Freedom Sisters Magazine | Her Service Matters | May 2021

MAY 2021 • VOL . 1 • ISSUE 5

•AMPLIFY WOMEN VETERANS•

•MAGAZINE•

To grieve much is to love much

Art Heals War Wounds One MotHER's grief journey

Ways to show you love her.

BE ALL YOU CAN BE FEMALE MARINE LEAVES LASTING LEGACY

FreedomSisters Magazine

May2021 | Vol. 1 | Issue 5 Publisher Freedom Sisters Media, LLC

EditHER-in-Chief Managing EditHER Contributing WritHERs HER Life MentHERship HERstory FoundHER LeadHER HER Next Mission Woman Warrior

HighlightHER SHEro Activation Cover Photographer

Click to Subscribe Letters to the Editor Marketing Opportunities

Kerri Jeter E.V. Moore

Naviere Walkewicz | Aaliyah Al-Mahdi | Brie Burgett Jennifer Rodriguez | Carrie Hammer | Jacqueline Zappey Amy Forsythe | Diali Coll-Mercado Kerri Jeter Kerri Jeter Laura Jones | Joanna Sweatt Kerri Jeter | Elis Salamone | Andrea Rathbun Amber Valencia | Jessica Morel Dana Richmond | Jennifer Ballou E.V. Moore Kerri Jeter Peter Paullin

inside Magazine or App editHERs@freedomsisters.com info@freedomsisters.com

Copyright | 2020-2021 | Freedom Sisters Media LLC Freedom Sisters Media respects the rights of all writeHERs, Photographers, Artists, and copyright holders. Consequently, all works that appear on this platform do so with the consent of the writeHER/s or the copyright holder. No image or information display on this site may be reproduced, transmitted, or copied without the express written permission of Freedom Sisters Media. Contravention is an infringement of the Copyright Act and its amendments and may be subject to legal action.

FreedomSisters, MentHERship, EditHER, SuperSHEro, highlightHER, WriteHER, FoundHER, LeadHER are trademarks of Kerri jeter.

CONTENTS

• AMPLIFY WOMEN VETERANS •

Happy and fit (not an oxymoron).

Paying Respect to the Sisters Who Have Served Before Us Volunteer Vacations—Explore and Change the World Be All You Can Be

Celebrate every stripe Five Practical Tips for Work-Life Balance (even with kids) Female Marine Leaves Lasting Legacy: Be Bold. Be Brief. Be Gone.

The Battle of Military MotHERhood FoundHER: Soldier to Scientist LeadHER: To grieve much is to love much.

Mindset—Your Ultimate Power Tool!

Dear Ruth Bader Ginsburg: Thank you!

The Enduring Campaign: InfluenceHER on a mission.

The Power of LinkedIn – Are You Clued In? Ditch the Booze: What are your reasons to be SobHER? Art Heals War Wounds: One MotHER’s grief journey Longing for peace Ways to show you love HER Freedom Sisters Slow Flow Yoga

• MAGAZINE•

In every issue: The EditHER's Note HighlightHER Be HER

LEADSISTER

MILITARY MOTHERHOOD MEDIA Military Reflecting on my military experiences bring me joy and honor. I believe in the ideals of the military and am so grateful for my opportunity to serve.

As vetHERan's we need to reflect on the skills and endurance the military provided, not every story is one of trauma, but every story of our sisterhood is grafted togetHER, we must stand shoulder to shoulder in love, support and determination for a greater force for tomorrow. #neveralone

MotHERhood Seriously, the hardest job on the planet is being a motHER. Yes, it is rewarding but it's also all about perseverance, determination and grit.

I haven't always gotten it right, but the one thing I know for certain is the love that fills my heart and soul for my humans is immeasurable and I want the world to see the gifts, talents and offerings my children bring to the world. #jetercrew

Media Did you know 82% of stories in the media are about men?

Did you know only 2% of the media are also veterans?

The market is not over saturated with vetHERan stories, we are the only media company with a podcast, magazine and live events exclusively with content for women VetHERans. OtHERs can get great value from our content, btut we put women first here. Each month we bring you the content you need to thrive in and out of the uniform. #VetHERansROCK

FOR THE LOVE OF OUR CHILDREN AND COUNTRY. Loyalty Day kicks off our Nation's month-long celebration of military appreciation. It is a day set aside for the reaffirmation of loyalty to the United States, and to reflect on the proud heritage of our American freedom.

We roll into MotHER's Day, a day set apart to honor mom. Over 70% of VetHERans are motHERs and this month we have a great podcast series that showcases five motHER/daughter duos, tune in each Monday. We also tell an incredible story about FoundHER, Dr. Trill Paullin, who discovered allergies in her breastmilk that were causing illness in her daughters. She is on a scientific mission coupled with her military tenacity to help moms around the world solve the allergen issue in motHER's milk.

As we continue into warmer days, I can't help but feel deeper love in my heart for the ones who paid the ultimate sacrifice, Memorial Day is often the unofficial kick-off to summer but for us in the military community, it's a day to remember the fallen. We sit down with Bonnie Carroll the leadHER of Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors, an organization that comes alongside bereaved families to love, grieve and heal togetHER.

HER Life

BY: NAVIERE WALKEWICZ

HAPPY AND FIT Not an oxymoron Often as women, okay let’s be honest, as super women we have mastered the art of juggling time: kids need me to be in two places at the same time; cool, I can figure it out. Work needs this done during my vacation week; no problem, I’ll slide vacation to my back-up week. I need to take time to feel happy and successful for me; great, I’ll just squeeze a workout in then. WAIT.

That can’t be right...can exercise and happy time for me co-exist?

Michelle Segar, author and director of the University of Michigan’s Sport, Health, and Activity Research and Policy Center, conducted a study from both active and inactive women between the ages of 22 and 49. Segar sought to find what makes them feel happy and successful.

An interesting find was that all of the women—whether they were regular exercisers or not—turned out to want the same things out of life:

to have meaningful

connections with others, to feel relaxed and free of pressure during their leisure time and to accomplish the goals they’d set for themselves, whether in their personal lives, their careers or simply their daily to-do lists.

You've got this, sis!

The difference she discovered was that

On your to-do list to lose weight but don’t

the women who were inactive viewed

have the will to begin? Grab a friend to

exercise as counterproductive to those

help hold you accountable and set a time

things.

you are going to hit a class together-boom, two checks done on the list--starting

But, happiness and success can co-exist

to lose weight and connecting with your

with exercise and it doesn't have to be a

friend. Here’s a class you could do together

zero-sum game. Ready to explore with me?

right in the comfort of your home!

Let’s FEAR (face everything and rise) together and try.

Another idea is to explore your feelings of 1. Explore your relationship with exercise.

happiness and success. If the idea of

Take a trip down memory lane and think

working out stresses you (when it’s

about how you define exercise. What

supposed to help you relax), consider what

was your barrier to doing it?

things you find relaxing and see what you

2. Be open to redefining “exercise.” Once

can actively do in concert. If you love to

you recognize the barrier, explore what

read perhaps consider downloading an

it could be and how you might weave it

audio book and incorporate some yoga

into meaningful connections, feeling

poses or stretching during the time you

relaxed, tackling to-do lists and

listen. If you enjoy watching some tv shows,

accomplishing goals.

perhaps consider incorporating some core work -- planks, crunches, etc. during

One idea is to make exercise a social thing.

commercial breaks or ads.

You were going to have coffee with a friend? Great! Grab the coffees and head

It’s never too late to find your way to happy

outside and walk with them, sips and steps

in a healthy body. You got this Sis!

sound pretty great.

PAYING RESPECT TO OUR SISTERS WHO SERVED BEFORE US

By: Aalyiah Al-Mahadi

Clearly, women have served their country for a long time, but unfortunately memorials honoring female veterans don’t get as much press as they should. That is until now.

Read on and take notes of some of the largest memorials and historical organizations that honor women veterans, and make plans to visit one (or more) of them.

The National Women’s History Museum has virtual exhibits on well-known women in history, as well as a resource library and archives on women’s roles in the military, STEM, media and other industries.

The Women in Military Service for America Memorial is dedicated not just to women of the Second World War but to all women who served in the U.S. armed forces up to the present.

I

n honor of Memorial Day, visit memorial sites and organizations around the nation and world that honor the fallen. History tells us that women have found ways onto the battlefield for centuries.

Looking as far back as the Revolutionary War, when women served as nurses and later when an estimated 400 women disguised as men fought in the Civil War. Women had a massive impact on the World Wars with 20,000 women joining the U.S. Army Nurse Corps in World War I and 400,000 women serving in World War II.

The memorial is located at the western end of Memorial Avenue at the entrance to Arlington National Cemetery in Arlington County, Virginia.

This memorial offers a chance for visitors to not only honor the fallen, but also learn about women in the U.S. armed forces, the role they played, and quotes about and from women veterans, as well as names and pictures.

There are numerous displays, a theater, and auditorium that shows films documenting the roles women have played in the armed forces.

Daughters of the American Revolution is an organization run by women who are directly descended from a person involved in the United States' efforts towards independence.

This non-profit group promotes education and patriotism, and they have a rich library, museum, online exhibitions, and archives that shine a spotlight on women’s role in our nation’s history.

Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington, D.C. honors those who served in the Vietnam War. In addition to the black granite memorial wall, there’s also a Vietnam Women’s Memorial on site.

If you’re stationed overseas, or are otherwise able to travel internationally, there are a number of places to visit.

If you’re in the UK, remember the women who served in World War II by visiting the Monument to the Women of World War II, located in Whitehall in London. The monument is the first and only one of its kind in the United Kingdom.

The Violette Szabo GC Museum is located in Herefordshire, England. The museum honors Violette Szabo, a Special Operations Executive agent who served during the Second World War. There’s also a bronze bust of Violette at the Albert Embankment of the River Thames. Other plaques and memorials with her name are located in France.

If you can’t make it to the locations mentioned in this article, there are many books, online resources, and documentaries on women veterans, just do an online search and find something that piques your interest.

Also, check out Women Vets USA, a web directory of women veterans organizations and sites throughout the U.S.

VOLUNTEER By: Brie Burgett “Be the change you wish to see in the world” -Mahatma Gandhi

There never seem to be enough vacation days per year to explore all of the incredible destinations that are constantly coming across our screens—from beautifully curated travel Instagram feeds to Discover TV shows in remote corners of the world. That compounded with all of the other things competing for our time, makes those limited days off even more valuable.

The concept is simple and brilliant— maximize time off to make a difference while still having incredible experiences around the world.

Good intentions to give back in local communities and lend a helping hand often get postponed due to the neverending to-do lists demanding our attention. What if there was a way to combine several of these interests into a single trip?

If visiting Machu Picchu in Peru is one of your bucket list trips, why not help build a school in the community before trekking up to see the ancient ruins?

Traveling to see a new corner of the world, doing something that you love, while also making a positive impact may seem too good to be true, but in recent years there has been a growing trend for volunteer vacations.

Everyone has different strengths, interests, serving styles and dream destinations. The good news is that there are just as many opportunities to match!

Or if a safari in Africa is what you have dreamt of for years, perhaps helping to feed and care for some of the rescue cats is better suited to you.

The options are endless but here are three different opportunities to spark some ideas of what is available.

Work with underprivileged children in Peru- have a purpose-driven trip to care for at-risk and impoverished children through a childcare and development project in Cusco, Peru.

Contribute to building a safe and happy environment for the more vulnerable children by helping with their education, leading activities, teaching new skills or practicing English to help them learn and grow!

Big cats rescue in South Africa— calling all animal lovers!

