2020 Edition Six

FARRAGO EDITION SIX 2020

Acknowledgement of Country Cultural warning for mentions of the destruction of sacred sites and Aboriginal deaths in custody. Content warning for police brutality and racism.

This has been a trying year, with events of competing urgency following each other endlessly. Without intending to exclude or sidestep other issues, we wish to highlight some ways settlers like us can take action against the ongoing problems that First Nations communities face as a result of the settler colonial system.

In June of this year, people in Naarm (Melbourne) rallied in solidarity with the American protests that were catalysed by the murder of George Floyd. The search for justice resonated here, as so-called Australia is similarly rife with issues of institutional racism and police brutality, as well as the disproportionately high rates of Aboriginal deaths in custody. While the social media momentum for the Bla(c)k Lives Matter movement has been diluted for many, the underlying issues remain.

If you have the means, here is a non-exhaustive list of the campaigns and organisations you can donate to.

Clothing the Gap is an Aboriginal-owned and -led social enterprise based in Victoria. It produces merchandise for both Indigenous peoples and settlers to purchase.

The Djab Wurrung Heritage Protection Embassy aims at protecting the sacred birthing trees on Djab Wurrung country. While the Djab Wurrung community won an injunction to stop the Victorian Government from continuing work on the highway project, the Victorian Supreme Court will resume discussions on November 19.

Gunawirra is an organisation in NSW dedicated to empowering young Indigenous mothers. It emphasises healing for intergenerational trauma, as well as cultural knowledge and art for maternal nurturing.

The Healing Foundation is a national organisation dedicated to researching Indigenous healing and addressing the ongoing trauma faced by Indigenous peoples.

The Indigenous Literacy Fund promotes Indigenous literacy through the provision of books in both English and Indigenous languages.

The Pay the Rent Grassroots Collective focuses on restitution for Indigenous peoples. It advocates for settlers to honour the sovereignty of First Nations peoples, and recognise the stolen lands on which they live.

Yalari is a non-profit organisation offering secondary education scholarships for Indigenous children from regional, rural and remote communities.

Bethany Cherry Boon Wurrung Land of the Kulin Nations.

Amber Meyer Wurundjeri Land of the Kulin Nations.

Sarah Peters Boon Wurrung Land of the Kulin Nations.

Tharidi Walimunige Wurundjeri Land of the Kulin Nations.

EDITORS

Amber Meyer Bethany Cherry Sarah Peters Tharidi Walimunige

COVER

Franki Stackpool

SOCIAL MEDIA

Ailish Hallinan Anoushka Arora Cat Ingham Emma McCarthy Helena Wang Isabella Ross Janelle Wong Joy Ong Ly Luong Natasha Jose Kalath

ILLUSTRATORS

Alice Tai Anya Wong Annette Syahlani Arielle Vlahiotis Cathy Chen Elmira Cheung Franki Stackpool Geraldine Loh Kitman Yeung Michelle Pham Yuk Kei Lo Yuki Phuong Ngo Phoebe Owl Rohith Prabhu Rose Gertsakis Reann Lin Stephanie Nestor Sue Park Vivian Li Yena Kim Zino Feng Steph Markerink Nina Hughes Torsten Strokirch Apapist Panichewa Sidonie Bird De La Coeur Jing Tong Teo

CONTRIBUTORS

Abby Yelland Ailish Hallinan Ana Jacobsen Annie Rose Angelina Koh Ariyo Ahmad Bethany Joyce Birdy Carmen Charlotte Armstrong Dannielle Thorman Elizabeth Seychell Elyssia Koulouris Emily White Finley Tobin Franki Stackpool Gabbi Lobo Jesse Skerritt Joanna Zou Lauren Berry Margarita Bassova Mark Yin Meredith Tyler Nat Hollis Nicole Hegedus Paris O’Rourke Pavani Athukorala Poppy Willis Rayanne Margi Sarah Peters Teck-Phui Chua Vanessa Lee

MUSIC TEAM Lauren Berry

SUBEDITORS

Ailish Hallinan Allen Xiao Amelia Costigan Anindya Setiawan Asher Harrington Charlotte Waters Claire Yip Dana Pjanic Elizabeth Seychell Evelyn Ranogajec Felicity Lacey Finley Tobin Janelle Del Vecchio Jo Oakley Lindsay Wong Lucette Moulang Marcie Di Bartolomeo Mark Yin Markella Votzourakis Nicole Moore Nishtha Banavalikar Noa Abrahams Nurul Juhria Binte Kamal Poppy Willis Pavani Athukorala Rebecca Fletcher Rohith Prabhu Shahrizad Zaina Choudhury Stephanie Zhang Tessa Marshall Tiia Kelly Tom Shute Victoria Thompson Wen Yee Ang

MANAGERS

Emma McCarthy Finley Tobin Iain Soumitri Lauren Berry

COLUMNIST

Elmira Cheung Klesa Wilson Lee Perkins Tessa Bagshaw Tessa Marshall Tzur Ko-Geen Rochvarger Sunnie Meg Wendy Lin

ONLINE COLUMNIST Annalyce Wiebenga Shaira Afrida Oyshee

PHOTOGRAPHY

Abir Hiranandani Ailish Hallinan Alicia Christabella Andreas Alice Tai Andy Xu Ben Levy Ella Davidson Finley Tobin Helena Wang Jean Baulch Jing Tong Teo Jocelyn Deane Kashish Sandhu Ly Luong Mingyu Tan Nguyen Nguyen Rida Fatima Virk Stephanie Zhang

EVENTS

Kashish Sandhu Lian Ren

WEB DESIGN TEAM Wei Wang

This magazine is made from 30% recycled paper, excluding the cover and gloss pages, which are 99% recycled. Please recycle this magazine after use.

Farrago is the newspaper of the University of Melbourne Student Union (UMSU). Farrago is published by the General Secretary. The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of UMSU.

Art by Birdy Carmen

CONTENTS

SECTION TITLE

03 04 03 04 06 06 08 08 10 09 10 11 12 12 13

Editorial Dealyed Response to Feature ArtLeaves UNIMELB COVID-19 Birdy Carmen Exchange Students Stranded Thank You Alessandra Akerley Editorial October Calendar UMSU Election Overview OB Reports Sarah Peters Secret Space Spaces: Brain The George Paton Gallery Dannielle Thorman Lisa Jacomos Studying Through COVID: A Letter The Editors How TheTo Pandemic Has Pavani Ambagahwattha Impacted The University “Vague and Confusing” Experience Students challenged by online Lisa Jacomos Delivery of STEM subjects ICYMI: Joanna Guelas COVID-19 Subject Scores to Feature Arton Student Transcripts Still Appear

Torsten Strokirch Ailish Hallinan and Lauren Berry

Art 14 Feature Spoon Villiages and Paris O’Rourke Gardens Community Jasper MacCuspie 15 Arts Sector Continues to face 16 Challenges Secret Spaces: during COVID-19 The University of Melbourne Pandemic Joanna Guelas Food Co-Op Athukorala 16 Pavani University on Track to Meet 18 Sustainabilty Summer Break Calendar Goals Despite 19 Waste 2021 Media Team Setbacks Applications 20 OB LucyReports Turton 22 Suburban 17 Feature ArtMum Distressed Zino Feng That Neo-Nazi Slightly Mishandled Dog 18 Winners Never Can Quit Pavani Athukorala Georgia Lenton-Williams

23 Local ocal Man Woman Terrified 20 Aghast After y Small Spark Of Optimism Within Self Discovering How Much Charlotte Armstrong Work His wife Does Around 24 The University Executives To Start House Wearing Ear Masks To Protect Pavani Athukorala Themselves From Listening To 21 Staring Into The Eyes of Students Many To Know Lauren Strangers Berry Oneself 25 The 5 Stages of Failing a Driving Test Rebecca Fletcher Rayanne Margi

22 The Rot At The Heart Of Higher 26 2 Audiobook Reviews, in Which Education There are 5 Recommendations, the Sakia Peachey Whole Thing is Split into 4 Parts and Bro I am Just Vibing.

Nat Hollis

X

23 An Ode To An Arts Degree

57 Living Creatures

28 ofWith White Feminism 24 The TheDangers Problem Gabbi Lobo Marginalised Narratives 30 Under Water

56 witches 58 The OTHER Theory of Annie Rose Evolution 57 Feature Art

26 iEntitled To Powerstreet 32 miss smanston 28 Photography Hygge.

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59 Art 58 Feature Lonely Hearts of the Animal Steph Markerink Kingdom 60 Tessa a moment to swim inside Bagshaw Charlotte Waters 60 TWENTIES in the 21st Century 61 The Shipwreck Question

41 33 42

62 Bad-Ass Women: 62 Feature Art Franki ChingStackpool Shih Sunnie 64 On theMeg Outside Looking In: Democratising Literary Festivals 64 The Night Places Jemma Payne Post-Pandemic Ana Jacobsen 66 The Gaze 65 where Su Park were you when i was still kind? Art 67 Feature

Esther Suckling

Jesslyn Soegito Mark Yin Lexi Herbert Joanne Zou

Kate Abir Fleming Hiranandani 30 Noise Pollution Ella Davidson Tallulah Frigo Finley Tobin Jean Baulch 31 Feature Art Ming Yu Tan Alex burns Kashish 32 FeatureSandhu Art

When There Was Peace Jean Baulch Ariyo Ahmad Photography Fallen Ben Levy Ariyo Jean Ahmad Baulch

43 Surrender Rida Fatima of Virkthe Seasons Poppy Willis Ming Yu Tan

Kashish Sandhu 44 The Allure of the Past When The Abir Hirandani Present’s a Bit Grim 41 An Ode Seychell To Overthinking Elizabeth 46 Choices A Third Culture Kid’s Experience: Sensing Your Belonging Klesa Wilson Klesa Wilson 42 balikbayan/body 48 The Curtain Eleanor Ho Calls For Your To Think: 43 camouflage Doing Moulang It Right Lucette Tzur Ko-Geen 44 Dear Hope Rochvarger 50 A Puppet Megan Tan with Wings Margarita Bassova 46 Lonely Hearts of The 52 Grandmother Rose Animal Kingdom ElyssiaBagshaw Koulouris Tessa

53 48 Feature TwentiesArt in the 21st Century Dannielle Thorman Elmira Cheung

54 50 snowshoe All Throughhare a Window Meredith Tyler Mehar Jaitely

55 ptarmigan 51 La Hija Del Mar Y Del Sol

Alexandra McAuliff

Tessa marshall Bethany Joyce

IsabelleCheung Rieger Elmira

BirdyHiranandani Carmen Abir

66 ‘Close’ 68 Flashfiction: ‘Winter Wonder’ Assorted Wendy Linauthors

68 Lit 70 Trash The Cherryman: Emily White Inasmuch as the Road Forks 70 Bad-Ass Women: Here Agrippina Lee Perkins the Younger Sunnie Meg 72 Battle Of The Sneakers 72 The Cherryman: Anoushka Arora Roots of 74 little lady Balm and Toil Lee Perkins Lucette Moulang

74 Art Calls 75 Feature The Curtain

Paris O’RourkeRochvarger Tzur Ko-Geen

76 Plants VS OutdoorofPlants 76 Indoor a brief coming together Abbie Yellend bodies 78 Death...Rebirth Emily White Wendy Lin

77 Queer Online Birthday in 78 Show Off Quarantine Angelina Koh Jocelyn Deane

Meredith Tyler Mehar Jaitely

81 Radio Fodder Playlist 78 Volunteering From Home Radio Fodder Music Team

Charlotte Armstrong

80 Flashfiction: ‘Cycle’

Lauren O’Connell

81 Radio Fodder Playlist

52 Horoscopes 54 5:45

56 Intra Uterine Insertion Meredith Tyler

Illustrated by Geraldine Loh

Lucy Williamsn

Assorted authors

Radio Fodder Music Team

EDITORIAL

Art by Birdy Carmen

3

THA

Readers We know that getting copies this year was harder than ever. But every single person who came to a launch, who looked at the digital mag or waited patiently for the Wordpress upload — you are so important. And, to each of you who ordered a physical copy, or is waiting to collect one next year, we really appreciate your commitment.

Hold onto these ones, they’re bound to be collector copies in post-COVID history classes.

Contributors To all who filled our inboxes with a wealth of content, we are in awe of your talent and growth this year. You are the magazine, and we’re so honoured to be the ones sharing your words and art. It’s been an absolute pleasure bridging you and your creations and watching from the side as you take your ideas to the other side. Thank you for your patience with us. Thank you for your unwavering support. Thank you for everything.

Subeditors Our three teams: News, Nonfiction and Creative. You’ve endured weird deadlines and late-night emails, did your training during bushfire smoke hanging over the city, and subedited through a pandemic. We owe to you every single comma, every single unspaced em dash we ignored in the proofing process and our hearts. We will never be able to give you enough credit for all the time you have volunteered. Thank you.

Illustrators This team is a farrago of hard work, raw talent and creative stamina. From your first commission to now, you have all become some of the most passionate artists and unique creatives on campus. One only needs eyes to see it. Like masters of a maze, we have watched as you navigated the parameters of your role: respecting the authors, responding to the audience, and always finding the best way through. We have learnt so much from you and you make Farrago the tangible beauty it is today.

Columnists We are in awe of the messages, the stories and humour in each of your pieces. You stuck by us when deadlines were destroyed and we were forced off campus. We are in awe of how your writing and art has developed across six editions to amalgamate into a beautiful expression of yourselves. Thank you for your hard work.

Managers Alain Nguyen: You are a legacy member of the media community and we are eternally proud of you for each step you have taken this year, not just for the video team but for yourself.

Ed Pitt: Thank you for taking on Radio Fodder again when we found ourselves without a manager trying to get shows running during the pandemic on a system we’d never used. Literally, how are you real?

Emma McCarthy: We thought we knew how to use social media until we met you! The creativity and energy you put into timelines and into insta stories made us glow. Thank you for your patience and ideas. You have been a blessing to befriend.

Finley Tobin: A manager of photography or pasta, you decide. We’re in awe of the community you’ve built with your team, reminding us all how photography is an art form. You supported us through this year. We have learnt more from you about leadership then we will ever be able to tell you. The only thing we can say is, thank you Finley.

Iain Soumitri: You popped up just when we needed you. Thank you for taking the reins of the video team and bringing a passion and stamina the Media Department hadn’t seen for years. You will go far. Thank you for what you did for us and the video team.

Lauren Berry: Thank you for keeping the Fodder Blog and Music Teams alive. You bring passion, innovation and cool vibes to each space. We are so excited to see where you go next!

Printgraphics Printgreen The Farrago Office has printed with you for over a decade. While we are moving on, we will be forever grateful for what you have done for us and the students.

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ANK

Photography Team There are normal, functional teams and then there’s you guys; the pasta obsessed photography group. The gloss pages in the center of the Farrago magazine mark the importance photography has in the lives of students. We are all alive for a single moment, and you have been there to capture it, record it and comment on it. From the shiny glossy pages, to the serious we-need-it-in-two-hours online articles, the photography team has never let us down.

Video Team Bourbon on the rocks is this team’s spirit drink. We went from a fiery start to a rocky middle to a satisfactory ending. This team deserves the recognition for the year that was not. This team has gone through manager change-overs, loss of content and equipment, and no on-campus coverage. You got through it and made Farrago Video proud. Thank you.

