FW May 2020

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IN THIS ISSUE

22

24

32

COVER STORY

38

12 Helping Our Homeless 14 Squirrels Overhead 20 The Power of Financial Balances 26 Retirement Living Rooted In Wellness 40 Naps are for Grownups, too 42 Making Dollars, Making $ense 46 ReDESIGNS by Ava 54 Loving Yourself First 60 A Farmer’s Tale 70 Hustle & Heart 80 Celebrations

Check out our online calendar at ForsythWoman.com 8 | ForsythWoman.com

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May 2020 | 9

The View From This Side MAY 2020

Who would have thought that our kids, grandkids, nieces, and nephews would be finished with school? Or at least – school as we know it! And who knew homeschooling would become our norm? As far as working from home goes – this has been my normal for years, but I know that for many this is a very different experience.

It has broken my heart to see so many small business owners who have been forced to close their doors as they were designated “non-essential,” especially when we know they ARE essential to the success of our local economy!

Hi, Everyone…. Stating that this has been the weirdest, craziest month ever would NOT be an understatement. And I know every one of you feels this way, too. In all the conversations I’ve had since March, NO ONE could have predicted what our world has been going through over the last few weeks. And even now, as we prepare to send the May issue to the printer, there is so much uncertainty to even write The View! Is what I’m saying at this moment even going to be relevant when this comes back from the printer?

And my heart swells with pride and gratitude at those who do serve in those businesses that are defined as essential – the grocery store workers, the gas station attendants, banking employees, postal workers, and of course, the nurses and doctors who are fighting this battle on the front lines. How will we ever thank them for all they are doing to serve and care for us during this difficult time?

What has really amazed me, though, amid all these challenges, is how so many have adapted in order to meet the needs of their customers, and adjusted in order to keep their employees safe and employed.

We’ve seen creative, outside-the-box thinking and solutions emerge as the spirit of American ingenuity continues to thrive, despite the circumstances.

I can’t help but remember the America post-9/11. We emerged from that nightmare as a kinder country with a far more patriotic spirit. Unfortunately, over time, we slipped back into complacency. It’s my sincere hope that the positive in all of this means that we will emerge (and stay) a kinder, more compassionate, more understanding, more loving people. No matter what happens in the days and weeks and months ahead, COVID-19 has changed the world. It’s up to us to make sure the changes grow us and challenge us….

That we don’t let the changes hurt us and destroy the communities and country we love so much.

We are in this together, and we are stronger when we work together. The magazines have been facing the biggest distribution challenge of our 15 years in business. We are so thankful to the businesses who continue to let us distribute the magazines and the neighborhood ambassadors who have made it their mission to get the positive words of Forsyth Magazines into the hands of others during our time of quarantine. Our social media team has knocked it out of the park with their out-of-the box thinking and we couldn’t be happier with the results! In addition, we have been posting online exclusive articles almost daily that we continue to get great feedback on.

If you haven’t connected with us on social media, please go and check us out. Search Forsyth Woman and Forsyth Family magazines on Facebook and @Forsythmags on Instagram.

Thank you for reading. I always close with a call to support our advertising partners but NEVER has it been more important. Read their articles. Share their stories. Do business with them if you can.

Let them know they are Until next time, seen. Show them your support. It matters now more than ever, and more than words can say.

Keela

PUBLISHER

ADVERTISING

SENIOR STAFF WRITERS

Keela Johnson | Keela@ForsythMags.com

Advertising@ForsythMags.com

Meghan Corbett | Denise Heidel | Carolyn Peterson

EDITOR Brooke Eagle | Brooke@ForsythMags.com

EDITOR’S ASSISTANT & EVENT SPECIALIST Madison Hill

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Tamara Bodford

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Brooke Eagle Heather Spivey

INTERN Alexandra Johnson

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Vonda Henderson

COVER PHOTOGRAPHER JEJ Photos

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS JEJ Photos Photo Artistry by Melinda

CONTENT EDITORS Kim Beane Meghan Corbett (Assistant)

OTHER CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Debbie Barr | Courtney Bravinder | Jen Brown | Elisa Coppede Rebecca Cooper | June DeLugas | Lisa Doss | Martie Emory Julie Fritz | Taryn Jerez | Jean Marie Johnson | Vic Khemsara Ava Lewandowski | Jon Marzano | Olivia Orme Susan Schabacker | Megan Taylor | Sara Wiles | David Willard

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FORSYTH WOMAN DISCLAIMER: Please note that the inclusion of stories and articles in Forsyth Woman magazine does not imply endorsement of products or people. The views of the authors are

presented for information and entertainment only, and may not necessarily reflect the views of Forsyth Woman. Specifically, Forsyth Woman in no way endorses any claim associated with health and/or well being with respect to any particular person. We disclaim all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose. We will not be held responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage that is caused or alleged to have been caused in connection with the use of, or reliance on, any content in this magazine. Forsyth Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Forsyth Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned. Forsyth Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited. ©2005 by Forsyth Woman, Inc.

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May 2020 | 11

Helping Our Homeless

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

Everyone needs some help at some point in their lives. Some need more support than others, and lots of people in Forsyth County need assistance with daily living. Being homeless often goes beyond just needing housing.

Some need a handout, and others need a hand up.

The homeless may be in need of job assistance, counseling, or medical care.

Or, they may just need food, drink, and toiletries. Life is not easy living on the streets, and neither is never knowing what tomorrow may bring if you lack resources and support.

Fortunately, there are noble and notable organizations locally to help support our homeless individuals and their families through donations and volunteer efforts.

Want to help our homeless? Here’s how you can lend a hand and volunteer your time to helping their lives improve.

EVERYONE NEEDS TO EAT AND DRINK

It’s difficult to see anyone struggling to survive, sifting through the trashcans on the streets and picking things up from the ground, but don’t give them money.

Instead, offer healthy snacks, drinks, or even an inexpensive hot meal from a local restaurant.

Snacks can be lifesavers and are hard to come by if you’re homeless. They help sustain you throughout the day and are especially important for those with blood sugar issues. A healthy snack can make all the difference. Instead of giving the homeless potato chips or candy bars, nab a bag of clementines that have no seeds and are easy to peel, not to mention delicious and nutritious. Other portable fruits like apples and bananas are good options, too. If you can wash the apples ahead of time to remove dirt, bacteria, or pesticides, that’s even better since it’s hard for the homeless to access a sink. Individually wrapped granola bars, dried fruit, and nuts are a good idea, too, and are lightweight to carry around.

Water bottles are always a good idea!

Pop some in your tote for when you’re out and about. You never know when you’ll run into someone in need, so get prepared with provisions to offer them.

Get in the habit of giving.

Unused toiletries from your hotel stays?

Collect them and bring them to your local homeless shelter(s). Here is a checklist of toiletries (mini, travel-sized versions are often best) and other handy items you can give out or donate.

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Small tissue packets Band-Aids Alcohol wipes Facial wipes Baby wipes Diapers Baby lotion Feminine hygiene products First-aid kits

Toothbrushes, toothpaste, and floss

Nail files

Soap and body wash

Combs and brushes

Washcloths

Notepads and pens

Shampoo

New bedding (e.g., sheets, blankets, throws, quilts, pillows and pillowcases)

Lotion Sunscreen

Razors

up the little ones’ lives. Bored with your board games? Donate them!)

Water bottles Baby formulas Coffee Teabags

Chapstick

Clothing (Including underwear, socks and baby clothes)

Nail clippers

Toys and games (Light

Healthy snacks

Deodorant

Fruit juice and seltzer

HOW YOU CAN HELP

Though used items can be helpful, new is always best. Don’t have a big budget? Head to your local dollar store. Just $5 worth could help five peoples’ lives. Tight on money? Save your next meal out and get some necessities for the homeless, nothing fancy or too expensive. When it comes to surviving the streets, the basics and essentials are best.

Some have money; others have time. Even with just a little bit of time, you can help the homeless.

Volunteer to serve a meal at your local soup kitchen, read books to kids and/or bring in a therapy dog to brighten their day. Got musical talent? Bring in your instrument of choice and sing some songs to lift spirits and put a smile on their faces. Prefer to do your own thing? Plan and organize a hygiene-for-thehomeless drive. Collect and distribute toiletries and other personal care items or food and beverages.

You don’t have to be rich or have oodles of time to help the homeless. The important thing is that you make an effort to reach out to support others’ lives. All that good giving will come back to you in unexpected ways, and you will always feel good when helping others.

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May 2020 | 13

Squirrels Overhead

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

I can’t say that I wasn’t forewarned. “There are creatures in the attic, flying squirrels and mice and such. But they’ve never gotten into the house.” Grateful for the unlimited use of a delightful cottage in the woods overlooking a tranquil lake – I considered the little creatures part of the charm. At least in the beginning.

I quickly realized that my four-legged roommates were a force to be reckoned with.

Tumbling and careening on the bare wooden rafters overhead, I wondered How many were there? It sounded like a circus convention for four-legged acrobats and the shenanigans went on night after noisy night. Since the acrobats seemed to prefer the space over the bedroom, I claimed the settee in the kitchenliving area as my own.

Steve reassured me that he was taking swift action. And, true to his word, I saw the tell-tale ladder and trap, evidence of the animal control guy having been there while I was at work.

Great! Tonight they will find themselves cut off at the pass. But unbeknownst to me, the fun was just about to begin…

As night descended upon the still lake, I settled in for my evening reading and the acrobats made their way back “home.” By-passing the trap, they went straight for the rafters, noisier than before, frantic, it seemed to me. Suddenly, I heard a loud crashing sound and realized that the trap was working after all. Between the periodic crash of the trap and the careening in the rafters, I knew I was in for a long, restless night. Little did I know what a night it would be.

I suddenly sprung upright. It sounded as if one of the flying creatures was in the house itself.

Oh, no….!!!! I tiptoed gingerly toward the back bedroom, took a quick peek and slammed the door shut. Must be my over-worked imagination. But no, I hear it. I drew the door open about an inch and saw a squirrel climbing on the inside of the bedroom window. In a flash, he jumped to the windowsill, faster than my eye could follow. My heart flew to my throat and I slammed the door.

Reaching for my cell phone, I dialed 911.

“There is a squirrel in my bedroom. I need help.” “Ma’am, where are you?” the calm voice inquired. My phone went dead. Twenty very long minutes later, having attempted a speedy battery recharge, I reached the voice again.

“It’s the Squirrel Lady, and I’m at 94 Mountain Road. Please send someone.” I squished a throw rug against the bedroom door and waited.

Finally, a vehicle creeps up the pitchblack road and I wave my arms in front of the large window. An appropriately hulk-like man casually swaggers in.

I take him to the barricaded door.

We look in. “I don’t see anything.”

“He’s right there, on the bookshelf,” “Oh, yeah,” he chuckles. Well, here’s the number to Animal Control.”

“Animal Control? Can’t you get him out of here?” “ No, ma’am. I’m sorry, but I can’t.” He leaves.

It’s 1:15 a.m. I decide to sit it out until daybreak.

Suddenly, there’s a creaking sound RIGHT OVER MY HEAD. I look up. A squirrel is circulating on the overhead ceiling fan as though it were a carnival ride. I had half a mind to turn that sucker on high, just to see how he’d enjoy a high-speed version of the ride. “You stay right there and don’t even think about coming down.

Just stay there!” With my eyes on him, I reached for my belongings and he obeyed.

It was now after 2 a.m. I opened the door to the cottage and was greeted by a poorly-tuned chorus of squirrel-hostages all crammed together in the trap. My God, just how many were there???? I threw my things into my car and proceeded carefully down the pitch-black mountain road.

There was only one place to go at this hour: the police station.

Shamelessly, I walk in. “It’s the Squirrel Lady. She says they’re spinning around on the ceiling fan.”

I spent the next three hours sitting on an orange vinyl chair in a brightly lit room, eagerly awaiting the break of day and a very strong cup of coffee.

14 | ForsythWoman.com

We now have

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May 2020 | 15

You watched us grow and prosper.

Vic Khemsara, MD

Now it is time for us to give back to our Moms .

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MOTHERS’ DAY

BY VIC KHEMSARA, MD

Keith Biggs, OD

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.

– 1 Chronicles 16:34

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After all the tragedy of the COVID19 epidemic, it is time to pause and show appreciation to our mothers. It is time to think of how we can show extra love to your mom on her special day. Mothers from the start of time have consistently been the driving force behind the upbringing of the children.

Whether it is the morning pancakes, Sunday dinners, homework study sessions, bed time stories, driving to and from activities that are often discussed about our childhoods, the stories always include the never-ending, unselfish sacrifices of our moms. Mothers understand that the most precious gift any child can receive is the selfless, unconditional love imparted to them.

Mothers should be honored every day, but once a year on a special May day we proudly celebrate these extraordinary women and express our appreciation

and gratitude to them. Our love is often expressed by taking them out for a nice spa day, inundating them with flowers and messages of love or treating them to their favorite restaurant for a special meal. Unfortunately, this year may be different with all the illness, uncertainty, and fear in our world for 2020. We may need to rethink our normal expressions of love.

Our mothers take care of us from birth. They feed us, clothe us, mend our childhood scrapes and support us during our adult years. There does come a time that with every passing year our mothers may begin to walk a little slower, be a little more forgetful, or their eyesight may not be what it was 5 or ten years ago. Whether we are able to lavish our moms with candy, flowers and fanfare, let’s also give them a gift more meaningful. Let’s be certain that

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Addressing any optical concerns early on can greatly benefit her on how she views the world during the aging process. We know nothing is more precious than the gift of sight that allows mothers to see their children and grandchildren as they live out the rest of their lives. Here at Summit Eye Care we are ready to meet all of your mother’s eye needs and keep her world a beautiful place.

