05/26/17, Vol. 8 Issue 7

PRESENTS:

FOREVER STRONG Orlando’s Journey in Their Own Words Atlanta stands in solidarity with Orlando Panelists include: for this conversation highlighting the Terry DeCarlo, Executive Director, Orlando LGBT Center Rasha Mubarak, Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) Orlando strength of community when united Roxy Santiago, Latin and LGBT Community Leader in love, acceptance, and equality.

Orlando residents directly impacted by JD Casto, Orlando Gay Chorus the Pulse nightclub shooting will share Felipe Sousa Matos-Rodriguez, City of Orlando Mayor’s Office Angel Santiago, Pulse Survivor their unique experiences and their community’s collective healing journey. Sgt. Grace Peek, LGBT Liaison, Orlando Police Department

JUNE 8

2017

8:00 PM – 10:00 PM Rich Theatre @ Woodruff Arts Center 1280 Peachtree ST NE, Atlanta, GA 30309 More info at: www.voicesofnote.org MADE POSSIBLE BY:

PART OF THE NOTEWORTHY VOICES SERIES

GEORGIANEWS

Augusta trans man inspires others to live their truths Urogynecologist weighs in on surgery options, risks

medical community. Taylor said the standard of care is that surgery is acceptable at 18 years old, though some individuals may choose to begin hormone therapy or other non-surgical forms of transition much earlier.

By DALLAS ANNE DUNCAN dduncan@thegavoice.com Rowan Elijah Feldhaus, 25, passed away May 16 following complications from gender confirmation surgery. The Augusta resident made headlines in June 2016 after a local judge denied his name change request, a decision overturned earlier this year by the Court of Appeals of Georgia. But that was just the start of his legacy.

In life, Feldhaus was known for his “grace, quiet dignity, strength and self-assurance,” Lambda Legal Counsel Beth Littrell said in a statement. Now, after a Harry Potter-inspired wand ceremony to celebrate his time on Earth, Feldhaus lives on as both an organ donor and an inspiration to all who want to live their truths.

According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, there was a nearly 20 percent increase in gender confirmation surgeries in just the first year of reporting. In 2016, more than 3,200 surgeries were performed to help transgender individuals.

What’s right for me?

Transgender individuals don’t always elect to undergo surgery as part of their transition, but if they do, there are a number of procedures available to them. Some are more cosmetic, such as body or facial contouring, but others involve creating functional genitalia.

“It’s a grab-bag term, but it involves multiple types of procedures depending on where an individual is in terms of their transition and what they feel helps affirm them and their expression of the gender,” said Dr. Bernard Taylor, a urogynecologist with the Carolinas Healthcare System Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology in Charlotte, North Carolina.

He specializes in “bottom surgery,” which involves surgeries that affirm gender below the belt.

“The women who undergo transgender female surgeries generally have to have their testicles removed, penis removed and then we create a vaginal canal,” Taylor said.

This procedure inverts the skin of the pewww.thegeorgiavoice.com

Gender confirmation surgery includes a number of different procedures, including chest augmentation and genital construction. More than 3,200 such surgeries were performed in 2016. (Photo via iStock)

“[Gender confirmation surgery is] a grab-bag term, but it involves multiple types of procedures depending on where an individual is in terms of their transition and what they feel helps affirm them and their expression of the gender.”

—Dr. Bernard Taylor, urogynecologist with the Carolinas Healthcare System Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology in Charlotte, North Carolina nis and scrotum. It’s a bit of the opposite for trans men, however.

“Many times they’re going to start with a hysterectomy and the removal of the ovaries.

Then that may be all that they want; they want to have their menstrual period stopped.

They want their uterus and ovaries removed,” Taylor said. “If they want to further transition to more masculine genitalia, many times we’ll close off or remove the internal vagina and then reconstruct a small penis they can use to urinate while standing.”

For transgender men who plan to have sex, Taylor said it’s possible to undergo a procedure called a phalloplasty, which constructs a penis that, if desired, can have a prosthesis that allows it to become erect.

Taylor said these surgeries are only performed for individuals with a medical condi-

tion called gender dysphoria, meaning they feel their genitalia must be changed in order to live as their true gender.

“Those individuals who have dysphoria are those who physically look at themselves in the mirror and are really distressed about their bodies not being the gender they were born to be,” Taylor said.

Regardless of what procedures, if any, a transgender individual chooses, there’s lots of preparation and counseling involved.

“The bottom surgeries are permanent.

They’re not reversible. So the patient has to undergo much more thorough counseling and we have to make sure they’re prepared, and their families and their social life,” Taylor said. “We have a consultation about the various types of surgery.”

Age of transition is also a hot topic in the

Be risk-aware Like any procedure, bottom surgeries are surgery, and with them come risks — even some that may seem far-fetched.

“Any surgery, there’s an immediate risk of bleeding, anesthesia, risk of injuring body organs, infection,” Taylor said. “The long-term potential risks or complications that can arise can be chronic problems with bladder dysfunction. If we’re creating a urethra or penis, you can have a fistula, which is a narrowing of the urethra. For a patient undergoing vaginoplasty, they require dilation, and if they don’t dilate regularly, then they could actually have narrowing, tightening or shortening of the vaginal canal internally and it won’t be functional.”

Even a regularly performed surgery can have potential complications. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, there are approximately 600,000 hysterectomies performed each year in the US. However, it was complications related to this procedure that led to Feldhaus’ death.

“Sepsis is an overwhelming infection in the body where bacteria and some of the toxins can be released and they cause organ damage, particularly kidneys, liver, heart and lungs.

That’s what could occur with any surgery, and it has to be identified very early and treated in the hospital,” Taylor said. “Typically it’s pretty rare to have it happen after an elective surgery, but it can occur after any procedure.”

He advised transgender individuals considering surgery to ensure their procedures are done by a board-certified physician who has hospital privileges in case a complication does arise.

“We don’t plan them, but they happen.

When it does happen, you want to make sure your surgeon has privileges and resources so you can be taken care of,” Taylor said.

Unfortunately, there’s not a great resource available listing doctors who perform gender confirmation surgeries. Taylor said patients should ask their doctors how many such procedures they’ve done in the past year to ensure they’re pairing with someone prepared to offer them the best treatment available.

May 26, 2017 News 3

GEORGIANEWS

Two gay candidates in Athens mayoral race Civil rights committee, keeping graduates in city among issues being pushed

By DALLAS ANNE DUNCAN dduncan@thegavoice.com People like to ask Antwon Stephens if Athens, Georgia is ready for a LGBT mayor.

He thinks it is — and he or fellow candidate Richie Knight have good chances at being the first. Both threw their hats in the ring, along with Athens-Clarke County commissioners Harry Sims and Kelly Girtz, for the 2018 election.

Stephens, an Athens native, has a laundry list of things he wants to change in his hometown if elected, and LGBT rights is one of them. He’s also passionate about making Athens a stand-out community on its own, rather than one that sometimes seems more like a suburb of Atlanta, and he wants to change the cycle of students who rent for two or three years and leave the city after graduation.

“That doesn’t benefit the city of Athens but very little,” he said. “We have businesses come in the seasons students are here and then they leave. There are no high-paying jobs. Minimum wage is still very low.”

He favors instituting a property tax incentive to keep graduates in Athens, and is in favor of a fiscally responsible “green” transportation system that provides free public rides.

Though being the first openly gay, first black and youngest mayor are all important qualities to Stephens’ candidacy, it’s not as big a deal to Knight.

“I don’t want to be a first anything. I just want to be a guy that cares about the city,” he said.

Knight, who owns a marketing business, announced his candidacy early this year, in part because he’s focused on listening to fellow Athenians. One major issue citizens raised is youth economic mobility, where students aren’t finishing high school and then find themselves un- or underemployed.

“That contributes directly to our aston-

Athens, Georgia native Antwon Stephens, left, thinks Athens is ready for a LGBT mayor. Both he and fellow openly gay candidate Richie Knight feel they’re up to the task, ready to lead for all residents of Athens-Clarke County. (Courtesy photos)

“If this city is as progressive as it says, and it is 2017, we should be ready for anybody with the right political views to be in that seat, no matter who they are or what they may be.”

— Antwon Stephens, candidate for mayor of Athens-Clarke County ishing poverty rate, which is over 38 percent when you factor in the whole community, and still over 26 percent when you take the college bracket out,” Knight said. “Our transportation is in big need of expansion.

Our buses don’t go to our major industrial parks. We have huge gaps in this greenway project we’ve been working on for 20 years.

Maybe it’s time we think about some public-private partnerships, or private funding, to finish these projects.”

‘A major discrimination problem’ As the mayoral race heats up, the Athens-Clarke government is urged to address the elephant in the room. And they’re not talking about the one that comes with the Crimson Tide to Sanford Stadium every few years.

“We’ve got a major discrimination problem.

It’s been one that we’ve swept under the rug. I think there are enough groups that are making this an issue that people can no

longer ignore,” Knight said. “There’s things happening that we as a city government have to recognize and come up with some sort of penalty on the business side.”

He said it’s almost more of an issue of the commission and mayor “stepping up and doing the right thing” than it is about civil rights.

Stephens called out Mayor Nancy Denson for not supporting the proposals for the committee.

“I have been a vocal supporter of that,” he said. “I believe that should be a steady town hall meeting of people in the city of Athens who are minority Americans, the LGBT community, where they can get together about talking to the commission and to the mayor.”

The push to have a civil rights committee in Athens-Clarke County began in 2016, after the University of Georgia came out with a community study showing there was notable discrimination downtown.

Much of this was on a racial bias: a bar

called General Beauregard’s reportedly had a drink named for a racist slur, and several bars imposed dress codes that seemed to favor non-black patrons.

