76537 Life • October 2026 by Fidelis Publishing Group, LLC

OCTOBER 2026

CALLED

TO SERVE STEVE SNELL A lifetime of leadership, hands-on approach, and a deep, personal commitment to Williamson County

TEXAS SIT REP Building What Comes Next THE REAL DEAL CR 314 Improvement Update WORTH THE DRIVE "Scare for a Cure" in Manor

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ABOUT THIS ISSUE

n an age where the rush of daily news often overshadows the deeper narratives that shape our community, 76537 Life constantly strives to be an eager beacon of positivity and unity. Far more than just a lifestyle magazine, our publishers and staff are committed to creating a means of getting to know what makes our community thrive: its people and their impact. Since its inception in 2021, 76537 Life, Has grown with the community – we originally mailed to 4,200 homes and businesses in 76537 and now mail to over 9,600 homes and businesses monthly. Works closely with Jarrell Independent School District, the Jarrell Chamber of Commerce, Sonterra MUD, Jarrell Economic Development Corporation, Jarrell Community Library and Resource Center, and the City of Jarrell. Is a local business, located in Jarrell, that employs local people. Has, to date, mailed close to 400,000 magazines within the 76537 area. But we are also good at doing what we do — showcasing prominent community agencies and initiatives like the Jarrell Education Foundation, Jarrell Community Library, Jarrell ISD students, FFA, 4-H, and many more on our covers and in multi-page features. These not only celebrate their contributions but also inspire readers to personally engage and participate in the missions of these community pillars.

The White House gets plenty of attention, but some of the decisions that touch our lives most closely happen much closer to home and the mid-term races deserve our attention this month, too. Judges and justices of the peace make consequential decisions about bail and pretrial release, our county judge and commissioners make decisions about the resources, staffing, and services that keep our county running. These offices may draw fewer headlines, but their work matters to every family in Jarrell and Sonterra. I encourage all our readers to take a little time to learn about the candidates, review your ballot, and make a plan to vote. Whatever your priorities, voting is one of the most direct ways to turn them into a voice in our community’s future.

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PUBLISHERS • Cathy Payne, Mike Payne COMMUNITY EDITOR • Camy Reynolds SENIOR WRITER/COPY EDITOR • Ann Marie Kennon CONTRIBUTING WRITERS • Linda A. Thornton Charlotte Kovalchuk GRAPHICS Ann Marie Kennon ∙ Joni Mozis DIGITAL MEDIA MANAGER Jesse Payne ADVERTISING 512.746.4545 • info@myjarrell.com 76537 Life is a Fidelis Publishing Group, LLC publication and a product of AdvocateNewsTX Newspaper. Copyright © 2026 All rights reserved. 76537 Life is published monthly and mailed USPS, free of charge, to homes and businesses in the 76537 zip code. Mail may be sent to 76537 Life, P.O. Box 213, Jarrell, TX 76537. Email: info@ myjarrell.com SCAN THE CODE FOR E-SUBSCRIPTION AND NEVER MISS AN ISSUE.

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CONTENT

IN THIS ISSUE 6 / COVER FEATURE • Steve Snell: Called to Serve

12 / TEXAS SIT REP • Building What Comes Next 18 / BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT • Jarrell Industrial Park 23 / THE REAL DEAL • CR 314 Improvements 26 / WORTH THE DRIVE • Scare for a Cure 28 / NEIGHBOR LEIGH • The Flurbenknocker Problem

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COVER FEATURE

by Ch a r lot te Kova lc h u k a nd A nn Ma r i e Ke nnon Williamson County Judge Steve Snell serving lunch to Sheriff Matt Lindemann during Law Enforcement Appreciation Day.

