Gf mar apr 2018

Southern Minn

FREE

EARLY SPRING 2018

Girlfriends

Model on the runway

An international, yet internal, adventure in personal style Page 30

STYLE

Healthyskin. skin.Happy Happyyou. you.

Healthy

Submit your recipe for Southern Minn Girlfriends’

Let’s get 2018 cookbook Southern Minn

Girlfriends

Girlfriends Magazine is publishing a cookbook with the region’s best recipes – submitted by our readers – in advance of our 10th Anniversary “Let’s Get Cooking” show and expo on Oct. 18, 2018.

recipe categories: Apps, soups and salads // Main dishes // Desserts Submit as many recipes as you’d like. Our guest chef will select one recipe for inclusion in the cooking show and that individual will receive a $250 prize package! If we use one of your recipes in the cookbook, you’ll be eligible to purchase discounted tickets to Let’s Get Cooking.

Southern Minn

where local women

To submit your recipes, visit southernminngirlfriends.com and follow the recipe submission link.

Watch for more information on Let’s Get Cooking and for your chance to pre-order the cookbook at a discounted price.

Girlfriends

turn

NOTE from the editor

forkner Moe Beth Forkner Moe is the editor of Southern Minn Girlfriends magazine.

Find Southern Minn Girlfriends on Facebook

We’re still excited to be celebrating our 10th year with you – our readers and our advertisers.

Every issue is a new adventure, in which we try to bring you interesting, useful and thoughtful stories – as well as a bit of fun. We’re so glad to be on this journey with you!

Now that spring is in the air (whew!), we can begin thinking ahead to clearing out and cleaning out and making new beauty in our homes, our neighborhoods and in our lives.

This issue’s topic is that of “Style,” which can range from the internal and personal, to our homes, to gardens, to clothing, to our daily activities. Style can encompass literally every aspect of our lives. Many of the things we do each day relate to our own style, whether it’s what people see in and about us, to what we see as we go about our lives. It can be intimate and known only to those closest to us, or completely out there and in public.

Each of us has our own style – and it’s not always the same for each audience, each day or each situation. We hope we are giving you some ideas and ways to think about style – what it means to you, what it feels like, what it looks like….

This month we talk about women and their strength (and we’re excited to partner with the Steele County Historical Society on a couple of their events on this topic), developing a personal brand, learning about etiquette as a way to get ahead in the world. We share new gardening and home ideas, as well as fashion trends. We learn about how decluttering our family homes can open up space in our lives and hearts. And we hear from some beautiful women (inside and

out) about how they have overcome obstacles to become stronger at the same time they are encouraging other women on their own paths.

Our next issue, coming out in May, will focus on adventures. As with style, adventures come in many forms – personal, emotional, physical, spiritual, new ways of expressing ourselves…. or a combination of any of these.

We will tell stories about people’s adventures and ways to look for and create an adventurous spirit. If you have adventures - of any type - you would like to share with us, let us know!

We may even be able to include you and your adventures in the issue. Feel free to share on our Facebook page (we already have some great ideas from readers and look forward to visiting with a few of you!) or by emailing me at bfmoe@southernminn.com by the end of March.

We hope you enjoy this issue and get some new ideas and inspiration to gain balance in your life.

Happy spring, and happy styling!

P.S.: Save Oct. 18 on your calendar for Girlfriends’ “Let’s Get Cooking” show and expo – it promises to be a fun event! And see page 3 for details on the regional cookbook we’re publishing in advance of the show!

LOOKING FOR

fabulous?

DISTINCTIVE EYEWEAR & ACCESSORIES 425 Division Street South Northfield, MN 55057 507-366-2020 visionofnorthfield.com

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2018

20 Early Spring 18 MAR/APR

contents

features

6 Spring Forward

What’s trending in fashion this spring.

about us editor: Beth Forkner Moe

contributing writers:

Kari Berit Lisa Cownie Rian Dicke-Michels Mallory Fuchs Nancy Iglesias Trent Jonas E. Dawn Lippman Sarah Osterbauer Ramon Rodriquez Carron Meghan Rook Terri Schlichenmeyer Sara Schlueter Nicole Sweeney Isabelle Wattenberg Grace Webb

multimedia consultants: Kristie Biehn Ginny Bergerson Nicole Brandon Kari Clark Kathleen Davies Missy Daschner Pam DeMorett Tim Mart Mark Nelson Jay Petsche Erin Rossow Kyle Shaw Gayle Stelten

graphic designer: Kate Townsend-Noet

ad designers:

Mary Jo Blanchard Nicole Gilmore Jenine Kubista Kelly Kubista Kate McGillen Jennifer Schoenbauer Volume 10, Issue 2

Copyright © Girlfriends 2018 Published Mar/Apr 2018 by: Southern Minn Media 514 Central Avenue Faribault, MN 55021

southernminngirlfriends.com Send releases and story ideas to:

Beth Forkner Moe at Girlfriends magazine, bfmoe@southernminn.com

8 New Ideas for Home Building

or Remodeling

From “smart homes” to downsizing and more.

13 It’s HERstory to Share

Women’s history month events at Steele County Historical Society.

14 Zumbro River Fiber Arts Guild A group of fiber enthusiasts from Southeastern Minnesota.

16 Developing Your Personal Brand

Tips to grow customers through knowing your distinct style.

18 De-Cluttering Our Space to Soothe Our Soul

Eliminating the unnecessary.

20 How Does Your Garden Grow?

It’s never too early to start planning your garden.

24 Sell Your Home Fast

21 staging tips for upgrading your home.

26 Etiquette Matters Every Day

Showing respect to others and helping them feel comfortable.

30 PROFILE - Meghan Rook

An international, yet internal, adventure in personal style.

40 Getting to the Stage

A peek into the life of a figure competitor.

45 The Cat’s Meow

An autistic boy and his Bombay cat.

accessories

11 a man’s perspective 4 note from the editor

52 book review 38 the coach’s corner 12 food sense 50 unexpected caregiver 54 gf directory 49 wellness

on the cover & this page: Meghan Rook - See her profile story on page 30.

Now that the dreary days of winter are behind us, lavender, florals and satin will be here to brighten up our wardrobes.

S

By Sara Schlueter

pring Fashion week from New York to London saw tons of color headed down the runways. Denim got the glamorous treatment (skinny jeans with an evening gown, anyone?), and florals were mixed with stripes. Taking a cue from the Pantone color of the year, “ultra violet,” the softer shade of lavender is popping up everywhere. Here we break down a few of the biggest trends and key pieces you can incorporate into your springtime style.

Lovely Lavender With a certain romantic nature to it, a shade of lavender screams of warmer weather and brighter days ahead. While pastels in general are a hot trend this season, lavender is taking the spotlight. For a bold move, give a lavender trench coat a try. Bonus: Trench coats will be everywhere this season, and you can’t go wrong with the classic belted coat. To add just a simple touch of the hue,

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Photo from landsend.com.

top off your look with a lavender-colored scarf or statement earrings.

Where to Find?

Lands’ End has a fantastic cropped trench coat in a gorgeous wild orchid color, and give your local Primp Boutique a try. The stores and online site have a variety of lavender shades, and don’t forget to check out the pretty floral dresses and tanks.

Shiny Satin The perfect companion to lavender, this silky fabric will be popping up in everything, from blouses to pants.