COVID19: Our prayers go out to everyone during this tragic time. Summit Eye Care stands ready to assist anyway we can. We pray that when the May issue of Forsyth Woman is distributed, we will be through the worst and on the way to recovery. God bless.

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The Woman Behind the Uniform:

The Military Wife

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

The story usually begins with a formidable, cannot live without you type of love! Laura knew John two years before he decided to enlist and give his mind, spirit and body to the United States Marines.

With a box of tissues in her lap, she spent hours watching movies to survive 13 long weeks, while John transitioned through three phases of endurance training comprising history and customs, martial arts and survival, and marksmanship training. Sculpted in body, and appearing more focused after boot camp, John and Laura spent hours reminiscing over great times with friends and discussed life together. At the sight of the silver ring, she willingly surrendered and said “yes!” Laura envisioned their married life globe-trotting in and out of continents and countries while holding the hands of their children. Days before they left for California, John’s grandfather handed Laura a wellworn 1955 edition of “The Marine Corps Wife.” George said only three words, “You’ll need this!”

John is a third-generation Marine. Throughout his life, he coveted Grandpa and Dad’s stories of war and heroism, seeing the world and the bonds formed through brotherly comradery.

Black-and-white framed photos without a speck of dust lined the walls in Grandpa’s study. Life, as he knew, was defined through the principles of order, hard work, God and family, and respect.

Completing boot camp was a step in fulfilling his dream. Laura’s optimism and level-headedness brought him peace. John knew she’d quickly make friends and adapt to military life.

HONEYMOON

Conditioning began with the frequent sighting of tanks, low-flying helicopters and five-mile-per-hour speed limit signs. “Reveille” played at 6:30am, and each evening brought the mournful melody of “Retreat” at precisely 5pm. Neighbors introduced themselves and periodically came over to talk. In learning about her fellow military spouses, she met the cheerful, stoic doctor whose husband was out of contact for nine months and a bride, like her, who just graduated from high school.

By the luck of the lottery, base housing supplied a three-bedroom row house. The thin walls included a feeling of surround-sound, which comprised of mumbled conversations, periodic infants’ screams and evenings of boisterous laughter or arguments.

NEWLYWEDS

In the evening, a mere one-month later, Laura helped soak John’s blistered feet in rubbing alcohol and water. He shared the unfortunate story of meeting with his first sergeant, who said, “Get your family under control!”

Laura failed to dismount and render

18 | ForsythWoman.com

the proper honors to the United States colors, a severe offense. The rules require service members and civilians to politely stop, face the flag with a hand over heart, and show proper respect for the raising or retiring of the flag!

Coming home from work, most people have the luxury of relaxing or leaving the house to enjoy a meal. In a military marriage, duty is primary. Laura sat for hours at the base barbershop awaiting John’s weekly haircut. Calls arrived all hours of the day, seven days a week. While most newly married couples planned vacations and weekend getaways, military couples operated on a “duty first, family second” mentality. John received orders to leave in a moment’s notice to participate in “operational tempo” and “leave blocks” associated with weeks of training or long-term deployments. Weeks of sitting on the couch, listening to the sounds of active families made Laura feel more alone. While the separation had the potential to overshadow personal goals and aspirations, wives can either spend years in misery or find a means to find the best in every situation.

TENTH ANNIVERSARY

Divorce is common among military families. The danger of missions and rotational deployments significantly impacts the ability of wives or husbands to remain committed to the lifestyle. Laura, guided by friends and the archaic yet applicable “The Marine Corp Wife” handbook, provided valuable lessons to enjoy the struggles and blessings of marriage. She could account for years together and apart. The mindset changed as John witnessed the birth of two children, both boys, via Skype. Laura raised the boys as both father and mother while John served his country. A sacrifice when the love of country and duty comes first, but to families, it becomes a real honor.

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The Power of Financial Balances

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

Debt is a common household worry. Mortgages, loans, auto and credit cards represent the most significant financial obligation among Americans. It’s natural to want the liberty of debt freedom while establishing a nest egg! In the greater plan, both are viable!

KEEP A WRITTEN RECORD

Accounting software programs and handheld notebook-style ledgers offer two separate visual ways to keep a record of each month’s checks and balances. Any new program takes roughly three months to tweak and make it work; therefore, don’t give up too soon!

ELIMINATE MAIL DELAYS

Each time a billing statement arrives either in your email or mailbox, take a few minutes to look at specific details, such as the balance, principal and interest amounts, date of payment and penalties. Online bill-pay programs allow clients to organize their bills and create recurring and individual payments up to one year in advance through a userfriendly website.

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR EXPENSES

In 10 minutes, you could have a reduced bill. All it takes is a phone call!

• Contact banking institutions to determine whether you can lower a high-interest rate. Rather than hold onto a higher percentage rate, look into balance transfer programs. Usually, the obligation is a nominal flat rate for a period of 12 to 18 months.

• Energy companies and cellular phone networks offer credits to

20 | ForsythWoman.com

government employees, teachers and other professionals. Some companies will discount a bill by $10 to establish an automatic payment plan.

• Cable companies offer reduced rates for “bundling.” Call today to see whether or not you are eligible!

SAVING

Everyone needs an emergency fund. By including “savings” in your budget, you’ll find substantial cash on hand to fulfill the rainyday plans or a genuine need. Just think, saving $75 monthly can expand to $900 after 12 months.

Determine whether you can afford to keep $50 per paycheck with bimonthly or weekly payments.

• Establish a monthly Christmas, child or vacation fund. Setting aside money for a specific cause or event allows the spirit to hold onto a positive future dream!

• Create an insurance account through your bank. Rather than pay monthly, store the savings and pay bi-annually.

ELIMINATE OVERSPENDING

Two areas of uncontrollable spending are monthly purchases and food expenses. Begin by creating a budget and allotting your family a specific amount for each. Consider a viable plan that works for you and takes minutes to accomplish. One solution is to apply for a cashback credit card for just food expenses or monthly needs. With the weekly effort of check balancing and pending amounts, the card can boost your credit by operating on a zero balance.

ADDITIONAL TIPS

• Pack a lunch and extra snacks to save from buying overpriced items at vending machines and gas stations.

• Carry a cold thermos daily!

• Do not stop at the grocery store after work; instead, create a weekly meal plan and shop once a week.

• Compare shop before buying an item. You might find it cheaper elsewhere.

REFINANCING A MORTGAGE

The concept sounds too good to be true until you look at the financial losses. Fees may comprise an additional $5,000 to $10,000 to your current balance and spread over 15 to 30 years. The best solution is to add extra money, providing annually a 13th payment. Over time, your mortgage will shed off years and work similarly to that once-soughtafter lowered rate!

ASK YOURSELF, “DO I NEED THIS?”

The cherry red truck may have extra cargo room, hidden compartments and an EcoDiesel engine. It’s what you always wanted!

For the price tag of $32,000, could you survive driving a $14,000 used SUV? Shoppers ask themselves similar questions every day when comparing apples to oranges. There are numerous ways to reduce your bills. Ask yourself, “Can I eliminate my landline? Would I be content watching YouTube and Netflix and cancel cable television?

Sacrifice is not easy; yet, a larger goal is at stake. With unmanageable debt paid off, there will be a time when you no longer need to walk away and say, “I wish I could!”

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Pillow Talk, Colorful and Classic With (hopefully) the coronavirus behind us, I am so excited by the promise of spring. A friend had to stage a miniintervention when she saw the rainbow of bright and pastel colors she had viewed at a local paint store.

Spring is the season for sprucing up the home! April showers not only bring May flowers, but also May showers: baby showers, wedding showers, graduation parties, Mother’s Day gatherings, and a host of other events all lend themselves to welcoming visitors to your home.

It’s easy to see why you have been bitten by the color bug.

The market trends for spring are beautiful blues in every spectrum, designed to tempt us all. Take a deep breath, relax, and accessorize. Visualize the room you are working on as a blank canvas. If you have a neutral background, such as neutral colored walls, floors, and large furniture pieces that are neutral in color, you can have a field day adding bursts of color using quality accessories, like bright throw pillows and area rugs. New lighting is another wonderful way to light up your room in both color and function.

Next, select some artwork that makes your space unique.

We represent many local artists at our design center, and I can think of no better way to add color and personality to your room. Original art is a great conversation starter when you have a bevy of guests in your home.

Bring the outdoors in with a colorful sculpture that reflects nature. This year has been a great year, so far, for our designer pillows. We buy them, and they sell almost as quickly as we get them in. Every color of the spectrum can be used with pillows.

PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF © THIBAUT, INC.

Pillows are a great way to change out a room quickly. For me, I just did that in my own house. I love pillows and lamps, for those of you that don’t know. That brings another subject to mind, lamps. New lamps can update

22 | ForsythWoman.com

your home just as quickly. If you are up for it, painting your home brings a fresh look as well. Going lighter is the trend. We are the trending design firm in the area and keep up with what is coming.

We like to stay ahead of the curve.

If any of your guests are spending the night, keep a throw blanket at the foot of their bed for extra color and cover. Our Bella Notte bedding has some of the greatest throws for all of your rooms.

They have great colors and great quality. We have other brands as well to select from. I don’t know about you, but I am so glad to see spring and summer finally arriving. May is a blessed month, and the month that my first granddaughter is to be born.

I can’t wait, and I’m beside myself. I know a lot of my customers love reading Dear June and what better place than Dear June than to make this announcement.

We love hearing about your projects.

Happy spring and summer,

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May 2020 | 23

Writers Who Read

Calling All Historical Fiction Fans

One of my all-time favorite genres to read is historical fictional. I’m a history lover and can spend hour after hour reading a historical fiction novel. The mix of real events and a made-up tale, what more could a reader want?

Throughout the years, our writers and myself have read many novels from this genre. For May’s “Writers Who Read,” let’s look at our favorite historical fiction reads including The Book Thief, Before We Were Yours,” and “The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society.”

THE BOOK THIEF

BEFORE WE WERE YOURS

Nominated as one of PBS’s The Great American Read and quoted by The New York Times as being “the kind of book that can be life-changing,” The Book Thief is set between 1939 – 1943 in Nazi Germany. Living outside of Munich in the fictional town of Molching, nine-year-old orphan Liesel Meminger’s life changes when she finds the book, The Gravedigger’s Handbook, by her brother’s grave. Liesel takes this book home with her; yet, she doesn’t know how to read. With the help of her foster father, Liesel learns to read and falls in love with novels and their characters. Unable to retrieve or buy books, Liesel begins stealing them from Nazi book-burnings, the mayor’s wife’s library, and other places throughout the city.

Life gets turned upside down when her family hides a Jewish man in her basement (remember it is Germany 1939 – the time of Adolf Hitler).

Published in 2005, readers are taken through a journey of living in a dangerous time, Liesel’s confident actions, and her life after the war. The Book Thief is overshadowed by the theme of death, but gives readers a chance to have indepth discussions about the book’s theme rather than feeling a sense of grief. The Book Thief is a must-read for historical fiction fans, especially ones who love World War II.

Writer Jean Marie Johnson classifies the novel, Before We Were Yours, as “hard to put down.” “Everyone in my book club had a heartfelt response to this compelling read,” stated Johnson. Published in 2017, readers are introduced to twelve-year-old Rill Foss and her four younger siblings living in Memphis, Tennessee during 1939. The Foss family lives on a Mississippi River shanty boat. However, their family’s lives are quickly changed when their father rushes their mother to the hospital one stormy night, leaving Rill in charge. While their parents are gone, their boat is captured by strangers who put the children in the care of the Tennessee Children’s Home Society orphanage. The children are told they will be given back to their parents, however, things quickly change and they realize the world they once knew is no longer there. Readers are also brought into present day Aiken, South Carolina and meet Avery Stafford, a wealthy and successful federal prosecutor. She returns home to help her father with his health, but is thrown into a journey that makes her discover her family’s long-hidden history.

“This story is a compassionate account of a family’s grief, love, and lives torn apart by a ‘child abduction for pay’ practice based on historical fact that gives insight into an institution and the many ‘rich and powerful’ who turned a blind eye to its practices,” said Johnson. “It is written with skill, compassion, grace, and respect for children and families deemed society’s outcasts.”

by Markus Zusak

by Lisa Wingate

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

THE GUERNSEY LITERARY & POTATO PEEL PIE SOCIETY

by Mary Ann Shaffer & Annie Barrows Set in London, England 1946, shortly after World War II, writer Juliet Ashton is on the mission for her next book. Living on the island of Guernsey, Charles Lamb comes across one of Ashton’s books. The two begin to exchange letters and Ashton is introduced to Lamb’s life, friends, and the new Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. Lamb and the other members create this society in response to breaking the curfew set in place by the Germans occupying the island. Through the letters, Ashton learns about the island of Guernsey, their books, and the German occupation.

Along the way, she finds an idea for her new novel and a new way of life in Guernsey. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is a perfect read for people of all ages.

If you are looking for your next novel to read, these three are great options for not only historical fiction fans, but book lovers everywhere.

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RETIREMENT LIVING ROOTED IN WELLNESS TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOMESTEAD HILLS, CALL THEIR LIFESTYLE ADVISORS AT (336) 770-2024 OR VISIT WWW.HOMESTEAD-HILLS.COM

Synonymous with excellence in senior living, Homestead Hills is Winston-Salem’s premier retirement community. Nestled on 37 acres of tranquil nature and rolling hills, this community is committed to helping people live longer, healthier, happier lives. Homestead Hills prides itself on providing a holistic approach to retirement living. “There is peace of mind for our Members that everything is taken care of,” said Anne Letsky, one of the community’s lifestyle advisors. Members have the freedom to create their own schedules as the community plays host each day to wellness programs, social activities, clubs, and freshly prepared dining options, all conveniently located in one place.

