The Georgia Voice - 5/25/12 Vol.3, Issue 6

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NEWS Mayor Kasim Reed pressed to support gay marriage in wake of Obama’s affirmation. Page 4 Still gay in the GOP? Despite Obama’s announcement, gay Republicans say they’re sticking with their party. Page 6

OUTSPOKENIN THEIR OWN WORDS

President Obama’s ‘evolution’ Photo via americansfortruth.com

05.25.12

Coalition wants ‘no wedge’ between black voters, Obama on gay marriage. Page 11 Redistricting pits gay against gay-friendly in Ga. House races. Page 13

“For me personally, it is important to affirm that I think same-sex couples should be able to get married.”

VOICES

— President Obama, announcing his support for marriage equality in an interview with ABC News’ Robin Roberts (ABC News, May 9)

Editorial: an open letter to Mayor Reed on marriage equality. Page 18

Lesbian ‘alterna-grass’ band pays tribute to their foremothers. Page 21 Food Porn: the debut of GA Voice’s dining columnist Cliff Bostock. Page 23 Books: Alison Bechdel’s new graphic novel mines the ‘Mother’ lode. Page 25

Photo via Facebook

A&E

Theater: revisionist ‘Alice in Wonderland’ premieres, ‘Jersey Boys’ returns. Page 27

“Let me make it very clear, that my preference is to have a national standard that defines marriage as a relationship between a man and a woman.”

Photos: Good Cotillion Belles, ATL Sisters Give Back, Doggies on the Catwalk Page 29

COMMUNITY AID Atlanta Honors celebrates generation of HIV/AIDS advocacy. Page 31 Event spotlights: CHRIS Kids Premiere Party, Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus, OurSong summer concert. Page 33

CALENDAR Pages 34-36

COLUMNISTS That’s What She Said: Melissa Carter on remembering ALL of our fallen. Page 38 Domestically Disturbed: Topher Payne on religion and marriage equality. Page 39

“With his embrace of phony ’gay marriage,’ Obama outs himself as a soulless panderer with no core beliefs. He mocks his own Christian profession.”

Photo by Gage Skidmore

Briefs: Police advisory board seeks members, TV reports exaggerate trans prostitues, ‘Legalize Gay’ returns to Atlanta. Page 17

— GOP presidential hopeful Mitt Romney (CNN, May 9)

“What people do in their own homes is their business and you can choose to love whoever you love. That’s their business. It’s no different than discriminating against blacks. It’s discrimination plain and simple.”

—Hip-hop artist Jay-Z, supporting President Obama’s marriage equality announcement (Huffington Post via CNN, May 14)

“Once people begin to see the similarities between themselves and others, instead of focusing on differences, they come to recognize that equality is essentially a matter of human rights and human dignity. The president’s growth reflects the growth of many Americans on this issue.”

— Civil rights icon and U.S. Rep. John Lewis (D-GA) (via press release)

— Peter LaBarbera, founder for Americans for Truth About Homosexuality (via Twitter, May 9) Photo via Facebook

Ga. governor changes Day Against Homophobia to Mistreatment Awareness Day. Page 14

“Civil marriage is a civil right and a matter of civil law. The NAACP’s support for marriage equality is deeply rooted in the Fourteenth Amendment of the United States Constitution and equal protection of all people.”

— Benjamin Todd Jealous, president and CEO of the NAACP, on the historic civil rights group’s passage of a resolution backing gay marriage (Press conference, May 21)

“Call me cynical, but I wasn’t sure his views on marriage could get any gayer.”

— U.S. Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.), mocking Obama’s announcement in a speech to the Faith & Freedom Coalition (Mediaite.com, May 12)

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GA Voice

May 25, 2012

News

www.theGAVoice.com

‘Wrestling’ with marriage equality

Mayors who support marriage equality

Atlanta mayor pressed to support gay marriage in wake of Obama’s affirmation

Freedom to Marry, a national group working for marriage equality, started an initiative to get mayors of cities across the U.S. to show their support for same-sex marriage. The list currently includes 210 mayors, but only one from Georgia: Pine Lake Mayor Kathie deNobriga, who is openly lesbian.

By Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com

A few of the other mayors are listed here. To view the full list of Mayors for Marriage Equality, visit www.freedomtomarry.org or http://bit.ly/wruNry

Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed’s relationship with the city’s LGBT community has been a rocky road. The Atlanta Police Department’s botched 2009 raid on the Atlanta Eagle occurred during Mayor Shirley Franklin’s administration, but the long court battle and settlements of nearly $2 million to bar patrons who accused the APD of violating their constitutional rights came under Reed’s watch.

With the Eagle’s battles apparently finally put to rest with the last round of settlements in March, Reed faces a new challenge with LGBT Atlanta voters — support for same-sex marriage.

Reed was the only serious candidate for mayor in 2009 who did not support full marriage equality for gay and lesbian couples. He stated clearly he believed in civil unions and legal protections for gay couples but has always stopped short of saying he supports gay marriage.

And gay voters noticed. Many made it their litmus test when they supported Mary Norwood over Reed. He won the election by 715 votes, but lost District 6 — home to the city’s highest concentration of gay voters — by a margin of 40 percent.

Now, the stakes are higher for Reed among LGBT voters after President Barack Obama as well as the NAACP came out in support of same-sex marriage. The next Atlanta mayoral election is in 2013.

“I supported Mary Norwood for mayor and her position on marriage equality was a defining factor,” said Charlie Stadtlander, a gay teacher and former Atlanta school board candidate who recently started the Facebook campaign, “Mayor Reed It’s Time to Evolve on Marriage Equality” that now has close to 5,000 members.

“I had no allegiance to either candidate at the time, but she was very comfortable with LGBT equality and marriage and I thought she would make a great mayor,” Stadtlander said.

Stadtlander said he has come to see Reed as a great mayor who has done incredible works for the city and acknowledges his longtime support of LGBT equality. But he wants Reed to take that extra step and support same-sex marriage, especially as the mayor of a city known as a bastion for civil rights.

“He has that constant albatross around his neck,” Stadtlander said. “His longtime support of LGBT issues [as a state senator and representative] is overshadowed by this one particular issue. He could complete his entire career for equality like so many others have.”

Atlanta LGBT activists are pushing for Mayor Kasim Reed to support same-sex marriage following, in the footsteps of President Barack Obama and a number of mayors around the country. (Photo by Bo Shell)

On May 9, Pesident Barack Obama told the nation, “it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same-sex couples should be able to get married.”

Stadtlander’s Facebook page popped up later that night and on May 10 Reed issued a statement saying he is still “wrestling” with the idea of acceptance of marriage equality.

“I respect President Obama’s decision to stand in support of marriage equality. I have fought hard for the rights of gays and lesbians my entire political career from protecting adoption rights for gay and lesbian families, to voting against Georgia’s constitutional ban on same-sex marriage as a state senator, to serving as the state house sponsor for the only hate crimes bill ever passed in the state of Georgia,” Reed said.

“While I am still wrestling with my own personal beliefs on the issue of marriage, I deeply appreciate the contributions gays and lesbians make to our city every single day and I remain committed to Atlanta’s vibrant and diverse LGBT community,” he said.

Faith and politics

The Facebook page and Reed’s statement drew coverage from many Atlanta media outlets.

Meanwhile, the national media questioned President Obama’s decision to come out for marriage equality before the November election.

There was also much speculation by pundits on whether Obama would lose votes among black voters who attend church every Sunday and hear from the pulpit the evils of homosexuality.

Elder Antonio Jones, a gay pastor of Atlanta’s Unity Fellowship Church, said Reed, like Obama, has to consider black voters who have strong ties to the black church.

“The support from the black church is a real concern for [Reed],” said Jones, who said he has consulted with the mayor and also voted for him in 2009.

“The black churches are considered the gateway into the black community and you have to have that gateway,” he said.

Jones and his church recently became part of a coalition named NoWedge2012.com that will work against efforts by groups such as the National Organization for Marriage to drive a wedge between black voters and Obama because of Obama’s support of gay marriage.

This effort can and will trickle down to local races, Jones said.

Sharon Lettman-Hicks, executive director of the National Black Justice Coalition, which works on LGBT issues, said it will be Reed’s “personal decision on what side of history he wants to be on.”

But she said it paramount that strong black leaders, such as Reed, show leadership when it comes to showing support LGBT equality, and she hopes his evolution comes soon.

Like Obama, Reed — a member of Cascade United Methodist Church — has said due to his religious beliefs he was resistant to using the word “marriage” for gay couples in committed relationships.

That excuse doesn’t fly, Jones said.

“This is not a matter of you offending your faith,” Jones said. “This is a civil rights issue.

Religious convictions have no space in politics.

All citizens deserve equal rights.”

Obama turned to educating himself and talking to others to evolve on the issue. Reed can do the same, Jones said.

Jones is convinced the mayor will come

Samuel Adams - Portland, OR Matthew Appelbaum - Boulder, CO Tom Barrett - Milwaukee, WI William Bell - Durham, NC Virg Bernero - Lansing, MI Michael Bloomberg - New York, NY (Chair) Cory Booker - Newark, NJ Bruce Botelho - Juneau, AK Michael Brennan - Portland, ME Stephen Buxbaum - Olympia, WA Julian Castro - San Antonio, TX Mark Chilton - Carrboro, NC Chris Coleman - St. Paul, MN Frank Cownie - Des Moines, IA Aron Cromwell - Lawrence, KS Kathie deNobriga - Pine Lake, GA Rahm Emanuel - Chicago, IL William Euille - Alexandria, VA Vincent Gray - Washington, D.C. Michael Hancock - Denver, CO Bobby Hopewell - Kalamazoo, MI Satyendra Singh Huja - Charlottesville, VA Frank Jackson - Cleveland, OH Sylvester James, Jr. - Kansas City, MO Joe Jaworski - Galveston TX Mark Kleinschmidt - Chapel Hill, NC Edwin Lee - San Francisco, CA Craig Lowe - Gainesville, FL John Marks - Tallahassee, FL Thomas Menino - Boston, MA (Chair) Michael Nutter - Philadelphia, PA Annise Parker - Houston, Texas (Chair) Kitty Piercy - Eugene, OR Stephanie Rawlings-Blake - Baltimore, MD Gary Resnick - Wilton Manors, FL Jerry Sanders - San Diego, CA (Chair) Greg Stanton - Phoenix, AZ Antonio Villaraigosa - Los Angeles, CA (Chair) Dayne Walling - Flint, MI Dawn Zimmer - Hoboken, NJ

around and support full marriage equality, but he has to do carefully because, as a politician, he has to ensure he has constituent support.

“The mayor has always been very cautious for his entire administration. I think before he was mayor he was more aggressive on issue,” Jones said.

“But he can’t continue to be ambivalent.

You don’t have any other choice,” he said of the mayor’s decision to support marriage equality. “Wrestling with the issue is not going to cut the mustard.”

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MCTKW-7685 GA Voice Newspaper - Atlanta • 5/25 • LO1

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GA Voice

May 25, 2012

News

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Still gay in the GOP? Despite President Obama’s historic announcement, gay Republicans say they are sticking with their party

Lower taxes, more personal freedom and less government interference in the lives of Americans are the core principles of the Republican Party. At least, that’s what the GOP says. According to critics, including many LGBT people, what it does once in power is actually very different.

The anti-gay charge in recent years has been led by conservative groups, often with religious ties, like the National Organization for Marriage, the Family Research Council and Focus on the Family. These groups overwhelmingly support GOP candidates in local and national elections.

Republicans know a large portion of their base view homosexuality as inherently sinful. They also know to get elected, they have to sell their conservatism as well as their religious credentials.

Many LGBT voters shy away from the GOP and its typically anti-gay agenda, but for some gay voters, conservatism trumps gay rights. But why?

And will that continue if gay marriage again becomes a wedge issue in the presidential election?

The gay rights movement took a dramatic turn May 9 when President Barack Obama announced his support for same-sex unions.

“I think same-sex couples should be able to get married,” President Barack Obama said during an interview with ABC News’ Robin Roberts.

It was a welcome surprise for advocates of marriage equality. Obama had been “evolving” on the marriage issue for several years, but LGBT rights activists kept pressing the president for the evolution to complete.

Some had expected the president would change his position after the November election, when there was less political risk, but hardly anyone expected Obama to make such an announcement the day after North Carolina passed its constitutional amendment defining marriage as “a union between one man and one woman.”

Even before the marriage announcement, no president had done as much to advance the LGBT equality movement as Obama.

Since winning the 2008 election, Obama has signed into law a hate crimes bill that includes sexual orientation and gender identity.

He has pushed federal agencies to make their policies more LGBT-inclusive and ordered the

istock.com/MaryLB

By Ryan Watkins rwatkins@thegavoice.com

Justice Department to stop defending the antigay Defense of Marriage Act. The military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy is history.