The lightweight fabric is perfect for warmer days ahead, and cooler summer nights.

To fully embrace this trend, try wearing a

satin pair of pants to work. If you wear a looser pair of satin pants, top it with a crisp button-up to avoid a pajama look.

Add a bit of satin to your spring with a satin scarf or breezy tank.

Where to Find?

Check out J.Crew for a dark navy satin pant with a tux stripe to give your work wardrobe a serious update. Cliché Boutique in Minneapolis has new spring arrivals on site, and a must-have emerald green satin ruffled blouse is one of them.

Fresh Florals Who doesn’t love seeing bright flowers in the spring time? And what’s better than wearing them? Try mixing florals and stripes together lends for a new take on both patterns.

Accessorize with prints by adding a floral handbag to a solid color dress, or a striped top with floral pants.

Where to Find?

The Kate Spade Cameron Street bag takes a bold twist with bright flowers, perfect to pair with your little black dress. And if you are still on the embroidered trend, try a sweet button-up with floral accents. Local boutique Kittsona has many floral embroidered tops, but give the red pinstripe garden dreams top with red embroidered flowers a try.

Give some of these trends a try this season and give your look a fresh twist for spring. Remember to have fun; create your own look by finding that perfect style that gives you the most confidence. Happy spring!

Sara Schlueter is a magazine editor in the Twin Cities with degrees in journalism and apparel merchandising from Iowa State University. She is passionate about telling people’s stories and being involved in the community.

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New Ideas

for Home Building or Remodeling From “Smart Homes” to Downsizing – And More

F

By Lisa Cownie

rom tiny homes to big barn doors, housing trends from 2017 will largely carry over into 2018. But there is one new trend emerging that will make the year an exciting one for those in the industry.

“The newest trends for homes seems to be ‘smart home,’ Vonda Herding, broker for the Mankato office of Edina Realty, said. “I think we will see more and more people automating functions within the home, for example temperature, lighting, voice activation and security. Technology will extend into the home, making normal life functions more convenient and instantaneous.”

Herding also said downsizing will take on a whole new meaning in 2018, in the form of tiny homes. Across the country, tiny homes are all the rage as individuals are trying to find an economical, or even portable, living option. It can also give homeowners freedom from big

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mortgages and big concerns.

“I haven’t seen much (demand) for tiny homes in our market, but

I have heard people discuss them and did have a client inquire about the potential for a tiny home development.

Although they aren’t for everyone, the minimalist trend is more widespread. Even if people are deciding to hang onto their square footage, many more are starting to simplify both lifestyle and possessions,” Herding said.

Speaking of possessions, a kitchen table is one that many are opting to go without.

“Large kitchen islands are still top of people’s list when renovating their kitchen,” Beth Fasnacht, owner of Timeless Interiors of Southern Minnesota, said. “The island has become the gathering place and has replaced the traditional dining table.”

Herding agreed and said that while islands are certainly not a new concept, the way they are built is getting more progressive.

“New construction and remodeling projects are incorporating more of the bar/center island accent. Where the countertops don’t match throughout the home, the perimeter of the countertops are one color and material, and the bar/ island may be accented with a different color or material, for example, marble, granite or concrete, sometimes the island may also be a different type (of) wood,” Herding said.

The interchanging of types and colors of wood in a room has become the norm.

Concrete has always been a common building material, but is starting to become an option in a decorative context.

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CONTINUED FROM page 9 “Some homes are starting to sprinkle in the ‘vintage’ appearance as well, via light fixtures, sinks etc.,” Herding said. “Wood and wallpaper may have their place, not necessarily the paneling look of the 70’s, or the wallpaper borders of the 80’s, but (people are adding) more etched wood accent walls, or a bold wallpapered wall to make a bedroom or sunroom snap.

Bold colors and florals are making a comeback, too.”

Fasnacht said people are also experimenting with materials when incorporating “barn doors” in their homes.

“Barn doors continue to be the trend in both homes and offices,” Fasnacht said. “And what many are realizing is that a barn door no longer means big wooden ‘barn’-looking doors. Barn door track systems are available in rustic designs and very contemporary designs, which also correlates with the doors themselves. They can be anything from reclaimed wood doors to sleek frosted glass doors, whatever will coordinate with the style of your home. The doors can act as an accent in a stationary position on the wall next to an opening or be a functional sliding door.”

Fasnacht says the color game is also getting a bit of a punch.

“Everyone wants to jump on the ‘gray train’ but worry that it won’t work with their 80’s and 90’s era wood tones,” she said. “But, it can be done. There are lots of gray/taupe paint colors that will coordinate with virtually any existing wood tone. The key is to grab all the gray/ taupe paint swatch cards you can and bring them home to put next to your existing woodwork - even the colors you don’t like under the fluorescent lighting in the store. Look at them at various times throughout the day and evening; your home lighting and natural light can greatly change how a color looks. If you’re still not sure, there are plenty of interior designers out there that would love to help you choose one”

Those who choose the tiny house lifestyle tout many benefits of the phenomena. Those include: • Low or no mortgage • Portable housing • Small footprint • Energy savings The average size of a tiny house is between 100 and 400 square feet. That compares to an average of between 2,200 and 2,600 square feet of more traditional new homes being built. The smaller compact living space is attractive to individuals of all ages, including recent college graduates, newlyweds, or even retirees.

Lisa Cownie writes from North Mankato. Her work can be found at lisacownie.com.

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A man’s perspective

The inverse relationship between style and temperature

jonas Trent Jonas is a Twin Cities-based writer and divorced father of two. He is fascinated and frightened by women but is working through his issues.

E

very winter I see photos from places like New York, Boston, Philadelphia or Washington, D.C. In these pics, folks are wearing high heels or leather-soled shoes and light jackets or skirts that expose their legs in ridiculous temperatures.

I am proud to say that this is not the case here in Minnesota.

Oh, you’ll see the occasional dude in shorts or a brave woman in a skirt, but that’s in like 25-degree weather. We’re used to it. Twenty-five degrees is often the top end of a 50-degree temperature swing for us. But most of the time, our winter style can be defined in one word: Sensible.

Whether it means wearing boots to the office and putting on your shoes there or keeping your Love Your Melon hat on all day long, style and fashion take on whole new meanings in winter: The colder it gets, the less it matters. Only own one pair of long johns? Wear them until the temperature is below zero.

Yes, wool socks are appropriate indoor footwear.

Hat head is sexy and so is that stubbly facial hair that’s on our face because open pores are cold, and dry skin is itchy.

Your collection of un-removed ski lift tickets is a status symbol, and the fact that you wear a parka with the furry-edged hood up into St. Paul’s chi-chi Meritage will always be overlooked. So, wrap your face in two scarves — one vertical and one horizontal — and rock those Steger mukluks because in the North Star State, that’s winter style.

When it starts to warm up in March or April, we’ll start to shed our layers. And by the end of spring, we’ll be showing more skin than the rest of the country. Shorts and tank tops in 50-degree weather? You betcha!

And that’s the beauty of Minnesota and its people. Our style is dictated by the weather and the temperature — not some runway or a city that’s hundreds of miles away where folks are certain to slip and fall in silly shoes.

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FOOD SENSE Tbsp.

2 1 tsp.

1 tsp.