Ethical wildlife volunteers help to care for lions, tigers and other big cats rescued from traffickers that were brought up in captive environments and are not able to be released back into the wild.

This is a unique opportunity to have direct interaction with these magnificent animals by assisting with their care through feeding and exercising as well as improving the facilities through helping with tasks around the sanctuary.

Hands on in Nepal- for those whose serving style is action-oriented and who are eager to lend a helping hand, assist with rebuilding areas in Nepal that were impacted by the earthquake.

At the end of the trip, you will see the tangible results of your labor and build relationships by working side by side with the local community.

Help with renovation and maintenance projects in schools and other facilities at one of the International Volunteer project locations in Kathmandu, Chitwan, Chitlang or Pokhara.

If these three projects do not ignite interest or compliment your passions, check out other options which range from women’s education, teaching English, sustainable agriculture, construction and renovation, special needs care, etc.

Many of the short-term volunteer projects from reputable organizations have some fees associated to help cover the room and board so that all money raised goes directly back into the project. These fees typically cost between $200-650 per week.

For anyone that is interested in longer-term projects and has more time available to dedicate to a cause, there are more possibilities for volunteering at no cost or to even receive a small stipend including the Peace Corps, United Nations Volunteers, or Volunteer Service Overseas.

Before finalizing the details, be sure to do some research to avoid some of the negative aspects of “voluntourism” to ensure that the organization is reputable and focused on giving back in a positive forum. Love Volunteers, Go Eco and Volunteer HQ are just a few of the many positive organizations.

For all big-hearted travel lovers, challenge yourself to dedicate a few of those precious days off to make a positive impact by volunteering overseas and having experiences that you will look back on with pride!

BE ALL YOU CAN BE By: Jennifer Rodriguez

When I joined the military, I didn’t know what to expect. I was nervous yet excited to begin what I knew would be at least a 20-year career in the military. I joined the Army in 2002, but it wasn’t until I arrived at Fort Bragg, North Carolina in 2007 that I made my first female friends that continue to last me through the years.

I grew up as a tomboy and didn’t have many female friends; this continued when I first joined the service. When I arrived at my new unit at Fort Bragg, I was welcomed by three females who took me in and never let me go. I was married motHER with a one-year-old and was pregnant with number two.

These “girls” (we seemed so young at the time) were my rock. No matter what I was going through, they were there for me. In this time, I learned the power of having female friends and wished I had started this sooner!

I realized that by having my own little support group I was more successful than I had ever been before. I no longer had to be an “Army of one”. These girls supported me no matter what the situation was, they were honest with me when I was wrong, but they were always there for me to help me and push me along the way.

With their support, I was able to take and pass an Army Physical Fitness Test two months after giving birth to my second son, in order to submit my ROTC packet and was selected for a ROTC scholarship.

After graduating and receiving my commission, I was again welcomed into an awesome group of females while attending the Basic Officer Leadership Course at Fort Jackson, South Carolina.

All of these ladies have been there for me through a divorce, single motHERhood, multiple duty changes, various jobs and just recently the passing of my mother.

They have supported through thick and thin. They have encouraged me to Be All I Can Be and continue to do so today.

I also have the honor of knowing a few strong female leaders that I look up to and aspire to be like. I admire their strong personalities, achieved great military success and held positions most women do not.

Finance is a small branch, so to have a female Airborne Corps G8 (budget), a female Airborne Division G8 and a female United States Army Special Operations Command (USASOC) Comptroller (also budget) is extremely motivating and inspiring.

I continue to learn from these leaders every day, not only on a professional level but on a personal level.

Along with my female support groups, these women have shown me that I can do this, I can continue to Be All I Can Be and make it to positions that I previously thought were unattainable.

M E N T

Her

S H I P

Lt . Col. Karma A. Miller As an active duty Army officer with over 18 years of service, I often look back over my experiences and ask myself, what do I know now that I wish I knew as a young Lieutenant and Captain. In other words, what would I tell my former self?

So when posed with the question, what would you tell a young woman wanting to join the military or to continue in the military, this fits right into that. There are three specific things I would have benefited from hearing.

Do it for yourself. The military can be very rewarding. There are Although you are the majority, the force needs what you have to offer. The military needs to hear you points of view in order to foster a more inclusive and diverse force.

So be confident. Be bold. Take your seat at the table and own it because you are valuable and deserve to be there Do it for the military! The Armed Services need you! We need a force that is reflective of our nation.

A force that is reflective of its nation (gender, ethnicity, religion, etc…) will be a best received. We need your perspective.

We need your ingenuity. We need your innovation.

Do it for other women! Women throughout the military ranks and in the civilian world need to see you. Female Soldiers need the encouragement of other female Soldiers and the examples of excellence and success. The women within the ranks of the Armed Forces need your diversity and leadership.

- LTC Karma A. Miller 82nd Airborne Division Comptroller “America’s Guard to Honor”

Col. Rebecca McElwain I see many parallels between serving in the military as an Army Finance & Comptroller and serving in the military as a female. Both are small in numbers, both require some translation regarding the unique capacity each brings to the fight, and both strive to obtain an equal seat at the table with cohorts.

Regardless of rank and vocation, I would encourage current and future women in our military to take a seat at the table. Taking a seat at the table, is both figurative and literal. Figuratively, we take our seat at the table by creating value in an organization, reinforcing behaviors that establish trust, and generating credibility through our competent actions. Literally, we take our seat at the table by being present and generating positive partnerships with others.

Doors have opened for women in combat arms and specialized military training to include the Army Ranger School and Special Forces Assessment & Selection. Standardize scores for Combat Fitness Tests are making their way across the force.

Less than 1.5M, or .5% of the US population serve in the active duty military, of that, a little over 15% or roughly 225,000 are women.

The military has made great strides in creating a single standard for the force.

Now, more than ever, women in the armed forces must take their seat at the table, live up to the legacy before them, and reinforce a single standard for all who serve. Taking a seat at the table is not easy.

It requires treating every job as though it is the most important you’ve ever had, tackling tasks with vigor and professionalism, helping to carry a load even when it is not yours to carry, genuinely working hard towards the success of others, knowing your profession, generating credibility, earning trust, and making sacrifices for the greater good of mission accomplishment.

-COL Rebecca B. McElwain Assistant Chief of Staff, G8 Comptroller XVIII Airborne Corps

Celebrate Every Stripe

By: Carrie Hammer

As women, we often don’t celebrate the achievements we accomplish. Perhaps it is because we don’t see accomplishments as achievements.

We see them as something we did, a task that needed to be done or something broke that needed to be fixed. Only to pause and celebrate when someone else wanted to recognize our achievements.

During my time as a first sergeant I was called into my chief’s office, he asked me this question, “when we promote someone to senior master sergeant, is it important that an airman have their family present?”

My immediate response was, “yes, this could very well be the individual’s last promotion.”

Achieving this rank is a significant achievement. Only two percent of Airmen will achieve this rank. This conversation served as notice that I would be the person being promoted and I should plan on my family coming to the promotion ceremony.

Although the last promotion I would have in my career, it would be my first promotion ceremony and celebration.

During your career remember to celebrate your promotions and achievements.

I quickly learned the first step to celebrating was to be ready for it. If we are ready, we can launch into celebration wholeheartedly when the opportunity presents and the more we celebrate the better prepared we are to do it each new milestone we achieve.

The second step is remembrance of the experiences you had while in that role, rank or position. When we celebrate the beginning of a new year, we are acknowledging the end and the beginning, recognizing and sometimes reflecting on the difficult, the great, and the stuff in the middle that we experienced during that time.

I believe we bring the same energy to our lived experiences in celebrating military promotions. Sure, there were difficult things that happened between “the stripes'' and it's good to accept and be grateful for those experiences.

We all celebrate differently, based on culture, family dynamics, personality, religion and so on. Celebration can be as minor as sitting in silence feeling what you feel about your accomplishment or simply journaling, buying yourself flowers or it can be taking yourself and a friend out for coffee, she wants to celebrate you as well.

There are big celebrations as well, like promotion ceremonies hosted by the unit—eat cake and be merry!

Master Sergeant Carrie Hammer being promoted to Senior Master Sergeant, with diamond (First Sergeant) by her two boys during her “Tacking on” Ceremony in 2013.

Whether it is your first promotion, or you finally have entered the non-commissioned officer corp or you are at the top of the promotion chart, each rank deserves a celebration!

IDuring a deployment promotion ceremony speech a wise chief said “remember every stripe”. Recall the good moments and you rose to the challenges. Don’t forget the difficult moments, how you rose above adversity to be who you are today. Also, recount the day-today monotony as you reflect on perseverance and success.

They all count and we carry them with us as we continue to grow as LeadHERs. Take time today to celebrate yourself. Write a list of all your promotions, the new leadHERships skills you learned at each level and how you celebrated your success. If you didn’t celebrate well along the way, celebrate now for all the effort it took to achieve different ranks.

Celebration brings remembrance, and remembering your stripes helps you to remember what it was like to be lower enlisted or a brand new officer, which allows you to mentor those who are there now and prepare them for the future.

By: Jacqueline Zappey

Five Practical Tips for Work Life Balance —Even With Kids

Wake up. Get kids ready for the day. Get yourself ready. Kiddo one needs cupcakes for the class party and kid two can’t find their shoes for the thousandth time. Didn’t we just look for these yesterday morning? Drop kids off at daycare/school. Get coffee and breakfast. Get to work. Work all day.

Complete morning routine in reverse order for the afternoon. Work on neverending to-do list. Sound familiar?

The perfect work life balance can be hard to achieve; but it’s not impossible!

Our household is a dual-veteran home with five kids. My husband, Jake and I, are full-time teachers without local family support. It is quite the juggling act to make our household run smoothly and keep things in order.

Here are five veteran-tested and kid-approved tips that can make a difference in your home too.

Have open communication with your family.

Communication is crucial for family success. Every household member needs to provide information about important deadlines or events so nothing gets missed and can be planned out in advance. This helps eliminate schedule conflicts such as work deadlines, birthday parties, and valuable family time. Make sure to add these events to a calendar.

Yes, a calendar is a key tip for scheduling.

Wall calendars have been our go-to for years.

We have one centrally located in our kitchen, where all appointments or activities get added to regularly. This helps prevent overlaps in our schedules and helps eliminate the possibility of forgetting where someone needs to be and when. Disclaimer: That still happens from time to time when we forget to look at our calendar, so make sure you refer back to it daily. We recently discovered a shared calendar app. Cozi allows individual entries by all users and everyone’s calendars automatically are synced. Cozi, even allows up-to-the-minute shopping lists to be generated across users.

Set boundaries—prioritize your time.

Set family boundaries and decide which items will take up your calendar space each week and stick to it. Do not allow yourself to add on more because you feel you “have to”. Prioritizing time allows you to re-energize and take time for yourself and your family. This weekend your family has a bridal shower and 2 birthday parties. There will always be events to attend. As much as you want to be there for all of them, you simply cannot. You will stretch yourself thin and wear yourself out.

Don’t bring work home.

This one sounds so simple, yet it is so hard to do. When you are at work, work hard! The more time you spend scrolling on social media, taking breaks or chatting with friends the less time you are using to complete work.

Leave work at work ensures that by the time you get home you can relax and focus on family time.

Use this motto to help you stay present: Wherever you are, be all there.

Establish and protect family time Time is fleeting; be intentional with it. Set an hour of no tech time once a week.

All devices go off and away. One important way our family connects nightly is during dinner. We each take turns sharing a peak and pit. Your peak should be one thing that went well and your pit is one thing that did not go well that day. The only rule is that it cannot be a pit about someone at the table. For example, one of our boys can’t tattle on another boy for their pit. Other family favorites are board games, movie nights and reading together, an hour or two is sufficient as long as it is intentional.

