Kinyatta E. Gray President and CEO
Publisher FlightsInStilettos, LLC
Editor-in-Chief Kinyatta E. Gray
Photo Credits: Ksenia Pro Photography Judah Avenue Photography
Mailing Address: 1710 Good Hope Rd, SE, Washington, DC 20019 Instagram: @flightsinstilettos Website: flightsinstilettos.com FlightsInStilettos ® Magazine Founded in 2021
CONTRIBUTORS DIAMOND GRAY IN THIS ISSUE: Wrote about millennial motherhood, balancing her career and social life.
CHANDRA GORE | @cgoreconsults IN THIS ISSUE: Wrote about how the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020 has brought to light an ongoing theme in the media of instances when Black women athletes have to deal with challenges to their mental health, womanhood, hair, and even motherhood.
JESSICA STRANG | @coco_and_peach_jewelry IN THIS ISSUE: Wrote about her passion for jewelry which inspired the launch of her business and brand coco +peach jewelry and how to start your jewelry collection with five easy pieces.
CHARRON MONAYE | @iamcharronmonaye IN THIS ISSUE: Wrote about reflecting on 2021, embracing change and looking ahead to 2022.
EDITOR’S LETTER FlightsInStilettos ® Magazine Welcome to the farewell issue of FlightsInStilettos ® Magazine. We had a fantastic year curating this fun, visually pleasing, and unique travel-inspired magazine! FlightsInStilettos Magazine is an extension of the exquisite travel brand FlightsInStilettos ®, founded by Kinyatta E. Gray in 2018. After releasing the first issue in January 2021, we were committed to publishing four issues of FlightsInStilettos Magazine during that same year to spotlight travel destinations, travel style, new authors, creatives and local entrepreneurs. We have accomplished that and much more and have enjoyed every minute of it! We also wanted to use this magazine to amplify the voices of ordinary people doing and achieving extraordinary things. With the release of this fourth issue, we have conquered yet another goal and will shift to focusing on new projects and initiatives. This is an especially busy time of the year since FlightsInStilettos is now a seller on Walmart and Amazon. We want to thank our staff and contributors for their expertise and dedication to this magazine. We hope that from the moment that you open this magazine until you read the last page -- you will find FlightsInStilettos Magazine insightful, informative and impactful. Thank you for supporting FlightsInStilettos Magazine! Kinyatta E. Gray Founder & Editor in Chief FlightsInStilettos ® Magazine
CONTENT ON THE COVER
JULIE MURPHY
15 THE FAMILY BUSINESS & LEAVING A LEGACY
ADVICE COLUMN 1 ASK KINYATTA
INSPIRATION 5 GRACE & GRIT: 6 WOMEN TRAILBLAZERS,
OWNING IT, KNOWING IT & SHOWING IT
25 REFLECTIONS ON MILLENNIAL MOTHERHOOD 39 GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY…
SPEAK ON IT! 27 BLACK WOMEN: SECONDARY VOICES
MENTAL HEALTH 34 7 WAYS TO GENUINELY HELP A FRIEND DURING THE HOLIDAYS
MOTIVATION 22 LOOK AT ME NOW: HEALTHY WEIGHT
MANAGEMENT TRANSFORMATIONS
FASHION 20 FIVE EASY PIECES
TRAVEL 18 DESTINATION: MALDIVES 29 4 STEPS TO CREATING YOUR TRAVEL VISION BOARD
FAREWELL 41 FLIGHTSINSTILETTOS ® MAGAZINE BIDS FAREWELL
ASK KINYATTA! FlightsInStilettos ® Magazine Founder and EIC Kinyatta E. Gray answers questions regarding relationships, friendships, marriages, and everything in between from ordinary people just like you who are open to her wisdom, sincerity, common sense, and sometimes humorous responses.
Question: What do you enjoy more – designing beach towels or being an author? L.M., Rockville, MD
Answer: This is a great question, and I’m glad to answer it. I officially launched FlightsInStilettos in early 2018. Everything was going great, and we were having a great time building the business and brand awareness. I had never thought about being an author until after my mom passed away in October 2018. I became an author to honor her legacy. So therefore, I was driven in two different directions -- both being fueled by tremendous passion and love. I love and am committed to both paths (entrepreneurship and authorship) equally. Disclaimer: Kinyatta E. Gray is providing information based on her personal experiences. This column is for entertainment purposes only.
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NOW AVAILABLE AT
KinyattaGray.com
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FLIGHTS IN STILETTOS GOLDEN BEAUTY BEACH TOWEL FLIGHTSINSTILETTOS.COM
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Model: @adelene.rose | Photo Credit: @Rokkstarrlyfe
NOW AVAILABLE AT
KinyattaGray.com
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GRIT & GRACE Women Trailblazers by Kinyatta E. Gray When I think of a trailblazer, I think of someone who knows it, shows it, and owns it. I think of a pioneer and an innovator who has created and lit the path for others to follow. Having spent time blazing a few trails myself, I know that the stakes are high, which is why this is not the place for the weak and insecure. A trailblazer understands the assignment and works to deliver because they know their legacy depends on it. Trailblazers are also passionate about leaving an indelible mark on the lives of others. They seek opportunities to give back, mentor, motivate, and inspire. They seek to educate and enlighten those around them. They also seek to lead an army of self-starting go-getters intrinsically motivated to live and achieve their best lives. Trailblazers are the rare, the unstoppable, and the determined. They don’t seek the spotlight, the spotlight craves for them. They possess grit and grace. As you turn the following few pages, I’ll introduce you to six women trailblazers who are fastcharging pioneers in their industries. These women are highly sought after for their wisdom and ability to lead and influence hundreds and even thousands of people. These women have achieved massive success and accolades alike for the impact they’ve made in their communities, business, humanity, and the world in general. 5
LEADING IN SEXUAL HEALTH ADVOCACY & PHILANTHROPY Angelia L. Robinson WHO Angelia L. Robinson is a Sexual Health Promoter/ Author/Entrepreneur/Philanthropist who resides in Fort Worth, TX.
BUSINESS PROFESSION As a Senior Executive Director & Senior Board Member for Pure Romance, I empower, educate & entertain women from the bedroom all the way to the banks. My autobiography, entitled Who R U? Tales of A Survivor is serving my mission to simply help women heal from past traumas like sex abuse in order to become the best version of themselves.
HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT I give women a voice and a safe place to be able to share their world (good and bad) via my in-home or zoom parties. I teach them about self love through education therefore helping to keep married people married and single people safe. In addition, I help to motivate them into a new way of thinking about entrepreneurship so that they can make their dreams come to fruition.
HER SUPERPOWER I have many superpowers but the most powerful of them all is my ability to love. I have an energy that is undeniable and intoxicating. As a result, when people plug into me they are supercharged into now believing they can do anything. Love tears down the walls and helps heal the hurt which paralyzes one into thinking they are not good enough.
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE It’s never too late to be who or what you might have been. George Eliot
You can only become truly accomplished at something you love. Don’t make money your goal. Instead pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you. Maya Angelou
SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT A mobile phone.
KEY CAREER ADVICE
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT
Just Do It and figure out the rest along the way.
All of the ideas that run through my head about how to help others achieve and how to further my own career. It’s hard to turn off my brain so most nights I have to crash.
Stay connected with Angelia via Instagram at: @angeliaspureromance and online at: angeliarobinson.com Photo Credit: shotbydphotography
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LEADING IN MULTI-LEVEL MARKETING AND BUSINESS Garine Dalce WHO
Garine Dalce is a Global Director from Severn, MD.
BUSINESS PROFESSION For over 10 years I worked as an Executive in Corporate America. As of November 2019, I retired myself from that position and launched my own Health and Wellness business.
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE Nothing will work unless you do. Maya Angelou
I provide all natural supplements to over 150 countries. HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT
Since launching my business, I have seen many people take control of their health and get their lives back on track.
Getting their lives back on track manifested in many ways. Some have lost enough weight where they no longer needed prescribed medications for previous ailments. They are happier and have more self-confidence.
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT • Wondering if I am doing enough for my family. • My next move. • Thinking about my children and their future. • How I can do more for my team. • How I can change Haiti and help the people.
In addition, I have coached many to financial freedom, whether it was making an extra couple thousands a month to walking away from their current employer. HER SUPERPOWER
My superpower is my strength to push through even if I may not see results instantly and definitely may faith in God.
SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT My beauty products and nutraburst.
Stay connected with Garine via Instagram at: @gdalce and online at: www.gdalce.com Photo Credit: @celebutonstyle
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KEY CAREER ADVICE Trust the process and have faith. Be Coachable.
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LEADING IN THE RUM INDUSTRY WHO
Donna F. Durante-Miller
Donna F. Durante-Miller is the Owner of Durante Rum and Owner & Operator of The New Elroy Bar DC
BUSINESS PROFESSION Durante Rum first premiered at The New Elroy Bar DC and was created in the DMV area. Durante Rum is a signature brand that earned me the honor of being the first black woman to create, distill and distribute my own brand of Rum. The Rum, the business, the marketing and sales are all inspired by my Caribbean roots. As a side note: Feel free to stop by The New Elroy Bar to say hi and for a complimentary taste of my Rum.
HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE For with God Nothing Shall be Impossible.
Durante Rum is available in many locally owned and operated liquor stores which increases their foot traffic during our free tasting events. Durante Rum donates to several local organizations and has also brought on employees (that due to their past) would have been excluded for employment. Finally, I have partnered with other minority owned business owners who use Durante Rum to create new products.
HER SUPERPOWER My ultimate superpower is my faith; which has kept me going even when I wanted to quit. Vision is my second superpower, through this vision the Rum has launched and we are already looking at adding another variation of Rum to the Durante family. Adaptability would be ranked as my third superpower and continues to help me pivot in this ever changing world. Mastering chaos is my fourth superpower and serves as a reminder to stay humble and grounded.
Stay connected with Donna via Instagram at: @duranterum and online at: www.duranterum.com Photo Credit: @amendoloraphoto
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Luke 1:37
SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT I cannot travel without snacks. It warms my heart when I am on the road and find something new to try. Most of the snacks I find are in small business and the feeling of helping another entrepreneur flourish is indescribable.
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT The senseless violence that is going on in this world is what keeps me up at night. Because of this, I am in the local community helping those who are overlooked. When the opportunity presents itself, I speak for those who do not have or cannot use their voice to make change. As I have mentioned before, giving back is what fills my heart and feeds my soul.
KEY CAREER ADVICE Be patient as good things come to those who wait. When you want to throw the towel in, remember that tomorrow is another day. You can do this!
LEADING IN COMMUNICATION AND “PITCHING” Precious L. Williams
WHO
Precious L. Williams is the CEO of Perfect Pitches by Precious, LLC and resides in Brooklyn, NY.
BUSINESS PROFESSION MEET THE #KILLERPITCHMASTER. To understand me is to understand my experience. I once weighed 327 pounds and somehow used my moxie, grit and determination to talk my way into funding for a company that didn’t even exist — Curvy Girlz Lingerie. I made this company a reality and my ability to think on my feet, boldly break the rules and tell a story has since made me the #KillerPitchMaster. Some also refer to me as the female McGuyver of business! DROPPING NAMES Besides helping women entrepreneurs and business leaders, I also conduct corporate training, helping teams to create killer communication skills, craft messaging and understand how to pitch and build sales programs. I’m also a world-class speaker for global brands including: Harvard University, Google, LinkedIn, Microsoft, George Washington University, Intuit Quickbooks, NBC Universal, PwC and more.
HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT
If you’re an organization, executive, entrepreneur or public speaker that’s ready to increase engagement and revenue with better communications, I give you the tools and tenacity to pitch with power, sell with storytelling and develop a masterful mindset for communication. It’s time for you to learn how to #SlayAllCompetition I help you learn how to communicate better by crafting messages that radiate authority and trust, so your clients and customers become fans for life. And I challenge you or your leaders to up their game — on their terms — in order to develop the cunning, clarity and confidence that’s been inside them all along. And you can bet we have fun doing it.
HER SUPERPOWER
The gift of speech, communication and connection!
SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT
Snacks
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT • Not completing the most important tasks • Forgetting to call/email someone • Taking my night medicine too late • Have I shown love today?
