FW June 2020

June 2020

Your Home MarketPlace June 2020 | 1

Wake Forest Baptist Health

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George K. Walker has merged with Bo-Ty Florist to bring you the best floral experience in Winston-Salem!

SAME GREAT SERVICE | OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK | EXPANDED FLOWER SELECTION | EVEN MORE EXPERT FLORAL DESIGNERS

Bo-Ty Walker Florist

Save $15 OFF $50 or more with code SUMMER15 *Valid on product totals of $50 or more before tax and delivery. Ends July 31st, 2020. Local delivery only. Restrictions apply.

Visit Bo-Ty Walker Florist at 1419 S Stratford Rd Winston-Salem, NC 27103

W W W. G E O R G E W A L K E R F L O R I S T. C O M | ( 3 3 6 ) 7 2 2 - R O S E

June 2020 | 3

GOLDMAN CENTER for Facial Plastic Surgery Facial Rejuvenation Minimally Invasive Surgery Skin Rejuvenation and Fractional Laser Therapy Fillers and Injectables

GoldmanAesthetic Center and

Functional Nasal Surgery Hair Restoration Surgery

With Offices Serving the Piedmont and the High Country 108 Dornach Way | Advance, NC | (336) 245-9595 Kinderton Village – across from Bermuda Run NEAL D. GOLDMAN, MD Double Board Certified Facial Plastic Surgeon

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717 Greenway Road | Suite A | Boone, NC | (828) 278-9230

FacialPlasticSurgeryNC.com

Brookridge Retirement

June 2020 | 5

JEJ Photos

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Lewisville Laser & Aesthetics

June 2020 | 7

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14 Keeping it Real 24 Eating Our Way Through a Pandemic 32 Welcome to Club Pilates 44 Rosey’s Review 48 COVER STORY Your Home Marketplace: Where Creativity & Imagination Are Always Affordable 64 The Ultimate Guide to Sourdough 66 Cheers! Building the Perfect Home Bar 74 Aging Gracefully 82 Ways to Navigate Difficult Conversations 92 Women on the Move

Check out our online calendar at ForsythWoman.com 8 | ForsythWoman.com

Make sure your vehicle is ready for all your summer road trips

Pat’s Body Shop

336-945-3767

Gift Certificates Available

COLLISION, DETAILING, INTERIOR, MECHANICAL & TOWING

June 2020 | 9

The View From This Side JUNE 2020

I can’t believe that it’s been a year since my dad died; there’s not a day that goes by when I don’t miss him. It will certainly be a bit of a bittersweet Father’s Day but, in a way, a blessing. I know this time of quarantine has been so hard on the elderly who can’t have visitors, and my dad would not have understood why we couldn’t see him. Still, I miss him.

With that said, though, I am still so blessed with some amazing men I get to celebrate. I want to wish my husband a very happy Father’s Day! Tim is an amazing dad to our children, and we are all so lucky to have him! We’ve really enjoyed our time together these last couple of months. We’ve been working on projects together, and after years of each of us running our own respective businesses, we’re discovering what a great team WE make!

I also want to wish my step-father Charlie, a happy Father’s Day! He’s been such a wonderful addition to our family for years! We love him so much!

As I was finishing this issue, my kids, Brooke and Tanner, came to see us for a belated Mother’s Day weekend. We haven’t seen them in weeks, so it was so great to see them! Plus, we got to meet our new grandpuppy! Tanner has adopted Ranger, and already, he and our other granddog, Carter, have become great friends. It was a wonderful weekend full of play, laughter, and non-stop fun!

Congratulations to the Class of 2020!

We know that this year’s graduation has been a challenge, but we are excited for you and wish you all the very best in your future experiences – whether college or career!

We’re so glad summer is finally here! After winter, first spring, second winter, second spring, and third winter – we are so happy to have some sunshine and warmth in our days!

We hope you and your family can get outside more now and enjoy some time together!

This month, we feature Your Home Marketplace on the cover of Forsyth Woman, and we hope you enjoy this article! This is such a neat store, and you’ll find all kinds of fun gifts and home décor for yourself!

Also, this month, we unveil another issue of Forsyth Woman Engaged! If you or someone you know is getting married, you’ll want to pick up your copy!

It’s stunning, and my daughter, Brooke, has done a fantastic job in very difficult circumstances!

Please keep being safe and remember – now, more than ever, it’s important to shop small, shop local!

Let your local businesses know you’re there for them, and be sure to Until next time, tell our advertising partners you saw them in this month’s issue!

Keela

PUBLISHER

ADVERTISING

SENIOR STAFF WRITERS

Keela Johnson | Keela@ForsythMags.com

Advertising@ForsythMags.com

Meghan Corbett | Denise Heidel | Carolyn Peterson

EDITOR Brooke Eagle | Brooke@ForsythMags.com

EDITOR’S ASSISTANT & EVENT SPECIALIST Madison Hill

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Tamara Bodford

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Brooke Eagle Heather Spivey

INTERN Alexandra Johnson

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR

OTHER CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Vonda Henderson

Eric Aft | Debbie Barr | Keith Biggs | Jen Brown Rebecca Cooper | June DeLugas | Lisa Doss | Julie Fritz Denise Heidel | Taryn Jerez | Jean Marie Johnson Debbie Lanier | Brittany Leak | Ava Lewandowski Sara Migliarese | Mack Moore | Susan Schabacker | Lauren Sephton Al Seymour | Megan Taylor | Sara Wiles | David Willard

COVER PHOTOGRAPHER JEJ Photos

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS JEJ Photos Photo Artistry by Melinda

CONTENT EDITORS Kim Beane Meghan Corbett (Assistant)

GRAPHIC DESIGN & PRODUCTION Emerson Designs

WEB DESIGN/MAINTENANCE

Nu | NuExpression.com

IT SUPPORT

Creative IT | creativeit.com

CONTACT

ForsythWoman.com 888-892-3204

FORSYTH WOMAN DISCLAIMER: Please note that the inclusion of stories and articles in Forsyth Woman magazine does not imply endorsement of products or people. The views of the authors are

presented for information and entertainment only, and may not necessarily reflect the views of Forsyth Woman. Specifically, Forsyth Woman in no way endorses any claim associated with health and/or well being with respect to any particular person. We disclaim all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose. We will not be held responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage that is caused or alleged to have been caused in connection with the use of, or reliance on, any content in this magazine. Forsyth Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Forsyth Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned. Forsyth Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited. ©2005 by Forsyth Woman, Inc.

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Massage Envy

June 2020 | 11

Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem & Mt Airy Can Offer a Free Professional Consultation

BY MACK MOORE, OWNER

At Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem & Mt Airy, we are your locally-owned dealer for custom blinds, shades, shutters, and drapes for your home.

When it comes to your home, windows are the, well, windows to its soul. So if it’s time to treat your home to a facelift, choosing window treatments is an important part of that process. Before you start perusing online, there are a few things you should know about shopping for window coverings.

THINK SAFETY If you’re like most people, you buy window coverings to get a little privacy — and safety — from the outside world. Depending on the style you have in your home, your window coverings could be making your family less safe just by decorating your windows. If you’ve got long cords spilling from your blinds, it’s time to look into a safer option. Cordless blinds are the industry standard, and that could be added motivation for you if your current household involves cords that could become strangulation hazards to children, pets, and the infirm.

With home automation, you can motorize and control your shades to look as if you are home every day. You can control damaging sunlight, cold drafts, and give the appearance of being at home. Just set the times for the shades to open and close.

CONSIDER THE LOOK FROM THE OUTSIDE IN Window treatments might only seem like a functional element, but when you’re adding them to your home, form matters just as much.

That’s why it’s essential to buy something you’ll enjoy looking at for years to come and be proud of other people seeing as well. After all, your coverings aren’t just there for your enjoyment; they also affect your home’s curb appeal. Take care when selecting window treatments that will be installed in focal-point areas, like the windows surrounding your front door or in your entryway.

CONSULT A PROFESSIONAL From design to function to safety, there are several things to consider when you’re shopping for window treatments. That’s why it’s crucial to get a professional’s guidance whenever you can. Professional consultation from Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem & Mt Airy can help you determine which solutions suit your needs and style, and can help you decide on the best options for your home and family.

New window treatments have never been more painless. Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem & Mt Airy can help with professional measuring and installation, design tips and suggestions, and addressing safety issues. We offer the best warranty in the business, and we have multiple discount programs to make it easier, including: • New homeowner discount • Whole house discount • First responder discount • Military discount • Healthcare worker or corporate discount • Or we can offer 0% financing for 18 months to qualified buyers.

As a local family-owned business connected to the industry’s largest network, Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem & Mt Airy is pleased to serve our communities of Forsyth, Stokes and Surry Counties. Let us make your windows beautiful and safer.

Contact Budget Blinds of North-Winston-Salem & Mt Airy for a free consultation at 336.701.5474, or visit BudgetBlinds.com/NorthWinstonSalem.

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Budget Blinds

June 2020 | 13

Keeping It Real SANITY AFTER THE SHUTDOWN

BY DR. DEBBIE LANIER

Confession . . . my Type-A personality leaves no room for rebooting. The list ever lingers. The sirens never cease. But that’s just it. I sabotage myself when I wait for life to tell me when to rest. I must grab the reins and tell my life when I’m shutting down for a day.

How tragic is it that it took a government-imposed time-out to get my attention? It’s jacked up!

My daughter and I returned from Israel days before the shutdown ensued. I watched the Jewish people’s rhythms of rest and recharging throughout Shabbat. I left determined to align with the cadence the Lover of my soul designed for me.

Folks, God instituted a day of rest, NOT because He needed it, but because He knew WE need it! How have we forgotten? God didn’t merely recommend pulling out of the rat race for Sabbath, He commanded it.

Why? Because, our Good Father knows that recharging renews every facet of our being . . . mind, body, soul . . . ALL OF IT! Establishing Sabbath in our lives ensures that we don’t drift too far from the One who knows us best and loves us most. That refueling time with our Good Father reframes the lens of our soul to see more clearly. It rejuvenates our ability to live and love more fully.

SO, how are you…really? This unprecedented shutdown landed on each of us differently… with a squashing thump!

Sabbath ensures we don’t drift too far from our true selves. When we wander from Him, we consequently wander from the real us, too. We eventually lose ourselves in desert places, trying to find our true home.

We ALL got sucked into this COVID cyclone before our minds could wrap around it. Our frenzied schedules halted abruptly; our entire living, confined to the same four walls indefinitely. WHEW! Isn’t it nice to re-enter the world, finally?

When we step out of life’s traffic, we can know His voice, His love, and His blessings. We’ll rekindle wholehearted trust in His promises for us.

Jesus says to us today:

I don’t think we will forget this time when the whole world slammed shut. I don’t think we know who we are on the other side of it quite yet, either. What will we carry from this shutdown?

If you’re like me, you learned some things about yourself in this crisis. Me? I discovered newfound “essentials” that seemed unnecessary before. I also realized that some previously assumed “essentials” aren’t, at all.

Personally, I long to step out of this shutdown with a different rhythm to my routine.

Many of us did not recognize our pervasive exhaustion until stillness became a mandate. Our overdrive masked the fatigue grinding at our bodies, minds, and souls. It’s ironic how we often overlook our “weary” until we get still. Then, we feel like a gnat underneath an elephant— every part of us feels the crushing!

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“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to Me. Get away with Me and you’ll RECOVER your life. I’ll show you how to take a REAL REST. Walk with Me and work with Me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced Rhythms of Grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with Me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

(Matthew 11:28-30) The One who holds the keys to our deepest longings and greatest joys, the One who holds the answer to every question and solution to every problem, the One who holds YOU . . . He designed us to weekly step out of the rat-race, so He can fill us with Himself.

What have I learned in this shutdown? I’m learning that I can do more in six days with His strength than I can do in seven days with mine. I’m still a work in progress, but I endeavor to live in a new rhythm of grace. It’s saving my life. It will save yours too. Will you join me?

For comments or prayer, contact Dr. Lanier at PastorDebbie@HopeCommunityChurch.tv.

Salemtowne Retirement

June 2020 | 15

Sun Season is here.

Vic Khemsara, MD

Be safe. Have fun.

Protect those eyes.

Laser Cataract Surgery • Dry Eye Center Summit Eye Care • Diabetic Treatment Glaucoma Treatment Multifocal Lens Implants • General Eye Exams

SUN PROTECTION FOR THE EYES

BY KEITH BIGGS, OD

Keith Biggs, OD

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.

– 1 Chronicles 16:34

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Summer is in full swing, the days are longer, the sun is hotter, the beach is calling, and out comes the sunscreen. We are ready to lather up for fullbody protection, but wait!

What about our eyes? Did you know that it’s just as important to protect your eyes from the sun’s harmful rays as it is to protect your skin? Your eyelids and the skin around your eyes are among the thinnest and most sensitive on your body.

Many people are concerned about the effects of the sun on their extremities; they shouldn’t lose sight of what the sun can do to their eyes.

Have you ever experienced a sunburn of the eye? If so, you may have experienced a condition known as photokeratitis, which can be very painful, causing blurred vision, light sensitivity, and the sensation of having sand in your eye. It can be caused by several hours of intense UV ray exposure. You can prevent photokeratitis from developing on your eyes by wearing sunglasses with UV protection. Beware, direct sunlight can be extremely damaging to eyes, whether it be 30 degrees in the winter or 95 degrees in the summer.

The intense ultraviolet UV of the sun can damage the sensitive cells in the eyes, which may lead to vision loss. Experts say that it is difficult to isolate the exact amount of damage radiation can impose on the eyes over a long period of time.

A number of studies have shown that the effects build up and may increase the chance of developing eye problems later in life, such as cataracts, macular degeneration, eye cancer, and also pterygiums (non-cancerous eye growths) which may require surgical removal.

Staring at the sun at any time is a definite no-no! This can cause holes in the retina, the light-sensitive layer of cells in the back of the eye used for clear vision. This condition is known as solar retinopathy, which is rare, but any vision loss due to this is irreversible.

What should we do to protect our eyes?

Sunglasses are a must, and they have become a huge market.

www.summiteyecare.net www.facebook.com/SummitEyeCare 336.765.0960 • 3073 Trenwest Drive Winston-Salem, NC 27103

Simply Sterling & Co.

So many brands, styles, colors, shapes – Oh, me!

How do I choose? Some helpful tips are: 1. Sunglasses should be polarized (UV protection included).

2. Wrap around glasses help to protect the eye from UV from the side.

3. Lens colors are a personal choice.

4. Protect eyes at an early age - we are never too young to begin utilizing eye protection.

We urge parents to protect infants’ and children’s eyes from the sun at all times.

Being outdoors and enjoying the sunshine is wonderful and should be enjoyed whether you are gardening, playing golf, relaxing at the pool or running in the surf. Put on those polarized sunglasses, lather on the sunscreen and top your head with a hat, and get out and enjoy your summer.

Summit Eye Care is available to answer any questions you may have concerning any eye care problems.

Call 336-765-0960 to speak with one of our eye care team.

June 2020 | 17

M1ND 6YM

HELPS YOU GET YOUR M1ND F1T

BY JULIE FRITZ

We all know it is important to stay fit. However, that doesn’t just apply to our bodies. It is equally important to keep our minds fit. Spending time doing activities that stimulate our brains, so they continue to grow, is vital to keeping our minds engaged. At M1ND 6YM in Winston-Salem, they have designed a brain games course, using escape challenges to help you stimulate your brain and provide different learning experiences throughout the month. They can also bring these mind-challenging activities to your next social or corporate event.

After going to an escape room for one of their first dates, owners Rahel (no “c”) and Mathew (one “t”) fell in love with the challenge. Even though they failed that first time, they saw the benefit of doing an activity that was mentally challenging and stimulating. They went on to own two escape rooms for the next several years.

As previous owners of escape rooms in Kernersville and Nairobi, Kenya, they have a clear understanding of how people feel about the escape room experience. They also wanted to incorporate the new science of Neurobics that they had found to be so important in their own lives. Rahel explained, “When we decided to rethink our business, we were well aware that some people don’t like the idea of being enclosed in an escape room and also, they don’t like the time pressure. We knew that there was an opportunity to make something different that could eliminate those two factors and bring people a greater understanding of the importance of brain health and the use of Neurobics.”

Neurobics is a science based on scientific evidence that uses brain exercises to increase neurological health. Dr. Lawrence Katz coined the term, and with the help of Dr. Manning Rubin, they co-wrote “Keep Your Brain Alive, 83 Neurobic Exercises to Help Prevent Memory Loss and Increase Mental Fitness.”

Rahel and Mathew are inspired by Neurobics because of the way that it uses all five senses, together with social and emotional interaction, to help the brain ignite new nerve pathways and connections, and strengthen existing ones. They have seen the benefits of how Neurobics benefits people’s memory, attention, logic, and verbal skills by disrupting everyday routines and forcing them to use their brains in new and exciting ways. M1ND 6YM is their way of sharing this with our community.

There are several different options for mind challenges and experiences at M1ND 6YM that will excite both children and adults alike. The Dojo hosts 29 challenge stations throughout the M1ND 6YM, and you download the app onto your phone to complete each one. It takes about 25 to 30 minutes per station, so plan to do between 1-3 each time you come, and to complete all 29 over a period of time. Think of each challenge station as a mini escape challenge. You will need to work with your team to think outside the box and use the clues available to solve the puzzles. At the end of each challenge station, you will receive a code. Codes are collected in the app so that your progress

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throughout the course is recorded, and you will be ready to use all the codes in the final challenge station. When you complete all 29 challenge stations, you will get a prize and a school of your choice will receive a free mind challenge session for one class.

Cost for The Dojo is $12.50 per person per challenge station.

Ages 6 and under are free with a paying adult. Ages 7- 11 must be accompanied by a paying adult. Ages 12 - 15 may play alone.

“Experiences” are social gatherings where you will have a chance to use your senses and try something new. Try a new dance, taste a new food, learn new words in a different language, listen to neuroscientists talk about new research and mental fitness.

Experiences are held periodically in the back room of the M1ND 6YM, and pricing and times differ.

Private events can be arranged at your place or at M1ND 6YM. Portable mind challenges can be used to help facilitate a team adventure from 15 to 200 guests. This is a great option for private parties, corporate and school events, and even fundraising.

Telequest is M1ND 6YM’s answer to social distancing. While we were all staying home, they came up with printable versions of escape games that are deliverable so you can play at home. You can find these directly on their website.

The M1ND 6YM YouTube channel posts weekly mind challenge videos to continue your brain fitness regiment by giving you ideas on how to break your daily routine using Neurobics. You just need to subscribe to their channel to enjoy these videos.

If you are ready to get your mind fit and have fun doing it, you need to check out M1ND 6YM today. M1ND 6YM is located at 690 Jonestown Rd Suite 150 in Winston-Salem. They are open Wednesday-Friday from 3 pm to 9 pm, Saturday from 12 pm to 9 pm, Sunday from 1:30 pm to 8 pm and closed Monday and Tuesday.

For more information, you can visit their website at m1nd6ym.com or call 336-776-3119. You can also follow them on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube by searching for M1ND 6YM. (Don’t forget the name has a 1 and a 6 M1ND 6YM)

Piedmont Federal Savings Bank

June 2020 | 19

DIY Natural Cleaning Solutions to Use Around the House

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

Making the most of your pantry essentials for safer, all-purpose cleaning solutions is a score right now. Skip the grocery store lines and potential “sold out” signs in exchange for cleaners that are easy on the environment and your wallet. Please keep all cleaning solutions out of reach of children. Even 100% pure essential oils can be harmful if not properly used.

The first step is to stock up on these simple ingredients to make almost any natural cleaner: • Hydrogen Peroxide breaks down into completely harmless water with an extra oxygen molecule, making it a safe alternative to chlorine bleach.

• Borax is simply an alkali to cut that stubborn dirt, oil, and grease.

• Baking Soda will become your new best friend, as it can scour most surfaces to perfection without fear of scratches. It works wonders with animal messes as a natural deodorizer.

• Essential Oils will bring your homemade cleaners to the next level by enhancing their scent. A few favorites include lavender, lemon, tea tree, orange, and eucalyptus.

Bonus: Did you know that tea tree oil is a natural antibacterial?

• Distilled White Vinegar is mildly acidic, which makes for an outstanding coffee and rust stain cleaner. Tip: Take a close look at the label to ensure a high concentration of 5% or more to be most effective.

• Castile Soap is best bought in liquid form to help rinse away the relentless dirt.

• Rubbing Alcohol is very common and versatile in that it can be used anywhere from an antiseptic to a surface disinfectant.

Now that we have our staples on hand, let’s break down a few simple combinations that’ll yield the most benefits.

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CARPET STAIN CLEANER

Cover the entire stain with a generous amount of baking soda. In a spray bottle, shake together a 1:1 ratio of water to white vinegar. Spray the stain evenly, then wait for the solution to set in, about 3-4 hours. Using a scrub brush, gently rub the cleaning solution into the stain, then allow it to dry overnight.

