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December 13-19, 2023 FREE fwweekly.com

It’s a Whole Vibe

This trendy spot just south of TCU keeps it simple with a smallish menu and ample mixed drinks. S T O R Y A N D P H O T O S E D W A R D B R O W N

FEATURE As Texas goes backwards, move your feet to the polls — and to shows. BY ANTHONY MARIANI

EATS & DRINKS Gustatory greatness awaits at Gustos Burger Bar on Magnolia. BY C O DY N E AT H E RY

SCREEN Wonka’s star makes everything satisfying and delicious. BY KRISTIAN LIN

B Y

MUSIC Lola’s closing marks the end of an era and possibly the start of something much less epic. BY STEVE STEWARD

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DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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Volum e 1 9

N umber 34

D ecember 1 3-19, 2023

INSIDE

STAFF Anthony Mariani, Editor Lee Newquist, Publisher Bob Niehoff, General Manager Ryan Burger, Art Director Jim Erickson, Circulation Director Edward Brown, Staff Writer Emmy Smith, Proofreader Michael Newquist, Regional Sales Director

Move On

Jennifer Bovee, Marketing Director

It’s time to vote with our hearts — and our feet. By Anthony Mariani

Stacey Hammons, Senior Account Executive

Julie Strehl, Account Executive Tony Diaz, Account Executive Wyatt Newquist, Digital Coordinator Clintastic, Brand Ambassador

Couch Coaches By Buck D. Elliott

CONTRIBUTORS Christina Berger, E.R. Bills, Jason Brimmer, Juan Govea

Though TCU will watch the bowls from home, the team just hired a new DC.

By Cody Neathery

Laurie James, Kristian Lin, Cody Neathery, Wyatt Newquist, Steve Steward, Teri Webster,

Lola’s Lowdown

What will ever replace it?

Smash, Mouth

Gustos Burger Bar thrills and chills Magnolia.

Buck D. Elliott, Juan R. Govea, Patrick Higgins,

By Steve Steward

Ken Wheatcroft-Pardue, Cole Williams EDITORIAL

BOARD

Anthony Mariani, Edward Brown, Emmy Smith

Fort Worth Weekly mailing address:

Backpage . . . . . . . . 24

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15 Eats & Drinks 1 19 Eats & Drinks 2 21 Music 23 Classifieds

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

Feature Buck U Screen Shop Local ATE DAY8 a Week

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Cover photo by Edward Brown

4 9 11 12 13

300 Bailey, Ste 205, Fort Worth TX 76107

Moving our feet may be the only way to save Texas — and our sanity. B Y

A N T H O N Y

efore I moved to Texas from up north in the late 1990s, I genuinely thought there’d be horses on every street corner. All I really knew of Hee-Haw, U.S.A., was (in order): the Dallas Cowboys, the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, Dallas, and Dolly Parton, who’s from Tennessee. My knowledge of the state inversely matched the joy I felt at finally escaping the Rust Belt backwater where I’d been spending my 20s dying slowly on the inside from unemployment, boredom, and loneliness. Living at my sepulchral parents’ house in Pittsburgh, I woke up late every morning, watched cable TV by myself on the couch for hours with my finger up my nose, sometimes drove into town to fill out a job application or two, went to the gym twice a day (purely to be among other human beings, definitely not to work out), and dragged myself to the terrible bars and nightclubs every weekend out of obligation to appear “normal” and nonsuicidal. Repeat. All those good, healthy years — wasted. “It’s not you,” Pittsburgh whispered to me every night before I slipped from sobbing into dreamless sleep, “it’s me.” The old saying is true: I got to Texas as fast as I could. A few others have followed my trendsetting ways. More than 30 million people now call Texas home, making it second only to California in size. They come for the jobs, the decent weather, the lack of a state income tax, the flat prairieland, I guess, and the culture. Texas music, food, and fine art rival the best in the world’s aesthetically and also financially, having generated $6 billion statewide over the past decade. Clearly, there’s a lot to love about Tejas — and it’s even lovelier if you’re not a woman or any other kind of minority. Forcing birth even if it means infertility, disfigurement, or death; slashing LGBTQ rights; banning books; willingly pocketing blood money from the gun lobby; piecemeal ghettoizing public education to create elite schools for wealthy, white Christians only; disenfranchising voters of color; palling around with Nazis; turning the border into Squid Game; rejecting not only public opinion but common sense on nearly every issue — Texas, in a world full of hellholes like North Korea and Florida, is right up there with the worst of them. Our home on the range hasn’t always been this horrible and bleak. The sun once shone brightly on it, and it wasn’t that long ago. Some of us remember it, and some of

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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M A R I A N I

us like Progress Texas, MOVE Texas, Texas Appleseed, RAICES, Texas Gun Sense, Beto O’Rourke, who still persists, and Colin Allred and Roland Gutierrez, who both aim to unseat Sen. Ted “Cancun” Cruz next year, keep fighting the dread to bring back hope, to offer us sane Texans a return to freedom from the absurd dictums of white, wealthy, mostly male Christian Nationalists. And I am here for hope’s comeback. And left, right, or middle, you should be, too. You’re where it starts.

Regressive politics were far from my mind in 1999 when I piloted George, my red ’92 Geo Prizm (top speed: 64 mph), to Houston, where I resumed hacking it up as a writer after a good two or three years of working construction jobs for scratch when I was working at all. Remember: Lots of Regis & Kathie Lee, SportsCenter, and The Grind filled my waking hours back in the ’Burgh. Space City won me over instantly. The cool buildings, the cool music, the cool art, Mexican food! And I’m talking actual, real, bona fide, authentic Mexican food. Not the Chi-Chi’s that my 27-year-old yinzer self had been duped into thinking was legitimate southof-the-border cuisine. I was in love another way — the marketing girl at work I asked out to a moe. concert (lolz) is now my wife. And like D., almost everyone I partied with or looked sideways at in H-town/Get-down was progressive. Texas. Who knew it was so alright, alright, alright. I never could have imagined what it has now become. Texas certainly isn’t alright, alright, alright. It’s all right, all right, all right, and the data show that a lot of us have I-35 eyes longing to vamos. “People are leaving Texas over rising costs, partisan politics, and a sense of disenchantment,” Business Insider says, adding that more than 494,000 Texans split between 2021 and 2022. This mini exodus “could intensify as [the state’s] housing costs surge and the … political landscape becomes more polarized.” Packing up George the Prizm to flee my perpetually gray living hell up north, my yinzer friends unloaded all the expected “jokes” on me. “Bet they’d never seen an Italian cowboy before!” “Better work on your quick draw, pahdner!” “Have fun cow tippin’!” All that kind of inanity. I approached my new life in Houston with the sense that my American Dream may finally be starting and that my pals were wrong. I set out to prove that Texas wasn’t all guns, “churchies,” and twangy crap. Texas was gleaming, stunning skyscrapers and straight-talking thinkers and groundbreaking rockers and rappers and fierce painters, sculptors, and filmmakers, and there was occasionally a lake or river nearby and only a couple of horses. Screwston, as I said on calls to my boys back home (this was before cell phones, holy shit), was as cosmopolitan as any other metropolis in the world. And, in many ways, it and the entire state still are. The cultural scenes in every major Texas city continue buzzing, and some, like ours, are growing courtesy of our multitudes. As part of Texas’ population boom, Fort Worth drew the most new residents

Anthony Mariani

Not Waitin’ Around to Die

Via George the ’92 Geo Prizm, the yinzer author’s first, splendid stint in Texas was in H-town/ Get-down.