How, then, can gay voters continue to justify voting for Republican candidates?

‘Greater principles than the fight for marriage’

GOProud is a national organization that advocates conservatism and gay inclusion in the Republican Party. Bruce Carroll, a GOProud boardmember and conservative blogger behind the website The Gay Patriot, told GA Voice in a recent telephone interview that despite the president’s work on LGBT issues, he would vote for former Mass. Gov. Mitt Romney, the likely Republican nominee, in the fall election.

For Carroll, gay issues like marriage aren’t the focus. Security and economic prosperity come first.

Carroll said that the terror attacks on 9/11, which killed a close friend, changed his perception of the importance of some political issues, including issues that affect him personally, like

same-sex marriage.

“I had a good friend who was on the plane that his the Pentagon,” Carroll said. “In addition to the national mourning we all went through, I had to go to a memorial ceremony for one of my closest friends. I came out of it thinking to myself, ‘there are people out there that will kill us for just having our constitution. There are greater principals than the fight for marriage.’”

Carroll said he respects the work Obama has done on gay rights during his term but also offered a harsh criticism of the way the president has handled the economy and foreign policy.

“I think it’s fair to say he’s done enough to warrant praise,” Carroll said. “He’s done enough to keep the gay community sending him checks.”

Romney, at least the 2012 Romney, is no friend to the gay rights movement. He’s gone from “I’ll be better than Ted [Kennedy] on gay rights” in 1994 to a full-fledged supporter of the anti-gay National Organization for Marriage.

“I can’t say I am enthusiastic,” Carroll said of the presumed nominee. “I doubt that Rom-

ney will take positions that are all that different from previous Republican candidates.”

Carroll said that acceptance for gays and lesbians would be a slow process, regardless of who was elected or what laws were enacted.

“It doesn’t matter what you do, you can’t legislate acceptance,” Carroll said. “We’re 50, 60 years out from the Civil Rights movement, and there are still people who don’t accept blacks in the same way they do whites.”

Still, Republican legislators are the ones who introduce federal laws like the Defense of Marriage Act, and constitutional amendments banning same-sex marriage and adoption bans at the state level —not Democrats, which makes justifying support for the GOP a tough sell for gay voters.

Carroll hopes to work within the Republican Party to advocate change toward gays and lesbians.

“My point in being a voice was to bridge people I know and care about on the conservative side with folks who I know and care about who are gay,” Carroll added.

News

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istock.com/MaryLB

?

It’s the economy, girl

Marriage equality has yet to be embraced by the Democratic Party as a whole, although there is a well-publicized petition calling on the Democratic National Committee to include marriage equality in its platform at this year’s DNC Convention in Charlotte.

Even some progressive Georgia politicians, like Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed and Athens Mayor Nancy Denson, personally oppose same-sex marriage, while supporting domestic partnership agreements or civil unions. (See story, Page 4) But why would LGBT voters go against their personal interests by embracing the GOP’s platform?

In short, money.

“It’s still a race about the economy,” said Dr. Andra Gillespie, associate professor of political science at Emory University.

“The debate about same-sex marriage was originally not going to play much of an issue in this race, but it’s happened now after Obama’s announcement,” Gillespie said.

Yet Gillespie said that gay Republican voters had already made up their minds about the election well before Obama’s same-sex marriage endorsement.

“They’ve known for a long time that the establishment in the party doesn’t support samesex marriage,” Gillespie said. “They’ve already reconciled their vote.”

Gillespie said that despite the prominent role the economy will play in the fall election, voters may be reminded of the candidates’ positions on gay rights, thanks to issue-specific Super PACs that operate outside of campaigns.

“It may not be from President Obama, it may not be from Mitt Romney,” Gillespie said. “Parties and candidates have less control of the message than ever before because this is the first presidential election where Super PACs are in play.”

Jamie Ensley, former chair of the Georgia Log Cabin Republicans and an Atlanta resident, said that he would not vote for Obama this fall, but added that he hoped Romney would back off gay issues.

“Are Democrats better on gay issues than Republicans? Of course they are,” Ensley said.

Ensley said he believes that the tide is turning and that within the next few years, the Republican Party will be forced to accept LGBT equality as it becomes a mainstream position.

“It’s going to take a couple of national elections and losses in the culture wars they’re fighting to see they’re going to have to change,” Ensley said.

Some Republicans, especially those who are most religious, will likely never embrace gay rights.

“The right-wing Republicans, you’re never going to change their minds,” Ensley continued. “Just move on, go to the ones whose minds you can change.”

Ensley said he believed fixing the country’s economic situation outweighs the gay rights movement.

“If you have equality, but you’re broke

May 25, 2012

GA Voice

7

fiscally-conservative liberal than a sociallyliberal conservative.

“I’m a moderate Republican, I have the best jobs plan, I’m pro-choice, support gay marriage and I want us out of Afghanistan now. If you’re not excited about Mitt Romney or the direction of the Republican Party, then I ask you to vote for me,” Karger says in the campaign ad.

The commercial has been viewed more than 50,000 times on YouTube and features an “parental advisory warning” and kiss between two men, likely the first-time two men have positively embraced in such a way in a presidential campaign ad.

“I wanted to, as I do with most of my commercials, deal with the fact that I’m an historic candidate,” Karger said. “I wanted to do a ground breaking commercial that included a gay kiss. As I do this, I’m also not taking off my civil rights hat, that’s what that’s about.”

‘Bring the Republican Party back to its roots’

Republican Fred Karger is the first openly gay man to run for president from a major political party. He made waves when a recent campaign video featuring bikini-clad girls and kissing boys went viral, but never got any serious attention within the party, and was not allowed to participate in televised debates. (Publicity photo)

and live in a third-world socialist country...”

Ensley said.

Are gays and lesbians even welcome in the GOP?

Romney was praised by gay conservatives earlier this year when he appointed openly gay Richard Grenell, a former Bush administration official, to serve as his spokesman on foreign policy. Gay conservatives hoped it would begin to heal the divide between the GOP and its gay constituents.

Grenell lasted just a week in the position before pressure from prominent social conservatives forced him to resign from the campaign.

Tony Perkins, president of the Family Research Council, wrote that he feared Grenell would advocate pro-LGBT policy abroad and dismissed his conservative credentials simply because he was a gay man.

“While past performance is not a guarantee of future results, there is strong evidence that Grenell would lobby for foreign policy more in line with the current administration than the last Republican one,” Perkins wrote on the FRC website.

Other social conservatives piled on the criticism and Grenell was gone just a few days later.

“He [Romney] caved in to the far right and didn’t support his staff member,” openly gay GOP presidential candidate Fred Karger told GA Voice in a recent phone interview. “Mitt Romney, as he started to move a little more to reach out and get LGBT support, really let us down.”

Karger, 62, is attempting to do what no openly gay man has done before: secure the Republican Party nomination for a fall run at the White House. Of course, his campaign was over before it ever began.

Yet, he presses on.

In a contest that’s seen many of the GOP’s current crop of stars rise and fall, many before a ballot was ever cast, Karger flew under the radar. So far under, in fact, he was never a consideration for the majority of the GOP’s primary voters and was not invited to participate in a single Republican debate.

That’s probably because Karger is not a typical Republican.

Karger told GA Voice that his focus is the California primary on June 5 and and the Utah primary on June 26, two contests where he hopes to have a strong showing among the state’s moderate Republican voters.

Karger has been campaigning heavily in California in the last few weeks. It’s his home state and likely the primary contest where he can claim the largest share of votes.

“Any vote I get is significant,” Karger said.

“It’s major to have someone vote for you for President of the United States.”

Karger has been handing out free frisbees, coordinated with a state-wide commercial called “Sexy Frisbee” that features several bikini-clad ladies and a few shirtless hunks playing beach games while he overlays his political positions, which make him sound more like a

When asked why a gay moderate with fiscal conservative views identifies as a Republican, Karger, like GOProud’s Carroll, said that he’s working toward changing the Republican Party from within.

“I’m trying to bring the Republican Party back to its roots,” he said. “There is a fine line in the two parties when we’re talking about moderates. I have moderate social views, but I believe in sound fiscal policy.”

Karger acknowledges that Romney, barring some kind of disaster, will be the GOP nominee come the fall. But he said he would have a hard time supporting Romney in the general election.

“Romney started out as a moderate,” Karger said. “He’s so driven to be president, he’ll say and do anything.”

At issue for Karger, Romney’s signature on a NOM anti-marriage pledge, where the former Massachusetts governor promises to fight against the spread of same-sex marriage should he win the presidency.

Romney, along with most of the other GOP contenders, signed the marriage pledge late last year. Karger, Rep. Ron Paul (R-Texas) and former Ambassador Jon Huntsman were among the handful of GOP contenders who did not sign the pledge.

“I’ve said that I cannot support a candidate who has signed and embraced a NOM pledge,” Karger said. “That’s just an affront to my community and to me. I’ve said they can endorse him, but he’s conversely endorsed them by signing that pledge.”

Karger gave President Obama credit for his accomplishments on LGBT issues, but said the president has failed the country with his economic policy — particularly the deficit — and must go.

“If Obama had seriously worked on the economy, that would have made a big difference.

Politicians are causing havoc that’s going to be left with your generation,” Karger said. “It’s going to be a very difficult hole to get out of.”

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Do not use EGRIFTA® if you: • have pituitary gland tumor, pituitary gland surgery, or other problems related to your pituitary gland • have active cancer (either newly diagnosed or recurrent) or are receiving treatment for cancer • are allergic to tesamorelin or any of the ingredients in EGRIFTA®. See the end of this leaflet for a complete list of ingredients in EGRIFTA® • are pregnant or become pregnant. If you become pregnant, stop using EGRIFTA® and talk with your healthcare provider. See “What should I tell my healthcare provider before using EGRIFTA®?”

What should I tell my healthcare provider before using EGRIFTA®?

Before using EGRIFTA®, tell your healthcare provider if you: • have or have had cancer • have diabetes • are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. It is not known if EGRIFTA® passes into your breast milk. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommends that HIV-infected mothers not breastfeed to avoid the risk of passing HIV infection to your baby. Talk with your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby if you are taking EGRIFTA® • have kidney or liver problems • have any other medical condition Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including prescription and nonprescription medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. EGRIFTA® may affect the way other medicines work, and other medicines may affect how EGRIFTA® works. Know the medicines you take. Keep a list with you to show your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine.

How should I use EGRIFTA®?

• Read the detailed “Instructions for Use” that comes with EGRIFTA® before you start using EGRIFTA®.

Your

healthcare provider will show you how to inject EGRIFTA® • Use EGRIFTA® exactly as prescribed by your healthcare provider • Inject EGRIFTA® under the skin (subcutaneously) of your stomach area (abdomen) • Change (rotate) the injection site on your stomach area (abdomen) with each dose. Do not inject EGRIFTA® into scar tissue, bruises, or your navel • Do not share needles or syringes with other people. Sharing of needles can result in the transmission of infectious diseases, such as HIV What are the possible side effects of EGRIFTA®?

EGRIFTA® may cause serious side effects including: • Serious allergic reaction. Some people taking EGRIFTA® may have an allergic reaction. Stop using EGRIFTA® and get emergency help right away if you have any of the following symptoms: – a rash over your body – hives – swelling of your face or throat – shortness of breath or trouble breathing – fast heartbeat – feeling of faintness or fainting

blood sugar periodically

General information about the safe and effective use of EGRIFTA®: Medicines are sometimes prescribed for purposes other than those listed in a Patient Information leaflet. Do not use EGRIFTA® for a condition for which it was not prescribed.

Do not give EGRIFTA® to other people, even if they have the same symptoms you have. It may harm them.

Do not share your EGRIFTA® syringe with another person, even if the needle is changed. Do not share your EGRIFTA® needles with another person.

This Patient Information leaflet summarizes the most important information about EGRIFTA®. If you would like more information, talk with your healthcare provider. You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for information about EGRIFTA® that is written for healthcare professionals.

For more information about EGRIFTA®, go to www.EGRIFTA.com or contact the AXIS Center toll-free at 1-877-714-2947.

What are the ingredients in EGRIFTA®?

Active ingredient: tesamorelin Inactive ingredients: mannitol and Sterile Water for Injection

© 2012 EMD Serono, Inc. 120120-161843 2/12 All rights reserved.

EGRIFTA® is a registered trademark of Theratechnologies Inc. Distributed by EMD Serono, Inc., Rockland, MA 02370

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May 25, 2012

GA Voice

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Coalition wants ‘no wedge’ between black voters, president over gay marriage Group hopes to counter anti-gay National Organization for Marriage

By Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com A new coalition of LGBT friendly churches and African-American organizations is coming together to combat efforts to drive a wedge between black voters and President Barack Obama in the 2012 election because the president now personally supports same-sex marriage.