A Responsibility

He Made His Own Thirty-one years in public service taught JUDGE STEVE SNELL that leadership means showing up—especially with things get tough.

n the spring of 2025, after 11 years as superintendent of Liberty Hill ISD, Steve Snell was preparing to retire. He and his wife, Amy, were praying about a simple question: How can God still use me? Serving as County Judge had never been part of Snell's plan, but after Judge Bill Gravell resigned to work for the Trump administration, Steve studied the role and the work looked familiar: bring people together, prepare for emergencies, manage growth, protect public resources, and make decisions with consequences likely to be felt for decades. “I feel like my entire career led to this point and prepared me to do the job,” he says. “As weird as it sounds, I really do think God put me in this place for a reason and wants me to serve people as best I can.” 6

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SERVICE BEYOND THE BUDGET Since taking office in April 2025, Snell has approached the position as another form of public service. The work takes place in Commissioners Court and budget meetings, but its purpose is found beyond those rooms: in the deputy answering a dangerous call, the family stranded in traffic instead of gathering around the dinner table, and the child who will inherit the community being shaped today. Public safety is not just a budget line to Judge Snell. It means ensuring people who run toward emergencies have the staffing and support to do their jobs. The county’s 2026-27 budget added 47.5 full-time positions, nearly half in public safety, and includes $1.05 million for law-enforcement raises.

His regard for those officers also appears in quieter moments. On Law Enforcement Appreciation Day, Snell helped provide barbecue and stood behind the serving line, handing meals to Sheriff Matt Lindemann (above) and all the Williamson County deputies. It was a small gesture beside the scale of county government, but it revealed something spreadsheets don't: gratitude expressed personally.

WHEN THE WATER ROSE The devastating July 2025 floods put that experience to an immediate test. Three people died in Williamson County, while homes and RV parks were badly damaged. Judge Snell helped direct the county’s emergency response, but he was also boots on the ground in affected communities, working along-

COVER FEATURE

We did not wait. We took immediate action, and we felt we saved lives and property by doing that. ~JUDGE STEVE SNELL

side responders and residents as rescue evolved into cleanup, recovery, and repair. “One thing I’m very proud of Williamson County is we took immediate action,” the judge says. Afterward, he partnered with the Central Texas Community Foundation to establish the WilCo Cares Fund, helping displaced residents meet urgent needs and begin rebuilding. He also joined Central Texas leaders testifying before state lawmakers about emergency preparedness, infrastructure, and better flood-warning systems—carrying the lessons learned on damaged Williamson County roads and riverbanks directly to the policymakers.

WILCO IN THE FUTURE Rapid growth presents a slower-moving version of that challenge. Williamson County’s population is expected to double over the next 25 years and Judge Snell has lived that transformation before. As superintendent, he guided enrollment growth from about 4,000 to 11,000 students and oversaw more than $1 billion in building projects. Every new school represented children who needed a classroom before overcrowding became a crisis and county planning works the same way. Roads must be planned before traffic overwhelms a community. Emergency services must grow before response times suffer. Water must be secured before families and businesses discover there is not enough.

Judge Snell is looking even farther ahead on water. He spearheaded a $500,000 study of existing supplies and future possibilities, including groundwater, reuse, and regional partnerships. “I want to make sure we’re securing water for the next 50 years,” he said. His education career also shaped a collaborative style he summarizes in three words: “Communication, communication, communication.” Today, he works with elected officials, department leaders, and municipalities whose cooperation is essential to a county too complex for anyone to lead alone. Still, the most revealing images may be the least formal: talking with schoolchildren on the courthouse steps, celebrating a new community library, or sitting beside a local veteran. He and his wife Amy recently celebrated 30 years of marriage and remain active at Celebration Church in Liberty Hill. “We live here, eat here, play here,” he says. “Community service—it’s in my DNA.” Steve Snell was appointed to complete an unfinished term. Now he is asking voters for the opportunity to continue work already underway. As voters consider who should lead Williamson County, Judge Snell hopes they will look beyond the title to the responsibility he has already made his own.

“As superintendent, you’re locked into the success that they’re building,” Judge Snell says. “Now I get to do it on a bigger scale for so many other communities.” Under his leadership, the county has continued long-range transportation planning and secured approximately $131 million in federal funding for roadway and trail projects. For him, mobility is about returning time to people whose evenings should belong to their families, not to congestion created because government failed to prepare.

