually and emotionally. It
allow that this time. It is a new season
is good to be unselfish and giving, and
So, knowing that if the relative came,
Truth (John 16:13), knows all things.
for my husband and me, and there
showing hospitality is an excellent
our private time would be interrupted,
Every time I have trusted Him and
have been many challenges we have
way to do that.
and that, because we were both
what I knew He was helping me
working outside the home now that
know in my heart—no matter what
However, my privacy was invaded and
our private time with each other and
the circumstances seemed like, nor
I did not have the freedom to be with
especially the LORD was more valuable
what others said—I was thankful,
the LORD as usual. Since our daughter
than ever, knew the Holy Spirit was
protected, and blessed.
had grown up and went to college
instructing me to just say “No.”
been working through, knowing God is faithful and good forever.
There may be times when, no matter what the tradition has been, or what a family member expects or thinks about it, that you must say “No” to them. 38 gemwoman.net
the LORD! The Holy Spirit, Who is the Spirit of
years before, we had become quite
Thank the LORD that, when Jesus went
accustomed to having the house to
Although the devil and my mind was
to Heaven to be with the Father until
ourselves and I had created a prayer
trying to tell me I was being selfish, I
His return, He sent the Counselor, the
room in my office, where I had things
could not get peace about saying “Yes”
Comforter, the Helper (John 14:26) to
that were just between me and the LORD.
to her.
us!
This time, I knew that, for many
I had learned through the years to
So I decided to obey the LORD and
reasons I won’t go into, I did not need
overcome other humans’ opinions
expressed that to my husband,
to have the spiritual atmosphere
and go with the One Who loves me and
reminding him of other times when
interrupted by having a person in my
knows my life from the beginning till
we had had to say “no”—even to our
gemwoman.net 39
GREY AREAS
GREY AREAS
daughter—and that it was all right. It
We had both grown spiritually since
Unfortunately, as I expected, she
had been hard at the time, but it was
Christmas, and as I expected him to
bemoaned the fact that, since she was
the right thing to do. Even our daughter
(trusting God ultimately to guide my
flying, she could not afford a hotel.
had later admitted the wisdom of our
husband’s heart), he honored that
The event was only one day. She had
decision, and decided to respect it,
request.
decided, without consulting us, that
which is when the relationship was reconnected.
she would stay three days. I told him a few things that would test the relative’s maturity to see how
Anyway, she was offended and decided
Even if others did not understand, I
she would respond, knowing that
not to come.
told my husband, and judged us, they
she would most likely be offended. I
were not responsible to the LORD for
don’t like to offend others, but when it
As I also told my husband, if she truly
LORD, my Greatly Beloved Jesus Christ,
our decisions—but we are.
comes down to it, if they are offended,
wanted to come to this event, she
Who saved, delivered, and healed me
it is because they choose to be.
would make a way—as she had made
(John 3:15-17), and continues to bless
a way to travel the world for years and
my life more every day!
After all, I also told him, if we did not
my private time and place with my
allow demons or other unwelcome
So I asked my husband to tell her that
even living in foreign countries in the
guests to stay in our home, why would
we would be happy to take her to the
bush.
we allow this?
event, but that she needed to get a
Ask the LORD for wisdom and courage to say “No” when you need to. He knows all things, and always has the best Plan for you. He always has your back!
I will also continue to guard and enjoy
Ask the LORD for wisdom and courage to say “No” when you need to. He
hotel for however long she wanted to
I find no fault in her and pray this
knows all things, and always has the
stay in town.
lesson will help her understand to be
best Plan for you. He always has your
more considerate of others. Only the
back! gw
She was first offended because he
LORD can help her with that. Tonja K. Taylor is the author of many
discussed the matter with me, his bride, instead of just telling her
Meanwhile, I have and continue to
works, including THE ADVENTURES OF
“yes,” as he had at Christmas. She
have peace, knowing that, for many
PRINCESS PEARL, P.O.W.E.R.* Girl! series.
had not wanted me to be privy to the
reasons, I was supposed to say,
She and her husband Clayton minister
conversation. But as any good husband
“NO.” This test has strengthened
the Word through teaching, preaching,
should, he not only showed me her
our marriage too. Unity, trust, and
and the arts, through River Rain Creative
emails and his replies, but told her
openness is vital in marriage, and
Arts on You Tube, God Tube), their church,
that as Covenant marriage partners,
I pray this lesson will also help her
and beyond.
we discussed everything.
strengthen her own marriage. Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.com
40 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 41
ETIQUETTE
ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATION
Etiquette Taiwo Katherine Isijola
C
ommunication Etiquette is the art of effective and competent communication.
2
4
Concise: Keep discussions short, sensible and impactful.
Lengthy communication sometimes
Confidence: Keep the tone of your communication warm,
positive and enthusiastic. It creates
This is an essential skill for building
Here are some useful tips for improving
leads to miscommunication and
a very commendable and attractive
personal and business relationships.
communication etiquette:
misunderstanding. Stay on the end
perception to your recipients.
It is a fundamental asset that should be consistently and intentionally developed for personal success and excellence.
1
Courtesy: It is important to remain polite and respectful when
communicating at all levels. The use of offensive, unhealthy language and comments should be avoided. Keep it
goal
3
Clarity:
We must encourage and advocate for Communication
should be clear. Written and
communication etiquette at all levels in the society.
Verbal communication must be
The manner in which we communicate
Polite and Professional. It will earn you
understandable and coherent for
This is an essential fabric for
or interact speaks volumes: It can
credibility.
maximum benefit. We must check
promoting a harmonious and positive
either reflect positively or poorly on
for spelling mistakes and reduce
business, political, personal and social
oneself.
ambiguity. Make it Simple and Clear
life. It’s time to start communicating right. gw
42 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 43
COVER INTERVIEW
“
Nation building is a collective effort and young people must begin to identify the best amongst them and groom each other for leadership.
