Forsyth Woman - February 2019

February 2019

February 2019 | 1

Restoration MedSpa

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Windsor Jewelers

February 2019 | 3

Goldman Center

With Offices Serving the Piedmont and the High Country

NEAL D. GOLDMAN, MD Double Board Certified Facial Plastic Surgeon

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No winter lasts forever, the spring will always come.

Pat’s Body Shop

336-945-3767 February 2019 | 5

February 2019

42 COVER STORY

36 COVER STORY: Take Control of Your Health with the Help of Medi WeightLoss

34 62

Things Not to Say to Your Pregnant Friend

64 92 98

Your Happy Chemicals and How to Trigger Them

FEATURES

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12 50

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Online Real-ationships and Romance: Pros and Cons of Online Dating

Failure is Inevitable.

Embrace It. Adulting 101

Hip Chics Boutique

February 2019 | 7

IN EVERY ISSUE

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22 28 30 46 76 82 84 86 88 110 114

W ters Who Read: New Reads for 2019

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Keeping it Real: Your New Chapter Dear June…

Aesthetic and Comfortable ReDESIGNS by Ava: Try Breaking a Few Decorating Rules Be You: Potato, Egg or Coffee Bean?

Hustle & Heart Recipe: Raspberry Linzer Heart Cookies Women on the Move To Your Health Calendar of Events Conversations with Your BFF

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Homestead Hills

February 2019 | 9

The View From This Side FEBRUARY 2019 Dear Readers, As we go to print this month with the February issues, I’m very close to having a radiation plan in place. I am so ready to have this put behind me, but I thank you all so much for your kind messages and prayers. I know I’m going to beat this, because I have faith, but your support helps keep me strong. Other news in my life -- my soon-to-be 84-year-old dad has moved in with us! It has been a blessing to have him in our home and we’re grateful we can extend to him the love and hospitality he’s given to others, including us, throughout the years. Dad has settled in very nicely and he has his own space that he’s been making his own.

We’re looking forward to celebrating his birthday later this month... As well as my daughter, Brooke’s! Brooke will be turning 29 on February 28th, and I cannot believe it.

Parents, you understand. It’s surreal when it seems your babies were just babies, and then you blink, and they’ve turned into functioning adults! If you see Brooke at this month’s GNO, be sure to wish her a happy birthday!

A huge shout out to Photo Artistry by Melinda for her help wrangling my family for these much over-due family pictures… it’s never easy, but with my family, the pain is real!

There are only two people in this picture that enjoyed the process... I’m betting most of you can guess!

We hope your 2019 is off to a great start! Did you pick up the 2019 issue of Forsyth Community yet? We wrote about it in the January issue, and as our annual publication -- it still has a long shelf-life! We hope you will make sure you get a copy and share it with friends. As always, we are so thankful to you, our readers. We are honored that our advertising partners choose us to market their business with us. And we have a dynamic team in place that contributes monthly content for you to enjoy! Not to mention, incredibly talented artists who make the magazines so beautiful every month.

There are a lot of cogs in the wheel, but you are an important part of it. Please make sure you let our advertisers know you saw them in this month’s issue!

PUBLISHER

Keela

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR

Keela Johnson Keela@ForsythMags.com

Vonda Henderson

ASSOCIATE EDITOR

Jon Eric Johnson Photography

Brooke Eagle Brooke@ForsythMags.com

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Tamara Bodford

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Brooke Eagle • Heather Spivey Cindy Butler

ADVERTISING Advertising@ForsythMags.com

COVER PHOTOGRAPHY CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS

Jon Eric Johnson Photography Photo Artistry by Melinda

CONTENT EDITORS

Kim Beane Meghan Corbett (Assistant)

SENIOR STAFF WRITERS

Meghan Corbett Denise Heidel Carolyn Peterson

OTHER CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Lea Church | Elisa Coppede | Rebecca Cooper | June DeLugas Lisa Doss | Martie Emory | Tabi Falcone | Julie Fritz Abigal Gleason | Tracy Fink | Denise Heidel | Vonda Henderson Taryn Jerez | Debbie Lanier | Ava Lewandowski | Debbie Linville Jamie Lober | Dave McConnell | Mack Moore | Brittany Orie Carolyn Peterson | Tabatha Renegar | Rosey | Susan Schabacker Al Seymour | Christine Shamilian | Megan Taylor | Sara Wiles

GRAPHIC DESIGN & PRODUCTION

Emerson Designs

WEB DESIGN/MAINTENANCE

Nu expression NuExpression.com

IT SUPPORT

TriadMac TriadMac.com

CONTACT

ForsythWoman.com 888-892-3204

FORSYTH WOMAN DISCLAIMER: Please note that the inclusion of stories and articles in Forsyth Woman magazine does not imply endorsement of products or people. The views of the authors are

presented for information and entertainment only, and may not necessarily reflect the views of Forsyth Woman. Specifically, Forsyth Woman in no way endorses any claim associated with health and/or well being with respect to any particular person. We disclaim all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose. We will not be held responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage that is caused or alleged to have been caused in connection with the use of, or reliance on, any content in this magazine. Forsyth Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Forsyth Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned. Forsyth Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited. ©2005 by Forsyth Woman, Inc.

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Medi Weightloss

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As the saying goes, if you can’t take the heat, get the heck out of the kitchen. But in this case, we’re excited for some folks to get the heck IN the kitchen and cook!

Get your appetites ready, because the SECU Family House in Winston-Salem will be serving up the 4th annual helping of their popular “Men Who Cook” fundraising event this year on Saturday, March 16th at Bridger Field House. The event brings together local male amateur chefs and their cooking teams who battle it out to please the taste buds of nearly 400 hungry attendees of the event. Participating chefs come from all sectors of the Winston-Salem community, from banking to clergy, lawyers to realtors, higher education to local media, and everything in between.

“We are thrilled that this event continues to be one that garners such wonderful support for our house,” said Kathy Carr, executive director of SECU Family House. “The kitchen is definitely the heart of our homes and meal preparation is such a large part of the services that Family House provides its guests.

We love bringing families together over food, and we couldn’t have found a better way to celebrate our mission of providing assistance to adult patients and caregivers who are going through difficult health crises.”

Celebrity chefs aren’t in it just to show off their cooking prowess, either. It’s about the big picture and supporting an important resource in our community.

“We are so lucky to have such world-renowned healthcare in our community.

The Family House is a way of welcoming our out-of-town healthcare patients and their families,” said Dr. Michael Lischke, who won 1st place last year with teammates Phil Roethle and Jeff Smith and will defend that title this year. “It takes away a little bit of stress and financial burden and provides an amazing level of comfort for our patients and their families. It’s like going to Grandma’s house — wonderful food, comfort, and people ready to do whatever you need.”

And newbies to the event are just as excited about having fun and doing good at the same time. “I am really looking forward to such a fun and unique event that helps an amazing organization,” said Mark Owens, President and CEO of the Winston-Salem Chamber of Commerce and new chef this year.

“I have already started practicing my cooking skills and am excited to put them to the test!”

The Family House, which is conveniently located near Winston-Salem’s two major hospitals and their surrounding medical clinic areas, has served as home base for folks from 95 North Carolina counties and 42 states and has welcomed more than 32,000 overnight guests since opening its doors in 2011.

When families come to our area with their loved ones for medical treatment – whether planned or in emergency situations – the Family House provides a welcoming, comfortable atmosphere for rest, food, community and more.

There is a small overnight fee for guests, and a Family House assistance fund is in place thanks to faithful donations and events like the Men Who Cook fundraiser.

Each year, Men Who Cook chefs create their own recipes, ranging from appetizers to desserts, and may utilize a sous chef during the event. They provide samples of their fares for attendees to enjoy, and four judges’ prizes and a People’s Choice Award will be given to winning chefs. Early online voting will be available as well. Last year alone, the Men Who Cook event raised nearly $140,000 for the SECU Family House!

Make plans to join us on March 16 when Winston-Salem’s own will roll up their sleeves and get to work for a great cause!

SECU [State Employees’ Credit Union] Family House “Men Who Cook” Saturday, March 16 – 6:30-9:00 pm | Bridger Field House, Winston-Salem Wooden Spoon sponsorships are available for $250, which include two reservations and a listing in the souvenir program. Event reservations are $75 for a single ticket, $140 for couples. Contact Tracy Geiger at the SECU Family House at 336-793-2822 or tracy.geiger@familyhousews.org.

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Delivering Care for Generations…

Lyndhurst

Proudly Offering These Services Obstetrics & Gynecologic Care • Bone Density • CenteringPregnancy® Infertility • In-Office Surgeries • Mammography • Medical Spa Research • Ultrasound • Urogynecology 111 Hanestown Court, Suite 151 Winston-Salem, NC 27103 336.765.9350

445 Pineview Drive, Suite 110 Kernersville, NC 27284 336.993.4532

1908 Caudle Road, Suite 101 Mt. Airy, NC 27030 336-789-9076

304 Mountainview Road King, NC 27021 336-765-9350

www.lyndhurstgyn.com

Novant Employees: We are in the Novant Network!

February 2019 | 13

Leading the Way in Cord Safety

BY MACK MOORE, OWNER, BUDGET BLINDS OF NORTH WINSTON-SALEM AND MT AIRY

Also, on December 15, 2018, the Window Covering Manufacturer’s Association (WCMA), after working with the Consumer Product Safety Commission for many years (CPSA), imposed a new industry standard, which requires most window covering products sold in the United States and Canada to be cordless or have inaccessible or short cords.

There were big changes during December 2018 for Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem and the window blind industry.

We are proud to announce that we are now Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem and Mt Airy, after expanding our service area in early December. We now cover Walkertown, Walnut Cove, King, Pilot Mountain, Dobson, Jonesville, Danbury, Elkin, Mt Airy and many other communities. With more customers from these areas reaching out for our services, it was the right time to expand our footprint. We are excited to help more customers refresh their homes with new window treatments.

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We are proud to be a part of Budget Blinds which has been on the forefront of this safety issue, and have been moving away from corded products and educating consumers on this issue for several years. Making window treatments safer for homes with children is a top priority. Budget Blinds has aligned itself with WCMA for more than 15 years and continues to adhere to its criteria and safety standards by offering many options for child-friendly window treatments, including cordless blinds and shades with a retractable lift, motorized shades with a cordless operation, and shutters, which are inherently cordless.

When Budget Blinds of North Winston-Salem and Mt Airy visit a client seeking window coverings, we evaluate the home for safety – are there children, pets or elderly residents who should be part of the equation in choosing the right product? Where physical limitations exist, we encourage motorization for the ultimate safety solution for window coverings.

We often tell parents, “It’s not so much the window treatment itself, but the cords that operate the window treatment that pose a strangulation hazard. In fact, for the past few years, we’ve been educating homeowners on child-safe options for their window treatments. Motorization is definitely a favorite, and advances in technology help to keep motorization affordable.”

This new regulation affects all companies who manufacture, distribute, or sell window coverings in the U.S., and all must comply with the industry safety standard or face enforcement action by the CPSC and/or be open to legal action if noncompliant products are sold.

Budget Blinds requires its manufacturing partners to comply with safety regulations as determined by WCMA. Manufacturing partners also participate in WCMA’s new “Best for Kids” program in which products must be submitted to a WCMA-recognized third-party testing laboratory for certification. Products that meet stringent criteria will be eligible to be listed and labeled on packaging and materials as “certified” Best for Kids.

Our team at Budget Blinds of North WinstonSalem and Mt Airy understand safety and can help clients choose the best safety and automation options for their homes, and provide design consultation. A simple complimentary discussion with the homeowner is all that is needed to make a home safer.

Contact Budget Blinds of North-Winston-Salem and Mt Airy, for a free consultation at 336.701.5474, or visit BudgetBlinds.com/NorthWinstonSalem.

Budget Blinds

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Vic Khemsara, MD | Keith Biggs, OD

Laser Cataract Surgery Glaucoma Treatment • Diabetic Treatment Multifocal Lens Implants • General Eye Exams

Summit Eye Care

The perfect glasses for your love bug.

We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. – Romans 8:28 www.summiteyecare.net • www.facebook.com/SummitEyeCare 336.765.0960 • 3073 Trenwest Drive • Winston-Salem, NC 27103

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CATARACTS & CATARACT SURGERY

BY CHRISTINE SHAMLIAN, CLINICAL MANAGER

Everyone is born with a natural lens in their eye. If you have a cataract, your lens has become cloudy. It is like looking through a foggy or dusty car windshield. Things look blurry, hazy or less colorful with a cataract.

Aging is the most common cause. This is due to normal eye changes that happen starting around age 40. That is when normal proteins in the lens start to break down. This is what causes the lens to get cloudy. People over age 60 usually start to have some clouding of their lenses. However, vision problems may not happen until years later. Other reasons you may get cataracts include: having parents, siblings, or other family members who have cataracts; having certain medical problems, such as diabetes; having had an eye injury, eye surgery, or radiation treatments on your upper body; having spent a lot of time in the sun, especially without sunglasses that protect your eyes from damaging ultraviolet (UV) rays; or using certain medications such as corticosteroids, which may cause early formation of cataracts. Your eye physician will let you know when it’s time for cataract surgery.

Going to a doctor’s appointment can be scary and frustrating when you don’t know what to expect, especially when it comes to your eyes. At Summit Eye Care a cataract surgery preoperative appointment may take up to two to two and a half hours. At this appointment, a patient will be worked up by a friendly, well-trained technician. The work-up includes chief medical complaints, vision check (reading the eye chart), pressure check, and dilation of both eyes. It is advised that the patient bring a driver with them to this appointment due to being dilated.

The patient will then move on to the testing portion of the appointment.

Here is the most important and critical part of the visit. During the testing portion, multiple tests, anywhere from six to eight, will be performed to gather information to aide Dr. Khemsara and the patient in choosing the best lens options for cataract surgery. The patient will be asked to sit as still as possible, look at multiple lights and tilt their head in certain directions to achieve maximum success. These tests calculate the size, shape, and distance of the lens in the eye to the front and back of the eye.

Simply Sterling & Co.

After all test are completed, the patient is ready to see Dr. Khemsara.

The patient will watch a short 4-minute educational video on a new exciting bladeless way of performing cataract surgery. Once the video is complete, Dr. Khemsara will come into the room and perform a thorough evaluation. Dr. Khemsara and the patient will discuss cataract surgery and all options available to the patient.

Cataract surgery is performed at the Novant Health Hawthorne Surgical Center. It is a same-day outpatient procedure.

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“ T H E O N LY P E R S O N YO U A R E D E ST I N E D T O B E C OM E I S T H E P E R S O N YO U D E C I D E T O B E .” R A L P H WA L D O E M E R S O N

GROWING IN GOOD COMPANY! BY MARTIE EMORY Besides inviting a diverse group of guest speakers from within the Forsyth County community to further their “living and learning” strategies, the camaraderie within PWWS also regularly encourages the sharing of inspirational quotes, book recommendations (these are women with likely several good selections on their nightstands!) and advice on continually inspiring each other to step out of everyday comfort zones. Growth is what PWWS is all about!

FRONT ROW, LEFT TO RIGHT: Julie Bell-Secretary, Shandi Foster-Marketing Chair, Suzanne Traub-Membership Chair, Andrea Kimura-Vice President BACK ROW, LEFT TO RIGHT: Michelle Harris-Marketing Co-Chair/Photography, Erika Mielke-Programs Chair, Barb Smith-President, Cassandra Elliott-Special Events Chair. Not pictured: Rebecca Brummel-Treasurer, Peg Weir-Scholarship Chair, Rita Bottoms-Programs Co-Chair, Karen Gerber-Special Events Co-Chair

What began as a “small group” gathering in 1990 has grown into an amazing network of professional women who love where they live and love the endless possibilities they see in each other every single day.

Founded on the principles of believing in yourself, honoring commitment, and creating inspiration wherever possible, the Professional Women of Winston-Salem (PWWS) welcomes women from all areas and professions and has truly created a community of its own – within the larger Forsyth County community. From knowing when it’s time to switch gears in your profession, to adjusting your career goals to better suit where you are in life at the moment (Need more flexibility? Facing job burnout? Feeling the call to become a mentor?), the support members feel from PWWS can be life-changing.

• Embracing life in transition • Dressing for Success: This is the group’s philanthropic focus for the first quarter of 2019, and they will be collecting clothing donations in partnership with winstonsalem. dressforsuccess.org • Body language, attitude, and personal presentation • Focusing on philanthropy • Mentoring – recognizing what you have to share with others and finding your own mentor as well • Surrounding yourself with positive people • Networking activity that allows you to open doors for others, as well as yourself • Building stamina and discipline for a healthy mind and body • Impacting your own finances with a “side hustle” • Impacting the community with a focus on non-profits • Achieving work/life balance, setting goals, and keeping it all in perspective

Since 2000, PWWS has also given annual scholarships to assist single, employed mothers in Forsyth County who are working towards the completion of a college degree.

Recognizing the personal sacrifice of these women is a shining example of giving back to inspire women to keep moving forward towards success, rather than focusing on past defeats.

Current President Barb Smith leads this year’s dynamic board, along with Andrea Kimura, Vice President, Julie Bell, Secretary, Rebecca Brummel, Treasurer, Suzanne Traub, Membership Chair, Erika Mielke, Programs Chair, Shandi Foster, Marketing Chair, Peg Weir, Scholarship Chair, Cassandra Elliott, Special Events Chair, Rita Bottoms, Programs Co-Chair, Michelle Harris, Marketing Co-Chair/Photography, and Karen Gerber, Special Events Co-Chair. Without a doubt, it is the entrepreneurial spirit and dedication to the families and careers that molds PWWS into such an engaging group of community leaders!

For more information on becoming a member of the Professional Women of Winston-Salem and updates on their ongoing programs, visit pwws.org or email info@pwws.org. You are also encouraged to donate to their scholarship fund throughout the year by visiting the website.

The organization begins each new year with a rich and inspiring slate of themes geared towards helping members’ growth both professionally and personally. And each attendee writes a letter to herself detailing goals for the upcoming year, and the letters are re-read the following January. The group meets on the second Wednesday of each month from 11:30 a.m.

– 1 p.m. in the Flow Club at BB&T Ballpark.

For 2019, following the 2018 theme of “Your Year of Transformation” and this year’s vision of “Your Professional Journey’s Next Level,” this dynamic group of women will be focusing on topics that will include the following, to better their own lives and to nurture future generations of women in Forsyth County: • Being a culture carrier: Are you modeling professionalism?

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FRONT ROW, LEFT TO RIGHT: Peg Weir-Scholarship Chair, Julie Bell-Secretary, Barb Smith-President, Andrea Kimura-Vice President, BACK ROW, LEFT TO RIGHT: Rita Bottoms-Programs Co-Chair, Shandi Foster-Marketing Chair, Suzanne Traub-Membership Chair, Michelle Harris-Marketing Co-Chair/Photography, Erika Mielke-Programs Chair. Not pictured Rebecca Brummel-Treasurer, Karen Gerber-Special Events Co-Chair

Massage Envy

February 2019 | 19

Bloomday Granite & Marble Join them at the Triad Home & Garden Show!

BY MARTIE EMORY

held February 15-17, 2019, in the Education Building of the Winston-Salem Fairgrounds.

What was first founded as a monument company is now the Triad’s leading source for stunning countertops. In 2002, Frederick Stephens Cooke, Jr. started today’s version of the company (Bloomday Granite & Marble) with a dedication to continuing his family’s tradition of excellence in the stone industry.

The name is blended from his grandparent’s names, Fred Day Cooke and Nonnie Bloom Cooke, and their lifelong commitment to excellence in stone is passed on to Bloomday’s clients, both residential and commercial.

Known for exquisite countertops in granite, marble, quartz, and other natural stones, Bloomday’s experts can transform kitchens (including outdoor kitchens), bathrooms, and offices. With stone surfaces in your home or office you can have a custom look that matches your personal tastes but also fits your lifestyle.

What makes Bloomday Granite & Marble stand out is its team’s expertise at its craft, as well as its love and passionate support for the community. In keeping with that tradition, the company is again proud to sponsor the 30th annual Triad Home & Garden Show, to be

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This popular family event is a favorite of current homeowners and owners-to-be, as it brings together a variety of industry leaders.

Homeowners attending this event all share the same goal of either renovating their current home or preparing to build a new home.

The Triad Home & Garden Show takes a portion of its proceeds and donates them to Habitat for Humanity Forsyth and the Career Technical Education Partnership that provides exciting opportunities each year for students to build Habitat Homes.

“The money raised through the event is important and puts back into our community.

We believe you are what your community is, and there is never not a time to donate.” says Bloomday’s Miranda Kempton.

Bloomday Granite is thrilled to play a part in providing one central location for homeowners to collect information from top of the line vendors. This makes it much easier to navigate and match up with a vendor that suits your family’s lifestyle.

“The Triad Home & Garden show allows us to not only sponsor for a good cause, but to also get our own name out there as a company to

use for projects.” says Kempton. “Remodeling or building can be stressful, but with the top builders in one location, they have a chance to weigh options to see who fits best.”

Hours for the February Triad Home & Garden Show are Friday, February 15 from 2 p.m. – 8 p.m., Saturday, February 16 from 10 a.m. – 6 p.m., and Sunday, February 17 from noon – 4 p.m. Tickets are $8.00 at the door, with children 12 and under free with a paying adult.

Free parking is located at Gate 5, 414 Deacon Blvd., and is handicap accessible.

For more information on Bloomday’s repertoire or to schedule a consultation to discuss your own home project, contact Miranda Kempton at 336-724-0300 or e-mail Miranda@ bloomdaygranite.com. The Bloomday Granite & Marble showroom is located at 3810 Indiana Avenue in Winston-Salem and is open Monday through Friday from 8:00 am to 4:00 pm, appointments recommended. Follow them online at bloomdaygranite.com as well as on social media - Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, or Houzz.

Lewisville Laser & Aesthetics

February 2019 | 21

Writers New Who Read Reads for 2019

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

For many people, they keep a list of books they want to read. These ideas are ones that might be classics, New York Times bestsellers, or newly published. To help add to your new read list for 2019, this month’s “Writers Who Read” shares some of our favorites.

THE NORTHERN LIGHTS SERIES

BY LISA TAWN BERGREN This three-book, historical fiction series is set in Norway and channels a group of immigrants coming to America in the mid1800s. The three books, The Captain’s Bride, Deep Harbor, and Midnight Sun tell the stories of characters who travel the world and those who discover the Dakotas, Washington territories, and into Alaska. “What I love is how brilliantly the author shares these stories to the point that they feel so real,” said writer Denise Heidel. “The character Kaatje may be one of my favorite characters of all the books I’ve ever read. In addition, I love history, especially this era of history, and I love how the author invites the reader to explore early American culture and other places through the eyes of the characters.”

