Folio Weekly 10/29/14 by Folio Weekly

FREE! I OCTOBER 29-NOVEMBER 4, 2014 I folioweekly.com

NORTHEAST FLORIDA’S INDEPENDENT VOICE SINCE 1987

THEY’RE

MASKS!

... and YOU Can

WEAR THEM! THEY’R

TERRIF E YING! ot t Rick Sc

Ch arli e

Cris t

THEY’RE ! DEOUS

T he ret urn of...

Page 10

AIN’T NO PARTY LIKE A THIRD PARTY – PAGE 6

YES ON 2 – PAGE 3

SPEND THE NIGHT IN THIS STELLAR MOTEL – PAGE 18 l l l l l l

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Fall into a Feast of the Senses at Lillie’s! FREE LIVE MUSIC

Oct. 31 - The New Moon Ramblers Nov. 1 - Intuit Nov. 7 - Derryck Lawrence Nov. 8 - Ernie Lombardi & the Session Nov. 14 - TBA Nov. 15 Jarell Harris Nov. 21 Weatherman

200 First Street Neptune Beach Visit lilliescoffeebar.com

Like us on

for specials.

●

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

904.249.2922

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

CLYBOURNE PARK at Limelight Theatre in St. Augustine

November 7 – November 30, 2014 Preview: Nov. 6 • Terrific Tuesday: Nov. 11 Produced in conjunction with Lift Up Lincolnville, Clybourne Park (2010) is a play by Bruce Norris written in response to Lorraine Hansberry’s play, A Raisin in the Sun. It portrays fictional events set before and after the Hansberry play and is loosely based on historical events that took place in the city of Chicago.

11 Old Mission Ave., uptown St. Augustine limelight-theatre.org / 904-825-1164

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

CONTENTS //

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 • VOLUME 28 • NUMBER 31

YES ON 2

18 MAIL THE JAG-OFF NEWS COVER STORY

5 6 6 10

OUR PICKS MUSIC THE KNIFE MOVIES

16 18 24 25

MAGIC LANTERNS ARTS BITE-SIZED ASTROLOGY

27 29 35 37

I SAW U WEIRD CROSSWORD CLASSIFIEDS

37 38 38 39

Cover Illustration by Chris Hsu.

PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor

staylor@folioweekly.com / 904.260.9770 ext. 111

EDITORIAL

EDITOR • Jeffrey C. Billman jbillman@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 SENIOR EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 A&E EDITOR • Daniel A. Brown dbrown@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 WRITERS-AT-LARGE Susan Cooper Eastman seastman@folioweekly.com Derek Kinner dkinner@folioweekly.com CARTOONIST • Tom Tomorrow CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, Daniel A. Brown, John E. Citrone, Julie Delegal, AG Gancarski, Nicholas Garnett, Claire Goforth, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, MaryAnn Johanson, Amanda Long, Heather Lovejoy, Pat McLeod, Nick McGregor, Cameron Meier, Jeff Meyers, Kara Pound, Merl Reagle, Scott Renshaw, Carley Robinson, Chuck Shepherd, Melody Taylor and Abigail Wright

EDITOR’S NOTE

VIDEOGRAPHER • Doug Lewis

ADVERTISING

DESIGN

PUBLISHER Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / ext. 111

ART DIRECTOR • Shan Stumpf sstumpf@folioweekly.com / ext. 116 SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER • Dana Fasano dfasano@folioweekly.com / ext. 117 GRAPHIC DESIGNER • Allison Walsh awalsh@folioweekly.com / ext. 117 PHOTOGRAPHER • Dennis Ho dho@folioweekly.com / ext. 122 DESIGN INTERN • Tess Guidi design@folioweekly.com / ext. 117

BUSINESS & ADMINISTRATION

SENIOR ACCOUNT MANAGER CJ Allen callen@folioweekly.com / ext. 120 • Beaches, Ponte Vedra Beach, Amelia Island ACCOUNT MANAGER Lee Ann Thornton lthornton@folioweekly.com ext. 127 • Mandarin, Orange Park ACCOUNT MANAGER / SPECIAL EVENTS MANAGER Ro Espinosa respinosa@folioweekly.com ext. 129 • Southside, Avondale, Arlington

BUSINESS MANAGER • Cherish Kelly fpiadmin@folioweekly.com / ext. 119 VICE PRESIDENT • T. Farrar Martin fmartin@folioweekly.com

MOBILE APP ADVERTISING ACCOUNT MANAGER Kathrin Lancelle klancelle@folioweekly.com ext. 124 • Downtown, Riverside, Northside, San Marco

DISTRIBUTION

MEDIA HOUSE ACCOUNT MANAGER Olivia Gentilini ogentilini@folioweekly.com ext. 125 • Intracoastal West, St. Augustine

Bobby Pendexter / cosmicdistributions@gmail.com

Folio Weekly is published every Wednesday throughout Northeast Florida. It contains opinions of contributing writers that are not necessarily the opinion of this publication. Folio Weekly welcomes both editorial and photographic contributions. Calendar information must be received two weeks in advance of event date. Copyright © Folio Publishing, Inc. 2014. All rights reserved. Advertising rates and information are available on request. An advertiser purchases right of publication only. One free issue copy per person. Additional copies and back issues are $1 each at the office or $4 by U.S. mail, based on availability. First Class mail subscriptions are $48 for 13 weeks, $96 for 26 weeks and $189 for 52 weeks. Please recycle Folio Weekly. Folio Weekly is printed on recycled paper using soy-based inks. 27,000 press run. Audited weekly readership 105,315.

GET SOCIALIZED FOLIOWEEKLY.COM

FOLIO WEEKLY STORE folioweeklystore.com

BITE CLUB

facebook.com/folioweeklybiteclub

Download Layar and scan when you see the Layar symbol to discover interactive content.

This publication offers you great digital experiences using the Layar App.

thefolioweekly

@folioweekly

Mobile App

For the best in Live Music, Arts, Sports, Food and Nightlife, download the DOJAX Mobile App by texting “Folio” to 77948

9456 Philips Highway, Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256 Phone: 904.260.9770 • Fax: 904.260.9773

Not so long ago, I was confidently, arrogantly perhaps, telling anyone who would listen that yes, of course the pro-medical marijuana Amendment 2 would pass, easily at that. Just look at the polling, I would say — 65, 70, even 80 percent approval, consistently above the 60-percent threshold to be enshrined in the Florida Constitution. Look at the national trends, the overarching movement toward decriminalization and a somewhat saner drug policy. Look at the common sense of it: Pot is no more dangerous than the liquor you can find at stores all over town, and is a far sight safer than many of the painkillers your doctor can legally prescribe. Why shouldn’t it be legally available, especially under a doctor’s supervision? There’s simply no argument that holds up to logical scrutiny. Of course Amendment 2 was going to pass. Perhaps I spoke too soon. The pro-2 poll numbers have dipped below 60 percent, some inching closer to 50 percent, buried in a well-financed avalanche of scaremongering and hyperbole and out-and-out bullshit from our state’s worryworts and prudes and professional scolds and moral betters and beneficiaries of a robust police state, all of whom just know that medical marijuana will lead ipso facto to the sky falling and all of our teenagers becoming dope fiends and raping each other (seriously, a No on 2 ad asked: “Will the new face of ‘date rape’ look like a [marijuana] cookie?”) and, as Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd warned earlier this year, stoned losers throwing their babies off walls. (Actual, not-made-up-at-all quote: “I see the guy that’s up all night with a baby that’s screaming, so he smokes him a blunt and a half and he thinks that’ll help and ends up bouncing the baby off the walls.”) It’s worth taking a moment to look at some of the folks behind these ads. Start with Sheldon Adelson, the Las Vegas casino magnate and GOP funder who shelled out $4 million to Drug Free Florida — a state 2,000 miles away from his home turf — while he just so happens to be lobbying our state’s anti-pot lawmakers to expand casino gambling (a vice that actually has deleterious societal impacts, by the way). Then go to Mel Sembler, the co-founder of Drug Free Florida, which is campaigning against Amendment 2. Before that Sembler founded a “tough love” drug rehab program for kids called Straight Inc., which was shut down after accusations of physical and sexual abuse and false imprisonment and plagued by lawsuits. Then consider Carlton Turner, Ronald Reagan’s drug czar, the progenitor of the Just Say No campaign and now Drug Free Florida’s chairman, who back in 1986 claimed that “Marijuana leads to homosexuality,” and more recently said that pot has “more cancercausing compounds than cigarettes.” You shouldn’t vote for Amendment 2 because its chief opponents comprise a rogue’s gallery of anachronistic drug warriors, or because they’re espousing asinine arguments that don’t deserve to win. You should vote for Amendment 2 because it’s the right thing to do, because it will help people who need help, because we’ve empowered the state to prosecute and imprison people for nonviolent drug offenses for far too long, and because, yes, this is a step toward decriminalization and legalization, and that’s OK. Jeffrey C. Billman twitter/jeffreybillman jbillman@folioweekly.com OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 3

4 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

MAIL Vote for Rick Scott

The recession started in late 2007 and continued for Florida (at least in terms of jobs) for Charlie Crist’s entire term. So was Charlie doing the things that Florida needed to create jobs? The answer to the question is no. He spent more time in 2008 positioning himself to be John McCain’s running mate than he did working to solve the state’s economic problems [Editor’s Note, “I Can’t Believe I Voted for Charlie Crist,” Jeffrey C. Billman, Oct. 22]. Then let’s look at 2009 and 2010. Rather than work for Florida, Crist put his energy toward running for the Senate. What happened in the time from January 2007, when Charlie took office, until December 2010, which was his last full month in office? In January 2007 the number of people employed in Florida was 8,868,374, with an unemployment rate of 3.5 percent. In December 2010 (Crist’s last full month in office) the number of people employed was 8,204,102, and the unemployment rate was 11.2 percent. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics this was a loss of 664,272 jobs. This is during a time that the state’s population continued to grow. After January 2011 this began to change. In January 2011 (when Scott was sworn in) there were 8,226,371 Floridians in the workforce, with an unemployment rate of 10.9 percent. In July 2014 there were 9,014,047 employed Floridians, with an unemployment rate of 6.2 percent. This would be equal to a creation of 787,676 jobs in Scott’s first 43 months in office. Based on the BLS numbers he met his goal of creating 700,000 jobs in seven years within three-and-a-half years. Locally, there is one particular issue of interest involving Scott; Jacksonville was a candidate for a major plant to be built for General Electric. It was decided that the plant would be built in North Carolina. The governor found out about the plant going to another state, contacted GE officials and then jumped on his plane and flew out to meet them. After Scott’s negotiations with top company officials Jacksonville was chosen as the location for the plant. Scott is a proven job creator, but what about all the other aspects of state government? At the time Scott was sworn in, he inherited a $3.6 billion deficit from Crist. He had to decrease this deficit in some way. The law requires that Florida balance its budget. Because of the recession raising taxes was not an option. Scott and the legislature made the tough decisions that Crist had ignored while campaigning first for vice president and then for senator. I hope that anyone considering Crist will remember that he abdicated the proper execution of his duties as governor while we were in the midst of crisis. Do you really want to bring someone back who failed at the job the first time? In the four years since Scott took over, the state has moved from a deficit to a major surplus. This is major accomplishment considering the shape the state was in. If Scott has continued Crist’s policy of raising taxes to meet the deficit rather than cutting costs, the economic recovery would have been a lot smaller and the deficit would have become permanent. It must be remembered that funding for education has gone up each year since 2011 and is now back at record levels. If we had had four more years of a governor who ignored the creation of jobs in Florida, then we would not

have this money for education and the state surplus would still be a deficit. To make certain that all of us have a brighter future, vote for Rick Scott. Bruce A. Fouraker

Vote for Nancy Shaver

As a former [St. Augustine] mayor and commissioner this is the first year since I left office six years ago that I’ve endorsed city candidates, because it’s the first year there’s been real opportunity for change and progress. For mayor, Nancy Shaver. Nancy promises a creative, fresh look at our city’s needs and priorities, and full community engagement in

finding solutions. The last time a newcomer broke through the good-old-boy system, a decade ago, the results included the creation of a neighborhood associations program, construction of a worldclass visitor parking facility and welcome center, and putting Entry Corridor Guidelines into the city code. The current mayor has controlled the city’s 450th commemoration at the expense of the community [Cover Story, “The Forever King,” Susan Cooper Eastman, Aug. 20]. Joe Boles’ contrasting detachment from the community is glaring, as is his stumbling efforts to discredit his opponent. For commission seat 5, incumbent Nancy Sikes-Kline. Nancy has been the only consistently proactive commissioner, using her position on the North Florida Transportation Organization to bring needed traffic studies and street-enhancement projects to our city, and speaking for our archaeology and history. For commission seat 4, John Valdes. With service on city boards for a quarter of a century and contributed time, effort and funding to such projects as the Flagler fountains restoration and War Memorial move, John is best equipped to address needed zoning code modifications. George Gardner, via folioweekly.com If you would like to respond to something that appeared in the pages of Folio Weekly, please send an email with your address and phone number (for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com.

THE BEST OF

COASTAL

LIVING

paradisekeysouthbeach.com | 904.222.8686 3611 Paradise Way | Jacksonville Beach, FL Located at the corner of South Beach Parkway and Jacksonville Drive QUEST R E A L E STAT S TAT TATE E, LLC

Location of the 2013

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

NEWS

The JAG-OFF

THREE IS THE LONELIEST NUMBER

IN GUS WE BUST?

WEEK 8, JAGS VS. DOLPHINS

Another home game for the Jaguars, another chance for Blake Bortles to make the leap. This game was the biggest start in his young career. Why? Because the Dolphins are arguably the Jags’ biggest rivals. And Dolphins QB Ryan Tannehill, in many ways, is an analog for Bortles: a young, up-and-down quarterback who can run if he needs to (both were top-five QB rushers coming in). The jury was out on both coming into Sunday’s clash. It still is afterward. Tannehill was yet another QB who floundered in the face of an initially opportunistic Jags D (just 56 yards allowed in the first half). And Bortles? A dumpster fire. Yes, he threw two long TD passes. Both, however, went to Dolphins defenders. Some missed opportunities weren’t on Bortles, such as the bomb Allen Robinson dropped on the first drive. For every one of those, though, there were things like the two pick-sixes — Bortles’ 11th and 12th interceptions of the year — and the fumble in the second quarter. At times, especially on third down, he looked Gabbertesque. As the game progressed, Gus Bradley looked less and less like an NFL coach. More Tom Arnold than Tom Landry, Gus’ team was once again outmatched in the second half. What was a winnable game at intermission was over long before the third quarter ended. Tannehill sharpened up as the fourth quarter commenced, one-liners and fart wafts filled the press box, and a “Let’s Go Dolphins” chant pervaded the cleaner air outside it. On a day when the Pillsbury Doughboy did pelvic thrusts in the end zone and a wayward passenger pigeon was closer to the ball than anyone in the Jags secondary, it’s tempting to play for comedy and ignore serious matters, like Luke Joeckel going down with a concussion or Blake Bortles calling himself a “lab rat” who is “killing us” during his postgame media session. The real question, though, is Gus Bradley’s job security, which is looking more and more like an open question (if discussion in the press conference room as the clock ran down was any indication). During yet another tightly managed press conference, I asked Bradley about his “job security” after another “challenging game” for which the coach will “take responsibility.” The one-word answer: “No,” he said, staring down, oddly pensive, as the presser wrapped. That said, Bradley might need to call Mike Mularkey’s realtor if the shit-storm continues. As the folks at KYN can tell you, Shad Khan is not averse to pulling the plug if the numbers are going south. And I’m not seeing where wins come from for this squad anytime soon. Parking at EverBank looks like it will be much easier this December games than it has been thus far. That’s a silver lining. A pissed-off Bengals team on the road playing for its season next week, though, is the immediate, non-negotiable reality. There are no easy answers for any questions at the season’s midpoint, with our home team a lowly 1-7. AG Gancarski twitter/aggancarski mail@folioweekly.com 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

hey’re not going to win. Deep down, most of them know that. They’re not delusional. They don’t have the money, or the endorsements, or the name recognition, or the major party support.

But winning’s not always the point for thirdparty candidates — those who put their names, money and reputations on the line to get their names on the ballot. They’re out there to bring to the fore ideas and issues that the big-name candidates aren’t willing to tackle, whether it’s economic reform or industrial hemp or term limits or, as is the case with one local State Senate candidate, installing tire rippers on Interstate on-ramps. “I’m spreading the seeds everywhere, planting the seeds and they will grow,” says Farid Khavari, a Miami businessman running as an independent for governor. “And that is what I’m doing. If I’m elected, so much better, because I can do it and train people and get the right people in place and do it fast. If not, at least I have planted seeds.” The media, understandably, tends to focus on the candidates likeliest to win. But the others — and in many races, from governor to attorney general to Congress to the state legislature, you have options beyond Democrat and Republican — have thrust themselves into the arena, and we think, if nothing else, they deserve a forum in which to make their voices heard. Below, we gave them that opportunity.

GOVERNOR

GLENN BURKETT PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: Rick Scott, Republican (incumbent); Charlie Crist, Democrat; Adrian Wyllie, Libertarian; Farid Khavari, no party affiliation

Glenn Burkett is a natural-health “innovator and educator” who runs Glenn Burkett Wellness and Fitness in Fort Myers. He has never held public office, though he has run before. In 2005, he ran for governor as a Republican, and in 2012, he challenged U.S. Sen. Bill Nelson in the Democratic primary. At the moment, Burkett has no web presence for his campaign — his website, glennburkett.com, redirects to his business site, gb1com.com — and he doesn’t appear to be doing much active campaigning. FARID KHAVARI PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: Rick Scott, Republican (incumbent); Charlie Crist, Democrat; Adrian Wyllie, Libertarian; Glenn Burkett, no party affiliation

Meet the third-party and unaffiliated candidates you’ll see on your ballot Nov. 4.

Perhaps the candidate with the most intriguing backstory is Farid Khavari, an IranianAmerican who has lived in the United States since 1977. When asked about his background, he tells the story of his father, who was executed in Iran in 1980. “My father was executed after the revolution,” Khavari says. “We are not Muslim, and they asked my father to denounce his religion. He would not do it, so they executed him. Then they went to my mother, and charged her for the bullet. They told her that if she would renounce her religion, she could keep her house. She would not. She walked out.” Like his parents, Khavari refuses to compromise his values for anyone else’s point of view — and he’s particularly vocal when it comes to expressing his opinions on the economy and social issues. On women’s rights? “I am especially disgusted when gray old men try to make laws to control women,” he states on his website. Marriage equality? “I believe that a person has the right to love whom they wish. I believe that people have the right to marry whom they wish. I believe that discrimination against any person or group is wrong, and completely against most sacred traditions of America.” Medical marijuana? He supports it, and he thinks Amendment 2 is just the beginning. But it’s really on the economy and the environment that Khavari has more to say: “I know I can fix the economy,” he says. “It is the easiest thing in the world to do, if you know how to do it. And I know I can do it. And that is the reason I am running. I know I can fix the economy and put an end to people’s suffering.” Khavari says that we need to stop thinking in terms of “supply-side” economics and think in terms of demand. He suggests that Florida focus on industries, such as solar power, where it could become a leader in job creation and manufacturing. He also talks about creating products that help “hurricane-proof ” houses, and other energy-saving endeavors that would help save people money, improve the environment and create what he calls “SuperJobs” — jobs that pay more than minimum wage. If Khavari is so sure his plan could improve the economy and the lives of the state’s residents, why doesn’t he join a party and try to work from within the system to make improvements? Because, like his father and his mother, he refuses to compromise. “With certain things, I do not agree,” he says. “The party dogmas — you have to be this way and

that way and so on. And they think they have to tax people. I do not like taxes. We have to create jobs, middle-class jobs in the private sector, to put people in a position where they can have good lives on their own.” He says he knows his candidacy is a long shot, but he thinks of it as a beginning: “Every reform starts with the first step,” he says. “If I say and you say, ‘Oh, this is a big problem, we are never going to get anywhere,’ then we never will.” ADRIAN WYLLIE PARTY: Libertarian OPPONENTS: Rick Scott, Republican (incumbent); Charlie Crist, Democrat; Farid Khavari, no party affiliation; Glenn Burkett, no party affiliation Of all of the third-party candidates running for governor this year, Wyllie is the one who’s receiving the most attention — and that is primarily because he recently sued (unsuccessfully) to be allowed to be part of the gubernatorial debates that were only open to Gov. Rick Scott and Charlie Crist. His campaign thinks that is ludicrous. “We have been building momentum through grass roots for the past year and a half,” says campaign manager Danielle Alexandre. “Being a third-party candidate, the media is always skeptical.” Until you reach a certain polling percentage, she says, the media (and debate organizers) tend to ignore third-party candidates; but you can’t gain in the polls — or even make the polls — without attention being lavished on you by the media. “It’s an uphill battle, and it’s a Catch-22,” she says, but Wyllie finally got a small break when Quinnipiac finally agreed to include him in a recent survey. “And he ended up polling at 9 percent, and everything snowballed from there.” Wyllie still has to fight for inclusion in anything, though — the major parties are generally invested in keeping third-party candidates out of the race because they tend to split the vote (see Nader, Ralph). Undecided voters, or voters who have qualms about their party’s anointed candidate, may gravitate toward a Libertarian or independent because they like the message they’re hearing — so, particularly in close races, third-party candidates can be seen as unwelcome competition, if not an actual threat. Wyllie, who was born and raised in Dunedin, has a seven-point economic plan for the state, which includes dramatically cutting the state budget, reducing regulation on various industries, and keeping the federal government out of

Florida’s economy. He is strong on gun rights, is in favor of choice in education, and would eliminate state marriage-licensing laws and leave it up to individuals and churches to determine how to handle the concept of marriage. As for social services, Alexandre says Wyllie believes in freeing up charities to be able to do more to get involved to help out in the community. Finally, she says, the most important thing the Wyllie campaign wants people to know: “Nobody owns your vote.” “We’ve been voting out of fear for many years now,” she says, “and we’ve been getting the same government every time. We have the current Republican governor against the former Republican governor, and people aren’t happy with the jobs either of them has done. But in this race, you do have a third option.”

ATTORNEY GENERAL

BILL WOHLSIFER PARTY: Libertarian OPPONENTS: Pam Bondi, Republican (incumbent); George Sheldon, Democrat

Prior to the Oct. 6 televised attorney general debate between current Attorney General Pam Bondi, former assistant Attorney General George Sheldon and Libertarian outlier Bill Wohlsifer, there wasn’t much information about this race’s third-party option. In fact, it’s been confirmed by someone close to one of those major-party campaigns that Bondi would not participate in a debate with Sheldon unless Wohlsifer were there to perhaps hog some of her main competitor’s limelight. Wohlsifer’s performance, while at times refreshingly honest in that regular-guy way, wasn’t as impressive as Bondi might have hoped. A down-theline Libertarian, Wohlsifer seemed out of touch with most of the softball thematic lines drawn by the moderators — pill mills, marriage equality, the Affordable Care Act. He, as third-party candidates often do, played the armchair quarterback without offering much in the way of ideas about how the office of attorney general could be better used. (Wohlsifer’s campaign did not return calls for this story.) But there’s a lot to like about Wohlsifer. He’s a believer in medical marijuana, of course. He also thinks that, if the state embraced industrial hemp, that money could be funneled into clean water efforts. He’s anti-fracking, pretty strong on rights restoration, typically Libertarian-likable on LGBT issues and likes to throw the term “civil liberties” around when speaking about police. Things get a little hazier on gun rights (he thinks the open-carry laws in the state are too strict), labor unions (he’s a “strong advocate for arbitration and mediation efforts,” so, not so much for unions), and abortion (no mention of it on his website).

U.S. CONGRESS, DISTRICT 4 GARY KONIZ PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: Ander Crenshaw, Republican (incumbent); Deborah Katz-Pueschel, write-in candidate; Paula Moser-Bartlett, no party affiliation

In the political grandstand of the moment, where candidates pander to deep-seated distrust by spouting anti-government, free market freefor-all as the key to the future, writer and social reform advocate Gary Koniz still believes that government is a beacon. His chances of winning are below zilch, and his 10-point plan for rescuing the United States is bogglingly broad. But his

vision upends the current groupthink and is, if nothing else, ambitious. At the heart of his campaign, beyond the need to renegotiate a settlement with Native Americans and institute decency laws and militarize the war on drugs, Koniz says he’s about the American worker. The current consumer economy has so undervalued the workforce that the average worker doesn’t earn enough to meet the basic cost of living, he says. He would fix that through legislation. He would also offer government jobs to anyone able to work. “The American workforce is being exploited and abused,” he says. “There is an upper-class structure who oversees people and tends to think of them as subordinates and personal subordinates in an underclass sort of way, in a lords and serfs mentality. We need to change the structure of that whole ideology.” PAULA MOSER-BARTLETT PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: Ander Crenshaw, Republican (incumbent); Deborah Katz-Pueschel, write-in candidate; Gary Koniz, no party affiliation Jacksonville attorney Paula Moser-Bartlett’s website, electpaula.org, delineates what you might call a classic liberal platform. (She didn’t return Folio Weekly’s phone calls.) She would require warrants for electronic surveillance, reduce greenhouse gas emissions and fund clean energy, oppose attempts to roll back Roe v. Wade and abortion rights, fight against anti-gay discrination, preserve national wildlife reserves and allow the states to decide if marijuana should be legalized. Although she only raised $5,000 in contributions, MoserBartlett has garnered some impressive support, according to her website, including endorsements by the Democratic Hispanic Caucus of Florida, the Florida chapter of the National Organization for Women, the Jacksonville Young Democrats, the Democrats Women’s Club of Florida and the Westside Democratic Club of Nassau County — perhaps a testament to the Democrats’ failure to field an opponent to Ander Crenshaw, who’s held this seat since 2001. DEBORAH KATZ-PUESCHEL PARTY: Write-in candidate OPPONENTS: Ander Crenshaw, Republican (incumbent); Gary Koniz, no party affiliation; Paula Moser-Bartlett, no party affiliation In the annals of the woman’s rights, Deborah Katz-Pueschel is noteworthy. In 1983 she won a landmark sexual harassment lawsuit against the Federal Aviation Administration that established what seems obvious today: crude and derogatory language alone can constitute sexual harassment. Katz-Pueschel was one of first women hired as an air traffic controller in 1974. After winning her lawsuit, Katz was reassigned to the same office and, she says, endured years of abuse and retaliation. She’s since fought to be awarded workman’s compensation and her retirement benefits, been audited by the IRS several times and been ordered to go back to work by the Labor OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

NEWS Department. She thinks that her experience as a government worker and her treatment as a public servant is a harbinger of how government will treat private citizens who stand against it. Her politics are conservative. She would repeal Obamacare, which she views as a harbinger of creeping socialism, cut the deficit, and audit all government agencies with a view toward getting government out of people’s lives. She says she likes Crenshaw but she doesn’t think he has the fire in his belly for the job. Although she says she is disabled by an illness contracted because of the environmental conditions she was exposed to as an air traffic controller, she thinks Congress can accommodate her. She can work the phones from her bed and manage her staff and have a hospital bed wheeled onto the House floor if necessary.