COVER INTERVIEW
MORAYO AFOLABI-BROWN
Host of Your View, The number one breakfast chat show in Nigeria
Interview by Bolanle Olawale
M
orayo is the friend we all wish we had in our corner. She is the host of the number
1 breakfast TV show in Nigeria, Your View. An inspiration to many women and men alike. Her authenticity is refreshing and appealing as she is never afraid to speak her mind and to go where many people will not dare to tread. Although she has had her own fair share of trials, she is still open about her faith in God. She is not deterred by naysayers and is hopeful about the future and the role the youth are to play in the birth of a new Nigeria. A true conversationalist, interviewing Morayo was like chatting with an old friend, I’m sure you’ll feel the same way reading through the interview as she speaks on her faith, family, and the importance of remaining hopeful.
44 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 45
COVER INTERVIEW
COVER INTERVIEW
How was your life growing up?
New Jersey. I was in a coma for a few
As I remember my childhood, I’m
days, crushed my right femur, lungs
filled with mixed feelings that are
collapsed and had a skull fracture.
indescribable. I attended Corona
Healing and therapy took eight months
primary and secondary school and had
because I had to be in a wheelchair for
a pretty decent childhood. Growing up
a while and I had to get speech lessons.
in a polygamous setting comes with its
It was indeed my “downest” moment.
own unique challenges. Also growing up alone, knowing all my older
How has this moment impacted
brothers had left for school abroad was
you?
rather lonely for me. Although I had my
That experience drew me closer to God.
half sister and brother to interact with
I had to force myself to find purpose,
when I visited them at their house,
knowing that God saved my life for a
that came with its own special drama.
reason. I stopped focusing on myself
Nevertheless, my father sometimes
and paid more attention to society and
noticed my loneliness and would
how I can be more impactful.
engage me in political discussions sometimes. My mom on the other hand
How do you relax?
made sure I did not lack anything.
Before marriage, I used to like watching movies, dining at fancy restaurants,
Describe a defining moment in
and eating new cuisine. After
your life.
marriage,things have changed, I just
My car accident was one of the most
hang out with my kids and husband,
defining moments of my life. I was
not sure I have eaten out at a very fancy
a front passenger driving with my
restaurant since marriage. My “oga”
university boyfriend at the time. It was
doesn’t roll like that. Recently, I have
a jeep wrangler and the rooftop was
begun to watch movies with my kids.
down. He lost control of the vehicle
However, I’m craving for a girls night
and the car flipped. I was later flown
out where we go to dance and do some
with a helicopter to Rutgers University
unusual stuff.
teaching Hospital in New Brunswick,
46 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 47
COVER INTERVIEW
What 4 words best describe you? Leader, selfless, true and kind.
What role does faith play in your everyday life? God is my source. He has been leading me since I can remember. More importantly, I have a prayerful support system that lifts me when I’m
“
COVER INTERVIEW
He is my best friend. I really don’t have a lot of friends and he covers that gap pretty well. We talk about things a lot and we rely and trust each other immensely.
down. I’m very grateful to God for all the people in my life that are holding me up in prayer. Personally, I have a deep indescribable relationship with God.
Tell us about your salvation experience. It happened when I was in Corona Secondary School. I think my classmate, Stephen Obasohan led me to Christ. I can’t remember all the details because my car accident took away some of my memories. I remember I used to be a Moslem and I was fascinated at how Christians dance and are happy during their service. I just knew I had to attend church with them. It was from there that I met with Christ and began my journey.
You are a mother of 4, of which 48 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 49
COVER INTERVIEW
two are a set of twins. What has motherhood taught you? It has taught me patience, love and care. Sometimes, I get quite exhausted from work but as a mother, I simply have to make out time to attend to family no matter how tired I am. It has also taught me sacrifice.
COVER INTERVIEW
“
Don’t speak because others are speaking. We all have different paths. Your time will come.
make do with what we have.
Your father left a huge legacy. Do you feel pressured to live up to those standards? Not many people in my generation know my father, so I don’t feel the pressure with my peer group. However, my father’s generation often
What is the sweetest thing your
remind me of my Dad. Personally, I’m
husband has done for you?
out to make my own mark and not to
He surprised me with the best 40th
live under my dad’s shadow, so no
birthday song, planned a TY Bello
pressure for me.
photoshoot and organized a virtual birthday celebration. I knew he wanted
How do you reconcile career
my birthday to be memorable but I did
a d va n ce m e n t a n d fa m i l y
not know how far he was going to take it.
responsibilities? I am very careful to know where to
Your birthday song, “Morayoo”
draw the line. Career advancement
performed by your husband
is great but if it will get in the way of
to celebrate your 40th birth-
my family, I don’t take it. I have learnt
day was indeed a very romantic
from my mother, mother-inlaw and
touch. What would you say has
other older people around. When
been a helpful tip for keeping the
the chips are down, your family is all
romance alive in your marriage?
you’ve got. So, I won’t trade building
He is my best friend. I really don’t
that relationship for a career that could
have a lot of friends and he covers that
disrupt that. Also, earlier in marriage,
gap pretty well. We talk about things
we made some intentional decisions
a lot and we rely and trust each other
like moving from 1004 apartments to
immensely. I would have loved to say
a duplex in Ketu, so I’m exactly next
we are romantic but we aren’t. We
to my office. It helped in the early days
50 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 51
COVER INTERVIEW
COVER INTERVIEW
Of course. I have gotten in trouble for
Can you please describe the
We party hard. We love our cultural
some careless talk about my husband,
Nigeria of your dreams?
display in fashion, food and music.
Mistakes happen. For me, I believe one
The Nigeria of my dreams is clean,
We are probably the most educated
of the reasons we have a high level of
has lots of fresh air and we can see the
Africans. We are also probably the
moral decadence is that good people
blue skies. We have young innovative
most respectful and resilient.
refuse to talk or share their real life
leaders, creating and building. I
stories. We must stop glossing over
become a real Nigerian, not just a
How should the youth perceive
successes and triumphs. We must
Yoruba woman. The basic social
their roles in nation building?
say it as it happened so people learn.
amenities are provided and there are
This country belongs to them. They
There are good marriages out there but
no worries about electricity or roads.
are the new custodians and must not
the bad stories are prominent. Young
More importantly, there is a full new
be afraid of taking what belongs to
couples who are happily married
orientation of love and care for each
them. Nation building is a collective
should be open about their successes
other.
effort and young people must begin
and challenges so younger people
to identify the best amongst them
see both stories. Let’s not leave the
How can we as Nigerians create
and groom each other for leadership.
narrative to people who have had bad
an enabling environment for the
Nigerians in the diaspora too must
experiences alone.
next generation?
participate. They should lead in
Hands off!! The young people have
resources and strategy.