REDEEMING LOVE

BY FRANCINE RIVERS

Another historical, Christian fiction series is Redeeming Love.

Suggested by Denise Heidel, author Francine Rivers takes the book of Hosea from the Bible and sets it in the California Gold Rush.

It follows the story of how Michael Hosea rescued and married the high-priced prostitute, Angel. With patience and prayer, Michael loves Angel just as God commanded him to do. In addition, the actual events of the prophet Hosea marrying the prostitute Gomer are mirrored in the book. “Believe it or not, I have a far greater understanding of the book of Hosea in the Bible because of this fictionalized account,” Heidel stated. “The story is a reflection of God’s love for Israel and how Israel constantly ran back to idolatry and betrayed God, yet God continued to love His chosen nation. It is Christian fiction at its finest.”

BECOMING BY MICHELLE OBAMA During the holidays, I was glued to the book Becoming. It was riveting, full of personal reflections, and very inspiring.

Former First Lady Michelle Obama gives readers insight into her childhood and life before and after her husband, Barack Obama’s presidency. This memoir is divided into three sections: “Becoming Me,” “Becoming Us,” and “Becoming More.” In “Becoming Me,” Obama gives an in-depth account of her childhood in the South Side of Chicago, years spent at Princeton and Harvard, her career days, and the beginning of creating a life and family with her husband. “Becoming Us” channels Barack’s early political days, as well as their joys and challenges of raising two daughters. Lastly, “Becoming More” channels the Obamas’ time spent in the White House.

The author describes the joys and triumphs, along with the challenges they faced. Also, this section gives readers a full understanding and picture of how during those eight years, the White House became very welcoming, as well as an overview of the programs Obama created to empower women, girls, and military members and their families. After reading the book, I left feeling energized and motivated to become a better person and help make a difference in the world. Becoming provides readers with little bits of advice and encouragement to us in our own lives. Plus, the book is a #1 New York Times bestseller and a 2018 selection for Oprah’s book club selection. So, you know if Oprah approves, it must be something good.

New reads are popping up all the time. The only problem is just making the time to read all of the books. Happy reading!

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Piedmont Federal Savings Bank

February 2019 | 23

$25 RAVE BEAUTY Kaye McDaniels

BUDGET BLINDS WINDOW TREATMENT Melissa Lentz

$25 GIFTS & PAPER ON PLAZA Siham

$50 DALTON’S CROSSING Patricia Darnell

$25 KIM TAYLOR & CO. Gloria Davis

PRIVATE PILATES SESSION FROM INNER STRENGTH PILATES Katie Miller

$25 WINE MERCHANTS Linda Hammett

$25 HAKKA CHOW ASIAN EATS Ziggie Ziglar

$25 URBN GRL Taryn Jerez

$25 HIP CHICS BOUTIQUE Anna Holbrook

$25 MELLIE & EMILIA Marion C. Tyson

$25 FOOTNOTE COFFEE & COCKTAILS Deborah Streeter

$25 DAVIE TAVERN Julie Spitzer

$25 ACCENT PRONE Catherine Heyer

Bev Holbrook

$25 PROVIDENCE KITCHEN Gail Hairston Sherry Campbell

MYSTERY PRIZE Velma Lockhart

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PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

$25 THE COLLEGIATE SHOP APPAREL & GIFTS

Grab a friend, a neighbor, your sister, your mother, a co-worker, and have a much needed Girls’ Night Out!

Girls Night Out

Three Bulls American Steakhouse

Tuesday, February 5th | 5pm - until 1480 River Ridge Drive | Clemmons, NC 27012 | 336-842-5363

$5 Raspberry Lemonade Sangrias

February 2019 | 25

ROSEY’S REVIEW

BB&T Financial Center 200 W. Second Street • Winston-Salem, NC 27101

BY ROSEY

Providence Restaurant opened in 2015 with a new twist on the traditional dining experience. It wasn’t just the ingenuity in the kitchen that set Providence apart – it’s the fact that it operates as a non-profit restaurant, an extension of Providence Culinary Training’s program at Second Harvest Food Bank. Led by executive Director Jeff Bacon, Providence Restaurant has enjoyed tremendous success in the Triad.

And in September 2018, phase two of this innovative concept, Providence Kitchen, opened right in the heart of downtown Winston-Salem.

Located in the BB&T Financial Center, Providence Kitchen is open to the public. It was super-easy to access. We parked in the public parking garage and simply walked in the front door. Just because this restaurant is located in the BB&T building, doesn’t mean it’s exclusive to employees of BB&T (though you may be jealous of all those who work in the building and have easy access to Providence Kitchen on a daily basis). It’s open to the general public, Monday – Friday from 8 AM – 3 PM.

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I was super-excited to try Providence Kitchen. Having had the pleasure of dining at Providence Restaurant on a number of occasions, I knew the food would be excellent. I just wasn’t entirely sure what was on the menu. I knew they served lunch, but I was delighted to learn that they also serve breakfast. As a fan of breakfast at any time of day, this was a huge win for me.

We started with the HOT MESS BISCUIT. [Insert the sounds of non-nom-nom here.]

Oh, goodness. Where to begin? Scratchmade biscuits that, frankly, may put your grandmother’s to shame… The Hot Mess Biscuit is topped with gravy, a choice of meat, eggs, cheese, green onions, and a honey-bacon crumble. The Southern roots behind this dish are bursting with every incredible bite. We had our served with a delicious piece of fried chicken – it wasn’t remotely greasy. I confess it was the first time in Rosey Review history where we literally cleaned the plate. We have to pace ourselves when we go on restaurant reviews, and while it’s been tempting to clean the plate on numerous occasions, we’ve generally managed to restrain ourselves.

Next, we sampled the DEUTSCH BABY PANCAKES OLD SALEM STYLE. I’ve heard of popover style pancakes before but haven’t

actually tried them. They were, in a word, incredible. The Old Salem style pancake is topped with cinnamon sugar, a local berry compote, and a decadently creamy housemade ricotta cheese. The flavors created a wonderful blend of tart and creamygoodness. But hey – don’t worry. If sweets aren’t your thing, Providence Kitchen has a savory version – the Mannheim has ham, Havarti cheese, spicy maple, and powdered sugar. YUM! And for the second time in Rosey Review history, we cleaned the plate.

(Are you starting to see a pattern here?

There were only three of us!).

We moved away from the breakfast menu, and on to lunch. And first up, we tried the CAROLINA COBB SALAD. Y’all, I’m not generally one who goes for salad-as-a-meal, but I do love Cobb salads. And for this one, Providence Kitchen has put their own unique twist on the traditional favorite. It has all the elements of a Cobb salad, but it’s got a personality of Providence-proportions.

Mixed greens are served with dollops of smoky pimento cheese, along with jalapeno bacon, pickled okra, hard-boiled egg, and candied pecans. Top all this off with their house-made Vidalia onion vinaigrette, and you will have a salad to drool over. Friends, I am not a picky eater. It would be hard to be picky when you review restaurants on a

ProvidenceWS.org

monthly basis. But okra is not a vegetable that I gravitate towards and I actually have some emotional trauma related to fried okra that my mother used to make me eat as a girl. But I actually loved the pickled okra that was in this salad. It added a really nice burst of flavor along with the smokiness of the pimento cheese.

Next up – ANCIENT GRAINS BOWL. “The Office” fans may remember the episode in which Michael said, “Nobody likes beets, Dwight!” WRONG! Michael would be investing in Schrute Beet Farm if he sampled this incredible dish. A mix of farro and freekeh has been mixed with locally grown beets – both red and yellow – as well as root vegetables, heirloom carrots, and caramelized onions. The whole thing is tossed with a maple cider vinaigrette. This is a cool salad – people expect it to be warm or hot when you are referring to grains, but it’s a beautiful medley of flavors — a very light salad that doesn’t leave you feeling heavy, but full and satisfied. I found it to be delightful.

Is there anything more all-American than grilled cheese and tomato soup? It’s hard to improve upon a classic, but trust me – Providence Kitchen has stepped it up by about 20 paces. Let’s start with

their 4-CHEESE GRILLED CHEESE. I tend to subscribe to the “more the merrier” school of thought when it comes to cheese, and apparently, my friends at Providence Kitchen agree. They’ve layered Havarti, smoked Gouda, cheddar, and Swiss cheeses on Texas toast to create a grilled cheese experience that has to be tried.

Then, it’s move over Soup Nazi – Providence Kitchen has created a TOMATO BASIL SOUP that will warm you from the inside out. Creamy, with a bold, rich flavor, this traditional favorite is just magnificent. Put the two together, and your inner 12-year-old will know a new level of comfort food.

Our final sandwich of the review was a CAROLINA CUBAN. And hello, Spicy Kick! I hear ya! Served on a Cuban roll, layers of smoked pork shoulder, jalapeno bacon, ham, smoked Gouda cheese, and pickle blend with Lusty Monk mustard and chipotle lime mayo for a sandwich that is overflowing with flavors. I love spicy, and this sandwich delivered! Served with battered French fries that were perfectly crunchy – this is one of those sandwiches that can easily cover two meals. The portions were generous and, of course, delicious.

A meal is never over without a little something sweet. We tried the PROVIDENCE KITCHEN BROWNIE. Available daily, the brownie is big enough to share, but we wouldn’t judge you if you didn’t want to.

Chocolate never tasted so sweet.

With all that said – I know you’re eager to try Providence Kitchen for breakfast or lunch! And the great news… while the restaurant has ample (and comfortable) seating, they know you’re busy, so they offer carry out. They have a grab-and-go shelf where you can order online and have your lunch ready to pick up at a designated time.

No lines! Great for busy days at work when you don’t have time for a long lunch. Plus, mobile ordering is available via the app, MobileBytes. I’ve already got it downloaded to my iPhone!

Best of all – beyond great food, eating at Providence Kitchen is dining for a cause.

Because Providence Kitchen is a non-profit restaurant, all proceeds and tips go to lift up trainees and to empower their families and our community. Providence Kitchen and all Providence programs also make it a point to buy local and support local farms. Visit soon and know your lunch is helping to make a difference. And be sure to tell them that Rosey sent ya!

February 2019 | 27

Keeping It Real YOUR NEW CHAPTER

BY DR. DEBBIE LANIER

We’re a month or so into this New Year. How’s that resolution thing coming? Are you crushing it? Is it crushing you? (“Where is that list anyway? I need Xanax!”)

I hear you. But no matter how hard it feels, I am determined to write new chapters in my story this year.

That’s what life is—a story marked by chapters each year. No two should look the same. Who would want to read that, or live that?

I know it’s already February. But it’s not too late to pick up your pen.

Hey, I’m talking to YOU! You’re not going to let this year just blow by you, are you? You won’t get it back, you know. Come on, let’s do this thing!

Before we get started, do this: refuse to limit that story to “what we want to stop doing” and “whom we want to stop becoming.” That gets us nowhere.

If we spend our days merely trying to avoid life’s potholes, we run off the road.

What if we focus instead on what we want to start doing differently and on whom we want to start becoming? How do we write our new adventures in 2019?

First, be specific. Most folks say things like, “I want to get healthier” or “I want to get closer to God.” If that is the extent of the goal, nothing changes. Simply wanting something does not produce it.

Goals need details! What will I invest to reach this goal? If I want to get healthier, I must commit to consistent exercise and real nutrition. If I want closeness with God, I must prioritize time with Him. Be specific!

Second, write it down. What are you waiting for? This is your story. How many stories can you recite from memory? Trust me – your mental list will quickly evaporate (just like your quiet time after your children’s feet hit the floor!).

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Third, after establishing those written specifics, keep returning to your list to evaluate progress.

You won’t conquer Rome in a day.

Frequent self-checks keep you inching toward your goal. Even baby steps create momentum. Small successes energize and prepare you for bigger steps, for real!

You know all of that. Right? But there’s more. Are you still with me?

Fourth, Pray. Friend, don’t stroll past this. My list is bigger than me, so I need Someone bigger than me at the helm. As I revisit my specific priorities, I ask God for wisdom and courage. “Lord, help me see what I need to see to do what I know to do. Set my soul on fire to accomplish these things as if I am doing them unto You . . . because I am!” Listen!

His Unsurpassed Power is infinitely greater than your willpower!

Do you really want to get radical with me? Here we go….

Fifth, Fast! Fasting is simply hyperprayer. It’s so much more than stepping away from particular foods.

That’s just a diet. Fasting is about

stepping toward the altar of God, about wanting HIM more than you want anything else. I’m telling you, RIGHT THERE, you will discover your best self!

These words came from Jesus’ lips: "If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself.

But if you forget about yourself and look to Me, you’ll find both yourself and Me." (Matthew 10:39) Now that’s radical! Jesus’ words fly in the face of our culture that specializes in indulgence and navel-gazing.

I will never find the best me until I find Him. When I remove myself from the center of my world and let the Everlasting Father reign there, I find the very best version of me. He becomes the Power in me to crush those challenging resolutions like a Pixie Stix!

So, how will this new chapter look different than our last? What specifically will we do to make that happen? Let’s write the most adventurous, audacious chapter of our story yet. The only thing stopping us is us, but not anymore!

Here’s to amazing new chapters!

For comments or prayer, contact Dr. Lanier at PastorDebbie@HopeCommunityChurch.tv.

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February 2019 | 29

Aesthetic & Comfortable When we think of February, we think of candy, red roses, and romance. Well, romance can come in many different forms. For instance, a great master bedroom. Some folks forget about the bedroom and save it until last to decorate. I think it is as important as the kitchen, family room, and master bathroom.

So, when you are making your list of things to do for the New Year, think about the master bedroom and how to give it a romantic facelift. The first thing I would do is hire a designer because they can see a canvas in their heads that you cannot see. The job will be easier and less time consuming to have a professional involved.

First, you need an inspiration of what you want. Will it be all whites and neutrals or do you want some variation of colors?

Sometimes we just want a change. A bedroom should be inviting and relaxing. Soothing colors such as blues are classic.

It can calm your busy mind. Blues can help you sleep, however, keep it soft. Creams, which can have the feeling of warmness and candlelight, are incredibly relaxing. Soft pinks and soft greens are also good choices.

If possible, I like to start with the rug. If it is vintage or oriental or a pattern, pull the least expected color from it to tie into the bedding or the walls. Of course, it is classic to have a white or cream coverlet and shams and add layers of some colors on top of that. Sometimes it is a chore to find the correct bedding to work with the new décor, but we have multiple lines of bedding and can always find something you will like.

My own bedroom and bathroom are torn up and getting a fresh paint job, new vintage rug, and new bedding. Of course, all of this is because we had a cracked tile floor in the bathroom that was not originally installed properly. We lived with the

cracked floor for fifteen years before deciding to fix it. We knew it was going to be a mess to live in for a few months while we replaced it. This is what I do for clients, and I can sympathize with them. The tile I selected for myself to replace the broken floor is Calacatta porcelain tile in sizing l2 x 24. All in the works for a year now. I can’t wait to finish it! So, basically, the colors are coming from the tile for the rest of the décor, meaning the bedroom ensemble and the wall color. My selection for paint color to coordinate with the tile is Paper White

by Benjamin Moore. It’s a beautiful hue of barely blue. Colors do not always work the same in every house. We study the light and how it comes into a room before selecting the color. I might try a few samples, painted on boards, at different times of the day in someone’s home before the decision is made. I also like the pearl base finish by Benjamin Moore, due to the reflective ability to bounce light off the walls. A chair in my bedroom is a deep blue velvet by Lillian August. That pop of deep blue will add another dimension to my room.

I plan to find the right accent boudoir pillow for the element of surprise to tie it all together. I purchased my very nice SFERRA bedding a year ago when I found out they were discontinuing the very light blue hue fabric that I salivated over from the time we got it into the store until they discontinued the group.

For one year, the duvet has rested on top of my dresser awaiting the right time to redo the master bedroom and bath. I knew one day it would happen. I am patient because the canvas has been created in my head and I know how to complete it, but you need to be patient until all the right pieces of the puzzle are put together. Let us create your canvas with originality, and we will do all the legwork.

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February 2019 | 31

Introducing Dr. Tyler Wynne, DDS at Dr. Sharon Reid, DDS in Clemmons

After living in the area and practicing dentistry in Clemmons for over a year now, I am proud to call Clemmons my dental home. I’ve had the privilege of helping many patients reach their goals of healthy teeth and beautiful smiles that last a lifetime. It is such a welcoming community, and it is an honor to serve the dental needs of the wonderful residents of this area. I’m focused on ensuring a comfortable and caring environment for my patients throughout their visits. My patients often comment “Wow, I didn’t feel that injection at all!” or “That’s the best dental experience I’ve ever had!” and are relieved to know that painless injections are possible. We also offer nitrous oxide (laughing gas) and oral conscious sedation to help those who may need additional relaxation during their visits. Fresh baked cookies and coffee or tea to enjoy before or after your appointment in a cozy reception area helps to make you feel right at home. This past November, I was privileged to have been featured on the cover of Dentistry Today, the nation’s leading professional clinical publication. As the youngest dentist to ever be featured on the cover of Dentistry Today, I follow a select number of leaders and innovators in the field of cosmetic and restorative dentistry.

I enjoy sharing my knowledge with other dentists in how I help my patients achieve a beautiful, long-lasting smile.

This past fall I was awarded another great honor, the 2018 Irwin Smigel Rising Star in Aesthetic Dentistry award. I also gave a presentation at the annual conference of the American Society for Dental Aesthetics in Nashville, where I shared my ideas and techniques with fellow members.

Our office in Clemmons is mercury safe, and we only use biocompatible materials to get not only the healthiest, but most beautiful smile our patients deserve. We are always welcoming new patients to become a part of our dental family. I hope that after reading this, you all will see that I have a passion for helping others to look and feel their best and be confident with their smile.

Dr. Wynne is currently accepting new patients and would love to hear from you. He can be contacted at 336-778-2477 or by email at info@smilesbysharon.com He is located within the office of Sharon L. Reid, DDS, 100 Stadium Oaks Dr. , Suite A, Clemmons, NC 27012 Monday-Thursday, 8-5

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Things Not to Say to Your Pregnant Friend

BY JULIE FRITZ

Pregnancy is such an exciting and special time in a woman’s life. But it can also be scary and overwhelming. It is really important to be able to surround yourself with loving friends and family to support you through it. It is also important for those loving, caring people to understand that there are certain things you should completely avoid when talking to a pregnant woman. If you find yourself in the position of being part of a pregnant woman’s inner circle, this article is for you.

ANYTHING RELATED TO WEIGHT

This is so important. Do not think, under any circumstances, that it is okay to talk about a pregnant woman’s weight. Even if she brings it up. You must be very careful to just remind her that she is beautiful.

She knows if she should be being more careful about what she is eating or if she should be exercising more. This works both ways, too. Some women are very sensitive about being told they are too skinny during their pregnancy. It is never your place to say anything about weight, NEVER! If you need specifics, here is a list of phrases to avoid.

• Are you sure you aren’t having twins?

• Do you think you should eat that?

• You’re so tiny; you don’t even look pregnant.

• You look like your ready to pop.

HORROR STORIES

Everyone knows that when you are pregnant, things can go wrong.

Most women spend a good portion of their pregnancy trying to avoid thinking about the ‘what ifs.’ It is not helpful when people want to tell you all about their scary preterm delivery, or all the time their baby spent in the NICU. It is also especially important not to tell a first-time mom how hard your labor was. They are very aware that they will have to get this baby out of their body, one way or another. Their experience will definitely be different than yours and you telling them a scary story will just add to their worry. Please remember, you are supposed to be

34 | ForsythWoman.com

supporting this person, not terrifying them. Encourage them to focus on all the exciting things going on and to not worry about something unless it becomes a problem.

ANYTHING RELATED TO GETTING PREGNANT

Even though more and more people are opening up about their journey to parenthood, some people still feel quite reserved about this topic. You never know if someone has suffered through miscarriage or infertility. This is a very private topic for some people. You should never assume you know what someone has been through. It may have taken them years to get pregnant, or they may have exhausted all their resources to pay for infertility treatments. It can be very hurtful for them to hear you say some things you wouldn’t think twice about saying. Here are a few things you should never say.

• It’s about time!

• Are you going to have more kids after this?

• Was this planned?

THOUGHTS ON HOW TO PARENT

Every baby is different, and so is every parent. Just because you feel like you have mastered the art of raising perfect children, doesn’t mean everyone feels the same way that you do about parenting. This is a topic that people get really heated about. It’s fine to give parenting advice when people ask, but never assume your pregnant friend will appreciate unsolicited advice. You don’t want to cause a rift in your friendship.

Now that you have a better idea of what not to say during this sensitive time, you are ready to be part of the support system your pregnant friends need. Pregnant women can be emotional and sensitive. It is so important to remember to lift them up and encourage them during this time. The best part is that at the end of all of this you will be rewarded by getting to be a part of a sweet little baby’s life.

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Back to Basics

BY DENISE HEIDEL

Ten years ago, Christina Johnson fell in love with cake design.

Her artistic eye coupled with an incredible gift for baking quickly gained attention. Christina’s cakes aren’t just something beautiful – they are noted for being both light and delicious.

For over a decade, Christina has taken great care and pride in making from-scratch cakes and creating memorable and edible works of art. After several years of operating a thriving homebased business, the logical next step was a bakery boutique.

For the last five years, Christina and her husband, Michael, operated a storefront, but the experience wasn’t quite what they expected. “It was a great experience, and we met some amazing people. However, we were putting in long, grueling hours. And as a family, it just wasn’t conducive to raising our boys,” said Christina.

“After five years,” she continued, “I decided not to renew the lease. It was a difficult choice, but one I had to make. It’s definitely what’s best for my family, and it came with a great added benefit – I now have the time to focus on what I love best…the cake designs!”

Christina’s Dessertery is still in business, but now operating in a home-inspected kitchen. “It’s been great to get back to the basics,” said Christina. “This is how I started my business, and I now know this is the best way for me to run the business.

“Now that I’m back in my inhome bakery, I’ve been able to devote some time to catching up on the latest trends in cake design,” Christina continued.

“The creative part of baking has always been my passion. It’s what enables me to build deeper relationships with my wonderful

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customers! I have more time to customize exactly whatever their vision may be, and bring it to fruition.”

Since the bakery business is often at the heart of so many family celebrations, this customer-connection is imperative! “I love being a part of weddings, baby showers, birthday parties, graduation, retirement celebrations, and more! Every time a family hires me to design a cake for an important event in their lives, I feel honored to be chosen.”

