FW January 2022

January 2022

Atrium Wake Forest Baptist

Best Asian Restaurant & Runners Up Sushi 2020

WEEKLY DRINK SPECIALS

HakkaChow

Tuesday all moscow mule cocktails $3 off Wednesday all mojito cocktails $3 off Thursday half price wine by the glass

Friday & Saturday bottled beer $1.50 off and draft beer $2 off Sunday mimosas and bloody marys $5 half price flavored sake by the glass

Best Sushi Runner Up Winner Best Asian

NEW:

Biggest Sake Selection in the Triad.

More than 20 different Sake available.

CLOSED ON MONDAYS

(336) 893-8178 | hakka-chow.com 615 Saint George Sq Ct | Winston-Salem, NC 27103 (Right off Hanes Mall Blvd. across from the Wynnsong 12 Movie Theater)

Monday Closed Tuesday -Thursday 11:30am - 9:30pm Friday 11:30am - 10pm Saturday 12pm - 10pm Sunday 12pm - 9pm

Here if you need us, but hoping that you won’t.

Be careful out there.

Pat’s Body Shop / Scarlette

COLLISION, DETAILING, INTERIOR, MECHANICAL, TOWING, UPGRADES & PERFORMANCE

Gift Certificates Available

336-945-3767 336 946-9007 336-999-3000 performance parts divison

TOWING

5720 Country Club Road Winston-Salem, NC 27104 Monday - Friday 8:00am - 5:30pm

5730 Country Club Rd Winston-Salem

336-955-3099 The Carolina’s Performance Headquarters

4961 S Main Street, Winston-Salem Monday - Friday 8:00am - 5:30pm

GOLDMAN CENTER for Facial Plastic Surgery Facial Rejuvenation Minimally Invasive Surgery Skin Rejuvenation & Fractional Laser Therapy Fillers & Injectables Aesthetic & Functional NasalGoldman Surgery Center Hair Restoration Surgery

With Offices Serving the Piedmont & the High Country 108 Dornach Way | Advance, NC (336) 245-9595 Kinderton Village – across from Bermuda Run

717 Greenway Road | Suite A | Boone, NC (828) 278-9230 NEAL D. GOLDMAN, MD Double Board Certified Facial Plastic Surgeon

FacialPlasticSurgeryNC.com

Budget Blinds

Piedmont Federal Savings Bank

PUBLISHER Brooke Eagle Brooke@ForsythMags.com

The Publisher Perspective

EDITOR

I love this quote and feel that it can apply to many things in life, from your career to your relationships.

Every year I like to choose a word of the year. Last year, my word was permission. This year, my word is passion.

I read a fascinating article recently about passion. The original (Latin) concept of the word was “to suffer” or to be interwoven with suffering. How does this relate to the word passion in 2022? When you are passionate about something, it doesn’t mean that it’s always amazing, fun or perfect. You may not even always like doing it, but it matters to you. It matters so deeply to you that you are willing to suffer for it.

One example? Working out! Or for me specifically, CrossFit. I am passionate about CrossFit and what it does for my mental and physical health. I love it. Some days I can hardly wait to get to the gym! Other days, it’s all I can do to get off the couch and even when I get to the gym, I’m not into it. This doesn’t mean I’m not passionate about it. It means my motivation and my energy goes up and down. Regardless of my current level of motivation, my passion to learn new skills and maintain an active lifestyle overrides. We aren’t robots, we’re human! We can’t stay 100% excited about anything in life 100% of the time.

The same can be said for this magazine. I am incredibly passionate about Forsyth Woman (as is my mom, Keela who started this publication over 16 years ago). However, we have our tough days! Don’t we all? But even on the toughest of days, quitting or giving up never crosses my mind. We can’t expect to have that happiness and excitement all of the time when it comes to what we are passionate about. Your passion(s) will cause you a bit of suffering now and then. Your passions are worth a bit of suffering now and then. Soak it in! Enjoy the suck! The bad days make the great days even more enjoyable.

Why is this important? Passion is strongly correlated to purpose. And finding your purpose, in my opinion, is directly correlated to feeling fulfilled in life.

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Tamara Bodford

Ok, enough about passion! On to what you can expect to find in the January issue! I’m thrilled that you chose to pick up this issue of Forsyth Woman. Truly, it means the world to me and to our entire team.

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kristi Marion Heather Spivey

ADVERTISING

If you haven’t yet, please save the date for Monday, March 28th! Forsyth Woman is hosting our first ever Women on the Move conference at the gorgeous WinMock at Kinderton! What can you expect from this all-day event? Expect to meet amazing like-minded women, experience growth both professionally and personally, and have a ton of fun.

This event is going to be one you won’t want to miss!

You can read all about the event and find the link to purchase your tickets on page 90. Don’t wait too long to snag your ticket(s) as they are limited and won’t last long.

Advertising @ForsythMags.com

In the meantime, I hope you’ll join us for our first Girls’ Night Out event of 2022 on Wednesday, January 5th at Davie Tavern! Learn more on page 15. We have some awesome GNO events lined up for the year already—you can stay in-the-know by subscribing to our newsletter (head to forsythwoman. com, scroll to the bottom of our homepage and enter your email address) and by following us on Instagram and Facebook @forsythmags! If you are interested in learning how your restaurant can host a Girls’ Night Out event, please reach out! You can email me at brooke@forsythmags.com for more information.

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Vonda Henderson

BACK OFFICE & VIRTUAL ASSISTANT The Office Nerd, Denise Heidel

COVER PHOTOGRAPHER Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist, Photography

JEJ Photos Jodie Brim Creative Photo Artistry by Melinda *others credited throughout accordingly

CONTENT EDITORS Kim Beane Meghan Corbett (Assistant)

SENIOR STAFF WRITERS Denise Heidel Carolyn Peterson

A huge congratulations to Jeff Smith, Founder of Smitty’s Notes, who is celebrating 25 years in business this year! Wow! What a milestone. Jeff has been such a blessing in connecting the WinstonSalem community; I encourage you to read all about his journey on page 48.

OTHER CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Debbie Barr Jen Brown Genevieve Condon Karen Cooper Candice Deal Martie Emory Amy Hill Taryn Jerez Jean Marie Johnson Debbie Lanier Debbie Linville Tabatha Renegar Susan Schabacker Lauren Sephton Megan Taylor *others credited throughout accordingly

Wishing you a happy and healthy 2022!

All my best,

Brooke Eagle, Publisher

Follow @forsythmags on instagram

GRAPHIC DESIGN & PRODUCTION PHOTO BY JODIE BRIM CREATIVE

hen you act out of passion you will find your way. When you act out of obligation, you will lose it.

– Dr. Shefali

Keela Johnson Keela@ForsythMags.com

Emerson Designs

WEB DESIGN/ MAINTENANCE Nu | NuExpression.com

CONTACT ForsythWoman.com 888-892-3204

Forsyth Woman Disclaimer: Please note that the inclusion of stories and articles in Forsyth Woman magazine does not imply endorsement of products or people. The views of the authors are presented for information and entertainment only, and may not necessarily reflect the views of Forsyth Woman. Specifically, Forsyth Woman in no way endorses any claim associated with health and/or well being with respect to any particular person. We disclaim all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose. We will not be held responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage that is caused or alleged to have been caused in connection with the use of, or reliance on, any content in this magazine. Forsyth Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Forsyth Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned. Forsyth Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited. ©2005 by Forsyth Woman, Inc.

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@forsythmags

14 Keeping it Real Five Love 16 The Languages: Part 1 STORY 54 COVER Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist: Comprehensive Breast Cancer Care Never Too 80 It’s Late to be Good to Yourself Your Calm 88 Finding and Distressing Through Mindfulness

60

First Look at the 90 AWomen on the Move Leadership Conference The Real Deal 94 NEW! with Candice Deal: Reduce Your Toxic Load & Spend Less

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Social Media 98 The Detox Challenge

108 Celebrations

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48

36

106

Club Pilates – Do What You Love For Life

BY TABATHA RENEGAR

It’s that time of year again when resolutions are made, exercise programs are started, and we look ahead to new beginnings.

Some might say that making an exercise resolution is cliché and doomed to fail. Well, not if Kristin and the team at Club Pilates have anything to do with it! They believe that starting the New Year with new goals is a terrific plan and with Pilates being accessible for everyone, all excuses fly out the window!

“I love having health, movement, and wellness at the center of my life. Transitioning to teaching Pilates has allowed me to have a steady and flexible schedule doing work that I really enjoy,” says Pilates instructor Kim.

Located in Thruway Shopping Center, Club Pilates is a vibrant, inclusive space with a mission statement that sums up their good energy: “We believe that Pilates is the path to a fuller, more satisfying physical existence. We believe that being in control of your body helps you to be in control of your life. And best of all, we believe that you can start anytime.”

Club Pilates makes it easy to start by offering your first class for free!

Taking advantage of a free class will allow you to experience how Pilates is so much more than just low-impact, full body workouts!

Adding Pilates to your lifestyle, with classes that challenge both the body and mind, is sure to enrich your life well beyond the time you spend exercising.

Some benefits of a regular Pilates practice include: • Better balance and physical coordination • Increased muscle strength and tone • Mobility • Flexibility • Core strengthening • Improved posture • Increased lung capacity through deep breathing • Increased body awareness • Stress management and relaxation Kristin, the owner of Club Pilates, says that they opened here “to make Pilates accessible to more people in the area with flexible class times, affordable memberships, and options for all levels from beginners to advanced.”

Naturally, offering a safe and clean environment is a priority for everyone at Club Pilates and steps are being taken to ensure cleanliness to help guests feel comfortable. For example, each participant works with their own set of equipment, which is cleaned between each class, and (by coincidence) participant stations are each 6’ apart. They have also added touchless checkin, state of the art sanitation processes, easy social distancing, and increased cleaning regimens.

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Just call, email, or hop on to their website to book a free introductory class or get more information about Club Pilates’ full schedule, class types, levels, and teacher training.

Kristin, who transitioned from practicing yoga to Pilates, says that instead of having 9 to 5 “jobs,” becoming a Pilates teacher created an opportunity to do something that she was truly passionate about that is also fun, rewarding, and enjoyable.

Understanding that others might also be looking for an energetic new start and seeing the new openings every day for teachers of this increasingly popular form of exercise, Club Pilates will begin two teacher training programs soon. One in January, and the second in early spring.

In the Club Pilates teacher training program you will learn the techniques and skills to become a confident and talented Pilates instructor. Throughout the program you will work closely with the local Master Trainer as you study the individual exercises, practice teaching your peers, learn principles of movement, and how to effectively communicate your ideas and support your future students. The “Comprehensive” program is 500 hours and it includes scheduled “In Studio Days” as well as self-paced online learning, practice teaching, observation hours, and assistant teaching.

Nicole, a Pilates Teacher says, “I had never even taken a Pilates class before I signed up for teacher training and I could not be more happy with the decision. The process was rigorous and thorough, but also very fun and rewarding. I have made a career out of teaching and never looked back. I love every second of it!”

Club Pilates is a locally owned and operated franchise. It is located at 371 Lower Mall Drive in the Thruway Shopping Center. Call Club Pilates at 336.717.1222, or visit online at ClubPilates.com/ WinstonSalem. Be sure to “like” Club Pilates (Winston-Salem) on Facebook and follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

Free Intro Class!

Club Pilates

YOUR SPACE. YOUR PLACE. Workout in your own personal station at the cleanest place in town!

Try a FREE introductory class to feel the benefits for yourself!

CLUB PILATES WINSTON-SALEM 336.717.1222 • clubpilates.com/winstonsalem • winstonsalem@clubpilates.com

Keeping It Real TAKE TWO!

BY DR. DEBBIE LANIER

Trust has been shattered in this hour.

Shady deals and padded pockets perforate every arena of culture. Those who vowed to work for our good now work exclusively for their own.

If that isn’t enough, in our daily living, we find ourselves very personally shattered by some whom we allowed into our innermost sanctum.

All the broken promises leave us wondering, “Can anyone be trusted?”

Listen close, friend. “God is not a man—He doesn’t lie. [He doesn’t] take back what He’s said, or say something and not follow through, or speak and not act on it.” (Numbers 23:19, VOICE) God can be trusted with you and every single thing that concerns you. He is not merely enough. He’s more than you’ll ever need!

When I tell you God’s LIVING WORD saved my very life a few years ago, it’s no exaggeration! A tsunami crashed in on me from every direction without warning. In my desperation, I chose to BELIEVE GOD’S WORD MORE THAN I BELIEVED ANYTHING ELSE! Turns out God’s Word proved to be everything He Promised and then some. I didn’t merely survive a thing. I actually rose from the ashes so much better than before! For real y’all!

Because I know that I know the absolute Power of this Living Word, I desperately desire that YOU taste it, too! Here's a devotional for every day of the month!

Let’s begin this New Year well. Come dive into these pages with me. Let’s put God’s Word to the test and watch it triumph in your life just like it has every other time throughout the ages for those who BELIEVED GOD’S WORD MORE THAN THEY BELIEVED ANYTHING ELSE! It’s just $10! You can purchase yours today at www.hopecommunitychurch. tv/web-store

For comments or prayer, contact Dr. Lanier at PastorDebbie@HopeCommunityChurch.tv.

Girls’

B E S T

S T E A K S

&

C H O P S

Night Out

Wednesday, January 5th 5pm until Enclosed outdoor seating with heaters!

Davie Tavern

Half Price Spinach & Artichoke Dip Half Price “Sunrise over Davie” Signature Cocktail

Grab a friend, a neighbor, your sister, your mother, a co-worker, and have a much needed Girls’ Night Out!

TANGLEWOOD CROSSING SHOPPING CENTER 5279 U.S. Hwy. 158 | Advance , N.C. 27006 | 336-940-2010 |

@Davietavern | DavieTavern.com

w sP e i oint of V

BY TA BATH A RE

NEG AR

t 1 r a –AB P : s e The g a eg u Five g i Love Lan

nn

’ r e

Early in 2021, I had the pleasure of being on the Forsyth Magazine podcast with colleague and Publisher Brooke Eagle. As an ice breaker to get the session started, Brooke asked us what our love language was. I tried to answer something witty because I realized at that moment that I really had no clue. Of course I had heard of love languages and even had a basic understanding that they were attributed to someone from North Carolina.

And that is about where my knowledge ended.

I felt a bit foolish that I didn’t know more about love languages but then realized, well if I don’t, perhaps others don’t either! Thus begins my five part series to introduce, or perhaps refresh, your awareness of the theories behind the five love languages.

The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate is a 1992 book by China Grove, N.C. native, Dr. Gary Chapman. The book outlines five general ways that romantic partners express and experience love, which Chapman calls “love languages.”

According to Wikipedia, the book sold 8,500 copies in its first year, four times what the publisher expected!

The following year it sold 17,000, and two years later, 137,000. It has been on the New York Times Best Seller list since August 2009. A new, revised edition of The Five Love Languages was released on January 1, 2015.

The five “languages” are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Gift Giving, & Quality Time Dr. Chapman suggests that to discover another person’s love language, one must observe the way that they express love to others. According to his theory, each of us has one primary and one secondary love language.

NEW YEAR, NEW WORDS As I began to do research for my articles, I was drawn to a possible connection between making New Year’s resolutions and words of affirmation. After all, if words of affirmation aren’t already a part of your communication style with your loved one, what better way is there to start a new year than by adding them in?

So, does it just mean that we should say more nice stuff? Not exactly. The idea behind love languages is to observe the way that your partner expresses love to others. Most of us tend to give love in the manner in which we hope to receive it. How beneficial to couples if we could better understand the language that we each respond to the best!

My husband does not do lazy very well.

Oh, sure, he can relax on a beach with the best of ‘em but if he’s at home, he’s on the move. Yard work, house work, laundry, dog washing, car detailing… he simply doesn’t stop. I could follow him around and compliment each and every thing he is doing and tell him how fabulous he is (words of affirmation) when what he really needs from me is to pick up a rake or dust a room once in a while! That would be speaking to him in the language that he is most comfortable with: acts of service.

So while I appreciate his efforts very much, this example demonstrates that we have differing languages. I’m more of a words of affirmation gal and need to hear things like “thank you for listening”, and “you’re fun to be with”, and simply “I love you.” The downside to this being my primary love language is that negative comments cut a little deeper and I can seem overly sensitive.

If you discover, like my husband did, that your partner’s primary love language is words of affirmation, it’s important that you regularly tell them how much you care. Yes, I know that sounds obvious. However, saying things like “they should know how much I love them so I shouldn’t have to say it” won’t cut it. They need to hear it from you on a consistent basis and you need to be thoughtful and genuine. I’m not saying you need to write poetry or profess your love from the street below like Romeo to Juliet. Just be true, be you.

After all, there aren’t many languages that you can learn that will promise to enhance your relationships with those you love. But I believe we have just found one that will.

Black Mountain Chocolate

Get Your Year Off to a Great Start

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

I’m not one for New Year’s resolutions. Is that because the task feels onerous or because I fail at keeping them? Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Either way, my “problem” with resolutions is that they so often feel like corrections: • I am too flabby…I will exercise more • I eat too much crap…I will stop buying Lay’s Classic potato chips • I am cranky with the people I love…I will suck it up, push it down and put a fake smile on my face Sorry, but that’s as far from inspiring as it gets. Why would anyone look forward to the New Year with a list of “resolutions” like that?

Instead, I start from an entirely different place, one that mirrors my approach to housework: when Thursday rolls around and it’s time to scrub down the bathrooms, I envision the end goal - a clean, wellordered home - which makes it so much easier to get cranking. Now, as the New Year rolls in, instead of stressing over fixing myself and dreading what that would require, I get excited about imagining the kind of year I want to create and the actions I want to take to bring that year to life.

GROUND IT Whether you use a vision board, create a collage, work from a spreadsheet, or write longhand in a brand spanking new journal, the important thing is to start from a place of aspiration and intention. You might choose an overarching theme for the year, such as “Compassion and Connection,” or “Bad -Ass Adventure.” Or maybe it is simply a word such as “Joy” or “Family.” If you need more, go ahead and write a brief paragraph.

CREATE A FEW KEY CATEGORIES This might include relationships, lifestyle, work and career, home, and/or finances. These categories will change from year to year depending on your theme.

January 2018 was the beginning of our first full year here in North Carolina. My theme for that year was “A new chapter, a fresh start.” My key categories included: “beautiful new home,” “new friendships,” “slower but still active lifestyle.”

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GIVE IT MOMENTUM From the “template” you’ve just created, begin to lay out one or two actions in each category that will get you moving in the direction of the year you want to have. Hint: I find using a garden analogy helpful, thinking in terms of actions that simplify or “weed things out,” as well as actions that are generative, that “plant seeds” for what I want to have or experience. I also think in terms of “nurturing” because what gets my attention is what I ultimately manifest.

CHALLENGE YOURSELF At this point, you will have a fairly rich image in place for the year you want to have, where you want to focus, and a few specific actions that support that image. Bravo! Now you need to vet it to ensure that what you’ve laid out is really what you want to go for.

You do that by asking: • Does this vision for the year excite and inspire me?

• Does this vision reflect who I am and support who I am becoming?

• What can I change, scrap, or add to make this even more of what I want?

• Is this vision too “safe”?

Do I want to include more actions that will allow me to grow or develop myself in some way?

• Have I focused enough on selflove in the form of self -care – spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical?

Here’s to your beautiful year!

Barn on Country Club

Winston-Salem’s Best Kept Secret!

Home Decor | Artwork Custom Built Tables, Benches & Much More!

336-661-8400 | thebarnoncountryclub.com 4886 Country Club Road Winston-Salem Closed Monday, Tuesday-Saturday 10am-6pm, Sunday 12-6pm

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

. com t n e m o m w. abrightm t h g i r ww @b co oment

Hi! I’m Lauren. I’m a freelance writer, a food blogger and the official Forsyth Mags Foodie! Stay tuned each month to find everything from achievable dessert ideas to healthy, quick dinners that’ll happily feed the family.

Easy Mongolian Chicken

Servings: 4 | Prep Time: 10 | Cook Time: 15 | Total Time: 25

Ingredients • 1 lb chicken thighs or breasts, finely chopped • 2 tbsp. flour • 1/2 tsp. salt • 1/2 tsp. black pepper • 2 garlic cloves, minced • 5 dried red chili • 1” fresh ginger, minced or grated • 3 tbsp soy sauce • 2 tbsp brown sugar • 1 tbsp olive oil • 1 tsp hoisin • 1/2 cup chicken broth or water to serve: • avocado • sesame seeds • basmati rice • scallions

Instructions 1. Toss the chopped chicken, flour, salt, and black pepper to evenly coat.

