Forest Holme Hospice - Summer Newsletter 2021

News Summer 2021

Charity Number 1038021

A breathtaking challenge Walking 100km in memory of Bob (page 8)

Dear Friends

Chief Executive, Anne Currie

Welcome to our Summer newsletter.

As I write this, the sun is shining on one of the warmest days of the year, there is the constant whizz of traffic from the road beside me with people heading out to make the most of the beautiful weather and England have just kicked off their first game in the Euros. Life seems to be buzzing all around us.

remembered the work of Forest Holme Hospice in their wills.

Therefore, we try to plan as many fundraising events and initiatives to ensure that we have a consistent level of income throughout the year to meet the costs of the many areas of work we support in the hospice.

It will come as no surprise to you that the last year has had a considerable effect on our ability to fundraise, but we have been very fortunate in monies we have received through legacies this year, which has meant that we can continue to provide this lifeenhancing support, and even I’m not entirely sure how to increase some areas of nursing summarise the last few months and counselling, to meet the but to say it very much remains growing need within our an ebb and flow situation. In the community. To everyone who took words of my countryman Robert the time to plan leaving a gift in Burns in the poem ‘To a Mouse’ he their will to Forest Holme, we said, “The best laid schemes o’ thank you. Their thoughtful mice an’ men. Gang aft a-gley”. Or, planning has made it easier for us the best laid plans of mice and to carry on during an incredibly men can still go wrong. It feels a difficult time. little like that at times; you can try to plan as best you can, but it The past year has probably helped doesn’t always turn out that way. focus our minds on what really Sometimes, you just need to go matters most to us. The little with the flow. things, which often make the As a Charity one thing we can never really plan for, or depend upon, is income we receive from people who have kindly 2

greatest impact on our health and wellbeing, that often get taken for granted are overlooked in our rush to live life on a daily basis.

Contents A legacy of the impact of the last year has been the commitment and determination shown by many people from lots of health and social care organisations across Dorset to work across organsiational boundaries to make sure we all do what matters for individuals and families at the end of life.

But we can’t do this alone, so could we please possibly ask you all to take five minutes to complete this online survey via www.surveymonkey.co.uk/r/ ZQM9MHQ and share your thoughts and experiences of what matters to you. Thank you for taking the time to help us get it right.

As a team we are continually bowled over by the commitment, passion and creativity of Forest Holme’s community to show they care. Your kindness is second to none and we are incredibly fortunate with the support we receive. You may never meet the people you are directly supporting at Forest Holme, but please remember that your acts of kindness matter greatly to those in our care - both now and in the future.

As ever, thank you for the real difference you make to Forest Holme’s patients, their families, staff and your local community.

With very best wishes,

2. Welcome 3. Welcome / Contents 4. How Counselling Helped Heal Me

6. Yellow Ribbon Appeal 8. Challenge Thank You 13. Fundraising Thank You 16. Forest Holme Arts Trail 17. New Website

18. Hospice News 20. Meet The MND Practitioner 22. Volunteer’s Week 24. Virtual London Marathon 25. Dance Through The Decades 26. Get Fit For Forest Holme 27. Mystery Boxes / Mailing List 28. Leaving A Legacy To Charity 30. Recycling 31. Room To Reward

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How Counselling Helped Heal Me Seventeen days later I had a seven hour operation, was on a ventilator for 23 hours and kept asleep for nearly a day. I was in a Critical Care ward for two nights and then gynae surgical ward for eight nights.

Allowed home on July 2nd, the 37 stainless steel staples down my center scar made me feel like a broken rag doll. My boyfriend dumped me the day after I came out of hospital, saying he needed to look after his own well-being! I suffered alone during six 21-day cycles of chemotherapy and also had 15 days of radiotherapy. I had support from three amazing friends and lovely neighbours.

Tree of Remembrance

Hello, I am Julie Drake, 62-year-old mother and grandmother. I have been fit and healthy all my life until Cancer reared its ugly head in the form of advanced Ovarian Cancer, diagnosed on June 5th 2020.

The only symptom I had was serious constipation (almost ten days), extreme bloating (never had that before) and loss of appetite, because it felt that if I tried to swallow food it had nowhere to go! I had always led an active life, walking, cycling, swimming, horse-riding and skiing.

I am also a pilot and fly a mini microlight for goodness sake, I am never ill. So, when I was diagnosed, initially with advanced Stage 3c Ovarian Cancer which had spread, I was immediately in shock, denial, anger. I swore a lot, I cried a lot, I was terrified that I might die.