Christina shared, “Even though Christina’s Dessertery is a homebased business, I still offer cake by the slice, cupcakes, pastries, whole cakes, and more! All my customers need to do is follow me on Instagram and like my page on Facebook. I regularly post what flavors are available.”

Customers can even still call the same phone number! Christina’s Dessertery’s number is now attached to a cell phone, and Christina can take orders by phone or text.

“I do miss the bakery at times, but I wouldn’t trade the freedom baking from home has afforded me. With three young boys, I am so happy that I can go to soccer practice now, or watch them at Greek dances, or attend school meetings,” smiled Christina.

“As sweet at my job is, my family time is even sweeter. Now, I feel like I have the best of both worlds. My family and my career – and I love both so much.”

Christina’s Dessertery’s homebased bakery is located in Winston-Salem. Call 336.712.0300, or visit online at ChristinasDessertery.com.

Be sure to like Christina’s Dessertery on Facebook and follow the bakery on Instagram.

SWEET REVIEWS “I wish I could give Christina more than five stars! The cake she baked for me was delicious and beautiful! She’s extremely friendly and talented! Such an overall pleasant experience! I highly recommend her!” ~Theandra L. “I will definitely continue to use Christina’s Dessertery for our special occasions in the future and highly recommend her to friends and family.” ~Jamie S. “Christina was very accommodating with every request I made for the cakes and paid attention even to the tiny details to make it elegantly beautiful. Highly recommended!” ~Jeanneth R.

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Making Dollars, Making $ense Investor Influences

Securities offered through LPL Financial. Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advice offered through Marzano Capital Group, a registered investment advisor and separate entity from LPL Financial.

BY AL SEYMOUR, CHFC®, CLU®, CRPC®, CASL®, AEP®, CAP®, WEALTH MANAGER

INDIVIDUAL POLITICAL LEANINGS:

A recent article “Swedroe: Ignore Politics In Investing” by Larry Swedroe, points out that The economy is clearly doing well, with strong GNP growing, unemployment has fallen to the lowest since 1969, and inflation remains well under control.

In September, the Consumer Price Index for All Urban Consumers increased 0.1% on a seasonally adjusted basis, rising just 2.3% over the last 12 months.

The September monthly survey from Spectrem Group, however, found conflicting views based on one’s political affiliation.

With a reading of 31 to 51 considered a bullish viewpoint, the latest Spectrem Affluent Household Outlook found that Republicans rated the economy at 56. Democrats’ economic confidence rating was -31, with -31 to -51 considered the most bearish. A psychologist might diagnose this as a case of cognitive dissonance (Swedroe).

Furthering this notion, the 2009 study by Yosef Bonaparte, Alok Kumar, and Jeremy Page, “Political Climate, Optimism, and Investment Decisions,” validated the problem in that such bearish views politically influence investment decisions.

There are many things that influence how we invest our money. I will cover two influences in this article that often contribute to individuals’ different choices. The first is the difference between how we view current economics and the second is our individual political leanings

CURRENT ECONOMICS

Supply-side economics says that breaking down barriers to production, such as lowering taxes and lessening of onerous regulations, results in a larger supply of goods and services and leads to lowering of prices and improvement in living standards. Supply-siders think incentives for entrepreneurship and investment drive growth. In other words, the recent tax cut led to better incentives to invest, work, and invent. And, as long as tax rates remain low, a “permanent” change in incentives has been initiated, which will boost growth rates permanently.

There is no “fade.”

Demand-side economics argues that economic growth increases most as a function of increasing demand for goods and services, rather than increasing supply.

They argue that the best way to avert recessions and depressions is to stimulate demand by investing in largescale infrastructure projects, such as building highways.

These projects, they argue, directly increase demand for products but also put money in workers’ pockets. Workers then spend their wages, further increasing demand and encouraging businesses to increase production and hire more employees. They believe government purchases are a direct part of GDP accounting, and so it appears like government spending is a stimulus.

A new divided government adds to pressure for bipartisan legislation. Bipartisanship often means more government spending. Supply-siders will view increased government spending as a drag on growth, not a boost.

The demand-siders will think of it as a stimulus to growth.

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The survey found that almost 50% of Democrats were not investing. This compares with less than one-third of Republicans not investing.

Following is a summary of their findings: • Individuals become more optimistic and perceive the markets to be less risky and more undervalued when their own party is in power. This leads them to take on more risk.

• When the opposite party is in power, their perceived uncertainty levels increase, and investors exhibit stronger behavioral biases, leading to poor investment decisions.

• There are differences in stock preferences of investors located in highly Republican and Democratic regions—Democrats are more likely to support environmental and labor protection while opposing things like tobacco use, firearms, and defense.

SUMMARY

It is clear that one’s viewpoint on economic policies and the political climate affects investors’ views of the economy and the stock market and also impacts their investment behavior. Specifically, the returns of individual investors seek to improve when the political regime favors their political party and vice versa.

Mistakes are often made because we are unaware that our decisions are being influenced by our beliefs and biases. The first step to eliminating, or at least minimizing, mistakes is to become aware of how our decisions are impacted by our views and how those views can influence outcomes. Being aware of your biases can help you make better investment decisions.

The bottom line is that the evidence suggests that, just as investors should not let the latest economic news cause them to abandon well-developed plans (shift their asset allocation), they should not let the political climate do so either (Swedroe).

Sources: Swedroe, L. (2018, Oct. 31). Swedroe: Ignore Politics In Investing.

Retrieved from https://www.etf.com/sections/index-investor-corner/swedroeignore-politics-investing

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Resume for a Service Dog

BY ZIVA (THE WONDER DOG)

GOAL

Simply stated, my job is to make my person’s life easier by helping with daily tasks.

EXPERIENCE

My training is extensive and I can help my person in many ways. I’m not as specialized as some of my peers, like seeing eye dogs or hearing specialists; however, my job is just as important. My duties involve helping with daily routine tasks such as:

• Mobility assistance – I walk alongside my person’s wheelchair and stay close when they are able to walk to help them balance.

• Alert function – I keep a watch for times my person seems

anxious or has nightmares. While I don’t understand PTSD, I recognize the symptoms and help my person get through those feelings. I’m in-tune with my person’s emotions better than many people. I sense when things are not right, before the situation can get worse.

• Pick-up function – This may seem like nothing, but picking up

things that fall or bringing things to my person is a big help and I do it well. I can open the refrigerator and bring a bottle of water. I can help get laundry out of the dryer and put it on the bed or where it’s convenient. I can open drawers and doors for my person. I help them get up and down out of chairs and their bed. I cover my person with their blanket at naptime or at night and then go to my bed close by.

• Asking for help – I’m trained to alert others when help is needed.

• As a service dog, I go wherever my person goes – it’s the law (federal, in fact). I help my person be independent. All someone can ask is whether I’m a service dog and what services I provide; my person doesn’t need to have any papers to prove it.

EDUCATION

• I’m trained to stay focused on my person and the task at hand so that I can anticipate what my person needs and respond instantly. This was not easy to learn and I appreciate when we’re out that other people seem to know that I’m at work and don’t want to be petted or distracted.

• I was in training for two years so that I’m classified as a fully trained service dog. It cost about $25,000 for all that training.

• I learned not to be distracted by sudden noises and to keep my composure in any situation.

• I’m certified as an AKC Canine Good Citizen and have passed my Assistance Dogs International Public Access test.

CHARACTERISTICS

As a Labrador Retriever, I’m one of the typical dog breeds suited to be a service dog. My Golden Retriever buddies are also good service dogs. Some of us are bred from birth for this line of work; however, some are rescue dogs that have the characteristics to make good service dogs. We all need to be:

• Calm natured (not easily distracted) • Alert but not reactive (no running off after squirrels while on the job)

• Willing to please (I excel at pleasing my person; I hear it every day.)

• Need to be with my person – I stay close always – that’s my job

• Socialized – I can go with the flow with the best of them and adapt to any environment

• Trained easily and remember – once I learn something, it’s learned

HOBBIES

I’m off duty when my harness and collar come off. I love to do things all dogs like:

• Fetch – gotta catch that ball and

bring it back. I don’t think my person realizes what good exercise this is for them and for me; let’s keep this a secret, ok?

• Run – my yard is fenced so I can run, run, run all I want. I patrol the perimeter every chance I get to make sure no other animals invade my space.

Believe me, they hear me coming when I decide to bark a warning.

• Chill – when I relax, I relax all over

– nothing like a good long stretch.

Give me my blanket or a soft pillow and I’m out for the count. My doggy dreams are fantastical escapades of daring and victorious adventures.

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United Way

February 2019 | 41

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Take Control of Your Health with the Help of

February 2019 | 43

Known as The One That Works!®, Medi-Weightloss® offers a clinically-proven way for people to lose weight without resorting to fad diets, meal replacements, or surgery. Medical providers and compassionate counselors help patients reach a healthy weight by using evidence-based nutrition, lifestyle modification, and accountability protocols.

After preventive health screenings and evaluation, each patient receives an individualized plan based on their goal, health status, and food/exercise preferences. Prescription medication, supplements, vitamin-based injections, and metabolic testing may also be prescribed. Because the Medi-Weightloss® Program is individualized, it can help everyone – whether you want to lose 15 pounds for a special event or over 100 pounds to improve your health.

Nationwide, patients have lost over 6 million pounds combined. And the individual weight loss is just as impressive. On average, patients compliant with their program lose 6.4 pounds the first week and 14 pounds the first month.† After that, the range is 2-3 pounds per week or more.

Patients often explain that they have tried countless other attempts to lose weight and nothing worked until they found Medi-Weightloss®.

Britney from Winston-Salem tells us about her journey, saying, “I’ve struggled with my weight since I was young. As I got into my late 20s, my weight became even harder to maintain. When I moved to North Carolina in September 2016 I started packing on the pounds. I was at my absolute heaviest by the end of 2017. In December of 2017 I started working at Medi-Weightloss® and helped open the Winston-Salem location. I decided to start the program on January 3, 2018 to get rid of all the weight I had gained, and also to help inspire my patients. I felt that I couldn’t help my patients stick to the program if I didn’t go through it with them. From January 3, 2018 to July 3, 2018 I lost 46 pounds. By October 2018 I had lost 50 pounds. Since then I have maintained within 10 pounds of my total weight loss. I plan to start the program again in January 2019!”

Stories like Britney’s aren’t few and far between, in fact several patients like Carol, also from WinstonSalem, tell us about their incredible results in their inspiring testimonials. Carol explains, “I’ve tried just about every diet out there. I’m sure there are many people who have said that, and it is true for me as well. I felt like there was nothing any nutrition expert or diet coach could tell me I hadn’t already heard and tried. My weight loss journey includes many attempts and failures, and I can tell you what has worked for me. First, I had to make a personal commitment to success. No excuses.

If I was going to make it work this time, my head had to be in the game. I held responsibility for my success or failure. Second, I found a program that fit in and worked with my lifestyle. Real food and reasonable quantities allowed me to plan my daily meals, or join in to social situations without blowing it. I learned how to consume calories the right way. Third, I found a team who provided the right amount of support and encouragement. They worked with my individual lifestyle and needs to help me find success. I started the program at 228 pounds, and so far have lost 40 pounds. In addition to my weight loss, I no longer need to take blood pressure medication. Yes, it’s hard work, but combining my internal drive with a professional team that offered ideas, praise, support, and enabled my success has made this the best and most successful weight loss experience of my life.”

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Carol

Ronda

Britany

Actual Patient,

Actual Patient,

Actual Patient,

lost 40 pounds

†

Carol had it right, support and accountability are essential for weight loss success. In fact, a Medi-Weightloss® study found that cohabitating patients (married couples, roommates, family members) lose 24% more weight than those who joined the program alone. Two people who understand the power of losing weight together are husband and wife Alan and Susan. They joined the Medi-Weightloss® program together and lost a combined 142 pounds. “Medi-Weightloss® has brought us much success. Since losing weight, Alan is now taking less medication, which makes his primary care physician very happy! The staff was encouraging and helpful. They taught us how to eat healthier and we were still able to go to restaurants together,” says Susan. Susan and Alan are confident the healthy behavior changes they learned will help them keep the weight off. Medi-Weightloss® encourages you to consider asking a family member or friend to join you on your weight loss journey, their support might really make a difference.

If these stories haven’t inspired you enough, Ronda from WinstonSalem tells us “I tried many yo-yo diets over the years but I was never able to keep the weight off. After reaching a plateau, I started the

lost 32 pounds

†

lost 50 pounds

†

program at 182 pounds and with the help of the wonderful and caring staff I have lost 32 pounds. I learned how to make better food choices, and incorporated walking into my weekly routine. I really enjoyed the appointment flexibility they offered, like 7:00 am appointment times. All I can say is, if you stick to the program, it really works! I have my energy back, my blood pressure has gone down, and I was even able to run my first ever 5K!” Once you come in for your Initial Consultation you will continue with individualized weekly visits for support, motivation, and education until you reach your goal weight. Your provider will measure your progress, monitor vitals, and make changes to your plan. Our goal is to help you reach your goal and keep the weight off! If you are ready to join successful patients like these, contact the Winston-Salem Medi-Weightloss® location at 336-265-6099 today and schedule a FREE ASSESSMENT. Improve your health, increase your energy, and join our thousands of patients in feeling healthy and confident for all of 2019 and onward.

† On average, patients compliant with the Medi-Weightloss® Program lose 6.4 pounds the first week and 14 pounds the first month. Rapid weight loss may be associated with certain medical conditions and should only be considered by those who are medically appropriate. © 2019 Medi IP, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

February 2019 | 45

Try Breaking a Few Decorating Rules

“First of all, there really aren’t rules! That is, the decorating police will not arrest you for making a mistake in your décor. The neighbors might talk if you painted the whole house or-ange, and the authorities might object to a fire hazard. But most of us aren’t in danger of these extremes. What we want are a few basic guidelines for tasteful and inexpensive decorat-ing.” ~E. Barnes and Y. Brogger

As a decorator, I have my own rules of thumb when it comes to decorating. I always try to keep in mind that these are rules of thumb and guidelines for me to use….. not rules written in stone. So many times clients have told me, “I read somewhere, or someone told me that pictures should be hung at eye level.” Eye level for me, 5’ 7”, and eye level for my brother, 6’3”, are two very different levels. A rule of thumb or guideline: Artwork that will be viewed while standing, like in a hallway, should be hung approximately 60” from the floor to the middle of the height of the picture. Artwork hung in a room where people will almost always be seated should be 56” to 57” from the middle of the height of the picture to the floor. Adjust accordingly, but this is the average and should be comfortable for most people.

Preconceived decorating rules that have come from decorating books, magazines, HGTV, Pinterest, a friend, or even our mothers may need to be broken. Not long ago I came across an article that I had saved: “Decorating Rules Made to Be Broken” by Emilie Barnes and Yoli Brogger. I am sure you have heard some of these listed below and would agree….they may need to be broken.

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• “Don’t use white….it shows dirt. As long as they’re washable and bleachable, pure white slipcovers, curtains, towels, and rugs can actually be the most practical accessories of all. However, use care when making everything white because it may not always be practical.

• It all has to match. In fact, a mix of styles, colors and periods of furniture can be visually exciting. Just try to have a common element, such as a color or design motif, to tie them all together. Too much “matchy” can be boring.

• You need a round cloth for a round table.

Draped beautifully, or even tied up at the corners, a square or rectangular cloth will do just fine on any table.

• You need a sofa, a chair, and a coffee table. Try to get rid of your preconceived notions about what you “ought” to have in a room and think how the room is to be used. Remember, function is the main consideration.

• When in doubt, use beige; it goes with everything. The grain of truth in this common assumption is that neutral colors can be very relaxing and usually blend easily

with other colors. Beige is far from the only neutral! Any “earth color”…white, black, gray, brown, terra-cotta and especially green and blue….can serve the same purpose and is far more interesting.

• The sofa goes against the wall. Not always!

Instead of lining up the furniture square against the wall, you might try setting some pieces at an angle or creating small conversational groups away from the walls.

• Paint small rooms pale colors to make them look bigger. It’s not necessarily bad to paint your tiny study a dark color. The dark color can emphasize its cozy character and make it more interesting. Painting a large room a pale color can emphasize its airiness. Think of the statement you want to make, not what rules you’ve read.

• Anything goes. Break a few rules but keep in mind that the principles of balance, harmony, and comfort still prevail.”

A consultation with Ava is chock full of information you can use right away. The result is easy to live with changes that can jump-start your decorating projects while stretching your decorating dollars. Give Ava a call to schedule an appointment.

10 Reasons People Choose ReDESIGNS by Ava: 1. They’ve seen the results on TV Home makeover shows or in a friends house.

2. They want a fresh, designer look but haven’t been able to create it.

6. They are blending 2 households of furnishings and want professional help with what to keep and how to make it work.

7. They desire a home that feels good and looks good yet reflects who they are.

ReDESIGNS

by Ava 8. They want rooms to

3. They want great results without great expense.

function better.

4. They don’t know where to place the “old” furniture in a new house.

9. They want to prepare their home to maximize market appeal for a quick, top dollar sale.

5. They don’t want to make an expensive purchase they’ll regret.

10. They believe that when you want professional results you hire a professional.

Salemtowne

Ava is the ReDESIGN expert in and around Forsyth County!

Contact her to find out how you can fall in love with your home — either all over again, or for the first time!

Cell: 336.345.2929 Office: 336.712.0515 ReDESIGNSbyAva@SalemGlenCC.net ReDESIGNSbyAva.com Meet Ava on YouTube: tinyurl.com/ReDesignsByAva February 2019 | 47

Life Lessons From A Centenarian

BY DEBBIE LINVILLE, PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

It is a joy to honor the life of Hyacinth Juanita Helms Jenkins, my beloved Gran.

Born February 21, 1919, her status as a centenarian is one that few will ever attain.

With each passing year, I am more keenly aware of just how influential she has been in shaping the woman I am today. Many of my earliest memories are times I spent with her. Gran’s stories have always been peppered with humor and positivity.

Whether talking on the front porch with a mason jar of lightning bugs between us or at the formica top kitchen table eating bowls of blackberry dumplings, I hung on to her every word. Without even realizing it, I was learning how to navigate life.

Except for the time (very) early in the morning she spent alone with her well-worn Bible, cup of coffee, and “piece of quiet,” she was up and moving. As a child, I did not comprehend why she was up “before the rooster crows” when she could have slept in a little longer. I now understand.

Gran knew the key to beginning each day with an extra measure of joy and contentment was found in an active prayer life and growing her faith through God’s Word. I have followed her lead, rising early to enjoy my morning brew and ready my spirit for whatever the day holds.

UPON REFLECTION… WISE COUNSEL FROM GRAN

Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. ~Psalm 119:105 Her hands have always been busy doing for others and making the world a better place. I was (and still am) in awe of the magic she could work with her hands.

Although her factory sewing skills were limited to stitching up the toes and heels of nylon stockings, at home there were no limitations on what she created. Gorgeous dresses, ice skating outfits, Raggedy Ann and Andy dolls, and even a wedding gown with over 2000 hand sewn pearls were my favorites (yes, I still have the gown). Very recently, as a result of failing eyesight, she retired her sewing machine, and… picked up her crochet hook. Today, she is known at Mallard Ridge as the Teddy Bear Lady. To date, she has made and given away over 150 teddy bears. As she says, “There is nothing better than doing a little something to make others smile.” Most recently, those heart-warming smiles came from twenty-five children at the Ronald McDonald House.

Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people. ~Galatians 6:10 My Gran has positively impacted lives near and far across the past 100 years, but perhaps none more profoundly than the lives of her family.

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LARRY (OLDEST SON)

• Make do with what you’ve got • When you go out, always wear clean underwear • Never, ever eat yellow snow

CAROLE (LARRY’S WIFE)

• It is what it is, so just get on with it • If you feel like having a good cry, go ahead, and then set your mind on something else.

• Always forgive faults, both big and small.

• There will be bumps in the road, but beware of the potholes

RICK (YOUNGEST SON)

• If you don’t tell them, they’ll never know • When making gravy, you can get by with a can of mushroom soup • If the milk separates, you know it is powdered milk

NANCY (DAUGHTER-INLAW; RICK’S WIFE)

• Don’t drop the dumplings until the broth is at a rolling boil • If you haven’t done it right the first time, rip it out and do it over until you get it right • Don’t make waves

DEBBIE (OLDEST GRANDDAUGHTER)

• The most important things in life are not things • Treat others the way you want to be treated • The simplest things in life are best shared with the ones you love • If you look for the good in every person, you will find it

MARK (DEBBIE’S HUSBAND)

• Always use White Lily flour to make biscuits

ELIZABETH (OLDEST GREAT GRANDDAUGHTER; DEBBIE’S DAUGHTER)

• Work hard for your marriage, your family, and your paycheck • Take good care of your things no matter their cost • Follow through with what you say you will do • Learn to hold your tongue

KIM (YOUNGEST GRANDDAUGHTER)

• You don’t have to have much to be happy • Always pack a goodie bag • Even a pig with lipstick looks pretty good

RU (KIM’S HUSBAND)

• Kim’s a keeper

Listen to advice…and you will be counted among the wise. ~Proverbs 19:20

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February 2019 | 49

It’s All in a Word…

BY LEA CHURCH BRENDLE, OWNER SIMPLY STERLING & COMPANY

Let’s make a long story short, shall we?

Last summer as I was bidding a customer farewell, we strolled out the front door together and, through a random conversation about my planters out front, discovered a rock. It wasn’t an ordinary rock, it had a nicely painted word on it and it was placed there in my planter by somebody…somebody with a mission…but who? And why? And why my planter? So, I know your curiosity is there already… what’s the word you want to know…what’s the word? And who put it there? We will get to the who later.

It was an unexpected word for sure: unless.

“Unless?” we both exclaimed. What kind of word is unless? Why couldn’t it be a word like happy, or faith, or hope? But it was unless.

Unless, unless, unless… unless what? I was determined to figure it out but had nothing to go on…so I went to my computer and followed a personal instinct to google the word unless in the Bible. Several extremely pertinent scriptures to my Christian faith appeared and I was momentarily satisfied yet intrigued with my finding. This had started a bit of churning in my heart and soul.

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I shared this curious story with a few people and, like a lot of things in my life, it was passed down the line of importance by all the other life “fires” that spark in the day to day of a small business owner/ mother/wife, etc. until one day another customer came in and the journey of unless reared its quirky head again.

This particular customer whom I find to be quite striking and very classy was wearing a bracelet that seemed, for lack of a better description, almost too simple for her and not what I would have expected to see her wearing.