“We organized a big march on MLK Day, this was in 2016, on City Hall. Hundreds of people came out and at that time we had sat down and discussed, this is the time for us to be pushing for a human relations commission. We had seen other cities push for this,” said Tim Denson, president of Athens for Everyone. “There’s an obvious need here.”

The county commission released a resolution denouncing discrimination, and pro-equality organization Athens for Everyone lobbied to add gender identity.

“It was just a resolution; had absolutely no teeth to it at all. We said the statement is fantastic, but we need a next step, which is to create a body to do what this statement CONTINUES ON PAGE 5

4 News May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

Details

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 4

said,” Denson said. “The mayor and commission at that time were not too open to it.

What they decided to do was pass an ordinance specifically addressing discrimination at bars downtown, when bars were selectively enforcing their dress code.”

Athens equality advocates wanted more.

They felt the ordinance should apply to all businesses, not just bars, and it needed to expand to a full civil rights committee. They marched on City Hall again, at one point even singing “This Little Light of Mine” until the mayor finally gave in and put the proposal on the agenda.

The county chose to move forward with researching the implications of creating such a committee and how it could assist in addressing discrimination, and is expected to bring forward its recommendation to the County Commission and mayor next month, Denson said.

Adding voices to the conversation Denson praised mayoral candidates Girtz and Simms for their leadership on moving the resolution forward, specifically noting Girtz as a “huge ally.”

Register to vote in Athens-Clarke County The mayoral election will take place May 2018. www.mvp.sos.ga.gov

In 2016, the push began for an Athens Civil Rights Committee as part of the Athens-Clarke County Commission. A recommendation from the county staff is expected to be presented in June on whether or not to move forward. (Photo by Richard Chambers, via Wikimedia Commons)

If the committee comes to fruition, it will have several functions, including offering guidance to Athenians who feel they were discriminated against, and potentially plan community awareness events.

“It will kind of do a few different things.

The biggest thing I see is that they will actu-

ally do an annual report on the entire county, including the government and the community as a whole, with how we’re doing on inclusivity … then also possible recommendations on what could be done to make the discrimination go away,” Denson said. “This body would not have legal authority the way some

other human relations commissions have in the past, specifically the one in Atlanta. It would be different in that way, although it’s possible that moving forward, that authority could be given to a body like this.”

Having a diverse slate of people governing Athens-Clarke County could also bolster the functions of the committee, as it may give minority communities the confidence to add their voices to the table.

“Being a part of that community, I have a different viewpoint or different eye than most would have. I recognize and understand our discrimination issue a little more than the average white male because I’ve seen it. I’ve been through it,” Knight said.

“We have to get more citizens engaged in our local government and that’s a community that’s not engaged right now. Very few people in the LGBT community have a voice at the table.”

“

We are doing it because we want to encourage others to get tested for HIV. We need to make sure that our health is a priority in our lives.

— Victor and José “Che Che”

WE’RE

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DOING IT Testing for HIV #DoingIt Testing is Fast, Free, and Confidential cdc.gov/DoingIt www.thegeorgiavoice.com

May 26, 2017 News 5

NEWSBRIEFS Owner of Atlanta gay bar Oscar’s dies at 65 Edward J. Akers, owner of Midtown Atlanta gay bar Oscar’s, passed away on May 10 at the age of 65.

Akers is survived by his partner of 19 years, Chris McDonald, who co-owns the popular Ansley Square bar.

“The Oscar’s family is hurting today.

We have lost one of our own in the early morning hours. Ed has passed on to a better place,” a message posted on the bar’s Facebook page said on the day of Akers’ death, leading to numerous tributes form customers, family and friends.

“A lovely man who lit up the room when he entered,” one read.

“Ed was such a sweet man with a great personality to match,” read another.

“This man never failed to greet me with a hug and a smile,” read another, echoing similar sentiments throughout the thread.

A memorial service was held at the bar on May 20.

Spelman reviews trans task force recommendations In just a few months, transwomen will learn whether or not they will be able to apply to Spelman College. The college’s Board of Trustees is expected to take a vote at the end of this fiscal year, according to a statement issued to Georgia Voice from Spelman’s Office of Communications.

“The Spelman College Transgender Policy Task Force presented its recommendations to the Board of Trustees in late April,” the statement said. “We want to allow the full integrated process to come to a conclusion before commenting further.”

The task force was convened last fall as part of Spelman President Mary Schmidt Campbell’s commitment to expanding the college’s Title IX policies and practices. In a “welcome back” letter she wrote, Schmidt Campbell said it was one of two important such groups she planned to start.

According to the school’s website, the group was tasked with developing a policy recommendation “regarding the consideration of admission eligibility and enrollment of transgender students” at the historically black women’s college.

Task force members include Dean of Students Fran’Cee Brown McClure, interim Provost Myra Burnett, professors, students and alumnae.

At the end of this fiscal year, the Spelman College Board of Trustees is expected to issue a final decision on whether or not transgender students will be allowed admission to the historically black women’s college. (Photo via Facebook)

“The task force’s comprehensive, inclusive and thorough process has thus far included: in-depth analysis of the legal and compliance issues related to Title IX and transgender students; numerous consultations with faculty, students, staff and alumnae groups; detailed reviews of existing policies at other women’s colleges; and examinations of the scholarly research and literature on gender identity,” the school’s statement said.

AID Atlanta files federal suit against CDC over funding Nonprofit AID Atlanta clapped back at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention on May 11, filing a lawsuit after CDC pulled the plug on funding its HIV prevention programs earlier this year.

Nicole Roebuck, executive director for AID Atlanta, said in a news release they were “quite frankly perplexed” by the CDC’s actions.

“AID Atlanta acted as a trusted and highly regarded partner with the CDC under a six-year agreement, operating HIV prevention projects targeting young men of color who have sex with men,” Roebuck said in a news release. “At no time during this period has the CDC expressed any concerns or criticisms of AID Atlanta’s HIV prevention programs or its abilities to manage such programs and federal resources.”

The lawsuit files motions for damages and injunctive relief against the CDC and

wants the court to overturn the agency’s decision to deny its grant awards, according to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. The lawsuit asserts the CDC “mismanaged a critical funding opportunity and impermissibly denied funding to a long-standing partner fighting HIV/AIDS.” Roebuck said the group has been awarded long-term funding for HIV testing, education and prevention at least five times since 2004. According to the AJC, the funding would have allowed AID Atlanta to continue its community-based programs that focus on HIV prevention and testing among black gay and bisexual men ages 18 to 28.

When funding was halted, AID Atlanta immediately stopped its Evolution Project program that aided this target population, and laid off four staff members.

AID Atlanta submitted an application to receive “high impact HIV prevention funds” to replace an existing CDC grant scheduled to end on March 31. The organization was denied renewal of that prevention and testing services contract, the AJC reported.

In the news release, AID Atlanta executives said the CDC “acted in an arbitrary, capricious and illegal manner when it refused to renew” the organization’s funding contract, which “will result in thousands of fewer HIV test being performed in Atlanta and that will only worsen an ongoing public health crisis among minorities in that community.”

6 News May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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Gay Republicans and grudging respect

EDITORIAL

BY PATRICK SAUNDERS psaunders@thegavoice.com

Editor: Patrick Saunders psaunders@thegavoice.com Deputy Editor: Dallas Anne Duncan dduncan@thegavoice.com Editorial Contributors: Ashleigh Atwell, Cliff Bostock, Melissa Carter, Jim Farmer, Shannon Hames, Ryan Lee, Robbie Medwed, Matt Schafer, Dionne N. Walker, Simon Williamson

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Sales Executive: Dixon Taylor dtaylor@thegavoice.com Business Advisor: Lynn Pasqualetti Financial Firm of Record: HLM Financial Group National Advertising: Rivendell Media, 908-232-2021 sales@rivendellmedia.com Publisher Emeritus: Chris Cash

FINE PRINT

All material in Georgia Voice is protected by federal copyright law and may not be reproduced without the written consent of Georgia Voice. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred nor implied.

The appearance of names or pictorial representation does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of that person or persons.

We also do not accept responsibility for claims made by advertisers.

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8 Outspoken May 26, 2017

“The gay Republicans story happened to post to social media the morning after Trump controversially fired FBI Director James Comey, so Georgia Voice readers were extra fired up that day. And they let Kennedy and Anderson have it. Hard.”

It was May 10, the morning after we went to production on our last issue. I was a little groggy-eyed from spending the previous two days with the staff putting the issue together and getting it off to the printer when my phone kept pinging with notifications.

People were leaving Facebook comments left and right on one of the stories we posted.

That story? “Georgia gay Republicans sticking by Trump 100 days in.”

It was a follow-up to a story we did last June giving insight into the minds of LGBT Republicans in Georgia who supported then-Presidential candidate Trump. The two supporters we found, who not only agreed to speak on the record but were eager to, were retired meteorologist Arch Kennedy and University of West Georgia student Avery Anderson. With the follow-up, we wondered, after all that happened in that first 100 days, did they still support Trump?

The short answer was yes. Hell yes.

The story came out in our April 28 issue, and we posted it online on April 26, but we stagger the scheduling of all of our print-to-web stories on social media so they go out into the world over the next two weeks of the print edition’s run.

The gay Republicans story happened to post to social media the morning after Trump controversially fired FBI Director James Comey, so Georgia Voice readers were extra fired up that day. And they let Kennedy and Anderson have it. Hard.

You can visit the thread to get a taste of the reaction. Supporters of the two must have gotten wind of the story and the comments a week later because we then got hit with some people being angry at the people being angry

about Kennedy and Anderson’s views and comments. And so on and so forth.

The uproar reminded me why I’ve always had a curious fascination with, and grudging respect for, gay Republicans, or at least the ones who will speak up about their views.

And I don’t mean the Milo Yiannopouloses of the world – the ones who are clearly just trolling people to get attention and build their brand. I mean the ones who will tell other LGBT people how they feel politically and why, knowing that they’re going to get absolutely ripped apart by most in response.