2. In a large pot over medium high heat, heat up the olive oil for 1 minute.

3. Add the chicken to cook for 5-6 minutes, until almost fully cooked and beginning to brown.

4. Add the minced ginger, garlic, and red chili (or 1 habanero for substitute). Sauté for 2-3 minutes, until fragrant.

5. Add the soy sauce, broth, sugar, flour, and hoisin sauce and stir until well combined.

6. Cook until the sauce thickens to coat the chicken, about 4-6 minutes.

7. Enjoy warm with basmati rice, scallions, and avocado, garnished with a lime slice and sesame seeds!

Evelyn Rose Boutique

S H O P E V E LY N R O S E B O U T I Q U E . C O M 916 Burke Street Winston-Salem, NC | Tuesday - Saturday 11am - 6pm @theevelynroseboutique

Rethink Your House, Simplify Your Life

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

It’s January and we’re busy crafting resolutions, breaking open our new journals, and making plans for living better, healthier, and yes, simpler lives.

You may be looking around your home and wondering how you can create a space that functions more simply, with your needs in mind. I am, which is why I like to use this month to jump-start an annual, mini-makeover that moves me clearly in that direction.

Where should this live? Most of us have several things that inexplicably float around the house; their homelessness is a steady source of frustration. I have been known to ask, “Why are my gardening pots on the veranda, in the garage, and in the sunroom?

No wonder I can’t find that blue and gold one.” Sound familiar? So, be the boss of your stuff and the queen of your home by giving everything a home. This simple act can unload a ton of daily, unnecessary stress.

GET STARTED

How can I simplify on a daily basis? Some people “deal with the house” on their day off, or on the weekend. I get that; it’s one less thing to fuss over in the midst of other life and work responsibilities. But by doing just a few small things on a daily basis, you can lighten the load on that designated day and enjoy your home a bit more in the meantime. I heard a woman say that the incentive behind cleaning up her kitchen each evening was the contentment she felt in getting her coffee each morning.

I know that’s what gets me to restore order in my own kitchen! Some other daily habits might include: • Making the bed every morning • Doing a load of laundry • Wiping down the bathroom counters and mirror • Picking up the magazines, shoes, and doggie paraphernalia now that everything has a home • Standing in front of the trash can and throwing away the junk mail • Updating the grocery list the minute you realize you are running low on something

We all know about the power of decluttering, but don’t go crazy by giving your things the heave ho just yet. Instead, start with a few key questions: How do I want my home to feel?

You might consider adjectives such as: pulled together, cozy, organized, tranquil, artistic, or inviting.

Home in on that feeling and ask: “What can I change, subtract or add to achieve that? Some timeless criteria might include: Is an item useful, beautiful, or does it make your heart sing? If so, it may be a keeper. But if that item is obsolete, too used up to be functional, or “no longer you,” it may be time to let it go. The great news is that you can consign, donate, or even save things up for a spring tag sale in your yard or at your church. So, get yourself some large contractor bags or boxes and start sorting. And, if you absolutely can’t make a decision about an item, put that aside for now and give yourself a decision deadline. Once you’ve gone through this step, your home will already feel lighter.

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I hate it when the throw pillows are askew, so fluffing them up is one of my 15-second daily habits. Take a look around and consider how you live and what bugs you. Then create your own personalized list of daily habits that will eliminate those stressors.

When spring rolls back around, celebrate your progress and do another pass. It will be so much easier the second time around!

Restoration Med Spa

On the Road Again: Rhode Island

BY AMY HILL

Great things come in small packages - and small states. There’s much more to tiny Rhode Island than meets the eye. Here’s how to spend seven days in Little Rhody.

Day 1: Arrive in Warwick

As the smallest state in the country, Rhode Island is one of the simpler states to travel around. By booking a roundtrip flight and rental car into T.F. Green International Airport (PVD) in Warwick, visitors only need one accommodation for the week, as the state’s best beaches, attractions, and tourist destinations are all within a reasonable driving distance for day trips. With Warwick being less than 15 minutes away from Downtown Providence, and a short drive away from other must-see sights, choose an accommodation by the airport to get cozy for the week.

Day 2: Explore Newport

Biltmore House enthusiasts and those with an appreciation for architecture can’t miss taking a tour of The Breakers, the summer home of the Vanderbilts built in the late-1800s. In fact, Newport is packed with historical homes, museums such as the International Tennis Hall of Fame and the Newport Car Museum, and sandy public beaches. If you have time, enjoy a wine tasting at Newport Vineyards, or start your morning off with an espresso and pain au chocolat at local hot spot Le Bec Sucré.

Day 3: Ferry to Block Island

Accessible by ferries departing from Newport or Point Judith, Block Island is ideal for lighthouse peeping. Home of the picturesque Mohegan Bluffs, Block Island is one of the rocky beauties of New England. With lighthouses lining the island’s shore, Block Island is ideal for photography lovers and beach goers alike. Keep in mind, ferry schedules are subject to change due to weather, with some ferries only departing during the warmer months of the year. Keep an eye on ferry schedules and plan your trip to Block Island accordingly.

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Day 4: Providence

Home to esteemed Brown University, Providence is Rhode Island’s state capitol. Downtown Providence is lined with eclectic eateries and pubs frequented by locals and college students. If you’re in need of comfort food, grab lunch at Ogie’s Trailer Park for a grilled cheese, or add an order of truffle tots for a classier touch. After lunch, take a relaxing stroll down the Providence River Walk to burn off the truffle tots and take in views of the Providence city skyline. If you have time, explore the historic sites surrounding Brown University, such as the Thomas P. Ives House, the John Brown House Museum, and the Stephen Hopkins House.

Day 5: Beavertail State Park

The rocky coast of Beavertail State Park is only a 45-minute drive from Warwick, allowing drivers to pass through the Windmill Hill Historic District of Jamestown en route to the park. Learn about the park by touring the Beavertail Lighthouse Museum, or sightsee at one of the park’s stunning scenic overlooks. In Jamestown, watch boats enter and exit the Safe Harbor Jonestown Boatyard or enjoy the fresh saltwater air at Fort Wetherill State Park.

Day 6: Wander Through Warwick

On your last full day in Rhode Island, stay close to home and take advantage of what Warwick has to offer. During blueberry picking season (July through early September), don’t skip taking a trip to Rocky Point Blueberry Farm for an opportunity to taste fresh New England blueberries. Visit the Warwick Lighthouse or take a walk down the fishing pier at Rocky Point State Park.

Chow down on seafood at Iggy’s Doughboys & Chowder House for a true taste of Rhode Island.

Day 7: Head Home

With a short drive back to the airport, there’s no need to head to the airport in a rush. If you have an afternoon flight home, enjoy your morning with a warm cup of coffee and a doughnut at one of Warwick’s many local coffee joints before returning your rental car and boarding your flight home.

Brookeridge Retirement

Reset Regularly with Self-Care DIY Spa & Self-Massage

BY SUSAN B.B. SCHABACKER

Whether RELAX, RESTORE, REJUVENATE, & REFRESH you’re a We all need some R&R, and a spa experience isn’t just a luxurious workaholic escape for the senses, but an ideal way to recharge. And, with running a multiple health and beauty benefits, consider a regular spa as a business or a busy much-needed self-care routine. mom running a • Alleviate anxiety as you soothe your senses household, it’s time to • Detox from chemicals and toxins treat yourself to some • Relieve headaches, aches and pains much-needed R&R. • Support weight loss and maintenance • Improve blood flow and circulation • Reduce muscle tension ALIGN YOUR MIND, • Boost your immune system BODY, & SPIRIT • Prevent varicose veins For the healthiest, most healing • Promote glowing and radiant skin DIY spa experience, consider • Delay onset of wrinkles with anti-aging benefits thinking outside the box. Research • Boost level of happiness with suggests spirituality, mindfulness, release of serotonin and positivity influence our health, wellness, and even longevity, so Planning out your DIY spa experience can integrating these practices into your spa help you make the most of it, whether solo routine may have a synergistic effect. or with loved ones.

Make the most of music that embraces your ears as well as the serenity of silence. Create a spa-ready playlist with soothing soundscapes and nature sounds like ocean waves, running water, bird song, and chirping crickets.

Elements to incorporate may include prayer, meditation, visualization, and positive affirmations. While restfully relaxing, pray and ask for what you need, especially in regards to health and healing.

Avoid chemicals and toxins in beauty and household products and opt for the more organic and natural whenever possible.

For cleansing, try pure liquid castile or bar soap. For exfoliating, mix recycled coffee grounds or tea leaves, rolled oats, sea salt, or sugar with a plant-based oil such as coconut, apricot kernel, or avocado oil. For toning, add cooled green or herbal tea, rosewater, and/or witch hazel to a spray bottle. For hydrating, try shea butter, cocoa butter, kukui nut butter, vitamin E, aloe vera, and/or other plant-based oils. And, the next time you eat an avocado, wash and dry the pit to use as a massage tool.

AMBIANCE AND ATMOSPHERE

More than just a body detox, focus on clearing your mind of any clutter or distracting thoughts.

Feel inner gratitude for this opportunity, love yourself unconditionally, and accept and make peace with yourself. Instead of seeing yourself as flawed, silence those critical and negative voices. Replace negative with positives. It may take a steady shift of perspective, but the sooner and more deeply and completely you can accept yourself just the way you are inside and out, the better off you will be.

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Light your space with tea lights or scented candles. Replace glaring overhead lighting with fairy lights, Christmas lights, or lanterns.

Add fresh plants or flowers to benefit breathability and add to the aesthetics of the room.

Want the room to smell good?

Keep the air chemical-free and mist with essential oils diluted with distilled water.

No need for boredom during downtime as the masks and spa treatments to your face, hair, and skin dry. Get readables ready, like magazines and books, to dive into.

Mix together your DIY spa products and set out tools ahead of time. Don’t forget a brush for skin, a comb for hair, and massagers for the body. Keep your spa routine simple and focus on detoxing, exfoliating, cleansing, and moisturizing, followed by massage.

To detox, soak in a bath with Epsom salts, baking soda, and/or essential oils. There’s no need to hire a professional masseuse.

Instead, save money with a DIY massage. Mix a plant-based carrier oil with essential oils, nab some basic massage techniques, and say, “Ahhh!” Don’t forget to include your hands, feet, and ears and consider trying reflexology.

Good news. There’s no need to overspend on money or time to enjoy a spa getaway in the comfort of your own home.

Recharging your metaphoric batteries with a regular DIY routine can offer a new lease on life and contribute to your health and healing.

Salemtowne

Making Dollars, Making $ense Securities offered through LPL Financial, Member FINRA/SIPC, Investment advice offered through Independent Advisor Alliance, a registered investment advisor, Independent Advisor Alliance and Marzano Capital Group are separate entities from LPL Financial.

A Timeless Message

BY JON MARZANO, AIF®, FOUNDING PARTNER, MANAGING PRINCIPAL

It is not always easy to write an article a month or more in advance of its publication and know what to write. Crafting a message that will still be very timely to keep readers’ attention always takes some thought. Current topics change from month to month, but with this being a January article for Forsyth Woman magazine 2022, we want to make sure that we are starting your year with a timeless message.

I did not create this message; however, it may be the first time you hear it this year: “Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.” Staying motivated and finishing all of our tasks for the day is not an easy thing to do. There are any number of things that are intentionally out there to distract us from getting all of our meaningful work done and keeping us from starting out our year on the right foot. Distractions like social media and never-ending feeds of brainless videos tend to make us laugh but keep us from being productive. Distractions like daily online shopping, which were essential during the pandemic for many people may now prove to be a very wasteful use of time.

After the holidays, make it a point to spend less time every day on unproductive things and more time in the here and now. If you want to browse around for things you probably do not need for hours on end, at least do it locally at a store in your community and not online in the uber comfort of your own home. It may be time to expand your comfort zone back out. Avoid things that distract you from getting back out and living the way you want to. For many, there are still lasting effects from Covid and feelings of isolation, being unsafe, and uncertainty about your surroundings. It may take more time for some of us than others to feel comfortable again.

Try to not put off getting back out into society any longer than you need to. Life keeps passing us by one day at a time, and if we put off the things that we want to do today much longer, we may miss the opportunity altogether.

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Salem Plastic Surgery

“WHAT ONE WOMAN C AN DO” Dr. Elva Johnson Jones, professor and chair of the Department of Computer Science at Winston-Salem State University (WSSU), is one remarkably humble and accomplished woman. Her contributions to WSSU are well known on campus and she even has a building named after her. What our Forsyth County community may not know is how far and how hard she has pushed for students, both male and female, to succeed in the areas of science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM), not just computer science. She finds joy in helping students find their potential, especially students who struggle to acknowledge their own academic abilities. Dr. Jones has dedicated her life to improving access to STEM education and her efforts prove that “One woman can do a lot!”

Raised on a tobacco farm in Louisburg, North Carolina, the future Dr. Jones thrived in a supportive family where college was an expectation for all four of Sanford and Bettie Johnson’s children, with the first harvest of every year’s crop used to pay tuition. She was educated in small elementary and high schools and spent her lunchtime learning about math and science from Ollie Burrell, the Slide Rule Maestro! Her early teachers exposed their students to science fairs and educational experiences, often paying for these experiences out of their own pockets.

She saw from an early age that one caring teacher could change a life. Dr. Jones followed in the footsteps of her older sister and attended WSSU, describing her sisters as the two best elementary school teachers ever and her brother as a dynamic high school teacher! In 1970, Dr. Jones graduated from WSSU, but had learned to write computer programs while an undergraduate working in the WSSU computing center. Her journey as a teacher began while a computer programmer at WSSU, teaching students to code during her lunchtime. She continued to work at WSSU while obtaining a master’s degree at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, and then earned another master’s degree in operations research and a PhD in industrial and systems engineering at North Carolina State University (NCSU).

She was the first African American to achieve a PhD at NCSU in her field and was typically the only female in a class full of engineering majors. She accomplished these academic feats while raising a son and living in Raleigh, away from her husband, for almost three years to finish her doctoral degree. She credits two other African American PhD students, also raising children, for support and babysitting co-ops. What one woman can do is even better with other women to help and support her!

Instead of taking a job offer at NCSU upon graduation she returned to WSSU, where she taught and later became the chair of the mathematics and computer science department. She later founded the computer science department, one of the first computer science departments at an HBCU. She built the curriculum, taught classes, and led the effort to achieve ABET accreditation for both BS programs in computer science and information technology. She also led the development of the MS program in computer science and information technology. After many awards, years of community service, and decades of mentoring, Dr. Jones credits the love of teaching and helping students for “sticking around” at WSSU. With this front-row view of our education system, Dr. Jones is concerned that there still exists the dire need to increase STEM education across the board for African Americans. More mentors are needed to introduce diverse students to possibilities outside of their local world. Female mentors are especially important to model careers in STEM for young women and to help them find their voice and tap into potential they did not even know they had. The department Dr. Jones leads at WSSU has six female professors, which is far more females than most computer science departments. They have developed students who have gone on to gain doctoral degrees and who can continue this tradition of encouraging young men and women to excel in a field that impacts the lives of all of us in so many ways.

For Dr. Elva Jones “what one woman can do” is truly remarkable.

JANUARY

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Monday-Friday 10am-5pm | Saturday 10am-4pm 2626 Lewisville-Clemmons Rd. Clemmons, NC 27012

Purchasing Sofas & Chairs - Design Challenges Our most challenging questions often come from clients who are in the market to purchase new sofas and chairs. Sometimes clients want more furniture than there is space. After we measure a room, we complete a scaled drawing using our CAD software to find the best furniture arrangement. We then move forward to select fabrics and colors to suit our client’s needs. Finally, we schedule a meeting to present our strategic proposal to complete their room.

These days, performance fabrics such as Sunbrella, Inside Out and Crypton have become exceedingly popular choices for interior furnishings. While Sunbrella gained recognition for its selection of outdoor fabrics, Crypton was known for its durable, commercial fabrics.

Today, several companies offer a broad selection of fabrics suitable for all types of interior applications. These fabrics are resistant to stains and water, while being cleanable and durable. Most of the time, you can wipe off the spill or dirt. When dirt resists, you can just wipe it with a small amount of soap and water. These fabrics are recommended for clients with young children and pets. Manufacturers are smart to recognize these demands and offer a wide variety of performance fabrics. Inside Out is a performance fabric that is durable through and through. They also offer a variation of Crypton and Teflon treatments that can be applied to other fabrics of choice. This allows you to select many textile colors and textures while still having the benefit of a high-performance fabric.

PHOTO COURTESY OF © HICKORY CHAIR

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

In addition to choosing the right fabric, we educate our clients on the construction benefits of the manufacturer they select. We choose NC manufacturers who make their upholstery frames from kiln-dried premium maple or European beech wood. Joints are glued, screwed, and double doweled for durability and rigidity. Sheet webbing and flex rods are applied to the bottoms of seats to create a foundation to absorb pressure.

Seats are created with true 8-way hand tied coil springs. All springs are installed individually and anchored with metal tie wire edging. Arms are covered with polyurethane foam as the base in a variety of thicknesses and compression to create the most comfortable seating available.

After we have made choices for the upholstery pieces in a room, we then move on to the especially important accent pillows, rugs, paint colors, artwork, and custom window treatments for a complete design for your new room. We offer an array of art, lamps, and accessories to complete your project. Come by June DeLugas Interiors today and see how we can assist with your future project!

God Bless!

June

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2018, 2017, 2016, 2016, 2013

PHOTO COURTESY OF © HICKORY CHAIR

Cozy Family Room

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Give Your Hair a New Year’s Glow with Rachel at DASH Beauty

BY AMY HILL

Clients rarely visit hair salons solely expecting a quick trim and fresh color. A memorable hair appointment is truly an experience from start to finish. From high-quality highlights to sharing lighthearted laughs with clients, an experienced stylist knows that leaving clients feeling refreshed and beautiful isn’t all about using high-end products and creating the cleanest cut. When it comes to creating state-of-the-art hairstyles while fostering great stylist-client relationships, DASH Beauty in Winston-Salem is a jack of all trades.

After working behind the chair for 15 years, DASH Beauty owner and stylist Rachel Newsome was accustomed to a busy environment, having always worked in a bustling salon full of clients. When the COVID-19 pandemic mandates caused hair salons to shut down, Rachel opted to take a risk and start her own salon in order to navigate the throes of the pandemic. Although she knew she was taking a risk, the idea of being surrounded by her amazing clientele in the privacy of her own salon inspired her to push through any apprehension she might have had throughout the process of starting her own business.

Collaborating with WSNC GIRL GANG, a group of local women who own and work in their own establishments, has made a positive impact on Rachel as a female business owner in the Triad. She is grateful to surround herself with fellow empowered women who own successful businesses throughout the area. The ladies of WSNC GIRL GANG are always there to lift each other up, support each other in reaching their similar goals, and unite for the greater good of their local businesses. As a wife, mother of four, foster parent, entrepreneur, and homeschool teacher all in one, Rachel has learned how to balance her career with her personal life with the help of the supportive WSNC GIRL GANG. DASH Beauty is described by Rachel as a “one-woman show,” meaning clients get Rachel’s undivided attention throughout the duration of their appointment. Rachel adores being able to have deep, meaningful conversations with her clients without the background noise of a busy salon. In fact, Rachel’s clients describe her as a good listener and great conversationalist. If clients are nervous about making a change to their beloved locks, Rachel’s ability to make them feel comfortable and cared for helps put their minds at ease. Creating gorgeous hair not only pleases her clients, but also serves as a form of therapy for Rachel herself. She often finds that she loses herself in her work, allowing her to forget the world’s troubles when she steps into the salon.

With a plethora of artistic talents, Rachel is well-versed in wedding do’s, performing freelance work in bridal shops throughout North Carolina. Whether brides are looking for loose, boho braids or a

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polished, sleek style for their big day, Rachel arrives prepared to deliver top-notch looks for ladies and gentlemen looking to tie the knot. In the midst of traveling for weddings, Rachel is also hard at work growing her hair extension business and strives to become certified in every extension method possible.

If that’s not enough, she is also in the process of bringing in clean, plant-derived retail and color lines to DASH. Within the next year, Rachel strives to open a DASH 2.0 satellite branch in Pilot Mountain, where she currently resides with her husband and children.

The name DASH Beauty originated from the first names of Rachel’s four children, with each letter representing the name of each child.

Ironically, the name DASH also happens to pair nicely with the iconic Winston-Salem Dash minor league baseball team. Inside the salon, plant-powered color care products such as Loma and Bōkka Botánika are available for purchase. Rachel highly recommends Bōkka Botánika’s Velvet Smooth, a blow-dry balm that makes hair sleek, shiny, and smooth while providing heat protection to delicate strands. Finish off your locks with Abyssianian & Kendi oil to eliminate frizz and add extra shine. Every product sold at DASH is free of sulfates, parabens, phthalate, mineral oils, and smells divine.

Looking to protect your hair from the cold winter air? Rachel’s top priority at DASH is hair health. Every color service provided at DASH is infused with a syringe of B3 Brazilian Bond Builder, which Rachel believes is the ultimate weapon to dramatically reduce breakage and rebuild bonds in the hair. Outside of the salon, Rachel insists on investing in a professional grade, sulfate-free shampoo and conditioner to keep hair protected and color looking vibrant. She suggests setting curling irons or straightening devices on low heat settings, ideally around 350-380°, and applying a heat protectant spray before drying and styling for best results.

Ready to book at DASH Beauty? Follow and message @rachel. dashbeauty on Instagram, or call/text (336) 934-0873 to schedule an appointment or consultation. To learn more, check out Rachel Newsome Hair at Dash Beauty on Facebook.