She explained to me that each year she picks a word that is important to her and she gets a bracelet with the word on it. In my head I am thinking are you kidding me…I need one of those and you know with what on it. This “word thing” conversation was a gentle reminder of the rock and the infamous word that so clearly spelled out…UNLESS. I quickly looked up the bracelet she had gotten for herself and decided I should order it for the store. I jumped through hoops to get it quickly and was excited about the potential. It came, and it sat. I just could not bring myself to make even the first one… so it sat. Through another odd course of events, I had been asked about doing an article for December’s magazine but in the screaming obviousness of lack of time, declined. I knew this was the story I wanted to tell, but it had not run its full course yet….so it was very timely (?) that I declined the opportunity…and it was hard to decline because who doesn’t want an extra perk with the public in December? But this story wasn’t ready to be told yet.

Fast forward through life again, because this is how it is for me…fast forward. Stop. Go. Fast forward again… and of course it’s November, so life is about to get even crazier… so no personal or quiet time for me. I say this not for pity, but to explain time’s way of stopping for no one. I’m working late one night and as I am sitting at my desk I glance down to the floor and see the bag holding the bracelet line I have been avoiding like the plague…and say to myself… “UNLESS I do it, I won’t know…” You see I am a perfectionist and on one too many occasions I have made perfect, the enemy of good. But that very moment uttering mentally the word “unless” I knew that was beyond a doubt, my word…and my moment to conquer my fear of messing up. So, I immediately reached down and the next thing I knew… I had a new, very personal bracelet on my wrist!

Oddly enough a couple of days before that I had taken a custom order for a product line that required me to scan in a fingerprint. I had taken the identikid card home to get my husband to scan it for me. As I was telling him that it was a memorial piece for a young man that had taken his own life due to bullying, it dawned on me that I never really looked at the card to know what his name was, so I walked over to the corner of my dresser where I had laid it and picked it up and read his name. My heart was pounding, and I couldn’t believe my eyes…my mind was racing… could it be? I couldn’t get the words out as to what I was doing, and my husband was becoming incensed as I frantically raced to my computer and Facebook to look see if my mind was playing tricks on me. You see, when I found the rock in September what I didn’t mention was that on the back of the rock read the words Vincent’s Legacy…. And this young man’s name was Vincent Puckett. It seemed oh, so surreal that after all this time, and mystery…here I was, making a very special gift for his mom and sister. I really didn’t have words for all the emotions I was feeling.

Funny thing, my husband says he hopes I never have to testify in court because I am the worst

with details…to me it’s more about the emotional timing of things than timeline details, so let me tell you how hard this is because thinking back on things all I can think of are the emotions I felt.

So the day came and I was on the phone with his mom, Roxane…and I asked her if I could tell her a story and I shared with her in great emotional detail what had happened and how powerfully beautiful it was to me that I had found this rock connected to the non-profit organization she had started in his honor, and that whoever put it there…put it there for me and I was meant to find it. She shared it had been her, that she had painted the rock and placed it there earlier last summer while her mom and daughter were in my store inquiring about the personalization program we offered. Strangely enough, I was off that day. I told her that, as odd as it was, the word UNLESS couldn’t have been any more perfect and that it was definitely my word. This word has stayed with me since I laid eyes on it, as has the rock.

According to the FB page, finders are supposed to take a picture of it when it’s found, share where it was found and by whom and then hide it for someone else to find…but I could not. I have held this rock with the infamous moving word UNLESS in a special place at my desk…and in my heart.

I don’t think I have ever had a word speak and move me more. I am going through a personal journey because of this rock and one day I hope to share more. As I shared with her that UNLESS was definitely my word and inquired as to why she picked it, she said it was her word, too, and that it came from a quote from The Lorax book by Dr. Seuss, and it goes “…UNLESS someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.” This was definitely a very special conversation that we shared, and I am happy to be able to share her organization, Vincent’s Legacy, KindnessRocks, #VWPLegacy through my experience.

As I reflect on this word I would like to share it with each of you as it is extremely powerful…. what UNLESS will you change in your life to be a better you, and in that, make this a better world?

Unless you smile Unless you look out for the less fortunate Unless you stand up for yourself Unless you are wise Unless you accept Jesus as your Savior Unless you try Unless you are kind Unless you are honest Unless you work hard Unless you are committed Unless you eat healthy Unless you love them unconditionally Unless you trust Unless you believe Unless you forgive Unless…

What’s your word?

February 2019 | 51

Living the Magnet Philosophy

BY TABATHA RENEGAR

I have a magnet on my refrigerator that claims, “Ever notice how What the Hell is always the right decision?!” Trust me; I recognize that this isn’t a very mature mantra to live by and it’s intended to be funny but… more times than not, it has actually proven itself out as sage advice!

For example, when in early 2017 I received an e-mail from a close friend requesting that a few of us gal-pals join her on her 40th birthday trip.

To Bali.

With girlfriends and a free place to stay for a week.

I practically tattooed the words of that magnet across my forehead! Well, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. In my heart, I said YES immediately, but in real life, there was much to consider. The impact on my family of taking such a big trip, both financially and logistically, was the primary roadblock to throwing all caution to the wind. In retrospect, I am glad that I took the time to give very thoughtful consideration to the idea. ANY big decision does indeed deserve reflection, and this was no exception. By taking time and really thinking through the opportunity, I have come out on the other side of it with a greater appreciation for the blessing that the trip truly was.

I committed to the trip and bought the airline ticket in the fall of 2017, and the journey was planned for July of 2018. How did I finally take the plunge? When I had a vision of myself as a very old woman, sitting in my rocking chair looking back at my life. Did I want to be thinking, “Remember that summer I could have gone to Bali?” Absolutely not. I owed it to my future senior self to push boundaries and accept this wonderful and adventurous gift that had been presented to me.

My husband was supportive as the months went by and planning was in full swing.

Luckily, he, too, has wanderlust so he could completely appreciate the desire to see this

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magical, far-away place that not many people get to experience. But he also did not love the idea of 30+ hours of air travel, so he wasn’t feeling sad to be staying behind.

The vacation that came together was six women spending a week in Sanur, Bali, followed by a 2nd week traveling north for the three of us that were able to stay longer.

Our home in Sanur was the amazing house of our hostess’s father and stepmom, who welcomed us all with open arms and hearts.

The journey was long, but everyone traveled smoothly, without delay or frustration and we arrived within hours of each other to a land like no other.

We were six American women, ages 40 -71.

We were made up of educators, a naturopath healer, a bakery owner, and an event planner.

We were up for anything and refused to let jet lag impede the incredible things that our hostess had planned for the week when all six of us would be together. From bicycling through the rice paddies to strolling through the famous Monkey Forest, from seaside resorts with Azul pools to the mystical beach beside the Tanah Lot temple… there was a true wonder at every turn, and we found ourselves as giddy as children at the beauty and thrills of Bali!

I must confess; I write like I talk and keeping myself to required word counts is always a challenge! And it has never been harder than when I am talking about my 2018 trip to Bali!

Writing about it brings the memories into vivid focus, and I yearn to start at day one and provide an hour-by-hour recap of what we experienced! Yet, I will wrap it up with this final summary: Say yes. Find a way. Believe that you deserve it. Whatever *it* is. Life is a beautiful and complex gift that challenges us all, can be hard at times and, at other times, even tragic.

But it can also be joyous beyond words and awe-inspiring. Keep your eyes wide open for the unexpected treasures and when in doubt, I highly recommend practicing a little “what the hell!”

Men Who Cook

February 2019 | 53

February 3rd, 1959: The Day the Music Died

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

Almost everyone knows the song by heart. “So, bye, bye Miss American Pie.” In the popular song by Don McLean, “American Pie,” refers to a sad day in our nation’s history - February 3rd, 1959. On this day, rock-n-roll singers Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, and J.P. Richardson died in a plane crash. Soon, the day would be known as “the day the music died, because of these musicians’ impact on the world.

The three singers were with their bands on the “Winter Dance Party” tour in the Midwest. Holly chose to charter a plane to their next venue. Sick with the flu, Richardson decided to go for comfortable travel and swapped places with country singer Waylon Jennings.

Along with it being winter, weather conditions were poor and caused the pilot to lose control of the aircraft. Everyone on board died when the plane crashed into a cornfield. Since that day, the singers have been remembered through various films and songs, including the song “American Pie.” As mentioned above, Don McLean was inspired by this day to write the classic tune from Holly’s death. When Holly died, McLean was only 13 years old and already a Buddy Holly fan. Once McLean called Holly’s death a “personal tragedy,” because of his deep connection with the singer. In fact, the original back cover of the album states “Dedicated to Buddy Holly.” During an interview on the UK show, Songbook, McLean stated “that for some reason I wanted to write a big song about America and about politics, but I wanted to do it in a different way. As I was fiddling around, I started singing this thing about the Buddy Holly crash. Then, the lyrics ‘Long, long time ago, I can still remember how that music used to make me smile,’” just came out.

Even though Holly is the biggest influence, the song “American Pie” is filled with references to pop culture and famous celebrities, including the ones below. However, McLean hasn’t disclosed who else is remembered by the song’s lyrics, but listeners have made guesses as to what lyric is talking about who.

• The Beatles Sgt. Pepper Lonely Hearts Club Band album is said to have influenced McLean and the lyrics “sergeants played a marching tune.”

The songs on the Beatles’ album stand for a darker, more hostile time in music and politics during the 1960s.

• “When the jester stole his thorny crown, in a coat he borrowed from James Dean,” is probably referring to Bob Dylan. The songwriter and singer is said to have stolen Elvis Presley’s place as the number one performer and wore a red jacket, similar to James Dean’s jacket, on the cover of The Freewheeling Bob Dylan. Lastly, the next lyric “and a voice that came from you and me” is often said to be referring to Dylan’s folk style of singing.

• The 1960s peace marches are alluded to in “and we sang dirges in the dark, the day the music died.”

• “Eight miles high and falling fast” is likely discussing The Byrds’ hit “Eight Miles High.”

• The death of Janis Joplin in 1970 is quoted in the line “I met a girl who sang the blues and I asked her for some happy news.”

• The 1958 hit by the Monotones, “Book of Love,” was described in “did you write the book of love?”

• Lastly, but definitely not all, some say the line “and moss grows fat on our rolling stone” is credited to Mick Jagger’s concert appearance or Buddy Holly’s “Early in the Morning” song.

Every time people listen to the song, they will discover something different in the lyrics. But, one thing is for certain, that Buddy Holly was the inspiration for the beloved song, “American Pie.”

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February 2019 | 55

Exploring the Connection Between Dogs & Humans

BY ELISA W. COPPEDE

There is nothing like the bond that occurs between a dog and their “human.” Ask any dog owner how incredible it feels to have their companion greet them after a day at work, accompany them on a long stroll, or simply snuggle with them at night. Having a dog provides love and companionship to all. However, why this union is so tight? Why are we as humans choosing specifically to snuggle a dog and not a plant?

From a psychological standpoint, the relationship between a dog and owner is incredibly interesting and involves a variety of factors.

First off, there is a special chemistry that goes back thousands of years. It is even said that this relationship has shaped the way our brain developed. This could be due to the fact that this companionship began at a time when humans themselves were evolving and changing.

THE BEGINNING HISTORY OF THIS UNION

Our past with dogs goes farther back than our history with domesticated livestock, including sheep and cows. Research and evidence has been found that supports dogs and humans living together as far back as 13,000 years! How did this begin?

Considering that the dog is descendent of the wolf, we need to first look at this animal for answers.

Initially, packs of wolves would follow humans, looking for food scraps. After a good deal of time, the friendlier wolves approached the humans, who in turn took them in as companions. The bond was mutually beneficial—humans could provide shelter and protection, and wolves could help bring down prey.

These “friendly wolves” were eventually bred with other friendly ones. Eventually, this was how dogs came to be. What is interesting about this, is that dogs evolved alongside humans, so they are able to connect with us on a deeper level than many animals today.

A SCIENTIFIC LOOK AT THE BOND

There is much to be said about the effect of humans on dogs, but there is just as much to be said about their effect on us. Recent research has found that looking into a dog’s eyes activates the same hormonal response that bonds humans to their babies. Further research from Azabu University in Japan helped confirm this finding.

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Thirty dog owners and a few wolf owners were brought in for an experiment.

Owners were asked to stare into the eyes of the animals for a set period of time. Afterward, the scientists collected urine samples from all participants before and after the study. The fascinating result was that the dogs who stared the longest into their owner’s eyes experienced a 130 percent rise in oxytocin levels—the chemical associated with the feeling of happiness—with the owners experiencing a whopping 300 percent rise in oxytocin. Contrary to this finding, none of the wolf-owner duos experienced an increase in oxytocin. Which could be because their bond is different from the one formed between a dog and human. All in all, this is one scientific finding which illustrates why we feel so attached to our furry companions.

DOGS AND BABIES

When it comes to dogs and babies, the bond is just as strong—if not stronger. According to the American Kennel Club, dogs can easily sense that babies are harmless and vulnerable based on their owners’ actions around them. This said, most are extra cautious when around the little ones.

Considering that dogs are “pack animals,” they become protective of the newest arrival and want to go above and beyond to protect this one. This can be shown through sitting nearby the baby (guarding the baby) to licking the baby’s face or rear end (which is how they check their own little one’s health).

DOGS AND THE ELDERLY

It is obvious that dogs have a great healing power on humans. Dogs have an astounding positive effect on those grappling with depression, anxiety, and other emotional disorders. Considering this, it is easy to make the connection on the positive effect dogs can have on the elderly.

Not only does having a dog around an elderly person boost their mood, they also can help them complete a variety of tasks. From helping relieve their anxiety in social situations, to helping them navigate from one place to another. There has been a great increase of the use of service dogs for seniors suffering from debilitating physical diseases.

According to the article, “The Healing Power of Pets for Seniors,” psychologist Penny B. Donnenfeld, has witnessed animals’ ability to prompt better memory recall in their elderly owners. “I’ve seen those with memory loss interact with an animal and regain access to memories from long ago,” she explains. By having a pet, the senior can now focus on something other than their physical problems and negative preoccupations about aging.

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February 2019 | 57

The Year of the Pig February 5th

We often think of horoscopes as untrue generalized statements about one of the twelve Western astrological signs that correspond with the birthdate of an individual. Different than the constellations, with names such as Pieces, Leo, and Libra, for instance, there is another form of astrology derived from the Chinese, based not a month, but an animal sign for each year of a twelve-year cycle. People who are born within the same lunar timeline have similar characteristics and fortune. Starting on the 23rd day of the 12th lunar month, the Chinese celebrate the New Year, also known as the Spring Festival; therefore, on Tuesday, February 5th, 2019, the Dog Year will end and the Pig Year begins.

THE RAT WON THE RACE

According to Chinese legend, the order of the 12 animals derives from folklore dating back to 200 BC. The Jade Emperor devised a tournament of the animals, enticing them to win a spot on the calendar by coming to the kingdom. Crafty rat left his friend cat behind, jumped onto ox’s back, who didn’t mind the rat as his opponent, and carried him. Sadly, ox came in second. Distracted by eating, pig arrived last, and cat, not at all.

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

CHARACTERISTICS OF THE PIG

The previous years of the pig were in 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007, and will not be celebrated again until 2031. These distinct years may provide you with an understanding of the characteristics of those born under the 12th year. The Chinese are preparing for a year of flexibility, intuitiveness, and happiness.

Although the pig is symbolic of wealth, his chubby face and large ears have a connection to good fortune. Characteristically, the pig enjoys life, his family, and its rewards, which requires the need for strong organizational practices and hard work. Not all “Pig Years” are the same.

Variances imposed by the four moon phrases - new and waxing moon, full and waning moon - change with their generation. As the universe and its creatures regularly cycle, natural elements such as metal, water, wood, fire, earth, and back to water influence destiny and fortune.

In 2019, the Earth has the potential to stabilize or fix problems. It reminds believers to remain aware of priorities such as friends, work, and finances; otherwise, the year may result in losses.

THE FRIENDS OF PIG

Warm-hearted and honest, the people born under the pig sign have set a high value on friendship. It seems that whenever a friend is in need, they will help without hesitation. Considering Chinese astrology comprises 12 animal signs, pig people are most compatible with protective and warm loving tigers, intelligent yet quiet rabbits, and harmonious with goats. While pigs treat all he or she meets warmly, clashing personalities make it difficult for a friendship with certain types. Pigs are generally amiable among others, but they struggle most with the smart and cunning snake and monkey people.

THE CHINESE NEW YEAR

Preparation for the Spring Festival eve is a time of house cleaning and decorations. Red posters adorned with poetic verses may hang on doors while celebratory pictures of previous New Year pictures of a fish, lantern, or firecracker decorate the walls.

Homes also feature red lanterns, a symbolic message which “pursues the bright and the beautiful.” Aspiring windfalls of luck, fireworks or firecrackers may be set to cast away misfortune, or the intention of money by receiving little red envelopes containing “lucky money.” Reuniting with relatives, family members wear new clothes to inspire a prosperous year to come. Festivities include beating drums, striking gongs, and performing the traditional dragon and lion dances.

INVESTING TIME IN CHINESE ASTROLOGY

Beyond the curiosity to know the name of your animal sign and its characteristics, researching Chinese astrology may give you a personal understanding of self and close and complicated relationships. A connection to worship heaven and earth 4000 years ago through lunar months, the moons, and a chart of animals couldn’t necessarily be wrong.

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February 2019 | 59

This Helps – How?

BY VONDA HENDERSON

Technology is a wonderful thing. We can agree on this certainly. But for those of a certain generation, we’ve lived through some drastic, dramatic changes.

LET’S START WITH THE WORKPLACE.

Who remembers learning to type on manual typewriters with carbon paper by the box full to make those increasingly smudgy duplicates? The keys were a nightmare; they jammed once you got going at a fast rate on a regular basis until you developed a rhythm.

Then years later, we transitioned to electric typewriters with those interchangeable font balls --- wow, how could things get better? But they did. Enter the desktop computers. Now that was a true learning curve. Typing on a screen (the first ones were black with green letters, remember?), then sending your work to a central printing area. If something was confidential, it was a finish line dash to get there before the job started printing. And finally, to laptops. Timesaving, portable, user-friendly.

All true. But your office can go everywhere you go now, especially if you’re one of those ‘I take my laptop home every night types.’ Honestly, do you really fire it up every night? Give yourself, and your family, a break and leave it at work where it belongs at least a few times a week. And, laptops do not need a vacation! You, on the other hand, definitely need one. Uncurl those typing fingers and go fishing, play in the sand, play golf, shop – enjoy some sunshine with your family.

CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL DATA?

Have you invested in a home shredder? Perhaps more than one? A family friend, we’ll call her Jean, shared that there are currently four home shredders waiting for large bulk pick-up at her home. They all succumbed to being overstuffed and jammed beyond their capacity to chew up more than four pages at a time. Patience is a virtue but not when watching paper crawl leisurely through the shredder teeth evidently. Really, who wants to hunch over a shredder and feed it endless stacks of paper?

Thankfully, the recent fundraising trend of mobile shredding events has emerged to save the day. Just load up all that stuff that you don’t want to just trash and take it to one of these events for a donation. It’s a time-saver for you, your private data, and a help to a worthwhile cause. Check social media for shredding events nearby.

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NOW TO THE KITCHEN AND ALL THOSE TIMESAVING TOOLS AND APPLIANCES.

Don’t you love that current commercial when the child asks ‘What does the dishwasher do?’ It’s really a valid question. We all know, or are, those folks who clean the dishes to spotlessness before loading them into the dishwasher. Isn’t that what it’s supposed to do? And, we’ve all learned that painful lesson of not putting Tupperware in the bottom rack, right? How many lidless bowls are stacked in your cabinet waiting on a match?

What’s the worst chore in the kitchen? If it’s emptying the dishwasher, join the crowd. Do you sometimes just fill the sink with suds and enjoy hand-washing dishes in a quiet kitchen?

Why’s it quiet? Because nobody wants to help.

You have a little time to yourself!

And the small appliances that are designed to save so much time that end up as one-use wonders! Remember the first crockpots – those hunter green (the color alone is a giveaway) pots that plugged in and cooked a roast with all the trimmings overnight? They worked great for sure, but cleaning them was a mess! The power cord didn’t detach so you ended up rolling the thing all over the counter to get the food residue out. Thankfully, manufacturers recognized this issue and redesigned them with lift-out pots.

That improvement alone makes them practical for daily use to this day.

Microwave ovens are a staple in most homes.

However, their convenience factor has a side issue — less home cooking and more on-the-run meals. It’s a win-win but don’t you enjoy putting an entirely homemade meal together once in a while? Dust off one of those cookbooks on the shelf and have a family night of cooking together. Isn’t that the premise behind many of those home-delivery cooking options that are so popular these days?

Yes, technology has its place and its benefits.

Just don’t let it run you. Pick where it can help and where you’d just as soon do it yourself!

Kim Taylor & Co.

Footnote

February 2019 | 61

Online Real-ationships and Romance:

Pros and Cons of Online Dating, Dating Sites and Dating Apps

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

TAKING REJECTION

Thankfully, with online dating, it’s easy not to take rejection personally. If someone’s not your type and turns you down, you can always just move on to the next person’s profile.

Ever want to go into hibernation mode and take a break from online dating? On some sites, you can freeze your account and come back later. This often means your profile will not be visible or active, but you can always reactivate it with the click of a button. It’s just that easy to deactivate your account.

You may have heard it tons of times before, just like a broken record: Don’t look for love; it’ll find you. But, when and how?

Maybe it’s time you took matters into your own hands and did some soul searching for your soul mate.

Maybe it’s time to take a proactive approach in looking for your date/mate and start the search online! There are lots of success stories out there of matches that have been made online, via a dating site or dating app.

SEARCH FOR MR. RIGHT

Longing and looking for a relationship, but need help finding him? You know…Mr. Right… he’s out there somewhere, right?

Perhaps, he’s online! Maybe you’ve run through your family’s and friends’ suggestions for finding potential dates and mates and still can’t seem to find anyone right. Maybe you’ve been to many meet-up groups and lots of social events, but still can’t seem to connect with the right person.

Maybe you should give online dating a try!

EXPLORE THE OPTIONS

If you’re keen on variety, online dating is the way to go. You can choose from a pool of peoples’ profiles, based on factors like demographics and preferences.

Whatever your likes and preferences, explore all the dating world has to offer by getting on a dating site or phone app.