ELECTION DAY IS NOVEMBER 3 | EARLY VOTING OCTOBER 19-30 POLITICAL ADVERTISEMENT PAID FOR BY THE STEVE SNELL CAMPAIGN

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TEXAS SIT-REP

by A nn Ma r i e Ke nnon • p h oto c ou rte s y Re p. Te r r y W i ls on

TERRY WILSON

 BUILDING WHAT COMES NEXT

Long before Terry Wilson began working on state budgets, education policy, workforce development, or emergency preparedness, he spent 32 years serving his country as an American soldier.

hat experience continues to shape the way Colonel Wilson approaches his work as the Texas House District 20 representative. His record in the Legislature reflects a leader focused not simply on identifying problems, but on understanding the systems behind them, bringing the right people together, and investing in solutions designed to put people over politics and work for the long term. Nowhere is that more apparent than in one of his signature priorities: education.

EDUCATION WITH A DESTINATION Public and higher education became a major focus for Wilson after he was elected to the Texas House. As Chairman of the House Appropriations Subcommittee on Article III in 2021, he helped oversee the portion of the state budget responsible for public and higher education—more than one third of the entire Texas budget. But he has consistently argued that educational success should not be defined exclusively by a four-year college degree. His interest in vocational education began during his Army career. As an acquisition executive, Wilson was responsible for moving completed military research and development into production. He saw defense contractors rely on foreign partners 12

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because the United States lacked sufficient domestic production capacity and skilled workers. For him, the shortage was more than an economic concern; dependence on overseas manufacturing could also put American intellectual property and national security at risk. That experience became a catalyst for his efforts to expand Career and Technical Education in Texas. During his tenure as Article III chairman, Wilson helped direct major investments toward P-TECH programs that allow schools to partner with community colleges, technical colleges, and industry. Students can

AT A GLANCE RETIRED U.S. ARMY COLONEL 32 years of service • Decorated Combat Veteran TEXAS STATE REPRESENTATIVE House District 20 LEADER IN THE TEXAS HOUSE Chairman, House Committee on Higher Education FOCUS AREAS Education & Workforce • Higher Education Property Taxes • Defense & Veterans • Infrastructure Disaster Preparedness PERSONAL Married to Shannon for 30 years and father to William, a 2nd Lieutenant in the US Army, and Benjamin, a member of the TAMU Corps of Cadets. Rep. Wilson earned a BS in Business Administration from Texas A&M University and an MS in Strategic Logistics Plans and Management from the Air War University.

TEXAS SIT-REP

Identify what Texas will need next, bring the pieces together, and start building before the need becomes a crisis. explore careers as early as seventh grade and work toward certifications, college credit, associate degrees, and workforce experience while still in school. The goal, he has said repeatedly, is to give students multiple pathways to success while ensuring workforce programs correspond to jobs Texas actually need. That philosophy continues today. Recent state investments include approximately $850 million in a permanent Texas State Technical College endowment, as well as programs supporting equipment and short-term training for high-demand careers. Wilson also advocates greater cooperation among school districts, colleges, workforce boards, and employers rather than asking students to navigate separate systems on their own. Providing that education, advising, and opportunity requires training and retaining highly qualified educators, which is why he has helped pass and fund $4.2 billion this past session to provide raises and competitive salaries for educators statewide.