While I admit to that grudging respect, what I don’t respect is ignorance. Ignorance is dangerous. And that’s what Kennedy displayed in his comments about supporting the Trump administration withdrawing President Obama’s guidance on keeping trans kids safe in public schools.

“If you have man parts, you use the men’s room and locker. If you have female sexual parts, you use the women’s locker room,” he said.

To do otherwise is unfair to the kids, he said.

Yes, the old line about trans people being sexual predators. Which, curiously, had always been the line homophobes used against gay men.

A couple people asked why Kennedy and Anderson were given the spotlight in the first place. The reaction to the story itself answers that. There are many of us that are clearly miles apart in our views, and that deserves to be examined and discussed.

The vitriol was not unexpected, and tapping into that kind of anger and frustration can and often does lead to positive change when managed with intent. But there are also answers to be found when the screaming subsides.

FEEDBACK Re: “In Georgia 6th District election, Ossoff touts LGBT rights views, Handel stays mum,” May 15 “Nothing says ‘I don’t hate gay people anymore’ like refusing to talk to the press.”

-@rjmedwed via Twitter “Of course @karenhandel won’t respond. She won’t even debate.”

-@PAEC2017 via Twitter “I think her responses in the past were more than enough to know where she stands.”

-@irishchickensoup via Twitter Re: “Blue Jays star suspended for gay slur against Atlanta Braves,” May 19 “He should have been banned from SunTrust Park!”

-Jennifer Warrell Crawford via Twitter Re: “Patrick Saunders: Speaking up to save a life,” May 10 “Joan Garner and I, along with many others worked together on the City of Atlanta Domestic Partner benefits issue way back in the day. Joan was an amazing humanitarian, person and advocate for LGBTQ and HIV issues. We in the LGBTQ community need to declare that there be a Joan Garner Day every year, lest we forget her contribution to our struggles. Thanks for the article, Patrick.”

-Lynn Pasqualetti via Facebook Re: “Transgender Georgia man who fought for name change dead at 25,” May 16 “Rowan represents advocacy that everyone can and should admire. He fought for what is right despite his initial reluctance to do so. He needed to and he knew he had to. And he changed the law for every trans Georgian. Thank you, Rowan.”

-Matthew Duncan via Facebook Want to be featured in Feedback? Leave a comment to a story via social media or on our website, or email editor@thegavoice.com with the subject line “Feedback.” www.thegeorgiavoice.com

IN THE MARGINS

By Ashleigh Atwell

Queer TV, movie characters deserve better Ashleigh Atwell is a queer lesbian writer and organizer born and raised in Atlanta, Georgia.

One thing that sucks about becoming socially aware, or “woke” as the kids call it, is an inability to enjoy pop culture like I did in the past. Over the weekend, I watched one of my favorite movies, “Mona Lisa Smile,” for what feels like the millionth time. I’m a sucker for a good chick flick, especially one that has feminist undertones.

For the uninformed, “Mona Lisa Smile” is a film set in the 1950s about professor Katherine Watson, portrayed by Julia Roberts. On the surface, the movie is a beacon of progressiveness, and while I still enjoy the film, there’s one aspect that irritates the hell out of me.

School nurse Amanda Armstrong, portrayed skillfully by Juliet Stevenson, is the

only queer character in the movie and we only know that because another character told Katherine about Amanda’s dead partner.

Amanda starts her brief time on screen as fodder for gossip. Her final scene is tragic, like those of many other queer female characters.

After being fired for providing contraceptives, she tells Katherine that she should have left when her partner died because there was “nothing left to love.” As I watched, I couldn’t help but wish Amanda was given a prequel or at least another scene because I’m sick of queer characters being used as human fast-forward buttons for plots.

I saw the same thing happen a few weeks ago as I binge-watched Netflix’s “Dear

“If a creator wants to throw in a laugh, throw in a flamboyant Black gay man or, in Lionel’s case, an extended masturbation scene. Need some tragedy? Make his daddy beat his ass or throw him in a trash can a la ‘Empire.’”

White People.” One of the characters, Lionel, seemed to only appear when he was needed by a straight character or for comic relief. Lionel, like Amanda, has so much potential and I pray that he gets an actual story and personality as the series progresses because watching him pine after his straight roommate got old quickly.

Like many things in my life, my feelings swirl around my intersections. I was disappointed in Lionel’s character because as a Black queer person, I’m used to seeing Black queer characters in Black media get used the same way. If a creator wants to throw in a laugh, throw in a flamboyant Black gay man or, in Lionel’s case, an extended masturbation scene.

Need some tragedy? Make his daddy beat his ass or throw him in a trash can a la “Empire.”

Amanda’s story struck me because although she was a white woman, I identify with how quickly her story was pushed aside and how typical it was for queer female portrayals. While male queer characters tend to be problematic, they are afforded dimensions that queer women don’t get. Queer women’s stories are almost always tragic or negative. Either something bad always happens to them or someone dies. They don’t get redemption or happily ever after. They’re merely an afterthought. It’s a little too close to reality considering queer women’s spaces are disappearing at an alarming rate.

On June 20th, vote Jon Ossoff for Congress.

Washington should be accountable to you.

www.ElectJon.com

jonossoff

@ossoff

Paid for by Jon Ossoff for Congress www.thegeorgiavoice.com

May 26, 2017 Outspoken 9

WORK IT!

LGBT BUSINESS NEWS

Missy Koefod, left, and her wife and business partner Kristin Koefod hope to open a new cocktail and coffee bar on the BeltLine by November. (Courtesy photo)

18.21 Bitters owners opening bar on BeltLine Missy and Kristin Koefod have a new venture in the works. The wife-wife team and owners of premium bitters and mixers business 18.21 Bitters in Ponce City Market are opening a new cocktail and coffee bar this fall. The 2,300-square foot space will spring up along the Atlanta BeltLine’s Eastside Trail between Krog Street Market and Studioplex.

The AJC reports that the bar’s tentative name is George, and Koefod confirmed with Georgia Voice that they are still working on that.

“We hope to be open [by] November and will be serving 18.21 craft cocktails in the back and serving coffee and aperitivos up front,” Koefod said. “Quite a few members of the 18.21 team will be involved and we are really excited.”

LGBTQ Therapist Resource supports community A group of metro Atlanta therapists created a new option for LGBT people seeking affirming mental health professionals.

The LGBTQ Therapist Resource provides a central directory of clinical resources to the LGBT community, as well as networking, promotion and educational opportunities to clinicians.

“Our members are specialists and experts in treating the LGBTQQIAA community,” LGBTQ Therapist Resource Vice President

Melissa Olson told Georgia Voice. “We are providers who identify as a member of the community, who pursue specialized training, whose practices offer specialized services such as groups and events and/or whose practices are predominantly LGBTQ. Within our membership, specializations are indicated so that anyone seeking a specialized provider can be assured they will be treated by a trained, knowledgeable and affirming provider.”

People in search of such services can access the LGBTQ Therapist Resource at www.lgbtqtherapistresource.com.

Event planning firm relocates to Atlanta Wedding and special event planning firm Liquid Events relocated to Atlanta.

“Atlanta has always been on my radar,” Liquid Events owner Sean Finnegan, an Atlanta Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce member, told Georgia Voice. “I started Liquid five years ago in Miami and Palm Beach. I cater to a very niche market; most of my clients are high-profile celebrities or athletes. When the television and film industries were offered tax credits, it brought Hollywood to Atlanta. So I brought my A-game and here we are.”

Finnegan says Liquid has some high profile local events coming up this summer, but is staying mum on which ones while contracts are under negotiation.

–By Patrick Saunders

10 Community May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

COMMUNITY PREVIEW

Bad drag doing good one more time in East Point 2017 marks the end of South’s largest outdoor charity drag show

Details

20th Annual – and final – East Point Possums show Saturday, June 3, 7-11 p.m.

2727 E Point Street, East Point www.facebook.com/ events/427701814276892

By DALLAS ANNE DUNCAN dduncan@thegavoice.com Global climate change affects us all — even those sequin-clad marsupials called the East Point Possums. Rising summer temperatures is the main reason founding Possum Rick Westbrook said 2017 marks the end of the road for the South’s largest outdoor benefit drag show.

“I don’t think it’s sunk in yet. … I think it will be missed,” Westbrook said. “Everybody has a good time, but when it’s outdoors in June, it could be 80 or 90 degrees. Even if you’re in shorts on an open field, it can wear on you pretty quick.”

Bobby Dukes of Tucker, Georgia only found out about it last year and said he was heartbroken over the decision to end the East Point show.

“There needs to be more. Move it to a different venue or something,” he said. “I’m hoping that it’s not the last one and it’s just been put on a shelf for a couple years until they can find a new place.”

20 years of drag after dark The storied history of the East Point Possums began in 1998, when Westbrook, Chuck Jenkins, Chesley Thurman and John Jeffrey each received an invitation.

“A friend of ours threw a Fourth of July party and he wanted everybody to do drag.

He wasn’t a drag queen at all, but this was 20 years ago. It was a big thing to put on a dress and walk around and perform,” Westbrook said. “He set up a little wooden stage in the backyard and his husband put out lights.”

That kicked off a yearly tradition that quickly grew in crowd size — and also quickly moved a month earlier to avoid sweltering Independence Day temperatures for the South’s largest outdoor benefit drag show.

“After the fourth year it, literally, you could not park on the street. There was not room to www.thegeorgiavoice.com

After 20 years taking the stage to benefit LGBT nonprofits, this will be the final year of the East Point Possums show — the South’s largest outdoor drag extravaganza. (File photo)

“It was not like any type of Pride parade or gathering or meeting.

It was a community. It was family showing up for one another in a reunion to celebrate whatever they decided to celebrate.”