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January 2022 | 35

Five Things You May Not Know About Habitat for Humanity

BY DEBBIE LINVILLE

Habitat for Humanity’s vision is a world where everyone has a safe, healthy, and affordable place to live. For nine Forsyth County families, ringing in 2022 not only marks the beginning of the New Year, but an exciting new chapter in their lives.

For these families, many of whom are first generation homeowners, the keys to their new homes symbolize newly realized stability and an opportunity to create beautiful memories.

I can paint the walls any color I want and plant a garden. I’ve always wanted a home of my own since I was a child.

It really is a dream come true.”

-Nancy, Habitat Forsyth’s newest homeowner While you may already know a little about Habitat for Humanity, you may still have some questions. Lets dig into the top five questions that people have about Habitat for Humanity.

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1. Do they give away free homes?

The answer to this is really simple: no.

Habitat for Humanity does not give away homes but does provide tools to families for a stronger, more stable, and self-reliant future through their homeownership program.

A large part of the program is the required 400 hours of “sweat equity,” working alongside volunteers and other future homeowners building homes, helping out in the ReStores, and completing a series of financial literacy, personal development, and home maintenance/repair workshops.

In Forsyth County, the typical 3-bedroom apartment can cost renters between $900$1,200 per month while a mortgage serviced through Habitat Forsyth costs homeowners between $350-$500 per month, including insurance and taxes. This not only helps families save money each month, but also helps families create generational wealth.

2. Besides building homes, what else does Habitat do?

Habitat’s philosophy of a “hand-up, not a hand-out” is realized at every turn.

The same financial management, personal development, and home repair workshops that are offered to those in the homeownership program are also offered for free to the public.

Critical repairs (e.g., making a home more ADA compliant, repairing a leaky roof) are performed on owner occupied homes, even if they were not purchased through Habitat for Humanity.

Habitat just recently celebrated 2 years of offering youth programs. Through their Youth Empowerment Program (YEP) and Youth Culinary Arts Program, the goal is to remove barriers to success for youth ages 11-17 and help them realize their full potential through community-based education, mentoring, and enrichment programs.

3. I have never built a home before, but I want to volunteer. How do I get started?

We have great news for you! No experience is needed to volunteer with Habitat for Humanity. If it is building you want to do, the construction team leads new groups of volunteers daily and loves teaching them new skills (construction volunteers must be 16 or older).

Volunteers can also positively impact the local community in numerous ways in the ReStores. From customer service roles to merchandising on the sales floor, there are many opportunities geared toward individual interests and skills.

If your time is limited and you want to help Habitat for Humanity, additional funding is always needed to help more families access safe, healthy, and affordable housing solutions. There are a myriad of options to financially support Habitat. One such opportunity is The Hammer Society: Women Who Build, where members collectively sponsor and build a local family’s home and gather for quarterly networking and volunteering events to connect with other women.

4. How is Habitat for Humanity related to the Habitat ReStore?

Easy! The Habitat ReStores are owned and operated by Habitat for Humanity. The four ReStores in Forsyth County help fund the work of Habitat in our local community while offering sustainable solutions for those looking to divest themselves of gently used household items, those who might be shopping on a budget, or those committed to only purchasing secondhand items.

Each ReStore is unique and inventory changes daily.

Whether you are a homeowner, contractor, do-it-yourselfer, or treasure hunter, a plethora of items well below retail await!

5. How are prices determined at the ReStore?

Believe it or not, quite a bit goes into determining the price of an item before it hits the floor. Knowledgeable staff and volunteers evaluate each item as it comes in and set prices based on comparison to mainstream retail shops and second-hand sites like eBay and Facebook Marketplace.

When an item first reaches the sales floor, it is already marked 25%-75% below retail and then using their color coded discount system, donated items are discounted even deeper on the 1st and 15th of each month.

To learn more about Habitat for Humanity of Forsyth County or to get involved, visit Habitatforsyth.org or call 336-765-8854.

January 2022 | 37

Bringing Joy to Every Day

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

“What is your intention for today?”

“My what?”

“Your intention. You know, what do you want this day to be like? How do you want to experience it?”

For a long stretch of time, questions like these sounded like whoo hoo from an alternate universe. I mean, I had THINGS TO DO if I wanted a shot at accomplishing, acquiring, and achieving something in this life. I knew that I was a good student, a hard worker, and I had this vague sense that I wanted to make everything that I touched better in some way, or more beautiful. And I knew one more thing: I didn’t want to be poor. What did I want to experience?

Anything that would further my goals.

That was a long time ago, and, looking back, I know that by striving, planning, saving, and working my butt off, I’ve done alright. Those skills were my “Go To’s” and I have never taken them for granted. But the other stuff – the playful, fun, spontaneous, joy-inducing stuff – that’s what I’ve had to learn.

This morning, my virtual yoga instructor channeled the whoo hoo, inviting us to put a word to the type of day we wanted to have.

Present to myself, I recognized the question as an “If not now, when?” moment of choice.

Instead of “productive” or one of its equally apt, industrious synonyms, I reached for what I really want right now.

I chose “joyful.”

Post-yoga, and immersed in customer service snafus to unravel, articles to draft, courses to review, and doctor appointments to make, an incoming text challenged my resolve: “Hey. Such a beautiful day. Want to do Happy Hour? Your place or mine. LMK.” My To Do’s stared me down, taunted me.

Instead of caving, I decided to put them in their rightful place by making the joyful choice: “Sure. 5:00? Your deck.”

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Life is full of responsibilities, obligations, lists, tasks, challenges, upsets, curve balls and strikes. And on top of all of that, major stuff happens. In the midst of the many things that you cannot control, “saving a space for joy” is a worthy intention. While your path may have been much different from mine, you may also feel the limitations of a temporary rut or a prolonged routine.

See that as a soulful prompt and then go for the joy.

BRING ON THE JOY

Identifying five things I am grateful for Stepping outside to take in the natural beauty of the air, the earth, the sky Telling my sister exactly why I think she is an awesome human being Exchanging recipes via text with my niece Amusing myself by watching a series, reading a frivolous magazine, or starting a new book

Spending “Happy Hour” with someone whose company you welcome is one of countless ways you can bring joy to your day. Here are others I’ve embraced:

Trying a different exercise routine

Seeking out a novelty – a different Starbucks beverage this time

Being genuinely kind to someone

Contacting someone out of the blue – made my day and hers!

Walking my neighbor’s dog – talk about bonding

Changing up my morning walk by taking a different route

Decorating my husband’s grocery list with hearts and silly sayings Stopping into a store where I’ve never shopped Forgiving someone who has hurt me

Leaving an unexpected something for a neighbor – a seasonal plant, pumpkin, or treat

Giving myself a pass on my daily routine, and:

Asking to speak to the manager – to praise their employee

Taking myself out on a spontaneous adventure

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BY TARYN JEREZ A monthly column that keeps its finger on the pulse of Forsyth’s artists and their inspiring stories!

This month’s featured artist, Ollie Singleton, has created in many artistic disciplines including visual, decorative, and theatre arts; clothing design and redesign; fiction and non-fiction literature.

OLLIE SINGLETON | ARTIST, AUTHOR, PUBLISHER How would you describe your work?

I cannot answer this question succinctly because I have done watercolor, acrylic, and oil painting; silk screen printing; mixed-media collage; upcycled/refashioned clothing; and turned reclaimed wood into wood art. I describe the technique I use for many of these: “piecing together.” The basis, even for my abstract paintings, is piecing together various elements to get to a full composition.

What influences your art most?

First and foremost I would say that I am the epitome of “art for art’s sake.” I am a self-taught artist. At my core, probably since I came into the world, has been the drive to create art. To take this even further, I assert in my new book that my creative style comes from a genetic link to my maternal grandfather. I perceived this link when I was salvaging the wood from my late grandfather’s 100-year-old repair shop he built on his farm in Anson County, NC.

I have also been influenced by the plethora of experiences I have had in my very varied life over several decades. I was born in North Carolina and am living here for the third time. But I have lived in several other states: Pennsylvania, California, Texas, Oklahoma, and New Jersey. I have been a public school teacher and administrator, and I have worked many years in the corporate sector. All the while I was immersed in those careers, I was creating art in some form or fashion.

When you get right down to it you might say I have been guided by instinct, feelings, love of beauty, love of literature, love of my family and friends, and love of myself.

How have you evolved, personally, as an artist?

I am always Evolving - present continuous/ progressive tense. For as long as I am creating art I will be evolving, especially since I am learning on my own - instinctively and intuitively.

Your new book, A Woman’s Art

By Her Grandfather’s Hands is a beautiful legacy.

Yes, thank you! The book is my legacy, but I create art because that is what is at the core of my being. Until a year and a half ago I had never dreamed of telling my art story and putting the art I have created over a lifetime, in book form. Once I realized how much art I had created, I started to think about a book. In the book I start with my third grade art exhibition, and take the reader through my art creation journey that ends with using the wood I reclaimed from my grandfather’s repair shop as the basis for my wood art. My 265-page book is predominantly full-color photographs of my art, but there is a storyline.

What are you working on that excites you right now?

Since finishing my book, which took up a great chunk of my life (I’d do it again!), I continue to create art.

Presently I am loving doing abstract oil paintings on canvas. For me it feels like this type of painting is a coalescence of the art I have created over my lifetime.

Lately I have been tapping more into local art groups although I have been involved with several of them since I moved back to the area. I upcycled clothing for seven years and had lots of fun, but I have pretty much put it aside. I’m looking forward to gifting some special paintings to a local establishment in memory of my mom. My plan to do a One-Woman-Art Exhibit and Sale in the near future is also exciting right now!

What is one piece of advice you’d like to share with fellow artists?

Have an open mind, see the beauty in the strange looking things you encounter, and follow your heart. It wouldn’t hurt to do some self-analysis on a regular basis.

If you are interested in learning more about Ollie Singleton you can check out her website at https:// olliesingleton.com or her Etsy shop at https://etsy.com/ shop/olliesartandvintage You may also reach her by phone at 336-765-0437.

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DETOX

New Year’s Resolutions for Singles

BY AMY HILL

Still single in 2022? If you’re down about your relationship status, or lack thereof, here are a few New Year’s resolutions to adopt for keeping the single life blues at bay.

NO MORE COMPARISONS When you’re single, it’s easy to feel inadequate or like a failure when most of your friends and former classmates have found spouses, are on their second and third pregnancies, and are building a home for their family before the age of 30. In fact, it’s nearly impossible not to question where you took a misstep throughout your life to be in the loveless position you’re currently in. When you find yourself in this headspace, it’s important to remember that your life has value in the same way your married friends’ lives have value - and that they might even be envious of your freedom. Comparing your life to the lives of those around you is one of the easiest ways to deceive yourself and harm your mental health. As clinical psychologist and best-selling author Jordan Peterson writes in his book 12 Rules for Life, remember to “compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.”

STOP BEING RULED BY FEAR Similar to how society reacted to the pandemic in early 2020, when toilet paper became a hot commodity, fear often causes us to act irrationally and coerces us to make decisions we will likely later regret. The illusion of scarcity when it comes to dating might put pressure on you to snag the first satisfactory partner you come across, even if you find yourself overlooking a few red flags in the beginning. If you find yourself compromising your values or long-term goals to please a potential spouse or partner, this might be a sign that you’re acting out of fear and desperation rather than true love. Cognitive distortions lie to us and tell us that our days left for love are numbered, and that we must settle for less to avoid missing out in the future. Keep in mind that while being single year after year can be lonely and depressing, being legally bound to someone you’ve slowly grown to despise would be just as dreadful, if not worse.

DON’T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU SEE One of the only things more deceitful than the negative voices in our heads is how relationships are portrayed on social media. If we learned anything from the Gabby Petito tragedy, it’s that not everything is as it seems on the surface - or on YouTube and Instagram. Social media users typically only post photos or videos that highlight the best parts of their lives, rather than the cheating, lying, or abuse that might be happening behind closed doors. It’s wise to be skeptical of any couple flaunting their seemingly perfect relationship in front of the eyes of their Instagram followers. In the words of William Shakespeare, “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”

REALIZE WHAT YOU WANT Pause and consider whether finding a life partner and settling down is what you truly want or if it’s something you feel like you should want. Going against the grain is never comfortable and can make you feel like an outsider. Are you putting pressure on yourself to find love because it would be pleasing to your family and friends? Would you be emotionally available enough to be a good spouse or partner to someone? Are you ready to make sacrifices and compromise for the health of your relationship? Be honest with yourself about your strengths, weaknesses, goals, and desires. You might find that the pressure you feel to find a relationship is externally-based rather than a desire from within. It’s okay to admit to yourself that love isn’t what you want out of life in the present moment. Accept your current mindset and take the societal burden of marriage off of your shoulders.

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Mascara

is my Superpower - What’s Yours?

BY GEN CONDON

But then it happens, the dog whines to go outside and my son’s feet hit the floor, sleep still lingering in his eyes and he’s off to wreck the house, give me gray hairs before I’m 35, and simultaneously make me proud all at the same time.

Momma Mode - ACTIVATE! I throw on whatever outfit will pass for the day, making mental note of any work meetings to ensure that the shirt is fancy enough for Zoom and the pants? Well yoga pants are a staple and all the rage these days. I am pretty much a fashionista.

Listening to my son rummage through his room, toys and books hitting the ground with a force that I know means a huge mess. I know what must happen: mascara.

Most mornings I wake up, unsure of what happened the night before. There are baby feet precariously balanced on my face, and with one sudden movement, I’m pretty sure I’ll get a black eye.

As I hang off the bed, listening to the snores of my husband, son, and dog, I wonder how am I going to throw myself together today and tackle the long list of work, family, and household tasks that await me.

Most mornings I don’t feel that motivation, the rush to “carpe diem.” The birds chirping sometimes make me angry - after all, who is that happy and sing-songy first thing in the morning. And the sun? I wish I had permanent sunglasses to block off the rays (at least before my morning cup of coffee, or two).

There is something about mascara that makes me feel invincible, like super mom, employee, and wife all rolled into one. Quickly, I wave the black wand across my eyelashes and all those worries, the concern for the mess in the bedroom, disappears and is replaced with pure willpower and “I can conquer anything mode.” The motivation I lacked is now there. I join in with the birds chirping, singing off key to Baby Shark and rip the blinds open with the force of Superwoman.

My hair may be in a messy bun or clipped to the side to give the illusion that I actually styled it and I may have a fancy shirt paired with yoga pants (that somehow are already stained with something) but the mascara, it is on point and giving me the superpowers I need to do it all. I have transformed into Superwoman with the flick of a wand.

I don’t wear much makeup, quite frankly I barely have time to shower in the mornings, but the mascara, it is my superpower and even in my ratty sweatpants and sweater, (that I may have worn two days in a row), my eyelashes are amazing, and I feel like I can conquer anything before me.

Who knows, I may add some foundation and lip gloss and then, who knows what superpowers I may come out with next!

Lewisville Laser & Aesthetics

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Sober Sis

25 Years of Smitty’s Notes

BY DENISE HEIDEL

One of the most valued, trusted, and relied upon resources in the Winston-Salem / Forsyth County community happened purely by accident. Founded by Jeff Smith, Smitty’s Notes has been a staple for residents, visitors, and newcomers for 25 years.

“It started very simply,” said Jeff. “I was working to make plans with friends for the weekend. So I started writing an email of the local events and happenings so we could organize our plans, and before I knew it – Smitty’s Notes developed a reach far beyond my inner circle.”

“Before long, friends of friends were forwarding the email. Then, one day – someone forwarded my own email back to me.

That’s when I knew this was bigger than I had ever anticipated.” He realized that he needed a website that could be an easy-to-access resource for the community in addition to the newsletter.

For over two decades, Jeff managed Smitty’s Notes as a hobby while working full time as a litigation paralegal in Greensboro. “While working full time, I still found such enrichment from Smitty’s Notes,” Jeff shared. “I am so proud that the website and newsletter cross all demographics, ages, and professions.

“I’m especially proud of the connections that have been made through Smitty’s Notes. Friendships have been formed, and professionals have networked – all because of events where they met – events they learned about because of Smitty’s Notes. I even know of several couples who eventually got married because they met at an event posted on Smitty’s Notes!”

Jeff is also proud that Smitty’s Notes helps promote community involvement and engagement. “Over the years, I’ve been

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asked about franchising Smitty’s Notes or extending beyond Forsyth County. But I’m not really interested in doing that. I’m a big believer in supporting our community right here, and Smitty’s Notes has encouraged that. One of the things I especially enjoy doing is sitting at a table of an event promoted through Smitty’s Notes and watching the faces of those who are there – knowing that they are connecting with each other and the community as a whole.”

Though Jeff’s name is synonymous with activities and events, he is a quiet, thoughtful, and reflective man who is as content at home as he is hanging out with his family and friends. A strong community advocate, Jeff has served on various boards and committees, and today he continues to serve on the board for the Millennium Fund.

After 31 years as a paralegal, Jeff retired four years ago.

“I was diagnosed with MS in 2009 and decided that for the sake of my health, I needed to scale back. But MS doesn’t stop

me from continuing to serve our community through Smitty’s Notes.” Jeff frequently uses the platform he’s built through Smitty’s Notes to encourage others who have been diagnosed with MS and educate the community about what MS looks like.

What started as a simple email blossomed from a generous heart from one who simply wanted to experience his local community, as well as support and encourage others to take a look around at the amazing options we have here in Forsyth County. It’s that same generosity of time and talent that has made Smitty’s Notes 25-years strong with no end date in sight.

Congratulations to Jeff Smith on this tremendous accomplishment and on behalf of the community – thank you for your years of service!

For more information or to sign up for the Smitty’s Notes Newsletter, visit the website (www.smittysnotes.com), or you can email Jeff directly at smitty@smittysnotes.com.

Smitty’s Notes is also on Facebook.

BY AMY HILL

Whether you’re a wristwatch lover or a necklace novice, there’s always something new to learn when it comes to finding the right piece of jewelry for yourself or your loved one. Why shop for sentimental valuables at a cold commercial retailer in the mall? When it comes to saying “I do” to a quality engagement ring or customizing a piece of jewelry to your liking, stick to Wingo’s Fine Jewelry - Clemmons’s own small-town gem.

Store owner Danny Wingo has been in the jewelry business since the age of 14.

Decades later, Danny has only grown a stronger appreciation for jewelry, and an even stronger affinity for providing top notch customer service. Major jewelry retailers in the Triad might have an excellent selection of gold, silver, and precious stones to peruse, but they often lack the warm, welcoming community atmosphere that Danny and his team at Wingo’s Fine Jewelry strives to create for everyone who walks through the shop’s doors.

While customers are able to shop for valuables such as engagement rings and wedding bands, Wingo’s also carries high-end watches, designer rings, pearls, and more. Danny and his team stay busy with fulfilling custom jewelry orders from clients and working hard to find a design that will perfectly suit individual customers’ preferences. If you’re looking to customize a ring but have no clue where to start, Danny’s extensive knowledge of jewelry-making makes him a safe place to fall. Because all of Wingo’s custom pieces start off with a simple sketch, Danny sits down with customers and listens intently to what exactly they’re

50 | ForsythWoman.com

looking for. He sends sketches off to Wingo’s jeweler, who uses the sketches to create wax molds, which give customers a better idea of what their jewelry will look or feel like as a finished product. Being able to hold and try on a wax mold of a custom piece of jewelry helps customers determine whether they’re pleased with their design, with the helpful expertise of Danny and his team, or if their design needs a bit more fine-tuning before it’s ready for casting.

The casting process is where the jewelrymaking magic truly begins, followed by the application of hand-set stones, diamonds, and other intricate details.

Danny started fulfilling custom jewelry orders nearly 30 years ago and to him, jewelry making is nothing short of an art - which pairs nicely with the decor found around the store.

Lining the walls of Wingo’s Fine Jewelry are paintings for sale by the talented artist Phillip Philbeck, a resident of Marion, North Carolina. Ask Danny about one of Phillip’s paintings, and he will explain the techniques, paint style, and small details regarding each work of art in the shop with ease. If you don’t enter Wingo’s Fine Jewelry with an interest in art, you’re sure to leave with one.

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, Wingo’s is the prime Triad location for showering your spouse or significant other with silver or gold. Head to Wingo’s to shop for men’s watches, chains, and even bracelets. In need of an engagement ring? With 42 years of experience, Danny has seen many engagement ring trends come and go, and has a keen eye for what will be the perfect ring for popping the question. Lately, round cuts with halos have been the most popular pick among customers shopping for engagement rings, with square cuts also becoming more and more popular among prenuptial consumers.

Whether you’re in need of a new piece of jewelry, or you’re looking to size or appraise old items, visit Danny and his team for high quality products, outstanding customer service, and maybe even a newfound appreciation for art.

Visit in-person in Clemmons at 2503 Lewisville Clemmons Rd., or call the store directly at (336) 766-8505 to speak to a team member. Check out Wingo’s Fine Jewelry on Facebook and shop online at www.wingosfinejewelry.com.