U.S. CONGRESS, DISTRICT 3

HOWARD “TERM LIMITS” LAWSON PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: Ted Yoho, Republican (incumbent); Manihelen Wheeler, Democrat

Retired St. Johns County road maintenance supervisor Howard “Term Limits” Lawson decided to run for the U.S. Congress because it’s the only way he’ll be able to amend the U.S. Constitution to institute term limits on senators and representatives. And that’s also the only reason he’s seeking office. “I have one position. Put term limits on Congress,” he says. “As a regular citizen, we cannot amend the Constitution by popular vote. It takes a constitutional amendment.” Becoming a U.S. representative is the only way he can introduce a constitutional amendment. Lawson wants members of the U.S House limited to four terms (or eight years) and members of the U.S. Senate limited to two terms (or 12 years) in office. Doing so, he says, “would sever the ties that elected officials have with big money, big business, special interests. Over years and years now it seems that those are the only people getting any attention in Washington.” If he doesn’t win — a long shot, he admits — he says he’ll get out of politics. “I’ll go back to fishing.”

STATE SENATOR, DISTRICT 6 GREG FELDMAN PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENTS: John Thrasher, Republican (incumbent); Kathleen Trued, Democrat

In his bid to unseat State Sen. John Thrasher — soon to vacate his seat and become the president of Florida State University anyway — Gary Feldman has visited every city and town in the three-county district to meet voters. He’s met with three voters and 300, he says. And his promise of change has resonated. “I’ve been watching Tallahassee for many years. This district is quite neglected,” says Feldman, a career law enforcement officer who retired in 2005 as assistant police chief of South Miami. “We do get our crumbs. But a lot of times we are overlooked. There’s been some economic development dollars for St. Augustine and some for Daytona Beach, but Thrasher hasn’t really tackled issues hampering economic growth and contributing to high unemployment.” Like many conservatives, Feldman believes government regulation and regulatory fees hamper small business. By reducing those costs and eliminating taxes, he thinks more people would go into businesses and more small businesses would have the money to expand.

He also wants to install tire rippers on Interstate ramps so that motorists entering the wrong way would be stopped when their tires deflate.

STATE REPRESENTATIVE, DISTRICT 15 KERRY KEITH KELLEY PARTY: Write-in candidate OPPONENT: Jay Fant, Republican

Here’s an interesting twist in Florida election law: In August, former president of the failed, family-owned First Guaranty Jay Fant won the Republican primary against Jacksonville attorney Paul Renner by two votes. Two. Votes. Had write-in candidate Keith Kelley not qualified for the November ballot, all registered voters in the district could have participated. Because he did, however, only Republicans could vote. And now, reached by phone, Kelley doesn’t want to talk about his platform or the election. “My situation has changed a bit since the primary,” he says. “That’s all I’m going to say.”

STATE REPRESENTATIVE, DISTRICT 16 BRUNELL WILLIAM MARTINEAU PARTY: Write-in candidate OPPONENT: Charles McBurney, Republican (incumbent)

It’s a similar story in District 16. Had Brunell William Martineau not qualified as a write-in, this election would have been open to any and all voters in August, regardless of their party affiliation, and would have been decided on primary day. Because of Martineau, however, only Republicans could vote. Martineau doesn’t appear to have ever been a serious candidate, even as a long shot. The telephone number that he listed on campaign documents filed with the state Division of Elections is for a Little Caesar’s pizza shop.

STATE REPRESENTATIVE, DISTRICT 17 REBECCA S. SHARP PARTY: No party affiliation OPPONENT: Ronald “Doc” Renuart, Republican (incumbent)

With her education as a nurse, accountant, theologian and computer specialist, and her time attending committee meetings and legislative proceedings since 2008, Rebecca Sharp believes she has the education and the political knowledge to serve northern St. Johns County. She ran for the office as a Republican who switched to a write-in candidacy in 2012. This time she’s running with no party affiliation. Sharp’s views are as varied as her background. She is adamant about restoring the St. Johns River and requiring polluters to stop dumping into the river. She says she supports dredging the river at Mayport to accommodate supersized container ships, but only if the river is cleaned up first. Although her stance on the river is proregulation, Sharp wants to get big government out of people’s personal lives, eliminate benefits for undocumented immigrants, ban automatic U.S. citizenship for children born on U.S. soil, and protect Floridians’ right to bear arms and use medical marijuana. In preparation for taking office, Sharp is working on a computer app that would allow registered voters in St. Johns County to review bills and vote them up or down. She says she would then cast her vote according to the majority decision.

Susan Cooper Eastman, Billy Manes and Erin Sullivan mail@folioweekly.com OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

T he ret urn of...

! S K S A M e r ’ y e Th R THEM!

n WEA ... a nd yo u c a

DE G R E E & C E RT I F IC AT E P RO G R A M S From business to aviation to communications and logistics, Florida State College at Jacksonville offers degrees and certificates in some of the most sought-after career fields on the First Coast. Whether you’re considering college for the first time, looking to advance in your current job or are a few credits short of earning your degree, make FSCJ your next step and apply today.

(904) 646-2300 | fscj.edu/more

We Are More. We Are FSCJ.

Now Enrolling for Spring

CHARLIE CRIST AND RICK SCOTT: THE TWO-HEADED MONSTER

Here are your choices in Tuesday’s election, dear Florida voter: The dead-eyed cartoon villain, or the shamelessly ambitious Oompa-Loopma-hued chameleon; the governor whose company engineered the largest Medicare fraud in the history of the United States, or the governor whose right-hand man went to prison for fraud; the rich bastard who bought one election and is trying to buy another, or the greasy smooth-talking bastard who called himself “Chain Gang Charlie” until chain gangs went out of style; the guy who adopted a rescue dog during his first campaign and unloaded it soon thereafter, or the guy who fawned after John McCain until McCain ditched him for Sarah Palin; the chrome-domed ghoul who wants to turn this state into an ALEC playground, or the two-faced manipulator who would tell his aides things like “I don’t care about those fucking details!” and who (as his then-chief of staff told the Tampa Bay Times earlier this year), about a year or so into his term as governor, began to lose interest in the job. Yes, Florida, these are your choices. You have every right to be horrified at this two-headed monster. — Jeffrey C. Billman

Florida State College at Jacksonville is a member of the Florida College System and is not affiliated with any other public or private university or college in Florida or elsewhere. Florida State College at Jacksonville does not discriminate against any person on the basis of race, color, ethnicity, genetic information, national origin, religion, gender, marital status, disability, or age in its programs or activities. Inquiries regarding the nondiscrimination policies may be directed to the College‚Äôs Equity Officer, 501 West State Street, Jacksonville, Florida 32202 | (904) 632-3221 | equityofficer@fscj.edu.

10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

INSTRUCTIONS: Cut out mask. Cut holes at either end of the headband. Wrap the headband around your head and tie together. Go vote, because it’s your civic duty. Take a long, hot shower, because you feel disgusting. Cry yourself to sleep.

ILLUST RAT IONS BY CHRIS HSU

JOHN KEANE

Since 1990, John Keane has reigned supreme over the Jacksonville Police and Fire Pension Fund, during which time he has amassed for himself a very special pension worth north of $2 million that the city believes is ill-gotten (that’s in addition to the $310,000 salary Keane, a retired rank-and-file member of the fire department, makes for managing all of six people). And, oh yeah, Keane’s pension fund is in the red to the tune of $1.7 billion, and could potentially cripple the city’s finances. No, that’s not all Keane’s fault. But while the mayor and City Council grapple with so many tough questions and unpalatable solutions, John Keane’s got nothing to worry about: his retirement plan, which he negotiated himself, is fully funded (100 percent, baby!) and in no danger. Keane’s not the only one who’s learned how to suck us dry: In August, the Times-Union reported that the chairman of the pension fund’s board of trustees, Bobby Deal, a retired cop, had worked the city’s Deferred Retirement Option Plan for a $4.9 million retirement. Hey, man, to the victor go the spoils. — AG Gancarski

INSTRUCTIONS: Cut out mask. Make holes for eyes. Rent a Lamborghini Aventador LP 700-4 to cruise around in Halloween night, send City Hall the bill.

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

INSTRUCTIONS: Cut out mask. Make holes for eyes. Wardrobe can be completed at Walmart. Ferrets optional.

DOC TONY

Local TV commercials are almost always amateurish, but no one around here turns up the schlock to 11 quite like Dr. Anthony Crothers, better known as Doc Tony. Watching the straw cowboy hat and T-shirtclad self-promoter standing in front of obviously fake backdrops, stiffly explaining his crack-andpop chiropractic therapy to accident victims, is ironically much like watching a slow-motion car crash – gruesome to watch, impossible to turn away from. Speaking rhythmically about his practice, Doc’s torso gyrates like a boiling teakettle, his left hand seldom leaving his hip as his right hand thrusts toward the camera in a manner that, frankly, makes us a little uncomfortable. And then there are the ferrets. In an ad called “Trust,” he holds two of the smelly little things – he calls them Ferret and Ferret, get it? – one in each hand, rambling through a quick-talking spiel about how ferrets come from the same family as weasels, and weasels can’t be trusted, and so … something something … you should trust him! And then he kisses them, which isn’t creepy at all. See how that works? Advertising magic. Remember, Jacksonville, he’s more than a catchy number, HE’S REEEEEEEEALLY SCARY! — Shan Stumpf 12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

MATT SHIRK

Your phone buzzes. You pick it up – a text from the boss. Want to meet me in my private office shower? Uhhhh … That’s a little creepers. In August, former administrative assistant Tiffany Ice filed a lawsuit against her exboss, Fourth Judicial Circuit Public Defender Matt Shirk, accusing him of sexual harassment (he also allegedly sent her an electronic greeting card that said, “I think if we had sex there would be very minimal awkwardness afterwards,” which allegedly did not produce the desired result, and probably would have in fact produced maximum awkwardness) and of having his chief of staff fire her soon after Shirk’s wife caught wind of his naughty text messages and barged into the office to confront her (drama!). Shirk has admitted to sending “inappropriate” texts (though not the shower one) and “funny e-cards” to female subordinates, and he also raised some eyebrows hiring two women straight out of a night club; as the TimesUnion so delicately put it, he and one of them “were perceived by some in the office to have an unusually close relationship.” Both of those women were canned in June 2013 along with Ice, and then two of the office’s investigators resigned in protest over how the women’s employment was handled. Now Shirk is being investigated by a grand jury, and his wife has filed for divorce. But hey – Matt’s still in office, and he’s still got that pretty face and that million-dollar smile that makes the ladies swoon (but not quite enough to jump in the shower with him, apparently). — Jeffrey C. Billman

INSTRUCTIONS: Cut out mask. Make holes for eyes. Douse yourself liberally with cologne, unbutton that shirt collar a little more and give the ladies what you know they really want.

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13

A RECENT TRAVELER TO SIERRA LEONE WITH VAGUELY FLU-LIKE SYMPTOMS

EVERYBODY. FREAK OUT! She’s a missionary, or maybe an aid worker, or maybe a doctor. We don’t really know. We don’t even know her name, or what she looks like, or whether she mingled with the masses at the St. Johns Town Center last night, or went bowling, or dined at the Olive Garden. All we know is that the news reports say she just came back from West Africa, AND SHE HAS A FEVER. The reporter man on the television is speaking in VERY DIRE TONES, and the woman on the street he’s interviewing is panicked. We should close the border, she says. Stop all flights. Quarantine everyone. Why won’t Obama do something? OK, if you might permit us a moment of Real Talk: As the Internet meme informs us, more Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola. We’re not sure which prospect is more frightening. HAPPY HALLOWEEN! — Jeffrey C. Billman

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

INSTRUCTIONS: Cut out mask. Make holes for eyes. For God’s sake, try not to sneeze on anybody. Oh, and wash your hands when you go to the bathroom.

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

Our Picks Reasons to leave the house this week

REEL TRUTH DOCTOBERFEST AT FLT

Diehard cineastes, casual movie buffs, lovers of nonfiction-geared film or people who just like to sit in a darkened theater can check out a weekend of noteworthy documentaries at the Fernandina Little Theatre’s second-annual DOCtoberfest film festival. Five films are featured this year, including Life Itself, which chronicles the life of Roger Ebert, and Muscle Shoals (pictured), the story of famed record producer Rick Hall and the legendary artists who cut tracks inside his studio’s doors. Oct. 31-Nov. 2, 1014 Beech St., tickets are $7, $30 for five-film pass; for a schedule of screen times, go to ameliaflt.org.

SYMPHONIC STRUT DOWNTOWN ART WALK

Classical music fills the air at next week’s First Wednesday Art Walk. In addition to the 55 venues, 11 live music clubs and hundreds of participating artists that make up this monthly celebration, this week’s “Musical Masquerade” features several musical, theatrical and dance performances. The entire Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra, the JSO Youth Orchestra, and students from Cathedral Arts Project, Jacksonville Heights Elementary and TheatreJax Ensemble will be commandeering Hemming Plaza. There’s also a presentation acknowledging Any Given Child, a national program that fosters student art education. Nov. 5, 5-9 p.m., Hemming Plaza and surrounding areas, Downtown, for a full schedule and listing of venues, visit jacksonvilleartwalk.com.

PARTY WITH THE DEAD LOS MOCALACAS

The Day of the Dead, or El Día de Muertos, is a colorful Mexican holiday honoring ancestors that traces its roots back to the pre-Columbian era. The Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville is holding its own shindig to celebrate this lively festivity with “Los MOCAlacas,” a Day of the Dead-themed celebration featuring seasonal foods, five tickets to redeem for your choice of fall beers, mask-making, dance performances by the FSCJ Dance Repertory Company and screenings of the films Day of the Dead (1957) and Oaxaca (2008). Oct. 30., 7-10 p.m., 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, Tickets are $30; ages 21 and up, mocajacksonville.com.

MONSTER SMASH KAIJU BIG BATTEL

In the world of sports, there is no greater thrill or splendor than watching costumed performers in monster suits smack the crap out of each other. Oh hell yes: Kaiju Big Battel is bringing its upcoming wrestling match, “Mutual Assured Destruction,” to town! This bizarre blend of professional wrestling and performance art features a cast of characters including such crowd favorites as Dr. Cube and his Posse, The Rogues, The Heroes and Space Bugs. So the story goes, these ungodly creatures vent their monstrous rage in the ring lest they unleash their destructive forces on planet Earth. Nov. 2, 1:30 p.m., at 1904 Music Hall, Downtown, $20. 1904musichall.com.

ALT-POP HERO PAUL COLLINS BEAT

Paul Collins first made his mark on the music scene with the seminal L.A. power pop band The Nerves. Their 1976 tune “Hanging on the Telephone” later became a hit for Blondie, and Collins and crew’s blend of melodic rock and edgy punk went on to influence bands like The Knack and The Plimsouls. Since then, Collins and his backing band The Beat have released more than a dozen releases and garnered a worldwide following of loyal fans, including Green Day, who performed Collins’ “Walking Out on Love” during the Broadway run of their American Idiot musical. Nov. 3, 8 p.m., Underbelly, Downtown, $5, underbelly.com. 16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

FOOTBALL BACCHANAL GEORGIA VS. FLORIDA FOOTBALL CLASSIC

Well, once again it’s Florida-Georgia Weekend, aka The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, and even though tickets for this annual pigskin-driven battle were sold out before you were born, there’s still a ton of party action to quell your jonesing for football revelry. You have two whole days to smear on that face paint (if you’re from around here, probably blue and orange, unless you’re embarrassed, which, well, given how things have gone lately, we understand), make a complete fool of yourself, mingle with thousands of other game-day zealots, and head Downtown to check out various activities around EverBank Field (including an obstacle course and a zipline), enjoy some contemporary country at the Tailgate Concert at The Shipyards (tickets start at $23), and hit The Landing to dig even more live bands, DJs and watch the big game on the Jumbotron. Also, beer might be consumed during this time. Oct. 31 and Nov. 1, Downtown; for a schedule of events, go to makeascenedowntown.com, jaxtailgate.com and jacksonvillelanding.com.

Upcoming acts Hypnotist Rich Guzzi

Oct. 28-Nov.1

Grab your friends and family and get ready to be entranced as Hypnotist Rich Guzzi brings volunteers on stage for a captivating experience to remember.

Wendy Liebman

November 6-8

With over 25 years under her belt as a stand-up comedian and a recent semi-finalist on America’s Got Talent, Wendy Liebman is sure to make any room fill with laughter.

Arnez J

November 13-15

Get ready to be entertained by the man who has had appearances on Showtime’s Comedy Club Network, NBC’s Friday Night Videos and his own BET special.

Buy tickets online at ComedyZone.com 904-292-4242

Located in the Ramada Mandarin I-295 and San Jose Blvd

/comedyzonejax

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

A&E // MUSIC

FRESH IMPRESSIONS

Mike Doughty blends innovative hip-hop with his own signature style for his latest release

Photo by Deborah Lopez

ith songs like “Oh My God Yeah Fuck It” and “Let’s Go To The Motherfucking Movies,” singer-songwriter Mike Doughty clearly doesn’t take himself too seriously. And neither does his audience. Doughty, who’s best known as the founder and frontman of 1990s alt-rockish quartet Soul Coughing — a band that went through what you might call a less-than-amicable split, which Doughty wrote about in his 2012 memoir The Book of Drugs — is touring the U.S. in support of his new album, Stellar Motel. The tour, which takes Doughty and longtime collaborator and cellist Andrew “Scrap” Livingston from Nevada to New York, is touted as “The Question Jar Show.” “It’s relatively self-explanatory. We have a jar, people put questions in it — the more bizarre the better — and we answer them between songs,” Doughty tells Folio Weekly. “Just the other day, somebody asked, ‘What happens to werewolves on the moon?’ I think I said something like, ‘They explode.’ My audience is really really into the weird stuff, so we rarely get serious questions. It’s almost kind of jarring — oh, sorry, that’s a terrible pun that I didn’t mean to make — when somebody gives us a serious question.” With nearly 20 solo albums in his repertoire and an unbelievably devoted fanbase, Doughty has taken to crowdfunding to put out his last few discs. Stellar Motel was funded through a PledgeMusic campaign in which he uploaded dozens of videos showing the project’s progression. He also offered some oddball incentives for donors: recordings on microcassette, lyrics typed on his 1980 IBM Selectric typewriter, a private concert via Skype, etc. “I don’t really know how it would work for everybody,” Doughty says of relying on fan donations. “But certainly an artist like me, who’s got a very loyal audience that is interested in getting more new music all the time — for somebody like me, it’s great.” Compared to Doughty’s roots — back when “Soundtrack to Mary” and “Circles” were getting spins on alt-rock radio — Stellar Motel is out of left field. Actually, it’s not even in the same ballpark. Doughty enlisted the help of hip-hop producer DJ Good Goose for his first all-original studio album in three years. (Last year he released a record that reimagined 13 Soul Coughing songs, which he’s previously claimed to detest hearing.) “It was very organic,” Doughty says of the collaboration. “It was very much a back-and-forth. I’d give him an element and he’d change it and give it back to me. And then I’d give him another element. It was just very natural and easy.” The 44-year-old Doughty relied on DJ Good Goose to bring in a younger sound, including rappers MC Frontalot, Miss Eaves, Big Dipper,

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Jay Boogie, Kim from the Japanese band Uhnellys, country singer Laura Lee Bishop, Brooklyn saxophone-and-drums band Moon Hooch and the female rap trio Hand Job Academy. The resulting record is perhaps Doughty’s finest solo effort: smart, thoughtful, energetic, infectious, fun, danceable, weird, catchy, everything a pop record should be. “Light Will Keep Your Heart Beating in the Future” and “When the Night Is Long,” the two leadoff tracks, stand out, as does the aforementioned “Oh My God Yeah Fuck It,” which is, for the most part, Doughty and Moon Hooch repeating the refrain “Oh my God, yeah, fuck it,” over and over again, interspersed with only the occasional verse, which should get old fast, but doesn’t. But Stellar Motel does more than function as a collective of good songs. It functions as a record, a cohesive whole, all 16 songs through. “It was really just conceived as a collaboration with him,” says Doughty of working with DJ Good Goose. “It wasn’t really a conscious pick of a direction. I think, obviously, him being him, there was going to be a lean towards hip-hop and dance music. But we just sat down and made the record between us.” Diehard Doughty fans needn’t worry. He promises a full range of new tunes, old favorites and classic Soul Coughing tracks will show up on his current tour. “I’ll know which one I’m going to start with and generally where I’m going to end,” he says of choosing a set list. Other than that, “it’s improvised every night. We don’t write it down. We just go from one song and figure out what the next one will be on the spot, but there will definitely be a thread. However loose, there is a thread and it’s got very much to do with the audience and how they’re feeling.” So what’s next for Doughty? Well, don’t ask him. He won’t tell you. “I always have something else on the burner, but I don’t like talking about it because it usually changes from the moment I start talking about it to the moment I start working on it,” he says. “In fact, I think if I talk about it, it will sort of put a curse on it and it will sound totally different than what I described it as.”

Kara Pound mail@folioweekly.com

MIKE DOUGHTY 8 p.m. Oct. 29 at Café Eleven, St. Augustine $18 in advance; $20 at the door Ages 21 and up

A&E // MUSIC

THE REAL SPACE COWBOY

Photo by Crackerfarm

SturgillSimpson Simpsonupends upends Sturgill traditionalcountry countrywith with traditional a groovy, idiosyncratic, a groovy, idiosyncratic, psychedelictake take psychedelic

teve Miller first dubbed himself the “Space Cowboy” in 1969. But modern-day trouba dour Sturgill Simpson has snatched that title outright on the strength of his most recent self-recorded, self-released album. His zonked-out take on traditional country fits in with oldschool envelope pushers like Waylon Jennings, Kris Kristofferson and Willie Nelson — and his booming baritone is right up George Strait’s charttopping alley. But Simpson’s music is far more philosophical, spiritual and mystical than anything ever released in Nashville. The Kentucky native’s sophomore record, Metamodern Sounds in Country Music, rocked the country establishment when it was released in May. It’s a thoughtful, pedal steel-bathed slab of Grand Ole Opry sumptuousness that incorporates Hendrix-like guitar pyrotechnics and druggy reverb. Meanwhile, its lyrics trip through psychedelic thought experiments, religion as dogma and drug, and conformity’s dirty underbelly. But for every despairing line about how Simpson doesn’t have to “do a goddamn thing except sit around and wait to die” (“Living the Dream”) — or how he “Woke up today and decided to kill my ego” (“Just Let Go”) — there are equally lush appeals about how “Love’s the only thing that’s ever saved my life” (“Turtles All the Way Down”) and “I’d give anything to go back to the days when I was young” (“Pan Bowl”). The whole album slyly references big-idea books The Spirit Molecule and The Phenomenon of Man, and Simpson has described it as a “social consciousness record disguised as a country record” and a “hippie love project.” But it’s also an eminently gracious collection of hits that’s galvanized the vocal traditional country community and built upon the gritty strengths of Simpson’s 2013 debut, High Top Mountain. That’s evident on stunning moments like “The Promise,” while Simpson’s easygoing approach is obvious on honky-tonk hellraisers like “Long White Line” and “A Little Light.” And if you’re looking for shit-hot guitar riffs, look no further than sun-scorched seven-minute epic “It Ain’t All Flowers”; its heavy grooves indicate a willingness to bend the country template during Simpson and his backing band’s electrifying live show. But be prepared for the 36-year-old’s normcore appearance when he hits the stage: flannel or

denim shirts, rumpled jeans, tennis shoes with no socks, hipster scruff. Critics swear it’s a carefully cultivated look, while fans stand by their fiercely independent man probably not giving two hoots about his appearance. Simpson knows how to ruffle feathers, though. Last month’s performance on Conan O’Brien Presents, during which Simpson performed “Living the Dream” and didn’t censor out the song’s many instances of “goddamn,” generated a head-scratching online firestorm. The gleefully contrarian artist responded with a Kanye Westworthy tirade on his Facebook page: “Since I’m self-funding/self-releasing my art instead of shooting for ACM awards and taking it up the ass from the music row man, I have the right to write and sing and say whatever I choose …. So with that said, 1. I sang it like I wrote it, 2. Censorship is bullshit, 3. This is America and people can say anything they want, including ‘Goddamn’ at the top of their lungs on national TV.” Such an uncompromising persona is paying off. In September, Simpson won the Americana Music Association’s Emerging Artist of the Year award. His upcoming tour includes soldout multiple-night stands in major markets like Nashville, San Francisco and Denver. He’s scheduled to open for Willie Nelson during the counterculture demigod’s annual holiday appearance at Austin City Limits Live. And everyone from Rolling Stone to The New York Times to NPR has devoted extensive storytelling effort to decoding his motivations. But Simpson says he’s got no master plan to upend mainstream country’s lucrative beaches, bros and babes mentality. “It feels like [journalists] want to lure me into being the poster boy to talk shit about modern country, and I just don’t have anything to really offer there,” he told Rolling Stone in June. “I’ve never pursued that side of the industry …. Tompall Glaser said it best in the ‘70s: ‘Unless you have a solution or an alternative, shut the fuck up. Because you’re just part of the problem.’” Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com STURGILL SIMPSON with CRIS JACOBS 8 p.m. Nov. 2 at Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $12

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

A&E // MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

SPADE McQUADE 6 p.m. Oct. 29 at Fionn MacCool’s Irish Pub, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, Downtown, 374-1247. RED BEARD & STINKY E 7 p.m. Oct. 29 at Ragtime Tavern, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877. MIKE DOUGHTY 8 p.m. Oct. 29 at Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311, $20. THE POLISH AMBASSADOR, LIMINUS, MR. LIF, AYLE NEREO, WILDLIGHT 8 p.m. Oct. 29 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, 246-2473, $20. PAINT FUMES, THE MOLD, MOTHER SUPERIOR 8 p.m. Oct. 29 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, 353-6067, $5. NATO COLES & THE BLUE DIAMOND BAND, ARMS ALOFT, SPRUCE BRINGSTEEN 8 p.m. Oct. 29 at Shanghai Nobby’s, 10 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 547-2188, $5. THE DRUIDS 7 p.m. Oct. 30 at Ragtime Tavern. MARK MANDEVILLE & RAIANNE RICHARDS, PAUL & KAY GARFINKEL 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., San Marco, 352-7008. BE EASY 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30 at Latitude 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555. OBN IIIs, GOLDEN PELICANS, BURNT HAIR, THE LIFEFORMS 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at rain dogs., 1045 Park St., Riverside, 379-4969, $8. BRADY CLAMPITT CD RELEASE PARTY with SENTROPOLIS 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, 699-8186. BRIEF LIVES, CIGARETTE CROSSFIRE, SANDRATTZ