PROTECTING TEXAS’ FUTURE Wilson’s military background is also evident in his work on defense, emergency preparedness, and higher education research. During his time as Chairman of the House Committee on Defense & Veterans’ Affairs, Wilson focused on protecting Texas military installations while strengthening the communities surrounding them. His priorities have included military family quality of life, professional license portability for military spouses, preventing encroachment around installations, and ensuring Texas remains positioned to attract new military missions. The same emphasis on preparedness extends to natural disasters. Wilson has advocated stronger coordination among local responders and state agencies and, following devastating 2025 Hill Country floods, served on the Select Committee on Disaster Preparedness and Flooding. He carried legislation in the House requiring outdoor warning sirens in flash-flood-prone areas and supported stronger emergency planning for youth camps. Now as Chairman of Higher Education, his work similarly connects economic growth with national security. Wilson helped lay groundwork for the Texas University Fund, which established a $1 billion investment fund to support university research. More recently, he authored and passed HB 127, creating a Research Security Council to help Texas institutions protect sensitive research and intellectual property from foreign threats.  O C TO B E R 2 0 2 6  7 6 5 3 7 L I F E

TEXAS SIT-REP

GROWTH WITH ACCOUNTABILITY

appraisals, arguing that meaningful relief requires addressing the appraisal process that drives tax bills higher.

Closer to home, Wilson has also focused on problems created by Central Texas’ extraordinary growth. In Williamson County, that includes the rapid expansion of aggregate production operations—the quarries and facilities supplying the sand, gravel, and crushed stone for roads and construction. He has pushed for reforms addressing air quality, noise, traffic safety, groundwater use, setbacks, and reclamation while acknowledging the industry’s importance to a growing state.

Wilson has also backed efforts to reduce burdensome regulations on small businesses, which he describes as the heart of the Texas economy. On top of having passed the first meaningful property tax reforms focused on small businesses, his approach connects fewer regulatory costs with local job creation and relief from the rising expenses facing employers and consumers alike.

That balance is characteristic of his approach: economic growth and infrastructure are necessary, but so are accountability, responsible use of taxpayer dollars, and protection of communities affected by that growth. Across issues as different as school finance, skilled trades, military readiness, research security, disaster planning, property taxes, and infrastructure, a common thread emerges from Wilson’s years in office. The mission may change, but the method is familiar: identify what Texas will need next, bring the pieces together, and start building before the need becomes a crisis.

AFFORDABILITY AND ECONOMIC OPPORTUNITY As Central Texas grows, Wilson has emphasized the importance of ensuring families and small businesses can afford to grow with it. Reducing the burden of property taxes remain central to that effort. He also supports reining in rapidly rising home

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Energy and insurance costs are part of the same challenge. Wilson supports expanding energy production to lower utility bills and prices at the pump, as well as curbing lawsuit abuse that he says contributes to higher health, home, and automobile insurance premiums. He also helped pass the constitutional amendment permanently prohibiting a state income tax in Texas. As new industries reshape the region, Wilson has called for local data centers to be held accountable for their effects on surrounding communities. For Wilson, attracting investment must go hand in hand with protecting taxpayers, managing costs, and ensuring economic growth improves residents’ quality of life.

PROPERTY TAX Property taxes can be complicated, but Rep. Wilson helps make sense of the numbers, policies, and decisions that affect local property owners. Scan the code to review SIT-REP articles and insights on property taxes in one feed.

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BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT

BUILT FOR BUSINESS

by A nn Ma r i e Ke nno n

INVESTED IN JARRELL

or Barry Cryer, Jarrell Industrial Park has always been about more than buildings. It is a place where business owners can put down roots, tradespeople can earn a living, and local success can help support the community around it.

custom windows and doors, granite countertops, sheet metal, and welding services. Together, they bring jobs, useful services, and opportunities for everyone from fresh high school graduates to experts with trade and technical skills.

The park’s September 4 grand reopening celebrated the finishing touches on a vision that began during COVID and broke ground in 2021. Five buildings provide 25,000 square feet for manufacturing, fabrication, distribution, and other businesses. Its recent facelift brings fresh pavement, renewed parking lots, and essential infrastructure to help those businesses operate and grow.

Barry also takes particular pride in the sales tax revenue those businesses generate to help support Williamson County Emergency Services District No. 5, which serves the Jarrell community. A former longtime ESD board member, he understands how much reliable funding matters to local emergency services. “To help them was really an honor to me,” he says.