1 Tbsp.

1 clove

Ramon RODRIGUEZ Carrion Ramon Rodriguez Carrion is the owner of Ruf Acres Market. He can be reached at (@ Ramonsfoodsense) or (@Rufacresmarket).The market is located at 220 Central Ave, Faribault.

W

hile food and healthy eating is most importantly about nourishment and maintaining health, presentation and style offers another dimension of food for the eyes which can enhance the taste and overall experience of your meal. In these recipes, you will see that I am offering specific presentation for each food item. Please feel free to experiment or adjust if you prefer to offer your own style to the presentation of these two dishes, which comprise a generous meal when served together.

Warm Salad with Shrimp (for two people)

Ingredients: 12-14 uncooked whole shrimp ½-lb Brussels sprouts

1 orange 1 Tbsp. Cointreau liquor 12

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dried parsley salt ground black pepper olive oil garlic

Directions: Preparing the sauce: Cut the head off each shrimp and put the heads on a plate. Remove the garlic skin and cut the garlic into small pieces. Fry the garlic with ½ teaspoon of olive oil. Once the garlic starts to turn golden or brown, add the shrimp heads and fry until the skin turns orange or pink. Add the juice from the orange to the shrimp heads and garlic and continue to cook for 5 to 8 minutes. Then add the Cointreau and reduce to low heat to boil for another 6 to 8 minutes before adding 1 cup of water, dried parsley, salt and ground pepper. Simmer together for another 10 minutes. Remove the shrimp heads.

Cooking the Brussels sprouts: Cut each Brussels sprout in half and boil for 10 minutes.

Cooking the Shrimp: Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. Line a baking tray with parchment paper, arrange the shrimp bodies evenly on the tray, sprinkle with salt and the remaining olive oil and bake for 12-14 minutes. (Note, the shrimp should be eaten very soon after they are removed from the oven to ensure the shells can be peeled easily.)

Prepare two plates: Arrange Brussels sprouts on half of each plate and cooked shrimp on the other half.

Over the Brussels sprout halves, sprinkle the sauce made from the shrimp heads and then sprinkle some olive oil over the shrimp to finish.

Baked Haddock with Sauvignon (for two people) Ingredients:

4 medium-sized haddock fillets, frozen or fresh 1-½ cup Sauvignon Blanc wine

½ lemon (for juice) Salt 1 tsp. dried dill weed

2 potatoes Paprika Olive oil Sunflower shoots

Directions: Bake the Haddock: Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. In a baking dish, combine the Sauvignon, lemon juice and salt. Add the haddock fillets to the baking dish, and sprinkle the dried dill weed on top of the fillets. Cover the dish with foil to seal in the moisture while cooking and bake for 25-35 minutes.

Prepare the Potato Garnish: Wash the potatoes with a brush and slice them into slices about ¼ inch thick. Place potatoes in a covered microwave dish, sprinkle with olive oil, and microwave for 8 minutes.

Set aside until ready to serve the baked haddock.

Preparing two plates: On each plate, arrange slices of potato to cover half of the plate, sprinkle with paprika and salt to taste. On the other half of each plate, place the baked haddock fillets.

It’s

HERstory

HER tory

Voting Rights: Yesterday & Today

toMartha Share Micks, League of Women Voters Minnesota,

us through the impact of WWI in women achieving t vote Month and what is currently happening History events at with voting

Women’s Steele County Historical Society

M

arch is Women’s History Month. The last couple years have certainly shown how powerful women can be when they work and act together, just like a century ago. It was almost 100 years ago (1920) that the 19th Amendment to the Constitution was ratified, giving women the right to vote (at least white women. African-Americans were charged a poll tax, which many could not afford, so most African-American women did not vote for several decades after that).

The Steele County Historical Society (SCHS) is celebrating this month with some events showing the power of women and the importance of women’s friendships. Girlfriends Magazine is proud to sponsor these events and encourage women in our region to attend, learn and participate.

Several years ago, the organization decided to develop programming throughout the month touching on these themes and others, according to Stephanie Kibler, Meeting and Special Events Manager.

“Our goal is to show the impact women had and continue to have on shaping history. We call the series HERstory.”

The first event will be held Thursday, March 15, at 7:00 p.m. The League of Women Voters (LWV) will discuss the history of voting rights yesterday and today, from the impact of World War I in achieving those rights up until now. The Suffrage movement began under the cloud of the War, according to Kibler, somewhat mirroring today’s women’s movements. The timing of Suffrage varied from state to state, with the main impetus happening during those years.

“Women were speaking out then, as they are today, on every-

thing,” Kibler said. “This felt like a really good to tie this in.”

Martha Micks, of the Minneapolis chapter of LWV, will give an hour-long presentation, following by a Q&A session.

On Thursday, March 29, Lori Syverson will present “Girls Rock: The Healing Power of Girlfriends,” sharing the importance of girlfriends and how women relate to each other. She will talk about the role of friendships in our lives and how we underestimate that.

Syverson, an inspirational keynote speaker, author, successful entrepreneur and businesswoman from Edina, will discuss how researchers are paying attending to this and its importance to our overall health. Her program will be interactive and is appropriate for women of all ages (including teens and pre-teens).

“Girls Rock” will also begin at 7 p.m.

Both programs are free for SCHS members and $5 for non-members.

Even after Women’s History Month ends, SCHS will continue to energize women in their programming, according to Kibler.

On Thursday, April 26, there will be a program focusing on immigration and DACA (aka, “The Dreamers’ Act”). Sara Karki, an attorney at the Immigration Law Center of Minnesota, will discuss DACA, our country’s immigration system, with ties into and before World War I, including the local history of German and Irish immigrants. She will also discuss the impact of DACA on women, including mothers and grandmothers.

Again, the program will begin at 7:00 p.m., and is free for SCHS members and $5 for non-members.

For more information about these or other events, check out the organization’s website at www.steelehistorymuseum.org or contact Kibler at 507-451-1420.

Thursday, March 1

7–8 PM | Steele County History Ce

1700 Austin Rd, Owatonna Free: SCHS Members | $5 at the door: Non-Mem

SteeleHistoryMuseum.org EARLY SPRING 2018

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L

By E. Dawn Lippman

eslie Hall looks out on her garden drooping under the weight of a February ice storm and names the plants that will, in summer, provide color for her art. Woad makes a blue similar to indigo.

Weld makes yellow. She uses the roots of madder plants, she says, for beautiful reds. She names others like coreopsis, cosmos, and marigolds.

“I have a dyer’s garden,” Hall explains. “If you’re using the flower, you pick it before it blooms. You need a lot. It’s not a beautiful cottage garden, but it’s very satisfying.”

Hall is one of about 50 members of the Zumbro River Fiber Arts Guild, a group that meets monthly in Oronoco. She serves as treasurer for the group. From wheat weavers to knitters and those who crochet, to embroiderers and fabric and yarn dyers, participants gather to celebrate and support one another as they expand their skills and tackle new projects.

“The programs have been really quite diverse and interesting,” Hall states. “They cover all areas of fiber arts, from raising sheep or llamas or alpacas to carding the wool to spinning it into yarn.”

“It’s a lovely group of people,” she continues. “There’s no competition. Everybody gives what they can to the group. It’s just a lovely, diverse group of men and women.”