What would you say to that
shown they can lead and can be very
woman who is yet to find her
organized. Leaders simply need to step
Do you believe having more
voice?
aside. I would like to wake up one day
women occupying strategic lead-
Don’t force it. It will come, when the
and be told every single leader above
ership roles in politics will help
time arises. Don’t speak because
60 years has put in their resignation
move Nigeria forward?
of building our relationship. We had
others are speaking. We all have
to every political office and they’ll
Well, I think so. Women see things
enough afterwork activities that built
different paths. Your time will come.
be handing over in 3 months. Young
verify differently from men and
our friendship.
Before then, know yourself, get
people will have 3 months to take over
I strongly believe the season we
acquainted with your unique message
the helms.
have found ourselves calls for a re-
You unashamedly express your
and prepare. When your time to speak
views, which has endeared you
comes, it will be divine and you’ll know
What are 5 things you think
Recently, my husband bought a
to many people. Has this attribute
it. At that point. Not even you can stop
Nigerians do better than anyone
well-known branded extension box
ever gotten you in trouble?
you from speaking.
else?
because he expected it to be efficient,
52 gemwoman.net
strategizing and a recalibrating.
gemwoman.net 53
COVER INTERVIEW
“
Women see things differently from men and I strongly believe the season we have found ourselves calls for a re-strategizing and a recalibrating.
COVER INTERVIEW
I was a social media protester. I was pretty
We’ve all watched nervously as
Who would you say are your
consistent online with my messages on
the hoodlums invaded TVC and we
“dream guests” that you would
FB, Twitter and IG. I completely identified
were unsure of what the outcome
love to have on your show?
with the guys on the streets and I felt the
would be. Would you care to share
Every TV presenter would like to
pulse of every Nigerian. If I were not a tv
on what took place that day?
interview Oprah. However, locally, I’ll
presenter, I would definitely have been
On that day, we figured something
be honored to interview Mrs. Ibukun
on the streets.
could happen but we did not envisage
Awosika, Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala-
the enormity. So, that day when TVC
Iweala and President Buhari. Oh, how
What do you hope this protest
got attacked, we were in the studio,
I have so many questions for Buhari.
will birth in Nigeria?
and had no idea what was happening.
It has birthed a new political
Eventually, we got out and some
Words of advice for aspiring
consciousness in the minds of young
hoodlums still attacked us, smacked
media personnel
people. Politics used to be somewhat
my face twice and took my phone. It
Media personalities have a lot to do
considering the brand. I saw the
far fetched but after the protests,
was quite a traumatic experience for
in the new Nigeria. They are the real
brand without opening the box and
it has almost become tangible and
me but I’m grateful that we got out
influencers. Many journalists and
I also concurred it was a good choice
achievable. They have tasted a
alive
media houses are being demonized
for our house. My husband then gave
semblance of power and authority and
out the extension box to his mother.
it is left for them to build on it or throw
What does the future look like
which many believe are unsympathetic
Sadly, I decided to get a replacement
it all away.
for your breakfast chat show;
to the plights of Nigeirans. In view of
Your view?
this, media personalities have been
for our house. When I got to the store
as a result of their various platforms,
to buy the same brand, I surprisingly
What excites you most about the
Your View has come of age. It’s beyond
able to earn the trust and respect of
realized that the exact brand wouldn’t
future?
the ladies and I. It’s a platform created
their followers. They are now the
have worked in our house because we
It’s hard to say. Recently, there is a
for women to continually have a voice.
real influencers. The younger ones
have a toddler. Women consider all
frequent family discussion on possible
So, with or without any of us, YourView
must understand the enormous task
the important factors before making
relocation but in that conversation,
is the voice of Nigerian women. So the
ahead and must be ready to take
a decision. We need more of us to be in
there is still resistance within us. We
future of the show will be in the hands
responsibility for every action and
political leadership
are hopeful that things will get better.
of those who’ll be anchoring in future.
utterance. gw
2023 elections will give a better insight
For now, we’ll continue to do our job
Can you please describe your
to what the future holds. Until then, let
the best we can.
experience during the #endsars
me hold on to hope and not veer off to
protest?
excitement.
54 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 55
END S AR S F E AT URE
LESSONS FROM THE ENDSARS PROTEST: Friends in Disguise
T
Lamide Adeleye
(Photo by PIUS UTOMI EKPEI / AFP)
ruly, a rich man amid hungry men isn’t a rich man after all; this is just one of the copious lessons learnt during the COVID 19 lockdown and the just ended ENDSARS protest in Lagos, Nigeria. →
gemwoman.net 57
END S AR S F E AT URE
During the recent lockdown imposed
the menial jobs; drivers, house maids,
meaningless deaths and unfair arrests.
in Lagos, sometimes in March, as
artisans etc And oh! They are a huge
It started well and the organizers were
a measure in curbing the spread of
number! A lot of them are jobless, some
eulogized until hoodlums and looters
the coronavirus, many families who
are graduates and many left farming
took advantage of the situation and we
could afford it started stocking up on
in their villages in pursuit of greener
were no longer safe on the streets and
groceries and toiletries. I reside in one
pastures in Lagos and are too ashamed
even in our houses. The hoodlums were
of the gated and well secured high-
to return home to their villages.
now in charge. Police had abdicated
brow estates in the Lekki axis and I
Photo - https://nairametrics.com/
END S AR S F E AT URE
and overtake and recover all.
their civic duties and fled the streets.
could see several instructions flying
It is inevitable that after only a few
across the social media platforms
days, with no daily income, things
Businesses, shops and malls were
journey, give us speed and ensure
encouraging folks to stock up.
will get tough for them and they will
mercilessly looted. It was complete
victory. The Lord never wants us to
become hungry and angry. Besides
mayhem and chaos. A quagmire we
ignore the poor around us. As you go
“Stock up”? What happens to the so
that, shouldn’t we care for them?