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE
Fortune favors the BOLD!
KEY CAREER ADVICE Create your own lane as a speaker. Get known for your zone of genius and truly own it. I am the #KillerPitchMaster and I am here to help you #slayallcompetition! Stay connected with Precious via Instagram at: @perfectpitchesp and online at: https://www.perfectpitchesbyprecious.com/ Photo Credit: Erin Michelle Silber
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LEADING IN THE
MUSIC INDUSTRY
Grenique Harper WHO
Grenique Harper is a national recording artist and songwriter who resides in Atlanta, GA. Atlanta, GA.
BUSINESS PROFESSION
I’m a renaissance woman. I am a singer/songwriter. I’m an author who paints and an actress who has a vintage boutique.
HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT
By being a singer/songwriter, I feel that I help heal the world through beautiful music. I feel that music is our universal language and the music that I create exudes love, peace and chivalry. I’m one who believes that chivalry isn’t dead.
HER SUPERPOWER
My superpower is being able to visualize something in my mind and bring it to fruition in this physical world through my hands. Like when I meditate and I hear a song or I see an image, I’m able to write the song or turn the image into a beautiful portrait.
SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT
A face mask and hand sanitizer. “These viruses that’s surfacing have everything intense.” ~Grenique
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT
My 19-year-old son who goes to Morehouse. I also spend a lot of time at night praying for him and visualizing a protective light around him to keep him safe as he walks through this world. Also, I lay in bed at night thinking about my parents because they’re getting older. I just want to make sure that they’re happy and healthy because I love them so much. I’m always planning my next move and that makes it hard to quiet my thoughts sometimes.
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE My mom always says “One lie can erase a thousand truths.” She’s a poet so she’s always quoting some dope lyrics. When I go through writer’s block, I call my mom for inspiration.
KEY CAREER ADVICE Love yourself and make sure you stay true to yourself. Also, learn the business of music and art because that’s how you protect yourself.
Stay connected with Grenique via Instagram at: @Msgrenique and online at: Grenique.com
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LEADING IN THE
MEDIA INDUSTRY
Rebecca Davi WHO
Rebecca Davi Queen of Talk, Entrepreneur, Speaker, Philanthropist & Founder of The Davi Magazine and Davi Media Group
BUSINESS PROFESSION
After overcoming depression and anxiety and having a love and commitment for helping others, Rebecca first set out on her successful media career on Radio, devoting herself to taking people from where they are currently positioned to where they wish to be by raising people’s performances. With a mission of transforming millions of lives worldwide while building a global community of likeminds, Rebecca created The Davi Magazine and The Rebecca Davi Show empowering people who feel stuck and lack hope to step into their greatness.
HOW SHE’S MAKING AN IMPACT
From deep yet humorous conversations with celebrity friends, well-known entrepreneurs, change-makers to hearing relatable real-life stories, my team and I continue to transform people’s lives through the lives of others. While placing diversity, equality and inclusion at the forefront, through The Rebecca Davi Show to The Davi Magazine, we only share empowering stories focusing on helping our viewers and listeners on their personal growth journey overcome life’s adversities.
FAVORITE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE Remember: the one with the biggest dreams will go through the toughest battles. Victory IS coming your way. Rebecca Davi SHE NEVER TRAVELS WITHOUT
Goodness! It would have to be my cell phone(s). I’m always on the go and check/respond to my emails as they pop up as the media and entertainment industry is very fast-paced - opportunities are quick to come and go so you have to be quick to seize them. Also, there’s nothing greater than a quick interaction with my amazing supporters while traveling to encourage them and boost their confidence for the day.
THIS KEEPS HER UP AT NIGHT
No matter your ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, shape or size, everyone deserves to be heard, everyone has an empowering story to share.
Thinking of how best to be of great service to others keeps me up at night. I’m constantly strategizing, constantly thinking of new ideas and how best to execute these ideas to transform the lives of others. When you have a love for what you do, you are constantly in “work mode,” however, it never really feels like work *laughs*.
HER SUPERPOWER
KEY CAREER ADVICE
Hmmm, what is my superpower? I most definitely have a healing ability. This is something my loved ones noticed in my childhood. I can’t think of anything greater than seeing others succeed. However, before we succeed, we must heal the pain of the past. Stay connected with Rebecca via Instagram at: @RealRebeccaDavi and online at: www.RebeccaDavi.com Credits: Styled By: @Miss_Awad Made Up By: @MadeUpByLaketa
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You must persevere until you succeed as nothing great comes easy. Have patience, connect with people, build strong relationships, get a mentor who has great expertise within your field, enjoy the process and always remember: if an idea was planted into your mind, you CAN create it in real life. Keep your eyes on the prize, let God be your guide and don’t let anyone, I repeat, ANYONE tell you otherwise.
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JULIE MURPHY
THE FAMILY
BUSINESS AND
LEAVING A LEGACY Julie Murphy and her brothers Chris Murphy and Jeff Murphy own and operate Murphy’s Auto Body Shop and Anacostia Rentals & Leasing, one of the DMV’s largest black family-owned businesses east of the Anacostia River in S.E., Washington, D.C.
“
I played basketball as an outlet and became great at it.
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“
Julie Murphy
In business for over 30 years in a bustling innercity community, they have repaired vehicles for the area’s dignitaries, politicians, professional athletes, and people from various parts of the DMV and beyond. Murphy’s Auto Body Shop was also nominated by D.C. Delegate Eleanor Holmes-Norton in 2014 for D.C.’s Small Business Award and won. Take one step inside of this beautiful oneof-kind body shop that occupies one whole city block, and you’ll see why this business is a beloved pillar in the community, and you’ll instantly feel like family too! A generally shy and humble introvert, Julie, the former Howard University basketball star (that paved the way for future women basketball players at Howard), sat down for a rare interview to discuss the family business, her legacy, and who inspires her the most.