In the morning, vacuum the dried cleaning solution until the residue has disappeared!

In addition, mix together 1/4 cup borax powder, 1/4 cup table salt, and 1/4 cup white vinegar to make a paste. Then, apply the paste directly on the stain and, once again, let it dry overnight to vacuum up after 24 hours. This specific solution is most effective in killing bacteria and deodorizing protein-based stains, such as from dairy products, baby food, bodily fluids, etc.

ALL-PURPOSE CLEANER

In a 24-ounce spray bottle, add together 3/4 cup hydrogen peroxide, 2 teaspoon (unscented) castile soap, 2 cups water, 1/2 cup white vinegar, 12 drops tea tree oil, and lavender essential oil to your preference. This all-purpose cleaner is wonderful for all common cleaning needs to remove germs and leave the house smelling fresh.

GLASS AND WINDOW CLEANER

Shake together 1 cup of water, 1/2 teaspoon castile soap, and 1/4 cup white vinegar in a 24-ounce spray bottle. Using a soft microfiber or cotton cloth, use this simple cleaner for streak-free sparkles.

TOILET CLEANER

In a small spray bottle, shake together 1 cup white vinegar and 1/2 teaspoon essential oil of your choice, such as tea tree essential oil and lemon essential oil. Spray the cleaner in the toilet bowl, as well as over the seat, lid, and base. Scatter a generous amount of baking soda around the toilet bowl, then scrub with a toilet brush. Use paper towels or disposable

cloths to wipe down the toilet lid, seat, and anywhere else sprayed that is outside the toilet bowl.

ANTIBACTERIAL CLEANER

In a 24-ounce spray bottle, add together 1/2 cup white vinegar, 2 tablespoons rubbing alcohol, 3 cups water, 10 drops of tea tree essential oils, and 15 drops lavender essential oil. Shake to combine.

After two weeks, you will want to dump any homemade cleaner and make a new batch to ensure a job well done each time. The best method is labeling and dating each cleaner the same day they are made. In addition, glass spray bottles are recommended for storing any remaining cleaner to prevent any reaction with the cleaning ingredients.

The easy combinations for homemade, natural cleaning solutions are endless! From drain cleaners to tick removers, a DIY solution can almost always be found as you search through your simple pantry essentials.

Hip Chics Boutique

June 2020 | 21

THE STRING: PLANNING FOR RETIREMENT AS A WOMAN CHALLENGES FOR YOUR RETIREMENT SAVINGS THAT YOU PROBABLY HAVEN’T CONSIDERED

Being both a woman and a professional at a credit union, understanding how gender affects retirement savings is a natural desire for me. And though the intention of this piece is to build awareness among women, my hope is than men will pay attention, too. For the purposes of this article, let’s imagine that you’re holding a string. This string is a foot long and will represent your retirement savings.

Our journey will begin by briefly addressing the gender pay gap, and its influence over the length of our retirement string. Depending on several factors, such as but not limited to: occupation, race, and education, the pay gap can greatly differ among women. According to the Census Bureau CP Survey of 2018, it is estimated that for every dollar that a man makes, a woman makes around 82 cents. With a roughly 20 percent reduction from every earned paycheck, most women will find it difficult to find the extra cash to build on their nest egg.

The truth is, many women will not factor this probable shortcoming into their retirement savings plan, nor make the necessary adjustments in their approach to overcome it. Since I am a visual learner, we can revisit our string analogy to better understand the gender pay gap and its implications. For most of us, we will need to take our string and cut about 2.2 inches away. And just like that, for many women, only 9.8 inches will remain in their retirement string.

Even though equal pay would be the ideal solution, for the moment our best course of action is to proactively place as much we can into our 401k plans and/or IRAs as soon as we enter the labor force. And if you are employed at a company that offers a 401k match, this is the equivalent of free money that you should always take advantage of.

Capitalizing on company matches is a great first step to building your retirement security.

Are you thinking about having a child, or maybe two? For those that already have children, take a moment to consider how much time you took off work. Were you able to contribute to your retirement plan while you were on maternity leave? While you may not instantly recognize this, interruptions in your career limit your overall ability to save for retirement. It can be easy to overlook the potential loss of income, career opportunities, and missed raises associated with family planning.

This phenomenon is often called the motherhood penalty.

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Many mothers might consider the decision to cut back on hours or switch to a less demanding job. And in both of these circumstances, the result can be a reduction in salary and even a loss of benefits, such as access to a 401k. With this in mind, it is time to glance back at our retirement string once again. If you have a child or plan to have one, you can cut 3.3 more inches away. Why? Well, according to a study from the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College, they found that mothers of one child can earn 28% less than non-mothers over their lifetime and this increases with each additional child. While children are a great source of happiness and fulfillment, they do require a lot of time, attention, and resources. Even now, during this time of uncertainty, a common frustration for working mothers is childcare. As schools and daycares have closed down, working mothers feel that the weight of childcare and homeschooling falls disproportionately on them.

Career interruptions aren’t only associated with motherhood. The responsibility of caring for aging parents and partners frequently comes into play. Whether it’s biology or ingrained social expectations, women are often viewed as nurturers. According to the Family Caregiver Alliance, women spend 50% more of their time providing care than men.

The upshot is that many studies indicate women have longer lifespans than men, which can result in extending already scarce assets over a longer timeframe. Living longer may also mean becoming a caregiver for an aging partner, potentially forcing women into early retirement.

As such, it seems that the demands of family care and the requirements of building retirement security are often at odds. Are you already a caregiver, or do you see yourself becoming one? How much do you think you will need to trim away from your retirement string because of this?

Retirement security is not a luxury, it is a necessity. As such, it’s important for women to develop a holistic financial plan that addresses their unique retirement challenges. The earlier we start, the better we will position ourselves for success.

At Piedmont Advantage Credit Union, we want to provide the resources women need not only for today’s necessities, but for tomorrow’s security as well. Women who live, work, go to school, or worship in Forsyth County are able to join our credit union and use our many tools to assist with their financial planning. These tools can help to keep your retirement “string” longer and have you more prepared for a happy retirement!

Best Asian Restaurant & Runners Up Sushi 2019

HakkaChow

OPEN FOR TAKE-OUT Monday to Thursday 11:30 AM to 9:30 PM | Friday 11:30 AM to 10:00 PM Saturday 12:00 PM to 10:00 PM | Sunday 12:00 PM to 9:00 PM All day every day

BOGO 1/2 Sushi Roll

All day every day

Nigiri & Sashimi

$1 off

All wine bottles

30% off

(336) 893-8178 | hakka-chow.com 615 Saint George Sq Ct | Winston-Salem, NC 27103 (Right off Hanes Mall Blvd. across from the Wynnsong 12 Movie Theater)

Winner Best Asian

Best Sushi Runner Up June 2020 | 23

Eating Our Way Through a Pandemic

BY BRITTANY M. ORIE LEAK

Due to the worldwide pandemic, grocery shopping has tremendously changed. While seeing empty shelves everywhere is jawdropping, an empty refrigerator is the last sight we want to witness. We may have limits on grocery shopping now, but we must make the best food choices we can for our well-being.

GOOD MOOD FOOD!

Times of uncertainty makes us anxious and irritable.

Avocado. The avocado is rich in B vitamins, which have wonderful effects on our nervous systems. B vitamins such as thiamine, riboflavin, and niacin are associated with serotonin, a neurotransmitter that influences positive moods. A deficiency in any of these B vitamins causes us to become more vulnerable to stress and anxiety, so filling up on those B vitamins are vital.

Blueberries. These little powerhouses filled with antioxidants are loaded with vitamin C. During critical times such as this, when we’re under great stress and anxiety, our bodies crave vitamin C. This powerful nutrient helps to repair and protect our cells from the harmful effects that stress and anxiety have on our bodies and provide anxiety relief. Consuming vitamin C on a daily basis could help prevent and reduce anxiety.

Kale. Both kale and arugula have an abundance of antioxidants such as beta carotene and vitamin C. People who are highly vulnerable to feelings of stress and anxiety have low levels of antioxidants. So kale and other dark, leafy greens help promote these antioxidants and support optimal brain functioning. And in this day and time, we need to stay in our right minds!

FOR HEALTHY DIGESTION Being under tremendous stress throws off digestion.

There are many healthy foods that help our bodies digest optimally such as ginger, whole grains, fruits, and some vegetables. Ginger can help get rid of bloating and other digestive problems. You can buy whole ginger root and incorporate it in recipes, buy some ginger tea, or use it as a spice. Vegetables that optimize digestion are potatoes, beans, and legumes. Fiber is key here. The skin of these vegetables is rich with fiber, which is strongly needed for healthy digestion. Fruits that can help are apples, bananas, and oranges.

They are filled with vitamin C and potassium, which keeps digestion in check. Lastly, whole grain foods are fiber-rich! Try some delicious brown rice and quinoa.

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FOCUS AND CONCENTRATION For working at home and online classes.

Eggs are known for being the ultimate “brain food.” They still are today! Recent research suggests that egg whites contain choline, which is essential for our brain’s neurotransmitters. Egg yolks are also necessary as they help our brains send messages throughout our bodies and promote feelings of well-being.

Not only does broccoli improve cognitive function, but it also stimulates repair and renewal of brain tissue. Broccoli has a compound called sulforaphane, which helps our neural stem cells grow. If broccoli is not your speed, this same neuro-producing compound is found in Brussels sprouts.

Spinach has shown to promote mental clarity, increase physical strength, and sharpen our focus. It even improves our learning capacity (if you have kids who are learning from home, keep this in mind!)! Spinach also improves gut health which makes the brain work more efficiently.

FOR WEIGHT LOSS As many of us may be driven to gobble down on snack cakes and potato chips, it’s easy to gain weight.

Oatmeal is great for weight loss because eating one serving of oatmeal in the morning will curb appetites and keep us feeling fuller longer. When we feel full, we are not prone to keep eating. Also, oatmeal is fiber-rich, which helps clean our bodies out regularly.

Lentils such as beans, lentils, chickpeas, and chia seeds are pulses that influence weight loss because— like oatmeal—they keep us feeling full. They are rich in protein and fiber, which are also good for digestion and absorption.

Berries contain fibers that help manage our weight and are also high in fiber. Along with berries are cruciferous vegetables such as broccoli, cauliflower, and cabbage which have fibers that aid in weight loss.

ENERGY REFILL We could all use an energy refill right about now, right? Well, all the foods listed above are instrumental in giving us a natural energy boost.

Some additional foods include sweet potatoes, apples, salmon, oranges, almonds, beans, and yogurt. We need energy to sail through our Zoom workdays, online classes, household chores, workouts, and deep philosophical discussions with that one friend or sibling!

Together, we can “eat,” pray, and love our way through this difficult season.

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151 S. Stratford Road Winston-Salem, NC 27104 336.724.9800 MidtownCafeWS.com June 2020 | 25

Sixth Sense

health and wellness center Recent events have reshaped the lives of millions, if not billions, of people. We are all navigating a new normal with no clear understanding of when that may end or if it ever will. Business owners are facing even greater challenges by trying to figure out how to operate safely and maintain services for their clients and customers.

Co-Founder and CEO Nicola Roach is the co-founder and CEO of Sixth Sense Health and Wellness Center. Because of the coronavirus and stay-athome orders, she was forced to close her wellness center, but luckily, the business is still able to see patients and clients remotely. The downtown holistic wellness center offers massage therapy, acupuncture, nutrition counseling and other wellness services.

Transitioning to telemedicine was no easy task, but along with her partner, Nike Roach, Nicola found a HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability) compliant telemedicine software service.

Now, as long as the patient has internet, they can consult with the practitioner via secure video conferencing, texting or voice.

Certain services like massage and aroma steam are not possible through telemedicine, but Nicola’s team is finding creative ways to provide help to their clients. With the West End location, she saw increases in new massage clients and patient referrals from the Department of Veterans Affairs come in before the shutdown.

Over telemedicine, her senior acupuncturist and naturopathic doctor, Dr. Chelsea Wynter, is seeing a decreased number

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of patients than she normally would, but the clients she is seeing are now benefiting from a different type of care and attention.

“One positive is that I get to go into my client’s homes per se, through telehealth,” says Dr. Wynter. “So many of them love for me to see their fourlegged family members, maybe some family pictures they’ve gotten or personal touches I wouldn’t be able to see if they came to our Brookstown Avenue wellness center.”

That added touch of personal interaction can really help some clients feel comfortable enough to discuss other concerns or develop plans for the future to aid in their wellness journeys. “The downturn hasn’t broken my spirit,” said Nicola.

“I’m still very enthusiastic.

I see it as an opportunity to pause, reflect and innovate parts of our business for future enhancement.”

Although the business was granted essential status by the governor’s office recently, she will wait to reopen fully until guidelines are clearer about massage therapy treatment protocols and will focus on acupuncture and other limited contact services. The reopening of her wellness center will be gradual, she said.

Roach said she is disappointed she is not able to immediately continue serving in full capacity but finds some positives in the situation. She was able to finish some continuing education provided by the American Massage Therapy Association, spend more time with family and plan for the future of her wellness center.

Sixth Sense

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Book your first online Consultation with Naturopathic Doctor and Licensed Acupuncturist, Dr Chelsea Wynter for Just $30. Stay healthy and strong during these challenging times.

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336-723-4400 • www.6ths.com 1012 BROOKSTOWN AVE • WINSTON-SALEM NC 27101

June 2020 | 27

American Moving and Hauling Takes Care of the Details for a Stress-Free Move

BY JULIE FRITZ

Moving to a new home is an exciting time. Maybe it’s across the country or just across town, but there is a thrill in getting to experience the joy of a new place to call home. Even though it is exciting, there are a lot of details to juggle, and you need to make sure all the logistics are in place. At American Moving and Hauling, they understand how to handle those details so you can enjoy the excitement and have a smooth moving experience.

Fifteen years ago, Amy Jah opened American Moving and Hauling. She had worked as a manager for a storage company and started this moving company to fill a need she saw there. “I started helping people with their moves on the side because my customers needed help. It grew from there as I got licensed and insured and learned more and more about the business. It grew organically and into what it is today”. Today Jah’s business is an exceptional, local, woman-owned moving company with an A+ Better Business Bureau rating. Located in WinstonSalem, they can provide you with everything you need to simplify your local or long-distance move.

What really sets American Moving and Hauling apart is their attention to detail and their commitment to excellent communication. When you reach out to them about your move, you will know right away that they are there for you. They will walk you through what needs to be done and offer you options for assistance every step of the way. You will also notice that they take great pride in making sure that every person that calls their office will speak to them as soon as possible and will never wait more than a few hours to have their call answered. They have mastered the ability to communicate with their customers in a timely and professional way.

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American Moving and Hauling is a full service moving company that will customize a plan to meet the needs of any customer. They can do it all from just moving the heavy stuff to a turn-key door to door move for a 4,000 square foot home and everything in between. Their turn-key service includes packing and cleaning your current house, and cleaning and unpacking your new home. Whatever your needs are, they will put together the perfect package and make sure all the details are covered. With their years of experience, they can anticipate things you may not even think of and help make sure all your bases are covered.

In addition to their moving services, American Moving and Hauling has a 15,000 square foot storage warehouse, a wide range of boxes and packing supplies and cleaning services. They can meet your storage needs if you are looking for storage during a moving transition or if you need a place to keep overflow items from your home. There is a full line of boxes and packing supplies available for purchase and they can be delivered for free with a $200 purchase. They also offer in-home move in /move out cleaning services as well as regular home cleaning. These are just a few more ways they go above and beyond other moving companies.

If you are planning a local or long-distance move, call American Moving and Hauling today so they can take care of all the details and you can relax and enjoy your move.

They are located at 535 E Clemmonsville Rd, Suite D in Winston-Salem. You can call them for your customized quote at 336-765-3499. For more information, visit their website at americanmovingandhauling.com, and you can also follow them on Facebook.

Restoration Med Spa

June 2020 | 29

The Outdoors is Calling Us Spring market this year had to be canceled; however, despite the pandemic and shutdown, our manufactures were kind enough to mail us catalogs, samples, and fabrics.

With each turn of the page, there is an air of excitement and optimism with all the new fabrics and outdoor furnishings available. It certainly has me looking forward to getting outside and enjoying the beautiful warm weather instead of being cooped up in the house. We are always eager to create and imagine new looks for our clients when we receive new fabrics.

Here at June DeLugas Interiors, we are ready and enthusiastic to meet customers and clients so that we may take care of their design needs. Planning an outdoor space is no different than an indoor space. With a spark of inspiration, such as a new and fresh fabric, we begin to imagine the outdoor space. We will then put together a drawing, find our manufacturer and products that will fit the need of our client, create the completed look, and show it to the client.

One manufacturer, Sunbrella fabrics, has so many outdoor options to inspire your space. The world of color can be yours. People want to get the most value for their purchases and outdoor furnishings are no different. We have many options to fit your budget and we can create your dream escape or entertaining area. Our favorite shades of green and blue are currently popular. And we do not want to forget yellow; it is making a comeback into our lives with pillows and fabrics. Fabrics may have green, gray, yellow, and blue with a cream background. I have to say, yellow provides depth and a refreshing new appeal from the past.

It is that simple with Sunbrella fabrics: the miracle fabric made in North Carolina. Let your outdoors become your oasis!

God bless,

PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF JAY SINCLAIR

Concluding with a few answers about outdoor furnishings and fabrics: Our Lane Venture cushions can be left outside without worry, because they are as strong as they are beautiful, and they will withstand the elements for years

to come. It is important to vacuum dirt from your outdoor rugs, periodically. To clean mildew from cushions, first vacuum well. Then, prepare a solution of l cup bleach + l/4 cup mild liquid soap + 1 gallon of warm water. Spray the solution on the entire area and allow to soak into fabric for l5 minutes. Rinse thoroughly to remove all soap residue. Clean entire surface with soft cloth and then air dry.

North Carolina’s Premier Interior Design Firm 2575 Old Glory Road, Clemmons | 336-778-1030 30 | ForsythWoman.com

Breath of Fresh Air

PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF JAY SINCLAIR

June DeLugas Interiors

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Light & Bright Outdoor Furnishings by Lane Venture

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2018, 2017, 2016, 2016, 2013

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June 2020 | 31

Club Pilates

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WELCOME TO CLUB PILATES!

BY DENISE HEIDEL, PHOTO BY JEJ PHOTOS

Who should take a Pilates class? That’s an easy answer – anyone and everyone!

Pilates is a fitness technique that has been around for over 100 years, originating in Germany by Joseph Pilates. It’s an exercise that’s focused on posture, flexibility, and core strength. While Pilates is embraced by professional athletes worldwide, Pilates is a fitness regime that is designed for anyone who wants to improve their range of motion, increase their flexibility, and just feel healthier and stronger.

CLEANLINESS AT CLUB PILATES

In January 2020, Kristin Henry opened Club Pilates in Winston-Salem.

Centrally located in Thruway Shopping Center, Club Pilates was only open for two months when the COVID-19 Pandemic forced them to close. “Despite the closure,” said Kristin, “We were very fortunate.

The community has quickly welcomed us, and we’ve established a wonderful network of members. Throughout the weeks of quarantine, we offered our members free, virtual classes as a way to stay in touch and continue to support everyone.”

“We are excited to welcome back our current members as well as new members who are looking to join us for the first time!” Kristin continued ”We are happy to provide a clean place for people to exercise during these times.” She added “Our equipment is spaced at a comfortable 6’ distance, which gives everyone ample personal space. At Club Pilates, we don’t share the toys. During class members use their own set of training equipment which is cleaned after each use. And with COVID-19 concerns on everyone’s minds, we have taken [removed “some”] extra steps to ensure everyone’s comfort and safety including air purifiers, touchless check-in, and increased cleaning.”

TEACHER TRAINING PROGRAM

For many, the economic impact of COVID-19 has forced them out of jobs and businesses. Many are considering career changes. “At Club Pilates, we offer a fantastic Teacher Training Program for anyone who is interested in making Pilates their career,” explained Kristin. “I love this program as it opens the door for those who love Pilates to dive deeper into the practice and to have a positive impact on the health of the community.”

“Our Teacher Training Program,” she continued, “is a 500-hour program that is designed to fully equip new Pilates instructors – even those who have no experience! We are always looking for caring and compassionate individuals who we can mentor on the Pilates principles and exercises to become amazing instructors and community leaders. The full program can be done within six months, or up to a year.” Kristin added “If anyone is interested in the Teacher Training Program at Club Pilates, they should contact me at the studio.”

“Opening our new studio in Winston has been an amazing journey. I’m thrilled to have such an amazing team and such wonderful members,” said Kristin. “I love being a small business owner in this community, and I look forward to years of growth together. We can’t wait to welcome everyone to Club Pilates!”

