Funeral Times Magazine issue 1 2020

The magazine for Funeral Directors in Ireland

2020 Vol. 20 No.1

Non-religious funerals in Northern Ireland Meaningful and bespoke funerals Humanist funerals are non-religious ceremonies that focus on the person ö©Ë © Þ ¬ ɇ æ© ½¬£ æ© ü ½ ɇ Ä the relationships they forged. They are based on the humanist perspective that every life is valuable and unique.

Each ceremony is suited to the person ö©Ë © Þ ¬ Ä æ© £ ½¬Ä¤Þ Ë£ æ© × Ë×½ ö©Ë ½Ëõ æ© ÃɌ s Ä © ½× Ú Ã Ã Ú æ© × ÚÞËÄ ö©Ë © Þ ö¬æ© Ä ê× æ ½ Ú æ¬ËÄ Ë£ ½¬£ ɇ ö©¬½Þæ others may take a more solemn tone.

A humanist funeral is the perfect option £ËÚ £ 콬 Þ Ä £Ú¬ Ä Þ ö©Ë ö Äæ Þ¬Ä Ú ɇ × ÚÞËÄ ½ Ú ĉ æ¬ËÄ ËÄ æ© ½¬£ Ë£ æ© ¬Ú ½Ëõ ËÄ Þ ɫ ö¬æ©Ëêæ Ú ½¬¤¬ËÄɌ c©¬Þ can be especially important if the person ö©Ë ¬ ö Þ ÄËæ Ú ½¬¤¬ËêÞɌ

A funeral can include time for silent Ú ĉ æ¬ËÄ ËÄ æ© ½¬£ Ë£ æ© Þ Ɍ This time is inclusive of people from all º¤ÚËêÄ Þ Ä × Ë×½ ö¬æ© Ú ½¬¤¬ËêÞ beliefs can take this opportunity to say Þ¬½ Äæ ×Ú ü Úɇ ¬£ æ© ü ö¬Þ©Ɍ

Find your local celebrant Our funeral ceremonies are conducted by humanist celebrants. Contact your ½ Ú Äæ æË ü æË ĈÄ Ëêæ ÃËÚ Ëêæ Þ ü¬Ä¤ ¬¤Ä¬Ĉ Ä × ÚÞËÄ ½ £ Ú ö ½½Ɍ BALLYCASTLE John Foley 07949 114455

BELFAST Richard Lavery 07802 839543

BELFAST MaryLou McShane 07962 906236

NEWTOWNABBEY ]æ ö Úæ +˽ Ä 07971 634098

BALLYMENA Lisa Wilkinson 07759 514139

BELFAST Maire De Buitlear 07841 860276

DERRY Julie Hassell 07510 851612

NORTH DOWN Trevor Molloy 07549 946622

BANBRIDGE Joan Davis 07546 954222

BELFAST Cathy Graham 07595 927494

DUNMURRY Janni Knox 07890 861690

HUMANISTS UK info@humanists.uk 020 7324 3060

BANGOR Michael McAlinden 07305 892201

BELFAST Rachel Smith 07957 474643

LISBURN Sheena Bradley 07732 143183

humanists.uk/ ceremonies

Humanist Ceremonies™ is part of Humanists UK, a registered charity in England and Wales (no. 285987) and company limited by guarantee (no. 228781).

The magazine for Funeral Directors in Ireland

Sam Kershaw p14

Contents

Forget me not p24

Funeral Times Trade Show Ireland 2020....................................................................................4 Breslin Funeral Directors open new Funeral Home............................................................... 7 IAFD News................................................................................................................................................8 Funeral Partners invest in Irish businesses................................................................................14 Humanist Funerals in Northern Ireland.................................................................................... 20 NAFD news.............................................................................................................................................26 New premises for Norman McBriar............................................................................................32 BIE News ................................................................................................................................................34 Declan Stephens takes over Hassan Funeral Service...........................................................41 Dr Bill Webster on 2020 vision.................................................................................................... 46 SAIF News...............................................................................................................................................53 Jennifer Muldowney on why pets are important................................................................56 N.I. Chest Heart & Stroke and the Jam Card...........................................................................62 Padriac Cawley on how it’s not all about him!......................................................................65 Crafting a better viewing by Matt Black.................................................................................. 66 Mattie Lennon on future compost and a Munster exhumation...................................72 Mary Elizabeth Dillon - What do you say?..............................................................................75 Classifieds...............................................................................................................................................79

Breslin’s new premises p7

EDITORIAL AND ADVERTISING CONTACTS: Graham Brown, Ruth McQuillan, Vikki Crangle, Paula Hanna Tel: (028) 3835 5060 (048) from ROI Funeral Times is owned and published by: InHouse Publications, 1 Annagh Drive, Craigavon, Co. Armagh BT63 5WF E: sales@funeraltimes.com

Disclaimer: Readers are urged to support the magazine’s advertisers, but the publishers cannot be held responsible for any claims made or implied in the advertisements. The publishers reserve the right to refuse advertising. Opinions expressed in this magazine by contributing writers and advertisers are not necessarily those of the publishers. Every effort is made to ensure the accuracy of information contributed for inclusion in this magazine but no legal responsibility will be accepted by the publishers for loss arising from the use of published articles. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means without prior consent. Articles and photographs for inclusion are welcomed but the publishers cannot accept responsibility for their loss or damage however caused.

FuneralTimes | 3

NATIONAL SHOW CENTRE Stockhole Lane, Cloghran, Swords, Co. Dublin, Ireland

Dear Funeral Directors,

F

You are cordially invited!

uneral Times is currently well underway in organising its fourth Trade Show, held at the National Show Centre, Swords, Dublin on Tuesday 6th and Wednesday 7th October 2020.

Following on from three hugely successful

4 | FuneralTimes

previous events, Funeral Times have been thrilled with the uptake from exhibitors and visitors alike, with many friends made along the way. The move to the National Show Centre, ideally situated beside Dublin Airport, provides

JOIN US ON TUESDAY 6TH &

additional space in order to cater for growing demand.

Along with a change of venue, Funeral Times Trade Show Ireland 2020 will also be open on Tuesday evening to allow busy funeral directors the opportunity to visit after work.

As with previous shows, our aim is to organise an event that caters for the funeral industry in Ireland, at a time of continuing and accelerating change.

As the industry in Ireland is facing unprecedented regulatory issues both at home and at European level including health & safety, repatriation and coroners removals, it is important that funeral directors and related service providers participate in the discussion and organise themselves to address the issues in the best and most efficient way possible.

Professional bodies such as the IAFD, NAFD, BIE, SAIF, PEAI and BIFD continue to do a magnificent job in guiding the industry and its members through the maze of legislation and regulation as it constantly evolves and is updated. They make representation to the various authorities on behalf of members and inform Funeral Directors through their education and service excellence programmes.

We hope that the Funeral Times Trade Show Ireland 2020 will play its part in these times of

change. Our aim is to make it the showcase for the industry on the island. We want to create the best environment where suppliers and their customers - present and future - meet to do business.

During the show we will be organising guest speakers and seminars - many of an educational nature - which we believe will attract a large and wide audience.

The new venue, National Show Centre, Swords, Dublin is very accessible with many local hotels nearby for exhibitors and visitors.

So put the date in your diary now and we hope to see you at the Show!

WEDNESDAY 7TH OCTOBER 2020

FuneralTimes | 5

New Bundoran premises for Breslin Funeral Directors H

aving served the North West with dedication and devotion for 50 years, Breslins, have opened a beautiful new funeral home in Bundoran, helping them maintain and extend the “Excellence in Funeral Service” they provide

to the community.

Owner Donal Breslin explains how the Bundoran funeral home is now the ‘base for all our services, it is here that we can meet with families in private to organise all funeral arrangements in a homely and relaxing environment. We also have our showroom here which carries a full range of our coffins and caskets as well as all our floral tributes, grave accessories and much more.’

Breslin Funeral Directors champion the values long held in the profession in this country. Care, dignity and professionalism shown, to one and all, with a readiness to go above and beyond at the drop of a hat in order to care for, advise and guide those at their most lost and vulnerable time.

Donal Breslin with his fleet

FuneralTimes | 7

IAFD News New Year welcomes new president The New Year commences with a warm welcome to the new President, Robert Fanagan, who was presented with the chain of office by Edwina Fitzgerald (outgoing President) at the Annual General Meeting held in Hodson Bay Hotel on 16th November 2019

Annual General Meeting - 2019 T he 40th AGM was very successful and well supported by members from all parts of the country.

Prior to the meeting a number of suppliers exhibited their merchandise and services which provided members an opportunity to view and hear about new products and systems in the marketplace.

The meeting followed the normal format which included a full review of the Association’s affairs and reports from the various Committees. A highlight of the meeting was the presentation of Certificates by Edwina Fitzgerald on behalf of Joanne Cooney, Course Co-ordinator to this year’s FDCA Students.

Following the meeting Colm Kieran, Funeral Directors Solutions, gave an excellent and very informative presentation entitled, 2020 Vision for Funeral Director Charges, which was very well received by all present.

The Dinner Dance in the evening commenced with the delivery of a short speech by Edwina Fitzgerald. She thanked all who attended, especially our sponsors following which she

8 | FuneralTimes

presented Orla Nolan with a gift to recognise her work during the year.

Edwina also made a presentation to James Brown on his retirement and Robert Fanagan presented flowers to Mrs Sandra Brown as a token of appreciation.

Edwina Fitzgerald made a presentation to James Brown

IAFD News Non-Board Retirements The following retirements were announced: Joanne Cooney Joanne has stepped down as education programme coordinator for the Funeral Directors Certificate Award. Over the years Joanne has made an immense contribution in the promotion of education within the IAFD, she has been a great source of support and encouragement to all the students and an inspiration to the members of the Education Committee. Joanne is a past president and honorary member of the IAFD and she also

completed the original Certificate of Funeral Practice. We wish her all the best for the future.

James Brown James Brown retired as a consultant to IAFD during the AGM. James has given much time to the Association over almost twenty years.

Without him the Association would not have grown and evolved into the successful organisation it is today. The Board are grateful to him for his guidance, support and friendship over the years.

Retirements from the Board John Foley John retired from the Board at the AGM and we wish him all the best into the future. He was bestowed with Honorary Membership during the AGM which is truly deserved, an immensely dedicated person who helped the IAFD massively during his time on the Board.

Kieran Sholvin Kieran also retired from the Board and the Board would like to thank Kieran for his contribution to the IAFD Board over the last two years and wish him all the John Foley with Edwina Fitzgerald

best in the future.

Education T

he students from the 2018/2019 Education Programme, Funeral Directing Certificate Award, were presented with their certificates at the Annual General Meeting on the 16th November 2019 in the Hodson Bay Hotel, Athlone.

The students were Geraldine Bane, Sarah Carney, Adam Carroll, Henry Kelly, Mary

Keohane, Kate McAleer, Mark McBriar, Jacqueline Murphy, Luke O’Sullivan, Paul Reilly and Ann Thompson. Patrick Canny and William McGuire were also presented with certificates for completing elements of the course

FuneralTimes | 9

IAFD News OTHER NEWS...

Website Development Dublin Diocese Meeting An announcement was made at the AGM that IAFD is in the process of updating its website. The developers are aware of our requirements, including the ‘look and feel.’

The home page will be inviting and easy to use and the “member sign-in” section will add real value. Useful information relating to repatriation, exhumation and preplanning funerals, to name a few, will be readily available together with other information that will be very relevant for IAFD members.