What’s one thing you miss from your basketball days? Murphy: Running up and down the court, sweating and making that shot that everyone tried to block along the way LOL! I also miss when my closest family members and siblings would all convene at the neighborhood basketball court (Plummer Elementary) and it would be the Murphy clan against everyone else on the court! Of course we whooped our competition! Those were the good ole days. What is it like leading in a male-dominated work environment? Murphy: I don’t think about my gender; I do what needs to be done. I set clear expectations, and I am visible throughout the body shop during the day, prioritizing the completion of each job to maximize the number of quality and timely repairs for our customers. You are most known in the DMV for being a star basketball player throughout Washington, D.C. (during high school and during your tenure at Howard University) who once ranked #2 in the DMV for “rebounding”, tell us your fondest memory about your basketball days.
How did you gain the respect of your staff? Murphy: I lead by example; I’m in the body shop alongside them. I’m sympathetic to their needs as people and provide guidance and counsel as needed. I genuinely want my staff to be the best at what they do and take pride in what they do.
Murphy: My fondest memories include traveling on the road to different cities and playing in different gyms. I enjoyed the challenge of something new each week. I also enjoyed the camaraderie of my teammates and their dedication to be the best which resulted in us being one of the most competitive teams on the East Coast. How many days and hours per week did you typically practice to become one of the best women basketball players of your time in the DMV? Murphy: I practiced every day. During the school year I would practice daily after school and on the weekends, from sunup to sun down Saturday and Sunday. Eventually, I was recruited by Howard University and was offered a full athletic scholarship to attend and play on their women’s basketball team.
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Jeff Murphy
Julie Murphy
What is the biggest lesson you have learned as a business owner? Murphy: There are a lot of sacrifices that are made when it comes to time and money. As a minority business owner, often, our hurdles and expectations of us are different – yet we rise to the challenge every time. Tell us about the legacy your father left behind in the DMV auto body repair industry? Murphy: My father, Dave Murphy, and his two brothers Jimmy and Fred, were well known in this industry in the DMV, and they taught my youngest brother Chris everything they knew. Chris took that knowledge and launched Murphy’s Auto Body Shop with the support of my brother Jeff and me. As a result, within the last 30 years, we have grown to be an award-winning, and one of the largest black-owned family businesses in the DMV. What is it like running the largest black-owned family business in D.C.? Murphy: It’s a great feeling, and I am proud of it. I feel hopeful about having our children (Domo Broadus and Bre Murphy) carrying the legacy of Murphy’s Auto Body Shop forward. Who inspires you the most? Murphy: My spouse, Kinyatta Gray. It’s her strength, her willpower, her intelligence, and her “I will not give
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Chris Murphy
up” attitude. She inspires the hell out of me to keep going when shit gets hard. She gives me alternative ways to think of things when I want to believe the worst. What advice do you have for new entrepreneurs? Murphy: Select your people (staff) very carefully, they have to be on the same mission as you, and everything else can be taught. Choose people that are go-getters and motivated self-starters. How do you want to be remembered? Murphy: I want to be remembered as someone who did everything that I could to be successful and helped everyone that I could along the way. Also, I want to be remembered as a loving, unselfish, generous and honest person. I want to be remembered as an adoring spouse and a loving parent and family member. I’m thankful that Julie shared a little bit about herself and her career as a true trailblazer and leader in her community and in a highly competitive, tough and male-dominated industry. As you can see she’s the real deal and isn’t showing signs of slowing down any time soon. For more information about Murphy’s Auto Body Shop and Anacostia Rentals & Leasing visit: murphysautobodyshopdc.com and follow them at: @murphysautobodyshopdc on Instagram.
Maldives
DESTINATION
5 FASCINATING FACTS ABOUT THE MALDIVES
The Maldives is the smallest country in Asia, located in the Indian Ocean nestled southwest of Sri Lanka and India. More than 1.5 million tourists annually visit the Maldives luxuriating in more than 130 resort islands and high-end hotel brands. Its marine geography offers unique diving and watersports as well as undersea accommodations, restaurants, and spas. Instagram Fashion Influencer and Model ChicAma recently visited this heaven on earth and granted FlightsInStilettos Magazine access to stunning images of her glamorous vacation at this breathtaking island. As you enjoy the imagery, take notice of five fascinating facts about the Maldives! 18
Fact #1 Today’s Maldivian faces are the fruit of a civilization mix: African, Indian, European, Arabian, and Asian. Source: Dreamingofmaldives.com
Fact #2 Located close to the equator, the sun’s rays shine almost directly down on you, so bring plenty of highly rated sun protection with you. They strike at a 90° angle.
Fact #3 The people of the Maldives converted to Islam in 1153 A.D. Today, it is a strictly Muslim nation. Visitors must obey local laws and traditions: no alcohol is allowed (outside of the resorts). Local religious standards for beachwear and public dress should be followed.
Fact #4 The Maldives is one of the world’s safest travel destinations. This is largely because of the isolation of its island resorts.
Fact #5 The Maldives operates under the strict Sharia Law (Muslim religion); therefore, being LGBTQ is against the law. There is a little bit of flexibility when staying exclusively at the resorts. However, members of the LGBTQ community should research the destination carefully and abide by the country’s laws and expectations or select an alternative destination altogether!
Safe travels to the beautiful island of the Maldives! Source: https://thefactfile.org/maldives-facts/ Model: Chic Ama @chicamastyle on Instagram Photo Credit: Pullman Maldives
Five Easy
Pieces by Jessica Strang
I
f you’re reading this article, you very likely love fashion. Why else would you be here? Well, same here. I live for red carpet gowns, love the drama and exaggeration of runway shows, and can endlessly study the beauty and absurdity that comes with editorial looks. But my favorite type of adornment comes in the form of jewelry. Since the start of time, jewelry has been used to create the ultimate self-expression for the wearer. From prehistoric times to royalty to modern-day celebrities, jewelry has symbolized a person’s wealth, power, religion, and even social status. Jewelry creates memories, sends messages of prosperity, and is the finishing touch for an outfit. Jewelry makes history (hello, Beyonce for Tiffany & Co!), makes a moment even more significant (Meghan Markle wearing the Queen Mary Bandeau tiara at her wedding), and elevates a performer into icon status (Madonna’s cross and pearl necklaces, Selena Quintanilla’s hoop earrings). Jewelry is also the fashion accessory that is most near and dear to my heart. After all, you could say jewelry is in my genes. I spent a lifetime in my parent’s own Chicago jewelry store and watched firsthand how clients set out to start their collections by buying pieces and saving up for others. So, when I launched my own brand, coco + peach jewelry, it was with the intention of designing affordable modern treasures that could be worn day to night and wouldn’t be tossed away after a season.