8 p.m. Oct. 30 at Burro Bar, $6. SHELLSHAG, VACATION, BENNY THE JET RODRIGUEZ, CINCINNATI ROYALS 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at Shanghai Nobby’s, $5. BILL KIRCHEN AND TOO MUCH FUN, FAUXGRASS, BRYCE ALASTAIR BAND 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-7496, $15. 418 BAND 8 p.m. Oct. 30 at Riverfront Stage, The Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 356-1110, free. FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE, COLE SWINDELL, THE CADILLAC THREE, CLARE DUNN, JOHN KING, MICHAEL RAY 2 p.m. Oct. 31 at Jacksonville Shipyards, 2060 E. Adams St., Downtown, 354-3278, $23-$141. jaxtailgate.com. Suwannee Hulaween: THE STRING CHEESE INCIDENT, THIEVERY CORPORATION, BIG GIGANTIC, BEATS ANTIQUE, THE NEW DEAL, JOE RUSSO’S ALMOST DEAD, GREENSKY BLUEGRASS, RISING APPALACHIA, GREENHOUSE LOUNGE, MICHAEL TRAVIS, JASON HANN, EOTO Oct. 31-Nov. 2 at Spirit of the Suwannee, 95th Drive, Live Oak, for a complete schedule and to purchase tickets, go to musicliveshere.com. DJ VIRA HALLOWEEN KARAOKE COSTUME CONTEST 8 p.m. Oct. 31 at Shanghai Nobby’s. SUPERVILLAINS, THROUGH THE ROOTS, SIDEREAL, CLOUD 9 8 p.m. Oct. 31 at Freebird Live, $10. DAVID COOK, CLAYTON BUSH 8 p.m. Oct. 31 at Jack Rabbits, $15. BAY STREET 9 p.m. Oct. 31 & Nov. 1 at Ragtime Tavern SUNBEARS! 9 p.m. Oct. 31 at Underbelly. KRACKA JAXX 9 p.m. Oct. 31 at Fionn MacCool’s, Downtown. DARYL HANCE 9:30 p.m. Oct. 31 at Dog Star Tavern, 10 N. 2nd St., Fernandina Beach, 277-8010. FILMSTRIP 10 p.m. Oct. 31 at The Hourglass Pub, 345 E. Bay St., Downtown, 469-1719. CARL & THE BLACK LUNGS 10 p.m. Oct. 31 & Nov. 1 at Flying Iguana, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. ANGEL OLSEN, LIONLIMB 8 p.m. Nov. 1 at Jack Rabbits, $10. ARVID SMITH 8 p.m. on Nov. 1 at Murray Hill Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., Murray Hill, 388-3179, $5. STEVE POLTZ, DONNY BRAZILE 8 p.m. Nov. 1 at Café Eleven, $15. STAYNE THEE ANGEL, GENERATOR, A NEW DECREE, ANTIC, DAMN THY NAME 8 p.m. Nov. 1 at Freebird Live, $8. SAMUEL SANDERS DUO 8:30 p.m. Nov. 1 at Latitude 360. AUSTIN PARK 9 p.m. Nov. 1 at Fionn MacCool’s, Downtown. SPLIT TONE 9 p.m. Nov. 1 at Riverfront Stage, The Landing. THE DRUIDS 10 p.m. Nov. 1 at Your Place Bar & Grill, 13245 Atlantic Blvd., Intracoastal West, 221-9994. SELF DEFENSE FAMILY, GOODTIME BOYS 7 p.m. Nov. 2 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $10. RADIOLOVE 7:30 p.m. Nov. 2 at Latitude 360. NEW KINGSTON, I-RESOLUTION, MYSTIC DINO & THE KIDS, DJ

Local blues rocker BRADY CLAMPITT holds a CD release party for his new album, Things Are Different Now, at Underbelly on Oct. 30. RAGGAMUFFIN 8 p.m. Nov. 2 at Freebird Live, $10. STURGILL SIMPSON, CRIS JACOBS 8 p.m. Nov. 2 at Jack Rabbits, $12. PAUL COLLINS BEAT, THE LIFEFORMS 8 p.m. Nov. 3 at Underbelly. VATTNET VISKAR, PALLBEARER 8 p.m. Nov. 3 at Burro Bar, $5. MELVINS, HONKY 8 p.m. Nov. 3 at Jack Rabbits, $17. 7 SECONDS, THE INTERRUPTERS, POOR RICHARDS 7 p.m. Nov. 4 at Jack Rabbits, $15. WHETHERMAN 6 p.m. Nov. 5 at Underbelly. HOLD YOUR OWN, EDENFIELD, FADE INTO DEMISE8 p.m. Nov. 5 at Jack Rabbits, $8. LARRY MANGUM, CHARLEY SIMMONS, CARLEY BAK 8 p.m. Nov. 5 at Mudville Music Room. CHARLIE & THE FOXTROTS 8 p.m. Nov. 5 at Burro Bar, $5.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

CASTING CROWNS Nov. 6, Veterans Memorial Arena CHERYL WHEELER Nov. 6, Café Eleven TONY LUCCA Nov. 6, Jack Rabbits THE MURDERBURGERS, RATIONAL ANTHEM, ERIC AYOTTE, THE RESONANTS Nov. 6, Shanghai Nobby’s SUSAN BOYLE Nov. 6, Times-Union Center DESTROYER OF LIGHT Nov. 6, Burro Bar MALCOLM HOLCOMBE Nov. 6, Mudville Music Room DAVE ROSS COMEDY TOUR Nov. 6, Underbelly Old City Music Fest: OLD DOMINION, JASON D. WILLIAMS Nov. 7, St. Augustine JACOB POWELL Nov. 7, Mavericks START MAKING SENSE, GOV CLUB, LAKE DISNEY Nov. 7,ASK FOR BENEFIT SUPPORT Jack Rabbits TIM KAISER, PAUL METZGER Nov. 7, Sun-Ray Cinema THE FRITZ, HERD OF WATTS Nov. 7, 1904 Music Hall BLACK LILLIES Nov. 7, Colonial Quarter, St. Augustine THE DRUIDS Nov. 7, My Place Bar & Grill GUANTANAMO BAYWATCH, POOKIE AND THE POODLEZ, WET NURSES, THE GUN HOES Nov. 7, Shanghai Nobby’s

This is

For questions, please ca

PROMISE OF

JAX BEACH

YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD RESTAURANT Open 11 AM Daily • NFL Sunday Ticket MONDAY Margarita Mondays TUESDAY Kids Dinner Show 6 - 8 PM Karaoke 9 - Close WEDNESDAY Trivia Nation & Jax Holdem Poker Night 7p-10p THURSDAY Caribe Thursday’s 9PM-1AM FRIDAY-SATURDAY Friday & Saturday 9pm-2am (SEC Saturday’s) Home of the World’s Most Talented Wait Staff

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

ACTI

A&E // MUSIC THE LAST SONS, SONS NOT BEGGARS, THE HAPPY FACED MISTAKES, ASKMEIFICARE Nov. 7, Freebird SAM PACETTI Nov. 7, Mudville Music Room Old City Music Fest: JOAN JETT & THE BLACKHEARTS, WILL HOGE Nov. 8, St. Augustine HEART Nov. 8, St. Augustine Amphitheatre PRIME TREES, PRIDELESS, SWEET HAYAH Nov. 8, Freebird PROFESSOR WHISKEY’S TRAVELING BIZARRE BAZAAR Nov. 8, Underbelly THE WILDTONES, LAUREL LEE & THE ESCAPEES Nov. 8, Shanghai Nobby’s PORCHFEST with MONDO MIKE & THE PO BOYS, THE WELL BEINGS, MAMA BLUE, EL CONJUNTO TROPICAL, JACKSONVILLE OLD TIME JAM, PRELUDE CHAMBER QUARTET, REDNECK HUMMUS, DOUG VANDERLAAN & HEATHER PERRY, DOUGLAS ANDERSON GUITAR ENSEMBLE, JOE SHUCK, CANARY IN THE COALMINE, BAY STREET, DIRT FLOOR KRACKERS, KATIE HELOW & ZACH LEVER, CRAZY DAYSIES, LAUREN FINCHAM & MIKE PEARSON, GOLIATH FLORES, TROPIC OF CANCER, JESSE MONTOYA Nov. 8, Springfield (various locations) LOVE, LIVE, LAUGH: TAMAR BRAXTON, NEPHEW TOMMY, RICKY SMILEY, SPECIAL K, LYFE JENNINGS Nov. 8, Veterans Memorial Arena BT, FARACE, DAVE BERG Nov. 8, Eclipse Nightclub STEVE SYLVIA Nov. 8, Tempo DANKA, PRIME TREES, PRICELESS, SWEET HAYAH, FAZE WAVE Nov. 8, Freebird Live RANDY NEWMAN Nov. 9, Flagler College PHILLIP PHILLIPS Nov. 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MARY CHAPIN CARPENTER, TIFT MERRITT Nov. 9, Florida Theatre GRINGO STARR Nov. 9, Underbelly BILLY PONTIUS, TEXAS PLANT, MENTAL BOY, VERY NERVOUS Nov. 10, Shanghai Nobby’s THE LONE BELLOW Nov. 10, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall TAB BENOIT, DEVON ALLMAN BAND Nov. 12, P.V. Concert Hall MATISYAHU Nov. 12, The Florida Theatre REVEREND HORTON HEAT, GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE Nov. 12, Jack Rabbits SEVENDUST Nov. 12, Underbelly Bear Creek Music & Arts Festival: DUMPSTAPHUNK, UMPHREY’S McGEE, ST. PAUL & THE BROKEN BONES, OTEIL BURBRIDGE, ZACH DEPUTY, MINGO FISHTRAP, THE FRITZ, CATFISH ALLIANCE Nov. 13-16, Suwannee Music Park ROD PICOTT, TRACY GRAMMER Nov. 13, Mudville Music Room TRIBAL SEEDS, BALLYHOO, GONZO, BEYOND I-SIGHT Nov. 13, Freebird Live LECRAE Nov. 13, The Florida Theatre SAINTSENECA Nov. 13, Jack Rabbits NONPOINT, GEMINI SYNDROME, ISLANDER, 3 YEARS HOLLOW Nov. 13, 1904 Music Hall BRET MICHAELS Nov. 13, Mavericks O.A.R., ANDY GRAMMER Nov. 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE DRUIDS Nov. 14, West Inn Cantina LOCAL HONEY ARTIST SHOWCASE Nov. 14, Colonial Quarters, St. Augustine MATTHEW & GUNNAR NELSON Nov. 14, P.V. Concert Hall DIRTY HEADS, ROME Nov. 14, Mavericks THE CURT TOWNE BAND, FIREROAD, JAKE CALHOUN & THE CHASERS Nov. 14, Freebird Live CLARENCE CARTER Nov. 14, The Ritz Theatre HOUSE CATS Nov. 14, Tempo GYPSY STAR with REBECCA ZAPEN Nov. 14, Mudville Music Room EX CULT, GOLDEN PELICANS, BROWN PALACE, THE MOLD Nov. 14, Shanghai Nobby’s JUSTIN TOWNES EARLE, CORY BRANAN Nov. 15, Colonial Quarters, St. Augustine SICK OF IT ALL, NEGATIVE APPROACH, RHYTHM OF FEAR Nov. 15, Jack Rabbits MANNHEIM STEAMROLLER CHRISTMAS Nov. 15, T-U Center CELTIC THUNDER Nov. 15, The Florida Theatre THE DELUSIONAIRES, LAUREL LEE & THE ESCAPEES, KENSLEY STEWART Nov. 15, Shanghai Nobby’s SUNSPOTS, WHAT HEART, RANDY LANE Nov. 15, Freebird Live DENNIS FERMIN Nov. 14, Tempo FINE ART OF JAZZ TRIBUTE TO COUNT BASIE Nov. 18, The Ritz Theatre COURAGE MY LOVE, BUTTONS, EVERSAY Nov. 18, Jack Rabbits WHITECHAPEL, GLASS CLOUD, OF TRIBE & TRUTH Nov. 18, Freebird Live TOMBOI, PROM DATE, HEAVY DREAMS, DREAM EAGLE Nov. 19, 1904 Music Hall JAMES TAYLOR & HIS ALL-STAR BAND: LOU MARINI, WALT FOWLER, LARRY GOLDINGS, LUIS CONTE, STEVE GADD, ANDREA ZONN, KATE MARKOWITZ, ARNOLD McCULLER, DAVID LASLEY, JIMMY JOHNSON, MICHAEL LANDAU Nov. 19, Veterans Memorial Arena BURNING ITCH, TIGHT GENES Nov. 19, Shanghai Nobby’s ERIC LINDELL Nov. 20, Mojo Kitchen TOMBOI, BOYFRIEND, HEAVY FLOW, MF GOON Nov. 20, Shanghai Nobby’s THE WORD ALIVE, COLOR MORALE, OUR LAST NIGHT, THE DEAD RABBITS, MISS FORTUNE Nov. 20, Underbelly LES RACQUET, CIVIL BRUTE Nov. 20, 1904 Music Hall MELISSA ETHERIDGE, ALEXANDER CARDINALE Nov. 21, The Florida Theatre LIGHT YEARS, DRIVER FRIENDLY Nov. 21, Burro Bar THIRD DAY Nov. 21, Times-Union Center NATALIE STOVALL & THE DRIVE Nov. 21, Mavericks CATCH THE GROOVE Nov. 21, Mudville Music Room THE JACKSONVILLE OLD TIME JAM Nov. 21, Underbelly PUJOL. SCAVUZZOS Nov. 21, Shanghai Nobby’s SEVEN NATIONS Nov. 22, Lynch’s Irish Pub FLOGGING MOLLY Nov. 22, Seawalk Pavilion

OTIS CLAY Nov. 22, The Ritz Theatre I-VIBES Nov. 22, Freebird Live DENNIS FERMIN Nov. 22, Tempo FLATBUSH ZOMBIES, THE UNDERACHIEVERS Nov. 22, Underbelly TENTH AVENUE NORTH, KB, ROYAL TAILOR Nov. 22, Murray Hill Theatre AS BLOOD RUNS BLACK, RINGS OF SATURN, UPON THIS DAWNING, THE CONVALESCENCE Nov. 22, 1904 Music Hall EVERYMEN, SPEAK EASY, THE WEIGHTED HANDS Nov. 23, Shanghai Nobby’s RELIENT K, BLONDFIRE, FROM INDIAN LAKES Nov. 24, Freebird Live AARON CARTER, BILLY WINFIELD, RAQUEL CABRERA Nov. 25, Jack Rabbits PASSAFIRE, THE HIP ABDUCTION Nov. 28, Freebird Live SANTOROS, PSYCHOMAGIC Nov. 28, Shanghai Nobby’s SLAVES, GET SCARED, FAVORITE WEAPON Nov. 28, 1904 Music Hall COSBY SWEATER Nov. 29, 1904 Music Hall RONNIE DOZIER, JASMINE RHEY Nov. 29 at The Ritz Theatre I-WAYNE, BLACK AM I Nov. 29, Freebird Live MATTHEW ELLIS Nov. 29, Burro Bar PRIMER 55, RAZORZ EDGE Nov. 30, Jack Rabbits 69 BOYZ, 95 SOUTH, QUAD CITY FAMILY Nov. 30, Eclipse EVERYTIME I DIE, THE GHOST INSIDE, ARCHITECTS, HUNDREDTH, BACKTRACK Dec. 1, Underbelly TEACH ME EQUALS Dec. 3, Shanghai Nobby’s The Big Ticket: FALL OUT BOY, WEEZER, ALT-J, YOUNG THE GIANT, CHEVELLE, NEW POLITICS, J RODDY, BIG DATA, BEAR HANDS, YOUNG RISING SONS, ISLANDER Dec. 5, Metropolitan Park HUNTER HAYES Dec. 5, Veterans Memorial Arena WHO RESCUED WHO Dec. 5, Lynch’s Irish Pub URBAN JAZZ COALITION Dec. 6, The Ritz Theatre FOZZY Dec. 6, Aqua Club & Lounge JUBILEE RIOTS Dec. 6, Café Eleven DARYL HALL & JOHN OATES Dec. 6, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE DRUIDS Dec. 6, Your Place Bar & Grill THE MISFITS Dec. 6, Underbelly THE TRAVELIN’ McCOURYS, BILLY NERSHI Dec. 6, Freebird Live BLOOD ON THE DANCE FLOOR, WHITNEY PEYTON Dec. 6, 1904 Music Hall MODERN BASEBALL, KNUCKLE PUCK, SOMOS Dec. 7, Underbelly WHEN YOU WISH UPON A STAR: INTERPRETATIONS FROM THE DISNEY SONGBOOKS Dec. 7, Sun-Ray Cinema

QUINTRON & MISS PUSSYCAT, WHITE MYSTERY, BURNT HAIR, MOLD Dec. 9, Underbelly SARAH MAC BAND Dec. 10, Mudville Music Room PIERCE PETTIS Dec. 11, Mudville Music Room TRAMPLED BY TURTLES, NIKKI LANE Dec. 12, P.V. Concert Hall Society for the Prevention of Suicide Benefit with JULIE DURDEN and GUESTS Dec. 12, Mudville Music Room THE SUNPILOTS Dec. 12, Jack Rabbits SHFB BURLESQUE SHOW Dec. 12, Shanghai Nobby’s ALLEN TOUSSAINT Dec. 13, The Ritz Theatre JACK MENTZEL Dec. 13, Mudville Music Room BRIAN POSEHN Dec. 13, Underbelly DIERKS BENTLEY Dec. 13, Glynn County Football Stadium ZULU WAVE, WRAY, GLORIES, STRANGE LORDS, TAMBOR, BURL, THE WEIGHTED HANDS, DREDGER, GHOST TROPIC Dec. 13, Shanghai Nobby’s WYNONNA & THE BIG NOISE Dec. 14, The Florida Theatre ARS PHOENIX, BURNT HAIR, SEVERED+SAID, IRONING, SUPER FAMICOM, DJ VAS TOY, COLD WASTE, VERANEAR, RAIN SYMBOLS Dec. 14, Shanghai Nobby’s

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

A&E // MUSIC Augustine Amphitheatre STRINGFEVER March 5, Café Eleven Aura Music & Arts Festival: MOE, THE DISCO BISCUITS, PAPADOSIO, SNARKY PUPPY, THE MAIN SQUEEZE, PIGEONS PLAYING PING PONG, McLOVINS, GHOST OWL March 6-8, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park THREE DOG NIGHT March 10, The Florida Theatre FULLSET March 12, Mudville Music Room JOHN MELLENCAMP: PLAIN SPOKEN TOUR March 15, Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts CYRUS CHESTNUT March 20, The Ritz Theatre MAVIS STAPLES March 21, The Ritz Theatre JACKIE EVANCHE March 22, The Florida Theatre BRONX WANDERERS March 29, The Florida Theatre JANIS IAN, TOM PAXTON April 9, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE ORCHESTRA (Former ELO & ELO II members) April 11, The Florida Theatre THE WHO HITS 50! TOUR April 19, Veterans Memorial Arena RAIN April 24, The Florida Theatre CHRIS BOTTI April 30, The Florida Theatre ZZ TOP, JEFF BECK May 9, St. Augustine Amphitheatre FLORIDA COUNTRY SUPERFEST with ZAC BROWN BAND, KENNY CHESNEY, KEITH URBAN, BRANTLEY GILBERT, COLE SWINDELL, TYLER FARR, DAVID NAIL, COLT FORD, DANIELLE BRADBERY, THE SWON BROTHERS June 13 & 14, EverBank Field

LIVE MUSIC CLUBS

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH

DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE 802 Ash St., 310-6049 John Springer every Tue.-Wed. Aaron Bing 6 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. GREEN TURTLE 14 S. Third St., 321-2324 Buck Smith every Thur. Yancy Clegg every Sun. Vinyl Record Nite every Tue. HAMMERHEADS 2045 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-7783 DJ Refresh 9 p.m. every Sun. THE SURF 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-8999 Live music every Fri. & Sat.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

Progressive keyboard-driven group THE TOM BENNETT BAND performs at Riverside Arts Market at 2:30 p.m. on Nov. 1. FINE ART OF JAZZ TRIBUTE TO MARY LOU WILLIAMS Dec. 16, The Ritz Theatre JOE BONAMASSA Dec. 17, The Florida Theatre BAD SANTA, GRANT PEEPLES Dec. 17, Mudville Music Room GUNTHER DOG, CONCORD AMERICA Dec. 17, Shanghai Nobby’s BOWSER & THE STINGRAYS, HERMAN’S HERMITS & PETER NOONE, GARY PUCKETT & THE UNION GAP Dec. 18, Florida Theatre TRACE ADKINS Dec. 19, The Florida Theatre WOLF FACE Dec. 19, Shanghai Nobby’s STRANGLED DARLINGS Dec. 20, Burro Bar BOBBY LEE RODGERS Dec. 20, Freebird Live A SWAMP RADIO CHRISTMAS Dec. 21, The Florida Theatre DJ ICEY, BABY ANNE Dec. 25, Eclipse Nightclub INSPECTION 12 Dec. 27, Freebird Live FORSAKEN PROFITS Dec. 30, Burro Bar THE CORBITT BROTHERS Dec. 31, Freebird Live DARYL HANCE, BRENT BYRD & THE SUITCASE GYPSIES Jan. 3, Underbelly DON WILLIAMS Jan. 7, The Florida Theatre ’70s Soul Jam: THE SPINNERS, THE STYLISTICS, THE MAIN INGREDIENT Jan. 8, The Florida Theatre FRED EAGLESMITH Jan. 9, Café Eleven MISERY HEAD, CRASHMIR, THE EMBRACED Jan. 10, Freebird Live MIRANDA SINGS Jan. 14, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall TIM EASTON, HEATHER PIERSON Jan. 14, Mudville Music Room J.W. TELLER Jan. 16, Burro Bar TEDESCHI TRUCKS BAND Jan. 16, The Florida Theatre THE BOTH (AIMEE MANN, TED LEO) Jan. 16, P.V. Concert Hall CASE Jan. 16, The Ritz Theatre SANDY HACKETT’S RAT PACK SHOW Jan. 16, Times-Union Center

22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

for the Performing Arts’ Moran Theater MONROE CROSSING Jan. 16, Mudville Music Room DIANE SCHUUR Jan. 17, The Ritz Theatre HARDIN & BURNS Jan. 17, Mudville Music Room THE GLENN MILLER ORCHESTRA Jan. 18, FSCJ Wilson Center OF MONTREAL Jan. 19, Freebird Live SHOVELS & ROPE, CAROLINE ROSE Jan. 20, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall GAELIC STORM Jan 21, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall KATHLEEN MADIGAN Jan. 22, The Florida Theatre IRIS DEMENT Jan. 23, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall NOTHIN’ FANCY Jan. 24, Mudville Music Room EARPHUNK Jan. 27, Freebird Live ARLO GUTHRIE Jan. 29, The Florida Theatre GALACTIC Jan. 29, Freebird Live DAVID WILCOX Jan. 29, Café Eleven URSAMINOR, SURVIVING SEPTEMBER, THE HEALING PROCESS, NOCTURNAL STATE OF MIND Jan. 31, Freebird Live TRAVIS TRITT Feb. 6, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE PIANO GUYS Feb. 6, The Florida Theatre VINCE GILL & TIME JUMPERS Feb. 7, The Florida Theatre JOE CROOKSTON Feb. 7, Mudville Music Room JON SHAIN, RUPERT WATES Feb. 12, Mudville Music Room CHERRY POPPIN’ DADDIES Salute The Music of the Rat Pack Feb. 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall JOHN HAMMOND Feb. 20, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MARCUS ROBERTS TRIO Feb. 20, The Florida Theatre DENNIS DeYOUNG & The Music of Styx Feb. 21, Florida Theatre THE MIDTOWN MEN Feb. 26, The Florida Theatre THE DOOBIE BROTHERS, MARSHALL TUCKER BAND Feb. 27, St.

CASBAH CAFÉ 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores 9 p.m. every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE 4219 St. Johns Ave. KJ Free 9 p.m. every Tue. & Thur. Indie dance 9 p.m. Wed. ’80s & ’90s dance 9 p.m. every Fri. Music every Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 Live music every Thur.-Sat. night.

BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted) BILLY’S BOATHOUSE 2321 Beach Blvd., 241-9771 Billy Bowers 6 p.m. Oct. 30. Jetty Cats 6 p.m. Oct. 31. Supernatural Duo 6 p.m. Nov. 1. Open mic every Wed. BRASS ANCHOR PUB 2292 Mayport Rd., Ste. 35, Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Open mic every Wed. CULHANE’S IRISH PUB 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Irish music 6:30 p.m. every Sun. DJ Hal every Sat. FLYING IGUANA 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 Carl & The Black Lungs 10 p.m. Oct. 31 & Nov. 1. Live music every Fri. & Sat. Red Beard & Stinky E 10 p.m. every Thur. FREEBIRD LIVE 200 N. First St., 246-2473 The Polish Ambassador, Liminus with Mr. Lif, Ayla Nereo & Wildlight 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Supervillains, Through the Roots, Sidereal, Cloud 9 8 p.m. Oct. 31. Stayne Thee Angel, Generator, A New Decree, Antic, Damn Thy Name 8 p.m. Nov. 1. New Kingston, I-Resolution, Mystic Dino & The Kids, DJ Ragamuffin 8 p.m. Nov. 2 HARMONIOUS MONKS 320 First St. N., 372-0815 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. Dan Evans, Spade McQuade 6

p.m. every Sun. Back From the Brink 9 p.m. every Mon. LILLIE’S COFFEE BAR 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-2922 The New Moon Ramblers Oct. 31. Live music every Fri. & Sat. LYNCH’S IRISH PUB 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Blistur Oct. 31 & Nov. 1. Dirty Pete every Wed. Split Tone every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. Who Rescued Who every Sun. MELLOW MUSHROOM 1018 N. Third St., 246-1500 Wilder Sons Oct. 30. Squeedlepuss Oc. 31 MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Neil Dixon 6 p.m. every Tue. Gypsies Ginger 6 p.m. every Wed. Mike Shackelford & Steve Shanholtzer 6 p.m. every Thur. NIPPERS BEACH GRILLE 2309 Beach Blvd., 247-3300 Cloud 9 Oct. 29. Pili Pili Oct. 30 NORTH BEACH BISTRO 725 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 372-4105 Neil Dixon 7 p.m. Oct. 30. PIER CANTINA & SANDBAR 412 First St. N., 246-6454 Split Tone every Fri. Crazy Daisies 7:30 p.m. Oct. 31. Sidetrack 7:30 p.m. Nov. 1 RAGTIME TAVERN 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Red Beard & Stinky E 7 p.m. Oct. 29. The Druids 7 p.m. Oct. 30. Bay Street 9 p.m. Oct. 31 & Nov. 1. Live music every Thur.-Sun. WIPEOUTS GRILL 1589 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 247-4508 Live music every Thur. and Fri.