Zumbro River Fiber Arts Guild, which keeps a website with the same name, has been around for more than 40 years. Members come from all over southeast Minnesota. Some gatherings involve field trips, others include show-and-tell, and others feature guest presentations.

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Members also take field trips, visiting sites like the Faribault Woolen Mill Co. and Decorah’s Vesterheim Museum.

Laurice Johnson, vice president of the guild, is a rigid-heddle weaver. “It’s more of a portable loom versus a floor loom,” she says.

Johnson took up the craft about seven years ago. “My main focus is called saori style,” she says. “It’s kind of a free-form weaving that originated out of Japan.” She learned by reading books, as well as following and interacting within forums, where feedback is almost immediate.

“You treat it as an art, and you just kind of put your heart it in,” she says. “You’re not so concerned about making mistakes and not lining up your salvages perfectly and things like that. It’s more about mixing of yarns and colors and unique techniques.”

Johnson and Hall both emphasize the importance they place on continually learning new things and the energy they gain from guild activities. But the group’s impact and efforts extend beyond its members, particularly through its Chemo Caps initiative.

Thanks to yarn purchased with help from Join the Journey - a program that supports those affected by breast cancer - and donations from community members, guild members have knitted thousands of chemo caps for Mayo patients. They delivered 60 caps just in January.

Many members attend and present their work at art shows like the Zumbrota Art Splash and Shepherd’s Harvest, a sheep and wool festival.

“I think for most of us it’s a craft that we’ve taken up and enjoy doing,” says Johnson. “A guild is also a way to interact - you know, knitting and weaving and crocheting are sort of solitary crafts -- but if you belong to a guild, you get time to collaborate with other people and talk and get new ideas and inspiration. That’s what it holds for

me: inspiration and how to challenge myself.”

Hall often does her warm-weather dying on her deck. But cold weather doesn’t stop her.

She used, for instance, the roses her husband gave her for Valentine’s Day to make a print.

She incorporated carmine, a natural dye derived from the cochineal insect that lends shades of crimson and scarlet.

A retired infectious-disease researcher, Hall dyes and sells silk scarves at arts and craft shows and in the cities. And she, like several other members, teaches. She recently led a workshop at the Rochester Public Library on snow dying and teaches classes several times a year at the Textile Center in Minneapolis.

HERstory

HER tory

Now Hall is using her natural-dyed cotton and learning to quilt. Soon she’ll try dying with teas with a natural-dye group she belongs to in the Twin Cities. “Well, I did it in the 70s,” she says with a laugh. “But we’re going to try it again with different teas.”

“I see myself as an artist,” Hall explains, echoing Johnson’s description of the serendipitous process of saori weaving. “I do something with fiber several times a week. So it’s part of me.”

E. Dawn Lippman is a freelance writer and editor based in Winona, Minn. She holds a master’s degree in literary nonfiction. A mother of four, she loves the Appalachian Mountains, her garden and honeybees, and much good music.

Voting Rights: Yesterday & Today

Martha Micks, League of Women Voters Minnesota, will take us through the impact of WWI in women achieving the right to vote and what is currently happening with voting rights.

Thursday, March 15

7–8 PM | Steele County History Center 1700 Austin Rd, Owatonna Free: SCHS Members | $5 at the door: Non-Members

SteeleHistoryMuseum.org

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Photo from Stephani Johnson/In Fine Fettle.

Developing your

T

By Isabelle Wattenberg

wo mugs of dreamy-dark, froth-capped cocoa rest on a stone-cut counter. The inviting and indulgent scene is captured in a photograph that headlines a recipe for dairy-free hot chocolate on the blog In Fine Fettle. The blog shares the successful outcomes of cook and writer Stephani Johnson’s gluten-free, dairy-free and vegetarian cooking. Its unfussy design and focus on local, organic ingredients also reflects her personal brand - the concept that merges individual style and values into a public-facing business or service.

Developing a personal brand helps grow customers for your business or an audience for your art: an authentic, human message and distinct style encourages connection. But the most powerful

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outcome of creating a brand, according to personal coach Mallory Fuchs, is that it encourages a deeper understanding of one’s own identity and values—and the chance to build something from them. “[A personal brand] is representing not only your business but also you,” Fuchs said. “You need to know who you are and what you stand for before you begin to create your personal brand.”

Johnson’s blog also marries her personal history and drive to contribute to a community. In 2011, Johnson faced health issues that eventually revealed an intolerance to gluten and dairy. As she modified dishes to accommodate her new diet, a reservoir of recipes organically grew.

“My blog is an extension of my own food journey; that’s what shapes my theme,” Johnson said. “I wanted to create a place where people with food intolerances like mine could find delicious and beautiful food.”

In Fine Fettle simultaneously provides a space for a national

community seeking advice and recipes, and increases Johnson’s own creative outlet for recipe experimentation. Readers offer inspiration for new recipes, and their questions and comments reinforce her reputation as a trusted resource.

“I often have people ask me for advice about going dairy-free or vegetarian and other food-related questions because they know I’m a huge health food nerd,” she said.

Johnson includes her philosophy right on her blog: “Eat what brings you joy, listen to what your body’s telling you, be close to the food you eat, and buy organic whenever possible.” These traits are echoed in each recipe posted on the blog.

This consistency is a hallmark of a strong brand, Fuchs explained, because multiple messages can distract customers.

“This can be hard because we have so many beautiful ideas but we have to be careful that we don’t overwhelm and confuse our audience,” she said.

For Johnson, brand consistency also equals reliability.

“Everyone’s kitchen is different and the products available to them are different, so I’ve had some people comment on recipes that didn’t go well and I went back to re-test

them because I want my recipes to work for everyone who comes across them,” she said.

“I think being transparent is always appreciated.”

The other element of a brand that demands consistency is design and style. For example, Fuchs recommends sticking to one font and set of colors for all brand messaging and marketing. She encourages women to tap into their personal style and even home decor for inspiration. A strong, distinct voice also helps reinforce the brand.

“What is your vibe, personal style, and swag?” Fuchs said. “Include your personality.

Use your voice.”

Johnson designed her blog by evaluating what a curious cook would seek. Functionality drives the aesthetic, with minimal text and photos so readers can get right to the important part—the recipe. A close friend of Johnson’s created her logo: the ‘l’ in fettle loops playfully into a fork shape, inviting readers to dig into her world, where ingredient restrictions are nothing but a springboard for creativity.

Isabelle Wattenberg is a social media and data analytics specialist for MSP Communications. She spends her spare moments listening to opera, reading Alice in Wonderland, and writing about Minnesota happenings.

Exercises for Building your Brand: (From Melissa McKenzie of Triple M Studio Design)

• To find your brand colors, make a Pinterest board with pins that inspire you. Take a step back and look at the images together.

Identify the colors that link the photos together and use those colors for your brand materials.

• Stick to one font.

• Find a tagline that reflects your business and your style.

• Choose a simple, clear logo.

Inspirational Women with Strong Brands • Mallory Fuchs’s personal brand inspiration: Joanna Gaines • Stephani Johnson’s personal brand inspiration: Annie D’Souza of the Midwestival More info: Find Stephani Johnson’s blog at beinfinefettle.com

Girls Rock:

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Speaker: Lori Syverson

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soothe soul De-cluttering our space to our

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By Nancy Iglesias

“The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.”