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On December 14th my Consultant gave me the ALL CLEAR OF CANCER good news.

In the complete hysterectory and debulking operation they also took my spleen, which means I have zero immunity, so I was told I had to have several immunisations and would have to be on antibiotics every day for life.

I had the flu jab and have had both Covid jabs early because I was classified as in the highly vulnerable at risk category.

Since then I have focused on eating well and staying healthy, concentrating on improving gut health. I took myself off the ‘daily for

by Julie Drake life’ antibiotics because I believed that was wiping out my gut bacteria and I told my doctor I had done so and my reasons why. She agreed with my decision and said current thinking is only to be on antibiotics for 2yrs - I had done only ten months but its my body and my life and I had her blessing.

During my chemo treatment I was offered counselling sessions. I had never had counselling before and I thought “why not, after all I had the time didn’t I”. It was the best decision ever. Kathy my Counsellor was wonderful, she helped me discover how I got here, seeing the past and understanding myself and others around me. MacMillan then offered me Life-Coaching and it was the perfect next step to see what I wanted for my life. Nobody wants cancer but this journey has cleared away the dross and helped me let the past go and find the vision of my future. Don’t be fooled, counselling is not pain free, there has been a lot of tears and heart searching but knowing what I know now I wouldn’t hesitate to accept it.

surround yourself with positivity and good people, let the bad ones go as they will only drag you down. To survive cancer and move on, I found that appreciating the little things in life and being kind to yourself, lots of laughter (at yourself often), accepting all help that is offered because you are giving them the gift of giving and yourself the graciousness of accepting, lots of sleep and gentle exercise too.

One aspect that I found really hard was the emotional hurt of body image, apart from the 12 inch vertical scar and 37 stainless steel staples, at one stage all I had left was my eyelashes. When I looked at my reflection I just cried and thought “who is going to love me now?”. But the thing to hold on to is that old saying of “It will pass, it does get better” and it really does. Our poor bodies take a real battering but hair does grow back, smiles return, life turns a corner and here we are getting on with life again.

I have met a new man, my soul mate and we are very happy.

Cancer changes us in so many ways, I am not the same person any more. Forest Holme counselling is a wonderful service and I can’t praise them enough.

I don’t take things for granted, I am kinder and generous. I realise now that money is not important, people are important. You have to only

Forest Holme Hospice Charity funds the Palliative and General Counsellor at the hospice.

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The Big Brunch

Thank you.

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Challenge Thank You Front cover star Naomi Charlton (left), along with Katie Wareham, Hannah Syrett and Kate Locke, recently completed the 100km Jurassic Coast Challenge in memory of Bob Milne (Naomi's dad) and collectively raised over £3,800 for the hospice.

Becky Millhouse and her best friend Lauren Mackenzie (right), managed to dodge the recent terrible weather and complete a tandem skydive at 13,000ft and raised £2,420 for Forest Holme.

Becky took on the challenge in memory of her Mum, who spent her last ten days at the hospice in 2018, while Lauren did it in memory of her Auntie Chris, who sadly passed away at Forest Holme in 2018.

69-year-old Rowan Sutherland (right) from Swanage completed a 4 mile walk along the Purbeck hills to Corfe Castle and raised £3,814 for Forest Holme despite having debilitating Multiple Myeloma stage 3 cancer.

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Rowan, said, "I had tremendous support from family and friends. I am extremely lucky to be able to fight back and get an acceptable life, things will never be as it was but there is so much I can do and look forward to the challenges ahead.”

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Challenge Thank You Congratulations to Melissa Girling (below), who is the hospice’s Clinical Psychologist and Counselling Team Lead, who took on the Get Fit For Forest Holme challenge by running a halfmarathon and raised £700 for the charity.

Congratulations to Helena Ostler (above), a nurse at Forest Holme, and her friend Alice, who took on our Get Fit For Forest Holme challenge and walked 28 miles in a single day raising £470 for the hospice.

The Mavericks (below) virtually walked from Arco in West Drayton to Arco's National Distribution Centre - a total of 212 miles - throughout May and have raised £491 for Forest Holme so far.

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Challenge Thank You

Jenny Bennett (above) completed her Get Fit For Forest Holme challenge by completing each part of a triathlon and raised £810.

