Empire Times 43.4

EMPIRE TIMES YOUR

STUDENT MAG

43.4

Free 4 All monty python | creativity comp | voting | sex pistols | kim kardashian

Creativity Competition: Visual Art First Prize: Painted by Sheydin Dew

- Editorial -

This issue has been an exciting one.

Mostly because it features the results of the Creativity Competition that I almostsinglehandedly organised. After coming second place in the comp last year (in the Fiction category), I wanted to give other people that same opportunity to actually win money for their work (and winning a competition always looks good on a résumé when you’re starting out). But strangely enough it hadn’t occured to me just how involved running a competition is, from writing up specific guidelines, to answering every entry email, and judging.

Yes, I hadn’t counted on the judging. This is a woman with two degrees.

And even though I actually can’t really tell good poetry from bad, Luckily I have friends who do, and together we managed to pick all our wonderful winners in each category. The Visual Arts winner is on the inner cover.

On top of this extra stress, I’m also a little sad as this issue may be my penultimate one.

Barring some freak accident, I’m set to turn in my Honours thesis in July, which means Issue 5 may very well be my last (cos you can’t run the magazine if you’re not a student, and while it’s a blurry grey area there’s some concensus that turning in your final assessment ends your student status). Which means from Issue 6 you’ll have a shiny new editor to contend with, along with Liam and Eleanor (who have gotten so good at this gig over the past few months, I’m sure ET will be in safe hands).

BUT it is not yet the time for mournful goodbyes. You’ll still have to deal with me for a little while yet.

Being editor of this magazine has been a wonderful experience. It’s been the most trying experience I’ve ever had as well. It gave me a direction, cause, and purpose.

Being entrusted with something I considered as important as this magazine came as a terrifying responsibility – and one I’ve attempted to commit to with the best of my ability.

Being someone with a lot of anxiety and a history of depression, I was honoured to join this team. Recently, we had our contributor party and getting to meet so many people whose work I’ve edited and whose words I’ve known, without having met them was a good experience. It was weird, but it was wonderful.

It feels weird to be given such a responsibility after a diagnosis of major depressive disorder – a diagnosis I kept secret from a lot of people for a long time, even after it forced me to leave uni for a semester in 2014. Over time, I’ve become more honest about it. I’ve acknowledged it’s a part of me, however unwelcome it may be.

This year has seen me wear that truth more openly than ever before. This editorial sees me wear it as openly as I possibly can. I felt the shame and stigma of mental illness whilst paradoxically regarding many who were honest about it as great examples of strength and honesty.

To match the free, chaotic, themeless nature of this issue, I thought I’d get a bit wild with my editorial and just ramble...I want to list and celebrate some of the amazing things that have happened since our last issue came out...

- Waleed Aly winning the 2016 Gold Logie for Best Personality on Australian TV. His speech was wonderfully touching. He said “There have been a lot of people in the past week or two who have made it clear to me that me being here right now really matters to them”, and how true.

That night, Waleed Aly showed us that we can overcome barriers to make it in this world, but most importantly - we can deeply inspire and resonate with other people.

- The Women’s Studies faculty at Flinders celebrated its 30th birthday - 30 years of being an independent and autonomous department on campus; cheers to the many badass trailblazing women in the 30-year history of Women’s Studies @ Flinders.

- Speaking of badass, we hosted our first Empire Times contributor party of the year and it was awesome. Great hospitality from The Tav, wonderful company, and we also announced our Creativity Competition winners - and their pieces can be found within this issue! All in all, a top night.

- Finally, the last great thing I’d like to mention and celebrate...Simone and Liam. I was pretty sick towards the end of the production of this issue, and Simone and Liam helped me out a lot by holding down the fort and doing my share These four issues have been a great of the work when I couldn’t. You guys are my experience and I’ve loved them dearly.

MVPs and I’ll make it up to you somehow (most likely through coffee and chocolate). Here’s to And, I look forward to what I hope are quite friendship and teamwork. a few more to come.

There are many little victories that take place in Liam our lives from day to day - all we have to do is open our eyes and notice them.

Eleanor

Simone

TOP PICKS FOR THIS ISSUE

TOP PICKS FOR THIS ISSUE

TOP PICKS FOR THIS ISSUE

p. 10 p. 23 p. 34 p. 41

p. 42 p. 12 p. 36 p. 29

p. 41 p. 29 p. 12 Inner cover

Disappearing Palistine Ripple Effect Ask JT Readers’ Di(Jess)t

Television Showcase: Monty Python #Liberated What the FUC Just Vote it, Vote it Good

Readers Di-Jess(t) Just Vote it, Vote it Good #Liberated Visual Art winner

1

OH HELLO there.

Vol 43 Issue 4 EDITORS

Simone Corletto Liam McNally Eleanor Danenberg

SUB-EDITORS Anupol Bordoloi Kayla Gaskell Brenton Griffin Jack Harrison Jess Miller Marithe Solis

COLUMNISTS

Aden Beaver Rhianna Carr Ashley Curtis Jordon T. Early Richard Falkner Brenton Griffin Kelly Guthberlet Emma Hough Hobbs Jess Miller Karen Smart Elle Void Amber, the Devil’s Advocate

ILLUSTRATORS

Sheydin Dew Aden Beaver

CONTRIBUTORS

Jason Byrne Richard Falkner Kayla Gaskell Cameron Lowe Joel Marks Liam McNally Caleb Pattinson Lauren Reid Georgia Riessen Jordon O’Reilly Amanda Sloan Leeza von Alphen Xarchaeceya Waskowski-Jones Laurence Lacoon Williamson

FRONT COVER

Aden Beaver

INNER FRONT COVER

Sheydin Dew, Visual Arts winner of the Creativity Competition

FREE 4 ALL

Empire Times is the student publication of Flinders University. All work within remains the property of the producers and may not be reproduced without their consent. Empire Times reserves the right to republish in any format.

Empire Times would like to acknowledge the Kaurna people who are the traditional custodians of the land Flinders University is situated on, and that this land was never ceded, but stolen. We would like to pay our respects to the elders of the Kaurna nation and extend that respect to other Aboriginal peoples, past, present, and future.

‘The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the editors, Flinders University, or Flinders University Student Association. Reasonable care is taken to ensure that Empire Times articles and other information are up-to-date and as accurate as possible, as of the time of publication, but no responsibility can be taken by Empire Times magazine for any errors or omissions contained herein.’

WITH THANKS TO Everyone who entered our annual Creativity Competition; thank you for supporting ET and sharing your work with us. We had so much fun judging the pieces and enjoying Flinders’s talent!

Jess Miller, for using her superhuman literary powers for good and not for evil - thank you for being our guest judge and helping us pick the Poetry winners of the Creativity Competition.

Anthea Stanton for helping us organise our first contributor party of the year, and the Tav for hosting such a fantastic evening.

Contact us: empire.times@flinders.edu.au www.empiretimes.com.au @empiretimesmag @empiretimesmag

INNER BACK COVER

Emma Hough Hobbs

BACK COVER

Sarah Gates, Photography winner of the Creativity Competition

/empiretimesmag Empire Times Contributors Advertising: stephanie.walker@flinders.edu.au

contents.

INTRO

FEATURES

1

EDITORIAL Words from the Editors

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5

LETTERS TO THE EDITORS Talk to us!

23

COLUMNS 6 PATTO’S PERSPECTIVE Conversations with Caleb: a message from your SC President 7 SC INTERVIEW Welfare Officer

POLITICAL PLAYGROUND The best financial system for Tertiary Education THE RIPPLE EFFECT How much control, if any, do we have over our own lives?

24 VOX POPS Voice of the people 26 POCKETCHANGE PANTRY Financiers

10 POLITICS Interview: Palestine Centre for Peace

29 VOTE IT, VOTE IT GOOD 5 Step Guide to Democracy

12 DEVIL’S ADVOCATE #Liberation

30

14 INTO THE GENDER VOID xy 32 HIDDEN GEMS Marino - Hallet Cove Boardwalk 33 GET SMART Home Truths

THE ROYAL HEIRHEADS The Sex Pistols in Retrospect

35 ALUMNI INTERVIEW ABC Journalist, Simon Royal

CREATIVITY COMPETITION

34 ASK JT Advice that you should NOT take

16 FICTION WINNER Suspension of Thought

36 WHAT THE FUC FLICS - Cinephile Society on Campus

18 FICTION RUNNER-UP The Dream 21 POETRY WINNER Shielded from the Rain

Artwork: Sheydin Dew

21 POETRY RUNNER-UP Cloudburst 22 VISUAL ARTS RUNNER-UP Faded

CULTURE CORNER 40 REVIEWS John Wick & Fear is the Rider 41 READERS’ DI-JESS(T) First Person Shooter 10 SHOWS THAT 42 CHANGED TV Monty Python’s Flying Circus 44 THEATRE REVIEW Little Shop of Horrors 45 FILM REVIEW Labyrinth of Lies 46 LEVEL UP Munchkin 47 MUSIC REVIEW Kanye West - Olafur Arnalds & Nils Frahm - The Pet Shop Boys 48 ANIME REVIEW Free! Eternal Summer

FUN STUFF 38

CROSSWORD Win free movie tickets!

39

COLOURING PAGE Embrace your inner child

33

JU NE Monday

Tuesday

Week 12

wednesday

thursday

1 FUSA Welfare Breakfast @ Registry Rd

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friday

saturday

sunday

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FLICS - ‘Rocky’ @ Humanities Nth1

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Week 13

FUSA Welfare Breakfast @ The Plaza

13 Week 14

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FUSA Welfare Breakfast @ Education

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FUSA Welfare Breakfast @ Sturt

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FPSA Statistics workshop 6pm

FPSA Quiz Night

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Queen’s Birthday (Public Holiday)

20 Exams

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Exams

Speakeasy @ The Wheatsheaf 6pm - late

2nd of July ELECTION DAY!

Letters to the

Editors Hey Eds, Dear Editors,

Editors, I’m writing to express my displeasure at one of your associates’ self-indulgent and quite frankly inapproproate over-use of quote unquote “nerd” references.

It’s completely exclusionary to those of us too mature to partake in such nonsense.

- DrTobiasFunke

To Editors, Do you have a vacancy for Student Council President?

Thank you for posting that informative SSAF Awareness article on your Facebook page.

It was well-written, helpful and timely.

I think you are truly using your media platform for good by teaching students about such important and relevant topics.

-Amused

- ProudlyProSSAF Hey ET Editors, Dear Editors, Your Ask JT column is terrible.

Where’s the advice on all the romance things students care about?

I just would like to be President of something.

Things like “How do I tell my bf I was only dating him for his knowledge of SN1 Eliminations?” and “I think my now ex-boyfriend gave me the wrong answers to my exam?”

- T. Cruz xx

We want to see some savage love advice!

Or, any type of President?

I’m really loving your coverage of all this Student Council drama. It sure makes for interesting reading on an otherwise boring Wednesday morning. I can’t tell if the media coverage is better or if this year’s SC are just more hilariously unstable. Either way, keep up the good work!

- Frankie Neptune

Can you ease up on the articles complaining about how the world is out to get everyone?

Thanks, Mitchelle Johndad

What will you do when they catch you? What will you do if they break you? If you continue to fight, what will you become?

-R1

Got a question? Compliment? Complaint?

Send your letters to empire.times@flinders.edu.au, tweet us at @empiretimesmag , or message the Empire Times Facebook page.

5

- President’s Report -

FUSA Student President Patto’s Perspective

Caleb Pattinson Flinders University Student Association (FUSA) has come along in leaps and bounds over the years. From the ashes of Voluntary Student Unionism (VSU) we now have an active and engaged campus at Flinders University. This has been fundamentally good for Flinders students.

Retaining the quality of education at Flinders is always at the forefront of what we do. The dangerous rumours surrounding a restructure of academic staff and the courses of this University should be troubling to any student. This always ends up in the loss of staff jobs and the further commodification of the education system. FUSA gives a voice to students to fight against these policies and decisions that generally result in a poor University system. Students are encouraged to stand with FUSA as we fight hostile Government policy and engage the University administration is fighting for a basic human right, a quality education.

It is no secret that students are struggling to afford the basic costs of living. This is why the welfare events which originate from the Student Council are essential to the campus life. This year we have already seen significant accomplishments come from the Student Council body, such as the expansion of our welfare initiatives, which means fewer students are going hungry around campus, and more brunches and ‘Relax’ events. Unfortunately it seems this is still not enough for students of this University. I still receive concerning reports of students going hungry, unable to afford a decent and nutritious meal. This is a problem that Student Council will continue to look at as we roll further initiatives out across the year.

Student Council have already rolled out several essential campaigns regarding your time at University. For the first time this year, FUSA were able to facilitate the entire social side of O’Week. All the feedback we has received has been positive

and we will again build for a semester two event. We of course launched our car parking campaign in O’Week – a campaign that has slowed down but not been forgotten. We are constantly talking to the University regarding the feedback coming through the campaign and how we can change the system. Car parking might seem trivial to a select few, but when you are a student struggling to put food on your table each night, being charged an extensive fee for a business you are already handing over thousands of dollars to is undoubtedly wrong. We also launched a ‘Brought to you by SSAF’ campaign, to make students more aware of how this money is distributed throughout the year.

SSAF spending should be open and transparent, including how the University spent $125,000 of this vital funding on their new pet project, The Hub. This magazine you are reading is funded through the SSAF, as are the editors’ honoraria. Often the sausage sizzles you see through the plaza promoting various events also come out of this money. We are aiming to make it as easy as possible for you to be informed of how this money is spent.

The Student Council that governs FUSA is under constant scrutiny. Very rarely is it acknowledged that the members of the council are essentially volunteers, paid in honorariums, giving up their time to make the University a better place. We have already seen some fantastic events and initiatives originate this year, building on the fantastic work of previous student councils. So next time you stop to grab your free piece of fruit on the way to class, remember it was a member of Student Council fighting hard to look after your welfare.

I am open to all students for contact: E: student.president@flinders.edu.au P: 8201 3621 F: www.facebook.com/PresidentPattinson

- Student Council Interview -

Welfare Officer

Jason Byrne Why did you run for your position on Student Council?

I ran for Welfare Officer at the end of last year after watching the Liberal government spend 18 months attacking students. Funding cuts to the tune of 20% and the deregulation of university fees were sold as ‘innovation’ and ‘reform’ when in reality they were just a thinly veiled attempt to reign in government spending to try and deliver a pipe-dream of returning the budget to surplus.

Increasing university fees through deregulation will lead to Flinders students being put into debt of up to $100,000 for certain degrees.

The government has unashamedly kept trying to push this agenda despite economists showing that it will only increase the amount of debt that the government will be covering for students.

Lastly, I ran for FUSA because I am passionate about having a really great campus culture. Before voluntary student unionism came into effect in 2006 Flinders was a campus which was known for its great gigs in its notoriously dingy bar. With the reopening of the Hub this year we’ve got the chance to reignite an awesome campus life which we lost when the permanent food vendors closed in 2014 for the rebuild. FUSA was given control of the social side of O’Week for the first time this year and it was a great success; over 100 clubs were on campus and we threw the greatest O’Week party in Australia with The Rubens and other awesome artists! FUSA has the ability to make campus life at Flinders awesome and I want to make sure that keeps happening.

What do you want to achieve this year with your position on Student Council?

Being Welfare Officer of FUSA is a bit of a confusing role. The job that I do intersects with so many of the other office bearers that it becomes a bit of a blur. I’ve been working with the other office bearers to find campaigns which will further the completion of my goals. Ultimately I’ve chosen to focus on improving the physical and financial wellbeing of students as my endgame. Flinders students often come from low socio-economic backgrounds and work multiple jobs in order to pay rent, feed themselves and pay the bills. The most important role of student associations is to provide a support network for their members where the outside world cannot assist.

The first thing I set to achieve this goal was the introduction of more free breakfasts for students and the introduction of pancakes

once a week. I was able to achieve this earlier on in the year but am currently working on expanding the project to Victoria Square.

So many students come to uni without eating in the morning or without enough money to buy food when they get here. Providing food for students can really make a difference in how they are able to learn and work during the day.

Secondly I want to ensure that the university is held accountable for the choices it makes in regards to student life and education.