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PROS OF ONLINE DATING

• The online dating world is filled with lots of options • Start your online profile in seconds • Online dating sites and apps are sometimes free or reasonably priced • You can talk in your PJs from home or wherever • You’ll enjoy the ease of online communications • Online dating is convenient whether at home or on the go • You can meet people locally or across the globe

CONS OF ONLINE DATING

• Sometimes you have to weed through a lot of profiles • You can’t always verify if matches are legit • Online communication can’t replace that in-person connection • It may be unsafe to meet in person and there’s the possibility of being lied to

STAY SAFE

So what about safety and security? Some sites have moderators that can remove fake profiles and conduct background checks to verify. Some offer 24/7 support and help pages. There may be SSL encryption technology to prevent scammers and spammers from entering the site.

However, these security features may not be enough and the rest is up to you. To address safety concerns, always meet in a public place the first time, and tell at least one trusted person of your whereabouts. Be sure to tell them your destination, contact information and any other details.

GET REAL AND FACT CHECK

Make sure on Facebook and other social media platforms that the information on your date appears to be true and real. Check for consistency. If you know someone who knows him, find out what they think and verify that what you think you know is true.

POPULAR SITES AND PHONE APPS TO EXPLORE SITES: Match.com, EliteSingles.com, Zoosk.com, OkCupid.com, EHarmony.

com, Marriage.com, Flirt. com, PlentyofFish.com, CoffeeMeetsBagel.com, AdultFriendFinder.com, Anomo. com, SingleandShy.com, Bumble. com, OurTime.com, and BlackPeopleMeet.com.

PHONE APPS: Match Elite, Singles, Zoosk, Silver Singles, Single Parent Meet, Tinder, Happn, Raya, Ok Cupid, Bumble, Plenty of Fish (POF), The League, Double, Badoo, Do I Date, Now, How About We, Tin Dog, Now, Hinge, Our Time, Black People Meet.

With online dating, there are unlimited options, and if you aren’t successful with finding the right match on one site or app, move along to another. Don’t give up on the search for Mr. Right. Just jump online and get connected. Who knows where it may lead?!?!

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Your Happy Chemicals & How To Trigger Them

BY TABI FALCONE

Have you ever sat and wondered where happiness comes from? Not what types of acts bring us happiness per se, but the biology behind why we actually feel the joy of happiness as human beings. While that can be an incredibly complex answer to solve that may require a doctoral degree in neuropsychology, there are four little chemicals that are crucial to the feelings of happiness that we feel in our lives.

These four chemicals are known as the “happy chemicals,” and it’s a great life skill to learn how to trigger them.

ENDORPHINS

Probably the most well-known “happy chemical,” endorphins are famous in modern society for being triggered by exercise. This happy feeling brought on by exercise-induced endorphins is what many fit people know as the “runner’s high.” While most types of exercise will trigger the release of endorphins into your body, cardiovascular exercise (such as running) and aerobics have been the types shown to release the highest amount. While exercise can’t (and should not) replace medication for many people, steady exercise has been shown to help with the treatment of mild forms of depression. While exercise is the most commonly known way to release endorphins, hot peppers can also be a trigger for this particular hormone.

OXYTOCIN

Oxytocin is a hormone that is all about social bonding and physical touch. Also known as the love hormone, oxytocin is released when you hug and kiss another person, as well as through other physical contact. It can also be produced by spending quality time with people you care about, by being in close proximity to them. One of the most interesting ways to trigger the release of oxytocin is available only to women: through childbirth and breastfeeding. This release helps to foster the mother-child relationship and build a solid foundation of love during that formative time. This bonding is why some adoptive mothers of young babies will actually work with a doctor to induce the production of breastmilk.

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DOPAMINE

When you are engaging in an activity you know will have a reward that you are looking forward to, the happy-go-lucky feeling you get in anticipation of this reward is causing by the release of dopamine. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that is responsible for the success of behavior modification with rewards. You know those rats that will do tricks for a piece of cheese? That is all thanks to dopamine. So how can we trigger this one on our own? By setting yourself up with goals that you know you will get a reward for, you can help increase your release of dopamine. While the science behind it is somewhat uncertain, some scientists also believe that eating foods high in tyrosine can trigger dopamine releases. Tyrosine can be found in high-protein foods such as cheese, chicken, turkey, eggs, and beans, among others.

SEROTONIN

Serotonin is considered a happy chemical because it has been shown to help regulate moods, as well as having a direct correlation between depression and low levels of serotonin (though it’s uncertain if the low serotonin causes the depression or the other way around). In fact, SSRIs, which are a type of medication used to treat depression and other mental illnesses, work by increasing serotonin production in the body. Melatonin, the hormone which helps humans sleep, is created directly from serotonin. One of the easiest ways to help produce serotonin is by exposure to bright natural light. You want to up your serotonin levels and increase your happiness? It can be as simple as taking a walk outside in the sunshine.

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At Home Date Ideas

BY TABI FALCONE

Time is something that most adults don’t have an abundant source of, which can have the unfortunate effect of significantly decreasing the ability to have regular date nights. Time aside, many of us don’t have the funds for going out on the town more than once a month. While many couples often fall into the trap of doing the same thing night after night, it’s important to try to increase the frequency of date nights while mixing the activities up a bit to avoid boredom. Here are a few ideas for date nights that you can do at home at little to no cost.

COOK-OFF CHALLENGE

Make like the show “Chopped” and turn your kitchen into a flurry of excitement by creating an at home cooking competition. Just like on the show, pick three random ingredients, and each person needs to create their own dish using those ingredients and whatever else you have in your kitchen. Have a taste test (and probably a good laugh) and grade each other on your imagination, taste and plating techniques.

WINE AND PAINT NIGHT

While most people go out for this type of date night, it is so much easier to replicate at home than many people realize. Most craft stores have pre-made “painting sets” (often in the children’s section if you aren’t picky) that include a small sample of paint and brushes, a canvas and an easel. You can also purchase these items separately for a limited cost. One way to approach this is to research your own painting project (Pinterest is a great tool for this) and just hang out and paint. Another really fun option is to pull up a Bob Ross video on YouTube and follow along!

Either way, make sure to pour yourself a glass of wine and enjoy the creativity together.

WRITE OUT YOUR BUCKET LIST AS A COUPLE

For those who don’t know, a bucket list is a list of things you want to do before you die, or “kick the bucket.” Everybody has one of these, whether you physically have it written down or not, and it’s really fun to write one out with your spouse.

Discuss the things you want to do together as a couple in your time together.

These can be as simple as wanting to take a tango class together, or as extravagant as wanting to hike in the Himalayan Mountains.

When you write it all

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out, hang it up somewhere in your house and cross things off as you go, making sure to add more things on there as you think of them.

DINNER DATE AT HOME

Just because you aren’t going out to a fancy dinner doesn’t mean you can’t have a fancy dinner at home. Pick out a menu together, multiple courses if you’re feeling fancy, and get all dolled up just like you would if you were going out. If you have fancy candlesticks, this is the time to pull those bad boys out. Challenge yourselves to cook something that isn’t normally on your menu and is a higher caliber than what you would normally eat at home, like herb-crusted lamb chops with candied Brussels sprouts, finishing with a chocolate soufflé. Put on some jazz music and enjoy.

TRUTH OR DARE JENGA

While you can purchase these from several different retailers, it is much more fun (and cheaper) to make them yourself. Simply pick up a Jenga set and split up all the pieces between the two of you, pulling out a few to mark as “FREEBIES.” On half of the pieces left, write “Dare:” and fill in a dare such as “I dare you to perform Baby Shark.” On the other half write “Truth:” and fill in a truth question such as “If you could have a superpower, what would you have and why?” The “FREEBIES” are like wild cards, and the person who pulled the block can choose truth or dare, and the opposite player gets to come up with a truth or a dare for them. You’ll end up having a ton of laughs and learning more about each other.

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February 2019 | 69

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

The universal principles of chivalry when it comes to dating are presently facing extinction! Fiction presents acts of gallantry from charming characters such as Mr. Darcy or James Bond, which not only made the fictitious female swoon and bat her eyes in modest appreciation, but influenced the reader to want a similar dining experience. Although the dinner date has drastically changed, you, too, can encourage aspects of chivalry and table etiquette at your next meal.

7. Ordering: Keep it simple. Messy food such as pasta, seafood, and

READY TO WOO YOUR DATE? 1. Appearance: First impressions matter whether your date is a

8. Establish Boundaries: Conversation can feel awkward when

2. Silence the Ringer: Before you arrive to greet your dinner

9. Napkins and Eating: Open your napkin immediately and place

spouse, significant other, or someone you are meeting for the first time. Comfort plays into the outfit, which must be both smart and make you feel great.

date, silence your ringer. The dinner date emphasizes your complete attention on the individual and conversation. As tempting as it may be, do not pick up or check your phone.

3. Arrive on Time: Punctuality is a valued characteristic that most

people appreciate. Arriving late sets a negative tone to the start of an evening.

4. Practice Acts of Chivalry: Society has come to a point where

it is now considered polite to ask whether a car door can be opened.

It is a kind gesture to accept the offer. Additionally, it is a form of courtesy to hold a date’s arm and walk together. Usually, men stand on the side facing traffic to protect his paramour from danger.

5. Greetings: A question may arise on how to greet your dinner

date, especially if he is unknown. Introductions with a handshake and warm smile are acceptable. A closer relationship may receive a hug or air kiss on both cheeks, which is sweet without crossing any lines of expectation.

6. Sitting Down: Always approach your seat from the left side.

Place handbags on the floor to your right. As you leave your chair, it will be easy to grab your handbag and exit on the same side.

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salad can pose problems. Choose a meal that is simple to eat, not expensive, and can endure an ongoing conversation. Allow your date to order your preference. And, if you enjoy wine, only accept one glass. It is polite not to make additional requests such as a cup of coffee, tea, or dessert. The evening may extend at a coffee shop or preferred location with amazing desserts.

speaking to a newly met individual. Show interest in your date and be an active listener. Reveal only tidbits about yourself. If the night goes well, you’ll have additional opportunities to share information and learn more about your date.

it across your lap. A group may wait until the host begins to unfold his or her napkin. It is a kind gesture to wait until the act of serving dinner is over before picking up your fork. Other tips: • Never reach across the table; instead, ask for items on the table.

• Always pass the salt and pepper together.

• If food is too hot, sit patiently and wait until the food cools.

• Cut only one to two bites at a time.

• Keep elbows off the table and rest the hand you are not using in your lap.

• The act of placing a napkin to the left of a plate indicates a completion of the meal.

10. Leaving the Table: Never announce your reason to leave

the table; instead, place your napkin to the right of the plate, say, “excuse me,” and exit from the right side.

11. Paying: The check goes to the person, who made the invitation to dinner. A date can offer to pay the tip, 20% of the total bill; however, the date is by no means obligated. Sharing expenses should be arranged well before the date begins.

12. Depart by Stating Kind Words: At the end of the

evening, a date should verbalize words of thankfulness for the evening and meal.

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Pric Medi M do it l g n l a i i a t c i e o c k o S keting Pri SellinLet’s r S a g M g One Crafty Miss ty Sellin ar M g n i g d n n i a d r n y i t B a v ducti ne Br o i r l e P m Productivi l Media Timeline i g T n i c i a r i icing r d P e P M g a n g i l i c n t o a i e t i S e c k r o k Ma Mar ng S i g n l g Selling i l n e i d n S d n a r a r y B t B i ne ivity e iv t t i n c c l i u u e l e d d m o o i m r r i T P T P a icing edia icing r r Medi M P P l a g g i n n c i i o t t Social e e S k k r r g g a a n n i Sign Up Now for Your Free ConnectionSCall www.onecraftymiss.com/coaching i M M l l l l e e g g S n n vity randi i t ivity B Brandi t c c e u u n d i d o l o r e r mel P i m P i T T g g n n a i i c i a c i i d i r r e d Taryn Jerez | Taryn@onecraftymiss.com e P M ing ial M al www.onecraftymiss.com t c i e o c k o S keting P OneSeCrafty r S a g M n g i n Miss, LLC l i Ma g l l e l in S g d n n i a y d r t n y i t B a v i r i v t e i c B n t c i u el eline Prod Tim@One m Produ @onecraftymissblog i g T a n i i c d i a e r i ici r d M P Crafty Miss @0necraftymiss e P l M g a n g i l i c n t o a i e t i S e c k r o k Ma Mar ng S i g n l g Selling i l n e i d n S d n a r a r y B t B i uctiv line e d meline o i m r i T T P a i g a n i d i e c d M l Me a i ng Pri c i o t e S k r g a n i M Sell y t i v i Branding t c u d Pro g n i c i r P g ketin I help Makers and Creatives make more money doing what they love through one-on-one coaching and personalized strategy sessions! I help you get clear in your vision and confident in the steps you’re taking toward your goals to turn give you a business your customers can’t get enough of!

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February 2019 | 71

Caring for Your Hair the Natural Way

BY LISA S.T. DOSS

Thirty ingredients comprising an average bottle of shampoo certainly defies the philosophy behind simple living. As creatures of habit, the smell of botanical extracts is often vital to the reason a band name remains in our showers for years. Shampoos, surprisingly, are among the most frequently reported products to the FDA. Reports claim symptoms of eye and scalp irritation, and swelling of the hands, face, and arms, which are characteristics of commonly used chemical-based foaming detergents found in soaps, shampoos, toothpastes, and other products. There are safer and inexpensive alternatives to help you eliminate dangerous chemicals, including sodium laureth sulfate, SLES, from your beauty products.

SLS FREE SHAMPOOS

A flaky scalp, presumed to be dandruff, most likely was a result of SLES. One solution is to find a comparable smelling SLS (sodium lauryl sulfate)-free shampoo. You’ll be surprised at how easy it is to find a healthy shampoo that revitalizes the sheen and shine.

Tip: Be aware of preservatives listed as parabens, fragrances termed parfum, and additional detergents such as cocamidopropyl betaine, ammonium lauryl sulfate, and cocamide DEA and MEA.

DIY NATURAL

Many individuals have invested time in the movement to make shampoos and conditioners. While saving on cost, users of natural ingredients noticed a difference in texture, frizz, and tangles. A do-it-yourself shampoo may be a treat once a month to eliminate product build-up or a new approach in your daily routine.

Ingredients: ¼ cup coconut milk (canned milk or grade fresh

coconut and freeze the unused meat), 1/4 cup liquid Castile soap, and approximately 15 drops of a preferred essential oil such as peppermint or rosemary and orange. It is recommended for dry hair to add a ½ teaspoon of olive or almond oil. (Holds up well in a clean container for four weeks in a cool and dry location.) Shake the bottle before using.

Benefit of Coconut Milk: It contains vitamins, iron, calcium,

FIXING PROBLEMS

It may not take an expensive product to revitalize lifeless hair. By adding ½ cup apple cider vinegar to two cups of water, for instance, the outcome offers an enhanced shine and eliminates hair breakage.

Additional solutions are:

Static: Streak small

amounts of coconut oil through your hair, avoiding the scalp, and allow to saturate for 15 minutes before rinsing.

Oiliness: Beat two teaspoons of freshly squeezed lemon or vinegar to two egg yolks. Allow to set for five minutes and rinse in warm water.

Anti-Dandruff:

Before applying two tablespoons of coconut oil to two drops each of lemon and camphor oil, heat until warm.

Massage into scalp for five minutes in the late evening and wash with a mild shampoo in the morning.

Split Ends: Mix equal amounts of olive oil, lemon juice, and water.

Massage into a damp scalp and leave in for 15 minutes before rinsing and shampooing with mild soap. (Limit lemon juice treatments to twice a month.)

magnesium, and phosphorus to promote hair growth and strengthen hair while acting as a deep conditioner.

Benefit of Coconut Oil: While penetrating individual strands of hair

Ingredients: 1 cup of soft water to one tablespoon of baking

Benefit of Olive Oil: Rich in Vitamins A, E, and antioxidants, it

soda. This combination is intended as a clarifying shampoo to remove buildup. It has the potential to dry the hair and scalp; therefore, use as needed.

Conditioner Ingredients: 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar (use a brand which includes “the mother” and one cup of soft water. This recipe makes eight ounces. Shake the spray bottle before using. Massage into hair for a minute before rinsing.

Afterward, you will not smell of vinegar.

Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar: Unfiltered ACV is an

excellent natural hair treatment. It is cleansing, gives the hair more body, and reduces hair-loss.

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to improve scalp health, coconut oil also promotes hair growth.

protects the keratin within the strands of hair and seals in moisture.

AND, THERE’S MORE!

Patience is a critical factor in adopting the new habit of creating personalized hair care solutions. Be aware, some combinations may not work for your hair type or texture. Try changing the recipe or vary the combination until you can find the right natural remedy for your needs.

You may discover this particular life-changing decision is beneficial.

Beyond DIY shampoos and conditioners, consider replacing other chemical-based products such as face and mouthwash, deodorant and toothpaste, and dishwashing and laundry soap with natural ingredients.

The savings and ease are worth it!

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, s c i l o h o c Cho ice!

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Chocolate is shown to support a healthy brain and reduce the risk of cognitive decline. One study of healthy volunteers showed that eating highflavanol cocoa for five days improved blood flow to the brain. The flavonols in dark chocolate can protect against sun damage, improve blood flow to the skin and increase skin density and hydration.

From the seed of the cocoa tree comes chocolate, an antioxidant-rich treat to savor and enjoy. Chocolate! It’s rich, melts in your mouth and has just the right amount of sweet to satisfy your sugar cravings. Who knew that such a delectably delicious and sweetly sumptuous candy could also be really healthy for you? For those who like a healthier sweet treat, get rid of the guilt and indulge in a piece of dark chocolate.

NUTRIENT-RICH

A fan of chocolate? Want to know why this candy is so packed with nutritional health benefits? You can enjoy one ounce or so of chocolate a couple times a week to reap the best of benefits from your favorite sweet treat.

Dark chocolate is nutrient-rich and includes a soluble fiber and also contains iron, magnesium, copper, manganese, and potassium. A 100-gram bar of dark chocolate with 70–85% cocoa contains plenty of potassium, phosphorus, zinc and selenium. Dark chocolate is also filled with organic compounds, such as antioxidants, polyphenols, flavanols and catechins.

CAFFEINE IN CHOCOLATE

Dark chocolate does contain caffeine, though a smaller amount when compared with the caffeine in coffee, but caffeine is only found in traces in milk chocolate. Cocoa contains the stimulant substances, caffeine and theobromine, which may be why dark chocolate is believed to improve brain function in the short term.

THE HEALTH FACTOR

We know it’s yummy, but is it really healthy? That’s what they say! From increasing your circulation to preventing depression, diabetes, cardiovascular disease, and stroke, the pros far outweigh the cons. Dark chocolate can also lower blood pressure and reduce cholesterol.

Dark chocolate can reduce insulin resistance, which is a precursor for diabetes and heart disease. It may also reduce the risk of heart disease, while causing much less cholesterol to form in the arteries. The fat in chocolate comes from cocoa butter and is made up of oleic acid, a hearthealthy monounsaturated fat also found in olive oil.

A study revealed that eating chocolate two or more times per week lowered the risk of calcified plaque in the arteries by 32%. And, another study showed that eating dark chocolate more than 5 times per week lowered the risk of heart disease by 57%.

A BRIEF HISTORY

Historically, Mayan and Aztec civilizations valued chocolate (cacao) as a “gift from the gods.” The passion for chocolate began when it was a highly prized, strong, hot, and bitter drink.

Chocolate was considered a luxury item and was a very expensive import.

The cocoa press was invented in the mid-19th century and, subsequently, chocolate production become popularized, even revolutionized.

Richard Cadbury, of the English chocolate making family, invented the first Valentine’s Day candy box during the Victorian era, and Cadbury’s was the first chocolatier to promote giving heart-shaped boxes on this special occasion.

WHAT TO TRY

A lot of commercial chocolates are highly processed, so be sure to look out for chocolate that says “processed with alkali” because that process produces fewer flavanols.

Here are some brands of dark chocolate to try: Ghiradelli, Godiva, Lindt, Pascha, Endangered Species, Alter Eco, Taza, Green & Blacks, Pure7, Theo, ChocoLove, Palcari, Valrona, Amano, Moser Roth, Loving Earth, Vivani, Ritter Sport, Giddy Yoyo, Sharffen Berger, Righteously Raw, Sweet Riot, Lily’s, ChocZero, Notable Mentions.

GET GIFT GIVING

For Valentine’s Day, which one would you rather get as a gift? Red roses or dark chocolate? Go for dark chocolate if you want to benefit your health, and spread the love by sharing chocolate with your loved ones this Valentine’s.

And, get that happy feeling, almost like being in love, with the release of neurotransmitters like phenylethylamine and serotonin. Chocoholics, rejoice!

74 | ForsythWoman.com

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February 2019 | 75

Be You

BY TRACY FINK

Potato, Egg or Coffee Bean?

Once upon a time, a daughter complained to her father that her life was miserable and that she didn’t know how she was going to make it. She was tired of fighting and struggling all the time. It seemed just as one problem was solved, another one soon followed.

Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Once the three pots began to boil, he placed potatoes in one pot, eggs in the second pot, and ground coffee beans in the third pot.

He then let them sit and boil, without saying a word to his daughter. The daughter moaned and impatiently waited, wondering what he was doing. After twenty minutes he turned off the burners.

He took the potatoes out of the pot and placed them in a bowl.

He pulled the boiled eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

He then ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup. Turning to her he asked. “Daughter, what do you see?”

“Potatoes, eggs, and coffee,” she hastily replied.

“Look closer,” he said, “and touch the potatoes.” She did and noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break it.

After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. Its rich aroma brought a smile to her face.

“Father, what does this mean?” she asked.

He then explained that the potatoes, the eggs and coffee beans had each faced the same adversity– the boiling water. However, each one reacted differently.

The potato went in strong, hard, and unrelenting, but in boiling water, it became soft and weak.

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The egg was fragile, with the thin outer shell protecting its liquid interior until it was put in the boiling water. Then the inside of the egg became hard.

However, the ground coffee beans were unique. After they were exposed to the boiling water, they changed the water and created something new.

Sometimes terrible things happen. Marriages fail. Family members get sick. Friends are no longer there. Like you, I have had my share of tough times, but I have found that there are some simple things that have been useful to me to help me through them.

1. This, too, shall pass. Think back to what you have gone through so far and realize that you are strong and you will get through this as well.

2. You are not alone. Realize that other people are experiencing the same or similar thing.

There are people that you can talk to that can share their journey and help you through yours.

3. Check your thoughts. It is easy to become full of negative thoughts. Don’t allow them to consume you. Pick something good to focus on instead.