Quality over quantity.

Implementing these five practical tips are crucial to protect your family boundaries and your time.

Do you feel up to trying these tips out for the next month? If so, we would love to know how it goes.

HERstory

E L A M EF

L E YCAG

G

M

V E SL A E L AS E N T I IN R A

BE BOLD.

BE BREIF. By: Amy Forsythe

It’s been almost 15 years since the death of U.S. Marine Maj. Megan M. McClung but her legacy continues to grow with every year since her passing in 2006.

McClung was the first female Marine officer to be killed in Operation Iraqi Freedom, as well as the first female graduate of the United States Naval Academy to be killed in action since the school was founded in 1845.

McClung who was 34 at the time of her death, was serving as a media relations officer when a roadside bomb killed her instantly in Ramadi, Iraq, Dec. 6, 2006. She and two other service members assigned the Army’s Brigade Combat Team, Capt. Travis Patriquin and Spec. Vincent Pomante, III, were also killed.

The vehicle convoy McClung had been riding in was escorting Newsweek journalists when an improvised explosive device struck their vehicle. The Newsweek journalists were in another vehicle and escaped without injury. McClung had been escorting retired Marine Lt. Col. Oliver North and a Fox News Channel camera crew earlier in the day and were devastated when they learned the news of the attack.

McClung and I were serving on the same small forward-deployed public affairs team for all of 2006 with a Camp Pendleton-based unit. We had served together a decade earlier and crossed paths during the years. I was excited to work with her again because her energy and passion for media engagements and telling the Marine Corps story was unparalleled.

Maj. Megan McClung KIA Dec. 6, 2006 First Female Marine Officer and First Female U.S. Naval Academy Graduate to be killed during Operation Iraqi Freedom.

“As I get older, her death resonates more than I thought it would after so many years. We are all moving on with our lives. I am married, with children, successful in my work and life and I know she would be proud, but the thought that she won't have these things is heartbreaking. Her memory is suspended in time,” reflected Master Sgt. Lynn Kinney, who served with McClung and was a corporal at the time of our deployment.

Kinney also added that it’s been hard to watch events unfolding in Ramadi this year. “The recent news of the taking of Ramadi by ISIL has been hard to process. It makes me sad and angry to have lost so many lives, not just Megan, but the amazing potential of so many Marines whose lives were cut short.”

McClung had come from a family of military service and was commissioned as a Marine officer in 1995 and served nearly 10 years on active duty at various stateside locations. She remained in the Marine Corps reserves and was hired by Kellogg, Brown and Root, an American engineering and construction company, and served in Baghdad, Iraq as a private contractor in 2005.

When she returned to the U.S. in 2005, she was mobilized to active duty with the Marines, where she would deploy back to Iraq, and not return home.

Retired Master Sgt. Willie Ellerbrock, who worked closely with McClung during their deployment, expressed how he honors her legacy. “I truly believe the best way to honor our fallen is to remember them and defend these liberties with all of our might and ability, as they did for us. Love deeply and live greatly—for them and yourselves.”

Master Sgt. Willie Ellerbrock pays his final respects at Maj. Megan McClung’s memorial service at Camp Fallujah’s Chapel of Hope Dec. 13, 2006.

CAMP FALLUJAH, Iraq - Lynn Kinney (left), Megan McClung (center) and Amy Forsythe (right) served together during their deployment to Camp Fallujah, Iraq in 2006.

They were assigned to the Camp Pendleton-based I Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward) Public Affairs Office. This photo was taken at Camp Fallujah in April 2006.

Former colleague and classmate from their time at the Defense Information School, Col. Riccoh Player wrote in an email, “Megan served with the mindset of running to the sound of battle, not away from it. She accepted every mission, every billet, every challenge with vigor, creative abandon and a find-a-way-to-make-a-way ethos.”

Player, the I MEF deputy PAO during the 2006 deployment, had known McClung for many years and was crushed upon learning the news of her death that day from the director of public affairs for I MEF, Lt. Col. Bryan Salas.

Salas, who retired as a colonel a few years ago, now works as the Deputy Chief of Staff for the Customer Service and Public Engagement Directorate at U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services for the Department of Homeland Security.

Salas had also known and worked with McClung at various times during their careers and had recruited her to deploy with him and the I MEF (Forward) team as the Media Relations Officer in Anbar Province. Little did he know, or could have imagined, that a member of his team would fall victim to the violence that was mounting in the region.

“We all missed her very much. She was a great professional colleague and friend. She was a great running partner. She led us with great encouragement in running and fitness. Megan was an unforgettable personality and I miss her tremendously,” Salas wrote in an email for this article.

As the first female Marine officer to be killed in Iraq, many senior officials and media took notice because this crossed into new territory for women who were now sharing the same burden and risk as male Marines.

Those serving on Female Engagement Teams mounted patrols outside the wire and other various missions were no less at risk than their male counterparts.

When asked if this changed the way people should feel about women serving in a combat zone, the senior enlisted leader for I MEF Public Affairs Officer explained his position.

“No…but serving with Megan and women like her in Iraq, confirmed what I had already experienced in non-combat-related deployments and exercises. Namely, that honor, courage and commitment are not gender-specific attributes,” said Master Gunnery Sgt. John Cordero.

Of all the hundreds of service members who had been killed during that year alone, almost everyone there at the time worked with someone or knew someone personally who had been killed or severely injured.

According to globalsecurity.org, 119 service members lost their lives in the month of December 2006, which was the height of the violence centered in the Sunni Triangle.

Although her death came as a surprise to all who knew her, the other two who lost their lives were serving vital roles for then U.S. Army Col. Sean McFarland’s staff of the 1st Brigade of the 1st Armored Division, or "Ready First" based at Camp Ramadi.

Patriquin, a young Special Forces officer, had already won a Bronze Star in Afghanistan before being transferred to Iraq. Patriquin set out to establish a crucial network with tribal leaders built on mutual trust and respect.

In 2006, Patriquin is largely credited with enabling the Sunni Awakening in early August where the influential sheiks of Anbar Province revolted against Al Qaeda insurgents.

This movement spread through Anbar and eventually across the country—a turning point that led to dramatically lower levels of violence starting in mid-2007.

Before his tragic death from an IED explosion, Patriquin was so beloved by Iraqis that they adopted him into their tribes and loved him as a brother.

A book was written about him by author William Doyle called A Soldier's Dream. It’s a tribute to a man who loved Iraq and a devoted soldier who made a crucial impact on the Iraq War. The gunner in the vehicle, Pomante, 22, from Westerville, Ohio, was responsible for shepherding visitors to and from the flight line and planning the routes to important meetings at the Ramadi government center.

Although McClung, Patriquin and Pomante came from different backgrounds, they died side-by-side doing what they loved and defending the ideals of our nation.

The perpetrators of the attack were never caught or brought to justice. Their deaths rippled across so many circles of families, friends and colleagues that are still trying to accept the tragedy.

Fellow female Marine officer and public affairs colleague, Jill Leyden, was a 2nd lieutenant when she served with McClung in Iraq. “It's difficult to describe how I changed. The best I can say is that there is a level of seriousness that I have not been able to shake off despite my best efforts.”

McClung’s bright red hair and larger-than-life personality left a mark on so many that knew her. As an avid runner and triathlete, she was well known throughout the Marines’ triathlon community.

As a triathlete, she competed in seven Ironman distance triathlons. Her accomplishments include winning the First Military Female award in Kona, Hawaii, in 2000 and placing second the next year.

McClung organized the first Marine Corps Marathon (Forward) in Iraq to coincide with the 2006 Marine Corps Marathon in October and served as the race director just weeks before her death. Despite running with an injury, she placed second among the female runners.

McClung’s older brother, Michael, says that her death changed her family in ways they never expected.

“The war impacted my life. It was the reason Megan was overseas and the direct cause she would not return. It changed the dynamic of my family, of my parents, and of how the rest of my life would be. Now, years later, I understand that grief changes shape, but never goes away.”

Childhood friends, classmates from the Naval Academy, members of the media and Marines who knew her reached out to the McClung family in several ways when news of her death was made known.

The McClung family makes it a point to attend the Marine Corps Marathon in Wash., D.C. every year to award the “Penguin Award.”

McClung encouraged everyone to put forth his or her best effort and established the Penguin Award providing acknowledgment to the final runner that completed the 26.2 miles.

In continuing the tradition at the MCM and in McClung’s memory, the Paul the Penguin Award is presented to the final official MCM finisher each year.

The Penguin Award, an honor given to the final finisher of the marathon for their efforts for not quitting no matter what their time would be.

The Penguin Award first made its unofficial appearance at the Marine Corps Marathon Forward in Iraq in 2006, a race she organized while deployed.

“He really inspired [Meg],” said Re McClung, Megan’s mother. “So she asked for a penguin that she could give to the last official finisher.” John Bingham had the same life metaphor as Megan McClung. “It’s not important how fast you run it, it’s that you get to the goal, and you cross the finish line,” the article explained.

Other notable recognition included when retired Marine Lt. Gen. Carol Mutter honored McClung for her sacrifice during a speech at the Republican National Convention on Sept. 4, 2008.

The director of MCM, Rick Nealis, contacted the McClung family in 2007 and asked if they would come to the marathon and present a penguin to the last official runner.

In 2008, the first Major Megan M. McClung Memorial Scholarship was awarded to a college student by her parents, Drs. Re and Michael McClung and the Women Marines Association.

The McClung family has been presenting the Penguin Award for the last eight years and will continue to do so as a way to honor Megan’s memory. “As long as the McClung family is around and there are any of us to do it, we will be here to give the penguin to that last runner,” Re explained.

There have been several other memorials and honors paid to McClung since 2006. A Marine Corps-wide annual leadership award in her name seeks to highlight the achievements of an outstanding leader, role model and mentor.

The Sea Service Leadership Association sponsors the yearly award and it’s presented at the annual Joint Women’s Leadership Symposium in June.

In Iraq, U.S. Army Gen. Ray Odierno was responsible for building a state-of-the-art broadcast studio in 2007, which allowed live interviews as well as numerous press events.

He dedicated the studio to honor McClung’s tireless efforts while working in the public affairs field.

The Defense Information School began presenting the Maj. Megan McClung Leadership Award in 2011 to one graduating member of each Public Affairs Qualification Course.

The Marine Corps Combat Correspondents Association also created the Megan McClung Sport Photography annual merit award that recognizes excellence by combat correspondents and combat camera specialists.

More than 700 people attended her memorial service on a cold D.C. morning and Maj. Megan McClung was buried in Arlington National Cemetery in Section 60 with full military honors on Dec. 19, 2006.

Maj. Megan McClung is buried in Section 60 at Arlington National Cemetery. Amy Forsythe has visited Arlington, located in Wash., D.C., through the years to pay respects to Megan and the other service members who lay in honor there. Megan’s headstone is engraved with the words: “Be Bold. Be brief. Be Gone,” as an honor to her mantra she would often repeat when conducting media engagement training for senior officers.

McClung, who was unmarried at the time of her death, held a Bachelor of Science degree in General Science from the U.S. Naval Academy and had just completed her Masters in Criminal Justice from Boston University.

Her awards include the Bronze Star, Purple Heart, Navy and Marine Corps Commendation Medal and National Defense Service Medal.

One of her most lasting legacies was a phrase she coined while training troops and senior officials on how to conduct media interviews.

Her headstone is engraved with her mantra, fitting perhaps for someone whose life was short but lived so well: "Be Bold. Be Brief. Be Gone."