Club Pilates is a locally-owned and operated franchise. It is located at 371 Lower Mall Drive in the Thruway Shopping Center. Call Club Pilates at 336.717.1222 or visit online at ClubPilates.com/ WinstonSalem. Be sure to Like Club Pilates (Winston-Salem) on Facebook and follow them on Instagram and Twitter.

June 2020 | 33

Why Transitions are Hard (and how to make them better)

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

FIND THE CORE

STACK THE DECK

These shifts are difficult because we develop comfort for consistency. When the consistency is taken away, we feel off-balance and experience anxiety. This anxious feeling when things change is because of the unknown: we have no idea what will happen next, and those possibilities are endless. What if this happens?

What if that happens? All of these timelines, especially some of the worst-case ones, make things very difficult when accepting change and transitions.

You’re worried about looking for a new job. This is a career transition (and one that can be nerve-wracking!) and a change. Some “what ifs” might be:

No.

Before diving into things you can do to work on that anxiety in the unknown, it’s important to know your stress response. You’ve probably heard of Fight or Flight, a theory from the 1920s that we experience a combative or a fleeing reaction during stress. Over the last 100 years, psychologists and physiologists have expanded that to include Freeze and Appease.

If you’re uncertain of what you do during stressful moments of change, take a moment to think of the last time you experienced change-related stress. Did you: Fight: Belabor the point, get combative and aggressive?

Flight: Retreat from the situation and back off?

Freeze: Go blank, blackout, and have nothing to say?

Appease: Start apologizing, smiling, or giggling?

I’m not accomplished enough.

We know the past few months have been hard. That’s the understatement, right?

Why are even small changes difficult? Moving is a large change, but what about schedule changes, time changes, Daylight Saving, or even transitions when you’re speaking or taking over control in a meeting.

When you know your stress response, you can move forward with working on those reactions.

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Once you know your stress response, start the going down the “what if” spiral. This might sound counterintuitive, but hear me out: when you voice the possibilities, you can assign them meaning. For example:

I’ll never find a job.

I’ll never make enough money.

And so on. Looking at those what-ifs, are they grounded in reality? Are they things you have control of? Or are they anxious worries?

Now take some time to address that fear response from earlier – are you tapping into one of those when you think about those what ifs?

After you answer that question, think about your why. Why do you think, for example, that you aren’t accomplished enough? Truly answer that question, and not with a “because it is.” Give yourself some credit and dig into the core of your anxiety.

Now that you might have a few answers about why you worry about change and transitions, step back and start stacking the deck in your favor. We worry about change and transitions because of the negative possibilities. Think about it: last time you were concerned, did you say, “Oh, wow, I’m super scared about this amazing and great thing that might happen!”

You worry about the negative! And that’s completely fine; I’m not insisting that you become an overly positive person. I’m asking for realism. If you’re going to name off five negative things that might happen, try to name as many positive things.

This is difficult, because negative things are just easier sometimes, because of a combination of self-esteem issues, nerves, imposter syndrome – and a history of negative things associated with change. You might have one major negative moment associated with change, and that’s all you can think of. Never mind all of the positive things that might have occurred with change: we sit in the negative.

If you’re dwelling in the negative and anxious, be sure to spend the same amount of time dwelling in the positive and possibilities. It’s only fair!

While this isn’t an exhaustive guide to dealing with change, it’s a start. Put yourself in the right mindset, right from the beginning.

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Paparazzi Hair Salon: At It Again

BY DENISE HEIDEL

The COVID-19 pandemic has taken a tremendous toll on local businesses with the government defining who is classified as essential and non-essential.

Unfortunately, the hair industry was deemed non-essential, and Paparazzi Hair Salon was forced to close on March 25th. Unlike restaurants and retails stores that had ways to adapt, the hair and personal grooming industry did not have that flexibility. Owner Bobbie Skinner said, “Despite our inability to work for eight weeks, we are beyond grateful for the love and support we got through our clients’ text messages, social media messages, and emails. We thank them for purchasing gift certificates on our Facebook page to help us out and show their support for small business!

We have missed them so much, and it’s great to know that in our clients’ eyes, at least – we are essential and valued. And that knowledge – it’s priceless.

“But,” continued Bobbie, “we are aware that with our re-opening, there are concerns. We wanted to alleviate those and help answer some of the questions that may cross our clients’ minds.” Bobbie and the Paparazzi team want their clients to understand the sanitation practices that happen in the salon, especially as they relate to safety measures under COVID-19 restrictions.

1. Barbicide. “Barbicide is disinfectant that has been used by hair salons and cosmetologists since 1947,” said Bobbie. “It’s effective at killing viruses, including Coronavirus, and all the stylists in our salon have been certified in the proper use of Barbicide.”

2. Masks. “Our team will be wearing masks to protect both them and our clients. However, we will not require our clients to wear masks*.”

3. Social Distancing. “Thankfully, our salon is already set up and conducive to social distancing,” said Bobbie. “Our stations are six feet apart and have a half-wall between each station.”

4. Sanitation. “Salons are already highly sanitized places of operation, due to the requirements of the North Carolina Board of Cosmetic Art Examiners, but we are adding additional steps to our already high standards. We will be conducting additional sanitation measures, including the allowance of extra time between clients to thoroughly clean each station, swap out capes, and ensure that each station is clean and ready for the next client.

In addition to Barbicide, we have invested in medical-grade cleaners to sanitize each station.”

5. In-House Capacity. “We will be following NC guidelines in regards to the number of clients we have in the shop at any given time*,” said Bobbie.

“This has been a difficult time for many,” said Bobbie. “Namely, the frustration of not being able to work. Our team loves what we do. Doing hair is more than making someone look pretty or handsome.

This is a very relational kind of business. For many, we serve as a kind of “hair-apist”—someone to talk to and listen to them. We are in the business of making people feel good about themselves! We love to help a client walk out of our salon with their head held a little higher, not only because they look good, but because we did what we could to uplift them emotionally as well. All small businesses matter.

We are all essential, and we are so happy to be back at work, doing what we do best: serving others.”

Paparazzi Hair Salon is located at 6000 Meadowbrook Mall Court in Clemmons. Call them at 893-7169.

Visit online at PaparazziHairSalon. com. Be sure to like them on Facebook and follow them on Instagram!

Walk-ins are welcome!

*This statement is based on the information available at the time this article was written.

Should state regulations issue additional restrictions and recommendations, Paparazzi Hair Salon will accommodate and modify, as required.

36 | ForsythWoman.com

We are here for all of your hair needs in the heart of Clemmons

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6000 Meadowbrook Mall Court • Suite 6A • Clemmons, NC 336-893-7169 • www.paparazzihairsalon.com Monday - Friday 9am - 6pm or until | Saturday 9am - 3pm

June 2020 | 37

Lessons Learned from the Pandemic

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

From the most frightening experiences comes education and clarity. How often during the pandemic, did you say, “I wish I were better prepared?” At this moment, each of us can change our lifestyle to reflect the next unknown situation. And, yes, something unexpected will arrive, perhaps, in the form of a blackout, extreme weather or virus. In thinking about the long list of items that would help a wide range of situations, consider allocating a set amount of money each month towards the cause of preparation.

STORAGE

The term “emergency” implies a panicked and hurried moment when you can find the current needs in one centralized location. It may be a closet or shelving unit, which contains various light and energy sources, first aid and medical supplies, blankets, portable and drinkable water, and food. Have open conversations with your family to ensure each member can feel safe.

FOOD AND TOILETRIES

Reflecting on our grandparents’ minimalist lifestyle, they stocked pantries with canned foods, gardened and stored vegetables, and made clothing and quilts. The detailed knowledge can live on if we start adopting those invaluable habits. For instance, start purchasing two as canned and papered goods, cleaning supplies and other everyday items run low.

Additional tips: • Food saver vacuumed sealers aid in eliminating waste and prolongs the life of dry goods and meats.

• Invest in oxygen absorbers, Mason jars, food-grade buckets and Gamma lids to store flour, sugar, Jasmine rice, dehydrated soups and other items.

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WELLNESS AND HEALTH

Prepackaged foods, while convenient, do not inform consumers of the full list of ingredients; therefore, when possible, make homemade meals.

Ask family and friends for their most requested recipes. You can tweak flavoring by adding a variety of spices to each meal. Consider investing time to learn about medicinal herbs, which boost immunity and overall health.

MEDICAL KIT

In the current times of limited access to medical help, start planning for situations involving dehydration, fever, wounds and infections. While you will need antiseptics, gels and creams, individualized packets accommodate storage and practicality. Add to the list gauze, tape and liquid skin sealer.

Gatorade in powdered form would aid thirst. Do you have access to clean water? Perhaps, invest in a purification system, such as a Brita. And, start growing medicinal plants, such as aloe, echinacea, basil and peppermint!

LEARNING NEW LIFE SKILLS

Despite your profession and career, you have essential skills that serve during times of need. Perhaps, it relates to medicinal herb knowledge, soap making, archery, hunting, animal husbandry, cooking, sewing or woodworking. Share your skills by creating a how-to video through social media.

More importantly, resources are available for you to start learning a new life skill. Is now the ideal time to become a beekeeper or raise chickens?

MONEY AND TRADE

Have you noticed the number of businesses that no longer use credit cards due to the incurred cost of each transaction? As consumers, we have modified our means of payment by bringing along our checkbooks or cash, on occasion. The need to have quick access to money may become a future need. Try to think about having enough cash on hand to afford gas, food and other essentials. Even if you can budget $25 to $50 monthly, the growing nest egg will come in handy! In thinking outside the box, do you have items for trade, such as tools or knives, off-road diesel or gasoline? In not knowing what could occur, it’s good to have an open mind to consider a wide range of possibilities.

THE NEEDS OF CHILDREN

Between consignment stores and yard sales, take the opportunity to stock up on clothing for your growing child. Use a Rubbermaid container to store essential items, such as underwear and socks, cotton clothing and, especially, shoes. While the necessities of toiletries are vital to the household, it’s important to remember children’s toothpaste, vitamins and pain medicines.

PODCASTS AND BOOKS

A large quantity of information is available in a variety of forums. Google “The Survival Mom,” “The Patriot Nurse,” “The Homesteading Family” and Jack Spirko’s “The Survival Podcast.” Learning how others plan to live a self-sustained lifestyle can only encourage you to start thinking outside the box, whether you live on a small or large plot of land.

Start today to create a feeling of security!

Engage in an open conversation with your spouse, extended family and best friends to see how you can work together in the endeavor of preparedness!

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Here for our community.

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June 2020 | 39

BY DENISE HEIDEL

When you’re talking to a brand new Winston-Salem resident or a visitor, and you share how amazing Ryan’s Restaurant is, you may get some odd looks. But the natives know – we’re not talking about THAT Ryan’s…. we’re talking about OUR Ryan’s. Ryan’s Restaurant – Steaks, Chops, & Seafood. Extraordinarily delicious and exceptional service. Ryan’s Restaurant has been synonymous with fine dining, elegance, and special occasions in Winston-Salem for over 40 years.

Dennis Carter assumed full ownership in 2019, but he’s been a part of the Ryan’s story from the very beginning. “The concept,” Dennis explained, “originated with Scott Richardson and Kermit Phillips back in 1976. I was actually managing a restaurant in Greensboro at the time, and Kermit was one of my regular customers. He shared the vision with me and asked me to take a look and consider working for them.

The idea was intriguing. They had identified some property that was just minutes away from the 800+ executives who were working at RJ Reynolds Tobacco Company and around the corner from Whitaker Park.

I agreed that the potential was tremendous.

“Construction began, and we were repurposing before it was even a term! All the bricks in our building were reclaimed bricks from the Robert E. Lee Hotel that used to sit where the Benton Convention Center is now. That property was demolished in 1972, and we were able to bring that bit of history (which dates back to 1921) into our walls.”

The restaurant opened on July 25, 1977, and Dennis was there for the initial launch and first few months of operation. While he did briefly return to his previous employer, in 1981, Dennis returned and has been a part of Ryan’s Restaurant ever since.

A

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“After I returned in 1981, we began looking for some additional leadership. I was able to recruit Jeff Sparks, a tremendously capable leader in the restaurant industry. And eventually, we bought out the original owners. And last year, I bought out Jeff.

But it was a long, successful partnership, and we are very proud of what we’ve accomplished at Ryan’s Restaurant.”

Beyond the loyal customer base, Ryan’s is unique in that the staff turnover is extremely low. “We have 48 team members on average, and we have servers and bartenders who have been with us for ten and, in some cases, 20 years. Even our Assistant General Manager!

She started with us as a 17-year-old and is two decades into her tenure with us! Our kitchen staff has approximately 100+ years of combined experience. The team’s expertise, as well as their loyalty to Ryan’s Restaurant, has been a huge part of our success.”

Dining at Ryan’s Restaurant is truly a unique experience.

“This is where people come for an exquisite meal in an enchanting environment. Just a look at our woods – it’s hard to remember we’re literally five minutes away from downtown Winston-Salem.

The woods and the creek add to our ambiance and charm,” said Dennis.

“Make plans to join us for the first time or the 500th. We are always eager to welcome old friends and make new ones!”

Ryan’s Restaurant is located at 719 Coliseum Drive in Winston-Salem.

Call to make reservations at 336.724.6132 or visit online at RyansRestaurant.com. Be sure to like Ryan’s Restaurant on Facebook.

W I N S T O N - S A L E M

L A N D M A R K

F O R

4 3

Y E A R S RYAN’S RESTAURANT & COVID-19

COVID-19 has created issues for everyone, and during the weeks of quarantine, Ryan’s Restaurant, along with many, has had to re-work their business model to adapt to the social distancing rules and regulations. However, they are eager to welcome back their guests for in-house dining! “We are completely safety-conscious not only for the sake of our customers but also our staff,” shared Dennis. “We are following the appropriate policies and procedures to safely welcome diners back into our dining rooms while maintaining appropriate distance for everyone. If there are any questions about our safety procedures, concerned patrons are welcome to call us at the restaurant or send us a message through Facebook.”

June 2020 | 41

So You Want to be a Speaker

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

It seems like everyone I talk to nowadays wants to be a public speaker. I remember not too many years ago people had little to no interest in public speaking, or thought it was reserved for celebrities or folks that were major players in their industry.

Little did we all know that we’d reach a point in 2020 where people would be calling themselves “thought leaders” and deciding that they, too, had a story to tell, and an idea worth spreading a la TED Talk.

Don’t get me wrong – this is great! I absolutely love the passion and enthusiasm to get yourself out there, hop on video, submit for a conference, connect with an audience.

I also understand how hard it is to be a speaker, and how folks get very, very discouraged quickly if they don’t see the returns they are expecting. And who can blame them? It seems like everyone in the age of “post your highlights” social media is “winning all the time.”

As someone who has done three TEDx Talks, is paid to be a speaker and trains speakers, no one is winning all the time.

You can, however, start making the moves to put yourself on a trajectory of becoming a speaker! Here are a few of my favorite tips:

WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO?

If you look at this question and think “everyone!” I want you to stop immediately.

Go back. Think! Who are you talking to? Narrow it as much as possible. The best talks reach a very specific group of people, whether that is “professional women looking for confidence in their career” or “moms that are starting a side hustle” or “single women that don’t want to get married.”

You need to be specific and focused. Sure, other people will find you and your information interesting – this isn’t to say that the only people that are allowed “in” to hear you speak are

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the people that are in your tightly defined audience. This is to say you should build your audience with people that already see your value.

One of the most powerful things another business owner told me also applies to speakers – focus on the people that already like and love you. Those are the people that will stick around.

Don’t waste your energy on people that are not fans of yours – that energy is better spent on people that like and love you.

WHAT ARE YOU OFFERING THEM? Motivational speaking is something that is now mostly done by celebrities and social figures. This isn’t to say you don’t have motivational talent – most “normal” people aren’t being paid to do basic motivational speaking. If you are offering something specific – a plan, advice, an idea, a focus, a takeaway – then you’ve got something! Yes, you’ll also motivate your audience – the key is to inspire them to do something tangible. That call to action that you’re so used to seeing in your email box or on your favorite website? Think about how you can take what you have to offer and convert it into a call to action for your highly specific audience.

WHY YOU? If you understand why you are the best person for this specific offer to this specific audience, you’re golden.

This doesn’t mean compare yourself to other people that are in this space – what it does mean is think about your unique value add. It might be your personal experience or your offer or the success you’ve had in the space that you’re talking about or talking in – whatever it is, make sure it is specifically defined, and you can sum it up in a few short sentences. While you might not tell people these specific sentences, you should use this as a lens when you talk to people – and a confidence boost. You are the best person to talk to your group about your specific offer. Promise.

Homestead Hills

June 2020 | 43

151 S. STRATFORD ROAD | WINSTON-SALEM, NC 27104 | 336.724.9800 | MIDTOWNCAFEWS.COM

BY ROSEY, PHOTOS BY PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

It’s kind of weird to write a Rosey’s Review these days since restaurant dining rooms have been closed since mid-March. But here we are. It’s May, and they are still closed, but I’m optimistic that the restaurants will have dine-in services available by the time the June issue comes out. In the meantime, let’s talk about Midtown Cafe & Dessertery! Of all the restaurants to be on my list for this month, this one is perfect. My family and I have been loyal patrons of Midtown for well over 20 years. It’s one of our favorite places to go because there’s something for everyone, the service is always outstanding, and well… breakfast for dinner, of course!

Brinner, as it’s known in our family, is one of the best things ever. So to write a review about Midtown is easy peasy! I know them well and love them much!

I’ve been in touch with the owner, Jeff Cayton, throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, and like many small, locally owned businesses, Midtown has been adapting to the circumstances. “We’ve found that the present challenge has really awakened our imaginations to the possibilities of what we can offer our customers,” said Jeff. “Our focus has been on offering great features like the Friday Night Seafood Fry and great feed-thewhole-family take home offerings like Moravian-style Chicken Pies, Quiches, and Lasagnas.” Midtown has even upped their game on their successful, long-standing dessert offerings with weekly individual dessert features!

They have worked tirelessly to provide for families during the time of quarantine. My family has been one of them, and we’ve ordered takeout on several occasions.

With that in mind, let me share a few things that I’ve tried recently. First, let’s talk about the Asiago Drop Biscuits. These are the carbs you dream about when you are on a diet. My husband actually picked up a box of these as an impulse buy when he stopped to get an order for us, and I was delighted that he did. These biscuits were soft and delicious! A perfect balance with the cheese, so they weren’t too heavy or greasy! YUM!

Midtown Dessertery

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On the Comfort Classics Menu, I recommend everything.

No one says you have to eat all four entrees at one time. You can nibble on them a little at a time. But it’s too hard to choose a favorite, so just go for all of them. No one is going to judge you, least of all me.

Let me tell you why...

First, fried chicken lovers, brace yourself for Midtown’s Buttermilk Fried Chicken. Now, THIS is my kind of fried chicken! It’s boneless, and since I have issues with eating bone-in meat (especially things like fried chicken that you typically eat with your hands), I appreciate this attention to detail! It’s also skinless – another win for me because I never eat the skin. I know some of you are starting to wonder why I’m a food reviewer…. I suppose, while I’m in confession mode, I should also tell you that I don’t like sweet iced tea either…. I know, I know – I should hand in my Southerner card, but I promise, I’m a North Carolina native. But getting off that rabbit trail, you can still trust me about this review of Midtown’s fried chicken! This boneless, skinless chicken is still battered, fried, and crispy as well as crazy flavorful and tender!

It’s the best part of fried chicken without dealing with greasy skin and worrying about scraping your teeth on the bone.

Hands down, one of my favorite dishes on the Midtown menu is the Midtown Meatloaf. Two thick slices of meatloaf are served with two sides and a delicious vegetable red sauce. What I love about this meatloaf is that it’s not super heavy. And I love that it’s not coated in ketchup (I’m not going down another rabbit trail), but the vegetable red sauce adds a flavor punch that complements everything about the dish.

And Mama Mia! Let’s talk about lasagna! Midtown offers two signature lasagna options, and they are both excellent comfort food choices – the Meat Lasagna and the Roasted Butternut Squash Lasagna. Both are hearty, even the vegetarian option! Both lasagnas are packed with flavors and everything you want from a heaping helping of good lasagna!

Right now, on Midtown’s seasonal menu, there are a number of delicious yummies to try, including:

Herb Grilled Chicken: I’ve had this one, and it’s divine! I wish I could cook chicken the way Midtown does! I love the coconut rice and asparagus that comes with it!

Slow Roasted Pulled Pork: My husband had a field day with this dish when we ordered recently. It was decadently good! Slow roasted with apple barbecue sauce – so good! It’s served with Midtown’s Mac and Cheese and their Collard Greens, which are beyond delicious. If you’re not a collard greens fan, just trust me on this one. I order them often as a side by themselves! They are fantastic!

Midtown Chicken Wings: So I’ve already admitted that I don’t like to eat meat on a bone, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like chicken wings! It just takes me longer to eat them because I have to pick the meat off with a fork. Thankfully though, Midtown serves really meaty wings – it makes my job easier! And with a variety of sauces – Mild Apple BBQ, Medium Buffalo, or Spicy Polynesian – there’s something for everyone!