—Bobby Dukes of Tucker, Georgia stand in his backyard,” Westbrook said. “I remember the first time I had to go get a permit from the city of East Point. I had to bill it as a ‘Shakespearian variety show’ because I was afraid they wouldn’t like it as a drag show.”

The show’s come a long way in helping educate Atlanta about the LGBT community. For instance, the East Point police quickly learned that “drag show” and “drag race” are not the same. As for the show’s name, it came from the way Westbrook and Jeffrey were introduced the first time they performed together: they’re not real pretty, so they only come out after dark.

Though not the original intention, the Possums realized the fundraising power of their glittery prowess, and added a charitable arm to the show.

“People just started throwing money at the stage no matter how good or bad the

person was,” Westbrook said. “We would take the money back that people donated, and donate it anonymously … but then it grew to $1,000, $5,000 and we couldn’t do that anonymously. It’s hard to just drop that in a bucket.”

Now, proceeds benefit Lost-n-Found Youth, a nonprofit Westbrook founded that assists homeless LGBT children and young adults get settled. Last year, the donation totaled $23,000.

‘An experience like none other’ The Possums host 20 back-to-back performances on stage, many “doing good work through bad drag.” Westbrook said occasionally straight women even offer their husbands as drag acts for the charity bill.

“It kind of gives you the full monty,” said Michael Howell, who performs as Ginny

Tonic. “We have some, shall we say, pseudo-professionals, and then we have people who just do it for the fun of it.”

Howell said his performance at this final East Point Possums event will be Ginny Tonic’s signature rendition of “Looking for a City.” He got involved with the show about 15 years ago.

“I was one of the original Armorettes at the Armory Bar and it just kind of flowed from that,” he said. “It was a great point to come together, the main thing being that we were helping people whose ability to help themselves was extremely limited.”

There are “cute boys in bikinis,” “girls with big boobies,” plenty of booze and guest emcee Rowan, son of Atlanta Pride’s Jamie Fergerson, Westbrook said. His fondest memories of the show include watching kids drag their fathers up to the stage so they can hand money to a queen, and elderly women being pulled on stage for lap dances.

“It was not like any type of Pride parade or gathering or meeting. It was a community. It was family showing up for one another in a reunion to celebrate whatever they decided to celebrate,” Dukes said. “The Possum Show isn’t just a show. The community comes together and they love one another, so they support one another.”

Westbrook promises a big surprise at the end of the 2017 show, but like Dukes, Howell was saddened to hear this was the final year for the East Point revelry.

“It brings straight and gay, black and white, the whole rampart of people in the city together for one night,” Howell said.

“It just gives everybody a chance to laugh at themselves, to laugh at each other, and to do good. The fact that it’s an LGBT charity is immaterial. It’s the fact that we all come together to just enjoy our similarities and not dwell on our differences.”

May 26, 2017 Community 11

“Hey HIV —— understand this —— we’re living together but I give the orders.”

Ashley - Atlanta, GA Living with HIV since 2006.

Being in the military prepared me for a lot of things, but not my HIV diagnosis. I found it difficult to take medication every day.

Fortunately, with the help of my doctor at the VA, taking my medicine is just another part of my morning routine, brush my teeth, wash my face, and take my meds. By sticking to my medication, doctor visits and support groups, I stay healthy and happy. As a support group leader, now I’m helping others to get into their own routine.

HIV

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Get in care. Stay in care. Live well. cdc.gov/HIVTreatmentWorks

LGBT NONPROFITS

Counting the cash Georgia Voice examines LGBT nonprofit financial records to see how your dollars are spent

By DALLAS ANNE DUNCAN dduncan@thegavoice.com

Atlanta’s LGBT nonprofits run the gamut: assisting homeless and transgender youth; raising awareness of issues related to inclusivity, feminism and people of color; educating and testing ATL-iens for HIV/AIDS; lobbying on behalf of the community; networking with business owners; and more.

Though a number of these organizations receive government grant funding, a great portion of their work would be impossible without the greater LGBT and ally communities opening their pocketbooks and checkbooks. Georgia Voice examined the IRS Form 990s — a tax form required of nonprofits to prove their tax-exempt status — of 13 LGBT nonprofits in the metro area to see how your money is spent.

An additional seven did not respond with the requested records as of press time: Positive Impact Health Centers, Atlanta Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, AIDS Research Consortium of Atlanta, THEA-Plus, In the Life Atlanta, SPARK Reproductive Justice Now! and Southerners on New Ground. ZAMI NOBLA declined to share its financial records.

Form 990s are due on May 15 of each year, unless an organization requested a filing extension or an exemption. Both Trans Housing Atlanta and Pride School were exempt from filing for 2016, as they did not receive enough donations to meet the required $50,000 threshold.

Georgia Equality files its 990 based on a fiscal year, not a calendar year, so its financials include data from 2015 and 2016.

AID ATLANTA (2015)* Mission: Reduce new HIV infections and improve the quality of life of HIV-positive individuals and others in the Atlanta area affected by HIV/AIDS. Head Honcho Pay: $88,420 This number reflects the amount paid to Executive Director Nicole Roebuck between October and December 2015.

In addition, former CEO Stanley James Hughey was compensated $222,109 for work between February and October, and prior to that, former Executive Director Jose Rodriguez-Diaz received $22,329 for January to February of that year.

Total Income: $9,534,464 Total Expenses: $8,824,837

Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $8,418,202 Top Gift, Grant or Contributor: Information not disclosed Did You Know?

In 2014, AID Atlanta became the direct provider of outpatient ambulatory healthcare for HIV-positive patients. In 2015, $2.1 million was spent to provide STD and HIV testing and treatment, plus primary care, to these individuals, regardless of their ability to pay for services.

ATLANTA PRIDE (2015) Mission: Promote unity, visibility and self-esteem amongst members of the LGBT community

in Atlanta and beyond by sponsoring and hosting a number of events throughout the year.

Head Honcho Pay: $35,555 In 2015, former Executive Director Buck Cooke’s term overlapped with that of the new executive director, Jamie Green-Fergerson. Cooke’s salary was reported on the IRS Form 990 as $38,256 for that year.

Total Income: $782,469 Total Expenses: $826,801 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $500,772 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Coca-Cola and T-Mobile USA at $50,000 each

CONTINUES ON PAGE 15

14 LGBT Nonprofits May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

LGBT NONPROFITS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 14 Did You Know?

About 250,000 people attended the 45th annual Atlanta Pride Festival in October 2015. That festival was supported by a number of corporate donors as well, including Wells Fargo, Atlanta Beverage Company, Target and MailChimp.

CHARIS CIRCLE (2015) Mission: Works directly with authors, activists and artists across the South to bring innovative and thoughtful programming to Atlanta’s feminist communities.

Head Honcho Pay: $30,000 Total Income: $102,149 Total Expenses: $92,812 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $102,149 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Sheila Anderson of Atlanta, $25,000 Did You Know?

Since 2011, Charis Circle collected more than $353,000 in donations and gifts, which go toward hosting feminist and inclusive events and workshops at the for-profit Charis Books and More.

GEORGIA EQUALITY AND EQUALITY FOUNDATION OF GEORGIA (2015-16) Mission: Works with legislators and other organizations to advance fairness, safety and opportunity for Georgia’s LGBT communities.

Georgia Equality files the IRS Form 990 based on fiscal years. Information was gathered from provided budget and financial audit for September 2015 to September 2016.

Head Honcho Pay: $87,000 Total Income: $1,429,400 Total Expenses: $1,414,170 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $870,170 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Gill Foundation, $200,000 Did You Know?

Many of Georgia Equality and the Equality Foundation of Georgia’s operating expenses are covered by in-kind donations totaling just shy of $65,000 each year. These in-

www.thegeorgiavoice.com

clude rent, utilities, office expenses, phones and tech support.

JERUSALEM HOUSE (2015) Mission: Provide permanent housing to Atlanta’s low-income and homeless individuals and families affected by HIV/AIDS. Head Honcho Pay: $117,200 Total Income: $5,255,976 Total Expenses: $5,274,585 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $4,905,987 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: $3,338,796 was given by an undisclosed donor Did You Know?

In 2015, Jerusalem House provided 144 apartments around the metro Atlanta area for low-income families or families with at least one member who had HIV/AIDS. In addition, 12 apartments were provided for single, HIV-positive mothers and their families. More than $3.9 million comes from government grants to help fund these programs.

LOST-N-FOUND YOUTH, INC. (2015) Mission: Assists homeless LGBT youth in Atlanta with transitioning to permanent housing.

Head Honcho Pay: $49,154 Total Income: $508,858 Total Expenses: $413,304 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $326,154 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: An anonymous donor from Community Foundation donated an undisclosed amount in 2015 as Lost-n-Found’s biggest contributor, per Lost-n-Found Youth Executive Director Rick Westbrook. Since a Schedule B form wasn’t filed, the amount was less than $5,000.

Did You Know?

The sale of donated clothing and household goods from Lost-n-Found’s original thrift store location — prior to its Norcross shop opening — brought in $527,151 during 2015.

NAESM (2015) Mission: Provides networking and leadership to address health issues

affecting black gay men, and build a community adamant about eliminating these conditions.

Head Honcho Pay: $64,536 Total Income: $1,264,855 Total Expenses: $1,177,022 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $870,658 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Gilead Sciences, $158,137 Did you know?

Between 2013 and 2015, more than 6,000 HIV tests were conducted thanks to donations to NAESM. The organization identified more than 125 patients during this time period. The majority of funding for these programs, in 2015, came from grants totaling $868,577.

OUT ON FILM (2016) Mission: Showcase films with a LGBT connection and highlight out actors, directors and others involved in the movie industry through an annual festival.

Head Honcho Pay: $28,000 Total Income: $58,693 Total Expenses: $62,592 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $29,479 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: $5,000 each was donated by Fulton County Arts and Culture, Turner Broadcasting System and Out On Film Board Chair Craig Hardesty Did You Know?