A university that is hostile towards its student association severely hinders the ability of councillors to perform the basic functions of our position. FUSA councillors must balance the interests of students with a relationship with the university so I believe that we all have a responsibility to continue the working relationship we currently have while passionately fighting your our members.

Tell us what you’re organising or contributing to right now, in the capacity of your position?

In terms of campaigns directly related to my role I am about to start organising a ‘Your Rights @ Work’ fair for students at Flinders. It was recently revealed to FUSA that the poster sale that occurs annually on uni campuses pays its staff in posters and not money. This is a blatant breach of industrial law and must be addressed by teaching students about their rights at work.

Unfortunately this isn’t an isolated incident, I often hear stories of students who have been exploited by their employer through underpayments and shift length breaches. I am passionate about ensuring that students are aware of their rights at work and it is important to stand up against employers who refuse to respect the laws.

I’ve also been working on the Democracy Drive which is a FUSA campaign to get students enrolled to vote for the Federal Election. A massive amount of young Australians aren’t enrolled to vote and we will never be able to elect a progressive, pro-student government until the day that young people are actively engaged and voting in elections. This has been a great success already after one event so far this year, and in the lead up to the election on July 2nd. I look forward to continuing this campaign and others like it. We’ve seen in the 2016 budget that attacks to students continue and only by voting this shitty government out can we change that.

Find: FUSA Welfare Collective page on Facebook.

7

POLitical PLAYGROUND What is the best method for financing higher education?

SOCIALIST ALTERNATIVE

LABOR RIGHT

Higher education should be free, and available to all. We once had free education in Australia, and many places around the world currently have it – Brazil, Germany, Scotland, Finland, and Mexico are just a few of many. It’s perfectly achievable.

There is much debate on how we fund higher education and who pays for it. Debate over higher education funding ramped up when the Abbott/Turnbull government sought to end the regulation of university fees, privatise your HECS Debt and cut 20% of funding to Universities. The far left’s reply was that universal free higher education is the best way to see Australia prosper, and they are close but still off the mark.

Compare it with what we have now. For years Australian universities have been underfunded. Our classes keep getting bigger, so do our fees, but the amount the government contributes per student hasn’t kept pace with student numbers. We pay more for a worse education, staff are overworked and underpaid, and business (the real beneficiary of a highly educated workforce) pays almost nothing. Liberal and Labor love to talk about the private benefit for students from higher education, however most of the private benefits are reaped by big businesses, as their profits soar thanks to having access to a highly skilled and qualified workforce.

Both parties claim we can’t afford to pay for free universal education or to even increase funding to the tertiary education system. This is a lie. The problem isn’t lack of funding; the problem is that both Liberal and Labor have other priorities. They’d rather look after their rich friends than help students. Paying for free education would be easy - firstly, they could cut tax breaks for high income earners, creating $19.5 billion in revenue. Next, stop spending $1.2 billion annually torturing refugees. Then discontinue subsidies to the fossil fuels industry, saving $10 billion per year – at least! Then there’s the big one – start taxing the rich.

The release of 11.5 million documents from Panama-based law firm Mossack Fonseca has exposed the tip of the iceberg in the global 1% hoarding huge quantities of stolen wealth. It is no wonder that only 30% of large companies in Australia pay any tax at all, according to the ATO, or that many more are free to engage in semi-legal tax avoidance schemes at their leisure. These are the same people who reap most of the “private benefits” of higher education!

The bottom line is this: there is no barrier to free education, aside from grubby politicians who have decided that students, workers, and the poor should be made to pay for the excesses of the wealthy.

Free education is just the beginning, we need to expropriate everything these leeches own and use it to benefit the people in society who actually do the hard work. Take Reinharts’s billions, take Murdoch’s papers, empty Clive’s bank account, and use their stolen wealth for education, hospitals, welfare, and whatever else people need.

If we want to get serious about how we fund higher education we should look no further than the sensible centre’s view; before we move to funding universal education we need to set a strong foundation. We should look to increase funding to primary and high schools. If we want high quality, higher education we need to prepare the tertiary students of tomorrow, today. Let’s talk about how in the current system, public schools—of which many university students come from—lack the same government funding compared to private schools. Let’s get real, high quality higher education in this country can’t happen if we continue to inadequately fund those students to prepare them for university.

The late Gough Whitlam echoed the words ‘We believe a student’s merit, rather than a parent’s wealth, should benefit from the community’s vast financial commitment to tertiary education’.

He was not wrong, we need to make higher education accessible, but we need the community to benefit. That is why the Hawke/ Keating Government introduced HECS due to the massive burden it placed on the budget. The move to HECS did not see any student worse off and there was no mass exodus of students from universities. What it did was provide all students the opportunity to simply pay back some cost of their degree once they earnt a significant amount.

If we want to see an improvement to higher education funding, prepare people for university first. Let’s increase funding to every level of education, from primary all the way to tertiary so that when people do make it to university they have a real chance at a fair go.

Jordon O’Reilly

Laurence Lacoon Williamson

THE LIBERALS, THE GREENS, and LABOR LEFT did not submit.

9 9

- Politics -

Disappearing Palestine “One day Palestine will be free and we will know that we stood upon this Earth for truth, for the innocent children of Palestine who have already seen too much” - Nazeem Hussain Since its controversial inception in 1948, the State of Israel has not been the best of neighbours to the Indigenous Palestinians.

The colonisation of Palestine by Israelis has been wrought with military occupation, unjust and illegal settlement, oppression, and violence. Palestinians and Israelis have clashed violently as Palestinians have fought for sovereignty. As of right now, there is not a free Palestine.

Over the last few years, atrocities against Palestinians have increased. These atrocities have ranged from Israelis lynching Palestinians, to Arabic-looking Jews (including Mizrahi Jews, who are native to Palestine) having to physically identify themselves as Jewish so as to avoid physical harm, to forced evictions of Palestinians from their homes. These atrocities, however, have triggered a renewed dialogue in regards to the Palestinian question.

Just a bit of a back-story. After World War II, the United Nations planned to partition Palestine and have two independent nations, one for Israelis, and one for Palestinians. This has not been how it has played out, however, and Palestinians do not have their own sovereign nation.

What’s more, colonial Israel continues to encroach on Palestinian land, often illegally.

During 1948, Israeli forces began what Palestinians now remember as al-Nakba, meaning ‘Catastrophe’ in Arabic. This was the process in which Israeli colonisers began forcibly removing Palestinians from their land, leading to mass ethnic cleansing. Thousands were slaughtered, while hundreds of thousands more fled or were forcibly removed from their towns and villages to make way for Israeli settlement.

While the UN has placed a number of sanctions on Israel due to increasing human rights issues, these have had little effect. Many in the world are not fully aware of the troubles faced in Palestine because prominent media outlets rarely report about it.

Recently, I was able to talk to Lisa Arnold and Mike Khizaim at the Palestinian Centre for Peace in Adelaide.

First question, when we talk about Palestine, historically and geographically what are we talking about? What does the Term ‘Free Palestine’ refer to?

Mike: The term has changed over time, but Palestine is basically Greater Israel, including all of Gaza and the West Bank.

Over time, Israeli colonisation of Palestine has occurred. There are Palestinians who

live in Israel, in the West Bank and in Gaza, as well as in exile. And when we talk about freeing Palestine, what we are talking about is a Two-State solution. We also talk about the right for refugees to return home, those who have been evicted through ethnic cleansings.

Is the right to return not one that is readily available now?

Mike: It is an available law, but not always permitted by the Israeli government.

Has Palestine ever been a sovereign nation?

Mike: No, not really. Like most places around the world, it is defined by the people within the borders based on a foreign conqueror’s decision. The land of Palestine, and the people living there, have existed since time immemorial, but the idea of modern Palestine is pretty new. For about five hundred years it was under the Ottomans, and then after the First World War it became a mandate for Britain.

But they did not have control over their own lives, they were under control of the British or the Turks.

As of right now, what are the main troubles befalling the Palestinians?

- Politics -

Mike: Basically, if a Palestinian is living in Israel, they almost have the same rights as an Israeli, but they are still treated as second-class citizens. However, if they live in the Occupied Territories, they are living under military control, which is essentially like living under a dictatorship; you don’t have control of your own life, you don’t have control of your economy. You have no say in the developments around you, how your resources are used or exploited.

It is not a democracy.

Lisa: Every aspect of a Palestinian’s life living in the occupied territories is controlled by Israeli permits. They need permits to move [house, suburb, village], to travel, to get to health providers, to build.

All of it is controlled by Israeli military administration. Under international law, Israel is an Occupying Power, and it is illegal for anyone as an Occupying Power to move their civilians into the territory it occupies. Hence, any settlers living in the West Bank or East Jerusalem, and there is some 600,000 Israelis, are technically there illegally.

Would those citizens know what they are doing is illegal or is it swept under the carpet by the government?

Lisa: Most probably don’t know it’s illegal.

The Israeli government encourages and gives economic incentive for settlement there. A young family cannot afford an apartment in Tel Aviv but they can get a vista in Palestinian settlements and can commute very easily in less than an hour on lovely four lane highways to their jobs in Tel Aviv, or Haifa, or anywhere in Israel.

All they know is that they have an interest free, or very low interest, mortgage. They have all this incentive to live there. Of the settlers, the overwhelming majority are going there just for economic gain, not so much for religious ones.

Mike: These religious ones are Zionist fanatics who believe that all of Israel is for them due to a covenant with God. The majority of settlers go because the Israeli government puts incentives there to get people to go to the Palestinian territories and live there. They become the pawns in the thing. The Israeli government encourages their population to move there and then they say ‘we can’t move these people back.’ And the more they do that, the more they undermine the possibility of a Two-State Solution.

What is the Two-State Solution?

Lisa: So, a Two-State solution refers to an Israeli and a Palestinian State; the Palestinian State is going to be the West Bank and Gaza. [The] Israeli State is going to be the rest of Israel proper, inside the 1948 partition.

Why is Israel so against the Two-State Solution?

Mike: There’s a consistent thread in the history of Israel and contemporary politics.

Israel was a state that was founded on the basis of an ideology [Zionism]. So, you had a population coming from Europe who were not Indigenous to the region, coming to establish a State, a Jewish state, based on religion. Zionism is Jewish nationalism that has its origins in all sorts of European history; the rise of nationalism, rise of antiSemitism, the horrors of the Holocaust.

But that thread of settling in another people’s country is what causes the moral dilemma, because the country they chose to settle in was already populated, predominantly by Muslims and Christians.

That’s underlying the conflict, as the only way they could establish a Jewish State was through ethnic cleansing and force because the Jewish proponent was a minority of the population at the time.

So when we talk about the Two-State solution, what are the problems and obstacles associated with achieving this goal?

Mike: The biggest obstacle to peace is that there is not enough incentive for the powerful party (Israel) to make the concessions that peace needs. And it’s not that the Israelis are monsters, it’s because the power disparity means the Israeli Prime Minister can say that security means they need to stay in the Occupied Territories, in the West Bank, while at the same time giving Israelis cheap loans to settle there.

There are some people who say that the Two-State goal is no longer a solution as the Israelis have worked so hard in not just building settlements, which are basically fortified zones, but they also have their own Israeli-only roads connecting the settlements to the rest of Israel. They have entire regions that they control through military closed areas. They’ve tied themselves in through using the resources of the West Bank, so to actually unscramble that, some people say that is not going to be impossible, both on the Israeli side and the Palestinian side. But the biggest obstacle is the disparity of power between the two sides.

Most Palestinians are happy to live with Israel, not because they believe the way it was created is just, but because they recognise they are not going to leave, and that the only hope for a normal life is to come to an accommodation with them.

Palestinians have had to be pragmatic about it. They have had to put aside the sense of injustice about it, and recognise the reality of power. Israel is one of the most powerful states in the world, and Palestinians have had to recognise the reality of their power.

Remember, it’s not that these things can’t be resolved. As the power equation shifts, things that were previously impossible become possible. We saw that in East Timor, when the Indonesian government fell, East Timor became free. Many of us never thought we would see that. South Africa changed, we never thought we would see that, Northern Ireland has changed, we never thought we would see that. Things will change. But the first thing that people need to recognise is the reality on the ground, and that the Israelis, through their concrete actions, are making a Two-State settlement increasingly impossible. And that is the essence of it for us.

What can be done in Australia to help Palestinians in their quest for sovereignty?

Mike: People need to recognise that if they turn a blind eye then it will lead to more disasters, and it is essentially aiding the oppressor. People need to recognise the reality of power there. No one is going to have peace, neither the Israelis nor the Palestinians, if countries like Australia don’t put pressure on Israel to make the concessions that peace needs. If that means making our politicians accountable when they say ‘don’t criticise Israel’, if it means being prepared to support consumer boycotts or disinvestments by universities and trade unions from companies that support the Occupation, we should be prepared to do that. If we do nothing, we are supporting a situation of apartheid and oppression that is going to get worst until it’ll explode.

Is there anything else that you would like to emphasise to people wanting to know more about this?

Lisa: I just want to encourage people to please take the time to learn, to educate themselves, to not accept the maxims that are thrown at you, that are used to shut down debate. Actually, we do need to talk about it, to learn about it more, and to take responsibility for our own actions and our own knowledge.

For more information, visit the Palestinian Centre for Peace at 60 Frome Street, Adelaide Or go to: http://www.afopa.com.au/ Disclaimer: Opinions belong to the author.

The author believes a Two-State solution is a necessary end to violence from both sides, and a significant act of diplomacy.

AUTHOR Brenton Griffin, 22, Bachelor of Arts (History)

Brenton would love to live in Indiana Jones’ world (or just be Indiana Jones): history/archaeology lecturer one day, Nazi-Mystic ass-kicker the next.

11

- Devil’s Advocate -

#Liberated

The male gaze in pop culture: does it merely sustain the sexual objectification of women?

This issue I’ve decided to tackle another contentious topic that is close to my heart. I’ve been hearing the phrase ‘Hey, its 2016 now. Can we not...’ with increasing frequency as a device aimed to stop conversations regarding contentious issues.

Regardless of what year it may be, I am honestly still surprised when I find articles regarding ‘public’ displays of sexuality which aim to subjugate the male gaze and redefine feminine sexuality positively. As bizarre as it may seem, my aim here is to dissect popular discourse surrounding sexuality, with a story about Kim Kardashian-West.

Now, I understand that many of you reading this have probably had your fill of Kardashian/Jenner stories, most likely enough to satisfy your most base desires for social confrontations and drama until you’re six feet under. However, I do think there is something to say for those who openly throw themselves into the void which is the internet, and still come out on top.

With that said, I aim to deconstruct the two main ‘types’ of responses regarding her disclosure of nude photos; that is, those who are for it, and who are against it. My aim is to draw out

why we, as a society, are so conflicted by nudity and sex, even though we are obsessed and surrounded by it. I feel it almost goes without saying that quite a large majority of people couldn’t care less about the personal life of the Kardashian/Jenner clan.

However, I feel that the underlying social perceptions regarding this particular moment in time are a poignant reminder of how this society understands and moderates sexual culture and morality.

In case you missed it, Kim Kardashian-West posted a nude selfie with impromptu duct-tape censor bars installed on Instagram the day before International Women’s Day, which Kim tagged with the title “TFW you have nothing to wear”. Between the posting of the initial photo and the next day, social media and online news sources were a flurry of praise and condemnation regarding Kim’s actions. During International Women’s Day, Kim posted a more “tasteful nude” photo with the title “#Liberated”. To summarise the most commonly used reactions towards Kim’s pictures, responses ranged from ‘What a slut/your nudity disgusts me/this is not an appropriate forum for this content’, to ‘Well done to Kim! You’re fighting sexual regulations, and increasing body positivity!’, and

- Devil’s Advocate -

‘Will somebody please think of the children?!’. Deconstructing these comments to their most base meanings, people were either proud of Kim’s courage for sharing her picture, thought her nakedness was inappropriate (and therefore positioned her as lesser, dirty, and wrong), or thought her nakedness would corrupt the morals of innocent children and teenage women. Within the context of the internet, the last two concepts can also be seen as a moderator of the vitriol generated towards online third-wave feminist perspectives regarding sexuality.