(48,542) between 2020 and 2023. Reflecting a statewide trend, most of them came from Mexico. Compared to whites, who make up 39.8% of all Texas residents, the U.S. Census Bureau found that Hispanics account for 40.2% of the state population. The diversity driven by them, Blacks (13.4%), and other people of color manifests itself in our culture delightfully and in our politics … delightfully-ish (because still for some unbearable reasons many ethnic minorities strive to be white-adjacent #gross). With the exception of Fort Worth, nearly every other sizable Texas city leans left. It’s why the legislators in Austin — majority Republican, majority wild-eyed with hate in their tiny, black hearts and spin-doctored scripture verses in their big, fat mouths — have criminalized bodily autonomy and are destroying voting. They don’t have any solutions, our state GOPers. None. Just full diaper loads over how people dress, who they love, and what they do with their own bodies, and it partly explains why so many creatives and progressives have I-35 eyes. Techies who piled into Austin from elsewhere during the pandemic are booking return flights. One Cali tech bro likened our state capital to a “watered-down” San Francisco or L.A., and he’s not wrong. Current and future physicians and other high-level health-care workers also keep deserting our once-exemplary republic. “The onslaught of health-care bans [is] driving nurses, medical students, and doctors out of Texas,” says The 19th, a nonprofit gender-policy news outlet. When I left the state my first and only time, it wasn’t because of politics or even a job. My soon-to-be-fiancée had always dreamed of living in New York City, and since I once spent a couple years there, we thought sure, what the heck. I donated George the Prizm to science (technical school), and D. and I loaded up a U-Haul towing her Aggiemaroon Frontier named Trey and decamped from Houston for the Big Apple. After D. and I were confronted only by glorified

closets to rent in Alphabet City, DUMBO, the Village, and a few other allegedly affordable Manhattan neighborhoods, we found a huge apartment for around the same price ($1,500/month!) in Bay Ridge. Our part of Brooklyn was as sleepy and about as traditionally New Yorkish (read: not at all) as where I had lived on my own earlier. Morningside Heights, like Bay Ridge, shut down promptly at 9:30 p.m. every night and didn’t even have the common decency to plant supermodels in every bar. Bay Ridge, which is where I think Tony Manero lived in Saturday Night Fever, might as well have been Hulen Bend or Meadowbrook. We survived. D. worked in marketing for a ballet company in Union Square, I officed nearby as an editor at a glossy architecture magazine, and we traveled to and from work every day together by subway. The ride was 45 minutes each way. It got dark at 4:30 p.m. every day. I had to wake up two hours early twice a week or more to sometimes dig out Trey the Frontier from beneath hillocks of snow to re-park him somewhere else in the neighborhood (often blocks away) so we didn’t get a ticket or get towed because of mf street sweepers. We didn’t socialize much because everyone we knew and/or liked lived on the island and we simply did not have the bandwidth to drag our weary, sleep- and sun-deprived bodies back onto that subway on the weekends. Then D. got laid off. We returned to Houston after only a year or so. We lived at her parents’ house in a planned community south of downtown. While she went back to work at our old company, I freelanced — wholly unsuccessfully. Walking 15 steps to log on to a desktop did not stop me from checking Hotmail 500 times a day for only one or two messages per week. (Like you, I was in much better shape back then.) D.’s folks did not charge us rent, and when her older brother also came to live with us (also rent-free), I have to admit that feeling like part of a nuclear family hit a sweet note in my life, especially during continued on page 5

continued from page 4

and after 9/11. For D. and me, Texas was our salvation, and it’s largely for nostalgia’s sake that we wouldn’t mind growing old here. Neither would millions of others. Along with the rest of the country, Fort Worth and Texas are getting older. The nation’s 65-plus population shot up by over a third since 2010, the Census Bureau says. “No other age group saw such a fast increase.” One of the country’s “most rapidly aging states,” the Census goes on, is Texas. As the number of Texans under 60 continues shrinking, the proportion of the state’s population over 60 grows. By 2030, more than 20% of Texas’ total population will be redeeming senior discounts at CVS. In Fort Worth, our burgeoning senior contingent now accounts for more than 10% of our total population, and the percentage of our total population over 65 will rise through 2040. One way our little slice of heaven is graying is through migration. Retirees are flocking to DFW from out of state for our urban cores and cultural scenes. And our moving sidewalks. Just kidding. It’s for our jobs. Not only are Texans aging en masse, they’re working longer. A recent report by SmartAsset shows that the largest senior workforces are in Dallas (1), Austin (3),

Houston (4), and Fort Worth (8). That’s four Texas cities in the Top 10 for older workers. Or maybe we should say “… for people over 65 who can’t afford to retire so they’re hogging jobs that could go to younger people whose cultural output generates billions of dollars in revenue for their state and respective cities.”

Andrea Bocelli performed in Dallas last week, and as D. and I sat in a nearly packed American Airlines Center and witnessed high art enrapture all these souls — most older than us but some younger — I had to remind myself repeatedly that I was in Texas, still the same Texas as I had imagined it as a sad, ignorant Pittsburgher in the ’90s but grown, mature, respectable. And that’s the thing about big money. Whether it comes from oil or gas or oil and gas doesn’t matter. No artist, architect, choreographer, whatever will say no to a fat paycheck, and through the work of Texas’ blue bloods of yesteryear, we can brag on our world-class arenas and our world-class museums, orchestras, and dance companies. Fine art in Texas is doing just fine. Local artists, not so much. Most of our independent musicians, painters, and other creatives can practice their crafts only after working two or sometimes three part-time jobs. We can’t reliably blame the institutions to which our artists aspire. Most of Texas’ marquee museums sponsor outreach programs for and employ

Anthony Mariani

Feature

As the thousands of Bocelli fans at the AAC last week proved, the fine arts in Texas are healthy. It’s the local independent scenes that are struggling.

lots of local creatives, and we can’t expect the Kimbell or the Modern or, musically speaking, Dickies or the AAC to devote tons of money to unknowns. Institutions do not

exist to break artists. That’s the job of us locavores, and we’re failing. Maybe instead of downloading the latest darling on KXT continued on page 6

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N OV 2 0 – J A N 7

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years of Donald Trump, a pandemic, corporate profiteering, and almost four more years of worrying about Donald Trump and his MAGA zombies, maybe our bandwidth is simply tapped. I know our patience is gone (I say as I wrap myself in another episode of Bake Off like a warm blanket woven by angels). While Fort Worth’s population has grown by 390,000 souls since the time of Experience the Art of Music, our independent cultural scene seems to be regressing, and besides our collective inertia, a likely culprit could be that local, occasionally leading artists have not only been leaving Fort Worth steadily — “So long, Maren Morris!” “See ya later, Jay Wilkinson!” — but putting the entire Lone Star State in the rearview.