Lindsay Wong, Anya Wong, Rose Gersakis, Kitman Yeung, Yena Kim & the Creative Arts Department Above Water this year was somehow just as exquisite, just as flawless as the years before. Thank you to editorial assistant Lindsay Wong for her impeccable mastery of all things administrative. Thank you to the Above Water illustration team Anya, Rose, Kitman and Yena. Thank you to Liv and Em for our heated debates over pizza and pregnancy.

Goldie Pergl & Sarah Black What we would give to run up and down all those flights of stairs to come and ask you one more question about something we could’ve emailed. Thank you for your kindness, for navigating the money, for plant welfare, snacks and friendship this year.

UMSU Communications Team You supported us through some weird things and we just loved expanding our Level Four relationship to you all, sneaking into the office spaces with weird Wordpress issues and more. We hope this relationship can continue to develop.

Proofreaders So many of you came to that first proof before we were sucked into lockdown! So many of you! And so many of you remained to tell us where we forgot or added too many commas. Thank you for dealing with the strangest type of proofing ever online.

Mohamed Hadi, Shanysa McConville, Hope Kuchel & Jessie Ferrari The First Nations & POC in Media collective required so much time and heart, and the four of you were instrumental in its success. The fight for greater representation in Farrago, and media in general, is ongoing. However, we have made great strides this year thanks to your help.

Weekly Workshop students This was a new initiative this year and it was one of the most rewarding events the Media Office had the pleasure to run. To the students who attended, a special message: you supported each other, you contributed, you were connected. This is what creation is about. Reveling in the moment, trying something new without fear of failure and listening, practising. We hope you pass on these lessons.

Editors Past & Future We’ve been honoured talking to editors from 2019 and 2018 as we work out how to run things (and in a pandemic!). We would not have survived this without you all and your documents, handovers and feedback. Further, we want to thank and welcome in the new team: Ailish, Elmira, Lauren and Pavani. We know that you’re going to do fantastic work and we cannot wait to see what you bring to the table!

Our Community Our friends and family, the members of the media collective and every single person who sent us an email whilst we were just trying to keep our heads up — you are important. Your support, comments, questions and feedback keep us going.

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Bethany Cherry Cherry Bethany the beginning, beginning, this this team team had had big big plans. plans. cribbled cribbled all all over over our our office office whiteboards. whiteboards. nn March March this this year, year, there there was was nn the complete breakdown breakdown of of the the social social infrastructure infrastructure we we had had been been relying relying on. on. We We adapted. adapted. tudents tudents contributed, contributed, aa complete students collaborated, collaborated, and and students students turned turned their their struggles struggles into into aa tool tool for for building. building. This This year year we we put put the the media media students community to to the the test. test. The The result: result: four four exhausted exhausted editors, editors, magnificent magnificent managers, managers, beautiful beautiful publications, publications, community terrific teams, teams, controversial council council meetings meetings and and collective members, members, and and aa partridge partridge in in aa pear pear tree. tree. tt terrific controversial collective makes me me unapologetically unapologetically proud proud to to have have worked worked with with some some of of the the strongest strongest students students in in the the world. world. nn the the face face makes of aa time time where where experience experience and and training training no no longer longer applied, applied, they they used used their their intuition, intuition, creativity creativity and and passion passion to to of make this this year year happen. happen. make Amber Meyer Meyer Amber The Farrago editorial editorial team team trialled trialled something something brand brand new new that that uni uni uely uely worked worked for for us. us. We We had had joint joint editors editors The Farrago for the three written sections, News, Nonfiction and Creative.

This decision re ected the skills we possessed and, for the three written sections, News, Nonfiction and Creative. This decision re ected the skills we possessed and, through the growing pains, we made it work.

Thank you to arah for their willingness to learn the ropes with me, through the growing pains, we made it work. Thank you to arah for their willingness to learn the ropes with me, and to manage a team whose reporting talent ’m still trying to replicate for myself.

Thank you, as well, to Tharidi and to manage a team whose reporting talent ’m still trying to replicate for myself. Thank you, as well, to Tharidi for honing honing the the nonfiction nonfiction process process down down to to aa practice practice of of perfection. perfection. t’s t’s been been aa privilege privilege to to work work on on both both the the News News for and Nonfiction teams this year. and Nonfiction teams this year.

Sarah Peters Peters Sarah tt the the start start of of our our term term we we were were on on campus, campus, had had grand grand ideas ideas for for launch launch parties, parties, events events and and aa functional functional timeline. timeline.

CO Dhas turned our entire maga ine upside down and put so many roadblocks in place. ut still, you have CO D- has turned our entire maga ine upside down and put so many roadblocks in place. ut still, you have endured.

You’ve sent hundreds of submissions, collected face masks and grown out your hair.

This edition marks endured. You’ve sent hundreds of submissions, collected face masks and grown out your hair. This edition marks a number of ends, for me, my postgraduate studies. verything is wild and confusing and ’d love nothing more a number of ends, for me, my postgraduate studies. verything is wild and confusing and ’d love nothing more than to to just just cocoon cocoon myself. myself. am am so so proud proud of of what what this this team team and and community community has has learnt learnt and and overcome overcome and and am am than thankful for this opportunity. ’ve met so many emerging creatives and can’t wait for your future endeavours to thankful for this opportunity. ’ve met so many emerging creatives and can’t wait for your future endeavours to warm my soul.

You are what student media is about. warm my soul. You are what student media is about.

Tharidi Walimunige Walimunige Tharidi s the youngest and shortest shortest member member of of the the editorial team, team, approaching approaching the the big big wide wide world world of of Farrago Farrago s the youngest and editorial and being entrusted to lead it left me with a swirl of nerves and excitement.

There was so much for me to learn learn and being entrusted to lead it left me with a swirl of nerves and excitement. There was so much for me to and experience, and in a year turned topsy-turvy by such unexpected chaos, my journey ended up being one of and experience, and in a year turned topsy-turvy by such unexpected chaos, my journey ended up being one of continual discovery and development. ’m eternally grateful to have had three brilliant co-editors riding into batcontinual discovery and development. ’m eternally grateful to have had three brilliant co-editors riding into battle with with me. me. Thank Thank you you to to arah, arah, mber mber and and ethany ethany for for all all the the ridiculous ridiculous puns, puns, snarky snarky rants, rants, sweet sweet treats, treats, movie movie tle recommendations, cups of tea, video-call glitches, heart emojis, iconic clapbacks, and thoughtful check-ins. nd recommendations, cups of tea, video-call glitches, heart emojis, iconic clapbacks, and thoughtful check-ins. nd to those who read, contributed to and supported this maga ine, you made all of this worthwhile.

Thank you for to those who read, contributed to and supported this maga ine, you made all of this worthwhile. Thank you for suffusing our our office, office, and and then then our our homes, homes, with with lyrical lyrical words, words, enchanting enchanting art art and and enduring enduring passion. passion. suffusing Reader, this is a beginning, not an end.

Reader, this is a beginning, not an end.

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Illustrated by Sarah Peters

69

NEWS

UMSU Election Overview

Sarah Peters

A fter a successful online campaign, Community for UMSU has won a majority of the University of Mel-

bourne Student Union (UMSU) offices for 2021. Winning every office except for President and Education Public Affairs, the ticket appears to have survived a difficult postal election.

Stand Up!, a long-standing ticket that dominated office bearer positions this year, won just two offices.

Jack Buksh, the 2020 General Secretary, will become the union’s president in 2021, promising to continue fighting for student voices through accessibility, unionist and fee reduction campaigns. The only other office the ticket secured was Education Public Affairs (Tejas Gandhi and Hannah Krasovec).

Community, a brand new ticket this year, took the general secretariat (Ciara O’Sullivan) and the academic arm of the education office (Jennisha Arnanta and Planning Jay Vynn Saw). It also won almost all of the autonomous departments, which include Women’s (Mickhaella Ermita & Srishti Chatterjee), Queer (Amy Bright & Laura Ehrensperger), Disabilities (Brigit Doyle and Lindsay Tupper-Creed) and People of Colour (Emily AlRamadhan & Mohamed Hadi). Other offices secured by Community include Welfare (Allen Xiao and Hue Man Dang), Creative Arts (Merryn Hughes & Vaishnavi Ravikrishna) and Environment (Ann Nguyen & James Park).

Community successfully took the Activities office (Christos Preovolos & Phoebe Chen) and the Clubs and Societies office (Kalyana Vania & Muskaan Hakhu), despite opposition from independent ticket Just Clubs Just Activities (JCJA). It also won all coordinator positions for the Southbank campus—Campus Coordinator (Will Hall), Activities and Events Coordinator (Jungwoo Kim), and Campaigns Coordinator (Leyla Moxham).

Independent tickets and candidates that found success during this election were elected unopposed.

Kaitlyn Hammond has retained the campus coordinator position for the Burnley campus, and the Indigenous office was retained by independents Hope Kuchel and Shanysa McConville. Independent Media once again took the Media office (Ailish Hallinan, Elmira Cheung, Lauren Berry and Pavani Athukorala).

Results for committees and Students’ Council were dominated by Community’s candidates as well. After a year of a Stand Up! super-majority on Council, Community won its own super-majority, securing almost all of the special representative positions. Smaller tickets like JCJA and Student Resistance, despite not winning any offices even after making deals with Stand Up!, each took one seat on Students’ Council. Independent Media has returned to Council with one candidate as well, after failing to secure a seat in the 2019 elections.

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Independent candidate Brittney Hendersen also won a spot on Council as the Indigenous representative.

Despite this overwhelming win, Community appealed to the electoral tribunal to demand a recount of the votes for the presidential office. International ballots received on or before November 16 were included in another recount. The margin between Buksh and Community’s candidate Archit Agrawal did not change substantially.

This year, the election struggled more than ever with turnout, as the pandemic suppressed any chances of in-person voting. Since 2016, engagement in the UMSU election week has continued to decline. While 3,700 postal vote applications were recorded in late September, a vote tally after the election period from September 7 to 11 found fewer than 2,000 of those votes had been returned.

Deputy returning officer Stephen Luntz told Farrago that a 100 per cent return was unlikely.

“We’ve had quite a few come back [as] return-to-sender because people have moved, or they gave us the address incorrectly. We’ve tried contacting these people and sending to the correct address when they gave them to us, but many have not replied and a few told us they were no longer interested. It seems some people were persuaded to lodge applications at the time, but have since lost enthusiasm for one reason or another,” he said.

Frustration from earlier in the year about the postal vote has lingered. Several international students voiced their concerns on UMSU-affiliated Facebook groups in July. The postal vote was the only option available during the UMSU Elections with online voting prohibited in the constitution and requiring an Annual General Meeting of at least 400 students for the decision to be overturned. This has previously only been achievable during Tuesday’s free event ‘Bands ‘n’ Bevs.’

Online, President Hannah Buchan informed students that legalities and public health safety restrictions were significant components in this.

“These regulations show that UMSU was unprepared for this to happen and I will make sure to pass this information onto those who make the electoral regulations. All of your concerns are valid and can be used to change the constitution when UMSU is legally able to do so.”

International students were primarily concerned that their votes would not be received, relying heavily on postal delivery efficiency that has varied across the globe during the pandemic. Only five votes from overseas were included after Community’s appeal.

‘Space Brain’ by Dannielle Thorman

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NEWSTEXT SECTION

Studying Through Covid: How The Pandemic Has Impacted The University Experience Ailish Hallinan and Jesse Skerritt

T here’s no denying that this academic year has been unlike any that University of Melbourne students have

faced before. With the end of the year approaching, Farrago is rounding up how the year has impacted students and what lies ahead in 2021.

The most notable change for students this year was a rapid transition to online learning. Except for some medical and final-year students, students have not been permitted on campus since mid-March. The transition received mixed reactions from staff and students. While some appreciate the increased flexibility, most feel the quality of their education has suffered.

Riley Doran is in the final year of his Arts degree and struggled with transitioning online.

“Most of my classes have been really ill-prepared for being completely online and because staff are in the same boat of transitioning, there hasn’t really been any support in that area,” he said.

“Keeping ahead of assessments has been a real challenge . . . tutorials have started to feel more like home study than a typical class. It’s so overwhelming feeling like there’s so much online work to do when in person there is a balance between home study and in-person classes.”

Pavani Athukorala also struggled with the transition, particularly after leaving Melbourne to return home to Sri Lanka because of the pandemic. She has found it difficult to perform academically compared to in the past.

“As an international student I much prefer in-person classes,” she said.

“With online learning, I feel like I’m not getting what I paid for. It’s not what I signed up for.”

The University of Melbourne Student Union (UMSU) successfully ran two campaigns this year pressuring the University to provide students with academic amnesty during the pandemic. Two petitions created by UMSU received over 13,000 and 16,000 signatures respectively. As a result, subjects taken during 2020 that score below a student’s current average are not included in their Weighted Average Mark (WAM).

Both Doran and Athukorala reported feeling “grateful” for the WAM amnesty agreement, but still feel the University is failing to adequately support students during COVID-19.

Online learning has been doubly difficult for first year students, transitioning both to university and a digital campus. Margot Wilson moved from Tasmania to start her degree in Semester 1 and has found her first year “disappointing” and “strange”.

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“Meeting new people was definitely something I’d been looking forward to and now it’s been much harder to do,” she said.

“I feel really disconnected from the uni and from my classmates because I haven’t been on campus since week 3 of first semester and have made very few meaningful connections.”

“

I feel really disconnected from the uni and from my classmates because I haven’t been on campus since week 3 of first semester and have made very few meaningful connections.

“

While academic performance has been a key issue for students this year, so too has mental health. Farrago reported earlier this year on the mental health challenges facing international students as well as problems with university support services. Student mental health has been affected by isolation, academic pressure, and insufficient services. Professor Patrick McGorry from the Orygen Centre for Youth Mental Health is concerned that the pandemic will have a prolonged impact, predicting that COVID-19 will likely “scar” young people for the next 5-10 years.

It is uncertain what 2021 will look like for students.

The University continues to monitor government advice and will provide further details when re-enrolment opens in November. The return to campus will be phased in gradually, with a full return to on-campus learning rumoured not to occur until September 2021.

This transition back to campus is also complicated by uncertainty as to when international students can return to Australia. Athukorala is trying not to worry too much about 2021. “Next semester I have resigned myself to the mindset of what will happen, will happen,” she said.

Students can be certain that the University is planning to return to normal academic procedures in 2021. A spokesperson told Farrago: “We are planning for a more stable academic year within a new COVID-normal and therefore standard policy regarding Special Consideration, the WAM, attendance and participation requirements will be applied.”

Illustrated by Michelle Pham

The University did, however, commit to maintaining support services next year. “The additional mental health support introduced this year including the after-hours crisis support and counselling staff will continue into 2021 and we will review our other services to best support our students.�

Farrago will continue to monitor updates from the University and Victorian Government and provide further details when they become available.

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ICYMI:

NEWS

COVID-19 Subject Scores to Still Appear on Student Transcripts Ailish Hallinan and Lauren Berry

Students studying during the COVID-19 pandemic have been drawn into a false sense of security by the

University’s revised Weighted Average Mark (WAM) calculation system.