A

number of issues were referred to at the AGM relating to Dublin Diocese payments due to the introduction of a new church offering from 1 January 2020. Robert Fanagan met with Declan McSweeney and Keava Lyons from the Diocese Finance Department, in Clonliffe College on Wednesday December 18th. Other IAFD members were invited and Robert Maguire, Robin Cunningham, Michael O’Donovan and John Foley attended.

The main purpose was to obtain clarity on several issues relating to the new fee. An email has been sent to all IAFD members in Dublin, Meath, Kildare and Wicklow explaining the outcome of the meeting about the offering.

MID-YEAR MEMBERS MEETING Maryborough House Hotel, Cork.

Friday 15th May at 2.30pm (Lunch for Members available at 1.00pm) (Details of format and content to be announced as soon as possible)

REGIONAL TRAINING WORKSHOPS: Horse and Jockey, Tipperary - Thursday February 20th at 2.30pm Killyhevlin, Enniskillen - Thursday 24th Sept at 2.30pm (Topics will be announced in advance)

10 | FuneralTimes

IAFD Contacts Robert Fanagan (President) Fanagans Willbrook Street, Rathfarnham, Dublin 14 Ph: 01 4931000 Email: robert@fanagans.ie

Mary Cunniffe (PRO) Massey Bros Funeral Home Templeogue Village Dublin 6W Mobile: 085 8010742 Ph: 01 4907601 Email: mary.cunniffe@hotmail.com

Donal Forde (First Vice President) Forde & Sons Funeral Home South Gate Bridge Cork Co. Cork Ph: 021 4318222 Email: fordes@indigo.ie

Fintan Cooney (Membership Officer) Fanagans 54 Aungier Street Dublin 2 Ph: 01 4167700 Email: fintanjen@gmail.com

Edwina Fitzgerald (Immediate Past President) Fitzgeralds Funeral Directors Channel Road Rush Co. Dublin Ph: 087 3512949 Email: edwinafitzgerald78@gmail.com Dara Gillespie (Hon. Secretary) Finlays Funeral Service Tierney Street Ardee Co. Louth Mobile: 086 7923472 Email: dara.gillespie@finlaygrp.com Niall Mulligan (Hon. Treasurer) Heffernan’s Funeral Directors Trim Co. Meath Mobile: 086 8208501 Ph: 046 9438662 Email: heffernansfd@gmail.com

Tom Lawless Lawless Funeral Directors Mucklagh, Tullamore Co. Offaly Ph: 057 9322622 Email: info@tullamorefunerals.ie Dermot McCarthy McCarthy’s Funeral Home Gurrane, Banteer, Cork.

Ph: 029 56044 Email: dermot@ mccarthyfuneraldirectors.com Niamh Sweeney John Sweeney and Sons Fairgreen Arklow Co Wicklow Ph: 0402 32333 Email: niamh@johnsweeneyandsons.ie

FuneralTimes | 11

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FuneralTimes | 13

Expansion for Funeral Partners as

Third generation Funeral Director James Brown MBE

E

ighteen respected funeral homes across Northern Ireland have become part of the high-quality Funeral Partners network - which becomes the leading funeral provider in Northern Ireland.

The investment by Funeral Partners sees James Brown & Sons, the name synonymous with arranging family funerals in Belfast since 1904, expanding to South Belfast and Dunmurry.

The acquisition also includes 120-year-old Belfast businesses Houston & Williamson and Bairds of Antrim, which was founded in the late nineteenth century, and other established businesses in Bangor, Belfast, Carrickfergus, L’derry, Donaghadee, Dungannon, Glengormley, Holywood, Larne, Portadown and Newtownards.

Funeral Partners is the UK’s third largest funeral business, with the new businesses bringing their total number of funeral homes to over 200, maintaining the heritage of more than 100 family businesses across England, Scotland and now Northern Ireland.

14 | FuneralTimes

Chief Executive Officer Sam Kershaw said: “As our first funeral acquisition outside the UK mainland, these 18 branches represent significant growth for Funeral Partners.

“These well-established funeral businesses have excellent reputations in their local communities and we look forward to working with the local teams and investing in the businesses to ensure they continue to provide a caring and professional service to local families in Belfast and across Northern Ireland.”

Funeral Partners understands the importance of traditional and cultural differences when providing funeral services in Northern Ireland compared to the mainland.

Third generation Funeral Director James Brown MBE, whose grandfather founded James Brown & Sons, said: “I have been greatly encouraged by Funeral Partners’ willingness to engage with the businesses here in Northern Ireland and to listen to their views.

“I have every confidence that the already excellent service our staff in Northern Ireland

they invest in Northern Ireland provide to bereaved people will be enhanced as a result of the change of ownership.”

Wayne Glenn, Funeral Director of Adair & Neely, L’Derry, who joined his father in the business over 20 years ago welcomes becoming part of the network “like a breath of fresh air” after receiving an investment from Funeral Partners, which included refurbished offices.

He said: “Funeral Partners are dedicated funeral people and their management team understands the importance of traditional family funerals.

“Funeral Partners have encouraged us to be

fully involved with the local community and local people, to support the people who have supported us. We want to be back at the heart of the community supporting youth groups, church groups and other organisations.”

Fourth generation Funeral Director Jon Baird, whose great grandfather James founded Bairds of Antrim, said: “I feel it’s a very positive step because Funeral Partners share our core values, they understand that the families we work with are the foundation of all funeral businesses and they understand the importance of being part of the community.”

Funeral Director James Brown MBE shaking hands with Sam Kershaw Chief Executive Officer, Funeral Partners

Funeral Partners is interested in further expansion in Northern Ireland and would be happy to have an informal and confidential chat with any Funeral Directors who are considering selling their businesses. Contact Chief Executive Officer Sam Kershaw, directly on 07834 531822 or email: sam.kershaw@funeralpartners.co.uk.

FuneralTimes | 15

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Glyn Tallon shares his expertise with Canadians On September 23rd and 24th, 2019 Tallon Mortuary Specialists and the Canadian School of Advanced PREP joined together at Hockley Valley Resort in Mono, Ontario, Canada to present a pre conference educational seminar for the Ontario Funeral Service Association to their members and other Canadian embalmers.

T

his event was attended by over twenty five

spoke on various technical

to view their loved one

subjects ranging from the

for a final time. With over

Canadian embalmers as Glyn

basic care of decedent care

12 hours of continuing

Tallon and Karl Wenzel, Larry

to advanced restorative

education presented at this

Stuart, Micheal Gailbrath,

procedures used to allow

event it marks a significant

and Melissa Machado

families the opportunity

achievement for Tallon

Presenters at Ontario Funeral Service Association Pre-conference Embalmers’ Seminar September 2019 (L-R) Larry Stuart Jr., Karl Wenzel, Melissa Machado, Micheal Galbraith and Glyn Tallon 18 | FuneralTimes

Mortuary Specialists Glyn Tallon and the Canadian School of Advanced PREPS Karl Wenzel. In 2019 these two individuals organised and presented more embalmer education across Canada than any and all other professional associations combined. In March 2019 they also presented a two day seminar in Navan, Co. Meath, sharing education to the Irish embalmers, a first for Ireland.

Glyn Tallon and Karl Wenzel continue to share their professional knowledge with

pre-conference seminar in October 2020 in New Orleans, USA as well as holding seminars in Canada throughout 2020.

Glyn Tallon

embalmers abroad in an effort to better serve families everywhere. Both individuals are recognised for their passion for funeral service success and growth and will be presenting at the National Funeral Directors Association

For further information on upcoming seminars visit Tallon Mortuary Specialist website at: www. tallonmortuaryspecialists. com or the Canadian School of Advanced PREPS website at: www.canadianschoolof advancedprep.com

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Glyn Tallon - 14 Academy Street, Navan, Co. Meath Tel: 086 826 8876 / Fax: 046 903 6001 Web: www.tallonmortuaryspecialists.com Email: info@tallonmortuaryspecialists.com FuneralTimes | 19

Humanist funerals in Northern Ireland

Humanist funerals in Northern Ireland are experiencing year-on-year growth as more families look towards non-religious celebrations of their loved one’s life. In this edition, we find out more about humanism and humanist ceremonies.

What is a humanist funeral?

A humanist funeral is a nonreligious ceremony which focuses on the person who

has died, the life they led, and the relationships they forged.

The ceremony is conducted by a humanist celebrant and it is both a celebration of a life and a dignified, personal farewell. They are an ideal option for families wanting a sincere, personal reflection on the life of their loved one.

Trevor Molloy, Humanist Funeral Celebrant, North Down. Photo by Simple Tapestry.

20 | FuneralTimes

During a humanist funeral, there is time for silent reflection on the life of the deceased. This time is inclusive of people from all backgrounds. People with religious beliefs will often take this opportunity to say a silent prayer.

What is humanism?

Humanism is a ‘worldview’ that can apply to a range of views held by non-religious people who want to lead a good, ethical life. Put simply, humanists are people who shape their lives in the here and now, believing this life to be the only life we have.

How popular are humanist funerals in Northern Ireland?

53% of the UK population now identify as ‘non-religious’, and while this figure is lower in Northern Ireland, the proportion of non-religious people is undeniably growing.

In 2019, Humanist Ceremonies™ celebrants

conducted over 200 funerals across the province - nearly double the number conducted in the previous year.

To meet the growing demand, non-religious charity Northern Ireland Humanists recently trained nine new funeral celebrants who are now members of the Humanist Ceremonies network and conducting ceremonies in Northern Ireland.

Humanist Ceremonies now conducts ceremonies for people in Belfast, Ballymena, Ballycastle, Banbridge, Bangor, Derry, Lisburn, Newtownabbey, and North Down.

Cremation is the most popular choice for those unaffiliated to a particular church, with around twothirds of humanist funerals being conducted at Roselawn Crematorium or at a funeral home with committal service at Roselawn shortly afterwards. However, burials also take place in council-run cemeteries from Sion Mills to Donaghadee and everywhere in between. Many families outside Belfast bemoan the lack of alternative crematoria and there is a strong feeling that they would use a local facility if one existed. Will the return of a functioning government expedite the process? Time will tell!

A recent humanist funeral which gained media attention was that of Belfast artist Ash Reynolds, who spent a year with Rachel Smith planning a colourful celebration of her

Rachel Smith, Humanist Funeral Celebrant, Belfast.

life. Over 700 guests filled The Vault Studios for an hour-long memorial which was entirely appropriate for such a popular local figure. The funerals for Snow Patrol singer Gary Lightbody’s father and for BBC Radio presenter Stephen Clements were also conducted

by Humanists UK celebrants, trusted by funeral directors who know that high standards of professionalism and confidentiality are essential when there is potential public interest.

The role of humanist celebrants in the community Outside of the funeral industry, the legal recognition of humanist weddings in Northern Ireland in August

2018 has seen a massive growth in couples looking to celebrate their marriage in a way that is personal and meaningful to them. Once a family knows a celebrant, they are then keen to use the same person when a naming or funeral is required for a family member. Many Humanist Ceremonies celebrants are now seen as a family friend in the same way that members of the clergy are to others.

Find a celebrant To find your local Humanist Ceremonies celebrant, visit humanistceremonies.org.uk/ find-a-funeral-celebrant. Or you can refer to the directory on the inside cover of this Funeral Times.

FuneralTimes | 21

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Compassionate, dignified and helpful service at Lakelands Crematorium

L

akelands Crematorium, Dublin Road, Cavan welcomes all funeral directors from Northern Ireland with easy access and hasslefree paperwork. We have a large volume of business coming from the North.