- Hans Hoffman (a German-born American abstract expressionist painter)

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ithin the span of less than a year, I helped my siblings clean out my parents’ life-long home of more than 60 years of marriage (in order to help our parents move into an assisted living facility), as well as sort and pack our own five-bedroom home of 20-plus years in preparation for putting our home on the market, moving halfway across the country and downsizing into a threebedroom townhouse. Many friends came to help me sort and pack and prepare for a garage sale. Countless carloads of “stuff” were delivered to local thrift stores.

Prior to this sudden season of life, I was about as far from being a minimalist as one could get. I don’t consider myself to be a pack-rat or a super-consumer who

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just needs and acquires more stuff, but when I actually had to sort through my things, some interesting themes surfaced.

While I was never a great scrap-booker, I had years of photos and memorabilia just waiting for the right time I could organize it into beautiful, sentimental albums. As I sorted through my kitchen, I came to realize that somewhere along the line, I had become a hoarder of kitchen appliances.

Does anyone really need six mini Pampered Chef spatulas or four (ok, maybe five) melon ballers? How about two different kinds of cherry pitters? Let’s not even talk about how many sets of dishes and china I had tucked away. I rationalized that by saying that my mom was a “dish person,” and I guess I inherited those particular genes. I love entertaining and found creative joy in working in my kitchen, but my drawers and cupboards were bulging at the seams and, honestly, there were times when I found it difficult to find even one of my melon ballers.

(i.e., clutter) that had at one point flanked the desk. Less truly is more.

Something happened in the process of letting go of our stuff. It’s a bit like taking time to clear your calendar to make room for something truly important. Many people writing on this subject use phrases like it felt good to “lighten up,” or, “decluttering my home felt a bit like unclogging a drain.” The act of clearing away the unnecessary seems to open up space in our minds and souls for a more restful way of thinking.

There are a gazillion lists and videos out there about the decluttering process. Google will take you to 15 ways to declutter your home, or 30 days to a more simplified lifestyle. As I read a number of them this week and looked around my house (we have been in our new space for about two and a half years), I realized I need to once again re-set my uncluttered lifestyle.

Nancy Iglesias is a freelance writer and non-profit consultant. She spent 20 years working as an Executive Director for Habitat for Humanity in Winona, MN. Prior to that, she was the Marketing Manager for InterVarsity Press in Downers Grove, IL. Nancy enjoys entertaining, water fitness and teaching preschoolers at her church.

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During my days of sorting and packing, I thought long and hard about what I wanted our new space to be like. As I continued the purging process in preparation for our move, I thought more and more about what I wanted our new home to look like and - perhaps even more importantly - feel like. There was something very powerful about decluttering and coming up with less complicated spaces. There was actually something quite freeing about getting rid of enough things to actually create order in my personal spaces.

My mom was a quilter. She had bins full of fabric and other sewing supplies. When she could no longer utilize all that fabric, we found joy in delivering it to another quilter and friend of hers who I knew would tuck pieces and scraps of my mom’s fabric into one of her next creations.

My mom was also a great collector, of many types of items. She had a doll collection, she loved costume jewelry that brought a little “bling” to her life. She had inherited my paternal grandfather’s antique mustache cup collection. She went on to gather her own collection of tea cups. None of my siblings, nor their children, wanted any of those collections, but we each took a teacup and a doll and a special piece of jewelry. Other parts of the collections were given to nieces and nephews, cousins and siblings.

My mom was great about taking away the guilt of finding a meaningful place for each of the things in their home. Because I knew we were moving into a much smaller place, I couldn’t let my own sentimentality take over. I did keep the tea cups my mom purchased when we went to Romania to adopt our now-20-something son. My dad had a red Pendleton wool jacket he wore every Christmas. I kept it, thinking that I might make Christmas pillows out of it. Somehow, I haven’t quite had the nerve to cut it up. But it serves as a daily reminder, when I walk into my closet, of all the things I loved about my dad. I have some very special pieces with wonderful memories, but at the end of the day, we just had to let some things go and not feel guilty.

When it came time to clean out my home, I came to appreciate the joy that came from getting rid of things that at one time had meaning or purpose, but no longer did. For example, a sewing machine that I used to create a little line of soft dolls while my husband was in grad school, but had not been used in years, was given to a little 10-yearold girl who was just learning to sew. A large wall clock that had lost its appeal to me found a new home in a young couple’s first apartment.

There were some things I couldn’t throw out, so as the days drew closer to moving day and my emotions were not quite as rational as when the process began, several sweet friends took them and promised to find meaningful places for them. They might have been given away or might have found the nearest dumpster - but that was OK. They were gone!

Webster defines clutter as a transitive verb: to fill or cover with scattered or disordered things that impede movement or reduce effectiveness. While it’s true that the stack (or two, or three) of books next to our bed or sofa end table might physically impede movement or the mountain of unfiled paper in our office might reduce effectiveness, there is indeed another dimension to unclogging the clutter around your home.

My first job out of grad school was at a book publishing company in suburban Chicago. The woman who designed our book covers taught me a few things about design, but also some transferrable life principles. She talked about the power of white space on a page.

Certain design elements on a book cover were made stronger by strategically placed white space.

I found this to be true as more bags and boxes of unnecessary stuff went out the front door of our home. The antique desk in the corner of my living room seemed more striking without the “precious items”

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By Sarah Osterbauer

ub-zero temperatures make it difficult to picture green grass and leafy trees. But regardless of the infamous Groundhog’s predictions, spring will be here sooner than later. It’s never too early to start planning your garden.

What most people don’t know is how many options there are when it comes to garden styles.

From front yards to rain gardens and beyond, we have enlisted the assistance of two local garden professionals to educate us and offer tips on execution. Johanna George is a landscape designer at Drummer’s Garden Center and Floral in Mankato, and Nick Poehler is part-owner of Turtle Creek Nursery and Landscaping in Owatonna.

Front Yard Gardens The appearance of your front yard can increase (or decrease, if not done right) the curb appeal of your home. A winding walkway lined with perennials, a stately tree or even some well-trimmed shrubs around the front door can make a huge difference. Things to consider when planning your front yard look are where the sun is, the shape and location of your walkway, and the location of your front door.

Better Homes and Gardens recommends keeping your front door the focal point of your design. By limiting types of plants to 5 to 10 different types, your yard will look cohesive and orderly.

Poehler suggests considering the view not only from outside your home, but from inside looking out. Are you looking for privacy? Or a peaceful view to greet you each morning? He also suggests choosing plants that winter well, so as not to lose the look to snow and ice.

George recommends checking into your city regulations, as many

have specific rules for what can and cannot be displayed.

For example, gazebos are restricted from front yards in Mankato.

Rain Gardens A rain garden is an environmentally conscious way to keep your lawn and surrounding community healthy. Creating a bowlshaped area that catches runoff and planting there to catch rain water helps to filter the water of pollutants before it ends up in local waterways. Many state and local governments plant rain gardens in public parks to help the ecosystem flourish.

According to This Old House, rain gardens generally have three zones. In the center zone (the deepest section of the bowl shape), you should plant something that likes or can tolerate standing water for long amounts of time. The second zone should have plants that can tolerate occasional standing water. The zone should have plants that CONTINUES ON PAGE 22 u u u

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CONTINUED FROM page 21 can stand long periods of drought/drier conditions. Typically people choose to plant native greenery (grass and trees) in rain gardens, but they can be planted to look as beautiful as a traditional flower garden.