In addition to the upscale amenities, Members have high-quality on-site care available as the community offers a broad array of services including Independent Living, Assisted Living, Memory Care, Skilled Nursing, and Rehab.

Offering a full spectrum of refined amenities and innovative services, the community has continually pushed the boundaries to create a repertoire of award-winning programs.

Homestead Hills has won the Argentum Senior Living National ‘Best of the Best’ Award five times for programs like J.O.Y (Joining Older and Younger social events), C.L.I.M.B. (lower body strength program), and WAVES (Aquatic Fitness for those with Alzheimer’s and dementia).

“Our lifestyle is based on wellness,” said Jay Matthews, the community’s executive director. “Wellness isn’t just working out three days per week; it consists of eating balanced meals, remaining in good physical shape, enjoying conversations with friends, and receiving the care that they may require.”

The community’s leadership works together to ensure that each of these pillars is accessible for Members each day.

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A CULINARY CELEBRATION At Homestead Hills, Members delight in full-service dining, which emphasizes a variety of freshly prepared meals and elegant dining experiences. Meals are crafted under the direction of Sara Aguilar, the community’s Director of Dining Services, as well as Executive Chef Michael Nasrallah, and Registered Dietitian Nutritionist Mary Kate Schaible.

Menu options are unique day-to-day, and each meal can be customized to the Members’ requests. “We want Members to enjoy their dining experience and our team is happy to customize the meals to their specifications,” said Chef Michael.

Chef Michael has worked with Members to build and refresh the team’s dining proficiency through his monthly community cooking demonstrations entitled ‘Chef Michael Show.’ Each month he chooses a different theme, including a class on order customization, Halloween themed pumpkin carving and Bourbon Heritage Month.

Each day, their dining department is going above and beyond to ensure that Members are enjoying a unique variety of meals.

SOCIAL EXCELLENCE According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 11 million, or 28% of people aged 65 or older live alone. Living alone does not inevitably lead to social isolation, but it can be a contributing factor. To ensure that Members have the opportunity to interact with their peers and neighbors, they are encouraged to participate in a full calendar of daily events. Events include art class, bible study, choir, hobby clubs, day trips, guest lecturers, lunch outings, movie

night, trivia, cooking classes, billiards, and more. “I enjoy making people happy, and do it every chance I get to,” said Christie Martin, social director. “When we are focusing on our Members having a good time, is when the fun comes naturally.”

Additionally, one day each month, residents and staff participate in a ‘Signature Experience’ where each activity that day is connected to the theme through food, fitness, and fun.

Recent themes include Jekyll and Hyde, The Andy Griffith Show, and British Invasion. The Members eagerly anticipate the Signature Events all month long!

WELLNESS Wellness plays an integral role in the lives of residents and Wellness Director Meagan Isaacs is at the helm of the award-winning wellness programming. “Our members are motivated and excited to continue their fitness journey, and I have the privilege of being a part of it,” she says. The wellness team works one-on-one and in group settings with Members in classes that are held throughout the week. Over 15 unique classes are held during the week, including Men in Motion, Sole Strength, Line Dancing, Wake Up Workout, Water Aerobics, Tai Chi, and more. These classes assist in relaxation, better sleep, standing, balance, and flexibility, all of which are important for seniors.

The Staff at Homestead Hills are committed to providing exceptional dining, social, and wellness experiences for their Members. Homestead Hills is located in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, just minutes from Wake Forest University. For more information on Homestead Hills, visit HomesteadHills.com or call (336) 814-2832.

Homestead Hills

May 2020 | 27

Remote Presentation Skills

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

“Hey, let’s hop on a Zoom video call, I think it would be better for us to see each other! See you in 10.”

Cue panic.

Video calls can instill massive amounts of stress, anxiety, and nervousness – all because it’s a new medium for many of us! As someone who both presents online (a lot!) and currently teaches folks how to present and speak in real life and remotely, there are a handful of things you can immediately start doing to feel better about your remote presentation skills:

DO REMEMBER WHERE THE CAMERA IS Cameras are like eyeballs. Connect with the camera like you would with a person. Eye contact establishes trust – and without it, what’s the point in communication?

The other side of this concerns your camera angle. You want to frame yourself, so there is a bit of space around your head. Having the camera at eye level is great – I usually stack my computer on books or a box when I’m doing any video chat or meeting.

This also gives you the space to move around!

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DON’T WORRY ABOUT YOUR CHILD, ROOMMATE, SPOUSE, PARTNER, PET…

Normal times? I would say, ‘Hey! Try to find a quiet space!’

These are not normal times.

Do not worry if there is a cry or noise or bark – we are all figuring out this new normal together. You don’t have to apologize for an interruption.

This whole situation is an interruption.

DO TAKE NOTES If you don’t take notes during inperson meetings, now is a great time to lean into that practice.

Set your notes up either in front of your computer or off to the side and refer to them whenever necessary. Take notes of questions and comments you have while others are talking, bring notes into meetings and conversations, refer to your notes as much as you need to – and use them afterward to jot down big takeaways and action items.

DON’T STRESS ABOUT HOW YOU LOOK

Yes, you should shower. No, you shouldn’t obsess about wearing a full face of makeup and perfectly framing yourself in a shot. Yes – make sure you’re not cutting off your head! Or just showing your forehead! But too often I see people paying so much attention to how they look they forget to listen to the person talking! Here’s the best advice: be comfortable as the best version of you. If that’s putting on makeup, great. If it’s wearing leisurewear on the bottom and a professional-ish shirt on the top, also great.

DO OFFER YOURSELF GRACE

This isn’t normal. I repeat, this isn’t normal. What we’re dealing with right now as a country and society isn’t “business as usual” – if you forget to mute your mic, or unmute your mic – when you’re on a call or meeting, don’t spend the rest of the week beating yourself up about it.

It happens, learn from it and next time, click the mute or unmute. Now isn’t the time to stress about a mistake that everyone will do at least once or twice a week during this time.

DON’T FORGET TO LISTEN

Video is difficult because we don’t have body language to fall back on – we’re dealing with facial expressions, tone, cadence, and words – that’s it! You have to pay attention at a much higher level to continue to connect with what the other person – and people! – are trying to get across.

This is a great place to utilize your notes. If you’re having trouble listening, you can lean on the copious notes you’re taking. Or, better yet, use the act of note-taking as your “task” to keep you on track.

And above all, you got this.

Restoration Med Spa

May 2020 | 29

Dr. Adam Katz of Wake Forest Baptist Health Considering options for self-renewal?

BY MARTIE EMORY

Women are reminded daily that taking care of themselves is the right thing to do.

This may involve physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being and renewal, and for some, it may entail considerations for ‘rejuvenating’ surgical procedures such as the “Mommy Makeover.”

A mentor and leader in his field with over 20 years of experience, Dr. Adam J. Katz, is Director of the Plastic Surgery Research Laboratory at Wake Forest Baptist Health, and Professor of Plastic Reconstructive Surgery. As he navigates a variety of patient scenarios every day, Dr. Katz points to the “Mommy Makeover” as one of his more popular requests, but is quick to stress those procedures are not one size fits all.

“After realizing the wear and tear of pregnancy and then breastfeeding, some women start to consider their options for surgical treatment of physical changes that may become more noticeable with time,” he explains. In short, he says these moms want to reclaim their earlier days of youth. Although there is no specific age that is best for having a Mommy Makeover, an important consideration is whether a woman is planning on having additional children or not. Long-lasting surgical changes are most likely to occur when a woman has no further plans to become pregnant, and when she has committed to positive lifestyle changes such as quitting smoking, losing weight, and habitual exercise.

An initial consultation with Dr. Katz begins with identifying a patient’s specific concerns and aligning them with one or more procedures from a list of varied possibilities. Patient safety is always the first and foremost consideration. Whether a woman has questions and concerns about breast enlargement or lifting, loose or excess skin on the abdomen or thighs, or maybe a bulging abdomen without loose skin, Dr. Katz thoroughly discusses the details of each potential procedure, as well as the risks associated with each. He also discusses reasonable expectations for downtime and recovery.

It’s important to both hear and understand a patient’s concerns, as well as perform a thorough examination, in order to plan the right treatment, he explains. For example, sometimes a woman might come in thinking she wants her breasts enlarged, but really what is best for her is a lift procedure. They are two very different operations, and it is important for the patient to understand these differences.

“Sharing and explaining this type of information with a patient is an important part of what I do,” he says.

“For most procedures, initial recovery time is about two weeks. By four weeks, most can resume their work schedule and a moderate level of activity, and in six weeks, they can be back to their full exercise routine.”

He also finds many patients have a pre-conception that there are fewer risks associated with “cosmetic” surgery.

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“Surgery is surgery,” he explains. “There’s also a misconception there are no scars afterward – but there is always a tradeoff when it comes to scarring.”

Again, for all procedures, the patient’s overall health and safety is the number one consideration on whether or not to proceed.

“Not everyone is a candidate for elective surgery,” says Dr. Katz.

Tummy tucks are typical requests after massive weight loss, and the subject can be a sensitive one. A patient may have worked hard and gathered the courage and determination to come in for an evaluation and to discuss the process, but this does not mean surgery will be offered. All the factors must align – patient safety, patient objectives and expectations, technical considerations, and more. In short, the potential benefit(s) must outweigh the potential risks.

After nearly 20 years of professional practice, Dr. Katz continues to derive meaning and gratification from the relationships he develops with his patients.

“I value the trust patients put in me, and I consider it a privilege to take part in their care,” he says. “Plastic surgery is unique because it is often hard to quantify the positive impact it may have on a patient.

Doing a breast lift, breast enlargement, or abdominoplasty can be life-changing, but it’s a bit harder to measure the impact it has on a patient’s life – such as their confidence, identity, or self-assurance - compared to a heart surgeon, for example, whose work has a clear-cut and very measurable effect on someone’s life and activity. But our work can be lifechanging also, just on different levels, and being part of empowering women is extremely rewarding.”

Dr. Katz is a graduate of Duke University and the University of Michigan Medical School and completed plastic surgery training at the University of Pittsburgh. He is certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery and speaks internationally on a variety of topics related to body contour surgery, breast reconstruction, the science of adipose (fat) tissue, and the potential of regenerative medicine.

For more information or to schedule a consultation with Dr. Katz, call 336-713-0255 or schedule an appointment online at wakehealth.edu. Offices are located at Wake Forest Baptist Health, Medical Center Boulevard, 5th floor, in Winston-Salem, NC.

Brookridge Retirement

May 2020 | 31

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN, PHOTOS BY JEJ PHOTOS

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Folks are constantly looking into hobbies or passions as potential side hustles. A “side hustle” is something you do on top of your full-time job. It’s generally something you enjoy and possibly brings in some money. For a few people, this side hustle becomes something very successful and replaces the shadow of the other job. Whitney Boger’s Swanky and Swag might have been born out of a side passion and hustle, and she may have combined it with her full-time profession, but one thing is for sure – its tremendous growth shows that it’s definitely more than anything on the side.

“I started my first hair salon in 2005 in the Lewisville Corners shopping center at 23 years old. That salon was Bangz Hair Studio,” said Boger, “As hair styling is my passion, I have always had a niche for something more. I love being crafty with decorating and designing, so I started making earrings.”

While Swanky and Swag started in 2017 with earrings, it’s now a creative mashup of a hair salon and boutique. For those of you dreaming about your own brick and mortar adventure, it didn’t make that jump immediately – Boger was selling out of a mobile boutique in 2018 – a 1972 vintage camper – doing vendor events all over the Triad selling bags, jewelry, clothes and more. “This mashup concept is super popular in the Deep South,” said Boger, “And I’m so excited to have brought it to my hometown of Lewisville.”

Over the past year and a half, the boutique has grown tremendously.

Aside from a web presence and free shipping throughout the US, Swanky and Swag has been adding popular brands to their shelves, as well as a Facebook Live event to connect with customers. “While stepping out of my comfort zone, this has been key to connect with our shoppers and let them know we are real people,” said Boger, “And how thankful we are for their choice to shop small business!”

May 2020 | 33

Community is not the only thing that helps Boger continue to run a busy salon and boutique – her co-stylist, Jessica Myers, has been in the industry for 15+ years and started when the doors opened for Bangz Hair Studio in 2005. The boutique is looking forward to adding many new lines in 2020. They recently added Bogg Bag, a fan favorite. “It’s a sturdy and super durable bag that you can take to the beach, ball games, picnics, vacation and anywhere!” said Boger. They also carry Sheila Fajl, Myra bags, Freyr’s eyewear – and if you aren’t a clothes person, they carry jewelry, Pinch Me therapy dough, safety gear like pepper spray and alarms, hats and more.

There’s also a protégé for Boger’s earring design: her daughter, Paisley, sells her earring designs in the store and donates $2 per pair sold to a local animal shelter.

The feeling of Swanky and Swag is exactly what you’d expect: similar to a trip to your closest girlfriend’s house, and Boger is the reason behind the vibe. “I love what I do. It’s definitely not easy, but I have met so many wonderful people, whether it’s behind the chair in the salon or putting together an outfit in the boutique,” said Boger, “I love making people feel good about themselves. When shoppers come in, we want them to feel as if they have walked into their best friend’s home – welcome and open!”

Visit Swanky and Swag at 1313 Lewisville Clemmons Rd, Lewisville, NC 27023, Tuesday through Friday from 10 am – 7 pm and Saturday from 9 am to 4 pm, Closed Sunday and Monday. For more information, visit ShopSwankyandSwag.com or call 336.778.0111.

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Swanky and Swag offers various online discounts that change weekly, as well as free shipping and local delivery!

May 2020 | 35

This column is dedicated to uplifting incredible women that might not be featured in the local news about their accomplishments.