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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or Pitchfork or staying home during gallery walks or buying art only from IKEA, we could, I dunno, read the local papers and download whoever they’re writing about or save the next episode of The Great British Bake Off for another night, put on our drinking shoes, say a blessing over our debit cards, call an Uber, and go out to have our minds melted. Bocelli’s still got it, hitting those high C’s with ease and holding notes longer than I can sit in a recliner on Sundays. At one part during the show, another Italian guy came onstage and painted a portrait of the singer on a giant canvas, immediately transporting me to the Wreck Room circa 2003. For real. There was a time in the Fort when the grassroots cultural scene began asserting itself, and one manifestation of that awakening was Experience the Art of Music. Dreamed up by two friends, a local painter and a singer-songwriter, the event at the legendary, long-defunct Fort Worth venue put bands onstage alongside painters. It was adorable. At the time, the Wreck was one of only a few spots (along with The Aardvark, The Moon, and the Ridglea Theater) for live, local, original, non-genre music. Fast-forward 20 years, and not much has changed. Like how there’s only a couple exhibition spaces for independent painters,

Cour tesy X

continued from page 5

sculptors, and other visual artists, even fewer spots exist for live, local, original, non-genre music with the recent closure of the largest, most popular, and most loyal platform for those kinds of sounds. Part of the reason Lola’s shuttered may have something to do with skyrocketing rent, an international problem fueled primarily by price gouging. Another, perhaps handier explanation is that we’ve all stopped going to concerts with any regularity. Enjoying local, original, non-genre music requires openness, a sense of abandon, and patience, sometimes a lot of patience, and after suffering through four

“The worst state to live and work” is Texas. A new CNBC report says the sixth-ranked state for business (yay) is also “the least welcoming to workers and their families” based on several quality-of-life criteria, including crime, discrimination, environmental quality, child care, and health care. The pinko-commie agitpropists’ Top 10 is rounded out by No. 2 Oklahoma followed by Louisiana, South Carolina, Alabama, Missouri, Indiana, Tennessee, Arkansas, and, finally, Florida. Louisiana, Arkansas, Alabama, and Oklahoma are also among the country’s poorest states. The one thing that unites them all is years of Republican leadership.

With their massive tax breaks, Gov. Greg Abbott and the rest of the cons in Austin bend over for Big Business at the cost of our quality of life. Texas ranks in the bottom half for K-12 education, is 13th worst for poverty, and, according to WalletHub, is the country’s third most dangerous state (48th in emergency preparedness, 43rd in personal/residential safety, and 50th in share of uninsured people). Whether for Civil War II or a trip to 7-Eleven after 8 p.m., looks like I’ll need a gun either way. Especially if I plan on spending any time near a K-12 campus — Texas lags behind only California in number of school shootings. As a straight, middle-aged white guy with a beard and tight T-shirts, I’m mostly insulated from change, gradual or sudden. As the father of a Black male sixth grader, I experience what’s happening today on a subatomic level. I feel it with every breath. The only way D. and I can raise him here long-term in good conscience is if hope comes back, and the only way it can is if sane people mobilize. My man Beto is doing his part. Through his PAC Powered by People, the former gubernatorial and senatorial Democratic candidate recently launched a new statewide voter outreach program, and the timing couldn’t be better. Ratings for congressional Republicans “have reached their lowest point yet,” he says, which, if you stop to think about it, may be expected in a state described by a former Texas GOP chairman as a “lean Republican” one, meaning not continued on page 7

Feature

all broke, but we were all also electrified by life! (And cocaine.) We are all older. We are more tired. We have more responsibilities. I also think many of us are sort of been-there/done-that about the scene (thanks, IBS and multiple DUIs) and perhaps even life in general. *raises hand* Which is fine. The Lifestyle is a young person’s game, always has been, and while we may not be old, we are no longer young. Look at me. Instead of rocking out to Zeppelin, BULLS, or Public Enemy, I listen to 175-year-old songs sung by a 65-year-old

This column reflects the opinions of the editorial board and not the Fort Worth Weekly. To submit a column, please email Editor Anthony Mariani at Anthony@FWWeekly. com. He will gently edit it for clarity and concision.

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DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

warble through an acoustic set or to gander at some abstract-expressionism. One of the hardest parts about leaving New York City was feeling as if D. and I had failed, as if somehow our best was not good enough. And that stink followed me throughout our early days in the Fort. I battled back by writing about every decent band and art exhibit I could find and by going out almost every night. Back in the early- to midaughts, Funkytown was always a party. That go-out-for-one-beer/come-home-at-4-a.m. meme started with us (probably). We were

blind Italian dude. Yes, nostalgia plays a part in that. Bocelli has always been a favorite around the house. When Romanza came out 25-plus years ago, you couldn’t come within 100 feet of my mom’s groundfloor efficiency back in the ’Burgh without hearing him belting out his brand of popera or “La donna è mobile” on repeat. That’s one reason we Marianis all love Bocelli. The other is: His music’s great, and D. and I have climbed to that age where we’re much closer — mentally and physically — to our elderly parents than we are to our children. Going to see Andrea was our first night out in months. It’s not necessarily that she and I don’t want to leave the house. We do. -Ish. But we’ve only recently been able to trust our 12-year-old to entertain himself for a bit and me not to get absolutely shit-hammered when I’m near beer. Last Thursday at the AAC was a sober-curious success. I see more nights out in our future — as long as we’re home by 11. I mean that. There’s no good reason local shows can’t start at 8 or earlier. Don’t make me wag my finger. I am not the open-minded, open-souled, patient guy I was back during Experience the Art of Music, and I don’t believe many of the folks I traveled with are either — if we are even here at all. l

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

solidly Republican at all. Now is a chance for Dems to flip the House. As it appears to be every single election, because the Democrats we put into office refuse to fight dirty like their counterparts across the aisle, democracy itself is on the 2024 ballot (see: bandwidth, lack thereof; see: patience, depleted). As the most recent presidential election proved, mobilizing Texans works. Of the state’s 17.7 million registered voters, 67% cast ballots in 2020, and Biden ended up losing the state by only 5 percentage points, a (sad) moral victory but a noticeable improvement upon the past. Mobilizing is key, but to begin moving our feet, we’ve first got to uncross them, get them off the coffee table, and put them on the floor. I’ve never knowingly heard a Taylor Swift song except the one where she repeats “shake it off ” like 50 times, but I love her. And, as her new billionaire status appears to indicate, I am not alone. And I can’t help but think that she and her numbers — along with endless streaming and scrolling coupled with almost wartime levels of stress — are poisoning us. This Lotusland of sequined leotards, hilarious memes, comfy blankets, and superheroes is not sustainable. We need to wake up. (Now would be a good time.) We need to move our feet even if it’s just down the street to watch one of our friends

Cour tesy The Guardian

continued from page 6

Jaune Quick-to-See Smith:

MEMORY MAP October 15, 2023–January 21, 2024

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Black Nativity

- a vibrant portrayal of the Nativity story, inspired by Langston Hughes and brought to life by a talented all-black cast with a thoughtfully curated selection of songs created specifically for the production that adds a unique and captivating dimension to this theatrical masterpiece.