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL 19 Ocean St. N. Self Defense Family, Good Time Boys 7 p.m. Nov. 2. Open mic jam every Mon. BURRO BAR 100 E. Adams St., 353-4686 Paint Fumes, The Mold, Mother Superior 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Brief Lives, Cigarette Crossfire, Sandrattz 8 p.m. Oct. 30. Vattnet Viskar, Pallbearer 8 p.m. Nov. 3. Charlie & The Foxtrots 8 p.m. Nov. 5 FIONN MacCOOL’S Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247 Spade McQuade 6-9 p.m. Oct. 29. Kracka Jaxx 9 p.m. Oct. 31. Austin Park 9 p.m. Nov. 1. Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. JACKSONVILLE LANDING 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 418 Band 8 p.m. Oct. 30. Split Tone 9 p.m. Nov. 1 MARK’S DOWNTOWN 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Roy Luis every Wed. DJ Vinn every Thur. DJ 007 every Fri. Bay Street every Sat. MAVERICKS Jax Landing, 2 Independent Dr., 356-1110 Joe Buck, Big Tasty every Thur.-Sat. UNDERBELLY 113 E. Bay St., 699-8186 Brady Clampitt, Sentropolis 8 p.m. Oct. 30, Sunbears! 9 p.m. Oct. 31. Paul Collins Beat, The Lifeforms Nov. 3. Whetherman Nov. 5

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999 Jay Decosta Peele 9 p.m. Oct. 30. Ivey West Band 9 p.m. Oct. 31 WHITEY’S FISH CAMP 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 The Mad Hatters 9 p.m. Oct. 31 & Nov. 1. Open mic 9 p.m. every Thur. Deck music 5 p.m. every Fri. & Sat., 4:30 p.m. every Sun.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL 3033 Monument Rd., Ste. 2, 645-5162 Metal Militia Oct. 29. Ruckus Oct. 31. Lift Nov. 1. DJ Big Rob every Thur., Sun. & Tue. JERRY’S SPORTS GRILLE 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Live music every Fri. & Sat. YOUR PLACE 13245 Atlantic Blvd., 221-9994 The Druids 10 p.m. Nov. 1

MANDARIN, JULINGTON

HARMONIOUS MONKS 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., 880-3040 Open mic: Synergy 8 p.m. every Wed. World’s Most Talented Waitstaff at 9 p.m. every Fri.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

THE HILLTOP 2030 Wells, 272-5959 John Michael every Wed.-Sat. PREVATT’S SPORTS BAR 2620 Blanding Blvd., 282-1564 DJ Tammy 9 p.m. every Wed.

A&E // MUSIC Cleveland indie rockers FILMSTRIP play at The Hourglass Pub on Oct. 31.

THE ROADHOUSE 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Cupid’s Alley 10 p.m. Oct. 31. DJ Corey B every Wed. Live music every Fri. & Sat.

PONTE VEDRA, PALM VALLEY

PUSSER’S GRILLE 816 A1A N., 280-7766 Live music every Wed.-Sun. TABLE 1 330 A1A N., Ste. 208, 280-5515 Deron Baker 6 p.m. Oct. 29. Gary Starling Jazz Band 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30. Colton McKenna & Todd Jones 7:30 p.m. Oct. 31. Live music every Thur.-Sun.

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

MURRAY HILL THEATRE 932 Edgewood Ave. S., 388-7807 Arvid Smith 8 p.m. on Nov. 1 rain dogs.1045 Park St., 379-4969 OBN IIIs, Golden Pelicans, Burnt Hair, The Lifeforms 8 p.m. Oct. 30 RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Buddy Sherwood School of Dance, RickoLus, Tala, and Tom Bennett Band starting 10:30 a.m. Nov. 1

ST. AUGUSTINE

ANN O’MALLEY’S 23 Orange St., 825-4040 Circus Mutt Oct. 31. Open mic with Smokey Joe every Tue. CAFE ELEVEN 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 Mike Doughty 8 p.m. Oct. 29. Steve Poltz and Donny Brazile 8 p.m. Nov. 1 THE CONCH HOUSE 57 Comares Ave., 829-8646 Pat Murphy 5 p.m. Oct. 30. Henry & The Seahawks 4-8 p.m. and DJ Raggamuffin 8 p.m. Oct. 31 THE CELLAR UPSTAIRS 157 King St., 826-1594 Billy Buchanan & Free Avenue 7 p.m. Oct. 31. Ian Kelly at 2 p.m. and The Committee Band at 7 p.m. Nov. 1. Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. Nov 2 HARRY’S 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765 Billy Bowers Oct. 29. Henry Murphy Oct. 30. Caleb Joye Duo Oct. 31. Oct. 26.; all at 6 p.m. each day. MILL TOP TAVERN & LISTENING ROOM 19-1/2 St. George St., 829-2329 Nathaniel Good, Todd & Molly Jones, Adam Lee Oct. 29. Don Oja Dunaway, David Dowling, Aaron Esposito Oct. 30. Don Oja Dunaway, Alex and Jim, Brent Byrd & the Suitcase Gypsies Oct. 31. Aaron Esposito, Donny Brazile, Brent Byrd & the Suitcase Gypsies Nov. 1 PIZZALLEY’S CHIANTI ROOM 60 Charlotte St., 825-4100 Michael Howard 3 p.m. Mon.-Fri. TEMPO 16 Cathedral Place, 342-0286 Marianne Lerbs at 9 p.m. on Oct. 31. Jim and Jake at 9 p.m. on Nov. 1. Open mic 7 p.m. every Wed. Live music every Fri. & Sat. TRADEWINDS 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336

Matanzas every Sun.-Thur. Elizabeth Roth 1 p.m. every Sat.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

INDOCHINE San Marco & Buddha Lounge, 1974 San Marco Blvd., 503-7013 Dance Radio Underground, Sugar & Cream, Black Hoodie, Bass Therapy Sessions 10 p.m.-mid. Allan GIz-Roc Oteyza, Scott Perry aka TrapNasty and Cry Havoc rotate, mid.-3 a.m. for Fever Saturdays JACK RABBITS 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Bill Kirchen and Too Much Fun, Fauxgrass, Bryce Alastair 8 p.m. Oct. 30. David Cook, Clayton Bush 8 p.m. Oct. 31. Angel Olsen, Lionlimb 8 p.m. Nov. 1. Sturgill Simpson, Cris Jacobs 8 p.m. Nov. 2. Melvins, Honky 8 p.m. Nov. 3. 7 Seconds, The Interrupters, Poor Richards 7 p.m. Nov. 4. Hold Your Own, Edenfield, Fade Into Demise 8 p.m. Nov. 5 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Mark Mandeville & Raianne Richards, Paul & Kay Garfinkel 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30. Larry Mangum, Charley Simmons, Carley Bak 8 p.m. Nov. 5

SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS

COMEDY CLUB 11000 Beach Blvd., Ste. 8, 646-4277 Fascinating Rhythm Orchestra 7 p.m. 1st & 3rd Wed. COPPER TAP HOUSE 13500 Beach Blvd., 647-6595 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. DANCIN DRAGON 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888 A DJ spins every Fri. & Sat. LATITUDE 360 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 Be Easy 7:30 p.m. Oct. 30. Samuel Sanders Duo 8:30 p.m. Nov. 1. 7:30 p.m. Nov. 2 MELLOW MUSHROOM 9734 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 997-1955 Charlie Walker on Oct. 30. Jameyal on Oct. 31. Ouija Brothers on Nov. 1. Live music every Thur. & Fri. MY PLACE BAR & GRILL 9550 Baymeadows, 737-5299 Aaron Sheeks Oct. 29. Dirty Pete Oct. 30. Chuck Nash Oct. 31. Fat Cactus Nov 1 WILD WING CAFÉ 4555 Southside Blvd., 998-9464 Chris Brinkley Oct. 29. Yankee Slickers Oct. 31 WORLD OF BEER 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 551-5929 Chillakaya on Oct. 31. Live music every Fri. & Sat.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

3 LIONS SPORTS PUB & GRILL 2467 Faye Rd., 647-8625 Dave Bazzell every Thur. HIGHWAY 17 ROADHOUSE 850532 U.S. 17, Yulee, 225-9211 Live music most weekends THREE LAYERS COFFEEHOUSE 1602 Walnut St., 355-9791 Open mic every Thur.

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

THE KNIFE

FIVE REASONS TO LISTEN TO THE MELVINS

ditor’s Note: This is not really the editor. It’s me, John, but I thought it would sound more official if I called it an “Editor’s Note.” Warning … If you’re a Melvins fan, stop reading now, because not only do you already know all of this shit, but you probably have your own list of five reasons to listen to The Melvins. Hell, you’ll probably even take me to task for calling them The Melvins rather than just Melvins, because that’s how hardcore fans are. They have to make a big freaking deal out of everything. So do yourself and me a favor and stop reading now. Also, I am fully aware that by issuing this fake editor’s note, I just guaranteed that you will read this entire article. So damn me straight to hell. Love, Fake Editor. Now that we got that out of the way, here are five reasons to listen to The Melvins. Omitted from the list is the old standby — because Kurt Cobain used to be their roadie. I don’t even know if this is true. I don’t even care that much. (It is kind of cool, however, that Melvins drummer Dale Crover played on Nirvana’s early demos, some of which were used on the band’s debut album, Bleach. But that’s not a reason to listen to The Melvins. That’s a reason to listen to Bleach.) OK, on with the list.

1. They did Karaoke on Pancake Mountain

The coolest kids show ever, the now defunct cable-access program Pancake Mountain featured indie rockers and punkers interacting with children and hand puppets, one of whom was a little sheep dog named Rufus. In their clip from the show, The Melvins are setting up for a gig when Rufus asks how long until they are ready to play. When the band informs him they need 20 minutes, Rufus gets depressed and needs cheering, so the kids suggest a little Karaoke to lift his spirits. When The Melvins finally come around, Rufus is in no mood for their shenanigans. He challenges the band to a Karaoke battle. They duke it out singing The Ramones’ “I Want to Be Sedated.” The Melvins close their segment with a rousing live rendition of their own song “The Kicking Machine,” with a gaggle of kids jumping and thrashing all over the stage. (Fake Editor: Hey Melvins fan, you may be thinking, “I’m hardcore, but what the hell is Pancake Mountain? Yeah, bitch. You ain’t that hardcore now, are ya?)

2. King Buzzo’s Hair

24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Founder and chief songwriter Buzz Osborne has some crazy locks, even as he continues to gray out in his advancing years. His ’do is huge and

curly, and it shows no sign of retreating. Why is this a reason to listen to the band? It’s not, really. But holy shit — that hair. (Fake Editor: If you are a Melvins fan, you are probably balding at this point. Live vicariously through King Buzzo. It’s OK. We all do.)

3. Bullhead

I got into The Melvins because a friend of mine put together a Melvins mix tape (yes, tape) back in the early ‘90s that he called John’s Pet Goat. It was full of their earlier stuff, very slow and sludgy and, well, sludgy. Bullhead, the band’s 1991 album, was featured prominently on the tape. The opener, “Boris,” is cinderblock heavy, brutal and thick and Sabbathy. If you’ve never listened to The Melvins before, start there. (Fake Editor: All right, Hardcore Fan. You can sit and brood about how I didn’t pick Stoner Witch or any of the Ipecac recordings, which are great, sure, but damn … Bullhead, you know?)

4. Two Drummers

Sure, many bands have had two drummers, but those bands suck. Not really. But seriously, those bands don’t play smash-you-in-the-mug sludge metal with odd time shifts and goofball lyrics, which pretty much means they suck. Right now it’s Crover and Coady Willis behind the kits, a double-barrel blast of power that makes The Melvins tunes sludgier and drummier. (Fake Editor: Drummier is now a word. Deal with it.)

5. Fantomas

Imagine The Melvins, Slayer and Faith No More bundled into one lovely package, and you’ve got Fantomas. Why is this important? Because, at its core, Fantomas is The Melvins. Yes, Slayer drummer Dave Lombardo adds a hint of the speed metal that brought his native band to underground fame. And yes, FNM singer Mike Patton does vocal cartwheels all over the stuff as only he knows how. But King Buzzo resides deep within, making the material very much Melvinsy. And if you really want to have your face torn off and thrown into a flesh grinder, check out the Fantomas Melvins Big Band. (Fake Editor: Melvinsy is now a word. Deal with it.) John E. Citrone theknife@folioweekly.com MELVINS with HONKY 8 p.m. Nov. 3 at Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $17

A&E // MOVIES

PLAYING THE PART

Bill Murray doesn’t disappoint as the anti-hero of the overly schematic St. Vincent

here are times when it feels like filmmakers The Karate Kid. are writing Characters, and there are times But the problem with St. Vincent isn’t merely when it feels like they’re writing Parts. And that it’s schematic; it’s that it’s so schematic. It while this may seem like merely a semantic doesn’t take much time before we see Vincent distinction, St. Vincent is a perfect example to visiting a patient in an Alzheimer’s care facility, the contrary. whose relationship to him is fairly clear from the Because while a Character is created as outset. He looks out for the health-care needs of something out of which a story emerges, a the pregnant Russian prostitute Daka (Naomi Part is created to appeal to an actor. A Part Watts, accent-acting her ass off ) he frequents. has “moments” — catchy lines of dialogue, And we see Oliver’s religious studies teacher or big speeches, or emotional breakdowns. Brother Geraghty (Chris O’Dowd) assign the All three can be executed on the page well or students the task of creating a biography of badly, and performed well or badly, but they’re someone they consider a real-life modern-day still fundamentally aiming for a very different saint, and it’s a complete mystery who Oliver audience response. Characters may be great might consider as his subject if you forget the pieces of writing, but Parts? Well, Parts get name of the movie you’re watching. noticed when people talk about awards. The unfortunate part is that the And writer/director Theodore Melfi has performances really are strong enough to given Bill Murray a classic Part in St. Vincent. carry St. Vincent through most of its clunky He plays Vincent MacKenna, a Brooklyn native manipulations. Murray aims for something who’s introduced to us as the kind of guy more than “get off my lawn” curmudgeonliness, Charles Bukowski would think was living a finding sparks of funky energy that give bit too hard — an alcoholic in dangerous debt Vincent vitality beyond his asshole-in-needfrom gambling on horse races, of-redemption roots. Young living in a disastrously messy, Lieberher is also pretty solid underwater-mortgaged house in a convincing take on ST. VINCENT with only his cat as company. adolescent geekiness, and **G@ But he’s still got enough life in McCarthy nicely underplays Rated PG-13 him that he can throw down a the role of a struggling mom funky solo dance to Jefferson trying to figure out her new Airplane’s “Somebody to Love.” Vincent’s got identity. When those three are playing off one your attention. Parts have a way of doing that. another — the less said about Watts’ thankless The plot thickens when new neighbors role, the better, really — St. Vincent hits more move in next door: newly single-mom Maggie than a few funny, satisfying moments. (Melissa McCarthy) and her 12-year-old son, But there’s a degree of calculation at the Oliver (Jaeden Lieberher). Maggie’s new job heart of this movie that makes it impossible to as a CAT scan tech at a local hospital has her become immersed in it, no matter how sloppily working late hours, so she needs someone appealing Murray may be in individual scenes. to keep an eye on Oliver when he comes The whole thing is built to reach its crescendo home from school; Vincent needs cash. And during Oliver’s school assembly presenting so Vincent comes to take Oliver under his his report on “saints among us,” where our dissolute wing. emotionally wounded anti-hero will realize that The surrogate-father relationship drives most somebody gets him, having found his humanity of St. Vincent, providing awkward moments like in scenes that might as well come with a sign Vincent taking Oliver with him to the track or reading “LOOK FOR HUMANITY HERE.” his local bar, and the gradual softening of the Where actors get a chance to disappear into misanthropic caretaker that is fundamental to Characters, St. Vincent shows us what’s expected stories of this kind. When bullied Oliver needs to happen when actors get Parts: They stand somebody to show him how to stand up for at center stage, receiving an award, waiting for everyone to applaud. himself, a disgusted Vincent steps in to teach Oliver a few tricks; it’s like Bad Santa, if what Scott Renshaw Bad Santa really wanted for Christmas was to be mail@folioweekly.com

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25

A&E // MOVIES

IF IT BLEEDS, IT LEADS

Jake Gyllenhaal stars as a rogue news hound in this effective and eerie crime thriller

26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

the film is better because of it. Note the way he term “nightcrawler” refers to his calm monotone voice and big eyes have a videographers who listen to police disarming effect, suggesting a gentility about scanners, race to crime scenes, film the Lou that’s belied by his conduct. The truth action and then sell the footage to local news is Lou is an avaricious monster who will do stations. The profession is not virtuous, but it is necessary for television news, and proficient or say anything to get what he wants in any aspect of his life. nightcrawlers can make a nice living at it. The night shooting in Los Angeles And when you’re a sociopath who has no brings two recent films to mind, both of qualms about moving a dead body before which showcased a superior visual pallet police arrive to get a better shot, as is the case than what’s seen here. Both Michael Mann’s in Nightcrawler, even better. Collateral (2004) and Nicholas Winding The reason TV news covets the salacious Refn’s Drive (2011) hit the right notes of material is because its ratings books suggest that’s what people want to see. If it bleeds coarseness and muted neon to almost make it leads, right? So TV producers feed the the city a character in itself. Here, though, nightcrawling monster; the hell with positive Gilroy eschews the broader scope for a series stories of people doing good when there’s of smaller moments that highlight Lou’s a home invasion isolation but fail to paint with three murders L.A. as a city of sin. This NIGHTCRAWLER in an affluent is appropriate for the film, neighborhood. but one wonders how Lou ***G These (seeming) would’ve handled being in Rated R facts are what real danger himself. Nightcrawler gets Nightcrawler is a right: That a thief and sociopath like Lou fascinating, dark and damning film that has Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal) can buy a camera and the guts to say things we don’t want to hear. police scanner, find an accident/crime scene, Its grim subject matter suggests limited box record the footage and try to sell it to news office prospects, and in truth it will play better director Nina (Rene Russo) at a local station. with the indie film crowd (it was the talk With moderate success he can afford to of the town at the Toronto Film Festival in upgrade his equipment, hire helper Rick (Riz September) than the mainstream. Ahmed), and learn Business 101 basics online. It’s kind of ironic, actually: Viewers Lou also discovers that orchestrating accident/ flock to this type of content on TV news, crime scenes so he can be the first one there but when it’s presented in an unflattering — even before police — can be much more way on a movie screen people are more likely lucrative, and with no moral compass the to stay away. entire city of Los Angeles is at risk. Dan Hudak Gyllenhaal is nothing short of creepy, and mail@folioweekly.com

A&E // MOVIES

MAGIC LANTERNS

TRUE VILLAINS

Nazis make the ultimate monsters, both in fact and fiction. Next to the minions of the Third Reich, fantasy creatures like zombies, werewolves, vampires and even chainsaw maniacs are lightweights. For the same reason, Nazis have always been the perfect movie villains, even before we Americans began fighting them in WWII. Just released for the first time on Blu-ray is Fritz Lang’s Man Hunt (1941), which premiered on American movie screens six months before the bombing of Pearl Harbor. Initially quite controversial, particularly among those who (for a variety of reasons) favored American disengagement from the European war, the movie opens with a startling scene, set a few months before Germany’s invasion of Poland. Crouched on the edge of a ravine, a man (Walter Pidgeon) carefully assembles a long-range rifle and proceeds to center his scope on a distant target, which, as it comes into focus, turns out to be Adolf Hitler. The shooter even pulls the trigger, though it quickly turns out the rifle is empty. Immediately apprehended by a watchful guard, the man protests that it was only a contest. He had no intention of shooting the Führer, only demonstrating that it could be done. Interrogated further by a ruthless Gestapo agent (George Sanders), the man reveals that he is merely a biggame hunter intrigued by the challenge of placing Hitler in his crosshairs. He’s telling the truth, but the Nazis don’t care. After trying to torture him into confessing that he is a British agent, they try to kill him — unsuccessfully, of course, since the movie has only just begun. What follows is a suspenseful manhunt in the tradition of Hitchcock as the Nazi thugs pursue their quarry back to England, perpetrating one atrocity after another, including killing the sweet young heroine (something Hitchcock would have never done). The movie concludes months later, with Britain now at war and our hero parachuting into Germany, rifle in arms, determined to rectify his earlier mistake. To the strains of “God Save the Queen” (which American audiences would recognize as “My Country ‘Tis of Thee”), the film concludes with the narrator’s solemn pronouncement: “And from now on, somewhere within Germany is a man with a precision rifle and the high degree of intelligence and training that is required to use it. It may be days, months, or even years, but this time he clearly knows his purpose … and, unflinching, faces his destiny.” If only. Fritz Lang’s fanciful film got me thinking about other movie Nazis that we have loved to hate over the years, even in films far less serious than Man Hunt or later classics like Schindler’s List. It’s no accident that George Lucas would set Indiana Jones fighting them in two of Indy’s four adventures. Marathon Man (1976) featured Laurence Olivier as a memorably sadistic Nazi dentist going to work on a hapless Dustin Hoffman. Then two years later Olivier switched nationalities and accents in The Boys from Brazil, this time playing a Jewish Holocaust survivor on the trail of the diabolical Dr. Josef Mengele (Gregory Peck, playing against type). And only two years ago we had Nazis at the Center of the Earth (the plot is evident in the title) and the comic thriller Iron Sky, with the Nazis fashioning a Fourth Reich on the moon! Saving the least for last, let’s try to forget They Saved Hitler’s Brain (1968). Happy Halloween! Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

Matthew McConaughey is out to save humanity in Christopher Nolan’s INTERSTELLAR.

**** ***@ **@@ *@@@

FILM RATINGS

SONNY SHARROCK SONNY STITT SONNY PAYNE SONNY BONO

SCREENINGS AROUND TOWN SUN-RAY CINEMA Keep On Keepin’ On, Listen Up Philip and Revenge of the Green Dragons open on Oct. 31. The Rocky Horror Picture Show is screened at 10 p.m. on Oct. 31 and Nov. 1. Interstellar opens on Nov. 4. St. Vincent, Gone Girl, and Pride are currently screening at Sun-Ray Cinema, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 3590049, sunraycinema.com. LATITUDE 360 MOVIES Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and Maleficent screen at Latitude 360’s CineGrille Theater, 10370 Philips Hwy., Southside, 365-5555, latitude360.com/jacksonville-fl. WGHF IMAX THEATER Dracula Untold, D-Day Normandy 1944 3D, Island of Lemurs Madagascar 3D, Journey to the South Pacific: An IMAX 3D Experience, Jerusalem, and We The People are currently screening at World Golf Village Hall of Fame IMAX Theater, 1 World Golf Place, St. Augustine, 940-4133, worldgolfimax.com. THE CORAZON CINEMA AND CAFÉ The Shining is screened 7 p.m. nightly through Oct. 31. Psycho is screened 8 p.m. nightly through Oct. 31 at 36 Granada St., St. Augustine, 679-5736, corazoncinemaandcafe.com. FRANKENSTEIN (MILLER AS CREATURE) Academy Award-winning director Danny Boyle directs the National Theatre Live’s broadcast of Mary Shelley’s classic horror tale, starring Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonny Lee Miller, at 7 p.m. on Oct. 29 at AMC Regency Square 24, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., Cinemark Tinseltown USA, 4535 Southside Blvd. and Regal Avenues, 9525 Philips Hwy. Tickets are available now at participating theater box offi ces and at fathomevents.com. CARMEN The Metropolitan Opera’s performance of Bizet’s beloved opera opus is screened at 12:55 p.m. on Nov. 1 at AMC Regency Square 24, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., Regal Avenues, 9525 Philips Hwy. and Cinemark Tinseltown USA, 4535 Southside Blvd. fathomevents.com. RIFFTRAX: ANACONDA The stars of Mystery Science Theater 300 provide a live, humorous audio commentary to this 1997 snake-driven horror flick at 8 p.m. on Oct. 30 at AMC Regency Square 24, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., Regal Avenues, 9525 Philips Hwy. and Cinemark Tinseltown USA, 4535 Southside Blvd. and at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 4 at Regal Avenues. fathomevents.com. SECOND ANNUAL DOCTOBERFEST The Fernandina Little Theatre screens Crazy Love at 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 31 and 1:30 p.m. on Nov. 2; Muscle Shoals at 11 a.m. and 8:30 p.m. on Nov. 1; Whitey: United States of America v. James J. Bulger at 1:30 p.m. on Nov. 1 and 6:30 p.m. on Nov. 2; Smash His Camera at 4 p.m. on Nov. 1 and 11:30 a.m. on Nov. 2 and Life Itself at 6 p.m. on Nov. 1 and 4 p.m. on Nov. 2 at 1014 Beech St., 206-2607. Tickets are $7; $30 for five film pass. ameliaflt.org.