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

These are abridged versions of these incredible women; please find them and ask them more!

JOY NELSON THOMAS NATASHA SMITH

WHAT MAKES YOU YOU?

WHAT MAKES YOU YOU?

My strong beliefs and mindful determination define me most. In my work, these traits fuel me to fight for all girls having equal access and opportunities, and they help me achieve a balance of patience for my efforts. I’ve learned all good things come in time and yet I firmly believe there’s no time like the present.

I’m not sure how to answer this in a “human” way.

If I were interviewing for a job, I’d probably say it’s my ability to persevere. In reality, I think it’s my stubbornness, which I suppose is the flip side to perseverance. Don’t tell me I can’t do something.

Don’t tell me I’m not right for something. I will prove you wrong.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST PROUD OF?

It’s cliché, but it’s my kid. My son enjoys drinking water -- how many 10 year olds do you know who request a glass of cold water with dinner? He’s polite. He’s already interested in making the world a better place -he started organizing for cleaner (i.e., lead-free) water in the 2nd grade (when we were living in Chicago). I suppose that last part he gets honestly -- community activism goes back in my family for generations. My grandmother was Dr. Virginia Newell’s campaign manager in her first run for East Ward Alderman, and I just had another win with Mayor Joines’ primary win.

I’m proud that I’m helping to continue the Gray/Tanner/ Smith legacy of community work in Winston-Salem.

My selfless ways. If I didn’t have a passion to make a difference I wouldn’t have had the chance to reach girls and provide them with skills they will need to live a thriving life.

WHAT KEEPS YOU GOING WHEN THINGS ARE TOUGH? I developed grit that is not easily shaken.

When things are tough I just remember that four years ago someone told me not to open LEAD. Since then, we have served over 450 girls, making a remarkable impact. I always remember those words and I remember tough times don’t last, tough people do.

WHAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT? The thought that some girl may be awake with me, but for a different reason. She may be hungry, she may be scared after being exposed to violence, she may be up crying after being bullied, as I did many nights when I was a teen victim of bullying.

She may be working hard but all the cards are stacked against her because of her family dynamic. I’m up for her at night putting together a strategy to make sure she has a fighting chance.

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WHAT ARE YOU MOST PROUD OF?

WHAT KEEPS YOU GOING WHEN THINGS ARE TOUGH?

Taekwondo. When things are rough, I go to class and take it out on the targets (and sometimes fellow students - HA!). I’m incredibly thankful to Tiger Kim’s for giving me a positive outlet for any frustrations that come my way -- and working in politics means I have a constant supply of frustrations.

WHAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT?

The fear that all I’m doing won’t make a difference.

My son loves to tell people that, “My mommy works all the time. Politics, politics, politics.” Granted, that work gave him the opportunity to meet President Barack Obama, visit the White House, and chat on the phone with Senator Tim Kaine. But what if nothing changes? What if I could have been closing my laptop at 5 pm and having fun with my kid? What if I’m not doing enough?

CELESTE HOLCOMB

WHAT MAKES YOU YOU?

I bring big dreams to the table, and I like to inspire and encourage people, so I’m constantly trying to understand how a large vision translates to material action.

I struggle to synthesize the desires of my mind and the limitations of the real, but the times when I test these limits is when I feel most authentic.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST PROUD OF?

I think people put a lot of faith in me to be capable and to be the person that can get something done. I feel most proud when it seems like I’m living up to the best of what people believe about me.

WHAT KEEPS YOU GOING WHEN THINGS ARE TOUGH?

I deal with chronic illness and had a tough childhood, and I often look backwards to confirm that things really are improving. To affirm that I now have agency and resilience because of the life I’ve built within adversity, and that I can continue on this path.

WHAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT?

I think a lot about what I will be leaving when I die. The finality and mystery of it creates a sense of urgency for me to make a positive impact on everything I touch.

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May 2020 | 37

Class of 2020 S TA Y S E N I OR S T RON G

BY COURTNEY BRAVINDER On a more positive note, this has truly brought many seniors around the world together because of the hardships we are now all going through as one. My family and I have played games and shared stories as we would before phones and the stresses of day to day life came over everyone. Knowing that anyone can get this virus makes it that much scarier and makes people love their families and those close to them that much more. Many look forward to going on senior field trips, or having class day to be recognized for their accomplishments, or even just saying goodbye to their favorite teachers who have helped them through their high school experience, it creates closure and now leaves a lot of uncertainty in the way this last year of high school will end.

Not being able to finish out my senior year because of a worldwide pandemic are words no one was expecting to say in this lifetime. Everyone is saying how sad it is, and I have gotten so many apologies from people who have gone through all those senior year experiences and would hate to go through what I and the class of 2020 are going through right now. It is sad, and we’re allowed to be sad – that is the hardest for me – to allow myself to be sad. People are dying and losing their jobs, and I’m sad that I can’t spend my last few months of high school in school. But I’m allowed to be sad that the dress I bought for my senior year prom will never be worn. I’m allowed to be sad after playing a varsity sport all four years that I won’t have a senior night or even a season. I’m allowed to be sad I may not even be able to walk across that stage and get the diploma I have been waiting 13 years for. I’m allowed to be sad my senior year is being ripped away from me.

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The hardest part for me is being quarantined in my house doing online classes instead of being able to go out and make memories with my friends. Having to go to school through a drive-thru to receive my cap and gown and not even knowing if I will be able to put it on was probably one of the hardest days during all of this madness. School online has been difficult, to say the least. It’s hard to find motivation to do my work while lying in bed, but I know that teachers have put in a lot of time to make this experience easier on us. No one has gone through this before, so finding appropriate measures to make sure the people relying on school lunches and the kids who may not have access to computers are accommodated is something I am blown away by how much people in the community have come together to help those in need. Thankfully, I have decided to further my education at East Carolina University to major in nursing, but I know that many seniors may not have had the luxury of knowing and needed to visit the campus of the place they are going to spend their next four years and are now forced to make a decision based on online tours instead of actually experiencing it. I am currently in a class to get my CNA license to build a base for me to hopefully be a future nurse. Seeing all of the brave and dedicated souls risking their lives and health to help those struggling during this pandemic makes me that much more excited to be able to help down the road.

My dad has reminded me many times during this whole experience that in times of struggle, “everything happens for a reason,” though some days it may be very hard to find that reason, there is one. To all my fellow seniors I know it may be hard, but we were born into this world during the great tragedy of 9/11, and we are now finishing out our high school experience during a global pandemic so I know that we have the will power in us to finish this year no matter the circumstances.

Always remember, it’s about the journey, not the destination.

Stay senior strong.

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May 2020 | 39

ZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZz Did you take a nap today?

Naps are for Grownups,

ZzZzZzZzZzZz

If you’re a typical American adult, you probably did not. Most of us think naps are just for preschoolers and the elderly. But in many countries and cultures around the world, mid-day napping is a normal part of daily life for everyone. In Greece, Mexico, Costa Rica, Italy, Spain, and Ecuador, for example, just about everyone takes an early afternoon snooze. Do these countries know something we don’t? Actually, yes.

Too

NAPPING AT WORK?

Experts tell us that an hour or two after lunch is the ideal time for a nap because that’s when blood sugar levels dip, draining our energy and sabotaging our productivity. The fix is easy: a 20-minute “power nap” that revives us and results in some wonderful benefits, including improved alertness, a brighter mood, and better job performance. American businesses are slowly catching on to the fact that allowing employees to nap is not only good for their bottom line, but it also demonstrates a commitment to employee wellness. Companies that now provide employee nap rooms include Nike, Ben & Jerry’s, Zappos, and Huffington Post.

Since most companies don’t encourage employee naps, and most of us are in “go mode” all day long, only about a third of American adults take naps, according to the Pew Research Center. That’s unfortunate because those who awaken from a nap rejuvenated and alert are less likely to make mistakes, less likely to have an accident, and likely to see a boost in performance. Famous people who embraced the rejuvenating potential of the “power nap” include Winston Churchill, John F. Kennedy, Ronald Reagan, Napoleon, Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison and George W. Bush. Did you notice that all of these highly successful nappers are men? At every age, men are more likely to take naps than women.

WHAT KIND OF NAPPER ARE YOU?

In a National Sleep Foundation survey of 1,488 people (which presumably included both men and women), 35% of the respondents said they don’t nap at all. Among those who said they do, naps fell into three categories:

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BY DEBBIE BARR

Emergency naps. Most people who said they take naps (49%) were emergency nappers—people who give in to the urge to nap when they are suddenly too tired to finish a task or to drive safely.

Habitual naps. Eight percent said they take a nap at the same time every day.

Planned naps. Six percent of the people surveyed plan their naps in advance (also known as “preparatory napping”). Planahead napping is strategic. It means taking a nap when you don’t feel sleepy so that you can stay alert longer than normal, perhaps useful, for example, when you know ahead of time that you will be staying up later than you usually do.

SLEEP AND HEALTH

If a more upbeat mood and better productivity at work are not enough to entice you to take naps, there’s one other benefit of napping to consider: better health. Sleep boosts the immune system.

This can mean, in practical terms, that when those around you are getting sick, if you’re

getting enough sleep, your immune system will be better equipped to fight off the illness. Adults who get the recommended 7-8 hours of sleep at night—or make up for lost sleep with adequate naps—have stronger immune systems. That’s because during sleep, cells throughout your body make and secrete cytokines. Cytokines are proteins that enable your immune system to successfully combat infection and inflammation.

The National Sleep Foundation website advises, “If your sleep schedule is interrupted by a busy workweek or other factors, try to make up for the lost rest with naps. Taking two naps that are no longer than 30 minutes each—one in the morning and one in the afternoon—has been shown to help decrease stress and offset the negative effects that sleep deprivation has on the immune system.”

Sources: 1) sleep.org; 2) sleepfoundation.org: 3) Benefits of napping and an extended duration of recovery sleep on alertness and immune cells after acute sleep restriction, Brain, Behavior, and Immunity, Volume 25, Issue 1, January 2011, pp 16-24.

Second Harvet Food Bank

May 2020 | 41

Making Dollars, Making $ense Securities offered through LPL Financial. Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advice offered through Marzano Capital Group, a registered investment advisor and separate entity from LPL Financial.

What’s the Fallout?

BY JON MARZANO, MANAGING PRINCIPAL

What type of long-term impacts can a national crisis or a pandemic, such as COVID-19, have on a nation or society in general? How do these types of events change the way we view the world post-crisis? I have been in finance for over 20 years, and in that time, we have had no less than four pandemic scares, one great financial recession, wars, several bear markets, and more corrections than I can remember. Is it fair to say that events like 9/11 and the recession that followed, or the Financial Crisis of 2007 and 2008, and “health-related events” like the COVID-19 virus change the course of history going forward? What if we backed up a number of decades and included the Great Depression of the 1930s? More importantly, are there similarities in the way people and economies recover or adapt from events like these?

I have had the privilege to work with many clients who were young adults, some even children, during the 1920s and 1930s. With very little doubt, the post-depression generation had a mentality of being very frugal, of saving at a higher rate and of making sure an emergency fund (and food cellar) were well stocked. Could a bigger factor be the length of the event?

Negativity over time, month after month, and year after year, does wear people down and can give them a feeling of helplessness. The fallout from the Great Depression was much longer, the employment rates on a relative basis much higher, and the poverty level much greater. The better part of a decade in an economic tailspin, with rising rates and very little opportunity, left a generation forever changed.

How about the Financial Crisis of 2007 and 2008? That monumental event spanned just over two years, cut deep into stock prices (to the tune of 50%), and destroyed homeownership for a huge swath of the population.

It was a difficult time for most people and a time where credit from the banks all but dried up. There are similarities between the Financial Crisis and the Great Depression from a structural standpoint, with leverage and risk-taking running rampant both times. The biggest difference in the outcome and long-term fallout to society between the two events was that the government acted more swiftly in the crisis of 2007 and 2008. It acted in ways that stabilized and then stimulated the economy. The Fed cut rates to virtually zero and injected money into the banks to, in turn, pump into the economy to kick start the lending engine again. The Financial Crisis devastated many workers’ savings, eliminated their jobs, and exposed a number of cracks in the system. The events caused laws to be re-written in Washington, similar to what happened after the Great Depression.

The Dodd Frank Act, one of the biggest pieces of legislation to ever be created, was a result of the changes that needed to be put in place. But back to the question – did the Financial Crisis change the way people live, spend, save or plan for the future just like the Great Depression did? Will the recent COVID-19 scare do the same?

I would say an absolute yes to the question about history being forever changed. Events that we have to suffer through undoubtedly change the way we act and affect the choices we make. When we suffer a job loss or a sudden loss of wealth in a volatile market, or anything meaningful and tragic, it creates lasting memories that change the way we view things.

Worldwide pandemic scares that call for social distancing, or stay-at-home orders will most likely affect us long after the event has passed because we remember how we felt when the event happened.

No one knows for sure how things will change. Maybe we will save and invest differently. Maybe we will protect ourselves in ways that perhaps we never thought we would have to. Maybe we will wear bubble suits with oxygen tanks to go outside. We will see. Whatever it is, we will rise to the call and will still be the best nation in the world to live in.

42 | ForsythWoman.com

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May 2020 | 43

BY LISA S.T DOSS

The cultural knowledge of herbs is not entirely lost. Tea drinkers seek warmth through sips to find a remedy for the onset of an ailment or to relax. Once upon a time, herbal lore was instinctual, just like the hand wanders into a cupboard to find oregano written on a glass bottle. The basic knowledge of medicinal plants may still be in our genes, urging to take root and blossom. You, too, can appreciate the versatile quality of herbs by first loving plants, the colors or fragrance. Take it one step farther! The gardener in you can make teas, salves, tinctures and poultices to promote good health!