NOVEMBER 24 TH - DECEMBER 23 RD

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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3925, 506 Main St, Fort Worth, TX 76102

MODERN ART MUSEUM OF FORT WORTH 3200 Darnell Street • Fort Worth, Texas 76107 • 817.738.9215

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This exhibition was organized by the Whitney Museum of American Art, New York. Pictured: Jaune Quick-toSee Smith, The Rancher, 2002. Acrylic and charcoal on canvas, 72 ¹/₄ × 48 ¹/₈ inches (183.5 × 122.2 cm). Hood Museum of Art, Dartmouth College, Hanover, New Hampshire; purchased through the William S. Rubin Fund 2005.13. © Jaune Quick-to-See-Smith. Photograph courtesy the Artist and Garth Greenan Gallery, New York

Box Office 817.338.4411 www.jubileetheatre.org tickets@JubileeTheatre.org

D .

E L L I O T T

This year wasn’t historically awful, but it was close. The last college team to appear in a National Championship and then ride their couches during bowl season was the 2010 Longhorns after losing to Alabama in the BCS National Championship game. The Horned Frogs are the first team in the playoff era to mediocre their way out of any bowl after riding last season’s rollercoaster to their Georgia beatdown and corresponding national disgrace. TCU softly flushed this season after surrendering 69 points to Oklahoma in Norman. Fans, pundits, and yours truly were eagerly expecting a press release the next day announcing that either offensive coordinator Kendal Briles or defensive coordinator Joe Gillespie had been dismissed. Instead, it took nearly two-and-a-half weeks to disclose that Gillespie’s 3-3-5 experiment had concluded. The results: It was neither good at stopping the run nor the pass, and when factoring for TCU’s comically low time of possession, the side effects were many lost games and even more heartbroken supporters. By the numbers, out of 133 Division I teams, the Frogs finished 80th in scoring defense, 10 spots better than last year’s 90th but without the three additional games against ranked teams factoring into the equation. In total defense, this year’s squad was 103rd in yards allowed, worse than last year’s 95th, even

S on e t ar

DECEMBER 16-17, 2023 SATURDAY 9am - 5pm

SUNDAY 10am - 4pm

Will Rogers Center

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3401 W. Lancaster Ave. Fort Worth, TX 76107

Admission: $10 214-635-2009 • lonestargunshows.com

hungry conference supporters an opportunity to feast their eyes on our new West-annex cohort and bid good riddance to the Sooners forever. The only other noteworthy game before 2024 is the Orange Bowl between Georgia and Florida State, two teams with a legitimate gripe that they were left out of the playoffs. This is an experiment in motivation, since neither team should have any — outside of convincing the playoff selection committee they’re idiots. Expect the Dawgs to roll. They’re the better team on paper and in reality, while FSU is simply an excellent defense trying to cover for an offense that will be even less capable than it was in November. Transparently, this year’s bowl slate sucks, but the playoffs are excellent. The afternoon Rose Bowl between Michigan and Alabama is a test of proven commodities. Michigan is the winningest college program ever, and the Crimson Tide have the most championships of any program currently competing in DI. The Wolverines, despite in-season controversy, are back-to-back conference champions and haven’t lost since this time last year against TCU, when everything that could have gone wrong for them did. Only Maryland and Ohio State finished within a possession of the Michiganders this season, and the Wolverine defense completely smothered eight of their opponents, allowing only 7 or fewer points each time while scoring consistently on offense with a run-first strategy.

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B U C K

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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Christmas came early for Frog fans hoping for big changes. Former Boise State head coach Andy Avalos will take over DC duties in Fort Worth.

Alabama, after starting their season with an L hosting the Longhorns, have been equally effective on both offense and defense and have managed their SEC schedule nicely without looking as dominant as days past but still beating most opponents comfortably. Michigan’s defense is the best unit on the field and line up well with the Tide’s big-play potential. Neither team is likely to eclipse 28 points in the contest, but expect the Wolverine defenders to emerge as the difference in a one-score contest that leaves all SEC teams watching the National Championship game from home for only the second time since the playoff was created in 2014. The evening Sugar Bowl between Texas and Washington is more intriguing because each team is less proven, despite the Huskies boasting an unbeaten record and the Longhorns winning in Tuscaloosa. Washington rosters the best quarterback in the playoffs, which is an important consideration, but UW claimed seven victories this season by one possession or fewer, routinely needing late-game heroics to eclipse good — but not great — opponents. The Huskies beat the Oregon Ducks, who I believe were largely overrated, twice and by only 3 each time. Texas has been no more reliable but more dominant regularly. They own a more signature win along with a clearly better defense. Quinn Ewers, despite his youth-group-leader makeover this season, is still less consistent than Michael Penix Jr. but still possesses greatgame potential. The Huskies’ receiving corps is better top to bottom, but Xavier Worthy of Texas might be the most explosive player in college football, as long as he’s had enough time to recover from an ankle injury suffered in the conference championship game. This game will be more fun to watch because neither team is as good as Michigan or Alabama, but I believe Texas’ defense will be the most significant phase and allow the Longhorns to claim a 34-28 victory, even if they fall cold for a quarter or more, which they have several times this season. If all goes according to my crystal ball — which I purchased at Scarborough Faire several years ago, thanks for asking — fans will be rewarded on January 8 with a rematch of the 2005 Rose Bowl. In the only previous meeting between the Wolverines and Longhorns, UT knocked in a walk-off field goal for a 1-point victory. If the two do meet for the second time, I believe Big Blue will grasp redemption along with their first National Championship trophy since 1997. l

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TCU hiring a new DC might be the height of bowl season.