During the 2016 Out On Film Festival, nearly 9,000 movie buffs watched 121 films and documentaries. Out On Film recently received a $90,000 grant from Turner Broadcasting, which is split into $30,000 for each of the 2017, ’18 and ’19 festivals — just in time for the 30th anniversary this year.

PRIDE SCHOOL ATLANTA (2016 TO 2017) Mission: Provide a safe, inclusive, gender-affirming school environment for Atlanta’s K-12 students, and be a voice for advocacy in the community.

Information gathered for this section

CONTINUES ON PAGE 16 May 26, 2017 Nonprofits 15

LGBT NONPROFITS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 15 comes from a 2016 to 2017 profit and loss statement. Pride School filed for an exemption for its 2016 Form 990 as it did not meet the designated receipt threshold of $50,000 for the 2016 calendar year.

Head Honcho Pay: $16,000 Total Income: $89,974 Total Expenses: $78,085.50 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $27,009.98 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Drag queen Ruby Redd’s community fundraising events brought in $3,700, and local artist Randi Michelson donated approximately $12,000 in in-kind donations of custom Pride swag. Aon Corporation is expected to donate $5,000 this year, Pride School’s largest donation yet.

Did You Know?

For school operations — things like library books, liability insurance, technology, classroom supplies, printing and copying — it cost $5,870.30 to keep Pride School’s day-to-day going strong during this school year.

REAL YOUTH, INC. (2014) Mission: Foster a positive networking and mentoring environment for LGBT and ally youth.

Information gathered for this section comes from a three-year tax plan submitted in 2014.

Head Honcho Pay: Information not provided Total Income: $10,000 Total Expenses: $9,100 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $8,500 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Information not disclosed Did you know?

Donations to Real Youth go toward renting office space for drop-in group sessions and purchasing food for community events, such as meals distributed to those in need

by Real Youth members and mentors.

SOMEONE CARES, INC. (2015) Mission: Address the health disparities of HIV/AIDS in the LGBT community and

During the 2015 to 2016 fiscal year for which it files taxes, LGBT nonprofit Georgia Equality brought in more than $870,000 in gifts, grants and contributions to go toward its activities lobbying for equal rights. (File photo) provide needed services, education and outreach to the Atlanta area.

Head Honcho Pay: $89,537 Total Income: $737,853 Total Expenses: $557,681 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $93,461 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Information not disclosed Did You Know?

In 2015, $127,063 was spent on the Reaching, Educating, Assisting and Liberating Trans (REAL/T) program, one of three major initiatives put forth by Someone Cares. REAL/T reached 918 transgender individuals that year, providing programming to assist them with job readiness, name change, mental health and HIV and STD screenings.

THE HEALTH INITIATIVE (2015) Mission: Improve the health and well-being of Georgia’s LGBT community through education, access to support and advocacy.

Financials for The Health Initiative also include the full operation of the Phillip Rush Center.

Head Honcho Pay: Information not disclosed Total Income: $486,169 Total Expenses: $533,317 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: $345,794 Top Gift, Grant or Contribution:

Seedco, $146,004 Did You Know?

The Rush Center is a program of The Health Initiative, but an agreement exists between it and the Equality Foundation of Georgia to share responsibility for various aspects of the Rush Center’s activities. This includes cosigning the lease for extra space and helping to raise funds for the program.

TRANS HOUSING ATLANTA, INC. (2016) Mission: Provide homeless transgender and gender nonconforming individuals with access to safe housing, job readiness training and supportive care.

Trans Housing Atlanta was exempt from filing an IRS Form 990 in 2016 because it did not meet the threshold of having receipts greater than $50,000 for that calendar year.

Head Honcho Pay: Entirely volunteer-led Total expenses: $7,600 Total Gifts, Grants and Contributions: Information not disclosed Top Gift, Grant or Contribution: Information not disclosed Did You Know?

In addition to offering micro-grant assistance for things like emergency housing and utility assistance, Trans Housing Atlanta provides free legal assistance and education about knowing your rights when facing eviction. * Denotes year for which most recent data was provided

16 Nonprofits May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

LGBT NONPROFITS

Georgia’s LGBT nonprofits in your own words Readers weigh in on how various groups have affected their lives

By PATRICK SAUNDERS psaunders@thegavoice.com “Raising children to recognize and celebrate not only their own, but everyone’s, full range of complex and unique human expressions is one of the primary focuses of my life.

I believe that we can do that with relationships and stories. And Charis provides both.

Their Race-Conscious Parenting Collective, led by ER Anderson and Shannon Gaggero, has provided us with the framework to work for justice and a community of people doing the same. I am profoundly grateful.”

-Leigh Ann Luscan on Charis Circle “Solutions Not Punishment Collaborative deeply appreciates the contributions Atlanta Pride has made to our work and our communities over the last couple years. They have been a critical partner in our work to uplift the voices and lives of black trans and queer people in this city, put an end to the criminalization of our communities and keep us safe on the streets and in our homes.

They come through!”

-Xochitl Bervera of Solutions Not Punishment Collaborative on Atlanta Pride “THEA has been an inspiring, amazing and wonderful organization to my son and me. We have not experienced so much warmth and love at this difficult time in our lives – my son’s transition. THEA is brimming with friendly and loveable people who understand exactly what you are going through and are willing to go with you through the tough times. Attending THEA’s Family Symposium, listening to the knowledgeable speakers and being around such wonderful people made me understand a lot about my own child. This is bittersweet though because he is not accepted and understood. After meeting the people at THEA, I am overjoyed. My child has never been happier in his life. It brought tears to see my child involved in the activities with youth

Leigh Ann Luscan and family, Anne ‘Sarge’ Barr and C. Emile Dacus, clockwise from above. (Courtesy photos)

and young adults who are going through the same challenges. I had never seen him more comfortable with himself. Yes, he even did the dance ... Electric Slide. My heart is overjoyed from the wonderful people that I have seen and met. Hope to meet again soon.

Thanks to THEA, my child has hope.”

-Jennifer Barnwell on Transgender Health & Education Alliance “Jerusalem House took faith in me, provided me with an incredible apartment in Stone Mountain. After 20 years of living in the same apartment on Buford Highway, my quiet, creative, productive life as I knew it to be came to a screeching halt in 2015 with a notice of new owners. So, I began looking for a new home. The apartments I found were too bad to live in, too expensive and too far away. With the help of my many friends, Jerusalem House was mentioned. I followed this advice, applied and was accepted into their Scattered Site program. I was so depressed, worried and confused as to what to do. The incredible people of Jerusalem House took me under their wing, gave me a new home where I could continue living my life as

I had so many years before. Jerusalem gave me hope and love, which guided me into my new world. I say a million thanks and am blessed each day for the goodness of Jerusalem House and its many wonderful, caring people.”

-Ramon Parker on Jerusalem House “Before I joined the Real Youth organization, I was lost and confused with my sexuality, my faith and purpose in life. After attending two meetings facilitated by Mr. Darrell, I began to become more vocal in the open discussions. Mr. Darrell taught me to be comfortable with my sexuality and choice of religion. While participating in the open discussion on various topics like an ideal safe home for an LGBT member, I discovered my purpose. After graduation, I plan to become a social worker and community advocate for the LGBT community. In the short term, I would have never found my purpose and felt so uplifted and confident as a homosexual until I joined Real Youth.”

-Sidney Smith on Real Youth “I had the pleasure of working with Georgia Equality as a Youth HIV Policy Adviser

over two years ago. After meeting the staff and becoming informed on so many issues plaguing not only the LGBTQ community, but Georgia as a whole, I wanted to get more involved. Since then, I have gone on to continue my work in civic engagement, working as program coordinator for ProGeorgia, the state table organization that Georgia Equality introduced me to. I have found so much joy and fulfillment in working with this dynamic organization.”

-C. Emile Dacus on Georgia Equality “The Health Initiative has improved my life and given me a chance to walk again by assisting me with paperwork, getting doctor connections and instructions for receiving a Grady card. I now have a new knee and could not be happier or more grateful to Linda Ellis and Darie Wolfson for being there for me all the way! Their tireless work at helping everyone live healthier, happier, more productive lives is a blessing, a priceless gift! They set a good example for all. They care and show LGBTQ people they matter and are never alone.”

-Anne “Sarge” Barr on The Health Initiative

18 LGBT Nonprofits May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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HIGHLIGHTS INCLUDE: (6/4) (6/5) (6/8) (6/10) (6/14) (6/17) (6/17) (6/21) (6/24)

Touching Up Our Pride Roots Trolley Tour Real Boy Documentary Screening Forever Strong: Orlando Tribute Sylvia Rivera Day of Service Out on Film Screening of Jewel's Catch One Georgia Equality's Evening for Equality Touching Up Our Pride Roots Trolley Tour Stonewall Poetry event Stride Into Pride at Six Flags Over Georgia

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May 26, 2017 Ads 19

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Otep

in resistance Nu-metal singer, activist Otep Shamaya: ‘We bring a message that we have not yet begun to fight’

By SHANNON HAMES Lesbian nu-metal vocalist, artist and activist Otep Shamaya radiates her passion like a flashing, studded, spiked, light-up-the-freaking-sky neon sign.

A two-hour interview (scheduled for 15 minutes) revealed her to be a bubbling fountain of political insight with a volcanic passion for fairness, equality and LGBT rights. Her mind seems to run at full-throttle. Trying to steer the conversation was like trying to steer an exploding comet.

I spoke with Shamaya in advance of her band, Otep, playing a show in Atlanta on June 7. True to form, she barely spoke about herself or her music and instead preferred to talk about the problems stemming from the current political climate surrounding the Trump administration and how marginalized groups were being affected. I was finally able to lure her away from political discourse with a pointed question.