Elder Antonio Jones, a gay pastor of Atlanta’s Unity Fellowship, said he and others including the National Black Justice Coalition have formed NoWedge2012.com specifically to start healthy dialogues with black Americans over the issue of marriage equality.

At the May 17 International Day Against Homophobia event held in Hapeville, Ga., Jones said the anti-gay National Organization for Marriage “wants to drive a wedge between the African-American community and the LGBT community.”

“We didn’t start the marriage fight. Usually the fight comes to us,” he said. “We have started NoWedge2012.com to conquer their campaign.”

In a phone interview, Jones said the No Wedge campaign doesn’t have as broad a base as NOM, but “we want to make sure we are on the radar.”

With Obama’s recent support of same-sex marriage and the NAACP also making a statement in support of marriage equality, Jones said he and others are trying to galvanize a crosssection of the LGBT and African American communities.

The goal is to send a message to NOM — and to those who voted for a constitutional amendment in North Carolina prohibiting same-sex marriage — that the African American community is a diverse group of people capable of supporting all civil rights, including same-sex marriage.

“We want to dispel that myth that the African American community has no tolerance,” he said.

But why does the black church face so much stigma when it comes to LGBT issues, when there are also plenty of white churches that preach hate against gay people?

“The reason the black church gets a bad rap is because it is very charismatic in how we deliver our messages,” Jones said. “Our messages tend to be more brazen than our white counterparts.”

Sharon Lettman-Hicks is executive director

of the National Black Justice Coalition, which works on LGBT issues. A No Wedge participant, Lettman-Hicks said it is time for “honest dialogue with black LGBT people.”

“Now our moral leadership has spoken,” she said. “It is time to start having healthy conversations.”

There is no doubt that NOM and others have co-opted the evangelical right, she added, but now is the time to get started on bringing more awareness of black LGBT people into the churches and into African-American communities themselves.

“We will not let them divide our community,” she said.

Jones preached at the IDAHO event that the black community is filled with diversity and that diversity will survive the attacks made by organizations such as NOM who wish to conquer and divide the black community through political strategies.

“I have great hope because I believe lies don’t live forever. Lies are founded in fear. And what is homophobia? Fear,” Jones said.

“We will not allow fear to defeat us. When the president let us know we do matter, we know our community has the ability to hold different positions. We ain’t going nowhere.

We’ve come to far to turn around. We going to stand until justice is served,” he said.

Elder Antonio Jones of Unity Fellowship Church speaks about No Wedge,’ a new coalition to combat efforts to divide the LGBT community and black community. (Photo by JD Harville)

MORE INFO www.theGAVoice.com No Wedge www.nowedge2012.com

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May 25, 2012

GA Voice

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Gay vs. gay-friendly races shape up for Ga. House ‘Painful’ election predicted as friends face off in newly redrawn districts

istock.com/MaryLB

By Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com State Reps. Rashad Taylor and Pat Gardner face off in the Democratic primary for the newly redrawn District 57 — and the results are likely to be painful to LGBT voters.

Political districts are redrawn every decade to reflect population changes. Republicans control the Georgia legislature, and thus controlled redistricting after the 2010 Census.

The entire General Assembly is up for election this year, and two of Georgia’s four openly gay state lawmakers were drawn into districts pitting two Democratic incumbents against each other.

In the new District 57, voters in the heavily gay area of Piedmont Heights and Midtown, as well as neighborhoods below I-20 including some of West End, will be forced to decide between an openly gay black man and a white woman and longtime LGBT ally seeking her 12th term.

“With Rashad and Pat, we have a very challenging race,” said Jeff Graham, executive director of Georgia Equality, the state’s largest LGBT advocacy organization.

Both have been endorsed by Georgia Equality in the past and the group stood by Taylor when he came out one year ago — May 22, 2011 — at the Phillip Rush Center after an ex-boyfriend threatened to out him to colleagues.

Being forced to decide between these two won’t be easy, Graham acknowledged.

“We have two people with proven track records. Certainly Pat has a long history and Rashad is one of only two gay black men in legislatures around the country,” Graham said.

Gardner and Taylor both said they are seeking the Georgia Equality endorsement, but Graham said a decision may not come for weeks or even a month.

The two incumbents consider each other friends and have worked closely in the legislature on many issues. But at the same time, each wants to win this race.

“The Republican redistricting is unfortunate for the city of Atlanta,” Taylor, vice chairman of the House Democratic Caucus, said at his recent campaign kickoff at the Commerce Club.

“A lot of neighborhoods have been divided.

Communities of interest have been divided. It makes it hard for us as candidates and for voters to understand,” he said.

Taylor said the redistricting seems to be racially motivated and his contest is the perfect example — a gay black man against a white progressive woman.

“But I hope people support me not just be-

State Reps. Rashad Taylor and Pat Gardner face each other in the Democratic primary on July 31. The two friends were drawn into the same district during the last session. Taylor is openly gay and Gardner is a longtime supporter of LGBT rights. (Photos by Dyana Bagby)

cause I’m gay,” he said. “I’ve worked hard on numerous issues. Pat [Gardner] has been an ally and a supporter of my leadership. We bonded in the House. It’s unfortunate to be running against a friend.”

At a recent fundraiser for another candidate, Gardner said the redistricting process was simply “painful.”

“I worked very hard to keep communities of interest together,” Gardner said. “They [Republicans] had another agenda. We believe in Atlanta that we are an inclusive society, not just black and white, but men and women, the whole gay community. Its really hard to find ourselves in this position where trying to make Democratic Party look less inclusive.

“He’s my friend. But I have some issues I care deeply about and in process of putting everything I have into this race,” she added.

Gardner, who voted against the 2004 state constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, has experience running against a gay candidate. That same year, current Atlanta City Council member Alex Wan challenged Gardner, but she won easily in the Democratic Primary.

“Alex [Wan] and I ran against each other and are now very close friends. He supports me in this campaign. It is my hope that the gay community realizes we need allies, gay people, as much as we can get for support,” Gardner said.

Early endorsements make waves

Georgia Equality has made early endorsements of four openly gay candidates for Georgia House: state Rep. Simone Bell, who faces ally Rep. Ralph Long in the newly redrawn District 58; Rep. Keisha Waites of District 60; Rep. Karla Drenner of District 86; and Ken Britt, a candidate

for the open seat of District 56.

“At this point in time we made four early endorsements where the decisions were very clear to us. We are supporting these incumbents and supporting Ken Britt who helped form the organization [of Georgia Equality]. These are people who have worked and will be able to advance our legislative agenda. And Ken has worked at the Capitol to help us do that,” Graham said.

Britt volunteered as a lobbyist for Georgia Equality last legislative session on HB 630, the Georgia Fair Employment Practices Bill. But he does have an opponent — “Able” Mable Thomas, a former state representative who also challenged U.S. Rep. John Lewis.

When reached by phone and asked for an interview about the campaign, Thomas said she wanted “equal time” for the coverage GA Voice has given to Britt, including two stand-alone stories about her, before promising to send an announcement about her campaign and then hanging up the phone.

The first GA Voice article was about Britt’s campaign announcement and was before Thomas entered the race. The second article was about Georgia Equality announcing early endorsements.

The GA Voice received a text message Tuesday, May 22, saying Thomas was holding a fundraiser at the Capital on Wednesday, May 23.

In an interview with the website Atlanta Progressive News and her friend editor Matthew Cardinale, Thomas said she was disappointed Georgia Equality did not consider endorsing her.

“I’m a little sad they’ve gone so quickly to endorse [Britt] without looking at the record and seeing I’m a consistent strong vote to ensure the rights of the LGBT community are respected,” Thomas said.

Long, expressed disappointment and even anger that Georgia Equality did not consider him for an endorsement before giving its nod to Bell in the new District 58. Bell made history when she was elected in 2009 and became the first out AfricanAmerican lesbian elected to a state legislature.

“I just want a fair chance,” said Long, who is a co-sponsor of a hate crimes bill in the House sponsored by Taylor and also of the state Fair Employment Practices Act sponsored by Drenner.

“I’ve never voted to discriminate against anyone. My feelings are hurt [about the endorsement]. The LGBT community has some straight allies and if we want equality we have to want equality for all. Having a straight candidate that represents their issues gives constituents a larger plate at the table,” he said. “I’ve had doors closed in my face because I’m not gay.”

For Bell, who said she has nothing bad to say about her colleague Long, the major opposition in her race is the map.

“The map is the challenge, not my opponent,” Bell said during a May 12 meeting of the LGBT Caucus of the Democratic Party. “But I’m going to win.”

Bell also made it clear that she represents all constituents — whether it comes to healthcare, women’s issues, poverty and education.

“It’s important I go back because as an out lesbian I fight for a woman’s right if she wants to or doesn’t want to have an abortion,” she said. “If I am fighting for women’s rights, I know I’m fighting for lesbian rights.”

Other gay incumbents

Drenner, who was Georgia’s first openly gay state legislator and is currently serving her sixth term, didn’t have an announced opponent at press time. The official candidate qualifying period is May 23-25, with the primary set for July 31.

“My job I believe is to not only help Democrats get elected but to ensure LGBT candidates get elected,” Drenner said.

Rep. Keisha Waites, who won a special election Feb. 7 for the District 60 seat, said she was thrilled to receive Georgia Equality’s endorsement. She hopes she faces no opponent, but said she is sticking to her grassroots campaign of walking neighborhoods and especially working with children in her district’s public schools.

“We hit the ground running since I was sworn in and I plan to work for the people,” she said.

Graham of Georgia Equality hopes the redistricting process does not divide progressive voters, who are already outnumbered in Georgia politics.

“I hope the progressive community as a whole does not fall in the trap of beating up each other because of race, class and sexual orientation,” Graham said. “This year is going to be very painful for a lot of people.

“I hope the leaders in our community can keep one eye on this election cycle and another eye on working together in the future to bring equity and fairness to Georgia,” he said.

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May 25, 2012

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Governor changes Day Against Homophobia to Mistreatment Awareness Day Event promoted sexual diversity in the workplace

By Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com Atlanta celebrated the International Day Against Homophobia in Hapeville, Ga., at the affirming Village Church — taking the May 17 event out of the safe LGBT bubble of Atlanta to areas where more education about LGBT issues is needed, said Betty Couvertier, IDAHO organizer.

The keynote speaker this year was Vandy Beth Glenn, the transgender woman who sued the state in federal court after she was fired from her job as a legislative editor when she informed her boss she was transitioning from male to female. Her case made it all the way to the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals where she won in a unanimous ruling from a three-member panel and got her job back.

Glenn talked about how the world was changing for the better, especially for LGBT people, noting that in Georgia there are currently four openly state legislators.

“It’s a great time to be lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender,” she said.

Also speaking was Melissa Carter, columnist for the GA Voice and Huffington Post as well as

Atlanta IDAHO organizer Betty Couvertier reads the ‘Mistreatment Awareness Day’ proclamation from Gov. Nathan Deal’s office on May 17. (Photo by JD Harville)

former co-host of the popular Q100 Bert Show.

She praised President Barack Obama for publicly coming out in support of same-sex marriage.

“The majority of people out there are followers. Sometimes you have to be a leader,” Carter said. “You are just fine the way you are. Don’t be discouraged. Have hope. Don’t doubt yourself.”

Proclamations from the full Atlanta City Council and Fulton County Commission were presented at the event to honor May 17 as In-

ternational Day Against Homophobia. State Rep. Keisha Waites (D-Atlanta) also presented a proclamation she issued honoring the day.

But Couvertier also asked for a proclamation from the office of Georgia Gov. Nathan Deal. She received one, but it had been renamed “Mistreatment Awareness Day.” Couvertier said she was shocked when she received the proclamation that renamed an international event and received no answers

from the governor’s office as to why the name was changed.

During his Republican campaign for governor, Deal would not support gay adoptions, would not support taxpayer-funded domestic partner benefits, and said he would fight to uphold Georgia’s constitutional amendment that defines marriage as between one man, one woman.

The proclamation from the governor never mentions homophobia, sexual orientation or gender identity.

“The State of Georgia does not tolerate the criminal mistreatment of its citizens in any way, shape, or form. Whether it is bullying on the playground, harassment in the workplace, or general mental and physical abuse, our state is one that will see that individuals who act against the law are held accountable for their behavior,” the proclamation states.

It concludes: “Mistreatment Awareness Day is an opportunity to observe those who have suffered through any form of violence and to recognize those who campaign to raise awareness on this issue.”

“They couldn’t even use the word homophobia,” Couvertier said. “This [proclamation] is a documentation of homophobia.”

