Messiness and the Whispers of God

BY MICHAEL JOHNSON

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of the intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the beauty in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that one life has breathed easier because you lived here. This is to have succeeded.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is a backyard in a shining suburb just south of WinstonSalem. It is a placid autumnal day; a SUV door is swung open and bountiful provisions from the local big-box store are unloaded. The resounding laughter of children rings out. There are two jovial, angelic sisters, ages 8 and 6, who are playing a make-believe game with their neighborhood friend. Their pure unadulterated joy trumpets from the swing set and trees. It appears that all is right in the world.

The Tuckers live here. The scene suggests this is a typical family. And yet, their journey and victory versus childhood cancer has tossed them onto a pedestal they may not have particularly wanted in the first place.

Chad and Meredith Tucker have graciously agreed to meet for an interview to speak about their unending crusade to shine a light upon childhood cancer. The disease swooped down upon them and darkened their door three years ago when their middle child, Pearl Monroe (“Roe Roe”), was diagnosed with leukemia. Meredith was 22 weeks pregnant at the time with their son, and COVID was just around the corner. To say the Tuckers have faced challenges is the most monumental understatement of the century.

“I just knew something was wrong. Roe Roe just wasn’t herself. She was hurting. She literally started crawling again at the age of three because it was less painful than walking,” says Meredith. The diagnostic tests began in earnest with Roe Roe’s doctor. No one seemed able to piece together what exactly was wrong. That was before the inevitable blood tests that revealed the identity of her body’s enemy.

Chad remembers the doctor calling him at work just before he was to go on as the anchor for the WGHP 4:00 news. “I just went into my boss and said that my daughter has leukemia. I broke down in front of him and said that I needed to go home. I remember thinking, how was I supposed to explain this to Meredith? How am I supposed to tell her this?” He exhales, catches his breath, and says, “I remember, though, that I had a peace I couldn’t identify. I just knew it was all going to be fine. I was at peace, but I remember it as the longest drive home ever.” “I couldn’t bring myself to think this out loud, but cancer was probably a diagnosis I heard in my mind. When Chad told me that, in fact, leukemia was the diagnosis, after he spoke with the doctor, something in me just died,” says Meredith. She says, “I just remember someone at a restaurant service counter asking us soon after the diagnosis about how our day had been. The irony of that simple beautiful question. They had no idea what had just happened.” Meredith didn’t stop crying for days, but then steeled herself into action.

Cue the acceleration into hurt, acceptance, anger, guilt, “roid rage” for Roe Roe, with her steroid treatments that led to her screaming at all hours of the day and night. There were the explanations to Carson Parry, the big sister, about how this was not the “real Roe Roe,” and that grace and understanding were to be the orders of the day. heroic figures in this story. Her role as the eldest child catapulted her into that of caretaker. She has had to stand valiantly off to the side of the limelight for Roe Roe in her own courageous journey. While it was not always easy for Carson Parry, she has ultimately remained a pillar of steadfast support even at such a tender age. Chad notes that the fundraiser they will hold once again this spring will focus on the role of siblings of those who are diagnosed. There is a framed picture in the Tuckers’ home showing Carson Parry carrying Roe Roe in her arms at the apex of chemotherapy treatments. It is an unforgettable image of a selfless sister cradling her weakened sibling.

Chad speaks of “the whispers of God.” This is the undercurrent of murmurs from the universe embedded in the challenging chapters of life. Chad and Meredith have been overwhelmingly affected by the smallest of gestures from friends and strangers alike. They emotionally tell tales of strangers who have provided cards, words of encouragement and gifts for the family. A profoundly moving expression came in the form of their mortgage being paid while they were swimming in the mire of medical bills.

Chad and Meredith want the public to know that they can do anything, big or small, to help anyone dealing with childhood cancer. They both say, “People should just show up. Be present. Don’t turn away from those who are dealing with the messiness of this. Don’t ask, just tell people you are doing something for them and do it.”

The conversation turns to what people can literally do to join the fight against childhood cancer. Chad emphatically states, “Only about 4% of all cancer research funding is allocated to childhood cancer. Write to your lawmakers. Vote with attention to what your candidate’s position is on research for childhood cancer. We need to ask our lawmakers where they stand on this.” The arduous unfathomable odyssey culminated with Roe Roe ringing the bell at Brenner Children’s Hospital after her last day of treatment on her 6th birthday, March 28th, this year. She is thankfully in remission and exudes a spirit behind her radiant blue eyes that is instantaneously obvious to anyone. Roe Roe has a heart that beats loud and proud with resilience and a boundless joy that would have been sloughed off by many others in the depths of such a battle. If you ever have the honor of meeting her, you, too, will come away with the notion that she herself is a “whisper of God” and a miracle of the highest order. She has endured the messiness of a fight she never deserved. But make no mistake; she is the ultimate warrior princess.