At this stage it is interesting to note that, generally speaking within the sphere of feminism, it is still widely debated whether “third-wave” feminism actually exists. That is, within feminism, its most recent “phase” (third-wave) is sometimes still considered a part of the larger structure of second-wave feminism. For the purpose of this article, I’ll be operating under the definition that third-wave feminism is distinctly different from second wave feminism; that third-wave encompasses the larger shift in definition of sexuality and gender exploration since the early 1990’s to now, concurrent with modern perspectives of gender and sexual rights. Second-wave feminism drew on the intersectional nature of the political climate of the time. It fought for the rights of LGBTQI people, it elaborated on the first-wave feminist identification of the patriarchal social structures which hold back women, and stood alongside black rights activists of the time.

During the flurry of reactions to Kim Kardashian-West’s picture, second-wave and third-wave feminist voiced differing perspectives. Third-wave feminist perspectives were overwhelmingly supportive of the content in Kim’s picture, celebrating its “liberating” nature. In contrast, from a second-wave feminist perspective, it could be seen that Kim’s picture was not in fact an attempt at sexual revolution; but was an attempt to seize media popularity by “cashing in” her cultural capitol of being seen as a sexualised figure by pandering to the male gaze.

For a quick crash course, the male gaze is a term coined by Laura Mulvey (1975). It describes the conceptual perspective of viewing the world and women from a (white, heterosexual) male perspective, with male attitudes. To use the analogy of film, Mulvey describes three perspectives in which things can be viewed; the perspective of the viewer (behind the lens), the viewed, and the spectator.

The male gaze is still a highly relevant tool to critically analyse the portrayal of media within our society. To me, the ‘male gaze’ primarily means a perspective of viewing with the intent to consume. I feel that the male gaze is not just a perspective which only men use; I know that I have often thought of women from this perspective, which is why I feel it is not just tied to gender (i.e. men aren’t the only people who view things from their perspective). I believe that it can also be used by people who are bisexual, and homosexual, not just heterosexual. I feel that it is primarily a perspective used by a person with the intent to position the viewed as (hierarchically) lower in order to assert dominance and consumption (i.e. the viewer consuming the viewed). My definition of consumption here is not the actual “eating” of a person, but is meant as being synonymous with the

use of an object; the viewer (and the spectator) using the gaze of the viewed for their own gain.

Considering this perspective of the male gaze, what are the consequences for those who use the gaze for their own gain?

Perhaps this is the “liberation” Kim was trying to convey, that she was in control of who saw her naked? In this regard it is important to consider that one of Kim’s “main claims to fame” was ignited after her sex tape was leaked; in 2003 Kim made a consensual sex tape with her partner at the time, Ray J, who leaked it online without her consent in 2007. The reason why Kim’s most recent nude photo may be liberating is due to the total control she had over who saw those pictures this time, in comparison to the total lack of control she had when her video was leaked.

However, when consent is given how long is it “valid” for? Within the context of Kim’s video leak there was an unspoken agreement between consensual individuals to keep the video private, forever.

To link back to the male gaze, when a viewed sexually objectified individual has their image non-consensually presented for consumption, it should be the party who leaked the image who receives punishment; it should not be the “victimised” individual who is punished because they were treated as a sexual object.

Just because one party is perceived as a sexual object, and that objectified individual has their rights removed, it doesn’t make it acceptable to treat them as such.

This further raises the question of whether sexualised selfies are subjective to the norms regarding the male gaze by the viewed controlling the viewing of the picture; or if the viewed are merely sustaining the sexual objectification of women and themselves? If so, what does it mean for the selfie taker if their photos are used in a context which they deem inappropriate?

Consider the case of DJ Tigerlilly, an Australian DJ who had a nude Snapchat image stolen and its censor bars digitally removed before the image was redistributed online without her consent.

So, the question now stands, if nude photos are to be considered empowering, at what stage are they still considered to be as such if they’re not entirely nude? If the purpose of positing nude photos is to subvert the norms regarding body regulation within society, are they really subversive if black bars are inserted?

Technically speaking, Kim’s ‘nude’ pictures weren’t deemed pornographic by Instagram’s code of conduct and as such weren’t removed. If this is the case, can these and similar photos really be challenging sexual norms by purely existing? Or is it the conversations of consent which arise surrounding these nude pictures that change our perspectives on sexualisation, which will lead to liberation?

In my opinion, if the male gaze is used to subject a woman to being a sexual object, the viewer gains; if a woman wields the male gaze for her own gain, the viewer still gains. Isn’t that the sickening truth?

AUTHOR Amber, 23, Bachelor of Behavioural Sciences (Psychology)

If Amber could live in any fictional universe it would be the Marvel Multiverse; you’d get the best of all worlds.

ART Sheydin Drew

13

- Feminism -

INTO

THE

GENDER

- VOID -

I’m very open about being a trans girl. Obviously it’s something that has a huge impact on my everyday life. Since I’ve been out I’ve noticed a lot of changes in the way people see me and the way people talk of me. On one hand the people close to me who care about me often let me know how much happier I seem to be lately, and on the other I come across people with prejudices who do their best to make things difficult.

There are many things that have changed since my transition, and there are many other things that have not. I’m not a completely different person, which is one of the fears that many people who know people wanting to transition have. Prior to my transition I was interested in videogames, I played guitar, liked to play Dungeons and Dragons, I read science fiction and fantasy books, and I was an avid writer. None of this has changed. Hell, I take my enjoyment of these things further these days.

In my teens I was a huge nerd, I had a few friends but mostly I didn’t fit in to where I lived. It was quite rural and there weren’t really that many different people in the community. Maybe if I’d met some more people like me when I was younger I might have come out as trans earlier, but it didn’t happen for a few more years. Looking back at this time of my life with the hindsight I have now, I can definitely acknowledge that some of the things I was feeling at that point in my life can be explained by me being trans. But at the time I had no words for what I was feeling, and I didn’t have anyone I could ask about it.

It took me a few years of living on my own as an adult before I was comfortable enough to properly explore my gender. It wasn’t the easiest thing to do, considering the possibility that I wasn’t what people had been telling me I was for more than twenty years.

Once I had come to terms with the fact that I was trans I realised that there were a multitude of options open for me. In exploring myself I found out about transitioning, and while much of the commonly available information about transitioning only really describes complete medical transitions, I learnt about other options and how transitioning can work in steps. Transitioning is a personal journey and people only have to go as far as they are comfortable doing. Most transitioning involves some form of social transitioning, which is the first step I took. I’d chosen a

name and over time I had asked people to stop calling me by my birth name and to start using my new name. I’d also asked people to change pronouns when talking about me.

I’ve been undergoing Hormonal Replacement Therapy (HRT) for nearly 8 months now, which has brought on many changes that I wanted. HRT is another common step in transitioning for many trans people. It’s triggered a second puberty within my body which is extremely similar to the puberty cis teen girls go through.

I look absolutely nothing like what I did when I was 18. Hormones have done a world of good for me!

The future holds many things that could happen. I’ve yet to decide exactly what to do with my transition. One of the most common things spoken about in regards to transitioning is the ‘sex change operation’, regarded as the ultimate transition.

Some people even consider it a requirement to be considered transitioned. The truth is Genital Reconstructive Surgery (GRS) is for people who want it, and not anyone else.

Many people have preconceptions of what trans people are like without even knowing anything about them. People will talk about how they can tell if someone is trans or not. There are people who outright refuse to accept trans people.

I often hear about and meet people who make the claims that they can always tell when someone is trans. These people talk about trans bodies with little regard to the people who own them.

They talk about subtle hints that betray the truth about us as if we are puzzles to be sorted out, a spot the difference if you will, of things that men’s and women’s bodies have.

There are people who, without knowing us, like to make claims about our bodies (it’s always about our bodies) suggesting we’re not what we claim to be. These people deliberately gender trans people wrongly because they believe that bodies either cannot be changed, or should not be changed. I can’t presume to know all the reasons why these people hold prejudices against trans people, but more often than not they use them in a misguided attempt to keep cis people safe. For example recent policies in some American states ban the use of bathrooms that do not match the sex marked on your birth certificate. As you can expect this is extremely hard to enforce, and open to interpretation.

- Feminism -

‘They talk about subtle hints that betray the truth about us as if we are puzzles to be sorted out, a spot the difference if you will, of things that men’s and women’s bodies have.’

Recently, a video has gone viral where a cis woman was removed from a public toilet because she was accused of being trans and refused to show ID. Yeah, it’s truly as fascist as it sounds.

Trans bodies aren’t only demonised however, in some cases they are fetishised. My first experience with trans bodies was the concept of transgender porn. Girls with dicks. This alternate “best of both worlds” type thing that takes the autonomy of trans people away and shows them as sex objects that are desirable to primarily straight men who want to fantasise about dicks without having to admit to questioning their sexuality. In the world of trans women men who seek out girls like us are often called Chasers because they desire our bodies without who is attached.

And they often do not understand our bodies beyond the concept of what they look like.

Trans bodies are just like cis bodies, as varied as the individual who owns them. People imagine trans bodies in certain ways; trans women are seen to have bodies like cis men but with breasts, while trans men are often seen as having women’s bodies with binders. The reality is that these descriptions are as full of prejudice as the people who use them. There are as many differences between individual cis women as there are differences between trans women and cis women. And aside from a few differences, the puberty that trans women go through when beginning HRT is the same as the puberty cis women go through.

In my day-to-day life as a trans girl I have many of the same things to deal with as anyone else. I’ve got Uni assignments to work on and classes to attend, I’ve got financial things to sort out (can I afford an extra coffee today or should I top my car’s fuel up?), when was the last time I saw my friends? Do I have enough time to do my makeup before leaving for class? When was the last time I did the dishes or my laundry? But I’ve got a few extra things I need to worry about too. Will someone notice if I don’t shave today? Do these clothes look feminine enough on my body? Will a child ask if I am a boy or a girl? How many people will stare at me on public transport? When I answer the phone will they call me ‘sir’?

It’s another set of draining activities on top of everything else I have to do to get ready for leaving the house. In fact, as someone who suffers from a range of mental illnesses, having to work hard

to keep myself safe when out can push me over the edge. It’s quite regular that I end up staying home on days I’ve had plans to go out. I often leave plans without definite dates and I regularly apologise to friends that I have to cancel plans on. I guess in a way you could call this bailing on social encounters a form of self-care. I feel extremely lucky that although I cancel plans quite often, my friends continue to make an effort to include me and I am still invited to things they have planned or to just hang out.

It’s common knowledge that the rates of mental illnesses in trans people are higher than the average, with studies putting the figures between 30 and 80 percent of trans people suffering from some form of mental illness. Other studies suggest that more than 80 percent of trans people have thought about suicide, and up to 50 percent have actually attempted it. This isn’t to say that being trans is the cause of this, rather the discrimination and exclusion that trans people fall victim to is widely acknowledged as the cause. I can personally attest to this as I fit in with not just the trans people living with a mental illness, but also the figures for thinking about and attempting suicide at some point in my life.

It’s not all bad news though, the studies from the last few years validate what trans people have been saying for years; that allowing trans people to transition and treating them with respect and dignity improves the mental health of trans people, which in turn helps them feel better about themselves and lowers suicide rates. Not only this, but healthcare for trans people is becoming more and more accessible through more doctors and psychiatrists choosing to prescribe and manage hormone levels for trans patients. And more LGBTQIA+ mental health services are opening their doors, while services like the sadly now gutted Safe Schools Coalition project are at some point getting funding. As sad as the gutting of Safe Schools was, there was no national program of the sort previously, showing that the wider community are actually starting to pay attention to LGBTQIA+ issues. So the fact that it was funded at all is something to celebrate.

While some of the opinions and experiences I have written about are shared by other trans people, these ones are my own and do not serve as a description of the things all trans people deal with.

AUTHOR Elle Void, 24, Bachelor of Social Work

If Elle could live in any universe... she’s fairly happy with this one.

15

Creativity Competition Winners: Fiction

1st Place

Suspension Of Thought You wake up—it was a bad dream. You realise you were dreaming but you can’t recall the details. Your mouth is dry, your bladder full. You rise to attend to both those needs. Sleep is elusive upon your return. You don’t wish to lie there in idle quasislumber—you rise to start your day.

for something to read. Nothing but a technical paper that would bore you rigid in thirty seconds.

You resort to your phone and lose yourself in the Scrabble app. Before you know it, whilst wrestling with the best option for playing the Q, your station is announced—phew, made it.

You’re running hard now. The first few kilometres are always a warm-up. Now at the four km mark you’ve cranked up the gears and you’re hitting the road hard. Running hard is good. Keeps you focused. You can’t let your mind wander too far when you’re running at speed. A wandering mind will invariably end in a pothole, a sprain or a tear and cold, bitter tears. A wandering mind is the last thing you want—keep your thoughts martialled.

#

You return from running, ten kms in all, and hit the shower. Dressing for work, you notice the time is just on six a.m.—going to be an early birdy today.

You’re at the office by seven. Plenty of emails keep you busy, focused, until a battery of meetings occupy the rest of your day.

The train rides are the risky times. Squashed in a crush of commuters wired to devices—nobody talks on public transport anymore. Today you savour the minor victory of finding a seat. A large man eating potato chips with reckless gusto sits opposite you. To your left, two schoolgirls occupy the window seats. Their banal chatter blends with the thrum of the engines, punctuated at regular intervals by the crunch of a chip. Nothing here to engage your thoughts. You rummage in your bag

The night, the endless night. The hardest time to hide from yourself and the thoughts you should be thinking. A sad dream curtails your slumber.

You rise from the bed, pace the room, peer out at a streetlight lit streetscape of apartments similar to your own—most blinds drawn against voyeurs and bright light. Somehow you find yourself in the bathroom, peering into the mirror.

‘You look like shit,’ you tell yourself. What you’ve lost in hair follicles, you’ve gained in lines around your eyes and upon your brow. The burden of the un-thought thoughts weighs heavily upon you— body and soul.

Returning to the bedroom, you notice the time on the bedside clock. Is 2.33 a.m. too early for a run?

Probably not, if you’re careful. You rummage in a drawer until you find a miner’s torch. You turn it on to test the battery—a bright LED light is emitted.

Five minutes later you’re down on the street outside your dwelling. You stretch briefly and commence—as is your custom—slowly. The beam from the miner’s torch strapped to your skull cuts a swathe of bright light through the gloom. You

concentrate on your running as you work through the gears. Breathing right? Check! Pace correct?

Check! Any aches or pains? Negative! Proceed to top speed. As you accelerate along the darkened street, you tell yourself to keep your thoughts focussed on the task at hand. The lack of natural light heightens the risk of injury. Stimulated by the exercise, endorphins bubble forth, filling your body with euphoria.

Lulled by the wash of endorphins and seduced by their optimism, your mind drifts to other thoughts.

You can see the solution to the problem that filled most of yesterday. As soon as you reach the office, you will issue instructions that will resolve the matter. You move on to the bars of an old song. A Beatles number which, before you realise, forms a bridge between the resolution of your work problem and the entombed thoughts. She loved that song. She loved many things.

You wrest control of your senses—concentration is key. You make yourself aware of your breathing.

Intake and outtake of air proceeding smoothly. You check again for any signs of aches and pains and find none. You think of her breathing.

You’re getting irritated with your waning concentration. You rebuke yourself, ‘Get a grip!’ you shout internally.

Arms held close to your chest, knees rising and falling—feet drumming a steady tattoo. You turn the corner and descend towards the beach. On cue, a salty wind assails your nostrils.

You reach the beach within minutes. It is deserted as expected—no wayward revellers on a week night. The tide is turning but still too far out for anglers. Just you, sand, rocks, salt, seaweed and water. You run through the sand towards the sea.

You run along the water’s edge for two hundred metres. There was a time when you often did this together. Before she gave up on running, before she gave up on...

You veer into the water and run against the oncoming waves. The miner’s torch illuminates a narrow corridor. You run against the deepening water until the weight of it holds you inert. You’re in deep now. Your feet inconsistently touch the sand. Your light sporting apparel feels like house bricks. You know you should be extricating yourself before this becomes a predicament. You could swim back to a safe depth quite easily. You relax for the first time in months. You feel calm as the water warms the outside of your body. You open your mouth and allow the water in. ###

AUTHOR Richard Falkner, 52—not out, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Creative Writing) If Richard could live in any fictional world, it would be in the library of Unseen University, Ankh Morpork, Discworld to literally hang around with the librarian, Ook.