Poehler warns to make sure plants are not overcrowded in rain gardens. People tend to think more is better to soak up the water, but this actually can do damage by taking too much water, killing other nearby plant life.

English Gardens What makes a garden English, you ask? According to George, there are two ways to accomplish an this style of garden. One way is to use formal structural pieces, both green goods or stone elements such as walkways. The other style is “a free-flowing wispy, mass-planting style garden [for example] where wispy baby’s breath ties into massive cone flowers or daisies.” Another defining characteristic of English gardens are the colors. George says they typically have “very soft tones, whites, purples, soft pinks, very pastel-ish usually.” Poehler finds that these style gardens are popular with people who own older homes, who want to preserve the classic look. Even though traditional English plants do not grow well in Minnesota weather, there are plenty of other options that can achieve the desired appearance.

Cutting Gardens A cutting garden is used primarily for cutting flowers and greens to be used in arrangements and decor. According to George, these types of gardens generally use flowers and plants that grow two or three feet in height with sturdy stems. You can grow perennials or annuals in these types of gardens; both types have advantages. Perennials bloom

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each year without needing to be replanted. But annuals “produce and produce (flowers),” making them an asset in a cutting garden. Poehler suggests considering the size, shape, color and texture of the plant or flowers you want in a cutting garden, choosing things that work well together and that bloom often.

Bees and Birds The declining bee population is much talked-about and welldocumented. Bees are necessary to pollination, a step in the growing process which helps sustenance to thrive. George recommends that if you’re growing fruit and/ vegetables, you will want some flowers around your garden to attract bees to pollinate the crop. Bees as well as birds are attracted to flowers and plants based on color, shape and smell. Bees typically like white, yellow or purple flowers, but shape and scent also have to be attractive. To encourage return visits, Poehler suggests picking flowers that bloom often such as rudbeckia (aka Black-Eyed Susans). George advises choosing bright colors and long tubular-shaped flowers to attract hummingbirds.

Regardless of style, there are universal factors to consider when planning. Poehler advises to take your lifestyle into account. Do you have pets? Or small children? What does your budget look like?

All of these should be considered before choosing a type of garden or plant. Also think about how much time and effort you want to spend on initial planting and upkeep. George pointed out a common misconception about gardens is that they require a lot of work to maintain. Depending on what you grow, a garden can survive on minimal maintenance. Some perennials only require a once-a-year cleanup to be successful.

Sarah Osterbauer is a freelance writer based in St. Paul.

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The Design Element 1711 Premier Drive Mankato, MN 507.345.8708

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Taylor

well-planned space can completely change the function of your home. Space planning is all about maximizing function and beauty while utilizing the full potential of your home. There are many things to consider, whether you’re thinking about the flow of the floor plan or the arrangement of your furniture. The following are tips and tricks to correctly space plan in your home:

these as parameters for furniture arrangements so your home can flow seamlessly from one space to another. Create walkways by pulling your furniture away from the walls. There is always a tendency to push sofas up against a wall. This can often cause issues with walking paths.

1. Function First

3. Focal Point

Function is the most important part of space planning. Think about how you use each space.

If you are building a new home, consider what you’ve had in the past; what you liked and what you did not like. Take those points to customize your floor plan into something that will function for you. If you’re simply looking to spruce up your current home, think about what it is that you are not happy with. If you feel like the space is just too cluttered, consider a simple change such as swapping out two end tables for a coffee or sofa table. Simple changes in furniture choices can make a large impact.

Create a focal point. In your family room this might be the fireplace. Next, locate the outlets in the room. It is a simple detail that is often overlooked, but is very important. Maybe you want to use a sofa table and place a lamp on it, but the nearest outlet is on a surrounding wall.

There are other factors that might play into the furniture arrangement such as, ceiling lines, windows, and Feng Shu. Whatever it might be, consider all of these points before you rearrange your furniture. Pull your furniture items together using a rug. A rug can create a “space within a space.” For example, if you have one large great room and you aren’t sure how to separate your living space from the dining room, use a rug. This can create the illusion of separate rooms.

2. Walk This Way Locate all of your walkways or paths. You should not have furniture impeding your main walkways. Identify where the doors are located and how far they will swing into the room. Use

Taylor is an interior designer at The Design Element in the Mankato Design Center. She can assist with your design projects from planning to final product selections.

4. Help!

We have established the key points for consideration when thinking about space planning, whether it is a new construction or an existing home, but you still might need a little help. Contact a local Design company that has professional Interior Designers who can help you put arrangements together using their expertise along with the points listed above. A designer can walk through your home with you and pin point the issues you are having and exactly how to address them. As designers, we can assist you in selecting the right furniture for your space and help you arrange it accordingly. Maybe you want to build a new home and a functional floor plan is most important to you. We can help you from start to finish.

Correct space planning is a simple way to change the functionality of your home. You can hire an expert to help with the process or you can use the points above to give it a shot yourself. Either way, have fun with it. A little change can go a long way.

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Sell Your Home Fast:

21 Staging Tips

Set the scene for a successful sale by home staging

S

(Information from Houzz.com) uccessful staging is key to selling your home quickly and at the best price.

From cleaning to styling, these tips can help.

If you are planning to put your house on the market this summer, it goes without saying that you are hoping to sell your home as quickly as possible and get your asking price. Set the stage for success with these 21 tips for styling and upgrading your home, and see results — fast.

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Boost curb appeal.

This is something you always hear, and with very good reason. Many people thinking of touring your home will do a quick drive-by first, often deciding on the spot if it is even worth a look inside. Make sure your home is ready to lure in onlookers with these tips:

• Power wash siding and walkways • Hang easy-to-read house numbers • Plant blooming flowers and fresh greenery • Mow lawn, and reseed or add fresh sod as needed • Wash front windows • Repaint or stain the porch floor as needed

2

Welcome visitors with an inviting porch. Even if you have only a tiny stoop, make it say “welcome home” with a clean doormat, potted plants in bloom and — if you have room — one or two pieces of neat porch furniture.

Keep your porch lights on in the evenings, in case potential buyers drive by. Illuminating the front walk with solar lights is a nice extra touch, especially if you will be showing the house during the evening.

3

Get your house sparkling clean. From shining floors and gleaming windows to clean counters and scrubbed grout, every surface should sparkle. This is the easiest (well,

maybe not easiest, but certainly the cheapest) way to help your home put its best foot forward.

You may want to hire pros to do some of the really tough stuff, especially if you have a large house. Don’t skimp — this step is key!

4

Clear away all clutter.

If you are serious about staging your home, all clutter must go, end of story. It’s not easy, and it may even require utilizing offsite storage (or a nice relative’s garage) temporarily, but it is well worth the trouble. Clean and clear surfaces, floors, cupboards and closets equal more space in the eyes of potential buyers, so purge anything unnecessary or unsightly.

But it’s my style! Guess what?

It may not be the style of those seeking to buy a house in your neighborhood. So even if you have an awesome vintage-chic look going on, rein it in for the sake of appealing to the most number of people. You can bring your personal style back into play in your new home.

5

Strike a balance between clean and lived-in. Yes, I know I just said to get rid of all your clutter (and you deserve a big pat on the back if you did it), but now it’s time to judiciously bring back a few elements that will really make your home appealing.