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Be Kind Coffee 336-893-9892 | @bekindcoffeeco January 2022 | 51

Letting Go… & Lessons Learned

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

“Letting go means being willing to allow life to carry you to a new place, even a deeper, more true rendition of self. Holding on means trying to push life into the place of your making or be damned.”

– Andrea Mathews, LPC I remain curious about this business of learning to let go and move on. Especially the latter. I mean, what are we moving on with?

And how? More clarity, more resolve, more self-awareness, selfacceptance, less guilt, less “stuff”? And so I asked a few in my Circle: “What have you learned to let go of and what difference has that made in your life?”

J spoke of pondering the question and coming full circle: It took me a minute to think about this. After several days, I’ve ended up with what first came to mind. Go figure…

It’s taken many, many years and lots of spiritual reflection to do it but I’ve finally let go of the need to live up to my perceptions of others’ expectations of me. I’ve lived my whole life as a “pleaser,” never feeling good enough, despite most people trying to convince me otherwise. Having successfully explored how that came to be my inner voice, I at least was aware that it was there and could make a conscious choice to stop and deal with it instead of responding predictably without even thinking about it.

The bottom line? I’ve given myself a break and am much more content with knowing my capabilities and limitations. I can still be self-deprecating at times, but I catch myself more than I used to. I actually can breathe more easily these days, knowing the only one I really need to please is me.

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H pondered current choices and the inner growth ahead: I recently let go of my role as a teacher. I have poured my heart into fulfilling this role and I am accepting the fact that my work has made a difference in my students’ lives. However, I had to let go of what I hoped this role would mean for me personally. I thought that by showing children kindness and care I might heal my own inner child.

I have learned that I need to first love and care for myself. So, I’m letting go of the idea that it’s selfish to put my energy into myself. I trust it will make a positive difference for myself and others.

I am also letting go of the opportunity to live in one of the most beautiful places I’ve known and a place that was my respite as a child. In letting go of this physical place, I am acknowledging that the beauty of the place, and the peace it gave me, is deep in my soul.

L went straight to the heart’s core with these words: I have learned to let go of rejecting myself for not fulfilling goals of a fantasy self, and to encourage the emergence of my real self. Note: it has taken all my life to recognize who I am, really.

For these wise women, “being carried to a new place” means rediscovering what’s within.

Forsyth Medical Supply

Comprehensive Breast Cancer Care Focus on Patient’s Perspective Creates More Personalized, Accessible Approach Great strides have been made in the research, detection and treatment of breast cancer. In fact, rates of death from breast cancer decreased by 1% between 2013 and 2018 alone, thanks in part to screening and advances in treatment. The Comprehensive Cancer Center at Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist is contributing to those advances with a multidisciplinary approach to care that is designed around the patient.

AN INNOVATIVE MODEL A cancer diagnosis is scary. Patients often feel overwhelmed and paralyzed. Understanding and accounting for the patient’s perspective on their cancer journey is at the heart of the Comprehensive Cancer Center and its enhanced approach to patient-centered care.

Dr. Alexandra Thomas, the Williams Family Professor in Breast Oncology and professor of hematology and oncology, explains the Breast Care Center was developed to focus on what the patient wants and needs after they’ve been told they have breast cancer.

“We tried to make sure that we were looking through that lens during the process,” she says. “We care about our patients and feel strongly that the best care extends beyond our medical expertise, to patients’ emotional and psychological well-being, which complements our commitment to bringing them the best care.”

The highly personalized care starts before the patient’s first visit. After a woman receives her initial diagnosis, the care team moves quickly to develop a plan, reviewing all the patient’s medical records, as well as completing any financial clearances in advance. Then nurse navigators coordinate the patient’s first visit.

A true differentiator for patients comes during that initial visit.

There’s no going to the medical oncologist one day, the surgical oncologist another and a plastic surgeon a week later. All those initial visits are consolidated into one — the patient visits the Comprehensive Cancer Center where they will see each provider who will be part of their care team on the same day.

Dr. Marissa Howard-McNatt, director of the Breast Care Center and professor of surgery, describes the approach as very special, but there’s a strong practical side to it as well.

“Numerous clinical trials have shown patients who receive care from multidisciplinary centers have better outcomes,” she says.

“All the doctors are talking together to make the best plan for each individual patient. I know what the oncologists want to do, and we discuss that together and with the patient.” Because the doctors are working together and seeing the patient in one visit, the team is able to get the care plan underway quickly.

January 2022 | 55

UNIQUE FOR NORTH CAROLINA AND BEYOND As one of only 51 Comprehensive Cancer Centers in the U.S., a designation granted by the National Cancer Institute (NCI), the Comprehensive Cancer Center has more than 400 cancer research and clinical specialists dedicated to cancer care, research, prevention and control.

To achieve this designation, the Comprehensive Cancer Center has to meet rigorous standards set by the National Cancer Institute to ensure it offers the world-class care required for the prestigious designation. Not only is Winston-Salem fortunate to have this quality of care locally, but the entire region benefits from this collaborative and innovative model of care.

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Another strong aspect of the Breast Care Center program, shares Dr. Howard-McNatt, is that it is largely female-driven, with most of the providers made up of women, across all the disciplines. “That’s very unique to our program, not only in our region but in the state,” she says. In addition to Drs. Howard-McNatt and Thomas who run the program, there are four dedicated medical oncologists, three surgeons, two radiation oncologists and a team of specialists including reconstructive surgeons, genetic counselors and nurse navigators, who combined offer multiple layers of support.

Central to the patient-centered approach are the nurse navigators. They serve as the primary point of contact for patients throughout their diagnosis, treatment and recovery. One of those navigators, Liz Outlaw, says, “When patients first enter this world, they don’t know what they don’t know, and the nurse navigator is there to help them through the process.” Outlaw says the nurse navigators recognize

patients are coming to the Comprehensive Cancer Center in a time of need, and they try to be proactive in the patient’s care, addressing things before they become issues.

“In talking with patients, I’ve had countless women tell me how they appreciated our multidisciplinary approach,” Outlaw shares. When patients leave their first appointment, she explains they’ve met all the key care providers. The physicians come to them, and, at the end of the visit, the nurse navigator gives them a documented summary with all their doctors’ names, a summary of the next steps and a schedule for scans and follow up appointments.

Outlaw adds, “Patients have told us they appreciate our approach, and they feel reassured by the way everyone is working together. That’s key to our process — working together for their best possible outcome.”

Every year, there are still more than 6,000 women in North Carolina who will receive a breast cancer diagnosis. This year alone, more than 1,000 North Carolina women will die from breast cancer, leaving breast cancer as the second leading cause of cancer deaths for women in North Carolina, according to the N.C. Department of Health and Human Services.

The goal of the Breast Care Center is to integrate comprehensive cancer care and leading-edge research to bring the best therapy to newly diagnosed breast cancer patients. By integrating all aspects of treatment, the program provides its patients with comprehensive care from diagnosis to survivorship. As Dr. Thomas describes it, it’s “tomorrow’s therapy today.”

January 2022 | 57

American Heart Association

Rising to the Top: Health & Happiness

BY DRU DAVIS/AMERICAN HEART ASSOCIATION

Born and raised in New Bern, North Carolina, Xavier Carter enjoyed her life as any young adult would, despite her struggles of living with lupus and fibromyalgia.

Her battle to fight with her health continued at the age of 23, when she started experiencing complications in her daily routine, such as having a hard time breathing and standing for long periods of time. “I constantly felt like I was trying to catch my breath. I could barely even walk up the stairs in my house,” Xavier said.

She went from doctor to doctor, but no one could identify the exact problem. After a series of office visits, it was suggested that she use a heart monitor to better understand the issue. The heart monitor results showed a 75% blockage in one of her arteries.

Her doctor placed a stent in her heart, and for about a year she was doing great.

She participated in cardiac rehabilitation therapy for 12 weeks, where she learned to eat healthy and exercise. After seeing improvement for so long, it came as a huge surprise when her health began to worsen.

“Having lupus attacks my immune system, so one stent just wasn’t enough,” she shared. Xavier needed a second stent placed in her heart and needed to return to cardiac rehabilitation therapy for an additional round.

Along with keeping up with doctor visits, multiple pill prescriptions, and a series of shots to aid any excess blockage in her arteries, Xavier began to feel like herself again. “I even began line dancing twice a week. It feels amazing to be so free!”

Xavier shared.

She struggled with losing excess weight, but with words of encouragement from her loved ones, she began to feel the effects of a healthier lifestyle. “Once I started being healthier, exercising and dancing gave me so much energy and it’s fun,” shared Xavier.

Spreading health awareness holds a high importance in Xavier’s life. She encourages everyone to be aware of any signs their body may send, as it can save their life. “Make sure you know your body,” Xavier said. “Doctors are great, but you know your body best! Make an appointment, ask your doctor what symptoms could mean and if something does not feel right, go get it checked. Just say something!”

Living with these ailments is a day-to-day struggle. However, Xavier’s new and improved lifestyle skills have her feeling better than ever.

“At first, it was difficult to adapt because I didn’t know what foods to eat or how to get active, but I quickly realized how factors like these play a part in keeping your heart healthy and strong,” shared Xavier. Now, she strives to drink the recommended 64 ounces of water a day, stays away from salt, and eats a balanced diet with lots of veggies. “Don’t fry foods in so much grease, it’s not good for you. For those of us who just cannot seem to put down the fries, I recommended using an air fryer to avoid all the grease,” she said.

“Every day, I thank God for letting me make it through and continue enjoying my life with the ones I love the most,” said Xavier. “They encourage me so much in everything that I do.

I don’t know where I would be without them.”

Xavier Carter is a 2021 Forsyth County Go Red Woman. She is sharing her story to help prevent heart disease in women. Novant Health is proud to be the American Heart Association’s “Life is Why” and “Go Red for Women” sponsor in Forsyth County, celebrating, supporting, and encouraging women to put their health first wherever they may be in their journey.

Friday, February 4, is National Wear Red Day and the American Heart Association and Novant Health invite you to wear your red in celebration of women’s heart health. For upcoming Go Red for Women events, visit www.heart.org/Triad.

FOR FANS OF FOOD!

DAVIE TAVERN 5 2 7 9 U . S . H W Y. 1 5 8 | A D V A N C E , N . C . 2 7 0 0 6 | 3 3 6 - 9 4 0 - 2 0 1 0 | D A V I E T A V E R N . C O M

Located in the heart of Advance is a family owned business that makes dining out a memorable encounter. From food and drinks to atmosphere and service, Davie Tavern is your go-to place for delectable beef dishes and enticing seafood entrees.

LUSCIOUS AND LOCAL

Owner Allan Coats and Chef Jarod Lee are passionate about finding ingredients from local farmers and artisans, like Guilford Mill grits, fresh local fish, and locally farmed vegetables. This makes eating at Davie Tavern delicious, as well as a way to patronize area businesses.

Davie Tavern uses Demkota Ranch CAB aged filet that has been aged to perfection for a minimum of 21 days. If you are looking for a melt-in-your-mouth dish that you’ll go back for again and again, look no further than the 6 oz or 8 oz Dry-Aged Filet Mignon (served with stone-ground cheddar grits and roasted asparagus for a meal that leaves you full and satisfied.

And while Davie Tavern is fabulous for dining out any day of the week, it’s also perfect for celebrations, like anniversaries, graduations and birthdays.

During these winter months, with a chill in the air, check out Davie Tavern’s newly enclosed, heated, outside dining area, to make your night an experience filled with good food, lots of laughter, and smiles to remember.

LET THE FEAST BEGIN…

We started our afternoon with Davie Tavern’s Salt & Pepper Fried Calamari that was battered to a perfect crisp texture with a mild, slightly sweet flavor. It was served with a traditional Remoulade Sauce that added a rich and tangy flavor.

Next up? Their Spinach and Artichoke Dip was the most balanced savory blend of spinach, artichokes for a mildly nutty flavor, roasted red peppers, and a beautiful cheese montage for an irresistible appetizer. It was warm, cheesy, served with fresh tortilla chips, and gone within minutes!

And finally, we had a sneaky taste of their Sesame Ginger Seared Ahi Tuna Appetizer. The seared Sashimi Grade Ahi Tuna was coated in black and white sesame seeds for that crunch factor, then briefly cooked to perfection for a tender and flavorful fish. It was served with their Asian slaw, wasabi, and a freshly made Ponzu sauce that had a tangy flavor with just a hint of citrus to balance out the meaty flavor of the tuna. I thought I had gone to appetizer heaven!

SALADS

But no! Reality set back in with a delectable duo of salads that made us rethink what a salad was!

Davie Tavern’s Fried Oyster Salad was a montage of spinach, red onion, sliced mushrooms, boiled eggs, and crispy bacon served with a house made balsamic vinaigrette, then topped with five large fried oysters for a delicious surprise! Do oysters go well with salads? Hard YES! And can you go to a tavern without trying The Wedge Salad? Just like everything else, it lived up to and beyond the standards with the crispy iceberg lettuce, crumbled bacon, crisp red onions, and fresh tomatoes. The savory housemade blue cheese salad dressing added an extra creaminess and a bold flavor with chunks of pungent blue cheese.

AND REALLY, WE WERE JUST GETTING STARTED: TIME FOR ENTREES!

Moving on to the entrees, we began with a heavenly Low Country Crab Cake that was pan-sautéed to perfection and served on a toasted brioche roll with their house-made remoulade sauce, lettuce for a mild crunch, and crisp tomatoes to balance out the sweetness.

And if you’re in between choosing sides, we would recommend giving their crispy, almost caramelized Sweet Potato Fries a try. (Did I mention the caramelized part? Oh, yes, I did but it’s a taste worth saying twice, so forgive me.)

Of course, any tavern will have steaks, but Davie Tavern serves only the choicest meats that are grilled to tender perfection. The 6 oz Dry-Aged Filet Mignon mentioned above was, in a word, outstanding. Their 8 oz filet was a step up for those who could loosen their belts, and was served with garlic mashed potatoes that would make any garlic lover (Yes, please!) swoon.

There was only high praise for Davie Tavern’s Low Country Shrimp and Grits. To say this dish was fantastic may be the understatement of the year. The locally produced stone-ground grits are spiked with another local classic: Texas Pete!

It was a unique pairing - a sauce with peppery notes and cheddar cheese for that yummy, creamy soft texture. Beautifully set on top was the butterflied shrimp, portabella mushrooms, and thick bacon, crisp and golden. Every bite was filled with this reimagined shrimp and grits, with a Southern-meets-Coastal flavor!

We were about to cry “uncle” until we had a taste of their Brown Sugar Tarragon Salmon that was perfectly grilled and served with a roasted corn salsa and local cheese grits. It was slow cooked to a creamy, soft texture, and served with impeccably blanched vegetables from our local farmers.

Are you a daring and adventurous foodie?

Or do you think you are? Before you start bragging, try Davie Tavern’s Bull Burger. Go ahead - I dare you - it will be worth it. A 12 oz patty made from their signature blend of short rib, chuck, and brisket, grilled to perfection, and topped with American cheese, three slices of crispy applewood bacon, a slather of mayo, fresh lettuce, tomatoes, and red onion.

This burger was stacked larger (remember Dagwood’s sandwich?) than any I’ve seen yet, and if you can eat two of them (at the same visit), you’ll receive a free t-shirt and have your picture hung on their wall!

Now, I know you’ve had chicken sandwiches before, but this is no drive-thru fare. Davie Tavern’s Spicy Honey-Drizzled Fried Chicken Sandwich is topped with a Peanut Slaw to balance out the natural sweetness. It also has house-made pickles for that “twang” component (I’m a “pickles on” girl - what about you?). The combination was a taste sensation, and despite the fact that we were starting to get full, I ended up with a another new favorite on my list!

LET NO DESSERT GO TO WASTE! And because no meal is ever complete without a sweet, we finished out the afternoon with two made-from-scratch pies. The first was their Key Lime Pie with a Raspberry Drizzle that took me back to warmer days on the beach with the sun on my skin, and just as equally delicious was their Peanut Butter Pie that was light, rich, and creamy - perfect for a delicious winter evening treat.

THANK YOU, DAVIE TAVERN!

Thanks go to Davie tavern for the most amazing meals, wonderful service, and a pleasant afternoon that we couldn’t have imagined spending elsewhere. And if your stomach is grumbling like ours was after reading this, here is your sign to head on over to Davie Tavern and tell them that the Forsyth Mags Foodie said hi!

January 2022 | 61

Put More POW in Your Next PowerPoint Presentation!

BY DEBBIE BARR

PowerPoint is a highly effective communication tool, and most speakers use it because they want to wow their audience with a great presentation. Unfortunately, many PowerPoint presentations fall far short of that goal. Tom Whitby, a retired educator and blogger, has observed that “egregious” PowerPoint mistakes are “… often the initiator of an exodus...from the room.” If you have ever had to keep yourself from dozing off during a PowerPoint presentation, you know exactly what he is talking about!

time. In the U.S., 77 million adults have only basic or below basic literacy skills. The average American reads at the 8th - 9th grade level. One in five Americans reads at the 5th grade level or below. Literacy problems are found among all classes, races, and ethnicities. You might be surprised by the number of people in your audience who have low literacy. Whenever you can get your point across with a photo or a graphic instead of words, go with the visual.

Why do some PowerPoints excite and engage audiences while others force them to politely endure or exit? The answer is found in the not-so-secret “secret sauce” of PowerPoint creation—a few simple “do’s and don’ts” that can make all the difference for the audience. Whether you are a high school or college student, a teacher, or a business professional, keep the following seven important rules in mind when creating your next PowerPoint presentation:

RULE #3

RULE # 1

Start with the understanding that PowerPoint is NOT your message. Your “presentation” is what you say, not what you display on the PowerPoint slides. Use the PowerPoint presentation as a tool to supplement and support your message.

RULE # 2

Create slides that are more visual than text-heavy. There are three very good reasons for this rule.

Present only one main concept per slide. When you have a lot to say about your topic, organize your message into its main points and give each main concept its own slide. If necessary, continue a concept onto additional slides. The idea is to deliver your message to the audience in logical, “bite sized” pieces that are easy to digest.

RULE #4

Don’t overuse text. PowerPoint slides that are crammed full of text not only divert the audience’s attention away from the presenter and challenge those with literacy issues, they are also harder for everyone to read, and thus potentially overwhelming.

If people feel overwhelmed by the amount of text on the screen, they are more likely to tune out or even leave the room. When you must use text, don’t use complete sentences. To keep the amount of text of the screen to a minimum, some experts suggest the 5/5/5 rule: 5 or fewer words per line of text, 5 lines of text per slide, or 5 or fewer text-heavy slides in a row.

RULE #5

Use bullet points effectively. Bullet points are often the best way to flag your main points on a slide. Compared to text, they are more succinct, and often more memorable as well. However, too many bullet points can also become overwhelming to an audience. Some experts say that the more bullet points a presentation has, the less effective it is. When numerous bullet points are necessary, be sure to spread them over multiple slides.

RULE #6

The first is all about holding the attention of your audience.

People start reading a slide as soon as it appears—instead of listening to you! Second, remember the old saying that “less is more?” If you allow plenty of white space around a small amount of text or a few bullet points, the message will stand out and be more impactful. The third reason is that, for those with lower literacy, visual images trump words on a screen every

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Create slides that are pleasing to the eye.

• Colors and Fonts. PowerPoint is a visual medium, so make the most of its potential to hold the audience’s interest. Don’t turn off all the lights. In a semi-dark room, slides show up best with high contrast colors, such as a white background and dark text or yellow text on a blue background. Use a sans-serif font (no “hooks”) such as Calibri, Ariel or Tahoma. These fonts are easier to read when projected.

• Photos. Make sure each visual you display is worth the proverbial thousand words. Choose photos and graphics that are not only appropriate to your point, but also interesting to look at and of high quality. Resist the temptation to use clip art.

You want to look professional, not cheesy!

RULE #7

Never, never read your slides to the audience! Of all the mistakes commonly made with PowerPoint, this is perhaps the biggest no-no. Reading a PowerPoint presentation to an audience risks boring some people and insulting others. But if you’ve used text, bullets, fonts, colors, and visual images well, you’ll never have a need to spoon-feed your audience. They’ll stay engaged from hello to applause!

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January 2022 | 63

Retirement: Banish the Umm, Boredom

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

You mention to a working person that you’re “a little bit bored” and you get a look. You know, the one that says What? You get to do anything you want 365 days a year! Their longing for that kind of freedom is palpable. Or, you may notice the immediate, knowing head nod. This one says Of course you’re bored. How many times can you walk around the block, read the newspaper and take a nap? You can almost hear the silent “Tsk-tsk” of disapproval.

Here’s the thing: whether you painstakingly planned for retirement or arrived unexpectedly, you may sometimes find that, yeah, you’re bored. It’s not a crime! Remember that you are a capable person who can hone skills and take concrete steps that will help you to “banish boredom.” Consider these:

ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR EXPERIENCE FOR WHAT IT IS If you are feeling bored – and maybe discouraged, frustrated, or guilty about feeling this way – practice self-respect by owning it.