The interior road, previously dirt, is now paved with ribbon curbing. Parking lots have been repaired, resurfaced, and restriped, giving the property a fresh appearance. Septic installations and a new stormwater pond represent another substantial investment in the park’s functionality and responsible stewardship. “It looks like a whole new facility,” Barry says. For tenants, those improvements mean much more than curb appeal and Wrap Genius offers a particularly good example. Preparing vehicles for wraps requires clean surfaces, and the former dirt entrance could leave a freshly cleaned vehicle dusted before work began. Paving removes that daily obstacle.

The fire department’s presence at the reopening made that connection especially meaningful, alongside the Chamber members who gathered to celebrate. With convenient access to Interstate 35, insulated buildings, secured yards, and improvements shaped by tenants’ actual needs, Jarrell Industrial Park gives businesses room to build their futures. Barry’s persistence has created a place where their progress benefits Jarrell, too. Contact Barry (info below) for space available in the industrial park, or other areas in and around Jarrell and Sonterra.

Barry’s attention to the company’s needs also influenced the original building design. When he learned that wrapping tractor-trailers could require removing components to fit through smaller entrances, he chose 14-by-14-foot doors. “I’ll just make our doors a little bit bigger since we’re designing it,” he recalls. That willingness to listen reflects his concern for each tenant’s success. A cabinet manufacturer has grown with access to the space it needed, while other tenants provide

I am so thankful that my wife and my partners saw the vision and were willing to take this ride with us. ~Barry Cryer 18

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by Camy Reyn olds

THE REAL DEAL

ACRLONG TIME COMING 314 Improvements Are Moving Forward

AFTER YEARS OF NAVIGATING NARROW LANES, SHARP TURNS AND POTHOLES, JARRELL AND SONTERRA RESIDENTS HAVE A REASON TO CELEBRATE.

f you’ve ever driven County Road 314 in Sonterra, you know the drill: slow down for the potholes, navigate the winding roadway, and hope there isn't another vehicle coming from the opposite direction when you reach that particularly sharp turn where only one car can pass at a time. For years, this has been part of everyday life for Sonterra residents. As the community has continued to grow, so has the need for improvements to one of its most frequently traveled roads. Now, a long-awaited project is moving forward, and there’s reason to celebrate. Originally included in Williamson County’s 2019 Road Bond Program, the CR 314 improvement project has been years in the making. With the design process and negotiations with affected property owners helping pave the way, the project is reaching an important milestone. Williamson County Commissioner Russ Boles says cooperation between the county, landowners and developers has been an important part of moving the project forward. “Every roadway project requires the County to work with the property owners and developers, and CR 314 is no different,” Boles said. “After lengthy discussions, the County and the landowners were able to come to an agreement to get this project started. I appreciate their willingness to work with the County on this important improvement.”

SAFER FOR A GROWING COMMUNITY

are among the fastest-growing and most dynamic locations in the county, and I am committed to making sure it continues to be a safe place for residents to live and raise their families,” the Commissioner said.

WHAT’S NEXT FOR CR 314? While residents are eager to see improvements to the roadway, the project is approaching an important milestone. Williamson County will celebrate the beginning of utility relocation work with a community groundbreaking ceremony on Saturday, October 31, at Igo Elementary. Utility relocation is an essential step before road construction can begin. The county anticipates advertising for construction bids in spring 2027, with construction expected to begin that summer. The project is scheduled for completion in summer 2028.

A CELEBRATION FOR THE COMMUNITY Williamson County is inviting the community to join in a family-friendly Halloween celebration. For Sonterra and Jarrell residents, this groundbreaking represents more than the beginning of another road project. It’s a milestone years in the making for a community that has grown tremendously and waited patiently for improvements to one of its most important roadways. And on Halloween morning (Saturday, October 31), families will have an opportunity to come together and celebrate a major step toward a safer, more accessible CR 314 and a stronger future for the community they call home.