Couvertier promised to keep asking the governor for proclamations seeking recognition of the event in future years.

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Atlanta Police LGBT Advisory Board seeks new members Three seats are open on the Atlanta Police Department’s LGBT Advisory Board after twoyear terms expired.

The board, founded in 2010 by Mayor Kasim Reed during the fallout of the unconstitutional Atlanta Eagle raid, allows two-year terms for members.

Those not seeking to renew their terms are Terence McPhaul, executive director of YouthPride; Betty Couvertier, radio host for Alternative Perspectives; and Ebonee Bradford Barnes, who has been absent for four meetings.

Those who wish to remain on the board are current chairperson Glen Paul Freedman; Josh Noblitt of St. Mark United Methodist Church; AID Atlanta Executive Director Tracy Elliott; Melissa Carter; and Philip Rafshoon.

The openings were discussed at the board meeting held Monday, May 21.

Those wishing to apply for the position must undergo a background check conducted by the

LGBT liaisons and fill out an application.

The board is seeking diversity including transgender people, people of color and lesbians. For information, email Freedman at glenfreedman@thelmbgroup.com.

At the board meeting on May 21, members present also thanked Senior Patrol Officer Patricia Powell who stepped down as LGBT liaison and is now working on recruitment of officers.

“She came in at a rough time after the Eagle raid and handled herself in a professional manner and helped the community heal,” said Elliott.

Officer Kristin Knight recently replaced Powell as the new LGBT liaison and serves in the position with Officer Brian Sharp.

Knight and Sharp will attend a conference for LGBT people working in law enforcement beginning May 28. An advisory board meeting is being planned for June to hear about what the officers learned at the conference, Freedman said.

Sharp also reported to the board that he con-

Glen Paul Freedman, chair of the Atlanta Police LGBT Advisory Board, said the board is currently seeking three new members. (Photo by Dyana Bagby)

ducted training for vice officers who conduct sting operations of prostitutes who are crossdressers and transsexuals.

— Dyana Bagby

Police: Despite TV reports, no increased violence among crossdressing prostitutes in Midtown

Pro-gay rugby star Ben Cohen to attend ATL screening of ‘Legalize Gay’ documentary

Atlanta television stations 11Alive and WSB-TV aired sensational segments May 16 claiming cross-dressing and “transvestite” prostitutes were terrorizing residents living in Midtown. The commander of the Atlanta Police Department’s vice unit told GA Voice the stories are not true.

The neighborhood in question is Piedmont Avenue and 3rd Street as well as Myrtle Street.

Both stations interviewed residents of the area who alleged there were prostitute gangs as well as prostitutes approaching residents and threatening them.

“Ten or twelve prostitutes standing in the streets waving at cars, shaking their booty, wearing prostitute clothes,” resident Michael Orloff told 11Alive. “There are times when the prostitutes actually get into arguments amongst themselves over a john.”

And on WSB-TV, Graham Balch, who also ran for state senate in 2010, said prostitutes have confronted him “on several occasions.”

“I have experienced some who are very aggressive to me. Who swore at me, came after me,” Balch said.

Lt. Scott Kreher, commander of the vice unit for the APD, said there is no evidence of prostitute gangs or increased violence.

“I’m not really sure why it was reported like that,” he said in an interview. “There is no more violence there than in any other part of the city, whether female or male prostitutes.

“There has been no evidence any increased violence,” he added. “And we’ve done details there as much as any other part of the city. We don’t see any evidence of pimp or prostitute gangs.”

When residents approach prostitutes, how-

Ben Cohen, a U.K. rugby star athlete and founder of the Atlanta-based to combat bullying and homophobia in sports, will be in Atlanta June 11 for a screening of “Legalize Gay” as part of Atlanta Pride’s Stonewall month of events.

The screening is a collaboration of the StandUp Foundation, Atlanta Pride Committee and Out on Film, Atlanta’s LGBT film fest where “Legalize Gay” had its world premiere last year. It is also a fundraiser for all three groups, with tickets priced at $15.

A Q&A with Cohen will take place after the movie screening, which is set for 7:30 p.m. at Midtown Art Cinema.

Cohen is the first straight sports star to focus his philanthropic efforts on LGBT causes.

He and his foundation are profiled in “Legalize Gay” along with Spelman University alumna Jeshawna Wholley, who organized the first Pride event at the historically black college and was later invited to meet President Barack Obama; and Danny Hernandez, the gay intern credited for saving the life Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords.

The Stonewall month screening of “Legalize Gay” is a fundraiser for Cohen’s StandUp Foundation, the Atlanta Pride Committee and Out On Film.

— Dyana Bagby

Graham Balch, who ran for state senate in 2010, told WSB-TV he has been confronted by ‘very aggressive’ transgender prostitutes ‘on several occasions.’ (Photo via Facebook)

ever, there may be issues, Kreher said. “[T]he only violence I see is when citizens approach the prostitutes and are trying to challenge them,” he said. “I don’t see it [violence] any other way.”

The APD makes sweeps in areas know for prostitution in the summer months, Kreher noted, including Midtown.

He said there is no evidence of “prostitute gangs” and that prostitutes do typically travel in pairs for safety reasons.

When asked if these prostitutes were transsexual or transgender women, Kreher said they were men who dressed as women.

“They are mostly men dressed as women, not transsexuals or transgender,” he said, adding that LGBT liaison Officer Brian Sharp often accompanies the vice unit on details and trains the officers on transgender issues.

The word “transvestite” is also considered a slur by the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation.

— Dyana Bagby

MORE INFO www.theGAVoice.com ‘Legalize Gay’ screening Monday, June 11, 7:30 p.m.

Midtown Art Cinema 931 Monroe Dr. , Atlanta, GA 30308 http://legalizegayatlanta.eventbrite.com

May 25, 2012

GA Voice

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GA Voice

May 25, 2012

Voices

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Editor: Laura Douglas-Brown lbrown@thegavoice.com Deputy Editor: Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com Web Manager: Ryan Watkins rwatkins@thegavoice.com Art Director: Bo Shell bshell@thegavoice.com Contributors: Melissa Carter, Brent Corcoran, Jim Farmer, Shannon Hames, Topher Payne, Mike Ritter, Matt Schafer, Steve Warren, Justin Ziegler

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VOICES OPINION & REACTION

Stop ‘wrestling’ and start ‘evolving’

An open letter to Mayor Kasim Reed on marriage equality Editorial by Laura Douglas-Brown lbrown@thegavoice.com Dear Mayor Reed, Not quite three years ago, in November 2009, you and I sat across a conference room table in the office of the weekly gay newspaper where I served as editor. You were there to interview for our endorsement in the Atlanta mayoral election.

Your opponent in the race, Mary Norwood, had sat at the same table, for the same reason. She supported same-sex couples’ right to marry. You did not. You chalked it up to your personal religious beliefs, but couldn’t really explain why — given the separation of church and state — religious beliefs should play a role in setting public policy.

We didn’t endorse you, but we didn’t endorse Ms. Norwood either. The newspaper locked its doors and filed for bankruptcy without publishing another issue. You went on to win the election, but you lost District 6, home to Atlanta’s gayest neighborhoods, by a wide margin.

A little over a year later, you and I sat down again, this time in your office at City Hall. It was March 2010, and I was there to interview you for an article in the new LGBT newspaper we had just launched, GA Voice. This time, you brought up gay marriage first.

You hadn’t changed your position, but it was clear you were still smarting from the gay voters who had flocked to Norwood during the election — despite your support for gay rights while you served in the Georgia legislature, which included serving as the House sponsor of a hate crime law that was later struck down for being too vague, and trying to stop passage of the bill that put a state constitutional amendment banning gay marriage on the ballot in 2004.

Some critics had said you refused to support gay marriage for political reasons, that you had aspirations to higher office. You insisted repeatedly that your opposition was “genuine” and “heartfelt,” a belief for which you were “willing to risk an election.”

Somehow, that didn’t make me feel any better.

The problem, Mayor Reed, is that your stand on gay marriage just doesn’t make sense.

Neither did President Obama’s before May 9.

That’s why critics thought his stand was purely political, and that’s why many still think that about you.

“I believe in absolute full legal equality, I believe that gay and lesbian couples should have every right and benefit that married couples have, but I do have a reservation where it comes to marriage,” you told me back in that 2010 interview.

But if you truly believe in full equality, why not call it marriage? Because the fact is that alternative legal statuses like civil unions do not grant the full rights, or the full respect, as marriage.

The California Supreme Court explained this better than I ever could, though the point is so obvious it is hard to believe it needs explaining: “Retaining the designation of marriage exclusively for opposite-sex couples and providing only a separate and distinct designation for same-sex couples may well have the effect of perpetuating a more general premise … that gay individuals and same-sex couples are in some respects ‘second-class citizens’ who may, under the law, be treated differently from, and less favorably than, heterosexual individuals or opposite-sex couples.”

And if you are afraid that being pro-gay marriage will hurt your future electability, you can cross that off your list of concerns.

President Obama’s announcement was groundbreaking for many reasons, the most important being that it affirmed the basic equality of all Americans. But it also gave cover to basically every other politician in the country.

Really, think about it. Being opposed to marriage equality actually hurt you in the 2009 mayor’s race. It could hurt you again if you seek re-election next year.

You have already served in the Georgia House and Senate, so you aren’t going back there. If you ran for Congress, it would be in a Democratic Atlanta-based district, and supporting gay marriage won’t hurt you. U.S. Rep. John Lewis (D-Atlanta) already supports gay marriage; should he decide one day to retire, voters in his district wouldn’t hold it against you.

Running for an office elected statewide, like governor or U.S. senator, would be a long shot for you already. Sadly, Democrats aren’t winning statewide races these days, and even more sadly, Georgia has never had an AfricanAmerican governor or U.S. senator. That’s not to say it couldn’t happen, but supporting gay

marriage would hardly be the biggest obstacle you would face.

On the list of future political options for you, that leaves being appointed to federal office. But that will only happen if a Democrat is in the White House. And the Democrat presidential nominee is Barack Obama. And he, of course, supports gay marriage.

Do you see where I am going with this?

You might wonder why we care. Mayors don’t pass marriage laws, which are set at the state level. And Georgia is nowhere close to legalizing gay marriage.

That is, of course, exactly why your support matters. Elected officials wield the power of the bully pulpit, garnering the visibility and respect to influence all kinds of issues where they don’t directly set policy.

To that end, Freedom to Marry launched the Mayors for the Freedom to Marry project, which now includes more than 200 mayors.

They represent cities large and small, including Southern cities like Tallahassee, Fla., and Chapel Hill, N.C. “We stand for the freedom to marry because it enhances the economic competitiveness of our communities, improves the lives of families that call our cities home, and is simply the right thing to do,” reads the pledge from the mayors.

Mayor Reed, as these other mayors know, marriage equality has become the new litmus test to judge whether someone is truly committed to lesbian and gay rights. Even those in our community who don’t think it should be first on the proverbial “gay agenda” don’t like you when you say we should be denied that right.

It isn’t just President Obama who has “evolved” on gay issues. The whole country has evolved. You sponsored the state hate crimes bill in 2000. That was a courageous stand — back then.

The same year you helped fight the marriage amendment here in Georgia, Massachusetts became the first state to legalize gay marriage.

Now there are eight states, plus the District of Columbia, though laws passed in two states haven’t taken effect yet and could still be turned back by bigoted amendments.

Still, polls show about 50 percent of Americans now support marriage equality, and as of May 9, so does the president of the United States.

If you continue “wrestling” with this issue much longer, you won’t be an ally — you’ll be an anachronism.

May 25, 2012

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#1: Supper club for the husband-hungry A desperate foodie begins his search for a mate in Atlanta’s restaurant world Editor’s note: Food Porn is a new fictional series by longtime Atlanta food critic Cliff Bostock. Set in real Atlanta restaurants, it chronicles the adventures of Robert, a gay man in search of a husband — or at least a good meal.

Robert Lingston, a longtime resident of Midtown Atlanta, dipped his napkin in his water glass and rubbed a dribble of a garlic-laden sauce off his red polo shirt. He looked across the table at his friend Janet and sighed.

“I’m having a midlife crisis,” he said, looking around the room. He pushed each sleeve of his shirt up to better reveal his biceps. “I really am.”

“Isn’t this like your second or third midlife crisis?” Janet asked.

They were at Pura Vida in Poncey-Highland.

Robert, a dedicated but gym-compulsive foodie, loved Chef Hector Santiago’s tapas. His favorite was the Puerto-Rican classic, mofongo – mashed plantains, carnitas and bits of pork cracklings.

Pura Vida was always crowded and noisy.

Like most restaurants that serve small plates, its initial impression was inexpensive. As soon as you started multiplying the plates and fancy cocktails, though, the bill could zoom upward.

