How do we receive feedback?

Receiving feedback

Question # 1 Why do you want feedback?

Why do you want feedback?

1. To find out what is correct and what is not correct about what you did?

2. To be praised for results?

3. To be praised for how you worked during the process?

4. To learn how to improve?

Adapted from https://hbr.org/2015/05/how-to-get-the-feedback-you-need

When you ask for feedback, you not only find out how others see you, you also influence how they see you.

http://hbr.org/2014/01/find-the-coaching-in-criticism

Question # 2 When do you want feedback?

Invite feedback when you are ready to hear the truth.

https://hbr.org/2015/08/the-key-to-giving-and-receiving-negative-feedback

The more often you ask for feedback, the less stressful it becomes to initiate the conversation and to hear the comments.

https://hbr.org/2015/05/how-to-get-the-feedback-you-need

Question # 3 From whom do you want feedback?

Get feedback from people 1. who have knowledge, 2. who are helpful, 3. that you trust.

https://hbr.org/2015/08/when-its-ok-to-ignore-feedback https://hbr.org/2015/08/how-to-handle-negative-feedback

Question # 4 What questions can you ask to get feedback?

What am I doing that is helpful?

What am I doing that is not helpful?

https://hbr.org/2019/01/to-improve-your-team-first-work-on-yourself

What is 1 thing I could improve on my blog?

What is one thing I could have done better during our conversation?

https://hbr.org/2015/05/how-to-get-the-feedback-you-need http://hbr.org/2014/01/find-the-coaching-in-criticism

“I want to be sure I understand what you’re saying. Do I understand you correctly that…..?”

This question can help the other person communicate clearly whatever his or her core message may be.

https://hbr.org/2015/08/how-to-handle-negative-feedback

“What I hear you saying is….. Have I understood that correctly?”

Restating the person’s feedback lets them know that his or her opinion matters and makes it more likely you’ll get additional feedback in the future from this person.

https://ideas-ted-com.cdn.ampproject.org/c/s/ideas.ted.com/how-to-get-better-at-receiving-feedback/amp/

Question # 5 What do you do with positive feedback?

Reflect on positive feedback you get:  What patterns can I identify in the positive feedback?  What opportunities can I find to express more of my best self?  What more can I learn about my strengths from whom?

https://hbr.org/2019/05/to-become-your-best-self-study-your-successes

Follow up on positive feedback. Example: “Thanks for noticing X. Much appreciated. Could you please tell me what was particular useful for you? I am trying to figure out what my strengths are, so I can continue to make a positive impact.”

https://hbr.org/2019/05/to-become-your-best-self-study-your-successes

Question # 6 What do you do with negative feedback?

Simply nod until the other person has completely finished giving his or her feedback. Thereby, you will make sure that your counterpart has said what he/she wants to say.

https://hbr.org/2015/08/how-to-handle-negative-feedback

“I appreciate your feedback. Is there anything else I should know?”

https://hbr.org/2015/08/how-to-handle-negative-feedback

It only takes a minute to express our gratitude.

http://www.inc.com/peter-economy/a-gratitude-guide-for-2014.html

Do not get defensive.

https://ideas-ted-com.cdn.ampproject.org/c/s/ideas.ted.com/how-to-get-better-at-receiving-feedback/amp/

Realize that when you do not defend yourself, you maximize learning.

https://hbr.org/2015/12/4-ways-to-become-a-better-learner

Allow your anger to express itself in the way you want.

However, avoid labelling the person as an idiot. Remember, that person took the time to offer feedback because he / she cares about you.

https://hbr.org/2016/10/using-harsh-feedback-to-fuel-your-career

Ask for time to consider feedback you have received.

That defuses the immediate situation.

https://hbr.org/2015/08/how-to-handle-negative-feedback

Additional sources of inspiration http://www.ascd.org/publications/educational-leadership/sept12/vol70/num01/Seven-Keys-to-Effective-Feedback.aspx http://www.businessinsider.com/linkedin-ceo-jeff-weiner-2014-6 http://www.fastcompany.com/1753874/feedback-usually-says-more-about-the-giver-than-the-receiver http://www.gsb.stanford.edu/news/headlines/carole-robin-feedback-gift https://hbr.org/2013/02/how-to-give-a-meaningful-thank http://humanresources.about.com/cs/communication/ht/receivefeedback.htm http://jp.dk/jptv/nyheder_erhverv/karriere/article2514562.ece https://www.amazon.de/Process-Consultation-Managers-Consultants-Jan-1987/dp/B00L6K68NQ/ p. 98. http://smartblogs.com/leadership/2011/07/20/how-much-feedback-is-too-much/ http://web.hbr.org/email/archive/managementtip.php?date=022610 http://youtu.be/wnojHbEBGqU