Four forms are all that is required. Form A is simply completed by the Funeral Director and Form B by a family member and witnessed by the Funeral Director; no JP is required. An Out of State Cert., which can be obtained from the coroner’s office in Belfast once the death is registered, and a copy of the Death Cert is required. We will then organise Form D from the Irish coroner.

We accept a fax or emailed copy but the original forms must be handed into our office on the day of cremation; there is no extra charge for the weekend or bank holidays. We are open seven days a week and can take a phone call or arrange a cremation at any time.

Every cremation service is unique; we provide individualised services designed to meet the needs of each family. Our staff of dedicated A selection of urns, scatter tubes and jewellery on display professionals are available to assist you in making the arrangements you want to honour your promise to the family. We will work with you to provide the appropriate time needed for the service, understanding how important it is for the family to meet and talk to friends and relations that they might not have seen in a long time. We can also download a favourite song or hymn to be played during the service.

The service can also be viewed on our webcam by family and friends who cannot attend the service. We provide clergy or civil celebrants and we facilitate for all needs to the best of our ability.

Memorial Tree

For further information on booking a cremation please contact our office Tel: 049 4362200/mob: 086 2458489 email: info@lakelandscrematorium.ie or www.lakelandscrematorium.ie FuneralTimes | 23

Everlasting tributes from Forget Me Not Ceramics T

OP quality everlasting ceramic floral displays are now available to purchase locally thanks to a new business based in Kilbeggan.

Forget Me Not Ceramics have brought a beautiful range of colourful floral tributes to the market, ensuring that people can keep the memories of their loved ones forever.

Forget Me Not founder Jane O’Neill came up with the idea for the ornate memorials while on a visit to France where they are a traditional feature of cemeteries.

They are handmade and hand painted and are fully glazed

24 | FuneralTimes

with a durable finish, making them ideal for the Irish climate.

The perfectly formed, and exquisitely detailed ceramic flowers are delicately crafted, resulting in a fitting addition to

all memorials.

The Forget Me Not showroom in Kilbeggan (at the Midlands Gateway Business Park, Comagh Road) is fully stocked with a spectacular array of displays, big and small, each one glazed and gleaming and bursting with colour.

They can be purchased instore or online and Forget Me Not will deliver the ceramics in attractive, well padded, beautifully handcrafted boxes which are keepsakes in themselves.

There are also rose crescents, rose crosses, small posies, single flowers, red and white wreaths, mixed wreaths, rose wreaths, pink sprays and pansy sprays.

Especially striking is the extensive range of covered crosses, with floral options from rose to viola and daisy, to primula and hydrangea.

There are flowers on greenleaved bases and the crosses can be affixed to headstones

or left free-standing on the grave, giving the memorials a classic and timeless look.

They can be used as permanent tributes to those who have recently passed away and as keepsakes for special occasions, marking anniversaries or birthdays.

People can handpick the ceramics they like from the Forget Me Not varied collection and create their own unique display of treasured mementos which will last season after season.

Log onto www.forget menotceramics.ie for more information.

Forget Me Not Ceramics are also on Facebook and Instagram (Forget Me Not Ceramics Ltd) and can be contacted by telephoning 057 933375/085 8622988 or emailing sales@ forgetmenotceramics.ie

FuneralTimes | 25

NAFD News NAFD New Year social media campaign reaches tens of thousands E arly in January, the NAFD launched a social media campaign challenging people to describe their funeral wishes in either a 280-character tweet or a short Facebook post.

“We know people are reluctant to talk about the end of life, but we also know they often can’t resist a social media challenge that involves revealing their likes and dislikes,” said Deborah Smith, who leads communications for the NAFD. “What’s been fantastic about the response to this is that it has sparked discussion - and that’s the whole point. We have to keep trying different ways to help people start a conversation with their loved ones. Even if a quick social media post is all they ever do, just think how much uncertainty that would remove for families in the future.”

By the end of the first week of the campaign it had reached more than 36,000 people, with

26 | FuneralTimes

numerous funeral plans tweeted online. The conversation continued for several days as people shared location ideas, preferred music, what colours, hobbies or interests should be involved and any guidance for mourners.

The funeral wishes tweeted ranged from traditional religious services, to very simple, outdoor services and complex, highly bespoke events. Some tweeters tagged loved ones to ensure they were aware. All of the tweets, whether simple or complex, were highly personal and meaningful to the individual.

There was even a tweet from a dog with its own Twitter account.

It also sparked some conversations with loved ones with one respondent reporting: “I asked my teenage son if he’d like my body at home before my funeral. He visibly recoiled in horror.

‘No bloody way. I don’t want you lying ALL over the sofa BEING dead.’ No, idiot, I’d be in a coffin.

‘Oh yeah,’ he said perking up, ‘that would be OK.’ Glad we got that sorted.”

Some, though, firmly indicated a preference for nothing at all, with one commenting: “Chuck me in a skip. I’ll be dead and couldn’t care less.”

The campaign was shared widely by NAFD member firms, non-member firms, individuals

and organisations including Dying Matters, Humanists UK and Cruse Bereavement Care. To help keep the conversation going, the NAFD is releasing a new version of the video, without the New Year resolution reference and suitable for websites, YouTube and social media, that can be used at any point throughout the year.

The NAFD Class of 2019 graduate in front of their families and friends

F

or this year’s president, David Barrington, the annual Celebration of Success was a particularly special occasion. As an NAFD tutor he has supported many students through their diploma studies over the years, but this year it was a chance to share in the special day of all 76 student.

He told them: “Embarking on any of our courses brings

a kaleidoscope of challenges.

You are all different and have travelled different paths on your journeys. Some of you may work with your family in your family business. Some of you will have started your career in funerals as a driver or bearer when you were at school, and have worked your way up. Some of you may have come to this as

a career change, or as the result of being bereaved yourself, feeling you could give something back to other families in the same situation.

“The desire to better yourselves should be highly commended and I hope that this is the start of a continuous desire to improve your practice for the future.

When I took my diploma, as

FuneralTimes | 27

Representing the needs of almost 4,000 funeral homes, the National Association of Funeral Directors is the “Voice of the Funeral Profession”, supporting members and assuring the public of high standards for more than 100 years.

The NAFD is influential • Consulted by Government on legislative issues • First call for the media on funeral / bereavement issues • Established cross party groups in all four UK Parliaments / Assemblies • Universally endorsed professional qualifications

The NAFD is inclusive • We are financially independent of any other organisation • We campaign on issues affecting all members equally • Members range from small independent firms to groups and Co-operatives • We are totally democratic with one member, one vote - irrespective of the number of funeral homes

The NAFD is supportive • Best benefits package within the sector, saving up to £5,000 a year on essential business costs • Free helplines for financial, legal and employment law, HR, public relations and repatriation issues • Free £5m professional indemnity insurance per UK funeral home member - unique within the sector • Free insurance against tribunal claims, H&S and tax prosecutions

The NAFD is trusted • NAFD members are trusted by consumers to deliver our Funeral Promise: • A funeral that is a fitting farewell, at a price they are comfortable with • Treating bereaved families with respect and acting with integrity • Fulfilling any special wishes and requests • The right to independent redress if the need should arise

Your business will be Stronger by Association with the NAFD. Apply to join today and start taking advantage of the benefits of membership.

Call: Su Lewis on 0121 711 1343 ext. 20.

Visit: www.nafd.org.uk/whyjointhenafd

well as the official learning I also learnt lots from my peers who were on the course with me and something that always strikes me, when I teach a class of students, is how much I learn from them.”

NAFD Chief Executive Jon Levett paid tribute to the families and friends who had supported the students through their studies and predicted a bright future,

saying: “I truly believe that the time and investment you have made in order to have achieved your NAFD qualification will open up amazing opportunities for you in the future, helping you to make the very best of your potential and achieve a successful and rewarding career in the funeral service.”

The 2019 Scales Awards winners, for the highest marks

achieved in the examinations, were Paul Riley (Dip. FAA) and Andrew Jones (Dip. FD).

After the ceremony, the newly minted graduates enjoyed a drinks reception, lunch and celebration with their families, friends and colleagues. Many were also accompanied by their tutors and employers who have supported their studies.

Develop your professional skills in 2020 If you are inspired by the success of the Class of 2019, why not think about adding an NAFD qualification or ongoing CPD to your professional achievements?

The Association’s two Diploma courses provide comprehensive training for funeral service professionals and are considered the gold standard qualifications for the sector. The Diploma in Funeral Arranging & Administration (Dip FAA) and the Diploma in Funeral Directing (Dip FD) are studied for across a period of between 9-15 months (dependent upon the qualification) and are delivered by a team of highly qualified NAFD approved tutors and assessed by the NAFD Board of Examiners.

As well as the two diplomas, the Association is also supported in delivery of its education programme by the London Association

of Funeral Directors, which operates the LAFD Certificate in Funeral Arranging & Administration. Launched in 2007, the twelveweek LAFD Certificate in Funeral Arranging & Administration course has been designed specifically as a qualification for those in the frontline of funeral service.

With both the diplomas and LAFD certificate, graduates are entitled to use a post nominal after their name to indicate their successful completion of the qualification.

For further information about NAFD Training and Qualifications, please contact the NAFD Education team on trainingadmin@ nafd.org.uk, call 0121 711 1343 - or visit nafdeducation.org.uk Full details of the courses and fees can be found on this site.

NAFD launches Consumer Information Awards in Scotland The NAFD is launching Consumer Information Awards (Scotland) for members who show exceptional customer service in respect of the provision of information.

To support the overall drive towards setting the highest standards in Scotland,

silver and gold awards are available to firms which meet an agreed set of standards, including the display of prices, NAFD Code of Practice and NAFD Resolve details clearly on display, together with displaying price details on websites and meeting NAFD standards on service

areas such as providing detailed estimates and invoicing.

FuneralTimes | 29

How many hours does it take to arrange a funeral?

T

o support the submissions it is making on behalf of members to the Competition & Markets Authority, the NAFD has undertaken a comparison of the number of employee hours it takes to arrange a straightforward traditional funeral today, compared to a decade ago.

The results are based on contributions from small independent or family firms, mid-sized firms and larger providers and is inclusive of collecting, preparing, caring for and storing the deceased person, all liaison with the family including facilitating visits to see their loved one - booking all arrangements and completing paperwork, carrying out a typical funeral service, following up payment and arranging any memorial items.

The initial results suggest that it takes, on average, twenty hours more today to arrange a funeral than in 2009 (52 hours, 42 minutes, compared to 32 hours, 53 minutes).

The personalisation and increasing complexity is the main contributor to the change. For example, there is a more than two-fold increase in the length of time the average arrangement meeting lasts (two hours, compared to just under 40 minutes). Previously, there were fewer variables in funeral arrangements, so the meeting generally completed in a shorter period of time. Today, not only are meetings often more complex but members reported more instances of abandonment, where meetings do not end in a contract to arrange the funeral as people are now encouraged to shop around.

However, also contributing to the change is an increase in delays associated with statutory requirements, such as death registration and dealing with coroners/procurators fiscal.

The NAFD is now undertaking a larger exercise

30 | FuneralTimes

to see how these figures compare to other firm’s experiences. For some businesses, the average hours may be fewer but, for others, greater. For example, one medium-sized firm has calculated the average ‘employee weeks’ per funeral in their business today, compared to when they joined the business, because of the changing nature of the funerals they are arranging. They reported that: “we currently need 1.85 employee weeks to deliver a funeral (74 hours). This is an increase of 85% in 40 years.”

Through our own personal experience we received the inspiration to set up Treasured Keepsakes, to give people a wide variety of options upon a loved one’s passing should they choose to keep a lock of hair, cremated remains, a piece of jewellery, a photograph or anything that is a personal reminder of their loved one in a small keepsake, keepsake pendant or urn.