Introduced earlier this year, the system acknowledges that students may be academically disadvantaged during the pandemic, but still makes them bear individual subject scores on their transcript.

The current WAM amnesty arrangement for University of Melbourne students—which ensures that students won’t suffer from a lowered WAM mark due to the stresses of the COVID-19 pandemic this year—fails to consider the possible repercussions of featuring these subject scores on the student’s academic transcript. This makes all the difference for students when applying for jobs and positions in the long term.

Normally, having a higher WAM score is favourable for students when applying for jobs, internships, and other graduate programs. However, the University’s policy risks putting students at a competitive disadvantage, with the inclusion of COVID-19 subject scores alongside the WAM recorded on their transcript. The presence of low scores (or even failed subjects) on an academic record could lead employers to think that a student’s WAM is a non-accurate indicator of their academic performance.

The University’s solution to explaining COVID-19 grades and the revised WAM calculation is to flag non-included transcript scores with a “^” sign. This is followed by an additional comment outlining a recognition of the pandemic’s impact on academic scores.

According to the University’s website, prospective employers and accreditation organisations are encouraged to visit the website to gain a better understanding of the “^” system.

An issue with this approach is that it assumes employers will actively take the time to understand this University’s WAM policy and be sympathetic about undesirable raw scores. It ignores the possibility that third parties might instead dismiss an individual’s eligibility based on such scores, and favour more appealing applications from other competitors.

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The University’s WAM amnesty arrangement differs from the academic amnesties being granted to students at other Victorian universities, creating an unlevel playing field when applying for jobs, graduate programs and internship opportunities. Monash University allows students to choose between showcasing their scores or opting for a Satisfied Faculty Requirements (SFR) grade, however Melbourne University offers no such academic relief. Moreover, La Trobe University has ensured that fail marks will not affect a student’s prospects—these transcripts will state that no result had been recorded due to “extenuating circumstances”.

The University did not respond to Farrago’s questions about why it had elected for this WAM amnesty arrangement as opposed to the ones offered by other universities, nor did it address criticisms about how such arrangements could impact students. Instead, a spokesperson told Farrago: “The University of Melbourne’s treatment of the WAM to reflect the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 has been designed not to disadvantage any student. All marks appear on the student’s transcript— those included and excluded in the WAM—as a complete record of the student’s studies at the University of Melbourne. The transcript includes an explanatory comment to clarify these grades and the revised WAM calculation method in 2020 to prospective employers, accreditation bodies or other third parties, who recognised the value of a University of Melbourne degree.”

“

...has been designed not to disadvantage any student.

“

As the end of the semester draws to a close, the impact of the University’s WAM arrangement will soon be seen.

Farrago will continue to follow this story.

Illustrated by Kitman Yeung

13

14

Illustrated by Reann Lin

NEWS

Spoon Villages and Community Gardens

By Jasper MacCuspie

D

uring the stress of the COVID-19 pandemic, many communities around Victoria have turned to community garden installations as mechanisms to promote cohesion and unity, in the face of adversity.

The popular ‘spoon villages’ have seen swathes of wooden spoons, and other similar kitchen implements being fixed in the ground together. These are often decorated with googly eyes, pipe-cleaner arms, and colourful adornments. Particularly for the younger children of the community, stuck at home, with none of the socialisation that school provides, this has been a valuable creative outlet, and decoration for those going for walks.

However, the spoon villages have not been free from disaster. One particularly large village in the southeastern suburb of Edithvale was destroyed by parties unknown, prompting the intervention of the State Emergency Service (SES), who repaired the damaged fixture, replete with SES decorated spoons.

Community gardens have also served as important lifelines for the community, both as an outlet for those who desire the satisfaction of working on a community project, and as a source of food for those struggling financially. The secretary of the St Kilda Community Gardens Club elaborated:

“We have kept the Gardens open for members to harvest their vegetables during the COVID-19 restrictions, but with strict rules for entering the gardens”, they said.

“The Gardens have been important in providing a cheap and safe source of basic food for the family table. We are also planning to make surplus produce available to the local community.”

There are 37 Council-subsidised community gardens in the Ward of Port Phillip. Such measures assist with coping with the stresses of the pandemic.

“Speaking personally, access to the Community Gardens, simply as a safe and peaceful place to visit whilst harvesting food for the kitchen, has helped me cope with the COVID-19 lockdown”, the secretary stated.

Those interested in being involved in a community garden will be pleased to know that the University of Melbourne Student Union Environment Office, in collaboration with two staff conveners, operate one.

However, due to the lockdown restrictions, there has been minimal access since March. This should revert back to normal at the start of next year.

Those interested in the St Kilda Community Gardens club should visit their Facebook page.

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NEWS

Secret Spaces:

The University of Melbourne Food Co-op

Pavani Athukorala

U nion House is arguably the beating heart of campus. And while many of its spaces are well-known, there is one quiet spot nestled by the first-floor elevators that is home to an unexpected and impressive history. ‘The Food Co-op,’ a sign reads. ‘Since 1976. Under no management.’

A co-operative is defined as a ‘democratic organization controlled by its members for a common purpose’. The UniMelb Food Co-op(erative) was established in July 1976 by a student committee as a volunteer-run non-profit,* committed to selling healthy, minimally packaged foods and bulk goods at affordable prices. It soon became a thriving and profitable staple of campus life.

The co-op is a quirky, homey place that feels like the piece of history it is. The decor is eclectic, to say the least. The walls are half mint-green and half lemon-yellow, with one featuring a mural of a robot?...house? orbited by several dozen teapots. Another is papered with posters of various campaigns it has been linked to over the years. Yellowing and dog-eared, they stand as testament to the political and environmental activism that has been central to the co-op since its inception. An assortment of chalkboards announce such tidbits as the day’s menu, or that we have piping-hot pies. (This, reader, is a lie. We had pies—bestselling, beloved pies—until our supplier moved abruptly to Queensland. None of us are tall enough to clean the blackboard, so we must explain this daily to disappointed pie-seekers.)

Though the hot plates on offer varied depending on the produce sourced from that week’s Farmers’ Market, the co-op chai—hot in the winter, iced in summer—always flowed freely. We also sold spices, tea, snacks (think gleaming pink Turkish delight, chocolate-covered hazelnuts and soy crisps) and a selection of bulk goods, including (to our delight during the first days of pandemic panic) toilet paper.

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Tucked behind the dining and food prep areas is the back office. Tiny and impossibly cluttered, it comes equipped with a battered PC plodding along on Windows 2005. Back when campus was open, I would pretend to study there, while reading past records filed away in dusty binders. I liked knowing that someone had baked flapjacks there in May 2007 or ordered 5kg of cinnamon in June 2004. I found the sense of continuity that came from knowing people had cooked in and cared about this place long before I’d ever heard of it, and that they would do so long after I left, both bittersweet and comforting.

The co-op operates non-hierarchically: any volunteer, regardless of experience, can participate in the weekly collectives where decisions about its upkeep are made. Volunteers cook and clean, order produce, and manage repairs. You volunteer as little or much as you like — some students drop in between classes, others (i.e. me) linger there obsessively. Personally, this is what first drew me in. There is work to be done here, I remember thinking, and I can help do it.

For there is work to be done. Despite the hard work of a core group of vollies, the co-op only made a few sales per day before lockdown and was unable to open more than three times a week. It had also faded into obscurity. Though students agreed that the Union House provided overpriced and underwhelming fare, few were aware that an affordable alternative existed just above it.

I only volunteered at the co-op for a semester before the pandemic shut us down. I miss everything about it, from the people, to the spice grinder that only works if you stick a pen in it, to the mug that meows when flipped upside-down. And with many regular vollies in their final semesters, I wonder about the co-op’s future.

Illustrated by Arielle Vlahitois

So, reader, if you find yourself on campus in 2021 (fingers crossed!), regardless of whether you’re a dazed first-year or weeks from graduating: drop by. Buy a hotplate, chop a zucchini. Remind yourself that students have been boiling chickpeas and listening to Fleetwood Mac in this space for nearly half a century.

Building community and finding purpose on campus are integral to student well-being; it would be heartbreaking if the co-op, which has done exactly that for so long, were to fade away now when most desperately needed.

For updates about the co-op’s reopening, like and follow our Facebook page, or join our volunteer group!

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SUMMER BREAK MONDAY

Monday is for MOVIES. Our recomendation for today is ‘Black Panther’

MONDAY

Today we are feeling like the ‘Legend of Bagger Vance’

MONDAY

You can’t watch past Narnia: ‘The Lion, the witch and the Wardrobe’

MONDAY

Let is not forget the summar classics, give ‘Baywatch’ a watch

MONDAY

Speaking of the bay, we suggest the ‘Whale Rider’

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TUESDAY

Tuesday is for TASTE, some food ideas. Tonight, we’re eating Pasta

TUESDAY

Pasta again tonight, but this time it’s sweet potatoe and quinoa linguini

TUESDAY

We are going for a roast. Roast potatoes, zuchini, mushrooms, the works

TUESDAY

Eat out tonight, cooking is cool but so is supporting local restaurants

TUESDAY

Tonight we are rolling with rice paper rolls

WEDNESDAY

Wednesday is for WONDER, it’s time for an adventure.

A garden will do.

WEDNESDAY

Wonder what’s happening to your heart? Go for a climb or hike and find out.

WEDNESDAY

You can’t wonder about animals anymore, it’s time for a trip to the zoo.

WEDNESDAY

BEACH TIME ADVENTURE! Top beaches include Rosebud, Ocean Grove and Wilsom

WEDNESDAY

Wonder what you’re doing tomorrow? Book something in!

THURSDAY

Thursday is for THINKING, get that pen and paper ready!

THURSDAY

Today’ is about ART! Sketch, doodle or dine and draw what you’re eating!

THURSDAY

People love poetry, it’s the pure form of expression.

THURSDAY

Journalling can clear you mind and clarify your thoughts.

Give it a go!

THURSDAY

This is a free Thursday! Create with a pen and paper what you choose!

Illustrated by Torsten Strokirch

FRIDAY

Friday is for FAMILY, and if that is in short supply, you always have us.

FRIDAY

Tell someone you love and appreciate them.

FRIDAY

Do a kind gesture, make a cup of something, offer a hand, give them a hug.

FRIDAY

It’s talking time.

Give someone you haven’t seen in a while a call.

FRIDAY

Family Friday, just in time for Christmas.

Tell them you love them!

Art by Elmira Cheung

X

President | Hannah Buchan

OB REPORTS

Congratulations to everyone for making it through this year! This year has had its ups and downs (and let’s be real, mostly downs) but it has truly been an honour to be your President this year. I have learned so much and really valued being able to lead campaigns for student rights. Student unionism is such a strong thing, and this year has shown that we can make real change when we stand up for our rights. Everyone has earned a well-deserved break, so go off and enjoy the sunshine and UMSU will be waiting for you in 2021.

General Secretary | Jack Buksh ***Report Not Submitted***

Clubs and Societies | Jordan Di Natale

I cannot believe the year is over! I’ve done so much during my term as Clubs and Societies Office Bearer! I have organised the biggest ever SummerFest of all time! I’ve facilitated with the first ever commencement ceremonies!

I have conducted the first ever online WinterFest! I’ve created so many policies, club resources plus training for online AGMs (200+ AGMs in one semester, WOW!)! I have made UMSU history in being the first ever sole C&S OB and I have done such an amazing job! But what is the most satisfying and my biggest accomplishments, is being an OB during a pandemic!

Creative Arts | Emily White and Olivia Bell

This year has been truly arty and truly farty. We made art at home, danced our stress away, tasted new work, gave out butt loads of grants, and learned to transform our busy mess into Business. And those are just the highlights! For every person who joined us on Zoom, sometimes in a silly costume, we’d like to thank you for connecting with us this year. We also want to give a massive welcome to Vaishnavi and Merryn, who will be taking over the reins as your Creative Arts Office Bearers next year.

Chookas you two!

Education Academic | Joshua Munro and Georgia Walton Briggs

It’s exam season and as usual we’ve been buckling down on studying how the University has been operating them.

We’ve also launched our Counter Course Handbook where you can submit reviews of your subjects. Applications have also closed for the Student Representative Network, and we soon will be pleased to announce the wonderful group to represent students in the University. As always, if you have issues or concerns with Education feel free to contact us or UMSU Advocacy. 2020 has been an extremely challenging year for us all, so thank you to all the students who have reached out to us over this year and have made our job rewarding.

Education Public | Charlie Joyce and Noni Bridger

We’re wrapping up one of the weirdest and most fantastic years in our office! We are so proud of all the work we’ve done fighting for students and staff through one of the toughest years for Unimelb. Thank you to all our collective members, campaigners, and staunch activists who have been involved in our department this year. Welcome to the new office bearers who are coming into this role next year, you’ll do a wonderful job and build on everything from this year. Signing off for the last time, in solidarity, Noni and Charlie.

Burnley | Kaitlyn Hammond

While 2020 has proven that time isn’t real, the calendar shows that an entire year has gone by! It’s great to look back and see that even in this year’s chaos, we’ve had some really great things come out of it. Our upskilling workshops were a definite highlight, showing off the skills of our passionate students. Our trivia nights and Zoom socials brought our campus together. We fought with UMSU for justice for students during challenging times. We are excited to see what next year has in store and would love to hear what you’re hoping to see more of in 2021!

Instagram: @UMSUburnley Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/burnleystudentassociation

Disabilities | Hue Man Dang and Srishti Chatterjee

This has been a big year – for everyone. A public health crisis and unprecedent isolation is rough, alongside managing degrees, jobs and personal relationships, but we made it – and we’re proud of everyone! It has been a challenge and also a true honour to be the Disabilities Officers this year. We’ve held collectives, trivia nights, tv marathons and workshops to keep y’all (and ourselves) engaged with each other in the year, when collectives and friendships have been so vital. With the federal government’s attacks on higher education, students with disabilities have it harder than ever. We cannot wait for our successors to come next year, and focus on stronger relationships with students, and fight and heal together!

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Indigenous | Hope Kuchel & Shanysa McConville

People of Colour | Gurpreet Singh & Nicole Nabbout ***Report Not Submitted***

Activities | India Pinkney and Hayley Stanford

Wow, what a year it has been! We held our first ever Union House Twilight Festival and our annual Start of Uni Party way back in February, which were both huge successes. We have had more bands than ever, with multiple weeks including two bands. We have held online trivia, games, movies, comedy and talent competitions, an online escape room and even an online Oktoberfest. We would like to thank everyone who has come along to our events, it is your support and kindness which has made this year so enjoyable! We wish the best of luck to the new Activities OBs for 2021, Christos and Phoebe!

Queer | Ciara O’Sullivan and A’bidah Zaid Shirbeeni ***Report Not Submitted***

Southbank | Verity Crane and Hayden Williams ***Report Not Submitted***

Welfare | Natasha Guglielmino ***Report Not Submitted***

Women | Aria Sunga and Naomi Smith

This year has been a busy year for the Women s Department. Throughout the year, we continued to run our four collectives.

CW: Sexual Assault and Harassment We were also able to continue to run the Safety on Campus Campaign, where we have pushed for the development of a therapeutic centre to support survivors at the University, and we established the UMSU Sexual Assault and Harassment Working Group. We want to say a big thank you to all those people who supported us; we could not have done it without you.