You can’t change something that you’re hell bent on denying. The faster you honor what you are experiencing, the sooner you can get on with doing something about it.

CREATE ROUTINES Start by reminding yourself that YOU are the boss. Then work on creating some structure and building in some routine. Maybe you first decide to get up at the same time each day because it’s a healthy habit to adopt. You then consider building in some necessary movement like a walk around the block, or a yoga class three days a week. Decide which days you’ll do the food shopping and so on. Before you know it, you will have the beginning of a routine that you can add to and subtract from because you are in charge.

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On the other hand, your boredom remedy might look more like this:

EMBRACE THE FREEDOM FROM ROUTINES As a baby boomer, I grew up in an age when parents let their kids out the door on a summer’s morning and said, “Be home in time for dinner.” Without formal playdates, we were on our own to make what we would of our unstructured time. There’s something pretty awesome about that, so why not relish it once again in retirement? This approach can be especially effective for people who have a passion they may have put on the shelf during all of those working years. Now is the time to give it its due.

MAKE DATES WITH PEOPLE – LOTS OF THEM Staying connected with others is vital to both emotional and physical well being. Take the initiative to make “play dates” and lunch dates.

Don’t rely on the flimsy, non-committal “We should get together sometime.” Schedule specific times to talk and to see each other in person.

TRY NEW THINGS – AND OFTEN Dip your toe in the water and try something new. I know people who have taken dance classes and art classes; others who have taken up birdwatching, joined a hiking group, and even someone who decided to learn how to build her own greenhouse. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by experimenting because you now know that if you change your mind, the boss won’t mind!

HELP OTHERS There’s a very specific sense of fulfillment and satisfaction that comes from giving of yourself.

When you think about it, everyone can use some type of help. Start with your friends and family, move on to your church, or simply pick up the phone and offer to volunteer somewhere.

There is so much good you can do!

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January 2022 | 65

Where The Artist Shares Her Passion!

BY MARTIE EMORY

Ashley’s new space is comfortable and relaxing, and she enjoys providing drinks and music to inspire positive conversation during appointments. You also won’t find her dressed in fancy attire or wearing heels – she’s a down-toearth soul who’s much more at home enjoying her clients’ company in a casual setting, and getting to know each person’s story – and of course, their hair!

A shiny new year brings with it time for reflection, and for Ashley Herrick, a new marriage, a new salon location, and her enthusiastic passion for life have certainly come full circle!

A true artist of color and style, Ashley has managed to blend a successful following with her personal commitment to taking time for herself. She’s a big cheerleader in encouraging her clients to do the same, and if you’re also looking for a fresh start and a new look in January, Ashley is your girl!

For starters, Ashley relocated herself to a private suite at JC Salons in Winston-Salem this past year.

“My move has given me the opportunity to brand myself in my own space, rather than trying to place myself in someone else’s salon business,” she explains. “I’ve been able to create a space for my clients to enjoy, and the one-on-one experience has been great so far!”

Her business has grown so much that one of the biggest challenges has been finding enough evenings for all her working clients!

Ashley says she’s beyond grateful to be as busy as she is. She knows she’s a wife and animal lover first and foremost, and that home life she cherishes got even sweeter this past year, as she also got married.

“I am blessed to have married a graphic designer, and he spent a lot of time creating a new logo for me,” says Ashley. “We plan to eventually have t-shirts made for clients as well. My goal in my new space is to break that typical ‘salon atmosphere’ mold that can be intimidating to a lot of women.”

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“All of my clients become my friends,” she notes.

“I learn about their families, and they learn about mine. My clients have become my biggest support system and it only gets better with each new client that sits in my chair!”

She also stresses with her new salon setting providing a one-on-one experience, the conversations are always private, and her full attention goes to one single person at a time.

Ashley will be the first to tell a new client she’s not your typical stylist. She’s an artist of simple tastes and with that, she loves to focus on “lived in” color, and also prefers styles that look effortlessly natural on the client.

“I love taking someone’s natural hair color and enhancing it,” says Ashley. “Whether it’s covering gray, blending gray, or adding dimension and movement, I love it all! I do quite a bit of balayage and highlights, too, and those services are my favorites.”

Now that it’s January, Ashley is eager to meet new clients and encourage them to shake things up a bit! Are you thinking of a new look for 2022?

One of her favorite tasks is taking virgin hair and enhancing it with a blended balayage or highlight.

First on her list is always spending ample time consulting with a new client to make sure they are both on the same page color and style wise, and ready to make a change the client is totally comfortable wearing!

We asked Ashley for her top five tips for hair care, as we all resolve to pamper ourselves with a little extra self-love this year!

• My most important reminder is to make time for yourself! Whatever that means for you – and however you choose to put yourself first – do it!

• To start a new hair care regime off right, cut down on heat use and definitely add a heat protectant to your routine. (Ashley has several excellent options in the salon!)

• Pamper yourself by using professional hair care products! “It really does make a world of difference when it comes to the health of your hair, and how your hair will respond to color treatment.”

• Only shampoo your hair once or twice a week.

Get creative on how to make your styles last longer … and your hair will thank you!

• See a professional stylist for your color! After all, your hair is something you literally wear every single day … don’t neglect the one accessory you can’t ever take off!

Always accepting new clients and happily making new friends, Ashley’s new salon is located at Salons by JC, Second Floor, Suite 4, 615 St. George Square Court, in Winston-Salem. Reach her at 336-608-7924, follow her on Instagram @ ashleyhhairstudio, or book an appointment online at loveyourhairbyashley.square.site/.

PHOTO BY JODIE BRIM

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January 2022 | 67

Types of

BY AMY HILL

Peop le You Meet

n o l a S r at the Hai

THE PRETTY RECEPTIONIST

THE STYLIST

You’ve been waiting for this day for weeks since you booked your hair appointment. Your dead ends and dark roots are in dire need of some TLC, and you’ve cleared your Saturday morning schedule solely for the salon. Since you’re about to have your cut and color, you don’t bother washing your hair or dressing up to head to your appointment. When you walk into the waiting room, you’re greeted by a beautiful receptionist at the front desk who is perfectly put together. You immediately feel ashamed of how little effort you made to look presentable. You’re convinced she’s judging you for looking so homely, but you remind yourself that once your appointment is over, she’ll see your new hair and know that you’re not a complete slob.

Your stylist is finally ready to get started on your mane and takes you back to her chair.

As the two of you discuss the new television shows you’ve been watching recently as she spreads goop all over your strands, she asks you to lean your head forward. A few seconds later, she has to remind you to lean forward again. You’re filled with guilt and are convinced she’s forever repulsed by you and your insubordination. You make it your mission to make sure she never has to remind you to lean your head forward again for the rest of your appointment.

THE SOFA SHARER As you sit on the lobby sofa and flip through the latest issue of Glamour on the coffee table, another client enters the waiting room and sits at the other end of the sofa. You’re tempted to smile and say hello, but you’re wary of finding yourself entangled in an unwanted conversation. Instead, you keep to yourself and your magazine. Your mind oscillates between feeling obligated to make small talk and despising the thought of exchanging pleasantries with a stranger on the sofa every few seconds. You remain silent and run the risk of seeming rude, but it’s a risk you’re willing to take.

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THE CHATTY CATHY As you’re sitting in your cape focusing on adequately leaning your head forward, a client sits down at the chair next to yours as another stylist begins working her magic.

When the two begin talking, you can’t help but eavesdrop as they discuss which one of their mutual friends is going through a divorce, or which contestant they want to win the current season of The Bachelor.

They seem to have such a great rapport, you think to yourself. I bet my stylist wishes I were more like that client. I bet she can’t wait for me to leave.

YOUR STYLIST’S NEXT CLIENT When your appointment comes to an end, your stylist swivels you around in the chair for you to admire her work. Of course, you love what she’s done with your hair, but you’re uncomfortable with showing excitement. After putting on a show of satisfaction for your stylist, she walks you to the front desk to pay the receptionist. On your way to the desk, she greets another client in the waiting room with a warm welcome. You know it’s irrational, but you can’t help but feel a bit envious and insecure. Are they going to gossip about how awkward I am after I leave? To compensate for your perceived social failure and to fulfill your deep-rooted psychological urge to peopleplease, you leave an excessive tip in hopes of receiving approval from your stylist. You’re not opposed to buying someone’s love and respect if it means you leave with great hair. After all, she is the best stylist you’ve found in years.

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January 2022 | 69

Try Breaking a Few Decorating Rules “First of all, there really aren’t rules! That is, the decorating police will not arrest you for making a mistake in your décor. The neighbors might talk if you painted the whole house orange, and the authorities might object to a fire hazard. But most of us aren’t in danger of these extremes. What we want are a few basic guidelines for tasteful and inexpensive decorating.” ~ E. Barnes and Y. Brogger

As a decorator I have my own rules of thumb when it comes to decorating. I always try to keep in mind that these are rules of thumb and guidelines for me to use...not rules written in stone. Many folks have preconceived decorating rules that came from books on interior design, magazines, HGTV, a friend, or even their mothers. For example, so many times clients have told me, “I read somewhere or someone told me that pictures should be hung at eye level”, but eye level for me (5’ 7”) and eye level for my brother (6’3”), are two very different things. A rule of thumb or guideline I use: Artwork that will be viewed while standing, like in a hallway, should be hung approximately 60” from the floor to the middle of the height of the picture.

Artwork hung in a room where people will almost always be seated should be 56”to 57” from the middle of the height of the picture to the floor.

Adjust accordingly but this is the average and should be comfortable for most people.

A while back I came across an article I previously saved; “Decorating Rules Made To Be Broken”

by Emilie Barnes and Yoli Brogger. I am sure you have heard some of these “decorating rules” and would agree with me....they may need to be broken.

Don’t use white….it shows dirt. As long as they’re washable and bleachable, pure white slipcovers, curtains, towels and rugs can actually be the most practical accessories of all. However, use care when making everything white because it may not always be practical.

It all has to match. In fact, a mix of styles, colors and periods of furniture can be visually exciting.

Just try to have a common element, such as a color or design motif, to tie them all together.

Too much “matchy” can be boring.

You need a round cloth for a round table.

Draped beautifully, or even tied up at the corners, a square or rectangular cloth will do just fine on any table.

You need a sofa, a chair and a coffee table. Try to get rid of your preconceived notions about what you “ought” to have in a room and think how the room is to be used. Remember, function is the main consideration.

study a dark color. The dark color can emphasize its cozy character and make it more interesting. Painting a large room a pale color can emphasize its airiness. Think of the statement you want to make, not what rules you’ve read.

When in doubt, use beige; it goes with everything. The grain of truth in this common assumption is that neutral colors can be very relaxing and usually blend easily with other colors. Beige is far from the only neutral! Any “earth color”…white, black, gray, brown, terra-cotta and especially green and blue….can serve the same purpose and is far more interesting.

Anything goes. Break a few rules but keep in mind that the principles of balance, harmony, and comfort still prevail.

The sofa goes against the wall.

Not always! Instead of lining up the furniture square against the wall, you might try setting some pieces at an angle or creating small conversational groupings away from the walls.

Do you need help in the New Year making wise decorating decisions for your home? Give ReDESIGNS by Ava a call to schedule an appointment.

Paint small rooms pale colors to make them look bigger. It’s not necessarily bad to paint your tiny

Ava Lewandowski,

Interior Redesign Industry Specialist

Break a few ‘decorator’ rules of thumb in 2022. Enjoy your home and be thankful. May you look for and experience God’s goodness and faithfulness in the coming year.

Ava Lewandowski,

Interior Redesign Industry Specialist

10 Reasons

People Choose ReDESIGNS by Ava: 1. They’ve seen the results on TV Home makeover shows or in a friends house.

2. They want a fresh, designer look but haven’t been able to create it.

3. They want great results without great expense.

4. They don’t know where to place the “old” furniture in a new house.

6. They are blending 2 households of furnishings and want professional help with what to keep and how to make it work.

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7. They desire a home that feels good and looks good yet reflects who they are.

8. They want rooms to function better.

9. They want to prepare their home to maximize market appeal for a quick, top dollar sale.

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10. They believe that when 5. They don’t want to you want professional make an expensive results you hire purchase a professional. they’ll regret.

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photoartistrybymelinda.com 336.407.3655 January 2022 | 71

What Do You Do with Your Lessons?

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

There I was, plunked down in the driver’s seat, waiting for the short text that would tell me it was my turn to be seen. Why hadn’t I thought this through? It was going on twoand-a-half hours at this point, and I had made two completely avoidable errors: first, I didn’t swing by the Starbucks to break in that new gift card by fueling up. Second, I left ALL of my reading material at home. This is precisely why I rarely clean out my car. Gone was the hand lotion, the three magazines, the book I’m devouring for Book Club. Sure, I had my cell phone, but the battery was low and, let’s be honest, it’s just not the same.

I resorted to walking around the parking lot, dodging the debris and a cluttered landscape of discarded face masks. Bored and annoyed, I grew restless. Let’s get the show on the road already! I thought. The little pesky voice in my head spoke without being prompted:

A lot like Siri, she was ticking me off so I shut her down, then grabbed my dying phone to distract me. Once I settled down, I thought about what she said. It was undeniable: she was 100% right.

I reached my hands out in front of me as the indisputable confirmation of her wisdom. My left hand - wounded a few months back - had never really healed. No matter, I compensated with my right and carried on. But when I nearly crushed the middle finger on my right, dominant hand in trying to manually close the garage door, I was sunk. I mean, I cook, I clean, I garden, I do yoga, I mess around with Pilates and, let’s not forget, I write for a living. Okay, so instead do what? Use the microwave more and ignore the accumulating dust bunnies. But could I, really?

Hi, it’s me again.

C’mon, cut me some slack! I imagine you’re not here to offer a solution.

Of course, you do know that it is your impatience that landed you here in the first place.

The solution is in your hands.

I know! But do you have to keep reminding me? I told you: I KNOW.

It is good to see that you are thinking of a workaround, but aren’t you missing something?

You may know, but you haven’t learned.

Very funny.

You’re right. I also need my hands to style my hair, put on my makeup…

All true, but you continue to miss the point.

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I do?

What got you into this mess?

Well, the first time, with my left hand…

No, no, no, the mechanics of what happened are less important.

I am referring to the WHY behind this mess you’ve created.

Oh, that.

Until you learn this lesson, you will continue to pay a price for your impatience.

Sometimes I hate her, I do. But she is my higher wisdom, and she is RIGHT: I may know that I need to slow down, but until I do, I will repeat my mistakes.

As I get older, the price is steeper. Not to mention the recovery time!

What do you do with your lessons?

Are you listening to your inner wisdom, higher power, she-who-knows-better?

I hope so. And just so you know, you are not alone on this learning journey. I am right there with you, sister!

Accent Prone

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January 2022 | 73

OOPER

BY KAREN C

s e i v o M t a e Eight GrNorth Carolina Filmed in

COLD MOUNTAIN (2003) Locations: Pisgah National Forest

Based on the 1997 bestselling novel by Charles Frazier, Cold Mountain recounts the story of a wounded Confederate soldier (Inman) Jude Law at the end of the Civil War. Inman’s main desire is to get home to his sweetheart Ada Monroe (Nicole Kidman) with whom he has only shared a few moments, but to whom he still feels a deep connection. His journey is perilous and long and the people waiting back home do not have an easy time of it either.

SAFE HAVEN (2013)

Locations: Southport, Blue Ridge Parkway North Carolina (especially the Wilmington area) has often been called “Hollywood of the East.” Considering how geographically diverse our state is, it’s really no surprise that filmmakers choose it again and again for all or part of their filming locations.

From the dense green forests of the Blue Ridge Mountains to the scenic waters of its many beaches, some of the most critically acclaimed films have been made right here in our fair state.

DIRTY DANCING (1987)

BULL DURHAM (1988) Locations: Durham and surrounding areas, Asheville Bull Durham’s Crash Davis (Kevin Costner), a twelve-year veteran in minor league baseball, is sent to Durham as the team’s catcher to educate their star player, pitcher, ‘Nuke’ LaLoosh (Tim Robbins). Comedy and a love triangle ensue as Annie Savoy (Susan Sarandon) is dedicated to her tradition of sticking with only one player a season, but also attracted to another.

Locations: Lake Lure

THE GREEN MILE (1999)

Baby (Jennifer Grey) dreams of joining the Peace Corps. She is clearly not happy about spending the summer at Kellerman’s resort in the Catskills with her parents and prima donna sister whose main concern is whether or not she packed the right shoes.

Everything begins to change when the resort’s dance instructor, Johnny (Patrick Swayze), chooses Baby as his new partner (out of desperation), and the two begin to fall in love.

Locations: Blowing Rock, Moses H. Cone Memorial Park Paul Edgecomb (Tom Hanks) had never encountered someone like John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan), a massive man convicted of brutally killing two young sisters. Coffey possesses the size and strength to kill anyone, but not the personality. Coffey also seemed to have an extraordinary, supernatural gift. Edgecomb begins to question Coffey’s guilt.

A young woman, Katie (Julianne Hough) with a mysterious past lands in Southport, North Carolina, from Boston where her bond with widower Alex (Josh Duhamel) forces her to confront the dark secret that haunts her. Safe Haven is the film adaptation of a popular Nicholas Sparks’ novel.

DAYS OF THUNDER (1990) Locations: Charlotte

Racing brings Cole Trickle (Tom Cruise) to North Carolina to race in the Winston Cup at Charlotte Motor Speedway. A rivalry turned to friendship between Trickle and Rowdy Burns (Michael Rooker) leads to a tough decision. A potential injury results in a love interest with neurosurgeon Dr. Claire Lewicki (Nicole Kidman).

THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI (2017)

Locations: Sylva, Asheville, Black Mountain Mildred Hayes (Frances McDormand) decides to take things into her own hands after her daughter is murdered. She paints three signs leading into her town with a controversial message directed at William Willoughby (Woody Harrelson), the town’s chief of police.

THE LAST OF THE MOHICANS (1992) Locations: Chimney Rock

James Fenimore Cooper’s classic novel appeared in 1826, sixty-nine years after the events of the French and Indian War that is its subject. In the 1992 film version, the last members of a dying Native American tribe, the Mohicans, Chingachgook (Russell Means), Uncas (Eric Schweig), and his adopted half-white brother Hawkeye (Daniel Day-Lewis) are living in peace alongside British colonists. When the daughters Cora and Alice Monru (Madeleine Stowe, Jodhi May) of a British colonel are kidnapped by a traitorous scout, Hawkeye and Uncas must rescue them in the midst of a deadly military conflict which they wanted no part of: the French and Indian War.

JUNEBUG (2005)

Locations: Winston Salem, Greensboro

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Art dealer Madeleine (Embeth Davidtz) has traveled to North Carolina to both pursue an artist and meet her husband’s family, who have an interesting dynamic (to say the least). Together with her husband George (Allesandro Nivola), she becomes acquainted with the family which includes his pregnant sister-in-law Ashley (Amy Adams). Madeline gains greater understanding into George’s past and personality through getting to know his eccentric family.

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Hip Chics

January 2022 | 75

4 Reasons Why Being Bored Can Be a Good Thing

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

“I’m bored.” All of our heads shake in unison as we agree that we have muttered this phrase at least once in our lives, no matter our age. These common two words simply show that you may not know what to do at a certain moment. Whether it is five minutes or five hours, boredom is an emotional state that could mean you aren’t satisfied with your current task or the task isn’t making an impact on you. Symptoms include a limited attention span, feelings of emptiness and frustration, and a lack of interest. Fatigue and feeling nervous are other symptoms of boredom.

There are ways to overcome boredom. You could start with finding out why you are bored in the first place. Is it due to laziness or are you feeling unmotivated? From there, you could help to resolve this by getting some rest, setting goals, and creating plans. Other options include changing your surroundings and refocusing your energy.

However, being bored isn’t such a bad thing.

Research shows there are health benefits to boredom. These empty moments allow a person to slow down, unplug, and reconnect with themselves in addition to other benefits.

First, your brain is able to rest and improve your overall brain health. Your mind slows down and recharges. Neuroscientist and lecturer at the Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, Alicia Walf, has proven in research that it is “critical for brain health to let yourself be bored from time to time”. Think about it: your brain works 24/7, absorbing sounds, sights, tastes, and much more that are around you. Boredom provides your brain the opportunity to nod off and absorb information at a slower pace. If you are able, get outside the next time you are bored. Research has shown that being in nature gives your brain a better change of focus and the chance to get some mental rest.

Secondly, boredom brings out the creativity in people. When a person is bored, they are looking for something to do or something to stimulate their mind. When that doesn’t happen, our brains take over and start daydreaming. Who knows, you may be able to come up with a new invention, story, or a plan for dinner while you are daydreaming. All you need to do is just not stress and let your mind run free.

Boredom can also help you be a better person and engage in selfreflection. During these down moments, a person is often trying to find meaning, usually about themselves. Think inward and reflect on your current circumstances, values, and behaviors. It is a great time to possibly readjust your attitudes, make changes, and improvements in your life. Maybe you always wanted to become more charitable.