CONTINUES ON PAGE 22

www.thegeorgiavoice.com

May 26, 2017 A&E 21

Details

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 21

What’s your favorite song to fuck to?

Nobody has ever asked me that! If I want it to be romantic, Goldfrapp’s record “Felt Mountain” is nice. And also “The End” by The Doors.

It’s a spiritual song. If it’s going to be an aggressive night, I like a little Nine Inch Nails in there.

The way that I write my music comes from the part of my brain that is dominated by sex. The foreplay, the catalyst to conclusions, the eruptions ... and, since I’m a lesbian, once isn’t enough so I keep going. I write music from that sexual perspective. This interview is the first time I’ve ever realized that my songs match up with my feral sex style. When I have sex, I want to be present and mindful of my partner. And when I’m on stage, I call it “spiritual intercourse” because I want to feel infinite passion with my audience.

The way you marry your music to your art is so beautiful and rich with symbolism. I was looking at a recent publicity photo and noticed the flecks of light, those subtle triangles buried in the image and the reflection in the mace you’re holding is the face of a wolf.

Very good! You’re the only one who has ever picked that up – that’s amazing! Put this in the article because I want you to get credit for it. That pic has been out for a year and nobody has noticed those symbols that we worked really hard to get in there.

To say you’re an activist is an understatement. It seems like activism defines you as

Otep Wednesday, June 7 at 7 p.m.

The Masquerade $14 in advance, $16 at the door www.masqueradeatlanta.com

Otep, led by singer Otep Shamaya, plays The Masquerade on June 7. (Courtesy photo)

much as being an artist or a musician.

I speak out for the communities that I care about. I came from the working class so I care about them. I care about all women.

Even though I am a lesbian and don’t plan to have children, I care about women’s reproductive rights. I fight vehemently for the rights of the LGBT community.

We are marginalized. We have to fight for anything we get. Straight people don’t know what it’s like to walk out of the house holding their loved one’s hand and immediately be judged or the target of ridicule.

I was in Hawaii celebrating an anniversary with an ex a few years back. We were taking couples surfing lessons. This old leathery man who looked like he worked out with 15-pound bicep curls for 20 years but forgot leg day for 25 years came up to

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us. He had a big bouffant hairdo and mantitties. He walked up to me and slapped me hard on the shoulder and said, “Happy Father’s Day!” It was Father’s Day so it confused me but I said, “Thank you.”

Then, he sarcastically said, “Oh, I thought you were a man.” I just looked at him and said, “No worries! I saw your breasts, thought you were a woman and was about to tell you that this wasn’t a topless beach.” Of all the couples of all ages and nationalities there to take lessons, he chose the one lesbian couple on the beach to target.

What are you listening to on your playlist right now?

Kendrick Lamar’s “Damn.”

That’s not what I was expecting.

My tastes range from Nirvana to Radiohead to Billie Holiday. For me, music is art.

As much as Picasso’s art is art, a song is that same amount of art. I’m an art lover. But if my heart gets broken, I don’t pull out Picasso to make me feel better. I listen to music to take me where I want to go. Plus, art is expensive and most songs are only $1.29. [laughs] What do you want to say to the LGBTQ community in Atlanta?

The tour is called “The Resistance Tour” to unite people who are part of the resistance who want to come and listen to some good music together. To the LGBTQ community that may have never heard of me because I’m not on your dance mix, I say that beyond the cacophony of our music and exotic sounds, we bring a message that we have not yet begun to fight. I invite you to come down and be a part of this because we are exclusively inclusive.

To the young people, I want them to know that adults are doing battle for them.

They are loved and I don’t want them to go anywhere. Some kids message me about being bullied and want to kill themselves. Don’t leave us in a monochrome world – keep your hue in this world. You all are just beginning to blossom, my loves!

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PUT YOUR BUSINESS IN THE SPOTLIGHT CONTACT: SALES@THEGAVOICE.COM 22 A&E May 26, 2017

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ACTING OUT

VOICES OF NOTE PRESENTS

By JIM FARMER

Openly gay director helms ‘Father Comes Home’

GIFT OF THE

The works of Suzan-Lori Parks are not just thought-provoking and deeply layered, but highly decorated as well. Her “Topdog/Underdog” won a Pulitzer and “Father Comes Home from the Wars (Parts 1, 2 and 3)” was a finalist for that award as well. Actor’s Express is staging the latter, in which a slave named Hero follows his master into the Civil War. We caught up with the production’s openly gay director, Martin Damien Wilkins – who grew up the son of ministers in Charlotte, North Carolina – to talk about the powerful themes of the show and how he came to stage it.

Hello, Martin. How did the directing gig come up?

Freddie [Ashley, Actor’s Express’ artistic director] and I first met a decade ago when he was the literary manager at the Alliance [Theatre] and reconnected a few years ago when I earned a producing residency through the National New Play Network. He was also a part of the selection panel when I earned a competitive directing fellowship that aimed to provide development opportunities and a directing assignment to early career directors fortunate enough to receive it. After I had earned the fellowship, Freddie expressed his interest in hiring me to direct a project.

When he first contacted me about directing this season, he didn’t tell me the name of the show because the theater was still working to secure the rights. I had my fingers crossed and was over the moon to learn that it was “Father Comes Home from the Wars.”

For those unfamiliar with the play, can you describe it?

Suzan-Lori Parks is one of the most brilliant playwrights writing for the theater today. She takes inspiration from Homer’s “Odyssey” to craft a Civil War-era story in three parts about an enslaved man who is offered his freedom if he agrees to fight alongside his master for the Confederates. As he embarks on this journey, Ms. Parks explores not only the political ramifications of Emancipation for the country, but she crafts a narrative that looks at how people grappled with the personal ramifications of freedom in a www.thegeorgiavoice.com

ISLES

MUSIC OF ENGLAND, IRELAND AND SCOTLAND

‘Father Comes Home from the Wars (Parts 1, 2 and 3)’ was a Pulitzer Pride award finalist.

(Photo by Christopher Bartelski for Actor’s Express)

manner that I hope resonates with audiences as having relevance to our current cultural and political landscape.

What themes of the show do you think are especially topical?

Throughout Hero’s journey, he is grappling with what his worth will be when he is free. He struggles to comprehend how his freedom makes him worth more if he doesn’t have a price. Although the play is set during the Civil War, audiences who are keen will see the allusions to the Black Lives Matter movement, which was coalescing when the play was being developed. I am also struck by the fact that in the play, there is also conversation about what will happen after Emancipation.

Historically, we know that it led to the horrific rise of Jim Crow. However, I can’t help but think that in our own current political climate where following the successful completion of two terms by our first black president, we seem to be a nation struggling again with how to progress forward.

How does being a gay man influence your choices as an artist?

Details

“Father Comes Home from the Wars (Parts 1, 2 and 3)” Through June 11 Actor’s Express 887 West Marietta St. N.W. Atlanta, GA 30318 www.actorsexpress.com

Being an openly gay man, I’ve had to learn to live my life boldly. My conservative church upbringing and the relentless bullying of peers really pulled me inside myself.

Giving myself permission to be an artist is what ultimately gave me a deeper understanding of who I am. I often tell people that I’m still in the family business, it’s just that the theater has become my ministry. I’m finding my voice in my work when it reflects the bold manner in which I want to live.

I’m really fortunate to be at a point in my career where I can choose the kind of work that really resonates with me. And as an artist who has worked regionally most recently, I am often directing in communities that are more conservative than cities like New York or Chicago. But, I enjoy the challenge.

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May 26, 2017 Columnists 23

EATING MY WORDS

By CLIFF BOSTOCK

Pop-up Thai tastiness in Candler Park A lot of what we assume is appropriate spiciness, in ethnic cooking in particular, is overstated. Think about it. You go to a Thai restaurant, for example, and say that you want your food “Thai-spicy.” After a couple of bites, your lips feel like a ring of fire, you are crying and your nose is dripping onto your plate. The reason is that the chef most likely has a pot of mild sauce that he dumps chiles into if you like it hot. That can obliterate other flavors.

All of this is by way of letting you know that when you go to the new Talal Market, you’re not going to be stuffing bumblebees in your pie hole. Talal (which itself means “market”) is a so-called pop-up restaurant that operates 6-10 p.m. Friday through Sunday inside Gato in Candler Park (1660 McLendon Ave., 404-371-0889). The chef is 27-year-old Parnass Lim Savang, who has already worked at a handful of the city’s best restaurants, and his locally-sourced cuisine is going to stun you.

First, a warning: Talal’s location inside Gato means you’re going to be competing with a crowd for one of four booths or a seat at the bar. When five of us went last Friday, we couldn’t get a seat after 45 minutes and crept away to nearby La Fonda. However, when I went on Sunday with a friend, we scored bar seats immediately.

Talal’s menu, which changes regularly, includes only five apps and entrées and a couple of sides, all intended to be shared.

There’s no alcohol served for the present, so BYOB. Whatever you do, order the coconut water. You’ll be served a whole, young coconut cut open at the top. It’s filled with the delicious sweet water that is naturally present before coconut milk is constituted.

Sip it through a straw and you can also scrape the interior with a long spoon to pull out soft coconut flesh.

There are two dishes we ordered to share as starters. Yum phonlamai’s central ingredient is peaches from Fort Valley’s Pearson Farm. Perfectly ripe and shockingly tasty for this early in the season, the fat slices are tossed with pineapple, lemongrass, cilantro, mint, coconut, shallots and spring onions.

Cliff Bostock calls the nam prik pao – sugar snap peas rolled in red chile jam, with sorrel, fried shallots and puffed rice – at Talal ‘mind-blowing.’ (Photo by Cliff Bostock)

Equally mind-blowing is nam prik pao: sugar snap peas rolled in red chile jam, with sorrel, fried shallots and puffed rice.

For my entrée, I chose sai ua samun phrai, a fat, herb-spiced sausage, sliced and served with mushroom broth for dipping.