never imagined possible. Even private
up the ladder of success, progress,
many folks at the lower end of the
Aren’t they our neighbors?
residential estates were not spared in
promotion, who can you help along
the attack.
the way? It’s very crucial that even
socio-economic hierarchy around us
Certain things will help us in our
whose survival is solely dependent
With these thoughts in mind; I quickly
on their daily earnings? I asked my
sent a message to those I thought could
My estate was almost attacked but our
insecurity, that seed of greatness in us
husband, who could not agree less.
get my message across directly to the
saving grace were the hoodlums in our
can still be a blessing to those around
Even though the estate is gated and
officials of the Resident Association
neighborhood we had fed during the
us.
well-secured, the neighborhood has
and almost immediately, plans were
March lockdown; the Egyptians we
a number of communities whose
being made to raise funds to purchase
didn’t ignore several months earlier
Rise up and as you do, don’t forget to
residents are on a much lower
food items for these people. However,
when they were hungry. They fended
help those you meet on the way. Who
economic class, people living below
the Estate management decided to act
off the hoodlums on our behalf and
knows? That may be where your next
the poverty line in the Lekki axis; they
and sort these people out by giving
insisted they were the ones protecting
promotion comes from.
are the ones majorly employed to do all
some donations to the community on
the Estate. It would have been a most
behalf of the residents, from their own
horrible and catastrophic experience!!
My estate was almost attacked but our saving grace were the
in our own low seasons or seasons of
coffers. That season ended peacefully.
Don’t ignore that Egyptian around you anymore. Reach out and help the less
The same Egyptian David chose not to
privileged today without expecting
hoodlums in our neighborhood
Then the month of October ushered in
neglect in 1 Samuel 30:6-18 became his
to receive from them in return.
we had fed during the March
the ENDSARS protest; a protest against
saving grace, even though he already
Remember, a rich man amid poor
lockdown
police brutality in Nigeria, leading to
had an instruction from God to pursue
people, isn’t rich after all. gw
58 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 59
ISSUES OF THE HEART
The Woman and Her Changing Relationships
ISSUES OF THE HEART
W
omen are natural
go through various seasons.
support enablers (Ps 144:12). We provide the
Having established this background,
underpinning structures for stability
what does it mean for a woman?
and productivity. Simply put, we are
1
wired to give of ourselves, to solve problems, to hold others up and to ensure sustainability.
Dayo Oluwasanmi
Know the season. Because relationships are, at the very least, bi-directional, sometimes
the change is taking place in the life of
As support providers and enablers, we
the other party (be it children, parent,
must be conscious that the pillars of
husband or friends). In what season
structure – as immovable as they are,
of life are they? You need to adapt to
don’t take the shine forever. As soon
that change – whether that means
as the structure is erect and solid, the
being less intrusive, stepping back or
focus shifts from the pillars to other
holding your peace. What change do
items/components in the house. Our
you need to make?
role of support goes through dynamic
peer, we must be open to inevitable
2
change.
many of us start off as though it were
changes as we grow. Whether as mother to child, wife to husband, mentor to mentee, or even peer to
Know the season of life you are in. The journey of life is run as a marathon and we are not
in control of the finish line. Yet, too a sprint. We put all our energies into
60 gemwoman.net
Life is lived in seasons whether
getting things done. We sweat small
measured by the process of planning,
stuff. We care so much for others. We
planting and harvesting as farmers
make tremendous sacrifices and we
do; or by the weather through spring,
get disillusioned because we forget
summer, autumn and winter. As
that a different strategy is required
mortals we live through the process of
for running a marathon without
birth, growth, maturity and death. Just
crashing along the way. If you have
like life, the dynamics in relationships
given up so much, perhaps now is the
gemwoman.net 61
ISSUES OF THE HEART
Do not be afraid to embrace a new you. As we evolve so do our relationships change.
time for some reflection and self-
matters begins to broaden. We know in
love. Take some time out for yourself
part and so we learn every day. There is
and consider some of the ‘almost
more to you. Expect change. Embrace
forgotten’ dreams. There is never a
change.
better time to consider ‘YOU’
3
To everything under the sun, there is a
Do not be afraid to embrace a
time. A time to love others and a time
new you. As we evolve so do our
to self-love. A time to nurture others
relationships change. Change
and a time to be nurtured. A time to
is certain as long as we live, and this
give and a time to take.
is why we must continually be open to a reframing and repositioning of our mindset. As you grow older, you will notice that your position on some
62 gemwoman.net
Know the time and enjoy the season. gw
BSS
BSS
B
ody Soul and Spirit (BSS) is an annual women’s event, pioneered in 2007 by gemWoman Magazine with the vision of creating an exclusive day of timeout for women to network, get empowered and be inspired for greatness, rejuvenation and destiny fulfillment; through inspiring praise, worship, word ministrations, prayer sessions, special ministrations and various interactive sessions. This life-changing event affords women an opportunity to take time out to receive inspiration, hope, strength, and a mindset shift. They are encouraged to remain focused on Christ and gain the insights needed to live and maximize their full potentials.
zz
October 1st 2014 [Shine]
zz
October 1st 2015 [A New Song]
zz
October 1st 2016 [Radiance]
zz
October 2nd 2017 [Greater-Heights]
zz
October 1st 2018 [Limitless]
zz
October 1st 2019 [More Of You]
zz
October 3rd 2020 [Sound of abundance of rain (SOAR)]
BSS has over the years, enjoyed sponsorship from companies such as MTN, Nestle, Nigerian Bottling Company, GlaxosmithKline, Ragolis, May and Baker, PZ Cussons, Venivici Spa, Maggi, Coca Cola, FCMB, Standard
BSS GLOBAL 2020 was simultaneously
Chartered Bank, Chi foods, Unilevers,
streamed and translated in Spanish to
Access Bank, Stanbic IBTC etc.
the women who joined from eleven major cities across three continents.