With 150 culinary varieties of basil from connections to cinnamon and lemon, sweet and spicy, it’s no wonder the Greek derivation of the word is “smell.” A lover of Caprese salad and flavorful pasta sauce has a keen sense of its distinctive scent and taste. You, unknowingly, benefit from vitamins A, C and K as well as manganese, iron, omega-3-fatty acids and calcium.

Medicinal chemicals in the leaves treat wounds, especially cuts and skin infections. Consuming the leaves in salads or teas help promote energy, relieve headaches, ease indigestion and treat insomnia. Despite all the benefits of basil, holy basil is known for its medicinal value.

WHAT IS HOLY BASIL?

Dating back 5,000 years in India, the reverent description of “holy” attributes to its promotion and protection for long life. The term “adaptogen” protects the body against physical, emotional and mental stress, such as soothing anxiety and mending the body.

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GROWING AND HARVESTING BASIL

As a woody, branching annual that thrives in the tropics, holy basil, fortunately, grows in zone 7; therefore, plant when the soil is warm and receives eight hours of direct southern exposure. A handy trick to encouraging leaf production is to pinch off the top branches when your plant reaches six-inches tall. And, eliminate blooms to prevent it from going to seed.

Tip: If you love holy basil, consider cutting a five-inch healthy stem and place it in water. Within a few days, roots and new leaves will form.

Tip: Allow excess leaves to dry and place in a sealable glass jar for future use!

Enticed by the desire to overwhelm your bed with favorite fruits, vegetables and herbs, it’s important to define the purpose to grow beyond the three plants.

With enough fresh leaves to serve a family of four, consider one of the following medicinal recipes:

A POULTICE

Grandma, as you may recall, mashed a handful of leaves with water, and placed the soft poultice on an insect bite or sting for, at least, 20 minutes. It relieved the pain, itching and reduced inflammation.

TEA

Pinch off a few leaves (depending on the desired strength) and cover with a cup of boiling water. Allow steeping for five minutes and strain before drinking. You can add lemon or honey to your tea. The result is to ease stress, energy and concentration levels.

You may even welcome social interaction.

Try adding dried leaves to hot milk to encourage sleep.

STEAM

When flu and a sinus cold reach their limits, inhaling the vapors from steam is a viable option. Boil two cups of water.

Add a tablespoon each of holy basil and peppermint tea. (Use the contents from a teabag if the dried form is not on hand.)

Essential oils work equally well. Inhale the steam in 10-minute increments.

Superstition may be just enough to surrender to this sacred herb. Just a leaf carried in your pocket offered protection during your travels. A pot of basil in your home or garden supposedly attracted wealth in many forms, possibly a long-term relationship, luck or revenue. Try planting holy basil this year to see if its magic works to improve your mind, body and spirit!

Next Month: The Rose

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Time to Do a Redesign

The goal of my company is to help people create a beautiful home where they can come to be loved, refreshed, and encouraged.

Home….a place where you and I have spent a great deal of time the past several weeks and probably will be for more weeks to come, since our state has a ‘stay at home’ order in place.

I am trying to stay busy and watch just enough news to keep me informed about the coronavirus. As I thought about my subject for this month’s article, I thought this would be a great time to help you do an interior redesign project in your home. While you are homebound, it might be fun to get the family involved.

What’s great is you will be using the best of what you have to create a different and beautiful interior…it will cost only effort and energy on your part…no money!

When it is finished, you will be pleased with your new space. There are ten steps to follow, so let’s get started: Just for fun, take ‘before’ pictures.

46 | ForsythWoman.com

Step #1 Assess the room and how you use it.

Step #2 Break down the room.

You will empty the room in reverse order of how you will put the items back in the room.

• Start with the small accessories (I lay an old towel on the dining table for these items). Then group the items as I place them on the table: all picture frames together, all collectibles, all books, etc.

• Remove all the artwork from the walls. If you can, prop the artwork in a room where you are not working.

• Remove large plants.

• Take all lamps out of the room.

• Remove tables and upholstered pieces. You may leave the larger pieces in the room (Furniture sliders are great tools when moving the larger pieces).

Step #3 Establish a focal point.

Do you have an architectural focal point like a fireplace or built-in bookcases? Or is the beautiful view out the picture window your focal point? What about that large piece of art that is special to you... could that be it? More than likely, you have a ‘real-life’ focal point, a larger than life TV. Establishing a focal point is important because you will place the furniture back in the room, keeping the focal point in mind.

Step #4 Evaluate the shape of the room. For furniture placement ideas check out: How to Arrange Furniture: No-Fail Tricks on bhg.com

Step #5 Shop your home and look for pieces of furniture that you could possibly use in your new space.

Step #6 Place the furniture.

If you need a rug for decorative reasons or to help define the space, now is the time to place it.

Step # 7 Bring large plants back into the space.

Step #8 Place the lamps.

Don’t forget to create a lighting triangle, as this will help distribute the light around the room.

Step #9 Hang the art.

Start with the focal wall and work your way around the room.

How To Hang Art Correctly-3 Simple Tips at studio-mcgee. com will help you with this.

Step #10 Add the accessories.

Start with the focal wall (if you have a mantle or built-ins), then proceed around the room.

Basic principles when placing accessories: • Work in odd numbers…. 1, 3, 5 (more than that tends to clutter the space).

• Vary height of accessories (in most cases, putting the tallest object on the left works best).

• Pay attention to size, shape, color, and texture.

• Use your accessories to tell a story.

• Use color three times or more as an accent.

Stand back and admire your work. Take a few ‘after’ pictures and just for fun, send to a friend along with the ‘befores.’

This is a challenging time for all of us.

Let’s use it to take a look at our lives, rekindle our gratitude, and be thankful.

Please know I am praying and trusting in God’s goodness and faithfulness for all of you.

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2. They want a fresh, designer look but haven’t been able to create it.

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7. They desire a home that feels good and looks good yet reflects who they are.

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I think I’m going to start this new routine in my life.

Wait…what if this isn’t the right routine? Here, let me look up a few more.

Oh…this other routine is so much better! Let me start this one.

But wait, I haven’t looked up this OTHER thing…let’s just take a minute to see what other people say about this.

And the cycle repeats until you realize…you wanted to do this days ago, and you still haven’t.

Overthinking is something I think we all can admit to – whether it affects your personal or professional life, we’ve all been there in a very paralyzing way, and getting out of it is one of the more difficult habits to break. Just like every habit you’d like to break, you not only need to stop doing the thing you want to get rid of, you also need to create something new to go in its place; otherwise, you’re going to end up with a new bad habit. Here are a few suggestions to start evicting overthinking:

START BY BEING AWARE

What are you overthinking? Is it all aspects of your life, or just a few? Are you overthinking just professional matters or personal ones, too? Awareness is the key to change – if you don’t know where the problems sit, take a few moments to reflect. If you find yourself overthinking something, stop, check-in, and write down some details about the situation.

Do this for a week or two, and then review the areas you find yourself overthinking.

FOCUS ON WHAT CAN GO RIGHT

One of the things that comes up the most for overthinkers is perfectionism. If it can’t be perfect, why bother? With that comes the concern about making sure things don’t go wrong – and being obsessed with things going wrong and all the ways they might go wrong. You can combat this by focusing on what can go right. Stop finding all the pitfalls and start paying attention to what might go right if whatever you’re overthinking happens.

48 | ForsythWoman.com

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

GIVE YOURSELF TIME

Yes, this is going to take some time and practice.

But treat your overthinking like a dairy product and give it an expiration date. Don’t worry about making sure your thinking is completely perfect. Worry about making sure you only allow so much time to overthink.

Let yourself indulge in that comfort of overthinking for a day, two days, a week – and then after that, make something happen and take action. On that same note, start to reduce the time you allow yourself to sit in that fretful place. Gradually reduce until you get to a place where you don’t feel the need to – but remember that you do need to give yourself the grace to not expect a change overnight.

KNOW THAT YOU CAN’T PREDICT THE FUTURE

One of the reasons people overthink, as mentioned earlier, is because people obsess about the things that might go wrong, and they obsess about this negative prediction. Repeat after me: you can’t predict the future.

If you think you can, you’re more than welcome to send me a lotto set for an upcoming jackpot, because I can think of a few ways to spend millions right now. All joking aside, this is probably one of the most powerful bits of advice – you can’t predict what’s going to happen, so why try? Why waste hours, days, weeks trying to get the “right” decision made, when you know in your heart that making a decision will be the best possible thing.

After you finally make that decision, take a breath, congratulate yourself, and make the next decision. A good friend told me you have to jump from one lily pad at a time, so remember, just make the next jump.

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May 2020 | 49

Do You Have

Impostor Syndrome?

BY DEBBIE BARR

* Kelly was promoted to the job of her dreams, but she constantly reminds herself that she’s not smart enough or talented enough to deserve it. * Bryan exceeded his sales quota for the year but he told himself it was just luck. * Keesha can’t stop comparing herself to the other leaders in her volunteer organization. She fears she will never be as good a speaker and as effective a leader as they are.

Kelly, Bryan, and Keesha aren’t actual people. But they represent millions of smart, talented, and successful people who feel like impostors—not really who others think they are, and unable to “own” their very real talents and accomplishments. In their own eyes, they’re always falling short of what they should be, which renders them unable to take credit for their successes or enjoy them. But almost always, the truth is, whenever a “Kelly” gets promoted, it’s because she deserves it; whenever a “Bryan” exceeds his sales quota, it is because of his hard work; and whenever a “Keesha” is brought onto a team, it is because of her potential to become as good a speaker and as effective a leader as anyone else in the organization.

If you identify with Kelly, Bryan, or Keesha, you’re hardly alone. It has been estimated that 70% of us experience Impostor Syndrome at some point in our lives. No category of people is exempt. Men, women, physicians, actors, executives, minorities, parents, and even international students who come to the US to study can all sometimes feel like impostors.

Some people succumb to Impostor Syndrome because of the false belief that they need to be perfect to be lovable. Others feel they must have given the impression that they are more capable than they really are. Still others have internalized a racial or gender stereotype about intelligence or competence, for example, women in STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) occupations. Whatever the root cause, people with Impostor Syndrome worry that others will find out how little they really know, or expose them as a fraud—someone whose accomplishments are due to luck, rather than genuine talent, hard work, and intelligence.

Clearly, Impostor Syndrome is a real thing and not all that uncommon. But what’s the cure?

Experts on Impostor Syndrome offer these suggestions: 1. Pay attention to your thoughts and call yourself out whenever you start thinking you’re an impostor. Ask yourself if your thoughts are helping you or hindering you.

Dr. Gail Gazelle, who coaches physicians dealing with Impostor Syndrome, notes, “This process of paying attention begins to create an important distance between you and these thoughts.” She also suggests asking yourself three questions: • How do I know that the thought that I’m an imposter is true?

• What am I magnifying?

• What am I minimizing?

2. Talk about your fears with safe friends, a counselor or psychologist, or a trusted mentor. Valerie Young, an Impostor Syndrome expert, told Time Magazine, “People who have more experience can reassure you that what you’re feeling is normal, and knowing others have been in your position can make it seem less scary.”

3. People often feel like impostors when they are not facing their challenges in the right way. Focus on your strengths, embrace constructive criticism, and remember that the more you practice a skill, the better you will get at it. This approach, more humble than fearful, will help you defeat impostor beliefs.

Sources: Gail Gazelle, MD, “How overcoming the imposter syndrome decreases physician burnout,” Becker’s Hospital Review, Friday, December 6, 2019. (beckershospitalreview.com); Abigail Abrams, “Yes, Impostor Syndrome is Real. Here’s How to Deal with it,” (Time.com), June 20, 2018.

50 | ForsythWoman.com

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May 2020 | 51

Interrupt

BY JEN O LE

NICZAK

BROWN

I get it – You get SO excited you just have to jump in with your amazing idea or interjection. You didn’t mean to step on their sentence, you just got so excited!

Or maybe the person you’re talking to is confused, and your clarification can help.

You honestly thought they were done during that pause, and when you spoke up you didn’t notice that look on their face.

Perhaps you just wanted to get your point out because the person you were talking to just isn’t getting there fast enough, and you have a meeting to go to!

Things to do! Emails to write!

Regardless of the reason, interruptions are an issue for a lot of people, and one within your control. Working to fix it isn’t easy, but like any bad habit, the best way to replace it is by actively replacing it with a good habit. Here are three ways to stop interrupting so much:

LISTEN TO THE LAST WORD

This is part of an improv activity that I think everyone needs to do immediately with another person – and it’s wildly successful for ending interruptions. It can be done in a small group as well: you start with one person saying a sentence. This can be about anything at all. Maybe it’s something simple like: I have a lot of plants.

After that person finishes her whole sentence – as long or as short as it may be, the second person responds, using the last word of that previous sentence as the first word of the next sentence. It might sound like: Plants are great to have in the house.

The response might be something like: House pets should stay away from plants.

And so on. As funny as this activity gets, it’s a brilliant way to get folks to wait until the end of the sentence before they respond. They have to listen to that last word – digest it – and then think of their response. While doing this in real life might end in some funny moments, you can use the principle: listen for that last word and then let it inspire your response. This will start to slow down your thinking and make you consciously listen to the person you’re talking to.

52 | ForsythWoman.com

Much?

BREATHE AND LOOK FOR A QUESTION

While you’re listening to someone, looking for a curiosity question is a great way to curb interruptions. Often we interrupt to interject – instead of adding information to the conversation, why not get the other person to give more information? This isn’t a way to make them feel on the spot or as if they are being interrogated; rather it’s a way to find out more instead of interjecting your information.