You can wrap the sausage in leafy greens with pickled celery or eat them with a sticky rice like you’ve never had before, served in a traditional Thai basket.

Our other entrée was a large bowl of tom yum pla. If you like the lunchtime give-away tom yum soup in Thai cafes around town, this version is going to blow your mind. It’s a hot and sour soup that is fish-based. Its red snapper has no funky evidence of overcooking. There’s also lemongrass, gingery galangal root, Thai green chiles, oyster mushrooms, cilantro and its spicier cousin, culantro. The layers of flavor in this soup are astonishing and, yes, it’s pretty damn spicy.

Unfortunately, the restaurant’s dessert, made with a fermented rice ice cream and lime zest, was sold out. Unfortunately, too, Talal doesn’t accept reservations. You have until September to savor Chef Savang’s breakthrough cuisine. Go. Cliff Bostock is a former psychotherapist now specializing in life coaching. Contact him at 404-518-4415 or cliffbostock@gmail.com.

24 Columnists May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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Our Guide to the Best LGBT Events in Atlanta for May 26-June 8

BETS T ES

EVEN FRIDAY, MAY 26 – MONDAY, MAY 29

No need to road trip this Memorial Day weekend – come through My Sister’s Room for all sorts of events catered for ladies, hosted by Kia Comedy and the Andro Fashion Show Team. Besides drag and dance shows, after-parties will be held Friday and Saturday night. Friday is Lesbian Speed Dating, then the Andro Fashion Show models take the stage for a Thrift Fashion Show, Androgyny Upcycled. The lovely Beautifull starts off Sunday with Brunch and Burlesque, followed by Kia Comedy’s signature Queer Comedy Show, featuring the best LGBT comedians from the tri-state area. Closing the weekend on Monday is the Block Party & Cookout followed by The Grand Finale, My Sisters Room, 66 12th St. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.facebook.com/ events/361610567573657

FRIDAY, MAY 26 – SATURDAY, MAY 27

The 2017 Southern Fried Queer Pride Festival closes its five-day event this weekend in various Atlanta venues.

From workshops to gallery exhibitions to dance parties and performance art nights, there’s a lot on the menu. Events include a Queer Qumbia, The Jewel Box: A Trans Resilience Social, a Digital Queerness Gallery Opening, Look Who’s F*cking Now – A Black Porn Critique, Colorbloq: a QTPOC Potluck and HAWT Sauce: a Dance Party, www.facebook.com/ events/799192473564907

SATURDAY, MAY 27

Venkman’s welcomes back ATL Collective tonight for its presentation of Sade’s Stronger Than Pride and other Sade favorites. One of Atlanta’s finest musicians and India.Arie bandmate,

26 Best Bets May 26, 2017

FRIDAY, JUNE 2

Go mod at the Warhol Factory Party! Be the first to see the exhibition Andy Warhol: Prints from the Collections of Jordan D. Schnitzer and His Family Foundation before it officially opens to the public tomorrow. Enjoy a drop-in screen printing in partnership with Indie Craft Experience and Broken Window Theory, factory-inspired music spun by DJ Teknology, a silver photo-booth, Warhol-inspired screen tests, exhibition tours and more. Remember to dress as your favorite Warhol Factory regular, like Candy Darling, Edie Sedgwick, The Velvet Underground and Basquiat, 6-10 p.m. High Museum of Art, 1280 Peachtree St. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.facebook.com/events/468998700116263 (Photo courtesy of High Museum) Khari Carbral Simmons, curates. 1011:30 p.m., 740 Ralph McGill Blvd. N.E, Atlanta, GA 30312, www.facebook.com/ events/1920944641487063

and host Peaches for the rowdy Midtown Rouge, 8:30 p.m., Blake’s, 227 10th St. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.blakesontheparkatlanta.com

SUNDAY, MAY 28

MONDAY, MAY 29

Join Raquell, Evah, Shawnna, Michelle

Play Texas Hold’Em tonight for free

at Friends at 8:30 p.m., 736 Ponce de Leon Ave., Atlanta, GA 30308, www.friendsonponce-atl.com

TUESDAY, MAY 30

Hydrangea Heath Presents Dorothy, a monthly dance party bringing under-

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TELL US ABOUT YOUR LGBT EVENT

Submit your LGBT event for inclusion in our online and print calendars by emailing event info to editor@thegavoice.com ground house and techno to 529 in East Atlanta Village, featuring DJs Robert Ansley, Vicki Powell and Chelsea Starr, 10 p.m. to 3 a.m., 529 Flat Shoals Ave. S.E., Atlanta, GA 30316, www.facebook. com/events/2269774099914321

WEDNESDAY, MAY 31

Outrageous! Hilarious! Campy! Edie Cheezburger emcees Twisted Broadway tonight at Lips Atlanta, 3011 Buford Highway, Atlanta, GA 30329, www.lipsatl.com

THURSDAY, JUNE 1 – MONDAY, JUNE 4

Three tasting tent sessions, 10 dinners and events and 85 learning experiences including 200 chefs and presenters make up the 2017 Atlanta Food and Wine Festival, 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Loews Atlanta Hotel, 1065 Peachtree St. N.E, Atlanta, GA 30309, www.facebook.com/ events/1621474254537389

THURSDAY, JUNE 1

Join the Atlanta book launch party for Equally Wed co-founder Kirsten Palladino’s “Equally Wed: The Ultimate Guide to Planning Your LGBTQ+ Wedding.” Complimentary wine and SweetWater beer, light bites from Radial Café and a floral inspiration by Adaptation Floral Design will be available. Copies

of the book will be available for purchase from literary sponsor Charis Books and More. A donation of $5 or more is suggested for Georgia Equality, 6-8 p.m., Phillip Rush Center, 329 Mell Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.facebook.com/ events/1873655629544789 Movies in Central Park is going ‘90s this year. This season, join them every Thursday night for a nostalgic glimpse back. Tonight’s movie is “Fried Green Tomatoes,” 6-9 p.m., Atlantic Station, 1380 Atlantic Drive N.W., Atlanta, GA 30363, www.facebook.com/ events/107876669754072

FRIDAY, JUNE 2

Lady Parts Justice League is a coven of hilarious, witty feminist comedians and writers who use humor and pop culture to expose the haters fighting against reproductive rights. They believe if there is not laughter, dancing and sexy time in your revolution, you need to fix it. Hosted by co-founder and “The Daily Show” creator Lizz Winstead, the comedy show features a diversity of voices that not only spread the good word on reproductive rights, but also fight sexism, racism and homophobia.

8 p.m., Terminal West, 887 W. Marietta St. N.W., Atlanta, GA 30318, www.terminalwestatl.com. More information at www.vagicalmysterytour.com

SATURDAY, MAY 27

Stage Door Players’ farcical “Boeing, Boeing” has a performance tonight at 8 p.m., running through June 11, 5339 Chamblee Dunwoody Road, Dunwoody, GA 30338, www.stagedoorplayers.net (Publicity photo)

SATURDAY, JUNE 3 – JUNE 4

The Virginia Highland Summerfest celebrates 34 years of art, food and fun this weekend, both days 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., 833 Virginia Ave. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30306-3630, www.facebook.com/ events/380062989060309

SATURDAY, JUNE 3

After 20 years, this is the final East Point Possums show. Come see the largest number of drag acts in the Southeast entertaining you while raising money for Lost-nFound Youth. 7-11 p.m., 2727 E. Point St., East Point, GA 30344, www.facebook.com/events/427701814276892 Legendary Children’s HOGTIED returns to Heretic and your favorite performers are back for more. Dust off those dog masks and come in your best fetish/ leather/bondage/latex gear! This year’s special guest is Eureka from “RuPaul’s Drag Race” with performances by Biqtch Puddin’, Brigitte Bidet, Daddie Dearest, Dax Exclamation Point, Ellisorous Rex, Mystery Meat, JayBella Banks and music from Prima Nocta aka King Atlas and Robert Ansley, 10 p.m. to 3 a.m., 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.facebook. com/events/451276885223117

SUNDAY, JUNE 4 FRIDAY, JUNE 2 – SATURDAY, JUNE 3

The Candler Park Music & Food Festival is back with two days of live music, dozens of Atlanta’s food trucks and festival food favorites, an artist and craft market and a Saturday morning 5K run benefiting Atlanta ContactPoint. Friday’s music includes Railroad Earth, Matisyahu, Ripe, Chelsea Shag and Saturday’s includes Joe Russo’s Almost Dead, The Motet, Lake Street Dive, The Marcus King Band, Pigeons Playing Ping Pong and Webster Band Atlanta. Candler Park, 1500 McClendon Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.facebook.com/events/1839086136357065 (Publicity photo)

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Kick off the global Pride season by learning about important local LGBT history. Join the LGBT Institute, Touching Up Our Roots and Atlanta Pride today at the Center for Civil and Human Rights as they board the trolley with LGBT friends and allies to explore our LGBT history. This two-hour tour, narrated by local LGBT historian Dave Hayward and others, will offer

a glimpse into the past while enjoying an afternoon of fun. The tour will begin and end at the Center for Civil and Human Rights. 1 p.m., 100 Ivan Allen Jr. Blvd. N.W., Atlanta, GA 30313, www.lgbtinstitute.org/history-tour

MONDAY, JUNE 5

Independent Lens/PBS presents a screening of the documentary “Real Boy,” co-sponsored by CHRIS 180, Atlanta Pride and Out On Film. The film is the coming-of-age story of Bennett, a trans teenager with dreams of musical stardom.