This year due to the pandemic Body
It was indeed a time of refreshing, rededication and reawakening
The ambience of BSS is such that
Ibadan, Dallas, TX, Atlanta, Georgia,
Soul and Spirit was held on the 3rd of
breeds openness and togetherness and
London, Uk, Panama, Nicaragua,
October virtually, rather than being
the main objective of BSS is to ensure
Costa-Rica
held in various cities. All the cities
For more details you can watch
came together to have one event
highlights on the various platforms
that women achieve and live a life of passion, purpose and fulfilment.
zz
October 1st 2007 [Body Soul &Spirit]
tagged: (BSS GLOBAL – 2020) with the
zz
October 1st 2008 [Alabaster Box]
theme, “Sound of Abundance of Rain
The journey of BSS started 14 years
zz
October 1st 2009 [Beauty for Ashes]
(SOAR)”, featuring various seasoned
ago with about 200 women in
zz
October 1st 2010 [Walking by grace]
speakers namely; BImbo Fola-Alade,
attendance and has grown over the
zz
October 1st 2011 [Unfolding his
Bukola Salami, Adeyanju Olomola, Pilar
Glory]
Alvarado, Bukola Bekes, and Bolanle Olawale ( Convener)
years in attendance as well as to being held in various cities around the
zz
October 1st 2012 [Fruitfulness]
world. It is now being held in Lagos,
zz
October 1st 2013 [No Limits]
64 gemwoman.net
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/ UCr2FWs63VQqzXMGXZEWLYQw/videos https://www.facebook.com/Gemmagazines/ Instagram www.instagram.com/gemmagazines Email: bsswomenconference@gmail.com
gemwoman.net 65
BSS GLOBAL 2020
BSS GLOBAL 2020 ABEOKUTA
ABEOKUTA
66 gemwoman.net
ATLANTA
LAGOS 3
gemwoman.net 67
BSS GLOBAL 2020
BSS GLOBAL 2020
DALLAS LAGOS 1
LAGOS 2
68 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 69
END S AR S F E AT URE
END S AR S F E AT URE
#ENDSARS Nigerians in the Diaspora speak out
Y
Toluwalase Olawale
Tomi Favored Alesh is, a Licensed Vocational Nurse, who lives in Houston, Texas
What prompted you to get involved
info as possible to keep it trending.
in th e #En dSars Movem ent? (Especially as a Christian) -
oung Nigerians in their thousands took to the streets, for nearly
I’ve messaged and reached out to perceived influential figures such as
two weeks blocking major roads across cities in Nigeria. They
The Bible tells us in Isaiah 1:17 to
the U.S president & the international
carried placards that stated what their grievance was and their
learn to do good; to seek justice,
criminal court via their public profiles
demands were simple “ENDSARS” This Movement that galvanised
correct oppression, bring justice to
in hopes that they’ll hold Nigeria’s
youths from around the world, became known as the #ENDSARS”
the fatherless, and plead the widows’
leaders accountable.
movement. The Special Anti Robbery Squad or SARS had become a
cause. To hear of the levels of gross
notorious police unit that killed innocent people at will. The pain in the faces of the youth as they chanted in the Yoruba language “Soro soke ” which means “speak up” was visible for all to see. The stories of police brutality were chilling and the videos were sometimes unbearable to watch. The youth demanded reform at every level of policing. The movement was not restricted to Nigeria alone. Nigerian youths in the diaspora took to the streets, marched to parliaments, embassies, organized prayer walks and made their voices heard on social media platforms and on all forms of media.
injustice and police brutality that
My husband and I have attended
were occurring was a literal pain in
protests, and I made a video with
my heart. I also know people who
images from the protests to my
have been affected by the meanness of
spontaneous song “Ignite” to give a
SARS. So when the peaceful protests
visual to the pain.
began, it was not a hard decision to make. I knew I needed to add my voice to the voices speaking out against the evils being propagated. In what ways did you support
One of the unusual aspects of the protests was that it knew no gender,
the movement, and Why did you
ethnicity, age, status or location; religious affinity was also not a barrier.
choose to support it?
Everyone wanted to see a change and took to the streets regardless of their location.
I prayed, wrote posts, prayed
We decide to interview a few women in the diaspora who actively
information regarding the movement
collectively with others, shared
participated in the protest to find out why they decided it was time to
on all of my social media pages,
“Soro soke”
retweeted the hashtags with as much
70 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 71
END S AR S F E AT URE
END S AR S F E AT URE
I honestly hope the little I did would add to what many other people are doing so the awareness continues like an avalanche.
Anita Adefuye a public servant living in Regina, SK
What prompted you to get involved in th e #En dSars Movem ent? (Especially as a Christian) I have always had a passion for Nigeria and want to see the country live up to its full potential. The #endsars movement was the first of its kind on such a large scale where young people stood up to the powers that be, demanding justice. And as a Christian, I know God is a Just God and I do believe that any movement that speaks to justice, Christians should be at the
What did you hope your support
forefront. I mean if we are not, who
would achieve?
else will be? Well, first, involving my kids was a In what ways did you support
way helping them understand the
the movement, and Why did you
need to always stand for justice and
choose to support it?
speak for their rights. While I am not
I chose these ways because in my own
add to what many other people are
little way I believe they will add to
doing so the awareness continues
I shared posts that would help increase
getting involved, I hoped overall, the
bringing awareness to the issue.
like an avalanche. I hope the topic’s
awareness, I attended the protest
movement will send a strong signal
trend continues unabated, and that
in Regina with my kids. I engaged in
to our political leaders that we are
What did you hope your support
corrupt leaders are held accountable
social media discourse regarding it
not a dumb generation incapable of
would achieve?
or prosecuted for their evils by the
and educated people around me when
standing up for our rights. The idea of
international court. gw
there was misunderstanding on the
silence and suffering has to come to an
purpose of the movement
end in our nation on so many levels. gw
I honestly hope the little I did would
72 gemwoman.net
sure of what personal hopes I had
gemwoman.net 73
END S AR S F E AT URE
Temitope Omoyefa is an Identity Administrator living in Regina, SK
and it was clear to see that the youths were being deprived of their basic human rights. Although I could only empathize and pray, I also know that my prayers without work to back that faith is dead. So I decided to get involved in the best way possible right now. In what ways did you support the movement, and Why did you choose to support it? I supported the movement by speaking out on all my social media platforms, In Isaiah 1: 17 (part a) it says “Learn
had prayers with my friends and
to do right; seek justice. Defend the
youths from my church, went for the
oppressed”
organized walk/rally that was held in my city and also educated as many
As a child of God, my belief is that
people as I could; both old and young.