Therefore, use the time you are bored to create a plan and strategy to make that happen. Also, your relationships with friends and family can improve. Neuroscientists have found that when our brains aren’t busy with other thoughts, we can focus on our social interactions and relationships with others. Our activities soon turn into ways to reach out and reconnect with our loved ones.

Lastly, being bored is good for your mental health. Stepping away from work, social media, emails, etc. can provide an escape from the daily grind. This all goes back to the rest, recharging, and turning your mind off for a little bit. However, it is important to correctly engage in these benefits, because, on the flip side, boredom has been linked to causing depression and anxiety.

Psychology lecturer at the University of Central Lancashire in England and author Sandi Mann stated in the TIME article, “Being Bored Can Be Good for You - If You Do It Right” that it is important not to confuse boredom with relaxation. To make the most out of being bored, Mann suggests taking part in an activity that is stress-free and requires little attention. These activities include walking outside, meditating, sitting with your eyes closed, journaling, killing time while waiting for an appointment, or doing a routine task, such as washing dishes. These activities allow for your mind to redirect its focus to find another interest.

The next time you are bored, don’t worry about it and feel as if you need to be doing something. Instead, use this time to embrace the boredom. You may be surprised at what new ideas and thoughts you’ll discover.

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Mint Milanos-toss Doritos-toss Soda-down the drain Pasta-I shake the box thinking of the cajun shrimp pasta that brings my family so much joy.

Cupcake mix-I think of the nights that my daughter and I would whip up impromptu cupcakes together.

My husband comes in and bypasses the mess, grabbing the Chex Mix. “Grab a snack! Let’s watch the game!”

New Year’s Resolutions

BY GEN CONDON

I dust off the elliptical, pull out my sneakers (while battling the cobwebs that have grown all throughout them) and look at my workout clothes that most definitely will not fit over my thighs.

Despite how they look I wiggle and jump, forcing them on. Looking in the mirror, I feel like a busted can of biscuits.

My husband passes by.

“Those new? You look nice!”

I groan as I feel the circulation slowly leaving my legs.

I look at the food surrounding me on the kitchen floor. The calories that made these workout pants too tight. The chocolatey goodness that did absolutely nothing for my complexion.

I think back to last year, this exact same time, and how motivated and determined I was to drop some weight. Now, I feel nothing but dread.

No motivation.

Pure exhaustion already.

Why does it have to be like this?

In my feelings, I grab the Milanos off the floor and go snuggle up to my husband.

Playfully, he grabs my legs and gives them a squeeze. “I love these things.”

He says it in passing, but he doesn’t realize the impact his words have on me.

He loves me. Right now, as I am. The extra pounds. My legs that have gotten a bit bigger. Heck, they even jiggle a little when I walk.

But his words, they comfort me.

Why doesn’t he see what I see?

“Maybe I won’t diet this year. Just find balance and work out a few days a week.” I take two cookies and close up the bag.

The jiggle.

Control.

The extra baby weight that I never could get rid of.

“That’s the way to do. Don’t stress yourself.

You made two babies. Your body is going to be different.”

Then I move on to the rest of the house to prepare for yet another New Year’s Resolution of losing weight and exercise.

I sit in agony as I sift through my cabinets.

78 | ForsythWoman.com

Different.

It can be hard to accept different. To see ourselves evolve and look at

pictures where maybe our outfits were a bit more put together, our hair and makeup on point and we looked a bit more well rested.

We often associate different or change with negativity, but we can’t negate how often different is beautiful, unique and holds so much promise and happiness in its imperfections.

As a society, we project these images and thoughts that we have to look a certain way.

That every year we have to have some New Year’s Resolutions that will make us feel bad if we don’t fulfill it because - well - life just happens.

There are birthdays to celebrate, and you don’t want to miss out on the cake.

Vacations where you want to try local cuisines and get adventurous.

And nights where cupcakes with your daughter just have to be made.

And pasta dishes that your family absolutely adore deserve to grace your table.

There’ll be laughter.

Joy. Feelings of happiness. Not dread.

And the little extra meat on your thighs holds these memories and moments with each glorious jiggle.

For once, don’t feel beholden to making a New Year’s Resolution. Focus on being a better version of yourself. Finding balance.

Happiness.

By all means, dust off the sneakers. Pull out the workout clothes and maybe have two cookies instead of four. But don’t hang it all on a specific day. Do it because you want to be better. Stronger. Healthier.

So, for me, there will be no resolutions this year. Just a promise to myself to enjoy moments without feeling sorry for who I’ve become both physically and in spirit because I am who I am supposed to be. And for the memories each day brings, I am thankful jiggly thighs and all.

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It’s Never Too Late to be Good to Yourself

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

I often see my 93-year-old neighbor outside picking up her daily newspaper and stopping to take in her lush and lovely flowers. I’d like to think that this daily ritual is something my neighbor does to welcome and celebrate the day. Something she does to be good to herself.

When I was growing up, I heard “Be good to others” and “Be kind to strangers.” But the message about self-love was light, if not missing. Eventually, I learned to be good to myself, and honestly, it wasn’t easy; it required me to reframe “indulgence” or “pampering” as self-care, or simply, “being good to myself.” Wherever you are on your journey to “being good to yourself,” know this: it is never too late to send a healthy dose of love inward. Here are a few ideas on how to keep your inner well full:

THINK OF YOURSELF AS YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND How you treat your BFF is how you can learn to treat yourself.

You are kind, forgiving, compassionate, and generous to her, right? Well then? Start sending all of that good stuff inward.

WRITE DOWN THE THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF THAT MAKE YOU AWESOME! If you find yourself stuck in a long pause, consider what the people who love and care about you would say. Or pretend that you are on the outside, observing this person, you.

Come up with at least ten qualities or characteristics that you can appreciate about yourself.

IDENTIFY TEN THINGS THAT BRING YOU JOY AND INCLUDE SEVERAL EACH DAY I am not talking about a ten-day Hawaiian hiatus. I mean simple joys or pleasures that bring a smile to your face, appeal to your senses, or make you feel good about your day. I recently purchased two diffusers that I fill with essential oils. One resides in my office – where I do my writing – and the other, in my sunroom – where I kick up my feet and indulge in my reading. Simple and joyful? Yes!

FORGIVE, FORGIVE, FORGIVE This one is heavy, I know. But here’s the thing: we all have regrets, some large, many small. When we can make our peace with the things we did and didn’t do, we release pain and create an opening for learning from our regrets and mistakes. The same is true of the grudges we may hold toward others. By letting go, we free ourselves.

LAUGH AT YOURSELF…BUT DO IT WITH LOVE As a recovering perfectionist, I also know that this can be very hard to do. We see our shortcomings and errors as fatal flaws, deficiencies we should be ashamed of. That framing is the opposite of what it means to be good to ourselves. Look around you: no one is perfect. No one.

When you can laugh at your quirks and foibles, you take a major step forward in being good to yourself.

CUT OUT THE NEGATIVITY Start by re-reading the paragraph above, then take a good, honest look at what’s fueling the negativity in your life. Certain people, media, situations? Make a conscious effort to skinny-back on what brings you down. And when you are the source, catch yourself, forgive yourself, laugh at yourself…and move on. You’ve got this!

80 | ForsythWoman.com

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH CARING PEOPLE People who are positive and loving toward us reinforce that we are worthy of love and respect. They act as a mirror that reflects what’s good about us. And by doing so, they remind us that it’s never, ever too late to be good to ourselves.

Let’s teach the next generation this important lesson.

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January 2022 | 81

g n i d a e R f o e v o

L e th r o F

BY JEAN

I was 19 or 20 at the time, a sophomore or junior in college. I had stopped by the house of a guy I was seeing and waited around while he took care of one thing or another. As I took in the environment I was baffled. From room to room, wherever my eyes wandered there wasn’t a book in sight. I mean there was no reading material of any kind, anywhere. This was back in the dark ages when there were no cell phones and certainly no electronic readers. My head was spinning: How does anyone live without books? A house with no books meant a family with no books. I didn’t get it.

LOOK TO THE PAST The absence of the written word in any of its manifestations begs a bigger question: Why do some people love to read and others don’t? Sociologist Wendy Griswold found that 20% of the US population spends a lot of their leisure time reading. But why?

Part of the answer lies in three factors that influence the lifelong reading habit: • Children who are adept at going from the printed word to words in the mind become “fluent coders.” They often have parents who read to and with them from an early age.

• These same children tend to have a wide range of understanding about the world because parents contribute information, clarity and exposure to new concepts.

• There is a motivational factor as well – the child has a positive attitude about reading and about herself as a reader.

MARIE

ON

JOHNS

FAST FORWARD TO THE ADULT READER Here’s one very good reason to nurture the reading habit: recent research concluded that reading reduces stress levels by a whopping 68% (that makes sense to me!) while strengthening the mind and improving both memory and thinking skills. When the Pew Research Center asked readers what they liked most about delving into a book, responses varied: • 26% said learning, gaining knowledge, and discovering information.

• 15% mentioned escaping reality, becoming immersed in another world, and using their imaginations.

• 12% said they liked the entertainment value, the drama of good stories, the suspense of watching a good plot unfold.

• 12% said they enjoyed relaxing while reading and having quiet time.

Others mentioned gaining spiritual enrichment, being mentally challenged, exploring new, interesting topics and experiencing the physical properties of books made the list. One respondent added: “I love being able to get outside myself.”

PARENTS CAN ENCOURAGE A LOVE OF READING It is generally understood that children who love reading do better in school and have an expanded vocabulary. Many add that children who are avid readers have an expanded sense of the world and are perhaps more empathetic towards others. As a parent, here are a few things you can you do to encourage the reading bug in your home: • Make books and other reading material highly visible. Don’t restrict them to your nightstand or your desk; put that content where kids can see that it is integral to your life. Besides, books make a beautiful esthetic statement!

• Talk about reading during daily activities: while eating dinner together and in the car on the way to soccer practice.

Share with your kids what you are currently reading and why it is exciting to you.

• Bring books along on your visits to the beach, your local pool, and yes, ahem, maybe even to soccer practice?

• Give books as birthday presents to your children and to their friends.

• Make regular visits to our local bookstores, resellers, and library branches.

Happy reading!

Homestead Hills

Novant Health

January 2022 | 83

Exceptional Young Women in the Community:

Meet Ainsley Williams

BY AMY HILL

Mount Tabor High School senior Ainsley Williams knew from a young age that she had a knack for the arts, having selftaught herself how to sew, crochet, and embroider. With the help of a supportive family who encouraged her to embrace her creative side and enroll in various art courses, Ainsley has used her artistic talents to help her community, classmates, and fellow athletes.

When Ainsley’s senior class was searching for ideas for their Homecoming t-shirts, Ainsley’s classmates knew who to turn to.

Ainsley’s designing and drawing abilities were so popular among her peers that she was given the opportunity to design the shirts, as well as her field hockey team shirts and the senior t-shirts. By starting out with a paper drawing, she is able to digitally design her shirts using an app called procreate, which helps bring her ideas to life. She also runs a small business through an Instagram account where she creates sweatshirts and thrifted clothing by painting unique designs and patterns. In 2020, she won the Safe Sober T-Shirt Contest hosted by Daggett Schuler Law, which allowed her the opportunity to design clothing for a cause near and dear to her heart.

84 | ForsythWoman.com

Safe Sober aims to educate youth on the dangers of alcohol and drug use.

Given the increase in isolation over the last year, Ainsley believes it is especially important to relay the Safe & Sober message in stressful times such as the present. According to Ainsley, “Feeling isolated can make people susceptible to making irresponsible decisions. It’s always important to make wise decisions, because you never know when something can go wrong or get out of control. It’s always been in my nature to look out for anyone who might be under the influence of a substance.”

At Mount Tabor High School, Ainsley plays lacrosse, field hockey, and is involved in the Tabor Girls’ Club, where she and her fellow club members pay club dues and work to assist those in need. The Tabor Girls’ Club worked alongside their classmates to help pull off Mt. Tabor’s annual rummage sale, which takes months of preparation and planning. By relying on members of the community to donate clothing, accessories, and various household items to be sold, the Tabor Girls’ Club is able to donate the rummage sale’s earnings to those in need while making memories and gaining valuable retail experience.

As a member of New Philadelphia Moravian Church, Ainsley has also been given the opportunity to volunteer in a remote village in Alaska. During the summer before her sophomore year of high school, she and her fellow church members spent a week hosting Vacation Bible School and Sunday school classes for children in the village, which was one of the most rewarding experiences of her life thus far. Shocked at how isolated and rural the Alaskan village was, she felt blessed to be embarking on the trip of a lifetime, where she was able to volunteer, worship, and build relationships in the stunning Alaskan wilderness. Ainsley and her family love volunteering with their church and are always looking for opportunities to give back.

In her spare time, Ainsley enjoys spending time with her friends, teaching children’s classes at church, and dining at local eateries such as The Loop. She has a passion for shopping at thrift stores and can frequently be found rummaging the racks of secondhand shops throughout the area, with her favorite being any Goodwill location she can find. After high school, Ainsley hopes to attend N.C. State University’s College of Design, and aspires to one day land a career where she can allow her creativity to flourish.

Whether she’s designing clothes, displays, or posters, Ainsley hopes to make a living while simultaneously expressing herself through art.

iHeart Media

Your Authentic Self: Be More of Who You Are

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

“Be yourself; ever y Why did I say that? That’s not what I believe.

Why did I go along with that?

That’s not what I want.

Why did I do that? That’s not who I am.

one e lse is a

Is there any human past puberty who hasn’t experienced the sigh of the soul or the gut punch that is the consequence of being inauthentic? When you think about it, every moment of inauthenticity reinforces a self-talk that says, “You are not okay as you really are.” When we hide our true self from others, the long-term impact can be a sense of loneliness, shame, and low self-esteem. And yet, we act in inauthentic ways because we may: • feel compelled to please others, so that we are liked • seek the approval of others so that we are accepted • go along to get along and avoid conflict • feel the need to live up to some external standard to feel better about ourselves Given the explosion of social media and FOMO - the fear of missing out - we may have even lost touch with who we are as we feel pressured to post ad nauseum about the awesomeness that is our life. Studies show that people who are authentic are happier and have higher self-esteem. To me, that’s another way of saying that they are at peace with themselves. And that makes sense because authentic people live in a way that is both true and responsible to themselves and others.

They experience joy and meaning because they: • speak their opinions honestly, and in a healthy way • make decisions that align with their values and beliefs • pursue their passions • listen to their inner voice to guide them • allow themselves to be vulnerable and open-hearted • set boundaries and walk away from toxic situations

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lready

taken” –

What are you waiting for?

Here are a few key things you can do to live more authentically*:

Oscar Wilde

Place a priority on the people and activities that matter most to you. Walk away from toxic people and situations that don’t serve you.

Notice when you are feeling self-conscious about how you look or how you are coming across. Check in with your real self and the values you want to live by.

Seek to spend more time with the people in your life who live authentically, are true to who they are, and support your journey.

Be mindful of your words. Be confident when expressing what you need. In conversation, maintain eye contact, listen to others, and don’t shy away from saying ‘No’ when doing so supports your truth and your priorities.

Practice good self-care. Plan your day in a way that focuses on your priorities, and make sure to include time for the healthy activities that keep you going: exercise, meditation, sleep.

Give yourself a break. Everyone needs to get away from their routine from time to time. Whether that’s planning a date with yourself, going away for a weekend, or simply trying something totally new, you will feel refreshed and renewed.

Get serious about understanding what drives you so that you can identify dreams and goals that support your authentic self. For example, consider your purpose, values, and interests, as well as external things like money, recognition, and lifestyle.

Here’s the thing about being authentic: not only will you like and respect yourself more, your connections with the people in your life will be genuine and therefore, more satisfying. *Based on the work of Lyn Christian, SoulSalt Inc.

Jodie Brim

ie Jod

Brim, Owne r

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S T Y L I N G January 2022 | 87

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

Finding Your Calm & Destressing through MindfulnesS

Life can be stressful.

It can be hectic and busy at times. We are on the move all the time and things don’t slow down. A vacation or just a break may seem like a luxury, one that may never come. Yet, there is a way to destress and relax, even if it is just for a few minutes, multiple times a day by practicing the concept of mindfulness.

According to the MerriamWebster dictionary, mindfulness or mindful, can be defined as “being aware of one’s surroundings, your emotions, and mental state by focusing on the present moment.”

It is a therapeutic technique that has been proven to produce many health benefits. In addition, the concept has been considered as a type of meditation used to reduce stress.

Practicing mindfulness allows one to acknowledge and process feelings, thoughts, and body movements, while detaching from reality for a few moments and redirecting one’s attention.

The benefits of mindfulness impact a person’s overall wellness, mental, and physical health.

Mindfulness can help with specific things, such as stress relief, anxiety, chronic pain, heart disease, depression, hypertension, and insomnia.

These benefits affect adults, college students, and children. For students, mindfulness has been shown to improve their academic success, better social interactions, improve social-emotional learning, and emotion regulation. No matter your age, you can practice being mindful with these simple techniques.

• Start small at first as mindfulness can take some time to get used to. Begin with sitting quietly, back straight, closing your eyes, and focusing on your natural breathing with a sitting meditation exercise. You can also sit in a chair with your feet flat on the ground if that is more comfortable.

Breathe through your nose. Place your hand on your stomach and feel the in and out pattern of your breathing.

You can also repeat a silent word or mantra as you go.

• If you are looking for quicker practices, try these two exercises.

• Start each day with a purpose or a specific attitude to center on. Each morning when you rise, before checking emails or social media, sit on your bed or chair with a relaxed posture. Take three deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. Then, ask yourself “What is my purpose for today?” You may choose to focus on self-care, gratitude, or acceptance. To determine this intention, consider the following questions: How might I have the best impact today? What do I need to take better care of myself? How might I feel more connected and fulfilled today? After setting this goal, check in with yourself throughout the day and make any changes as needed. You can also set specific goals for certain days, such as Monday you are focusing on compassion, Tuesday is celebration, and so on.

• Be present with what you are eating and it doesn’t matter what time of the day. Breathe before eating and then zero in on your food. Reflect on what it looks like, smells, and feels like. Then, taste it and enjoy. Slow down your eating to allow more time for digestion. If you don’t like your food, don’t eat it. After three mindful bites, if you aren’t feeling it, move onto another food.

• Next, notice how your body feels with a body scan meditation. Lie on your back with your extremities extended and at your sides, palms up for your arms. Draw your attention to what your body, head to toe, is doing. What are your arms doing? What about your legs? Lastly, focus on your senses and emotions. You may need to open your eyes for this one. Take deep breaths and let go of anything negative you may feel or notice in your surroundings. As you go through this exercise, pay attention to only one thing at a time. For example, don’t focus on sights and sounds at the same time.

For more kid-specific practices, options include muscle relaxation and positive affirmations. For muscle relaxation, start in a standing position, staring at your feet. Beginning with your feet, squeeze all of your muscles for five seconds and then slowly release them.

Continue moving up through your legs and the rest of your body.

• Another version of these meditations is by completing the walking meditation exercise. Whether it is indoors or outdoors, try to find a quiet place to slowly walk. Focus on your walking, your surroundings, and your movements.

Practicing mindfulness increases a person’s ability to enjoy the pleasures of life, the happy moments, and to be fully engaged in the present. Through these activities, you are focusing on what matters the most and finding calm in a crazy world.

88 | ForsythWoman.com

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A First Look at the Women on the Move Leadership Conference

BY TARYN JEREZ

“Forsyth Woman is thrilled to be hosting this conference! We feel it perfectly aligns with our mission of celebrating women,” said Brooke Eagle, Publisher of Forsyth Woman magazine. “We knew we wanted to name the conference after our most popular and renowned column.

‘Women on the Move’ has highlighted the incredible accomplishments of women in our community since Forsyth Woman’s inception 16 years ago! We feel that this conference is bringing our column to life and can’t wait to see it in action!”

Mark your calendar and get excited because Forsyth Woman Magazines’ “Women on the Move” initiative comes to life through its first-ever leadership conference on Monday, March 28th, 2022! Attendees can expect to take part in an inspiring and empowering event at the gorgeous Winmock at Kinderton in Bermuda Run surrounded by a community of women ready to learn and grow both personally and professionally.

EMPOWERING OUR COMMUNITY OF WOMEN Forsyth Woman has brought together an incredible group of local leading ladies from those in business, to owners and entrepreneurs, for a day full of impactful presentations, networking, shopping, food & drinks, and much more.

A CONFERENCE EXPERIENCE DESIGNED WITH YOU IN MIND This event has been created for women of all ages and all walks of life. Attendees do not need to be a business owner or in any specific niche for this event to make an impact.

Brooke shared that, “Each and every one of our speakers were strategically and thoughtfully chosen to ensure every woman gets so much out of this experience. We want you to come as you are and know you are exactly where you need to be!”

The Women on the Move Leadership Conference is going to kick your week off right when you arrive on Monday morning to a room filled with women as hungry for a purpose and passion filled life as you are. This isn’t just a sit in your seat and take notes kind of conference - there will be opportunities for networking and community building with an amazing group of like-minded women. In between standout speaker presentations, local vendors will be joining throughout the day for photo ops, an afternoon cocktail hour featuring Thirsty Buffalo and of course - in true Forsyth Magazines fashion - opportunities to shop and support local retail businesses!