Think vases of cut flowers, a basket of fresh farmer’s market produce on the kitchen counter or a bowl of lemons beside the sink.

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Style your dining room table.

The dining room is often a blind spot in decorating the home. Between dinners, a large dining table can look bare and uninviting, so styling it up with visitors in mind can increase the appeal. An oversize arrangement can look too stiff and formal, so try lining up a series of smaller vessels down the center of the table instead.

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Take a good look at your floors. At the bare minimum, give all floors a thorough cleaning (and steam clean carpets), but consider having wood floors refinished if they are in poor shape. If you don’t want to invest in refinishing floors, the strategic placement of area rugs can go a long way.

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Rearrange your furniture. In the living room, symmetrical arrangements usually work well. Pull your furniture off the walls and use pairs (of sofas, chairs, lamps) to create an inviting conversation.

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Choose sophisticated neutral colors. Now is not the time to experiment with that “fun”looking lime green. But that doesn’t mean you need to go all white, either. Rich midtone neutrals like mocha and “greige” create a sophisticated backdrop that makes everything look more pulled together.

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Create a gender-neutral master bedroom. Appeal to everyone with a clean, tailored master bedroom, free of personal items and clutter. You can’t go wrong with clean, crisp linens, tasteful artwork and a blanket folded at the foot of the bed.

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Open those closets! Openhouse visitors will peek inside your closets.

Closet space can be a makeit-or-break-it selling point for buyers, so show yours off to their full advantage by giving excess stuff the heave-ho. Again, this is really important, so even if you need to store a few boxes elsewhere, it’s worth it. Aim to have 20 to 30 percent open space in each closet to give the impression of spaciousness.

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Clean up toys. Of course there will be families with children looking at your home, but just because they have kids too doesn’t mean seeing toys strewn everywhere will sell them on the place. When people are house hunting, they are imagining a fresh start. Show them that in this house, it is possible to have a beautifully organized kids’ room, and they might be swayed.

13

Use “extra” rooms wisely.

If you have been using a spare bedroom as a dumping ground for odd pieces of furniture and boxes of

junk, it’s time to clean up your act. Each room should have a clearly defined purpose, so think about what potential buyers might like to see here. An office? A guest room? Another kids’ room? Whether you buy inexpensive furnishings, rent them, or borrow some from friends, making a real room out of a junk room will have a big payoff.

14

Try a pedestal sink to maximize space.

If you have a small bathroom but a huge cabinet-style sink, consider swapping it out for a simple pedestal version. Your bathroom will appear instantly bigger.

15

Use only perfect personal accents.

Especially in the bathroom, it is important that anything left out for visitors to see is pristine.

If you have a gorgeous fluffy white bathrobe, hanging it on a decorative hook on the door can be an attractive accent —but if your robe is more of the nubby blue floral variety, you might want to hide it away. Look at every detail with a visitor’s eye — bars of soap should be fresh and clean, towels spotless, the garbage always emptied (you get the idea).

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Entice people to explore the whole house.

By placing something that draws the eye at the top of the stairs, in hallways or in corners, you can pique curiosity and keep potential buyers interested throughout a whole home tour.

A piece of artwork, a painted accent wall, a window seat, a vase of flowers, a hanging light or even a small, colorful rug can all work to draw the eye.

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Show how you can use awkward areas. If you have any room

beneath the stairs, or a nook or alcove anywhere in your home, try to find a unique way to show it off. By setting up a small work station, a home command center with a bulletin board, or built-in shelving, your awkward spot becomes another selling point.

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Beware pet odors. Really, this can be a big one! If you have pets, get all rugs steam cleaned and be extra vigilant about vacuuming and washing surfaces. Also be sure to keep any extra-loved pet toys and doggie bones hidden when tours are scheduled.

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Create a lifestyle people are looking for.

Generally speaking, you want to play up what your neighborhood or area is known for. Have a house in a quiet, grassy suburb? Hanging a hammock in your backyard and a bench swing on your porch could be the perfect touch.

20

Stage the outdoors too. Even if your condo has only a teensy postage stamp–size balcony, play it up with a cute café table and chairs, a cheerful tablecloth and even a little tray of dishes or a vase of flowers.

When people look at this scene, they won’t be thinking “small,” they will be thinking, “What a charming spot to have breakfast!”

21

Think seasonally.

Make sure your garden is in beautiful shape in the summer, and that any extra features you have, like a pool or a fire pit, are cleaned and ready to go. Take advantage of the cozy vibe of the season in autumn and winter, by building a fire in the fireplace and simmering hot apple cider on the stove.

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,

every day “The basis of etiquette is showing respect to others and helping them feel comfortable, as well as being comfortable yourself,” she said. “If you know what’s expected (in various situations), it’s easier to show respect for others, yourself and situations. Rules change, but the basis of respect doesn’t. It’s simply making others comfortable.” - Kim Purcell

Y

By Beth Forkner Moe

ou might not ever have the opportunity to attend lunch with the First Lady or have tea with the Queen of England, but wouldn’t it be nice to know what’s proper to do during the event before you go, so you don’t stumble through it and feel like a fool?

More than likely, though, you have or will be in situations involving potential employers where you may have felt a bit more comfortable having knowledge of the intricate dance it often takes to make yourself stand out from the crowd.

Or, you may have children you hope to someday – eventually - take to a restaurant that doesn’t involve a drive-through window (or even answer the phone in a manner that doesn’t make you sound like your entire family has never met other human beings).

This is where Kim Purscell, owner of Etiquette Matters, comes in.

Etiquette Matters, located in Owatonna, equips individuals and teams with contemporary social skills, confidence, and competitive advantage.

It’s not all about which plate to eat from, which spoon is used first, or which side the water glass should be placed on. It’s more than that – from communications with others, to respect for people from other cultures, to feeling more self-confident in how you carry yourself in school, in the workplace and in social and other settings.

Purscell, who grew up in Canada, spent her early career working for Air Canada. While working in London, she completed etiquette training through Protocol London in London, Ontario. It had a profound 26

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impact on her career at Air Canada, opening doors and enabling her to handle situations and opportunities with grace and poise.

“As part of developing my own brand and equipping myself with skills, I took some courses with a Canadian Ambassador’s wife,” she said. “She had lived in many countries, and after the Ambassador’s death, she wanted to share some of the rich experiences and skills she had learned.”

“This experience was so phenomenal and impactful for my career,” Purscell said. “I learned so many things from her and gained a lot of confidence because of this training. It had a big impact on opportunities that came my way after that.”

When Purscell got married and moved to Minnesota, she worked for several years with various local non-profit organizations, including Red Cross, the Southern Minnesota Initiative Foundation, Chamber of Commerce and United Way. “When our (now-grown) sons were graduating from high school, I held an etiquette dinner for them and their friends,” she said. “As (young adults) are going out into the professional world, they need to know how to behave and carry themselves. The boys loved it and said, ‘Mom, you need to do this for other people; they need to know this.’”

Purscell said her sons’ enthusiasm sparked her interest in sharing these lessons, so she began to investigate various courses and schools in order to receive credentials that would give her credibility in teaching classes to others.