Grilled Flank Steak: Another seasonal classic

– this is a delicious flank steak that is cut in strips, marinated, and grilled to perfection! Served with a chimichurri sauce, it’s a flavorful way to enjoy a beef dish along with classics like mashed potatoes and asparagus! YUM! Midtown also offers this cut of steak as an option for the Ultimate Steak Quesadilla! The steak is served with caramelized onions, peppers, and cheese! Phenomenal!

Citrus Grilled Mahi: This dish screams summer, and all that’s missing is a tropical breeze. Grilled Mahi is garnished with citrus sauce and pineapple relish and served with coconut rice and asparagus.

A healthy option and a delicious one, too! Midtown also has a Mahi Tacos option that speaks to all the taco lovers out there.

Fish ‘n Chips: Midtown’s Fish ‘n Chips are a favorite for my husband who loves the batter they use on the codfish! Served with fries, it’s a classic!

The Big Fried Chicken Sandwich: So I haven’t

officially tried this one, but I have already raved about Midtown’s fried chicken. I see so many things right about this – fried chicken – yum. Dill pickles – yum. Lettuce, tomato, house-made ranch dressing – yum, yum, and yum! This is a great idea I can’t wait to sample!

If you haven’t already, this is THE time to get on board with the shop small, shop local movement!

Our local businesses need us! From restaurants and retail stores – we’ve got to continue to show our support! Be sure to do your part, and when you go to Midtown next time, be sure to let them know that you’re happy to see them opened and let them know that Rosey sent ya!

June 2020 | 45

Second Harvest Food Bank

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June 2020 | 47

Your Home MarketPlace Where Creativity & Imagination Are Always Affordable

BY DENISE HEIDEL, PHOTOS BY JEJ PHOTOS

For over 22 years, the Kinnaman family has operated a business out of their 11,000 square feet of retail space located at 670 South Stratford Road in Winston-Salem. Originally known and loved as Kinnaman’s Furniture, the business took a new direction in 2019.

“After processing three tractor-trailers’ worth of furniture a week for 20-some years, my mom, Niki, was ready to retire,” said Michelle Kinnaman. “Or at least semi-retire, and turn the bulk of the business over to me. And I was ready to make a change to the business model.”

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But Niki is definitely a part of the operation. Michelle and Niki are a mother-daughter duo who show no signs of slowing down. However, Michelle’s new business model is something that enables them to give back, support others, and still be in touch with the customers they’ve grown to know and love after over two decades in business.

YOUR HOME MARKETPLACE OVERVIEW “We are no longer exclusively a furniture shop,” Michelle explained. “We are a vendor mall, featuring over 75 vendors in our store.

But to be clear – we are not an antique mall.

It would be most accurate to refer to us as a designer-boutique mall. We are extremely selective about our vendors, and we have such an incredible array of home items, gifts, and clothing! The sky really is the limit when it comes to the unique selection of inventory at Your Home Marketplace.”

She continued, “The store needs to be experienced to be fully appreciated. People are always surprised at their first visit.

We don’t look that large from the outside, but once inside, there is much to be discovered.

Our vendors have carefully arranged their inventory in such a beautiful, inviting way – one could spend hours looking and discovering new things!”

THE VENDORS From original artwork, repurposed home goods, vintage items, and handmade gifts – the vendors who showcase their wares at Your Home Marketplace are in great company with one another. “We hand select our vendors,” shared Michelle. “And currently, we have a waiting list. We were very proud that when our initial six-month vendor contracts were up for renewal, 90% of our vendors re-signed with us. It’s a testament to the relationship we have fostered and developed with them as we act as a liaison between their inventory and the customers who visit our shop.

“Our vendors take a lot of pride in their allotted space. Every vendor space is decorated tastefully and never cluttered. Vendor inventory sells quickly, so there is always something new to see. Our store is neat and clean, and our vendors have helped create a warm, inviting atmosphere for our customers.”

June 2020 | 49

SOMETHING FOR EVERY ROOM Michelle and Niki Kinnaman are hardly passive when it comes to the business. Though the inventory is ever-changing and based on 75+ vendors, they still know what they have in house and where things are located. Moreover, they know what their customers want. “We’ve found that the millennial generation loves the mid-century modern look, and we have several vendors who feature that type of furnishings and home accessories,” said Michelle. “After 20-years in the furniture business, it’s been fun to see things come back around and learn how a new generation is decorating with some of the unique pieces that cross paths in our store.

And we have the popular mid-century modern, as well as Modern Farmhouse, market samples, as well as repurposed and antique furniture.

“We can also help anyone who is looking for a specific something,” she continued. “For instance, with summer in full swing, setting up an outdoor living room is a priority for many families. We have plenty of garden furniture and accessories in stock, as well as indoor/ outdoor area rugs, which add a great deal of homey-ness to a deck or patio. We have some wonderful wind chimes that are just begging to be enjoyed as one sips tea on a lazy summer evening!”

AN ART GALLERY “At Your Home Marketplace, we feature many local artists, as well as two nationally-known artists,” said Michelle. “We are so proud of the talent in our community. Winston-Salem is home to some true artisans, and our walls are covered with their work. The artwork in the store really is one-of-a-kind, and features everything from cityscapes to landscapes.”

A GIFT SHOP “Perhaps it’s a gift! Our vendors’ inventory has everything from food products to jewelry… children’s games and clothes… candles, baskets, books, mirrors, artwork, bags, and so much more! It’s impossible to list them all! But a couple of items to point out…. One of our vendors invented a really creative “Bowl-der Holder.” These are rounded and shaped trivets that a bowl can sit in as it’s being microwaved, and removed from the microwave without creating burns! It’s so clever, and she makes them in college and national team patterns!

“We also have two craftsmen who hand make ‘live edge’ tables from various wood types such as black walnut, mahogany, and cherry. They are incredible and functional works of art!”

Your Home Marketplace is located at 670 South Stratford Road in Winston-Salem. Call the store 336.659.0099 or visit online at YourHomeMarketplaceNC.com. Be sure to like Your Home Marketplace on Facebook and follow them on Instagram! If you are a vendor interested in learning more about Your Home Marketplace, stop by the shop with pictures of your merchandise. Michelle and Nikki will review.

Currently, there is a waiting list to become a vendor at Your Home Marketplace.

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Michelle also shared that for the hard-to-buy-for, Your Home Marketplace is the ultimate destination for gifts for any age. “One of the most unique pieces in the store is an original antique wooden pinball machine! What dad wouldn’t love this? It’s circa the 1930s and in impeccable condition! It’s a great showpiece and a definite conversation starter!”

YOUR HOME MARKETPLACE IS ONLINE For the Kinnamans, it’s not just about the success of their business. It’s about the success of ALL the businesses represented in their store. “We care about our vendors and their success,” said Michelle. “We are essentially supporting 75+ small business owners through our own small business. And we are tireless when it comes to promoting our vendors online and on social media. We are constantly updating Facebook and Instagram with pictures of our inventory and showcasing the products available. And on Tuesday and Thursday nights from 7 – 7:30 PM, I host ‘Live with Lee’ on Facebook!”

“Live with Lee is our twice-a-week online get together with our customers, which allows them to enjoy special pop-up sales from the comfort of their home, as well as meet some of our vendors! We’ve had a lot of fun with ‘Live with Lee,’ and look forward to continuing it regularly. It’s a great way to shop if you haven’t had time to stop by the store!”

In addition to their Facebook and Instagram accounts, Michelle is also diligent about updating the Facebook marketplace! “We work hard to get the word out about our store’s ever-changing inventory,” said Michelle. “We have had customers drive all the way from Georgia because of our commitment to making our store bigger than the four walls of our physical brick and mortar location.

“Supporting small business has always been important,” said Michelle. “It’s the infrastructure of the American economy! And never has it been more important to shop small, shop local. Our COVID-19 world has wreaked havoc on our economy, but we are proud that our business is helping others through this.

We, along with our customers, are supporting local entrepreneurs and artists….

It’s the best kind of business to be in!”

Your Home Marketplace

Your Home MarketPlace

Where Creativity & Imagination Are Always Affordable!

Multi-vendor Market — 336.659.0099 | 670 S. Stratford Rd. Winston-Salem, NC 27103 June 2020 | 51

Why Am I Sleepier During Quarantine?

BY BRITTANY M. ORIE LEAK

Of course, being in lockdown, working from home, and even working reduced hours due to this pandemic may equal more sleep, right? But recently, more and more people in quarantine have been feeling sleepier and more drained than they would if they were out working like usual. This is because the activities we engage in during our stay-at-home time take a different toll on our minds and bodies.

Sleeping longer. Staying inside with a drastically different daily schedule (or lack of a schedule) prompts us to sleep longer. It’s easier to give in to sleep when we don’t have early jobs to wake up and punch into, morning errands to go out and run or time anchors, such as picking up your children from daycare or attending a reoccurring social event. This sudden disruption in our daily lives has gotten us mildly disconnected from tangible time, and now we’re floating through the day as though the ticking hands have melted off the clock. Nowadays, because we likely have nowhere to be at 7:30 in the morning, we’ve become prone to rolling over in our beds and returning back to our dreams.

Excessive screen time. Working from home and helping our children (or siblings) with online learning will add on more screen time than we need. Having to stay at home prompts us to become engaged with endless scrolling through TikTok videos, playing games, watching Netflix and Hulu, and FaceTiming…all on our smartphones and tablets. While these incentives are rather rewarding, they can drain our energy and leave us sleepier during the day. It’s also important to know that peering our eyes into these small, bright screens before bedtime leaves us feeling sleepier when we wake up the next day, even if we’ve gotten a full eight-hour sleep!

Eating more. It’s important to mind what we eat during this difficult season. But being homebodies who are surrounded by delicious—and sometimes unhealthy—foods cause us to eat out of boredom. Filling up on the comfort foods and heavy snacking can leave us feeling sluggish.

STAYING ENERGIZED

Reduce screen time. The amount of screen time the average person gets has increased exponentially since this pandemic sprung. Stay-at-home orders in today’s millennial world equal massive screen time. But we must be wise about using our smart devices, even while using Zoom and FaceTime for work and social obligations. Here are some ways to reduce screen time: limit your work-related screen time, avoid watching movies or television in bed, talk on the phone instead of using chat messaging, and take up a new hobby or learn a new skill (now is the perfect time!).

Go outside (if you can). If you live in a safe neighborhood or area, fresh oxygen will greatly benefit your energy levels, moods, and mental state. Hey, with many people staying inside, the air is getting a lot cleaner! You can do something as simple as sit on your front porch or balcony.

Exercise. While many folks are leery about going to gyms lately, it’s always feasible to work out in your living room or in the front yard. Take a walk around your neighborhood or through a safe area in your community (while practicing social distancing and wearing facemasks!).

Energizing foods. Grocery shopping has changed like crazy, but our diets can still be optimal (especially with less meat). Eating feel-good and energizing foods will help us feel at our best during this season. All-natural greens, fresh fruits with vitamin C, vegetables, and whole grains will keep our energy up (and will even make us sleep more soundly).

Get enough sleep (but not too much). There’s so much going on in the world right now, and we are constantly being thrown with mandates from all different directions. It’s only natural that our circadian cycles are being knocked off balance. According to a recent article on sleepfoundation.org, getting adequate sleep begins with creating a sleep schedule and sticking to it. So, setting a wake-up time, a wind-down time, and an actual bedtime is enough to regulate our bodies to get a good night’s sleep and wake up revitalized every time.

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336-766-7440 • www.FraleighsBoutiqueNC.com Monday-Friday 10am-5pm | Saturday 10am-4pm | 2626 Lewisville-Clemmons Rd. Clemmons, NC 27012

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Wake Forest Baptist Health Plastic Surgery | Vest Mill Professional Park | 1450 Professional Park Drive, Suite 300 | Winston-Salem, NC 27103 | 336-713-0255 June 2020 | 53

camel city

BY JULIE FRITZ

Boutique shopping is a specialized experience.

You can feel the personal touch of a shop owner who wants to make sure you have access to something different. The beauty is in the details.

From the design of the shops to the unique pieces within them, boutique shopping is different. There are only so many places where you can get an authentic boutique experience and find a shop owner who handpicks the pieces in their store. At Camel City Boutique in WinstonSalem, that’s precisely what you will find.

Owner Kristen Reid has loved fashion all of her life. For her, it started with a set of fashion plates when she was young. “I had the set

of mix and match fashion plates where I could design a look, use a rubbing crayon to outline the look on paper, and then color it in. That progressed into loving clothing and how it made me look and feel. I always knew I wanted to help other people love their look and help them find the pieces that would do that,” said Reid. When the opportunity to open a boutique in Winston-Salem presented itself, she knew she was ready and that she could bring a unique perspective to fashion in this community. Camel City Boutique opened on February 16, 2019.

When you shop at Camel City Boutique, you are more than just a customer. You become part of the family.

The staff wants to get to know you, your likes, dislikes, what fits you well and what colors you prefer. They take that knowledge and use it to help you find clothes and accessories that bring you joy. Once they get to know you, you will be on their mind as they look for items that will fit your needs and taste to bring into the store.

Camel City Boutique is located at 5009 Country Club Rd in Winston-Salem. They are open Monday through Friday from 10 AM to 7 PM and on Saturday from 10 AM to 4 PM. You can reach the store by phone at (336) 829-5237. For more information or to experience their online shopping options, visit their website at camelcityboutique.com or follow them on FaceBook. You will also find additional information about adjusted hours and shopping protocols as social distancing continues.

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WFBH Outpatient Imaging

We miss you

and can’t wait to see y’all soon!

Like us on Facebook to see our live sales!

camel city Camel City Boutique

Carrying ALL sizes from Extra Small to 3x

336-829-5237 | WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/CAMELCITYBOUTIQUE | 5009 COUNTRY CLUB ROAD, WS 27104

June 2020 | 55

When Everything Changes

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

The past few months have been…interesting. It seems like everyone is weathering the same storm: we might all be in different boats, but we are dealing with some of the most turbulent changes many of us have experienced in our lifetime.

I was talking to a friend the other day, and we were both discussing why this time was so difficult. Yes, change is hard. But this seemed so much harder than normal change, and both of us were good at accepting change! We came to a single conclusion: this is extra hard because it feels like everything changed, and continues to change.

The moving target of getting back to “normal,” what “normal” actually will be, our routines, our interactions, eating habits, sleeping habits – even our bills have changed over the past few months with many car insurance companies charging less or refunding premiums because people aren’t driving!

What a wild time.

No wonder we were spinning! Aside from leaning heavily on friends, family, and therapists, there are a few things you can do for yourself during this time of change when it feels like everything is in motion.

FOCUS ON WHAT IS TRUE AND REAL NOW

One of the best bits of advice I’ve gotten from my therapist has helped me during this time immensely, and I’ll pass it along and save you a copay: focus on what is true at this moment. Ask yourself: what is real right now? What is true?

Do a quick diagnostic: for me, I am healthy, my family is healthy, my dogs are happy, my plants are growing, and I’m getting a decent amount of sleep for the first time in a very long time. What is true and real for you right now?

By grounding yourself in the present, you can start working away from worrying about the future.

WORK ON THE WHAT NEXT, NOT THE WHAT NEXT NEXT

I see this a lot: people are worried about things that are multiple steps down the line. For those things to happen, other things need to happen.

If they don’t, that farther down the line event won’t happen, or won’t happen in the same way that inspires the worry.

Stop thinking about the next NEXT and focus on the next: you can’t even begin to think about something that may or may not happen if you’re not connecting with the most immediate thing in front of you.

My grandmother used to say all the time: don’t borrow sorrow from tomorrow.

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CONCENTRATE ON THE THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL

Now that we’ve (started) to ground our thoughts into reality, it’s time to focus on things you can control.

What are you 100% responsible for? Make a brief list of those things and start to do something about them! This is why a lot of people cut their hair during moments of change: it’s something you can control.

Aside from bangs (please don’t), you can zero in on the things you can control: maybe it’s a book you go to when you’re feeling lost or your favorite movie or a great yoga class. Do the things you can to regain that sense of stability in your life when everything is spinning around you.

FIND YOUR LIGHT

That book you go to or movie you turn on when you’re feeling lost? Tap that and find your light and familiar. Whenever I’m feeling particularly lost, I’ll either turn on or pull out my copy of “Devil Wears Prada” – it’s the one predictable movie and book that won’t make me cry, worry, feel too many feels – and will always make me laugh and feel great.

Whatever your light is, don’t underestimate the power of a good moment. Use it often, and if you have trouble figuring out what that light is, think about the last time you smiled so hard your face hurt.

Start there.

And take care of yourself – always give grace.

Trellis Supportive Care

Novant Health

June 2020 | 57

Making Dollars, Making $ense

What is Your Real Tolerance for Risk?

Securities offered through LPL Financial. Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advice offered through Marzano Capital Group, a registered investment advisor and separate entity from LPL Financial.

BY AL SEYMOUR, CHFC®, CLU®, CRPC®, CASL®, AEP®, CAP®, WEALTH MANAGER

It is not uncommon for an investor’s risk tolerance to be challenged when large market selloffs occur.

During these uncertain times, it is natural to question how your investment portfolio is allocated.

Some questions you may be asking yourself are: What is my downside risk exposure based on my investment blend? How long will my investments stay down before I become overly concerned? Am I willing to take the risk needed to reach my financial goals? At Marzano Capital Group, we lean on technology that we feel helps our clients better understand their true risk tolerance. Riskalyze is a tool utilized in our office, and we strongly feel the program helps our clients more accurately evaluate their tolerance for risk over an extended period of time.

There are many additional questions that are relevant during these market cycles: Are you invested for the long run? Have you considered the opportunities created by market downturns, for instance, buying quality investments at lower prices? Are you aware there are no realized losses unless you actually sell? When will you and your family need income from your portfolio?

Are your expectations realistic in both up and down markets? Has your risk tolerance changed due to large market swings?

These questions are important because they assist your financial advisor in creating a tailored portfolio based on your goals.

Many investors desire the highest returns with the lowest level or risk. Riskalyze and appropriate asset allocation may help with this goal. If you, as an investor, would like to achieve the highest returns in any given market, you may be taking too much risk. On the other hand, if you are not achieving the returns you desire, it may be time to increase your stock exposure.

Sometimes a more balanced

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approach is a good middle ground.

A balanced investment strategy is a method of portfolio management aimed at balancing risk and return.

Such portfolios are generally divided equally between equities and fixed-income securities.

We often talk about asset allocation, but what does it really mean? Investopedia defines asset allocation as an investment strategy that aims to balance risk and reward by apportioning a portfolio’s assets according to an individual’s goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon.

Even if your portfolio is well balanced or well-diversified based on your given risk tolerance, investors will still be susceptible to volatility and downturns in the market. This is normal. We at Marzano Capital Group try very hard as financial professionals to create portfolios that are appropriate for our clients; however, it is not a perfect science.

This is why it is extremely important to ask the questions previously mentioned. As I see it, and often convey to my clients, together, we are a team trying to help you reach your goals and your input is needed.

These periods in a down market are never easy, but historically, markets have recovered. Patience is not easy. Remember, the media’s general advice is not based on knowing the facts about you, your emotions, your goals, or your investments. Reach out to your advisor and share your concerns. It is truly a team effort.

Content in this material is for general information only and not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual. All performance referenced is historical and is no guarantee of future results. No strategy assures success or protects against loss. Investing involves risk including loss of principal.

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June 2020 | 59

Oh-So Refreshing Lemonades

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

Childhood memories in the South are filled with tall glasses of icy cold, sweet lemonade after a day in the summer’s heat.

A little tart, a lot of sweet, and bright notes that deliver a generous dose of vitamin C and pH-balancing alkaline. Next time you make a refreshing glass of lemonade, consider trying out these secret tips and/or a new recipe that’ll keep things interesting.

THE SECRET INGREDIENT Traditional to Moroccan cooking, preserved lemons add a real depth to the classic lemonade flavor. Preserved lemons can be made at home with two simple ingredients: lemons and kosher salt. However, homemade preserved lemons take about 3-4 weeks to become their rich lemony flavor that’ll wow your taste buds.

How do you use them? Make a lemon syrup with the preserved lemons by combining them with sugar and a little water. Allow the syrup to completely cool, usually about 1 hour. Then, stir the syrup into the fresh lemon juice. Pour this tart, sweet lemon juice mixture over sparkling water with a few ice cubes for a perfected lemonade.

While you are waiting for your lemons to preserve, try out another secret ingredient to perfecting lemonade: ripe lemons. Yep, it is that simple! Keep an eye on your lemons every day until they have a nice bright yellow color with no tinge of green. They shouldn’t be too dry nor mushy but give a little when lightly pressed.