Lunch will be catered by Providence Restaurant & Catering with a plethora of snacks and beverages available to give you energy throughout the day. Attendees can look forward to receiving swag bags filled with products and special discounts from all sorts of local businesses, as well as the chance to win one of several door prizes announced throughout the day.

“What is Waiting Costing You? How to Embrace Imperfection”

“Supporting Local is My Love Language”

“LEADing the Next Generation of Women Leaders”

Taryn Jerez, One Crafty Miss

Brooke Eagle, Publisher Forsyth Woman

Joy Nelson Thomas, Founder LEAD Girls of NC Inc.

@onecraftymissblog

@brooke__eagle

@leadgirlsofnc

Founder of One Crafty Miss, Taryn is a Creative Business Coach and Industry Speaker with a heart centered on teaching and serving creative women who have a vision for their business and their life.

Publisher of Forsyth Woman magazine and the host of the Forsyth Magazines Podcast, Brooke has a passion for helping small businesses and loves watching the triad community grow!

Founder/Executive Director of LEAD Girls of NC, an organization that utilizes an evidenced based approach and on a mission to change a girl, a community and eventually the world!

I N T R O D U C I N G “The Power of the Photo | How Brand Photography Can Grow Your Business”

Jodie Brim, Owner, Jodie Brim Creative @jodiebrim

O U R

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“Feel Good Naked. Manage Your Mindset. Build Body Confidence.”

Jordan Gomez, Body Positive Life Coach, Speaker & Podcaster @jgofitlife

L E A D E R S

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Jen Brown, The Engaging Educator @jenoleniczakbrown

A visionary leading the world of brand photography up and down the East Coast for over a decade. Jodie continually pushes the industry, adding services and skills to put her clients ahead of the pack.

“J.Go” is a Body Positive Life Coach who helps women create healthy habits and feel confident in their skin! She believes in self-love and body positivity as the ideal way for women to create long-term lifestyle changes!

Jen Brown ran The Engaging Educator, a nationwide communication consulting firm, for over a decade before moving into progressive politics. Her book, “Think On Your Feet: Tips and Tricks to Improve Your Impromptu Communication Skills on the Job” (McGraw Hill, 2019) has been called “one of the best presentation books of all time” by Book Authority.

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Erika Taylor, Taylor Your Closet

Ja’Net Adams, Debt Sucks University

Brittany McGee, Humble Bee Shoppe

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Charlotte, NC based founder of “Taylor Your Closet,” Erika styles women from all walks of life with confidence.

International Speaker and Author, Ja’Net travels the world sharing with audiences how she paid off $50,000 of debt in two years!

Brittany McGee is a self-taught Pastry Chef who owns a boutique bakery in downtown WinstonSalem, NC, specializing in custom confections.

WE CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU THERE

Whether you come with a group or decide to venture out alone, there is a room of women ready to welcome you. The Women on the Move Leadership Conference is the experience you’ve been waiting for and it won’t be the same without you! Forysth Woman has every expectation that tickets will sell out before the event date, therefore it’s highly encouraged to register and get your ticket in advance. To keep up with all the latest conference announcements and behind-the-scenes looks, be sure to follow @ForsythMags on Facebook and Instagram pages as the event gets closer!

If you are interested in purchasing a table, sponsoring the conference or have any questions about the event, please email brooke@forsythmags.com

Purchase your tickets at tinyurl.com/WOMConference

Personalized Collections: The Common Items We Acquire

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

Each person has their own preference of objects and knick-knacks that they like to collect. Some may choose to go more with sport-related memorabilia, while others prefer more family pieces. Throughout the years, you may notice that you have built a collection of the same or similar objects. As for me, it was postcards and rocks.

• Toys - Growing up, I had numerous Beanie Babies. Some may say it was a collection, I didn’t really see it that way. Beanie Babies are just one of the many toys that people have gathered in numbers. Barbie Dolls, Polly Pockets, and figurines are other popular items. Some treasure hunters only seek the retro or rare toys or certain brands.

According to dictionary.com, the official definition for a “collection” is “a group of objects or an amount of material accumulated in one location especially for some purpose.”

Collections are unique, personalized, and can hold special meanings for the owner.

Collecting can quickly become a hobby with people being on a treasure hunt for new items to add to their stash. In addition, depending on the age and value of the objects, some collections can be worth a lot of money.

UNIQUE COLLECTABLES

There are a variety of collectibles in the world.

Some may be crazy or rare, while some may be more common. Let’s take a look at some of the most collected items, popular and also on the unique side. Do you collect some of these items?

MOST POPULAR ITEMS • Stamps - Due to their long history and unique variety, stamps have been very popular to collect throughout the generations. Every country in the world has their own version of postage stamps, making some designs rarer and more valuable.

• Coins - Similar to stamps, coin collections can come from all over the world with their own histories and stories. However, it is important to know the basics of coin collection when you get started. These basics include how they are made, the different patterns, and the best way to store the coins.

• Comic Books - Young or old versions, comic books are a favorite among many. You may focus on just one story or character, multiple stories, or invest in finding special copies.

Keep in mind, though, these books need to be kept in perfect condition in order to be preserved and passed down through the years.

• Trading Cards - Let me tell you, trading cards are still as beloved today as they have been in the past. My middle school students were in fact talking about their collections and trading them just a few weeks ago.

Collections of these items can include Magic cards, Pokemon, and Yu-Gi-Oh!

• Royal memorabilia - A few people are true British royal family fans and have collected items that commemorate historical events, such as royal weddings, births, and deaths.

Whether it is Princess Diana or William and Kate, some memorabilia may be worth something.

• Brainteasers - These games and puzzles require people to think critically and logically. Collections of these types could include paper versions of brainteasers, as well as, Rubik’s Cubes, wooden puzzles, Picasso Tiles, and metal wire puzzles.

• Gnomes - Small garden creatures of all shapes, sizes, and seasons, more commonly known as gnomes, have been around for many decades. These items do have special meanings as gnomes are actually symbols of good luck and are thought to provide protection. For some people, building a collection of gnomes comes from just wanting something cute to look at.

• Vacuum Cleaners - While vacuuming may not be some people’s favorite thing to do, vacuum cleaners have become a collector’s item. New and old versions of the machines, as well as rare types, are available. Some go for the Hoover types, while others stay with Dysons.

• Feathers - Bird lovers are more tuned into this type of collection. Feathers of different colors, textures, sizes, and from a variety of animals throughout the world can be used as great learning tools. However, of course, you need to proceed with caution when it comes to acquiring feathers from live birds.

There are hundreds of different collections throughout the world. Some are small, some are big, some are expensive, and others are completely free. Whatever you collect, be sure to find the items that are special and fun for you. Collections are wonderful hobbies that can be passed through generations. The next time you start gathering similar items, think to yourself, “Will this become my next collection?”

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The Real Deal with Candice Deal Reduce Your Toxic Load and Spend Less! BY CANDICE DEAL

Welcome to “The Real Deal with Candice Deal” column. When she’s not working as a project manager, you can usually find this avid horse rider sitting in the saddle. Between the office, home and barn, Candice does her due diligence to find the best, easiest, most economical options for things we do all the time – without the chemicals and toxins we don’t need. Be on the lookout for this column in 2022. Welcome, Candice!

Who wants to spend less money? And keep chemicals out of your body? I do, and I bet you do, too. Here are some easy ways to reduce your toxic chemical exposure and save a little cash along the way!

BRUSH BETTER IN THE BATHROOM

When you think of your toothpaste, what is the golden rule of brushing your teeth? Brush for two minutes? Use up and down strokes? Or is it the alarming message on every tube? MAY BE HARMFUL IF SWALLOWED! The reason you should not swallow your toothpaste is because it contains harmful chemicals.

So why would you want to use it in a sensitive place like your mouth?

Your mouth has its own microbiome, much like the gut. Mouthwash and toothpaste are full of alcohols, surfactants and fluoride that dismantle the microbiome. We want to keep the Ph level of our mouths in an alkaline state.

If our saliva is too acidic it can dissolve the enamel of the teeth and host the bad bacteria that can cause cavities.

CLEAN UP YOUR ACT IN THE LAUNDRY ROOM

We all want our clothes to smell and be clean! But there is a difference between being clean and smelling like a rain garden for two weeks.

Walk the laundry aisle of the grocery store and you will find an array of alluring scents of laundry detergent, laundry softener, dryer sheets and scent boosting beads!

But what is really in that bottle of detergent? Mostly water, harsh chemicals and surfactants and fragrance. Fragrance is not an ingredient, but it’s a host of ingredients that make up that rain garden smell.

Typically, these are going to be full of chemicals that aren’t nice to your skin, the air you breathe or your endocrine system. Your clothes are on your skin most hours of the day, so what’s in your clothes is touching your largest organ all day long! And detergent can get pricey when you realize that you are paying for a lot of water and harmful chemicals.

You can easily clean up your detergent with a home-made recipe that’s a cinch to make at a fraction of the cost and uses much gentler ingredients – most of which you probably have in your kitchen right now. This simple recipe gets your clothes clean, saves money and reduces the toxic chemicals next to your skin all day!

Materials: 1-gallon size glass jug (plastic will work, too) 1 cup baking soda 1/3 cup sea salt 2 1/2 cups hot water 1 1/4 cup castile soap

Oils like coconut, MCT and essential oils are fantastic for your mouth – they are botanical biotic boosters. Baking soda is very alkalizing and its similar to saliva biochemically. Toss your tube and replace it with an easy to make at home toothpaste and a rinse that will leave your mouth clean and Ph balanced.

Ingredients for Toothpaste: 2 cup glass dish with lid (or several small) 1 cup organic coconut oil (solid) ½ cup baking soda 20 drops of peppermint oil (or cinnamon oil) 10 drops of frankincense oil Directions: In a double boiler, heat the coconut oil until it’s liquified.

Add in your baking soda and stir until well mixed. Remove from the boiler.

Stir in your essential oils. Transfer to a glass dish with a lid. Let the mixture cool to room temperature or stick in the refrigerator to decrease cooling time. Your liquid will become a soft paste. Use a spatula or spoon to transfer to your brush or rub the brush directly on the surface. When you’ve brushed for two minutes, spit your paste into the trash vs. the sink to keep your drains clean.

Ingredients for Rinse: 20 oz container with lid 16 oz. purified water 1 oz. sea salt 2 drops of peppermint oil 2 drops of frankincense oil Directions: Stir until salt has dissolved; use your rinse before and after brushing. Consider adding tongue scraping to your regimen to increase your cleanliness – you can use the edge of a kitchen spoon!

Ingredients for Whitening: 1/2 TBsp 3% hydrogen peroxide ½ TBsp purified water Directions: Mix in a cup and swish for 2 minutes. Follow with your rinse to alkalize your mouth. Hydrogen Peroxide is acidic. Use this solution two times a month to keep your teeth white and keep stains at bay.

Directions: Combine baking soda and sea salt in your gallon jug. Add hot water. Shake/stir until salt and baking soda have dissolved. Let the mixture settle (until it doesn’t sound fizzy) and cool. Add the castile soap (I like Dr. Bronner’s, the ingredients are non-toxic) and then top with cool water.

Use 1 cup for regular loads, use a little more for heavily soiled loads or large loads, use a little less for small loads! Give your jug a little shake before dispensing as the ingredients may settle.

Want to take it one step farther? Ditch your fabric softener and use white vinegar – add some drops of your favorite essential oil (they won’t stain like olive oil) directly to the vinegar bottle and shake or pour into the measuring cup and add 3-5 drops of oil. Add the vinegar to your bleach dispenser to soften your clothes; no need for a dryer sheet.

94 | ForsythWoman.com

That’s it – less toxins in and on your body, and more money in your pocket! Easy-peasy!

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How Sweet It Is

BY GENEVIEVE CONDON

Winter had settled in on the island, the cool breeze of the ocean replaced with a bitter wind that took your breath away when you stepped outside. Ty insisted that we go snowshoeing. Dylan refused and sat by the fire. I wish I stayed home with him. I couldn’t feel my toes or my fingers.

“Ty, how much longer? I’m turning into an icicle.” I whined.

Ty stopped and walked towards me, the shoes awkward as he tried to take bigger steps. I giggled at the sight of him, the big goggles he wore to protect his eyes and the gloves making him look more like a cartoon character than anything else.

96 | ForsythWoman.com

“Let me see.” Placing the goggles on top of his head and removing his gloves, he held out his hand and I placed my frozen hands in his. Slowly he took off my gloves, before rubbing them together and breathing on them. The friction of his hands, coupled with this breath warmed me instantly. Ty always could.

With just a look. Just a touch. He was my sun when the sky was gloomy. Ty was my smile when all I wanted to do was frown.

He was my everything.

I took in a sharp breath, my 18-year-old mind trying to phantom what he was saying. I knew that Ty and I were treading on relationship territory after the few days we had but I never thought he loved me. Not like that. His words warmed my frozen toes, my nose that I knew was red and made me look like an odd version of a snow man, but he didn’t care. Ty Rue loved me. I closed my eyes, the snowflakes taking up residence on the tips of my eyelashes. Then I felt it, Ty’s lips gently touched mine.

“Lydia, what if I told you that I love you?”

The snow was falling, the large flakes peppering Ty’s face with white. In this light, the sun hitting the ground, the snow all around us, his eyes were so blue he stole my breath.

Opening my eyes, Ty gazed at me, his dark hair turned white. With a giggle, I shook off his hair.

“I love you too.” I smiled as he continued to rub my hands.

“No. Love you. Like I want to kiss you love you.”

“I’d say I love you too Ty Rue. Always have. Always will.” With a smile, Ty took my hand in his. The rest of the way back home, my body wasn’t frozen, it was warm. As warm as a summer day on the beach with the sun radiating over my body. Ty Rue was my warmth. He was perfection and he loved me.

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January 2022 | 97

The Social Media Detox Challenge

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

Within recent years, social media has taken a forefront in sending and receiving information and news to people throughout the world. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and multiple other sites are based on instant communication between the user, their friends, and websites. During a five minute check, a person can find out what ten of their friends are currently doing, what is happening in China, and any changes in today’s weather. Using social media does have both positive and negative benefits. One good impact is the ability to connect with people who live miles away, as well as receive news and information instantly. However, social media has also been linked to depression, anxiety, unrealistic expectations, and creating the fear of being left out and not knowing what is going on in the world around you.

Did you know that according to recent studies, an average person spends about 145 minutes (almost 2 ½ hours) on social media per day? Looking at my own habits, I spend way too much time on social media. Scrolling through the latest news to see what everyone is doing and what is going on in the world. I know I am probably not alone in this confession.

As people are making their New Year’s resolutions, one may be common on many people’s lists - spending less time on social media. Over the last few months, I have tried to be on social media or my phone less. There are days I come home in the afternoon and don’t touch my phone for several hours until I go to bed. These opportunities of putting my phone away and unplugging for a little bit are freeing and relaxing. You don’t feel as if you are obligated to check the various sites or your device. This habit can take a little while to get used to, but is very much worth it. In addition, the small practice of taking time away from social media can be expanded into a whole day, week, or month. Let me introduce to you the Social Media Detox Challenge.

During this challenge, the goal is simple - spend less time on social media. But how? There are many ways to break your habit, including these:

98 | ForsythWoman.com

First, it is important to be aware of just how much time you spend on social media. There are apps available to track your usage per social media site or usage in general. Your phone’s settings may also have a screen time tracker. For my iPhone, I can see my screen time on a daily and weekly basis. This feature breaks down the time I spend on various apps and their overall categories, such as social, entertainment, etc. After seeing your screen time, identify which apps are used the most and why you are using them. Is it for entertainment? Is it for organization or something else? Once you have done this research, create a time limit goal. Maybe you would like to cut down the time to only two hours per week.

Cell phone settings should include time limit features that will turn off apps once the usage time is up. Set a timeframe for when you’ll be on social media during the day that works best with your schedule, such as 10 am to 7 pm. Once the deadline comes, social media is no longer available until the next day. Don’t forget about your notifications, mute or unfollow buttons on the social media sites themselves to adjust what you see and may be attracted to or that takes up your attention. I don’t have any notifications turned on for any of the social media sites I use and this trick has helped me resist the urge to jump on my phone whenever a notification appears.

Another tip is to change up the location of where you place your phone and the location of your apps on the phone itself. We often find ourselves looking at the sites without even realizing it. Switch things up and place your most used sites on the last page of your phone. You could also physically move your device to a room on the opposite end of the house.

The Social Media Detox Challenge can be hard to adjust to at first, but once you get fully into it, you will be surprised at just how much extra time you have. Also, you will find yourself quickly filling up those moments with activities that leave you feeling more satisfied and happier than just scrolling through social media.

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January 2022 | 99

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

This column is dedicated to uplifting incredible women that might not be featured in the local news about their accomplishments.

These are abridged versions of these incredible women; please find them and ask them more!

ASIA PEPPER

What makes you YOU? Since I was young, my parents always said I had a heart for people. I was born premature, so I think it is important to fight for those who don’t have a voice or to amplify those who aren’t being heard.

I’m also a nerd. I can tell you everything you never wanted to know about DC Comics and D&D.

What are you most proud of?

I’m proud of all of the amazing people who I call friends and family, but I am most proud of my mom, Lisa, and my mother-in-law, Alane. To say they are amazing is an understatement. They both are so resilient, brave, and the funniest people I know. They have always supported me and they always challenge me to grow. When I decided to go back to school, they were my biggest cheerleaders. I am so blessed to have such great women in my life.

What keeps you going when things are tough?

To quote James Baldwin, “Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” I keep going because I have to; I think about all of the strong and astonishing women that paved the way for me to be where I am now and I can’t let them down. I want to leave this community and world better than I found it. Also coffee and tea definitely helps.

What keeps you up at night?

Injustice. Knowing that we have so much wealth and resources in this community but the people who need it cannot access it. I grew up in Winston-Salem and I know this community can be better to the people who live here.

That, and every awkward thing I’ve ever said since high school.

100 | ForsythWoman.com

SHANATA MCMILLIAN SHEPARD What makes you YOU?

My ability to understand others and genuinely show empathy is what makes me, me. Being an empath can be a gift and a curse. On the other hand, it is a trait that I feel every human needs a piece of. Being empathetic to others gives me the opportunity to listen first and judge last. It allows me space to put myself in someone else’s shoes and understand where they are coming from, rather than whether I agree or disagree.

As an empath it helps guide my daily interactions with others and the clients I serve.

What are you most proud of?

I am most proud of my sons Chancelor (14) and Ar’Jai (6). Both my sons are rainbow babies so that in itself makes me proud. Chancelor is an AG Freshman JV football player and Ar’Jai is a 1st grade scholar at a homeschool co-op. I keep them prayed up and am hopeful that the values and morals their father and I are instilling in them will continue for generations to come.

What keeps you going when things are tough?

God is and forever will be my go-to when things are tough. There have been times I have wanted to give up…but God! My family also helps. I want to set an example for my children that though things get tough, they often get better but you will never know if you quit.

What keeps you up at night?

When COVID first hit, I was totally engulfed in it and would spend many nights worrying. I no longer stay awake because of that thanks to the vaccine which has helped many combat the virus. I’m content in my life right now and the people that are in it. I live life with a clean heart and the motto of doing unto others as I would have them do unto me and because of that I sleep well every night.

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January 2022 | 101

Permission Granted: Conquering The Tyranny Of Shoulds

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

Can is about ability Could is about choice Should is about obligation

A WELL-WORN PATH

Of course, we learned all of this in grammar school. But the significance of these everyday words is enormous: a can quickly morphs into a could, and often from there makes a small leap over to a should. But hello?

Just because you can doesn’t mean you should!

I’ll tell you straight out, whenever I hear a should escape my lips, I almost always go for a rephrasing: “What I meant was that you might want to think about…”

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to come off like a know it all.”

“I hate it when people “should” on me, so I don’t want to be “shoulding on you.”

Can is cool because it empowers us with agency.

Could is super cool because it’s about possibility that we either choose or decline.

But should is dangerous because it can mess with us if we are not cautious.

Case in point: In ways large and small, we “should” ourselves to exhaustion: I should see grandma more often I should sign up for that online course I should lose 10 pounds…make that 20 I should exercise for God’s sake!

I should just say no to chocolate I should, should should.

Substitute a few words here and there and you are looking at my list, and probably yours.

“Shoulding” is a habit we pick up early by way of example. Parents, teachers, strangers, and even friends model it often and, just as often, without thinking.

And that is equally true: when someone wields a should in my direction, I duck.

Then I remind myself that: They probably mean well They don’t know any other way to be helpful They may think they know more about me than they really do

LETTING GO IS HARD TO DO But the bigger issue with our shoulds is how they keep us weighed down and sometimes downright stuck. It’s hard to believe, but some of my shoulds have their origins in my 10-year-old self. To say that they have gathered a lot of dust would be a significant understatement. And here’s the thing: it’s ON ME to dust them off, take another look and then decide if they get the heave-ho.