11-year-old Jamie Groves (below) completed his Get Fit For Forest Holme challenge by walking two miles everyday in memory of his dad and raised £4,615 for the hospice. (also see page 18)

Shaun Amor (above) raised nearly £2,300 by riding his bike every day during February in memory of his Dad, who passed away at Forest Holme two years ago.

Keith Male (left) challenged himself to do 10,000 steps per day during March and raised £500 in memory of his good friend David Veal.

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Challenge Thank You

Adam Scholey (above, centre) took on the Captain Tom 100 challenge by attempting to save 100 penalty kicks on a very soggy Sunday afternoon and managed to raise just over £527 for Forest Holme.

Annie Parker (left, middle), decided to celebrate her 18th birthday while in lockdown by running a half-marathon from The Willett Arms pub in Wimborne to Alum Chine and raised £105.

Young Alfred and Ted (below) took part in a Camp Out and raised money for Forest Holme in memory of their Grandad, Frank.

Ben Camfield (right), successfully completed the 100km Jurassic Coast Challenge and has so far raised £677 for the hospice.

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Challenge Thank You Michelle Bartlett (left) signed-up to Get Fit For Forest Holme by taking on the challenge of walking a continuous 100km along the Jurassic Coast in May, raising nearly £1,743 for the hospice.

Maria Thomas-Luker (right) raised £344 by completing both the 26.2 mile London Summer Walk and the 56km London to Brighton. Maria is a regular hospice fundraiser through challenge events and has already got plans to take part in the 53km Isle of Wight challenge in July, as well as the Thames Path Challenge and Chiltern 50km in September.

And also...

Other challenge heroes that deserve a mention include...

Naomi Charlton Lucy Ergis Mark Watson Michelle Dougan Kristina Foot Kayleigh Williams Janette Morton

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Fundraising Thank You COTY Inc. - who are one of the world’s largest beauty companies generously made a donation of £5,000 to the hospice raised from the proceeds of their online staff shop while their factories were shut during lockdown.

Bella Rose beauty in Poole (right) kindly organised a Christmas raffle, which raised £129 for Forest Holme but were only able to access the money when the salon re-opened again after lockdown.

The Wonderful Studland Ladies (left) raised nearly £4,000 through a pop-up takeaway on Studland Village Green during April.

Donna, the Tesco Kinson in the Community Champion (right), delivered a cheque for £695 raised through their in-store bookstall.

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Fundraising Thank You Community Champion Rona (left) from Asda in Poole very kindly donated a number of items including toiletries, candles and chocolates for our next round of Mystery Boxes in August.

Thank you to everyone that joined us for our Easter Virtual Bingo Night and helped raise £1,800.

Also a special mention to Jacqui Broughton and her daughter Tish, who made and donated an amazing Chocolate Smash and Easter Simnel Cake (left) as a bingo prizes.

Michelle Belcher at Hamworthy Junction Post Office raised £720 by organising a Easter Hamper Raffle for Forest Holme with Julie, Lyn and Sally (right) being the lucky winners.

Wessex Marine very kindly donated £1,000 to Forest Holme in response to the hospice receiving three nominations in the recent Bournemouth Daily Echo ‘Dorset Hero Awards’. (see page 18) 14

Fundraising Thank You Dave Blunden, Dual Store Manager of Arco in Poole and Hedge End, organised a Beach Party Beach Wear At Work Day and raised £190 for the hospice.

The event was to support The Mavericks Acro team, who were virtually walking 212 miles from Arco West Drayton to Arco's National Distribution Centre throughout May. (see page 9) Elle Bakes (left) raised £75 for Forest Holme with the proceeds of selling themed Treat Boxes during the month of May.

The Canford Cliffs Land Society kindly donated £2,500 to support the work of the hospice.

Upton Plant Hire (above) donated £1,000 to the hospice in memory of Ceri Stephenson.

During lockdown Mr Bill Hutchings (left) kindly made and sold bird tables and bird boxes and so far raised over £350.

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Chief Executive, Anne Currie

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Hospice News Forest Holme Hospice and The Macmillan Unit, who are both part of University Hospitals Dorset, joined forces for Dying Matters Awareness Week to support the provision of excellent end of life care within the hospitals to ensure that it is also the right place for people to die.

Congratulations to young fundraiser Jamie Groves (Young Hero) and our very own Simone Burne and the hospice admin team (Healthcare Support), who both won top accolades for Forest Holme Hospice at the recent Bournemouth Daily Echo ‘Dorset Hero Awards’.