Funeral directors we are currently working with have tailored our service to suit their needs. We have two options of how our service can work for you. If you wish you can buy our products from us at a wholesale price and sell them directly to your clients. Alternatively we can offer this service to your clients directly.

We would hope that by recommending our service we will enhance and add value to your business at no extra cost to you.

For more information contact us or visit our website Tel: 01 825 4579 From NI: 00353 1 825 4579 info@treasuredkeepsakes.ie www.treasuredkeepsakes.ie

NEW PREMISES

for County Down Funeral Director Saintfield funeral directors Norman McBriar & Son are ushering in a new era following their recent half-million-pound investment. The independent funeral directors are proud to once again underline their dedication and devotion to the County Down community following the announcement of their new premises.

E

stablished more than 20 years ago by Norman McBriar, the family-run business provides funeral services including coordinating ceremony arrangements, registrations, funeral planning, headstones, memorials and more.

Previously based on Main Street, Saintfield, Norman McBriar & Son has relocated to new, larger premises in the village, introducing new facilities in a bid to provide a more comprehensive service for the bereaved. The new, larger premises located at 37 Saintfield Mill, Saintfield, offers improved facilities to accommodate the increase in business the company is experiencing, adding four family viewing rooms and a non-denominational service room for private memorials.

The firm are first and foremost a family affair.

Norman’s son, Mark McBriar, is now a Funeral Director himself and partner in the business, having joined his father six years ago. Daughter Donna Spiers similarly joined the business two years ago

32 | FuneralTimes

and has since qualified as a Funeral Director through the Irish Association of Funeral Directors.

Mark points out that “Fewer people are opting for church services. In response to this we’re also introducing a dedicated service room for families without church connections. Here, family, friends and mourners can

gather for a private, nondenominational memorial service or family-only committal.”

We wish the family every success with the new premises and are sure they will continue to reap the rewards they so richly deserve, following their exemplary service to the local community.

The business is family run (L-R) son, Mark McBriar, Norman McBriar and daughter Donna Spiers

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FuneralTimes | 33

BIE News BIE News Ireland Division Hi All, First of all let me take this opportunity to wish all our members, students and families a very happy new year.

At the time of writing this we are looking forward to our 2020 AGM and meeting our new acting State Pathologist, Dr. Linda Mulligan, who will be delivering what can only be described as an enthralling insight into the world of Forensic Pathology.

We are also looking forward to introducing our students and members to the Post Mortem room in a major state hospital. This is an exciting step forward and opportunity for anybody who is interested in seeing the autopsy process.

Individuals names can be put forward at each of our divisional meetings throughout the year.

We have an event filled year planned ahead and lots of surprises in store at

State Pathologist, Dr. Linda Mulligan our divisional meetings. We would encourage as many members as possible to attend, especially to encourage and support our new members receiving their certificates.

Thank you again to those

who continue to support our division which can only grow from strength to strength. See you all soon.

Cyril Gantley

BIE Irish Chairman

WHAT DOES YOUR ORDER OF SERVICE SAY ABOUT YOU? OUR PROMISE TO YOU IS SIMPLE We will answer your calls, 7 days a week - 52 weeks a year We will deliver on time - EVERY time

Telephone: (028/048) 3835 5060

Email: production@inhousepublications.com 34 | FuneralTimes

Northern Division Dear Members and Students, We held our AGM and 1st quarterly meeting on the 8th of January 2020, at James Brown and Son’s Funeral Directors Belfast.

The meeting was very well attended and I want to thank everyone for their participation.

Dr Philip Gore was in attendance, our National President, and he gave a very well received speech.

After the AGM a short meeting was held with new officers in place. A productive discussion was held about the need for more education and how to move forward.

The officers and myself will

make this our priority and we will ensure every meeting this year will have an educational session.

I would like to encourage members and students to contact the secretary or myself, anytime, if you have any ideas or issues you would like to see or have discussed at future meetings.

It was a privilege to be present when Mrs Jackie Graham received her membership certificate from the National President and myself. I know all members, and myself, will wish Mrs Graham all the best in her future ventures.

OUR NEXT MEETING e are pleased to invite Members and Students to Milne Funeral Services Lurgan, on the 22nd April 2020 for our second quarterly meeting.

This meeting will include a hands on Suturing and Waxing workshop. This will be taken by Mrs Ann Shepherd and myself, who will be demonstrating the technique of using “Easy Way”. This is a great opportunity to get hands on experience and I would encourage you to make an effort to attend.

W

Pat Harley MBIE

BIE NI Chairman

Presentation of certificate

Mrs Jackie Graham receiving her certificate from the BIE National President Dr Phillip Gore and BIE Northern Ireland Chairman Pat Harley FuneralTimes | 35

List of BIE Officers and Appointed Representatives for 2020 National President: Dr Phil Gore MBIE Imm. Past President: Barbara Fowley MBIE 1st Vice President: Bobby Hopkin-Hoggarth MBIE National PRO & National General Secretary: Karen Caney FBIE White Meadow Cottage, Brailsford, Derby DE6 3DA Tel: 01332 349035(BIE) Mobile: 07786 432014 E: karencaney@btopenworld. com National Treasurer: Michael Liddle FBIE 10 Yew Tree Close, Silsoe MK45 4EQ Business Tel: 01582 490005 Home Tel: 01525 860117 E: michael@silsloe.wanadoo. co.uk Editor: Gwen Schofield FBIE 9 Seymour Walk, Meltham, Holmfirth HD9 4BP Home Tel: 01484 851994 Mobile: 07778 279100 E: gwen.schofield@ntlworld. com Master Fellow: David Kaye FBIE Student Liaison Officer: David Coster MBIE 36 | FuneralTimes

IRISH DIVISION Chairman: Cyril Gantley MBIE 336 Kildare Road, Crumlin, Dublin 12 Mobile: 085 7671582 E: cyril.gantley@mortuaryscience.ie Secretary: Susan Moran 20 Cedarwood Park, Newbridge, Co. Kildare Mobile: 086 0619500 E: susan.moran@mortuaryscience.ie National Council Rep: Pamela Murphy MBIE 14 Parknasillogue Court, Enniskerry, Co. Wicklow Mobile: 085 7415421 2nd National Council Rep and Treasurer: John Hawe MBIE 12 Meadow Vale, Smith’s Road, Charleville, Co.Cork Mobile: 087 6390087 E: jmhawe@eircom.net NORTHERN IRELAND DIVISION Chairman Pat Harley, MBIE 67 Creggan Road, L’derry BT48 9DA Tel: 07712 899137 E: pat.harley@hotmail.co.uk Vice Chairman: Mrs N Taggart, MBIE 11 Alderley Crescent, Newtownabbey BT36 7WY

Tel: 07917 220073 E: nikkiknockaning@aol.com 1st National Council Representative: Laurence O’Neill MBIE 98 Stewartstown Road, Belfast BT11 9JP Tel: 028 9062 0099 E: oneill8210@hotmail.com 2nd National Council Representative: Ellison Sloan MBIE Tel: 028 3833 6175 Treasurer: Andrew McMullan MBIE 22 High Street, Ballymoney Co. Antrim BT53 6AQ Tel: 028 2766 2265 E: andrew@mcmullanfunerals. com Secretary: Liam Edwin Boyle, MBIE S. Clarke and Son Funeral Directors 12 Court Square, Newtownards, Co. Down BT23 7YN Tel: 07713 575501 E: liamboyle15@hotmail.co.uk 1st Educational Committee Representative: Stephen Shields MBIE James Brown & Sons 300 Newtownards Road, Belfast Tel: 028 9045 1021 E: jamesbrown.belfast@ funeralpartners.com Student Liaison Officer Charlie Poots MBIE

www.coachbuilders.ie sales@coachbuilders.ie Tel: +353 87 269 0044 Ballyfinane, Firies, Killarney, Co. Kerry

FuneralTimes | 1

Exit here...

funeral homes of the future?

Successful Sligo-born restaurateur and food critic, Oliver Peyton’s newest project may be his most ambitious to date. A far cry from a concept café or edgy dining experience, Oliver is aiming to shake up the funeral industry with ‘Exit Here’, a modern take on the traditional funeral home.

Mr Peyton is a man for whom mortality is not a taboo subject to be ignored, with a Spotify playlist preprepared for his own funeral, featuring Dublin rockers Thin Lizzy. Having had a long and successful career, much of which has been achieved in London, the restaurateur is also a judge on popular BBC reality Chef show, Great British Menu.

38 | FuneralTimes

Oliver Peyton Peyton wishes for as much of his own funeral to be prearranged as possible, taking the stress and strain of trying to guess his wishes away from his friends and family.

Upon the death of his father six years ago, it struck him that the range of choices in the funeral industry was limited, constricted by working under the traditional model of commemoration, one

which did not suit his own requirements at the time. This spurred him to pursue his idea to open ‘Exit Here’ in London’s Chiswick neighbourhood.

The funeral parlour is not what one might expect, resembling a trendy concept café at first glance, while the neon-backlit text adorning the entrance may be associated more with a throwback bar.

Despite this, the company prides itself as a full-service provider of all funeral and mortuary services. If you want a horse and cart, it’s not a problem, if you prefer rooftop drinks in Budapest, they will sort that too!

It has been described as ‘Death, but hipper’, taking a tongue ‘n’ cheek approach to proceedings.

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Hassan Funeral Directors R

espected County Antrim Funeral Director Sean Hassan has sadly announced his retirement recently, handing over the mantle to new proprietor Declan Stephens. Sean Hassan Funeral Services was established in 1972 by Sean and his wife Caroline, situated at 45 Warden Street, Ballymena.

The bedrock of Sean’s business has been attention to detail, with a genuine sense of care, professionalism and empathy being afforded to all those who picked up the phone in their time of need.

Having a base for what was already a 24 hour service was always important and, in 2001, Hassan Funeral Directors opened a Funeral Home, consisting of a beautiful Chapel of Rest, a coffin showroom, memorial showroom and two viewing rooms. An embalming theatre is also discreetly located at the rear of the premises. The Chapel of Rest itself remains open 365 days a year from 9am to 10pm for those who need it most.

Declan Stephens, proprietor of Hassan Funeral Service, along with the premises Much as Sean has proudly dedicated himself with love and genuine care to the local community and the industry throughout almost 50 years of service, Declan plans to follow in his footsteps, having trained with and worked alongside Sean. The firm has and will continue to be a full service business, offering help and assistance in everything from organising the ceremony and burial arrangements to choosing hymns and headstones. Sean himself will remain an influential part of the business alongside Declan, working behind the scenes, in an advisory role.

They will continue to operate from their convenient town centre location on Warden Street, now operating under the name Hassan Funeral Services.

We at Funeral Times have had the opportunity to

get to know and work with Sean a great deal over the past number of years and can say without doubt that his presence, personality and humour will be sorely missed, not just by ourselves, but by friends and colleagues in the community and the industry.

We wish Declan all the very best with his new endeavour and look forward to continuing to work closely with him in the future.

FuneralTimes | 41

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Paul Wilcox serves 50 years at helm of Wilcox Limousines C

EO Paul Wilcox, of Wilcox Limousines the UK’s leading funeral vehicle coachbuilder is celebrating leading the flagship company for 50 years on 1st January 2020.

Paul started working at the company aged just 14 years during school holidays, his parents founded the business in 1948. However, on 1st January 1970 Paul officially joined the company as a full time employee alongside his older brother Peter Wilcox.