17

The Dream Ash, it’s time you stop doing this…

Ash clicks the left mouse button. The unit in his game moves.

This was a waste of time…

The unit clashes with a city tile. Smoke billows from the city as the unit enters.

You had all the time in the world to do this when you were younger…

‘Suck it Babylon,’ he says. He stands up and sticks his middle finger up at the screen.

2nd Place

He takes in a deep breath. ‘It’s only a game,’ he says. His heart rate slows down.

Doing this isn’t going to pay your bills…

He wipes his eye and looks at the Word icon. ‘Might as well start now.’

It’s not going to get you a house…

He presses the Word icon and brings up a blank document.

And it’s certainly never going to get you a girlfriend…

You’re twenty-six now and have done nothing with your life…

‘Now what was that idea I had earlier?’ He says to himself.

He laughs and sits down. He moves his mouse and presses the end turn button.

No girl would want to date a failure like you…

All you do is read books and play video games…

Babylonian units advance on him. They wipe half his invasion force out.

I really don’t know why you started doing it in the first place…

The blood from his face drains as planes fly towards his cities.

Why couldn’t you do something more useful…

Numerous mushroom clouds cover his cities. Half his units vanish too in the process.

You could’ve been a businessman or a teacher…

He lowers his head and a tear falls from his eye. ‘That just didn’t happen.’

You could’ve had a full-time job and your own house by now…

He closes his eyes in an attempt to remember it.

You may not like what I’m able to say, Ash… He opens his eyes and a smile returns to his face. ‘Yes, that’s what it was.’

I think it’s time you give up your dream of being a writer…

He begins typing away.

It’s time you got yourself a real job…

This idea is perfect, he thinks. This will show Mum why I shouldn’t give up writing.

And start living in the real world… # This story is terrible…

More enemy units appear at his borders to add insult to injury.

Ash can’t believe his imagination was capable of this sort of story.

You could’ve had a girlfriend by now as well…

Your characters have no motivation whatsoever…

He looks up and glares at the screen. ‘Fuck you Babylon!’

‘Wow,’ he says. ‘I’m only two hundred words in and it’s already amazing.’

But no, you don’t have any of that…

He quits to the desktop.

You’re still dreaming for that day to happen…

The game vanishes. A map of mountains covers the screen.

It’s time to wake up from fantasy land Ash… ‘Stupid fucking game,’ he says, ‘I don’t know why I keep fucking playing it.’

That day isn’t going to come…

Your story is filled with every cliché possible…

I need a bit of music to help craft this world more, he thinks.

This is the worst grammar I’ve ever seen…

He stops typing and minimises the document. He clicks on the iTunes icon.

You tell too much rather than show…

He scrolls through his music library. He hovers the mouse over David Bowie.

The world you’ve created isn’t realistic enough…

He thinks for a moment. Should I go Bowie or Led Zeppelin?

I really can’t say anything good about this story…

He scrolls down to the Led Zeppelin section. He selects ‘The Battle of Evermore’.

They refuse to quieten down, instead becoming louder and more numerous.

Most of all, they want a story that explores a character…

The urge to scream comes when they start calling him a failure.

Rather than one driven by plot…

Every aspect of it is awful…

He bares his teeth as the voices swirl around in his head.

This will help me with the fantasy world, he thinks. He returns to Word.

Ash, if you want to succeed in writing stories…

I don’t know anyone who’d want to read this sort of stuff…

The words flow as he types away.

I’m beginning to wonder why you’re still here…

His fingers come to an abrupt stop. His smile fades as he looks over what he’s written.

You’ll never be up to our standards…

The things his writing group had said return as he looks at the words.

He growls as blood rushes to his face.

You should start writing serious fiction…

‘Shut the fuck up,’ he screams.

It will help you become a more respected writer…

He gets up and goes outside, clutching his pounding head at the same time.

And help your countless other problems as well… #

Give this up and go do something you’ll actually be good at…

They’re all right you know…

Their criticisms invade his brain, stabbing at it with spears.

Ash lies down in his hammock outside, rubbing his pulsing temples.

People don’t want fantasy tales anymore…

His heart begins thumping against his ribcage.

There’s enough of them on the shelves right now, we don’t need anymore…

He looks at his fingers. They want to type, but the brain invaders aren’t allowing them.

People don’t want those horror stories either…

The brain invaders begin screaming the writing group’s comments at him.

It’s a dead genre that no one cares about anymore…

A tear falls from his eye. ‘Shut up,’ he says.

People nowadays want stories that will change their outlook on life…

The screams repeat in his mind. Some of the invaders are laughing at him now.

You’re not the great writer you make yourself out to be…

He couldn’t type the story anymore; the voices wouldn’t allow him to continue.

No one wants to read your stories…

I really thought that was my golden story, he thinks while rubbing his temples.

Your stories are trash that the world is better without…

Just the single thought of his story made the pain pulsate from his brain.

As a matter of fact, no one likes reading books anymore…

Beads of sweat fell from his forehead as the afternoon sun hit his skin.

Everyone’s too busy to care about them nowadays…

They want stories that explore the human condition…

He takes in deep breaths to try and stop the tears in his eyes from falling out.

He rubs his fingers against his pounding skull. ‘Shut up,’ he says.

They’re a medium that’s better off not existing…

They want stories that have literary merit…

I should’ve continued playing Civ, he thinks. At least I somewhat

1919

matter in that game.

Mum’s right; you’re wasting your life with this writing dream…

Thinking about the game felt like a railway spike being hammered into his skull.

‘Not everyone can be a writer like you…’

He tries to speak, but can’t find the right words.

‘That makes you unique in this world…’

You should’ve applied for a business or an education degree…

The colour disappears from his skin as he moves his mouth. No words come out.

‘Fuck it,’ he says. He closes his eyes in an attempt to clear his mind.

‘The world needs minds like yours more than ever now…’

At least you would’ve gotten a well-paying job and respect…

Tears fall from his eyes as he takes in deep breaths.

He finally speaks. ‘W…what’s going on?’

‘Don’t listen to what others say what you should do…’

Then you would’ve been able to afford your own house…

His ghost continues to stand where it is. It holds a hand out to him.

‘Toughen up princess,’ he tells himself. ‘Life’s not fair and you shouldn’t cry over it.’

‘This is your life, do what you wish with it…’

And maybe even have a girlfriend by now…

Saying those words cause more tears to fall.

His pulsing mind begins to soothe.

‘Your writing group doesn’t appreciate your work…’

‘Yeah,’ he says. ‘That’s why I left it in the end.’

Your writing group is right too…

His lungs tighten and snot blocks his nose.

‘Your mum doesn’t understand how difficult it is to be a writer…’

He wipes away the remaining tears. ‘Yeah, I know she doesn’t.’

You’re a terrible writer…

‘Toughen up, Princess,’ he says again.

No one in their right mind likes the sort of stories you write…

He rubs his hand across his tearstained cheeks. His eyes are stinging.

‘Don’t give up on your writing dream, Ash…’ His horror dies down. ‘I won’t.’

‘Turn the negatives around and make them positive ones…’

He smiles again. ‘I will.’

So take everyone’s advice…

‘Prove to yourself that you can do this…’

‘I fucken said toughen up, Princess,’ He yells. ‘No one gives a fuck if you’re upset.’

He feels joy running through his whole body. ‘I will.’

Give up your dream of being a writer…

He hears a voice. ‘Don’t let the negative thoughts get to you, Ash.’

‘Show to yourself you can fulfil your writing dream…’

The figure points towards the wall of his house.

Go type up your resume…

‘Go there now and pick up the tool you’ll use to change those people...’

His tears stop and he looks up. The voice sounds like his.

He walks over to where the ghost was pointing.

Go get yourself a proper job…

‘Pick it up and make them know you won’t take their negativity…’

Ash turns to his right. His eyes widen as he glimpses at a figure standing beside him.

‘I will.’ He smiles again as he picks up the axe.

‘Show them that you are a great writer…’

And start living in the real world… # ‘You’re not worthless Ash…’ The figure is him. It has a ghostly appearance and is wearing the same clothes as him.

‘You have a talent that many people aspire to have…’

Gooseflesh covers his skin as he looks at his ghost self. Its lips were sewn shut.

Drool falls from his mouth as he hunches over. ‘I’ll show them I’m a great writer.’

‘Excellent…’

###

AUTHOR Camerone Lowe, 21, Bachelor of Creative Arts Honours (Creative Writing) If he could live in any fictional universe, Cameron says “I’d love to live in the Doctor Who universe so I can travel to the many different worlds :) ”

Poetry: Shielded from the rain Beneath my umbrella I am safe.

Safe from all the torment on the outside.

Outside it is dark and dreary.

Dreariness is where hate and fear breed, Breed discontent into the world A world in which I no longer belong.

1st Place

Belonging is a strange thing.

A thing I can only watch, Watch from behind a veil The veil that separates us from them.

They are kept separate for our good, For your good, and yours.

You are just another somebody— Somebody who will shun me.

For me, watching is hard.

Hard because I was once one of you.

You play like I played and I played like you.

You who now cannot see me, cannot hear me.

My screams are like wind to you now.

Now it is the umbrella I hide beneath.

Kayla Gaskell

Cloudburst I knew that the storm would come when your time was done But I had no anticipation of the sky’s precipitation That your absence, this pain, would crack black clouds and pelt rain; Rain that pooled into a sea where sorrows tried to capsize me

2nd Place

I tried breathing in air—fresh air—but choked on the rain vapour So I just floated there, in the downpour, in a sodden boat of old newspaper But while I was thrashing, splashing, in the deep blue-verdancy Sinking deeper and still deeper—I felt my skin caressed by luminosity I saw a light, ethereal and bright, shining from the shore Swimming with rekindled hope, I reached the dry, sandy floor And as I knelt there, immersed, in the slanting sheets of cloudburst I realised that rain is fleeting, but memories and light are forevermore.

Leeza-Jayde von Aplen

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21

Visual Arts

Visual Art: Second Prize Faded by Amber Hall

- Features -

The Ripple Effect How much control, if any, do we exert over our own lives?

Are you a believer in coincidence? For you, life is just a series of random events occurring without rhyme or reason. You got the same wallpaper as your best friend’s mother-in-law? Coincidence. Your long-lost brother, missing in action for the past few months, just happens to knock on the door at the same time as you were thinking about him? Again, coincidence. One thing leads to another and, well, shit just happens.

Ripple Effect involves viewing time as a spiral. It means accepting a multitude of different possibilities for what we think of as our reality.

Think about it; everything we say and do creates a multitude of pathways. We choose to react in a certain way, go down a certain road, and eventually this choice creates its own set of choices… and so it goes. Standing at the crossroads, each of us has the power to create a multitude of new pathways that have infinite possibilities.

Or maybe you lean more towards a belief in destiny? Things don’t just occur for no reason. Experiencing a string of ‘seemingly there’?

Is there some connection between you and this woman that will play out, now that the chain of events has been put into play? Nothing just happens by chance. Surely it must be preordained. Fate, if you will.

But that’s not all - our pathways branch out, intersecting with or veering away from other people’s, depending on which choices we all make. Other people’s decisions affect which path we end up following. Even if we never meet, we get caught up in their ripple.

Most of us never even consider the repercussions, never realise how far our ripples will reach into other people’s lives; it is cause and effect at play on a huge scale. Innumerable everyday decisions in different parts of the world at different points in time, coming together to shape one-out-of-a-million possible realities.

We’ve all heard stories like the guy and girl who met and fell in love on-board a cruise to Antarctica. They had never met, even after living in the same neighbourhood for years. You could view this as a random series of events, just happenstance that two people from the same locality went on a holiday to an unlikely location at the same time. Or, maybe you could wonder about the soul mates who are meant to be together, finally meeting when their paths converge on the shuffleboard deck. Which view do you take? Of course, you could argue that it doesn’t have to be one or the other. Why can’t some things in life be chance and others be fate? Because they can’t, that’s why. You don’t get to pick and choose. And if it’s one or the other, how much control, if any, do we exert over our own lives?

I don’t believe in either, although I used to believe a little in both.

But, like I said, it doesn’t work that way. I never thought it always rained after I’d washed the car; I had simply decided to wash it on the same day Mother Nature gave us a day off from watering the garden. It was just a coincidence! On the other hand, I also wanted to believe in destiny. The handsome stranger who stopped to help was Mr. Right. We might never have met if my car hadn’t broken down on that particular night in that particular middle of nowhere the same night my soul mate just happened to be lost in that same middle of nowhere! I was meant to marry this man, have those particular children, live that particular life.

But here’s a different way of viewing things. I call it ‘The Ripple Effect’. Coincidence and destiny both necessitate a view of time as linear and reality as having an element of reliability to it. The

This is a much nicer way to look at things, don’t you agree? It gives us a modicum of control, plus we have the added advantage of uncertainty thrown in so that things don’t get boring. Coincidence is too random for someone accused of being a control freak (who, me?)

And if fate isn’t chance, then surely it has to be planned. If that’s the case, who or what is doing this preparation? Who’s pulling the strings, acting on our behalf as our personal puppet master? Again, the control freak in me is affronted; if anyone’s doing the planning, then I want some input into how things are going to play out.

Okay, enough! These uncertainties really have no definitive answer. And anyway, who really cares? It got me thinking though.

Driving home one dark, rainy night, I found myself at a crossroads, metaphorically and literally. As I sat there I pondered: ‘Should I keep going straight ahead like I usually do, or will I turn and take the short cut along a different route?’ It was then that I realised how all this musing has robbed me of the ability to make even the simplest of decisions. Down which road does my fate await me?

There are consequences for each of our actions, be they random or foreordained.

AUTHOR Amanda Sloan, 50, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Creative Writing)

Amanda would love to live in the fictional universe of Lord of the Rings so she could get up close and personal with Aragorn (well, Viggo Mortensen in any role would do actually)

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x o v

1. A bake sale! Especially if lemon slice is involved.

1. A fire sale, because fire.

2. Sure, they are letting Trump round them up, right?

3. Free hugs FTW

4. Personally I’m a fan of balance so I think there should be one on each side of the bed.

5. Brooklyn Nine-Nine 6. In principle everyone should be allowed to run for PM, but at the moment it is more important that young people go out and vote at all so that they aren’t shafted every time something needs to get cut from the budget.

Michael PhD

2. Yes, but not angrily please.

1. The type where things are And not if they try and pass the discounted. off as facts.

2. Yes, as long as I agree.

3. Me. But $50 for an extra hour.

4. I’m lucky to get 20 minutes.

5. Friends - because 6. Sure, it would be the perfect platform for Delta Goodrem to promote her new, upcoming album.

Jordon Creative Writing

3. Other than ET parties?

Probably hugs. I bloody love a good hug.

4. They’re a great way to bring great music and economic stimuli to rural Australia.

5. Seinfeld - or Mad About You. That was pretty great.

6. My heart says yes but my head says no. Because I feel like it would give people like Pauline Hanson and Mark Latham the change to extend their 15 minutes.

Lauren ARTS (Drama and History)

Q.

1. WHAT’S YOUR FAVOURITE KIND OF SALE? 2. SHOULD PEOPLE BE ALLOWED TO VOICE UNPOPULAR OPINIONS? 3. IF THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE, WHAT IS THE BEST OF THOSE FREE THINGS? 4. WHAT IS YOUR OPINION ON ONE-NIGHT-STANDS? 5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SITCOM? 6. SHOULD WE HAVE A FREE ELECTION WHERE ANYONE CAN BE NOMINATED TO BE PM REGARDLESS OF IF THEY’RE IN A PARTY OR NOT?

pop 1. Anime sale.

1. You can’t go past Cherrios, half price. Damn shit is the King, better than Special K. 2. Damn skippy! Of course.

3. It costs nothing to dress up as Batman and go around beating up clowns shouting “Where are they?”

4. Great concert, especially when RUFUS played at Mildura.

5. Gone Girl 6. Everyone would in effect vote for Lee Lin Chin (GLORY TO THE SUPREME LEADER).

Aden Digital Media

2. Yes...but sometimes the ‘freedom of speech’ argument can be used to help silence oppressed minorities.

Unpopular opinions on anime are all fine.

3. animelab.com free anime yassss.