NOW SHOWING ADDICTED Rated R Amazon smut artist (and federal tax cheat) Zane adapts her novel about a married black woman who develops a dangerous compulsion to sleep with other men. Sexual sistershaming: It isn’t just for white people anymore! Costars Sharon Leal, Boris Kodjoe and John Newberg. — Steve Schneider ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY Rated PG **G@ I don’t know how to break it to you, kid, but Judy Moody just had herself an entire kickass summer. Costars Steve Carell, Jennifer Garner, Ed Oxenbould, Megan Mullally and Jennifer Coolidge. Dick Van Dyke has a cameo. — S.S. ANNABELLE Rated R One of the highlights of my movie-going career was attending a midnight screening of Bride of Chucky that was attended by a splendid array of thrill-seeking reprobates. My favorites were the family of four at the very head of the line, who enthusiastically informed the ticket-taker they’d spent the night before re-watching all the previous Chucky movies, “to catch up.” (To CATCH UP.) Maybe someday, some equally dedicated clan will undertake a similar marathon to reacquaint themselves with the adventures of Annabelle, the possessed children’s doll now being spun off from the sleeper horror hit The Conjuring into her very own prequel vehicle. Then again, maybe I shouldn’t get my hopes up: Doesn’t the Bible say that man will only receive one Chucky per generation? — S.S. BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP Rated R S.J. Watson’s source novel was an out-of-nowhere phenomenon, thrilling readers across the globe with its story of a woman who awakes every morning with her memory wiped. OK, so we can define “out of nowhere” as “out of a place where nobody has seen Memento.” Which, I guess, is why this film adaptation – which stars Nicole Kidman in the Guy Pearce role – is being castigated on IMDB as a rip-off of 50 First Dates. Christ, it’s all enough to make you want to watch Shutter Island again. (But only if you can forget it immediately, of course.) — S.S. THE BEST OF ME Rated PG-13 If Hollywood has taught me anything, it’s that the funeral of a friend is a great opportunity to get laid. Seen The Big Chill lately? I mean, once Costner’s uncredited body was in the box, it was, like, P for miles. Now Nicholas Sparks contributes to the proud tradition, with the story of two former sweethearts (James Marsden and Michelle Monaghan) who seize on their buddy’s death as a chance to rekindle A long-dormant attraction. Up next: Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson in Funeral Crashers! — S.S. THE BOOK OF LIFE ***G Rated PG First-time writer-director Jorge R. Gutierrez knocks one out of the park with this animated telling of the story of the Hispanic holiday Día de los Muertos, or Day of the Dead. When the mayor’s daughter María (voiced by Zoë Saldana) is courted by two childhood friends seeking her hand in marriage, the

rulers of the underworld (voiced by Kate del Castillo and Ron Perlman) place a bet on who will win her hand. Driven by an original plot and played out on the screen with dazzling animation, The Book of Life ramps up the game on fantasy filmmaking. — Daniel A. Brown THE BOXTROLLS **** Rated PG Loosely adapted from Alan Snow’s 2005 book Here Be Monsters, this animated feature is the tale of the titular creatures, reclusive scavengers who live beneath the surface world in the heart of Cheesebridge’s pointy mountain. Yet they’re believed to steal babies and eat humans – a story given some credence by the disappearance of one infant 10 years earlier. The “Boxtroll exterminator,” Archibald Snatcher (voiced by Ben Kingsley), is trying to maximize that fear in order to move up the Cheesebridge hierarchy into the world of the “white hats,” even as the now-10-year-old Boxtroll-raised human boy, called Eggs (Isaac Hempstead Wright), begins to wonder if he may belong to a different world. The town’s selfabsorbed, cheese-nibbling, white-hat-wearing oligarchy – led by Lord Portley-Rind (Jared Harris), whose daughter Winnie (Elle Fanning) befriends Eggs – is the perfect launching pad for Snatcher’s disgruntled sense of entitlement. — Scott Renshaw DEAR WHITE PEOPLE Rated R This smart, witty and thought-provoking comedy from firsttime director Justin Simien chronicles the lives of four AfricanAmerican students and their experiences while studying at the predominately white Winchester College. After activist Samantha White is elected as head of a black residency hall, a cultural war breaks out on campus that culminates in a riotous Halloween party. Tyler James Williams (Everybody Hates Chris), Tessa Thompson (Veronica Mars) and Dennis Haysbert (24) star in this surefire contender for the best college movie of its generation. — D.B. DRACULA UNTOLD Rated PG-13 Desperate to create a “shared universe” for its classic horror characters, Universal has reboots coming of Dracula, Frankenstein and a whole cemetery plot’s worth of their pals. In the driver’s seat? The guys who brought you Transformers. And before you declare that idea the pits, consider this: Dracula Untold is an unrelated, low-priority quickie the studio had to get out of the way first. The breath, it truly does catch. Costars Luke Evans, Dominic Cooper and Sarah Gadon. — S.S. THE EQUALIZER Rated R Back in the late ’80s, I had a buddy who was heavily into the CBS grayhead-revenge series The Equalizer; when his metal band released its first single, he even cited the show as “inspiration” in the liner notes. Now it’s 2014, Edward Woodward has become Denzel Washington, and I don’t wanna THINK about what kind of indie music this pseudoremake might spark. A plot seemingly lifted wholesale from Washington’s Man on Fire (not to mention The Professional, last month’s The November Man, and probably the stock footage you get when you install iMovie) indicates that director Antoine Fuqua isn’t counting on diehards like my old pal for anything more than a few bucks’ worth of first-weekend insurance. — S.S. FURY ***G

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

A&E // MOVIES Rated R Ask any product of America’s school system to name something that happened during the last few months of World War II, and the likely answer will be “Captain America got frozen in a block of ice.” (Hell, it’s all I could name off the top of my head. Sorry, Bono!) Apparently, Brad Pitt also got in a spot of trouble, risking his life to command a tank crew on a dangerous mission into the heart of the collapsing Nazi empire. But really, how tough was Germany by April of 1945 anyway? As I recall from my studies, that Twilight Zone guy who had wished to be made the ruler of a great nation was already cooped up tight in his bunker, realizing he was Hitler and getting ready to eat a bullet. Not very tough competition there, amirite? (Now let me tell you what the Discovery Channel has taught me about haunted houses.) — S.S. GONE GIRL **@@ Rated R This is a horror movie about Nick and Amy Dunne, about what happens on their fifth wedding anniversary, when Amy disappears and the police believe Nick may have killed Amy for various apparent motives. Amy (Rosamund Pike) is famous; she was the inspiration for some popular children’s books her mother wrote, so her disappearance is major national news. Nonstop media attention is a metaphor for the limited perspective we ever have on someone else’s relationship: A couple might look happy in public, but only they know what goes on behind closed doors. Flashbacks to Amy and Nick’s life from the moment they meet are an intimate peek into what’s been going on between them, and it’s not pretty. We get her side of the “But I changed for him!” story. You pretended to be something you’re not, and now you hate what you’ve become and resent your husband for it? Whose fault is that? Same goes for Nick (Ben Affleck). We get his side of the marriage from his conversations with his twin sister, Margo (Carrie Coon). The movie throws out all ambiguity. What started as reasonable cynicism about an institution (marriage) that many people have doubts about ends in a perilous realm that appears to willfully misunderstand realities of domestic violence. It’s all fantasy, of a sort … and it’s frightening. — MaryAnn Johanson THE GOOD LIE Rated PG-13 In the latest bit of socially conscious drama from Monsieur Lazhar director Philippe Falardeau, Reese Witherspoon helps rescue the Lost Boys displaced by the Sudanese civil war. Her novel approach: Getting snockered and bellowing “You’re about to find out who I am!” until the government lets her have her way. — S.S. THE GUEST Rated R This thriller plays on our innate desire to believe the best about folks, in this case, a young soldier visits a family grieving the death of their son fighting overseas. He befriends them, charming each family member. Then weird stuff begins to happen and well, ya know: Fish and company wear out their welcome after three days. Time’s up! — Marlene Dryden KEEP ON KEEPIN’ ON Rated R Five years in the making, director Al Hick’s documentary tells the story of 93-year-old legendary jazz trumpet player Clark Terry, a musician who mentored Miles Davis and played in both Duke Ellington and Count Basie’s bands. While chronicling Terry’s accomplishments, the film also focuses on his friendship with a 23-year-old blind piano prodigy and shows how they face two of their greatest challenges together. — D.B.

KATHITHI Not Rated This Bollywood action-thriller heist is directed by AR Murugadoss and stars Samantha Ruth Prabhu, Neil Nitin Mukesh, Tota Roy Chowdhury and Sathish. In Tamil. JOHN WICK Rated R Viva la violence! Apparently the movie gods long ago decided that a week couldn’t go by without a hit man emerging from retirement for our carnage-witnessing pleasure. This time, the pissed-off pro in question is played by Keanu Reeves, because IT COULD HAPPEN. Directors Chad Stahelski and David Leitch are former stuntmen making their debut as filmmakers, so expect lots of emphasis on Meisner technique and emotional truth. — S.S. THE JUDGE **G@ Rated R Wedding Crashers director David Dobkin casts Robert Downey Jr. as a hotshot lawyer who has to defend his own father (Robert Duvall) on a murder charge. “What a perfect idea for a John Grisham property,” said nobody you ever loved or trusted. — S.S. KILL THE MESSENGER Rated R IMDB describes this one as a crime drama/biography. It’s based on events that happened to journalist Gary Webb when he reported on CIA activity in Nicaragua, involving drugs, arms dealing and general clandestine hijinks. Hey, just say no, T-men. — M.D. LEFT BEHIND Rated PG-13 For a while there, it was amusing to cluck about the terrible movies Nic Cage had to keep making because he’d lost all his money. (Andy Samberg got some good mileage out of it.) But no amount of destitution could justify Cage’s decision to take the lead role in a mainstream, big-studio adaptation of the odious Left Behind series of fundie wish-fulfillment novels. Somehow, a huge swath of secular America has convinced itself that the books are just fun apocalyptic sci-fi, when they’re really sneeringly superior whack-job theology that wishes death and damnation on everyone standing to the left of Pat Robertson. The last thing this county needs is a “name” star (even a now-laughingstock of one) conferring further legitimacy on that sort of “entertainment.” Hey, Nic: Get back in the cage. And stay there. — S.S. THE MAZE RUNNER Rated PG-13 In this week’s bit of YA-derived dystopia, a bunch of teen himbos with no memory struggle to escape a mysterious prison. Spotting the symbolism yet? The arrival of an actual girl changes everything, while raising my hopes that the story can ultimately viewed as a commentary on the Duke lacrosse rape scandal. A sequel has already been ordered, because you and I don’t get to decide anything. — S.S. OUIJA Rated PG-13 A recent The New Yorker cartoon pointed out that Ouija boards are like texting for the dead. Here in Florida, we know

that the two are intimately connected: Text during a movie, and you soon may be dead. Text during this movie, and who knows what’ll happen, since it’s all about the malevolent forces that can be unleashed when one messes around with the supernatural world’s answer to the board game Sorry! Filmmaker Stiles White has you guessed it never directed a picture before, though he did write such genre entries as The Possession and Boogeyman. Such spectacular credentials! — S.S. NIGHTCRAWLER ***G Rated R Reviewed in this issue. REVENGE OF THE GREEN DRAGONS Rated R One part Hong Kong action flick and one part NYC crime thriller, Justin Chon and Kevin Wu star as two immigrant brothers in the 1980s who quickly rise up in the ranks of the Chinatown street gang The Green Dragons. Executive producer Martin Scorsese presents this gritty true story of revenge and hard-boiled action. — D.B. SAW 10th ANNIVERSARY Rated R If the likes of Ouija have left you wondering what happened to the good old days when we were guaranteed a new outing with Jigsaw and/or his progeny every single flippin’ Halloween, you’ll have to make do with this one-week-only rerelease of the indie experiment in torture porn that started it all. Return with us now to those thrilling days of yesteryear, when the promo materials for a Saw flick could actually carry the tag line “Straight from Sundance!” When we all looked at the Princess Bride poster hanging in our bedroom and thought, “OK, so maybe Cary Elwes can’t really act after all.” And when the entire graduating class at every film school everywhere peered out from behind its mountain of student-loan debt and declared “That I can do!” Gosh, it seems like just yesterday, not a full decade ago. In related news, I’m getting pretty fat. You? — S.S. ST. VINCENT **G@ Rated PG-13 Reviewed in this issue. A WALK AMONG THE TOMBSTONES **@@ Rated R If you’re a fan of Liam Neeson the badass, this one’s for you. He’s Matt Scudder, a retired detective, now working as an unlicensed private eye. Howie (Eric Nelsen), a drug addict Scudder met in AA, asks Scudder to help his brother Kenny (Dan Stevens) get revenge on the guys who kidnapped, raped and murdered Kenny’s wife. Scudder demurs, then accepts – because if he didn’t, the movie would be about something else. There are no twists, the intrigue is distracted by the unfocused story, and the suspense could be a lot chairgrippingly better. Immediately after Scudder takes the case, he starts investigating something that’s tangentially connected, making us wonder: 1) What the hell is he doing? and 2) Why did he take the case in the first place? It’s not for the money or the glory. — Dan Hudak

LISTEN UP PHILIP Unrated Jason Schwartzman stars as Philip Lewis Friedman, an angry, self-obsessed novelist waiting on the publication of his second book. Distracted by city life, and troubled by the state of his relationship with girlfriend Ashley (Elizabeth Ross), Philip readily accepts his hero Ike Zimmerman’s (Jonathan Pryce) offer to stay at a summer getaway, to get his head together and brood in peace and quiet. — D.B. INTERSTELLAR Rated PG-13 This science fiction epic from director Christopher Nolan (Memento, The Dark Knight trilogy) stars Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain, Ellen Burstyn and Michael Caine. After the discovery of a wormhole, which can theoretically connect widely separated regions of space and time, a group of scientists and explorers decide to travel through this uncharted territory to save mankind from a soon-to-be kaput planet Earth. But seriously, isn’t this whole “end of the world” thing something we would all like to see? It would really put your gluten allergies and yoga muscle strains into perspective. — D.B.

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Nicole Kidman lives a waking nightmare (no, not marrying Tom) in BEFORE I GO TO SLEEP.

A&E // ARTS Arnold Scaasi, Dress, spring 1982, tulle with applied felt, 53 15/16 inches.

Arnold Scaasi, Woman’s Dress, fall 1989, silk plain/satin weave; silk velvet, 54 1/4 inches.

Arnold Scaasi, D ress, fall 1982, silk plain weave, 57 7/8 inches.

Arnold Scaasi, Woman’s Ensemble in Three Parts, 1969, wool twill weave, cotton plain weave, 25 1/4 inches.

COMMON THREADS Icons of Style celebrates the visual appeal of the world of fashion

s fashion art? If you look at the definition of art — the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form — then yes, fashion counts. Yet some of the top fashion designers and critics, including Marc Jacobs, Coco Chanel, Miuccia Prada and Karl Lagerfeld, have openly opposed including fashion as a form of visual art. Whether you have an ongoing interest in contemporary fashion or simply enjoy the allure of beautiful objects, check out The Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens’ upcoming exhibition, Icons of Style: Fashion Makers, Models and Images. Organized by the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston, the show features 30 dressed mannequins with runway pieces by John Galliano for Dior, Karl Lagerfeld for Chanel, Olivier Theyskens for Rochas, Arnold Scaasi and Christian Lacroix, as well as photographs and original fashion illustrations. “Fashion is an art form on many levels,” says the Cummer’s chief curator, Holly Keris. “The brilliant creative spark of the designer, the act of translating that idea onto paper and then the artisan crafting it out of fabrics and beading.” Keris sees a strong corollary between the world of fashion design and the realm of visual arts. “There’s no difference between these acts and a photographer seeking the right light and best angle, a painter working through a composition,

a sculptor seeing a new form in more delicate than the canvas of a block of stone, or a landscape a painting.” ICONS OF STYLE: architect creating a new vista in Many of the dresses are FASHION MAKERS, perspective, color and texture creations by Arnold Scaasi, a MODELSAND IMAGES through plant material.” Canadian fashion designer who The Cummer Museum of Keris has been with the has created gowns for everyone Art & Gardens, Riverside, Cummer since 2003, and is from First Ladies Mamie cummermuseum.org. routinely in touch with the folks Eisenhower and Hillary Clinton The exhibit is on display at MFA Boston. She curated last to notable personalities such through Jan. 4. year’s Future Retro: The Great as Elizabeth Taylor, Mary Tyler Age of Moore and Ivana Trump. Scaasi the American Automobile got his start in the 1950s and enjoyed his heyday exhibition, which brought six throughout the next three decades. classic cars to the Cummer, “I was very excited to see the gowns emerge as well as art from Jean S. from their packing boxes. They are beautiful, and Frederick A. Sharf, from and their craftsmanship is amazing,” says Keris. “The only problem we ran into with this show the Massachusetts museum’s was that there wasn’t enough space. There’s never collection. enough space.” “I consider Icons of Style Keris, who earned her undergraduate degrees and Future Retro to be his in history and humanities from Stetson University and hers exhibitions,” Keris and a graduate degree in the history of art from the explains. “They both feature University of Virginia, admits she wasn’t exposed 2D drawings with 3D finished to the history or current practices of fashion during products. One focused on her studies, but still finds it an important aspect the art of automobile design of art. and one focuses on the art of “You can’t look at these gowns and not see the fashion.” design,” she says. “From the moment a designer is Presented in The Mason thinking about creating a garment to the execution, Gallery, the Cummer’s main fashion is certainly an art form.” gallery space, this is the final stop for Icons. The collection was shown last year at the Ringling The Cummer will host nearly a dozen special Museum of Art in Sarasota and the Nagoya/Boston events revolving around Icons of Style, including Museum of Fine Arts in Japan in 2012. Fashionable Jacksonville, featuring a talk, appetizers “There are three conservators from the and cocktails with local stylist Fitz Pullins on Nov. museum’s Textile and Fashion Arts Department 13, and a fashion photography lecture on Dec. 9. who travel with the show to dress the mannequins,” Kara Pound Keris says. “Some of these fabrics are equally if not mail@folioweekly.com

“From the moment a designer is thinking about creating a garment to the execution, fashion is certainly an art form.”

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29

A&E // ARTS “Unfortunately, these ladies were largely forgotten. That’s one of the reasons why I chose this play — to give them a voice.”

Decision Height WASP trainees (L to R): Katie Suddard as Eddie Harknell, Rylee Kuberra as Carol Henderson, Jillian Cicalese as Virginia Hascall. Below, with Rebecca Woods as Ziggie Lewis.

Photos by Kayla Lindsay

CORRECTED ALTITUDE The overlooked story of WWII female pilots is recounted in Flagler College’s latest stage production

t’s rehearsal night on the second floor of Flagler College’s Lewis Auditorium. More than a dozen girls are milling about the small theater space, giggling and commenting on each other’s outfits. Finally it’s decided: The girl wearing an orange high-waisted skirt and black-and-white striped top wins “Best Dressed.” In walks Elaina Wahl-Temple, an adjunct theater professor and the school’s resident costume designer. She settles comfortably into the front row, and it’s time to get down to business. Though Wahl-Temple’s been with the college for five years — teaching costume, dance and make-up courses — this is her directorial debut. “We have a very female-heavy department and I wanted to give the women a vehicle — something to sink their teeth in,” she says of choosing Decision Height, a play set to take the stage Oct. 31 through Nov. 2. “This one really stood out. It’s feminist, but by no means a manhater play. It’s about strength and equality.” Decision Height is set in Sweetwater, Texas, and tells the story of six Women’s Air Force Service Pilots (affectionately called WASPS) who flew aircraft during World War II. And while they didn’t see combat, the ladies were responsible for transporting planes and pulling targets for live ammunition training — freeing the men for active duty after the attack on Pearl Harbor. The WASPS proved an important asset for the military, but were largely forgotten in the history books. “The women all come from very different backgrounds and are put together in the same barracks,” says Wahl-Temple of the characters

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

in the play, who are based on both fictionalized and historically accurate accounts. “It’s about how they become friends and find support among one another.” In aviation lingo, decision height is a specified altitude at which a pilot must decide whether to land a plane or initiate a missed approach. The altitude varies based on an airport’s terrain, and it’s one of the most important decisions a pilot will train for. The play of the same name, which was written by Meredith Dayna Levy during her senior year at Hollins University and went on to win Best Full-Length Play 2013 in Region IV of the Kennedy Center American College Theatre Festival, has a centralized theme based on making tough decisions. Virginia Hascall, the main character of Decision Height, played in this production by Flagler College student Jillian Cicalese, has left her fiancé to train for the WASP program. She bonds with her fellow trainees, but is later forced by her fiancé to choose between returning home to him and continuing her mission to aid in WWII efforts. “There are ladies all throughout history that have gone above and beyond and had to make some really difficult decisions,” says TempleWahl. “Unfortunately, these ladies were largely forgotten. That’s one of the reasons why I chose this play — to give them a voice.” Decision Height is reminiscent of A League of Their Own, the 1992 film with Geena Davis and Tom Hanks that tells a fictionalized account of the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League during the 1940s — except instead of airplanes, the women were given bats and gloves. In this classic film, Davis must

also choose between her role as a wife and doing what she loves. It’s also an amalgam of the PBS documentary Fly Girls, which delves deeper into the history and details of the WASPS. As the film’s synopsis relates: “During WWII, more than a thousand women signed up to fly with the U.S. military. Wives, mothers, actresses and debutantes who joined the Women Airforce Service Pilots (WASPS) testpiloted aircraft, ferried planes and logged 60 million miles in the air. Thirty-eight women died in service. But the opportunity to play a critical role in the war effort was abruptly canceled by politics and resentment, and it would be 30 years before women would again break the sex barrier in the skies.” Flagler College’s rendition of Decision Height has a cast of 13 — all female and all college students. And though the play’s not considered a musical, it features anthemic marching tunes throughout. “It’s an ensemble piece,” says Wahl-Temple. “There’s really no one person that’s more important than another — much like the war effort and the heroic and difficult roles the WASPS played.” Kara Pound mail@folioweekly.com

DECISION HEIGHT 7:30 p.m. Oct. 31 and Nov. 1; 2 p.m. Nov. 2; $15, $10 for veterans Flagler College’s Lewis Auditorium, St. Augustine flagler.edu/theatre

A&E // ARTS & EVENTS

The Jacksonville Dance Theatre is featured in the SWAMP SHACK VOODOO BLUES SHOW at The Parlour Speakeasy, located in the Grape & Grain Exchange, on Oct. 31.

PERFORMANCE

SWAMP SHACK VOODOO BLUES SHOW The Parlour Speakeasy and Jacksonville Dance Theatre present this evening of dance performances, live music by The Snacks Blues Band, cocktails and a best Voodoo Queen/ Hoodoo Priest costume contest at 9 p.m. on Oct. 31 at the Grape & Grain Exchange, 2000 San Marco Blvd. (enter through the side door on Carlo St.), $20 cover includes “Creole Punch,” reservations recommended, 396-4455, jacksonvilledancetheatre.org. DECISION HEIGHT Meredith Dayna Levy’s play about a group of female pilots in WWII is staged at 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 31 and Nov. 1 and 2 p.m. on Nov. 2 at Flagler College’s Lewis Auditorium, 14 Granada Street, St. Augustine, 826-8600, $15; $10 for military, flagler.edu/theater. THE RED LINE Players By the Sea presents the world premiere of Joshua Kreis McTiernan’s play, about a paranoid man who believes that his girlfriend is cheating on him and his plan to publicly shame her, staged at 8 p.m. on Oct. 30 and 31 and Nov. 6, 7 and 8 at 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, 249-0289, $23; $20 for seniors, military and students, playersbythesea.org. ONE MAN, TWO GUVNORS Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre presents this celebration of British comedy, featuring satire, songs, slapstick and one-liners at 8 p.m. on Oct. 31 and Nov. 1, 7, 8 and 2 p.m. on Nov. 2 and 9 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-7177, $20, abettheatre.com. MURDER BY FRIENDS Orange Park Community Theatre stages this murder mystery about an aging vain actor, his very rich wife and doubledealing agent at 8 p.m. on Oct. 31 and Nov. 1 and 3 p.m. on Nov. 2 at 2900 Moody Ave., Orange Park, 276-2599, $15, opct.org. SWEENEY TODD Amelia Musical Playhouse presents Stephen Sondheim’s Tony award-winning musical about a murderous barber in 19th-century London at 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 31 and Nov. 1 at 1955 Island Walkway, Fernandina Beach, $20; $15 for students, 277-3455, ameliamusicalplayhouse.com. THE DROWSY CHAPERONE The play-within-a-play, staged at a 1928 Broadway theater, drops every theatrical cliché from musicals of the bygone era. It’s accompanied by a themed menu created by Executive Chef DeJuan Roy and runs through Nov. 23. Dinner at 6 p.m., curtain up at 8 p.m. Tue.-Thur., $49.95 plus tax; Fri. and Sat., $55 plus tax; brunch 11 a.m., show 1:15 p.m. Sat. and brunch at noon, show 2 p.m. Sun., $47 plus tax; at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. THE ROCKY HORROR SHOW This cult classic musical comedy about a young naïve couple who wind up in the castle of a transsexual scientist is staged at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 5, 6, 7 and 8 at 1955 Island Walkway, Fernandina Beach, 20; $15 for students, 277-3455, ameliamusicalplayhouse.com.

COMEDY

LAST COMIC STANDING LIVE TOUR Comedy finalists from the popular television show perform at 8 p.m. on Oct. 31 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., $40-$125, 209-0399, pvconcerthall.com. RICH GUZZI’s HYPNOTIC HALLOWEEN

This “mesmerizing” comedy show features audience participation (costumes encouraged!) at 8 p.m. Oct. 28-Nov. 1 at the Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $10$14, 292-4242, comedyzone.com. VINCE TAYLOR Known for his appearances on the BET Black College Tour, comedian Taylor appears at 8:30 p.m. on Oct. 31 at Bonkerz Comedy Club, bestbet, 455 Park Ave., Orange Park, $10 and $35, 646-0001, bestbetjax.com. DEAN NAPOLITANO Napolitano, who has appeared on television shows including The Shield and What About Brian, performs at 8:04 p.m. Oct. 30 and 31 and Nov. 1 and 25 and at 10:10 p.m. on Nov. 1 at the Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., $6-$15, 646-4277, jacksonvillecomedy.com. JAMES YON This host of Dish Network’s Viral Breakdown performs at 7:30 and 10 p.m. on Oct. 31 and at 7 and 9:30 p.m. on Nov. 1 at Latitude 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., Southside, 365-5555, latitude360.com. MAD COWFORD IMPROV Weekly PG-13-rated improv shows, based on audience suggestion, are held at 8:15 p.m. every Fri. and Sat. at Northstar Substation, 119 E. Bay St., Downtown, $5, 233-2359, madcowford.com. HOT POTATO COMEDY HOUR Local comics appear 9 p.m. every Mon. at rain dogs., 1045 Park St., Riverside, free, 379-4969. OPEN DOOR SUNDAYS Open mic night 9 p.m. every Sun. at Tapa That, 820 Lomax St., 5 Points, free, 376-9911, tapathat.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

JIM DRAPER WORKSHOP Acclaimed artist and environmentalist Jim Draper leads a two-day workshop that explores various techniques and perspectives on how to craft an image through direct observation, from 9 a.m.-4 p.m. on Nov. 8 and 9 at St. Augustine Art Association, 22 Marine St., 824-2310. Fee of $295 includes lunch for both days. Early registration is recommended. ORANGE PARK THEATRE AUDITIONS Orange Park Community Theatre holds auditions for The Toby Show at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 4 and 5. Available roles are for four women and three men, all ages 20s-50s; cold reading from script. Theater is located at 2900 Moody Ave., Orange Park, 276-2599, opct.org. WRITING CONTEST FOR STUDENTS Friends of the Library presents this writing contest for students, with the topic “Why must you learn to read well?” Typed submissions should be original prose only, with the following word counts: grades 4-5: 150-200; grades 6-8: 250-300 words; grades 9-12: 500-750. Winners receive cash prizes. Deadline is Dec. 15. Submissions can be mailed to Ponte Vedra Beach Library, P.O. Box 744, Ponte Vedra Beach, FL 32204, or submitted in person at 101 Library Blvd., Ponte Vedra Beach. friendspvlibrary.org. GARDENING AS ART LECTURES AT CUMMER Award-winning garden designer Jon Carloftis is featured in a lecture and luncheon from 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. and a lecture and whiskey sampling from 6:30-8:30 p.m. on Nov. 5 at The Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., Both events are $135, $125 for members; tickets purchased separately are $75, $65 for members, 356-6857, cummer.org.