Forest Holme took the opportunity to celebrate Pride Month in June and reaffirm the hospice’s commitment to maintaining an inclusive culture, where everyone feels welcomed, cared for and safe to be themselves.

Supporter Maria Morton kindly dropped in two gorgeous handmade bears recently - one to the charity team as a lucky mascot and the other one to support our annual Tie a Yellow Ribbon campaign.

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Hospice News Primark in Poole gave Forest Holme permission to raise awareness of the hospice in one of their windows, while The Dolphin Shopping Centre allowed the charity to put a contactless machine outside the store for donations.

Forest Holme was delighted to receive £5,445 in funding from Health Education England to help support staff wellbeing through coaching from Jane Young.

Thank you to James Whatley from the Llewellin Lodge 7907 who delivered cream teas to the staff at Forest Holme. The Lodge organised a cream tea event with the proceeds coming to the charity, while several members of the Lodge purchased cream teas to be delivered to the nurses as a little treat and thanking them for all their hard work.

It was a lovely surprise to see our Forest Holme Hospice counselling service get a mention on ITV's This Morning. Bob McLaren appeared in a feature about meeting up with an old flame from 1974 following the death of his second wife Jo. Before her death they both attended counselling sessions at the hospice - separately and together - which helped Bob move forward with Jo's encouragement.

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Meet The MND Practitioner Annemieke, who joined Forest Holme as a Motor Neurone Disease (MND) Advanced Healthcare Practitioner Co-Ordinator earlier this year, explains more about MND and how her new charity-funded role supports local people - and their families - with the disease from diagnosis onwards.

Can you explain what motor neurone disease is?

You have nerves in your brain and spinal cord that control how your muscles work. These are called motor neurones. MND is a disease that affects the motor neurones. With MND, motor neurones gradually stop telling your muscles how to move. When muscles no longer move, they become weak, which can also lead to stiffness and loss of muscle mass (wasting). MND is a life-shortening illness that can affect how you walk, talk, eat, drink and breathe. This is usually different for each individual. You may not get all of the symptoms and there is no set order in which they happen.

The disease will progress, which means your symptoms will get worse over time. For some people this can be rapid, for others it is slower.

There is currently no cure for MND, but your doctors and other health and social care professionals can help you to manage symptoms and remain independent for as long as possible.

Tell us about your role as MND Advanced Healthcare Practioner Co-ordinator and how does it impact patient care?

This role is to support people with MND and their families from diagnosis onwards. It includes provision of information, symptom control advice and psychological support and co-ordination of the other services a person with MND may need. They are the main point of 20

Meet The MND Practitioner contact for people with MND and their families. Mostly people are supported in their own homes but can also be supported if admitted to a care home, hospital or Forest Holme. The role also includes attending bi-monthly multi-disciplinary clinics with Dr Hiller (neurologist) and Dr Lee (palliative care consultant), and organising the bi-monthly multidisciplinary meetings where all professionals involved in supporting people with MND come together to ensure joined up care. The role also includes trying to improve the services people receive, and providing education to those who regularly care for people with MND e.g. care agencies, nursing homes

This is a brand new role - why is it now necessary to have a dedicated MND practitioner?

The existing teams already provide good care and support for people with MND but a lot of this has been based on good will and people going the extra mile. It has been clear for many years that a role like this was needed – in Bournemouth and Dorchester they have had people in this role for 4-5 years.

What did you do before you came to Forest Holme?

I qualified as a nurse in 1995 and started my career in cancer care/ palliative care, mostly at the Macmillan Unit in Christchurch. In 2008 I went to work as the regional adviser for the MND Association, and in 2013 I took up a role as neurology research nurse at Poole Hospital.

Finally, how are you finding working at Forest Holme and how has the pandemic affected your work?

The team at Forest Holme have been so welcoming, friendly and helpful, I feel like I have been part of the team for ages! When I first started the role I was unable to visit patients due to my own risk factors for Covid-19, but since having the vaccines, I have been seeing people at home and the main effect of the pandemic is all the PPE we have to wear, which I’m sure will be worse when (and if!) the warm weather finally arrives. It has obviously also had effects on people living with and affected by MND – when you are facing a shortened and limited life, they have been very frustrated not to be able to spend time with family and friends, do things they enjoy, or travel abroad.

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Volunteers’ Week Fundraising Thank You

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Thank You to all our amazing volunteers

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Mystery Boxes We are pleased to announce that our popular Mystery Boxes will be returning in August.