TIPS TO EASY LEMON JUICING If you keep your lemons in the fridge, then allow them to come to room temperature before juicing. If you’re in a pinch for time, place the lemons in a large bowl of warm water until at room temperature.

regular lemons will yield approximately 1 cup lemon juice.

Additionally, if you plan on buying a large bag of lemons from the grocery store, consider washing each lemon very well to prevent one from getting moldy and ruining the whole batch.

AMAZING COMBINATION WORTH TRYING

Making simple fruit syrups and purees adds great flavor to a classic lemonade recipe. The best part? You don’t need to adjust the sugar levels since the fresh berries have all their needed sweetness naturally. If using fresh fruit, you may even be able to reduce the amount of sugar added since it will naturally tame the tartness of lemons on their own.

• Mint, Cucumber, and Melon • Mango & Mint with a splash of Lime Juice • Strawberry & Basil • Peaches & Rosemary • Raspberry & Watermelon • Blueberry & Lavender • Coconut & Orange (substitute some of the water with coconut water) • Ginger & Honey (substitute the sugar with honey) • Sparkling Strawberry (create a strawberry fruit syrup to mix with the fresh lemon juice, then stir with sparkling water) • Blackberry • Carrot Lemonade (simply add carrot juice) If you’re on the hunt for a classic lemonade recipe, then look no further! Use this simple lemonade recipe as the base for any creative additions mentioned above. It makes 6 servings.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 c. fresh lemon juice, about 5-6 lemons • 1/3 - 1/2 c. honey, or granulated cane sugar • 5 c. cold water

When lemons are at room temperature, their cell membranes are weakened, which means they are easier to squeeze, and more juices can be extracted. If you want to take it a step further, roll each lemon against the countertop using your palm. Afterward, slice both ends off of each lemon without getting into the juice. Then, cut the lemon in half and juice using a citrus press or squeezer.

INSTRUCTIONS:

A little reminder: Buy a few more lemons than you might think you need to be on the safe side. Keep in mind that 5-6

Let’s turn these tart lemons into golden sweetness that can share an opportunity to spread hope.

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• In a small saucepan over medium heat, whisk together the honey or sugar with 1 cup water until the sweetener has dissolved in the water. Remove from heat and allow to cool completely.

• Add to the freshly squeezed lemon juice and remaining water.

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June 2020 | 61

Decorating With Natural Elements

“A home is an intimate space where we can create a sense of worth, security, and belonging. It should be the place where we go to feel our best, a haven to recharge and rejuvenate. The commitment to reclaim and refine this sacred space and to protect what we hold dear invites us to make choices that change us, and better us, and help us make a positive impact on the world around us.” ~ Melissa Michaels Seeing the world come alive with color is one thing that has brought me peace during the COVID-19 pandemic. If this had to happen, what a beautiful time of year to occur during a North Carolina spring. It has made me slow down and enjoy the beauty of nature around me and most likely it has done that for you also.

Dr. Carla Marie Manly has noted that, “When we are confined indoors, it can be truly important to bring nature into our living spaces as much as possible.” By including plants or elements of nature in your home décor, you are bringing beauty and peace to your home’s interior in an inexpensive and attractive way. Many times you have read in my articles that plants and nature bring life to a room. I know this is so true because often as I am finishing a job, I stand back to see if the design is missing anything. If it is, all it takes is to add a plant or an item from nature and it completes the design.

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Natural Elements to help add life to your interior: • Pick up a bouquet of flowers at the grocery store or from your yard…or order online. Flowers will boost your mood. I have heard them called ‘Vitamin F.’ My ‘Knock Out Roses’ are so beautiful and I picked a small bouquet and placed them in a vase. The roses make me smile each time I walk by them.

• Place a green houseplant in a pretty container on a side table. Google “houseplants that are easy to grow” for suggestions to help you decide which plants to purchase. An added benefit is plants actually improve air quality in your home.

• Plant a terrarium and enjoy it as a centerpiece on your kitchen table.

• Use a pretty ribbon to hang a twiggy or boxwood wreath on a mirror.

• Use art depicting the outdoors to create warmth and interest.

• Let in natural light. Create an open and airy feel by swapping out heavy curtains for gauzy and semi-sheer curtains.

Simply opening the blinds will help also.

• Add coastal elements this summer: a bowl full of seashells, a piece of driftwood….even pictures of family taken at the beach would make a nice vignette.

These are challenging and uncertain times.

This experience we are living through will change us forever. And like Melissa Michaels’ quote, “let’s make choices that change us, and better us, and help us make a positive impact on the world around us.”

• Decorate by adding wood, leather, or rattan as furniture pieces to pull things together.

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winemerchantsbistro June 2020 | 63

The Ultimate Guide to

Sourdough

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

A revolutionary ingredient simply from flour and water.

HOW TO MAKE SOURDOUGH STARTER? Follow these simple instructions:

Day 1: Using a kitchen scale, mix together 50 grams of allpurpose or bread flour and 50 grams of filtered water at room temperature. Transfer the mixture into a jar with a lid and securely close it. Place the sourdough jar in an environment around 70°F for 24 hours.

Day 2: Scoop 50 grams of the sourdough starter from Day 1 into a bowl (discard the remainder).

Feed the sourdough starter by adding the following: 50 grams of all-purpose or bread flour, and 50 grams of filtered water at room temperature. Stir to combine. Place the fed sourdough starter back into the empty jar. Cover and set aside in an environment around 70°F for 24 hours.

Day 3: By now, it may begin to smell a little sour and have a few bubbles (that’s good!). Repeat ALL steps from Day 2 starting with scooping 50 grams of the sourdough out (discard the remainder).

Day 4: Repeat ALL steps from Day 2.

Day 5: Repeat ALL steps from Day 2.

Day 6: Congratulations, you did it!

The starter should be very bubbly, a little funky smelling (a good sour smell) and doubled in volume.

HOW TO MAINTAIN SOURDOUGH STARTER?

Your sourdough starter is alive and hungry when at room temperature or about 70°F; however, it can become expensive to constantly feed. The best method is to place your recently fed sourdough starter in the fridge, taking it out once every 4-5 days to feed it.

Feeding Process: Take your sourdough starter out of the fridge one hour before feeding it. Using

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a kitchen scale, measure out the amount of grams of your sourdough starter. Then, simply feed the sourdough starter by adding equal parts of flour and filtered water at room temperature. For example, if the sourdough starter is 125 grams, stir in equal parts by stirring in 125 grams water and 125 grams of flour.

Allow it to get active once again for 1-2 hours before using.

How do you know when your starter is active and ready to use? Fill a small cup with water. Add a 1/2 teaspoon of starter to the water. If the starter floats on top, then it is good to go! If the starter sinks, then allow it to activate a little longer.

HOW TO MAKE THE BEST USE OF SOURDOUGH DISCARD?

After your fourth day of feeding your sourdough starter, you will no longer need to waste the sourdough discard. Use the portion of the discarded sourdough starter for pizza crusts, pancakes and more.

Adding sourdough starter to your recipes not only helps them become more digestible, but tallies on the live cultures, making your recipes more nutrient-dense.

Did you know that sourdough starters can be passed down through generations? Started before the rotary dial and living through two centuries of wars, Lucille Clarke Dumbrill of Newcastle can trace her sourdough starter back to 1889. Her secret to maintaining a 131-yearold starter? Keeping it stored in a ceramic jar with a lid. And her favorite sourdough recipe to make for her guests? Pancakes!

SOURDOUGH DISCARD PANCAKES Servings: 6 pancakes Total Time: 20 minutes

Ingredients: 1 cup All-Purpose Flour or Bread Flour 1/2 c. Sourdough Starter 3/4 c. Milk 1 large Egg 1 tsp. Baking Powder 1/2 tsp. Baking Soda 1 tbsp. Honey 1/2 tsp. Salt 1 tbsp. Olive Oil

Instructions: 1. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt.

2. Create a well in the center, then add the sourdough starter, egg, milk, and olive oil. Mix until well combined.

3. Grease and heat a griddle to about 300-350 F. 4. Pour the pancake batter on the hot griddle, using 1/4 cup batter per pancake. Once the pancake starts to bubble on top, then flip the pancake to cook an additional 1-2 minutes.

5. Serve warm with maple syrup and fresh berries.

You have added to your professional skills in the kitchen with the countless microorganisms active throughout sourdough, and the layers of aromas it adds to your recipe.

Sharon Reid, DDS, PA & Tyler Wynne, DDS

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Providence Restaurant

June 2020 | 65

BY TARYN JEREZ Whether you invite friends over for a casual game night or coworkers for a dinner party, fumbling for wine glasses, and figuring out what kind of ingredients to run to the store for to make cocktails can be a hassle.

Let’s put an end to that by embracing that 20s style in 2020 by being the perfect hostess with your own bar set up right in your home!

Ginger Beer, Simple Syrup, Bitters, and a few fruit juices like pineapple or cranberry. These will allow you to have several beverage options to offer your guests at a moment’s notice and even dish out an impressive before-dinner cocktail for you and your partner before dinner is ready during the week!

Here are a few simple tips to craft a stocked and chic set-up ready for any shindig or hootenanny that comes your way!

THE GARNISH

THE BAR

Go for something that’s both fully functional and serves as a great decor piece in your home. First thing is to figure out what your needs are for the bar and which space in your home you will be utilizing. Do you have a man cave downstairs that allows for a larger countertop addition with a built-in sink and fridge? Maybe your dining room has the perfect corner for a delicate vintage bar cart on casters you can easily move to a larger room when needed? Also, think about the types of social events you plan to host and the most common headcount you’d be hosting. It’s important to estimate what needs to fit within your home bar ahead of time to avoid having to constantly restock mid-event.

THE ALCOHOL

While variety is important, don’t let anyone give you the impression that the day you set up your home bar is the same day you are fully stocked on supplies. Alcohol can add up quickly and many locations have regulations around how much you can purchase within a given time frame. Give yourself permission to take your time stocking your bar and have some fun in the process filling it with a great assortment. Your basic list may want to include Vodka, Cognac, Gin, Rum, Tequila, Whiskey, and Scotch as well as a few red and white wines. You can also add some great liqueur options such as Amaretto, Irish cream, or Vermouth to your collection. These will provide you with lots of stand-alone options as well as great ingredients for cocktails to enjoy.

THE MIXERS

Speaking of cocktails, you don’t want to forget about mixers! While the cost on these can definitely be more forgiving than the alcohol itself, again, there is no need to overstock too quickly. Take your time learning which mixers are your most loved and best quality and go from there.

A few things to consider adding to your shopping list are Club Soda,

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Can you imagine your cheeseburger without the ketchup and mayo?

How about your nachos without the ooey-gooey toppings? When it comes to crafting the perfect drinks, you definitely don’t want to leave out the garnishes! This is where the flavor really comes through and you get those special nuances that make it stand out. While many garnishes are of the time-sensitive variety with expiration dates close by, they will not only add a great flavor but a beautiful visual touch to your set-up. Gather up oranges, lemons, limes, cherries, and fresh herbs like rosemary, mint, and basil, but be sure to add these ingredients to your list to purchase right before you’ll be needing them.

THE TOOLS

Don’t forget that if you’re ready to channel your inner bartender at home, you’ll need a few essentials to make it happen! There are some basic bar tools to help make your mixed drinks with ease, such as a cocktail shaker, long bar spoon, muddler, strainer, jigger, and of course, some great glassware. Nowadays, a simple Google search can point you in the direction of several stores that sell all-inclusive bar tool sets with everything included. These are also often less expensive; however, quality can sometimes be up for questioning. When it comes to glassware, don’t limit yourself to the one aisle of the store where you’ve purchased everything else. Have some fun and add personality to your home bar by choosing a variety of different glasses from your local thrift store!

THE BEST PART

As much as you may look forward to setting up a special space for entertaining, don’t forget to enjoy it yourself from time to time. Think about the family member who only takes out the fine china for that special holiday meal once or maybe twice a year. Don’t treat your home bar the same! Pour yourself a drink, sit back, relax and, of course, always drink responsibly.

Family Services

June 2020 | 67

A Farmer’s Tale: OCCASIONAL CAKES

BY DAVID WILLARD

What is community? David Spangler says,” Some people think they are in community, but they are only in proximity. True community requires commitment and openness. It is a willingness to extend yourself to encounter and know the other.” Robert Kennedy had an even grander image when he stated his vision of community by saying, “It is not more bigness that should be our goal. We must attempt, rather, to bring people back to the warmth of community, to the worth of individual effort and responsibility, and of individuals working together as a community, to better their lives and their children’s future.”

It is in these views of community that we can see what many in our area already know and put into practice in their own lives, which is that the world is so much greater and our lives so much more plentiful if we “live” in a community and not just a house on a piece of land. In fact, these visions of community can be clearly seen when a trip is taken to a local farmers market. This month’s Farmers Tale focuses in on Robin Ann Westmoreland, as she introduces us to her little corner of the market.

Westmoreland owns and operates Occasional Cakes, a small bakery business that spends its weekends at a local farmers market off Sandy Ridge Road, and loves being part of the community it has created. “I am a mother of two great kids. I am a very people-oriented person, and I love to get out and talk to people, which is why I enjoy going to the farmers market as much as I do. It is a good opportunity to build my clientele up, get my name out there. I get to meet tons of people, which I really enjoy,” says Westmoreland.

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Westmoreland started her baked goods business after deciding it was time to pursue her dream and make her passion her career. “It started out as a hobby, but then I left a retail job of 20 years to pursue my hobby full time, and here we are now. My goal is to one day have a storefront and be able to provide people a place to go and buy fresh baked goods! I have customers that will come every week and get them a cake for the week, so they have dessert,” she continues.

The drive that pushes her to pursue her dream and make it a reality is more than welcomed at the market; it is invited and even cultivated, like all good farms. “It is like a big family at the farmers market between the vendors. We all tell each other where to get certain products that one may be looking for. We all take care of each other and support each other. The customers are all important since most of them are local, and it’s all about locals supporting local businesses,” Westmoreland concludes.

Occasional Cakes and Robin Westmoreland are working, breathing examples of what makes a farmers market so unique and so important. It’s all about small farms and businesses coming together to not only sell their products and goods but also to lift each other and support each other. It is a community working to create even more of a sense of community for all those who stroll booth to booth during shopping hours, hoping to not only find the perfect dessert or tomato, but maybe a new friend that they can see every time they take a trip to their local farmers market.

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Boost Your Brain & Benefit Your Body With Good-Mood Foods

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

You know what they say. . . “You are what you eat,” and as Hippocrates is quoted, “let food be thy medicine, and let medicine be thy food.” What we put into our bodies can affect lots of things, not only how we function physically, but mentally as well. So, what should you eat if you want to boost your brain, benefit your body, and be in a better mood?

OMEGA-3 RICH FATTY FISH

You may already be taking an omega-3 fish oil supplement, but adding more fatty fish like salmon and tuna can benefit your health. In addition to a healthier heart, omega-3 can also be mood-boosting.

Whether you prefer your salmon and tuna raw in sushi or well done (baked, grilled, or cooked in a pan), having fish a few times a week is a good idea. Other good-mood food sources of omega-3 fatty acids include sardines, anchovies, mackerel, walnuts, flax, chia seeds, and cod liver oil.

VITAMIN-D-RICH FOODS

Vitamin D is known as the “sunshine vitamin.” Eating foods with lots of vitamin D can promote a similar kind of mood-boosting effect of a bright, sunny day while providing other nutritional health benefits. Studies have shown that increasing vitamin D intake may boost serotonin, a key neurotransmitter that makes you feel happy, brightening your mood. If you’re lacking in serotonin, you may be more likely to experience mood disorders, including SAD (seasonal affective disorder).

While you can increase your vitamin D levels taking higher dosages of vitamin supplements and with more exposure to the sun (UVB rays), it’s also a good idea to improve your diet with foods that contain vitamin D like fatty fish, cheese, egg yolks, and liver.

FOLATE-RICH FRUITS AND VEGGIES

Avoid depression and an impaired metabolism with fresh fruits and veggies that are ideal sources of folate. Fruits, especially citrus, are rich in folate. Veggies plentiful in folate include avocados, artichokes, okra, broccoli, edamame, spinach, and turnip greens. Also, find folate in legumes like beans and lentils.

PROBIOTIC-RICH FERMENTED FOODS

Good for your gut, fermented foods can help your umpteen trillion friends – beneficial bacteria – survive and thrive. You need them to be healthy and strong to boost your immune system and ward off illnesses. By supporting the growth of these LIVE microorganisms, you can also boost your serotonin levels, enabling that “happy hormone” that can combat depression.

Up to a whopping 90% of your body’s serotonin is produced by your gut’s microbiome. By getting your fermented “fix,” you are doing your health a favor – amping up your defenses against threats like viruses and diseases. Fermenting your own foods (sauerkraut, kimchi, and kefir) and beverages (kombucha) is a process, but a fairly easy one you can do right in your own kitchen.

MODERATE AMOUNTS OF CAFFEINE

Believe it or not, caffeine can be beneficial when it’s not overdone. Caffeine can trigger the release of helpful brain chemicals like dopamine whose role is performance and mood. In a research study, moderate caffeine intake from coffee and tea was found to have a positive, protective impact on decreasing the risk of depression. In terms of teas, black teas generally have the highest amount of caffeine, green teas have less than black teas, white teas have less than green teas, and herbal teas have no caffeine. Overdo it, though, and you may experience some negative side effects like jitters, anxiety, headaches, mood swings, and insomnia.

DELICIOUS DARK CHOCOLATE

You won’t mind this sweet treat on the list of good-mood foods! Yes, you can actually benefit your brain and body with a little dark chocolate. It can be hard to turn this one down, but don’t overdo it, chocoholics! So, what’s the right amount? Generally, one to two squares (70% or more cocoa solids) should do it and should also be enough to sate your sweet tooth!

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Adapting your diet to be more nutritionally beneficial is how you can achieve better health. We can all get healthier, boosting our brainpower, revving up our immune systems, and improving our moods. Your health, wellness, and life can always improve; it’s up to you!

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336.712.0300 | ChristinasDessertery.com June 2020 | 71

I’m Sorry, You’re Wrong Ever have an interaction with a friend, coworker, or acquaintance, and they are just wrong?

It’s not a matter of disagreement or a difference in opinion. The other person is completely wrong and incorrect – factually even! What makes it worse: there is proof that they are wrong, and they keep telling you that they are correct, that you are wrong, and that you just don’t know better. And they offer you information from a known flawed source.

Full stop: this is a hard situation, and while I will often give the “big advice” at the end, I’m going to address it both here and at the end. Sometimes, you have to walk away from a friend, a coworker, or acquaintance. If you’re not ready to end the communication and relationship, keep reading for some ideas on how to have a conversation about this information.

YOU CAN’T CHANGE HOW THEY COMMUNICATE

If someone is set on their opinion and how they are expressing it, you can’t change that.

You actually can’t change how someone communicates: if they are passive, aggressive, or passive-aggressive – that’s not on you to change, and if you try to, you’re going to 100% fail all of the time.

The only thing you have control over is your response.

If you’re pushing for them to communicate this information in a certain way, to listen, to read, and respond in the same way you have, you’re doing it wrong. Think about your response to them. Are you accusing them of something?

Telling them they are wrong? Or are you asking them to do something? Take time to respond versus react. A reaction is unconscious and immediate: it’s often all emotion minus logic and thought. A response incorporates time, logic, thought, and that emotion.

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

AVOID WORDS LIKE BUT – SUBSTITUTE AND

When you’re having this conversation that is full of responses and not reactions, you’re probably thinking more about the words you’re saying when you respond and not just running your mouth.

That happens a lot, right? We go into situations that we feel emotionally tied to and we just talk. Sometimes, after the situation, we regret the things we said or wish we would have said them differently.

This is bound to happen when you’re talking to someone about being incorrect.

One major word swap you can do is an AND for a BUT. The word BUT elevates one thing above another and offers a level of importance to the phrase after the BUT. If you’re saying something like, “But you’re wrong!” you’re elevating your own opinion – what if you say, “But this study shows…” you’re also elevating that sentence and opinion. That elevation is going to cause more conflict.

On the other hand, you can say the same thing with the word AND, and you can add the information you’re looking to add without the elevation. “And have you read this study” sounds a lot less confrontational than, “But have you read this study.”

You’re possibly diffusing the situation and not adding conflict to the situation.

FOCUS ON FACTS NOT FEELINGS This one should be easy, and it’s not. We get highly charged and passionate about the information we believe in – and this can be elevated when someone is telling you that you’re wrong, or when they are wrong and sharing faulty information.

Take a breath, step back, and focus on the facts in the situation and not how you feel.

Our intent and impact in conversations can be elevated by our emotions, and those emotions can trigger more emotions in the other person – which is going to keep ping-ponging back and forth, elevating the issues.

When you’re talking to someone about being incorrect, stick to the facts and try to, at the very least, check your emotions before the conversation.

KNOW WHEN TO WALK AWAY

While I mentioned this in the beginning, it’s important to note again – sometimes, people are going to believe whatever they want to believe. And sometimes, you just have to walk away.