But letting go isn’t so easy. It means releasing ourselves from an idea or an obligation we’ve placed on ourselves or one we’ve accepted from someone, perhaps a parent, or from our culture. That’s why letting go is loaded. It means releasing ourselves from guilt, a sense of failure, or maybe even a sense of who we are or think we should be.

Let me be clear: I am working on my self-inflicted shoulds, sifting the worthy from those that need a refresh, and yes, tossing the obsolete. The process is painful but oh-so liberating.

GRANT THYSELF PERMISSION Here are a few tips for your “shoulding” refresh: • Remind yourself that you are always changing – and that’s a good thing. You are both constant and fluid.

• Consider what you want and what you value right now – prioritize and then decide which of your shoulds stay, go, or need a revision. Shoulds work for you when they support your vision and values and become your chosen “I will’s.”

• Ask yourself: “How does this matter in the scheme of things? Keep your eye on the big picture and stay flexible.

Crushing new goals for a great new year.

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BY TARYN JEREZ OF ONECRAFTYMISS.COM

Goal Setting: This Year, Your Brand Needs You to Think Small This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

You may be wondering if you just read that title right. Shouldn’t you be thinking big when it comes to your goals for the year as a brand? Surely 2022 is the year to go bigger and badder and come out even stronger on the other side, so why would I tell you to think small?

The truth is, it’s the little things that count even in your business.

Too often we let what we want to achieve get overshadowed by large undertakings that leave our goals like dust in the wind by the end of the year. This year when you’re looking at your goals and envisioning the growth you want to see for your business I want you to put away the idea that you have to have grandiose goals to get there.

Instead, this is your time to reign it in and think smaller, more specifically and to prioritize the little things that are going to take you further than ever before.

What Worked Well Last Year?

Start by taking inventory of the last twelve months and recall the things your business did well. Where did you find the most opportunity and sales? What marketing efforts paid off? What can you remember feeling really positive about?

This is an important first step when you’re thinking about what you want to work towards because it doesn’t always have to be reinvention that you’re after each new year. Recollection is just as powerful as it gets you thinking about the little things that you not only want to repeat, but capitalize on again.

Where Can You Improve This Year?

Now comes the harder part: being your own critic. Trust your gut and without being too hard on yourself look back at where you saw room for improvement.

Circle back to the moments you felt the

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largest pain points as a business. Were those moments caused due to organization issues, time management, cash flow problems or a lack of boundary setting? All of these things should be part of the small ways you look for improvement in the new year and how to focus your energy toward establishing workflows or processes to reach those bigger goals.

Who is Helping Keep You Encouraged & Accountable?

Community will always be your greatest resource as a business, but it won’t come to you on its own. Think about where you had the most support last year, or even the least. What would you change? The goals you are going to be working toward need to have support outside of just you. Maybe you need to hire a business coach or join a membership in 2022, or just make time to meet more regularly with a fellow business owner friend for coffee? Prioritizing something as small as relationships in your business can make all the difference.

How Are Your Daily Goals Setting You Up for Success?

It’s easy to dream big and to think about the future, but it’s much harder to set small goals and create daily processes that will actually get you there. You want to create a daily plan that supports how you and your team work best, while keeping focused on the small goals that sometimes get pushed under the rug. When are you at your most productive, creative or restless? How do you want to feel in your business? What kind of schedule will help maintain those feelings? Think about how the little things add up when you don’t consider them holistically.

Hustle & Heart Challenge

This month take an intentional step back and break your big goals for the new year into small steps that will support you along the way. Remind yourself that it’s the little things you do consistently that will lead to the biggest changes and growth in your business!

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WOMEN ON THE MOVE CORIE DOSS

Corie Doss is the owner of Wine Nox and recently celebrated her one-year anniversary as a business owner. She earned her bachelor’s degree from the University of North Carolina Charlotte where she double majored in sociology and criminal justice. “I have a creative soul and enjoy anything with art and design,” said Corie. “My love for creativity expands from creating meaningful gifts to now creating meaningful experiences through curated decorations for celebrations at my business for others.” She is very thankful for her husband’s belief in her abilities and encouragement to dream big, as well as her parents for supporting her and her dreams.

SHATORIA WHITESIDE

Shatoria Whiteside, a native of Winston-Salem, is the owner of a literacy firm, The Learning Advantage, LLC, and the executive director of the non-profit Read, Empower and Distinguish (READ).

She is a proud graduate of North Carolina A&T State University and holds a master’s degree in education. She is an educator who has a heart for literacy and understands the vehicle that literacy is for accessing different things in life. She taught her now six-year-old son to read at the age of two. In those moments, she realized the power in parents having the knowledge and capacity to educate their own children, so she launched her business and non-profit with her passion and heart leading her to empower students and families through education and literacy. In her free time, Shatoria is traveling the world with her husband and kids. She currently teaches children in Ghana and hopes to visit in 2022.

MISHON SHORE

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Mishon Shore is the owner and a hair stylist at Salon Mishon. She has a cosmetology license from Leon’s Beauty School and is a certified hair colorist and hair extension artist. She has owned her own salon suite for eight years and has been doing hair for 16 years. She is also a certified lash lift and tint artist.

“I have wanted to do hair since I was a little girl,” said Mishon. “Making people feel better about themselves is so rewarding in this profession. I have built great friendships and connections over my 16 years behind the chair. I value my time with my clients, and I strive to make them feel beautiful and listened to. I love continuing education and stay up to date on all the newest trends and techniques.

I always want to deliver the best when you’re sitting in my chair.” In her spare time, Mishon loves to spend time with her family which includes two beautiful children, Charleston, age 5, and Memphis who is eight weeks old.

SHERIDAN C. WATKINS

Sheridan C. Watkins is the founder of Shairpins, an interchangeable pin that can be worn as a hair clip, necklace, brooch, or pair of earrings. She has a bachelor’s degree in journalism from WinstonSalem State University. “I began realizing a calling in my life to create happiness and spread it to others,” said Sheridan. “Once I left school and tried to find secure jobs in my field with no real success, I decided I would create the life I wanted. My ‘job’ is running my business along with other independent positions that fulfill my passion for writing and helping my community. No day looks the same, and I enjoy the people I interact with on a daily basis. It helps me to better understand the purpose of human life and the role I play to make the world better for us to live in.” Sheridan was a designer in WinstonSalem Fashion Week, and now, Shairpins is carried in five stores around Winston-Salem. In her spare time, Sheridan loves to spend time in nature, walking and soaking in the weather which brings her peace and energy. “I also love to craft and write, and I’m so grateful that I get to do this full-time as I build my business,” said Sheridan.

She also enjoys swimming and taking care of her dog and plants.

KATELYN POPLIN

Katelyn Poplin is the owner of KHP Photography. She attended Appalachian State University and loves the mountains as much as anyone! She is originally from a very small, rural town in the Triad, so this area is home.

She started photography in 2018 which is also when she married her high school sweetheart, Keenan. “I am not only a photographer, but a nurse, as well,” said Katelyn. “I love this community and actually grew up in the NC Triad. My passion for connecting with others and getting to know their stories actually inspired my business. I love that photos are a visual representation of memories. I want people to be able to look at a photo and go right back to that moment in time – how it felt. That’s why it’s important to me!” In her free time, she enjoys spending time outdoors doing pretty much anything as well as being with her family, friends and her golden retriever, Maggie. She also loves to cook and working on the décor and design of her own home.

BRITTANY DUNCAN

Brittany Duncan is a Realtor and broker for Re/Max Preferred Properties who sold 60+ homes this year! She was born and raised in the Triad and currently resides with her husband and two daughters in Kernersville. “I have a deep connection with my community which has helped guide me to build my career with passion to serve people and their families,” said Brittany. “I look at the relationships with my clients as a partnership. To fully understand the unique needs of each valued client by taking the time to ask questions and dig deep into what their individual goals are. Having a strong background in building personal relationships with clients, my enthusiastic personality, determination, and interpersonal skills give me the drive to help my clients conquer their goals. My keen eye for interior design and style is crucial for the homebuying process, when envisioning the future layout of homes.

I always strive to make my clients feel comfortable and informed.

When I am not working in real estate, you can find me spending time with my two little girls, in my closet planning out my outfits for the week, skiing down a mountain or decorating my house.”

If you are interested in submitting yourself or someone you know for a future Women on the Move feature, visit our online application link! TinyURL.com/ForsythWomanWOM

CELEBRATIONS

Happy 40th Anniversary to Marianne & Charlie Schuler

Welcome to the world,

Palmer Lilly Weatherman!

We love you so much!

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Caitlin + Ryan Fanning 10.9.21 Ivy and Dust Photography

Rae + Jason Fields

Emily + Trevor Flynn

10.2.21 Ivy and Dust Photography

10.16.21 Ivy and Dust Photography January 2022 | 109

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January 2022 | 111

NOW - JANUARY 31 “SURFACES & SOUNDINGS” EXHIBITION BY BOB KING Milton Rhodes Center for the Arts in W-S. Bob King’s Surfaces and Soundings is an exhibition that combines examples from two current bodies of work – Phenoumena (paintings) and Earthwork (sculpture). The artist intends that the works on exhibit hover between abstraction and representation, ideation and perception, and he invites viewers to enter into dialogue with the works, gather their own perceptions, and form their own associations, interpretations, and narratives.

King currently resides in WinstonSalem and completed his PhD in cultural studies/education at UNC-Greensboro. The heart of his artistic process is the dialogue between materials and memories inspired by the human form and solitude in nature.

DECEMBER 31 NOON YEAR’S EVE 12pm, South Fork Community Center, 4403 Country Club Road. Join us for a New Year’s Celebration at noon! We will have a hot chocolate toast, crafts and a balloon drop at noon.

Registration is required.

Cost: $10 per child; register at WePLAYevents@cityofws.org

JANUARY 1 FIRST DAY HIKE 11am & 1pm, Minglewood Farm and Nature Preserve, 238 Minglewood Road in Westfield. Start your New Year off right by spending time in the great outdoors! Explore the preserve on your own and enjoy a self-guided farm tour. Dress warm, and have a great time! Find the event on Eventbrite!

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JANUARY 5

JANUARY 13 & 25

GIRLS’ NIGHT OUT

HOMESCHOOL JUMP

5pm-until…, Davie Tavern, Tanglewood Crossing Shopping Center, 5279 U.S. Highway 158 in Advance. Grab a friend, a neighbor, your sister, your mother, a co-worker and have a much-needed Girls’ Night Out! Enjoy half price spinach and artichoke dip as well as a half price “Sunrise Over Davie” signature cocktail. As always, each attendee will receive four tickets for our fabulous prize board drawings!

1-3pm, Rockin’ Jump Trampoline Park, 7840 North Point Boulevard in W-S. Rockin’ Jump Trampoline Park offers a Homeschool Jump twice a month on the second Thursday and fourth Tuesday at our Winston-Salem location and once a month on the second Thursday of every month from 1:00pm – 3:00pm at our Greensboro location. Cost: $10/ person. Visit rockinjump.com/winston-salem/ homeschool.

JANUARY 6

JANUARY 14-16

INTRO TO YOGA – YOGA FOR BEGINNERS

BLUSH BY FRANCESCA AVILA – BRIDAL TRUNK SHOW

6pm, Sunrise Yoga Studio, 6311-A Stadium Drive in Clemmons. Have you or someone you know been wanting to try yoga but are reluctant because you’ve never done it?

Sunrise Yoga Studio in Clemmons have a great opportunity for beginners starting Jan. 6th. Learn and practice in a small group of beginners just like you! Sign up soon as space is extremely limited in order to give individual attention to each student. In-Studio and Virtual options available. To learn more or sign up, visit sunriseyoga.net/yoga-workshops/.

Nitsa’s Apparel, 107 South Stratford Road in W-S. Nitsa’s offers the finest selection of couture bridal gowns, bridesmaid dresses, veils, accessories, social occasion and cocktail dresses, sportswear and cosmetics. As the Carolinas’ Couture Bridal Salon, Nitsa’s provides its signature personal service and exceptional in-house alterations.

Fabulous since 1964! nitsas.com

JANUARY 8 MAE’S BEAUTY BAR GRAND OPENING 121 Pineview Drive in Kernersville. Mae’s Beauty Bar Grand Opening 9am-5pm! There will be lots of vendors, food, prizes and discounts!

JANUARY 12 KIDS’ MORNING OUT 10am-12pm, Kaleideum North, 400 West Hanes Mill Road in W-S. Come explore what’s new at Kaleideum North! Check out the Sun, Earth, Universe Exhibition to find out how the earth is changing and what it’s like on other planets. In addition, IceVenture is back!

Purchase a Kaleideum membership at KMO, and receive 10% off. Discounted admission to KMO is $5 per person; Kaleideum members attend for free. Each adult also receives four tickets for the fabulous prize board drawings.

JANUARY 15 UNC SCHOOL OF THE ARTS: EMBRACING THE ‘20S 7:30-9:30pm, Watson Hall, UNC School of the Arts in W-S. Faculty artists Kevin Lawrence, violin, and Dmitri Shteinberg, piano, present music from the ’20s — the 1720s, the 1820s, the 1920s and our very own 2020s. The program includes works

by J.S. Bach, Franz Schubert and Ernest Bloch, plus the premiere of a work by a UNCSA student composer, written in 2021. In-person event. Masks required for all performances.

JANUARY 18 UNC SCHOOL OF THE ARTS: LATIN AMERICAN SOUNDSCAPES 7:30-9:30pm, Watson Hall, UNC School of the Arts in W-S. The Americas Ensemble leads a musical tour across Latin America. Flutist Maria Fernanda Castillo, oboist Jaren Atherholt, bassoonist Benjamin Atherholt and cuatro/ guitar player Régulo Stabilito will showcase Latin American music from the Baroque to the present, ranging from classical repertoire to traditional

music. The program features musical selections from Bolivia, Brazil, Argentina and Venezuela. In-person event. Masks required for all performances.

SUBMIT YOUR EVENTS ONLINE AT FORSYTHWOMAN.COM

JANUARY 19 WINTERY WOODCARVING MAKER EXPERIENCE 5-8pm, Mixxer Community Makerspace in W-S. Have you always wanted to try your hand at wood carving or whittling?

In this maker experience, you will get an introduction to wood carving.

Makers will learn to cut out shapes on the electric scroll saw or bandsaw, then use a carving knife to shape and carve the details! You will learn to make a snowman, heart or other wintery adornment! Take your shape home to be sanded, painted or wood burned.

These wintery items make nice holiday ornaments, magnets or gift tags!

IMPORTANT SAFETY NOTE: Be sure to wear and boots or close toed shoes.

We’ll provide the rest of the safety gear you’ll need. Please bring your own cut resistant gloves if you have them.

Mixxer’s cut resistant gloves are sized M and L; if other sizes are needed, please email workshops@wsmixxer.org.

JANUARY 20 DAN TYMINSKI BAND: CROSSROADS @ SECCA 6-10:30pm, SECCA, Southeastern Center for Contemporary Art in W-S. Dan has contributed guitar and/ or harmony to projects by Martina McBride, Reba McEntire, Brad Paisley, Dolly Parton, Willie Nelson, Kenny Chesney, LeAnn Rimes, Aaron Lewis and Rob Thomas, to name a few.

In addition to his highly successful solo career, Dan Tyminski has played guitar and mandolin for Alison Krauss and Union Station since 1994. His unmatched instrumental skills and burnished, soulful tenor voice have been key components of the band.

Doors at the McChesney Scott Dunn Auditorium at SECCA will open at 6pm, and the music will begin at 7pm. General admission tickets are $40. VIP tickets are $50. SECCA is grateful for the support of longtime Crossroads sponsors Foothills Brewing and 88.5 WFDD.

JANUARY 22

JANUARY 29

HOUSE PLANT BASICS WORKSHOP WITH PATIENTLY ROOTED

SMALL BUSINESS MEET & GREET

11am, 108 North State Street in Yadkinville. In this workshop, Kelli from Patiently Rooted will teach you all of the house plant basics! We will also be painting/ personalizing your own pot for your new plant. No experience needed! All materials will be provided during class. You will leave with your new plant inside your decorated pot and watering can. Light refreshments provided. We will cover essential plant care (watering and light techniques, when to repot and how to get rid of pests. Repotting a small plant, dirt and pot provided.

1-3pm, Bar Nola, 1151 Canal Drive, Suite 205 in W-S. Please save the date and plan to come “meet & greet”other small businesses in the area and beyond! We had a phenomenal time last year; we met so many wonderful, like-minded people. Please plan to join us! linktr.ee/RevivalJunkies

JANUARY 23 NC GIRL GANG GALENTINES GALA The Shiloh in Lowgap, NC. This is a ticketed event, where women-owned businesses come together for a night full of yummy food, networking and promotion!

Cost: $50/person.

JANUARY 25 HOMESCHOOL JUMP 1-3pm, Rockin’ Jump Trampoline Park, 4215 West Gate City Boulevard in Greensboro. Rockin’ Jump Trampoline Park offers a Homeschool Jump twice a month on the second Thursday and fourth Tuesday at our Winston-Salem location and once a month on the second Thursday of every month from 1:00pm – 3:00pm at our Greensboro location. Cost: $10/person.

Visit rockinjump.com/winston-salem/homeschool.

FUTURE: MARCH 28 WOMEN ON THE MOVE CONFERENCE Winmock at Kinderton in Bermuda Run. Mark your calendar and get excited because Forsyth Woman magazine’s “Women on the Move” initiative comes to life through its first-ever leadership conference.

Attendees can expect to take part in an inspiring and empowering event surrounded by a community of women ready to learn and grow both personally and professionally.

If you are interesting in purchasing a table, sponsoring the conference or have any questions about the event, please email brooke@ forsythmags.com. Purchase your tickets at tinyurl.com/ WOMConference.

*DISCLAIMER: EVENT DETAILS ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE. PLEASE CHECK EVENT WEBSITES & SOCIAL MEDIA PAGES FOR UPDATES AS THE DATES DRAW NEAR.* January 2022 | 113

Conversations with Your BFF The wise and great philosopher, Dr. Phil, says at least once a week, “You wouldn’t worry so much about what other people thought about you if you knew how little they did.” Most of us, especially in our teen years, early twenties, and well, many times along life’s path, fixate on what others think about us. Whether it’s a potential significant other, a friend, or a co-worker, we can get caught up in the impression we think we are giving to others, but should it really worry us what others think? I am so glad you asked!

JUST DON’T GO THERE! Worrying about what other people think about you can easily get your mind wandering to dark places where you pick apart everything that makes you who you are. Going down those negative self thought paths can trigger feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, and insecurity. I know it is easier said than done, but when you feel like you’re overly concerned about what others may think of you, put the brakes on your thoughts and stop. You have no idea what people think when you are in their presence, yet we usually go to the worst place and think, ‘I know they think I’m stupid,’ or ‘Why did she wear that?’’ or ‘Why did she get the promotion?’ There are a few things you can do to keep from focusing on what others think about you and more on what you think about yourself.

REALIZE THAT YOU ARE NOT A MIND READER Many times we put people in a box that they don’t deserve to be in. Because of some comments they may have made in the past, you think they wouldn’t be supportive of you if you shared a life change or feeling with them. But, you may be missing out on a friend who is going through the same stage of life that you are. I remember when I was going through my separation, I was sad and felt like a failure, so when I saw a friend from church in the grocery store, I literally ran up and down aisles to keep from seeing her and being asked any questions. Come to find out, she was going through a separation at the same time and her life wasn’t as perfect as it looked. We could’ve been a good support to each other had I not sped away with my cart.

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Should I Worry What People Think about Me?

BY REBECCA COOPER

NO ONE JUDGES YOU LIKE YOU JUDGE YOU! We have an ability to think others judge us based on what we judge ourselves for. Just pause for a second in your reading and think…what you’re afraid others will judge you for is really what you judge yourself for, isn’t it? So whose judgment are you really concerned about?

STOP JUDGING OTHERS Judging is a bad habit to get in. The more we judge others, the more we think they judge us. It’s an ongoing vicious cycle that you must break. So, instead of judging people, appreciate them for what they are. See others as your teachers, helping you to learn about life, improve your life, and develop into a better person.

REALIZE IT IS NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU People’s negative reaction or treatment of you says more about them than it does about you. Trust me, this one took a long time to learn. I had a family member, who from day one, had it in for me.

I was clueless as to what her problem was with me. She always had a chip on her shoulder and I was the one, when around her, that she hurled that chip at and most of the time I let it hit me. After a couple of decades, I realized there were qualities and traits in me that she wanted, so it made her feel better to put me down than to look at herself and try to improve. Instead of working on herself, she did everything in her power to hurt me. I took it personally thinking I was a bad person and even went to counseling over it. I’ll never forget, the first time with my counselor, I shared all the mean things my family member had done to me over the many years, how I tried to smooth things over, and my counselor said, “I hate to tell you this, but the wrong person is sitting here with me. I’d say the person with the axe to grind should be in therapy.” He was right.

There are many things that come with age and one is self acceptance and awareness. When you doubt yourself, it is easy to think others think negatively about you. But when you see yourself as an ever progressing and evolving person, you will give yourself the breaks that you deserve.

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