A New Milestone: Home Alone

It begins with a separation by walls inside the home and later extends to the outdoors. Communication is still present, “I will be outdoors working in the garden.” And then, the question, “Do you want to come with me?” Parents cannot help but want to keep their children close by to ensure physical and emotional safety. In North Carolina, a child cannot remain at home, unsupervised, including within a vehicle, until the age of eight; only then can a child be left alone for a maximum of two hours. By age 12, children can legally remain home for up to three hours during the daytime.

QUESTIONS

• Not every child has the emotional maturity to remain alone. Here are a few questions parents can ask themselves to ensure readiness. • Does your child follow the rules and demonstrate responsibility with housework, personal chores, and homework? • Can your child work well independently? • Does your child make the right decisions? • How are unexpected situations handled?

Does your child remain calm or panic? • How does your child feel when spending time alone?

ESTABLISHING HOUSE RULES

Every household has different circumstances and rules. Perhaps children are allowed to go into the backyard, visit with a friendly neighbor, but not open the door or answer the phone. With a goal not to create too many rules, it’s critical to establish the same standards when you are home as when you are gone, while emphasizing specific guidelines. • Are friends allowed over, either outdoors or inside the home? • Can the door open for strangers? • What about the telephone? Can kids call their friends? Answer the phone when it rings? • Are there rules about television, the

Internet, or using electronic devices? Is there a warning about openly stating the words “home alone” on social media? • What rules do you have about using the kitchen, explicitly operating appliances, or using utensils?

COMMUNICATION

Phone watches are a popular and convenient tool to help parents and children communicate when a landline is not present. Parents can control contacts by adding up to seven phone numbers. After a period of rings, some “smartwatches” will automatically open the line for one minute. Watch owners can receive texts and select pre-written responses, such as “yes,” “no,” “okay,” and a few others. For parents who are not ready to invest in a smartphone, the phone watch, offering an accurate GPS, is an ideal and inexpensive option to monitor a child’s movements.

ADDITIONAL QUESTIONS:

• Who is your emergency contact? Is it the next-door neighbor, a nearby family down the street, or a grandparent? If your

child feels endangered, designate a “safe house” for your child to go to if they have a unique circumstance. (It’s a good idea to inform immediate neighbors, if they are part of your plan.) Ensure that children memorize essential personal information, such as parents’ and grandparents’ names, addresses, and phone numbers. • Children need reassurance; please allow them to call you just to talk or share what they are doing. Create “check-ins” every half-hour or hour.

MAKE A PRACTICE RUN

Practicing to fulfill the next milestone involves an ongoing activity and dialogue. Your child should know how and when to call 911, operate the home security system, and what to do if smoke appears, an alarm sounds, or a power outage occurs. Take a 30-minute to an hour practice run, while keeping all lines of communication open. Give your child options for what he/she can do, such as watching a favorite television program, continuing building a model, or completing a list of tasks. As parents return home, talk about any problems or concerns. Keep talking about possible scenarios, such as handling the doorbell or answering the phone. As kids hear worse-case situations, they are more likely to respond favorably!

THE BUDDY SYSTEM

Siblings are fortunate, despite their personal feelings, to have another person in the home as a means of companionship and comfort. “Only” children may also consider a family pet, such as a dog, cat, or hamster, as a suitable friend. With preparation and practice, parents and kids will feel comfortable spending time independently, apart!

CELEBRATES 30 YEARS OF IMPACT WITH CRISIS CONTROL MINISTRY

It’s an incredible thing to think that thirty years ago, what started out as an idea to save the food pantry at Crisis Control Ministry grew into the incredible outreach program and local tradition it is today. Hope du Jour has not only continued to make a difference to the Crisis Control Ministry and the citizens it serves, but to the community as a whole by bringing people together for something we can all agree on: great food! This year’s Hope du Jour event is on Tuesday, September 8th celebrating its 30th anniversary where participating restaurants will donate what they are able to Crisis Control Ministry, Forsyth County’s largest provider of emergency assistance. Members of the community can come out to show their support for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert!

What makes this event so special you may wonder? Margaret Elliot, the Executive Director shares that “People go out just because it’s Hope du Jour! They look forward to it every year!” When Candide Jones, then the WinstonSalem Journal restaurant reviewer, and Patti Hoffman, the Crisis Control Ministry Director at the time, came together to make the fundraiser a reality, they started with an ambitious 40 restaurants. The goal was to raise money for the food pantry while helping local restaurants increase sales on Tuesday nights, one of their traditionally lower volume business times. Naturally, the first Hope du Jour was an immediate success and has now led to this year’s 30th-anniversary event, to include over 125 restaurants, bakeries, breweries, coffee shops, and even a few other small businesses! You can find a Hope du Jour restaurant to dine out at in Winston-Salem, Rural Hall, Walkertown, Kernersville, Clemmons, and Lewisville. Residents of Forsyth Country who have experienced an unavoidable financial crisis such as a health issue, unemployment, or car repair are able to come to Crisis Control Ministry for temporary assistance with food, housing, utilities, and even medication. Abbey Riesett, the Special Events & Marketing Manager for the Crisis Control Ministry, shared that last year, the ministry assisted 13,902 of our neighbors with a total value of $2,921,247 through their efforts and the generosity of the community. While there are 18 employees and 202 weekly volunteers helping to change the lives of these individuals who are experiencing unfortunate circumstances, the community that comes together for Hope du Jour each year truly is part of the Crisis Control family as well!