Amy Forsythe was an award-winning Combat Correspondent from 1993 to 2010 and served four combat tours. She earned a commission in the U.S. Navy and serves as a reserve public affairs officer.

By: Diali Coll-Mercado

Being a mother in the military was not always in the “plan”. Actually, being a mother was never in my plan at all.

Doctors had always advised me that I would probably never have children.

Well, they were wrong.

My career had always come first and I was very focused on my national guard career as well as civilian career.

During a leadership school in South Carolina, I discovered why I was not feeling so well. I think I cursed (a lot) at first, then I was speechless and then I cried for almost a month.

The National Guard provided me the option to get out of the Army under honorable conditions due to the pregnancy, if that was something I wanted.

Of course, a woman is non-deployable during her pregnancy, but she can remain in if that is what she so chooses.

But after a lot of discussion with the father of the child, whom I was not married to at the time, I made the decision to remain in the guard.

In July of 2020 the Senate finally passed the Mothers of Military Service Leave Act as part of the 2021 National Defense Authorization Act, which makes certain that women serving in the National Guard or Reserves can take maternity leave without worrying about how it will affect their creditable military service.

It would ensure pay and points for 12 pay periods, six drill weekends, toward retirements after pregnancy and childbirth.

In 2016, 13.1% of all women of childbearing potential in the active component of the U.S. Armed Forces had at least one pregnancyrelated event (+016). It’s hard.

You want to be a good Soldier, Sailor, Marine, Coastie, Airman and be a good mom, right?

Many times, I wondered if I was doing it right. Your kids will look up to you and see how hard you worked to provide for them and be very proud of you for serving your country.

When leaving your child behind for training, whether it be for a two-week training, a couple of months or longer is never easy as a mother. For me, it was one of the toughest things ever to do, to leave for a year and leave dad to handle it all.

Although I knew he could, that he had help, and in God's hands everything would be ok, it ate me up inside knowing I’d miss out on cuddles, reading new books each day, the first of (fill in the blank), recitals, kisses in the mornings and at night, walking hand-in-hand into school, the list goes on and on.

Amazingly, technology has progressed so much with a myriad of applications that families can now feel closer than ever before.

How can the military do it better for mothers? Or are they doing it right and some of us just don’t know about the resources? Are there outside organizations to help mothers who are struggling? If you’re not aware of any groups, ask your Chaplain to start one.

In the Army I would hear about “family first”, but I really did not find an outlet where other moms in my position could get together and discuss how we work through it.

We get our military job done—day in and day out. Most other soldiers of equal or higher rank at my battery were male. Coming across as vulnerable was not something I wanted.

Truth be told, I’m now out of the Army and still do not want to seem vulnerable, yet still find myself pretending to be tough when there are moments I just really need a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent because it really is hard raising children.

MotHERhood and Military service are both demanding, and we answer the call to serve with grace and grit as warriors.

Military service comes with regulations to help navigate our careers, but motHERhood is so beautifully different that a manual would never help us navigate the journey.

No matter what you choose to do as a military motHER, know that you are the right mom for the job - in and out of the uniform.

FoundHER

By: Kerri Jeter

The doctor’s words devastated Trill Paulin’s world. Her hopes and dreams for what the beginning of motHERhood was supposed to look like crumbled to dust.

The pain in her heart and in her breast were magnified. This was so cruel.

Several moments lapsed as she was burdened with mind numbing disappointment that followed the reality she had been the reason her rosycheeked infant was hurting. She felt helpless.

Was a mother’s desire to bond and feed her baby from her bosom a mistaken belief?

In the passing moments, she felt like there was little she could do. The countless hours of waking in the middle of the night, the scary reactions her baby had endured, the non-stop tears they both cried was all too much to carry.

But Trill knew that somehow, they would get through those days even with the relentless grief.

The first step was to hand her sick baby over to the doctor, knowing that for the next 24-hours, her six-week old infant would not eat.

How could mother nature be so cruel?

In that instant, motHERhood was going to be harder than any battle she faced in the military.

The next 24-hours stretched into what felt like decades.

Her precious baby would scream herself to sleep then awake and do it again.

Since Trill was literally the food, holding the baby made her even more upset, she would continuously root— then they both would cry.

“I felt so confused and terrified that I had somehow done something wrong and was harming my baby,” said Paulin.

“Breastfeeding my baby was what I always believe to be the best option. It was alarming that in my situation, it was in fact the worst thing for my child.”

HOW MANY WERE ALLE THEIR MOTHER’S BR

To add to the heartache, expressing milk in the room to maintain supply made it even worse. Trill found herself sitting in the hospital stairwell, pumping her poisonous milk and sobbing uncontrollably.

Even as a trained and seasoned Soldier in the U.S. Army, nothing had prepared her for the mental and physical battle she was fighting.

However, her need to selflessly serve others became crystal clear despite the despair she faced.

“I am in my 16th year of military service, a proud Idaho National Guardsmen,” said Paulin. “I had been to Iraq and nothing I saw there prepared me for this fight. But I knew I had the fight in me, and I would do whatever I could to protect my child and find the answers our family desperately needed.”

How many babies were allergic to their own mother’s breast milk?

How many mothers' dreams of breastfeeding were broken?

Where could moms turn to when the “what to expect when...” expectations vanished?

As a mother to two beautiful daughters who had severe infant food sensitivities. Left with only one option: quit breastfeeding. Trill started researching how to produce breast milk they could properly digest. Along the way, she discovered that many parents experience the same troubling situation.

“I knew I couldn’t be alone in this outcome. Fortunately, I was educated in science and was conducting in-depth research on breast cancer when this situation arose.

Y BABIES ERGIC TO R OWN REAST MILK?

I completely left all that I worked towards behind—I needed to use my education for the betterment of mothers across the globe,” said Trill. That is just what she did.

As a Molecular Biologist, she incorporated her skills, passion and energy to create a place for parents to find answers to their questions about infant food sensitivities and to empower them to continue their breastfeeding journey. And as a result Free to Feed™ was born.

Free to Feed™ creates science-based content for allergen-free breastfeeding and is developing products to empower parents through infant allergies.

They have patented their technology that allows mothers to analyze their breast milk for allergen proteins.

This endeavor is supported by Trill’s Ph.D. in Cellular and Molecular Biology from the University of South Florida, who also has a bachelor’s degree in Biology and Chemistry from Minot State University.

If your infant has severe allergies, Free to Feed™ helps moms understand breastfeeding better and how to relieve the stress and anxiety with allergy related concerns.

Paulin provides a wealth of knowledge on the elimination diet as well as other resources when breastfeeding is no longer an option.

Through education, inspiration and empowerment Free to Feed™ is helping parents reach their breastfeeding goals.

Freedom Strips are patented food allergen testing strips that can decipher the protein in the milk to which your baby may be allergic. Nothing else like this is under development for moms.

There has been some major moves for Free to Feed™ in the last year, including Paulin temporarily moving to New York City when Indie Bio, the world’s leading science accelerator accepted her company into their program.

“I'm ecstatic to get into the program and made the hard choice to New York. I had been a part of some other smaller accelerators that didn't include investment and were remote,that’s incredible, I knew that the most value from this would come from actually physically being here,” said Paulin. “I got out to New York in February 2021 to my lab space at Rockefeller University in Manhattan, which is exciting for all kinds of different reasons, but the lab space is impactful because it has literally everything that I need.”

Free to Feed™ provides one-on-one consultations for mom’s who want to know the best possible steps, pinpoint the culprit of the allergic reaction and make sure that the diet for each mom is sustainable long term so she can continue on the breastfeeding journey.

“In the middle of being really focused in the lab.

I was surprised to see a massive boom and our one-on-one parent consults,” explains Paulin. “I got to New York and I have been so crazy busy doing oneon-one parent consults, really highlighting an unmet need that I knew existed for myself, but I didn't know how worldwide that need was.”

On any given day, Paulin zooms around the world on video conference calls connecting with moms in countries like Canada, Kuwait, Australia and the United Kingdom to name a few.

“I am very well world traveled literally every single day. I'm in at least three different countries. Which is amazing on one level that, you know, like we're getting that kind of impact and spread and also it’s super sad on the other hand that so many parents are not getting support. It's a universal need.”

Many parents are told that there is no option except to quit breastfeeding when there are allergic reactions in their infant. So, a huge part of the growth for Free to Feed™ is to put mommy first and her desire to keep nursing the baby from a place of empathy backed with science to guide these families in their journey.

“Because of that mommy first model, we are expanding really quickly. So, I just hired a registered nurse fulltime to help me expand the consults because I can't keep up. I am booked anywhere from eight to 18 consults a day,” said Paulin.

“My hair is on fire while also trying to work in the labs. So bringing on a registered nurse who is also a food allergy mom who breastfed will be vital to our success.”

Dr. Paulin is on fire for sure, as she sprints forward to demo day, where Free to Feed™ will have the testing capabilities to be able to detect cow's milk protein and how it presents in human milk.

A SCIENTIST

BY CHOICE, A MOM

BY CHANCE AND AN ENTREPRENEUR

BY NECESSITY.

“By demo day I will at least be able to show investors that I can add breast milk to this and shake it up and if it turns a color it would indicate that we are detecting calcium protein, which will be the first of its kind.”

Cow’s milk protein is the most common infant food reaction through breast milk, upwards of 80% of infants who have reactivity through breast milk, react to milk protein, either by itself or with others.

Once Free to Feed™ navigates the way forward with their go-tomarket plan, they will continue the science to research their top four triggers for other allergens: protein, soy, wheat, and egg.

Then level up again to their top 12 list, which can be found on their website Free to Feed™ also has a food allergy and breastfeeding masterclass on all things breastfeeding and food allergy/intolerance related.

As a woman and a mother, coupled with her scientific understanding, Paulin is making lasting impacts across the nation still.

Focusing her efforts on items, such as a lack of accurate information in the allergy space and supporting other families through such difficult times, creates tangible change.

GET THE APP TODAY!

“After I returned from overseas, I made it my mission to take full advantage of the freedom afforded to me. This includes building a better world for the generations after me, such as my two young daughters,” said Paulin. ”I strive to build a company that will empower women who want to continue breastfeeding.”

The future of Free to Feed™ is promising with Dr. Paulin at the helm.

She is a scientist by choice, a mom by chance and entrepreneur by necessity.

“Every single time I talked to another parent, which is every single day who's going through this, I'm reminded of my own journey of what I went through and how nobody should have to go through that alone,’ said Paulin.

“The test strips that we're creating will take that process from two months to five days. And that's worth it to me cause that is two months less of pain and suffering that the entire family has to go through.is going through and that's worth it.”

LeadHER

To greive much

is to love much

By: Kerri Jeter There are a certain number of National Holidays that impact the Veteran community deeply—Veteran’s Day, Independence Day and Memorial Day. As the end of May approaches each year, most people are looking forward to the kickoff of summer, but millions of other families face the reality that another summer will come and go without a loved one who died while serving our nation.

Grief is emotionally exhausting, and last year the pandemic had global impacts, especially for those struggling with grief and trauma following the death of military loved ones.

However, there is an organization that stands in the gap, leading the bereaved families with compassion, care and much-needed support.

Since 1994, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) has provided comfort and hope every hour of every day of the week through a national peer support network, programs and grief resources at no cost to surviving families.

Over 27 years ago, the LeadHER of TAPS, Bonnie Carroll suffered the loss of her great love, her husband, Brig. Gen. Tom Carroll. He perished in an Army plane crash in 1992 along with seven other soldiers. Bonnie turned her tragedy into a purposeful effort to create what is today the major national program providing compassionate care for all who are grieving the death of a service member.