being complicit in the face of injustice is just as bad as those perpetuating
What did you hope your support
this criminal act. I have read and
would achieve?
heard of numerous stories of the atrocities committed by the SARS unit
I hope my support will help amplify
and how it has affected families. The
the voices of the youths in Nigeria to
manipulation and impunity of the
bring about a much needed change for
Nigerian government was appalling
everyone. gw
74 gemwoman.net
END S AR S F E AT URE
END S AR S F E AT URE
Joy Chizoba Chianu a Chemical Engineer from Toronto, Canada
What prompted you to get involved
in the mouth by a police officer. All these
in th e #En dSars Movem ent?
compelled me to join the movement. I
(Especially as a Christian)
felt it was time for me to take a stand for what was right and to speak up.
The drivers for me to get involved in the #EndSars Movement boils down to
In what ways did you support
being tired of accepting the injustices
the movement, and Why did you
inflicted on Nigerians as the status quo.
choose to support it?
I got tired and fed up of the narrative, “This is Nigeria. Nothing can ever
I supported the movement in three
Lastly, I supported the movement
change.” There were several videos and
ways: Sensitize people raising
financially in my own little way through
victims’ accounts circulating online
awareness, Protesting and Donating.
donating to trusted organisations. I
that revealed to us a lot of atrocities
saw the value organisations like The
that the police units and the task force
In the early days of the movement, as
Feminist Coalition were bringing to
SARS had perpetrated. One that was
a Nigerian in Diaspora who was very
the table and it only felt right to support
particularly touching to me was of Joy
active on “Nigerian Twitter”, what was
them within my capacity.
Eze, a young lady who was literally shot
clear to me was the disconnect between the diaspora and Nigerians in Nigeria,
What did you hope your support
where the movement emanated from.
would achieve?
It felt as though not many people in my
76 gemwoman.net
immediate circle were aware of what
I saw the movement as a catalyst for
was going on. This prompted me to
change. I hoped that as Nigerian Youths,
support the movement by sharing the
we would be able to effect change across
information I was receiving far and
various dysfunctional systems in
wide.
Nigeria starting with the Police Force.
I hoped that through my support and advocacy for the movement, I would re-ignite the interest of my fellow Nigerians who have come to have a resigned view of what they expect from our leaders.
I also saw it as an opportunity for us to
like tribe, religion and socioeconomic
I also went to the peaceful protest that
come together in our fight for a better
status that have been historically used
was held in Toronto.
country, irrespective of differences
to pit us against each other. gw
gemwoman.net 77
END S AR S F E AT URE
END S AR S F E AT URE
Olawunmi Idowu Founder & Director of Woezo Africa Music & Dance Theatre Inc. Lives in Calgary, Alberta
What prompted you to get involved
Youths who want a transformation and
in th e #En dSars Movem ent?
a rebirth of the Nation. We created an
(Especially as a Christian)
Instagram handle (@endsarsyyc) to keep supporters engaged, raised funds
I actually had my own frightening encounters with the Nigerian police when I traveled to Lagos for my grandfather’s funeral in 2007. The
I knew I could not sit at home in distress knowing that I did nothing to represent my brothers and sisters and protest against their habitual mistreatment.
Nigerian police motto has been “Police is your Friend” but the unit has been implicated in widespread human rights abuses, extrajudicial killings, torture, arbitrary arrests, unlawful detention and extortion. I am utterly disappointed at our unconscious Nigerian leaders who used the military
to purchase items such as: food/
brand and platform and signed several
to forcefully intimidate and disrupt
beverages, banner, megaphones,
online petitions.
the peaceful protesters in Lagos. They
etc. and we also organized a
had shown no regards to human rights
protest and candlelight vigil in
What did you hope your support
or lives.
a show of solidarity which was
would achieve?
heavily publicized by the National In what ways did you support
news agencies (CBC and CTV).
I was mentally and emotionally
the movement and, Why did you
I supported the movement by
drained due to the severity of the issues
choose to support it?
coordinating the media coverage,
going on in Nigeria. I knew I could not
made placards for the protesters,
sit at home in distress knowing that I
This is an historic moment. I am a
conducted radio, television and
did nothing to represent my brothers
member of endsarsyyc in Calgary,
newspaper interviews, broadened
and sisters and protest against their
Alberta. We are a collective of Nigerian
the awareness through my own
habitual mistreatment. gw
78 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 79
TESTIMONY
TESTIMONY
God Still Answers Prayers
me of God’s silence during this time
ready to end the call and bubbling in
and doubt began to set in as my faith
the new joy I suddenly felt in my heart
wavered. I found myself lost in the
after the prayers. Unknown to me, the
tunnel of my own thoughts and all I
sister’s husband had been listening
could see was deep darkness all around
to our conversation and prayers, he
me. I suddenly knew that this wasn’t
told her to ask me to send my account
just about the situation, it was a test
details. I did and within the twinkling
of my faith. I knew I needed prayers
of an eye, money was sent to my
ndeed the clouds were very dark over
to stand strong. Somewhere, in my
account that covered all the issues
my life, this time I was definitely
subconscious I knew I had to be strong.
and debts. I even had some leftovers
convinced that I had said enough
I finally decided to send an anonymous
to start my side business. It was like
prayers, yet it looked like God still
prayer request through one of our
a dream! My heart leapt in gratitude
turned a deaf ear. How long will this
selected leaders in the gem group. I
and praise to God. So God had not been
continue? I wondered. I am a woman
stated my prayer point and described
silent all along. He was working behind
of faith and try to live by faith but
the thoughts I had been battling with.
the scene and at the appropriate time
this time it looks like my faith was
I was so ashamed of my situation and
He showed up. I am not ashamed to
not working. All manners of thoughts
did not want to be identified.
declare that God came through for me.