Together Peter and Paul ran the company for over 40 years.

Paul Wilcox is now the CEO

with his eldest daughter Jade Webb Wilcox as Managing Director, other family members are nephew Louis Wilcox, Sales Director and daughter Leila Wilcox, International Sales and Marketing.

“There is no doubt that having a brother as a partner has given us an advantage.

Today is both a very exciting and yet challenging time, the business in over 70 years of trading has never experienced anything like Brexit before, however due to the launch of the stunning new Jaguar XF range and our ever loyal customer base, business continues to thrive.

Paul and Peter Wilcox with their mum back in the day!

I’m looking forward to seeing the next generation of family members including my daughters and nephew take the business to the next level and to see what they achieve in the next 50 years!”

Wilcox Limousines, the UK’s only Jaguar Cars approved convertor is a third generation family business with over 70 years of coachbuilding experience. They have supplemented the Jaguar XJ range with a Jaguar XF based UK hearse and limousine, after the huge success of XF 3 door launch internationally. The new range includes a 5 door Hearse and matching 6 door Limousine which have been designed for the UK Market.

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2020 Vision

By Dr Bill Webster

T

here was a point last year when I was ready to write my “retirement” article.

After all, I am not getting any younger. It will be 100 years in June since my mother was born, and this year I will be the age she was when she died. I have outlived my father, my first wife and more recently my youngest son.

In my work, I have made a significant contribution to the field of grief support which peak culminated last year when I was awarded the British Citizen’s Medal in London “for exceptional positive impact to society as an inspiration to others.” That makes it all worthwhile.

But there is one problem. I don’t feel like I am finished yet!

I have 2020 vision. I am not referring to my physical eyesight. Rather, my 2020 vision is a goal to make one more major international contribution to the field of grief support this year by offering a programme of support that will be available to participants without cost.

This venture is not about business, it is about LEGACY. Grief support in my opinion has to be more than a commercial or financial venture, and I plan to address what I feel has become a serious imbalance in this area. With a proposed launch in the spring, I will keep people informed.

But while we are talking about retirement here is a vital question that those considering the prospect have to answer. It’s not “What are you retiring from?”, but “What are you retiring TO?” If we cannot answer that second question, we could be in trouble.

Everyone knows you need to get ready financially for retirement; but actually even more importantly, you need to get ready psychologically. We spend about 20 years of

46 | FuneralTimes

our lives preparing to be a success; then we spend the next 30-40 years being as successful as we can in our work. As Vince Lombardi the football coach said, “The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.”

Think of what we lose when we retire from work: A) The loss of structure, as comfortable, regular routines disappear; Oh yes, there is still that long overdue “honey-do” list but is that enough? (My wife and I have differing views on this!)

B) The loss of identity, inasmuch as many find “themselves” in what they DO as much as by who they are. Even after retirement people will often identify themselves by their jobs or professions C) The loss of relationship, with colleagues, clients, the public, missing the social interaction and camaraderie with people you have seen every day D) The loss of power or authority offered by your position or your responsibilities at work.

But perhaps most significant is the loss of a sense of purpose. The crucial element for survival, whether I work or retire, is being able to recognize that there is still a purpose for my life.

The brain works like a bicycle. A bike is a welloiled machine, which when it moves at speed is efficient and effective moving you forward in whatever direction. When a bicycle slows down however, it becomes much more difficult to control. And when it comes to a complete stop, you get off.. or fall off. We can slow down in life but we have to keep going.

Whether after a death or a life loss like retirement, illness (or many other examples), feeling “loss” and feeling “lost” is always

challenging. If unresolved, it can lead to marital discord, depression, increased dependency on alcohol or medications, and a general lethargy with life. It’s not pretty to watch, and I am determined not to let it happen.

So throughout my own grief process of the last year, I have come to the following conclusions about myself and my life: 1. I want to live the life I want to lead, however long or short, and refuse to let the unknown shape my destiny 2. I know what values and priorities really matter in my life and will spend my days reflecting on and accomplishing my purpose

3. My legacy will be: my passion + my gifts and strengths + my desire to make a difference 4. I want my obituary to echo what was really important to me, so I will try to “invest” in those objectives every day 5. I will live every day as if it were my last, while loving, learning, serving and growing as if I would live forever 6. Above all, despite my losses, I am still standing and I am not finished yet.

So what’s your 20/20 vision for 2020?

Remember, happiness is not about what happens, but what we do about whatever happens. Bon voyage for the year ahead!

First you hurt, then you heal Dr Bill Webster understands grief not just in theory, but also from personal experience. In his book, “First you Hurt, Then you Heal”, Dr Bill outlines a road map for the grief journey in a series of articles that take us through the process .

He begins with a chapter entitled “I Didn’t Plan for This” that gives people an understanding of what they may experience in the early days after a loss. The book then goes on to give us an understanding of grief, some insights into various situations of loss, and some strategies to help us work through the process.

This book will be a helpful resource for those who are going through a grief process as well as containing much relevant and practical information for those who would like to know what they can say and how they can help someone who has experienced a significant loss. It will also serve as a basic knowledge and layman’s guide for those in the helping professions such as nurses, teachers, funeral directors and those who seek to support grieving people, young and old, through their work. “First you Hurt, Then you Heal” provides practical, down to earth and effective insight into one of the most difficult topics and most misunderstood experiences of life.

First you Hurt, Then you Heal: A Road Map for the Grief Journey (Kindle Edition) is avaialble to buy on Amazon.

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Co. Armagh funeral director gains Education Award A

ndrew Milne, of Milne Funeral Services, Co. Armagh, has successfully completed a prestigious professional qualification with the Independent Funeral Directors’ College.

As a result, he has gained the highest qualification awarded by the IFD College.

Following his success, Andrew Milne Cert. F.P. has now been invited to become a Member of the Independent Funeral Directors’ College.

Andrew’s father, Ian Milne, former Federation Chairman of the National Association of Funeral Directors, underlined the importance of accreditation within the funeral industry.

“Setting standards for education, registration, ethics and practice are the core function of any regulatory scheme, and the review currently underway by the Competition and Markets Authority is likely to be a catalyst for change,” he said,

adding that, “this can only bode well for public confidence in the future.

“This is a continuation of a lifelong journey of learning for Andrew in his career as a funeral director, since he has already completed many industry-related courses, thus, giving me great confidence for the long-term future and professionalism of Milne Funeral Services.”

Mandy Lavin, former Chief

Executive of the National Association of Funeral Directors, commented: “Professional standards demonstrate a commitment to protecting the public and promoting public confidence in funeral directors.

“The public interest demands and deserves, high and consistent professional standards from funeral directors. Education and training are at the heart of that.”

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New ‘Wilcox’ Volvo hearse for Arthur Worsley Funeral Services Ltd A rthur Worsley Funeral Services has been established for over 140 years.

The funeral home is located in Hadfield, Glossop. Jason

and Julie Eyre now oversee the business? Brenda Worsley, though semi-retired, also remains involved.

Jason, Julie and Sam chose

Sam Eyre and Martin Hallam standing alongside their new Volvo S90 Hearse supplied by Wilcox Limousines Ltd.

a bespoke hearse with options including bench seat format, additional front and rear chrome and electric deck signs. The vehicle comes standard with a high specification including Sat Nav, Active Cruise Control, Heated Seats, LED Lighting, and Lane Departure Warning. It is available in both petrol and diesel engines.

Wilcox Limousines Ltd would like to thank Jason, Julie and Sam for their continued business and wish them every success with their latest vehicle.

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• Daily service operates to/from England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales • Mortuary collections nationwide • All vehicles fully insured • Quotations available on request For further information contact Gary T:07789 134798 or Ciara T:07425 156451 FuneralTimes | 51

Join the association that’s leading the way.

Representing and promoting the interests of 850 independent funeral directors.

SAIF is at the forefront of tackling the big industry issues that matter to you.

As the united voice of independent funeral directors we have led the way in setting the highest standards of professionalism and conduct within the industry. By joining SAIF you too can demonstrate that you uphold this same commitment.

For over 25 years SAIF has been promoting and protecting the interests and values of independent funeral directors. Supporting our members is at the heart of everything we do, listening, responding and engaging to secure your independent future.

Join SAIF now: visit saif.org.uk or call us on 0345 230 6777 or 01279 726 777

Saif News Saif News SAIF Membership M

any funeral directors are seeing the benefit of joining SAIF - the only Trade Association specifically for Independent Funeral Directors. SAIF has seen a rise in membership in 2019 currently with over 935 members.

Please feel assured that as our membership grows the dedication to each member remains the same. We aim to answer your queries and concerns without delay and the support given to each member is as strong as it has always been.

As a reminder the key benefits of membership are: • Dispute Resolution Scheme: a complaints procedure, investigation and, if required, resolution scheme giving extra confidence to your client • Events: including an annual banquet weekend, regional meetings and online training • HR Resource Centre: Members of SAIF can access advice through the members’ areas of the website, and book telephone appointments at SAIF Business Centre.

• NEXTGen: Have created several platforms for all its members to have a supporting body of likeminded business people who also share the stresses and strains of being “The future leaders of their businesses” • Professional Indemnity Insurance: standard inclusion at no extra cost • Quality Assurance Inspections: regular inspections with guidance on correct procedures, protocol and best practice • SAIF Acquisition: An introduction agency for any independent owners who wish to consider

selling their business to another independent, so that their name is safeguarded with common vision and values.

• SAIF Business Centre: a friendly, efficient team to help with any enquiry • SAIFCharter: financial incentives for members who exclusively sell Golden Charter Funeral Plans • SAIF Helpline: free help with tax and legal advice • SAIFInsight: monthly magazine (print and online) to keep you up to date with industry news and views • SAIF Logo: for all stationery and advertising material, demonstrating to members of the public that you are a respected professional • SAIF Members’ Website: featuring downloadable templates, guidance notes and webinars, along with details of the SAIF AGM, regional meetings and education days • SAIFSupport: free and confidential service run

by Professional Help – a member of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy – offering help for funeral directors and their staff who are distressed, under acute pressure or suffering with depression • SAIFCare: a telephone bereavement careline and email support -a FREE benefit to ALL SAIF member firms • Unrivalled knowledge: access to SAIF officers and an Executive with a vast range of funeral directing experience across the UK As well various discounted services and support.

If you would like more information about joining SAIF and being able to access benefits including Professional Indemnity Insurance, please don’t hesitate to contact the SAIF Business Centre; we are only a phone call away and will be happy to help.

Tel: 0345 230 6777 or visit SAIF.org.uk FuneralTimes | 53

SAIF AGM/Banquet Weekend 13th - 15th March 2020 - Grand Hotel, Glasgow

B

ookings for this year’s Banquet weekend are now open and places can be booked by visiting the SAIF website.

We would also urge our members who wish to attend to book as soon as possible, especially if looking to stay at the Grand Hotel due to

The Grand Central Hotel, Glasgow

number allocation.

For those that book the Saturday lunch and Banquet there is a £5 discount. Please visit the SAIF website for further information and to book your place https:// saif.org.uk/events/saif-agmbanquet-weekend-13th-to15th-march-2020/

New Delivery - Fearghas Quinn

New 5door E-Class for Finnegan’s Funeral Home, Cavan, by Quinn Hearse & Limousine

Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust acknowledged The Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust has been acknowledged for their invaluable work, by Simon Coveney, Tánaiste and Minister for Foreign Affairs and Trade.