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June 2020 | 73

Aging Gracefully

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

I don’t remember the day, the month, or even the year, but I do remember the moment. A strand of silver, or maybe two, in a sea of long brunette hair. It was not my imagination or the light playing tricks on me. Whoa… already? I peered more closely at my deep-set green eyes, and there it was: the unmistakable suggestion of crow’s feet, confirming that this business of fading youth was already underway.

I have always been grateful for not being burdened with the gift of classic beauty. Attractive enough, well-groomed, and what people refer to as “fit,” I was happy enough with my looks… except for the usual matter of wanting what you haven’t got and musing over what it would be like to have more of this and less of that. Overall though, I was satisfied. I understood – in my head, at least - that aging was an inevitable change. But when it started with those shots of silver and tiny lines, I realized that this was deeply personal. No need to mince words here, it meant the loss of how I knew myself, at least in terms of appearance. Being a planner with a strong penchant for looking ahead, I quickly imagined where this was headed and began to consider how I would absorb its truth into my being.

This matter of our physical being changing of its own, natural accord is a struggle for many women, one we are often conflicted about, and deal with oh-so differently: we admit our struggle readily, or minimize our discomfort, or selectively confide. We look to our mothers, our BFFs, our sisters, friends, co-workers, public figures, celebrities, and strangers for a sense of how they are navigating the same inevitable path. We admire or are jealous. We applaud or judge. We speculate or attempt to copy. We change our minds, ping-ponging from one perspective to another until we settle somewhere. Every one of us strong, capable, fearsome, loving women contend with her own aging.

And yes, to be clear, I am unabashedly talking about the physical stuff.

So I made the decision to age gracefully. If that pronouncement evokes a “Duh” rather than a “Wow,” I totally get it. It’s a tired cliché, a term we use to tell ourselves that it’s “just fine” when it feels “not fine.” But not for me. For me, aging gracefully would mean that I would: Accept the aging process in light of its alternative. I know far too many women and men who died too soon, their beauty intact, but their light gone from this world. If I am given a longer gift of days, then I will take the bags, sags, and other changes in stride.

Reconsider what it means to be beautiful from the inside out. I wouldn’t ignore “the physical stuff,” in an either-or move, but I would also focus on the glow and reach of that inner light. I would challenge myself to see, think, and act in ways that create a more beautiful world.

Evolve my sense of what looks right now. For example, a few years ago, I stopped wearing red lipstick and lowered my hemline. I’ve changed my mind about both. The red is back in my repertoire, and I love to rock an above-the-knee dress...again. My husband once asked, “What happened to your dark brown hair?” and, more recently, “Why don’t you just go gray?”

Well, maybe I will, and just maybe I won’t. I don’t need to know right now.

Refrain from judging the age-related choices of other women. I have friends who started Botox in their 30s and others who let their hair go entirely gray with nary a single color “correction.” I have a friend who had a breast reduction as part of her “Embracing 60” moment, and another considering breast implants in the spirit of “Well hell, why not?”

Their choices are theirs to make, not mine to judge. I think a “You go, girl” is the light-from-within response.

As I age on the outside, I am also aging on the inside in ways glorious and unimaginable. But that’s another article!

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WomanCare

June 2020 | 75

Writers Who Read The New York Times Best Sellers

BY MEGAN TAYLOR When we are looking for something new – whether it is a new book, recipe, or television show, we often look for inspiration and advice from others. One of the best resources for finding new reads is looking through The New York Times best seller list. As I scrolled through the list, I noticed it is full of many categories for all types of readers, including fiction, nonfiction, hardcover, paperback, advice, how-to, children’s, middle grade, business, young adult, and more. This month, I decided to use these suggestions to inspire my highlighted reads. I hope you enjoy!

REFUGEE

EDUCATED

LITTLE FIRES EVERYWHERE

This past spring, I read this book along with my middle school students and I loved it! And so did they. North Carolina author Alan Gratz combines three stories into one novel. Readers meet three refugees from three different time periods, all on a journey to a better life. First, we are introduced to Josef, a Jewish boy living in Nazi Germany during the 1930s. Josef and his family board the MS St. Louis, a ship taking Jewish refugees to a new life in Cuba.

However, things quickly go sour when the ship’s original stop is denied entry and Josef and his family realize escaping the Nazis may not be that easy. Next, there is Isabel who lives in Cuba 1994. With hopes of a new life in Miami, Isabel and her family set sail on a raft. During their journey, conflicts and challenges also come their way.

Lastly, readers are sent to 2015 where Mahmoud and his family lives in Syria. Violence and war are destroying their home forcing them to find a new life in Germany. Refugee provides readers with a story of courage, survival, and understanding the importance of home. In addition, the characters’ stories overlap, forming powerful connections on the reader. This novel is a can’t-miss for all ages.

At the age of seventeen, Tara Westover first set foot in a classroom.

Growing up in Idaho, her family was a group of survivalists, who prepared themselves for the end of the world, and isolated themselves from society.

This way of life meant not receiving a formal education. However, Tara first realized other options were available to her after her brother went to college. This action inspired Tara and eventually led her to attending Brigham Young University. From there, she yearned for knowledge and began studying and traveling throughout the world. In the book Educated, readers are taken on a journey of self-invention and discovery. If you are looking for a novel to inspire and create a change within you, Educated is the perfect read.

Now a popular series on Hulu, the novel Little Fires Everywhere tells the story of two families – the perfect Richardsons and the artistic Warrens – living in Shaker Heights, Ohio. In this town, everyone plays by the rules and lives in an “ideal” world. The two families interact when Mia Warren, a single mother and her daughter Pearl, rent a house from Richardson matriarch, Elena. Throughout the novel, the characters face many struggles as their beliefs about family and ways of life conflict with each other. In addition, readers are given a subplot between the two families when a family friend of the Richardson’s adopt a Chinese-American baby. A custody battle between the baby’s birth mother and adopted family ensues when Mia takes one side and Elena takes the other. Little Fires Everywhere is full of suspense, mystery, and living with the aftermath when a person’s beliefs are challenged.

by Alan Gratz

by Tara Westover

by Celeste Ng

These are just three of the many great reads on The New York Times best-seller list. Looking for more options to read from the list?

Visit nytimes.com/books/best-sellers/.

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EDIBLE FLOWERS - NIBBLE, SIP & SAV OR!

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

Ever given edible flowers a nibble or a sip? Not just meant for beautiful bouquets, some special flowers can be enjoyed in your cooking and garnishing. Give citrus blossoms, clover, daisies, dandelions, hibiscus, honeysuckle, lavender, lilac, mums, nasturtium, pansies, roses, sunflowers, and violets, among others, a try! Carnations, lilacs, and roses all smell lovely and are also edible. Brew, sip, and savor tea made with jasmine, rose, blue cornflower, marigold, hibiscus, or lavender flowers. If you’re a fan of the floral, you’ll love learning more about these edible flowers and what to do with them this summer.

But remember that not all flowers are edible! Some are actually quite poisonous, so double check before enjoying flowers in dishes and drinks. Here are some beauties NOT to ingest: azaleas, wisteria, daffodils, buttercups, and delphinium.

BEAUTIFUL BLOOMS TO EAT & SIP Roses – Known as the queen of flowers, roses add beauty to many foods and beverages. While their scent is more floral, their taste can lean towards slightly sweet and fruity. Try adding pink rose buds and petals to your teas, salads, and desserts. A word to the wise: while all varieties of roses are edible, stick with those that are homegrown and forgo florist roses grown with lots of chemicals. Enjoy those as visual treats instead.

Nasturtiums – These beautiful,

Lavender – One of the most versatile and fragrant of the edible flowers! Lavender may smell like perfume, but it can also complement desserts (shortbread cookies, pound cake, peach cobbler with vanilla ice cream and chocolate cake) and beverages (teas, coffee, cocktails, and mocktails). My latest discovery: lovely lavender in ground coffee combined with honey or orange flavor extract. Totally gourmet!

Zucchini Blossoms – Another

Hibiscus – This ruby-colored beauty is tart, tangy, and rich in antioxidants, and vitamin C. Hibiscus tastes a bit sour like cranberries and is a similar shade. It’s delicious as a tea (try combining hibiscus with lavender and mint) and in mixed drinks (cocktails and mocktails). Decorate your bubbly by dropping the whole flower in your glass and watch it bloom in your beautiful beverage.

Calendula – Marigold, the shade of a sunset, has a saffronlike taste when sautéed in olive oil and is especially tasty with eggs.

Try marigold in omelets, quiche, or devilled eggs.

vibrant, boldly colored blooms are the colors of a sunset – red, orange, pink, and yellow. They have a slightly peppery taste, similar to watercress.

They are loaded with vitamin C and add plenty of color and character to your dishes. Tuck nasturtiums into salads, blend with softened butter, freeze in water to beautify ice cubes, and try a nasturtium vinaigrette.

Nasturtiums can be cooked like spinach and included in a stir-fry.

edible part of the zucchini plant, these blossoms have a subtly sweet flavor and are terrific in Italian dishes. Care for some petals on your pizza? How about with pesto? They are also good with goat cheese and fresh herbs. Try sautéing them with eggplant, zucchini, yellow squash, and minced garlic.

Violets – These beautiful bluish-

purple flowers have a sweet, floral taste and can be candied or added as is to garnish your fav desserts (cheesecake, lemon bars, and chocolate mousse). Yum!

Pansies & Johnny Jump Ups – Pansies have a mild grassy,

herbaceous flavor, and Johnny Jump Ups are a bit reminiscent of wintergreen. They work well atop fruit salads or as a beautiful garnish for cold beverages. Want to delight your guests with some flowergarnished hors d’ouevres? Spread a cracker with cream cheese and top it with a pansy or Johnny Jump Up. Pansies and Johnny Jump Ups make desserts especially exquisite.

Add them as a garnish to ice cream, gelato, or sorbet, along with a sprig or two of fresh mint.

EDIBLE FLOWERS - TIPS & TIDBITS

While you can order some of your edible blooms online, it’s best to grow them yourself. Avoid chemicals and pesticides and opt instead for natural solutions to boost your edible flowers and keep them pest-free and healthy.

The best time to harvest them is in the cool of the morning. Remove the pistils and stamen and rinse the petals carefully as you would any produce.

Enjoy your elegant edible flowers!

78 | ForsythWoman.com

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June 2020 | 79

BY LISA S.T DOSS

Recipe The cultural knowledge of herbs is not entirely lost. Tea drinkers seek warmth through sips to find a remedy for the onset of an ailment or to relax. Once upon a time, herbal lore was instinctual, just like the hand wanders into a cupboard to find oregano written on a glass bottle. The basic knowledge of medicinal plants may still be in our genes, urging to take root and blossom. You, too, can appreciate the versatile quality of herbs by first loving plants, their colors or fragrance. Take it one step further! And, the gardener in you can make teas, salves, tinctures and poultices to promote good health!

Breathe deeply. The intoxicating scent of the rose comprises more than 300 chemical compounds, depending on the specific rose.

Leaning into a yellow rose, you may notice a flavoring of violets, nasturtium and a hint of lemon.

Vibrant orange petals, on the other hand, offer the scent of cloves, violets and fruit due to their mildly sedative properties. To the olfactory receptor, the queen of flowers relaxes the nerves and refreshes the spirit. It’s no wonder the rose is a celebration of beauty and love rather than a source for medicinal health.

AN INFUSION In the early morning, when dew droplets rest on the petals, is the best time to capture the fragrance.

We often think of the combination of rose in warm waters to soak the body; yet, there is another method that can ease heart palpitations and nervous tension, aid digestion and inflammations (gout) or resolve oily to acne-prone skin types. Try making the vitamin-enriched, rose-infused honey.

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A Few Rules:

• Do not attempt with roses from a florist or sprayed with chemicals, pesticides or herbicides.

• Once removing insects, leaves and debris, choose only the best petals for your infusion.

• Start with an eight-ounce jar. If you enjoy honey in tea, drizzled over ice cream or toast, suffer from depression, or enjoy face masks, you may prefer a larger size. (Contact a local beekeeper.

Honey is typically extracted and processed starting in mid-June.)

Recipe:

Fill a Mason jar ¾ full of petals. Use a spoon to compress. Pour raw, unfiltered honey to the fill line. Stir to remove air pockets. Keep the lid tight!

After a few hours, stir! Leave in a warm location for four weeks, and stir occasionally. When you smell a strong aroma of rose, it’s time to strain.

(May need to complete twice.) Press the roses to ensure you retain every drop! When the jar is clear of rose petals, the infusion is ready to use!

MAKING ROSEWATER

During a facial, estheticians often place a refreshing, fragrant product on the skin. Most likely, the hydrating spray was rosewater. With rose petals aplenty, why not take less than one hour to make your own?

In a saucepan, pour three cups of filtered water with two cups of lightly packed petals. Use a small lid to submerge the contents. Over medium heat, bring to a boil; then, allow the flower to steep for 45 minutes.

Strain using a fine sieve. Compost the petals. (You can freeze the rosewater in freezer bags.)

To make the toner, combine ¼ cup of witch hazel, ¼ cup of rosewater and five drops of your favorite essential oil to a small jar or spray bottle based on your application preference. Use the toner morning and night.

GROWING WILD ROSES Throughout the Piedmont Triad, two native, wild species grow – the Carolina and the pasture rose.

Whether appearing in a field or meadow, the pink blooms remain through late summer. Wild roses generally range from two to six feet tall and begin producing scarlet “hips” as early as July.

Tip: Wild varieties are available at nurseries; yet, stay away from hybrids.

PROPAGATION With a handy pair of gardening shears, consider taking six-inch cuttings. Place immediately in water and allow roots to form. Do not give up even when some existing buds or leaves turn brown. Change water frequently!

Many herbalists prefer using the petals from wild varieties to create medicinal concoctions. The untainted, purest form, perhaps, derives from the plant that lacks bright colors and intensely aromatic fragrances. For the lover of the queen of flowers, why not add a wild rose linked to history and lives?

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Ways to Navigate DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS (on both sides!)

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

Difficult conversations are called such for a reason – they are not fun to have. This might be anything from a “Hey, we need to let you go” to “That plan we had didn’t work” to “We need to talk” – and the anxiety and discomfort around them doesn’t always get easier the more you have them.

We’ve been hearing a lot of talk on mitigation over the past few months, and that’s the best strategy for difficult conversations… mitigation. You’re working to lessen the severity, seriousness or painfulness of the difficult conversation. Here are a few tips to make those conversations a bit easier – and much more effective – no matter which side you’re on.

UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION Have you heard of the metaphor of running away from something in the woods? In case you haven’t, think about something chasing you. You keep running and running and running, and you never once look back. That thing chasing you gets scarier and scarier in your mind because you don’t know what it is, so all of that anxiety around it increases.

The moment you turn around, and see what is chasing you, you start to think of plans to get away from that thing.

This happens when we shy away from situations – if we’re avoiding a difficult conversation, we keep building it up. When we finally decide to have it, we get to a place where we work to figure out how to handle it. Look at the conversation that you may or may not be avoiding – take a big step back and work to understand the situation as much as possible. Running from it makes it worse, so schedule time (officially or unofficially) to have the conversation.

LISTEN MORE THAN YOU TALK This is true in most situations: if you listen more than you talk, you’re probably going to be in better shape for all conversation.

This is especially true in ones that are highly emotionally charged. Too often we react instead of responding to people

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and stimulus when we are feeling less than great. That often leads to projection: you’re placing your annoyance or hurt onto that other person.

Use active listening to guide your responses: work to summarize what the other person is saying to you to make sure that you understand their meaning. Listen for bits of information that you can use in your response or a clarifying question, and try to avoid the word BUT. BUT often pits two ideas against one another, and when there is an argument, the last thing you want to do is make it worse by using an inflammatory word like BUT.

IF YOU’RE ON EMAIL, GET IN-PERSON – PHONE, VIDEO OR IN REAL LIFE If the difficult conversation is happening over email, then move to phone, video or real life – as soon as possible. Text and words can be misunderstood – and all of that overthinking around meaning and what someone was “actually” saying – or not saying – can get muddy fast.

If you’re using email, use it to make an appointment to be face to face, as much as possible, and as soon as possible. Stewing on emotions and meaning isn’t good for anyone.

THINK ABOUT THE MIDDLE In difficult conversations, especially arguments and disagreements, someone is almost always going to be disappointed. The best way around massive disappointment from either side of the conversation is to think about the middle – diagnose what you want out of the situation and what they want out of the situation. Then, figure out the middle. What is the outcome that is not perfect for any one person, but falls somewhere between the two?

Start small with these tips and while we can’t guarantee that difficult conversations suddenly become easy, you might find a bit more space to handle things in a way that is a little bit less stressful for all parties, on all sides.

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How to Connect with Emotion-Driven Employees

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

I am a person that compartmentalizes well. I tend to place my personal life in one little box and my professional life in another. Within those two boxes, I have even more boxes. This systematic way of viewing my life allows me, often, to remove emotion from the situation.

NOT EVERYONE IS LIKE ME.

A lot of people are driven by emotions. When I’m teaching communication skills, I teach that there are four main categories in every conversation: who you are, what you want, where you are, and how you feel. That final category, how you feel, plays a massive part in how we take in information and communicate with one another. For some people, this part is harder to contain and control and leads every single decision and moment.

This might sound incredibly familiar to many of you – you might interact daily with emotion-driven employees or coworkers, and you might be a lot like me, a person that can compartmentalize information and stimulus. Here are a few tips to best connect with those folks who are led by emotions:

GIVE THEM SPACE

This tip is especially relevant during times of emotional distress.

Don’t crowd, don’t ask how you can help, don’t overwhelm them with ideas and solutions. Give space for them to process their emotions. If someone is driven by emotions, the likelihood is high that they know how to regulate to some extent or have dealt with moments in the past where they just need space and time to process.

You can do this by physically leaving the situation. You don’t have to make it awkward – just find that exit moment to walk away. You can say you’ll be right back, you can be transparent and say you want to give them a moment to themselves – whatever you say, your intention of giving them some time to themselves will be seen as a welcome gesture.

84 | ForsythWoman.com

READ THE ROOM

My husband tells me this all the time. Take a moment to survey the situation – this might happen even before you give space! If you’re not emotionally driven, you might respond to logic, information, and facts – spend some time collecting those before you even interact with anyone in the situation.

By reading the room, you can both see what may have caused the emotional outburst or reaction and develop empathy in the situation.

Sure, you might not ever completely understand emotional reactions to things that you might normally react systematically or logically. By continuing to do this with emotionally-driven people, you’re developing a greater understanding of the moment and situation – and the person!

This effort won’t go unnoticed and gives you something to do while you’re giving space and executing the next tip.

LET THEM FEEL

One of the worst things you can do when an emotion-driven person is sitting in their emotions? Make them feel like they can’t experience those emotions. When you ask them to “cheer up” or “stop crying” or pull them out of whatever space they are hiding out and experiencing those emotions, you’re preventing them from processing.

How do you feel when someone tells you to stop thinking about something or stop walking through information? Frustrated. Now multiply that by someone who is completely led by emotions, and that frustration becomes completely numbing. Let them go through the emotional ride and say something like, “Let me know what I can do” or “Follow up with me tomorrow.” Both of those statements give time to process.

Above all, remember that you can’t change how someone else communicates – only how you respond to them.

31, 2020

4th Annual

EZRA GOLDBACH FOUNDATION GOLF TOURNAMENT Friday, July 31, 2020

Ezra Goldbach’s family and friends are honoring his life by having the 4th Annual Golf Tournament in his memory at Pilot Knob Park Country Club in Pilot Mountain.

We are excited to see everyone again this year and welcome anyone that hasn’t played before to join us!

Ezra Goldbach Foundation

Each year a scholarship will be awarded to an upcoming college student with academic merit that has goals for a brilliant future and has played on the high school golf team. In addition, The Ezra Goldbach Foundation has donated to many other local charities and underprivileged families throughout the community. Each year we have a goal to reach out and to help a school or family with needs.

Please mark your calendar for Friday July 31st for a fun day of golf in Ezra’s memory!!!

There will be lots of food and hydration available! Prizes and giveaways too! All this and the incredible golf at P.K.P . We thank everyone in advance for being a part of this awesome day!!

DATE: FRIDAY, JULY 31, 2020 TIME: 8:30 & 2:00 SHOTGUN START FORMAT: CAPT. CHOICE/SCRAMBLE TEAM: (4) PERSON COST: $75.00 per person; GOLD, SILVER, BRONZE and TEE SPONSORSHIPS available. LUNCH: WILL BE SERVED FROM 1:00 – 2:00

For additional information see Ezra Goldbach Foundation Golf Tournament on Facebook or email ezragoldbachfoundation@gmail.com June 2020 | 85

Learn to Respond Instead of React

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

How many times have you looked back on a moment and said, “Yikes! I wish I had thought about what I was going to say or at least taken a beat before saying something I now regret…”?