Cour tesy Instagram

Home for the Holidays

without the conference championship and two playoff matchups. It doesn’t take a statistics professor or an invested football fanatic to recognize how poor(ous) the defense was both years. This season’s addition of Briles, who ran plays at an even faster rate — and less effectively — than predecessor Garrett Riley, amplified the deficiencies of a group who had been just squeaking by. Athletic Director Jeremiah Donati wasted no time in hiring Gillespie’s replacement on Monday. Recently dismissed Boise State head coach Andy Avalos will lead TCU’s defenders next season. A decorated linebacker on the blue turf, Avalos was the DC at Oregon for two seasons before becoming head of his alma mater for the last three. For comparison, Avalos’ defenses have ranked in the Top 15 in scoring prevention three times in the last five seasons, so it’s safe to assume the transition at least has the foundation as an upgrade. If you’re still craving college football in 2023, even if it’s out of spite, there are a few bowls you should check out before the playoffs commence. The first matchup involving a Texas team is Saturday in Shreveport when Tech takes on Cal. The Red Raiders and Head Coach Joey McGuire need a boost after backing into a bowl — thanks mostly to their victory over TCU — after they were picked by some to be a contender for the conference crown. How they perform against the lackluster Golden Bears could have a direct impact on whether next season is make or break for McGuire. Across a somewhat barren slate is A&M against Oklahoma State in the Texas Bowl two days after Christmas. The most recognition the Ags have received recently is how much they’re willing to pay someone not to coach, but both the Aggies and the Cowboys represent a fascinating local-ish battle of former Southwest Conference and Big 12 enemies, both little brothers to more prestigious programs in their own state — though, to be fair, Oklahoma A&M (which is what they used to be called) actually wins sometimes. The Aggies won’t have their new coach, former Blue Devil (and Aggie DC) Mike Elko, but an interim status will make for exciting albeit disjointed football against the Pokes, who started off in a tailspin, rose to a possible championship appearance, and then fell flat when they had a chance to ruin UT’s season. The Valero Alamo Bowl airing the next day is not necessarily an interesting matchup, but Arizona versus Oklahoma represents incoming versus outgoing Big 12. It will provide

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K R I S T I A N

L I N

What does it mean that all the actors who have played Willy Wonka on screen have been Americans? You might not have tabbed Timothée Chalamet as the latest one after seeing Dune, but any 30 seconds of his sly, bright, high-keyed performance in Wonka will show you how right he is for the role. As for the movie he’s in, which serves as a prequel to the Roald Dahl stories about the fabled candyman, it doesn’t always work, but Chalamet is more than good enough to carry it through its wobblier patches. The story begins with Willy arriving in some city that’s a mashup of London,

On an ongoing basis, we will be publishing Shawna’s answers to your questions. (Think: Dear Abby.) To that end, here is our next Q&A. Question: How do dogs’ eyes work? Can they see color or see in the dark? Do they get blinded by bright lights? Answer: Thanks FUR the great questions! I can SEE why you’d ask them (#DogMomHumor). For the answers, I had to consult with the experts. On the question of color, dogs possess only two types of cones and can only discern blue and yellow. This limited color perception is called dichromatic vision. Humans may have more cones, allowing us to see more colors and see them brighter than dogs do, but dogs have more rods, giving them the edge when it comes to seeing in low light or identifying moving objects. As for night vision, the answer is as clear as day — or, in terms of dog vision, as clear as night. Yes, dogs can definitely see at night, as the unique structure of their eyes makes it possible to see in settings with dim light or other low-light conditions. Dogs are actually better able to see in low light compared to their human owners. Yes, dogs are sensitive to bright light. Just as it happens in humans, a certain degree of sunlight / bright light sensitivity is normal considering the intense amount of light emanating from the sun and or extra bright lights.

Cour tesy Warner Bros. Pictures

Readers, do you have questions of your own? Please email CritterCorner@FWWeekly.com.

A tree with a chocolate trunk and oversized cherries growing in a candy store provides the stage for a Timothée Chalamet number in Wonka.

ShawsPawsPetCare.com 817-296-1769 (call/text)

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Shawna has been caring for their own (and other people’s) fur kids for more than 14 years. Her Fort Wo r t h - b a s e d business offers doggie daycare, daily walks, overnight boarding, and wellness checks. Translation: She’s seen it all.

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

The Wonka prequel serves up your dose of Christmas candy.

Promotional Feature

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Hot Chocolate

Paris, and Vienna to make his fortune as a chocolatier. He gets off to a rocky start, as he’s turned into an indentured servant by a crooked landlady (Olivia Colman) and frozen out of the sweets industry by a cartel of evil candymakers (Paterson Joseph, Mathew Baynton, and Matt Lucas). The cartel enforces their monopoly by bribing the chief of police (Keegan-Michael Key) with chocolate, and as the movie goes on, the top cop grows heavier and heavier. Wonka is undeterred, and with the help of a cute kid (Calah Lane) and their fellow servants, he plans to open his own shop and show the world who’s the best chocolate man in town. This is in the hands of Paul King, who’s best known for helming the Paddington movies. He may not bring the craftsmanship that Tim Burton did to his version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, but he does bring a lightness of touch that fits the material. The subplot with Wonka trying to honor the memory of his late mother (Sally Hawkins) works upon the main plot without becoming intolerable. The biggest potential pitfall here is the Oompa-Loompa (Hugh Grant) who follows Wonka around and steals his chocolate. Turns out the 8-inch-tall orange fellow is only taking back what belongs to his

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SCREEN

Wonka Starring Timothée Chalamet and Calah Lane. Directed by Paul King. Written by Simon Farnaby and Paul King. Rated PG.

people, since Willy harvested the last cacao beans in Loompaland without considering the natives. The Oompa-Loompas are such problematic creations on so many levels, and this is as dexterous a handling of them as I could have reasonably expected. If none of the supporting players here delivers as memorable a performance as Grant did in Paddington 2, the film does have enough comic scenes to keep it going, like when Willy delivers a bonbon to a security guard (Simon Farnaby, who also co-wrote the script here) and then watches the guy become progressively bombed because the little piece of chocolate contains so much alcohol. Songwriters King, Farnaby, and Neil Hannon come up with an impressive number of rhymes for the word “chocolate.” Their original songs are mostly pleasant, but at one point they do better than that. It’s when Wonka finally opens his own chocolate shop and welcomes in his first customers by dancing down a ruby chocolate walkway lined with blooming chocolate flowers and singing “A World of Your Own.” This is where the elements in the film — Nathan Crowley’s production design, Chung Chung-hoon’s photography, the music, King’s direction, and Chalamet’s performance — all come together and create something truly wonderful. This movie retains two of the Leslie Bricusse/ Anthony Newley songs from the 1971 movie, and Chalamet’s ringing rendition of “Pure Imagination” over the film’s ending is so great that it makes that tediously overexposed song sound newly uplifting. It’s when the movie sings, and when the star is singing, that Wonka feels worthy of a golden ticket. l

Christmas Past is Christmas Present Benbrook

Antique Mall

Tired of the same boring retailers & generic merchandise?

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Create MAGIC this Christmas with unique gifts & holiday decor that you won’t find

ANYWHERE ELSE! Shop Small Business! Shop Local!