SUNDAY PAINT DAY Free art classes are offered to children at 5 p.m. every Sun. at LIYF Clothing & Accessories, 2870 University Blvd. W., Lakewood, vegan and vegetarian snacks, free, 865-630-0358. VERBAL ESSENCE Open mic poetry and musical performances are held at 7 p.m. every Mon. at the Ritz Theatre & Museum, 829 N. Davis St., Downtown, free, 807-2010, ritzjacksonville.com. FIGURE DRAWING Live model figure drawing is offered at 7 p.m. every Tue. at The Art Center II, $5 for members, $10 for non-members, artists bring supplies. ACTEEN STAGE LAB Children in grades 6-12 learn street style and ambush theater 6:30 p.m. every Wed. at Limelight Theatre, $80 per session, 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org. AMATEUR NIGHT Musicians, singers, comedians and poets participate in an audience-judged competition based on Amateur Night at the Apollo, held at 7:30 p.m. every first Fri. at the Ritz Theatre & Museum, $6. ACTING & DANCE CLASSES The Performers Academy offers a variety of weekly acting and dance classes for children and adults at 3674 Beach Blvd., Southside, 322-7672, theperformersacademy.com. FLAMENCO LESSONS The Spanish Cultural Society of Northeast Florida offers weekly flamenco dancing classes. For more info, call 278-0173.

CLASSICAL, CHOIR & JAZZ

A TRIBUTE TO LATIN JAZZ Conrad Herwig and Ed Calle perform at 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 30 at UNF’s Robinson Theater, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, $8-$25, 620-2878, unf.edu. UNF PERCUSSION HALLOWEEN CONCERT Charlotte Mabrey and Ivan Trevino present this percussion ensemble-driven concert at 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 31 at UNF’s Robinson Theater, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, 620-2878, unf.edu. THE ST. AUGUSTINE ORCHESTRA The Oldest City’s symphony performs Beethoven’s Fidelio overture, featuring violin soloist Selah Welton, at 8 p.m. on Oct. 31 at The Lightner Museum, 24 Granada St., St. Augustine, $20; $5 students with ID, staugustineorchestra. org. MUSICAL STORYBOOKS The Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra presents this free concert for kids that combines a story with a string quartet at 11 a.m. on Nov. 1 at the Times-Union Center for the Performing Arts’ Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 Water St., Downtown, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org. COVER THE TOWN WITH SOUND Groups of musicians from Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra perform at 2 p.m. on Nov. 1 at The Cummer Museum of Art & Gardens, 829 Riverside Ave., and at 3 p.m. on Nov. 2 at Palms Presbyterian Church, 3410 S. 3rd St., Jacksonville Beach, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org. MAYSA Smooth jazz singer Maysa performs at 7 and 10 p.m. on Nov. 1 at The Ritz Theatre & Museum, 829 N. Davis St., Downtown, $28-35, 807-2010, ritzjacksonville.com. FRIDAY MUSICALE Soprano Maria Knapik and pianist Michel Brousseau perform works by Chopin at 3 p.m. on Nov. 2 at 645 Oak St., Riverside, 355-7584, fridaymusicale.com.

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31

A&E // ARTS & EVENTS

Violinist SELAH WELTON performs with the St. Augustine Orchestra at The Lightner Museum on Oct. 31.

UNF ORCHESTRA CONCERT Dr. Simon Shiao conducts the school’s orchestra at 6 p.m. on Nov. 2 at All Saints Episcopal Church, 4171 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 620-2878, unf.edu. BACK TO BASS-ICS The San Marco Chamber Music Society presents features bassist Kevin Casseday in a concert featuring works by Hoffmeister, Knific, Clearfield and Schubert at 7 p.m. on Nov. 2 at St. Mark’s Lutheran Church, 3976 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 731-1310, sanmarcochambermusic.org. FALL CHAMBER MUSIC WEEK Jacksonville University’s Chamber Ensembles perform at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 4 at Terry Concert Hall, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7386, arts.ju.edu. UNF STUDENT CHAMBER ENSEMBLES The college’s chamber music ensembles, coordinated by Dr. Simon Shiao, perform at 7 p.m. on Nov. 4 at the Main Library’s Hicks Auditorium, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 620-2878, unf.edu., jplmusic.blogspot.com. IRIDIUM SAXOPHONE QUARTET This brass-rich four piece performs at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 4 at UNF’s Recital Hall, 1 UNF Dr., Southside, 620-2878, unf.edu. SCOTT GIDDENS Pianist-organist Giddens performs standards and originals at 7:30 p.m. on Nov. 5 at Jacksonville University’s Black Box Theater, Philips 19, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7386, arts.ju.edu. JAZZ IN PONTE VEDRA The Gary Starling Group (Carol Sheehan, Billy Thornton, Peter Miles) performs 7:30-10:30 p.m. every Thur. at Table 1, 330 A1A N., 280-5515. JAZZ IN RIVERSIDE Trumpeter Ray Callendar and guitarist Taylor Roberts are featured at 9:30 p.m. every Thur. at Kickbacks Gastropub, 910 King St., 388-9551. JAZZ IN MANDARIN Boril Ivanov Trio plays at 7 p.m. every Thur. and pianist David Gum plays at 7 p.m. every Fri. at Tree Steakhouse, 11362 San Jose Blvd., 262-0006. JAZZ IN NEPTUNE BEACH Live jazz is featured 7:30-9:30 p.m. every Sat. at Lillie’s Coffee Bar, 200 First St., 249-2922. JAZZ IN ATLANTIC BEACH Guitarist Taylor Roberts is featured 7-10 p.m. every Wed. and

32 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Thurs. at Ocean 60, 60 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-0060, ocean60.com. JAZZ IN AVONDALE The Von Barlow Trio and Third Bass perform at 9 p.m. every Sun. at Casbah Café, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966. JAZZ IN ST. AUGUSTINE Live jazz is featured nightly at Rhett’s Piano Bar & Brasserie, 66 Hypolita St., 825-0502.

ART WALKS, FESTIVALS & MARKETS

COMMUNITY FARMERS & ARTS MARKET Homemade baked goods, preserves, local honey, crafts, sauces, yard art, hand-crafted jewelry and more are featured 4-7 p.m. every Wed. at 4300 St. Johns Ave., Riverside/ Avondale, 607-9935. DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts and crafts and local produce are offered 10 a.m.-2 p.m. every Fri. at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 353-1188. FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK The Downtown art walk, held 5-9 p.m. Nov. 5 and every first Wed. – this month’s theme is “Musical Masquerade” and features music by the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra and Jacksonville Symphony Youth Orchestra in Hemming Plaza – includes more than 13 live music venues, more than 13 hotspots open after 9 p.m. and 50 total participating venues, spanning 15 blocks in Downtown Jacksonville. downtownjacksonville.org. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local and regional art, local music and entertainment – featuring the Buddy Sherwood School of Dance, RickoLus, Tala and The Tom Bennett Band on Nov. 1 – food, artists and a farmers market are featured 10 a.m.-4 p.m. every Sat. under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com.

MUSEUMS

ALEXANDER BREST MUSEUM & GALLERY Jacksonville University, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7371, arts.ju.edu. Engaging Form, Work by John Oles

and Mika Fowler, is on display through Nov. 5. AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. 3rd St., Fernandina Beach, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. The children’s exhibit Discovery Ship allows kids to pilot the ship, hoist flags and learn about the history of Fernandina’s harbor. AMERICAN BEACH MUSEUM American Beach Community Center, 1600 Julia St., Fernandina Beach, 277-7960, nassaucountyfl.com/facilities. An exhibit celebrating the life and activism of MaVynee Betsch, The Beach Lady is currently on display. BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTORY PARK 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657, beachesmuseum. org. The exhibit Remembering Hurricane Dora: The 50th Anniversary runs through Nov. 23. Admission is free for members, $5 for nonmembers. CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., 356-6857, cummer.org. Award-winning garden designer Jon Carloftis is featured in a lecture and luncheon from 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. and a lecture and whiskey sampling from 6:30-8:30 p.m. on Nov. 5. The fashion-themed exhibit Icons of Style: Fashion Makers, Models, and Images is on display is on display through Jan. 4. A Commemoration of the Civil Rights Movement: Photography from the High Museum of Art is on display through Nov. 2. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org/~karpeles/ jaxfrm.html. Michael Cenci’s Wildlife and Nature Photography is on display through Oct. 29. The permanent collection includes many rare manuscripts. LIGHTNER MUSEUM 75 King St., St. Augustine, 824-2874, lightnermuseum.org. Curator-led monthly tours are featured at 10 a.m. every first Wed. Photographer Theresa Segal’s exhibit Undisclosed: Photographs from the Lightner is on display through Jan. 2. MANDARIN MUSEUM & HISTORICAL SOCIETY 11964 Mandarin Rd., 268-0784, mandarinmuseum.net. The exhibit The Maple Leaf, which features artifacts and information from the Civil War era, runs through December. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, 366-6911, mocajacksonville. com. The event “Los MOCAlacas” is a “Day of the Dead”themed celebration featuring seasonal foods, drinks, a dance performance, film screening and mask-making, and is held from 7-10 p.m. on Oct. 30. Tickets are $30; ages 21 and up. A meet-and-greet with artist Frank Oriti is featured from noon-3 p.m. on Nov. 2. The exhibits Get Real: New American Painting and Jason John Studio Experience are on display through Jan. 4. Express Your #Selfie shows off the works of Wolfson’s Children’s Hospital patients, through Nov. 30. The Juxtaposition exhibit of works by husband-and-wife team Larry Wilson and Laurie Hitzig is on display through Nov. 2. MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. The exhibit Odyssey’s SHIPWRECK! Pirates & Treasure features shipwreck treasures and is on display through March. Skies Over Jacksonville, a detailed live star show, is screened daily in the Planetarium at 2 p.m. WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME & MUSEUM 1 World Golf Place, St. Augustine, worldgolfhalloffame.org. Honoring the Legacy: A Tribute to African-Americans in Golf – an exhibit featuring photographs, audio, video and memorabilia from the late 1800s to the present – is featured in the WGHOF permanent collection.

GALLERIES

44 MONROE ART STUDIO & GALLERY 44 W. Monroe St., Downtown, Sirens & Stilettos and Lelani Leo’s Be aMUSEd are featured from 5-9 p.m. on Nov. 5. ADELE GRAGE CULTURAL CENTER 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-5828, coab.us. Recent works by Zadé Moore are on display through Oct. 31. AMIRO ART & FOUND 9C Aviles St., St. Augustine, 824-8460. Painter Matteo Neivert’s exhibit Roots runs through October. THE ART CENTER COOPERATIVE GALLERY 31 W. Adams St., Jacksonville, 355-1757, tacjacksonville. org. Kenny Balser is the featured artist for Oct. THE ART CENTER PREMIER GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. Print Matters: Making an Impression features works of various printmaking techniques; on display through Nov. 5. CAMPUS GALLERY FSCJ North Campus, 4501 Capper Road, Jacksonville, 6323310, fscj.edu/campus-life/art-galleries. An exhibit of contemporary fiber art is on display through Oct. 29. CoRK ARTS DISTRICT 2689 Rosselle St., Jacksonville, corkartsdistrict.tumblr.com. A Halloween party-fundraiser is held from 8 p.m.-2 a.m. on Oct. 31 and features live music, live mural painting, dancing, slasher films and craft beer. Admission is $10; $5 for BYOB. A portion of the proceeds will be used to landscape the CoRKyard. THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccvb.org. The opening reception for the Jacksonville Watercolor Society 2014 Fall Show and Artist of the Year Exhibition is held from 2-5 p.m. on Nov. 2 and both exhibits are on display through Nov. 25. The exhibit Fusion, featuring collaborative works by photographer Ann Kemp and glass artist Denise Murphy, is

on display through Nov. 7. FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928, firststreetgalleryart.com. An exhibit of new watercolor works by Robert Leedy is on display through Jan. 7. FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Road, Jacksonville, 535-7252, floridamininggallery.com. The closing reception for Hiromi Moneyhun’s Under the Rose is held 10 a.m.-6 p.m. on Oct. 31. The Get Out & Accessorize Trunk Show is featured from 6-9 p.m. on Nov. 1. FSCJ KENT CAMPUS 3939 Roosevelt Blvd., Jacksonville, 646-2300, fscj.edu/ campus-life/art-galleries. Nida Bangash’s exhibit I Am a Tree is on display through Nov. 18. GALLERY 1037 Reddi-Arts, 1037 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville, 398-3161. The exhibit 16 x 20 The Canvas Size, featuring works by Art Guild of Orange Park members, is featured through October. HASKELL GALLERY Jax International Airport, 14201 Pecan Park Road, 741-3546. Works by Amy Labonte are on display through Dec. 26. J. JOHNSON GALLERY 177 Fourth Ave. N., Jax Beach, 435-3200, jjohnsongallery. com. The exhibit Modulism, featuring works by Dolf James and Andrew Zimmerman, is on display through Nov. 7. PLUM GALLERY 9 Aviles St., St. Augustine, 825-0069, plumartgallery.com. New works by blown glass artist Thomas Long and painters Mary Lou Gibson and Sara Pedigo are featured during October. RITZ THEATRE AND MUSEUM 829 N. Davis St., Jacksonville, 632-5555, ritzjacksonville. com. The photography exhibit The Fine Art of Jazz showcases the impact of Kansas City jazz musicians and is on display through Jan. 7. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY 201 N. Hogan St., Ste. 100, Downtown, 438-4358, southlightgallery.com. The Fifth Anniversary Celebration takes place from 5-9 p.m. on Nov. 5 and features works by all 24 collaborative members, the Light Sensitive VI Senior Portfolio Show in the UNF ArtSpace, works by Sebastian Pierre in the guest gallery and live music by saxophonist Jarell Harris. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. The 13th annual Tactile Art Show for the blind is featured through Nov. 2. UNIVERSITY OF NORTH FLORIDA GALLERY 1 UNF Drive, Jacksonville, 620-2534. The exhibit Beyond the Degree, featuring works by UNF alumni including Ashley Maxwell, Devin Balara, Bobby Davidson, Corey Kolb, Staci BuShea, Zach Fitchner and David Nackashi, is on display through Dec. 12.

EVENTS

WRESTLING MATCH AT 1904 MUSIC HALL The World Wrestling Network and Kaiju Big Battel present the wrestling event Mutual Assured Destruction at 1:30 p.m. on Nov. 2 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 Ocean St., Downtown, $20. BRIAN KILMEADE BOOK SIGNING Fox & Friends host Brian Kilmeade gives a talk and signs copies of his bestselling book George Washington’s Secret Six: The Spy Ring That Saved the American Revolution at 4 p.m. on Oct. 31 at Books-A-Million, 9400 Atlantic Blvd., Southside, 805-0004. All proceeds of books sold at event will be donated to Wounded Warrior Project. COURSE ON JEWISH POSITIVE THINKING Rabbi Nochum Kurinsky presents the first lesson of a six-week course titled “How Happiness Thinks: Jewish Perspectives on Positive Psychology,” at 7 p.m. on Nov. 5 at Chabad at the Beaches, 521 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach, 543-9301. chabadbeaches.com. PRIVACY DISCUSSION AT FLAGLER Dr. Will Miller discusses “Privacy as a Human Right: The Panopticon Becomes Big Brother,” at 10 on Nov. 4 a.m. at Flagler College, 74 King St., St. Augustine, $5, 819-6282, flagler.edu. HAUNTED HISTORY TALK AT BEACHES MUSEUM The Whistle Talk series features Jamie Pearce, who discusses her books Historic Haunts Florida and Historic Haunts of the South, from 5:30-7:30 p.m. on Oct. 30 at Beaches Museum & History Park, 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach. Admission is free for members, $5 for nonmembers, 241-5657, beachesmuseum.org. FALLEN PATRIOTS FUNDRAISER The Melting Pot is hosting a charity fundraiser and raffle event for the Children of Fallen Patriots Foundation from 5-8 p.m. on Nov. 3 at 7860 Gate Parkway, Southside. Fifteen percent of every guest’s bill will benefit the foundation when guests mention the organization while making a reservation or on the night of the event. Raffle prizes include seven different multi-day vacation packages. 642-4900, fallenpatriots.org. NAO VICTORIA Tour a replica of the first Spanish tall ship to successfully circumnavigate the world, commanded by Ferdinand Magellan in the 16th century, 10 a.m.-6:30 p.m. Mon.-Fri., 10 a.m.-7 p.m. Sat. and Sun. through December at St. Augustine Marina, 111 Avenida Menendez, 824-1606, elgaleon.org.

DINING DIRECTORY To list your restaurant, contact your account manager or Sam Taylor at 904.260.9770 ext. 111 or staylor@folioweekly.com. DINING DIRECTORY KEY

$ = Less than $8 $$ = $8- $14 $$$ = $15- $22 $$$$ = $23 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted free FW Bite Club tasting. To join, go to fwbiteclub.com. 2014 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot Average Entrée Cost

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH, YULEE

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919, 29southrestaurant.com. F In historic downtown, Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional regional cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tue.-Sat.; D Mon.-Sat.; R Sun. BARBERITOS, 1519 Sadler Rd., 277-2505. 463867 S.R. 200, Ste. 5, Yulee, 321-2240, barberitos.com. Serving Southwestern fare; made-to-order burritos, tacos, nachos, quesadillas, handcrafted salsa. $$ BW K TO L D Daily BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F Southern hospitality in an upscale waterfront spot; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged bee f. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269, cafekaribo. com. F In a historic building, the family-owned spot offers worldly fare: veggie burgers, fresh seafood, madefrom-scratch desserts. Dine in or out on oak-shaded patio. Karibrew Pub offers beer brewed onsite. $$ FB K TO R, Sun.; L D Daily CIAO ITALIAN BISTRO, 302 Centre St., 206-4311, ciao bistro-luca.com. Owners Luka and Kim Misciasci offer fine dining: veal piccata, rigatoni Bolognese, antipasto. Specialties: chicken Ciao, homemade meat lasagna. $ L Fri., Sat.; D Nightly DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049, ameliaislanddavids.com. Fine dining in historic district. Fresh seafood, prime aged meats, rack of lamb served in an elegant, chic spot. $$$$ FB D Wed.-Mon. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 491-3469. 450077 S.R. 200, Callahan, 879-0993. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. ELIZABETH POINTE LODGE, 98 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-4851, elizabethpointelodge.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Award-winning B&B has seaside dining, indoors or out. Hot buffet breakfast daily. Homestyle soups, sandwiches, desserts. $$$ BW K B L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444, jackanddianescafe.com. F In renovated 1887 shotgun house. Jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, vegan/ vegetarian items. Dine in or on porch. $$ FB K B L D Daily LULU’S AT THOMPSON HOUSE, 11 S. Seventh St., 432-8394, lulusamelia.com. F Creative lunch: po’boys, salads, little plates. Dinner: fresh local seafood, Fernandina shrimp. Reservations. $$$ BW K TO R Sun.; L D Tue.-Sat. MARCHÉ BURETTE, 6800 First Coast Hwy., 491-4834, omnihotels.com. Old-fashioned gourmet food market/ deli, in Spa & Shops, Omni A melia Island Plantation. Continental breakfast; lunch features flatbreads. $$$ BW K TO L D Daily MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400, moonriverpizza.net. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Northern-style pizzas, 20+ toppings, by the pie or the slice. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MUSTARD SEED CAFE, 833 TJ Courson Rd., 277-3141, nassaushealthfoods.net. Snail of Approval. Casual organic eatery and juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juice, coffee, herbal tea. $$ TO B L Mon.-Sat. THE PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815, thepecanrollbakery.com. The bakery near the historic district has sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes, bagels, breads, all made from scratch. $ K TO B L Wed.-Sun. PLAE, 80 Amelia Village Cir., 277-2132, plaefl.net. Bite Club. Omni Plantation Spa & Shops. Bistro-style venue serves whole fried fish and duck breast. Outdoor dining. $$$ FB L Tue.-Sat.; D Nightly THE SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811, thesaltypelicanamelia.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. ICW sunset view; 2nd-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. and Al offer local seafood, Mayport shrimp, fish tacos, po’boys, original broiled cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652, slidersseaside.com. F Oceanfront place serves award-winning handmade crab cakes, fresh seafood, fried pickles. Outdoor dining, open-air 2nd fl oor, balcony. $$ FB K L D Daily TASTY’S FRESH BURGERS & FRIES, 710 Centre St., 321-0409, tastysamelia.com. In historic district. Fresh fast-food alternative, combining the freshest meats, handcut fries, homemade sauces, hand-spun shakes. $ BW K L D Daily

Head Chef Antonio Sanchez and owner Georgia T are served Greek salad, Iby's shrimp and Greek chicken soup at Athens Cafe, located off St. Augustine Road. Photo: Dennis Ho

T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. 8th St., 261-6310. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. This spot in an old gas station offers blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L Mon.-Sat. THE VERANDAH, 6800 First Coast Hwy., 321-5050, omnihotels.com. Extensive menu of fresh local seafood and steaks; signature entrée is Fernandina shrimp. Many herbs and spices are from onsite garden . $$$ FB K D Nightly

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 9119 Merrill Rd., 745-9300. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. LA NOPALERA, 8818 Atlantic Blvd., 720-0106. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., 724-5802. F SEE ORANGE PARK. THE SHEIK DELI, 9720 Atlantic Blvd., 721-2660. Familyowned-and-operated, Sheik delis have served our area for 40+ years, with a full breakfast (pitas to country plates) and a lunch menu. $ TO B L D Mon.-Sat.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

BAGEL LOVE, 4114 Herschel St., Ste. 121, 634-7253, bagellovejax.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Locallyowned-and-operated. Northern style bagels, cream cheeses, sandwiches, wraps, bakery items. Freshsqueezed orange juice and lemonade, coffee, tea. $ K TO B L Daily THE CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966, thecasbahcafe.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Middle Eastern/Mediterranean fare. Patio, hookah lounge, bellydancers. $$ BW L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATE, 3543 St. Johns Ave., 829-5790. F In Green Man Gourmet. Wines, spices, fresh fruit ice pops and Belgian chocolates. SEE PONTE VEDRA. $$ TO FLORIDA CREAMERY, 3566 St. Johns Ave., 619-5386. Premium ice cream, fresh waffle cones, milkshakes, sundaes and Nathan’s grilled hot dogs, served in Floridacentric décor. Low-fat and sugar-free choices. $ K TO L D Daily THE FOX RESTAURANT, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669. F Owners Ian & Mary Chase offer fresh diner fare: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes, desserts. Breakfast all day. Local landmark for 50+ years. $$ BW K L D Daily HARPOON LOUIE’S, 4070 Herschel St., Ste. 8, 389-5631, harpoonlouies.net. F Locally owned and operated for 20+ years, the American pub serves 1/2-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, pasta. Local beers. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA, 4530 St. Johns, 388-8828. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 Pine Grove Ave., 389-8655, pinegrovemarket.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. 40+ years. Burgers, Cuban sandwiches, subs, wraps. Onsite butcher cuts USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. $ BW TO B L D Mon.-Sat.

PULP, 3645 St. Johns Ave., pulpaddiction.com. SEE SAN MARCO.

RESTAURANT ORSAY, 3630 Park St., 381-0909, restaurantorsay.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. French/Southern bistro, with an emphasis on locally grown organic ingredients. Steak frites, mussels, pork chops. Snail of A pproval. $$$ FB K R, Sun.; D Nightly SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., 387-1000, simplysaras.net. F Down-home fare, from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Mon.-Sat., B Sat.

BAYMEADOWS

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 7825 Baymeadows Way, 733-4040. F SEE DOWNTOWN. AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F SEE BEACHES.

BROADWAY RISTORANTE & PIZZERIA, Ste. 3, 10920 Baymeadows Rd. E., 519-8000, broadwayfl.com. F Family-owned-and-operated Italian pizzeria serves calzones, wings, brick-oven-baked pizza, subs. $$ BW K TO L D Daily INDIA’S RESTAURANT, 9802 Baymeadows, Ste. 8, 620-0777, indiajax.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Authentic Indian cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L Mon.-Sat.; D Nightly LA NOPALERA, 8206 Philips Hwy., 732-9433. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 737-7740. 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 11030 Baymeadows Rd., 260-2791. SEE MANDARIN. PIZZA PALACE RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 527-8649, pizzapalacejax.com. F Casual, family-owned; homestyle cuisine. Local faves: spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Outside dining; HD TVs. $$ BW K TO L D Daily SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 8133 Point Meadows Dr., 519-0509. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. ZESTY INDIA, 8358 Point Meadows Dr., 329-3676, zestyindia.com. Asian methods meld with Europea n template to create tandoori lamb chops, rosemary tikka. Vegetarian items cooked separately in vegetable oil. $ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun.

BEACHES

(Locations are in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 249-0002, alspizza.com. F Al’s is often a repeat winner in F W readers’ poll. New York-style, gourmet pizzas, baked dishes. All-day happy hour Mon.Thur. $ FB K TO L D Daily ANGIE’S SUBS, 1436 Beach Blvd., 246-2519. ANGIE’S GROM, 204 Third Ave. S., 246-7823. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Angie’s has served subs made with the freshest ingredients for more than 25 years. One word: Peruvian. Huge salads, blue-ribbon iced tea. $ BW TO L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 2400 S. Third St., Ste. 201. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. BUDDHA THAI BISTRO, 301 10th Ave. N., 712-4444,

buddhathaibistro.com. The proprietors are from Thailand; every dish is made with fresh ingredients. $$ FB TO L D Daily BURRITO GALLERY EXPRESS, 1333 Third St. N., 242-8226. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE DOWNTOWN. CANTINA MAYA SPORTS BAR & GRILLE, 1021 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-3227. Popular spot serves great margaritas, great Latin food, burgers. Sports on TVs. $$ FB K L D Tue.-Sun. CASA MARIA, 2429 S. Third St., 372-9000, casamariajax.com. F Family-owned-and-operated place offers authentic Mexican fare: fajitas and seafood dishes, hot sauces made in-house. The specialty is tacos de asada. $ FB K L D Daily CULHANE’S IRISH PUBLIC HOUSE, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595, culhanesirishpub.com. Bite Club. Upscale pub/restaurant owned and run by sisters from County Limerick, Ireland. Shepherd’s pie, corned beef; gastropub fare. $$ FB K R Sat. & Sun.; L Fri.-Sun.; D Tue.-Sun. EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 853-5680, fl yingiguana.com. F Latin American fusion, Southwestern-influenced: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana sandwiches. 100+ tequilas. $ FB L D Daily HARMONIOUS MONKS, 320 First St. N., 372-0815, harmoniousmonks.net. F SEE MANDARIN. LA NOPALERA, 1222 Third St. S., 372-4495. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 N. Third St., 247-9620. F SEE ORANGE PARK.