4. Assuming the one-night stand is consequence free (STIs etc) I don’t have an opinion. I’d rather watch anime tbh.

5. Please Like Me or Osomatsusan 6. Yeah, it’d probably be as much of a mess but at least you don’t need to be super rich or powerful as a prerequsite. I would hope that they at least like anime.

Emma Digital Media

1. Any, really.

2. Yes if they must. Doesn’t mean they can’t be told to shut up.

3. Money. Free money’s pretty good.

4. Go for your life.

5. The Office, or Seinfeld, or Parks and Rec, or Arrested Development, or Community.

(Pick any, it’s a five-way) 6. Yes. So that we aren’t forced to choose the lesser of two evils.

Brenton 25 Arts (HISTORY) 25

- Cooking -

Pocketchange Financiers

The ‘French at Flinders’ club does a lot of eating. I’m going to share with you the recipe of one of the lovely cakes we eat in our club. More commonly known as friands, financiers are small, sweet, dense almond cakes. These are traditionally made in a rectangular block shape but for this recipe they can be made in a regular cupcake tin. In Australia, friands are made in oval moulds but for the French these are traditionally savoury; financiers are the sweet ones. The main difference between recipes is making a beurre noisette (butter that is cooked until it turns brown), giving it that extra depth of flavour. But if you can’t be bothered there’s no harm in just melting your butter to a regular colour in the microwave. You can add any flavouring you have and, as far as topping goes, add whatever chocolate or fruit you like.

Makes 12 Ingredients: 160 grams of unsalted butter 1/3 cup (50 grams) of plain flour 1 cup (120 grams) of icing sugar 1 packed cup (100 grams) of almond meal A pinch of salt 1/2 teaspoon of Almond extract (or any extract you have – even Frangelico works if you have any) 6 small (or 5 large) egg whites A cup of frozen (or fresh) berries or chocolate pieces *You can also add some orange or lemon zest to your dry ingredients to give it an extra kick

- Cooking -

Pantry Method: Preheat oven to 180C (160C fan forced) Step 1 Begin by preparing the beurre noisette. In a small saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat. It will start browning when it’s bubbling and will smell a bit like a cheese toastie. You want your butter to become brown and move past cheesy to smell like pastry or biscuits. It doesn’t matter how brown the butter gets just as long as you don’t let it become black. Set aside to cool.

Step 2 Take your baking tin and spray lightly with oil (if you don’t have spray oil you can rub melted butter all around the sides and the bottom - just make sure you get the creases). Take half a teaspoon of flour in each mould and tap the tray loosely coating all sides with flour. This stops the financiers from sticking when they’re cooked.

Step 3 In a large bowl mix flour, icing sugar, almond meal and salt with a whisk. Make a well and add the egg whites, cooled butter and

almond extract. Mix until just combined (Try not to overmix with any batter that has flour in it otherwise you’ll end up with a really tough cake).

Step 4 Add three heaped tablespoons of batter into each mould. Sprinkle your fruit over the top of the batter, pushing them in a little so they soften into the mixture as it bakes.

Bake for 20 minutes or until a skewer comes out clean.

Set a timer so you don’t forget about them!

If you want to top with almond flakes, sprinkle them on halfway through baking.

Allow to cool and there you have it! Bon appétit!

Join us on Facebook @Frenchatflinders CHEF / AUTHOR Xarchaeceya, 20, Bachelor of Arts (Creative Writing and Psychology)

If she could live in any fictional universe, Xarchaeceya replied that she wouldn’t as ‘I accept reality for what it is. There is enough fiction in non-fiction.’

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- Features -

Just vote it. vote it good.

V

x Your simple 5-step guide to fulfilling your democratic responsibility of voting in the upcoming federal election and (kind of) knowing what you’re doing.

Australia will be heading to the polls for a double dissolution election on July 2nd. In basic terms, this means that the government has legislation that it can’t pass, so it’s going to call a special kind of election which puts all senate spots up for renewal to try and flush out their naysayers and up their party’s representation in order to pass this and other legislation more easily in the future.

2. Find out who you side with If you fancy yourself a critical reader, you can probably dissect the parties’ advertising and figure out what’s legit and what’s just spin (hint: most of it). But why would you bother when there are so many tools out there to cut through the codswallop and figure out which party your opinions align with? Thanks, internet! ‘Vote Compass’ and ‘I Stand With’ are the best two.

But unless you’re an Auspol nerd like me, you’re probably not interested in the details. You just know you have to vote, and you want to be in and out with the unique satiation that can only come from an Election Day snag. But unfortunately every right comes with a responsibility, and it’s your responsibility to know what you’re voting for when you number those boxes. Here are my tips for the most straightforward way to do it.

3. Research your local candidates (House of Reps and Senate) In case you didn’t know, in our political system you actually vote for local members of a party, not the Prime Minister. If you want to make sure you’re casting your vote to someone who may actually represent your interests and advocate for South Australian issues, look into how the candidates for your area vote.

1. Read up In the lead-up to the campaign, you’re bound to be bombarded with TV ads, mailouts, Facebook campaigns, all telling you to VOTE FOR THIS PERSON OR AUSTRALIA WILL TURN TO SHIT. Pay no mind to anything that comes from an actual party or minister and choose some reputable news sources to get your info.

My top picks, for what it’s worth, are The Guardian, the ABC and Crikey, but if you must go for something commercial, at least have a flick through your parents’ copy of The Weekend Australian or tune in to The Project (a.k.a. Behind the News for grownups).

Key issues to consider: unions, banks, education funding, economic growth and jobs, taxes, and the environment.

‘They Vote For You’ is the tool you need for this one. Just pop in your postcode and it’ll tell you how your current MP votes. Then you can say yay or nay, and if the case is nay, shop around for someone new.

4. Sort out the logistics There are also some practical considerations you’ll need to make when it comes to Double-D-Day. Where are you going to vote, and when? Don’t forget to take into consideration prime bake-sale or sausage sizzle locations and times. I seem to remember some champ compiling a list of these kinds of important things last election, but sadly I was overseas and couldn’t make the most of it.

Speaking of being away, if you’re going to be out of the country or unable to make it to a polling booth on the day of the election, there’s a few ways you can make sure your vote is still counted. You can lodge an early

vote at early polling stations or you can send a postal vote. Check the AEC website for all the particulars.

5. On the day…

So you’ve made it to the polling both. Go you! Now all you’ve got to do is fight your way through the super-enthusiastic party campaigners with their how-to-vote cards (hint: you don’t have to follow any of those cards, but you can if you like) and pop some numbers in some boxes. Simple!

While you’re there though, spare a thought for the people actually working to wo/man / person the polling booths. Yeah, they’re getting paid, but they’ve been there since the crack of dawn and they’ll probably be there until well into the night taking votes, counting votes, recounting votes and so on. They’re not representing any party and they honestly couldn’t give a flying you-know-what about which way you vote.

Just do it, be prompt about it and be polite.

And maybe bring them in something from the bake sale or sausage sizzle, because chances are they’re subsisting on whatever they could scrounge from the back of their cupboard that morning and a couple of shared packets of chips.

Now all that’s left is to sit back and watch the fate of the country unfold in front of you! But at least you can do so knowing you’ve played your part in it.

AUTHOR Lauren Reid, 21, Arts (High Achievers) Drama and History.

If Lauren could live in any fictional world, it would be Stars Hollow of Gilmore Girls.

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The ROYAL HEIRHEADS

- Features -

E

E W Y H

W

TH D E E

N

, R E V E N S E A H U T E RG R A O N M SE S W I E O R N A I G R GEO

‘Ever get the feeling you’ve been cheated? Good night!’ As South Australia seems to be on the verge of total economic collapse, with nothing but hollow ideas and meaningless pleasantries issued in condolence from our elected representatives, those words issued

by Johnny Rotten at the conclusion of the Sex Pistols final concert almost forty years ago seem more relevant than ever. We’ve been cheated so regularly by our politicians, that I was cheated out of cheering when that onion-eating, progress-fearing philistine was forced out of office. Because he wasn’t voted out by the people, and despite how viciously ignorant he was it was still the final nail in the coffin of my illusion that there are any actual human beings in parliament. They’re all soulless, brain dead, barbarians who seem to suffer from a tunnel vision that allows them to see nothing beyond the next election. And now, Adelaide is being likened to Detroit , and so in lieu of any governmental solutions I’m not going to spend the next 1200 words bitching about the politics of it all, instead I’m going to write about a band so filled with humanity that they threw all the hideousness and injustice of our society and politics back in our faces; The Sex Pistols.

They were the most infamous gang of teenagers to ever pick up a guitar, who were simultaneously accused of being a voice for and exploiter of the disaffected youth of London. It was 1977 that the band exploded onto the scene, and with this detonation of uncompromising honesty and bravery, the establishment of both a political and musical nature, was sent into an unprecedented (and unmatched) moral panic. Forty years on and the Sex Pistols still remain a touchstone for anarchists the world over. Because with their core nihilist message that you should never allow yourself to believe that our society is anything more than a sick joke, they expressed the fear and disillusionment of their generation along with each succeeding one.

The irony of The Sex Pistols is that they were founded on a totally capitalist intent by Malcom McLaren, who formed the band with the idea that they would promote the clothes that his girlfriend Vivienne Westwood made for their shop SEX. But the reason that The Sex Pistols didn’t fade into obscurity as the pre-cursor to the modern day norm of manufactured, economically-driven musical

acts is because the intentions of the working-class band members were far purer in their aspirations. The original line-up consisted of Johnny Rotten (John Lydon), Glen Matlock, Steve Jones, and Paul Cook who bonded over a shared hostility for an increasingly impoverished England and disco music.

This mutual aggression would see the first public appearance of The Sex Pistols also become their coup de grace, when on December 1st 1976, they replaced Queen on The Bill Grundy Show. What followed was a disgrace of an interview during which Bill Grundy spent all his time goading illicit and incendiary responses out of the band. The interview caused an inevitable, and absolute, pandemonium, with the media focusing only on their image, resulting in EMI dropping The Sex Pistols. It also made the band decide that they wanted to release an album on an antithetical basis as it was now clear that no one else wanted this to occur. But before this could happen Matlock left the band, and his vacancy was filled by Sid Vicious, esteemed by many to the epitome of punk rock; a violent alcoholic bassist, who was unable to play bass, and who died of a heroin overdose at age 21 after he was accused of killing his girlfriend Nancy Spungen.

Under Virgin Records, The Sex Pistols would finally release their first and only album, Never Mind the Bollocks. It was full of satire, pathos and ‘changed everything. There had never been anything like it before and really there’s never been anything quite like it since. ’ One of the most notorious songs on the record was ‘Bodies’, which is about a girl who Johnny Rotten knew who turned up at his doorstep one night with a fetus in a clear bag. As Rotten explained, ‘That song was hated and loathed, it’s not anti-abortion, it’s not pro-abortion…don’t be callous like that with a human being but don’t be limited by such a thing as morals either, cause its immoral to bring a kid into this world and not give a toss about it. ’ But even more infamous was the album title itself. Steve Jones suggested ‘never mind the bollocks’, which is an old working class catchphrase meaning ‘stop talking rubbish’. Controversy about the profanity of the title led to a court case, which The Sex Pistols would win.

As Rotten also explained, ‘How can you ban language, words, how are words offensive? And why should I have to tolerate your interpretation? I’m the one using the word, ask me how I’m using

- Features -

it—don’t tell me. And if you don’t like the way I’m using it, so what, it’s my right, it’s my freedom of expression, without that we’re nothing but slaves. My language so fuck off! ’ But The Sex Pistols’ unquestionable magnum opus was their rendition of God Save the Queen, which served as an attack on the pointless grandeur of the royal family which coexisted in a country where economically the working class bore the financial burden despite their limited opportunities. Due to the anti-establishment rhetoric of the song, it was heavily censored and yet still the song hit the Billboard Chart with a blank spot at Number One. Given how intertwined the British Royal Family is with the identity of Britain, some considered the song an attack on England, but Johnny Rotten explained the song by saying that far from being a criticism of the English race, it is a defense of them against their mistreatment and exploitation at the hands of the monarchy.

Despite this the band was still unable to play on land, which gave McLaren the publicity spectacle of an idea to ‘put them on a bloody boat, and follow the Queen’s flotilla.’ Although this event was broken up by the police, and the royal family has given up some of their more grandiose possessions such as their flotilla, as the Royal Heirheads continue unquestioned through their lives filled with a pointless parade of expensive clothes, tours and well—parades, I can’t help but feel that forty-years later we need The Sex Pistols more than ever before. Least of all because twenty years ago when Johnny Rotten was asked his opinions of the Royal Family he answered; ‘My attitude about them now would be to sell them off to Disneyland. ’ The Sex Pistols final concert occurred on January 14th,1978 at the legendary Winterland in San Francisco. And with that the band, and the punk movement it had fueled, fizzled out after only a few very raucous and incendiary months. Ultimately it seems that The Sex Pistols failed to change the world because they never sought control, they simply wanted to tear the establishment down, but instead the establishment they so reviled—along with those who never understood the deeper ideology behind putting pins through holes in your jeans—won, by not only surviving punk but turning it into a caricature of

itself. But the truth and terror that The Sex Pistols confronted in their music cannot fail to influence those who understand it.

Particularly as the political agenda seems to only be growing with its ‘vileness, nonsense, stupidity, lying and deceit…[from] modern politicians [who come across]… as uneducated morons.’

With the intentional immorality that we are delivered from so called ‘Honourable’ and moralist politicians, who can’t yearn for the morality taught by a band disguised as immoral scum whose musical message was to ‘bloody learn to love each other properly.

Cause you only get one go at it. ’ P.S. On 24 February 2006, The Sex Pistols—John Lydon, Glen Matlock, Steve Jones, Paul Cook and Sid Vicious—were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but they refused to attend the ceremony, calling the museum ‘a piss stain.’

AUTHOR Georgia Reissen, 20, Bachelor of Arts

If Georgia could live in any fictional universe it would be the galaxy from Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy, because in the choice between Malcom Turnbull and Bill Shorten, she’ll have Zaphod Beeblebrox.

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hidden gems Marino - Hallet Cove Board Walk The Marino board walk or also known as, ‘The Marion Walking Coastal Trail’, is one of the most incredible suburban coastal walks in South Australia, and it’s right on our doorstep. The walk starts from The Esplanade in Marino, and finishes at Hallett Cove. This length of this walk in 7.2km, and you should allow yourself 2.5-3 hours if you want to walk all of it. However, you do not have to walk all 7.2km, you can walk 5km or even just 1km, depending on how much time you have and how much exercise you are up for.

There are several other recommended walks and a map, which can be found at, www.marion.sa.gov.au/ There are so many breathtaking views on this coastal walk, which you would not normally see if you were driving along the coast.

The trail can be quite steep at times, and there are quite a lot of stairs that you have to climb, but trust me - it is worth it!

Whenever I have done this walk, I have always gone with a friend, and it is such a great way to socialise and keep fit (which are two of my favourite things). When I have talked to other people about the board walk, they too have also gone with a friend, but it is still a nice walk to do by yourself. You can take dogs on the walk; however as mentioned before, it is quite steep, so I recommend it for bigger dogs. I am a person who likes to exercise alone, as I can concentrate more on achieving my goals, but with this walk I definitely prefer going with a friend.

If you are stressed with uni work, work and life, instead of procrastinating, just do this walk, as it is a great way to clear your head and you feel like you have done something productive with your day – as opposed to just watching TV shows or sitting on your phone all day, feeling guilty when it comes around to the evening because you have not done much with your day.

Friendship is such an important thing in life and having supportive friends, is what helps to make everyday life and uni life so much easier, so as I said before, I recommend taking a friend, and just getting everything off of your chest. For those of you who just want to scream and let off some steam, this is the perfect place to do it, as it is secluded and it can get quite windy, so the wind will just drown out your screams anyway.

There is a café at the Hallett Cove end of the boardwalk, so make sure you have some cash with you, and have a nice iced cold drink or a coffee/hot chocolate to reward yourself for all of your great work—after all, you deserve it!

AUTHOR Ashley Curtis, 21, Bachelor of International Tourism

If Ashley could live in a fictional world, it would be Narnia, because who doesn’t want to ride a talking lion and befriend a faun named Mr Tumnus?

- Get Smart -

Home Truths The wonderful thing about university is that it can be a place of reinvention. As I walk around Flinders these days (seriously – I never seem to leave this place) I see a huge amount of diversity.