Upon receiving my text the sister
Please be encouraged, no matter what
called me immediately. I was greatly
you are going through The tunnels
Omowunmi Seriki
I
kept running through my mind and
‘ve given...that response came back to
finally, on that fateful day, I thought
me and helped bring me back to reality.
to myself, “wouldn’t it be great if my life just ended”?. I couldn’t seem to
I was too ashamed to even ask for help,
encouraged by her words of wisdom
and dark clouds of thoughts are just a
see a way out of my predicament. I
and even if I wanted to ask, who would
and counsel. I was reminded of God’s
deceit of the devil to keep you out from
looked at the bug powder my landlady
I ask from? It looked like everyone
faithfulness and all of a sudden, the
being reached by God. Take it from
had given me to use on the insects
I knew pretty much had their own
dark cloud of thoughts rolled away.
someone who has experienced the
plaguing my kitchen. “I could just mix
issues to deal with and I was heavily
During the prayers, I received hope
faithfulness of God.
that up in water and close my eyes
in debt. Enormous responsibilities
and faith in my heart. I felt renewed in
in death”. I didn’t know I had said it
were staring me in the eye. I couldn’t
faith,and in fact.
out loud, my second daughter’s voice
cut corners and compromise my
killed the thought when I heard her say
relationship with God, although to
I told her there was no need for the
“mummy you would land in hell fire”.
be truthful, I thought of it at times.
prayer points to be sent to the group
You are just one step closer to your
Talking about getting back what you
Daily, the devil never failed to remind
anymore. She was happy and I was
miracle! gw
80 gemwoman.net
God is right there in the situation with you. Don’t give up on God.
gemwoman.net 81
KAN D I D TAL K S
KAN D I D TAL K S
ABC steps in Achieving
Executive Presence Kehinde Adollo
T
o put it in simple terms, executive presence is how we show up every day. It’s our ability to inspire confidence, trust, and let others know you are dependable, reliable and capable.
Here are the ABC steps to attaining
zz
Executive steps
Behaviour: Does your behavior convey negative or positive energy, do you inspire and influence others
zz
Appearance: Did you know that it
with your character? It’s important
takes less than 3 seconds to make
that you carry confidence without
an impression? It is said that the
being arrogant, assertive without
way you dress is how you will be
being averse, humility yet not timid,
addressed.
these are all good behavioral traits.
The way we look, and package
zz
Communication:
your
ourselves even before uttering a single
communication must also display
word says a lot about you.
strength even in the midst of challenges, ensure you do not
It can be sometimes described as
communicate as being rude or
charisma or the ability to own a room.
aggressive. Communicate with clarity, let it always be seasoned
As 2021 , beckons what will be your
with grace .
differentiation strategy amongst your friends, contemporaries, and
Executive presence is a required and
stakeholders.
essential asset for every career woman or entrepreneur.
It is simply called “Executive Presence” this comprises your
It is important to take into cognizance
carriage, composure, confidence,
the way you show up at all times.
courage, and care. All these combined comes to play Executive
presence
brings
opportunities, and helps us climb the corporate and business ladder of success .
82 gemwoman.net
It is important to take into cognizance the way you show up at all times.
Remember your “presence” can either make you or break you. God bless you. gw
gemwoman.net 83
HUMOUR
Rest In Peace
O
ne Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The plaque was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either side of it. The seven year-old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside him and said quietly, “Good morning, Alex.” Good morning, Pastor,” replied the young man, still focused on the plaque. “Pastor Phillips, what is this?” Alex asked. “Well, son, it’s a memorial to all the men and women who have died in the service.” Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque. Little Alex’s voice was barely audible when he finally managed to ask, “Which one, the 9:00 or 10:30 service?”
Tale of two Pastors
T
wo Pastors wives were visiting and sewing their husband’s pants. One wife said: My husband is just beside himself, he does not know what to do anymore and he is so tired and depressed he said he is ready to just give up and resign.
The other wife said: I am sorry to hear that because my husband has never been happier. Our membership is growing and we are out of our financial burden, we have such a large and loving congregation. Life could not be any better than it is right now. One woman was mending the seat of her husband’s trousers, the other was mending the knees. Prayerful people are victorious people.
Forgiving Others
T
he preacher’s Sunday sermon was Forgive Your Enemies. Toward the end of the service, He asked his congregation, “how many of you have forgiven their enemies”?
About half held up their hands. He then repeated his question. As it was past lunchtime, this time about 80 percent held up their hands. He then repeated his question again. All responded, except one small elderly lady. “Mrs. Jones?” inquired the preacher, Are you not willing to forgive your enemies? “I don’t have any.” she replied. smiling sweetly. “Mrs. Jones, That is very unusual. How old are you?” “Ninety-three,” she replied. “Oh Mrs. Jones, what a blessing and a lesson to us all you are. Would you please come down in front of this congregation and tell us all how a person can live ninety-three years and not have an enemy in the world.” The little old lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said “I outlived all of them”
84 gemwoman.net
PR AY E R S
PR AY E R S
Prayers for our Nation
• Pray that God’s will would be done in our nation. “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:9-10
• Pray that each of us in our great nation would begin to walk in the love of Christ towards one another as Christ demonstrated for us.
• Pray that you and all believers in the nation would seek God
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
in humility and that God would bring healing to our nation.
proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
“Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves
angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but
and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear
rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land.”
always perseveres. Love never fails.”
2 Chronicles 7:14
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
• Pray that our nation would be able to emerge from its
• Pray that our hearts would love generously and help those
darkness and seek God and be a light to others.
in need in our country.