Another key point that I have in mind when designing jewelry is: what is missing from my own jewelry box? And that got me to thinking that maybe, others are wondering the same thing. With so many options, it can be overwhelming and sometimes hard to know where to begin when shopping for your own jewelry compilation. So, I started assembling pieces and posting them on my social media every Friday, calling it “Five Easy Pieces.” Five Easy Pieces is my how-to guide to create an ultimate jewelry collection using coco + peach jewelry or even what you already own. Five Easy Pieces is a pretty simple formula for you to get creative, start small (only five pieces of jewelry) and have a foundation for building up your jewelry collection. First, start with a statement earring- you know, the kind of earring that is bold, sophisticated, and leaves a lasting impression. Next, you’ll need a pair of stud earrings. Stud earrings are my go-to, every day, running errands kind of earrings but by no means boring. I like to create and wear tiny works of art with my stud earrings, so even though they are small, they pack a big fashion punch.
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Third, necklaces are key to creating some drama on your neck. You should always have one necklace on hand, which can be worn solo or as a foundation for layering more necklaces. When you want to create a layering look, I like to keep the formula simple: 1. Begin by choosing 3-4 necklaces of different lengths. 2. Get creative and mix up the metals and textures (wide, chunky, beaded, simple chain). 3. Pick one necklace with a focal point (such as a medallion or pendant). A quick way to keep them detangled is to choose necklaces that are a few inches apart in length from each other. (Side note: since I love layering my necklaces so much, I created a detangler solution- the Neck’s Best Friend detangler that helps keep them separate). Your fourth easy piece is a bracelet. Similar to the approach I take with necklaces, I like to wear bracelets on their own or stack them up. My method to create an ultimate bracelet stack is pretty simple: I start with something beaded (like my Bethany bracelets), something thick (like the Isel herringbone bracelet), and then add a thin bracelet (like the best-selling Lisa evil eye bracelet). Your final piece for your jewelry starter collection is an everyday ring. Choose something effortless yet chic, and this will elevate anything you’re wearing, especially your manicure. I designed the Maureen ring for this purpose when I couldn’t find something that I could slip on daily that wasn’t too fussy. And there you have it -- five pieces to start your jewelry collection for every season and reason.
CONTRIBUTOR Jessica Strang is the Designer & Founder of coco +peach jewelry. Follow coco + peach jewelry on Instagram @coco_and_peach_jewelry for more style inspiration and tips, and visit: www.cocopeachjewelry.com to shop for your ultimate c+p Five Easy Pieces.
Photo Credit: Luis Arevalo Jewelry model: Katherine Alvarado MUA: Stephanie Jarrin
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Look At Me Now!
HEALTHY WEIGHT MANAGEMENT TRANSFORMATION “Queen” Brittney Thornton Baltimore, MD “Don’t settle for the environment you were given, change the environment to what you wish to see!” THE INSPIRATION TO TRANSFORM MY BODY
MOTIVATION
I wanted to feel better about myself, get healthier and physically look better (to myself ) in the mirror. My family members suffer from heart disease, diabetes and strokes. I didn’t want to be a “repeat” of the same.
My family, my loved ones, and the internal drive to beat myself every day in my own game of life. I know that I never want to go back to being that girl so I check myself often.
HOW MY TRANSFORMATION CHANGED MY LIFE I have way more energy and people have noticed my confidence increased gradually too! I love how the discipline to stick to it allowed me to find a purpose in helping to educate other people to become healthier in their lives. I’m happier, healthier and helping everyone around me become a better person inside and out!
HOW I DID IT I focused on nutritional education, cardio and weight training… that’s right the hard way. I didn’t want to do surgery because I knew I wanted longevity and to work on my habits for a lifetime. Within 3-years I lost 150 pounds naturally with proper application of nutrition.
KEY ADVICE FOR THOSE WANTING TO TRANSFORM THEIR BODY Start with loving yourself, striping naked to your vulnerabilities and continue to challenge yourself to always make progress every day. You can make small changes daily that turn into new good habits. Do your research and pay attention to your body. Remember that the journey is the reward, everything else is a bonus! For more inspiration and motivation, keep up with Brittney via Instagram: @thequeenofcoverage and online at: www.thequeenofcoverage.com Photo Credit: @wxrldofwaddy
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Look At Me Now!
HEALTHY WEIGHT MANAGEMENT TRANSFORMATION Jerome Woods, II Elkridge, MD
“The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23
THE INSPIRATION TO TRANSFORM MY BODY
MOTIVATION
I wanted my body to reflect my mindset of healing and wholeness. I simply want to live my best life and be around my loved ones without fear of succumbing prematurely from weight related illness.
I am motivated by my love for my wife Alana and my Lord. I want to be in the best possible shape to serve them both.
HOW MY TRANSFORMATION CHANGED MY LIFE
KEY ADVICE FOR THOSE WANTING TO TRANSFORM THEIR BODY
I have more energy to do the things I enjoy and my health has significantly improved. I am overjoyed that I have ceased all medication and no longer have diabetes.
Don’t give up. When I first started running, I could not run 10 feet. Now, I can run a half mile without stopping. Believe in yourself and not the scale. You are more than your weight.
HOW I DID IT I see a nutritionist regularly and hike at least twenty miles per week. I swim two hours per week. I had a good push from a gastric procedure.
CHANGE FOR HEALTH NOT VANITY!
For more inspiration and motivation, keep up with Jerome via Instagram: @jeromewoods6590.
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Look At Me Now!
HEALTHY WEIGHT MANAGEMENT TRANSFORMATION Fai’ye & Derek Waldorf, MD
“Knowing is not enough. We must APPLY. Willing is not enough. We must DO.” Bruce Lee
THE INSPIRATION TO TRANSFORM MY BODIES We’ve always tried our best to stay in-shape. As athletes in high school and college, we’ve set high expectations for ourselves. However, the birth of our youngest child slowed us down and we lost our rhythm. We quickly decided it was time to reset our goals and get back in shape!