“I need a husband,” Robert said. “I’m 49.

I’m like a grocery-store price. At 49, I might as well be 50 – the end of everything. I’m too old for shirtless bowling and every time I hook up, guys call me ‘Daddy.’ It’s like the anti-Viagra.”

“Maybe you should shave the scruff, sweetheart,” Janet replied, tipsy enough to be truthful. “It looks okay on a lot of young guys, but at some point it ages you.”

Robert massaged his cheeks and looked at his hands to see if the Grecian Formula was rubbing off.

“Maybe you’re right,” he said, “but it’s the big fetish now, so it matters more than anything else. By analogy, if your penis is gigantic, it doesn’t matter at 2 in the horny morning online if you look like a flesh-eating zombie. Nor does it matter if your hook-up says, ‘Here, put on this grocery bag.’ ” “Actually,” Janet said, “you’re the opposite.

You’re too damn picky – the same way you are about food.”

Robert laughed. He licked a dab of tamarind sauce from a finger. It accompanied the steamed coconut buns with slightly sweet, smoked pork belly.

“So what is your plan?” Janet asked.

“I don’t have a plan. It’s impossible to meet eligible men in this city. I don’t want to go to bars.

I’m over the online thing. I even went to church

the last three Sundays. I’ve met more interesting men standing at a urinal at Home Depot.”

“Maybe you need to get a little kinky,” Janet suggested. “Maybe you need to introduce food into your sex and love life. You know – food porn.”

She was making a joke, but Robert’s eyes narrowed. His mind was whirring. So-called underground supper clubs were all the rage now. What if he started a gay food-porn dinner club? He could host dinners at various restaurants or invite chefs to secret locations.

Everyone was doing it. Why not him? ******** Robert was excited, but he worried about people’s reaction. As an English professor at Georgia State, he specialized in queer theory and knew that people sometimes found his ideas uncomfortably radical.

He decided to discuss the supper club with his regular Friday dining companion, Jimmy, who was 10 years younger than Robert. They had been dining at the Colonnade together for nearly 15 years.

Robert invited Ralph to join them. He was a 27-year-old hair-stylist who helped Robert disguise his thinning blond hair and ripped the hair off his back every couple of weeks after dripping hot wax on him. Ralph had the clone look down: florid tattoos, buzz cut, patches of scruff, neon-green shoe laces.

“I hope you can handle this,” Robert said to Ralph, as he snatched a yeast roll from the bread basket and dug into his favorite wedge of iceberg lettuce with blue cheese dressing. “This

Recommended Pura Vida, 656 N. Highland Ave., 404870-9797, www.puravidatapas.com. (Best choices: the mofongo, steamed coconut buns, anything on the menu.)

The Colonnade, 1879 Cheshire Bridge Bridge Rd., 404-874-5642, www.colonnadeatl.com. (Best choices: wedge of lettuce with blue cheese dressing, fried chicken, turnip greens.)

Uncle Julio’s, 1860 Peachtree Rd., 404350-6767, www.unclejulios.com. (Best choices: Waiting for a table.)

HD1, 1664 N. Highland Ave., 404-815-1127, www.hd1restaurant.com. (Good choices: the Merguez, the Bratwurst, the Classic.) is a mature scene for you.”

The Colonnade was once renowned for its mix of gay men and 80-year-old Southern belles who sat at tables twirling ringlets of blue hair while sipping cocktails between deep inhalations from portable oxygen tanks.

But most of the widows moved on to the Bingo Parlor in the Sky. Lunch was discontinued. Aging gay men still showed up, but younger guys found new places to hang out Fridays, like Uncle Julio’s (formerly Casa Grande), where the crowded, margarita-drenched wait for a table provided involuntary frottage, often better than the food.

“So, I don’t get this idea,” Jimmy said.

“And I have no idea what food porn is,” Ralph said.

“Generally,” Robert said, “it refers to the way cooking shows, dining reviews and photography depict food in gastronomically lascivious terms.

The depictions cause hunger as effectively as porn gets you hard. It’s all about desire.”

“Okay,” Ralph said, averting his eyes from a man who shuffled by in a cloud of Aramis, staring at him intensely. “But how do you work this into dinner?”

Before he could answer, dinner arrived — a mountain of hot crispy fried chicken with turnip greens for Robert. Although a major foodie, Robert was as ruled by nostalgia as any other person. The chicken, which he regarded as the city’s best, always reminded him of growing up in Savannah.

“It’s just for fun,” Robert explained. “Men in Atlanta take sex far too seriously. It’s valid as recreation. Hell, it can be performance art – with or without an a audience.”

Jimmy took a bite of his favorite turkey and dressing and stared at Robert. “You know,” he said, “a lot of people are gonna think you’re nuts if you do this.”

Robert sighed.

“I do think it’s nuts,” Ralph said. “It’s like all those guys in leather diapers humping drag queens in Gay Pride parades. It just makes all of us look so bad. And here you are talking about — I don’t know — naked men serving oversized hot dogs from HD1.”

Robert frowned. “I think HD1 is great fun but I’m not that crazy about all of their hot dogs,” he said about the restaurant started by Top Chef Richard Blais. “Some of the dogs — sausages, really — are a little too baroque. They pile too many toppings on one small piece of meat, so to speak. Nobody likes a small piece of meat that tastes weird. But, if you pare the toppings down, you get some great flavor.”

Ralph and Jimmy looked at one another.

“You really don’t get it, do you?” Jimmy asked.

“I get it,” Robert said, drumming his fingers.

“It’s my job to maintain a proper image of gay men. It’s like the guys who got arrested at LA Fitness a few years back because they played around in the sauna. Everyone said they were an embarrassment to the entire community.

Gay men can be amazingly prudish whores.”

“It’s your thing,” Jimmy said. “I’d go. I think it will be fun, if the police don’t raid it because of lewd eating.”

“Too out there for me,” Ralph said.

“Honestly, Ralph,” Robert replied, “I think treating sex and romance this way defuses its intimidation factor. It’s not a literal sex party, but a chance to meet adventurous, interesting men. In any case, I’m doing it to find a husband.”

“You are seriously deranged,” Ralph said.

“Thank you,” Robert replied. “I just want to bring good food out of the closet.”

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May 25, 2012

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BOOKS

May 25, 2012

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by Gregg Shapiro

‘Mother’ lode Alison Bechdel gained legions of fans with her syndicated comic strip “Dykes to Watch Out For,” known for its mix of personal relationships and political issues, before turning her pen to even more overtly personal topics.

Her celebrated first graphic novel, “Fun Home,” published in 2006, focused on Bechdel’s relationship with her father, including his gay affairs during his marriage to her mother. Now, Bechdel uses her formidable storytelling and illustration skills to explore her relationship with her mother in her new graphic memoir, “Are You My Mother?”

GA Voice: Your previous book “Fun Home” plays a considerable role in your new book, “Are You My Mother?” Were you prepared for reception that the first book received?

Alison Bechdel: No! I think, in a way this new memoir is kind of my own working out of what happened with “Fun Home.” It was surprisingly, almost freakishly, successful. I was not prepared for that.

Therapy and therapists are central figures in “Are You My Mother?” and, as you said, this new book helped you work out that experience. But do you ever consider writing, drawing and making art in general to be an extension of therapy?

I guess I do. I feel like I have such an odd life where my work is about my life. That was even true, to a certain extent, when I was drawing my comic strip “Dykes To Watch Out For,” where I was writing about the daily life I was

living in the lesbian subculture.

Now I’ve gone further inward. My job is writing about my life, almost everything I do, including therapy, including my work. Everything just blends together in this sometimes confusing but mostly organic way.

Each chapter of “Are You My Mother?” begins with a dream. Was it always your intention to begin them that way?

That happened pretty late in my process.

Even then I was kind of resistant to it, because it is sort of inexcusable to belabor people with one’s dreams. You’re not supposed to even talk about your dreams, let alone put them in a book.

I feel like they were the chronological key to the story. This book about my mother jumps around in time and in space so much that I felt like it needed some kind of spine or backbone. For me that was the sequence of dreams that I had in the process of writing the memoir about my dad. Those dreams happened in chronological order and I keep them in that order in the book as a kind of touchstone.

In chapter four you write about Dr. Seuss’ “Sleep Book. ” P.D. Eastman’s “Are You My Mother?” — from Dr. Seuss’s “I can read it myself” series — also plays a role in your new book. As both an illustrator and a writer, how much influence would you say that Theodore Geisel had on you?

Dr. Seuss was a huge influence. I loved all of his books as a kid. Strangely though, I read the P. D. Eastman book as a kid, but it wasn’t

Photo by Elen Seibert

Lesbian artist, author Alison Bechdel mines maternal relations in new graphic novel

[laughs] that pivotal for me. I didn’t click with that book. But I just loved Dr. Seuss. He was crazy!

Other writers, including Virginia Woolf and the recently deceased lesbian poet Adrienne Rich, figure prominently in the book. As someone who, like Dr. Seuss, both writes and illustrates, and even though drawing is still an essential part of the work, would you personally say that you identify more as a writer or an illustrator?

That’s a very interesting question. I want to argue that I am both equally. But the truth is I do think that I am more of writer than a drawer.

I think the drawing is a little more in service to the writing then vice versa.

That balance varies a lot for different criteria. Sometimes the words have a little more

Lesbian illustrator/author Alison Bechdel explores her complicated relationship with her mother in her new graphic memoir, ‘Are You My Mother?’

(Excerpted from ‘Are You My Mother?’ by Alison Bechdel. Copyright © 2012 by Alison Bechdel.

Used by permission of Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. All rights reserved.)

primacy. Others are more driven by the images.

We all want to think that it’s a completely inextricable balance and it is inextricable for me.

Sometimes I feel like a crypto-writer, that I became a cartoonist as a way of being a writer that wouldn’t annoy or challenge my mother.

Have thought about your next project?

Yes, I have. I’m still excited about memoir and I have a lot more to say about my family. I need to sit down and talk with them about this, but I want to keep writing about my wacky family.

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Down the rabbit hole Revisionist ‘Alice in Wonderland’ has outsider appeal

MORE INFO www.theGAVoice.com ‘Alice in Wonderland’ June 1 – July 28 at Serenbe Playhouse 9110 Selborne Lane Chattahoochee Hills, GA 30268 www.serenbeplayhouse.com ‘Jersey Boys’ Through June 10 at the Fox Theatre 660 Peachtree St NE, Atlanta, GA 30308 www.JerseyBoysTour.com story, about how the events she faces gives her both self-empowerment and confidence.

“We can all relate to this. I think Alice wants to be a tomboy — who can’t identify with the idea of parents trying to making their children into something they are not?”

The director was open to casting an adult in the lead role but came across young Skylar Nicholson, who has a TV career on her own,

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stead, with the main character coming in and out of the water. He staged that show as a result of all the bullying that had been going on locally and nationally.

If there’s a theme to this season, it’s about dreams.

“Alice is left to wonder – was this real or all just a dream,” Clowdus says.

Following “Alice in Wonderland” will be William Shakespeare’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” and then the gay-themed “Time Between Us,” a regional premiere by Brett Schrier which will star Clowdus.

THEATER by Jim Farmer

As Brian Clowdus prepares to open his new summer season at Serenbe Playhouse next week, the openly gay artistic director of the troupe is particularly proud of the new take on “Alice in Wonderland” his company is unveiling. He promises a version of the classic that audiences have never seen.

Based on the Lewis Carroll story, Rachel Teagle’s revisionist version retains the central characters but throws a curve into the action. Here, young Alice comes across a band of actors in her journey, all wearing masks, and she becomes the main character in a story that they dream up. Part of what Clowdus and Teagle wanted to do with this new take was to make Alice less passive in the story – and give her more to do.

Clowdus feels gay and lesbian audiences in particular can relate to the lead character. He feels the character of Alice is very much an outsider.

“She is beautiful, gorgeous, but she doesn’t know that,” he says. “She has no friends. She just doesn’t fit in with others and has no belief in herself. This is very much her coming of age

May 25, 2012

‘Jersey Boys’ returns to ATL

Skylar Nicholson stars as Alice in Serenbe Playhouse’s revision visit to Wonderland. (Photo courtesy Serenbe Playhouse)

and knew she was his Alice.

The two actors who play the characters of Tweedledee and Tweedledum are both gay, says Clowdus, and he calls those two characters somewhat flamboyant.

Clowdus started his company in 2009 and this is the third season. Last year he presented “The Ugly Ducking,” another revisionist take on a classic. This time the stage was a lake in-

The Broadway Across America 2011-2102 season is ending with “Jersey Boys,” the crowd favorite that won a 2006 Tony for Best Musical.