“See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the peoples,
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility,
but the LORD rises upon you and his glory appears over you. Nations
value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests, but
will come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your dawn.”
each of you to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:3-4
• Thank God that He is the one in full control of our nation
• Pray that God would hear our prayers and move in mighty
and over the hearts of those in authority. “Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.” Romans 13:1
86 gemwoman.net
Image: https://www.freepik.com/wayhomestudio
Isaiah 60:2-3
ways in our nation. “We do not make requests of you because we are righteous, but because of your great mercy. Lord, listen! Lord, forgive! Lord, hear and act! For your sake, my God, do not delay, because your [nation] and your people bear your Name.” Daniel 9:19
gemwoman.net 87
PR AY E R S
• Pray that our hearts will not harbor any anger or bitterness towards those with different political views or religion and show them love and respect. “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32
• Pray that our hearts: from those in power to the citizenry would pursue righteousness rather than sin. “Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin condemns any people.” Proverbs 14:34
• Pray that the fear of the LORD will rule in the nation and godly wisdom would govern the actions of all in the country. “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” Proverbs 9:10
• Pray that God’s will alone would be done in our nation and only the counsel of god shall stand. “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:9-10
88 gemwoman.net
CUISINE
CUISINE
Easy to Make Desserts Seyi Farinu
T
here are 2 types of dessert people. The cake folks and then the pie folks. Which one are you? Personally, I am biased, and I believe nothing is as good as warm pie, especially on a cold day. This pie crust recipe is for real the best if you stick to the instructions in the recipe and maintain the temperature. My trick for this pie crust is to pre grate your butter and freeze it. Trust me, you will be glad you did. Happy baking!
Spiced Apple Galette Ingredients
freeze for at least 20 minutes.
zz
Pie Dough
zz
2 and 1/2 cups or 315g all-purpose
butter together, ensure all the butter
flour
is coated in the flour. Make a well in
zz
1 teaspoon salt
the center and pour in the ½ cup of
zz
1 cup or 240g unsalted butter, chilled
ice-cold water. Using your hand mix
and grated
the mixture together till it comes
1/2 cup or 120ml ice water
together. If dough feels crumbly,
zz
2. Mix salt, flour and chilled grated
transfer to a lightly floured flat
Instructions
surface and form it to one ball. Wrap
1. Using the large section of your
dough and chill in the fridge for at
standard box grater, grate all the
least 30 minutes. gw
butter on a parchment paper and
90 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 91
CUISINE
CUISINE
Fried Yeast Doughnuts
aside to proof for at least 1 hr. 2. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and spray lightly with nonstick cooking spray; set aside. Place the proofed dough on a wellfloured work surface and gently roll into a 12-inch square (about ½-inch thick). Cut the dough into 9 doughnuts using a 3-inch round cutter. Transfer the doughnuts to the prepared baking sheet, cover with a piece of plastic wrap that has been sprayed with non-stick cooking spray, and prep your fryer or a medium pot filled halfway with a neutral oil. 3. The oil in the fryer or pot should be at 350°F before frying donuts. Fry donuts 2 at a time so as not to crowd the fryer and drop the heat.
Ingredients
Instructions
on low speed until the dough comes
Fry donuts for 3-4 minutes or until
1. In a small bowl stir together yeast,
together, about 3 minutes. Add the
golden brown. Toss fried donut in
zz
2½ teaspoons active dry yeast
zz
⅔ cup whole milk (warm)
a pinch of sugar and warm milk. Let
butter, two pieces at a time, mixing
granulated sugar right after frying
zz
3½ cups all-purpose flour
it sit for 2 minutes or till bubbles
after each addition and until butter is
and cool for 5 minutes.
zz
⅓ cup granulated sugar
form. Transfer mixture into the
fully incorporated and dough is soft,
zz
2 teaspoons salt
bowl of an electric mixer fitted with
a total of 5 to 6 minutes. Transfer the
Doughnuts can be enjoyed tossed in
zz
3 eggs
the dough hook attachment and add
dough into a lightly oiled bowl and
sugar or you can fill them with your
zz
110ml of soft butter
the flour, sugar, salt and eggs; mix
wrap tightly with plastic wrap. Set
favourite jam or pastry cream. gw
92 gemwoman.net
gemwoman.net 93
CUISINE
CUISINE
Spiced Apple Filling Ingredients zz
Assembly
5 medium apples (I used granny
1. A galette is a free form pie that
smith apples for the tartness and
doesn’t require a pie pan to bake.
red gala apples for the sweetness)
2. Roll out chilled dough on a lightly
zz
¼ cup brown sugar
floured surface. You would need
zz
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
to roll the dough larger than when
zz
1 teaspoon allspice
you are baking it in a pie pan. I
zz
½ teaspoon ground nutmeg
rolled mine to about a 12-inch
zz
½ teaspoon ground ginger
diameter.
zz
1 tablespoon cornstarch
3. Layer the apple mixture from the
zz
1 tablespoon cold butter
center spreading outwards, leave about 2 inches to crimp and fold
Instructions
the dough.
1. Wash and dry apples with vinegar
4. Fold in the dough edges to seal
to get the wax off. Cut apples into
in the apple mixture. Transfer
1-inch thick slices.
to a baking sheet. Egg wash the
Dark Chocolate Mousse L et’s talk dark chocolate… Our all-time guilty pleasure chucked with loads of antioxidants and brain power nutrients. Chocolate is a very versatile baking ingredient with endless delicious applications. With that being said, I came up with an easy application for chocolate that does not involve baking and only uses one other ingredient.
the chocolate is smooth and melted. Set the bowl aside to cool. 2. Using a hand mixer or whisk whip the remaining cold cream to medium peaks. It’s important that cream remains cold to speed up the
2. T o s s i n t h e s u g a r a n d d r y
sides on the dough. Bake at 350°F
whipping process.
ingredients and set aside for 10
(176°C) for 40 minutes. Cool for 10
minutes.
minutes and serve warm with your
Ingredients
favourite ice cream or whipped
zz
¾ cup 33% whipping cream
spatula. I recommend folding the
cream. gw
zz
½ cup good chocolate (preferably
mixture four times so as not to
55-75%)
deflate the mousse.
3. Fold the whipped cream into the cooled chocolate mixture using a
4. Divide the mixture between 3
94 gemwoman.net
Instructions
ramekins or glasses. Refrigerate at
1. Put all the chocolate chips in a clean
least 1 before serving.
bowl. Heat up ¼ cup cream on the
5. Garnish with whipped cream,
stove or microwave and use it to
chocolate chips or toasted nuts for
melt the chocolate, stirring until all
a crunch. gw
gemwoman.net 95