“You know, at that time life just ceased to be. It just stopped. His life ended physically and my life ended in a different way. Everything we had planned for, hoped for, just came to an end,” recalled Carroll. “ So, it was over the course of the days and the weeks and the months to come, that I struggled to find the kind of support I knew existed for other types of loss in our society. And it didn't exist for the military. So that began the journey to create an organization.”

In addition to founding and serving as the President of TAPS, Carroll also held appointments in the government, including White House Liaison at the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) under President George W. Bush, Executive Assistant to the President for Cabinet Affairs under President Reagan, and in Baghdad, Iraq, as the Senior Advisor to the Iraqi Ministry of Communications during Operation Iraqi Freedom.

Carroll retired as a major in the Air Force Reserve following 31 years of service, where her career included serving as Chief, Casualty Operations, Headquarters U.S. Air Force.

Prior to joining the USAFR, Maj. Carroll served 16 years as both a noncommissioned officer and then a commissioned officer in the Air National Guard as a Transportation Officer, Logistics Officer and Executive Officer.

For eight years of her career, she was the commander of a motor pool and the only woman and the only officer among 60 men in that unit. But she was able to create a family during the time she was there.

They experienced a lot of heartache during those eight years. Their first Sergeant died of a heart attack. Another one of their airmen died by suicide and then her husband died. The grief bonded them like family.

Bonnie Carroll and her great love, Brig. Gen Tom Carroll.

Bonnie Carroll early in her career.

“After Tom was killed, I came home one day in the winter in Anchorage, Alaska, weeks after my husband had died, and the whole side of my house was stacked with firewood for the winter. My fellow Guardsmen had done that for my family without being asked, because that’s what we do for each other,” said Carroll. “And on that first Valentine's day, it was so awkward as the newly grieving widow in my office. Everybody just avoided me because they knew it was emotionally difficult, but then an enormous bouquet of flowers was delivered with a card signed by all the guys in the motor pool, simply saying we love you.”

There were eight spouses left behind as a result of the plane crash. In the early days, none of these young widows were coping well, so they started reaching out to one another. They found they were living parallel lives with the same pain, the same nightmares, the same anxieties, the same struggles.

“Grief is about love. We only grieve because we love, so grief really is a broken heart. The only thing that will really ease the pain of that broken heart is to be with another who truly understands because they too have had that broken heart barely beating in their chest,” stated Carroll.

But with the same pride in their husbands’ service to their country and the same bond of being a military family. When they got together, they were not alone, their pain was validated, and without judgment, they could talk about it, which offered incredible healing and it was incredibly empowering.

“So we said, we've got to do something to really capture this healing energy and make it available to others in the military community. So that's the foundation of TAPS.”

Grief is about love.

Grief really took a center stage last year with the COVID-19 Pandemic, the work TAPS has been doing for over three decades is applicable to first responders, healthcare workers and all fellow Americans affected by isolation, fear and loss.

In 2020, TAPS connected 7,583 newly bereaved families into their compassionate care.

There are well over 100,000 surviving members of the TAPS organization who are able to utilize the incredible resources, programs and support from the only organization of its kind.

The TAPS organization is receiving an average of 21+ new survivors each day and provides support regardless of the manner of death, duty status of the military, survivors' relationship to the deceased or where the survivors are on their grief journey.

Survivors can find that connecting with TAPS will help honor and remember your loved one, empower survivors with healthy coping resources, connect with peer-based emotional support, education on trauma care and bereavement healing, and most importantly compassionate community.

Staffed 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year, the TAPS national helpline is the only 24/7 grief helpline in the nation for those who have lost military loved ones.

Callers will always be greeted with a live-answer caring professional to support the caller with casework, emotional support or connections to other resources.

“So together, we just find that connection, you know, and we have so many, so many family members now that are peer mentors who are folks in our community that we've trained to be a support to another, which can be as specific as if you've lost a twin; if you were pregnant at the time of loss; if you witnessed the suicide of your loved one,” explains Carroll. “We have others who are further down that road, who can be there for you, who can hold your pain and lessen it to carry your burden. It's incredibly impactful.”

The TAPS National Military Survivor Seminar and Good Grief Camp have been held annually in Washington, D.C., over Memorial Day weekend since 1994. During the pandemic, TAPS shifted events to virtual platforms.

With more than 2,700 military survivors under the age of 18, engaged with TAPS in 2020, it is critical for their mission to stay focused on the emotional support and mentorship needed for helping children cope with grief.

They created flat mentor dolls, similar to Flat Stanley, so mentees could see the smiling face of their mentor and create a new adventure of hope and joy for both the military mentor and the grieving military child while staying socially distanced.

The organization also conducts regional survivor seminars for adults and youth programs at locations across the country, as well as retreats and expeditions around the world.

Staff can get you connected to counseling in your community and help navigate benefits and resources.

In 2020, the TAPS Women Empowerment Program welcomed more first-time attendees than any other program.

Which helps bereaved women to redefine identity, reclaim power, and move forward with courage, resilience and new hope. A holistic approach to mind, body, spirit.

The Love Work Virtual Retreat was a five-week program that connected 140+ women navigating the grief healing journey.

All-in-all TAPS, continues to serve and help bereaved families year after year.

In 2020, they helped families receive $3.9M in retroactive benefits; connected families with $180M in educational benefits; empowered 3,050 women with their Women’s Empowerment Program; and helped lessen the burden of grief by answering more than 13,000 calls received at the 24/7 helpline.

TAPS facilitates meeting between Afghan and American women with the goal of healing hearts broken by so many sacrifices made. Photo by Lance Cpl. Kris Daberkoe And if that weren’t enough, TAPS also has global reach. Recognizing that grief is universal, TAPS unifies organizations caring for families of military deceased around the globe to go beyond borders, rise above political and religious differences and transcend language barriers to bring hope and healing for all who grieve their heroes of war.

War tears families, countries and the world apart, but love and grief are building things back together for a better future as the power of grief and community aid in peacebuilding globally.

If you have lost a loved one whose life included military service and have not reached out to TAPS yet, reach out and get the grief and healing support from others who understand your pain. You do not have to spend another day alone in your grief.

The inspiration at TAPS is simply to rise above and recognize the higher powers at work in our lives— that in the darkest moments, hope can be found.

Photo by Petty Officer 1st Class Daniel Hinton

In honor of those who have served and died.

HER NEXT

Mission

MINDS E T YOUR

P O W ER T O O L By: Laura Jones

“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” ― Napoleon Hill

W

ith the right mindset, we can do anything. How many times have you had to get your mind right in order to get through a challenging situation or accomplish a goal?

As veterans, we all have experienced a mindset adjustment. When we signed on the dotted line, we understood the sacrifices that came with our service and how our lives would be changed by our experiences.

“We, as women veterans, have an extraordinary skill set that we often undervalue. We believe we must be subject matter experts in the business we run,” said Villarreal-Younger. ”Sometimes that is the case, but in reality, if we step back and assess our skills we can likely work in any industry we feel drawn to.”

Take some time to reflect on your unique and wide-ranging experiences because these can be translated into an inventory of our skills and abilities.

From stepping into the Military Entrance Processing Station (MEPS) to basic training and technical school, our mindset grew and developed from our unique experiences.

With detailed expertise and an empowered mindset, we are prepared to explore the many opportunities available to us. Entrepreneurship is an option, which exercises our growth mindset even further.

From day one to day “done”, our mindset has been calibrated and sharpened into the ultimate power tool that will continue to grow and serve us for the rest of our lives.

“The real leap that needs to happen is to see yourself as an entrepreneur and fully embrace it to move your company to the next level,” explains Villarreal-Younger.

Mirtha Villarreal-Younger, a combat Army veteran is the CEO and foundHER of Agile Construction Inc, a general contracting firm specializing in federal government contracting, construction management and professional development services in the state of California.

“My husband, currently serving in the Army National Guard, and I own Agile Construction Inc. We both love the construction field, and we each bring very different skill sets required for success.

His experience is in construction and construction management, my experience is in organizational development, management, fiscal oversight, contract compliance and marketing. We both love project management. It's a great partnership.”

She shares her perspective on the importance of keeping our mindset active post-service.

Mirtha Villarreal and her husband Martin Younger at one of their current worksites in West Sacramento, California.

It took a while to fully embrace the entrepreneur mindset.

FS: Describe your mindset transformation from service member to entrepreneur and what inspired your construction business?

It took a while to fully embrace the entrepreneur mindset. I was uncomfortable with the actual term, entrepreneur, it seemed something so foreign from military service.

The transformation began once I realized that I was prepared to take on the challenge of building a company and have it be successful. I have always loved construction.

My husband and I have renovated five homes and it is amazing how a neglected house can be transformed with good design and quality workmanship. I caught the commercial construction bug after seeing the renovation of downtown Sacramento with the construction of the Golden One Center.

Even before the construction began there was so much excitement, so many possibilities and I just knew I wanted to be in that field.

FS: How has your military mindset and experience influenced your business?

Wow, this could really be a long answer! The most important military takeaway for me is the ideal of integrity and trust, you cannot lead troops without it and you cannot build a company without it.

Mirtha at the Kabul Military Training Center 2005 receiving a briefing from French military officer during a training exercise.

(Courtesy Photo).

FS: What did you have to "unlearn" or "relearn" in your entrepreneur experience?

FS: What did you have to "unlearn" or "relearn" in your entrepreneur experience?

As crazy as it sounds I had to unlearn the desire for strict structure. I felt a little lost with no dictated place to be or to report to. I had to learn to build my own schedule, with what worked for me.

I keep the end state in mind. Whether it is a short project or long-term goal I have a clear picture of what the finished product should be. Sometimes the process is not what I first envisioned, but it's part of the journey.

Sometimes that is getting up at 4:30 in the morning to finish paperwork so I can volunteer for my daughter’s school trip and that is perfectly okay.

FS: What is your best advice for our sister veterans in continuing our journey of service beyond the uniform?

Don’t let anyone, most especially yourself, underestimate your skills! You got this!

Rare and wonderful opportunity to interact with Afghan children while on a mission to deliver school supplies to a local village. (Courtesy photo).

Dear Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Thank you!

Read how RBG was able to rise in a male-dominated profession and how she used her knowledge of the law to benefit all women, especially servicewomen in the ranks of the U.S. Military.

By: Joanna Sweatt

It’s been nearly eight months since Ruth Bader Ginsburg died at the age of 87.

Although we had never met, the graceful petite lady nicknamed, ‘The Notorious RBG’ has been a huge influence on my life and her death hit me terribly hard during an already taxing, politically charged time of year—the 2020 Presidential election which included a woman, Kamala Harris as the VP nominee had just begun.

I was immediately affected and deeply saddened by the loss of RBG’s vision, voice and reasoning about our laws in the United States of America—specific to improving women’s rights and equality.

In 1948, President Truman signed the Women’s Armed Services Integration Act into law.

This Act legally permitted women to serve in the U.S. Armed Forces in a number of official capacities and the act allowed women to serve in all four branches of the military—RBG was 15years old in 1948 and I can only imagine what that impact had on a young girl growing up at the time.

By 1956, at 23, RBG had graduated from Harvard Law School, was married and had her first child—a daughter.

There are five specific laws that RBG helped to pass to achieve gender equality in the U.S and three of those laws are especially impactful for women — especially to those who have served or are currently serving in the U.S. Military.

Even though I had never imagined joining the military growing up, I relished in watching progressive women on television being ‘unconventional’ like Mary Tyler Moore, Cagney & Lacey, and Laverne & Shirley.

I couldn’t wait to become an official ‘working’ woman one day and I also dreamed of being a ‘shot-caller’ boss in those future spaces.