Different cultures, different experiences, different interests.

And I’m not going to lie – I was especially happy to see that age doesn’t seem to be the barrier I thought it might be. Though I’m at least several decades away from retirement – especially in this economy, auugh—I am a fair chunk of years further along the road than most of Flinders’ student body.

My first experience of the difference my age brought to the table was last year, during a history topic. We covered the fall of the Berlin Wall. All good, until I realised most of the class were talking about it in the same disconnected way someone might talk about World War I, or desegregation— important historical events, sure, but something that happened in the ‘before’. And then there was me, who remembered watching the Wall come down as a ten-year-old, years before most of the class were even born.

Apart from the crushing realisation that I was as old as dirt by comparison, I managed to use the information to my advantage, cruising towards a HD for the topic.

But it made me wonder. As a culture, we’re terrified about growing older. We diet, inject, surgically-enhance and gloss our way to perfection because magazines and television tell us that we should look, act and feel young.

Youth is the ultimate currency, and the overwhelming message seems to be that your dollar value drops with each passing year.

Well, I call bullshit on that.

As demoralising as the physical changes of getting older can be, the rewards are far greater. The greatest lessons of my life were learned after the age of 30. Here are a few.

I’m a better judge of character.

At 18, having friends to hang out with was vitally important. I stayed longer in toxic friendships, and put up with an awful lot of narcissistic, manipulative behaviour from people around me who believed success in life meant retaining their positions at the top of the social heap. One of the best days of my adult life was ditching a particularly damaging friendship—and I walked away with a light heart, knowing I had stumbled across some sort of magic formula for platonic relationships. These days, while generous with my time, I don’t compromise my own convictions for anyone. The litmus test of friendships is this—the people who have your best interests at heart value this conviction. Those are the people to invest in.

I understand that no relationship is perfect.

In the film Crazy Stupid Love, Steve Carell’s character Cal says something that I love. In describing his estranged wife, he says, ‘I have loved her even when I hated her... only married couples will understand that one...’ Allowing for the substitution of marriage with any long-term relationship, he’s dead on. I’ve been married for a long time. I’ve loved my husband every day, but some of those days I haven’t particularly liked him—and I’m sure he’d have no hesitation saying the same! Love and frustration are not mutually exclusive. Your partner has their faults, just as you do.

Understanding this distinction goes a long way toward making a relationship awesome.

It’s okay not to know what you want from life at 18…but it’s still good to make goals.

I sure as hell didn’t. I rolled out of bed one day in a complete funk and made a series of really stupid life decisions that didn’t begin to right themselves until I was in my late twenties. I had no idea what I wanted to be ‘when I grew up’. I thought I’d burned too many bridges. The best advice I can give here is that there is always a step you can take to get you closer to your goals. You might have to walk for a long time before you find another bridge (or you might have to build a new one yourself) but complacency will steal years away faster than anything else. I took the construction route—I decided on a plan and worked away at it. I’m still not there, but I’m closer than I was five years ago.

I have a finite amount of f*cks to give—and I use them sparingly.

The fantastic thing about being older is that I genuinely spend less time giving a shit about things or people who don’t matter. Messy ponytail, daggy clothes? Pffft, who cares? Group texts falling silent? Well, everyone’s probably busy—I’ll go and see a movie by myself or curl up with a book or re-watch some Game of Thrones.

Knowing you can go days without feeling the need to ‘check in’ to your social group is great. Realising you can pick up where things left off without the drama that plagues your late teens and early twenties is even better.

Let’s be honest—physically, I’m different than I was at 18 (sorry folks, kids tend to do that to you—Godspeed). That’s okay. I earned it. But the best thing about getting older is actually the mental maturity that you get to acquire along the way.

I could do without the mortgage though.

AUTHOR Karen Smart, ‘On the flip side of 30’, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Creative Writing) If Karen could live in any universe, it would be the 18th Century Scottish highlands ala Outlander.

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T J k s A Love-life got you down? Got a problem that no amount of therapy or booze will fix? Fear no more for JT is here to answer all your burning questions.

Help JT! The librarians keep sending me threatening emails and demanding money I don’t have! Sure, maybe I’ve had some of these books for almost a year, but I still NEED them and it’s not like anyone else is studying 12th century Welsh dressmaking.

If I give them back now the books will just sit on their dusty old shelves. What’s the difference if they’re sitting on MY dusty old shelf? They’ll get them back when my thesis is done!

What can I do to stop them breaking my knee-caps?

- Eternal Postgrad Dear my new favourite oxymoron Eternal Postgrad, unfortunately libraries—like a certain writer who has been let down by every guy he’s dated—have trust issues that we must accept. Consider the Librarian—undoubtedly one of the most enigmatic subset of human. Don’t let their calm demeanour fool you, they are indeed vicious. Quicker to save a tattered James Joyce from fire than their own child.

But I don’t begrudge you for wanting to keep that rare, relevant resource. We search through the unyielding archives of the ironically-titled FindIt@Flinders database for hours before it gives us what we need. Ultimately however, the purpose of the library is lending and to pester you—non-violently at first—to return the books. Also, since you’re studying 19th century Welsh dressmaking; the popularity of that topic ensures that someone will need that very same source very soon.

Sidenote: Consider yourself lucky that I’m studying the 20th century history on German socks—mein idea of kampf-fortable faschist-tion—otherwise I’d have to yank that book out of your possessive hands.

Dear JT, My life is awesome.

- BetterThanU Dear BetterThanU, I think you forgot the question mark at the end so allow me to answer it like it’s there.

Is your life awesome? I don’t know, I think I’m someone one should envy. I’m doing a degree with zero employment prospects. I have immense weight issues. My circle of friends has gotten smaller, unlike the waistband of my jeans. And I have dated so many dead-ends that I’m starting to feel my nickname should be The Maze Runner. And you know how in action films there are those nondescript extras who are just there to be shot or blown up? I watch them now with a sigh of envy. I’m a nondescript extra. When is it going to be my turn?

Whoops, is this an answer or a transcript from one of my therapy sessions? Anyway, I am actually happy that someone can assert that their life is awesome. Perhaps we all need to sit back and realise that in the grand scheme of things, we’ve got it pretty good.

Anyway, talk to you later. Die Hard is on.

Hey JT, I have a YuGiOh fetish that my boyfriend is finding hard to accept.

What should I do about this?

- KaibaLover Ah KaibaLover, a YuGiOh fetish is something anyone can get used to if you play your cards correctly.

There’s a certain point in relationships where you pull aside the curtain to reveal your freaky side on the stage. Not that I’m kinkshaming, but your boyfriend should be exhaling sighs of relief that it was merely an anime character on stage as opposed to feet or an octopus (I’ve seen some things). However, you also need to acknowledge that your boyfriend might need time to get accustomed. You can’t just appear naked before him with your hair— wherever it may be—in pink and yellow zig-zags; you’ve got to do it slowly and gently.

Here are some steps I suggest: 1. Take a deck of UNO cards into bed with you. It will get him used to their presence.

2. Slowly start asking him to call you (endearingly) ‘Yugi’ like one calls their partner ‘honey’ or ‘sweetplum’.

3. Mount a picture of your antagonist Pegasus in every room of your house and brainwash your partner to hate him as much as you do.

4. Once you have established cards, Yugi and your ultimate quest, you shall now be able to successfully enjoy your YuGiOh fetish together.

I’m not a licensed sex therapist but I do believe this could launch my career. You’re welcome.

It really offends me that we have a parent’s room on campus.

Where’s the non-parent’s room? Or the Men’s room, for that matter? Don’t even get me started on the Queer Room. Damn Feminazis and SJW’s are ruining everything!!1!

- MRAGTOW Tell me about it MRAGTOW. I hate how all these entitled minorities think they need a comfortable place to be themselves and feel safe when there are friendly, amicable people like yourselves on campus.

But let’s be real for a moment. You should be thankful there is a Parents’ Room. Nobody wants to see no squalling foetuses nor prepubescent loudmouths on campus disrupting the experience of studying and learning. Between you and me, the Parents’ Room actually has an in-built incinerator in case being around childless, youthful students inspires them to reclaim what they’ve been missing.

Now I’m not going to assume you are a heterosexual Caucasian male because that’s too political and I like to stay Switzerland. But I will assume a straight white boy has written this. Look, if you step outside into general society: there is your Men’s Room. The whole world is a Men’s Room both in its gender bias and the fact that people are willing to piss all over its floors. But to even relinquish one room’s worth of manspace (yes that can be the new meninist hashtag) is such a horrific insult?

I had no idea you felt this way. SJWs and femiNazis please disband.

And change the planet’s name from Earth (because that sounds too feminine and queer) to something straight like Car or Lynx Africa.

Send all your desperate wonderings to empire.times@flinders.edu.au!

ALUMNI INTERVIEW 3: Simon Royal

ET sits down with ABC JOURNALIST simon ROYAL to discuss media, history, and uni Why did you get into journalism?

That’s actually a difficult one. It’s not something I could say I had a life-long dream of doing. I grew up in the country so at first I thought I wanted to be a vet. Then I decided it probably wasn’t much fun spending your life in rubber gloves, up to your armpit in a cow’s bum.

I can’t say it grew out of a huge passion to begin with. By the time I got to university, I was just really interested in being at university.

I spent a year sort of messing around and then realised I really enjoyed it and it grew from there. I didn’t study journalism. I did a Bachelor of Arts in Communication Studies. Then I went to Flinders a few years after I’d finished that. I did some American History as a postgrad in their Diploma of Social Science, which I don’t think they have anymore. That was done purely out of love because I really liked American History and I always think it’s much easier to do something you love doing rather than something you feel like you have to do. Around that period of time, I’d become interested in journalism because a lot of the American History degree focused on early American journalists; people like Walter Lippmann who was incredibly influential and I guess it just grew from there.

I got involved in 5UV as I was interested in radio. Really, what I first set out to do was a special at 5UV for the twenty-fifth anniversary of John F. Kennedy’s death. He was the bit that I was really interested in and I did my thesis on Kennedy’s use of the media. I went and did that and by the time I got to write my thesis as I was doing it part time by that stage, I was already at the ABC. Have you drawn on much of what you learnt in American History?

Oh, God, yes. Absolutely. As I said, I think a knowledge of history is a really important thing and studying it as a discipline. There are also politics and literature in it as well. I think what all of these things do is they give you a sense of how to pick apart an argument and to listen to what people are saying critically. By that I don’t mean being critical and cynical but listening and thinking ‘does this make sense?

What is the evidence for it?’

The old saying is ‘We’re all entitled to our opinion’. There’s a great rejoinder to that, ‘You’re only entitled to what you can argue for’ and a good degree should teach your how to do that, whether you’re a doctor or a lawyer or what have you.

I draw on it [American History] every day. I remember, just by way of example when Twitter came along and politicians were grabbing on to it, the early adopters especially, because they felt that it gave them an opportunity to talk to the people, or at the people, without any interference or it being mediated by journalists. John F. Kennedy made exactly the same argument about television. It was why he adopted television. Back in those days, the balance of power lay with print journalism and he thought he could address the people over and above the heads of the journalists – which may or may not be a good thing – but it’s also not true [and that somehow it’s not what they’ve got to say. There’s an old communication model of sendermessage-receiver but it was the sender and the message that was important, not the receiver.

It’s interesting to note politicians at quite different periods of history being attracted to quite different technologies but the same thing attracts them and that is ‘I get to say exactly what I want without any scrutiny’.

Do you think that’s something consistent, as the politicians seek

out a new channel of communication, it becomes also the place of the journalist?

I think so. I think there’s always this false notion that you can say what you want and people will be dazzled [by] its sheer brilliance, and go ‘Oh my God, I must vote for them’.

It doesn’t work. People aren’t like that. But that’s always the attraction of a new communication technology. They go through periods of maturing. We see incredible back-and-forth between politicians and journalists – careers made and lost on 140 characters.

As I said, I think [media] develop. They’re different in their early stages and people work out what they mean and the technology and our use of it matures. Then something new comes along.

There are similarities in the process, though. Roosevelt did the same with radio.

So it’s a matter of a new frontier?

Yes, to use Kennedy’s term as you just did. That was what he called his administration, the New Frontier.

What would be the highlights that would come to mind from over your career?

I think you’ve got to think of the last story. It makes me sound incredibly like a goldfish but probably a useful attribute. The last one needs to be the highlight, or if the last one was a steaming pile of you-know-what then you can always think back to the one before that. I think otherwise it becomes stale and you shouldn’t be doing it any longer.

People often go ‘who’s the most famous person you’ve spoken to?’ I don’t really think I could answer that. Things change.

There are certain stories that I’ll remember and I’m pleased with the outcomes. I don’t particularly go in for that business of ‘I did this thing here and it resulted in X, Y, and Z’, because it’s just not me.

There are some things I’m more proud of.

Recently one of the things I’ve liked most is a story I wrote for INDaily purely for pleasure – in fact two of them. They were about our dog dying, and a few months later I wrote one about the new dog coming along but also about how I just didn’t expect the grief to be like it was when our first dog went. Nothing had prepared me for what that was going to be like and to write about those sorts of things is really interesting. I was happy with them as pieces of writing and they meant a lot to me. It gives you a different perspective too when you write about your own grief rather than being the interpreter of someone else’s grief which is so much of what we do.

That’s important, but it’s important to remember that other peoples’ grief is their story first rather than yours. You just bask in the reflected glory, not to sound too callous, but that’s what it is.

Were you ever involved in student media when you were at uni?

No, the 5UV stuff was separate. I started that as a volunteer and by that stage I was at Flinders. Sadly I cannot say that I am a graduate of Empire Times. A huge hole in my career but equally I didn’t write for On Dit either. So the short answer is no, I wasn’t really involved in student media.

That’s not to say that student media isn’t important. It’s terribly important for exactly the same things as I was saying.

For the extended interview, go to empiretimes.com.au

35

WHAT THE

FLinders University Clubs

flinders cinephile society As Paul Kelly once sang ‘Rally round the drum…’, because in this free for all, the best things in life are free issue, I want to beat the drum long and loud for a mostly unheralded Flinders society whose mission is to provide students with a large dollop of freebies on a weekly basis. I recently sat down on a bright and sunny afternoon in a laneway close, close at hand with Joel Z. Marks, to get the low down on the low key Flinders Cinephile Society, FLICS. FLICS’s principal activity and raison d’etre is screening movies on a weekly basis in an on-campus theatre for FREE. That’s right my fellow impoverished, bargain-scenting students, for FREE. What’s the catch you ask? Well there may not be such a thing as a free lunch – though FUSA, bless, do their best – but thanks to Joel and the hard-working Brodie Clarke there are FREE movies on campus every week. Your part of the bargain is simple – just turn up.

The screenings start at 5pm every Wednesday of the semester and are held in North Theatre 2. Brodie and Joel endeavour to provide a diverse, genre jumping, range of flicks. Check out the FLICS Facebook page for the schedule – handy hint: if you like their page you get weekly posts about the next screening.

FLICS president Joel says, ‘We screen movies, to provide students with a regular fun and enjoyable activity. We are determined to keep this a FREE activity to ensure the films are accessible to everyone. We use the theatre so the movies can be enjoyed in the set-up they were made for—the big screen. We show a wide range of films so people can appreciate different genres and styles.’

It is very apparent that Joel is a cine-tragic and self-confessed massive horror fan. ‘Movies capture periods of time and give us insights into prevailing societal views. For example, the horror films of the 1950s riffed on the prevailing Cold War who-can-you-trust

[FLICS] paranoia (Invasion of the Body Snatchers, The Thing). Through movies we get to explore broody and deep issues.’

Joel joined FLICs when he started at Flinders in 2014. ‘I was fresh out of High School and they said come and watch FREE movies, he recalls, ‘the chance to meet up in the bar then watch a movie sure was a better option than sitting at home. I even had a lecture at that time in my first semester but I soon figured out I could catch that up online. The offer of FREE movies every week was a deal I could not refuse’, he laughs.

When asked for his favourite FLICS memory, Joel replies ‘The Room.

First time I saw it on the big screen. I mean, I’d seen clips of it, all the famous bits, but watching it from start to finish, it was funny and just so absurd and weird. How did they make this movie so terrible yet somewhat entertaining?’