Environment | Olivia Sullivan and Sophie Kerrigan

Wow what a whacky year it has been. Stepping into 2020 we were so excited to see what it would hold and had big plans to make this an incredible year in enviro. Unfortunately miss Rona hit and all our original plans went up in smoke, but we sure think we’ve made the absolute most of UMSU online. We’ve run more than 60 events, learnt how to do online activism, built connections with external organisations, worked with the university to introduce sustainability education into the curriculum of all undergraduate degrees, made sure student voices will be at the centre of the universities new sustainability plan and worked with the clubs and societies department to introduce and implement a clubs sustainability policy.

21

OB REPORTS

After an eventful and chaotic year, we are honoured to have been able to help our constituents to the best of our ability in these unprecedented times. Making the transitions to virtual events was certainly tricky at first, but we were ecstatic people came along and had a good time with us throughout the year, especially at our National Science Week presentation and Yarn & Weave session. We are also excited to announce we’ll be returning as Indigenous OB’s in 2021, so get ready for more events, campaigns, Under Bunjil, and good times in the year to come!

SATIRE NEWS

Content Warning: racism, white supremacy

Suburban Mum Distressed That Neo-Nazi Slightly Mishandled Dog Pavani Athukorala

A video featuring an area man named Dick Wiener (54) yelling racist epithets has recently gained promi-

nence on social media. Wiener, whose arms and legs are heavily tattooed with neo-Nazi symbols, is seen enthusiastically making white power gestures at the camera with one hand while pulling a tiny Shih Tzu somewhat tightly by its leash with the other.

Jolene Karen Maribelle, a stay-at-home mother and budding entrepreneur who runs a booming side hustle selling healing-crystal-infused essential oils on Etsy, confessed that the video had “shaken [her] to the core.”

“The way he was treating that little dog, y’all,” she said, trembling with righteous indignation, in a Zoom interview with Farrago. “We’re a lovely, welcoming community in these parts. We draw the line at such behaviour.”

Ms Maribelle has boldly taken the initiative to start an online petition condemning Mr Wiener for his “totally despicable” (sic) treatment of the Shih Tzu, which has gained over 10,000 signatures in 24 hours.

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“I’m thrilled to see the town coming together like this,” she gushed, beaming.

A rival petition (currently at 30 signatures) calling to arrest Mr Wiener for harassment and ban the neo-Nazi organisation he is part of has also been circling social media. Ms Maribelle demanded that it be taken down immediately.

“Oh, I’m sure that was a big misunderstanding,” she commented, fluttering an airy hand. “Besides, we should focus on the real problems at hand.”

The PTA Ms Maribelle is president of has fully endorsed her efforts. A statement released by them read: “In a situation where others would spew divisive rhetoric, we admire our colleague’s attempt to unify all parties behind animal welfare, which is the overriding bipartisan issue here.” **Racists are up for mockery; racism is not. Reader, I encourage you to actively pursue anti-racist education, and donate to racial justice causes whenever possible.

Illustrated by Arielle Vlahiotis

SATIRE

Local Woman Terrified By Small Spark Of Optimism Within Self

Charlotte Armstrong

A local woman was horrified to find herself cradling the smallest hopeful spark following this dumpster

fire of a year. In the wake of what has felt like a decade’s worth of tragedies and misfortunes crammed into one year, the idea of optimism felt so foreign to the former glass-half-full-er that its presence startled her to tears.

Somewhere between terrifying fires, a pandemic, the brutal reminders of systemic racism, the impending demise of civilisation due to climate change, and even murder hornets (whose disappearance is far more unsettling than their discovery), there has been a sharp, profound decline in the raw amount of ‘hope’ circulating in the collective consciousness.

As this decade-in-a-year has systematically ground down on humanity’s consciousness, many people find it difficult to remember when the world wasn’t an apocalyptic crumbling nightmare. One child, when asked about the last time they felt any sense of positivity towards the future, responded by taking a long grizzled sip of their drink and saying, “Haven’t heard that word in a long while—we don’t use it round here.” The interview was cut short by the interviewee’s caregiver reminding them to socially distance

However, the presence of small budding hopes—like the sight of the first flower after a ceaseless winter— demonstrates more than just the human spirit. More than just a desire for a mellow return to the status quo, these hopes represent humanity’s realisation of how much change is possible in our lives. We have realised how much we value one another, and how much we must continue to believe and champion one another in the face of the systems that seek to destroy us piece by piece. Now that we have found ourselves untethered from social mores, these sparks represent, if nothing else, that humanity can and will find a way to create a world for the better, simply because there is no other option.

Update: This reporter would like to add that she, too, has found a small spark of hope.

Illustrated by Phuong Ngo

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SATIRE

University Executives To Start Wearing Ear Masks To Protect Themselves From Listening To Students Lauren Berry

A

university spokesperson announced on Monday that wearing ear masks will be mandatory for all members of the University executive committee in order to slow the spread of student complaints reaching their ears.

From Wednesday, all principal management committee members and additional spokespeople will be required to cover their ears when around students for any of the four permitted reasons: checking emails, conducting Zoom tutorials and conferences, visiting coffee shops, and exercising around Parkville.

According to a university newsletter, the 2020 outbreak of student complaints is the single biggest threat facing University executives. Where this phenomenon used to only involve a limited circle of the student population, and affect the emails of a few unlucky staff members, the rise in case numbers is threatening the integrity and public image of university powers. At least one-half of the committee is believed to be seriously infected at this stage—experiencing symptoms such as awkwardness, lowered self-esteem, and feelings of guilt and shame at the suggestion they are not doing their jobs properly.

“It’s time to take drastic action,” the spokesperson told reporters. “It used to just be UMSU and student journalists bugging us about ignoring the welfare of students this, or financially-exploiting international students that…blah blah blah. One delayed half-assed email later, the matter’s dealt with. Wash your hands afterwards, you’ll be fine. But now even the tamest first-years seem to be trash talking us on social media.”

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“If we’re to protect ourselves and our high pay checks, drowning out the noise entirely is the best solution” they added.

Farrago understands that many executive committee members have already been practising social distancing from student complaints for the past year or longer. The mandatory ear mask rule is only expected to last until student complacency levels are sufficiently under control again, but executives have been encouraged to continue practising safety measures—such as ignoring students, taking no interest in student issues, and other methods of protection— beyond the outbreak.

Farrago and other news sources tried to contact The University for more details about what this would mean for students, tutors and casual staff struggling and needing support during 2020—but received no formal response. However, according to a statement posted late Tuesday night from the University of Melbourne Twitter account, the university announced they would not be taking any more questions at this time.

“We can’t hear you and don’t want to risk doing so,” it said.

Illustrated by Phoebe Owl

NONFICTION

The 5 Stages of failing a Driving Test Rayanne Margi

You thought this day was going to mark the beginning of your journey into self-sufficiency. Whether you memorised every road rule or forged your entire logbook, no amount of driving lessons could have prepared you for the emotional rollercoaster that is failing a driving test.

1. Denial: You’ll aggressively flip through the VicRoads handbook to convince anyone who’ll listen that you did, in fact, have the right of way. You’ll blame the weather conditions, the roadworks and the incompetence of other drivers, refusing to believe that someone with your unparalleled driving ability could make a mistake.

2. Anger: You’ll direct your rage at the Victorian government with a critical analysis of the VicRoads system.

How could they possibly have the nerve to fail you after forcing you to log 120 hours of supervised driving?

A few personal attacks on the assessor will also likely come into play. As far as you’re concerned, they’re depressed, going through a divorce, and projecting the misery of their unfulfilling existence onto you.

3. Bargaining: You’ll wonder whether slipping the VicRoads worker a 20 will change the fact that they’re “booked out for the next two months”. Who has tomorrow’s earliest appointment? If something were to happen to them, would the time slot be freed up? Asking out of curiosity, of course.

4. Depression: Assuming you haven’t been jailed for the previous stage, your misery will peak as you anticipate another two months of self-consciously whipping out your learner’s permit when prompted for ID. You’ll regret broadcasting your test date to everyone you know, bracing yourself for their incoming ridicule.

5. Acceptance: Finally, you’ll come to terms with the fact that you must have failed for a reason. Fate works in mysterious ways: perhaps you would’ve reversed confidently out of the VicRoads car park and straight into a family of pedestrians. All that’s left to do now is to press the L-Plates back onto the windscreen of your parents’ SUV and get over it.

Illustrated by Rose Gertsakis

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NONFICTION

2 Audiobook Reviews, In Which There Are 4 Recommendations, The Whole Thing Is Split Into Quarters And Bro I Am Just Vibing.

Nat Hollis

Part 1. Vibing (feat. 4 recommendations and too much David Foster Wallace talk): Who says that not doing readings for class is a bad thing? It’s an action (or inaction I guess) that’s given me my main coping mechanism for the year’s turmoil, so I’m inclined to think that maybe skipping readings is, in fact, a healthy choice1.

It starts with ignoring David Foster Wallace2. We had to read one of his tennis essays for a creative nonfiction unit last semester. Actually, ‘had to read it’ is a strong turn of phrase; it was on the reader and we were told to read it. I did not. I couldn’t even tell you which one of his tennis essays it was, but to be honest who cares, it’s all tennis. All I took away from that class was his name.

Three weeks later I’m in Brunswick Bound with a hankering to satisfy my near-fetishistic book buying habit and there he is again. Twice actually. He’s there once as Infinite Jest3 and once as Consider the Lobster, a series of essays that I added to my Goodreads TBR but left without buying4.

Then lockdown, and no more browsing bookstores for a while5. I need a new book, and I need something to listen to while roller skating6, so I decide to get into audiobooks7.

Open Goodreads, see Lobster, its sample isn’t bad, why not? I buy it8.

Lobster led me to more nonfiction; Haruki Murakami’s What I Talk About When I Talk About Running9 came next. I push myself harder and faster because that’s what Murakami does. I get a bruise under my toenail10 and become fitter than I ever have been. The book lasts me five days, five one-hour-long skates, long enough to foster a habit I’ll stick to for another five months, one that will eventuate in me unpreparedly racing down a hill so fast that the bearings come within a single twist of flying off and taking the wheels and my life with them.

Books, even audiobooks, have real-world consequences, apparently.

Murakami leads me to a non-audiobook, Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Kawakami11, which makes me feel cold and scared, but in a good way. So I end up revisiting a haunt of mine from mid-last year, flicking through my copy of Nausea as I find comfort in Sartrean existentialism, because I used to be a philosophy major before I cut that shit out.

All this is to say I listened to Sarah Bakewell’s At the Existentialist Cafe12. I was still skating regularly at the time I listened to it, which makes for an odd experience. I was losing myself while skating and listening, which is normal, but now I was the one being talked about. Theory has a universality to it so that, even if it is wrong, it is at least an abstraction and theorisation of your internal life, and now that was being played over the weightlessness of skating. This was all vaguely alarming, because in this situation apparently you start to become like the ideas, your puny mortal body starts taking on a sense of abstraction. Which is to say I didn’t really get any solace from it, though that’s probably not the book’s fault.

Regardless, all that is to contextualise two reviews of audiobooks that released in spring.

Part 2. The Sandman and What Dreams Cost: The Sandman is a graphic novel from the 80s which I finished reading two days before buying the audiobook, so just infer what you want about the quality of the story.

I like radio plays, which is good because that’s what The Sandman has become in its transition to audio. I like radio plays despite my only real exposure to them being back in middle school when we made them for English, though ours didn’t have realistically painful screams of abject horror. That and production value are probably the main differences, oh and talent… and narrative cohesion.

I didn’t find the comic particularly scary, even though large swathes of the first few issues are ostensibly horror (at least aesthetically), I was much too focused on the dreams, how airy they all felt, to really notice any horror anyway.

This is where the major change from comic to audio comes.

Dream swaps for fear.

Screams on a page are still just words on a page. They are not the voice of a real woman coming through your phone wailing about the death of her family as you scrub last night’s dishes while wearing the cartoon owl pyjamas that your grandma bought you last year, your hands too sudsy to touch your phone and pause the screaming so you’re forced to bear it out. They are just words on a page, words on a page are skimmable, words on a page do not echo ever so slightly off the white tile backsplash.

And you know what? I liked it.

I don’t like scary movies and I don’t like gore, or violence in movies or any entertainment really, but I liked it here. I think the difference was that here fear comes from the empathetic, it is fear not from a man with a knife and a hockey mask, but fear of mundanities, of existence personified.

That feels important. The unification of trauma and universality is, if nothing else, a reminder. If you’ll permit me to digress into the issues of this year for a sentence, The Sandman becomes a direct address to the idea that this year’s pain is insular. It reminds us of the universality of the human responses.

We have this way of romanticising dreams as some form of purist escapism that is almost wholly good. But there is a price. We are entirely obsessed with ourselves in our dreams and that dampens empathy. Audible’s The Sandman is the cure for this, to an extent, although it is starkly confronting in that it is forcible empathy when you might not want it.

Confrontation is fine. Good actually, a lot of the time.

But the line where the wrenching shock of radical empathy becomes too much is unclear. When I have to roll to a stop and cry on the grass of the cemetery lawn because I’m flush with emotions I don’t quite understand or maybe aren’t quite my own, is that too much?

I don’t think so.

1 Note: the author is not a doctor, they are an Arts major who can’t jog a mile, so any commentary on what is “healthy” is purely speculative.

2 This is apparently a vogue thing to do in the literary community at the moment, I was not aware of that at the time, I was just lazy.

3 Which comes in at 1000 pages, and that is, academically speaking, too fucking much.

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Part 3. The Sweetdark Cold: In her novel Inferno, Eileen Miles says that in another life she could see herself being the kind of person who takes drugs, dances and gets up on stage at nightclub drag shows. I get what she means but I can’t relate. Like, I truly believe that on some spiritual, molecular level I’m a rank and file curmudgeon. I can honestly see myself being reincarnated as the minister from Footloose before I can see myself coming back as someone who goes anywhere near the stage in a nightclub.

But that’s okay. There is variability in all this. Even if that variability makes me a boring bastard.

That’s what Sav Brown’s Sweetdark reminds me. That it’s okay.

It’s the reminder I didn’t quite get a couple of months ago from Existentialist Cafe. That weird warm blanket of existential dread. That strange comfort in knowing it doesn’t matter and things will be okay because of it.

I love Sav Brown. She’s a YouTube poet and I find myself ever drawn back to her videos (and now her book). She never labours a point, her poetics are unique but familiar, and I miss her voice (both literal and poetic) when it is gone.

It’s fitting that a poetry collection about loneliness makes you miss it.

It’s fitting that a poetry collection about loneliness comes out this year.

It’s fitting that the whole time I was listening to the collection I was thinking about that scene at the end of Blue is the Warmest Colour where Adele is caught cheating by her girlfriend Emma, and as she’s being screamed at Adele goes in for a kiss. I’m not really sure why I kept thinking about it.