I remember the first time watching Who’s the Boss and being introduced to Angela Bower, a woman who was an executive at work and a <inset gasp> single mother with a house maid-man named Tony.

Those examples were so out of the box for me living and growing up as an Air Force military brat because the standard norm in the late 70s and early 80s was still prominently working dads in the military with stay-at-home moms, who maybe had a part-time hobby job on base when the kids were at school.

Ginsburg with her American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU ), Women’s Rights Project partner, attorney Susan Deller Ross pushed to have pregnancy discrimination recognized as a form of sex discrimination.

They helped pass the Pregnancy Discrimination Act in 1993, an amendment to Title VII in 1978 which acknowledges pregnancy discrimination as unlawful.

Women are now more protected against getting fired or not considered for a job because they are pregnant or have plans to get pregnant.

By the time I joined the military in 1998 women could serve as mothers with a special waiver.

Her famous statement during that time was, “A gender line…helps to keep women not on a pedestal, but in a cage.”

Just a year earlier in 1995, newly appointed Marine Corps Commandant, Gen. Charles Krulak said women are important to the success of his force but have no place in ground combat because he didn’t believe that ‘they’ could do it.

A gender line… helps to keep women not on a pedestal, but in a cage.

I joined with one child and had two more while serving on active duty in the Marine Corps.

Back in 1996, the year that I graduated high school, Ginsburg led the ruling decision in the U.S. v. Virginia case where she argued that women should be allowed to join the same program as men at the Virginia Military Institute, which was receiving state funding.

He did implement equal physical fitness test requirements and admittedly, he believed the previous large attrition for women recruits was due to their lack of preparation and exposure to the rigors of being in boot camp and he

worked to improve that.

Although he wasn’t interested in women taking over infantry roles, he understood that women could be flooded into combat support roles, even placed in imminent danger doing their jobs—just not with the infantry.

This opened the door for me to earn the title U.S. Marine without an asterisk. By 1998, I was a woman that had graduated

This opened the door for me to earn the title U.S. Marine without an asterisk. By 1998, I was a woman that had graduated Recruit Training under the same physical requirements that male recruits were expected to accomplish as well as earn my official title ‘Marine’ through the culminating experience the Marine Corps calls’ The Crucible.

Ginsburg also impacted the Equal Credit Opportunity Act, which passed in 1974 and allowed women to apply for bank accounts, credit cards, and mortgages without a male co-signer and she ensured that women could receive the same military housing allowances as men, and women were no longer required to pay more for pension plans than men to receive the same benefits, according to the ACLU. “Feminism [is the] notion that we should each be free to develop our own talents and not be held back by man made barriers,” Ginsburg said in her 2016 book My Own Words.

I can recall how empowered I myself had felt during the summer of 1993 when I scored my first job as a hostess at Red Lobster which required me to open my very own bank account and it was unbeknownst to me that women, just 19-years earlier could not do that without a man as the ‘authority’ over her ability to access financial services and benefits.

This particular Act also ensured that my time in the U.S. Military would garner me the same pay and access to benefits as any other man who served.

Unfortunately, the progression for women—although continuous is still arduous and discombobulated due to the deeply rooted patriarchal establishment of the United States and frankly, pretty much all over the world.

In 1997 even after these progressive law changes, I still had to be married and receive written permission from my husband to join the U.S Marine Corps because I had given birth to my first child a few months after graduating high school. In order to have joined on my own accord in 1997 and not be married meant that I would have had to put my daughter up for adoption prior to enlisting.

Adding marriage to my life at 19 in order to access a better opportunity in the Marine Corps seemed reasonable at the time however; I realize now, it is and was still a barrier to bear as a woman wanting to join the service whereas if my husband, a single father wanted to join the service, he could have with ease and would not have had to relinquish his ‘rights’ to his child and place that child up for adoption.

This and other issues illuminate the red-tape loopholes that still exist in issues related to women when making decisions for themselves and with the loss of RBG in late 2020, the fear is who will help take us further?

Who will help us fight back against the gender oppression we still experience in our everyday life as women and against the toxic leadership that works hard to undermine the progression of women whether they are serving in the U.S. Military or civilian sector employment?

Who can we align with as service women and women veterans to continue our fight for equality?

Ginsburg said that she chose the ACLU platform because of the integral interconnection between civil liberties and civil rights, including women’s rights.

‘I wanted to be a part of a general human rights agenda . . . [promoting] the equality of all people and the ability to be free.’

Integrating women service members into the U.S. Military has not only made us a better military but it has also allowed us to serve by volunteerism requirements instead of having to draft men unwillingly.

As the share of women in the military increases, so does the share of veterans who are women.

Ten years ago, the 2010 Current Population Survey estimated that there are just over 22 million veterans, almost 1.8 million of whom are women (8%); and among the estimated 2.2 million post-9/11 veterans, more than 400,000 (19%) are women.

Today’s women veterans have served in every era dating back to World War II, when women in the Women’s Army Corps (WAC) and other voluntary divisions served in positions other than nurses for the first time.

The majority of female veterans (53%) served sometime during the quarter century between Vietnam and Sept. 11, 2001. Of these women, 27% served between the end of the Vietnam conflict and July 1990, and 26% served between August 1990 and 9/11.

Some 23% of women veterans have served in the post-9/11 era.

Women who serve in the military today differ in some ways from the men that they serve alongside.

The current active-duty female force is more racially diverse than the male force.

Today’s military women are less likely than men to be married and less likely to serve in a combat zone.

However, in many ways the experiences they have are similar to their male counterparts: they are just as likely to be officers and they have similar experiences re-entering and adjusting to civilian life once discharged.

Dear RBG, Thank you! You got us started and showed us how to put skin in the game and your legacy and examples are what we shall refer to as we continue to honor you through our continued service and fight!

The Enduring Campaign: InfluenceHER on a mission.

By: Kerri Jeter

Rachelle LaFleur is a Marine on a mission to serve transitional veteran centers that offer critical services to veterans including housing and re-integration programs.

The Enduring Campaign, her nonprofit is actively building relationships with centers across the nation to provide them with the items that are needed to support the veterans in their care.

She has an incredible presence on Instagram and we love following her to see the impact she is making as an influenceHER and we are so here for it!

Freedom and Fleurs is clever and cute, how did you come up with your handle?

RL: My maiden name is LaFleur, which translates to “the flower” in French. I have always loved this name and so naturally I knew part of my handle had to incorporate something personal. Freedom felt like a natural choice because I have fought for it and I believe in it. Voilà, Freedom and Fleurs was born!

You have a pretty big following on IG, when did you start using IG? RL: I have been using Instagram for 4-5 years now, but really only used it for personal photos. It was really during COVID’s quarantine that I started to realize there is a broader network of very like-minded people that I had the potential to connect with, so I started actively using it with a purpose.

When did you realize you were an influencer?

RL: I feel as if it is cliché to say, “I don’t feel like an influencer” because that is not true. What I am a strong believer in, however, is that the number of followers someone has does not dictate whether they can influence others or not. I have been influenced by IG users with 500 followers and I have been underwhelmed by individuals who have 500,000 followers. As it relates to my story, I knew that the Freedom and Fleurs platform had some type of influence when small businesses and non-profits were benefiting from my recommendations to those that do follow.

What did you do to grow your impact on IG? RL: If I had to summarize my growth into three words it would be consistency, honesty, and vulnerability.

From a consistency standpoint I always stand by my message of being a good human, as well as showcasing my genuine care for my veteran brothers and sisters. Just as significant is being genuine in that consistency. If I repost content I do it because it was compelling to me and I oftentimes write a message of WHY it is compelling. That is oftentimes a conversation starter with the content creator, which has lead to many friendships.

Next, honesty. I post the good, I post the bad. I write captions that many would regard as too long, especially if you’re Googling Social Networking 101. That’s just not who I am; I am dramatic, I talk a lot, and I want my entire thought heard as opposed to one catchy sentence that makes zero impact on anybody’s life.

Finally, honesty. Going off of the last sentence I wrote, I have always been a firm believer that if I can improve or inspire even ONE person I am doing what I should be doing. Therefore I am brutally honest and vulnerable in a lot of my content. Whether it is my mental health, my Dad’s suicide, parenting, or day-to-day life, I want to be vulnerable for others to know that they are not alone.

How do you decide which brands to represent?

RL: I seek and support brands that are giving back to a cause I believe in. Many of those causes are veteran-related, but I have supported causes such as COVID relief and domestic violence.

Those brands inspire me to be a better person because of their willingness to give back to communities and groups that need it the most.

You have a giant heart for veterans. I was so excited for your enduring campaign to begin.

RL: Thank you so much! It has been a wild ride to say the least. 😊

Rachelle's Son, Landon packing up essentials for a service center. (courtesy photo).

Packages loaded up and ready to go! (courtesy photo).

What is the Enduring Campaign, how did you pick the name and what is your mission?

RL: The Enduring Campaign is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit whose name is a play-off of my Operation Enduring Freedom (OEF) deployment. Our primary mission is to support veteran transitional centers throughout the nation by supplying them with in-kind donations.

The primary purposes of a veteran transitional center is reintegration of veterans to civilian life and includes support such as home placement, mental health services, guidance on VA entitlements, support in seeking employment, and more. While many veteran transitional centers receive grants from the VA, it oftentimes does not cover all of the expenses to support veterans in their program. We provide anything from hygiene kits, to cleaning supplies, to welcome home packages with small appliances, plates, and bedding.

How can people help you be successful at helping the veteran community?

RL: The biggest help does not always need to come in donations, many times it is engagement and spreading the word so people know that your cause exists.

What’s the craziest experience you have had on IG as an influencer?

RL: There are genuinely cruel people out there that take pleasure out of exploiting other’s pain. I have had individuals tell me devastating stories in the DM’s that they knew I would respond to, only to find out they made up the stories to get me to message.

My biggest piece of advice: protect yourself and your mental health. I’ve learned that the best I can do is share my story and offer advice on how others can seek help.

What are you most proud of as a Marine?

RL: Not to be too vague, but I am just proud to be a Marine. There were so many people out there that believed I would never even make it through bootcamp, let alone a year deployment.

The Marine Corps taught me I am so much stronger and capable of anything I put my mind to than I ever gave myself credit for.

Do you have hobbies? If so, what?

RL: Absolutely! I love reading (non-fiction war history is a favorite, especially anything to do with the Vietnam War), baking, decorating, and crafting. I also love writing and need to start dedicating more of my time to it because it is so positive for my mental health.

Since Mother’s Day is this month and you’re a mom, the most important influence you have is right at home. Can you tell share the most important influence you want to teach your son?

RL: I have an 8-year-old who is a white male that asks for nothing. As a woman who has worn many different hats, I understand his privilege. I want him to understand that as well. We always have conversations about being a good human as opposed to “being a good man.” It is my goal in life that I raise a human that accepts every other human on this Earth, no matter how different or similar we are.

FOLLOW

@FREEDOMANDFLEURS

By: Elis Salamone

Are you missing out on one of the most powerful social media platforms in the world?

LinkedIn was started in 2002 as a business/employee orientation website.

Today the platform has over 650 million members, 250 million active members and it is used in 250 countries.

LinkedIn is a professional networking platform that when used correctly can open incredible employment and networking opportunities.

Does your profile garnered attention to you as a subject matter expert or do you still have a selfie as your profile picture?

Just like any professional circle of influence your LinkedIn profile is the first look into you as a brand.

What does your profile say about you?

If you want to maximize your profile to find those unique professional growth opportunities or to expand your network or business, keep reading.

Let us start with the basics, your profile picture!