The Department recently released figures for 2019, outlining the interactions with a range of departments and areas such as consular assistance. One striking piece of information was that over 260 families sought the direct 54 | FuneralTimes

support of officials after the death of a loved one abroad. Mr Coveney went some way to explain the scale of the figure, offering that the number of Irish people travelling abroad continues to grow year on year. The Minister was keen to acknowledge the work carried out by a number of partner organisations, including the Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust.

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| 1 FuneralTimes l

Jennifer is author of ‘Say Farewell Your Way’ - a funeral planning guide for Ireland, blogger of www.theglamreaper.blogspot.com, creator of Irish Glass Memorial Jewellery line: Humans www.celtic-ashes.com; Pets - www.rainbowbridge-memorials.com, planner of Memorials at funeral homes and talker - @TheGlamReaper on Twitter and Tedx 2017 Any questions just ask - muldowney.jennifer@gmail.com

By Jennifer Muldowney

Pet funerals

Why they are important

D

o you have a dog? A Cat? A horse? A parrot? A guinea pig?

For me, a house is not a home without a pet. No one greets you or loves you unconditionally like a pet.

You could tell a pet of some heinous crime that you have committed and they will still wag their tail, purr (or similar) just to keep listening to your voice and keep your devoted attention. It is incredible the amount of comfort animals can bring to the elderly and the disabled and the grief stricken in your community.

10 years ago, my family and I had a horrendous decision

56 | FuneralTimes

to make; of whether to put our beloved 16 year-old west highland terrier, Roxy, down or keep her alive even though she was in pain and suffering from strokes daily. We chose to be kind, or so we think. I still have my doubts to this day whether we were selfish or kind by doing so. I guess one never knows. Her eyes never left mine as she passed away.

It seems self-indulgent to even think of mourning a pet when faced with human loss and so feelings get hidden and grief buried deep. But what if, as funeral directors, you help your community to embrace this loss in the open and amongst loved ones.

Can you equip your funeral home to offer funerals for beloved pets? Can you work with a pet crematorium like Cranmore or your local community veterinarian to offer pet funerals to the families that I am sure you

already serve? Maybe there is someone who already works for you that is an animal lover and would happily take this extra service on as a new project? It is worth considering as a new way to help your community even more and to add a revenue stream to your business.

I know 10 years ago, if I knew it was a service that would have been offered, I would have taken the opportunity to say goodbye to Roxy in a service absolutely.

Obit is 2020-Ready!

Happy New Year to all present and future Obit users!

We’ve had a busy 2019 on the Obit team, launching six major releases, with notable improvements like: • Improved Google Places integration to save time and mistakes entering long addresses.

• It’s now easier to manage your Cash Book in our Finance Section.

• We introduced a new finegrained Permission setup which lets you limit access

by branch when working in multi-branch companies.

• We’ve improved our Funeral Overview giving you a quick summary of all important info and anything that might be missing.

• Streamlined core processes like adding Contacts and Places to Funeral, reducing the amount of time needed to load a funeral.

• Customers can now import historical funeral data via an Excel or CSV file.

• Two Factor Authentication to

improve security.

In addition, we’ve made many other updates and improvements based on suggestions or requests from Funeral Directors as well as continually striving to provide the best performance and security possible.

If you are thinking of joining the Obit Community, email us at sales@obit.ie or call Richard on +353 (0) 86 771 6099 to organise your free trial.

FuneralTimes | 57

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58 | FuneralTimes

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FuneralTimes | 59

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WT Morrison assist with road safety demo W

T Morrison Funeral Directors, Enniskillen supplied the hearse and coffin to assist the emergency services with their road safety message to years 13 and 14 at Enniskillen Royal Grammar School.

The scenario based around a road traffic collision showcased the work carried out by the emergency services and delivered a hard hitting

and reflective message about the dangers on our roads and the potential consequences.

Thanks to Station Commander Curran NIFRS for the invitation to take part along with the Northern Ireland Ambulance Service, PSNI and Fermanagh and Omagh PCSP.

FuneralTimes | 61

can help yourself and others.

Consultant Stroke Physician, Dr Brian Gallen, sits on Northern Ireland Chest Heart and Stroke’s Board of Governors and believes many of the patients he works with had a TIA before their full stroke, often without realising.

Stroke and Carers Support

Northern Ireland & Stroke Groups:Chest providingHeart the chance to take part in activities to build confidence and increase independence with people in similar situations.

New JAM card will make life sweeter for chest, heart and stroke survivors

“I regularly see patients who have had a Transient Ischaemic Attack (TIA) or mini-stroke, before their full stroke. Some have been diagnosed but often whencharity I am assessing Local Northern Ireland Chest and treating them, they will tell me Heart and Stroke about other recent symptoms, (NICHS) has teamed which in retrospect I believe were up with Belfast based social enterprise signs of a TIA.

NOW Group to launch a specific JAM

PREP & Taking Control Programmes: helping to rebuild lives and confidence.

Prevention: individual health advice and public health awareness campaigns.

Research: funding ground– breaking local research which changes lives.

“Every day I see the devastation Card for Ipeople living with chest, heart How your donations support our that stroke causes. see patients work. who have a life of disability ahead and stroke conditions.Dr Brian Gallen, Consultant £10 – Will provide 25 crucial ‘Life of them, partners and families who Stroke Physician.

After Stroke’ information booklets, become carers overnight, and of to help stroke survivors rebuild course the grief of those whose Card, which stands forif ‘Just a gets treatment their lives. loved oneshe didJAM not survive. that someone for a TIA, through Minute’, was originally developed by the a TIA clinic, their “There are many ways to prevent a risk of a full stroke is reduced. A TIA £17 – Pays for a visit from a Stroke Group which Family Support Co-ordinator in the strokeNOW happening in the firstsupports place is a warning sign that cannot be aftermath of a stroke. and apeople good place start is bydifficulties ignored.” withtolearning and autism. recognising the body’s own warning Northern Chest and Stroke has launched an £25 – Pays for one person to mechanism, theIreland TIA. There’s a Heart NICHS has recently attend a PREP scheme for a week. leafletreproduced enclosed with this pack awareness campaign to highlight the card for anyone living with which lists the warning signs to look what you need to know about mini chest, heart and stroke conditions.

This £50 – Will enable up to 5 people out for. strokes.

Forincludes more information on to attend NICHS’s weekly Stroke the ‘Mini Stroke, people who are experiencing physical and Massive Warning’ Activity Groups.

“A TIA has the same symptoms and campaign visit www.nichs.org.uk/ causes as a full stroke. duringof a their cognitive issues But because illness, such as ministroke £100 – Will pay for 4 hours of a TIA the body breaks down the clot heart and stroke JAM Card will help everyone difficulty communicating, clinical researcher’s time, to carry before lasting damage has been memory loss, mobility out research intoto theretain diagnosis doneand to the brain. issues or breathlessness. The Jam living with these conditions their balance and treatment of chest, heart and independence and illnesses. increase their confidence them with a discreet way of stroke “But Card when provides you are experiencing the symptoms, you don’t know if 1 in 10 people who have a mini in a variety of situations, letting people know that they may sometimes they will go away or not, so you need stroke will suffer a full stroke knowing that they to callneed 999. a little extra time and patience. within a week.

Currently there are 335,000 people in Northern can alert others about their “The statistics say it all – 1 in 10 How NICHS can help: condition and ask for a little Ireland living with or stroke people who have a TIA goaonchest, to heart Stroke Family Support: helping have condition, a full stroke within a week. families in the difficult days more patience and many of whom experience a huge However a recent study has shown following a stroke. understanding. impact on their daily life as a result. The chest,

T

To request a chest, heart and stroke condition JAM Card, please contact Northern Ireland Chest Heart and Stroke by visiting: www.nichs.org.uk/JAMCard or call T: 028 9032 0184

NICHS_lift_A4_v3.indd 1

62 | FuneralTimes

09/05/2018 20:57

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Desmond and Helen, of D Watters Funeral Services, Tobermore with their E-Class Hearse provided by Quinn Hearse & Limousine

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Leading a funeral isn’t about me!

By Padraic Cawley Civil Funeral Celebrant Any Funeral Service that I design and lead is written all around one person.

That person gets centre stage with their life story.

They’re in the spotlight too for the very last time. So I’m very clear that the first name I want you to hear in the service is that of the person who’s died. I also want their name to be the last one that you hear at the end of the service and before you leave.

For that very reason, you’ll never hear me introduce myself or my role. My name doesn’t matter. Nor does my title. What matters is that a Funeral Service is being held for a very special person

and that people have come together to remember them - not to learn about process, structure or any one person’s ego.

So of course I’ve been approached by many people after a service, asking who I am and where I’m from. They’re interesting conversations to have and they happen at the right time to have them then. But more importantly, they give me the chance to address individual curiosity, rather than levy my professional status in a blanket approach.

We go to a Funeral to say our Final Goodbyes to someone who’s mattered

to us. If that person at the front has made you curious through the experience, then so be it.

I’m always conscious of how the ceremony experience will ripple on for everyone long after the day has drawn to a close.

It’s not just about the words used or how they’re delivered.

It’s about how everyone is made to feel part of what’s happening and how they understand their own role in the celebration.

Holding space for everyone to make those connections during the ceremony is a big part of what I do - and it always will be.

FuneralTimes | 65

Matt Black has been a licensed funeral director and embalmer in the State of Pennsylvania for over 20 years. He represents The Dodge Company in Central and Western Pennsylvania. In addition to being a graduate of the Pittsburgh Institute of Science, Matt also holds degrees in Bio-Medical Engineering Technology and Industrial Management.

Crafting a BETTER viewing When you consider current practices in funeral service, does anything stand out as “missing”? What have we traditionally done that seems to be fading away? Without question, the open casket viewing would fall into this category.

The open casket viewing is the most “personal” element of any funeral service. One can display all the mementos one wishes, but not including a viewing as part of a funeral service is like having a wedding ceremony without the bride or groom being present. As funeral professionals, we possess the ability to provide an opportunity for the all-important open casket viewing. We allow the family to say, “Hello again, and goodbye.” We have all heard that you only get one chance to create a positive first impression. We are uniquely qualified to provide a positive, and lasting, final impression.

We have all witnessed occasions when, in spite of difficult circumstances, a viewing provided comfort and a time for everyone to say goodbye to a loved one in their own personal way. This is especially true in the case of a traumatic or unforeseen death. These open casket viewings provide a measure of social support to the family. Seeing the loved one for the last time and being able to say goodbye can provide real comfort. Regardless of the method chosen for final disposition, the open casket viewing can be of great help to family and friends in navigating the grieving and mourning process.

We are constantly being challenged on the value of open casket viewing. A common problem is a lack of communication between the embalmer and the funeral director making the arrangement, and the family. We all have 66 | FuneralTimes

found ourselves with a picture of the loved one that is many years old and can see a dramatic change in body weight. Photos provided by families usually confirm that a significant weight loss has occurred. While most photos only show the face, if weight loss is shown on the face, we can deduce that the hands have suffered the same effect. But should we assume that the photo provided is a clear indication of the degree to which the family desires feature building restoration? We need an open communication with the family to reach a full understanding of their expectations. Discussion and communication allow the family to open up, which is very therapeutic.

An area I would like to discuss is communication with the family when we are employing Feature Builder to restore a natural appearance. When used correctly, Feature Builder can fill out sunken emaciated tissue of the face, including sunken temporal areas, the cheeks, the lips, the nose, and the lobes of the ears. Don’t forget the hands! Restoring flat fingertips as well as the natural features and contours of the face can help give a life-like appearance. Our families deserve as much care given to the hands as we give to the face.

Dodge Feature Builder is available in two varieties: Regular and Firming. Feature Builder Regular is used for plumping and restoration when the tissue is preserved from the arterial embalming process.