If you are able to donate any unwanted gifts, including wine or fizz, boxes of chocolates, bath or shower sets, candles, gift sets and vouchers, please contact us via 01202 670644 or email: fundraising@forestholmehospice.org.uk

Mailing List You are receiving this newsletter because of your support of Forest Holme Hospice Charity.

Your details will not be shared with, or sold to, any third parties.

If you haven’t already completed a contact preference form, please fill-out the form below and return to us.

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Leaving A Legacy To Charity Five Things To Consider When Leaving A Legacy To Charity Leaving a legacy to charity has never been more important but – like so many other aspects of making a will – it pays to plan ahead where possible.

This is especially true in the pandemic. Some families built up savings during lockdown; not a bad problem to have, you might think. But this extra money can have an impact on your Inheritance Tax (IHT) liabilities…

1. Has Your Estate Grown Under Lockdown?

As I wrote in a previous article, if you donate 10% (or more) of your net estate to charity, the IHT liability on what remains drops from 40% to 36%.

But here’s the issue: while the bequest is fixed, the value of your estate may have grown during lockdown because you had fewer opportunities to spend money. So it pays to review your will to ensure your charity bequests still represent at least 10% of your estate. You may need to increase them to ensure they will still trigger the IHT reduction.

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2. Potentially Exempt Transfer (PET) Time Limits Don’t Apply To Charity Bequests Using Potentially Exempt Transfers, you can make gifts to people at any time: those gifts will be free of IHT (usually 40%) if you survive another seven years.

But gifts to charities are exempt from this seven-year rule. No IHT is due – even if, sadly, you do not survive seven years after making the gift.

3. Dying Without A Will – The Intestacy Rules If you die without a will, the Intestacy Rules will govern what happens to your estate. They set out which surviving relatives can legally benefit from the estate (and by how much).

So if you wish to leave a bequest to charity – even a small amount – you must have a will in place to ensure your final wishes are carried out.

By Coles Miller 4. How To Stop Your Charity Bequest Being Contested

By supporting small local charities, you can see the real difference your help can make.

Unfortunately, more wills are being Your donation or bequest wouldn’t disputed these days. Some of these just disappear into a big national cases are brought by large fund – where it could so easily get charities (with high running costs). swallowed up by administration So if you want to ensure your costs or expensive TV advertising. money goes to the small local Your kindness would bring muchcharity of your choice, it pays to: needed help and comfort to local Write a legal note to accompany people when they most need it. your will. This helps to make your wishes clear. It also explains your reasoning discreetly; a will is a public document but the note is not.

Make small regular donations to your chosen charity. This establishes a pattern that can be taken into account by a court should your will be disputed.

5. Small Charities Need Your Help More Than Ever Covid-19 lockdown regulations have forced many charities to cancel or postpone essential fundraising events. So this year, bequests are more important than ever.

Small charities like Forest Holme don’t have huge cash reserves like their larger counterparts. They serve their local communities – not the whole country – so they rely on donations and bequests from smaller groups of supporters.

Stuart Bradford Forest Holme Hospice Charity Trustee Partner and Head of the Probate Department at Coles Miller Solicitors LLP

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Room to Reward is a unique charity created to give something back to those volunteers who do so much, for so many.

All over the U.K., there are hundreds of thousands of people making a difference where it’s needed most, people whose words, deeds and actions make the world a better place.

Room to Reward enables registered charities to give something back to these inspirational individuals with a wellearned break at no cost to themselves.

Room to Reward partners with hotels across the U.K who donate their anticipated unsold rooms to the scheme.

Charities are then invited to nominate their Hidden Heroes for a 1-2 night, bed and breakfast, complimentary break to enjoy with a friend/loved one.

Hotels throughout the country – as well as properties in Europe – have joined the initiative, helping to say ‘thank you’ to society’s Hidden Heroes and celebrating the difference they make.

Find out more at www.roomtoreward.org

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Charity Number 1038021

Contact Us If you would like more information about the care the hospice provides or how to fundraise for us, we would love to hear from you.

Forest Holme Hospice 5 Seldown Road, Poole, Dorset, BH15 1TS T: 01202 670644 (Charity) T: 0300 019 8147 (Hospice) E: fundraising@forestholmehospice.org.uk

www.forestholmehospice.org.uk Forestholme

@ForestHolme

@forestholmehospice

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