Yes, a picture is as important as you are wearing an appropriate interview outfit.

PROFILE PICTURE TIPS: Smile

BANNER:

Wear a professional top, if you’re transitioning from the military wear a civilian top, once you separate you will no longer be wearing the uniform to work.

Your logo, tag line, industry photo.

No distracting backgrounds.

The dimensions you need are 1584 x 396px; you can also Google, LinkedIn banners and choose something you like.

Make it a recent headshot (you can do a great headshot with your phone and a friend), not a photo from 10 years ago that does not even look like you any more.

Please no selfies, especially in your car!

If you want to get creative, you can create a banner using Canva.

Whatever you do, do not leave it with the plain banner, this screams ‘novice’!

HEADLINE: Your first 50 characters are the “hook” that make people want to visit your profile, however if looking for a job this should be the job title that you are seeking to obtain, for example if looking for a marketing job, then simply write Marketing Executive. Another example is describing what you are currently doing: Coach, Educator, Small Business Owner and so on.

ABOUT: The first three sentences are the most important. They need to be interesting enough to make your potential client/recruiter want to click to “read more”. After that, try using bullet points to make the content easy to read and quick to digest. What you did, how you did it and the outcome. Think big impact, what makes you unique and remarkable in your industry. Add a little information about yourself outside of work, add some personality.

People are curious and want to get to know you.

Through LinkedIn the employer gets a firsthand view of who you are…your personality, what you’re thinking, who’s in your network, any mutual connections and your online presence —LinkedIn is not Facebook, so keep it professional at all times.

FEATURED:

This is an area to post content that speaks of your work: articles, podcast interviews, things you have written, etc. This is a highlight reel to what you are up to and recent and past successes.

EXPERIENCE: This is essentially your living resume. It is best to write out this information on a word document so you can format it in bullet points then copy and paste. Add and adjust, as necessary. Make sure to add at least 3-5 highlights from each job: what you did, how you did it and outcome/revenue generated, etc.

RECOMMENDATIONS: Recommendations add credibility to your profile and professional presence. If you are a business owner this is a place for former and current clients to write about your services or products. You should get recommendations from anyone that you do business with that can vouch for you as a professional. If you deliver a service, get your clients to write you a recommendation about your talents, value and services.

What you should know about LinkedIn is, you must engage, engage, engage to get your name out there as a subject matter expert and to expose your brand, how you think and what value you bring to the table. Another important aspect of LinkedIn is networking.

Do intentional networking with people that you are interested in engaging with, people in industries you are curious about and people outside your circle. When you send a connection note, personalize it with a quick note of why you want to connect.

Request an informational call to get to know the person and story. People love telling their story and you would be surprised how many people will schedule some time with you.

Make sure that if you post that you engage with the people that comment on your post to increase your engagement. Do not just post and leave. Engage with your audience. Reply to every comment and keep the conversation going. There is an algorithm to all of this and the first hour of your post is considered the magic hour for whether your post will get pushed out further or not.

If you are just starting out on LinkedIn the magic number for your network is 500+ connections. This may seem like a lot of people but it really is not. Every time you meet someone new you should connect with them on LinkedIn. Make sure to use at least three hashtags relevant to your post or content so that people can read that amazing article or post that you wrote.

If you are currently in the job market looking for work, make sure to follow companies you are interested in working for and even connect with people within that company to learn more. You would be surprised how many people love talking about their careers and how they got there and want to share their stories.

If you want an evaluation of your profile or learn more on how you can improve your profile or presence, feel free to reach out to me! https://www.linkedin.com/in/elissalamone/

Andrea Rathbun By:

DITCH THE BOOZE

What are your reasons to be SobHER?

I was not a big drinker in high school. It just was not my thing. This followed me into my first couple of years in the Army.

For those of us who served, this may not be a surprising find. What may surprise you is that our Sisterhood is at an increased risk.

There was the occasional round of shots in a barracks room or an underthe-table beer at the club while hiding my underage wristband. But for the most part, I was dry, until I turned 21 in Iraq. I came home with a new ID, a new mindset about booze and a million excuses to drink.

Drinking, and in particular problem drinking, has experienced a sharp increase among the general female population starting in the 1970s.

As it turns out, I was not alone. Alcohol abuse is alarmingly common in service members returning from deployment.

Figures reported from the Department of Veterans Affairs state that 1 in 10 veterans who deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan go on to develop problems associated with alcohol or drug abuse.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has compiled multiple pieces of data regarding this trend to include: Approximately 13% of adult women report binge drinking and on average do so 4 times a month, consuming five drinks per binge.

In 2019, 4% of women overall and 8% of women aged 18 to 25 years had an alcohol use disorder.

There is also extensive research surrounding the relationship between Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and problems with alcohol.

It is noted on the VA website that this relationship has a greater impact on women than men, with women being two and a half times more likely to develop alcohol abuse or dependency if they have experienced PTSD as opposed to men being two times more likely under the same circumstances.

Where does this leave me and my million excuses to drink?

It leaves me finding my reasons.

Where excuses gave me permission to live a less full life hiding in alcohol, reasons give me the power to live an honest life facing myself.

8% of women aged 18 to 25 years had an alcohol use disorder.

The best part, it only takes a few reasons to conquer a million excuses.

My daughters, who are cool and amazing and wonderful, unless I am hungover.

Then they are not so much fun.

My husband, who is funny and warm and supportive and trusts my opinion on important matters.

That is a responsibility and honor that deserves a clear mind.

My family who I miss deeply but tend to bombard while drinking and avoid in the aftermath.

My wallet because as it turns out alcohol is expensive. As a side note, a cute sundress costs about the same as a twelve pack.

My health, both physical and mental.

Sober me sleeps, eats, runs and plays better.

And, almost always beat my husband in cards.

The best part, it only takes a few reasons to conquer a million excuses.

While these reasons are powerful, reasons are not always enough. This is where the VA can help.

If you have found your reasons and need support you can find more helpful information below.

They have created a comprehensive program to address substance abuse among veterans.

k for care Clic

The treatment options include but are not limited to medically managed detoxification, drug substitution therapy, short-term outpatient counseling and intensive outpatient treatment.

These benefits are covered by the VA health care program. In order to access services you will need to first apply for VA health care.

Guide to VA Mental Health Services for Veterans & Families.

Alcohol Abuse Among Veterans PTSD and Problems with Alcohol Use Substance use treatment for Veterans

Woman

Warrior

Art Heals War Wounds One MotHER's grief journey

By: Amber Valencia

“David was an artist at a young age, he used art to help him cope when he would come home on leave from deployment,” Tina Drakulich, David’s mother stated. “Starting David J. Drakulich Foundation was part of my healing and the continuing of David’s legacy, it’s what he would have wanted.”

The David J. Drakulich Foundation is a small 501(c)3 Non-Profit in Reno, Nevada.

They are helping Veterans dealing with trauma, post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, depression and so much more through various art programs.

However, it started out as a vision to help Tina heal after tragically losing her son David in Afghanistan on January 9, 2008.

"Through my experience with grief and war related trauma, I’ve developed and clung to two understandings.

First, art heals and second, generosity protects one’s mental health"

Army Sgt. David J. Drakulich Died January 9, 2008 Serving During Operation Enduring Freedom 22, of Reno, Nev.; assigned to the 508th Parachute Infantry Regiment, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C.; died Jan. 9 in Chagali, Afghanistan, of wounds sustained when his vehicle struck an improvised explosive device.

Tina is holding a handmade paper craft of her son.

“With the support from Legends at Red Rock Hair and Nail Salon, I more or less provoked my family and close friends to develop a nonprofit,” Tina stated. “Together, we developed the David J. Drakulich Art Foundation for Freedom of Expression. We coined the vision statement, Art Heals War Wounds. It seemed unreal and abstract at the time. Little did I know then, that it would become very real and I would be the first beneficiary. During the building process, my heart began to mend. I made new friends, I gained a deeper self-understanding and strength, my depression and grief softened through the creative process. Through visual art I gained the ability to distance myself from the pain by creating a birds-eye view of it. I learned that I am not the only one with sorrow and disappointment. In short, I was a guinea pig and I can say that our hypothesis was indeed correct, Art Heals War Wounds."

One of the most used programs that the DJD Foundation hosts is the Veterans Art Project.

This project is currently being run in collaboration with the VA Hospital in Reno and the Northern Nevada State Veterans Home in Sparks, Nevada.

A trained art facilitator runs groups through various art experiences.

These groups allow Veterans who have experienced trauma to have open conversations with their peers and express how they feel through art, even if those conversations are not about the trauma itself it allows for an escape.

Many local Veterans utilize this program and their art has been showcased in various exhibits around Nevada.

The Combat Paper Project is also hosted

by DJD Foundation.

This program allows Veterans to bring in their old uniforms and process those uniforms into handmade paper.

In the coming months, DJD Foundation will be bringing back their Veterans Writing Project and Veterans will be able to get lessons in writing and then use the combat paper to write down their stories.

They will also be incorporating these stories into a podcast.

This podcast will be hosted by a Veteran and will bring on other Veterans to share their stories of their time in service and their journeys through navigating their mental health.

The goal is to continue to empower Veterans to share their experiences to show that none of us are alone. We all are going through something and the trick is to find what works to help ease the pain.

“Establishing this foundation was part of my healing and I probably wouldn’t be here without it,” Tina stated. “I knew that I wasn’t going to be okay if I wasn’t doing art and I was able to recognize that same thing was going on with David, that’s why he would come home and do art as he was struggling in his military career.”

Now utilizing different forms of art like drama, painting, drawing, writing, and crafting the combat paper they are helping Veterans to find the form they enjoy and navigate through whatever stage of healing they are in.

All these programs are free to Veterans and Tina’s goal is to get small groups like this all over the United States to help more Veterans begin to heal.

As DJD grows they want to keep Veterans at the center of their operation, letting Vets lead Vets. Their mission is to empower and showcase the wellness of veterans. They create art, humanities and recreation resources that support individuals as they improve and develop the quality of their own lives, one veteran at a time, one community at a time because art heals battle scars.

If you would like to get involved with DJD Foundation you can donate or request more information via their website www.arthealswarwounds.com.

Connect with us & share your stories! #amplifywomenveterans #freedomsistersmagazine

By: Jessica Morel This last year has been brutal for so many of us. Thankfully, we are beginning to see glimpses of what our new “normal” will look like.

So much has changed. Dreams put on hold. New dreams created. Businesses birthed and businesses lost. For most of us, we experienced a slowing down of life that challenged us to reconsider our life and ask the deep and honest question – what do I truly long for?

After my time in the Army, I grabbed life by the horns and implemented all the skills I learned while in service. I built a business, grew a family, and hustled my way to ensure that I had a seat at the table of life. It all felt right, until it did not.

Several years ago, longing started to stir within my heart. It started as a small tinge, and as the years have progressed, it has turned into a deep yearning. I longed to figure out how to slow my life down, how to ensure that this newly found speed that the world forced upon me would continue to be maintained, post covid. I found such peace in nearly clearing out my calendar, having uninterrupted conversations with my loved ones at home and being able to just sit and do absolutely nothing.

I realize that life will pick back up and our calendars will soon start to fill, but I know that I will be critical of what I do choose to put on my calendar. I will protect the longing in my heart for stillness and quality time with my family. I will defend my emotional and spiritual health and say no to things that do not align with my desires of peace.

In John 14:27, Jesus tells his disciples, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.” (NAB) I believe that we are called to seek peace in our hearts and protect it. We are called to live our life authentically and boldly.

Freedom Sisters, I pray that as the world slowly starts to open back up, that we seek the courage to stay true to the longings of our heart and rest in God’s peace.