4. Move your body. When things are tough, we tend to introvert and are no longer motivated to go about our day. This is the time to make sure you get outside, get fresh air, move your body, dance in your room or do anything that gets you moving. It helps get rid of the extra cortisol that causes stress and anxiety.

5. Finally, take one day at a time. It can be overwhelming to think about the future. Just get through today.

There will always be tough times. What you need to ask yourself is when adversity knocks on your door, how will you respond? Are you a potato, an egg, or a coffee bean?

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Five Reasons to Admire

Coretta Scott King

Coretta Scott King was a woman who denied herself to perform God’s work and lead by example. Here are five admirable attributes embedded with history.

1. “FIRST LADY” OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT

We are all familiar with the term “first lady” whether it is regarding the wife of a pastor or the wife of the president. Although Martin Luther King, Jr. was not a national president, his wife, Coretta, was undeniably dubbed the First Lady of the Civil Rights Movement. It all started when Rosa Parks denied a seat to a white passenger in 1955. From there the Civil Rights Movement sparked with the Montgomery Bus Boycott that Martin and Coretta tirelessly led. From there, the movement exploded, and as a strong First Lady, Coretta fought alongside her husband to implement their ideas and to see a difference in, not only this country, but the world.

other family members and close friends, taught them how to be strong and courageous, fight for their causes, and how to carry on Martin’s legacy which she accomplished just by sharing Martin’s memories and accomplishments with them. With their children being so tender in age, there was only so much memory they had of their iconic father.

Fortunately, all four of their children went on to pursue careers in activism, law, and ministry.

4. ARCHITECT OF MLK’S LEGACY

Coretta and Martin had their first date during college. Martin told Coretta that very night that she had all the elements of his ideal wife: intelligence, beauty, character, and personality. Very stunned at Martin’s boldness, Coretta eventually lived up to Martin’s standards of a wife.

Because they shared many beliefs and ideas, it was easy for Coretta to support Martin’s dreams, because she had those same dreams as well. However, it was extremely difficult at times for Coretta to keep moving forward with the protesting, the congregating of organizations, the implementation of radical ideas, and the overseas traveling simply because of the racially-charged riots and personal threats they faced on a regular basis. The unconditional love that Coretta had for Martin kept that support alive.

There are numerous things that Coretta accomplished in honor of her husband after his death. Martin may have gotten assassinated, but his legacy did not! Coretta knew that Martin’s work was not done.

Immediately after Martin’s death, Coretta began mapping out The Martin Luther King Center for Nonviolent Social Change.

This historical center is also a resource center with recreational and literary classes, especially for low-income communities. It offered social education, taught people about Dr. King, how to become leaders, and perpetuate his legacy for nonviolent social change. It took Coretta a significant amount of time, but the King Center finally came to fruition in 1968. The Center still stands today, newly restored but based on the same ethics.

3. DYNAMIC MOTHER

5. BROKE THE MOLD

2. SUPPORTING WIFE

Coretta and Martin bore four children together: Yolanda, Marty, Dexter, and Bernice (“Bunny”) King. With strongly ethical and Christian parents such as Coretta and Martin, it’s undeniable that their offspring were destined for greatness. After the assassination of Martin, Coretta had to step up and become both the mother and father of her four kids.

She instilled values and wisdom in them, from finding creative ways to tell them all that, “Daddy is gone to Heaven, you won’t see him anymore but will always feel him” to raising them on Godly standards and shared ethics. Coretta suppressed her tears of grief but pushed through to be there for her kids; it was not about her anymore, but about the well-being of her children and a better world. She, along with

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Back in the 1950s and 1960s, social norms suggested that married women (especially moms) stay at home to keep the house and nurture her children. A lot of women were denied jobs outside the house at this time, and Martin encouraged Coretta to stay home with their kids while he went out protesting. But Coretta didn’t believe in staying in the “typical wife mode.” She believed that she was needed in the movement just as much as Martin was needed, and on some occasions, even their children accompanied them on marches!

Coretta was an uncompromising leader of quiet confidence, elegance and unique strength. A true role model.

Show yourself some love, and reclaim your “me” time.

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Love to Laugh?

Laughter as a Form of Medicine

Feeling stressed out lately? Maybe it’s time to crack a joke and tickle your funny bone!

triggered by just simply hearing someone else giggling and laughing.

Who knew how helpful a little laughter could be? The health benefits are surprisingly many. Whether you’re sharing an inside joke with a friend, watching a TV sitcom or comedy, listening to a comedian or cracking up at the Sunday funnies, you can boost your health and strengthen your relationships by simply laughing. Share the laughter in a giggle fest with someone you care about and it will help their health, too!

Strengthen your relationships and enforce bonding. Laughter unites people and helps you get through tough times. You can even add years to your life!

The more you can work on developing your humor and finding opportunities to explore and share it, the more you will . . . yes, laugh! Instead of waiting for someone to cheer you up or make you laugh, laugh whenever you can. Instead of getting defensive over your mistakes, flaws and imperfections, put a healthy positive spin on them and instead, laugh them off.

When something negative happens, flip it around and find what’s funny. Turn it into a humorous anecdote and let laughter light up your eyes, face and entire life.

GET THE GIGGLES

LAUGH LINES ARE LOVELY

WHY SO SERIOUS?

It’s fast, fun and free. . . Get playful and lighthearted. Turn what’s laughable into a game or exercise that becomes an ingrained habit. Reflect regularly on what’s funny.

Use humor to quickly alleviate tension in a situation, improve someone’s mood and outlook, or share something in common. It’s fun to be funny and share a sense of humor.

Use it in your daily conversations. Humor can greatly improve your connections and relationships, and it reinforces the social aspect of communicating with someone. It can aid your health, healing and life in so many ways!

Maybe laugh lines have formed next to twinkling eyes that sparkle and shine.

Perhaps they reflect a dash of wit, a bit of sass and a hint of sarcasm. Or just plain and simple old fashioned sense of humor and a love of laughter. Those lines that some people try to cover up and minimize are actually quite lovely. They show how much you have laughed and smiled over time and reflect how naturally you have aged, growing better over time, like a fine wine.

LAUGHTER IS FOR EVERYONE!

Relax and have fun. Naturally relieve tension and anxiety from issues and problems with ever-so-handy-humor. Calm down your whole body and let your muscles relax for up to 45 minutes after.

From babies to the elderly, each person can share a smile and laugh that will improve lives and lift their loads. Laughter can be contagious! Often, giggling and laughing is

80 | ForsythWoman.com

A TENSION TAMER AND ANXIETY RELIEVER

BY SUSAN SCHABACKER

HUMOR = HAPPINESS

Time to turn that frown upside down while you diffuse any anger and banish any sadness with this get-happy helper. Turn off those distressing emotions and opt for the positive. Improve your mood and add joy, zest and joie de vivre to life.

STAY HEALTHY

Become more resilient and amp up your ability to fight infection with antibodies and prevent diseases by improving your immune system.

SUBSTITUE PAIN MEDICATION AND LIVE LONGER

Escape pain with this feel-good solution when endorphins are released as feel-good chemicals. As if all these health benefits weren’t enough, a study in Norway has even found that people who laugh more tend to live longer.

WAYS TO GET GIGGLING:

• Make a list of all the people and things you find funny (try to be as detailed as possible) • Write down inside jokes and funny stories and reflect on them • Watch a funny TV show, movie or video on YouTube • Listen to or watch a comedian or funny speaker • Read a funny book, e-book or comic strip • Play with your pet or someone else’s pet • Play with a child or children and do something silly

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BY TARYN JEREZ OF ONECRAFTYMISS.COM

Why Starting a Business In Your Later Years Is Actually Amazing This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

Are you ready to hear an interesting fact?

According to the 2018 American Express, State of Women-Owned Businesses Report, “nearly half of women business owners are between the ages of 45 and 65 (48%) and two thirds (67%) are 45 or older.”

That’s no small percentage!

These numbers represent many different women’s stories. Some businesses come out of struggle and necessity, while others come from the desire for something new. Regardless, the success rate of those same entrepreneurial endeavors led by women 45 and older also rank highest, and that speaks volumes!

You better believe that starting a business in your later years is actually amazing and here are a few good reasons why.

YOU’RE MORE COMFORTABLE TAKING A RISK

You’ve got grit, kid. (Or at least something like that!) Nothing in life is a sure thing, and I promise you that starting a small business is no different.

There is always a certain amount of risk involved, especially when you get into capital and funding conversations! After you’ve experienced those formidable years of trying to avoid risks during college or when you were starting a family or building a career, there is a stage where the risk doesn’t scare you as much anymore. Instead, you welcome it, because you know that a risk means you are positioning yourself towards something worth changing. You have a little more freedom to take these kinds of steps in your later years.

YOUR NETWORK IS VAST (& WHO YOU KNOW, CAN’T HURT!)

There is a lot to be said for having a wellconnected network of people in your life. The older we get, the people in your life and the caliber of those relationships tend to grow in quality, rather than quantity alone. When you are starting a business, a support system is one of the biggest assets you can have. Having people in your circle who not only care about you and your success but are willing to help promote what you’re doing and connect you to others is very important. Cultivating a community of resources that can assist you on different expertise levels and categories is much more likely when you’ve known people longer and more in depth.

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YOU’VE LEARNED WHAT WORKS & WHAT DOESN’T

The more years in your life, the more mistakes and failures can be accounted for. What that really means is the more lessons have been learned! Starting a business has so many different steps and processes that having previous experiences to bring to the table is all the better. Despite if your previous career path directly correlates to your new business venture, the overall experiences you’ve had will translate in many different ways and help you be a stronger entrepreneur. Maybe this isn’t your first rodeo, and you’ve had other small businesses that closed in the past? Knowing what doesn’t work is often even more valuable than knowing what did.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU REALLY WANT OUT OF LIFE

F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “It’s never too late to be whoever you want to be.” For the women who’ve gone to sleep each night with the same business idea for years - it’s not too late. And for the women who woke up after a nap on a random Tuesday afternoon wanting to start a business? It’s not too late for her either. There is something beautiful that happens as we get older - we stop caring so much about what others think and lean into our own vision for our life a bit more. Embracing that evolution of self-awareness and knowing what you really want out of your life, makes starting a business a perfect option.

Find the support you need to take what you already know and start building momentum towards your goal. And learn the rest along the way! There are so many positive things working in your favor, it would be a shame to let the opportunity go.

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February 2019 | 83

Raspberry Linzer

Anyone who knows me knows I use any holiday to make festive treats. From the new year on into Valentine’s Day, these cookies are the perfect treat to pass along to family and friends to show them how much you care. This specialty cookie takes a little extra effort but is well worth the patience and time! Traditionally a European delight, I used an adapted recipe that does not require ground nuts, making them simple and delicious! And can we talk about the raspberry jam filling? They’re adorable, delectable and festive for your Valentine’s Day this year. Enjoy!

INGREDIENTS 2 sticks butter, softened to room temperature 2 ⁄3 cup + 3 tablespoons powdered sugar 1 egg yolk, beaten 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 2 ½ cups all-purpose flour ¼ teaspoon salt 2 ⁄3 cup raspberry jam

DIRECTIONS Preheat oven to 325°F. Beat butter and 2⁄3 cup powdered sugar in a mixing bowl. Carefully add in egg yolk and vanilla extract. Once fully combined, add in flour and salt. Carefully wrap half of the dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate.

On a floured surface, roll out half of the dough to ½ inch thickness. Using two different sized heart cookie cutters, cut equal portions of base and windowed cookie parts. Place onto cookie sheet and bake for 10 to 12 minutes. While the first batch is baking, repeat the heart cutting process with the other half of dough.

Once all dough has been baked let completely cool.

When ready, spread raspberry jam onto base cookies and top with windowed cookies. Dust with powdered sugar and serve!

84 | ForsythWoman.com

Heart Cookies

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Propane refilling station | A/C & Auto Repair State Inspections | U-Haul Rentals | 24 hour Towing February 2019 | 85

JESSICA L. KIMBLE

Jessica L. Kimble was recently recognized by NAIOP, the Commercial Real Development Association, as a 2018 Developing Leader Award winner.

This award is given to rising industry professionals across NAIOP’s chapter network in all sectors of commercial real estate. The annual award honors up-and-coming professionals under the age of 35 for their extraordinary professional accomplishments, strong leadership and community involvement. She attended Wittenburg University and graduated from the Wake Forest University School of Law. “I have has been active in Big Brothers Big Sisters of Forsyth County and currently serve on the Board of Directors for Habitat for Humanity of Forsyth County,” said Kimble. She enjoys DIY home projects, puzzles and games, running, cycling and her two dogs, Laney and Lola. Kimble was also named to Business North Carolina magazine’s Legal Elite Young Guns list in 2017.

BRITNEY LOWERY

Britney Lowery has many accomplishments under her belt as the founder and CCO of Doers Firm. As a North Carolina native and explorer of many cultures, subjects and areas, her well-pursued purpose is to help others clarify their vision and bring it into their reach. As she has studied the subjects of economics, real estate, art and commerce, she has learned that to excel and be relevant takes creativity, perception and knowing your superpower. As Doers Firm is her superpower, she was raised in the midst of business leaders, creative artists and Christian-ministry icons that instilled that faith is the starting point of excelling in anything. Her ultimate goal is to empower individuals to use their talent and passion to better the economic and civil value of their respective homeplaces. Having done so through fostering cross-county conversations, cross-generational engagement and merging ideas through the nonprofit, forprofit and government sectors, she plans to use personal and business branding as a vehicle to drive people to maximize their potential. She believes that Winston-Salem and the Triad area is a place that has the capacity to usher in timeless industries such as personal and business branding through soft skills like etiquette and vision planning that is economically sound.

JACKIE JACKSON

Jackie Jackson recently joined the team at Ireland Insurance Agency and hopes to bring her skills and expertise to the business. She earned a degree in mathematics and sociology from Adrian College as well as her MBA from Wake Forest University.

Jackie is a passionate, motivated, servant leader with 20 years of progressive leadership experience in operations management. Her motivation and Ireland Insurance Agency’s 80 years of experience serving the Piedmont Triad Region are a winning combination! Jackson’s primary focus is on being a wife and the mother to four very active and dynamic sons! She is also a breast cancer survivor!

86 | ForsythWoman.com

DONNA LANGLEY

Skilled at accentuating the natural assets of each person she treats, Donna Langley, RN, certified nurse injector and laser specialist, is an integral part of Salem Plastic Surgery, Inc. where patients are offered a full array of cosmetic and elective procedures and treatments. Donna’s creative nature is a definite asset as she assesses and provides treatments utilizing her skill at injecting Botox and fillers such as Voluma, Juvederm and Vollure. Having gone through the extensive training to become certified in both injectables and laser techniques, she can also offer appropriate therapies for body contouring, facial rejuvenation and hair removal. During her off hours, Donna can be found at home enjoying her family with the recent addition of grandchildren and also transforming her flea market and yard sale finds into unique creations. Donna received her R.N. status from Forsyth Technical Community College. She has proven her abilities by being promoted to Nursing Supervisor at Salem Plastic Surgery in addition to her current position and is also a valued asset to the surgical team. With all of her natural talent and the training she has received, Donna has proven herself to be a valued team member of Salem Plastic Surgery.

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SHERRI HARVEY

Sherri Harvey is excited about her opportunities to design an individual regimen for skin care, which might include chemical peels, microneedling and laser treatments, for patients at Salem Plastic Surgery, Inc. as an esthetician. Having undergone the extensive training necessary to be certified as an esthetician and in laser therapies, Sherri is skilled at providing recommendations for skin care and enhancement and body contouring with Icon Laser and CoolSculpting. Alongside the surgeons at Salem Plastic Surgery, Inc., she is able to bring her impressive knowledge and skills to provide alternatives to surgical procedures and to enhance the results the patients may have already achieved through surgery. She received her training at Davidson County Community College along with the necessary hours of continuing education courses to be knowledgeable in current developments. When not in the office, she is a happily busy grandmother and community member who takes joy in the care and company of family and friends. With her upbeat personality and willingness to discover the latest and best treatments, she has proven herself to be a valued team member of Salem Plastic Surgery.

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Philippians 4:13 February 2019 | 87

BY DAVE MCCONNELL

HEART HEALTH IN AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMEN February is American Heart Month. Each year in the U.S., 1 in 4 deaths are caused by heart disease, making it the leading cause of death for American men and women. About 610,000 Americans have a first stroke every year. Another 525,000 have a first heart attack. Additionally, heart disease and stroke are the No. 1 killer in women, and stroke disproportionately affects African-Americans.

Importantly, AfricanAmerican women are less likely than Caucasian women to be aware that heart disease is the leading cause of death.

So, while many adult women may feel like they are aware of the dangers of heart disease, they may not fully understand the risk factors and preventative measures, especially if they are of African American descent.

Risk factors for stroke and heart disease include high blood pressure, high cholesterol, smoking, and being overweight or obese. African-American women have the highest rates of being overweight or obese compared to other groups in the U.S. (about 82% of AfricanAmerican women are overweight or obese).

This is important to realize for the following reasons:

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• People who are overweight are more likely to suffer from high blood pressure, high levels of blood fats, diabetes, and LDL cholesterol -- all risk factors for heart disease and stroke.

• In 2015, African-Americans were 20% less likely to engage in active physical activity as non-Hispanic whites.

• Deaths rates from heart disease and stroke are higher for AfricanAmericans as compared to whites.

Additional risk factors for heart disease and stroke include diabetes, physical inactivity, and a family history of heart disease, all of which are prevalent among African-Americans. This results in twice the risk of stroke for African-American women when compared to Caucasian females, and death rates at earlier ages.

Here are a few more unsettling stats from the American Heart Association: • Cardiovascular diseases kill nearly 50,000 African-American women annually.

• Of African-American women ages 20 and older, 49 percent have heart diseases.

• Only 1 in 5 African-American women believes she is personally at risk.

• Only 52 percent of African-American women are aware of the signs and symptoms of a heart attack.

• Only 36 percent of African-American women know that heart disease is their greatest health risk.

• More than 40 percent of non-Hispanic blacks have high blood pressure, which is more severe in blacks than whites and develops earlier in life.

Despite genetic differences that make some African-Americans more sensitive to salt and the resultant high blood pressure, the good news is that the risks can be lowered through lifestyle changes and, in some cases, medications. More fruits, vegetables, and exercise are all helpful in decreasing risk. Exact types and amounts of exercise are still being studied. New risk equations exist that can predict more accurately the true risk for heart disease and stroke in African-Americans. These prediction models were based primarily on past research done with Caucasians, but newer models include AfricanAmericans and are more precise. To calculate 10-year risk, the updated equation uses race, gender, age, total cholesterol, HDL (good) cholesterol, blood pressure, use of blood pressure medication, diabetes status and smoking status. Ask your health care provider about your risk based on this new prediction model.

And, as a reminder, the signs of stroke include: • Sudden numbness or weakness of the face, arm or leg, especially on one side of the body • Sudden confusion, trouble speaking or understanding • Sudden trouble seeing in one or both eyes • Sudden trouble walking, dizziness, loss of balance or coordination • Sudden, severe headache with no known cause For Heart Health month, get informed, get medical advice and lower your risk for heart disease and stroke. It is a “heartwarming” thing to do!

Resources: goredforwomen.org | minorityhealth.hhs.gov

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I’m a

Have you ever wondered if there were different styles of flirting?

Absolutely! A sociological study from 2010—still relevant now— confirmed five different styles of flirting: the sincere flirt, the physical flirt, the playful flirt, the polite flirt, and the traditional flirt. It is likely that our flirting style matches our personalities as well, and can attract future spouses – that is, if they speak your flirting language or if they are at least intrigued by it. Here are the five unique flirting styles, confirmed by Match.com!

THE SINCERE FLIRT

The sincere flirt doesn’t play around. They prefer to be straightforward and have normal conversation. They may ask you deep, yet harmless questions to get to the core of who you really are. Although some people may find this style boring, intense, or may not even perceive it as flirting, it has been discovered that this is the most common flirting method. The sincere flirt is likely an intellectual who loves to engage in thought-provoking, meaningful, even philosophical conversations. They want to dive deep into the abyss and get to know the core of their date, which can sometimes be overbearing at the first few encounters.

Revealing too much about oneself on, say, the first date can be a turnoff. So it is important for the sincere flirt to take things slowly and lightly and wait to get to know each other more before getting too deep.

THE PHYSICAL FLIRT

Just like how that little 8-year-old girl constantly pokes that one boy she likes in class, the physical flirt likes to connect with their target by touching. They may touch your arm or your knee as they’re laughing at a joke you just made. They may compliment your outfit while gently tugging at your sleeve.

This physical type of flirting is highly suggestive and may send an undesirable message to someone who is not interested, especially if they communicate like the sincere flirt. It is vital to try to get to know each other better before taking things to the next level.

THE PLAYFUL FLIRT

This flirt is completely opposite from the sincere flirt.

The playful type flirts to gain a reward, not for love. They are known to be a bit manipulative with their flirting. For instance, if they want a free dessert, they may playfully flirt with the waiter until he gives in. Or they may flirt for free entry to get into the lounge. The playful flirt is never really interested in anyone but uses their flirting style to get their way.

So, keep your eyes open around a playful flirt!

THE POLITE FLIRT

The polite flirt takes things very slowly and cautiously. They can move so slow that one may not even know if they are interested!

They show their interest in a matter of days, weeks, or even months. They are introverted and shy people who plan out their next moves. They are not interested in flirting and awkward dating. They may show their interest in saying “Hello” with a smile, coy eye contact that seems constant, and maybe just smiling your way and quickly looking away when your eyes meet theirs. They are normally found in quiet, low key areas such as bookstores, art galleries, and coffee shops. But rest assured, they are certainly interested and are waiting on you to make that first move!

90 | ForsythWoman.com

THE TRADITIONAL FLIRT

!

BY BRITTANY M. ORIE

This is what I like to call the “old skool” flirt! A traditionalist female would wait for the man to make the first move if he is interested. And a traditionalist male would not find it acceptable at all if the woman makes the first move, so he goes after his future wife while she waits to be swept away by his chivalry! The traditional flirt adheres by standard gender roles: the guy asks the girl out for a date by phone rather than text message, he pays for dinner, and drives her—or walks her—back home and leans in for the kiss. The woman’s reciprocation for the man’s charm is reinforcement that he’s doing well. She returns the favor simply by answering the phone when he calls or just by buying something nice.

So which flirt are you?

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February 2019 | 91

Failure is Inevitable: Embrace It

You know that song that goes, “I get knocked down, but I get up again. You’re never gonna keep me down”?