Its first Atlanta engagement was very successful so it has returned for a multi-week run.

The story of Frankie Vallie and the formation of the band Four Seasons not only has a lot of terrific music (“Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “Sherry, “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” and many more) but has a gay theme as well. The unofficial fifth member of the band was Bob Crewe, who wrote much of the music alongside Bob Gaudio, and served as the band’s manager as well.

Crewe was openly gay, a rarity in the rock and roll industry then, and his band mates had no problem at all with him or his male partners.

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Picture perfect ‘Good Cotillion Belles’ Atlanta Cotillion Kickoff

Photos by Dyana Bagby

Atlanta Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Give Back

‘Good Cotillion Belles’ Atlanta Cotillion Kickoff

Photos by Brent Corcoran/RNZ Photography

Photos by Dyana Bagby

Doggies on the Catwalk

May 25, 2012

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The early days of AID Atlanta HIV organization ‘Honors’ its founders at June 14 gala

By Ryan Lee One weekend during the summer of 1982, Peter Aliberti went to an apartment complex near Monroe Drive and Dutch Valley Road to lounge poolside with a group of friends, and he wound up leaving as part of a group of prophets.

“I’ll never forget that day because it was the day that everything changed,” Aliberti recalled during a recent interview in Midtown. “We were just kids – we were in our late twenties, early thirties. We’d go there every Saturday and Sunday and be silly, lie in the sun, drink cocktails, whatever.”

The typically lighthearted banter between Aliberti and his friends turned frightening on this particular day, as the men shared news they were hearing from friends in New York and San Francisco about gay men in those cities suddenly dying of a mysterious disease.

“The initial conversation was kind of disbelief: ‘There’s no such thing as gay cancer, it’s not possible,’” Aliberti said. “And a little bit of shock: ‘Oh my god, is this for real?’ It was pretty much decided that afternoon that we needed to do something.”

Graham Bruton had been the social coordinator for this group of friends, planning card games and lake outings. Now he was leading gay Atlanta’s grassroots response to the disease that would soon be known as AIDS. “He was full of energy all the time,” Aliberti said. “Graham immediately sent off to New York and got a lot of pamphlets and brochures from [the Gay Men’s Health Crisis], and Graham really coordinated all of that.”

Bruton became the president of the new organization — AID Atlanta — that the friends had started to raise awareness about the new disease, with Aliberti serving as vice president.

“Graham was always a visionary,” said Mary Jenks, another founding member of AID Atlanta. “He was always trying to figure out what the next step would be, and look way ahead to see where things needed to go.”

As the organization marks its 30th anniversary this year, it will show its appreciation to its founders at the AID Atlanta Honors party,

Left: Among those being celebrated June 14 at AID Atlanta Honors are the CDC’s Dr. Kevin Fenton (National Honors) and the founders of AID Atlanta (Community Honors). The founders include (pictured right) Graham Bruton, Brian Clark, Peter Aliberti and Mary Jenks. (Fenton photo courtesy CDC; founders photo courtesy Mary Jenks)

slated for June 14 at Schwartz-Goldstein Hall at The Temple. Tickets begin at $35 for the gala evening of awards and celebration, with higher donor levels available.

The founders of AID Atlanta will receive the “Georgia Honors” that evening. The event also recognizes the contributions of Kevin Fenton, director of the HIV/AIDS division at the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (National Honors), as well the employees of Gap Inc. (Community Honors), Autotrader.com (Corporate Honors), and Tom Roeck, former chief financial officer of Delta (Kenneth F. Britt Service Award).

‘No one had ever heard of safe sex’

Aliberti recently visited AID Atlanta’s offices for the first time in years, and was amazed by the size of the organization and the scope of services provided. The founders of AID Atlanta had a single mission in the earliest days: simply make people aware of the possibility that a new disease was on the horizon.

Their morbid warnings were counter to the spirit of sexual liberation that lingered from the 1970s, and encountered resistance from some.

AID Atlanta leaders wanted to produce their

MORE INFO www.theGAVoice.com AID Atlanta Honors Thursday, June 14, 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Schwartz-Goldstein Hall, The Temple 1589 Peachtree St., Atlanta, GA 30309 Tickets start at $35 www.aidatlanta.org/honors own informational brochure on the disease, and following the lead of a group in San Francisco, they wanted it to promote condom use.

“That was quite controversial,” Aliberti recalled. “No one had ever heard of safe sex.”

At one point, several gay bar owners asked to meet with AID Atlanta organizers to discuss the new group’s goals.

“It basically was yelling and screaming at us because they told us, ‘You can’t tell people to have safe sex, you can’t tell people how to lead their lives,’” Aliberti said.

After AID Atlanta printed its brochures in early 1983, they were placed in racks inside most gay clubs and bars, but the message was either being ignored or sabotaged.

“The stands started disappearing,” Aliberti said. “People started stealing them, people who didn’t want the word about safe sex to get out there, so we had to post guards at some places.”

However, opposition to AID Atlanta’s efforts was far from universal.

“It’s important for people to understand that, immediately, a lot of people came forward to help get this started,” Aliberti said. “There were entertainers, Charlie Brown helped us raise some money in the very beginning, a couple of the club owners. The women’s community came forward very fast, they were the first bar to do a fundraiser for us [at the former lesbian bar The Sports Page].”

Gratitude and sorrow

Aliberti and Jenks both have bittersweet feelings about the 30th anniversary of the organization they helped found: gratitude for the services it continues to provide, and sorrow that it’s still necessary.

Within a year, the plague that they had been warning about marched through gay Atlanta with a viciousness that would have given General Sherman goose bumps. Aliberti estimated he lost more than 100 friends in the subsequent years.

“And these were like friend, friends – not just people you passed on the street,” he said.

Friends like Graham Bruton, who died in 1993, but not before saving thousands of lives.

“If Graham hadn’t done it when he did it, how long would it have taken somebody before they did this?” Jenks wondered. “Who would have stepped up and done it? It’s the same type of thing today — you can’t rely on the government to do everything. If you want something done, then do it. That’s just who Graham was, and that’s the power of what one individual can do.”

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Don white for Premiere Party to help LGBT youth at CHRIS Kids Premiere Party began in 2002 as a small gathering and has now grown into a massive white-themed cocktail party and silent auction, but the mission remains the same: raising funds for LGBT and questioning youth who are served by CHRIS Kids, a child welfare nonprofit that provides services ranging from housing to counseling.

Premiere Party has raised $800,000 since its inception. This year’s event is set for June 9 at Mason Murer Fine Art, with tickets starting at $40.

“What I enjoy most is seeing all our friends and supporters coming out to help LGBT children, youth and families,” says CHRIS Kids CEO Kathy Colbenson. “It warms my heart to see people caring enough to do something, to give so that those who have been met with rejection can have acceptance and the support they need to get their lives on track.”

Like Premiere Party itself, CHRIS Kids’ services for LGBT youth have changed through the years. The LGBT “Rainbow Program” is now part of the bigger TransitionZ program, which helps youth make the transition to living independently through housing, counseling and other support.

EVENT SPOTLIGHT MORE INFO CHRIS Kids Premiere Party Saturday, June 9, 6-10 p.m.

Mason Murer Fine Art 199 Armour Dr., Atlanta, GA 30324 www.chriskids.org

“We serve many more LGBT kids through housing now because of the expansion,” Colbenson says.

Not all of those LGBT young people want to self-identify as such. CHRIS Kids currently serves about 300 LGBT people and their families, about 15-20 percent of the nonprofit’s total population. Some 23 of the 92 youth currently living in CHRIS Kids’ residential programs are LGBT, though Colbenson notes there may be others who are not “comfortable identifying.”

Funds raised from Premiere Party are restricted to the agency’s LGBT Fund, she says.

“All funds raised will be used to help LGBT

OurSong, shown last year at a ceremony marking the end of ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,’ performs ‘And Nature Smiled’ June 8-9.

(Photo by Laura Douglas-Brown)

CHRIS Kids CEO Kathy Colbenson (center) joined in the white attire at last year’s Premiere Party. (Photo by Sher Pruitt)

folks — those who are homeless, those who are living in families that are struggling with their orientation or gender identity, those who are without family support systems, those who need counseling, those who are bullied and to help provide training to end bullying and discrimination against LGBT folks,” Colbenson says.

— Laura Douglas-Brown

Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus salutes equality struggles The Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus is preparing to present “Red, White & You,” a new “mission driven” concert devoted to equality and the struggle for human rights — but not before first having a little fun at the annual Big Wig party.

The party, which this year features a fairytale theme of “Once Upon a Wig,” is set for June 2 at the former Fox Sports Grill location at Atlantic Station. Wigs are encouraged — the bigger and more elaborate, the better — with a best-wig contest as part of the festivities.

Tickets are $30 in advance or $35 at the door, with those not wearing wigs paying $40.

DJ Todd Skelton spins.

“I would say one of the biggest draws of this party is that it’s just that,” says Kevin Robison, AGMC artistic director. “This allows people who aren’t big concert goers to still support the chorus at an event. This is something that everyone has a great time at and all the proceeds go to the AGMC. Indirectly, it will enable us to make ‘Red, White & You’ available to more young people.”

While never stuffy, the chorus gets more serious for “Red, White & You,” a patriotic concert that nevertheless reminds audiences that all Americans are not treated equally under the law.

The concert, which debuts June 15-16 at Emory University’s Glenn Memorial Auditorium, is made more poignant by President Obama’s recent announcement that he supports allowing gay couples to marry.

“We knew it was an election year and time

MORE INFO Big Wig Party Saturday, June 2, 7 p.m.

Atlantic Station, former Fox Sports Grill 261 19th St., Atlanta, GA 30363 ‘Red, White & You’ Friday, June 15 - Saturday, June 16 8 p.m. both days; 2 p.m. Saturday Glenn Memorial Auditorium Emory University 1652 N. Decatur Road, Atlanta, GA 30307 www.agmchorus.org

to do another mission-driven program. Our planning was prophetic, it turns out,” Robison says. “We plan concerts months and months in advance, and I figured that with the economy the way it is, marriage equality could easily get put on the back burner this election.

“I expected that we would simply be reminding people to not forget about it with this concert,” he says. “I had no idea things would play out this way.”

Atlanta theatre greats Freddie Ashley and Courtenay Collins will join in the show, reading excerpts from speeches and other American historical writings addressing equality, including abolition, women’s suffrage and the civil rights movement, as well as LGBT rights.

“When you think of these historic movements, events, and burning issues, they all boil

The Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus, shown here performing the religious themed concert ‘Shaken Not Heard’ in 2011, debuts a new mission-driven piece, ‘Red White & You,’ in June. (Photo by Laura Douglas-Brown)

down to equality,” Robison says.

While he acknowledges the cliché, Robison promises the show really will offer “something for everyone.”

“You will hear everything from ‘America’ to Taylor Swift’s ‘Mean’ in this program,” he says. “It is not all patriotic music, but it is 100 percent made in America.”

— Laura Douglas-Brown

Oursong gets in tune with nature for June 8-9 concerts What do you get when you combine Adele, ‘Ave Maria,’ and the brightly colored plastic percussion pipes known as Boomwhackers? “And Nature Smiled,” the new concert from OurSong, Atlanta’s gay and lesbian chorus.

Set for June 8-9 at venues in Atlanta and Morrow, the show unites a variety of musical styles and composers under the common theme of nature.

Tickets are $20 for the shows at St. Bartholomew’s Episcopal Church and Clayton State University.

“There is so much incredible poetry and imagery in nature, we wanted to explore that poetry and experience,” says Robert Glor, OurSong artistic director.

The chorus worked with three composers — Rosephanye Powell, David Childs and David Dickau — to create original pieces based on poetry and the theme of nature. The concert will also include more familiar pieces including Adele’s “Set Fire to the Rain,” Huddie Ledbetter’s “Bring Me Little Water Silvie,” and even “Ave Maria.”

“Performing a wide variety of great music is important to us and to creating an interesting evening for our listeners,” Glor says. “Our theme of nature also ties the music genres together.”

OurSong is now in its 10th season and has been selected to perform at the Georgia American Choral Directors Association meeting in June. Other plans for this year include traveling to Denver for the Gay & Lesbian Association of Choruses Festival, hosting a gospel brunch fundraiser later in the summer, and auditioning new members in August.

— Laura Douglas-Brown

MORE INFO OurSong: ‘And Nature Smiled’ • Friday, June 8, 8 p.m.

St. Bartholomew’s Episcopal Church 1790 Lavista Road Atlanta, GA 30329 • Saturday, June 9, 8:15 p.m.

Spivey Hall, Clayton State University 2000 Clayton State Blvd.