LILLIE’S COFFEE BAR, 200 First St., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 249-2922, lilliescoffeebar. com. F Locally roasted coffee, eggs, bagels, fl atbreads, sandwiches, desserts. Dine indoors or out, patio and courtyard. $$ BW TO B L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600, mellowmushroom.com. F Bite Club. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Hoagies, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop happy hour. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 Third St. N., 853-6817. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 249-5573, mezzarest aurantandbar.com. F Near-the-ocean eatery, 20+ years. Casual bistro fare: gourmet wood-fired pizzas, nightly specials. Dine inside or on the patio. Valet parking. $$$ FB K D Mon.-Sat. MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636, mojobbq.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, Delta fried catfish, all the sides. $$ FB K TO L D Daily M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 241-2599, mshackburgers.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. David and Matthew Medure flip burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes, familiar fare, moderate prices. Dine inside or outside. $$ BW L D Daily NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 6, Atlantic Beach, 372-4105, nbbistro.com. Bite Club. Neighborhood gem with a chef-driven kitchen serves hand-cut steaks, fresh local seafood, tapas menu. Happy hour. $$$ FB K R Sun.; L D Daily OCEAN 60 RESTAURANT, WINE BAR & MARTINI ROOM,

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 33

GRILL ME!

DINING DIRECTORY

A WEEKLY Q&A WITH PEOPLE IN THE FOOD BIZ

Blvd., Ste. 12, 683-3773, redelephantpizza.com. F Casual, family-friendly eatery serves steaks, seafood, chicken grill specials. Five topping selections. Salads, sandwiches, pizza. Gluten-free friendly. $ FB K L D Daily STEAMIN, 9703 San Jose Blvd., 493-2020, eatsteamin. com. Classic diner serves steam burgers, fat dogs and chili, 50+ craft beers. $ FB TO B Sat.-Sun.; L D Daily

NAME: Ted Peters RESTAURANT: Azurea, 1 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach BIRTHPLACE: Connecticut

YEARS IN THE BIZ: 18

FAVORITE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Girl & the Goat, Chicago BEST CUISINE STYLE: Southern cuisine

ORANGE PARK, GREEN COVE SPRINGS

GO-TO INGREDIENT: Sea salt brings out a dish’s full flavor. IDEAL MEAL: Anything simply made with items from my family’s seasonal garden – we teach our kids about the food we grow and pick. WILL NOT CROSS MY LIPS: Shrimp – I’m allergic. INSIDER’S SECRET: Don’t overthink it. CELEBRITY SIGHTING: U.S. Soccer Team CULINARY TREAT: Azurea’s spiced pecans

Watch Every NFL & NCAAF Game Here! Happy Hour Mon - Fri 4pm-7pm $5 Appetizers, $3 Well Drinks 1/2 Price Drafts & House Wines

Mon

Half Price Pizza $6.95 Bud Lt Pitcher

tue

All Day Happy Hour & Half Price Appetizers

wed

thur

Team Trivia @ 7:30p 60¢ Wings Late Night Happy Hour 10pm-Close Half Price Pizza $2.50 Coronas $4.50 Loaded Coronas

fri

Team Trivia @ 6:3-pm $5 Pitchers of Long Islands and Margaritas 7pm-Midnight

sat

$5.99 Calzones $3.50 Mimosas & Bloody Marys

sun

60¢ Wings $3.50 Mimosas & Bloody Marys

VISIT 13779 BEACH BLVD. (HODGES PLAZA) LUNCH  DINNER  LATE NIGHT CALL FOR TAKE OUT 904.223.6999 TIMEOUTSPORTSGRILL.COM 34 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

60 Ocean Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 247-0060, ocean60.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Continental cuisine, fresh seafood, dinner specials and a seasonal menu in a formal dining room or casual Martini Room. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. RAGTIME TAVERN & SEAFOOD GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 241-7877, ragtimetavern.com. F For 30+ years, the iconic seafood place has scored many awards in our BOJ readers poll. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456, saltlifefoodshack.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Specialty items: signature tuna poke bowl, fresh rolled sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp, in a modern open-air space. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD GRILLE & OYSTER BAR, 218 First St., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 246-0881, slidersseafoodgrille.com. Beach-casual. Faves: Fresh fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, ice cream sandwiches. $$ FB K L Sat. & Sun.; D Nightly SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 111 Beach Blvd., 482-1000, sneakerssportsgrille.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. More than 20 beers on tap, TV screens, cheerleaders serving the food. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB K L D Daily TACOLU BAJA MEXICANA, 1712 Beach Blvd., 249-8226, tacolu.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Fresh, Baja-style fare with a focus on fish tacos, tequila (more than 135 kinds) and mezcal. Bangin’ shrimp, carne asada, carnitas, daily fresh fish selections. Made-freshdaily guacamole. $$ FB K R Sat. & Sun.; L D Tue.-Fri.

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324, akelsdeli.com. F New York-style deli offers freshly made fare: subs (3 Wise Guys, Champ), burgers, gyros, breakfast bowls, ranchero wrap, vegetarian dishes. $ K TO B L Mon.-Fri. BURRITO GALLERY & BAR, 21 E. Adams St., 598-2922, burritogallery.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Southwestern burritos, ginger teriyaki tofu, beef barbacoa, wraps, tacos. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. CASA MARIA, 12961 N. Main St., Ste. 104, 757-6411. F SEE BEACHES. CHOMP CHOMP, 106 E. Adams St., 762-4667. F Eats at moderate prices – most less than $10. Chef-inspired street food: panko-crusted chicken, burgers, chinois tacos, bahn mi and barbecue. $ L Tue.-Sat.; D Thur.-Sat. FIONN MacCOOL’s IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT, The Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547, fionnmacs.com. Casual dining with an uptown Irish atmosphere, serving fish and chips, Guinness lamb stew and black-and-tan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily OLIO MARKET, 301 E. Bay St., 356-7100, oliomarket. com. From-scratch soups, sandwiches. They cure their own bacon, pickle their pickles. Home to duck grilled cheese, seen on Best Sandwich in America. $$ BW TO B R L Mon.-Fri.

FLEMING ISLAND

GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 1915 East-West Pkwy., 541-0009. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE.

LA NOPALERA, 1571 C.R. 220, 215-2223. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198, whiteysfishcamp.com. F Real fish camp. Gator tail, freshwater catfish, daily specials, traditional fare, on Swimming Pen Creek. Tiki bar. Come by boat, motorcycle or car. $ FB K TO L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly YOUR PIE, 1545 C.R. 220, Ste. 125, 379-9771, yourpie. com. Owner Mike Sims’ concept: Choose from 3 doughs,

9 sauces, 7 cheeses, 40+ toppings. 5 minutes in a brick oven and ta-da: It’s your pie. Subs, sandwiches, gelato. $$ BW K TO L D Daily

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F SEE BEACHES.

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 14286 Beach Blvd., 223-0115. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 14333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 39, 992-1666. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Tamales, fajitas, pork tacos. Some La Nops have a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F SEE ORANGE PARK. TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL, 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5, 223-6999, timeoutsportsgrill.com. F Locally-ownedand-operated. Hand-tossed pizzas, wings, wraps. Daily drink specials, HDTVs, pool tables. Late-night menu. $$ FB L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

JULINGTON CREEK

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 525 S.R. 16, Ste. 101, 825-4540. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO. PIZZA PALACE, 116 Bartram Oaks Walk, 230-2171. F SEE BAYMEADOWS.

MANDARIN

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 12926 Gran Bay Pkwy. W., 880-2008. F SEE DOWNTOWN. AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F SEE BEACHES.

ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199. F Dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant). Greek beers. $$ BW L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. BROOKLYN PIZZA, 11406 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 288-9211. 13820 St. Augustine Rd., 880-0020. Brooklyn Special. Calzones, white pizza, homestyle lasagna. $$ BW TO L D Daily THE COFFEE BARD, 9735 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 13, 260-0810, thecoffeebard.com. New world coffeehouse has coffees, breakfast, drinks. $$ TO B L D Tue.-Sun. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10391 Old St. Augustine, 880-7087. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. GIGI’S RESTAURANT, 3130 Hartley Rd., 694-4300, jaxramada.com. In Ramada. Prime rib and crab leg buffet Fri. & Sat., blue-jean brunch Sun., daily breakfast, lunch and dinner buffets. $$$ FB B R L D Daily GILMON’S BAKERY, 11362 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 13, 288-8128, gilmonsbakery.com. Custom cakes, cupcakes, gingerbread men, pies, cookies, coffee, tea. $$ B L Tue.-Sat. HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 30, 880-3040, harmoniousmonks.net. F American-style steakhouse: Angus steaks, gourmet burgers, ribs, wraps. $$ FB K L D Mon.-Sat. KAZU JAPANESE RESTAURANT, 9965 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 35, 683-9903, kazujapaneserestaurant.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Wide variety of soups, dumplings, appetizers, salads, bento boxes, sushi, entrées, maki handrolls, sashimi. $$ BW TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA, 11700 San Jose Blvd., 288-0175. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Tamales, fajitas, pork tacos. Some La Nops have a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 11365 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 674-2945. F SEE ORANGE PARK. NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET & DELI, 10000 San Jose Blvd., 260-6950, nativesunjax.com. Natural, organic soups, sandwiches, wraps, baked goods, prepared foods, juices and smoothies. Juice, smoothie and coffee bar. All-natural, organic beers, wines. Indoor, outdoor dining. $ BW TO K B L D Daily THE RED ELEPHANT PIZZA & GRILL, 10131 San Jose

ARON’S PIZZA, 650 Park Ave., 269-1007, aronspizza. com. F Family-owned restaurant has eggplant dishes, manicotti, New York-style pizzas. $$ BW K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1540 Wells Rd., 269-2122. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Road, 272-5959, hilltop-club. com. Southern-style fine dining. Specialties: New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sat. LA NOPALERA, 9734 Crosshill Blvd., 908-4250. 2024 Kingsley Ave., 276-2776. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN.

LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove Springs, 284-7789, larryssubs.com. F For 30+ years, all over town, they pile ’em high and serve ’em fast. Hot/cold subs, soups, salads. $ K TO B L D Daily POMPEII COAL-FIRED PIZZA, 2134 Park Ave., 264-6116. Family-owned-and-operated, offering pizzas and wings made in coal-fired ovens. Espresso, cappuccino. $ BW TO L D Daily THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611, roadhouseonline.net. F For 35-plus years, Roadhouse has been offering wings, sandwiches, burgers, quesadillas; 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily THE SHEIK, 1994 Kingsley Ave., 276-2677. SEE ARLINGTON.

PONTE VEDRA, NW ST. JOHNS

AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A N., 543-1494. F SEE BEACHES. CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATE, 145 Hilden Rd., Ste. 122, 829-5790, claudeschocolate.com. Hand-crafted premium Belgian chocolate, fruits, nuts, spices. Cookies, popsicles. $$ TO DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 100 Marketside Ave., 829-8134, dickswingsandgrill.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. NASCAR-themed; 365 kinds of wings, halfpound burgers, ribs. $ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S SUBS, 830 A1A N., 273-3993. F SEE ORANGE PARK. PUSSER’S BAR & GRILLE, 816 A1A N., Ste. 100, 280-7766, pussersusa.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Bite Club. Innovative Caribbean cuisine features regional faves: Jamaican grilled pork ribs, Trinidad smoked duck, lobster macaroni & cheese dinner. Tropical drinks. $$ FB K TO L D Daily RESTAURANT MEDURE, 818 A1A N., 543-3797, restaurantmedure.us. Chef David Medure offers global flavors. Small plates, creative drinks, happy hour. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat.

RIVERSIDE, 5 POINTS, WESTSIDE

13 GYPSIES, 887 Stockton St., 389-0330, 13gypsies. com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Intimate bistro serves authentic Mediterranean peasant cuisine updated for American tastes, specializing in tapas, blackened octopus, risotto of the day, coconut mango curry chicken. $$ BW L D Tue.-Sat. AKEL’S DELI, 245 Riverside Ave., 791-3336. F SEE DOWNTOWN .

AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F SEE BEACHES.

BLACK SHEEP RESTAURANT, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793, blacksheep5points.com. New American fare has a Southern twist, made with locally sourced ingredients. Rooftop bar. $$$ FB R Sat. & Sun.; L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Stes. 1 & 2, 855-1181. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. F Small-batch, artisanal coffee roasting. Organic, fair trade. $ BW TO B L Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412. Made-fromscratch “Mexclectic street food,” tacos, nachos, glutenfree and vegetarian options. $ BW L D Daily. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 5972 San Juan, 693-9258. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. EDGEWOOD BAKERY, 1012 S. Edgewood Ave., 389-8054, edgewoodbakery.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. 66+ years, full-service bakery. Fresh breakfast, from-scratch pastries, petit fours, pies, cakes. Espresso, sandwiches, smoothies, soups. $$ K TO B L Tue.-Sat. EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 2753 Park St., 384-9999, europeanstreet.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. 130+ imported beers, 20 on tap. NYC-style classic Reuben and

BITE-SIZED

Best BBQ

IN JACKSONVILLE

Winner Best BBQ Jax Truckies 2014

2 Locations Serving You 4838 Highway Ave. (904) 389-5551

10771 Beach Blvd. (904) 996-7900

Photos by Caron Streibich

QUICK SIPS

Pulp specializes in smoothies, juices and other (mostly) healthy treats

(4.95 for the 16-ounce) is your best bet: It’s a pacious and modern, Pulp — which silky mix of soymilk, banana, creamy Nutella, recently opened a second location in the peanut butter and organic vanilla frozen historic Shoppes of Avondale — is ideal yogurt. for a quick sip on the go, a post-gym beverage At breakfast I’ve or a light lunch. If been to known to you’re in need of java, PULP order the Pulp Acai there’s also hot or 1962 San Marco Blvd., 3645 St. Johns Ave., Bowl ($7.25), packed iced Bold Bean coffee San Marco, Avondale with antioxidant(available in a variety 396-9222 rich frozen acai of preparations — berries blended with French press, hand your choice of milk then topped with crunchy drip, Turkish or moka pot) for $2.50 and an granola pieces and freshly cut strawberries, assortment of tea, organic beers and wines. bananas and blueberries. Honey drizzle This locally owned shop specializes in optional. Yes, please. smoothies, juices and acai bowls. And you won’t find refined sugar or any artificial Caron Streibich sweeteners here — just organic cane sugar, raw biteclub@folioweekly.com sugar, stevia, agave and local wildflower honey. facebook.com/folioweeklybitesized The good news is that while these healthy concoctions may not be calorie-free, they are delicious and loaded with vitamins and NIBBLES antioxidants. • San Marco’s V PIZZA is planning a Each sip is like doing a sit-up, right? second area location by the end of the Juices are concocted in front of your eyes year at 521 N. First St. in Jacksonville with massive juicers, smoothies whipped up Beach. in record time via high-powered VitaMix blenders, and the do-it-yourself frozen yogurt • HYPPO GOURMET POPSICLES is planning bar ($0.49 an ounce; no fro-yo in Avondale, a spot in Riverside’s Brooklyn Station sadly) with a plethora of toppings is self-serve, that’s expected to open in April 2015. making for a fun experience. My go-to juice is the brightly hued Green • SUPER FOOD TRUCK is partnering Energy ($6.50). I enjoy the sweetness of the with BREW in 5 Points to open a brickapples and carrots, spiciness from the fresh and-mortar eatery Downtown in the 11 ginger, tanginess from the lemon and earthy East Building at the corner of Main and boost from the spinach, parsley, kale and celery. Forsyth. It will open in four to six months. As for smoothies, the Nuts about Nutella OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 35

DINING DIRECTORY

pie, homemade soups. $$ B R L Daily MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. PIZZA PALACE, 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815. F SEE BAYMEADOWS.

PULP, 1962 San Marco Blvd., 396-9222, pulpaddiction. com. The juice bar offers fresh juices, frozen yogurt, teas, coffees, 30 kinds of smoothies. $ TO B L D Daily TAVERNA, 1986 San Marco Blvd., 398-3005, tavernasanmarco.com. Authentic Italian ingredients, seasonal local produce and meats on Chef Sam Efron’s menus. Regional craft beers, handcrafted cocktails. $$$ FB K TO R L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE

Natalie Fernandez and Edith Mondragon of Cantina Maya in Atlantic Beach show off two of the Mexican restaurant and sports bar’s specialties: tequila and buckets. Photo: Dennis Ho

other overstuffed sandwiches; salads, soups. Outside seating is available at some EStreets. $ BW K L D Daily GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474, thegrassrootsmarket.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. F The juice bar uses certified organic fruits and vegetables. 500+ craft/import beers, 250 wines, organic produce, humanely raised meats, plus a deli, as well as raw items, vegan, vitamins, herbs. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS ASIAN STREET FARE, 1001 Park St., 508-0342, hawkerstreetfare.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Based on fare of Asian street vendors, peddling authentic dishes from mobile stalls. Chefs here serve the best hawker recipes under one roof. $ BW TO L D Daily KNEAD BAKESHOP, 1173 Edgewood Ave. S. New from Bold Bean Coffee Roasters’ owners. Locally-owned, family-run bake shop specializes in made-fromscratch pastries, artisan breads, savory pies, specialty sandwiches, seasonal soups. $ TO B L Tue.-Sun. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794. 7895 Normandy, 781-7600. 5733 Roosevelt, 446-9500. 8102 Blanding, 779-1933. F SEE ORANGE PARK. METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., Ortega, 999-4600. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE SAN MARCO. MONROE’S SMOKEHOUSE BAR-B-Q, 4838 Highway Ave., 389-5551, monroessmokehousebbq.com. Monroe’s smoked meats include wings, pulled pork, brisket, turkey and ribs. Homestyle sides include green beans, baked beans, mac-n-cheese, collards. $$ K TO L Mon.-Sat.; D Fri. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434, mossfire.com. F Southwestern fish tacos, enchiladas. Happy hour Mon.-Sat. upstairs lounge, all day Sun. $$ FB K L D Daily O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB, 1521 Margaret St., 854-9300, obrothersirishpub.com. F Traditional shepherd’s pie with Stilton crust, Guinness mac-n-cheese, fish-n-chips. Patio dining. $$ FB K TO L D Daily THE SHEIK, 7361 103rd St., 778-4805. 5172 Normandy Blvd., 786-7641. SEE ARLINGTON. SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0049. F Beer (Bold City, Intuition), wine, pizza, hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ BW Daily SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888, sushicafejacksonville.com. Sushi variety: Monster Roll, Jimmy Smith Roll; faves Rock-n-Roll, Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu, teriyaki. Indoor or patio. $$ BW L D Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F SEE BEACHES. AVILES RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 32 Avenida Menendez, 829-2277, hiltonhistoricstaugustine.net. F Hilton Bayfront. Progressive European-flavored menu; madeto-order pasta night, wine dinners, chophouse nights, breakfast buffet. Sun. champagne brunch bottomless mimosas. $$$ FB K B L D Daily CARMELO’S MARKETPLACE & PIZZERIA, 146 King St., 494-6658, carmelosmarketplace.com. F NY-style gourmet brick-oven-baked pizza, fresh sub rolls, Boar’s Head meats, cheeses, garlic herb wings. Outdoor dining, Wi-Fi. $$ BW TO L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATE, 6 Granada St., 829-5790. In The Market. Wine and chocolate pairings, soft-serve ice cream, a coffee bar, fresh fruit ice pops, cookies. $$ TO THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655, thefloridianst aug.com. Updated Southern fare: fresh ingredients from area farms. Vegetarian, gluten-free. Fried green tomato bruschetta, grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D Wed.-Mon.

36 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., 824-8244, gypsycab.com. F A mainstay for 25+ years, Gypsy’s menu changes twice daily. Signature dish: Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. Sun. brunch. $$ FB R Sun.; L D Daily THE ICE PLANT BAR, 110 Riberia St., 829-6553, iceplantbar.com. Vintage-inspired (an old ice plant) in historic area. Farm-to-table menu uses locally sourced ingredients; hand-crafted drinks, house-made bitters, syrups. $$$ FB TO D Nightly MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova, 342-5264. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. PACIFIC ASIAN BISTRO, 159 Palencia Village Dr., Ste. 111, 808-1818, pacificasianbistro.com. F Chef Mas Lui creates 30+ sushi rolls; fresh sea scallops, Hawaiian-style poke tuna salad. Sake. $$-$$$ BW L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 321 A1A Beach Blvd., 217-3256, saltlifefoodshack.com. Best of Jax winner. SEE BEACHES. TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Place, 547-0240. Latin American fusion wine bar and restaurant offers traditional American fare with a Latin flair; sandwiches, too. $$ BW L D Tue.-Sun.

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

BENTO CAFE ASIAN KITCHEN & SUSHI, 4860 Big Island Dr., Ste. 1, 564-9494, bentocafesushi.com. Pan-Asian fare; Asian-inspired dishes: wok stir-fry to fire-grilled, authentic spices, fresh ingredients. Full sushi bar. $$ K FB TO L D Daily MOXIE KITCHEN + COCKTAILS, 4972 Big Island Dr., 998-9744, moxiefl.com. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Chef Tom Gray’s place features innovative contemporary American cuisine – seafood, steaks, pork, burgers, salads, sides and desserts – using locally sourced ingredients when possible. $$$ FB K L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000, mshack burgers.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

BASIL THAI & SUSHI, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190, basilthaijax.com. F Authentic dishes: Pad Thai, curries, sashimi, fresh sushi, daily specials. $$ FB L D Mon.-Sat. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1610 University Blvd. W., 448-2110. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 398-9500. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688, fusionsushijax.com. F Upscale sushi spot serves a variety of fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ K L D Daily THE GROTTO WINE & Tapas Bar, 2012 San Marco Blvd., 398-0726. F Artisanal cheese plates, empanadas, bruschetta, cheesecake. 60+ wines by the glass. $$$ BW Tue.-Sun. HAMBURGER MARY’S BAR & GRILLE, 3333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, 551-2048, hamburgermarys.com. Popular chain serves wings, sammies, nachos, wraps, entrées, specialty cocktails and … wait for it … burgers. $$ K TO FB L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1631 Hendricks, 399-1768. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE MANDARIN.

MATTHEW’S, 2107 Hendricks Ave., 396-9922, matthewsrestaurant.com. Chef Matthew Medure’s flagship. Fine dining, artfully presented cuisine, small plates, martini/wine lists. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. Reservations. $$$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701, metrodiner.com. F 2014 Best of Jax Winner. Original upscale diner in ’30s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot

360° GRILLE, Latitude 360, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555, latitude360.com. F Seafood, steaks, burgers, chicken, sandwiches, pizza. Patio, movie theater. $$ FB TO L D Daily AKEL’S, 7077 Bonneval Rd., 332-8700. F SEE DOWNTOWN.

ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. Longest-running dinner theater in America. Chef DeJuan Roy’s themed menus. Reservations recommended. $$ FB D Tue.-Sun. BARBERITOS, 4320 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., Ste. 106, 807-9060. SEE AMELIA ISLAND. BENTO CAFE ASIAN KITCHEN & SUSHI, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 11, 503-3238. SEE ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER. CASA MARIA, 14965 Old St. Augustine, 619-8186. SEE BEACHES.

DANCIN DRAGON, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888. This new spot features a BOGO lunch. Asian fusion menu. $$ FB K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE PONTE VEDRA. THE DIM SUM ROOM, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888, thedimsumroom.com. Shrimp dumplings, beef tripe, sesame ball. Traditional Hong Kong noodles, barbecue. $ FB K L D Daily EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE RIVERSIDE. HZ CAFE, 6426 Bowden Rd., Ste. 206, 527-1078. Healthy concept cafe serves juices, smoothies, traditional vegan and vegetarian meals and vegan and gluten-free meals and desserts. $ K TO B L Mon.-Fri. LARRY’S SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F SEE ORANGE PARK. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955. F Bite Club. 2014 Best of Jax Winner. SEE BEACHES. MONROE’S SMOKEHOUSE BAR B-Q, 10771 Beach Blvd., 996-7900, monroessmokehousebbq.com. SEE RIVERSIDE. PAPI CHULO’S, 9726 Touchton Rd., Ste. 105, 329-1763, ilovepapichulos.com. The brand new Tinseltown place offers fresh, simple, authentic Mexican street food, topshelf tequilas, specialty drinks. Kids eat free. $$ K FB L D Daily SEVEN BRIDGES Grille & Brewery, 9735 Gate Pkwy., 997-1999, 7bridgesgrille.com. F Local seafood, steaks, pizzas. Brewer Aaron Nesbit handcrafts ales, lagers. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Court, 854-0426, tavernayamas.com. F Bite Club. Char-broiled kabobs, seafood, wines, desserts. Belly dancing. $$ FB K L D Daily TOMMY’S BRICK OVEN PIZZA, 4160 Southside Blvd., Ste. 2, 565-1999, tbopizza.com. NY-style thin crust, brick-oven-baked pizzas (gluten-free), calzones, sandwiches fresh to order. Boylan’s soda. Curbside pickup. $$ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Court, Ste. 1, 551-5929, worldofbeer.com. F Burgers, tavern fare, sliders,flatbreads, German pretzels, hummus, pickle chips. Craft German, Cali, Florida, Irish drafts. Wines. $$ BW L D Daily

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

HOLA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100, holamexicanrestaurant.com. F Fajitas, burritos, enchiladas, daily specials. Happy hour; sangria. $ BW K TO L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner, 764-9999. SEE ORANGE PARK.