BY TARYN JEREZ

What we have to try to remember, is that no one is out there creating a detailed list of their failures to add to their resume.

You won’t scroll through social media anytime soon to see monumental screw-ups and failures of your friends being showcased among the highlight reels of their lives.

Sometimes I feel like that’s the anthem we all need more of in our lives.

Let’s be honest. Failing is hard. Whether in our personal or professional life, no matter how many times we encounter the experience, it doesn’t seem to feel any less like getting knocked down.

I’ve learned over my nearly thirty years on this planet that we tend to look at failures through the lens of what others think. Therefore, when we’re deeming something a “failure,” we’re adding feelings of shame and embarrassment which, in turn, sends the scale of our self-worth on a swan dive. Hence, the knocked down feeling.

At the end of the day, failure is inevitable. Imagine what would happen if we stopped hiding behind our failures and, instead, learned to embrace them?

WHEN YOU FAIL, SHOW YOURSELF GRACE.

If you have ever taken part in a game of Chutes & Ladders or Candyland with a child or two, you may recall dealing with the unavoidable winning and losing at the end. What starts out as a simple game of fun can end in a lesson about taking a loss. I can still recall crying at the end of a game when I was little and my dad talking to me about not being a sore loser and winning gracefully. As adults, I think this lesson is still a difficult one to grasp. While we teach our children how to fail gracefully, we have to, in turn, show ourselves grace when we fail in life. Not every failure should be a blow to our self-worth! If you fail, that means you tried in the first place. Show yourself grace in those difficult moments and remind yourself that sometimes the win is in the experience.

EVERY FAILURE IS A LESSON. LEARN FROM THEM.

My husband often recites this quote to me when I question my own failures: “There is no losing, there is just winning and learning.” Every time we fail at something, there really is a lesson. In my experience as a small business owner, I’ve learned more lessons of what not to do than anything else! When we identify our failures, no matter the level they may seem, we walk away with lessons. The hard part is actually learning from those lessons and moving forward better off and more prepared.

Next time you encounter something that feels like failing, take inventory! Really dive into the situation and see what worked and what didn’t, and how you can learn from it and move on.

IF YOU’RE GOING TO FAIL, FAIL SPECTACULARLY.

There are few things the world loves more than a great comeback story! Think about it. How many professional athletes, CEOs, celebrities, and other public figures can you think of who, after what seemed like their darkest hour, came back with a Bang? Never let the fear of failure cripple you from the life you want to pursue! Wouldn’t you rather know that you went for what you wanted most and failed, than always question what could have been? You can find hundreds of quotes about regret, but the one that always stuck with me is from Lewis Carrol: “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.” Embrace the failures in your life and what you can learn from them and absorb that growth. We put our heart and soul into so much of what we do as women, that the reality that we will fail should never be greater than the reality that we will also succeed!

92 | ForsythWoman.com

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February 2019 | 93

Not Your Usual Sunday Night Football: Fun Super Bowl Facts

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

Millions of Americans gather around their televisions, usually on the first Sunday in February, to watch the annual National Football League, NFL, championship game, more commonly known as the Super Bowl. About 103.4 million people watched last year’s game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the New England Patriots. This year, the same number, if not more, is expected to take part in this long-standing tradition. From parties and favorite game time snacks, to memorable commercials and halftime performances, the Super Bowl has been a part of America’s history since 1967. Throughout the years, the game has developed a unique history and fun facts, including the ones below.

• The first Super Bowl was held on January 15, 1967, between the Green Bay Packers and Kansas City. The Packers defeated Kansas City with a score of 35-10.

In addition, it was created as a game, combining the National Football League (NFL) and the American Football League (AFL).

• Since Super Bowl V (5), the NFL has been labeling each game with a Roman numeral. This tradition was to prevent confusion for when the game is played. For example, the Super Bowl is played in the next year for the regular football season of the past year. The 2019 championship is going to be Super Bowl LIII. • The winning team receives the Vince Lombardi Trophy and Super Bowl rings. The trophy weighs seven pounds, is 21 inches high, and is worth $25,000. Also, it is named after winning coach of the Green Bay Packers, Vince Lombardi, leader of the first Super Bowl winners. A new trophy is made each year by Tiffany & Co. out of sterling silver.

• According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, this day is the second-largest day for eating in the United States, next to Thanksgiving.

• The average cost for 30 seconds of air time for a commercial is $2.8 million. When the first Super Bowl was played, commercials for one minute cost between $75,000 and $85,000.

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• The most unforgettable Super Bowl commercials of all-time are Apple’s “1984,” Always “Like a Girl,” Wendy’s “Where’s the Beef,” and Budweiser’s “Puppy Love.”

• Football player Peyton Manning has made history as being the only starting quarterback to win the Super Bowl with two different teams. In 2007, he won with the Indianapolis Colts, and in 2016, he won with the Denver Broncos. The New England Patriots’ Tom Brady has won five Super Bowls, making him the most awarded starting quarterback in the game’s history. Terry Bradshaw and Joe Montana follow behind with four each.

• The Pittsburgh Steelers have won the most Super Bowls championships, with six trophies. Coming in with five wins are the San Francisco 49ers, Dallas Cowboys, and the New England Patriots.

As for the most losses, that would be the Denver Broncos with five.

• Another first for the Pittsburgh Steelers, is that they were the first team to visit the White House in 1980. Along with the Pittsburgh Pirates, the 1979 World Series winners, they met with President Jimmy Carter.

• Pop singer Michael Jackson’s 1993 halftime performance had higher ratings than the Super Bowl game itself.

• Other “Super Bowls” are held throughout the country and on television. One is the annual Otter Bowl at the Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach, California. The animals play with a football while an employee is the commentator.

Excitement for Super Bowl Sunday begins long before the two teams are decided. Now, you are able to surprise your friends and family with your newly acquired Super Bowl trivia, while watching the big game.

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THE BEST / THE WORST

BY VONDA HENDERSON

What’s your opinion on the best enhancements or the worst things that came about during the past few years? Of course, the list will be different from person to person. What one person sees as the icing on the cake may be a total disaster to someone else – it’s all in how you look at things. A few with pros and cons come to mind.

BOOKS

Are you a reader? Is your local bookstore or library someplace that draws you in to stroll through aisles to check out the latest bestsellers?

The variety of ways to read that one can select from these days is remarkable. For the purists, nothing is going to replace a book, hardback or softcover; as long as there are pages to smell and turn, you’re a happy reader. For others who read on the go, the e-version of the same book elicits a similar reaction. For still others, there’s the audio version. Any means that results in reading is a good thing – paper books, e-versions, and audio – just read and continue to encourage kids to read.

SOCIAL MEDIA

The social media world may be unchartered territory to some, but the concept does have its pros. With social media vehicles like Facebook, you can keep up with family and find old friends you haven’t spoken to in years. Reconnecting with people you grew up with but lost touch with is so special – sharing milestone events and who has the most kids or grandkids. Virtual high school reunions on a much smaller scale are possible. For families who live miles apart, social media keeps you connected far better than an occasional phone call or card. Helping older family members embrace some of the easier to navigate tools helps them stay connected, which can help improve their sense of wellbeing.

MUSIC

Listening to music anywhere and everywhere.

Remember those boom boxes? We went from 45s, to long-playing albums, to the 8-track era, cassette tapes, CDs, and all sorts of download options. And amazingly, records –or vinyls, as they’re now known – are making a comeback.

On the con side, there remains a concern about kids wearing earplugs with their tunes cranked up way too loud and the long-term impact on an entire generation’s hearing.

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VIDEO

Are you like many folks who have boxes filled with VHS tapes that you’re just holding onto in case they make a comeback? Sadly, looks like that ship has sailed. On the positive side, however, with Blue Ray and CDs you do usually get some added features along with the movie – either bloopers, backstory, or editor’s cut – if you like that sort of detail.

PHONES

The technology behind cell phones has changed how we use phones and the industry seems to add new enhancements as soon as everyone gets comfortable with whatever the latest version happens to be.

We’ve transitioned from the very early bag phones to any number of flip versions with pullout antennas, to small handheld devices, and now they’re getting larger again. Landlines are disappearing from homes as people opt to stay in a constant state of availability with their cell phones always at hand. How in touch do we really need to be? How about a moratorium on electronic devices once a week? Or, at least at mealtime?

Think about what you enjoy now that you never dreamed would have existed 20, 30, or 40+ years ago. What’s your list of the best and worst things that people use these days? Isn’t it amazing what comes around and what visionaries think will be in the future? Those creators of the Jetsons got a few things spot on, didn’t they?

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ADULTING 101

BY DENISE HEIDEL Do you ever think it’s ironic how kids try so hard to be grown up, and grown-ups long for the days of being a kid? It’s true that we often want what we don’t have. And adulting is no different.

budget. Going to the grocery store. Eating your vegetables without being told. It also comes with a few perks like being able to eat cake for breakfast.

The act of adulting, or being an adult, is thrust upon 18-years-olds around the country.

Suddenly, they go from being a teenager to an adult. Poof! Just like that. Real responsibility.

Real accountability. And at 18, suddenly being a “grown-up” takes on new meaning.

But the simple truth is, for many of us who have hit the 18-year threshold, we don’t really “feel” like adults. Forsyth County adult Katie Marsh, shared, “I’m 44, but I still call my mother with questions. While I’ve mastered most grown-up tasks, I don’t feel like a middle-aged woman.

It doesn’t feel like 18 was that long ago, but yet – I’ve got a grown son who now calls me with adulting questions.”

Adulting includes paying your own bills.

Doing your own laundry. Creating your own

With all that said, the following suggestions will make adulting a little easier, whether you’re a new adult or a seasoned veteran.

• Be committed to being self-reliant. We spend the first 17 years of life dependent on Mom and Dad to provide for us. While many parents help their children transition from childhood to adulthood, at some point we all have to rely on ourselves rather than our parents.

• Get some rest. Adulting is hard. And sometimes, it’s overwhelming. Especially as responsibilities increase and demands on our time keep us busy.

• Learn how to say no. We all have 24 hours in a day, and it’s impossible to do it all. Learn how to say no and prioritize the things that matter most.

• Don’t stop learning. Our education doesn’t end with high school or college.

Being an adult doesn’t mean having all the answers, but it does include ongoing personal development and growth.

• Learn when to be quiet, and when to speak. Sometimes, your opinions are best kept to yourself.

• Piggybacking on that thought, adulting means understanding that you don’t have to participate in every argument you’re invited to.

• Spend less than you earn. Live within your means and don’t try to keep up with the Joneses.

• Social media is a fun place to spend time, but keep it to a minimum and don’t think that the things you post can’t come back to haunt you. People have lost jobs over stupid things posted on social media.

It’s always a good idea to think before you post.

• Set some personal goals. It’s always good and rewarding to work toward something.

• Eat right and take care of yourself.

Self explanatory.

Adulting is a part of life. One we spend a lifetime learning.

Some adulting quotes…

“So it turns out, being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.”

“I keep thinking, ‘Oh, man, I’m so immature. How am I allowed to be an adult?’ Then, I spend time with teenagers, and it’s like, ‘Wow. Okay, yeah. I am an adult. I am so an adult.

Look at me. Adulting all over the place.”

“’You’re still a rock star,’ I whisper to myself as I take my multivitamin and get in bed by 9:00.”

“My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.”

“Adulthood is like the vet, and we’re all the dogs that were excited for the car ride until we realize where we’re going.”

“You know you’re an adult when you get excited to just go home.”

“Being an adult is mostly being exhausted. Wishing you hadn’t made plans.

And wondering how you hurt your back.”

~Unknown

~Unknown

~Unknown

~Unknown

~Unknown

~Unknown

~Unknown

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Clemmons Bicycle Shop

Chermak & Hanson

Give the gift of quality time this Valentine’s Day. 1 YEAR FREE SERVICES WITH BICYCLE PURCHASE.

Serving Forsyth County Families for Over 40 Years TRI • Road • Mountain • Comfort • Hybrids • BMX • Kids Bicycles Tricycles • Scooters • Bob Strollers • Unicycles

336.766.5564 • www.clemmonsbicycle.com 2703 Lewisville-Clemmons Rd, Clemmons, NC

House Matters Lawncare

Experience • Quality • Customer Service Dr. David S. Chermak • Dr. John C. Hanson Orthodontics for Children & Adults

Never Underestimate the Power of a Smile!

WINSTON-SALEM 336-760-1491 • CLEMMONS 336-766-8244 • KING 336-983-4551

Urbn grl

Bringing the love of all things vintage this Valentine’s Day. mention this ad for 15% off Check out our new website! www.urbngrl.com

336-955-2303 | Katie@urbngrl.com | 908 Burke St, Winston-Salem, NC 27101 @urbngrlwsnc February 2019 | 99

Sweets To Make Your Sweetie Smile

BY JULIE FRITZ

MAKE A DATE OUT OF IT

If you want to make an evening out of it, making chocolate fondue is a lot of fun and a great idea for your Valentine’s Date Night. Use this recipe to make the fondue and put together some stuff for dipping.

You can use strawberries, bananas, pound cake, Rice Krispies treats, marshmallows or anything else that sounds good to dip in chocolate

CHOCOLATE FONDUE

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. What better way to show your love than to make some homemade sweets. If you are in a new relationship or in a seasoned one, this can be a great way to show how much you care.

FOR THE CHOCOLATE LOVER

There are lots of great ways to make chocolate treats. Once you get the melting part down, you can dip or mold it into lots of fun stuff. You can use chocolate melts to make basic melted chocolate. They come in a variety of colors and are easy to find at any local craft store. There are simple directions for you to follow on the package. Then it’s time to get creative. You can buy chocolate molds to make candies in. There are even ways to fill those candies with all sorts of yummy fillings. You could also use it to make chocolate covered cherries, strawberries, pretzels or cookies.

10 ounces semisweet or bittersweet chocolate 1/3 cup milk 1/3 cup heavy cream 1 teaspoon vanilla extract • Combine the chocolate, milk and cream and heat on low, stirring often, until mixture is smooth.

• Once melted, stir in the vanilla extract. You can add additional milk or cream one teaspoon at a time to make the mixture thinner.

• Pour the mixture into a fondue pot or small slow cooker to keep warm while serving.

COOKIES

Everyone loves cookies, and there are lots of different kinds you can make. Using a basic sugar cookie recipe, like the one provided here, will give you a chance to make it your own. You can use food coloring to make the dough red or pink. Get heart-shaped cookie cutters to make them festive. Decorating them with frosting and candies is another great option. And if sugar cookies aren’t your thing, you can always make some chocolate chip cookies and add red and pink candies to the batter.

SUGAR COOKIES

1 Cup unsalted butter 1 Cup granulated white sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon almond extract 1 egg 2 teaspoons baking

• Preheat oven to 350° F. • Cream butter and sugar until smooth.

• Beat in extracts and egg.

• In a separate bowl combine dry ingredients and add a little at a time to the wet ingredients. The dough will be very stiff. If it becomes too stiff for your mixer, turn out the dough onto a

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powder 1/2 teaspoon salt 3 cups all-purpose flour

countertop surface. Wet your hands and finish off kneading the dough by hand.

• Divide into workable batches, roll out to ¼ inch thickness onto a floured surface and cut.

• Bake for 6-8 minutes.

• Let cool on the cookie sheet until firm enough to transfer to a cooling rack.

SOMETHING DIFFERENT

Maybe your Valentine doesn’t really care for sweet treats. This would be a great time to think outside the box about something different. A homemade gift or card might be the right choice for them. If you don’t fancy yourself as a crafty person, that is ok. You could still put together a homemade coupon book that they could use to cash in for a movie night or a back rub. It doesn’t have to be fancy; it really is the thought that counts.

Whatever you decide to make, keep in mind what your loved one will enjoy. It will mean so much to them that you took the time to think about what they might enjoy and made it especially for them.

Photo Arttistry by Melinda

PHOTO ARTISTRY BY MELINDA

PHOTOARTISTRYBYMELINDA@YAHOO.COM

336-407-3655

S C R E E N P R I N T I N G • E M B R O I D E RY • S C H O O L / T E A M A P PA R E L • C A R W R A P S • D E C A L S

Winston-Salem based print company, specializing in advertising & custom apparel

Tru Culler

Advertising & Apparel

TrueCuller.co • 336.407.0983 162 Hillsdale W Drive Advance, NC 27006

February 2019 | 101

RACHELLE FREND PHOTOGRAPHY

Congratulations to newlyweds, Jack and Jessica Matlock McGarty, who were married at Clemmons Moravian Church on October 27, 2018! Friends and family gathered to celebrate at the Historic Broyhill!

Happy Birthday to Centenarian, Hyacinth Helms Jenkins, who turns 100 on February 21, 2019. A large gathering of family and friends will help her celebrate this incredible milestone. Her words of wisdom (that span a century) can be found on page 48.

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Happy 84th Birthday Dad / Papaw!

Love, Keela, Tim, Brooke & Tanner

February 2019 | 103

Salem Detailing, Evan Wiles

Singing Bird Salon

Rodan + Fields, Kelley Carnall

AMERICAN CUSTOM LEATHER

American Custom Leather Keith Bryson,

Hand Crafted Custom Leather Belts, Guitar Straps, & More!

AMERICANCUSTOMLEATHER.COM

Bark of the Town

Owner

336.201.7687

Sales@AmericanCustomLeather.com

6300 Ramada Drive, C-2, Clemmons

Tel: 336.354.7955

kennel free

clean & stress free salon Owner/stylist Nicole Tiller

CHEST

CADDY Chest Caddy Kortney Beam Designs

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Hot & Cold Therapy

ONE UNIQUE VEST. FIVE WAYS TO APPLY ICE OR HEAT.

www.chestcaddy.com

Carolina Characters

My Grace-Full Life Finding God’s Grace Every Day.

MyGraceFullLife.com Read My Grace-Full Life each month in Forsyth Family!

Dawson Tree Service

emerson designs

Emerson Designs graphic design services

252.558.2331 | aron.emersondesigns@gmail.com

345-2572 • 766-1169 • DawsonTreeService.com

Carolyn’s Baby Cakes

Carolyn’s Baby Cakes

336.682.1311 • CarolynsBabyCakes.net

proud supporter of Forsyth Magazines

CUTS • COLORS • MAKEUP

Farragowith Abby today and

Book your appointment receive a $10 gift card for Farrago’s gift shop

6301 Shallowford Road, Lewisville, NC 27023 336.946.9128 | FarragoNC.com

LuLaRoe by Amy Daniels LuLaRoe, Amy Daniels Look beautiful.

Feel amazing.

@LLRAmyDaniels

252.558.2396

Chrystal Yates

lularoeamydaniels620@gmail.com

ChrystalYates.com February 2019 | 105

EATING DIS

RDER

AWARENESS

BY JAMIE LOBER

The National Eating Disorder Association declared Monday, February 25 through Sunday, March 3, 2019, as eating disorder awareness week. There are many women who made the resolution to lose weight or exercise more and took it too far. The National Institute of Mental Health reinforced that eating disorders are serious and not a lifestyle choice. While both genders are affected, more women struggle than men.

Research shows that the cause is complex but may relate to psychological, social, biological, behavioral and genetic factors. Brain imaging studies reveal the brain activity is different in a woman with an eating disorder compared to a healthy woman.

No two eating disorders are the same. When you understand the symptoms, it becomes easier to determine if you or someone you love is struggling.

• Anorexia nervosa: avoiding, restricting or eating small amounts of certain foods. These women see themselves as overweight even when it is not the reality and tend to weigh themselves frequently. Beware of distorted body image, extremely thin appearance, and intensive exercise and restricted eating.

• Bulimia nervosa: eating large amounts of food out of the ordinary, followed by use of laxatives or diuretics, excessive exercise, vomiting or a combination. With bulimia, a person can be average weight or overweight.

Sometimes dehydration or electrolyte imbalance will occur, along with other serious consequences as a result of the behaviors.

• Binge-eating disorder: having no control over eating. This leads women to be overweight or obese.

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The earlier you seek treatment, the better your outcome will be. You do not want to delay, as it can put you at risk for medical complications, and even suicide. Women with eating disorders often have co-occurring disorders like depression, substance abuse or anxiety that need to be addressed.

The good news is that there are many treatments available.

• Individual, group or family psychotherapy • Cognitive therapy where you learn to identify unhealthy thinking patterns and replace them with better beliefs • Mood stabilizer, antidepressant or antipsychotic medications • Clinical trials where you may try new drugs or combinations of drugs to see if they are safe and yield good results Regardless of the treatment you choose, you can expect to set realistic goals. This means achieving a healthy weight, getting back to a balanced diet, reducing excessive exercise and cutting out any binging or purging that was related to the disorder. Your physician can help point you in the direction of some great resources as well. Remember that having a positive and healthy body image is a critical part of mental wellness and eating disorder prevention. Consider things that you like about yourself and be appreciative of what your body is able to do, such as dance, run or swim. Be accepting of yourself as a whole person and put yourself in an environment with people who will do the same. As a woman, you are likely charged with setting an example for your household, so you want to be extra cognizant of your behaviors.

You cannot always tell who is in recovery based on physical appearance alone. There are some resolutions you can make if you have been struggling with body image or have an eating disorder of your own.

• Make a list of what you are thankful for in your life. This can be anything from a great group of friends to cool winter weather to a dog or cat who loves you unconditionally.

You will travel further focusing on gratitude instead of negativity.

• Write down the little victories along your journey. Whether you are striving to change negative thought patterns, create a healthy nutrition plan or follow through with therapy appointments, these are all worth celebrating.

• Focus on self-care instead of self-destruction.

Positive affirmations or quotes by inspiring people can help add some good energy to your day. If you are compulsively exercising or eating something at a certain time, replace the habit with a healthier one such as doing an activity you enjoy, like singing, reading or journaling.

• Remove anything toxic from your environment. Set boundaries for yourself so you are only surrounded by people who want the best for you and are supportive. Pay attention to the media that you consume as well. It is easy to find unhealthy images and consider them normal.

• Remember that nobody is perfect. If you make a mistake or slip up into a bad habit, let it go and continue to move forward. Know that you are capable and, in time, can reach a full recovery. Every woman and her family is deserving of a healthier 2019.

iHeart Radio

February 2019 | 107

Poetically Correct

BY BRITTANY M. ORIE

Poetry can be cryptic and complex, but also artistic and beautiful. It has evolved tremendously over the centuries yet remained consistent. Let’s take a closer look at that paradoxical statement and see how poetry has blessed the world and how some people are using it today.