In 2021, Meredith started the Roe Roe’s Heroes Childhood Cancer Foundation, named in honor of the community of people who supported their family. The foundation helps local families who don’t have a community support system with immediate assistance, while helping celebrate the siblings of children battling cancer.

The foundation also awards several nursing scholarships named in honor of Roe Roe’s beloved nurse, Nancy Smith, and teams up with Roc Solid Foundation in building playsets in the backyards of kids who cannot leave their home while fighting cancer. You can learn more at roeroesheroes.org and make taxdeductible donations directly to:

Roe Roe’s Heroes

PO Box 1873, King, NC 27021.

What If?

Presents Buying Ideal Land BY LISA S.T. DOSS

“What-if?”—the worrisome words arrive in the conscious spinning topics in our mind, from safety and financial security to loved ones and pet health. Asking, “What can I do?” leads to a proactive decision to invest time in the ultimate insurance policy—valuable life skills comprising security, shelter, food, water, and medical care! In any emergency, from extreme weather to a personal disaster, you have the power to take charge of your fate by making plans and taking action!

The dream of escaping from traffic and the city’s bright lights in search of ample space, privacy, and fresh air does not have to be a fantasy. In the quest for the ideal property to fulfill your dreams of self-sufficiency, whether your definition entails planting an orchard, raising sheep and goats, or being closer to mountains and trees, planning and research are primary!

Finding a Great Small Town

Surrounding Winston-Salem, you’ll find rural communities of smallbusiness owners, farmers, ranchers, artisans, and those who don’t mind driving to work. Visiting local businesses, you’ll quickly discover the appeal of small town and country life. Store owners and neighbors offer invaluable information, recommendations, and helpful resources. Intimate living also means residents will be curious about your history and life; therefore, take the time to wave, learn names, ask questions, and develop relationships.

In addition:

• Visit the historical locations to learn more about the people and places of a potential residence.

• Join a group in the area and attend the local festivals.

• Find a social media platform to learn about the positives and problems within the county’s government.

Ask Yourself Questions

The dream of land ownership comes with the benefits of lowered monthly expenses, from mortgage costs to annual taxes; yet, you should start thinking about the bigger picture through the following questions.

• What is the additional mileage to work and favorite shopping sites going to cost, monthly? An alternative is finding local cost-effective stores or markets to buy produce, meats, and apparel.

• Does the location have internet access? Not every rural location has a large bandwidth; therefore, you might experience freezes or problems using your cell phone.

• How often do the residents experience electricity outages? Is investing in a propane range, tankless water heater, and generator a viable, costeffective solution? • Will you need farm equipment? How expensive are used or new attachments—for example, a tiller and bush hog?

• Will your potential animals require water; will it come from a well, or does the property have access to a pond or year-round creeks?

• How do I access the county’s plan for development to determine how rural life may change in the future?

NC State Cooperative Extension Benefits

In each of our 100 counties, all North Carolina residents have access to a research-based resource—specialized agents who engage with farmers, businesses, and families to determine solutions. Whether the need is to understand soil types, planting methods, preparing land for livestock, raising animals, or controlling pests, predators, or invasive species, an agent can schedule a house call and put science and research-based tools to work! Transitioning to a country lifestyle also means having the state’s resources rooting for your success!

Real-Estate Agents

The times have changed! Websites allow you to freely peruse a database of houses or available land in a particular county. Take the time and sign up to receive property alerts and learn about the agents in your perspective area. In advance, create a checklist of necessary accommodations, such as a house, access to water sources, buildings, and fencing. Not every property will fulfill your needs; however, narrowing down the “must-haves” will help when you find the location that screams, “This is it!”

Owning acreage is a choice of the heart and a change of perspective. The desire for a meticulously mowed lawn will be replaced by the enjoyment of raising goats and growing wildflowers. Fishing poles may remain on the front porch, rather than be used minimally across two seasons. You’ll find peace, clear starry nights, longrange neighbors, and unexpected relationships with postal workers, police officers, and small business owners. Country living is slower, and reaching destinations will take more time and patience; yet, there’s nothing comparable to the gratification of self-sufficiency, land ownership, and the outpouring of community support!