We’re living in a time where the false narrative that “everyone is out for themselves” rings loudly, but Hope du Jour challenges that thought and reminds us that true community exists and thrives right here! Stephen M. Kroustalis of Plaza Restaurant continues to be part of Hope du Jour each year and shared why he is proud to take part in the event. ”I do not wish to live in the type of world where we do not look out for each other. By that, I mean not just those that are family and close to us, but also anybody that may need a helping hand. We never know what the future brings, but BY TARYN JEREZ having a support organization like Crisis Control is of paramount importance. I am grateful to be able to do my small part in helping Crisis Control each year, as I know the cause is a worthy one.” Other long term participants such as Village Tavern, Waldo’s Wings, Midtown Cafe & Dessertery, and Diamondback Grill have also seen the impact Hope du Jour can make and continue to take part because of it. Hope du Jour even adds a little friendly competition in the mix by presenting awards in three different categories each year. The 2019 winners were: • Largest Donation - Don Juan’s Mexican

Restaurant in Kernersville (4th consecutive year of winning) • Largest Donation from a First Time

Restaurant - Yamas Mediterranean

Street Food • Largest Donation Increase over Previous

Year - Village Tavern, Griffith Rd. location As each year’s efforts and participation continues to expand, the potential to change the lives of community members exponentially expands with it. This year you are invited to bring your loved ones to come hungry and make an impact on September 8th for the Hope du Jour 30th Anniversary Event! For a full list of participating restaurants or to become a sponsor, please visit hopedujour.org. If you’d like more information about how you can get involved with Crisis Control Ministry or to learn about how the Ministry serves our neighbors in crisis, please head to their website at crisiscontrol.org.

Eat Out. Take Out. Help Out.

Dine out for a good cause on Tuesday, September 8, at restaurants donating what they are able to Crisis Control Ministry. Find participating restaurants at hopedujour.org.

PARTICIPATING RESTAURANTS

Winston-Salem Restaurants

6th & Vine Alma Mexicana

Arigato Japanese Steak & Seafood B.L.L. Rotisserie Factory Bagel Station, Oakwood Dr.

Bagel Station, N. Peacehaven Rd. Baked Just So The Basil Leaf Thai & Sushi

Bernardin’s Restaurant

Bib’s Downtown Black Mountain Chocolate Bleu Restaurant & Bar Bobo’s Deli & Grill Burke Street Pizza, Burke St. Burke Street Pizza, Robinhood Rd.

Café Arthur’s

Café Gelato, Reynolda Rd. Café Gelato, Hawthorne Rd.

Cagney’s Kitchen

Camel City BBQ Factory Camino Bakery, Brookstown Camino Bakery, W. Fourth St. Camino Bakery, WF Baptist Canteen Market & Bistro Carmine Italian Restaurant

The Carriage House Restaurant The Carving Board

Cin Cin Burger Bar

Cloverdale Kitchen Coppola’s Pizzeria & Italian Restaurant

Cowboy Brazilian Steakhouse Dewey’s Bakery, Reynolda Rd Dewey’s Bakery, Thruway Di Lisio’s Italian Restaurant Diamondback Downtown

Diamondback Grill Downtown Deli

Duck Donuts East Coast Wings & Grill, Country Club

Elizabeth’s Pizza, Silas Creek Pkwy Elizabeth’s Pizza, University Pkwy

Fiddlin’ Fish Brewing Company The Flour Box Tea Rooms Foothills Brewing Footnote Forsyth Seafood Market & Café Fratellis Italian Steakhouse Goody’s Restaurant

Grecian Corner

HakkaChow Hero House, Inc. Honky Tonk Smokehouse The Katharine Brasserie & Bar Kilwins

Kimono Japanese Restaurant & Sushi

La Carreta Mexican Rest., Peacehaven Rd. La Carreta Mexican Rest., Robinhood Rd.

Lighthouse Grill

Little Richard‘s BBQ, Stratford Rd. Full Bleed Local 27101 Los Toritos Mexican Cuisine Mama Zoe Michael’s Mayberry Ice Cream Restaurant, W. 4th St. Mayberry Ice Cream Restaurant, Miller St. Mellow Mushroom

Midtown Cafe & Dessertery

Milner’s American Southern Miss Ora’s Kitchen Mozelle’s

The Old Fourth Street Filling Station

O’So Eats

P.B.’s Takeout

The Porch Kitchen and Cantina Providence Restaurant Quiet Pint Tavern River Birch Lodge

Rooster’s, A Noble Grille Ryan’s Restaurant Salem Kitchen

The Sherwood Silvia’s Honey Tree Sixty Six Grill and Taphouse

Sweet Potatoes-A Restaurant Szechuan Palace

Tart Sweets

TJ’s Deli & Grill

Tre Nonne Italian Restaurant

Village Tavern, Hanes Mall Blvd. Village Tavern, Reynolda Village Vincenzo’s Italian Restaurant Waldo’s Wings

Washington & Perk Provisions

West End Café

Whitaker Square Gourmet Pizza Yamas Mediterranean Street Food

Clemmons Restaurants

2520 Tavern Little Richard’s BBQ Mossy’s Eats, Ales & Spirits Pete’s Family Restaurant Pie Guys’ Pizza and More

Ronni’s

Kernersville Restaurants

Amalfi’s Italian Restaurant Big Burger Spot Cagney’s of Kernersville Cake & All Things Yummy

Captain Tom’s Seafood & Oyster Bar

Deli on Main Don Juan’s Mexican Restaurant KB Catering Ledo Pizza Low Price Mart & The Grill Mae’s Vintage Village Outwest Steakhouse

Plaza Restaurant

Prissy Polly’s BBQ Sixty Six Grill and Taphouse

Lewisville/Pfafftown Restaurants

Pig-N-Out Barbecue Southern Family Restaurant

Rural Hall Restaurants Coronet Seafood Mayflower Seafood Restaurant II Walkertown Restaurants

Little Richard’s BBQ

Restaurants in bold have been participating for 15 years or more.

Can’t eat out on September 8? Visit CrisisControl.org to donate.