HOW OUR TRANSFORMATIONS CHANGED OUR LIVES Getting back in-shape has given us the energy we need to keep up with our toddler! Working out helps us to relieve stress and decompress from long days at work and that helps us to be better partners to each other. We’re able to give each other words of affirmation to help each other feel confident while we’re out on the town. For more inspiration and motivation, keep up with Fai’ye & Derek via Instagram: @Team_Aikens24.
HOW I DID IT We try our best to moderate the “bad foods” that we eat. We can certainly do better. But we try to balance a reasonable diet of chicken, fish and spinach with weekly rigorous exercise. She prefers Zumba and mild strength training. He enjoys running, strength training, and kickboxing the heavy bag. Typically, we do a minimum of 30 minutes of action for 3-days a week.
MOTIVATION First, our passion to stay energized enough to keep up with our kids keeps us motivated! We’re passionate about our time with family and we want to be able to enjoy every minute possible with our little ones. Also, we try our best to stay “beach body” ready. We find it fun to challenge ourselves to get tight before a sexy vacation.
KEY ADVICE FOR THOSE WANTING TO TRANSFORM THEIR BODY Start small and don’t be hard on yourself about the numbers. Be patient, but consistent. Stay focused on your goal and know that you can do it! Celebrate the small victories because they will add up to your ultimate success!
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REFLECTIONS ON MILLENNIAL MOTHERHOOD by Diamond A. Gray
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Though being a mom has brought its challenges, I’ve always embraced my journey head-on and continued to grow for the better of my son and myself. I would never have thought we’d be where we’re at today, but everything is possible when you strive to be the best mother you can be to your child. Every day I continue to grow alongside my son, and it’s been one of my greatest pleasures. Witnessing his first steps, first words - to now full-on races when we’re at the park, and conversations back and forth. It’s been such a sweet honor being Karter’s mom. He is the smartest, most polite, and talkative 2-year old there is, and I honestly can’t wait to watch my baby continue to grow. It’s been quite a balancing act between motherhood, social life, career, and life in general. It all balances in time. Just continue to strive!!
CONTRIBUTOR Diamond Gray is a “millennial mom.” She aims to inspire other millennial moms to embrace the changes that come along with motherhood and take time for themselves to practice self-care (including caring for their mental health). Photos: Courtesy of Alex & Max Klein’s Wedding (2021), Michael Stavrinos Photography
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Here are a few things for new moms to consider - I’m still new at this too! 1. Everything takes time, & everything will turn out fine. 2. Everyone’s journey is different, as long as your child remains the priority, and 3. Always remember, your mental health matters too! My favorite inspirational quotes are:
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It’s okay to be grumpy sometimes, to have bad days, to struggle, to make mistakes, to say the wrong thing, feel overwhelmed and underappreciated, to be out-of-sorts and sort-of-over-it all. It’s okay for us big humans, and it’s okay for our little humans, too. After all, we’re all humans, right? How else will our little humans learn that it’s okay to be human? Remember, we’re imperfect humans growing imperfect humans in an imperfect world, and that’s perfectly okay. L.R. Knost Being a mother is discovering strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you never knew existed. Sherene Simon
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’ve undoubtedly experienced my greatest joys becoming a mother. But I know there’s so much more to come! My son Karter is such a ball of light in my life, and I’m so thankful for him! Anyone who knows Karter will say he brightens up any room, on any day! In addition, I’ve gained a new sense of womanhood within myself after becoming a part of the honorable calling of motherhood.
NOW AVAILABLE AT
KinyattaGray.com
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Black Women: Secondary Voices by Chandra Gore
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he Olympic Games Tokyo 2020 has brought to light an ongoing theme in the media of instances where Black women athletes have to deal with challenges to their mental health, womanhood, hair, and even motherhood. Black women have had the ongoing issue of having to prove their pain to be heard or understood. Seeing the number of stories and the press and public responses have been overwhelming and disheartening, to say the least. Just think, for every story that has been published, there are a multitude of untold stories, and daily battles fought. From primary care physicians to employers who do not take the word of black women when speaking up or addressing issues that affect them in their daily life. Sports is just the tip of When nine-time Olympic medalist Allyson Felix was told to “know her place,” she knew it was time to make a change and to make a stand. Since becoming a mom, Felix headed to her first Olympic challenge, The Tokyo 2020 Games. In addition to being a seasoned Olympic athlete, she has recently launched a lifestyle brand, Saysh, which was inspired by the “gender injustice” that she endured while on her way to becoming a mother. Felix has used the “injustice” to create a safe space for other athletes to experience motherhood without fear of ruining their careers. Per her statement via an Instagram post, “I was scared to stop running. I wasn’t sure I would fully know who I was without it. Like many women, I was afraid that starting a family would be a “death sentence” for my career. I did it anyway. During my pregnancy, I faced a gender injustice that I couldn’t run away from. My employer did not support my maternity and my colleague’s maternity in a way that I could be proud of. I was told to know my place --that runners should just run, that it’s just business. Instead, I spoke up. I used my voice to fight for maternal protection for female athletes. No woman should have to choose between being a professional and being a Mother. Now, because of that fight, sponsorship contracts look different for a lot of athletes.
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(self.com) During my pregnancy, I had complications. And I realized I needed to use my voice to bring awareness to another injustice: a racial injustice in our healthcare system. I spoke to the United States Congress about my experience - and I continue to use my voice for change.”
When Naomi Osaka announced to skip post-match press during the French Open in May 2021 to protect her mental health, she was fined and stated that she had no choice to reveal her mental health issues because the Press and Tournament did not believe her. This has been an ongoing situation with black women who speak up for themselves and are not believed when they are suffering or have to have someone cosign their suffering. When will this madness stop - this is not just confined to sports but other areas of Black women’s lives. Black women are deserving of respect and understanding and should not have to fight for it. This must change. We are not a monolith; we are human beings that should be heard.