Reacting and responding are very different – and the former is often difficult, especially in our “on-demand” world. Reactions are generally very quick. They are often done without thought, emotion-driven, tense, and aggressive. A response is generally less threatening: you’ve given the emotion some time to process, you’ve waded through the aggression and pain that usually accompanies the lash-out of reactions. The thing to remember: reactions generally lead to more reactions, leading to aggression, and nothing of consequence even accomplished.

When you do something without thinking, you’re letting the unconscious handle everything. It’s in the moment, without regard to the long term effects – and it’s a defense mechanism. Responses involve both the unconscious and the conscious – you’re thinking about the now and the future, all at once, and making an informed decision. How can we start responding more than reacting, especially in times of stress and anxiety when our “fight” response kicks in?

TAKE A BREATH

When it’s your turn to talk, and you’d like to respond instead of reacting, you need to take a breath before speaking. That silent pause and moment will allow you to realize if you say something right now, you will be reacting. Give yourself a moment to catch up and check in with your breath.

GO BIG PICTURE

How does this moment fit into your entire life? What would reacting do for that bigger picture? Would it put something in jeopardy? Use that silent “take a breath” moment to put things in perspective.

OPTIONS?

One of the best ways to ensure that you are responding instead of reacting?

Look at your options and make a choice. Reacting is unconscious, remember?

By weighing those options and looking at more than one, you’re going to decide on what you’d like to say. That is choosing to respond versus letting yourself simply react.

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GETTING EMOTIONAL

It’s impossible to remove emotion from the situation. It is possible to make the assertive statement of “I feel” and check-in with how you feel at the moment. Are you angry, frustrated, or annoyed? Negative emotions tend to lead to reactions that might not be the best choice, especially when you’re looking at the situation from a distance.

Consider how your emotions are coloring your response and bring in a bit of logic. The best decisions come from a place of emotion and intent, with a side of logic.

LOOK FORWARD TO LOOK BACK

Go a week into the future. Will what you want to do at this moment seem like “too much” or feel like an outburst more than something that requires thought and reflection? You’re probably leaning towards reaction.

Take some time and step back to think about what you want to think about the situation in a week.

ASK FOR TIME

If you know that you are too hot for the moment – like your emotions can’t allow you to respond thoughtfully, you’re too close to the situation, or you’re too upset to reflect – then say you need some time to think about the moment and your response. Use phrases like “Let me think about things” or “I need a few moments to process,” then take that time to center your response on the moment and how you want things to look in a week.

Sometimes walking away from the situation is the best response – especially if it grants you the space you need to not react at the moment.

Photo Artistry by Melinda

June 2020 | 87

Fluffy Homemade Waffles with Strawberry Sauce

BY SARA WILES

INGREDIENTS For the waffle:

2 cups flour 1 tablespoon baking powder ½ teaspoon salt 2 tablespoons sugar 2 eggs, divided into egg whites and yolks 1 2/3 cup milk 1/3 cup butter, melted

For the strawberry sauce:

1 tablespoon lemon juice ½ teaspoon unflavored gelatin powder 1 lb. fresh strawberries (or frozen) 1/3 cup granulated sugar

DIRECTIONS Preheat waffle iron according to your manufacturer’s directions.

Place flour, baking powder, sugar and salt in a bowl. Whisk to combine. In a small bowl, mix egg yolks, milk and butter. Set aside.

In a separate bowl, beat egg whites with a mixer on high speed until stiff peaks form.

Add egg yolks to flour mixture and stir to combine. Gently fold in egg whites.

Drop by large spoonfuls onto greased waffle iron, close the lid and let cook for roughly 3 to 5 minutes.

For the strawberry sauce, combine lemon juice and gelatin; mix to dissolve gelatin. Set aside.

In a medium saucepan, combine strawberries and sugar. Place over medium-high heat and bring to a boil, stirring occasionally. Reduce heat to medium-low and simmer 8-10 minutes.

Add the gelatin mixture and stir to combine. Continue to simmer, stirring occasionally for 5-7 minutes more, or until sauce is thickened. Remove from heat and let cool to room temperature.

Top waffles with strawberry sauce and dust with powdered sugar (optional).

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June 2020 | 89

Memorabilia Mirror

BY JEAN MARIE JOH

NSON

Many years ago, while clearing out a storage space I shared with my first husband, I took one look at “my” things, turned my back, and walked away. It was a dark time, and I simply didn’t have the emotional strength to separate the wheat from the chaff. That memory, a still shot from a long-ago chapter, evokes one prevailing emotion: sadness. Gone was my wedding album, my high school yearbook, my college literature texts, and who knows what else. I would have tossed most of it, eventually, but that’s not the point. By leaving everything behind, it was as if I was invalidating my life and a good part of myself - to freeze the pain.

Fast forward to the present: I don’t hoard. I do manage clutter.

And yes, I hold onto things.

There’s a secret, hidden spot in my home where I keep “the treasures of myself.” A humble 1940s cake tin, seemingly “trash-worthy,” is a capsule of varied experience and sentiment - faded Polaroid photos, a line of script from a grade school play, a braided bracelet from a junior high school “boyfriend.”

There are also the letters – cathartic and never mailed. These treasures, which somehow escaped the ill-fated storage space, go back decades, and thereby tell my story in a way that only I can understand. It’s amazing how a mere cake tin can only hold so little, and yet, hold so much. I reach for the memories with a sense of peace, revisiting the journey I’ve been on and making sense of its later chapters through the lens of the girl, the teenager, the daughter, the young professional, the young wife, that I have been. It is a healthy “holding on.”

Over the years, I’ve selectively held onto other things: cards, letters, notes, and small, symbolic gifts from my sister, close friends, co-workers, and employees who reported to me. When my self-esteem takes a hit, or I’m simply feeling off-center, I go there. It’s a mirror, and most of what I see there reminds me of what is best and true about me. I read words of gratitude, smile at over-the-top adjectives, and appreciate the outpouring

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of love. But because it’s a mirror, an accurate reflection, there is more to see. A hand-written note says, “I know you’re busy.

Please let me know when you’ll have time…” reminding me that I sometimes put “the practical” ahead of “the important.”

Writer and culture commentator Maria Popova observes that, “Friends hold a mirror up to each other; through that mirror they can see each other in ways that would not otherwise be accessible to them, and it is this mirroring that helps them improve themselves as persons.”

I like how Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, a distinguished professor of psychology, talks about “things”: “the object is simply a bridge to another person or to another feeling.” That “bridge” is accessible to me at all times because I have held on to the things that reflect who I am and who I have been. Culturally, we tend to minimize the significance of “things” because they are often associated with materialism and status-seeking. Or, we talk about things having mere “sentimental value.” Let’s not oversimplify. Those select, relatively few things that you hold onto can serve you by helping you to: • Connect with a positive memory or relationship • Stand up to your inner critic • Remember who you really are • Strengthen your sense of self and purpose • Tap the courage to be who you are The next time your self- esteem takes a hit, or you have that gnawing feeling that you’ve lost your way, resist the lure of a quick-fix distraction. Instead, seek out the things you hold onto.

Let them work with you and for you. Then, just as a mirror has two sides, the other side of holding on is knowing when to let go. Every year, right after the holidays, I engage in a ritual of sending-off, deciding what stays a while longer, and what goes.

With a smile or even a hug, I thank the latter for reminding me of who I am, and then, with a peaceful heart, I let them go.

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LATORIA GAITHER

Latoria Gaither is a professional house cleaner with Two Maids and a Mop as well as a mother of eight children. She is described by her boss as self-driven and a very hard worker. She is very outgoing and establishes rapport with her customers easily. Latoria is very detail-oriented and always strives for excellence. In her time with the cleaning service, she has developed long-lasting relationships with her Cleaning for a Reason customers and has truly made a huge impact on their lives.

She is able to cope with anything thrown at her like a champ!

LAURA EVERETTE

Laura Everette is a professional house cleaner with Two Maids and a Mop. She earned her GED degree before going to work for the home cleaning service. She is considered by her boss as a go-to to get things done! There is nothing she won’t do when asked. She is very driven and self-motivated and will always deliver excellent results. Laura is considered to be very wise beyond her years and it shows in her work. She is reliable, trustworthy and loyal; three attributes that make her an exceptional employee. She is a new employee trainer and is able to communicate effectively to get her point across. Her customers always look forward to her cleanings because of their consistency. She is a single mom but never lets that slow her down; a very strong woman! In her spare time, Laura enjoys reading.

CHRISTY BENNETT

Christy Bennett is a professional house cleaner with Two Maids and a Mop. After being out of the work force to raise her children, she returned with a vengeance!

She is very outgoing and very kind.

Christy is also very considerate of her customers’ desires. She is able to work with everyone without issue.

Her words are always kind, and she’s definitely self-motivated. She is very efficient, and her customers recognize her efforts and desire to please them. She has grown not only as an employee but as an individual. In her spare time, Christy loves spending time with her family and friends.

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JESSICA SMITH

Jessica Smith is a clinical supervisor at Salem Plastic Surgery. She has successfully on-boarded and trained several new operating room RN’s and built a cohesive and happy team, as well as overhauled surgical inventory flow. She worked full time at Salem Plastic Surgery while she earned her RN degree at Surry Community College. Her job performance during that time never faltered and, in fact, it helped her develop her time management and decision-making skills.

Jessica is a natural leader and shows an amazing level of empathy and excellent judgment when dealing with patients and staff. In her spare time, she likes spending time with family, friends and her dogs.

SAYLA NEDELL

Sayla Nedell joined Pretty In Pink Foundation as the Business Development Manager for the Triad Region in 2019. In her role, Sayla focuses on raising funds for economically disadvantaged breast cancer patients, allowing them to get necessary medical treatment without feeling financial stress. Upon graduating from Meredith College with both her BS and MBA, Sayla called the Triangle home before moving back to Winston-Salem to be close to family. After a successful career in telecommunications, Sayla spent time in the Winston-Salem/Forsyth County Schools System. With a passion for helping both individuals and organizations reach their full potential, Sayla uses her unique skill set to organize fundraising and community outreach initiatives. Sayla attributes Pretty In Pink’s success to strong and continued support from the local community. When Sayla isn’t working, she enjoys spending time with her family outdoors.

Blessed with a green thumb and a knack for cooking, she often uses her own herbs and vegetables when making meals.

If you are interested in submitting yourself or someone you know for a future Woman on the Move profile, visit our online application link – Women on the Move (WOM...tinyurl.com/ForsythWomanWOM).

June 2020 | 93

BY TARYN JEREZ OF ONECRAFTYMISS.COM

Making the Quick Switch to Virtual Selling (What Nobody Tells You)

This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

Now more than ever, those who are using a virtual platform for selling their products and services are thanking their lucky stars. So, what about those who are finally looking to turn to the dark side by going digital?

We’ve seen retail spaces and restaurants shut down, social celebrations canceled and fairs, festivals, and trade shows removed from the calendar for the foreseeable future. The fact is that even this month, there are new challenges being faced by many of us in our personal lives and businesses. In this ever-changing Coronavirus filled world, if you’ve been on the brink of exploring virtual selling, you can bet your bottom dollar that making the push to move forward into an online space is going to be one of the best decisions you’ve made recently for your business.

THE TRUTH ABOUT THE QUICK JUMP TO VIRTUAL BUSINESS

“It’s going to cost a lot of money that I can’t afford to invest right now.” This is one of the biggest assumptions small business owners have about making the transition to online selling and let me assure you, this is a lie. The biggest investment you need to make during this season in your business is a shift in mindset. If you can lean into your creativity by shifting your mindset to new opportunities and reminding yourself that you are more in control than you realize, then you don’t have to spend a ton of money and time you may not have right now. Scout’s honor!

BOOST SALES AND KEEP YOUR DOORS OPEN (EVEN IF THOSE DOORS ARE FIGURATIVE)

Making the move to selling online will not only help you during Coronavirus craziness but in the long term as well. This will allow you to expand your reach to so many more people than you ever could in person.

Just imagine the opportunity to engage your existing customers and inspire new shoppers as well! It will also allow more flexibility with your offerings and your time, and can even put an ease on some of your physical demands.

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GET ORGANIZED AND BE SELECTIVE ABOUT WHAT YOU OFFER AND WHO IT’S FOR It can be easy to want to jump right in without taking time to really think about your sales strategy ahead of time, but that little bit of planning will help you be more successful when making the virtual switch!

Be selective and know what works for your business virtually and what doesn’t.

If you sell physical products, understand what items are feasible to deliver locally or ship out based on their size, weight, fragility, and packaging needs. Make sure to review your inventory and assess whether you have enough quantity to sustain what you’re selling. Do you have a plan for fulfilling your orders? What about calculating shipping before you set your shipping rates?

If you sell services, it’s important to be inventive and extra selective with what you’re offering! What can you update to fit the virtual need and what can’t you? Focus on what your audience will find the most value in, especially in a season like this! If you’re stronger at closing deals in person, think about scheduling virtual consultations over video so you can be face to face. If you are adding online courses or events, make sure to take time to explore which platforms your customer will access your service: Zoom, Facebook Live, downloadable PDF, etc.

DON’T BITE OFF MORE THAN YOU CAN CHEW, BUT GET STARTED

Hiring a talented web designer or graphic artist is a wonderful investment and building a new website with an e-commerce platform can certainly grow your business, but guess what? You aren’t limited to those choices just to get started selling online! Did you know that 62% of smartphone users have made a purchase on their phone in the last six months?

That tiny computer that’s in your hand all day can be a huge resource!

You can begin selling online through your website if you have one or a third party like Facebook, Instagram, eBay, Amazon, Shopify, and others. Dive into your social media and create posts and stories marketing what you’re selling and offer sales, incentives, or create special packages you haven’t offered before. If you already have an email list (even if it’s only ten customers), you can sell to them via email!

Offer payment options like PayPal and Venmo just to get started and make it easy.

Embrace whatever you have at your fingertips and think outside the box of your usual sales tactics!

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June 2020 | 95

How to Make Food Last Longer

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

Did you know that Americans tend to throw out 14% of the food that they buy each year, not counting leftovers and cooking scraps? Whether you’ve hit the weekly sales and bought too much of a good thing or you’re stocking up, keep in mind these handy tips to extend the life of the items on your grocery list.

FUNDAMENTAL TIPS FOR FOOD-SAVING HABITS

1. Use a thermometer to ensure that your fridge is always at the right temperature. The Food and Drug Administration recommends fridges being at or below 40 degrees Fahrenheit, and freezers being at or below zero degrees. This is key to preventing food spoilage.

2. Consider planning a few meals for the week in advance to better assess how much of each ingredient is necessary. Becoming a better meal planner will help prevent over-purchasing ingredients that’ll go to waste.

3. Organize your fridge and pantry to showcase all ingredients so that nothing gets lost in the back, eventually becoming spoiled.

THE PANTRY

Generally, dry goods can be stored in a cool, dark place for up to six months (sometimes even longer). However, once the packaging has been opened, it is best to transfer the remaining substance to an air-tight container to ensure freshness. Additionally, nuts and spices are best kept in the pantry, also in air-tight containers, to maintain their moisture levels.

Why should your spices always live in the pantry?

Humidity, light, air, and heat are your spices’ worst enemies. Similar to keeping any nuts in their shell, try to buy whole spices which can be kept for up to two years. If you seem to be in a crunch for time more often than not, or enjoy the simplicity of ground spices, just make a reminder to refresh them every six months.

THE COUNTER

As we move into the summer, apples can be a nutritious and delicious snack to keep around. So then, consider putting any apples uneaten after seven days into the fridge. Before the seven-day mark, place the apples in a large bowl separate from any other produce. The ethylene gases that are produced by apples can make other counter-friendly produce, like carrots, more bitter.

However, if you are in a rush to ripen plums or pears this autumn, keep an apple nearby for 24-48 hours. Vine-ripened tomatoes, winter squashes, potatoes, bananas, melons, and citrus are best left on the counter, as well. Once these fruits and vegetables have been sliced, seal them in an air-tight container and store them in the fridge to keep them from drying out. Another little tip is to wrap the crown of the banana bunch tightly with plastic wrap to help stop the ethylene gas from ripening the bananas too quickly.

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Now, let’s move on to our favorite kitchen essential: baked goods. Did you know there is a science behind storing bread at room temperature? By tightlywrapping up your bread in foil or sealing it in a Ziploc bag, you are slowing down its retrogradation, which is the process of the natural starch molecules crystallizing.

It is best to enjoy your bread within two days or pop it into the freezer for up to 2-3 weeks before it begins to absorb the odors from other frozen ingredients. Before freezing, add one of those bread slices into your bag of cookies to keep them soft and chewy!

THE FRIDGE

Did you know that your fridge has different zones? The cold zone is typically in the very back of both top and middle shelves, while the moderate zone is towards the front. The humid zone is generally those handy drawers that are marked for fruits and vegetables. With this in mind, keep your milk gallons fresh longer by placing them in the cold zone towards the back.

From cakes to frittatas to stir fry, eggs can be an essential ingredient for many families. One of their wonders includes their long-lasting life of up to five weeks. After that five-week mark, extend their life by one more week by hard boiling them. Furthermore, give your fresh berries a quick dip in a homemade wash of one part vinegar to three parts water, drain them, and then thoroughly dry them before putting away.

This kills spores and bacteria that’ll turn them to mush.

With these few tricks up your sleeve, you’re bound to have an organized kitchen to cook your best meals yet!

Ready to Take Your Creative Business to the Next Level? Let’s do it together!

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I help Makers and Creatives have the confidence to go after what they want in their business and make more money doing what they love. Through one-on-one coaching and personalized strategy sessions, we’ll work together to help you get clear in your vision and accomplish your goals. Let’s give your customers a business they can’t get enough of!

If you’re ready for clear action steps, honest mentorship and fierce accountability this is for you!

Sign Up Now for Your Free Connection Call www.onecraftymiss.com/coaching

Taryn Jerez | Taryn@onecraftymiss.com | One Crafty Miss, LLC www.onecraftymiss.com @onecraftymissblog

@One Crafty Miss

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Propane refilling station | A/C & Auto Repair State Inspections | U-Haul Rentals | 24 hour Towing June 2020 | 97

Be Gone, Grammar Trolls!

BY DEBBIE BARR Are you a grammar nerd? Before you answer, it’s important to proclaim that there is a big difference between a grammar nerd and a grammar troll.

Unfortunately, some grammar nerds devolve into grammar trolls. This going over to the dark side is not a good thing. Grammar trolls are the bad guys.

Grammar nerds are the good guys.

But what exactly is a grammar troll? The experts at Grammarly.com say there is a right way and a wrong way to respond to the grammatical errors of others. Grammar nerds, the good guys, call attention to mistakes in a way that is respectful, polite, and appropriate. Their motive is to be genuinely helpful.

Grammar trolls, the bad guys, flag the same mistakes, but in a way that is sarcastic, rude, mocking, and/or insulting. They demean the person who made the error instead of simply correcting the mistake. Brittany Ross, who blogs for Grammarly.com, says that grammar trolls “do what they do because they feel smart when they shame others.” They’re not really defending the English language; they’re trying to puff themselves up.

To these people, Ross says rather bluntly, “Misspelling a word, making a grammatical error, or even writing a sentence that’s hard to understand doesn’t make you stupid. But insulting someone for making a mistake does make you a grammar troll. And a jerk.”

The English-speaking world needs and even reveres its grammar nerds—the people who can explain to the rest of us the difference between an em dash and an en dash and when to use them. They know when to use affect or effect and between or among. They never confuse “its” (the possessive) and “it’s” (the contraction of “it is.”)

They even enjoy a unique genre of humor: The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense. Perhaps the biggest test of grammar nerdery, however, is this: grammar nerds have a strong opinion about the Oxford comma and they will vigorously defend it.

(If you don’t know what the quibble is all about, you’re definitely not a grammar nerd.)

Grammar nerds make the best editors and proofreaders, for one thing, because they’re skilled at using punctuation appropriately.

They are vigilant about the placement of commas, apostrophes, and semicolons, knowing that their misuse can actually change the meaning of a sentence. Consider, for example, how meaning changes along with the placement of even the lowly hyphen: She will work twenty four-hour shifts.

She will work twenty-four hour shifts.

She will work twenty-four-hour shifts.

Really good grammar nerds don’t get so lost in the details that they lose sight of the big picture—the intended message. Clearly, there aren’t enough “big picture” grammar nerds in the world. If there were, humorous flubs like these would never see the light of day: • A Tails magazine cover caption beneath a photo of Rachel Ray and her dog: Rachel Ray finds inspiration in cooking her family and her dog.

• A political poster: We plan to cut all homeless people in half by 2025 • A Goodwill sign: Your Donation Just Helped Someone. Get a Job. • The Alameda Sun (California) newspaper: City Manager Tapes Head to District Attorney

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Ross and her coworkers at Grammarly are about as pro proper grammar as it gets. But the organization is adamant that no one should be hurt or shamed for poor grammar or making a mistake. After all, they point out, some people are not native English speakers and may just be learning the language. Others have disabilities that hinder their ability to type or write.