SHOP BAM!

Open seven days a week! 10am - 6pm Mon - Sat | Noon - 6pm Sun LIKE US ON FACEBOOK!

Call us! 817.249.0844 9250 Benbrook Blvd., Benbrook 76126

Layaway Available!

Cour tesy Facebook

Chamas do Brazil Steakhouse offers a special Christmas Eve Dinner and a gift card promotion.

4.) My favorite Tex-Mex joint, Pappasito’s Cantina, has a gift card offer at all area locations. Buy $50 in gift cards now thru Sun, Dec 31, and receive a $10 rewards card that you can use Mon, Jan 1, thru Thu, Feb 29. Order online at Pappasitos.com, then pick up in person at your location. For bulk gift card purchases of over $1,000 or more than 50 cards, please call 1-877-277-2748.

5.) Now thru Tue, Jan 2, spend $100 or more on gift card purchases to P.F. Chang’s and receive one $25 bonus card for yourself. This offer is online only and is limited to one reward per day per customer. The gift cards are valid for all area locations. Oder at PFChangs.com/gift-cards.

7.) Treat yourself or a loved one to some cookies and have fun at the same time. Going beyond a basic cookie exchange, Tanstaafl Pub (409 N Bowen Rd, Arlington, 817-460-9506) hosts its first Sweets Swap 4pm Sun, Dec 10. Bring any kind of sweet treat you like, including brownies, candies, cookies, cupcakes, and more. Treats must be homemade. Along with three dozen or more treats, also bring printouts of the recipe to share. Christmas attire is encouraged. 8.) How about a chance to win big in the gift basket department? The popular Facebook group Fort Worth Foodies (@FortWorthFoodiesTX) is having contests throughout the month. Overstuffed (i.e., generous) gift baskets will be awarded weekly. Now thru Saturday is the first (and easiest) week. According to the contest post, here are the rules: Visit at least three restaurants this week and spend at least $25 before tax and tip, save your receipt, and when you have at least three receipts from restaurants in Fort Worth, please take photos of them and send via messenger. Each additional receipt will count as one extra entry into the gift basket that will be gifted to the lucky winner randomly drawn. Entries must be submitted by noon Sun, Dec 20.

By Jennifer Bovee

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6.) Old Texas Brewing Company has a similar offer. Purchase a $100 gift card and receive an additional $25 gift card for free. Valid at Fort Worth (6333 Camp Bowie Blvd, 817-386-0752) and Burleson (112 W Ellison St, 817-447-2337) locations. More info at OldTexasBrewing.com.

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

2.) Now thru Christmas Day (Mon, Dec 25), Flix Brewhouse (416 N Hwy 287, Mansfield, 682-977-8001) would like to reward you for your gift-giving efforts with a complimentary 2024 movie ticket for every $25 gift card purchased. Along with screening first-run and classic films, this new theater serves great food, cocktails, and craft beer brewed in-house. Check things out for yourself during 25 Days of Flixmas, when Flix shows a different classic holiday movie every day of December. With admission to each Flixmas show, you’ll receive a scratch-off ticket for a chance to win special prizes, including free movies for a year. Reserve seats at FlixBrewhouse.com/Events/ Flix-Picks. 3.) Treat your loved ones to a $50 gift card to Ol South Pancake House, and they will receive a credit for $10 on the same card for a total of $60. This offer is available for in-person pickup at Fort Worth (1509 S University Dr, 817-336-0311, open 24/7) and Burleson (225 E Renfro St, 817-989-9090, 6am-10pm). Order online at OlSouthPancakeHouse.com/Order.

Ol’ South has gift items and a deal on gift cards, too.

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1.) Chamas do Brazil Steakhouse (4606 S Cooper St, Arlington, 817- 375-0250) offers a Christmas Eve Special. Dine for $39.99 per person from the lunch menu (noon-3pm) or dinner (3pm-9pm) on Sun, Dec 24. The steakhouse will be closed on Christmas Day. Also, there’s an in-store Gift Card Special: a voucher for $20 off dinner or $10 off lunch/ brunch when you purchase a gift card. One complimentary deal per purchase. (If the gift card you purchase is at least $200, your voucher values increase to $52.99 off dinner and $29.99 off lunch/brunch.) Only gift card purchases made by Sun, Dec 31, qualify. More info at ChamasdoBrazil.com.

Cour tesy Facebook

North Texas has a lot to offer this season, including gift cards and ideas for foodies. Here are the Top 8 for the season(ing). Yes, I’ve got jokes.

Hot Deals At Cool Prices

Stock your Kitchen at Mission! Small wares, pots & pans, and all kitchen essentials available to the public. Come see our showrooms! MON-FRI 8am-5:30pm

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2524 White Settlement Road Fort Worth • 817-265-3973

Happy Hour at the Kimbell Café Fridays, 5–7 pm Enjoy live music and a selection of beverages and snacks available for purchase. Members receive a 10% discount on beverages during happy hours.

3333 Camp Bowie Boulevard, Fort Worth, Texas kimbellart.org | 817-332-8451

EATS & drinks Go for the Gustos

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With enormous, mouthwatering smash-burgers, a friendly vibe, and cold, frosty adult beverages, Gustos Burger Bar appears poised to make a long run. And

one dining room wall, lending organization to the avant-garde-style interior. In these dark and cozy environs, busts of Elvis still maintain watch from the fireplace mantle, holdovers from the previous tenant. It’s loose, warm, and fun, and I suspect more eclectic touches to come. Like the dinnerware, the menu is paper. And simple. But let’s not kid around. You’re here for the smash burgers. Served small, medium, as a shareable large, or as sliders,

the burgers feature tender, succulent, juicy, lightly crisped meat, with enough salt, pepper, and a touch of magic to stand out. My guest and I went with a couple sliders. With homemade salsa and grilled jalapenos plus bacon, ketchup, mayo, and zingy Best Maid pickles, the Sweet Heat briefly ignited the palate before pulling back on the reins of fire. The Gustos Burger was a messy, upscale version of a cheeseburger with continued on page 17

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S T O R Y A N D P H O T O S C O D Y N E A T H E R Y

that’s saying something because it sits in the tiny bungalow on Magnolia where three different restaurants — The Radler, Magnolia Tree Tavern, and The Bearded Lady — closed over the past few years. With all due respect to the Lady, whose burgers reside in a class all their own, none of the bungalow’s former inhabitants offered Gustos’ brand of fantastic, belly-busting smash burgers. Inside is just as delightful. A paper sign announcing “Gustos” is duct-taped on

Nuggs, not drugs.

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

Gustos Burger Bar, 1229 7th Av, FW. Noon-midnight Sun, 3pm-2am Thu-Sat.

Served in various sizes or as sliders, Gustos’ burgers feature tender, succulent, juicy, lightly crisped meat.