And why would Joel recommend FLICS to new students? ‘It’s FREE, there’s no commitment and we try to appeal to a broad audience.

Also, unlike cinema societies at some other unis, we don’t charge.

We had a fair bit of interest from new students during O’Week which was encouraging but we would really appreciate more bums on seats’.

Speaking of a broad audience, how does FLICS determine its screening schedule? Joel replies, ‘Brodie and I sat down at the start of the year and cranked through a bunch of movies. I was adamant that Rocky be included because it’s an Olympic year and it’s an iconic sports movie. From there, we tried to cover a wide range of genres and tried to plan where they would fit. We tried to sprinkle lighter movies between the heavier ones. For example, after the mid semester break, we are screening Predator followed the next week by The Little Mermaid.’

For the full FLICS experience, tradition dictates meeting in the

FOUNDED Mid-to-late-2000s Tavern before the screening at 4.30 for a pre movie warm-up with a tipple and a chat. From there, it’s a short stroll across the plaza to North Theatre 2 for the FREE screening at 5pm. Being mindful of the hurley-burley that is student life, Joel and Brodie cater for latecomers and don’t set the ‘projector rolling’ until around 5.20.

Moving away from the specific FLICS screenings, Joel is very keen for the club to become more involved in co-hosting events. Last September FLICs co-hosted an event with the Japanese Speaking Club which was really successful. ‘We are keen to cultivate more of these relationships. So if any other clubs are interested, they can contact me via Facebook’, he says. In particular Joel would love to combine Halloween with a horror movie screening. So, Head Honchos of other clubs—who’s game to take that challenge on?

And what classic movie-maker would be a good fit for FLICS? ‘Ed Wood’, Joel replies, ‘he tried so hard even when things were stacked against him. Hell, he even went ahead with Plan 9 from Outer Space even after Bela Lugosi died. He just enjoyed movies and that’s what FLICs is all about.’

So, dear readers. The next time you find yourself short of cash and options on a Wednesday evening, remember that FLICS will be screening a movie just a stone’s throw away from the Hub. And if you’re not broke, meet up with these FLICers in the Tav at 4.30 and buy Joel and Brodie a FREE drink. Don’t you think they’ve earned it?

CONTACT FACEBOOK: /groups/flindersfacts/

PRESIDENT Joel z. marks

membership around 350 facebook members

ACTIVITIES Weekly free film screenings - check facebook for screening schedule!

AUTHOR Richard Falkner, 52—not out, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Creative Writing)

If Richard could live in any fictional world, it would be in the library of Unseen University, Ankh Morpork, Discworld to literally hang around with the librarian, Ook.

3737 37

- Fiction -

Complete the crossword and send a picture of your answers to empire.times@flinders.edu.au and WIN one of ten free double passes to Palace Nova!

ACROSS 5. Lonely computer operator (and future Blofeld) tries to work out if it all means something. (3 words) 9. Russell Crowe stars in political thriller based on original British miniseries. (3 words) 10. Nicholas Cage overacts and Laura Palmer is a fairy. (3 words) 12. The second film in the long-running multi-media series. Ash and friends fight to prevent the end of the world. (4 words) 15. Jurassic Park writer’s story of married stormchasers. (1 word) 18. Liam Neeson / Seth MacFarlane showdown. (8 words) 20. Boy receives mixed news. His parents didn’t die in a car crash.

They were murdered by the leader of a racist death cult. (6 words) 21. Left-wing documentary-maker goes on international cultureplundering spree. (4 words) 22. London teens (including a stormtrooper) fight an alien invasion. ( 3 words)

Crossword clues by Liam McNally

DOWN 1. International powers vie for control of an encryption device.

Margaret Thatcher flirts with a parrot. (4 words) 2. High-school reporter uncovers plot at school. Bruce Willis is an odd principal. (6 words) 3. Enemies bond over their respective mothers’ shared name. (6 words) 4. Man fakes madness to avoid battle. (2 words) 6. Eponymous civil war soldier is transported to another planet.

(2 words) 7. Judged one of the worst films of all time, this is a film paid for by the organisation it is about. (2 words) 8. This is the second film in which Sean Connery travels on this iconic train and someone dies. (5 words) 11. A sequel to Snow White. Without Snow White. (4 words) 13. David Lynch directs a bizarrely non-bizarre story about a man travelling between states on a tractor. (3 words) 14. Calm countryside life is interrupted by volcano and a James Bond takes some downtime to investigate. (2 words) 16. Because it’s always been a great success, someone decides to bring back dinosaurs. Only this time they’re genetically modified. (2 words) 19. Robert Downey Jr. obsessively hunts down one of America’s most notorious serial killers. (1 word)

Colouring Page

Uni stressing you out? Unleash your creativity and unwind...

Artwork: Aden Beaver

39 39

- Reviews -

Rating

Rating

a a a a

a a a a a

Kenneth Cook, in my opinion, is one of the most underrated writers in Australian literature. Throughout his short life, (dying at 57), Cook had written books like The Killer Koala (1986), and a novelisation of Eliza Fraser (1976). His most well-known work (and one of my personal favourites) is the 1961 novel Wake in Fright, which was later adapted into a critically acclaimed film in 1971. My love for Wake in Fright is how I discovered Fear is the Rider, Cook’s last novel.

Released earlier this year, Fear is the Rider is a novel that was recently found among some of Cook’s papers. The story follows John Shaw, a man travelling between Sydney and Adelaide for a job interview. After deciding to take a detour in the outback, Shaw comes across a girl, Katie, stumbling through the bush. Katie’s Land Cruiser has been stolen, and she’s being perused by a desertdwelling creature. In fear, Shaw turns onto a dangerous track that his Honda hatchback is not built for, all to evade this mysterious creature, who is behind the wheel of Katie’s Land Cruiser.

All I can say about Fear is the Rider is ‘Wow!’ Cook’s writing made me want to just keep on turning the pages to see if the characters would make it out alive or not. It is brutal at times, and is described by author Chris Flynn as “pure horror adrenaline”. I can certainly agree with Flynn here; the novel, in my opinion, is a V-8 that keeps roaring until the very end. This novel has the Ozploitation glory of Mad Max, and the outback horror adrenaline from Wolf Creek.

There’s little in the way of character development in this story. For me, the characters of Shaw and Katie didn’t feel fleshed out enough and I had no real connection with either of them. The secondary characters for me were paper cut-outs who were only included for the novel’s brutal scenes. This may disappoint readers who like good character development, but in an incredibly fast-paced novel like this one it’s not really needed. In fact, I would’ve criticised this story a lot more if it kept slowing down to give backstory on the characters.

Overall, Fear is the Rider, is one thrilling and entertaining novel. It’s not as great as Wake in Fright, and lacks true character development, but is certainly one of Cook’s most entertaining novels. I really enjoyed reading it, and I’m certain anyone else who’s interested in fast-paced stories will be as well. You can find this book easily at Dymocks or Booktopia.

AUTHOR Cameron Lowe, 22, Bachelor of Communication and Professional Writing If Cameron could live in a fictional universe, it would be the Doctor Who universe so that he could travel to many different worlds.

John Wick is a fantastic action flick starring Keanu Reeves, Willem Defoe, Michael Nyqvist, and Alfie Allen and is directed by Chad Stahelski and David Leitch. The story of John Wick follows the titular character, John, played by Reeves, who is a former Russian Mafia hit man who has since retired to settle down with the love of his life. Unfortunately her death begins a chain of events which leads to him seeking retribution against his former employer (Michael Nyqvist) and his son (Alfie Allen) after the son kills John’s dog and steals his car. Some people may see this as a silly motive for the actions of the protagonist, however, I feel that the quick succession of these three traumatic incidents make it more understandable why he goes on this rampage.

John Wick, unlike many action movies which have been released in the past 6 to 7 years, has amazing fight choreography and action sequences. Each shot in these action sequences is given adequate time for the audience to comprehend these very impressive set pieces, in contrast with many action films that make unnecessary cuts during action scenes. What I found to be the best part about this movie, is the fact that Keanu Reeves, at the age of 50, did his own stunts, many of which are much more impressive than the majority of the explosion happy, CGI-fests that are usually associated with the genre.

The violence in John Wick is quite intense and brutal but does not feel gratuitous or needlessly excessive as the results are not lingered upon. Usually in movies like this, world-building would take a backseat to the action, but there are some very interesting ideas that appear throughout the film. The prime example of this being the hotel, which acts as a safe house for assassins, and the use of gold coins as a form of payment for different services such as body disposal. Tidbits like that add a new dimension to the film, which elevates it from just a stock standard revenge film into something that could potentially spawn a franchise.

Keanu Reeves’ performance throughout the movie can only be described as a quiet intensity that does not need much dialogue to convey. Most of the time other characters speak of John as this phenomenon who is feared by everyone in the underworld, and who should not be set off in fear of retribution. Michael Nyqvist’s villain is one of the more interesting characters; he is a ruthless mob boss who fears what John is capable of, all the while attempting to protect his son.

The dialogue is very tight with a lot of small moments providing a little bit of humour amongst some of the more intense scenes.

However, one such criticism I have for this film is how they set up the sequel with the ending feeling quite forced, although I loved this movie so much I am willing to forgive it. Overall, John Wick is a fantastic movie with creative set pieces, strong performances and it is possibly one of the best looking action movies in a while, I would highly recommend it.

AUTHOR Joel Marks, 20, Bachelor of Justice and Society (Criminology) 37

If Joel could live in any fictional universe, it would be the Power Rangers universe.

Teenagers and young adults in spandex and giant robots fighting monsters would be

Readers’ Di-Jess(t) First Person Shooter is the debut novel of Adelaide-based short story writer and playwright Cameron Raynes. The novel explores the consequences of love, violence, and adolescence against an unforgiving Australian landscape; short and unexpectedly sweet, it has reminded me of the relevance and emotional power of young adult fiction.

Meet Jayden: fifteen years old, obsessive player of online shooting games, in love with his best friend, Shannon, and anxious owner of a psychosomatic stutter. First Person Shooter follows Jayden through eleven days of his life – a life riddled with several thick and unpredictable threads of tension. Shannon’s mother, who was imprisoned for shooting her abusive husband, will be released in just a few days, but her coldblooded ex-stepson, Pete, is back to avenge his father. At the same time, Jayden also fears for his dog, Charlie, and his neighbour, Nigel, both of whom have only a short time left to live. And if this wasn’t enough to turn your typical teenager into a five-star resort for panic attacks, Jayden must also give a class presentation at the end of the week – a presentation which, due to his stutter, he awaits with terror and shame. These threads twist together perfectly, with the tension rising and falling just enough to let the reader breathe.

The theme of gun violence, as Raynes’ title suggests, delivers prominent thrust within the narrative and gives life to a twohundred-and-fifty page exploration of mortality. I was initially dubious of the sheer plethora of guns and weapon-related images squished into each page. These images serve to foreshadow the novel’s climax, and I began to worry that it would make for a predictable plot. As an occasional-to-frequent reader of young adult fiction, I have encountered a myriad of novels that differ in the names of their characters, but not much else. The stereotypes of young adult fiction do raise their heads in First Person Shooter – the broken family, for example, as well as the beloved girl-nextdoor archetype– and, in much the same way that Jayden fears his class presentation, I feared an ending that I had read before.

Furthermore, the novel’s rural Australian setting is something

37

I always struggle to enjoy; having grown up in the country and disliked it, encountering this landscape in fiction often fails to pull me in. This has sadly ruined many a good novel, and I fervently hoped that my personal aversion would not spoil my enjoyment of this book.

Thankfully, Raynes has proven me wrong on both counts. First Person Shooter comes to a close through events both natural and surprising; likewise, the rural setting engaged my interest in a way few other novels have achieved, and allowed me to more closely empathise with the characters. I experienced the young adult fiction structure and familiar setting somehow entirely anew. My resulting love for this novel, I have realised, is due almost entirely to Raynes’ exquisite characterisation of Jayden. There is such a poignant sadness in the distinction between Jayden the narrator – emotionally open and highly eloquent – and Jayden the teenager, desperate to connect but trapped by his stutter. Through this narrative window, Jayden became so real to me that any concerns about artificially constructed plots or landscapes simply no longer felt important.

For his first novel, Raynes has crafted a true gem that delivers multiple truths about what it is to be both young and disconnected.

Jayden’s character will stay with me for a very long time – and that, more than anything else, elevates First Person Shooter to a standard of young adult fiction all its own.

aaaaa AUTHOR Jess Miller, 22, PhD (English and Creative Writing)

Jess would live at Venture Industries, but only during Dean’s Oxbridge scholar phase, and only if she could be sixteen at the time.

41

- Television Showcase -

10 shows that changed television #4

Monty Python’s Flying Circus ‘And now for something completely different!’

Technically speaking, they weren’t the first. There had been other experimental, British comedy shows in the late 1960s. However, Monty Python’s Flying Circus was the first collaboration between two great writing partnerships –John Cleese and Graham Chapman from The 1948 Show, and Michael Palin and Terry Jones from Do Not Adjust Your Set. These four writer-performers were joined by two other members of the Do Not Adjust crew, musician-comedian Eric Idle, and animator Terry Gilliam. Their collaboration resulted in a fusion of all that was edgy, anarchic and funny emanating from the Cambridge (Cleese, Chapman and Idle) and Oxford (Palin and Jones) Footlights tradition. Most importantly, it was the first of these shows to gain broad appeal, not only in the UK but throughout parts of the Commonwealth, pockets of Europe and most importantly, the USA. What the Beatles did for popular music, Monty Python did for Brit comedy – they captivated America.

The group were determined to push the boundaries of comedy, taste and decency. They took on most of the sacred cows of British society—the class system, civil servants, the military, police, judges and lawyers, the church, the monarchy, and the politicians.

Prime Minister Edward Heath, his Minister for Education Margaret Thatcher, and US President Richard Nixon were particular targets.

Their approach was evident from the very beginning of their first show when it went to air in 1969. A figure is seen far off in the distance who gradually comes toward the camera. When the figure is in full view, it is revealed to be a dishevelled, mildly distressed Michael Palin clad in a raggedy suit. He looks at the

camera and says: ‘It’s’. The opening credits roll to the rousing strains of Sousa’s Liberty Bell. What follows is a half hour sketch comedy show which was best summed up by the Pythons’ eventual catch phrase, ‘And now for something completely different.’

And what was so different? The Pythons played on absurdity blended with surrealism, satire, a touch of mindless violence and loads of discomfort. They did not rely on punchlines to complete a sketch—unheard of at the time in British comedy which had a tried and proved sketch comedy formula stretching back to the 19th Century Music Halls. They often blended one sketch into another. They mixed historical figures into contemporary situations—‘no one escapes the Spanish Inquisition!’ Frequently, sketches would be introduced, interrupted or ended by Terry Gilliam’s surreal cut-out animation. For instance, The Piranha Brothers, a sketch parodying the real life London gangsters, the Cray Brothers, ended with the nemesis of brother Dinsdale—an animated giant Hedgehog named Spiny Norman—looming over a street of row cottages and calling his name.

As a sketch comedy show, The Flying Circus was an uneven affair. At the time, all of the sketches poked and prodded at British society.

Some of these were not as relevant to people outside of the UK. Viewing them today, many of the sketches lack relevance, and are highly inappropriate given current societal norms re: gender, race, and sexuality. Particularly in the third and the shortened fourth

- Television Showcase -

and final season, the quality of the writing starts to dive. However, many sketches became and remain classics. There’s the cheese shop, self defence against fresh fruit, the dead parrot, the ministry of silly walks, spam (with viking chorus), the lumberjack song, and election night special.

Many of the characters in the sketches were given absurd or silly names: Mr Arthur Pewtey, the dullest man in Britain; Mrs Premise and Mrs Conclusion; Mr Eric Praline; Ken Shabby; Mr Badger; The Reverend Arthur Belling, Vicar of St-Loony-Up-the-Cream-Bunand-Jam; Raymond Luxury-Yacht; and the Silly Party candidate for Luton,Tarquin Fin-tim-lin-bin-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-F’tang-F’tangOlé-Biscuitbarrel.