This works well by being conscious of your breathing. Don’t just jump on the first question you think of – let yourself have some time to think and pick the question you’re actually curious about. This also works well for folks who like to chime in with their interjections and own experiences. You’re taking some time and letting the other person have the spotlight.

GET COMFY IN SILENCE

Oh, silence – that momentary panic for so many people!

Repeat after me: Silences are good things.

Silences mean people are thinking. Think in the silence.

Too many people think silences mean people are losing their place, not paying attention, being awkward when, in reality, silences are times when people are thinking and processing! Let yourself allow the silence in a conversation – that silence is going to lead to more thoughtful conversations and eliminate the race that happens when both people are eagerly sharing their information.

While interrupting might be a difficult habit to break at first – the new replacement habits are excellent.

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WomanCare

May 2020 | 53

We all have times in our lives where we have to be generous with the love that we give to others. Whether it’s in our role as a mother, sister, wife, daughter, or even as a friend, there are times when the love we can give is vital to the health and well-being of the people that we care about deeply. These are important times we need to be prepared for. However, if we’re going to be able to give the love we have to others, we need to understand how to love ourselves first. If we’re unable to do that, we will be unable to give our love at those important times when the people we care about need it the most.

So how can we practice loving ourselves every day? Even though we all know it is really important, it is often something that gets pushed to the side when we are busy or overwhelmed. Here are some ways to show yourself love every day so that you can be prepared to give your love, too.

BY JULIE FRITZ

GET ENOUGH SLEEP

Sleep is so important. Without it, it can be hard to feel clear-minded and able to make good decisions. It also takes a toll on us emotionally and physically when we are not getting the sleep we need. It’s important to aim for 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night so that you can feel your best and do your best. Don’t forget that self-care is an important part of loving yourself.

EAT HEALTHY

Making healthy choices with food gives us the energy and nutrients we need to be our best selves. It’s another great way to show yourself love. By reminding your body that you care enough to make the right decisions about what you put into it, you will feel better about your health and love yourself more.

EXERCISE

Thirty minutes of exercise every day goes a really long way. It’s an excellent way to show yourself love by reminding your body that you care for it – enough to make sure it stays strong and healthy. When you make exercise a part of your routine, you will notice a difference in how you feel and how you feel about yourself.

TAKE TIME OUT FOR YOU

Show yourself some love by taking some time out to enjoy yourself.

Do something you enjoy or do nothing at all. Find a way to feel relaxed and focus on you. Whatever it is, allow it to be a time of rest and healing where you are growing the love you have for yourself.

STAY EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY

This is really important. We all need to pay close attention to our emotional health. It is not something that can be ignored. It can get out of control quickly if you are not paying attention.

If you’re not feeling well emotionally, it can drain you in so many ways. It can leave you feeling empty inside and not allow you to give love to anyone, including yourself. Be sure to talk to someone if you’re not feeling well emotionally.

TAKE 10 MIN EVERY MORNING TO LOVE YOUR LOOK

One really easy way to show yourself some love is to take 10 minutes every morning to make sure that you feel beautiful. Maybe that means styling your hair or putting on a little makeup or picking out an outfit that makes you feel good. There is something really special about how you feel when you are loving your look.

Whatever it takes to make you feel that way, take the time to do that every day. You are worth it.

When you are making sure that you are loving yourself first, you’re putting yourself in the best position possible to love others as well. We all have a sense of wanting to give love to others, to be there when they need us, and help them when times are tough. It’s always hard to be your best for others and to love them most if you can’t love yourself first. Take the time to show yourself the love you deserve so you can help others, too.

54 | ForsythWoman.com

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Spring Cleaning Hacks from the Experts

BY ELISA WALLACE COPPEDE

While the COVID-19 crisis may seem somewhat in the rearview mirror for some, for many, the fear this pandemic ignited is still very freshly imprinted on their minds. And with the spring season upon us, it is absolutely time to do a thorough cleaning of your home. There are those who highly enjoy “Spring Cleaning,” as it can be an excellent method to purge some household items that no longer are needed. However, for many, this task can seem incredibly daunting and impossible to accomplish—especially considering that nights/weekends are usually booked with family and friend events. Do you feel dread about the upcoming “cleaning season”? Want some tricks and tips to help knock out the biggest cleaning assignments? Read on for eight simple cleaning hacks sure to get even those who avoid cleaning, up and moving.

CLEANING HACK #1

Make a schedule! Yes, treat “cleaning” as a true job, and make time for it.

The first step will be to scope out each room in the house. Then one, by one, make a list of what assignments need to be completed. Put on the calendar which task is scheduled for completion. Spring cleaning will be finished in no time!

CLEANING HACK #2

Tackle from the inside out. One of the biggest cleaning challenges is cabinets/ drawers. These seem to be where everything is shoved during busy times. As you go through each room, make sure to keep cabinets/drawers on the top of the list. This is the time to declutter and throw out, donate or sell any unwanted / not needed items.

This big task will help make other jobs streamlined.

CLEANING HACK #3

Look up, then down. Don’t forget the corners of the rooms! These are easy spots for dust, cobwebs, and critters to hide. Break out the vacuum and begin sucking up all dirt and dust. Then move to the lower floorboards and carpet.

CLEANING HACK #4

Let the sun show you the mess. Wait for an overcast day, and let the sunlight show you the streaks on windows. Now is the time to clean them thoroughly.

Do not forget to open them and vacuum out the dust/dirt inside the windows. This is easily one of the dirtiest, yet most forgotten, areas!

CLEANING HACK #5

Don’t just wipe down kitchen counters.

There are so many areas in a kitchen that get overlooked that are dying to be cleaned. Do not forget to clean out the inside of highly used kitchen appliances—like the microwave (especially under the tray), oven, fridge, and coffee maker. Another item to consider scrubbing is cutting boards.

Think a spot is permanent? Scrub the cut side of a lemon over the board to remove food stains and smells. Want extra cleaning oomph? Sprinkle it with salt or baking soda beforehand!

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CLEANING HACK #6

Go green to clean! It is important to consider what your “Spring Cleaning” is doing to our environment.

Remember to use items that are ensured to not release toxins into the environment. This is especially important if you have little ones, pets, or elderly family members living in the house. Consider investing in a steam cleaner.

It can be used to clean your microwave, tile, hardwood floors, kitchen appliances, and bathrooms. Since steam cleaners only use hot water vapor, they are 100% natural and chemical-free.

CLEANING HACK #7

Don’t forget about the air. One of the most commonly overlooked cleaning tasks is changing one’s air filters.

It is important to keep in mind that not all air filters are created equal. As a matter of fact, replacing a standard filter with a more robust one with a high MERV rating will help keep the family healthier as they enter spring.

CLEANING HACK #8

End with the bottom. The last task to consider is how to clean floors. If working with hardwoods, consider only wet-cleaning them once every one to two months with Bona Hardwood Floor Cleaner Spray, and spot-clean as needed. Then make sure to place trivets or saucers under plants to avoid water damage and use furniture protectors to avoid scratches. If working with carpets or rugs, consider hiring a professional steam cleaning company. Many will pick up and return rugs for a reasonable price, while others provide onsite cleaning.

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What Running a Communication Company Taught Me About Company Culture

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN For the past almost eight years, I’ve been working with companies on their communication skills. From presentation prep to giving feedback to interpersonal communication, my job has never been boring – it’s a new challenge every single workshop we do because of the spectrum of people and businesses I get to work with. From newly formed startup to Fortune 100 companies, there are some trends regarding company culture that cross all boundaries. Here are the four standouts:

COMMUNICATION STARTS AT THE TOP

I can’t express this enough. We get called in for two major things: everything is wonderful and we want to do even better with all the things going on!

Or… Everything is terrible and in upheaval and we need help. Very few incidents are “inbetween” with this. In both situations, we advise that communication, specifically good communication skills, has to start at the top.

If supervisors aren’t practicing active listening, clear communication, good feedback, and creating a failure-free space for people to talk, there’s going to be a lot of problems that won’t get “fixed” with a learning and development program or a teambuilding event. Full stop – even the “let’s do better” crowd needs clear communication from the top of the ladder.

DON’T ASK IF YOU WON’T

If a supervisor won’t do something, you better believe the team won’t. The healthiest cultures are those that have an “all hands” mentality – if there is something you’re asking an employee to do, and a supervisor refuses to do it as well, you’re going to have a hard time getting buy-in – at all. Here’s an example: we had a workshop on active listening for a financial firm. It was a three-hour workshop focused on building skills as well an action plan to continue learning – and none of the supervisors thought they needed the workshop, and flat out refused to participate. That’s not saying that you have to

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have everyone in on a workshop at the same time – these supervisors were in the room, and just refused to participate. One guess on how the team felt about that, and if it bled into the rest of the work environment.

FIX PROBLEMS BEFORE THEY ARE PROBLEMS

Companies know when some things will be a problem. They just do – it’s usually the little things that are written off as an annoyance – one of those pesky things that “will just go away” or “will get better with time” or “maybe it’s just growing pains.” It is, in fact, none of those things. It’s not growing pains, or getting better with time or something that will go away – and it will grow into a full-fledged problem unless you take the time to think about it and fix it.

Those little pre-problems? Those will become problems, and you’ll save yourself a lot of heartache and stress if you take some time out and just fix them when they are small and fixable, instead of waiting until they are out of control.

SOMETIMES IT IS THE PERSON

You know how people like to say it isn’t you, it’s me? Well, sometimes it is YOU – and not the you that is reading this. Aside from happy moments and moments of great upheaval, oftentimes we get asked to come in when things are not so great with one particular individual. It’s usually someone who is high performing and just doesn’t know how to human. It’s often very stressful because the person is “great at sales” or “really nice” or something equally as frustrating when they are also awful to everyone around them.

Sometimes, it’s not fixable – you can’t get someone to change unless they want to change.

And if they don’t want to change? You’re wasting time and money.

These are only a few things I’ve learned about company culture over the last eight years – I thankfully can’t imagine what I’m going to learn for the next eight!

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May 2020 | 59

A Farmer’s Tale: Terri Petruzzi

BY DAVID WILLARD

It’s an interesting detail that in 1850 the U.S. population was sitting at 23.2 million. During that same time, there were 1.4 million working farms in the United States. In 1940, the population in the U.S. grew to 131.8 million people, and the number of active farms had increased to 6.1 million farms. Today, the U.S. population sits at about 329 million. However, the number of active farms sits at approximately two million.

Bottom line, farming as an industry and as a livelihood is certainly not a first choice for individuals for life and career paths that it used to be. Hard work and dedication may not be the road to success in farming.

Therefore, it takes something else to choose this lifestyle and career path. It takes a love of farming…in its truest form. It is in this knowledge that the farmers markets of today show their true heart and shine. Farmers markets, with vendors aplenty from small farms across the area, bring not only great, fresh produce and other products, but also stories of those who love what they do.

This month’s Famers Tales is spotlighting Truzzi’s Bath and Body, located in Stokesdale, NC. However, they make their farmers market home at The Triad Farmers Market.

“I got involved with horses when our children were young, which led to our desire to have a homestead farm. We raise our own food and keep livestock in a rotational grazing method, where everything has to ‘earn its keep.’ We’ve raised pigs, turkeys, chickens, and guineas. We originally had horses and cows on our very hilly property, but sought animals with a smaller footprint, and we settled on goats and sheep. We definitely seek to leave the land better than we found it,” says Terri Petruzzi, owner of Truzzi’s Bath & Body.

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“In keeping with every animal needing to earn its keep, our dairy goats help to keep woodland brush and weeds down while providing milk for us, which we use raw or make cheese and soap and lotions,” she continues.

Terri Petruzzi started her business in 2009, as a result of wanting to combine her “love of science with her love of using what God has given us in creation.”

Today, her products include goat’s milk, local wild-harvested honey, essential oils, and healing botanicals.

“The farmers market is a perfect venue to meet customers directly and gives the opportunity to answer questions about our product, its ingredients, and the farm. It’s something you don’t really get at a local store or department store or online shop,” she adds.

“At a farmers market, you naturally find similar products sold by different farms – tomatoes, for example. But each individual farm may have a different way of growing which gives it its flavor or longevity. Same with soap. Not all soap is created equal. We each have our own formula which contributes to its cleansing and moisturizing factors, creativity with fragrance and eye appeal, and how long the bar lasts,” she further comments.

“I am a daughter, wife, mom, grandmother who enjoys life, my Lord, my family, animals, and working with my hands,” Petruzzi concludes. This is who Terri Petruzzi is, and this is her farming story. It is unique, and it is important because it has brought her to our community and to one of our farmers markets, adding to the tapestry of vendors and farmers who bring us even more farmers’ tales in months to come.

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May 2020 | 61

PMDD It’s not just PMS

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

*Content Warning: Suicidal thoughts, self-harm

thinking about it. I wasn’t crazy. I had something very real.

Please note, I am not a medical professional. Just a person who struggled way too long with something that isn’t talked about enough.

The next few weeks brought me talking to my doctor, getting diagnosed with PMDD and serious depression – the latter brought on by my fear of living every single month with the rollercoaster. Getting on an antidepressant that probably saved my life, but then gave me aphasia, a condition where you forget simple words and phrases. Therapy, ultimately, got me off medication and back into a state where I could manage the one to two days a month that are just…bad.

I remember the exact moment when I Google diagnosed myself.

I had just wrapped one of my emotional roller coasters – I went from rage to paranoia, to severe sadness, all in a matter of just a few minutes. I couldn’t breathe with anxiety, and I was lying on my couch, thinking about how much better everything would be if I just weren’t part of the world anymore.

Who was going to miss me? All I did was overcomplicate everything. During this particular rollercoaster, I screamed at my husband, tried to hurt myself and when he stopped me, sobbed for an hour.