Ways to show you love her.

By: Dana Richmond

Love comes in so many beautiful packages. I absolutely love to buy gifts for people.

Anytime I am out and about I keep my eye open for things that just have (fill in the person’s name) written all over them.

There have been many times at work that I have walked into my office to find an energy drink, snack, or other small but very appreciated surprise on my desk.

Gift giving is how I show and receive love.

As fun as these are, it is often the gifts received in times of trouble that touch us the most.

I will never forget one day when I was at an urgent care with my daughter with a high fever and a stomach bug.

I thought I had come prepared; however, she proceeded to throw up on all the sets of clothing and was wrapped in just a blanket as we waited for the doctor.

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Maya Angelou

There was a woman in the waiting room with her own children, who unbeknownst to me had her older daughter go to their home and bring clothes to the urgent care for my sick little girl. I barely was able to thank her, never got her name, but remember her often.

There are different kinds of gifts!

Service: Sometimes we all

Presence: Sometimes we

need a hand! Do you have a

just need someone to

friend who needs to move

there. Someone to

stuff, organize a closet, or

sit with us

clean out a garage?

while we cry.

Someone whose yard needs

Someone to eat junk food and watch crime shows.

attention?

A friend who could use a girls night, a new girl who needs friends, or a mama who could just use 10 minutes of quiet to herself?

Sometimes we can help by putting in the legwork to set up a group activity, pitching in during mundane tasks, dropping off dinner when someone is sick, or offering to babysit.

Teamwork makes the dreamwork, tag in where you can!

Someone to drag us to the gym.

Someone who will quickly respond to our texts.

Just someone there, sticking by us and giving us grace and support as we navigate the hills and valleys of life.

In the words of the iconic Golden Girls theme song “Thank you for being a friend….”

Words: I do not know about you but for me an unexpected compliment goes a long way! A simple positive remark to someone about what they are doing, wearing or accomplishing can be such a blessing; regardless of what kind of a day they are having.

Be a cheerleadHER and an encourageHER!

Gift Giving: If you are financially able to buy physical gifts, it is not about buying someone’s Spiritual Kindness: It can be tricky to give things of a spiritual nature, but you can always pray for those you know and those you do not know.

Intercessory concern and support is a gift even if they do not know they are receiving it!

Spiritual gifts are supernatural talents that vary from person to person, use your gifts to help make the world be a more compassionate place.

affection— it is about the thought put into something that they may need or want.

For those already in our lives it may be easy to determine what kind of gift this might be, but for strangers it could be something simple like paying for someone’s coffee, “paying it forward” at a drive thru or helping a stranger at the grocery store who may not have enough to cover their items. It is the thought not the cost that counts.

We all struggle from time to time and someone is in need of a gift of kindness today, maybe you will cross their path, needing some love that could improve their mood, day or overall well-being because you crossed their path.

click here for playlist

Warrior ongs

This song was written

by Army VetHERan, Clarissa DiPietro.

From the recording Women at War: Warrior Songs Vol. 2 Source: Testimony and writings of Army Veteran Carissa DiPietro, mother of Ashley Guinta who was killed on 08/21/2001 Lyrics by Dave Nooe & Carissa A DiPietro Music by Dave Nooe Lead Vocals: Jenny Anne Backup Vocals & Guitars: Dave Nooe Keyboards & Percussion: Joseph Lekkas Bass: Scott Harrison Drums: Erin Nelson Engineered & Produced by Joseph Lekkas at Greenland Studios - Nashville, TN on 05/23/2018 * Dave and Jenny Anne Nooe, father and stepmother of Charlotte Nooe 02/28/1989 - 01/11/2012 © Warrior Songs - facebook.com/jennyannemusic/

Through her testimony and journaling, she was able to be the voice of her slained daughter, Ashley Guinta who was tragically murdered on August 21, 200 Many Veterans find healing through the incredible mission of Warrior Songs.

Get your free download here.

Happy Mother's day 2021!

LIKE MOTHER,LIKE DAUGHTER SERVICE IS A FAMILY BUSINESS! Join us for some amazing conversations all month long on the Freedom Sisters Podcast. We talk to five mother/daughter duos who served this nation.

Swipe right to meet all the amazing ladies we chat to this month!

New episodes drop every Monday!

Subscribe so you never miss an episode.

Dynam i c Duos

RETIRED MAJ. VENITA SHACKLEFORD SEAMAN BRIANNA RHEAN Mom: U.S. Army | 16 years | Major Daughter: U.S Navy | 2 years | Seaman

duo #1

Listen on 05.03.2021

determined daughter

Major Mom

Unforgettable chat about the bond of a single mother family raising two daughters who persevered and thrived in a military career.

CAPT. ANN POTTER CAPT. MOLLY MAE POTTER Mom: U.S. Army | 4 years | Capt.

Daughter: U.S Air Force | 6 years | Capt.

Humble Healer

duo #2

im A igh er H hiev ac

Listen on 05.10.2021

A powHERful chat about service, bond and wellness this duo are humble high achievers who embody service before self.

RETIRED CAPT. KATHY DONOVAN PETTY OFFICER 1ST CLASS EMILY CIROCCO Mom: U.S. Navy | 30 years | Capt.

Daughter: U.S Navy | 2 years | Petty Officer 1st Class

duo #3

Listen on 05.17.2021

Legendar y lady

legacy bearer

A blended family, full of love, honor and service that breaks down barriers to the status quo and proves that leadHERship starts at home and it's never too late to belong.

SGT. TERYN ZECH PETTY OFFICER 3RD CLASS ASHLEY SOMERS Mom: U.S. Army | 13 years | Sergeant Daughter: U.S Coast Guard | 4 years | Petty Officer 3rd Class

duo #4

Pen P als best friends

Listen on 05.24.2021

An incredible story of adoption, bond of service and the incredible story of connection throughout the years.

SGT. TANYA WOOD SPC. AMBER WOOD-DAVILA Mom: U.S. Army | 4 years | Sgt. Daughter: U.S Army | 4 years | Spc.

duo #5

bonus mo with a b m ig heart

e l o ha w d e ol v o live life t ll fu Listen on 05.31.2021

The incredible story of acceptance and love in a blended family who restored brokenness and proof that healing and wholeness is possible.

t h g i l h g i H

HER

Highlight Woman Veteran Emerging Businesses you should know about!

Have you ever listened to a pilot speak not over the intercom? Well, thankfully you can! Karen Baetzel, a retired U.S. Naval Pilot is using her experience in the air to make a difference on the ground. Whether she’s in the air or on the ground, it’s clear that this speakHER is in charge!

Baetzel is a leadHERship speakHER who has been asked to speak for top governmental organizations such as NASA and the Department of Defense, as well as high profile civilian organizations like Microsoft. She has five different leadHERship communication programs that she can facilitate for you or your company!

If you’re looking to take your business or corporate communication and leadHERship to the next level, consider asking Baetzel to come speak. She is bound to have your performance sky high by the end of any of her programs!

Speak

Kelly Kennedy, is a U.S. Marine Corps VetHERan who covered the war efforts in both Afghanistan and Iraq.

Read

She is, notably, the first woman to report from a combat zone as an active-duty military journalist who returned to cover combat as a civilian journalist.

Kennedy signed up to serve at the tender age of 17 because she had career aspirations to be a journalist.

Now, Kennedy is an award-winning journalist and book author.

Pulling from her own military experience, Kennedy is the author of her own best-selling book, "They Fought for Each Other: The Triumph and Tragedy of the Hardest Hit Unit in Iraq," as well as the co-author of "Fight Like a Girl: The Truth Behind how Female Marines are Trained."

Though Kennedy is working on a rewrite of her first novel, we can’t wait to read her upcoming account of the Civil War. Support this sister and buy the book today! .

Shop

Mayhem in the Making is an incredible shop owned and operated by U.S. Air Force VetHERan, Madison DeWitte. Madison started selling personalized gifts as a means of expressing her creativity outside of her uniform and thanks to her sense of humor and good taste, Mayhem in the Making was born!

In her shop, you can create a custom gift for someone you love, even if that means yourself, or you can purchase her original designs!

If you are looking for cute, sassy or even borderline cheeky gifts and want great customer service and high quality products, Mayhem in the Making is the online shop for you!

Follow the shop on Instagram or Facebook to place orders!

If you are a woman veteran-owned business and want to be featured in our HighlightHER section, email us at info@freedomsisters.com

Podcast Amber Valencia is an Army National Guard vetHERan and both the creator and show host of Cultivating Purpose—a podcast for all women looking to support other women and follow their own dreams.

The podcast focuses on Valencia’s journey of starting and growing a small scale farm in northern Nevada with her husband. She also shares many stories from other Women FarmHERs. The (cultivating) purpose of the podcast is to create a safe space to discuss everything from farming to mental health to motherhood and how it can be balanced and cultivated with purpose.

The podcast is available on her website, iTunes, Google podcasts, Spotify and everywhere else you can stream podcasts.

Tune in to become a part of her tribe focused on growth and of course cultivating purpose.

LISTEN HERE

F r e e d o m

S i s t e r s

connection

We invite you to connect and build a community with our incredible EditHER and writeHER team.

We mean it when we say we believe in sisterhood!

We look forward to connecting on Instagram or Linkedin!

K ER RI J E T E R , E D I T H E R - I N -CHEIF

@FREEDOMSISTERSMEDIA

A A L IYA H A L - M A D H I , T R A VELHER

@PIXIETALES

C A R RIE H A M M E R , E Q U I P H ER

@CARRIE_THE_HAMMER

E . V . MOO R E , M A N A G I N G E DITHER

@EMPASSIONEDLIFE

B R I E B U R G E T T , A D V E N T U REHER

@THEBRIEADVENTURE

N A V IER E W A L K E W I C Z , M O TIVATEHER

@MRSBOSSL8EE

J E N NIF E R R O D R I G U E Z , E N C OURAGEHER

@JLRODRIGUEZ0106

J A Q CUE L I N E Z A P P E Y , E D UCATEHER

A MY FOR S Y TH E , R E M E M B ERHER

@JACQUELINE.ZAPPEY

@AMYFORSYTHE760

D I A LI CO L L - ME R C A D O , MILITAR Y MO T H E R H O O D

@THECHARLIEMIKE

EL I S SAL A MO N E , E Q U IPH E R

@253WANDERER

L A U RA J O N E S , I N N O V A T E HER

J O A NNA S W E A T T , I N S P I R EHER

@EL.COOLJAY

@JSWEEZYBREEZY

A N D REA R A T H B U N , I N F O R MHER

A MBER V A L E N C I A , H EA LHE R

LINKEDIN.COM/IN/ANDRA THBUN-101/

@THEVALENCIARANCH

JES SIC A M O R E L , B E L I E V E H ER

DANA R I CHMOND, S ISTERLY LOVE

J E N NIF E R B A L L O U , C O A C HHERR

@MAMAFLOWER4

@DANARICHMOND273

@ROSY1526

Shero Activation

MAY BE HER

I am a woman phenomenally, phenomenal woman that is your grandmother, that is your mother, that is your sister, that is you and that is me.

Connect with WriteHER Elis on #linkedin for a profile review.

—Maya Angelou

Leverage all the ways

Linkedin is great for post-service success!

Donate to make a difference, it's for a good cause and it will make your mom proud! www.theenduringcampaign.org/

Tune into the Freedom Sisters Podcast for our amazing mother/daughter Duo Series!

Love | Laughs | Legacy

Get the app | Share the App | Rate the App Free to Feed™ creates science-based content for allergen-free breastfeeding and is developing products to empower parents through infant allergies.