Feature Builder Firming is unique in that it has the dual purpose of plumping tissue while imparting preservation due to its chemical makeup. It works well on under-embalmed areas of the hands and face that lack preservation which can lead to decomposition issues.

As embalmers we should not be concerned with leakage from feature building. It is always recommended to use premium feature building products that gel quickly when exposed to moisture. Feature Builder will not change shape, cause discoloration, or affect embalming chemicals.

Let’s consider feature building as a postembalming technique. When feature building emaciated cases, you will encounter tissue with significantly diminished moisture retention.

A few techniques that help to control any minuscule leakage during the feature building process on these emaciated cases include: • Before removing your hypodermic needle, draw back on the syringe plunger 1/8 inch.

This will air-lock the opening when removing the hypodermic needle by inducing a small air bubble to seal the exit hole in the tissue. • Apply a pad of Webril or cotton saturated with water to the exit hole following removal of the hypodermic needle, allowing the water to help gel any liquid Feature Builder. • Apply a small dab of Kalon Massage Cream over the exit hole immediately after removing

the hypodermic needle.

These effective techniques can be used alone or in combination to resolve any leakage of tissue builder while restoring the hands. Best practices when feature building dictate that the fewest tissue punctures we can employ is our goal. Careful consideration when choosing the hypodermic needle will help achieve this goal.

Using an 18-gauge needle that is 6� long or a 19-gauge needle that is 3� long can reach a lot of areas. Having spoken with many embalmers, a 20-cc syringe seems to be the one most commonly used for control purposes. For example, the entire finger can be treated if you enter around the first knuckle. The temporal area can be plumped by entering the hairline area of temples. Using a hairline area of the eyebrow is advantageous because it’s a hidden area and gives you access to a lot of coverage area. Another great entry point to gain access for Feature Builder is through the nose. It allows hidden access for many areas of the cheeks, the zygomatic arch, the nasolabial folds, and more.

A longer needle allows fewer entry points and, when restoring the hands, at times the point

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can be camouflaged by using entry points in the wrist. Remember to include areas of the forehead, neck, nose, ears, and lips for fully effective restorative treatment.

Be cautious and guard against using too little or too much Feature Builder. One example of too little treatment is only filling out the fingertips, while giving no attention to the rest of the finger or the hand. This also can happen in the face if you inject the temporal area of the face and disregard other areas of the face.

Too much feature building can be worse than doing no feature building. The overload of Feature Builder results in stretched tissue resembling an over-filled balloon. We should not necessarily be striving to achieve perfection, but rather to reinstate a pleasing, natural appearance, including lines and wrinkles, and these treatments can lead us to that goal. We have all experienced that situation when we stopped short of what we might have thought necessary, only to have our family thank us for achieving “perfection.”

Again, a photo provided by the family, combined with clear and open communication with the family, will provide an invaluable guideline for you to present the family with realistic expectations.

A simple goal for every practitioner is to recreate a natural and pleasing appearance of the deceased entrusted to our care. At times we lose this focus by allowing ourselves to concentrate on only the “big picture” when the small details can be the key to success.

Let’s revisit a technique that, in my opinion, seems to be falling out of popularity. To the disappointment of many and the pride of others, wrinkles are a natural part of the aging process. As we age our skin gets thinner and drier, and loses elasticity and some of its ability to protect itself. This leads to wrinkles, creases, and lines on the skin of the face and hands.

In order to achieve success in restoring the 68 | FuneralTimes

face and hands to their normal state one must determine which markings are natural and should remain and which markings are unnatural.

A common pre and postmortem condition is edema in the hands, face, and eyes, as well as many non-visible areas of the body. This is becoming more prevalent with the increased use of intravenous fluids during medical interventions.

Improperly treated, edema can present a host of issues that can keep the embalmer awake at night.

However, gross edema can normally be successfully treated with waterless embalming, edema co-injection chemicals, channeling, gravity, and time. The upside of these treatments is we achieve preservation.

Channeling and gravity are highly effective for reducing edema and the resultant swelling.

When channeling a hand, select an entry point below the wrist area and move the needle in a fan-like motion. The advantage of this area is that it is hidden and can be concealed with plastic to control leakage if necessary. Once channeling has been concluded and the needle removed, apply a coating of Kalon Massage Cream or Restorative to the hand area. This will prevent any damage to the skin. Digital pressure can be used, physically forcing the fluid out of the entry point. This technique may have to be repeated for severe edema and employed on multiple areas of the body. When channeling is successful, we are left with unnatural wrinkles on the face and hands of the deceased. These wrinkles are from size reduction.

A Dodge Tissue Reducer is an effective tool for treating these unsightly wrinkles on the face, hands, and neck. For those embalmers who may be unfamiliar with this item, a Tissue Reducer is an electric, heated iron designed to be used on the deceased, embalmed body. Admittedly some embalmers find this

technique intimidating. But, with some careful practice we can achieve a level of comfort and expertise allowing restoration of a more natural appearance of the hands without hesitation. A critical factor in achieving success with a Tissue Reducer is that the tissue needs to be well embalmed. Spongy or non-fixated tissue presents unnecessary, and possibly insurmountable, challenges to achieving positive results with the Tissue Reducer. The success or failure of employing the Tissue Reducer is directly related to the condition of the skin and the quality of the embalmed tissue.

Using a Tissue Reducer directly on bare skin for the reduction of wrinkles, without any provision for protecting the tissue, is an invitation to disaster. This non-advised technique causes rapid dehydration, physically burns the tissue, and destroys and/or curls the hair on lashes or brows. A popular and strongly recommended technique is to apply a liberal layer of Kalon Massage Cream to the area being treated.

The use of petroleum jelly or similar products is not advised. The petroleum elements, when heated, can cause serious burn damage to the tissue. Additionally, they seem to make cosmetic application much more difficult and the tissue seems to be spongier.

When using a Tissue Reducer, the smaller heating element tip allows greater control and more effective results. Allow the Tissue Reducer to heat up for approximately five minutes and hold it like a pencil. The heating element tip should be hot enough to make the massage cream melt and “sizzle” when touched. Touch the tip in a repetitive manner over the tissue, using light pressure to remove the wrinkle. In severe cases a repeated application of Kalon Massage Cream and treatment with the Tissue Reducer may be necessary. This rapid heating of the massage cream will cause the skin surface tissue to tighten. The massage cream also inhibits burning of the skin tissue. When using Tissue Reducers around the delicate areas of the eye, pressure and movement are the keys to success. Use less pressure and quicker movement on contact to the tissue.

Some key points to keep in mind when using the Tissue Reducer: • Only touch the skin with the Tissue Reducer after applying a liberal amount of Kalon Massage Cream.

• Allow the Tissue Reducer to reach its maximum heating temperature. Consider using two Tissue Reducers and rotating them in use to allow optimum temperature. Caution must be employed when using these devices: do not touch with bare hands, and allow for a cooling period before placing them back in storage. Do not touch hair, eyelashes, or flammable materials with the Tissue Reducer.

• Quicken your movement of the reducer when around the delicate tissue of the eyes and decrease pressure.

Using these techniques can make a drastic improvement and make a more natural appearance of the face, hands, and neck.

As embalmers, we should all agree that we need to master techniques to maximize our ability to enhance the open casket viewing. The techniques reviewed in this article are but a few of the many procedures we have learned, and quite possibly forgotten, in our careers, that allow us to offer the best possible service to those families that entrust their loved ones to our care. By keeping our skills sharp and our minds open to processes we have not yet tried, we position ourselves to be able to confidently address any situation we may be presented with. A common adage is, “ Your reward is the comfort given by your attention to details.”

Every individual that has been involved in the funeral industry for even a short time has witnessed numerous changes and, it is reasonable to assume, that change will continue to inundate us as we strive to meet the needs of all.

But one thing has remained and will remain constant...the expectation on the part of the bereaved to believe that the funeral professional in whom they have placed their trust will possess the skills, abilities, and attention to detail to meet their every need.

If you would like to be added to the mailing list for the complementary Dodge Magazine which is printed quarterly or would like to discuss any of the products mentioned in this article, please contact us at: Shepherds Funeral Supplies, Unit 2A Royal Canal Business Park, Athlone Road, Co. Longford.

Ph. 00353 43 33 49702 /00353 87 2486668 FuneralTimes | 69

The next regeneration

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Future compost and a Munster exhumation

By Mattie Lennon

I

n 1978 a man in Munster was buried twice. The late Great John B. Keane wrote a ballad, to the air of Skibbereen, on the subject, titled The Ballad of Con Carey. There is a radio documentary on the subject which is well worth listening to. Here is the link: https://www.rte.ie/radio1/doconone/ 2014/1107/657531-con-carey-brosna-kerry-twelve-apostles/ In the meantime here’s John B’s take on;

Come all ye loyal heroes and listen to my lay ’Tis all about Con Carey who was taken from the clay The papers all, they had a ball and the guards made up a case Not since the time of Lazarus did such a thing take place At the tender age of sixty nine Con Carey’s final breath Was drawn within a building site upon his native heath He fell to foul exposure as he homeward made his way But alas the clothes he wore that night were only work-a-day

With these upon his unwashed frame, Con Carey was interred And from the sealed-up ashen lips, no hostile word was heard But round the grave, his comrades brave were conscious of his plight And silently they did resolve to set the matter right Con Carey The sun was high in the mid-day sky when the cars drew to a halt Out stepped the crew that then did view each mound and cross and vault With eyes so keen, they swept the scene where the long green grass did wave Until they found the latest mound that was Con Carey’s grave

This fearless troop of volunteers marched through the church-yard gate With single aim it was their game Con’s corpse to decorate They lay him down in habit brown without a scratch or tear To shave his mien and make him clean for his trip to Peter’s chair Yes, to shave his mien and to make him clean so that he’d be no disgrace To Brosna gown of such great renown and to all the Irish race So that Peter and Paul and the good saints all might take poor Con in toe And that all cadavers from now on might be dressed before they go

Bury me dacent, Con once said to his comrades loyal and true See that I’m shod for the road to God since I’d do the same for you See that I’m dressed as good as the best but without a flounce or frill Then lay me down in Mountcollins town where I’ve plenty of time to kill When the deed was done, the guards came on and faced our gallant crew, “Out spoke the chief grave-digger saying what were we to do Could we look on and see poor Con in such a bad repose And send him straight to Heaven’s gate dressed up in dirty clothes.

(The twelve people who carried out the charitable task became known as the Twelve Apostles and John B’s son Billy said, “There was no Judas among those Twelve Apostles.”)

72 | FuneralTimes

A

new business was opening in Donegal Town and one of the owner’s friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, which said: “Rest in Peace.”

The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.

After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied: “Sir, I’m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this - somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying: “Congratulations on your new location!”

Whether speaking of ourselves or others the phrase “Pushing up the daisies” rolls off our tongue.

The term now as a literal meaning in the USA and it is likely to happen on this island.

Recompose is a very small team who are working hard towards opening their first location in Seattle in spring 2021. According to Anna Swenson, Communications Manager, their aim is to turn corpses into compost suitable for fertilising garden soil. Last May Washington State legalised the composting of human bodies. Gov. Jay Inslee signed legislation allowing the practice of “aboveground decomposition,” making Washington the first state in the USA - and likely the first place in the world, legal experts said - to explicitly allow human remains to become compost…

And Recompose will

manufacture composting pods in which the corpse will be placed. Wood chips and straw will be added and oxygen pumped in to accelerate decomposition.