I think it’s probably something about rejection and desperation. There’s this whole big undercurrent in Sweetdark that even though the reclined existential comfort is there, it’s hiding a reluctance to accept what it’s presenting as the truth, and maybe that manifests as desperation. Which sort of gets me thinking about desperation as a human emotion, like how did it even come about? In Darwinian terms, I mean. When in nature does the prioritisation of emotion over logic help? I’m sure there’s an answer to that, but I don’t really want to know, to be honest. I’d prefer to think of it as just some accident of the universe; the ambivalent mass Brown describes in Sweetdark, always inadvertently spitting out beauty in ways you wouldn’t expect.

I can’t skate when I listen to Sweetdark; I couldn’t find the WD-40 in Coles to fix the aching wheels. Maybe all the walking made me think about desperation as a beautiful thing, walking I get so desperate to go faster, to get where I want to be and no longer have to move my little legs that I see the prioritisation of feeling over fact as some human triumph.

Part 4. Rank and File Curmudgeon Tells You What’s What: I didn’t mean to make this, like, depressing or anything, I read other stuff in the last few months that I probably could’ve written about (I didn’t think you’d want to hear my in-depth opinion on The Elements of Style (Illustrated)).

The point of all this was not to wallow in existential dread, I wanted to try and get across some sense of peace I’ve gotten in the last few weeks.

People have been reading more and more through 2020 (if you’re a deeply interesting person like I am and you read Publisher’s Weekly, you’ll know print sales have actually been going pretty steadily up in 2020) and that’s a good thing.

When this piece gets published it will hopefully be after Melbourne’s most intensive lockdown has finished, and some semblance of real-world social interaction has begun again. People will have changed. Intuitively I keep thinking they will have changed for the worse but that’s not necessarily true.

I’ve found myself in moments of not just brutal isolation, but brutal empathy. I’ve found myself in moments of not just dreadful longing, but beautiful desperation, and I think despite how it feels some of it has changed me for the better.

That is to say, I suppose, go back out with optimism that people have become better, even if it goes against what the anxieties yell. That’s what I’ll be doing.

4 The English major version of blue balling.

5 And just like that every English major went abstinent… actually my friends in WA were able to go to bookstores… wait, was I getting cucked????

6 Shut up.

7 Tertiary education is paying off with problem solving skills like these.

8 Recommendation #1, Consider the Lobster, good to roller-skate to.

9 Recommendation #2, it’s better than #1.

10 Subungual Hematoma, also called runner’s toe.

11 Recommendation #3, better than #1 and #2 put together.

12 #4, makes thorough and attention intensive nonfiction work in audio.

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NONFICTION

Content Warning: sexism, racism, transphobia

The Dangers Of White Feminism Gabbi Lobo

In high school, I had a class with a girl who was an

avid feminist. She was one of the most liberal, outspoken girls I’d ever met and I admired her passion for equality. However, as time went on, I noticed some repetitive problematic behaviours. She would protest the gender pay gap but accuse women of colour for being ‘rewarded’ with more opportunities in the name of ‘diversity’. She’d make fun of East Asian girls for having slanted eyes, then turn around and preach that all bodies were beautiful, in the same breath. As a young “feminist-in-training”, I was conflicted. After all, were we not fighting for the same cause?

Feminism has existed for a long time. In the Western world, the first-wave feminist movement started in the 1850s and mainly focused on women’s legal rights, including the right to vote. Whilst great strides have since been made towards the ultimate achievement of equality, thanks to women who paved the way (Sylvia Plath, Jane Austen, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Angela Davis, Frida Kahlo, Marsha P. Johnson, the list goes on), one has to question why it seems as though we are still fighting the same battles, generations later. Who has benefited from the achievements of the greats before us, and who has been left behind?

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“White feminism” refers to feminist efforts that uplift white women, whilst excluding or failing to address issues surrounding minority groups such as women of colour, LGBTQ+ women (including trans women), disabled women, refugee women, sex workers, etc.

In her article ‘When Feminism is White Supremacy in Heels’, feminist writer Rachel Elizabeth Cargle outlines three main ways in which white feminism manifests itself in everyday life: centring, tone policing and the white saviour complex. J.K. Rowling’s TERF (trans-exclusionary radical feminist) tweets are an example of centring, the most popular of all.

Following criticism for her transphobic views, Rowling redirected the conversation towards herself and the plight of cis women, partaking in tone policing by victimising herself and accusing others of sexism when their beliefs did not align with her transphobic ones. Lana Del Rey’s infamous Instagram post about “needing a place in feminism for women like [her]” whilst simultaneously putting down other female POC artists, is another example. Bella Thorne’s behaviour on the adult-content platform OnlyFans had a direct negative impact on the lives of sex workers who used it to earn a living. When confronted about the issue, Thorne stated that she wanted to “destigmatise sex work”. In reality, her actions benefited no one but herself—a blueprint example of the white saviour complex. While she reaped the benefits of being a wealthy white woman, sex workers suffered the consequences of her actions.

White feminism is not real feminism. While acting under the guise of feminism, its goal is to gain patriarchal power, which by nature operates upon the oppression of others. It simply cannot be a coincidence that feminism has existed for so long, but the experiences of women of colour, LGBTQ+ women etc. have largely remained unchanged. White feminists in positions of power or influence desperately need to check themselves and consider whether their actions are truly beneficial for all women, or simply themselves as a woman.

Coined by black feminist author Kimberlé Williams Crenshaw in 1989, the term intersectionality explores the multifaceted connection between race, gender and other systems that work together to oppress while allowing privilege. As author Gloria Jean Watkins articulated, the emergence of intersectionality “challenged the notion that ‘gender’ was the primary factor determining a woman’s fate”. Intersectional feminism aims to include all women, no matter their race, religion, or sexual preference. Unfortunately, many mainstream feminist movements lack intersectionality. There is, for instance, a dangerous correlation made between sexual liberation and equality in Western feminism. Yes, it is important to allow women to express themselves physically however they like, free of judgement, shame, and scrutiny. But the movement does not stop at wearing short skirts, and those who think it does are the same people who think that women who wear burqas or hijabs are oppressed. Similarly, as a South Asian, first-generation immigrant, I’ve noticed a lack of understanding of different cultures and religions within the Western feminist movement. When I explain that my familial values trump my desire to go through a “hoe phase”, many white feminists assume that I am not a “true” feminist, and that I am not interested in equality. You can adhere to your cultures’ values and expectations, while also criticising them, and pursuing change.

Women are not liberated unless all women are liberated. That is the duty and responsibility of those living in multicultural societies such as Australia. We can no longer look to performative activists who partake in close-minded, selfish behaviours that they claim are for the sake of feminism, especially when their actions have a direct negative effect on minority groups.

Equality is not simply between white men and white women, just as the society we live in does not just consist of white men and white women. Feminism is not feminism, unless it is intersectional.

Illustrated by Sidonie Bird De La Coeur

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Illustrated by Steph Markernick

NONFICTION

Under Water Mark Yin

403.64 ppm According to the Fourth National Climate Assessment (NCA) of the United States, it is likely that sea levels will have risen by between 50 and 130 cm by 2100 compared to the year 2000.

However, large uncertainties remain with respect to the iceberg discharge off Antarctica. A study published in March 2016 at 404.83 ppm emphasises how large those uncertainties are. Antarctica alone could contribute as much as 1 m to sea levels by the end of the century, suggesting we might see a total 2 m sea level rise by 2100.

Past 2100, sea levels will continue to rise, and could increase by 1 to 3 m depending on global greenhouse gas emission levels in the future.

548.42 ppm We knew it was coming, but it was still a shock when Docklands collapsed. Buildings were abandoned, thousands swarmed up north. You could say we’ve adapted, active voice, and few would probably correct you.

I put the kettle on and the water comes to a boil, little by little. If you gently place a frog in tepid water and turn the heat on low…

494.76 ppm A non-geometric dome defies traditional means of measurement, but more importantly, it creates elevation.

In this modelling project, plaster membranes were hung, allowed to ossify, then flipped to form a dome.

Various hanging conditions might affect the configuration of the dome, including the shape and size of the membrane, the consistency of the paste, and the stitch of the gauze. Membrane shape and size were adjusted to form four different frames—a square and a trapezoid, both large and small.

When analysing the morphological behaviour of these domes, the distinctions are clear. Small membranes create tight, intimate domes, while larger membranes tower; square membranes are rigid and static, while trapezoid membranes undulate, as if an ocean tide.

The models suggest that elevated, non-geometric structures are versatile in both aesthetic and functionality. As our past closes in on us at an alarming, unstoppable rate, these domes will play a vital role in creating shelter and housing for people across the globe. They will enable humanity’s reclamation of the planet, and of itself.

548.42 ppm It rained yesterday, but even when the floodplains clear we stay inside. I shut the windows, put the foil back up, and roll down the blinds for good measure.

It’s October, and we all know what’s around the corner in October.

I take the kettle off and begin to brew coffee— once a twice-daily habit for my ba and dad, I remember, but now a black-market commodity. I’ve sat on this spoonful for many a month now. Today I turn 68.

524.54 ppm Calling all passengers! The Airbus Century Falcon will soon be available for commercial flying—around the world in just 8 hours!

The Falcon combines world-class sustainability with out-of-this-world comfort. It’s never been easier to cross oceans, visit loved ones or even relocate entirely. Lay back in our air-conditioned reclining pods and sip on a refreshing iced coffee—you’ll be there in no time!

Tickets start at $40,000. The world is your home!

548.42 ppm Ba came here with his 老爸 and 妈 way back at 374.14 ppm, way before we passed the threshold.

Sometimes I imagine going back in time, telling them to turn back, but then I think about the life Ba would’ve had in China then and I feel guilty all over again. We’d all wanted a better life for our kids, but who would’ve imagined that this was it.

My daughter lives with her kids now, out near Sunshine. Would’ve visited today but the Marra floods after it rains, and the smell, oh god the smell. We were supposed to go to the beach down in Footscray together but that can wait. We’re all just waiting anyway, I suppose, sitting ducks dreaming of V-shaped formations and clean skies and home.

This has always been our home though—shit, I don’t even look Chinese. This is the only home we’ve ever known, even if it isn’t our home, or the home we chose. And so, we wait.

I sip my coffee and cherish its rareness. In the morning, the galahs still sing.

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CREATIVE

i miss swanston street

Joanne Zou

They say that 0.01 centimetres is the urban space of possibilities: the distance between people (connections, separation) in the bustling city. It’s easy to get lost inside a crowd (or to lose yourself).

Claim the rhythms of heartache and caffeinated loneliness and suddenly you’re not special or strange. You’re (the same as) everybody else just trying to get by: waiting for trains; pacing the grocery store; dwarfed by sleepless skyscrapers; missing the train; missing people; burning with (unhideable, untameable) emotion; feeling like too little; feeling like too much.

The city is alive, darling, and being (nobody) leaves you free to be whoever you want.

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Illustrated by Rohith Prabhu

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CREATIVE

When There Was Peace Ariyo Ahmad

After Katie Hale Our dove has flown for sixty years But she still hasn’t moved a mile Not to talk of reaching her shore In the armpit of our dwelling (We hide our hairy shame) When peace visited our faces We served him poisoned food It is left for a mother To let her children walk in the dark And we have burnt our shade of peace With smiles painted on our faces We took the honey of our land The storm rose like heavy noise Rain enveloped the land But we never lost our glory We enjoyed amnesty in surplus Under the canopy of our leader We sleep in peace, opening our hands And sacrifice for our stomach idol Our bird has flown for sixty years But she is still testing her wings

Illustrated by Anya Wong

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FARRAGO CREATIVE

Fallen

Ariyo Ahmad

I have not fallen from the spine of my mother Because she always grasps me tight to her back Nor did I slip from her arm When she threw me into the sky of freedom To embrace the whispering wind Because her hand is a swimming pool Where I embrace the warm waters of affection I have not fallen from the mountain cliff When I climb to see the vastness of the city At my kneecap I have not fallen into the oasis of love Not only because I am at the peak of loving myself But because I am afraid to fall recklessly Into the thorns of heartbreak Like slanting sun on the flesh Of the high mountain I fall into a lagoon of errors with a popping sound I fall into a jar of milky memory That wasps around me; a spiders’ web With her shawl cuddled around my wound Like a newborn baby I fall into the eyes of my mother

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Illustrated by Rose Gertsakis

CREATIVE

Surrender Of The Seasons Poppy Willis

Dappled sunlight trickles through the eucalyptus overstory.

The faded bark of a swamp gum crunches underfoot.

An afternoon breeze thaws out the wattles, scattering their scent and seed.

Lorikeets demand to be heard.

Pedestrians wave down passing cars, a mark of solidarity more than anything; “Watch out! There’s an echidna on the road.”

Then the cold sweeps in startlingly, with the patter of possum steps on the tin roof at night.

The presence of a wintry gleam on the car windshield is an inconvenience at first— we learn to live with it though, love it, even.

Broad beans bulge out of the soil, thriving in the winter sun.

Quite at its leisure, the downpours cease and the remaining tears drip from the withered leaves of weakened but enduring flora.

Nature’s lamentation has dried up like a snowberry in the sun, and silence is as abundant as the cloudbursts had been.

Sorrow gives way to cathartic sunlight.

An end to midyear despondency.

The cycle begins again.

Illustrated by Zino Feng

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NONFICTION

The Allure of the Past When the Present’s a Bit Grim Elizabeth Seychell

A midst this year’s seemingly endless cycle of bad news, there are moments when quite simply, it all

gets a bit much. The need for pure, unadulterated comfort strikes, and it’s moments like these when I slip into my pyjamas, pull up the covers, and type into Netflix the very key to instant, delicious escapism: pride and prejudice Much to many Colin Firth fans’ chagrin, it’s the Keira Knightly one I’m after. And it doesn’t matter how many times I’ve watched it, that scene where Darcy proposes in the rain and insults Elizabeth’s family and she snaps back with ‘um yeah, thanks but no thanks, you arrogant prick’ and he’s nothing short of monumentally crushed gets me EVERY SINGLE TIME. Maybe it’s the gloomy sky, their dishevelled, rain-drenched hair, or the way the camera slowly looms towards the actors’ faces until the very last moment where they’re about to kiss, but they can’t (just yet!). Whatever the reason, this moment never fails to steal my breath for just a second or two. It’s a standard romantic rejection scene, yet it crackles with an electricity that makes it far more memorable than most contemporary rom-coms. There’s something about this encounter that immediately pulls me out of the present, thrusting me into a fairytale world where romance is the great struggle, the great triumph, the great goal of life: the perfect reprieve for moments like now, when real life feels just a little too cruel, and far too unlucky.

By historicising the plot, the period piece takes the comforting romance of a contemporary rom-com and elevates it to fantasy. In a world of balls filled with dancing, empire waistlines, and the swirl of string quartets, where young ladies take a leisurely turn around the drawing room and days are spent waiting in anguish to hear from one’s unspoken love, it’s easy to sink into this landscape of grand romantic gestures and stunning natural landscapes. Watching the Bennet sisters frolic around the English countryside, I can’t help but be pulled into their seductively simple, rural life the same way I’m drawn to the whole cottagecore thing—it’s all flowing dresses, carefree hair tendrils, and glimpses of the sun setting over rolling hills. When for the majority of this year, we’ve been confined to houses, apartments and 5km radiuses, these films offer a sense of boundlessness that feels rather removed from our noticeably more cramped, contemporary urban landscape—glimpses into capacious castles and verdant pastoral landscapes where fields indefinitely stretch onwards. This sense of space heightens the fantastical aspect of these period pieces, offering the viewer a way to vicari-

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-iously experience a life that is not only emotionally, but physically different to the quotidian humdrum.