Hearing the story of two 18-year-old cisgender sprinters from Namibia, Christine Mboma and Beatrice Masilingi were disheartening. They both have been banned from running in the Olympic 400-meter dash because they have a “naturally high testosterone level.” In addition, they have been added to the list of African women banned from track events for not fitting into the World Athletics organization’s definition of womanhood. The mistreatment of black women in sports had even extended into the swimming industry when the Olympics banned the use of Soul Cap. The brand of swim cap made it easy for swimmers who wore braids, extensions, dreadlocks, or curly thick hair to protect their hair. The rejection was on the premise that the caps were unsuitable for they do not follow “the natural form of the head’, for most, this decision was not a surprise. This decision could cause little black girls looking up to the black women swimmers to stop pursuing their dreams.
The poem is dedicated to those who are unsure or are doubting themselves.
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Remember why you started. That smile on your face when you had a breakthrough Success is on the horizon Never forget that You define what success means and looks like Let no one or nothing tell you any different You are spectacular You are a winner You are worthy! Xoxo- Chandra
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(glamour.com)
CONTRIBUTOR Chandra Gore has worked with entrepreneurs to help them create foundations for success through her boutique consulting and public relations firm, Chandra Gore Consulting. Quietly making strides with placements for small businesses, entertainment, authors, therapists and motivational speaking clients on local and national news outlets she has been leaving her mark as a publicist in the industry. Launching Conversations with Chan - her personal brand that includes a podcast, online publication and YouTube Interview series. She is also a contributing writer for publications such as Pretty Women Hustle Magazine. www.conversationswithchan.com.
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4 Steps To Creating Your
Travel Vision Board
2022
by Kinyatta E. Gray It works the same way as any other kind of vision board that you may have created at the beginning of the year -focusing on your professional goals, personal goals, and aspirations. However, a travel vision board is all about visualizing the vacation of your dreams until it manifests. Traveling to your dream destination is an aspiration that you can “will” into reality. Seeing your travel vision board every day will guide your actions in the direction of achieving that which you envision.
Have you ever considered creating a Travel Vision Board? 29
A travel vision board can include as many destinations as you can envision or even just a few. This is your vision board, so be as flashy with your luxury travel desires or as frugal as you want to be. Feel free to add excursions, delicacies, and even people that you’d love to travel with. You’re only limited by your desires and imagination!
You can quickly and easily create a seasonal, yearly, or lifetime travel vision board in a few easy steps!
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Decide on where you want to go and your travel budget. Don’t worry--you may not desire to travel the globe just yet... there’s a lot to see stateside and locally.
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Use a photo app to create a picture collage, and list your desires in the FlightsInStilettos Travel Journal and save it!
These are the most critical steps to help keep your travel desires accessible for viewing pleasure and manifestation. First, please print out the collage and pin it to your desktop, refrigerator, and bathroom mirror. Then, look at it daily and jot down any thoughts that you may have in your FlightsInStilettos Travel Journal.
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Find the destination images on the internet. Don’t be shy! Save everything you like, even the excursions, restaurants, hotels, and the rented Aston Martin!
4 Visualize yourself on vacation! The more that you visualize your dream destination, the more your brain will trigger your behavior to make it happen!
Can you see it now? Luxuriating and being pampered in the most exclusive bungalow in turquoise blue water and white sandy beaches while your every wish is the butler’s command? Ahhhhhh, what a life! What are you waiting for? Open your mobile phone and go!
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FLIGHTSINSTILETTOS
SHADES OF BEAUTY BEACH TOWEL FLIGHTSINSTILETTOS.COM
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Model: @yourbabygirlsissy | Photo Credit: @Rokkstarrlyfe
NOW AVAILABLE AT
KinyattaGray.com
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7 WAYS TO GENUINELY HELP A GRIEVING FRIEND DURING THE HOLIDAYS by Kinyatta E. Gray At some point in life, everyone will experience a traumatic loss. Whether it’s you or a friend, the loss will happen, and it will seem like you will never get beyond the excruciating pain the first few months after experiencing the loss. If it’s your friend who has experienced the loss, you too may feel saddened by what’s happened but confused and even awkward about how to help your friend, especially during the holidays. You don’t want to seem aloof and insensitive, yet you don’t want to be in the way and insert yourself where you don’t belong. The funeral has concluded, your friend’s loved one has been buried, what should you do after that to show your support? I’m sharing the 7 Ways to Genuinely Help a Grieving Friend based on my experience grieving my beloved mother’s traumatic sudden, and unexpected loss in 2018. These steps don’t have to be followed in any particular order and can be modified to fit your lifestyle and your friend. Any combination of these steps will surely give you the awareness that you need as you strive to support your friend. .
Keep up with Kinyatta via Instagram: @kinyattagraytheauthor and online: kinyattagray.com
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Be patient and understanding of your friend’s mood and personality change while they are grieving.
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Schedule face-to-face visits.
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Look out for danger signs.
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Don’t give up on your friend.
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Recommend resources such as my book:
Grief causes physical and emotional changes. The happy-go-lucky life of the party friend you once knew before the significant loss is now dealing with a traumatic experience and could use your understanding and patience as they work through their grief and influx of new painful emotions.
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Ask your friend how you can help them. Don’t assume that you know exactly what your friend wants and needs from you. Losing a loved one unimaginably changes a person’s world. What you thought once made them happy- after the loss, could trigger more pain. Be mindful, thoughtful, and ask your friend how you can best help them. Continue to reach out to your friend via calls, cards, or quick emails, or quick text messages regularly after they have lost a loved one. You may also want to consider giving them the I Miss You (grief journal) by Kinyatta E. Gray to help them safely release their feelings and emotions. Refer to their loved one by name -- after all, they did exist. Often, people make the mistake of cutting off the communication with a friend about their loss about a month after the funeral because you personally have moved past the loss, and its impact has not profoundly affected you. Over time, through regular communication with your friend, you will sense that healing is occurring because life starts coming back to them as they begin to heal. They will talk differently; they may seem more interested in the things they lost interest in after suffering their loss. Refer to your friend’s departed loved one by name. Acknowledging them by their name respects their prior earthly existence -- they exist now in spirit form.
Kinyatta E. Gray is a best-selling author who wrote and released her first book in October 2019 about the loss of her mother. Kinyatta aims to spread awareness about grief and loss, following one’s inner voice and sharing messages of love, peace, hope, and light.