For the families who call Jarrell, Sonterra, and Cool Water home, CR 314 is part of their daily routine, connecting neighborhoods, schools, and the places they travel every day. Planned improvements will widen the existing twolane roadway to three lanes, including a continuous center turn lane and shoulders. The project extends from north IH-35 frontage road to west of CR 315. For Russ, it represents an investment in the families who depend on the roadway. “CR 314 is an important project to the citizens of Jarrell and Sonterra and Cool Water MUDs. It will make their commutes safer and easier and I think parents should have dinner with their families, not be stuck in traffic.” As residential development continues throughout the area, improvements to existing infrastructure are increasingly important. “Jarrell and the surrounding developments O C TO B E R 2 0 2 6  7 6 5 3 7 L I F E

WORTH THE DRIVE

by Ch a r lot te Kova lc h u k • p h otos c ou rte s y S u z i e Ha r ley

TOYS AND TERROR SCARE for a CURE Offers One-of-a-Kind Haunted Adventure for a Cause

n a sweltering Sunday morning in August, a mother and daughter are creating rainbows out of colorful pool noodles for a Barbie-themed children’s room. Another volunteer is hooking up a bag of fake blood to a set of sprinklers. Elsewhere, a few volunteers have just finished setting up a room centered on a familiar childhood game with a creepy twist. For several months each year, a group of dedicated volunteers descend on a rustic set of buildings in Manor 45 minutes southeast of Georgetown. By October, months of planning, building, and rehearsing culminate in SCARE for a CURE’s annual haunted house adventure where, this year, childhood nostalgia takes a decidedly darker turn. Since 2007, SCARE for a CURE has transformed its haunted house into a variety of dark, imaginative worlds, from zombies and demons to clowns and twisted fairy tales. This fall, guests are invited to Terror Toys—a Halloween bash hosted by one of the world’s best toy makers, who is preparing to unveil the most lifelike toy ever created. But once they enter the toy maker’s world, things aren’t quite what they seem. Unlike other haunted houses, SCARE for a CURE’s doesn’t involve simply walking from room to room while waiting for actors to jump out from behind doors. Instead, guests become the main characters in a story. The approximately hourlong guided experience unfolds around them as they travel through various rooms, discover clues, and interact with characters. They might crawl, climb, jump, and squeeze their way through each room—all while getting covered (wear your yard work clothes!) in plenty of blood and gore along the way. Despite the organization’s name, the experience “is more a fun story-driven haunted adventure than scary,” volunteer Suzie Harley says.

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TURNING SCARES INTO SUPPORT For SCARE for a CURE, the scares have always been about something bigger. Since its founding in 2007, the organization has paired its Halloween adventure with philanthropy. The organization has donated more than $750,000 to charitable causes, including support for the Breast Cancer Resource Center, local schools, food banks, and other community organizations. In 2025 alone, SCARE raised $55,000 for the Breast Cancer Resource Center, $20,000 in scholarships, distributed $5,750 each to five charities nominated by volunteers, plus $1,000 to two charities to honor two late, long-time volunteers. That charitable mission is made possible by a large, closeknit volunteer community. SCARE for a CURE brings together people from all walks of life and include software engineers, artists, retired teachers, police detectives, firefighters, doctors, lawyers, and students. Some come to lend their acting skills. Others prefer working behind the scenes and build sets, paint backdrops, make costumes, create special ef-

WORTH THE DRIVE

fects, or brainstorm annual themes and story lines. There are volunteers who have been part of SCARE for more than 20 years, while others came for a school service project and end up becoming part of the SCARE for a CURE family.

spent decades helping create the annual haunted adventure. “You have a mind, we’ll find something for you to do,” says SCARE for a CURE’s marketing manager, Callie Kokajko.

Suzie, who has volunteered with the organization for 14 years and serves as its special effects manager and one of its board members, helped bring the toy-themed world to life.

BEFORE YOU GO Fridays/Saturdays through Oct 30 (closed Halloween), $50 per person. Oct 22 and 29, $40 per person. Tours begin at 7:45, check the website for latest tours.

“You’re interacting with familiar toys, instantly recognizable and beloved, although in this environment sometimes things go horribly wrong,” she says. “This is where we turn small electronic toys into nightmares.”