Whether it’s Pride and Prejudice, Anna Karenina, The Duchess, Atonement, or anything else from Keira Knightley’s filmography, there’s something undeniably powerful about the way these movies both look and feel.

Indeed, given the amount of money spent on their production, the aesthetic of a period piece is often deliberately disarming, smoothing out the more unsavoury historical facts of the era. Take Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette. A pretty pastry of a film, Coppola’s anachronistic interpretation of the last French queen glosses over the more unpalatable elements of the period’s history. With ceaseless shots of the Queen’s sparkling jewels, intricate pastel dresses, extravagant parties filled with champagne, gambling and sex, and above all, the magnificence of Versailles itself, it’s easy to get swept up in the sugar-high of Coppola’s aesthetic. It’s even easier to forget that while all this wealth is frivolously plundered, hordes of peasants march onwards to Versailles, angry and desperate amidst crippling economic inequality. The aesthetic allows us to look at this film less critically than we might if it were set in a more recognisably modern setting. Consider the story of a modern-day dictator hosting grand parties while the rest of the country sinks further into poverty. It’s a slightly harder sell. But because there’s distance, it’s easier to romanticise events, to draw something sympathetic and alluring from circumstances that, when paralleled today, might sting too much to make for pleasurable viewing.

It’s important to note, though, that social criticisms still exist within these works—one only has to look to Austen’s novels to recognise the layers of satire and critique embedded in so many adaptations’ source material. But because these stories are set in such seemingly far away, foreign lands, it’s easier to forgo applying our contemporary moral tests to them. It’s why they make for such perfect doses of escapism: they allow you to enter a world that’s often beautiful, and fascinatingly different from our own, with problems that are emotionally engaging, yet not so much as to be actually painful. As we watch the Bennets contend with the fact that marriage must fundamentally be treated as an economic proposition, it’s easy to feel safely distanced from their predicament.

Though women still face gender-based marginalisation, and marriage and economics often remain deeply intertwined, the issues afflicting the Bennets are unrelatable enough for a large proportion of

Illustrated by Vivian Li

viewers; their problems neither incite direct identification, nor conjure the various ways gender still relates to disparities and disadvantages in modern society.

If, however, a period piece were to tackle something a little more pressing—let’s say climate change, or the destructive forces of late capitalism—then these issues become a little too uncomfortably “real”.

While we can still relate to the scenarios of falling in love, being betrayed, being frustrated at the expectations of those around us, or even feeling isolated within one’s community, period pieces still manage to preserve a distance between the past and the present, ensuring the issues which most urgently need our present-day attention remain out of frame.

By perfecting the delicate balance between familiarity and distance, the period piece offers the perfect excuse to retreat into an aestheticised rendition of the past when the present world becomes a bit too much.

As for me, now that the year’s looking slightly up, I no longer have the desire to watch as many period pieces as I did say, three or four months ago. You can still bet, though, that when the next season of The Great is released, I’ll be in my bed, cosied up, ready to delve straight back into a world of palaces, court politics and the intoxicating drama of royal romance.

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NONFICTION

A Third Culture Kid’s Experience: Sensing Your Belonging Klesa Wilson

T he girl I love thinks belonging looks like blank walls re-envisioned. Bedrooms of low-sheen warm white have become her cross-cultural companion, a familiar stalker and a friendly face, the constant same hue amongst the

apartments in her growing inventory. Several taped photographs offer small windows to past lives of different values: friendships with those she hasn’t seen in two years, a family portrait from graduation, and a Caravaggio reprint of Bacchus—these images are staples on her plain canvas, family and art, the enduring forces in her resettling. Though the act of taping photographs speaks to the momentary ownership of a space, a personalisation of the generic in temporary life, she doesn’t mind. These white walls speak of the possibility for new photographs, waiting to be taken beyond the door’s threshold.

The girl I love thinks belonging tastes like homemade fusion cooking. She gorges on store-bought ravioli that doubles as pasta or substitutes dumplings in noodle soup. She delights on mushrooms fried in kicap manis, on feta drizzled in sesame oil, and miso butter mixed into scrambled eggs. It’s sacrilege—she knows it. Perhaps it testifies to a deeper part of her dual-ethnicity that desires a blend of all the countries she’s lived in, a fusion much like herself. But her cooking in truth attempts to mimic the illustrious dishes from a decadent chef: her father, a master of multiple cuisines, allowed home to be a place to be satisfied to the full. Though her skills leave much to be desired, they soothe a longing to be wrapped in familial comfort.

The girl I love thinks belonging smells like reminiscence. Those inexplicable scents she can’t quite name, but catapult her to the moments she first passed them. There is a plethora: upturned dark soil that alludes to the air after a Bangkok monsoon shower; the sharp and sour bite of dung beetles making their home on her balcony in Bali; pungent odours drifting through the smoke of long-tail boats blazing down the Chao Phraya. Then there’s the sweet, salty, non-perfumed scents of loved ones—these she can never describe. Human scents are not like smoke that have cause for their potency. They just are, existing as lingering pieces of her heart she wished she could bottle and keep forever.

The girl I love thinks belonging feels like acts of kindness. Memories of her father bringing her tea every hour she studied, of her mother coming to watch her high school plays despite her busyness, the friends who would hand-write her letters saturated in secret jokes. Moving to Melbourne meant separation from this enduring Love, forcing her loneliness to manifest: downing gin in the slow hours of the afternoon, staring at the taped photographs, or finding solace in the corners of the internet that promised the false comfort of a nicer apartment, and a better degree. She, at first, did not belong in Melbourne where she could not find this Love. But as she found favourite coffee shops, the best parks to read books in, the loneliness turned to familiarity. She realised she would not belong anywhere if she did not give kindness to herself in this time.

The girl I love thinks belonging sounds like the synthesised beat of a cityscape. The huff of air as the train leaves the station, peppered with the canned voice announcements of where her obligations and desires are taking her. It’s the wind tunnels that wrap around tight corners of side alleys, before lifting up to the sky speckled with falling rain. Remaining silent amongst surrounding conversations, quiet in the consuming noise. Trills of metropolitan energy remain the same no matter the blueprint, speaking to a part of her that enjoys anonymity no matter the city she moves to. But when she’s finished her walk and the wind quietens and the people thin out, when the trains stop for the evening and she sits alone on the pier overlooking the inky rivers, she knows she is home.

Illustrated by Michelle Pham

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NONFICTION

The Curtain Calls For You To Think Doing it Right

Tzur Ko-Geen Rochvarger

I don’t think any of us can say that we aren’t aware of the trend that is the “remake”. We have Rebecca on

Netflix, The Boys in the Band from my previous piece, the fan favourite Disney’s Mulan retold, and a new version of the Little Mermaid is in the works. I’m not going to say that the movie industry is running out of ideas, because new ideas, plots and films are constantly being released; personally, I just feel less excited. Broadway, theatre in general, has that je ne sais quoi aura about them. Saying that I can’t lie and say that musicals and plays being released aren’t reimaginings of movies or revivals, I think I just feel more excited about them.

Yet, it seems like every remake or revival has some sort of issue with it - controversy, lack of research or care and it tarnishes the product. How do you get it right? We saw Hamilton retell the story of a very white America with almost an all POC cast and was received by thunderous applause. Across the big wide pond, another musical was acclaimed in greatness for the retelling of history — SIX the musical, a show about the six wives of Henry VIII; told by a girl group made up by those six wives. When binging trailers, interviews, sneak peek performances and listening to the soundtrack, I couldn’t help but notice that the actresses weren’t all white. It had me wondering, was there controversy? And if not, why is that? My consensus to the answer is that it lies in intent for production.

SIX is a musical written to give agency to the women who history has silenced and made two-dimensional.

It is a product of the HERstory movement — a feminist approach in humanizing the women he married, mothers to his children. It pays homage to the greatness of these figures in English history. Rejection, divorce and being an object of the male gaze for the sole purpose of a blood heir are things I think a lot of women can relate and empathise with.

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I think that the creative team could’ve easily said we need six white women to depict these figures of history and no questions would be asked. Instead, they opted for colourblind casting, which results in encompassing the diversity of modern Britain; I dig it. The intent lay in telling an already told narrative, something that has been retold many a time.

For comparison, let’s take Mulan. An all-Asian cast was something to cherish and applaud and then Disney went ahead and ruined it for some. Their execution did not match their intent. Disney promised a more accurate retelling of the legend of Hua Mulan.

So how was it that to tell a Chinese story the creative team had not one Asian person at the helm? To me, this seemed counterintuitive to what they intended to do. If they set out to “right a wrong” and depict a beloved story accurately, it means to encompass the brain behind it as well. While SIX aimed to tell the story of silenced women, it encompassed all women. Mulan sat fresh in the discussion of a white Hollywood; so, if their intention was to give voice and recognition to an Asian narrative, they failed. They did the bare superficial minimum.

Doing retold narratives justice, through theatre, tv or film, all comes down to intention. Why is the story being retold? Is it for artistic fun, purely for money, or is there a want to be part of the social conversation?

If you plan on being part of that conversation, Disney, I’m looking at you, take a chapter out of SIX’s book because they nailed it. A pop girl group, made up of dethroned silenced queens, reclaiming their voices — definitely a bandwagon I can jump on.

NONFICTION

The OTHER Theory of Evolution:

Forget ‘Eureka’, the World Needs Your ‘That’s Funny’ Moment Tessa Marshall

R emember back in the day when people believed that infectious diseases were spread by toxic air instead of bacteria and viruses? When someone suggested giraffes’ necks were long because they stretched to reach the

juiciest leaves? Or when an accomplished chemist attempted to create mice out of soiled shirts? What dark, misinformed times—I’m glad we know so much better now.

Newsflash: we still live in those times.

Not-so-insightful prediction: one day, many of our “facts” will be considered well-intentioned hocus pocus.

There’s just one problem—we don’t know which ones they’ll be. And with the pace of discovery only intensifying (as we find ways to do more science, faster), many of these insights could be seen soon.

Of course, there are some things we are working deliberately and desperately hard to discover, because we know it will benefit us. We know we don’t know how to make an effective COVID-19 vaccine, or cure Alzheimer’s.

Teams around the world are consciously tackling these issues. Maybe our grandchildren will laugh at our current theories, but at least we’re aware of their flaws.

There are also some more abstract scientific mysteries. How exactly does paracetamol work? Why do we sleep?

What’s at the bottom of the ocean? It’s hard to know how answering these questions will shape our world.

But there are also unknown unknowns—by definition, impossible to predict. And we can’t pour billions of dollars into problems that we haven’t yet identified. Instead, we must rely on enquiring minds to recognise opportunities for discovery when they arise. For example, Alexander Fleming discovered penicillin by mistake, when a strange mould grew in his lab while he was away on holiday. But you need more than a pile of dirty dishes to change the field of medicine. The crucial next step was recognising the potential of this unknown fungus and investigating appropriately. As author and biochemist Isaac Asimov wrote, “The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not ‘Eureka’ but ‘That’s funny...’”.

Unfortunately, not everyone with a “that’s funny” moment has the skills or resources to explore further. This is why we need to invest in basic research, where scientists are free to pursue unlikely avenues of discovery. In basic research, you don’t know which area of focus will change the world. New medicine might be found in rare plants and animals—but which elusive beetle species should you investigate first? The secrets of forgotten civilisations may lie buried, but where should you start digging?

Basic research inevitably leads to dead ends. But that’s okay. You don’t need to be the one-in-a-thousand who makes revolutionary, world-shaking discoveries. Every dead end is a crucial scientific contribution, which ensures that future scientists won’t pursue similar dead ends. Mistakes and misunderstandings are a part of the process.

So once again, thank you to all the scientists who got it wrong in the past—and to all the scientists who will get things wrong in the future.

49

CREATIVE

A Puppet With Wings

Margarita Bassova

D

ear reader, I hope that I do not bore you. If my life were a colour it would be a bleak salmon pink. If it were a sound it would be an alpha wave. But not those alpha waves that aid concentration when you’re trying to cram 170 hours of study into one night; I’m talking about the alpha waves that dig deep into your soul and rearrange your heartstrings so that everything is felt with the disillusion of monotony.

Dear reader, I can’t get up. I’ve heard that jellyfish don’t have brains, but this jellyfish doesn’t have a mind.

Dear reader, last night I imagined a boy in my room.

He wore a floral bucket hat and stood in the corner, grinning at me with empty eye sockets that had been rewoven with expectation. When I said hello, he didn’t respond. When I walked up to him, on my tippy-toes so as not to frighten the lonely mouse in the cupboard, he remained coy—like those band bros that smirk at you from the other side of the Tote front bar. When I asked him what was happening, I wondered if he was an alien from the otherworld sent to nurse me back to health. When I reached for the light switch, I watched him vanish into thin air.

50

Dear reader, I am scared. Lily brings me buttered bananas and a pot of hot chamomile tea, but I don’t thank her. I see the words in my head but I can’t push them into reality; I can’t fish them from the fog. She closes my door, softly and meekly, adorned with a concerned expression that acknowledges the process of renewal. I don’t look her in the eyes.

“Get up, get dressed,” Lily asserts, swinging my door back open with the brazen intensity of an autumnal cyclone. I peer away from her and melt into the corners of my bedroom; a coffin brimming with negative space.

Evidently fed up with my feeble characterisation, she marches over and drags me out of bed, props me up like a puppet. She changes my long pajama pants, which I stole from my mother’s closet in Domodedovo, for a long floral skirt that flows unevenly at the seams.

She changes my Gordon Koang t-shirt, covered in last week’s tomato soup, for a collared top that opens just enough at the neck to see the star of freckles on my left collarbone. We walk to a local Ethiopian restaurant to have dinner with some of her friends from out of town. “Don’t worry”, she assures me, “they are the nicest people you will meet”.

Illustrated by Torsten Strokirch

“I’m Stella, nice to meet you,” I say as I insist on my right cheek for the kiss that has become customary.

We talk about niceties, about the failed medical systems around the world, about the Russian Revolution, about why some people have a second toe larger than their big toe. I try to play the part. Oh, yes, the healthcare system in the U.S. has failed the average casual worker and freelancer. Oh, yes, it was time for the oppressive, feudalist autocracy of Tsarist Russia to fall and discontent over World War I was just the catalyst. Oh, yes, I would sell photos of my feet for money if there was a big enough market for it.

“I’m just saying, electronic music is essential in the fight against digi-capitalism,” Lily rants as we return to our first-storey apartment on Smith St. We enter from the back, where the concrete smells like piss and we have to step over people using the entrance to our courtyard as a shelter. “Just think about it”, she continues, apathetic to the bodies lying asleep behind us, “hundreds or even thousands of people gathered in collective spirit without their phones, without technology, without social media”, she pauses, fishing for the key in her sports bra, “to rave in the bush to the murky sounds of 160 BPM jungle”. I don’t remember getting so drunk. She probes a response from me. I feel like I’m performing all the same actions that are required of listening, and yet all her words go in one ear and out the other. Sleep comes quickly and my pillow rushes up to meet me.