After about one month the body will be composted ready to,” grow new life.” I don’t know if the “new life” is superior to what is produced by ordinary compost. But I do know that in my school days there was a profusion of Blackthorns and Prunus Spinosa (I’m showing off now) in Templeboden graveyard. And the sloes from them were more succulent and juicy than anything in the surrounding fields.

According to Recompose a human body will yield a cubic yard of compost.

One of the team says, “by allowing organic processes to

transform our bodies into a useful amendment we help to strengthen our relationship to the material cycles while enriching the Earth.”

The process involves placing unembalmed human remains wrapped in a shroud in a 5-foot-by-10-foot cylindrical vessel with a bed of organic material such as wood chips, alfalfa and straw,” NBC reports. “Air is then periodically pulled into the vessel, providing oxygen to accelerate microbial activity.

Within approximately one month, the remains are reduced to a cubic yard of compost.”

What are the chances of the powers that be on this island, north and south, taking a leaf out of Washington State’s book?

FuneralTimes | 73

New Delivery - Pierce Coachbuilders

Robert Gabriel from Gabriel and O’Donovan Funeral Directors, Bandon, Co. Cork taking delivery of their 2020 hearse from Pierce Coachbuilders

GerryWreath McDermott Manufacturer Circular Road, Roscommon

Mob: 086 2544126 or Mob: 086 8205215 74 | FuneralTimes

What do you say?

‘I’m never lost for words’, so says Mary Elizabeth Dillon from Civil Funerals Ireland, in response to the query, ‘what do you say at funeral services?’.

Sometimes the words flow easily, some people live very full and diverse lives which give rise to plenty of anecdotes, happy memories to share, and the telling of a lifestory going back many years. These are the easy funeral services to manage, organise and deliver. The problem here is keeping to the time frame allocated.

Mary Elizabeth has often had to ask people, when going to the crematorium, to curtail their remarks to fit the time available and, while being as sensitive as possible in doing so, nonetheless sometimes people feel upset or angry.

What people don’t realise, she says, is that a long speech is only remembered because it is long, whereas a short few words from the heart have more impact and last longer in the memory because they are poignant and personal.

It also happens that a family may decide that they do not want to speak themselves but will ask Mary Elizabeth to speak on their behalf.

Meeting with them in advance gives the opportunity to get an idea of what they want and more especially what they do not want. Where a relationship has broken down with a loved one, it is often not appropriate to use flowing words of tribute or to heap praise on the deceased.

Rather it is better to stick to the facts of a person’s life and to outline their biography.

In a case like this Mary Elizabeth often calls on her considerable file of poetry and words which she has put together over the years to find something appropriate which she or a family member can read. It is often in a case like this that families are particularly appreciative of the sensitive handling of their needs at a very difficult time.

For Mary Elizabeth, dealing with a difficult funeral and producing a fitting and appropriate service is one of the most fulfilling and satisfying elements of working in the funeral industry.

Civil funerals allow a great deal of scope for originality and being able to work in as wide a way as possible and this in turn allows the celebrant to offer so much to a grieving family.

By Mary Elizabeth Dillon

Civil Funerals Ireland Simple, unique, personal funeral services

• An alternative to the traditional • Celebrating Life • Reflecting the wishes and beliefs of the deceased and their loved ones • Provides an opportunity to pay a fitting tribute • Any suitable venue can be used

Mary Elizabeth Dillon is available between 9am - 11pm 7 days a week Tel ROI: 0402 91273 / Mobile: 087 957 4476 Email: info@civilfuneralsireland.com

Funerals conducted throughout Ireland

FuneralTimes | 75

DOSCARD.COM Detachable Order of Service Card The Doscard™ is fast becoming an integral part of all funeral services today.

The benefits to both the grieving families and the acting Funeral Directors are incomparable.

Be the first in your area to: Become a “Registered Doscard™ Funeral Director” today

To avail of our time limited 30 Day free trial visit:

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EU Registered Design Nos:006586137-0001 to 0002 NB: From 1st October 2014 Intentional Copying of an EU Registered Design is a Criminal Offence.

Forsey and Son opt for a greener future with Coleman Milne Hybrid I

nnovative Coleman Milne were the first UK ceremonial manufacturer to introduce CO2 reducing hybrid technology to their range and were delighted when Forsey and Son, including their sister company Trotman, invested in three hybrid Norwood Classic hearses and two coordinating hybrid Rosedale limousines. These imposing vehicles, finished in Tenorite Grey and upholstered in opulent black leather, feature expansive glass roofs, three bearer seats, wreath rails, illuminated signs and name badges to add a personal touch.

Fusing energy and efficiency, the Coleman Milne Ford based hybrid range sources power from both a battery driven electric motor and fuel engine. The smart technology effortlessly switches between the two powertrains or uses a combination of both. The high-voltage battery is recharged using the energy normally lost through friction breaking so there’s no need to stop and plug in.

Adrian Forsey commented: “We have long established an uncompromising high standard befitting to all our clients and renewing our fleet took careful consideration and research.

We were seeking a robust fleet that delivers premium styling with first rate performance.

Coleman Milne’s Stacey Moore arranged for us

to test three demonstration vehicles with diesel, petrol and hybrid drivetrains.

Being based in picturesque Somerset, we appreciate the obvious environmental benefits of the fuel-efficient Hybrid technology. With the sophisticated design and powerful but virtually silent drive, it became clear that the Norwood and Rosedale Hybrid collection was the ideal choice for our business. Placing the order was our highlight at the 2019 NFE exhibition.”

Family-run Forsey and Son operate over four branches located in Glastonbury, Somerton, Butleigh and Shepton Mallet. They remain an independent business and offering a highly personal, flexible and sympathetic service has been their ethos for over 70 years. These fundamental values have earned the company a solid reputation throughout the region.

FuneralTimes | 77

EULOGICA CLOUD Let us run your software, while you run your business D

o you wish to access Eulogica and other programmes with ease, wherever you are and from any kind of device? Would you rather not invest in servers or other complex infrastructure? With Eulogica Cloud, your computing can be both simple and secure!

Many funeral companies do not wish to operate their own computer server, as this comes with many costs and responsibilities – management, security, backup and more.

Eulogica offers a simple and affordable alternative – we can move your data and software to our Cloud servers, where we will look after it every day.

All of the usual Eulogica benefits are available – your business can still have its own Eulogica configuration in line with our principle that «every Funeral Director is unique». Not only Eulogica, but also other programmes and data can be gathered in one place and made easily accessible through a single login.

With Eulogica Cloud, you can access Eulogica and your other programmes from a wide range of devices, using our website or an app. You can use almost any type of computer, tablet or smartphone – regardless if it runs Windows, Mac OS, iOS or Android.

With Eulogica Cloud, there is no need to worry about investments in infrastructure, or the limitations of servers or networks. The number of users can be scaled up or down on short notice – we will provide computing power as required.

If you wish, it is also possible to use other programmes as part of our Eulogica Cloud solution - for example MS Office, accounting programmes etc. This means that you get the opportunity for a comprehensive solution for your software needs.

78 | FuneralTimes

Here is a summary of the benefits with using Eulogica Cloud; • Access to Eulogica from any computer, tablet or smartphone • Any other software can also be hosted (depending on selected Cloud option) • Backup, security and updates taken care of • No need for a server or other complex equipment • One point of contact for support To get started - please, call us at 0845 3519 935 or send an email to enquiries@eulogica. com

Classifieds... Classifieds...

For Sale 2005 VAUXHALL SIGNUM ELITE AUTO HEARSE

Scottish Repatriation Service Any time, any place, anywhere, day or night!

Specialising in and out of Scotland & Ireland, call now for a competitive quote on:

T: 01294 552213/273939

5 door, 2.2 petrol, 45,000 miles, Excellent condition - one owner, Fully serviced and Full MOT. Price £13,000

For more information contact Wesley on T: 07739 264347

For Sale 1998 FORD SCORPIO HEARSE

Family Run Funeral Directors PART OF THE BENNETTS GROUP

• All paperwork and third party fees arranged • One to one personal service • Silver Funeral Fleet available for Hire

For Sale 2017 KIA OPTIMA ESTATE

Quinn built, Petrol. Automatic, Double deck, Very good condition.

48,000 miles. Price on application

Removal Vehicle, 9,200 miles Immaculate condition inside and out

For more information contact Des on T: 086 3411814

For more information contact T: 086 8268876

email your advert to: sales@funeraltimes.com FuneralTimes | 79

Classifieds... Classifieds...

For Sale 2009 MERCEDES E220CDI DIESEL

Duffy built from new, Auto, Black MB leather, 60k Miles, Full Irish MOT. £25,000 (€27,500) ono

For more information contact T: (00353) 1855 0555

Frank Keogh & Sons Funeral Repatriation Services

Woodbrook, Bray Co.Wicklow Telephone:

ROI - 086 8440208 NI - 00353 86 8440208

For Sale 2011 FORD MONDEO HEARSETTE

65,000 miles. Price on request

For further information please contact: Richard on Tel. 087 2847932

email your advert to: sales@funeraltimes.com 80 | FuneralTimes

Classifieds... Classifieds...

For Sale WILCOX DAIMLER 2000 HEARSE AND 1997 LIMOUSINE

Both MOTd & PSVd. Very clean and regular use. Will split. Plates not for sale. Fleet Change. £9750 ono

For more information contact Ronnie on T:07836 343204

CUNNINGHAM M E M OR IA L S

Matthew L. Jones FUNERAL REPATRIATION SERVICE • South Wales based • 24 Hour removal & repatriation service • Long & short distance throughout UK & Ireland • Inclusive of airports & ferry ports • B.I.E qualified embalming service • Also Hearse & Limousine hire available

Mobile: 07815 866 652 Tel: 01267 236 787 (24hrs) email: info@funeralservices.wales www.funeralservices.wales

For Sale 2003 MERCEDES HEARSE

• New Memorials • Renovations • Inscriptions

07714 268116 ccunninghammemorials @hotmail.co.uk

Byrne Built, Petrol, Automatic, Excellent Condition, 56,000 Miles, Full Year NCT

For more information contact Colm on T: 087 2441213

email your advert to: sales@funeraltimes.com FuneralTimes | 81

Classifieds... Classifieds...

PATRICK RYAN & DAUGHTER FUNERAL DIRECTORS

Quality Personalised Memorial Products • Memorial Cards • Wallet Cards (Card or Plastic) • Bookmarks • Acknowledgement Cards • Mass/Order of Service Booklets

SPECIALISING IN REPATRIATION TO ALL PARTS OF IRELAND

TEL: 020 8567 1664 FAX: 020 8566 4795 6 South Ealing Road, London W5 4QA Email: office@pryanfunerals.com Website: PATRICK-RYAN.CO.UK

For more information contact UK 028/ROI 048 3835 5060 E: production@inhousepublications.com or see what our customers think www.memorial-printing.com/testimonials

COVERING LONDON AND THE HOME COUNTIES

• Provincewide service available • Experienced Drivers

JBFS

MERCEDES LIMOUSINES MERCEDES S CLASS MERCEDES MPV MERCEDES HEARSE AVAILABLE For enquiries please contact James on

Mob: 077 3428 3181/ Tel: 028 3884 9151 or visit: www.jamesbartonfuneralservices.co.uk or email: jamesbarton75@gmail.com

email your advert to: sales@funeraltimes.com 82 | FuneralTimes

EXPLOIT THE LOW

£ £ £ POUND £££ Jaguar XF Hearse 5 Door UK price £102,458 (plus vat) The pound has never been so low!

Jaguar XF Hearse 3 Door UK price £93,850 (plus vat) Order now before the rate rises!

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