POETICALLY HISTORICAL

Poetry originated as a spoken language before it was ever written on tablets. It was a world tradition and a form of storytelling and entertainment, and had to be memorized by the speaker. Because verse had a tendency of being perpetually long, the speaker would often use alliteration and rhyming as mnemonic devices to help them connect with the words and as a memory aid. This is how poetry kept its consistency over the centuries; rhyming, alliterations, and metaphors were very catchy and unique and unlike conventional language.

It’s hard to track down who the very first poet was, but the earliest written poem was titled Gilgamesh which was written back in 2000 B.C. by Sumerians (present-day Iraq).

The earliest type of poetry is the Epic which is a long, narrative poem about a hero (or heroine) and their heroic deeds and events. These poems are normally very cultural (e.g., the Iliad and the Odyssey, by Homer).

The longest poem ever written in the world is The Mahabharata, an Indian epic containing around 1.8 million words!

The style of poetry varies across cultures. For instance, in Japan the “Haiku” is the traditional poem and is very short, containing only three lines.

The syllabic formula for a traditional Haiku is 5-7-5, meaning the first line has five syllables, the second line has seven syllables, and the third line also has five syllables. Haikus rarely rhyme but have great simplicity.

POETICALLY SPOKEN

It may be practical to say that spoken word poetry has existed since the birth of poetry because it was performed orally. But the term ‘spoken word poetry’ has taken on a new meaning ever since the 1950s when it is believed to have achieved popularity. It originated and accelerated from the poetry of the Harlem Renaissance, blues, and the Beat Generation of the 1960s.

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Early in the 20th century, famous poets such as Robert Frost and Vachel Lindsay carried on the tradition of oral poetry by reading their works out loud.

A while later, Black cultures pulled their spoken word inspiration from sociopolitical literature and music. The Civil Rights Movement also inspired poignant spoken word pieces. Looking at Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” and Sojourner Truth’s iconic speech, “Ain’t I a Woman?” it’s easy to see how these oratory masterpieces influenced spoken word across the African-American community. The Last Poets, a poetry and political music group, was extracted out of the Civil Rights Movement and spoke realistically and artistically about the social problems that were contemporary at the time, and, perhaps, are still relevant today.

Their work really took spoken word to a new level.

Today, because of the influence of The Last Poets, spoken word often refers to social justice, race, politics, community, and current issues and events.

On another note, spoken word is sometimes coupled with live painting, music, and dancing to connect the subject matter with the audience.

POETICALLY THERAPEUTIC

“Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility.” This is my favorite definition of poetry coined by poet William Wordsworth. Can poetry be therapeutic? Yes, it can according to lifespeakspoetrytherapy.com! Poetry therapy is defined as “the intentional use of the written and spoken word for healing and personal growth.” This unique type of therapy helps individuals come to terms with their thoughts, emotions, opinions, and beliefs. It includes sessions where participants are prompted to emotionally respond to a chosen work of literature. These sessions also have facilitators who make participants create their own poems or prose in response to the given works of literature, which is a catalyst of healing and self-discovery.

Poetry therapy is also helpful because it likely leads to cathartic releases. Telling personal—or fictitious—stories through poetry, songs, or journals helps people find their own voices, greater awareness of self, ideas, and new hope.

Poetry is forever evolving and will constantly serve as food for the human soul.

Dream Dinners

PAINTING, LLC F.A. Madden Painting FRANK MADDEN, OWNER Office 336-766-7030 Cell 860-839-4575 famadden.painting@yahoo.com February 2019 | 109

FEBRUARY 8

KALEIDEUM AFTER DARK FEATURING ORANGE THEORY FITNESS

SECOND WEDNESDAYS

PROFESSIONAL WOMEN OF WINSTONSALEM MEETING

Love & Football is In The Air! SUPER BOWL LIII PARTY Sunday February 3rd Party Starts @ 4:00pm 53 Cent Super Bowl Specials Prizes!

VALENTINE’S DAY PARTY Bring your Sweetie in for Candlelight Dinner & Live Music Thursday February 14th Friday February 15th

Mac & Nellis Dinner & Wine Specials

Live Music & Events Every Night Tuesday Trivia Wednesday Karaoke Thursday - Friday & Saturday Live Local Music Saturday 2-4pm NEW Music Bingo Free to Play! Win Prizes Please check our Facebook page and website for music line-up and event times on our Facebook page or website!

11:30am-1pm, Flow Club at the BB&T Ballpark. Join PWWS for the monthly meeting.

Learn more at PWWS.org

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“MEET THE DENTIST” DAY

5-8pm, 1605 Westbrook Plaza Drive in W-S. Join us on February 4-8th & 11-15th (5-8pm) for Driver’s Education Class for teens ages 14.5-18. Class will cover the NC required 30 hours of classroom instruction. Each student will be scheduled for their 6 hours behind the wheel training at the completion of class. Visit www.greenbriardrivingacademy.com to enroll or learn more. Cost: $450/person.

FEBRUARY 5

FEBRUARY 10

1pm, Kaleideum North, 400 West Hanes Mill Road in W-S. Home-educated students in grades K-5 will explore how weather patterns form, create a cloud in a jar and examine weather-measuring instruments used by meteorologists. Pre-registration is required and group admission rates apply. Limited to 20 students. Register at www.kaleideum.org.

Cost: $5.50-$11.50/person.

2pm, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Join Edge Performing Arts for an engaging program of literature and movement! Learn about acceptance, with a side of silliness, as we read “Mother Bruce”

by Ryan T. Higgins. Participants will learn basic ballet movements and use these steps to help choreograph a dance to illustrate the book.

A perfect introduction to dance and a fun way to incorporate movement into literacy.

Included with admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

TEEN DRIVER’S EDUCATION CLASS

HOMESCHOOL/SMALL GROUP DAY: “WEATHER WONDERS”

GIRLS’ NIGHT OUT!

5pm-until…, Three Bulls American Steakhouse, 1480 River Ridge Drive in Clemmons. Grab a friend, neighbor, co-worker, mother, sister, SOMEBODY and have a much need Girls’ Night Out. Enjoy $5 raspberry lemonade sangrias! Also, register for TONS of prizes and giveaways!

FEBRUARY 5 & 12 THE BIG EAT

Downtown W-S. Participating local restaurants offer signature dishes at up to 50% off. It is a great opportunity to try a new restaurant and mix up your usual dining experience. The discount is for customers who eat in. The annual event helps locally owned restaurants get through the slower winter months.

Reservations are recommended for several restaurants that sell out for The Big Eat so be sure to call and book your Big Eat dinner early! Visit www.bigeatnc.com for more information.

KIDS’ MORNING OUT!

4926 Country Club Road | Winston-Salem, NC 27104 Monday - Thursday 3pm - 1am | Friday - Sunday - 11am - until

FEBRUARY 9

10:30am-1:30pm, Kaleideum North, 400 West Hanes Mill Road in W-S. Our friends from Spangler, Rohlfing & Lambert Pediatric Dentistry will introduce children to proper oral hygiene, discuss foods that keep teeth and gums healthy and demonstrate the tools that dentists and hygienists use to examine and clean teeth. This is a wonderful opportunity for kids to climb into a real dentist chair, brush and floss a giant mouth, and have lots of fun learning about their teeth! Included with admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

FEBRUARY 4

FEBRUARY 7

336.529.6230 macandnellisws.com

6-9pm, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. It’s a 21-and-up night for fun and fitness at the museum! Orange Theory will lead 30-minute high intensity workouts, Fiddlin’ Fish will provide beer, Carolina’s Vineyards & Hops will provide wine and DJ Hek Yeh will be spinning music. Cost: $15/person includes one drink ticket, one workout session and museum play. Pre-register at www.kaleideum.org and receive one additional drink ticket for free!

Admission also available at the door.

9am-1pm, Hoots and Hollers, 5336 Robinhood Village in W-S. Registration required. Join us for a special KMO! Hoots and Hollers is offering a make-and-take art project. Due to limited space, registration is required. Due to popular demand, we will offer four one-hour long art sessions. You will be notified via email if you are selected for the 9am, 10am, 11am or 12pm slot. Please register at tinyurl.com/ FFFebKMO. Snacks will be available as well.

Each adult attendee will receive four tickets for our fabulous prize board!

STORY DANCE: “MOTHER BRUCE”

FEBRUARY 12

ANGEL BEAR YOGA: “VALENTINE’S DAY”

11am, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Angel Bear joins us for a class full of hugs and kisses! Bring the story “A Book of Hugs” to life to celebrate Valentine’s Day as we do cupid and bow & arrow poses and send love to our families! Meet a special furry friend, too!

Included with admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

FEBRUARY 14

PEPPERCORN THEATRE SONGS AND STORIES

9:30am, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Teaching Artists share songs, stories and activities designed for babies, toddlers and their caregivers to play and grow together. Enjoy live music, hands-on props and puppets with these storytellers! Included with museum admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

BIG BANDS ARE FOR LOVERS

6:30-10:30pm, Millennium Center, 101 West 5th Street in W-S. Join Camel City Jazz Orchestra (and surprise musical guests) for an evening of fine dining and dancing to the classic sounds of big band music. Admission ($75/person) includes passed hors d’oeuvres, a glass of sparkling wine and a plated three-course dinner with table service. Surf and turf, turf only and vegetarian options available. Suggested wine pairings with dinner and selections from a full bar will be available for purchase. www.camelcityjazz.org

FEBRUARY 15

FEBRUARY 19

7-9pm, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Bring your special girl for an evening of dancing, Valentine’s crafts and delicious desserts! You’ll also receive a cherished photo keepsake that will be emailed to you after the event.

(Printed portraits and electronic copies available for purchase on site.)

Pre-registration required at www. kaleideum.org for both children and adults: $10 for Kaleideum members; $12 for non-members. (Inclement weather date: Friday, March 1st.)

10-11:30am, Kaleideum North, 400 West Hanes Mill Road in W-S. For children ages 2-4 with an adult caregiver. In February, we draw hearts and hand out Valentine’s treats, but how much do we know about the organ that keeps us alive? Participate in science demonstrations about the heart, learn about the properties of blood and make crafts about the human body. Kaleideum members: $8 per adult/child pair; non-members: $10 per adult/child pair (includes museum admission). Register at www.kaleideum.org.

DADDY/DAUGHTER DANCE & DESSERTS

FEBRUARY 15-17

HEALING YOGA FOR CANCER WEEKEND INTENSIVE

Sunrise Yoga Studio, 6000 Meadowbrook Mall Court, Suite 1 in Clemmons. This weekend immersion for yoga teachers and health care practitioners teaches the theory and practice of yoga therapy for cancer patients and survivors and how both active and contemplative practices can help ease treatment side-effects.

Register via the website, Sunrise Yoga app, phone or at the studio. Cost: $240-$275/person. www.sunriseyoga. net/yoga-workshops

FEBRUARY 16

80S THROWBACK PARTY

7-11pm, Medaloni Cellars, 9125 Shallowford Road. Join us for a night of throwback 80s music from a guest DJ. Please visit our website for more information!

AN EVENING WITH RICKY SKAGGS, WINSTON-SALEM SYMPHONY 7:30pm, 301 North Hawthorne Road in W-S. Enjoy an evening of bluegrass, gospel, Americana and more as 15-time GRAMMY winner and music legend Ricky Skaggs joins the Symphony for a special onenight only performance! Considered a “recognized master” of one of America’s most demanding art forms at the age of 21, Ricky will lead the Symphony on a musical journey through his greatest hits, beloved standards and songs that have shaped his career and life. Visit www. wssymphony.org/event/ricky-skaggs for more information.

FEBRUARY 18

SENSORY FRIENDLY MONDAY

9am-12pm, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Children with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and sensory processing differences are invited to have a fun and interactive learning experience in a comfortable, accepting environment!

Sensory Friendly Mondays are offered once a month, Sept. through May, on Members-only Mondays when museum attendance is generally light.

You don’t have to be a member to attend, but admission or membership is required. Modifications include choice boards and a designated quiet room. Learn more at www.downtown. kaleideum.org/visit/accessibility.

PRESCHOOL SCIENCE CLASS: “ALL ABOUT THE HEART!”

YOGA STORYTIME WITH CALM COTTONTAIL

3pm, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Enjoy a reading of “Charlotte and the Quiet Place,” a heartwarming book about finding your own quiet place in a busy and loud world.

Then explore yoga poses and meditations to inspire finding your own special place and opening your eyes to the beauty of the world. A special animal friend will make an appearance! Included with admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

FEBRUARY 21

COREY SMITH LIVE AT THE RAMKAT

8-10:30pm, The RamKat, 170 West 9th Street in W-S. Corey Smith, the fan-made man, has sold more than one million concert tickets, 1.5 million digital singles and more than 220,000 albums. Cost: $20-$55/ person. smarturl.it/CSWinstonS

FEBRUARY 21-24

MARISA BARATELLI SOCIAL OCCASION TRUNK SHOW

Nitsa’s, 107 South Stratford Road in W-S. Nitsa’s offers the finest selection of designer couture bridal gowns, bridesmaid dresses, veils, accessories, social occasion and cocktail dresses, and sportswear. As the Carolinas’ Couture Bridal Salon, Nitsa’s provides its signature personal service and exceptional inhouse alterations. Fabulous since 1964! www.nitsas.com

FEBRUARY 22

NATIONAL MARGARITA DAY

Foothills Brewing, Downtown Brewpub, 638 West 4th Street in W-S. Break out your salt shakers and lime wedges and head over to the pub to celebrate National Margarita Day! Pour me something tall and strong, make it a.... Barrel-Aged Margarita? Aged two months in oak barrels, this citrusy concoction is ready to help you celebrate La Dia del Margarita.

For those with milder sensibilities, we will also have regular margaritas (quite a few flavors to choose from, actually). Cost: $8-$10/margarita. Find our event on Facebook!

FEBRUARY 28

PEPPERCORN THEATRE SONGS & STORIES

9:30am, Kaleideum Downtown, 390 South Liberty Street in W-S. Teaching Artists share songs, stories and activities designed for babies, toddlers and their caregivers to play and grow together. Enjoy live music, hands-on props and puppets with these storytellers! Included with museum admission and free for Kaleideum members. www.kaleideum.org

Wine Merchants WINE SHOP HOURS Monday CLOSED Tuesday - Saturday 10:00 AM to 9:00 PM Sunday 10:00 AM to 3 PM

BISTRO HOURS Dinner: Tuesday - Saturday 4:00 PM to 9:30 PM Lunch: Friday 11:30 AM to 3:00 PM Brunch: Saturday & Sunday 10:00 AM to 3:00 PM

FEBRUARY 28-MARCH 3

FRASCARA & WAYNE CLARK TRUNK SHOW

Nitsa’s, 107 South Stratford Road in W-S. Nitsa’s offers the finest selection of couture bridal gowns, bridesmaid dresses, veils, accessories, social occasion and cocktail dresses, sportswear and cosmetics. As the Carolinas’ Couture Bridal Salon, Nitsa’s provides its signature personal service and exceptional in-house alterations. Fabulous since 1964! www.nitsas.com

Vin205.com 205 S. Stratford Rd. Suite N Winston-Salem, NC 27103 (336) 765-8175 February 2019 | 111

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Bark of the Town . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 Bloomday Granite & Marble . . . . . . . . . . . . 115 Brookstown Inn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 Budget Blinds. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Busy as a Bee Concierge . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91

C

Carolina Characters . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Carolyn’s Baby Cakes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Castle Lights . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95 Chermak & Hanson . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99 Chest Caddy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 Christina’s Dessertery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 81 Chrystal Yates . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Clemmons Bicycle Shop . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99 Collegiate Shop . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55 Crossfit Polydamus. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85 Crystal Cleaners . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

D

Davie Tavern . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79 Dawson Tree Service . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Dream Dinners . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109

E

Emerson Designs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95,105 Express Oil Change. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 81

F

F.A. Madden Painting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109 Farrago . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63,105 Footnote Coffee & Cocktails . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61 Forsyth Plasic Surgery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73 Fraleigh’s Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91

G

Get Vocal . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89 Gifts & Paper on Plaza . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73 Goin’ Postal . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93 Goldman Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4

H

HakkaChow. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35 Hauser Rental . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93 Hillcrest Vision . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85 Hip Chics Boutique. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7 Homestead Hills . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 House Matters Lawncare. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99

I

iHeart Radio . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107,113 Inner Strength Pilates . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87

J

Jeffrey Adams on Fourth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67 June DeLugas Interiors . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31

K

Kim Taylor & Co. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61 Kortney Beam Designs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104

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L

Laster’s Fine Art & Antiques . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91 Lewisville Laser & Aesthetics . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 LuLaRoe, Amy Daniels . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105 Lyndhurst . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

M

Mac & Nellis . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110 Mainstream Boutique . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 49 Marzano Captial Group . . . . . . . . . . Back Cover Massage Envy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19 Medi Weightloss. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 Men Who Cook . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53 Mountain Valley Hospice. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93 My Grace-Full Life . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105

N

Nu. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 69

O

One Crafty Miss. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71 Our Wig Boutique. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

P

Papparazzi Hair Salon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39

Pat’s Body Shop . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 Photo Arttistry by Melinda . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101 Piedmont Advantage Credit Union . . . . . . . 49 Piedmont Federal Savings Bank. . . . . . . . . . 23 Professional Women of Winston-Salem . . . 97 Providence Kitchen . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

R

Rave Beauty . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83 ReDESIGNS by Ava . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 Restoration MedSpa . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2 Rodan + Fields, Kelley Carnall . . . . . . . . . . 104

S

Salem Detailing, Evan Wiles . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 Salem Plastic Surgery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67 Salem Smiles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63 Salemtowne . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 Second Harvest Food Bank . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57 Sharon Reid, DDS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55 Simply Sterling & Co. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Singing Bird Salon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 Sixth Sense Health & Wellness Center. . . . . 37 Southern Signature Properties. . . . . . . . . . . 71 Starboard Accounting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83

Stitches . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89 Summit Eye Care . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16

T

Three Bulls American Steakhouse . . . . . . . . 25 Torque Performance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85 Trellis Supportive Care. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29 Triad Mac. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89 True Culler Advertising & Apparel . . . . . . . 101 Two Maids. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79

U

United Way . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 Urbn grl . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99

V

Village Inn Event Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 75

W

Wayne Collins Electric . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 91 WFBH Outpatient Imaging . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95 WFBH Cosmtic Surgery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65 Windsor Jewelers. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 Wine Merchants . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 111 WomanCare . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77

iHeart Radio

February 2019 | 113

Conversations with Your BFF How Do I Deal with

BY REBECCA COOPER

Toxic People?

I think we would all agree that it is important to give our bodies a break from ‘toxic’ food and alcohol. We know that fast food every day isn’t good for us and downing a bottle of wine or a six pack every night isn’t a wise choice to stay healthy. But what about taking a break or removing toxic people from our lives? Isn’t your mental health as important as your physical body? Is it even possible to get those who would bring you down and spew their negativity out of your life? Well, I’m glad you asked!

TOXIC PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS ‘RIGHT,’ BUT RARELY HONEST

Some people are always going to find ways to be right even when they are not, and then they rarely admit when they’ve blown it. Toxic people usually have issues with being honest; not the little white lies, but blatant and repeated patterns of lying to better serve themselves.

TOXIC PEOPLE LOVE TO BE VICTIMS

A toxic person lives to be a victim of the world. They will literally seek to find ways to feel oppressed and put down in ways they clearly are not. The world is against them, and they will make every excuse or rationalization to convince you that the world and everyone in it is out to get them. It gets tiring being on the listening end of a toxic person’s list of ‘woe is me.’

Toxic people can do a number on your head and your heart and, unfortunately, you may need to let them go to stay sane and mentally healthy. Whether the person is a family member or a friend, you do not have to stay in a relationship with a person who is manipulative, selfish or abusive, physically or mentally. It doesn’t get any worse than to realize that a loved one is a poisonous presence, but it is also very necessary.

We all have relationships that are challenging, with personality conflicts, but if a relationship is hurting you and affecting your well-being, that’s not okay. You have to accept that not everyone can be ‘saved’ with love and kindness and it’s not your job to change someone or help them see the need to make a change.

Remember, no one changes anything about themselves because someone else points it out; they change because they see a need to make that change. In all cases, toxicity exists on a spectrum. On one end is the friend who won’t let the conversation go on how you don’t spend enough time together doing things, then there’s the ex who is still able to manipulate you into a rage. Your friend may be irritating and frustrating, but your ex is definitely toxic. You have to make the call on who requires distance and when they may need to be cut from your life completely. To make these calls, you may need a litmus test to understand true toxicity.

114 | ForsythWoman.com

TOXIC PEOPLE DON’T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

TOXIC PEOPLE WANT TO CONTROL YOU

This may sound strange, but people who aren’t in control of their own lives, love to try and control yours. A toxic person will seek ways to control you, either through overt actions or subtle manipulation, sometimes even making you think it was your idea or choice.

TOXIC PEOPLE DON’T ACCEPT BOUNDARIES

Toxic people can drain your emotional ‘gas tank’ by constantly pushing you to work harder to please them, making you compromise more and more. This is exhausting and pushes the boundaries of any healthy relationship. Don’t let your ‘tank’ be on empty before you put a stop to this!

TOXIC PEOPLE TAKE WITHOUT GIVING

Give and take is just a part of a true friendship. Sometimes you need a hand, and sometimes your friend does, but in the end, it evens out. This isn’t the case with a toxic person – they are often there to take what they can get from you as long as you’re willing to give, but don’t expect them to be giving to you – the concept of reciprocity is lost on them.

Going along with the victim mentality is a desire to avoid responsibility. When the world is against you, the toxic person’s choices and actions can’t possibly be responsible for the quality of their life… they believe ‘it’s just the way things are in this unfair world.’ They have nothing to do with their plight in life – again, it’s someone else’s fault.

If you take a good hard look at yourself, hopefully, you see a caring and kind person, striving to treat everyone equally.

That effort is admirable, but it doesn’t mean all relationships are equal. Great people will make important contributions to your life, and your happiness, joy, and success will be increased because of it; however toxic people tend to create a lot of problems but contribute little, or sadly, nothing, positive to your life, only sucking the joy out of it. You don’t have to be mean to toxic people; you can treat toxic people with respect without giving them the attention they do not deserve.

To preserve your sanity, stop treating all relationships as equal and start giving your time to those who are truly worthy of it. Value yourself enough to know when others don’t value you.

Bllomday Granite & Marble

Beautifully crafted surfaces, outstanding customer service.

Visit Our Showroom at 3810 Indiana Avenue, Winston-Salem, NC | 336-724-0300 | www.bloomdaygranite.com February 2019 | 115

Marzano Captial Group

116 | ForsythWoman.com