Morrow, GA 30260 www.oursongatlanta.com

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Calendar

BEST BETS 05.25 - 06.07

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ADD YOUR EVENT

There are two ways to add your events to our online and print calendars. Submit your info to www.theGAVoice.com or e-mail details to editor@theGAVoice.com.

Photo by Dyana Bagby

MEMORIAL DAY

WEEKEND BIG PEACH The 24th annual Decatur Arts Festival is a three day artist take-over with tons of events including an artist walk, dance performances, book signings, artists market and much more. Events throughout the days on the Decatur Square near Clairemont Ave. and W. Ponce de Leon Ave., Decatur, GA 30030, www. decaturartsfestival.com “Queer Justice! Queer Beats!” is the theme for this year’s MondoHomo queer arts and politics fest. Friday night sees the headlining music event featuring Double Duchess, GlitterLust, the Sexual Side Effects and KIN4LIFE. Saturday brings a day of workshops ending with a variety show and live music. Sunday is Mondo Meadow with aerialists and live music ending with party at Mary’s in East Atlanta.

All events at the Arts Exchange, 750 Kalb Street, SE, Atlanta, GA 30312, www.mondohomo.com

Friday, May 25

Worthmore Jewelers celebrates the Decatur Arts Festival and the store anniversary with a Steampunk art show held in conjunction with the Artifice Club.

Enjoy the sounds of Doctor Q, drinks and appetizers.

Come dressed in Steampunk attire for a chance to win two Best Dressed awards. 6 - 9 p.m. at Worthmore Jewelers in Decatur, 117 East Court Square, Decatur, GA 30030, www.worthmorejewelers.com Former Atlantan DJay McCracken returns to spin a benefit for CHRIS Kids featuring a performance

by DAX!, prize giveaways from Boy Next Door, shot boys, go-go dancers and more. 10 p.m. at Amsterdam Atlanta, 502-A Amsterdam Ave. NE, Atlanta, GA 30306, http://on.fb.me/J736av “Ru Paul’s Drag Race” alum Morgan McMichaels is the special guest at Fab Five. 10 p.m. at Burkhart’s, 1492 Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.burkharts.com Traxx Girls’ DJ M & Twee present Dance Fever, a Memorial Day Weekend kickoff with DJ Mary Mac spinning 80s, 90s, Top 40 and house. 10 p.m. at My Sister’s Room, 1271 Glenwood Ave., Atlanta, GA 30316, www.traxxgirls.com Mixx Atlanta continues its 3rd Anniversary Celebration at 4 p.m. with a Big Peach Softball Tournament pre-party at 5 p.m. and a “grown and sexy” part with DJ Smash at 10 p.m. Mixx Atlanta, 1492-B Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.mixxatlanta.com

SOFTBALL TOURNAMENT Friday, May 25

Almost as important as the plays on the field, the Hotlanta Softball’s Big Peach tournament hosts a registration party featuring the third annual Miss and Mr. Big Peach contest hosted by Ruby Redd. $1,000 in cash and prizes. 9 - 11 p.m. at Burkhart’s, 1492 Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30324, www.hslbigpeach. com, www.burkharts.com

Photo by Laura Douglas-Brown

Friday, May 25 - Sunday, May 27

Saturday, May 26 Sunday, May 27

Hotlanta Softball hosts its annual Big Peach tournament, where teams from around the country converge on Atlanta for a weekend of competition and social events. Events throughout the weekend at Metro Softball Complex, 7310 Campbellton Road, Atlanta, GA 30331, www.hslbigpeach.com

Sunday, May 27

After two days of play on the Metro Softball fields, the Big Peach Softball Tournament wraps up with a party and awards show. 6 p.m. at the Heretic, 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.hslbigpeach.com, www.hereticatlanta.com

DJ Ron Pullman and DJ Yusef take party-goers on a “Sacred Journey” Memorial Day house music party with a special performance by Miranda Nicole. 10 p.m. at XS Ultra Lounge, 108 Spring St., Atlanta, GA 30308, www.xsultralounge.com

Saturday, May 26

Orlando’s DJ Twisted Dee spins a set for a dance event hosted by Carioca Productions. $15 before 11, $20 after. Doors at 10 p.m. at Jungle, 2115 Faulkner Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.cariocaproductions.com XS Ultra Lounge separates “the boyz from the men” with their Boot Camp Memorial Day Weekend party with a beerfest, barbecue and more. 10 p.m. at XS Ultra Lounge, 708 Spring St., Atlanta, GA 30308, twww.xsultralounge.com

Starting tonight, every Saturday is INK Saturdays with Girls in the Night, which honors and celebrates sexy ladies and their tattoos. TV’s Dice Fixos hosts with Sweet Trive and Rhythm Gattii on the mic. 10 p.m. at Inkaholics Luxury Lounge,1878 Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30324, www.facebook.com/girlsinthenight.usa Though it will technically be Sunday morning, DJ Eric Stecker (of DJ Duo Travis & Eric) hits the turn tables after the rest of ATL closes down. 3 - 7 a.m. on Sunday, May 27, at Xion, 2241 Faulkner Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, http://on.fb.me/Me5diq

Saturday, May 26 Monday, May 28

The Atlanta Jazz Festival is among the country’s largest jazz fests and includes headliners Roy Ayers, Tito Puente Jr. & Orchestra and the Robert Glasper Experiment. 1 p.m. in Piedmont Park, www.atlantafestivals.com

Sunday, May 27

The, um, ladies of the Armorettes, Atlanta’s infamous fundraising camp drag troupe, perform a special Memorial Day weekend show with prizes for hot military boys and men in uniform. 8 p.m. at Burkhart’s, 1492 Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30309, http://on.fb.me/IF8Ue0, www.burkharts.com Ladies at Play breaks it down over Memorial Day Weekend, first with a casual couture party with DJ Periodic and DJ D. Raban. 9 p.m. - 2:30 p.m. at the Venetian, 50 Hurt Plaza, Atlanta, GA 30303, http:// lapmemorialwknd2012.eventbrite.com, www.ladiesatplay.com

Monday, May 28

The Georgia Chapter of American Veterans for Equal Rights observes Memorial Day with a Taps and Wreath Placing Ceremony in Piedmont Park. 12 p.m. at the intersection of 12th St. and Piedmont Ave., http://on.fb.me/L9OeLV Memorial Day Sunday is a busy day for Heretic Atlanta as they host a Joining Hearts Foam Beach Party, the Big Peach Softball Tournament closing party and DJ David Knapp. Events through out the day at Heretic, 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.hereticatlanta.com

Monday, May 28

Ladies at Play follows up their Venetian party with an afternoon of open mic spoken word hosted by Red Summer with beats by DJ Sugarcut. 3 - 8 p.m. at Aurum, 915 Peachtree St., Atlanta, GA 30309, http:// lapmemorialwknd2012.eventbrite.com, www.ladiesatplay.com

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Friends on Ponce brings Pensacola to you with a Memorial Day cookout. 2 p.m. at Friends Neighborhood Bar, 736 Ponce de Leon Ave., Atlanta, GA 30306, www.friendsonponce-atl.com

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SPOTLIGHT

Join Traxx Girls for their annual SplasHer Memorial Day Pool Party. 3 - 8 p.m. at the Melia Roof Top Pool, 590 W. Peachtree St., Atlanta, GA 30308, http://on.fb.me/KqyD6K Photo by Brent Corcran/RNZ Photography

Mixx Atlanta ends its 3rd anniversary celebration with a Memorial Day cookout. 5:30 - 10 p.m. at Mixx Atlanta, 1492-B Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30309, www.mixxatlanta.com Writing With Intent is open to writers of fiction and creative non-fiction; group offers motivational exercises, constructive criticism and more to keep you on track. 6:30-8:30 p.m. at Charis Books & More, 1189 Euclid Ave. NE, Atlanta, GA 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com

Saturday, June 2

Gay playwright Timothy Gray presents “The Hottest Ticket in Town,” a comedy about three sad actors in a sad, sinking ship of a show with a backstage peek into the frustrations of talentless actors. Four shows only. Through June 2. $10 advance, $15 at the door. Doors at 7:30 p.m., show at 8 p.m. at the Arts Exchange, 750 Kalb St. SE, Atlanta, GA 30312, www.oddmanouttheater.com LeBuzz hosts its 5th annual Turnabout Show where the bar staff does drag and the entertainers become bartenders for a night. 10 p.m. at Lebuzz, 585 Franklin Road, Marietta, GA 30067, www.thenewlebuzz.com

Thursday, May 31

Apres Diem “Feeds the Soul” with a monthly fundraising venture for a number of Atlanta’s non-profits.

This month its Joining Hearts, and 20 percent of today’s total receipts will be donated. Apres Diem, 931 Monroe Drive, Atlanta, GA 30308, www.apresdiem.com Atlantic Station’s Movies in Central Park offers a free, outdoor screening of “Dirty Dancing.” Film starts at sundown in Atlantic Station, 1380 Atlantic Drive, Atlanta, GA 30363, www.atlanticstation.com, http://bit.ly/HQxNjT Latino Fire Atlanta presents the Grand Opening Temptation Party featuring Latin, top 40 and dance music with special guests and a live performance. 9 p.m. at Josephine Lounge, 6235 Peachtree Industrial Boulevard, Atlanta, GA 30306, http://on.fb.me/JhgygQ

Friday, June 1

The Atlanta Bucks gay rugby team hosts a $10 all-you-can-eat wings and beer on the front patio of the Heretic. DJ Lydia Prim spins after. 8 p.m. at the Heretic, 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road., Atlanta, GA 30324, www.facebook.com/atlantabucks

Thursday, May 31

“Pay it For-Red” as Latino singer Andres Cuervo performs a benefit show featuring drinks by Cuervo Tequila and BV Wins with nosh by Food Network personality Chef Alexis Hernandez, and, of course, the Atlanta Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Proceeds from the benefit go to Positive Impact. $10 includes cocktails, bites and entertainment. 6 - 8 p.m. at the Wimbish House. 1150 Peachtree St. NE, Atlanta, GA 30309, http://on.fb.me/KRlYNb

The Atlanta Gay Men’s Chorus hosts its annual Big Wig Party, this year themed “Once Upon a Wig.” Admission is discounted with a wig, and there’s an open bar, raffle and beats by DJ Todd Skelton. 7 p.m. at Atlantic Station in the space that was Fox Sports Grill, 261 19th St., Atlanta, GA 30363, www.agmchorus.org

Saturday, June 2

The MEGA Family Project hosts a course of information and support about the different routes to LGBT parenthood. 9:30 a.m. - 12 p.m. at the Phillip Rush Center, 1530 Dekalb Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.megafamilyproject.org Gay singer/songwriter JL Rogriguez plays an intimate show to raise funds for recording and producing new music. 8 p.m. at the Mint Moose, 248 Josephine Street, Atlanta, GA 30307, www.jlrodriguezmusic.com The party boys of Bearracuda return to the Heretic with the Atlanta debut of DJ Paul Goodyear all the way from Sydney, Australia. 9 p.m. at Heretic, 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.hereticatlanta.com

Saturday, June 2 Sunday, June 3

The Virginia-Highland Summerfest means two days of music, arts and even a 5k. Saturday 10 a.m. - 11 p.m., Sunday 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. on Virginia between North Highland and Park Drive. www.vahi.org/summerfest/

Saturday, June 1

k.d. lang performs an intimate show at the Atlanta Botanical Gardens with special guest Jane Siberry. 8 p.m. at the Atlanta Botanical Garden, 1345 Piedmont Ave. NE, Atlanta, GA 30309, www.atlantabotanicalgarden.org Publicity photo

The Health Initiative hosts a screening of the documentary “Trans,” about the joys and challenges of being trans in the world today. Dr. Mark Schoen, a producer of the film, will be present and a Q&A follows. 7 p.m. at the Phillip Rush Center, 1530 Dekalb Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, http://on.fb.me/KpfkwM

Publicity photo

Wednesday, May 30

Sunday, June 3

Kelli’s Childcare Collective of Atlanta presents a family reading and pizza day with local author Michele Yulo, who brings “Super Tool Lula,” a children’s book that teaches being different and kind is cool. 1 - 2:30 p.m. at Charis Books and More, 1189 Euclid Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com

CONTINUED ON PAGE 36

Saturday, June 2 Lesbian acoustic duo Halcyon starts the night with a concert, then DJ Liz Owen spins the night away for Chase Daniels’ birthday. 9:30 p.m. at My Sister’s Room, 1271 Glenwood Ave., Atlanta, GA 30316, www.mysistersroom.com

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UPCOMING Friday, June 8 Saturday, June 9

Thursday, June 7

Saturday, June 9

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< MORE LGBT EVENTS: Visit our website for our extensive daily calendar, including nightlife schedules, sports, worship services and community organization meetings. www.thegavoice.com/calendar