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Phone calls and text messages are good, but getting in your vehicle and paying your friend a home visit sends the message that they are valued, worthy, and loved. Sit with your friend, hug your friend, hold your friend’s hand. Just be there and present in the moment. You don’t have to say much more than I love you, and I am here for you. You may also take this time to prepare a favorite meal or dessert for your friend or help with light housework.
Sometimes a loss can be so catastrophic that your friend may want to end their life or maybe so severely depressed that you become frightened for their safety. Believe your friend if they express suicidal thoughts. Bring this information to the closest loved one in their home so that your friend can be closely monitored during their time of grief. It is almost impossible to force an adult to go to therapy; however, you can ensure that your friend has essential telephone numbers like the Suicide Hotline and respected clergy.
Grief lasts forever. However, over time your friend will learn to live with the grief and function in a manner where they seek happiness and joy out of life once again. It takes time. There’s no magic date by which your friend will resemble the friend they were before the loss. Hopefully, your love and friendship were not based on “good times” but genuine love and commitment to your friend through good times and not-so-good times.
30 Days: Surviving the Trauma and Unexpected Loss of a Single Parent as an Only Child. Sometimes, when a person reads about how someone else survived a tragedy, it provides hope that they can too in time, with the proper love and support. You may want to include a cuddly emotional support teddy bear.
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As a Psychotherapist/Art Therapist, I am always using creative interventions to help my clients toward their mental health journey. I work with grieving clients on a daily basis who struggle with finding the right words to articulate the pain, emptiness and isolation that emerges after someone they love passes. The grief journal entitled, “I Miss You” by Kinyatta E. Gray, is an essential approach for addressing bereavement and providing a reflective space for full expression to heal while grieving. I encourage my clients to allocate time to tend to their emotional needs to establish a healthy relationship with their pain. The goal being to effectively cope and listen to what their feelings are telling them instead of repressing them or self-medicating. This journal provides a daily regimen for ensuring support systems, healthy grieving strategies and rituals that commemorate loved ones are practiced to help redefine life without the physical form of the person, but by still remembering and honoring their presence, lessons and memories.
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By Corrona Boston, LPC, ATR, DBT-C
Learn More: KinyattaGray.com 36
LEARN MORE
KinyattaGray.com
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LEARN MORE
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God Grant Me The Serenity… By Charron Monaye
“The great courageous act that we must all do,
Oprah Winfrey
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in 2019 or pre-covid”, and it probably was, but are you striving for “comfortable” or “extraordinary”.
Why are we so afraid of change? Is it because we are unprepared for the unknown or that we don’t believe that we deserve what’s coming? When people speak about “shifting”, it’s nothing more than welcoming change. Change is inevitable and, most importantly, sometimes out of our control. Just like the seasons to the weather, to what you wear each day, change is a part of our lives. Have you ever driven the same route home but one particular day a road was blocked forcing you to take a detour? At first, you yelled and cursed because you thought this detour was taking you out of the way, but low and behold you got to your destination sooner. When you give yourself permission to accept a detour in life, you open yourself up to reaching your destination faster. You may also eliminate extra pitfalls or setbacks just by agreeing to change your route in life. Now I know you may be thinking, “But life made so much sense back
Covid and everything else that has transpired since 2020, has not only made us alter and readjust from our cars to our computers, but it gave people permission to focus on family, fitness, finances, while forcing some to change careers due to job loss. It, also, changed the perspective of what was most important in life as it removed family members, stagnated opportunities, while awakening everything we have thrown under the rug due to our busy lives. 2020 created the rippling effects of change and losing! 2021 held everyone accountable while forcing everyone to embrace the new reality! And even though 2022 is a mystery, I challenge you to take the lessons learned, your new perspective, and the beauty of still having life here on earth as a sign that God is still on the throne! Change may be evitable, but he is not done with you yet, so there is still a chance for you to win, grow, and become who you are destined to be, even in the middle of change! When you embrace change you begin the journey of freedom and a lifestyle that comes with success and happiness. It’s like God starts rewarding us for finally accepting and trusting him. Since the coronavirus locked us down, I have been able to get so much accomplished; my lifestyle has grown, my
ovid has changed everything? I don’t understand this virtual world. How will my business flourish in this new normal? Between Covid, Unemployment, and the end of the War, will people even be interested in my book? Why did 2020 even happen? How am I supposed to elevate, excel, and encourage anyone in 2022, if I refuse to embrace this new normal? Can we just things back to the way they were, already?
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is to have the courage to step out of our history and past so that we can live our dreams.
business has flourished and my trust in my own ability has heightened. I no longer play myself short because I have the receipts of what change can do. Now don’t get me wrong, there will be hills and valleys that may occur as the change takes place, but those obstacles will keep you motivated to move forward. Now, I want you to reflect on all of the positivity that has happened to you, and for you, in 2020 and 2021. Think about where you were and where you are now! What has changed for the better? Are you at a better job? Enhanced your love life? Finally purchased that new home. Spending more time with family? Give yourself permission to see the good that has happened. And then I want you to see 2022 as the continuation of growing all that is good in your life. This new normal has not given you permission to quit, but it has given you the opportunity to start over. And when you start over, don’t start from scratch. This time use all the tools, resources, concepts, lessons, and with a made-up mind proclaim that this time, this year, “Will Be Your Year”. Be clear on what you want, speak it, write it, and get to work. Just because society focuses on what we’ve lost, I want you to use the power of change to fully commit and bet on you! It’s about time, don’t you think? To provide you with a shield of protection as you journey, I want to offer you the Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr that can serve as comfort and reassurance as you prepare for what’s to come.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
I understand change can be scary, but as long as you trust God, believe in yourself, and know what you can and cannot do, I promise you what’s about to come will be better than what you’ve lost! Happy New Year!!!!
CONTRIBUTOR Charron Monaye is an award-winning best-selling author and playwright. In 2008 Monaye Founded PEN LEGACY®, a literary conglomerate dedicated to helping aspiring writers share their stories by providing a platform to elevate their unique voices. Since its inception, Pen Legacy has evolved to include a publishing, scriptwriting, and ghostwriting division.
Photo Credit: Brenda Lee
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THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT OF FLIGHTSINSTILETTOS ® MAGAZINE!
FAREWELL! XO, 39
Kinyatta E. Gray
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