“You just need movement and stillness: exercise and meditation. When you feel like you’re going to fall asleep during the day, go for a walk instead,” Tim says, smelling of oak perfume and a sleepless night with his office secretary. I nod apprehensively, out of manners rather than respect, and leave. Nothing ever changes.

Dear reader, I must not take the train home. If I take the train that means that I will have to walk 12 minutes from the train station. That equates to a journey of 40 minutes altogether. Instead, I must take the bus. To take the bus I must first take one train for 30 minutes.

Then I get off in the south-east and I can ride a bus for 40 minutes. The bus stops right outside our apartment. The whole journey is 1.1 hours, but at least I do not have to walk. I don’t have the energy to muster one leg in front of the other.

“I think that you should ask for a higher dose,” Lily says as I clumsily wander up to our dining table so that we can sit in mutual agreement. The agreement is as follows: she cooks, cleans and looks after me.

I merely exist. Buttered bananas again. One more scoop and I will melt too. My legs would go first, they lack composure already. Then my stomach, my chest, my arms… all that would be left is the membrane of a jellyfish in a pool of butter.

Dear reader, Lily left today.

I ask my doctor for a higher dosage.

Dear reader, will I ever move without strings?

Sometimes the puppet master decides to get me out of his closet and take me on an adventure. On those days, I shower, I cook, I do my laundry. Sometimes I even make it to school or hand out a resume or two. On other days, the master leaves me in his closet.

On those days I shield myself from the world, hiding under the duvet of regret within the caving orange stained walls of this apartment.

“Have you been going for walks?” Tim asks. “Sure,” I answer. I don’t sound that convincing. “That wasn’t so convincing”, he responds. “Movement and stillness”, he asserts, as if he has all the secrets to wellbeing hidden under his chiseled beard and interlaced fingers. As if I haven’t studied psychology for years. As if I was unaware. “Like yin and yang”, he says, self-assured in his words.

“You are yin and I am yang,” Lily had said to me years ago—when we went out drinking at Obarska for her 21st birthday. “Yin is stillness and yang is movement”, she explained, “when I move too much, stress too much, get too anxious, I just think of you and I know that you are there to keep me grounded, to keep me still.” We danced for three days straight to the sounds of slow, dreary ambient-techno, only leaving the dance floor for the occasional cuddle puddle or cigarette.

Dear reader, I like to be alone now. I used to wail, just loud enough to be heard, just physically obvious enough that maybe someone would see me and ask me how I was. Eating was a rotten chore; I couldn’t walk the grocery aisles without sitting before the cans of crushed tomatoes and silently letting tears fall.

Now, I decide to revisit club Obarska—my first outing of my own volition in over twelve months, excluding my dreams.

“You smile like yourself again,” Lily says. I look into her eyes, wondering whether my strings will ever be tightened again.

51

CREATIVE

Grandmother Rose Elyssia Koulouris

Her fingers curve around the handle of the cup as she places English breakfast tea on discoloured doilies. Her gold tea set, something I wish to inherit, mocks me on the table. Her right hand rests near the doily, taking a much needed break from the lifting of the tea cup–the strenuousness of it.

The simple act that was once not even a fleeting thought is now a visible discomfort in rough fingers that once kneaded buttery dough, cupped my face and pegged table cloths. I look at the lines on her face while I sip the comforting familiarity of too much sugar and milk in tea. It warms like her famous chicken and rice upon my entrance.

She bends from her waist to sit, reminding me of my ballet class. Working on the barre, slow, steady, tense yet graceful as I plié down shielding my inner strain. She attempts to hide the discomfort in her hip, but fails the way I do in hiding my emotions. She could always read my face like a detailed page, now I can read hers.

My eyes linger on her face and I fear the inevitability of my future. Discomfort stings in my stomach and I adjust my posture. Her face is worn like my leather wallet but the distraction of her eyes, as green as the fields she ran her fingers through as a little village girl, comforts me.

In her eyes I see the trauma of a child who was taken from her mother and sent to Serbia. Though she learned classical piano and can still remember those four learned languages, when she returned to her mother years later, she was dismissed like an unwanted pest.

As we hold each other’s gaze–her eyes green, mine brown–I think of her desperation as clear as the wrinkles on her face. That desperation turned to wanting, turned to seeking a dream, turned to actively taking that first step on to the ship that brought her to Australia.

A small smile creases my face as she slowly sips her English breakfast tea.

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Illustrated by Yuk Kei Lo Yuki

‘Big Blush Cheeks’ by Dannielle Thorman

53

CREATIVE

snowshoe hare Meredith Tyler

childhood me watches the cold snow-encrusted darkness drape itself over backyard pines – little bruises, blue-black imprints in the snow trailing to the porch’s frozen underbelly – refuge from foxes mum says. after breakfast I will go out and make hare tracks with my mittened hands.

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Illustrated by Cathy Chen

CREATIVE

ptarmigan Meredith Tyler

into cracks spineless time slips fluid jellyfish – caught, only in your feathers’ wide net slung to trap the squirming future. you lend time your skeleton, old catskin croaker pussy willow bud.

Illustrated by Annette Syahlani

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CREATIVE

witches Annie Rose

moonlight bleaching bones in the trees carving sigils into thighs ice dripping from the

s p a c e between my legs you died under my feet i buried you in the weeds and the leaves sucked marrow from the fingers you shoved in me dry and dead leaves crushed between my fingers rubbing fragments together until dust covers my body the moon aches behind clouds holding back somewhere beneath the roots forced through your ribs and mouth i push my legs together crush your skull you are

nothing

but powdered fragments between my fingers sprouting up from trees the moon parts sunlight finds my shoulder blades barred kissing the nape of my neck leaves dance to the floor naked i raise my arms silence

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Illustrated by Alice Tai

Art by Bethany Joyce

57

CREATIVE

LONELY HEARTS

ANIMAL Sea Hare – Hermaphrodite “A good time for all.”

Sup whores! Y’all ready for an orgy that would make Caligula blush? It’s that time of year Hermaphrodite Squad, get in formation! Mating doesn’t have to be boring, and like most activities, it’s more fun in a group.

So, here’s the deal: you, me and any other sea hares around make a chain. Then our bodies sort of turn half-dude, half-babe. So like, the sea hare at the front will act as the female to the one behind it. So, our back half receives and the front half busts a nut.

Hit me up if you’re down, honey. If we get enough friends, we can make a circle, and then everyone gets their rocks off. Protection is not required. Oh, and don’t worry about lube. We’re basically slugs, we’ll bring our own.

Don’t start without me, you know the party don’t start til’ I slide in!

Harriet Erotica

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Illustrated by Yena Kim

OF THE

KINGDOM Tessa Bagshaw

Male Greater Sage Grouse

Female Praying Mantis

“Come see me shake a tail feather.”

“I like to dive in head first.”

Alright darling, prepare yourself for the greatest flash mob you’ve ever seen. I’ll give you a show to ruffle your feathers. I know the kind of kids you want: talented, fierce winners! And you’ll get them from me.

I know I’m worth it. I’m not even fazed by competing with other (lesser) sage grouse.

Here’s how it’s gonna go down. Around 70 of us gents will come together as a group (a Lek). Then we’ll compete for the gurls’ attention by dancing and singing.

It’s pretty fancy. And don’t worry, you’ll know me when you see me.

“I don’t dance; I work, I don’t play; I slay, I don’t walk; I strut and then sashay.” On the 8-count I’ll inflate the air sacs in my chest (faux breasts), I’ll (tongue) pop for you, I’ll whistle and ultimately show you who the greater sage grouse is!

It’ll be a performance for the gods darling, don’t miss it!

Hey handsome, I sense a romantic in you. I’ll bet I know your type: skin as green as a forest, 6 legs that go all the way up and 5 eyes to get lost in. That’s me.

And I predict that’s also you. But there’s something more, isn’t there? An edge that you crave. A risk...

I’m aware of those scandalous rumours that us ladies eat our mates after an amorous romp. Though I would like to point out that’s not always the case, there’s around a 28 per cent chance that I’ll eat you after or during our romantic encounter. Do you like those odds? I sense you like a little danger, and something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman.

My love is to die for.

Passionately yours, Cannibella Licktor

Ciao, Bobby Fosse

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60

‘TWENTIES in the 21st Cenutury’ by Elmira Cheung

57

62

Art by Franki Stackpool

63

NONFICTION

A Sense of Belonging:

Democratising Literary Festivals Post-Pandemic

Ana Jacobsen

W

ith over fifty writers festivals in Victoria alone, it can seem an overwhelming prospect to choose which ones to invest time in going to. For people outside of the industry, it can also sometimes feel intimidating to attend such events in the first place. Last year, I went to the opening night of the Melbourne Writers’ Festival with a couple of friends. As soon as we arrived at the pre-talk networking event, I found myself feeling very conspicuous in my bottle green jumpsuit amongst a crowd of very attractive intellectuals, most of whom were dressed in black. I panicked and began searching for the bar.

As someone who has always loved writing and is working towards a career in publishing, the fact that I felt out of place is revealing of how often the literary world, along with other arts communities, can seem to be an impenetrable and daunting space for outsiders of the industry.

Ellena Savage once asked ‘What even is a writers festival?’ and this question alongside ‘Who are literary festivals for?’ still requires consideration. There is a risk that these events can become echo chambers for the literary middlebrow (a term that I admittedly feel in two minds about) when ultimately, shouldn’t the purpose of them be to encourage more people, from all kinds of backgrounds to be excited and invested in literature and ‘the Arts’ in general?

“

The audience… is typically represented as a body of populist and popularizing consumers, uncritically engaging with the mass-culture produced and propagated in the festival setting.

“

In her insightful paper, ‘Conceptualising audience at the literary festival’, Millicent Weber describes how ‘The audience … is typically represented as a body of populist and popularizing consumers, uncritically engaging with the mass-culture produced and propagated in the festival setting.’ But of course audience members are engaged individuals who seek out events involving authors they love for a multitude of reasons. It’s not to say that organisers of literary festivals are solely responsible or even capable of controlling the outcomes of attendees’ experiences but during a time when federal funding for the arts is near non-existent, perhaps it’s important to consider new approaches in order to engage wider audiences and create a heightened interest in sustaining the literary world in Australia.

Earlier this year, whilst volunteering at one of the last major events in Melbourne that could be held before COVID-19 forced so many festivals to cancel or transfer online, I was approached by an attendee and pitched ideas on how the program could be improved.

64

While at the time, my eyes glazed over as I thought about all the tasks I needed to be doing while he spoke to me about things that were far beyond my control, later that day I reflected on one of the suggestions this man had made. To briefly summarise, his idea was to provide an opportunity for people from the same state to connect by gathering in groups of our respective home locations around the hall we were holding the event in. His suggestion wasn’t radical – he was effectively proposing state-based networking – but it got me thinking about what dynamic is set up when the experience of most attendees at an event is to witness experts on a panel speak up on a stage whilst they remain in a crowd of anonymity on the floor.

“

… how effective are festivals at getting attendees… to engage and invest long term in the literary world with the ongoing enforcement of this ubiquitous active/passive dynamic?

“

Listening to experts, or successful writers and publishers in the case of literary festivals, is important but how effective are festivals at getting attendees, let alone those who want to go but feel too much like outsiders, to engage and invest long term in the literary world with the ongoing enforcement of this ubiquitous active/passive dynamic? Surely it is counter-intuitive to building a sense of community when this structure remains?

In light of the global pandemic, literary festivals across the world have made the necessary transition to become digital, online experiences and this change may give us insight into how industry events within the world of literature and beyond can be reimagined in a more democratised and collaborative way post-COVID-19.

Online, there is greater accessibility for people with disabilities and the fact that people can attend events from the comfort of their own homes means that anyone who may have previously felt intimidated by the sometimes exclusive spaces that literary events tend to be held in is more likely to feel comfortable attending. Digital events are also by nature, cheaper to run and therefore more economic for attendees, plus the virtual realm allows for both synchronous and asynchronous communication, which gives community-building a new kind of flexibility and potential. I don’t believe that online events are necessarily superior to ones held in ‘real life’ but the affordances provided to us by digital platforms should definitely be considered and adapted to future literary festivals.

CREATIVE

where were you when i was still kind?

Birdy Carmen

He leans back on wooden chair crimson with murmuring firelight reddening thins of cabbaged ears bright cheeks porous to the cave-like warmth, still bellows exhume tonically: two Omeprazole nightly Old eyes faded blue as connect-the-dot veins meandering rice-paper arms he blinks and stories rise: twelve years and strapped car-wise on a Saturday guffawing glassed father staring through windscreen white fogged intensity. you don’t know it but his scars still shine undermoon and his hair didn’t always sit curled with shame or fear; and you’ve never seen his right arm but maybe he’s just sensibly modest. you lean back as he leans outward unwound window to pastel-coloured crowds and patent-leather in domed shadow yells where was god in the death camps?

Illustrated by Elmira Cheung

65

FLASH FICTION

‘close’

Teck-Phui Chua

They stood, scattered across the field, heavy heads bent down touching the ground. Dawn broke and the warmth of the sun’s rays evaporated the dew off them, bringing them back to life. Slowly they stretched up, straightening themselves, facing up towards the sky. Their bright white petals popped open one by one revealing the hidden pollen inside. Their faces turned as the sun moved, their petals spread as wide as the sun’s rays.

Slowly the petals closed, hiding their golden stash. The sun left and the cold overtook the warmth as the daisies slowly bent down towards the ground again. The day came to a close.

Vanessa Lee

bygone times I remember closing my fingers against the night sky, trying to catch stars and cradling them with friends; sweet and true in the way little kids are. We wanted a little wonder of our own. So, we reached out to the skies and listened to unseen stars whispering their hopes; reflections of bygone times. As each day and each year come to a close, I wonder if you ever think of those simpler moments as often as I, when time slipped by syrupy-slow and we forgot to keep an eye on the clock as we grew older and older.

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Illustrated by Jing Tong Teo

Mark Yin

Doors You open your phone 你打开手机 And you extend your hand as f a Now It is the medium through which you touch Taste smell see and hear You reach and you reach and you reach And then, when you close your phone 你把手机关闭时 You can’t quite tell if you’ve built Walls

r as it will go, because here and

Or doors.

Nicole Hegedus

A hand plunging down my throat, into my stomach. Fingers groping against soft flesh, organs, veins. Searching through acid and bile, it is horribly dark. Warm, but black. Your fingernails are short. I wonder, do you still play the guitar? There is no feeling inside. Nothing to feel. Nothing solid to grasp. Nothing but entropic little pieces enmeshed and bound into fluidity. Chaos and order. The pain is long gone. Some would call it closure. We are perfect opposites. Counterparts. Bound by our disunity.

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68

NONFICTION

Trash Lit

Emily White

W hen I was 15, I wrote 11,000 words of Merlin fanfiction. To this day, it is the most successful thing I’ve

ever written – I still get emails every time someone reads it and clicks the fanfic equivalent of the ‘like’ button. I was a virgin, I didn’t know how sex works, but apparently, I’d read enough smut to be able to write it convincingly.

When I was 16, I watched porn for the first time because I couldn’t figure out how scissoring works. Logistically. So, I sought out a visual aid.