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That cozy little bungalow on Magnolia is now home to some gargantuan, tasty burgers and cold brews.

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DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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kiss that married the salty pork, gooey cheese, and fiery jalapeno. You also have four types of potatoes to choose from: simple fries or tots dressed in various ways. Topped with a lava-like layer of cheese, piquant caramelized onions, and more of that zingy signature sauce, the Gustos-Style Fries were splendidly sloppy and tasty but could have used a dusting of seasoning. While the kitchen closes at midnight,

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melty American cheese, caramelized onions, pickles, and a dallop of Gustos Sauce, which is kind of like Thousand Island dressing, all served on a fluffy, buttery toasted bun. If you’re allergic to meat, Gustos serves an It Is Possible burger with Impossible patties plus vegan chipotle aioli.

Is this burger bar family friendly? Why, yes. Gustos also offers Chicken Nuggs, which are more like tenders, and there’s also a chicken sandwich on the menu. My guest and I also ordered the only starter we could find. A spicy punch in the mouth, the bacon-wrapped jalapeno poppers benefited greatly from the sizzling strips wrapping the peppers stuffed with an inviting burst of cream cheese. The salted brown-sugar/honey-butter glaze was a chef ’s

Gustos’ bar stays open ’til 2am, making it an ideal spot for some killer burgers and quality hangs. l Gustos Burger Bar Gusto Burger sliders .................................. $13.99 Sweet Heat sliders ..................................... $14.99 Chicken Nuggs ........................................... $10 Gusto-Style Fries ........................................ $7.99 Jalapeno Poppers ....................................... $12

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Eats & Drinks

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

Who’s the real Burger King?

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Gustos’ bacon-wrapped jalapeno poppers are a spicy punch in the mouth.

Lunch Special M–F 11am–2pm

Tuk Tuk Thai

Thai Street Food Food to go & Catering

BYOB

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Free Delivery Limited Area & Minimum $20

3431 W 7th St • Fort Worth, TX 76107

817.332.3339

EATS & drinks It’s a Whole Vibe This trendy spot just south of TCU keeps it simple with a smallish menu and ample mixed drinks.

Fried chicken, queso, and pico de gallo make for a tasty and filling taco experience.

Vibe Taco, 3201 S University Dr, FW. 817-7108828. 4pm-10pm Tue-Wed, 4pm-midnight Thu-Sat. B Y

and sour mix) had a strong peachy scent. Every sip was a lovely blend of whiskey and melon flavors. The tacos, all served on lightly charred flour tortillas, did not disappoint. The chicken in the fajita taco was juicy and lightly spiced, and the smatterings of diced onions and cilantro were fresh and zesty. The brisket taco, beefy and tender, put the generous mound of meat front and center with only bits of onion and cilantro as garnish. The LV (Los Vaqueros) beef taco pays homage to the popular local Tex-Mex chain famed for its slow-cooked beef stew. The same lovely beefy soup is the centerpiece of

The brisket and fajita chicken tacos, packed with juicy meat and garnished with fresh cilantro and onions, are neither overly garnished nor overly filling.

this taco, and the richly flavored ensemble works surprisingly well. The real treat during my visit was the Saw’d Off Taco. Two breaded and fried chicken tenders came covered with thick queso and pico de gallo. The mix of juicy poultry, spicy pico, and creamy cheese was a trifecta of complementary flavors. The restaurant offers several appetizers, including mac ’n’ cheese bites. These 10 dense, golden-fried nuggets came out steaming hot. Crispy on the outside and filled with gooey American cheese and elbow macaroni, the nugs benefited from dunks in the accompanying side of ranch dressing. The Hurricane Fries could easily feed two. The mound of lightly seasoned tots were covered in melted cheddar cheese, and topping the hot, gooey mess were generous chunks of tender brisket and freshly diced cilantro, onions, and tomato, which made for a lively and filling app. Apparently, Vibe Taco takes on a party vibe in the evenings as TCU students descend, but I wasn’t going to stick around to find out. I got what I was looking for — scrumptious tacos — so I was happy to leave the margarita towers for the young folks. l Vibe Taco TX brisket taco ........................................... $3.75 Chicken fajita taco .................................... $3.75 LV beef taco ................................................ $3.75 Saw’d Off taco ............................................ $3.99 Mac ’n’ cheese bites .................................. $8 Hurricane Fries ........................................... $13 Green Tea shot ........................................... $6

Vibe’s mac ’n’ cheese bites are crispy on the outside and gooey within.

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The Hurricane Fries are delicious — and plentiful.

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

Anyone who frequents the TCU area has probably seen Vibe Taco, the nearly 2-yearold restaurant located off University Drive just north of Bluebonnet Circle. On a recent visit, parking at the adjacent garage was a breeze. The space was surprisingly empty. “Everyone is preparing for finals,” the waiter told me, adding that Vibe would be packed by the evening with undergrads looking to unwind in the company of margaritas, mixed drinks, and shots. The single large room with a large bar at the back plus long rows of tall tables and a few arcade games in the corner is primed to appease Horned Frogs. The bar menu features cocktails, bottled and draft beers, and pitchers and towers of margaritas, seltzers, and several shots. I sprung for a shot of Green Tea, which arrived as a generous pour of Irish whiskey with peach schnapps. The greenish liquor (likely colored by a sweet

One of several shots on the drink menu, Vibe’s Green Tea is smooth and fruity.

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RIDGLE A LOUNGE

FRI 12/29 LUCYLUVSFUR

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What’s really sad to me about Lola’s closing is that I more or less wrote this column once before. In May 2022 (“R.I.P., 3726 W 6th St”), Lola’s was wrapping up its tenancy at its previous location as the Trailer Park and Saloon, a wonderful spot that in a kind of insult became home to a pastel-colored sports bar called Birdie’s. “I had a moment a couple weeks ago,” I wrote, “standing on that deck in the northeast corner of Lola’s Trailer Park, when I concluded that Fort Worth is a lot less fun than it used to be.” Roughly 18 months have passed since then, and now, this city is even less fun, with Lola’s making its closure official via social media yesterday. After 16 years in two different locations as Lola’s — Trailer Park/ Saloon on West 6th Street near the Cultural District and Lola’s Fort Worth on West Berry Street near TCU — the business was shuttering. The news followed Twilite Lounge’s equally dismaying announcement last week of its own closure, and in both instances, the reactions of those venues’ many fans and regulars were a mix of heartfelt sympathy, grateful tributes, and variations of “Why can’t this city keep music venues open?” To that last part, I hope you know that it is not the responsibility of any city to keep music venues open, and if you posted a comment ascribing blame for the venues’ shuttering to the literal municipal government that is the City of Fort Worth, Texas, I appreciate your anguish, but, please, stop posting stuff like that. Municipalities are not liable for the survival of rock ’n’ roll clubs. The people who live in a city are. To every person lamenting the loss of Lola’s and Twilite, I have to ask: When was the last time you spent money at those venues? Because people spending money at a club is literally what pays the club’s bills, not the city government and certainly not