Stick around after the film for a livestream interview with director Shaleece Haas and open mic featuring talented local artists, 7 p.m. RSVP here: http://bit.ly/2q9VQsc, participate in the open mic by registering here: http://bit.ly/2q9N7X0, Plaza Atlanta, 1049 Ponce de Leon Ave. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30306, www.facebook.com/ events/444034745948529 Trans and Friends is a youth-focused group for trans people, people questioning their own gender and aspiring allies, providing a facilitated space to discuss gender, relevant resources and activism around social issues. 7-8:30 p.m., Charis Books and More, 1189 Euclid Ave. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com The PFLAG support group for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning people and their parents and family meets tonight from 7:30-9 p.m., Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Atlanta (Room 209/210), 1605

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CONTINUED FROM PAGE 27 Interstate -85 Frontage Road, Atlanta, GA 30329, www.uuca.org

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 7

As part of the Resistance World Tour 2017, Otep jams at The Masquerade tonight with special guests The Convalescence, The World Over, Sickness In the System and Dead Reckoning. 7 p.m., 75 Martin Luther King Jr. Drive S.W., Atlanta, GA 30303, www.facebook.com/ events/1311326425625441 You better have your tickets already! Jake Shears of The Scissor Sisters plays at The Earl tonight, 8-11 p.m., 488 Flat Shoals Ave. S.E., Atlanta, GA 30316, www.badearl.com

THURSDAY, JUNE 8

SAGE Atlanta’s social hour begins at 10 a.m., followed by a program/meeting at 11 a.m., Phillip Rush Center Annex, 1530 DeKalb Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.rushcenteratl.org In partnership with Atlanta Contemporary’s signature program Contemporary Cocktails night, WUSSY will be releasing

28 Best Bets May 26, 2017

“The Fight Issue,” a brand-new arts/literary zine featuring work from over 30 Southern queer artists. A panel discussion on “Southern Queer Representation in Arts and Media” will feature Corian Ellisor (performance artist and drag mother at Mary’s), Jody Fausett (Idea Capital and Atlanta artist), Liliana Bakhtiari (arts activist and candidate for ATL City Council District 5), Leo Hollen Jr. (filmmaker and co-creator of “Queer Moxie”), Theresa Davis (Atlanta spoken word artist) and Zaida J (associate editor at WUSSY). Topics include: what is the Southern and queer narrative and how is it defined; the importance of the Southern queer narrative and the current state of Southern queer representation, 6-8:30 p.m., Atlanta Contemporary, 535 Means St. N.W., Atlanta, GA 30318, www.facebook. com/events/523010898088490 Building on the activist tradition of consciousness-raising groups, each month Charis Books and More invites community members to join The Personal is Political, a lightly facilitated group to talk about issues in their personal lives or in society as a whole that they are trying to process or deconstruct. The group will then use intersectional feminist strategies as tools to help talk through those issues, 7:30-9 p.m., 1189 Euclid Ave. N.E.,

Atlanta, GA 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com There is much to be learned and emulated as a result of the amazing banding together of the Orlando, Florida community after the tragic shooting at Pulse in June 2016. Atlanta Pride’s Stonewall Month’s Forever Strong event attempts to unite in solidarity with Orlando leaders in this dynamic conversation highlighting the strength of community when united in love, acceptance and equality. Orlando residents directly impacted by the Pulse nightclub shooting will share their unique experiences and their community’s collective healing journey. 8-11 p.m., Woodruff Arts Center,1280 Peachtree St. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.facebook. com/events/195539644270843/

UPCOMING SATURDAY, JUNE 10

CHRIS 180’s White Party is tonight, with DJ Yvonne Monet, a silent auction and food and drink, 7 p.m. Mason Fine Art, 415 Plasters Ave. N.E., Atlanta, GA 30324, www.whitepartyatlanta.org

EVENT SPOTLIGHT TUESDAY, JUNE 6

Ann Wilson of Heart performs at The Buckhead Theatre, 7:30 p.m., 3110 Roswell Road, Atlanta, GA 30305, www.thebuckheadtheatre.com (Publicity photo)

www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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May 26, 2017 Ads 29

THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID

By MELISSA CARTER

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A friend of mine in California is pregnant, and the first thing I told her was not to buy a thing. Why? Because it would be a waste of money.

I was not a woman that dreamed her whole life of being a mom. The thought ran through my mind a few times and really took hold after my transplant, but I was honestly OK with the idea of living my entire life without being a mother. So when the opportunity came giving me the chance to be one, I was amazed at this new world and all the material goods that came with it.

Most surprisingly, most of it I never used.

We had three baby showers – one from my coworkers, one from Katie Jo’s colleagues and one hosted by combined friends and family.

We did our best to create a registry and organize efforts to make sure nothing was duplicated, but I soon learned most women like to go rogue and give you whatever they either think is cute or what they themselves used the most as new mothers. I have also learned that each child comes equipped with its own personality, and whatever was good for one mom is not necessarily good for another.

When my West Coast friend announced she would be a first-time mother this fall, I immediately pulled out some boxes and started packing the items that a now 2-yearold Mr. Carter has no use for. And to my surprise, so many of what I put in these boxes still had the tag on them.

Here are some guidelines to follow, in case you are ever in the position to have to buy for a new mom: Do the math. You know when the due date for the baby is, so do the math on what clothes you buy the little one. I placed several warmer clothes in my donation boxes because several of the coats and sweaters given may have been adorable, but would have fit Mr. Carter in the middle of summer. On the opposite end, no swimsuits or swim shoes when the only water a baby is going to see in

“Most items should be for home use, including clothes. That ruffled dress and small suit can bring an immediate smile, but it isn’t practical.” its first few months is in the tub.

Babies are home most of the time. Parents of newborns are exhausted for several reasons. The baby is up throughout the day and night, they are stressed at the new idea of taking care of a human being and they can’t do anything without the baby and baby items in tow so their entire day is like a workout. Thus, most items should be for home use, including clothes. That ruffled dress and small suit can bring an immediate smile, but it isn’t practical. Plus, the kid will likely outgrow it before the parents get a chance to recover from fatigue and actually use the formal attire.

Not all diapers are the same size. My son was a big baby, so he started with bigger diapers.

If you plan on getting new parents diapers, you are better off getting a gift card for them, so that once the baby has arrived they will know which ones fit. Baby wipes, however, fit any baby and are something parents often forget.

I haven’t solved the problem. My multiple boxes, taped and ready to ship, only perpetuate the issue of too many baby things floating around. It will be interesting to see which things she actually uses and, repeating the cycle, which ones she secretly donates to someone else.

Melissa Carter is recognized as one of the first out radio personalities in Atlanta and has been heard over the years on B98.5 and Q100. In addition, she is a writer for the Huffington Post. Follow her on Twitter @MelissaCarter.

30 Columnists May 26, 2017 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

SOMETIMES ‘Y’

By RYAN LEE

Mann in the mirror I always hate to see someone humiliated or punished for behavior I’ve also engaged in, which is somewhat self-serving, but more an expression of kindred loyalty. It’s like the empathy most people would have for someone who got a speeding ticket for going 70 in a 65, a mixture of, “There but for the grace...” and, “Fuck ‘The Man!’” I haven’t enjoyed the arrest of DeKalb County Sheriff Jeffrey Mann as much as I should have, although I’m cynical enough to appreciate a law enforcement leader being ensnared by the web of incarceration our society has mistaken for a safety net. An Atlanta officer claims he was in “an area of the park known for sexual acts after dark” when Mann exposed himself then fled, and the media have castigated the sheriff while Gov. Nathan Deal attempts to castrate him via a special investigation.

As a man who has sought and stumbled into sexual encounters in Piedmont Park (usually) after dark, it’s troubling to see Mann’s reputation and career face the death penalty for an offense as severe as jaywalking or riding a bike on the sidewalk. Thankfully for Mann, entrapment seems an easy and obvious defense if the officer was wearing APD bicycle patrol shorts.

Many folks are disconcerted by an apparently closeted cop using his one-eyed monster to look for sex in a public park, but cruising among the bushes is as old as Adam and Eve, and it’s often nowhere near as obscene as folks perceive. This weekend, thousands of families with thousands of children will descend on Piedmont Park for the annual Jazz Festival, and as they listen to the Tivon Pennicott Quartet, they’ll be blissfully unaware of the inevitable blow jobs being enjoyed in the secluded crevices of the 185-acre park.

That’s because the majority of “public” sex takes place safely out of view, or as in the allegations against Mann, at an hour where they are not disruptive to anyone using the public location for its intended purpose.

Granted, stray condoms are a particularly noxious form of litter, but plenty of people www.thegeorgiavoice.com

“As a man who has sought and stumbled into sexual encounters in Piedmont Park (usually) after dark, it’s troubling to see Mann’s reputation and career face the death penalty for an offense as severe as jaywalking or riding a bike on the sidewalk.” who engage in public sex are intent on leaving no trace of their naughtiness.

Neighborhood activists have long claimed that late-night sex in Piedmont Park attracts drugs and crime to the area, ignoring how men have been cruising the trails for decades, and the biggest increases Midtown has seen have been in property value and rent.

And despite urban legends among gay men who have “a friend of a friend” who has been in the trails after sunset, murder and armed robbery are not routine.

I admire Mann defending his character and refusing to resign from office, although his long-term strategy is a mystery, and his realtime denials are incomplete and unconvincing.

Enough with the wiggling, Sheriff Mann.

Deal’s investigation into Mann’s arrest seems to be the biggest threat to the sheriff ’s survival, as the governor has spoken and reacted to the incident with an urgency that is unable to hide his disgust. Deal’s fervor is unmatched by many DeKalb residents and political leaders, with no intense push for Mann to resign despite admittedly bringing an “unfavorable light” upon the county.

Perhaps DeKalb voters, who have seen all but one of the sheriffs they elected in the last 50 years face criminal charges, consider going to “an area of the park known for sexual acts after dark” in search of a jerk-off buddy a refreshing show of restraint from their chief law enforcement officer.

Ryan Lee is an Atlanta writer.

May 26, 2017 Columnists 31