Tis the Season for Holly! Have a Holly Jolly Christmas!

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

From decking the halls with boughs of holly and singing traditional Christmas carols like “The Holly and the Ivy,” holly berries and deep dark green holly leaves are expressions of the jolly!

Celebrate this Christmas and holiday season with the classic red of holly berries and greenery. Gather some holly boughs and enjoy DIY arts and crafts to make ideal decorations and gifts.

Decorate with a few sprigs of holly clippings around candles, on tables, on mantles, and in unexpected places, such as in a vase, teapot, teacup, or mug. Deck your door with a stunning and super easy homemade holly wreath. Just cut some holly branches, add a bit of twining ivy and/or a few evergreen boughs, such as fir, pine needles, or spruce, then tuck in some candy canes and add a red ribbon bow as a finishing touch to match the bright berries.

The season for gift giving includes lots of gift wrapping. Add simple seasonable splendor to any package with a sprig of holly tied down with a red, green, white, gold, or silver ribbon, and then dangle an ornament atop, or add a merry jingle bell.

Jolly Holly Berrylicious Sparkling Merry-Garita

ʼTis the season to feel merry and jolly! Whether you prefer a margarita or a spritzer (cocktail or mocktail) or both, enjoy this versatile beverage to celebrate Christmas and the holidays. You decide…the ratio of sparkling liquids to strawberries depends on your preference in beverages.

INGREDIENTS: Choose from the following: • Prosecco, champagne, or sparkling rose (for sparkling spritzer version) • Vodka or gin • Tonic water, club soda/seltzer, or ginger beer (for mocktail version) • Pomegranate and/or cranberry juice • Iced white or green tea (to amp up on antioxidants) • Muddled or puréed strawberries • Strawberry, cherry/grenadine, or pomegranate simple syrup to sweeten • Mint/thyme/strawberry slices/pomegranate seeds (for edible garnishes) • Ice (on the rocks, optional)

INSTRUCTIONS: • Margarita version: Blend/purée fresh or frozen strawberries along with liquids of choice (like cold tea) and add in simple syrup or sweetener of choice (optional). • Spritzer version: Mash fresh strawberries with a fork and add to bottom of glass.

Combine liquid ingredients over top.

Holly Jolly Pomegranate Mint Chocolate Mousse

(Vegan, Gluten Free, Sugar-Free and Paleo)

INGREDIENTS: • 1½ cups coconut milk • 6 Tablespoons Cacao or unsweetened cocoa • 1½ Tablespoons pomegranate and/or cranberry juice • 1¼ teaspoon peppermint extract • Stevia, maple syrup, honey, blue agave, or other sweetener to taste (optional) • 3-6 pomegranate seeds or dried cranberries and sprigs of fresh mint (edible garnishes)

INSTRUCTIONS: • Blend together all ingredients, except garnishes, with a whisk until bubbles form. • Pour into 2 large or 4 small ramekins and set in fridge for at least 4 hours, ideally overnight. • Add jolly holly-esque edible garnishes over top. • Serve when set and enjoy! (Recipe adapted from: veganfamilyrecipes. com/vegan-mint-chocolate mousse/)

DIY Ravishing Red Holly Berry Inspired Red Lip Color

(Organic and Natural)

Love classic red? Well, it’s the season for holly berry lips! Get your glam on this gift season, gorgeous, and make your own DIY red lip color for you and your gal pals!

INGREDIENTS: • 1 teaspoon organic beeswax pellets • 1 teaspoon organic shea butter • 1 teaspoon grapeseed oil/apricot kernel/ avocado oil • ⅛ teaspoon each of any combination of red carmine mica, red Australian clay, russet iron oxide, honey beige mica, antique rose mica, and/or red food coloring • 3 drops peppermint essential oil • 3 lip balm containers

INSTRUCTIONS:

• Melt the beeswax, shea butter and oil of choice together on low heat in a double boiler. • Once melted, remove from heat, add color pigments and blend together with a manual whip. • Pour immediately into lip balm containers before mixture starts to harden completely. • If mixture has already started to harden, put the bowl back in the double boiler and melt again until you can pour back into the lip balm containers. (Recipe adapted from organic-beauty-recipes. com/natural-red-lipstick-recipe/)

Holly is a symbol of fertility and eternal life, because it remains strong and green throughout the winter, while other trees drop their leaves. From ancient times to today, holly has symbolized good luck and protection, and it’s as easy as gathering a few branches to bring holly’s good fortune to you and yours.