in the wake of all this was something to the effect of “If I’d known last Wednesday was going to be the last show, I would’ve gone!” To which I have to ask: Would you have, really? What kept you elsewhere all the nights when you thought Lola’s was still open? There are a million reasons for the absence of the people who would have gone to Lola’s if only they’d known it was the bar’s last hurrah, which, in this case, was Big Mike’s Box of Rock a few nights ago. I wasn’t there, for example, and my No. 1 reason is that I work every Wednesday night at a different bar. But even if I didn’t have a long-standing commitment to show up to my job when I am scheduled to, I probably would have stayed home. I am a middle-aged man, and the health of my body and personal finances — both of which I ignored for the better part of a couple decades because spending time and cash at Lola’s and other local venues was imminently more meaningful to me than not doing those things — are two factors that take precedence over a lot of other activities these days. Multiply me by everyone else like me, and our failure to show up at shows takes a toll. And for a fuller picture, add to this toll a generational shift away from young people engaging with live, local, original music, as well as most of this less-engaged generational cohort having even fewer dollars to spend than people of their age in previous cohorts, plus expecting that cohort to spend money in an economy where everything costs more and where property owners live for the dream of flipping property for even more money are far more important than the hundreds of lives and incomes that music venues positively impact, and that total cost is incredibly difficult for any venue to bear. Naturally, the economics of a music scene are also just as incredibly difficult for consumers to bear. I’ve read enough gripes about how live music only happens where alcohol is sold, how such places are unappealing to people with tight budgets and/or booze-free lifestyles. It certainly does cost

offerings, stays open late, and also hosts live music, I can only guess how long such a place might remain open. If such a place existed, I would be shocked if it did so for longer than four months, let alone 16 years. It is undeniable that there is a dearth in Fort Worth of third spaces where people can hang out until midnight or later that don’t cost any money or revolve around alcohol consumption — I mean, you can’t even go to the Botanic Garden for free anymore during the day, let alone for any event that happens at night there. There are no late-night coffeeshops, few late-night restaurants, and certainly no gathering spaces outside someone’s personal dwelling where you can just sit around with your friends until 2 a.m. without spending any money. Sorry to say, but there are no bands at the Denny’s on Hulen onstage yelling, “What the fuck is up?!” Also, nothing is free in a live music scene because venues have to pay bills, and it doesn’t matter if they sell beer, coffee, or bottled water sourced from the Ever-Flowing Fountain of Youth. Unless the people opening a venue (or juice bar, or coffee bar, or kratom bar, or oxygen bar, or whatever other bar adequately meets the tastes of the people dissatisfied with bar-bars) also own the building that houses it, they are at the mercy of a landlord. What landlords truly care about the business paying them rent? If they did, wouldn’t rents be lower? Would commercial symbiosis between businesses and landlords be an actual thing then? Probably not. Property owners, no matter how benevolent, are ultimately only real friends with their bottom lines. If one business can’t hack a steep rent increase (“Sorry, bud, market rent is market rent”), there is inevitably another aspirant who will fill that space when the previous occupant goes under. Rinse, wash, repeat until your city is nothing but a bunch of FOR LEASE signs. Why would this be different for a venue that doesn’t expect its patrons to spend money? Perhaps some hypothetical someone could

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A 20-plus-year Fort Worth musician says the venue’s Now with Lola’s gone, is it appropriate to ask if the scene will ever recover? closing marks the end of anyone’s personal nightlife aspirations that money to go out, but this is true whether you an era and possibly the culminate in Facebook comments such go to a place that sells beer and liquor or some as “We almost went to that show!” I don’t hypothetical, platonically ideal juice bar/ beginning of something mean to shame anyone for how they express coffee bar/kratom bar. Lacking evidence of a their grief, but one of the most frustrating successful “third space” in this city for which much less epic. — if well-intentioned — comments I’ve read the bulk of sales come from nonalcoholic

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

Goodbye, Lola’s

Juan Govea

MUSIC

open a nonprofit event space that caters to an alcohol- and commerce-ambivalent clientele, but if you think this is a sustainable solution or, even more imaginatively, an easy, if-you-build-it-they-will-come sort of endeavor, find a person who ran 1919 Hemphill and see what they think about that business model. Or, better yet, put your own ass in the wind and see how your own money fares opening that kind of space. I possess neither the money nor the imagination for a spot like that, but even if I did, unless I owned the property, this fictitious not-for-profit venue is fucked as soon as the property owner is able to sell it to someone who wants to build more apartments. What will happen to the space where Lola’s came to an end is up to whoever owns it — anything can be leveled and rebuilt into five stories of multi-family dwellings that few families can actually afford, but some real estate player will inevitably pitch it to someone with big-enough dreams, standing up another proverbial entrepreneurial domino to fall down. Sadly, Lola’s follows the demises of the Americado Food Hall (2019), the Moon Bar (2020), and the Berry Street Ice House (2021) at 2000 W. Berry St. What I, as an ignoramus who does not know anything about commercial real estate, cannot help but wonder is: What is the common denominator among four businesses that couldn’t make it work at that spot? In my ignorance, all I can think of is who has owned the property all this time. Has it not been the same owner? What does that person have to do with these businesses’ failures? I doubt I will know the real story. I guess it doesn’t really matter if the end is still “Dang, sucks that they had to close.” I loved Lola’s. Oh, sure. I loved it a lot more when it was on 6th Street, but that was a different time for me, and I was glad that their move to Berry furthered the continuity of a music scene I’ve been a part of for over 20 years. I was even more glad to see it hang in there on Berry Street for as long as it did. I went when I could, I played there one time, and I’m grateful to have had those experiences. But Lola’s was more than its locations. I am reluctant to spout my own torrents of “I was there for X and Y show and played there in S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z bands,” because pretty much anyone in Fort Worth who enjoys live music and/or plays or used to play in a live band already told that story on Facebook in the hours after the bar’s farewell dispatch. But, yeah, I was there, too, playing on its stages and watching my friends do the same and, even for four months in 2011, serving drinks from behind its bars. And in all of those capacities, I felt like I was part of a not-so-secret Fort Worth rock ’n’ roll society, a wheels-off extended family that was a distinctive pillar of Fort Worth culture. Lola’s was the locus of a prominent sector or Fort Worth’s music scene, a bridge between the wild-ass days of the early 2000s and whatever happens next, and its fate marks the true end of that era. I miss it already. Nothing lasts forever, but it’s still tough to say goodbye at the end. Thanks, Brian, Josie, et al for giving us a home all this time. We wouldn’t have had a scene without y’all and your bar, because Lola’s really did make living in Fort Worth a pretty good time. l 21

FO R T WO R T H W E E K LY

DECEMBER 13-19, 2023

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EMPLOYMENT- General

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