Typing “crazy before my period” led me to a Self Magazine article where women talked about their experiences with premenstrual dysphoric disorder or PMDD. I read the first, second, tenth, fifteenth – they all could have been written by me. I sent the article to my husband with a “Please read this NOW” text – and he said, “Oh my god, this is you.” Stories that echoed the week before my period perfectly – so much so that I was sobbing again

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The most unsettling part? The more people I talked to, the more I realized that quite a few people have PMDD, between 3-8% of the population of people that have periods, have PMDD. And quite a few people think it’s “just bad PMS.” It’s not.

PMDD symptoms are both severe and debilitating because they are both physical and psychological – and happen every single month, in the week before a period. Symptoms include severe fatigue, mood changes like irritability, nervousness, and depression, crying and emotional sensitivity, difficulty concentrating, heart palpitations, paranoia, coordination difficulties, forgetfulness, bloating, headaches, backaches, muscle spasms, hot flashes, dizziness,

fainting, sleeplessness, vision changes, respiratory issues, easy bruising and heightened sensitivity. Oh, and what’s more fun? There’s no clear cause.

The good news, PMDD is getting more recognition. When I was first diagnosed, people told me “Oh, it’s just a bad period!” The number of people that said, “Oh, use a heating pad!” or “Oh yeah, I was super sad during my period this month, too” made me want to scream. It’s not just being super sad. It’s not just having a tough night. It’s sometimes a third of your MONTH, every month, and you know it’s coming, but you can literally do nothing to stop it. The other twothirds of your month you spend picking up the pieces, taping your life back together – and then terrified for what is coming.

Between the recognition and people discussing their experiences, and people like you reading about them, we can normalize this very scary thing. I’ve been diagnosed for over two years and while it’s still there, I’m no longer on an antidepressant – it just didn’t work for me – and I am seeing my therapist every other month. I take supplements, I exercise and eat well – and probably the most important of all – I give myself grace every month because I know I might experience anxiety that when pushed, can turn into the beast that turned my life around for years.

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May 2020 | 63

With spring we get blooming flowers, rising temperatures and, if you’re like me, a desire to break away from the heavy winter comfort foods. The prosciutto and peas bring flavors that are fresh, light but still creamy and rich.

INGREDIENTS 1 pound of fettucine Olive oil Salt and pepper ¼ pound of prosciutto, sliced into ¼ inch ribbons (bacon works great, too!)

1 medium yellow onion, diced small 2 cups mushrooms, sliced 3 cloves garlic, minced 1 cup heavy cream ½ cup pasta water 1 cup frozen peas ½ cup grated parmesan

DIRECTIONS Roast the chicken by placing it on a baking sheet and roasting at 425 degrees for 20-25 minutes, or until cooked through. Let sit and chop into thin slices. Meanwhile, boil salted water for pasta.

Cook prosciutto in a large sauté pan until crispy, then remove from the pan and set aside. In the same pan, add two tablespoons olive oil, mushrooms, onion and garlic. Cook for 5 minutes until tender. Add pasta to boiling water and cook for 6-8 minutes until almost tender. Reserve ½ cup of pasta water to use in the sauce – set aside.

Add 1 cup heavy cream and ½ cup of the reserved pasta water. Simmer on medium until it thickens.

Add the prosciutto back in along with sliced chicken, peas and parmesan cheese.

Serve immediately.

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Spring Pasta with Prosciutto, Peas, Chicken & Mushrooms

BY SARA WILES

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GETTING CULTURED with Fermented Foods & Beverages

Imagine having 100 trillion helpful friends! That’s how many beneficial bacteria and microorganisms you have lining your gut and warding off illnesses with probiotic benefits that pack a punch in the health department. You can help avoid colds and the flu by amping up on fermented foods and beverages – even a spoonful with a meal can help boost your immune system.

The process of fermentation uses microbes like bacteria and yeast to preserve foods. Long before the days of the refrigerator, people used fermentation to keep their foods fresher longer. It’s a process many of our ancestors used in their diets - not just in one culture or country, but globally.

Sauerkraut too sour for you? How about trying other fermented vegetables or kimchi? Kombucha, a fermented tea, has become a popular trend among the health-conscious.

Add a little fermented foods and beverages to your meal routine and reap the benefits!

HEALTH BENEFITS OF THE FERMENTED

Fermented foods and beverages can help with digestion and absorption of nutrients that our bodies use to stay healthy. Bad bacteria can wreak havoc on our health and cause bloating, diarrhea, or constipation. We need lots of good bacteria to counteract the bad and balance our gut.

Fermentation can make your immune system stronger, healthier, and more robust by supporting the gut lining and improving inflammation.

Fermented foods and beverages are anti-viral and anti-fungal. They are even supportive in detoxing from heavy metals.

Feel better and think better! Not just for healthier and happier bodies, but for healthier and happier minds, too, since fermented foods and beverages are believed to have an effect on serotonin, a neurotransmitter involved in mood.

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RED SAUERKRAUT

A cool thing about fermented food is how simple it is to make your own! For instance, the only requirements for homemade sauerkraut are a mason jar, salt and, the star of the show, cabbage.

You can use cabbage of your choice to make your own sauerkraut, but I personally prefer to use red cabbage. Not only does it turn a pretty pink color, but it also tastes incredible and is a perfect complement atop a bowl of chili, hot dogs, brats/ sausage, or in a Reuben. Experiment with different types of cabbage and find your fav.

Ingredients:

• 1 medium head of cabbage (red, green or Napa) • 1 ½ Tablespoons sea or kosher salt • You will also need a cutting board, sharp knife, wooden spoon, mixing bowl, 2-quart wide-mouth canning jar and something to cover the jar such as cheesecloth, a paper coffee filter or paper towel.

Instructions:

1. Make sure everything is clean and dry. Wash your hands and the cabbage well. We want to multiply good bacteria – not bad bacteria.

2. Slice the cabbage into ribbons, diced as finely as you like 3. Add the chopped cabbage to a mixing bowl, then sprinkle in the salt 4. Next, mash the salt into the cabbage with your fist until cabbage is watery and limp, approximately 10 minutes. It’s a great way to release pent up stress!

5. Pack cabbage down into the mason jar. Add water as needed so cabbage is submerged.

6. Cover jar and secure with a rubber band or twine.

7. Over the next 3 to 10 days, do a daily check to be sure cabbage is submerged. If not, push it down and add more water if needed.

After 3 days, do a taste test. The fermentation process will take 3 to 10 days, depending on the temperature in the room and your taste preferences. Bubbles at the top are signs of good, natural fermentation. Don’t panic if there’s some white film at the top of the ferment. That’s kahm yeast, not mold. Just skim it off - it won’t harm you or your sauerkraut. When ready, refrigerate where it can be stored for two months. Enjoy!

Recipe adapted from thekitchn.com/ how-to-make-homemade-sauerkraut-in-a-mason-jar-193124

Easy to make and a healthy addition to your daily diet, fermented foods and beverages should become a part of your life. Enjoy! Your health will benefit!

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

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BY TARYN JEREZ OF ONECRAFTYMISS.COM

5 Things You Can Do to Grow Your Business (That have Nothing To Do With Sales!)

This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

Feeling a semblance of control when it comes to growing your business can make all the difference.

In this season we’ve been in, that feeling may have been in short supply.

Let’s be honest, some of us have had an unfair amount of change and new things added to our already full plate in the last few months and spending limited time on business is the reality. For those who have been juggling working from home, running their side hustle, homeschooling kids, cooking and cleaning, doomsday prepping, and what have you this month’s article is for you!

While sales are such an important part of every small business, it’s important to remember that there are many small things you can do to make a difference outside of just selling your goods and services. Here are five things that take minimal time, money, and effort that you can put in place during this season and make an impact.

CHECK-IN WITH YOUR HUSTLE DURING THIS TIME Take some time to ask yourself how things are going in your business and how you are feeling. How is your business set up for this season? Has it been able to support you? Are your products and services diverse enough to allow for virtual offerings? These can help you make some tweaks that you may not have thought about previously in the year. Don’t forget to check in on yourself as well and think about how your business feels right now. Are you finding it difficult to breathe and stay calm running things? Do you have the energy for your business, or are you distracted or unmotivated? Are you feeling more creative than ever before? Think about your answers and help make guided decisions as you approach this next season.

ORGANIZE ALL THE THINGS & PREPARE FOR WHAT’S NEXT Doing little things like choosing to set aside small increments of time to get organized can make you not only feel more in control but add up to make a big impact! Start with physical organization and attack things like your desk, old receipts, office supplies, notebooks, and organizers.

Next, get Virtually organized by spending some designating time to clean out your inbox, update client records, file contracts, and invoices, update Quickbooks, dropbox, and google drive. Last but not least, is getting mentally organized! Think about your plans for the future, such as marketing campaigns, event schedules, new goals, product or service launches, and more.

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COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR CUSTOMERS & AUDIENCE If ever there was a time to show up a brand, it’s NOW! Even when it can feel a little difficult to be present on social media or in your email list, your customers are there and want to hear from you. Just show up authentically and don’t be afraid to be real and be you. Lean into how you are feeling and the things that you’re looking forward to in your business or in this season most. If you are concentrating on selling currently, that’s great - talk about it! If you are stepping back to concentrate on what’s next, that’s also great - talk about it. Utilize time to create email marketing campaigns, social media posts, send happy mail to clients or previous customers. Take some time to communicate and keep building and nurturing relationships.

REEVALUATE YOUR PRODUCT & PRICING STRATEGY Explore your current offerings, such as your product inventory and services. This is one of the best things you can do during off times in your business! What have been your best sellers and worst sellers?

Make some changes accordingly to benefit your inventory and sales. Have you done any market research to validate what you sell, such as taking a poll or survey? There may be new findings based on what your audience has to say! Consider looking at your business through a new lens and think about new ways you can offer something, such as creating packages where you sell different things together in a higher value or more attractive way.

BRAIN DUMP EXERCISES

If you’re unfamiliar with a brain dump exercise, this is some of the greatest 10 to 15 minutes you can spend in your day. Low time commitment with big impact makes for a great mix! Grab a pen and paper or open up a blank word document and give yourself time to just brainstorm and dump all your ideas out in front of you. You can think of a specific topic and let yourself go to town pouring out ideas. Is there a product or service you’ve been thinking about launching? Has a rebrand been on your list for a while? Are you trying to name your business or an offer you have?

Remove any rules and let ideas flow, and you’ll be amazed at what you can discover in those exercises.

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May 2020 | 71

Get Out Of Your Thinking Rut with Improv

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

ally have time to noon, and you fin It’s a lovely after ct. You’ve got s on your big proje cu fo d an wn do sit power through so you can really a snack prepped oice, and a ch of rk, a beverage some of this wo s. cu fo n ca u e yo comfy spot wher kind of crunchy usually got some In my case, I’ve far away from my I’m d an a, te ha or snack, a kombuc I’m going to ow kn because you dogs and plants, her. d check on anot play with one an brain block, come get through that Finally! You can and interesting. actually creative up with something Let’s go! wn.

Writes an idea do r.

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mething en you think of so Worse - even wh is ing th ” nt re iffe different, that “d y just a cousin or somehow basicall get out ing you couldn’t th ancestor of the ! ce pla st e fir of your head in th e idea like rolling this on If you don’t feel tired so t ge u ad until yo through your he ain off br ur yo ut sh or it of it you just do art of improv can tap into the completely, you ny people t of it. While ma to get yourself ou is it Anyway?” e Lin se ho with “W associate improv listening o int king about taps the improv I’m tal u – which yo d un aro rld to the wo and responding that gets used me kind of improv sa e th y all tu ac is Here are three el. lev d te va an ele on stage, just on t: eaking this ru improv tips for br

AN OPTION prov, in my FAILURE ISN’T im beautiful parts of

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STREAM OF CO what you’re wo wn do

Still stuck? Write thing you think of ite down the first Right under it, wr nt. Now under me te ur previous sta at when you read yo en wh you read th that you think of that, something : For example next statement. r. at to eat for dinne I need to know wh lly fun. rea e ar es nk: Recip This makes me thi d my rea n’t nk: Oh, I have This makes me thi . ely lat g favorite food blo t easy rice bowl nk: Remember tha t that.

This makes me thi ou s ago? I sh ld ea I made a few month u’re following a is really simple, yo e While this example ng on breaking th usness and worki e letting yourself u’r stream of conscio yo – as ide e two or thre lated loop of the first bit hole in a calcu head down a rab to e ac gr e th ve ha manner.

One of the most You’re taught to doesn’t happen. opinion – failure the thing that e rsu pu at is, you follow the fear; th fear, you’re at th st. By chasing scares you the mo ing different – th me so , ge an th, ch looking into grow n break your rut. all things that ca impossible pull about failure as How does thinking convinced that e u’r Well, when yo you out of a rut? wrong, you avoid and choices are certain solutions th the idea that wi brainstorming making them. By as are possible, bly fail, and all ide you cannot possi p you’re in. loo e th of urself out you’re pulling yo

72 | ForsythWoman.com

YES, AND

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May 2020 | 73

And yet, she and I were more like oil and water than a perfect blend, our loving motherdaughter relationship, hardwon. Knowing this, we both did the work of understanding, healing, and moving forward together before it was too late.

When Alzheimer’s came in hot pursuit of Caroline’s mind, she would not allow it to rob her spirit. She had things to say and more love to share. I can’t count how many times she would lean in, look me in the eye and say, “You’ll see, Jeannie.

Getting older is beautiful…you get the wisdom.”

Caroline’s Wisdom

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

While different in temperament and personality, my mother, Caroline, and I shared a love of birds, flowers, and surprisingly, words. Growing up in an urban environment, our birds were of the scrappy varieties, mostly sparrows and pigeons who managed to get by just like the rest of us. On these beautiful spring mornings, as I spread a bountiful buffet for my house finches and mockingbirds, I flash back to my mother spreading out our Wonder or Sunbeam white bread crusts on the overhang of our second-floor porch. “Mom, why are you feeding the pigeons?