When I was 17, I had to express great disappointment in my friends who went to see Fifty Shades of Grey at the cinema. I was shocked they would even be interested. Didn’t they know how bad it was? Didn’t they know it was trash?

It was at ‘trash’ that we hit a point of miscommunication. They thought I was critical because of the sexy sex stuff. Actually, I hated it because of the negative and inaccurate portrayal of BDSM practices, and glorification of stalking and rape. People had been talking about that for years, I thought everyone knew.

Fifty Shades of Grey is an interesting example of trash literature, sitting in both camps of fanfiction and the romance novel. These are two forms of writing that are automatically relegated to the lowest artistic tier because of the sexually explicit content. And because meme culture is a thing, the worst examples of writing in these genres are likely to become the most famous.

Hence, trash.

The Western distinction between ‘high’ and ‘low’ art is deeply rooted in sexual, racial and gendered prejudices. Art galleries are full of naked women, which is ‘high’ art because they are the object of the male gaze. The Rowdy’s catalogue is full of books about women getting naked, too, but this is ‘low’ art because a woman enjoying herself for herself is pornographic (but doesn’t porn serve the male gaze as well? The patriarchy strikes again!). Romance is overwhelmingly written and read by women. Paintings in galleries are overwhelmingly created and curated by men. In this dynamic, male sexuality is sacred, female sexuality is degenerate, and non-binary sexuality was only invented yesterday, according to the zeitgeist.

Even now that I’m a 20-something, my relationship with smut is still based on practical necessity. When I can’t sleep due to noise pollution because the possums living in the tree outside my house are horny as hell and want everyone to know it, I turn to the Rowden White Library’s catalogue of eBooks (brought to you by the Student Services and Amenities Fee!). Turns out, some good old-fashioned Scottish highlander smut is an exceptional cure for insomnia.

I catalogue my chronological interactions with sexually explicit material through the years because I’m part of a society in which people learn about sex by interacting with such content. My sexuality has been shaped by external forces; it’s hard to tell the difference between what is me and what is internet.

To add a layer of drama, there is a growing community of “romance readers” online who are getting sick of the reputation plaguing their favourite genre. Fans are more and more defensive on behalf of the genre, and content creators who trash-talk romance can now face big online backlash and get sucked into a whole week of arguments on Twitter.

The conflict between what is porn and what is art seems a lot more eternal than the conflict between smut and literature. But we don’t see communities of “porn enthusiasts” demanding to be taken seriously in the same way as romance readers. I am intrigued by these people who have decided to incorporate their consumption of erotic stories into their identity, a label for themselves to proudly wear in their Twitter bios.

This could be a cultural turning point, an answer to the question: am I a bad person for reading smut, or am I only a bad person if I talk about it?

Perhaps this is one of those things we all do, but collectively pretend we don’t — like literary nose-picking.

The thing is, the Rowdy wouldn’t stock so many romance novels if y’all weren’t so damn horny.

Illustrated by Apapist Panichewa

69

CREATIVE

A nd now for the very last woman of this series… golly gosh, truly, there’s no one else quite like her in

our short 100,000 years as a species! Agrippina the Younger was a member of the powerful Julio-Claudian dynasty, and is the only woman in history to be a sister, wife and mother to three separate Emperors of Rome (WHAT a resume). Agrippina’s life took place amidst the political turmoil of the Roman Empire during the reign of the Julio-Claudian dynasty.

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To say her life was tumultuous is just a wee bit of an understatement. Talk about drama, her life tragically ended in an assassination ordered by her own son, the infamous Emperor Nero. But wind back a few years before all of that, and you’ll find she made a political manoeuvre that was the very definition of badass… (but please note, I do NOT condone marrying your uncle).

The drunkards’ raucous laughter quietened behind her as Agrippina stepped out onto the marble balcony, stone-cold sober. The mess of limbs and sweat had been enough to turn her off any celebration after so many years of isolation and sobriety. She had forgotten what a proper celebration had looked like, let alone one thrown by an Emperor of Rome.

Inside were hundreds of guests, all invited here by her uncle to mark the joyous occasion of her return from exile. Agrippina yearned to just be near her son, who’d doubled in both size and age in the years she’d been gone—but nevertheless, she’d attended out of gratitude and duty.

Rome glistened before her as the cool marble soothed her soles, aching from hours on her feet spent darting from one conversation to the next.

She couldn’t help but sigh.

The city that stretched out before her was so recognisable, yet somehow so grossly foreign. She was tense, aware of every movement and breath as sweat clung to her back, not yet readjusted to the climate.

It was the early hours of the morning, the time when she would usually be lying awake with her younger sister curled up at her side, praying to the gods for someone to come and sweep them off their feet, to put an end to their suffering. There had been times when she’d yearned for own death. Other times, she’d yearned for her brother’s.

After all, it was he who had banished them to live out their days in poverty.

After so many nights of wishing, somehow, Agrippina’s wish had come true. A few days later, they had been carted back to Rome and welcomed back like royalty. Her brother had been declared insane and was overthrown by the very men who had sworn to protect him. And now her uncle sat in his place, the useless oaf that he was.

Emperor Claudius, no better than Caligula—and only slightly more stable.

She turned back towards the party, eyeing off Claudius and his wife, the infamous Messalina. Agrippina couldn’t help but admire the woman. So far, she’d managed to sleep with six members of the Senate, two of whom had declared their undying love to her over their slopping goblets of wine tonight. And this was only what she’d been told upon returning to Rome, an old childhood friend filling her in on all court gossip. Even now, Messalina was bold enough to be sitting in the lap of a former consul, her head tossed back in exaggerated laughter as he gawked down at her cleavage. One could not help but respect her nerve.

But Messalina would have to go.

Agrippina’s mind wandered back towards her early childhood, when her father had been Tiberius’ named successor, and all had been well. Claudius always had a tendency to dote upon her, and even at an early age she was able to pull his strings this way and that in order to get whatever she wanted. A new gown, a nice pair of earrings, the chance to accompany him to the Senate and secretly sit in on the debates and law makings. A young girl had never enjoyed as much freedom in Rome as she had.

There was already talk of who Agrippina would wed next, considering the death of her dear late husband. Another rich man would come. He would also soon go.

She had spent all those years in isolation fantasising about the death of her brother and the prosperity it would bring to the Empire. But now she was in amongst the action once again. It was time to start planning for her own future, for her son, who was no longer the child of a disgraced family, and for herself. She still had thirty good years left, and in no way intended to live them on the sideline.

Perhaps she should have learnt her lesson to first time.

Plotting the disposal of an Emperor was tricky business, but she knew how to be cautious.

Agrippina floated back into the party, resting a hand on Claudius’ shoulder and steering him away from the mayhem. Her wresting for control had begun.

Illustrated by Stephanie Nestor

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CREATIVE

THE CHERRYMAN:

Roots of Balm and Toil

Lee Perkins

ColdTheashstains from the clouds of dawn. are my doing, the bitter cold freezing

thought.

All that cracks through is the question, that if I was exiled on spray and foam, how could I not have seen the molten crags of this tumultuous pardon?

Below stretch the ditches and roiling soils of a country in agony.

Shale and bedrock grind beneath fields in patterns not felt since the First Light.

I feel not earthquakes, but the tearing and the cries of a beast woken in the midst of its slumber.

On this parched mound, the dawn coming into a redness, I recount to myself the stories of the Thegn.

These were creatures who, from the caves of Tru at Spring’s first breath, would descend into the countries to slay daemons, their strangelings, and the other horrors plaguing innocents behind the mist of daybreak and the fog midnight. The priests of the Blackrock told me most often of the Thegn’s Making.

To scare my divinity into submission, they would twist their voices with the Rock’s black magiks and stoke fear into tales of how the Thegn’s masters would chant with the Olde-born, and mix their ancient toils into potions of black rosemary and heathersborough.

Steamed black and burnt ice would be poured down their throats.

Bodies as clay, thoughts suspended but their nerves still twisting around the bones and sinew bewitched and bent to prepare the Thegn for the hexes and un-worldly strengths of the daemons’ strangelings and their evils.

The fear of this has been stoked into my mind.

Sleepless chambers dark nights and the hot anxiety of never-ending war drums, the slow dripping of underground.

Chased the divinity from my soul.

Brought me closer to faith.

Given back over these countries in the mist of half-being, I found these sleepless chambers.

Baking in the hot breaths of the Olde-born, all a-grumble from the marching above.

To stop the echoed cries of the Blackrock, they shared their spinnings with me.

The Toils of the Roots born from their magmous hearts.

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With the Toils I have wrenched the Blackrock from its roots.

In its heart, its caverns of blackwood, I have sowed the pip of a cherry tree.

Given to me by my divine father, I have sung and breathed it, and it has driven me to ridges surrounding this country to watch its iron leaves claw canyons from the cracked beds of Stormwater and fix themselves in the old cobbles of Poth.

From Westgate-in-Steam the cysts of the Earth burst and sputter the remnants of the sour evil here, and the pip’s roots toil the soil and twist shale as sinew amongst bones of bedrock.

The stench of black rosemary lingers, I sit to fold my legs.

The songs of Making thick on my tongue, pour from my mouth.

My duty begins.

- - On the fifth day the Toil ended.

From ash to sleet to the clarity of Spring, the Rock’s roots rose as stones varnished by the gleaming of new birth.

Silver canopies only dappled by the creek-canals sprayed and cleared shadows, the city one once more.

Waystones of cherry root flittered the countryside.

Under morning mists and full moons the white trunks and earth’s pillars glittering, bright shining were cast.

Atop a new throne sat a Thegn in blue.

Kendyl of the First Rise First of Her Name had been crowned by fate.

It is said that on the fifth day her throne room was filled with the chimes of the canopy above, caught in the wooden goblets of the merry drink.

Into the souls of her rooted kin.

The country once known as Zatlo was now Dj’uper.

In the rooted tongue this meant deep, for Kendyl, of the Rush and of the New Wind, had given herself to the roots, and tied the kingdom’s straying to her own life, that the Toils should never again steep so low.

So pained.

Illustrated by Anya Wong

- - It is here that the legend ends.

Peoples of the countries and the veiled creatures of the morning mists, Thegn, the daemons and the hunted strangelings step less and less, patter less and less atop the caverns of Olde To be and bygone, the world lingers on.

Yet bogmen and the twisting peaks feel the thrum of the rooted truth.

Blood and olive base under Kendyl’s strength, song from morn to chant at night, there rest the folded legs under furrowed brows of the White Robe.

None know of his duty, his purpose.

All is felt that is sung at the door, For to passages and histories told, The Cherryman, forevermore.

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CREATIVE

Art by Paris O’Rourke

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VERSUS

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Indoor Plants Outdoor Plants Abby Yelland

IbeenthinkonweEarthcanforall millions agree that plants are great. They’ve of years and they provide

food, shelter and oxygen for us. There’s something about plants that have made people bring them inside for centuries, from the ancient Egyptians, to 17th century aristocrats, to millennials today. Does this mean that indoor plants are better than outdoor plants?

Studies have proven again and again that plants have a plethora of health benefits. The Chalmers University of Technology in Sweden found that plants reduce stress, and Nature Therapy, which originated in Japan, found that a walk in nature lowers blood pressure and re-energises the mind. Other studies have shown that plants can change the electrical activity in our brains, have positive benefits for our heart activity, and purify the air which allows for an increase in oxygen. Given that being around plants has so many benefits, why wouldn’t you want them in your home? Having plants inside brings these health benefits inside, where you need them, meaning that your stress levels stay consistently lower.

Even though I love my indoor plants, I also love getting outside and seeing plants in their natural habitat. I grew up in the Dandenong Ranges and spent a lot of time in the temperate rainforest, and I’d been getting the health benefits that plants offer from a young age. It wasn’t until I moved to England as a teenager that I realised how much living amongst nature kept my mind clear and just how great the air quality was. From my bedroom window in Surrey I could only see one tree, which was vastly different to my bedroom window in Melbourne where all I could see was trees. I think even if I had indoor plants, I still would’ve craved the smell and sight of gum trees.

Having plants inside makes the place feel more lived in and brings life to the space. The other week when I took all the plants from my room and gave them a good watering in the bath, my room looked completely different and felt empty. Plus, it’s very therapeutic going to a plant shop, picking a plant that suits you and your space, picking a pot and then finding a place for it in your home. You’re able to learn about plants and learn how to take care of them.

Also, it’s a proud moment when your plant grows a new leaf, because you’ve nurtured it for weeks and months and now there’s proof that it’s happy.

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While all plants need some sort of maintenance, outdoor plants usually need less, especially if they’re native plants. Personally, I find the time I spend watering, polishing leaves and potting my plants really calming. It forces me to slow down and be present.

You may not want this though. It can take quite a bit of time each week depending on how many plants you have and how different they are. Some need watering more often, and you may find that you’re having to water nearly every day. If you’re someone who wants the perks of being with nature but doesn’t want to spend lots of time taking care of it, then you’d probably prefer outdoor plants.

However, with indoor plants, you can spend time with them whenever you want. If it’s raining outside, or it’s so hot that thinking makes you sweat, then you don’t always want to go outside to get your plant fix. If they’re inside (and in every room) then you don’t have to go anywhere at all. You also have complete control over how many plants you have, which plants you have and where they go, unlike outdoor plants where you might find weeds and plants may germinate all on their own.

It’s important to remember that all indoor plants are outdoor plants somewhere. Without these plants that grow in nature, we wouldn’t have any indoor plants. However, indoor plants are more flexible, and can be put anywhere. They allow someone to completely personalise their space while also adding a multitude of health benefits. Purified air indoors is something I think we all need more of, which is why I think indoor plants are better than outdoor plants.

If you’re thinking about getting some indoor plants, a great starter is the snake plant. They’re super tough and perfect to keep by your bed. Monsteras are also a super easy plant to care for, just be aware that they grow quite big, and fast. If you buy some new plants, make sure you do some research to understand how to take care of them. A quick Google search is all you’ll need.

Illustrated by Phuong Ngo

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“Death...Rebirth” by Wendy Lin

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‘Show Off’ by Angelina Koh

FODDER

‘CLOSE’ PLAYLIST

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Happy Ending — Mika Good Luck (feat. Lisa Kekaula) — Basement Jaxx Honey — King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard Heat Waves — Glass Animals End of Time — Beyoncé Sticks & Stones — Jónsi (Song for Tharidi) Post Break-Up Sex — The Vaccines The Special Two — Missy Higgins (Song for Sarah) Closer — Tegan and Sara Juice — Lizzo (Song for Amber) Eagle Rock — Daddy Cool R U 4 Me? — Middle Kids Wildflower — 5 Seconds of Summer The End of the World — Sharon Van Etten No Surprises — Radiohead Still Don’t Know My Name — Labrinth Close To Me — The Cure I Know The End — Phoebe Bridgers Closing Time — Semisonic The Final Countdown — Europe (Song for Beth)

Illustrated by Steph Markernick

The Media Office would like to acknowledge the True Custodians of the land on which we work, the Wurundjeri People of the Kulin nations. We pay our respects to their Elders, past and present. We extend our acknowledgements to the First Nations students and staff members in the University of Melbourne community. The land we are on is stolen and sovereignty was never ceded.