After four seasons, The Flying Circus stopped. The Pythons moved on as a troupe to make their three best known movies; Monty Python and the Holy Grail, The Life of Brian, and The Meaning of Life. Their individual efforts ranged from wonderful to lacklustre. In horse racing parlance, John Cleese’s Fawlty Towers and Michael Palin’s Ripping Yarns and their later collaboration, the movie, A Fish Called Wanda, are way out in front. Terry Gilliam’s Brazil is out on a quirky limb in the middle of the field with Jabberwocky a bit further back.

The misfiring pirate spoof Yellowbeard and Terry Jones’ recent utter turkey Absolutely Anything bring up the rear.

‘This parrot wouldn’t “boom” if I put 4000 volts through it. It’s bleeding demised!’

‘It’s not pining, it’s passed on. This parrot is no more.’

- The Parrot Sketch.

In addition to their creative output, the Python’s legacy can be seen in the next generation of British comedians (including Rowan Atkinson, Pamela Stephenson, Griff Rhys-Jones, Mel Smith, Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders, Rik Mayall, and Adrian Edmonson) and writers (including Ben Elton, Richard Curtis, Rob Grant, and Doug Naylor) who followed the surrealist/absurdist trail they blazed with TV shows such as Not the Nine O’clock News, The Comic Strip Presents, The Young Ones, French and Saunders, Blackadder, and Red Dwarf.

And then there’s the impact they had on the generation of school kids—my generation—who were born at the right time to absorb Pythonesque humour and recite sketches chapter and verse ad nauseum from 1970s school yards until this very day, much to the chagrin of our children. In fact, one of my erstwhile friends was so influenced by all things Python that he changed his name by deed poll to Tarquin Fin-tim-lin-bin-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-F’tangF’tang-Olé-Biscuitbarrel.

AUTHOR Richard Falkner, 52—not out, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Creative Writing)

If Richard could live in any fictional world, it would be in the library of Unseen University, Ankh Morpork, Discworld to literally hang around with the librarian Ook.

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- Television Showcase -

AT HER MAJESTY’s theatre Having never been to a live musical, or having ever seen the film, seeing Little Shop of Horrors on stage left me awestruck.

I am still impressed with the talent and by no means, having seen the show, could I say it wasn’t worth the money. It was one of the most impressive performances I’ve ever seen, not to mention its great storyline—and my favourite kind of ending!

Director, Dean Bryant, choreographer, Andrew Hallsworth, and musical director, Andrew Worboys, revived the cult-classic making it appear fresh and original in the recent incarnation. The set was cleverly designed and Earth Visual & Physical Inc. put together a series of puppet Audrey II’s which were both aesthetically pleasing and terrifyingly brilliant.

The incredible skill of the actors was entrancing from the moment the show began. Tyler Coppin as Mr Mushnick portrayed his character’s duplicitous nature well, never slipping from his selfserving aims. The three girls, Chloe Zuel, Josie Lane, and Angelique Cassimatis had the audience in raptures of delight as they narrated and played their part in convincing Seymour (Brent Hill) to continue on his path to fame and fortune.

Hill worked well as a reluctant hero and Esther Hannaford was beguiling as a desperate woman trying to cope with a number of abusive relationships. I feel that Orin (Scott Johnson), the terrifying and sadistic dentist, could not have been cast better.

Seymour, a meek botanical genius discovers a new species of plant: the Audrey II; a strange and exotic little thing that flourishes under Seymour’s care, drawing in much needed customers to Mushnick’s failing

flower shop. But things go drastically wrong when the Audrey II’s desire for blood gets out of hand and poor Seymour is convinced to sate it. With limited options the Audrey II shows Seymour how he can solve two problems at once, getting rid of Audrey’s abusive boyfriend, Orin, and satisfying the Audrey II’s demands. Like with the first taste of blood, the Audrey II’s hunger only grows. The plant promises to grant Seymour’s monetary wishes if only he keeps feeding him. Having been poor all his life Seymour doesn’t take much convincing as he desperately wants to impress Audrey. It can only end badly.

stage was brilliant and worked well to set the tone of each act.

Divided into two acts with a short interval, the performance differentiates between pre and post success by the clever use of colour. The first act is entirely monochromatic, while the second is bright and full of colour. This use of colour on

A classic sci-fi storyline where the world is overtaken, it is definitely worth watching.

Two film versions were made, one in 1960 and another in 1986. The 1960 version is available to watch on Youtube in full, and the complete soundtrack to the 1986

There were so many amazing songs in this performance, coming together with upbeat, music which drove the performance. One of my favourite songs from the musical is ‘The Dentist’, which, those who don’t like dentists, will surely love. When I was younger I had a dentist who enjoyed causing pain and I doubt I’m the only one.

‘The Dentist’ is the story of a sadistic little boy finding a profession he loves and learning to inflict pain through dentistry rather than on guppies and puppies.

version can also be found there.

AUTHOR Kayla Gaskell, 21, Creative Arts (Creative Writing)

If Kayla could live in any fictional universe, it would be Alagaesia.

- Review -

Labyrinth of Lies REVIEW Labyrinth of Lies; the title itself is evocative of the dark and dangerous subject matter encountered in this film. Set in Germany more than 10 years after WWII, it seems the German people as a collective have no knowledge or recollection of the horrific crimes committed by their fathers and mothers, uncles and aunts, or anyone else for that matter. Labyrinth of Lies is based on a true court trial over war crimes committed by Germans in WWII, but focuses on the emotional journey of an idealistic fictional lawyer: Johann Radmann (Alexander Fehling). Radmann and his small team, together, force Germany to face its past.

It is 1958, in Frankfurt, Germany. There are children laughing and playing in a German schoolyard. A group of teachers talk as Simon Kirsch (Johannes Krisch) walks past the school fence nearby. One teacher walks over to aid Kirsch, as it appears he cannot find a light for his cigarette. Kirsch drops his belongings in a stark realisation of where he has previously seen this teacher; he is a former SS member who served at Auschwitz where Kirsch was once a prisoner. Kirsch and Thomas Gnielka (Andre Szymanski), a determined journalist, barge into the public prosecutor’s office

where Radmann works and dare someone to take on the case of bringing this ex-Nazi teacher to justice. Radmann does not accept the case immediately but agrees just hours after, in order to prove himself as a capable lawyer and not just some traffic ticket prosecutor.

Labyrinth of Lies does not focus on a single case, but exposes similar cases of Nazi officers at Auschwitz. These trials take place between 1963 and 1965. These trails are particularly significant because they took place under German law, compared to the few previous trials that took place right after the war under international law. It was the first time a losing nation tried its own citizens for war crimes.

This film is unique in terms of the angle in which WWII is portrayed. There have been countless films, documentaries and books released on WWII, but have told of what happened in post-war Germany, how did people react emotionally and lawfully?

Labyrinth of Lies is a film, not a documentary, and so to be less of a history lesson and more of a personal emotional response, the film follows Radman and his reaction to learning of the sometimes cruel roles the people close to him played in WWII.

There are times when Labyrinth of Lies feels disjointed and confusing. I do not feel it completely works as a fictional drama.

I was more interested in the history-side of the narrative as I was unaware of the German people’s lack of knowledge of the part they played in WWII and particularly of the Auschwitz concentration camp.

We live in a completely different world of knowledge today compared to this film’s place in time. A few personal stories are told by characters as eyewitness accounts of murders that took place in Auschwitz.

Radmann and his team collect these eyewitness accounts in the hope of successfully prosecuting the ex-Nazi teacher and the many other Auschwitz leaders. These personal accounts of life in Auschwitz are of course disturbing, and they help to remind the viewer to never forget the atrocities that took place.

Labyrinth of Lies was made in 2014 in Germany, but was not released until the 31st of March this year in Australia.

AUTHOR Rhianna Carr, 21, Bachelor of Media Arts

Rhianna says she would live in the land of Ooo from Adventure Time if she could live in any fictional universe.

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- Gaming -

Level UP It’s every munchkin for themself...

Up until recently, all I had heard about Munchkin was rumour; that it was simultaneously the worst and the best game ever, that you would lose all your friends when playing it (a feat I had hitherto only imagined was achievable by Monopoly), that it was hilarious, ridiculous, and somehow related to Dungeons and Dragons. One fine afternoon, about 15 years after the game was first released, I discovered that all these rumours are true.

Munchkin is a card game, revolving around the basic premise of exploring a dungeon. During your turn, you kick down a door, fight a monster, and grab some treasure, with the eventual goal to reach level 10 and win. Everyone starts as a level 1 human with no class, and a set of cards that may contain a race, class, and items, which can be applied to your character. Your turn starts when you kick down a door, flipping a card from the ‘Door’ deck which may reveal a monster that you have to fight, or may not, in which case you can look for trouble by playing a monster from your own hand to defeat, or loot the room, flipping a card from the ‘Treasure’ deck to gain items. The game is equalised somewhat with the charity system, where you may only hold 5 cards at a time, any excess must be played or donated to the lowest level player.

There are multiple races and classes ranging from human to elf, and warrior to wizard, and items can have a range of special abilities that may be race, class, or even gender specific. Your level is a key component of the game, and it can be increased by random cards or killing monsters, but can also be decreased by some cards. A level can also be bought by discarding items worth a total of at least 1,000 gold pieces, however to reach level 10 you have to defeat a monster in combat, and that is where I found the backstabbing most often occurs.

Monsters have a range of different combat strengths, shown on their cards, and to fight them you must compare your own combat strength to theirs. Your combat strength is your level with added modifiers from any items or other cards that you have in play. If your combat strength is equal or lesser than the monster’s, you must run away. However, if your combat strength is greater than the monster’s, you win and gain one or more levels.

Other factors can influence the outcome of your combat though; players have the option of helping you out (with a bribe), giving

the monster enhancements to make your fight harder, or even sending wandering monsters in to join the monster you are already fighting, so that you have to beat their combined combat strengths. These latter strategies are most commonly employed against the highest level character, because no one really wants anyone else to win. Upon failing a combat, you must roll a sixsided die to successfully run away, with the penalties for failing to run away ranging from losing an item to death. Upon death, the other characters get to loot your corpse and take all of your cards; so it really is just like Dungeons and Dragons.

Munchkin was released in 2001, created by Steve Jackson Games, with Steve Jackson as the writer, and illustrations by John Kovalic.

It is designed for 3-6 players (ages 10+) and can take up to two hours to play, depending on how successful everyone is at backstabbing each other. There have been numerous expansion packs released to add more cards to the deck, and alternate versions of the game; including Super Munchkin, Munchkin Impossible, Munchkin Pathfinder, Munchkin Adventure Time and many more, tying in to popular culture. Deluxe versions of the game have also been released, containing a board and tokens so that players can more easily track their levels, which is very handy to use. A tie-in level-tracker app is available for iOS and Android, which gives some in-game benefits along with helping players track their level.

I had a lot of fun playing Munchkin, however as with most games you need the right group of people. It’s not very fun when everyone instantly gangs up on the one player who has a reputation for winning, but then it is great to make some very strategic moves to stop two players who are both about to reach level 10. I would recommend it to anyone who likes light-hearted strategy games with lots of pop culture references and has a couple of hours to spare. I look forward to playing it again myself, and maybe even winning for once.

AUTHOR Kelly Guthberlet, 21, Bachelor of Education (Middle and Secondary)/Bachelor of Science

Kelly would live in the Star Wars universe and become the most badass Jedi Knight there ever was.

- Music Review - - Music Review

The Music Column

Music - Kanye West, Olafur Arnalds & Nils Frahm, Pet Shop Boys.

AAeee

My Kanye West review last issue may have been harsh, but that’s only because I was angry he didn’t release the album on Spotify. Now that it is readily available, I can confirm that it’s still overhyped trash. While West makes many statements on The Life of Pablo, he really cements the fact that he is a better producer than he is a rapper. Sample ranges are rich and varied, the combinations of different samples on “No More Parties in L.A.” are messy but work in conjunction with Kendrick Lamar’s song-saving verse on the rich Californian lifestyle. A few tracks like “Famous” have 808 drum beats that make you want to shake your a$$ and holler at the sky, but these moments are few and far between. The album contains less autotune but more half-thought out and absurd lyrics, (‘Sometimes I wish that my dick had GoPro’) and choices of using the words ‘Bitch’ and ‘Nigger’ seem more like lazy songwriting rather than unadulterated genius. Kanye is no God and The Life of Pablo is certainly no masterpiece.

Trance Frendz was released earlier in the year, and to little surprise the album does not contain trance beats. Nils Frahm’s spacious piano melodies team up with Olafur Arnalds’ electronic sounds and together they’ve produced quality. The duo recorded and improvised over an entire night, selecting a few pieces from what they’d made. The duo’s skills blend perfectly together, especially on ‘23:17’, where Frahm combines his soft piano with Arnald’s emotive electronics. They continue the synth soundscapes on the next track, ‘23:52’ which gets too intense for its own good and upsets the quietness the initial tracks earlier setup. The pair spend the next 15 minutes never venturing closer to that hard crescendo, and bring the album to a close softly, the way it started. The record rises and falls, albeit a great soundtrack for a quiet night in.

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From their seemingly endless collection of discography, The Pet Shop Boys have returned with Super. They’re one of the rare bands that never seem to change as the years pass, yet their work always sounds fresh. On the album Neil Tennant sings about sad robots, dictators with their hands tied, and being groovy in London’s west end, while Chris Lowe provides the disco/electronic infused beats. The songsters move from one upbeat high to the next with ease, and the album rarely stops providing the goods. A few tracks drop the bar, ‘Twenty-Something’s’, ‘Sad Robot World’, and ‘Into Thin Air’ are the slower, more relaxed tracks that just don’t work next to tracks like ‘Inner Sanctum’, ‘Burn’, and ‘The Pop Kids’ which are begging to be played at your next dance party.

AUTHOR Aden Beaver, 19, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Digital Media) If Aden could live in any fictional universe, he would probably choose The Thunderbirds (the best show!)

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ANIME REVIEW:

Free! Eternal Summer

The highly anticipated swimming anime is back in action for a second season, filled with bittersweat drama, top naked high school boys and—not all that much swimming.

First released in 2014, Free! Eternal Summer is at last available for Australian sports-anime fans. Arriving one year after the first season, simply titled Free!, we continue right where we left off. Eternal Summer is an equally charming drama, readily welcomed by anyone patient enough to actually complete the first season.

Easily keeping up its focus on character development, interpersonal conflicts and their relation to working together on team relays, it’s actually pretty good. Give it a chance and you’ll be cheering them on harder than real Olympians. Animated by the iconic Kyoto Animation, it doesn’t disappoint visually; sporting a beautiful 14 episodes we discover the swim club’s story was far from over.

It’s a tough time being in the last year of high school for Haruka Nanase. He can no longer paddle through life whimsically and he is under pressure to decide his future. Clearly a swimming prodigy, those around him at the Iwatobi swim club can envision a successful competitive career, however Haruka just wants to swim freely. Meanwhile, childhood rival and reformed sharkman Rin Matsuoka takes charge of Samezuka’s swim team, impressing on his fellow club members the importance of not just skill in swimming, but passion.

Following high expectations from the first season, the animation is of course flawless, fluid and festive.

It completely encapsulates the beaming and pure personalities of the swim club boys. It is in fact so effervescent, that the more you watch, the lighter you may

feel as it lifts the heavy negative energy you have built up dealing with the real world. You can really tell that Kyoto Animation knows what it’s doing, having no trouble dishing out multiple outfit changes, their signature bubbly character movement when the frame rate is just right, and perfect tears for emotional scenes.

I’d have to say the wow factor of this anime is how it combines drama and sport genres in such a compelling way.

It’s not just a 100-metre dash with unnecessary emotions, nor a high school slice of life with swimming tacked on to make it unique. Eternal Summer manages to take the best parts of each genre in its colourful fusion; between intense swimming carnivals and heartfelt fallouts, the balance is peaceful yet gripping.

Definitely not one to be missed if you’ve seen Free! or enjoy other sports anime. Free! Eternal Summer is a really solid show, progressing consistently; it delivers a subtle, understated piece. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, provides you with a few laughs and then leaves something special.

3.5/5 Shinji-kuns

AUTHOR Emma Hough Hobbs, 18, Bachelor of Creative Arts (Digital Media) Emma says if she could live in any fictional universe, it would have to be the Pokemon universe.

By Emma Hough Hobbs

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Creative Competition: Photography First Place: Sarah Gates