They’re ugly and they make a mess everywhere. It’s gross.” Her simple response was, “They are God’s creatures, too.” Well, there was no arguing with that.

It wasn’t just the birds who benefited from my mother’s generous heart. The youngest of nine children, Caroline always found a way to give, even when she had so little. “If you find any pennies on the way to school, save them for the poor box on Sunday.” We’d roll our eyes and one of us would respond, “Mom, WE’RE poor.”

Of course, having none of that, she’d put a speedy end to the conversation with, “There is always someone poorer than us.”

Caroline applied that perspective to both material and spiritual matters, for the simple reason that she saw abundance in everything, especially people. Keenly attuned to the human spirit, she didn’t need a course in emotional intelligence, a personality test, or a knowledge of neuroscience to inform how she related with others. Interested in what made each person tick, people relaxed around her as their protective masks and worldweary personas softened. Caroline had a way of making everyone feel special, and worthy of the space they took up. It wasn’t a goal she worked on; it was simply how she was. Even our teenage friends responded to her warmth, her unconditional kindness, and her playful curiosity. Our humble apartment became a refuge of sorts, a haven for animals and humans who had temporarily lost their way or simply needed to feel accepted and loved.

Over time, I began to recognize and appreciate that Caroline was uniquely gifted as a person who lived her life with a heart wide open. A devout Catholic, she had a waiting list of Orthodox Jewish families who wanted her to be their children’s au pair. She was as fastidious of the traditions in those Orthodox homes as she was of her own commitment to saying her daily rosary.

74 | ForsythWoman.com

She never uttered those words in that preachy, “I know better” way. She spoke them like someone unexpectantly privy to an inside tip, one she needed to pass on to give me the strength to trust in tomorrow, and to respect the inscrutable mystery that is the process of living and maturing.

Eventually, I did see. I came to understand that “the wisdom” was nothing shy of a proper noun: The Wisdom.

For me, it is a gift worthy of reverence. I am exceedingly aware of four specific things I learned from my mother’s ripened wisdom: • The “situation” doesn’t define you. You choose who and how you will be.

• People will always matter more than anything else.

• You can learn something from every person you meet – and it isn’t necessarily good.

• Listen to your intuition. Trust that which knows better than you do.

It is easy for me to imagine how Caroline would respond to the pandemic that continues to test all of us in ways practical and spiritual. She would choose to be positive, a light for others. She would spread kindness. And she would tap her Depression-era roots to embrace the trust that we will get through this stronger, wiser, and more loving.

I am so very grateful for my mother, my first teacher, my most profound example of what it means to live with a heart wide open. As for the wisdom? I trust that I am living into it, and when the moment presents itself, sharing the gift.

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May 2020 | 75

Spicy Food Lovers Spic icy, Spicier & Spiciest

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

SPICY BITES AND SIPS

Got a thing for the spicy? Craving capsaicin?

(That’s the chemical responsible for the spicy sensation in a pepper.) Time to turn up the heat!

SPICY = HEALTHY!

Spicy food doesn’t have to be a guilty pleasure.

There are health benefits! A study by Harvard School of Public Health found that eating spicy foods even just once a day for a week can increase your longevity. In addition to boosting your metabolism with the spicy, you can also slow down your appetite. If you’re working on losing or maintaining your weight, spicy is the way to go. Studies reveal that capsaicin can reduce the hunger hormone, ghrelin, to help people feel fuller and eat less. If you’re trying to burn calories, give cayenne pepper a try.

Cayenne peppers, related to bell peppers and jalapenos, are members of the chili family and have lots of health benefits, so be bold. Go hot!

The hotter the pepper, the more capsaicin it contains, which is the compound that gives the peppers their medicinal properties.

Although too much of the spicy can sometimes upset your stomach, surprisingly, spicy food can actually aid digestion via active compounds that help avoid developing stomach ulcers. Cayenne pepper may help the stomach’s defense against infections, increase digestive fluid production, and support the delivery of enzymes to the stomach, which in turn improves digestion.

Some wince at how numb their mouth and tongue get when they ingest something spicy.

Sometimes it feels like being on fire, but that same fire provides another health benefit of the spicy - pain relief. When applied topically to the skin, capsaicin has the potential to reduce pain by temporarily changing the way the brain processes pain. Whether in the form of cream, lotion, gel, or transdermal skin patch, capsaicin is frequently rubbed into the skin to improve pain in the lower back, joints, and muscles.

76 | ForsythWoman.com

Here are some spicy dishes from around the world that you will want to try: Phaal Curry, Vindaloo, Chicken Paprikash, Jerk Chicken, Tom Yum, Shrimp Creole, Papa a la Huancaina, Sichuan Hot Pot, Kimchi-jjigae, Sik Wat, Francheesie, Spicy Southwest Salad.

Spicy dishes from tourradar.com/days-to-come/ list-of-every-spicy-food/ But the spicy is not just for food! Sip these hot ‘n spicy beverages: Mangonada. Habanero Ginger Beergarita, Bloody Mary, Jalapeno Beer, Jalapeno Margarita, Jalapeno Peach Martini, The Michelada, The Gallagher, Tropical Heat Mojito, Coconut Chili Mojito, Cilantro Sunrise, and Serrano-Spiced Paloma Cocktail.

Spicy beverages from delish.com/cooking/g1481/ spicy-cocktail-recipes/

HOT OR NOT? Need to know just how spicy that serrano pepper is compared to a habanero pepper?

Check out the Scoville Scale, the standard measurement of spicy chemicals in food that reveals the pungency (spiciness or heat) of peppers and other spicy foods based on the concentration of capsaicinoids.

Spiciness is not the same as heat. It’s just an illusion that our mouths are on fire. This is because of the capsaicin that binds to pain receptors. Warning signals are sent to the brain that something is spicy. So, why do so many people enjoy spiciness? In response to the heat and pain, your body releases endorphins and dopamine that can create a sense of euphoria, much like a “runner’s high.”

WHO’S HOTTEST?

The Carolina Reaper is the world’s hottest pepper. If you love heat, try habaneros, Scotch bonnets, and Bhut Jolokias. But, let’s not leave out those who can’t take the heat. There are still peppers you can enjoy in your dishes like sweet peppers, bell peppers, and banana peppers, which can be mild enough to eat raw. Tired of peppers, but love the heat? Try wasabi and horseradish.

Enjoy adding heat to your dishes and beverages. But, if it’s too hot, don’t worry. So, how do you neutralize spiciness? Adapt the pH by adding some lemon or lime juice, vinegar, pineapple or tomatoes to the dish to cut down some of the heat. A touch of sour cream or yogurt can also soothe the fire. But, if you are a fan of the spicy, making the spicy part of your daily diet can help your health, so turn up the heat!

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May 2020 | 77

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

Mind your business.

This isn’t easy! Researchers have proven that gossip has been essential to advancing our society and creating bonds between individuals over shared experiences. At the same time, innocent chatter about personal lives can get negative fast, and the toxic nature of gossip isn’t helpful to connection or advancement.

shared experiences, food, surroundings, hobbies – anything that isn’t about someone else. If you have to talk about someone else in your conversations, chances are you might be feeling bad about yourself in some way. Check in and talk about something else.

If you’re focusing on the mean side of a conversation and notice yourself being judgmental and rude about someone, you can self-correct this negative behavior. Keep reading for tips that will help you as well as others that might get you caught up in conversations littered with rumors and hearsay.

I think a lot of gossip is linked to folks trying to be liked – the grim reality is folks that gossip about one person will probably gossip about another, and frankly the “others” might be you. We spend a lot of time being “likable” and worrying about that, and something that has always given me comfort is remembering that I’m not pizza, not everyone is going to like me. If I’m constantly focusing on who likes me and why, and making myself into someone else’s best ideal person, I’m going to be neglecting the person I want to be.

REFLECT FIRST Why are you gossiping? Take a moment and check-in.

Are you bored, lonely, jealous? Did the person you’re talking about wrong you in some way?

Are you projecting? Maybe you need to have a conversation with this person and it’s just been too difficult to do so.

Understanding your why is far more helpful than you might think! If you understand your why, you’ll be able to adjust your behavior and habits. You may or may not know this, but to effectively break a bad habit, you need to not only break it but also replace it with another habit.

To do that, you’re going to need to understand why you are gossiping, who you are gossiping about, and why that person gets this treatment.

BOND OVER SOMETHING ELSE As mentioned earlier, gossip is something that folks have used to not only bond over, but also to advance society – so it might be hard to lose this aspect of connection. Find common ground that isn’t gossip to bond over. It might be

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STOP TRYING TO BE LIKED

GO TO THE SOURCE

Have some beef with another person and that’s why you’re gossiping? Take a beat and think about going directly to the person you’re talking about. Maybe you need to sort things out or maybe you feel like you’ve been wronged by something in the past. Take the time and energy to connect with that person and sort things out versus talking behind their back.

If you don’t want to sort things out? Drop it. What’s the point of letting someone live rent-free in your head, having them at the forefront of your thoughts so much that you have to talk about them all the time? Or immediately go to them as a subject when you have nothing else to talk about? That’s A LOT of energy on someone and something that you “don’t like.” Focus your energy on things you can change and do or projects you might have, versus thinking and overthinking about someone who “wronged” you in some way.

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May 2020 | 79

This month is Alkali’s 10-year anniversary, but this is definitely not the way I thought I’d be ringing in such a special milestone. I don’t know what to say other than that we miss each and every one of you so much! Though this time off has definitely slowed us down, it will not be a set-back, and there are still plenty of reasons to celebrate. I have the best team! We will be back! And we will still have a beautiful new place to share with you soon. Please join us in celebrating this moment even though we are apart. And please remember that the best way to support us in this time is to be there for us on the other side because we love celebrating your moments in life with you. I look forward to welcoming you again.

-Amber

Walker, We could not be more proud and happy for your accomplishments. Your future is full of opportunities. Way to go! We love you more than you’ll ever know!

Love always, Mom, Dad, Zane, Taylor and Olive 80 | ForsythWoman.com

Congratulations to Kelly McGilvary!

Shady Grove Elementary Teacher of the year!

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May 2020 | 81

Conversations with Your How Do I Maintain Friendships BFF

BY REBECCA COOPER

During a Time of Quarantine?

Humans, especially women, crave social interaction, but a coronavirus quarantine isn’t the best way to cultivate friendships ….or is it?

During a time of social distancing and hunkering down at home, you don’t have to let your relationships go by the wayside. But how do you stay close to your besties during this time?

I’m so glad you asked!

There’s a big difference between distancing yourself physically and social isolation. We all need each other to help with our stress levels and to just talk things out right now.

To stay healthy mentally, physically, and emotionally there are a few things to focus on during the weeks to come.

CONNECTION WITH OTHERS MAKES THE DIFFERENCE Just because you are staying at home, or at least distancing yourself from others, doesn’t mean you cut off all contact. We are fortunate to live in a time with technology that gives us options from calling, to texting, to face timing, and multiple options in between. Use those options just to check in and see how your loved ones and friends are doing. We all deal with this situation differently, and your contact may be what gets someone through the day.

KEEP UP YOUR DAILY EXERCISE ROUTINE OR… START EXERCISING!

Personally, exercise is as much about maintaining my body as it is staying mentally healthy. The chemicals, endorphins released during exercise, cause our bodies to have fewer negative effects of stress. There truly is an ‘exercise high’ when you get your body moving. If working out alone is a downer for you and nonmotivating, look online for workouts.

Local gyms and trainers are on social media outlets daily; you just have to set the time aside to make it happen!

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BE EXTRA NEIGHBORLY

GET OUTDOORS!

The new rule of thumb is to keep six feet between you and another person, so why not gather at the bottom of your driveway with neighbors at that recommended distance? Everyone bring a beverage of their choice and just spend time talking about the situation and how each of you is dealing with all that is going on. Right now our neighborhoods look like ghost towns, but just a get-together can help you deal with the feeling of going through this alone.

Hiking and walking are great activities as long as you keep a 6-foot distance from those around you. Local parks and neighborhoods are places you can get some fresh air and also some exercise. When the walls at home start closing in, there’s no better place to go than outside.

BREAK OUT THE MONOPOLY OR A 1,000 PIECE PUZZLE…WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE TO DO?

NETFLIX AND BINGING IS ALWAYS A GOOD THING

Most of us have those board games that with regular life and activities, never get played and are sitting on a shelf gathering dust. Remember that puzzle that Aunt Ethel gave you of the Eiffel Tower, that would be a great family project? Many are also turning to arts and crafts with their kids. Another idea is to actually have a conversation addressing any fears or concerns your kids may have about this time in our world. You and your family have precious time right now to connect like never before.

FIDO GETS BORED, TOO!

Our dogs like to be where we are and many are getting spoiled having us at home every day. Fido is content doing whatever you do, so if you want some fresh air and a change of scenery, take your pup for a walk; it’s good for you and your dog.

Choose a series or a movie that you and your friends have wanted to watch and set up a time, in your own homes, to watch and then comment through texts. When you can’t be at the theatre sharing a bucket of popcorn, binge-watching on Netflix is the next best thing. You can also set up a time to call or FaceTime and discuss the show. Any way you can connect during this time is a positive.

I recently read online, ‘If you’re not using this time to rest, reset, and prioritize your purpose and people in your life, you are wasting an opportunity you may never get again.’

We’re all stir crazy, that’s a given, but I also read recently, ‘In the rush to return to normal, use this time to consider which parts of normal are worth rushing back to.’ Repeat that a few times…

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84 | ForsythWoman.com