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 35

Monday, June 4

“T&F Transitionz: a Project of the Feminist Outlawz” is an open forum to discuss gender and facilitating dialogue and activism around social issues led by social justice minded feminists Buttonz and SJ. 7 - 9:30 p.m. at Charis Books & More, 1189 Euclid Ave NE, Atlanta, GA, 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com PFLAG Atlanta hosts its monthly First Monday support group meeting. 7:30 - 9 p.m. at the Unitarian Universality Congregation of Atlanta, slightly beyond 1587 Northeast Expressway, Atlanta, GA 30329, www.pflagatl.org

Tuesday, June 5

Co-sponsored by Atlanta Pride, Charis Books and More hosts a discussion of “I Must Resist: Bayard Rustin’s Life in Letters.” 7:30 - 9 p.m. at Charis Books and More, 1189 Euclid Ave. NE, Atlanta, GA 30307, www.charisbooksandmore.com

Wednesday, June 6

The Atlanta Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce hosts a Business Builder Luncheon. 11:55 a.m. – 1 p.m. at Carpe Diem, 105 Sycamore Place, Decatur, GA 30030, www.atlantagaychamber.org

Le Buzz hosts the Miss Gay Heart of the South and USA at Large pageant. 10 p.m. at Le Buzz, 585 Franklin Road., Marietta, GA 30067, www.thenewlebuzz.com

Thursday, June 7

SAGE Atlanta, a services and advocacy organization for LGBT elders, hosts Emory Fellow Dr. Daniel Rivers for the lecture “1980s: Epidemic and Unexpected Effects.” 11 a.m. at the Phillip Rush Center, 1530 Dekalb Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307 The Atlanta Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce hosts an LGBT Business Certification Workshop. 3 - 5 p.m. at the Philip Rush Center, 1530 Dekalb Ave., Atlanta, GA 30307, www.atlantagaychamber.org The Atlanta Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence are helping the Armorettes reach their $2 million mark with a fundraising night at Woof’s. 6 - 9 p.m. at Woof’s, 2425 Piedmont Ave., Atlanta, GA 30324, http://on.fb.me/J9uVER Atlantic Station’s Movies in Central Park offers a free, outdoor screening of “The Muppets.” Film starts at sundown in Atlantic Station, 1380 Atlantic Drive, Atlanta, GA 30363, www.atlanticstation.com, http://bit.ly/HQxNjT Join infamous drag personality Ruby Redd for the truly Dirty Boy Bingo. 10 p.m. at Cockpit, 465 Boulevard, Atlanta, GA 30312, http://thecockpit-atlanta.blogspot.com Start your thursday nights with Texas Hold’em Poker at 7:30 p.m., then catch the Shawnna Factor drag show. 11 p.m. at Blake’s on the Park, 227 10th St NE, Atlanta, GA 30309, www.blakesontheparkatlanta.com

One of the summer’s hottest non-profit events, the CHRIS Kids Premiere Party is a fundraiser for the CHRIS Kids Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Fund, which provides transitional housing to LGBT homeless youth. A $40 ticket to the white party includes two complimentary drinks, which a $125 VIP ticket includes an open bar. 6 - 10 p.m. at Mason Murer Fine Art, 199 Armour Dr. NE, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.chriskids.org

Saturday, Jun 16

The unstoppable Kathy Griffin brings her celebrity trash talk to Atlanta for two shows. 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. at the Fox Theatre, 660 Peachtree St., Atlanta, GA 30308, www.foxtheatre.org

The lesbian-inclusive “alterna-grass” band Roxie Watson plays two shows at Decatur’s famous acoustic hot spot. 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. at Eddie’s Attic, 515-B N. McDonough St., Decatur, GA 30030, www.eddiesattic.com “Unmasked: The Phantom of the Flopera” is a send up of the Broadway classic with original music. Performance benefits the First MCC outreach programs that includes a food bank, weekly hot meals for the homeless and a clothing closet. The event also includes a silent auction. $20 or two for $30, 8 p.m. at First MCC, 1379 Tullie Road NE, Atlanta, GA 30329, www.thespiritofbroadway.com San Francisco’s DJ Phil B. mans the turntables at Heretic. 10 p.m. at Heretic, 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 30324, www.hereticatlanta.com

Friday, June 15 Saturday, June 16

‘Red, White & YOU’ is the Atlanta Gay Men’s summer concert and features patriotic songs from the “American songbook” and guest appearances by Courtenay Collins and Freddie Ashley.

8 p.m. both days, 2 p.m. matinee on Saturday at the Glenn Memorial Auditorium on the campus of Emory University, 1652 N. Decatur Road, Atlanta, GA 30307, www.agmchours.org

Saturday, June 16

Find out why the East Point Possums Show was voted the “Best Charity Event” by GA Voice readers with the 15th annual production, this year a fundraiser for the Phillip Rush Center. 7 - 11 p.m. at the Commons of DOwntown East Point, 2727 East Point St., East Point GA 30344, www.eastpointpossums.com

via Facebook Photo

Every Thursday is 3 Legged Cowboy night at the Heretic with free line dance lessons at 8 p.m followed by open dance at 9 p.m.

2069 Cheshire Bridge Road, Atlanta, GA 303024, www.hereticatlanta.com

EVENTS

Publicity photo

“… and Nature Smiled” is OurSong’s spring concert and the beginning of the gay and lesbian mixed chorus’ 10th anniversary season. June 8: 8 p.m. at St. Bart’s Episcopal Church, 1790 Lavista Road NE., Atlanta, GA 30329. June 9: 8:15 p.m. at Spivey Hall, on the campus of Clayton State University, 2000 Clayton State Boulevard, Morrow, GA 30260, www.oursongatlanta.com

Friday, June 15 Sunday, June 17

GA Boy Productions and Keith Young present Peach Party Atlanta, two days of non-stop beats at four of Atlanta’s biggest dance venues. Friday night, DJ Sin Morera takes over the Heretic. Saturday afternoon, DJ Corey D. and Micky Friedmann spin at Opera. Saturday night, DJ Paulo spins Jungle and in the wee hours of Sunday morning, DJ Abel takes over Xion. www.peachpartyatl.com

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GA Voice

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Community

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THAT’S WHAT

SHE SAID

Honor all of our fallen Marking the first Memorial Day without ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’

My father was a war veteran. During a debate on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” with me years ago, he shared his thoughts on why straight men in the military were uncomfortable with gays serving.

It had nothing to do with sexuality, my dad explained, but instead came from an interpretation of weakness. He personally had no concern about someone hitting on him, but he was convinced a gay man would lose his nerve in battle and cause my father to die along with him.

That was based on the way my father grew up, thinking the only gay men he knew were the extremely effeminate men he saw around town and misinterpreted their character and womanly gait as frail.

My dad’s views changed as he grew older, and he came to appreciate anyone willing to sacrifice their lives in service to their country — soldiers like Cpl. Andrew Charles Wilfahrt of Minnesota.

Andrew was bullied at school after coming out at 16, once having to drive his car with “Go Home Fag” spray-painted on it, but continued to fight for his rights and the rights of others. He didn’t enter the Army until he was almost 30, and was inspired to do so after seeking advice from a retired gay soldier who lived in his hometown.

That retired Marine says Andrew, who was single, told him he wanted to serve so a soldier with a wife and children wouldn’t have to go fight.

Last year, on Feb. 27, Andrew and his platoon were on foot patrol in a region west of Kandahar, crossing a bridge toward a police checkpoint. That’s when a massive bomb detonated beneath Andrew, killing him. Cpl. Wilfahrt was 31, and is believed to be the first gay U.S. soldier to die in battle since President Obama signed the repeal of DADT.

Melissa Carter is also a writer for Huffington Post.

She broke ground as the first out lesbian radio personality on a major station in Atlanta and was one of the few out morning show personalities in the country. Follow her on Twitter @MelissaCarter

Alan Rogers grew up in Florida, and was elected Most Intellectual by his high school classmates. He became an ordained pastor shortly after high school, joined the ROTC at the University of Florida, and accepted a commission into the Army after graduating. He reached the rank of Major, and served as an Intelligence Officer.

In July 2007, Rogers was deployed to Iraq and killed six months later by an IED while on foot patrol in Baghdad. Controversy followed, after initial reports of his death omitted his sexuality. It was later revealed that he was gay and worked to end the military’s DADT policy.

Then there are those whose names we don’t know. In February 2010, Congressman Jim Moran was on the floor of the House of Representatives and read a letter from a soldier in Afghanistan. It stated that the soldier had “learned that a fellow soldier was also gay, only after he was killed by an IED in Iraq. The partner of the deceased soldier wrote the unit to say how much the victim had loved the military; how they were the only family he had ever known.”

It was the second publicly known case of a gay soldier killed in action during the recent wars in the Middle East. The first was Maj. Rogers.

Memorial Day is a day of remembering the men and women who died while serving in the United States Armed Forces, but exactly how many gay or lesbian soldiers that includes is lost in the forced lies given to recruiters.

On this first Memorial Day holiday since the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” let us honor those who risked their lives both on the battlefield and in the barracks. Let us also be thankful that now all our soldiers can serve openly and honestly, gaining the respect of guys like my dad.

As one Sergeant said of Cpl. Wilfahrt, “I just trusted him and was proud to be serving next to him right there on the battlefield.”

A&E

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DOMESTICALLY

DISTURBED

Pick a side Bringing the fight for equality home

The producer of a talk show was looking for a married gay couple living in an area where their marriage isn’t recognized. My friend Jeffery, who has his own show on LOGO and a book deal and is generally way more successful than I am, put the producer in touch with me. My husband and I both had work commitments on the day they were filming, so our talk show debut was not meant to be, but we still had a pleasant conversation.

I’ve never been prescreened for a talk show, but I watched every episode of “Oprah: Season 25 Behind the Scenes,” which was actually really solid prep work. I answered all of her questions about the logistics of health insurance, how we went about changing our names, and the business of daily life.

I explained why Obama’s endorsement of marriage equality mattered. I gave a few human interest slice-of-life anecdotes, including a dog story. Overall, it felt like a great rehearsal for my fantasy interview on Fresh Air with Terry Gross, which is my Mount Everest. One day, Terry Gross. One day, you will be mine.

“So, what are you and your husband doing in the fight for marriage?” she asked.

“What are we doing?” I replied. “Well, we’re being married. Every day. It’s not so much a fight as a persistent demand that we be acknowledged for what we are.”

I thought that was a pretty decent response, considering it was off-the-cuff. But even as I said it, I felt a rumble in my stomach. All of my nerves are located in my belly. I’d be a terrible poker player. Every time I tried to bluff, I’d poot.

Anyway, my stomach growled in that particular moment because I didn’t have actual evidence on what we were doing to fight for marriage equality. I’d been working under the belief that being married and voting for Obama were sufficient. I don’t have time to march to various locations holding a poster or banner of some kind. Plus, I sunburn very easily. But activism takes many forms, and one does not have to take to the streets to participate in the fight.

Topher Payne is an Atlanta-based playwright, and the author of the book “Necessary Luxuries: Notes on a Semi-Fabulous Life.” Find out more at topherpayne.com

The last few weeks have been extraordinary.

The president and vice president both endorsed marriage equality, after years of people asking each to clarify his position on the subject.

Mitt Romney then made his position against marriage equality abundantly clear, so now we know where everybody stands going into the election. Am I a single-issue voter? Nope.

But I’m not voting for a candidate who has no respect for my marriage when there’s a viable candidate that supports it.

Plus, Mitt says his faith doesn’t allow him to endorse marriage equality. The conservatives and Evangelicals who support him all seem to be fine with that, because their chosen religion agrees with that particular view. But they’re forgetting: Mitt’s a Mormon. They believe some wacky stuff, diverging from the Southern Baptists in pretty significant ways. He’s made it clear his Mormon faith will guide him on this public policy. I wonder where else that’ll turn out to be true.

Since the president’s interview with ABC’s delightful and ambiguous Robin Roberts, the pressure to pick a side has really amped up. The NAACP is on our side. So is Jay Z. It’s the hot question in every celebrity interview. I have to be brave enough to ask that question of the people around me. I don’t really ask. I just assume the support of some people, and with others, I avoid the topic because I’m afraid of the answer.

But I’m married. And if someone in my life does not respect the authenticity of my marriage, if they wouldn’t defend it on my behalf, then they’re working against us. They’re a bigot. Maybe they’re a bigot because of their religion, or maybe it’s because… okay, let’s be fucking real here. It is ONLY because of their religion. Just because my God is awesome and theirs is apparently kind of a dick is no reason to infringe on my rights.

These people are toxic, and they have no place in my life. From now on, no matter who they are, the people around me are going to pick a side. That’s how I’m fighting for equality.

May 25, 2012

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