Old West Market • 14219 Littig Rd, Manor

The organization welcomes volunteers with all abilities and experience. Some work in wheelchairs and others are in their 80s. Some are first-time volunteers, while others have

Refreshments and merch at the venue.

Approximately one hour; recommend ages 13 and older Attire: comfortable clothes you won't mind getting covered in blood and gore. “Some guests dress in all white to see how much they get on them,” Callie says. Scan the code for more information about tickets and show dates.

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NEIGHBOR LEIGH

THE FLURBENKNOCKER PROBLEM

ctober traditionally seems to invite witches into the conversation. But rather than wade into the annual debate over costumes, candy, and spooky supernatural things, I thought we'd go Biblical about it. Leigh had this epiphany a few weeks ago when her chronological Bible reached Ezekiel — arguably one of the weirdest books in the Bible. He is, after all, the prophet who opens with numinous fourfaced, four-winged creatures traveling alongside wheels within wheels covered in eyes. And just when you think you've adjusted to his particular brand of WTH, chapter 13 introduces women practicing divination with mysterious things sewn onto their arms and equally mysterious coverings on their heads. My Bible helpfully footnotes these with some version of, “The meaning of the Hebrew word is unclear.” Which is unfortunate. We 21st-century people aren't super tolerant of unanswered questions. I have access to nearly the whole of accumulated human knowledge in my pocket, so when I want to know what an obscure Hebrew veil looked like, I expect someone, somewhere, to have an answer. Never mind that this particular detail has absolutely no bearing on salvation. Leigh is nothing if not a "but I still must know" kind of person. Apparently everybody in the sixth century BC knew what Ezekiel was talking about, so nobody thought to leave instructions for those of us arriving 2,600 years later. For all we know, everyone in his little corner of Babylonia would flash a patronizing smile and explain, "Oh, that's a flurbenknocker." Perhaps the length of one's flurbenknocker indicated rank. Apprentice diviners wore a modest eight-inch model. Experienced sorceresses earned shoulder-length flurbenknockers, and Grand Mistress soul hunters trailed six feet of fabric behind them so they could demand significantly larger handfuls of barley. For the record, there is absolutely no biblical or archaeological support for the Flurbenknocker Seniority and Barley Compensation Schedule. The barley, however, is real. Ezekiel says these women profaned God for “handfuls of barley and scraps of bread.” Whatever their mysterious accessories were, apparently women could survive on divination fees and get paid in groceries. I was thinking about this while working at my computer, producing intangible things so clients can pay me via an invisible signal that changes numbers in my bank account. I then use those numbers to purchase things like wireless

by A nn Ma r i e Ke nno n

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data—which I also can't see, eat, wear, or sleep under. Suddenly, getting paid in barley doesn't seem so dumb. In fact, imagine archaeologists 2,600 years from now trying to reconstruct my life from fragments of surviving text: “I spent all morning working in Photoshop and when the wi-fi went out, I put on my Skechers, filled my Yeti, and ordered DoorDash for lunch.” Everyone reading that sentence in 2026 knows exactly what happened. But our future scholars might spend decades debating the ritual function of the “shop of photos,” if Skechers were new divination accessories, why a Himalayan Bigfoot might in fact be empty of anything, and whether DoorDash was some defunct sporting competition focused on food. Eventually someone would publish an uppity paper concluding: “The precise societal worship of wi-fi remains unclear.” Poor Ezekiel never knew he needed footnotes. Neither do we, because we assume the people reading our words live in our world and understand our flurbenknockers. Maybe that's worth remembering when ancient Scripture sounds especially strange. These people weren't just characters in a Bible story. They got dressed, went to work, bought food, used slang, followed trends, and understood cultural references nobody bothered to explain. Their world made perfect sense to them. And I'm pretty sure ours will eventually sound completely bonkers too.

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ECRWSS POSTAL PATRON JARRELL, TX P.O. Box 213, Jarrell. TX, 76537