Their advice to grammar trolls, and by extension to all of us as well, is, “BE NICE. Don’t be rude. Don’t be mean. Don’t be condescending. Just be nice. Tell someone about the mistake if it’s important, and if it’s not, let it go.”

In other words, kindness always trumps good grammar. So be gone, grammar trolls!

Sources: Brittany Ross, “It’s Time to End Grammar Trolling,” grammarly.com/blog/stop-grammar-trolls/ “Happy National Grammar Day! Are You a Grammar Troll?” freelancewritinggigs.com/2017

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June 2020 | 99

Goodbye, Loneliness!

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

There’s no medication or magic bullet for it and loneliness can happen to anyone at any time, however briefly or chronically.

Feeling alone can leave you feeling sad and depressed. So, how can you cure loneliness?

There are lots of options and solutions to help lessen and limit loneliness.

Certainly, loneliness is common when it comes to social distancing and quarantine during COVID-19 (Coronavirus). Limiting contact with people and not being able to interact with anyone in person can be both difficult and frustrating.

However, there are ways of getting connected and maintaining contacts. So much is available online to help you stay in touch, engage in unlimited learning, and stay endlessly entertained. Take advantage of Google and do searches about work, hobbies, people, places and things, and YouTube – the second largest search engine – can occupy your mind and your time. You can fend off those awful siblings: boredom and loneliness.

You’re not alone, and you always have your phone. All of your fav people are just a phone call, vid chat, text message, and email away. You may not have a lot to say, but you can stay in touch. People love to hear from you as much as you love to hear from them.

Tired of social media? Take a break and connect with personal contacts you are closest to. Define your people priorities. Put your family first, then your friends, then your co-workers, then your acquaintances. Let those you’re close to know how much you care and how special they are to you. They may reach back and return the compliment.

Make the most of your time and shift your focus to helping others. There are multitudes of volunteer opportunities you can engage in, both locally and globally (online). Research non-profits and charitable organizations, then make positive connections and build healthy relationships.

Sharing the experience of supporting others can promote bonding. Some even meet the love of their life volunteering. Giving back attracts quality people with big hearts who want to make a positive difference and make this world a better place. Even if you don’t meet Mr. Right at your local soup kitchen or animal shelter, you will probably make some new friends.

Following your dreams, pursuing your passions, and working on your goals can help you achieve a sense of purpose. The more you focus on who and what you love, the more love you will attract and exude. You will resonate with positive energy. And, the more good you put out there, the better you will feel, and the more good will come back to you. It’s an upward spiral, so much better than a downward spiral! Stay connected with your loved ones, keep your mind uplifted and your spirits high. It’s up to you what you fuel up on. If you’ve had enough dark, discouraging news, flip to comedy or food channels and watch something that makes you laugh and puts a smile on your face.

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Do more of what you love. Feeling lonely is a good time to embark on hobbies and excel at them. If you’re an aspiring actor, make a list of your favorite actors and actresses and films you haven’t seen. Get watching and learning. Take online courses and tutorials and practice monologues. You can also write your own. If you always admired Julia Child’s wonderful ways with eggs and have been amused by her voice and mannerisms, watch your fav cooking shows and flip through recipes and cookbooks.

And it’s important to remember that just because you may physically be alone doesn’t mean you’re alone spiritually. God and Jesus are always with you and love you more than you can imagine. Other people are with you in spirit, too. Remember the people who love you - let them cross your mind, be in your prayers, and have a special place in your heart.

There is always a solution to being lonely. No matter how lonely you feel, you are not alone, and you can always do something good and positive to remedy loneliness. Do all you can, be all you can be, and keep on moving forward and living on.

Winston-Salem Dash

June 2020 | 101

Stop Complaining! (It rewires your brain!)

BY DEBBIE BARR

For several years now, scientists, social psychologists, and career coaches have been taking a closer look at the impact of complaining. Everyone complains to some extent, of course. But for some, complaining becomes chronic, a daily habit. What has been coming to light is that too much complaining (or “venting” as many prefer to call it) has some surprising consequences. Our bodies, brains, relationships, and careers can all be negatively impacted by habitual complaining. In other words, chronic complaining just isn’t good for us.

Chronic complaining “rewires” the brain.

Repetitive behaviors like habitual complaining cause the brain’s neurons to branch out toward each other, making the signal pathways easier to travel. Repetitive complaining reinforces the brain’s pathways for these messages. The neurons learn to anticipate complaining, so they construct a “bridge” to carry complaint messages more efficiently. This makes it easier for someone to continue complaining. While the brain is trying to be helpful and more efficient, this “rewiring” isn’t actually helpful. Complaining has a surprisingly negative impact on other aspects of health and life, such as:

PHYSICAL HEALTH The emotions generated by complaining stimulate the release of cortisol, the “fight or flight” hormone, into the bloodstream. This puts chronic complainers at increased risk for elevated cholesterol, a weaker immune system, higher blood pressure, obesity, strokes, heart disease, and diabetes. Most of us would never imagine that habitual complaining could have such a dramatic impact on the body, but, over time, it does.

BRAIN HEALTH According to research done at Stanford University, complaining shrinks the part of the brain known as the hippocampus. That’s the brain structure we’ve heard so much about in the context of the forgetfulness of Alzheimer’s disease. There are two hippocampi, one in each temporal lobe of the brain (the area just above your ears on both sides of your head.) The hippocampi play an important role in learning, memory, spatial navigation, and problem-solving.

Long-term complaining may put those functions at greater risk.

RELATIONSHIPS The brain contains special neurons that enable us to feel empathy for others. These are the mirror neurons. These neurons allow us to “try on” and walk in another person’s shoes and understand their grief or their joy and empathize accordingly. Empathy is a good thing—until your brain begins to mimic another person’s complaints and negativity. (If you tend to complain a lot, give serious thought to how you are impacting the happiness of the people around you.)

CAREER Career coach H.V. MacArthur has observed that “people get into the rut of constantly complaining” about their job situation “without feeling empowered or responsible to do anything about it.” Other career experts point out that complaining can be purposeful and effective if the complaints propel us toward solutions. But ironically, habitual complaining can steal the emotional energy that is necessary for making the positive improvements you want to see.

WHAT’S THE CURE? How can chronic complainers break the habit?

Here are three ideas: 1. Refocus Your Emotional Energy Career coach Stella Grizont defines complaining as “taking an observation and adding negative energy or emotion to it.”

This inclination to add negativity is universal; everyone does it to some extent. Even the Bible acknowledges our tendency to gripe, and, because it’s not good for us, it urges, “Do everything without complaining...”

(Philippians 2:14 New Living Translation).

If you find yourself complaining about the same thing over and over, take a deeper look

inside: what is the situation challenging you to do? Do you need more education to move ahead in your career? Do you need to have an honest conversation with your spouse?

Figure out how to pour your energy into seeking solutions instead of into complaining.

That said, here’s an uncomfortable truth: not everything is under your control. In the words of Viktor Frankl, “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Maybe that’s your challenge.

2. Surround Yourself with Positive People There is no doubt that we are greatly influenced by the company we keep. If you surround yourself with positive people, your mirror neurons will reflect their positivity and solution-oriented thinking. Chances are, you’ll soon find that you’re complaining less.

3. Practice Gratitude In the words of career expert Thomas Oppong, “...an attitude of gratitude can significantly reduce your stress hormone.

When you feel like complaining, shift your attention to something that you’re grateful for, especially if you are in no position to change it. Think of what a privilege it is to be alive, to think, to enjoy, to love, etc.” That’s great advice for all of us.

Sources included: 1. H.V. MacArthur, “Hate Your Job? Stop Complaining and Take Action,” forbes.com | 2. Travis Bradberry, Ph.D., How Complaining Rewires Your Brain for Negativity, talentsmart.com | 3. Thomas Oppong., “Complaining rewires your brain to make future complaining more likely,” The Ladders.com/career-advice. Feb 12, 2020.

102 | ForsythWoman.com

iHeart Radio

June 2020 | 103

Build Your Power of Persuasion

BY JEN OLENICZAK BROWN

Persuasive speaking, and techniques, apply to all fields and careers, as well as life. I think some people think that the skillset in persuasive speaking is only helpful to people in sales or marketing, maybe in small businesses or larger corporations. Persuasion is simply getting people to do or believe something. You might want to convince people to care about a cause, do an action that helps the safety and well-being of others, or change a current behavior. This applies to all careers and paths, so building your persuasion skills is something to do now, versus waiting for when you need it. Here are a few tips for tapping into the power of persuasion:

UNDERSTAND INFLUENCERS

We are all influenced by something – a study out of CCL, the Center for Creative Leadership, talks about the three main influencers: head, hands, and heart. If you’re influenced by “head,” you need logic, facts, figures – all of those provable and hard details that can be studied and quoted. Maybe it’s something like “94% of all people” or “17 out of 20 individuals” – those statistics are critical for action. If you’re influenced by “hands,” you need collective action. Think “we’re all in this together,” and group think. We can all accomplish this together if we work together. If “heart” influences you, you’re likely moved by emotional stories and connections. That “sob story” probably gets you to donate money or commit to a cause.

Understanding how you are influenced as well as which influencers you use are key to building your skills in persuasion. If you have a specific area that you excel in, use that to convince others. You can also consider how others are influenced, and tap into those areas when you’re looking to change a thought or an action. Beyond that, making sure your argument and action connects with a few different kinds of influences – say you are trying to get folks signed on for a cause. You might want to tap head and heart for a wider reach.

UNDERSTAND WANTS

Thinking about your audience is critical – what do they want and what do you want? You might be able to clearly define what you want out of a moment or from an audience. That’s only one side! Think about that other side – what does your audience want out of the situation? How can you make their life easier or better through what you’re asking for?

Meeting in the middle is just that – figuring out what you want and being able to explicitly say it – and then doing the same for what your audience wants. After you’ve got those two wants identified, tap into the middle. How can you both get a good outcome?

How can you align the two wants and lean into that future, and use it in your argument?

BUILD EMPATHY

The idea of empathy gets tossed around too often. By understanding how to see things on the other side and truly connect with it, you’re practicing empathy.

When you think of being persuasive, we usually don’t think about the other side. We think about what we want and the action we’re leaning into. Think about why the people you’re trying to persuade haven’t taken that action or belief on. Is there something standing in the way, a reason why they aren’t agreeing with it already, especially if it’s something that feels very helpful or natural? Addressing that block first might be a great strategy moving forward.

In addition to understanding the block, by practicing empathy you’re able to see what the audience finds important. This is critical to understanding those influencers! Have they been led by facts up to this point, and are you trying to convince them with an emotional story? That might not work as well as a story with facts sprinkled in. Remember, it’s not just about you and your wants.

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June 2020 | 105

BY SARA MIGLIARESE

BE AWARE OF NEUROLOGIC SYMPTOMS DUE TO COVID-19 By now, most of you reading this can probably recite the typical symptoms caused by Covid-19. You would correctly list coughing, fever, aches, tiredness, sore throat, and in some cases shortness of breath and respiratory distress. These sound like they come from a respiratory infection and are easily connected to COVID-19. Recent evidence suggests that there is another set of symptoms that we need to pay attention to as well, since one-third of COVID-19 patients experience them. The new evidence points to a set of neurologic symptoms that 30-40 % of patients have reported. Some neurologic symptoms are mild, like dizziness or headache. But several reports have described COVID-19 patients suffering from Guillain-Barre syndrome. Guillain-Barre syndrome is a neurological disorder where the immune system mistakenly attacks nerve cells, resulting in muscle weakness and eventually paralysis. While most patients with Guillain-Barre recover fully, some suffer from residual paralysis. Other studies have described severe COVID-19 brain inflammation and swelling, called encephalitis, and stroke in healthy young people with otherwise mild COVID-19 symptoms. Other more specific and severe symptoms reported include loss of smell or taste, muscle weakness, seizure, and hallucinations. These symptoms occur in the more severe cases, but sometimes, even after recovery, symptoms can persist. Persistent symptoms in severe cases have been reported as changes in consciousness, disorientation, inattention, and movement disorders.

Intense loss of smell and taste have reported in milder cases, but they typically recover in 2-4 weeks. Some experts are suggesting that these sensory losses be included in early screening for COVID-19 since they are early warning signs of the infection.

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Some groups of people, like the elderly or those with diabetes, are at higher risk of getting COVID-19 and are more likely to get really sick from it. These groups are joined by people with degenerative diseases like multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s disease, or Alzheimer’s disease. Some adults with these conditions may be taking medications that compromise their immune system, have other co-morbidities, or may not move or exercise as much, all factors that increase their risk of becoming seriously sick from COVID-19. It is recommended that adults in these at-risk groups take extra precautions by following suggested social distancing and personal protective equipment, like masks, when in public. They should be extra careful! They should also seek medical advice or a telehealth visit if they are experiencing minor signs and symptoms consistent with COVID-19. They should contact their doctor or call 911 right away if they have: • A really hard time breathing • Constant pain or pressure in the chest • Trouble thinking clearly • A blue tint to lips or face Telehealth visits are especially beneficial for patients who have conditions that require regular medical checkups, but that place them at higher risk of contracting COVID-19 if out in public. Some insurances cover the costs of telehealth for many medical services, but patients should contact their insurance provider and medical practitioner to determine if telehealth is covered and is an option for regular medical assessment while COVID-19 has us indoors.

Stay strong. Stay active. Stay aware.

Stay patient as we ride this pandemic out together. Remember that COVID-19 is not just a cough or sore throat, but can also change your sense of smell and taste, and much worse.

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CrystalCleaner3155@gmail.com June 2020 | 107

As parents collectively work to make their graduating seniors’ graduations memorable, despite recent circumstances, we hereby award the following “Momperlatives” (as opposed to Superlatives)

ZELL HENNINGS

Most likely to attend every home NC State football and basketball game while at college.

PHOTOS BY PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

We would like to recognize our 2020 Senior of Forbush High School, Zell Hennings. While at Forbush, Zell was a 4-year member of the Beta Club and Football team. Zell will be following in his father’s footsteps when he attends NC State University to study Engineering. We love you, Mom and Dad

DAVIS SPEAS

Most likely to become a billionaire and still ask his mom and dad for gas money.

Congratulations, Davis Speas, for your graduation from Reagan High School!

You discovered lacrosse before it was popular in our area, and not only did you play in high school, you made friends for life playing travel lacrosse for LB3, Fleet, Twins, and Fusion.

We loved watching you play through the years! As you graduate and prepared to attend High Point University in the fall, remember your motto, “Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.”

We love you and are very proud of you – Mom, Dad, and John.

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COURTNEY BRAVINDER

Most likely to have a child born with a Starbucks addiction.

Grace is when God gives us good things we don’t deserve.

Mercy is when he spares us from bad things we deserve.

BLESSINGS are when he is generous with both. You have been such a blessing to us from the moment you arrived. We are lucky to have been chosen by God to help raise you to be the young women you have become. Congratulations on finishing your high school journey “quarantine style.” Best of luck on your next adventure at ECU and becoming a future nurse.

We need you more than ever! We love you, Mom & Dad

PHOTOS BY CHRIS MOERMAN

LANE HAMBRICK

Most likely to be famous on Instagram!

Congratulations to West Forsyth High School graduate, Lane Hambrick! Lane will attend East Carolina University in the fall. She is interested in health sciences and plans to study Speech Pathology. Though her senior year has not gone as planned, she has had a good attitude and is focused more on things she can control.

She has been such a blessing to our family, and we know whatever she sets her mind to she will do!

We are so proud of you, Mom & Dad

June 2020 | 109

PHOTO BY ALYSON SHULZ PHOTOGRAPHY

ALLIE KLASS

Most likely to find a way to bring her cat to college.

Allie Klass is a graduate of West Forsyth High School. She was very involved with Girl Scouts, volunteering at the Humane society and participated in many clubs in school. This fall, she will attend Appalachian State University to study Interior Design and Architecture.

Allie is also a member of the App State Color guard.

EMMA BLANKS

Most likely to never run out of words or meet a stranger no matter where she goes.

Congratulations to Emma Blanks who has graduated from West Forsyth High School! Emma played field hockey, was a member of SGA, Girls Service Club and DECA, and came in First Place in The DECA State competition. She will attend the University of Tennessee - Knoxville in the fall to study international business and Spanish. Go Vols!

Love, Mom, Dad, Abby & Izzy

WALKER FEATHERNGILL

Most likely to be late, sneaky smart, and best smile.

PHOTOS BY PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

Congratulations Walker Featherngill for graduating cum laude from Davie High, with or without a ceremony! We are incredibly proud of you and looking forward to your days at NC State! We are proud of you and all the seniors at Davie County High School. Your senior year was most unusual, but you made it! Love, Mom & Dad

MORGAN BACON

Most likely to own a puppy farm, run for office, and class clown!

Congratulations, Morgan Bacon! In your next know there is nothing you can’t do. Go hit the game winner! Live loud! Open up and shine! Goodbye Reynolds hello NC State!

Love, Mom and Papa

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112 | ForsythWoman.com

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Conversations with Your How Do You Know When BFF

BY REBECCA COOPER

You Need to Break Up?

I have no idea how many times, or how many relationships, I have ‘patched’ up.

After you have an argument about who does more at home, disagree over where to go for a holiday, or just realize your partner isn’t giving their all, you give it another shot and then another shot. We all overlook times that our partner lets us down and set it aside and move on until the next time it happens. But how many times do you patch things up before you realize it may be time to break up? I am so glad you asked! There are specific times that signal you may want to move on…

WHEN FORGIVING AND FORGETTING ISN’T IN THE CARDS

We all have those lines that, when crossed, can’t be ignored. A behavior or a choice your partner made that can’t be forgiven or forgotten; it’s a complete deal breaker for you, and the only reason you haven’t ended the relationship yet is because you have so much history together, because you’re testing to see if you could potentially move past the issue and make things work. But if your trust has been breached, and you can’t imagine ever rebuilding the trust once there, then this is much more than a rough patch…it’s a reason to break up.

WHEN YOU’VE GROWN INTO DIFFERENT PEOPLE, WANTING DIFFERENT THINGS IN LIFE As time passes, we all grow into new versions of ourselves. It can take a little while to adjust to each other’s differences…getting used to the new yous. However, if you want completely different things now, if you see your future differently now, if you’re simply incompatible now, then this is probably not to be labeled ‘a rough patch.’ It doesn’t necessarily mean that you stop caring about each other; it simply means you’ve started to grow in different directions and are going to do better going it alone.

114 | ForsythWoman.com

WHEN YOU’VE GONE DOWN THIS ROAD ONE TOO MANY TIMES

If you have the same argument over and over about the same thing, with no resolution, there is an issue. You either need to fix whatever is wrong so you never have to repeat the same fight again, or you need to come to terms with the fact you’re never going to fix it and walk away. Easier said than done if you have time invested in the relationship. If you don’t choose to fix it or walk away, it may blow over in the short-term, but know that you will live to fight over this issue another day.

WHEN YOU’RE PAST THE POINT OF ANNOYANCE AND HATE THE SOUND WHEN THEY BREATHE

We all have our quirks, those little idiosyncrasies that make us who we are. It’s those differences that can help you fall in love with a person, but if your relationship is nearing its end, those quirks may start driving you crazy. You may leave conversations with your partner feeling exhausted and just wanting time apart. But if that time apart evolves into you just hate the sound they make when they breathe, it may be time to say goodbye.

WHEN YOUR ENERGY IS DEPLETED AND YOU DON’T WANT TO FIX YOUR ISSUES

Hitting the wall and not wanting to communicate with your partner or wanting to explain to them your perspective is a sign you are losing interest in the relationship.

If you are still passionate and have a fire to talk things over, there’s something left, but if you really don’t want to put in the effort, it’s a good time to leave.

WHEN YOU’VE FELT THIS WAY FOR A LONG, LONG TIME

After a time in a relationship, you may not have the butterflies you once had when your love was new. Rough patches come and include frustration, boredom, and confusion, but if you’re honest with yourself and you’ve been questioning your relationship for a long time, then you probably need a fresh start. Putting off the inevitable only makes the inevitable harder and wastes time.

(formerly Hutch & Harris)

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YoungCardinalWS.com | 424 4th Street NW, Winston-Salem (formally Hutch & Harris) June 2020 | 115

Marzano Captial Group

Congratulations to the Class of 2020!

336-766-0464 · marzanocapitalgroup.com

WEALTH MANAGEMENT · RETIREMENT & INSURANCE PLANNING · EXECUTIVE & EMPLOYEE BENEFITS · 529 PLANS FOR COLLEGE Securities offered through LPL Financial Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advice offered through Independent Advisor Alliance, a registered investment advisor. Independent Advisor Alliance and Marzano Capital Group are separate entities from LPL Financial.

116 | ForsythWoman.com