SAVANNAH BISTRO, 14670 Duval Rd., 741-4404. F Low Country Southern fare, taste of Mediterranean and French. Crowne Plaza Airport. Crab cakes, NY strip, she crab soup, mahi mahi. $$$ FB K B L D Daily THE SHEIK, 2708 N. Main St., 353-8181. SEE ARLINGTON. UPTOWN MARKET, 1303 Main St. N., 355-0734, uptownmarketjax.com. Bite Club. In the 1300 Building. The market features fresh quality fare, innovative breakfast, lunch and dinner; farm-to-table selections, daily specials. $$ BW TO B L Daily

ASTROLOGY

ILLICIT FRIED CHICKEN, WALTER WHITE & SPARKLY GANG-BANGERS ARIES (March 21-April 19): If you live in Gaza, you don’t have easy access to Kentucky Fried Chicken. The closest KFC is 35 miles away in Egypt. But there was a time when you could pay smugglers to bring it to you via underground tunnel. Each delivery took four hours and required the help of two taxis, a handcart and a motorbike. (Alas, Egypt destroyed most of the tunnels in early 2014.) I recommend that you be as determined and resourceful to make your longed-for connections as the KFC lovers in Gaza were. Halloween costume suggestion: smuggler, bootlegger, drug-dealer, black-marketeer. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): It’s urgent that you expand your options. Your freedom of choice can’t lead you to where you need to go until you have more possibilities to choose from. In fact, you’re better off not making a decision until you have a wider selection. To drive home this point to your subconscious mind, this Halloween consider disguising yourself as a slime mold. This unusual creature comes in more than 500 different genders, at least 13 of which must collaborate to reproduce. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In an episode of the animated sci-fi TV sitcom Futurama, Leela, the mutant spaceship captain, develops an odd boil on her hindquarters. It has a face and can sing. The actor who provides the vocals for the animated boil’s outpouring of song is Gemini comedian Craig Ferguson, whose main gig is serving as host of a late-night TV talk show on CBS. Telling you this tale is my way of suggesting that you consider going outside your usual niche, as Craig Ferguson did, to offer your talents in a different context. Halloween costume suggestion: Kim Kardashian as a nurse wearing Ebola protective gear; science educator Neil deGrasse Tyson as a male stripper. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Native American hero Sitting Bull (1831-1890) was a renowned Lakota chief and holy man. He led his people in their resistance to the U.S. occupation of their land. How did he become so strong and wise? In large part through the efforts of his doting mother, whose name was Her-Holy-Door. Let’s install her as your exemplar for now. May she inspire you to nurture beauty and power in those you love. May she motivate you to be adroit as you perform your duties in service to the future. May the mystery of her name rouse you to find the sacred portal that ushers you to your next big gift. Halloween costume suggestion: a sacred portal, a divine gateway, an amazing door. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): This is one of those rare times when it’s OK for you to just throw out the dirty dishes that you are too lazy to wash. It’s also permissible to hide from a difficult person, spend money on a supposedly foolish indulgence, binge-watch a TV show that provokes six months’ worth of emotions in a few hours, and lie in bed for an extra hour fantasizing about sex with a forbidden partner. Don’t make any of these things habits, of course. But for now, it’s probably healthy to allow them. Halloween costume suggestion: total slacker. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Our evolutionary ancestors Homo erectus loved to eat delicious antelope brains. The fossil evidence is all over their old stomping grounds in East Africa. Scientists say that this delicacy, so rich in nutrients, helped our forbears build bigger, stronger brains themselves. These days it’s harder but not impossible to make animal brains part of your diet. The Chinese and Koreans eat pig brains, and some European cuisines include beef brains. I’m confident, however, that your own brain will be functioning better than ever in the coming weeks, even if you don’t partake of this exotic dish. Be sure to take advantage of your enhanced intelligence. Solve tough riddles! Think big thoughts! Halloween costume suggestion: a brain-eating Homo erectus.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “The egromenious hilarity of psychadisical melarmy, whether rooted in a lissome stretch or a lusty wobble, soon defisterates into crabolious stompability. So why not be graffenbent?” So said Noah’s ex-wife Joan of Arc in her interview with St. Crocodile magazine. Heed Joan’s advice, please, Libra. Be proactively saximonious. I’M KIDDING! Everything I just said was nonsense. I hope you didn’t assume it was erudite wisdom full of big words you couldn’t understand. In offering it to you, I was hoping to immunize you against the babble and hype and artifice that may soon roll your way. Halloween costume suggestion: a skeptic armed with a shock-proof bullshit-detector. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In AMC’s famous TV drama, a high school chemistry teacher responds to his awful luck by turning to a life of crime. The show’s title, Breaking Bad, refers to what happens when a good person cracks and veers over to the dark side. So then what does “breaking good” mean? Urbandictionary.com defines it like this: “When a criminal, junkie, or gang-banger gets sweet and sparkly, going to church, volunteering at soup kitchens, and picking the kids up from school.” I’m concerned that you are at risk of undergoing a similar conversion. You seem so nice and kind and mild lately. I guess that’s fine as long as you don’t lose your edge. Halloween costume suggestion: a criminal with a halo, a sweet and sparkly gang-banger, a Buddhist monk junkie. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): I’ve got two possible remedies for your emotional congestion. You might also want to make these two remedies part of your Halloween shtick. The first remedy is captured by the English word “lalochezia.” It refers to a catharsis that comes from uttering profane language. The second remedy is contained in the word “tarantism.” It means an urge to dance manically as a way to relieve melancholy. For your Halloween disguise, you could be a wildly dancing obscenity-spouter. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You are at a point in your astrological cycle when you deserve to rake in the rewards that you have been working hard to earn. I expect you to be a magnet for gifts and blessings. The favors and compliments you have doled out will be returned to you. For all the strings you have pulled on behalf of others’ dreams, strings will now be pulled for you. Halloween costume suggestion: a beaming kid hauling around a red wagon full of brightly wrapped presents. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Two physicists in Massachusetts are working on technology that will allow people to shoot laser beams out of their eyes. For Halloween, I suggest that you pretend you have already acquired this superpower. It’s time for you to be brash and jaunty as you radiate your influence with more confidence. I want to see you summon reserves of charismatic clout you haven’t dared to call on before. Costume suggestion: The X-Men mutant named Cyclops or the legendary Native America creature known as the thunderbird, which emits lightning from its eyes. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The African nation of Swaziland has passed a law prohibiting witches from flying their broomsticks any higher than 150 meters above ground. That will be a big problem for Piscean witches. There is currently an astrological mandate for them to swoop and glide and soar as high and free as they want to. The same is metaphorically true for all Piscean non-witches everywhere. This is your time to swoop and glide and soar as high and free as you want to. Halloween costume suggestion: high-flying witch, a winged angel, the Silver Surfer, or a mythic bird like the Garuda. Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

HELLO, YOUNG LOVERS (aka ISU writers): The limit for ISU notices is 40 words ONLY. No messages with more than 40 words will be accepted. Please keep your message short & sweet. Thanks! RUNNING SHIRTLESS You: It was around 6:20, you were running through Memorial Park. Caught me checking you out. Me: Wearing the blue shirt. We smiled, I watched you run off – quite a sight. We need to run together. When: Oct. 22. Where: Memorial Park. #1420-1029

BLACK GUY, ORANGE SHIRT, BOOTS You: Handsome, dark skin, orange shirt, behind me in Walmart money center line, 2 p.m. Me: Tall, curvy, tattooed blonde talking to couple ahead of you. Too shy to stay, thought I saw you looking. Meet? When: Sept. 12. Where: Kingsland Walmart. #1409-0917

DARK CHOCOLATE POM I came in for a few things. You had one in your bathroom. Something rang up wrong. Offered you chocolate, you told me I was sweet. You seemed earthy. Wonder if you’d like to grab coffee/tea sometime. When: Oct. 21. Where: Your Work, Ponte Vedra Beach. #1419-1029

COFFEE HOTTIE You: Hottest girl at Bold Bean, skintight Lululemons, bedhead and full-sleeve Molly Hatchet tattoo. You caught my glance waiting for latte. Me: Still drunk from last night, looking fine in Jesus Is The Shit shirt. We MUST meet. When: Sept. 10. Where: Bold Bean. #1408-0917

LOOKING FOR ME? You: Taco Tuesday, brunette, blue top, shorts, black flats. Saw you in line looking back. Caught each other’s gaze too long. Me: Blue button up, gray slacks. You met with guy, didn’t seem into him. Wanna see if I’m more interesting? When: Oct. 14. Where: Tijuana Flats, Baymeadows. #1418-1022

HOT BLONDE @ UPS STORE You: Girl at Claire Lane/San Jose Boulevard UPS store. Me: Handsome Latino courier who comes in twice a month to pick up a customer’s mail. You know who I am. If single, wanna chat? When: Sept. 8. Where: UPS Store. #1407-0917

INSTANT CONNECTION You: Tall, Purple hair, BRS shamrock on the back of your neck, wearing Capris, flip flops. Me: Short, dark curly hair, also wearing Capris, flip flops. You gave me a cigarette, I gave you my life story. When: Sept. 1, 2012. Where: Kristin’s House. #1417-1015 HUSKY SEMINOLES HUNK You: FSU shirt, name starts with S. Sloppy drunk & jolly. Me: Thick woman, Cornhuskers shirt. You loved my curly hair; let me rub your belly :) Bono’s unlimited BBQ rib night on Gate Parkway 7 p.m.? When: Oct. 4. Where: Kickbacks, Riverside. #1416-1008 SHORT-HAIRED BRUNETTE You: Short brown hair, sitting next to an older lady. You were with a party sitting by the door. I ended up talking to your friend but not you. Me: Black dress with dark hair at the bar. When: Sept. 27. Where: Hamburger Mary’s. #1415-1008 SO SWEET, BOUGHT TEA You: Tanned, green sunglasses, white SUV, motorcycle, OTW to pick up daughter. Me: Crazy spinner girl, parched, much appreciative of tea you bought. See you almost daily. Got your name, should’ve gotten number. A drink sometime? When: Sept. 27. Where: Monument/McCormick McD’s. #1414-1001 ROGUE MEN You helped me with ring toss. Stood really close. Had to run, had friends waiting. Wish I’d gotten your name and number! When: Sept. 7. Where: Dive Bar. #1413-1001 BEARD MAGIC You: Jet-black hair, green eyes, sexy red Fiat 500. You said my beard had magical powers. Me: Colorful tats, magical beard, Donkey Bong shirt. I gave you my toast and you promised a date. When and where? When: Sept. 15. Where: Brew 5 Points. #1412-1001 BARISTA WITH DEVILED EGGS You: Starbucks Barista. Handed me a deviled egg, drew a heart on my vanilla milk. Never knew what I loved about this old coffee shop. Close your tally with a herringbone? Love to read more newspapers – as your girlfriend. When: Aug. 14. Where: Southside/Baymeadows Starbucks. #1411-0924 SAUSAGE CUTIE You: Fast-talking Penguin shirt guy, recently out of jail; said three months in jail builds character. Me: Tall, jet-black hair, way-too-short dress. I asked if you knew I wasn’t wearing panties; you joked about sausage size on pizza. Pizza soon? When: Sept. 17. Where: Avondale Mellow Mushroom. #1410-0924

FLIRTING WHILE DRIVING? You: Dark Dodge pickup, Gator plate. Me: Old red Jeep Cherokee. Passed each other – intentionally – on bridge; smiles, waves. You’re cute! I was late, or would’ve followed. Wanna slow down and say hi? When: Sept. 3. Where: Buckman Bridge. #1406-0917 DESPERATELY SEEKING PIXIE You: Steampunk girl on red couch. You asked if I’d ever be done. Me: In black, too workfocused to speak to you properly. I’m done; ready. Need to find each other. Let’s meet, talk, try to forgive. RAM 10 a.m. find me. I’ll go until I see you. When: Aug. 23. Where: Royal. #1405-0917 HOT COP AT LOGAN’S ROADHOUSE ISU at Logan’s. You: slightly seasoned gentleman; ordered a juicy steak, but I wish I could have ordered yours. Oh, and Momma has a coupon for you! When: Aug. 29. Where: Logan’s Roadhouse. #1404-0910 BMW RIDER ISU 18 years ago. Your cute dimples, warm smile and sexy moustache won my heart. Interested in a lifetime of fun? If so, let’s par-tay! Happy anniversary, Love, Your Nag. When: May 1994. Where: Famous Amos. #1403-0910 STUNNING BLONDE NURSE Talked; bought you a drink upstairs. We seemed to connect. You showed me your driver’s license because I didn’t believe your age. Wish I’d written your name down; really want to talk. When: Aug. 22. Where: Salt Life St. Augustine. #1402-0827 PURPLE SCRUBS SAN MARCO You took my blood pressure, started asking me some questions, then a young doctor walked in. We started laughing at the tag-team questionnaire. I commented on your long hair. When: Aug. 19. Where: Academic Dermatology. #1401-0827 MR. CHEVY EQUINOX ISU wearing scrubs, driving an Equinox. I wore shorts, tank top; driving a black Chevy Tahoe, heading out of town for work. You asked about the Tahoe, what I did for a living. Love to chat more! When: Aug. 19. Where: Town Center Shell. #1400-0827 MEET FOR BEER You: Handsome guy, Yankee Coffin Co. T-shirt, jeans, behind me at register; our eyes met. Me: Curly blonde, jeans. Said hello as you left on motorcycle with I assume your son. If not single, no reply; you looked nice. When: Aug. 17. Where: European Street Jax Beach. #1398-0827 HOLDING AN UMBRELLA You: Sweet, standing under shelter helping people to cars during a thunderstorm. Me: Redhead desperate for shelter from the storm. You asked me what I did. You work at insurance agency. Call if you’d like to share your umbrella. When: Aug. 14. Where: Thrasher Horne Center. #1397-0820

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37

NEWS OF THE WEIRD FASHION FORWARD

The Osiligi Maasai Warrior choir, from Kenya, in ornate, mystifying native costumes and uncalledfor headdresses, happened to be touring the U.K. this fall, coinciding with the recent Paris Fashion Week in which the most celebrated designers from the “developed” world exhibited their wares, which often seemed as excessive as the Maasais’. Examples: Rei Kawakubo’s “Blood and Roses,” a red KKK-type swaddling robe with face-obscuring, pointy hood. Sarah Burton’s skirt of oversized petals, accessorized with skull cap and chin strap. Junya Watanabe’s dress with huge plastic puff sleeves of red and blue — and vinyl see-through helmet. Julie de Libran’s gown with earmuff-like chest coverings. The week ended with a street march of “Chanel girls” (most Caucasian) dressed as garishly as the African Maasais.

GO HOME, HANOVER, YOU’RE DRUNK

The Rural Municipality of Hanover, Manitoba, has prohibited alcohol sales for more than a century — or at least that’s what everyone in the community believed as recently as 2006, when the last attempt was made to repeal the ban (and failed by 30 votes). However, town officials finally decided recently to research the prohibition (examining records back to 1880) and in July revealed, astonishingly, that no city bylaw exists making the town dry. At least one restaurateur is expected to start serving booze soon.

PISTOL ENVY

In October in Gresham, Oregon, a 21-year-old man openly carrying a handgun he had just bought that same day was robbed, at gunpoint. According to the police report, the robber apparently thought the victim’s gun was nicer than his own: “I like your gun. Give it to me.”

BLOOD FOR BUTTERCUP

In September, Dr. Sean Perry of the Marathon (Florida) Veterinary Hospital saved the life of Buttercup, an orange tabby who needed blood — by giving him a transfusion from a West Palm Beach dog blood bank. According to the U.S. National Library of Medicine, 62 cats have been known to receive such “xenotransfusions,” and cats are

FOLIO WEEKLY PUZZLER by Merl Reagle. Presented by

apparently the only animals (besides dogs) that can safely process dog blood.

SAN MARCO 2044 San Marco Blvd. 398-9741

ROUTINE CLAIMS

When a van on official business for the city of St. Paul, Minnesota, accidentally hit Megan Campbell’s Nissan Pathfinder in August, Campbell, naturally, filed a claim against the city for the $1,900 damage — normally just a cost of business for a city and one of about 400 claims St. Paul has processed this year. However, the van happened to be driven by the same Megan Campbell, an employee of St. Paul Parks and Recreation, who apparently could not avoid hitting her own parked SUV. At press time, the city was investigating but expected to handle the claim as routine.

SPOUSAL SUPPORT

Pauline Chai and her estranged husband, Khoo Kay Peng (a Laura Ashley executive), are battling in a London courtroom in a very expensive divorce, with the current issue to determine whether the English judge has jurisdiction instead of courts in the couple’s native Malaysia. In the course of bringing the British judge up to date, Chai casually described how she has supported her husband’s relentless nature — by revealing that he would do copious amounts of work (for four hours at a time) at home while sitting on the toilet. Khoo “got backache there,” she said, “so I got the idea of (a) padded toilet seat” for him.

NAILED IT

After days of looking weary and walking lopsidedly, “Ducka,” the pet muscovy, finally gave owner Vicki Hicks of Sydney, Australia, a clue to its behavior by coughing up a nail. Veterinarian Hamish Baron of the Avian Reptile and Exotic Animal Hospital ordered an X-ray, which revealed a small toolbox’s worth of nails, screws and washers in Ducka’s belly. The items had to be removed, one by one, in surgeries totaling five hours. Dr. Baron told Sydney’s Daily Telegraph in October that though birds are attracted to shiny objects, Ducka’s case was severe. Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

PONTE VEDRA

THE SHOPPES OF PONTE VEDRA

330 A1A North 280-1202

82 85 86 88 91

Horrors! 1 4 10 13 17 19 20 21 22 24 25 26 27 28 30 34 35 36 41 45 48 49 50 53 55 56 57 59 62 63 65 69 70 71 72 76 80 81 1

ACROSS

It stole a Hearst in ’74 Jokingly Will Smith biopic Not quite dry Ending for Louis Boys/boys insert Actress Lena Dies ___ TV horror host with a hypo? Campus mil. group Shoebox number Perrier rival Some duct contents Horror host with a “shrubhuman” mentality? Horror host with fangs and a gun? Order to a dog (Go to 70 Across) Horror host with a peek-a-boo evil eye? Razor brand First Arabic letter Border order Danish money Horror host with a shovel and a brother named Rob? Alaska city Bonn was its cap. Playwright Fugard 1945 film, “Leave ___ Heaven” Mrs. McKinley et al. ___-Cone Seafood topper, ___ sauce Horror host in a lab coat who works for the city? Tokyo, once With 35 Across, a type of attitude Farm female Horror host who’s a swinger? Suppresses Significant span Neill and Nunn 2

93 96 98 99 100 103 105 106 113

117 118 119 120 121 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131

AVONDALE 3617 St. Johns Ave. 10300 Southside Blvd. 388-5406 394-1390

Ex-Twin Tony Jacket style Spells of anger Salsa rating Horror host who’s so suave it’s frightening? Lazy Hi’s wife Plato’s portico Book after Joel Horror host with big hair? Santa ___ winds Makes a getaway Horror host who has “visions”? Horror host who always seems to have a great weight on his shoulders? * Place to stay Other, in Orly Grumpy guy Black, in verse Horror hosts nowadays, no pun intended? Routine things? They’re high but not dry “___ worries ...” (Faith Hill lyric) Emulated Faith Hill Bauxite et al. Nightmarish street of filmdom Got more out of NASA’s creator

1 Audiotape’s other half 2 Insect stage 3 “___ came to pass ...” 4 Reaction to puppies 5 Sis or bro 6 Dole out 7 Mitt 8 On the train 9 H.S. proficiency test 10 Plenty 11 Chinese fruit 12 Under control 13 Reject 5

51 52 54 58 60 61 64 66 67 68 70 S I D E B

L A R V A

A N D I T

A D A M

T O T O

R U H R

B E F O G

A R I T H

R A T I O

P O G O

A G A R

U R G E

86 93

54 59

100

P E E L

A N G S C T E T S E H R A A M

K E E N E

E R R O R

O R N O

N U T S

T R E N D

S E D G E

O U R S

S T E A D

62 68

91 97

101

77 85

92 98

102 106

113 114 115

S E W I N Y G A N A G H A G B O D

M A Z E

105

A P E S

A R I Z

88 94

H E A R

D I S A L L O W

81 87

D I S C K E Y R A I R

I N C H E C K

O R T H O

A L O T

S E T

L I T W C O H M N I A O N M E I D G A N S A N D E T L I V A S C A R S T O S A MO U R I N N D Y I N G O T N E U S E O R I N O C O

S T O I C

G E D

57 64

A B O A R D

97 101 102 104 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 121 122 123

Envelop in mist Elem. sch. subj. Pi, for one Mulling sound Put-on “Yes ___?” Party snacks Big tub Let out ___ (bellow) Lacking spirit Eases up on Kitchen gadget Yin’s opposite Simple headstone 1980s attorney general Diver’s milieu? Author Allende Teeny bit Obsessed captain “___ it looks good” Groups of troops Pair’s possessive Place Current fashion Marsh plant Kelly’s possum Petri dish gelatin Hankering Go hither and yon What a flat lacks Uptown dir. in NYC Pluto, forward or backward

36 45

A S A G A W I L L R EWB L O A N O V MO N S T E S E E A A L I F G G R A V E O L H E R N A Y M E D O WA R Y D H A T S A M S S M I L O S E L O U L D I L O L A M S S L B E A R E E E B O N S S E A S S E L M

72 73 74 75 77 78 79 83 84 87 89 90 92 94 95

Solution to Cliché Couples, Revisited

38 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014

Home of the D’backs Rat’s challenge Shed a sunburn Mr. Khachaturian Electric-eel river Slugger Slaughter George Eliot, e.g. Get the news Like some misses Psalms interjection Harden “Pay it ___” Inner turmoil New Hampshire city Proof goof First to arrive? Baum tale barker German river Done for “___ got it!” Math guy with a famous “last theorem” Nosy “Bewitched” neighbor Imperturbable McBain and McMahon Intro to “pedic” Palookas Work done in circles Sci-fi sage Some Scots Monkeyshines So on, in Latin Had the flu, e.g.

14 15 16 18 20 23 28 29 31 32 33 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 46 47

AVENUES MALL

DOWN

4 18

SOUTHSIDE

99 103

104

107 108

116

109 110 111 112

117

119

120

121

124

125

126

128

129

130

118 122 123 127 131

HELP WANTED FULL TIME BOOTH RENTAL Blow Out Hair and Color Specialists Studio, is seeking a full time talented and experienced hair stylist with existing clientele to become part of our team! Contact Marcy Denney at 904-384-5605 or contact@blowouthairstudio.com AFRICA, BRAZIL WORK/STUDY! Change the lives of others and create a sustainable future. 1, 6, 9, 18 month programs available. Apply now! Visit Oneworldcenter.org. 269-591-0518. info@ OneWorldCenter.org PHONE ACTRESSES FROM HOME Must have dedicated land line and great voice. 21+ Up to $18 per hour. Flex hrs/ most wknds. 1-800-403-7772, Lipservice.net $1,000 WEEKLY!! MAILING BROCHURES From Home. Helping home workers since 2001. Genuine Opportunity. No Experience required. Start Immediately www.mailingmembers.com

HOUSING WANTED ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Lonely? Bored? Broke? Find the perfect roommate to complement your personality and lifestyle at Roommates.com! FULLY FURNISHED 1 BEDROOM APARTMENT Fully furnished. All utilities included--lights, water and gas. Kitchen and snack bar. Hard wood floors. Shower/bath. $175/week or $700/month plus deposit. Contact hours from 9am - 6pm. Contact (904) 866-1850 DOWNTOWN EFFICIENCIES AND ROOMS All utilities included-lights, water, gas. Kitchenette. Snack bar. Shower, bath, and a deck. $125/week and up. Contact 9am-6pm only. (904) 866-1850.

ADOPTION PREGNANT? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-413-6293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/Indiana

HEALTH & BEAUTY SEE WHAT’S NEW Devi’s Closet Authentic Designer Clothes, Accessories and Home Goods. Just in time for the holidays. Gucci, Tiffany & Co, Prada, Chanel and more. WWW.FELICIASBEAUTYSECRETS.COM or contact 904-210-9009 LOSE FAT, INCREASE ENERGY with our special formula used by super athletes. www.healthalert.biz

PARTY RENTALS RENT OUR SPACE FOR YOUR NEXT EVENT! LOWER RATES THROUGH END OF JANUARY 2015. Special rental rates for available dates through the end of January 2015: Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs $300 (for seven hours) Friday, Sunday $800 (from 9AM-1AM next day) Saturday $1,000 (from 9AM-1AM next day). Contact (904) 396-2905 or Sandy at (904) 396-0459 PARTY SUPPLIES - RENTALS We provide supplies for your party or social activities: tables, chairs, tents, bouncing houses, and concessions (popcorn machine, snow cone machine, cotton candy machine). Visit our website www.mostachonllc.com

CHAT LINES ¿Hablas Español? HOT LATINO CHAT Call Fonochat now & in seconds you can be speaking to HOT Hispanic singles in your area.Try FREE! 1-800-416-3809 FEEL THE VIBE! HOT BLACK CHAT NOW. Urban women and men ready to MAKE THE CONNECTION Call singles in your area! Try FREE! Call 1-800-305-9164 WHERE LOCAL GIRLS GO WILD! Hot, Live, Real, Discreet! Uncensored live 1-on-1 HOT phone Chat. Calls in YOUR city! Try FREE! Call 1-800-261-4097 CURIOUS ABOUT MEN? Talk Discreetly with men like you! Try FREE! Call 1-888-779-2789. www.guyspy.com

EVENTS AND NOTICES FARM LIFE FOUNDATION PRESENTS THE MAIN EVENT 2014 “A NIGHT TO REMEMBER” Distinguished Venue : The Alfred I. duPont Riverfront Mansion Epping Forest Yacht Club 1830 Epping Forest Dr, Jacksonville, FL 32217 (904) 739-7200 December 7th 2014 Your evening begins at 5:30pm $150.00 donation per person Tickets available on-line: www.FarmLifeFDN.org Once in lifetime an event so specially crafted, planned and designed becomes a gift to the community. Farm Life Foundation will give a portion of net proceeds from The Main Event 2014 Fundraiser to the GMO Free Florida Org. and Equality Florida Org. Together Everyone Achieves More.

CUSTOMER SERVICE AIRLINE CAREERS begin here – Get trained as FAA certified Aviation Technician. Financial aid for qualified students. Housing and Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 844-210-3935.

GET FAST, PRIVATE STD TESTING. Results in 3 DAYS! Now accepting insurance. Call toll free: 855-787-2108 (Daily 6am10pm CT)

AUCTIONS, ESTATE SALES, GARAGE SALES COMMUNITY WIDE YARD SALE The Cape community-wide yard sale. Friday & Saturday, November 7 & 8. Located off Starratt Road just east of Yellow Bluff Road. For more information contact 904-757-7061

FOR SALE

KILL BED BUGS! Buy Harris Bed Bug Killer Complete Treatment Program/ Kit. (Harris Mattress Covers Add Extra Protection). Available: Hardware Stores, Buy Online: homedepot.com

VEHICLES WANTED CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808. www. cash4car.com

OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 39

40 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCT. 29-NOV. 4, 2014