Purscell graduated in fall 2017 with her teaching certification in Children’s Etiquette through the American School of Protocol in Atlanta, GA. This certification allows her to teach children in grades K through 12 with age-appropriate development of soft skills. “Since 85% of hiring decisions are made based on soft skills, this training sets

children up for success from an early age,” she said. She also received a teaching certification in corporate etiquette from the American School of Protocol in February, and will graduate with teaching certification in International Protocol from the Washington (D.C.) School of Protocol this summer.

All of these certifications will allow her – with credentials – to teach etiquette and business protocol to people of all ages.

Her first classes were focused on young children. “If you’re going to start and make faux pas, do it in front of children. They won’t know any better,” she said with a smile. “It’s fun to watch children walk into class, even though they don’t want to be there and are only there because their mom signed them up.”

“By the end of the week, though, they are beaming with confidence and are standing tall, because people invested in them and believed in them,” she said.

She has now began working with people a bit older, including teaching some classes at Shattuck-St. Mary’s and for members’ families at Rochester’s Golf and Country Club.

She’s also, as she put it, starting to tinker with more light-hearted social etiquette events, such as royal teas, saying the newest upcoming royal wedding is sparking interest in such activities. She also enjoys serving afternoon and garden teas.

Purscell’s newest venture, one that she is hoping to expand throughout southeast Minnesota, is working with young adults, from college students learning about “fundamental business relationships, international communication, and networking skills,” to corporate etiquette (from “business etiquette, civility, cultural awareness, distinquished dining, and being prepared to win in the modern-day global marketplace”), to modern business and professional etiquette for young and emerging professionals. Finally, she said, she is hoping to start work-

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ing with employees in companies, so team members are comfortable in all aspects of working with customers and potential customers, as well as other team members.

One thing Purscell has learned along the way is that different cultures have different norms, and it’s difficult to make other people feel comfortable without knowing the norms. “As we have more of an international business community, I want to be able to teach people how to show respect to people arriving here (to do business),” she said. “It’s not to change the American way of doing business, but being respectful of other cultures.”

“The basis of etiquette is showing respect to others and helping them feel comfortable, as well as being comfortable yourself,” she said. “If you know what’s expected (in various situations), it’s easier to show respect for others, yourself and situations. Rules change, but the basis of respect doesn’t. It’s simply making others comfortable.”

Currently, Purscell said, her business is very much in the start-up mode, but she is working with various organizations (including businesses, women’s groups and educational institutions). She said a lot of women, employers and educators know how important these topics are.

“People make decisions about you in the first three to five seconds they encounter you – what you look like, how you carry yourself, what you say,” she said. “It’s important to put your best foot forward. I’m hoping I can work with more corporate clientele and young professionals. Three to five seconds – it’s frightening to realize you can blow it before you even know it.”

Right now, she said, there is a lot of interest in children’s birthday parties and “Princess School,” and she very much enjoys working with CONTINUES ON PAGE 28 u u u

SHOP WITH US FOR YOUR FAVORITE SPRING LOOK! 506 Division St. S. Downtown Northfield 507-366-6786

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CONTINUED FROM page 27

“How can you hold it in when you’re so excited about a topic?” she asked. “I really think of myself as an ‘Etiquette Evangelist.’”

children. Her passion is working with people going into the work world, though.

“Their parents may or may not have taught them etiquette. If people don’t know this, they put themselves at a disadvantage,” she said. “I want to pass this onto the next generation, and I want to share this gift with the next generation. That’s how I looked at my training, as a gift.”

Current courses offered: The Art of Etiquette for Children, Youth and Teens • Grades 1-5 (table manners and dining skills, socialization skills, respect for self and others • Grades 6-9 (effective communication, table manners, personal fashion, socialization, etc.) – boys’ and girls’ classes are held separately at this age • Teens in Grades 10-12 (promoting knowledgeable, courteous, and considerate behavior toward others; increase confidence in ability to handle demanding situations; appearance, poise and confidence; dating etiquette) • Prom Etiquette

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For more information: Kim Purscell can be reached at: 507.363.1634 Kim@EtiquetteMatters.us www.EtiquetteMatters.us Facebook: Etiquette Matters

Etiquette for the Family (table manners, dining skills, creating dinner conversation, being a gracious host or guest) Wedding Party Etiquette Afternoon Etiquette Tea (education and enjoyable blend of history, rules and tasty treats) University and Student Etiquette – Training Tomorrow’s Global Leaders • Job Interviewing and Business Networking • University Dining Etiquette Tutorial Corporate Etiquette • Adult Etiquette Benefits Seminars • Power, Presence and Style • Modern Business Etiquette • Professional Networking Etiquette

Deeper Dive Etiquette Classes • Dining Etiquette Lunch and Learn Workshops • First Impressions • Business Etiquette 101 • Impression Management: Your Upiurusiness Wardrobe • Networking 101: How to Make an Entrance and Work the Room • The Art of Small Talk and Making Polite Conversations • Professional Business Decorum and Meeting Manners: On-Site and Virtual

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PROFILE

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Model on the runway An international, yet internal, adventure in personal style

B

By Beth Forkner Moe

y all accounts, Meghan Rook could be considered a success.

Not only is she intelligent (receiving a degree from the University of Minnesota), but she is undeniably beautiful (achieving international acclaim as a model throughout Asia and Europe). But at what cost – to her body, her self-esteem, her sense of self?

We visited with Rook and talked – frankly – about her career choices to date, what they have taught her, and where she wants to go from here to do with her life going forward. Following our interview, we have added some of her blog entries, www.modelontherunaway.com.

Rook spent her childhood years in Wake Forest, N.C., and moved to Minnesota right before high school. She attended New Prague High School and chose to go to the University of Minnesota. She majored in retail merchandising with an apparel emphasis, with a minor in management.

Like many young people, the first year adapting to change was difficult, Rook said. She said she overate, drank too much, fell in love and was disappointed in love. In the aftermath, she said, she developed an eating disorder, or, as she called it, “My friend ED.” From her journey as college student to struggling with an eating disorder to becoming an international model to coming back home to Minnesota, she shared her voyage with us. (Editor’s Note: Rook’s mother, Suzanne, is Regional Managing Editor of the Faribault Daily News, Northfield News, Lonsdale Area News-Review and Kenyon Leader.)

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CONTINUED FROM page 31 GF: How much of your journey with ED do you want to discuss?

Or is that simply a (big) part of your overall journey? That’s the first couple parts of your blog we read about.

MR: ED definitely guided many of my decisions and my desire for control for much of my adult years….. but I think in the past year, I ‘ve experienced things that are deeper than that and forced me to realized that my values were out of whack….I think being in your 20’s and feeling confused and walking down a path that hasn’t necessarily been paved (is important).

GF: How did you become involved with modeling? Is it something you had always considered?

MR: I started modeling part-time while in college, but never intended on becoming a full-time model after college (I actually kind of laughed at the idea), but I was “scouted” during college while I was in a fashion show for the apparel design majors.

GF: So, what piqued your interest in full-time modeling?

MR: After I studied abroad in Florence, Italy, my senior year I developed a curiosity and desire to see the world…..After college, I worked as a merchandiser at a home shopping network called EVINE for about six months, and then quit in January 2015 to start full-time modeling.

Modeling started becoming a vehicle for travel.

GF: How did you get to the “big time?” What did that involve?

MR: I had to get my agency to keep pushing me for contracts in Asia, which is where most models get their start. They send Polaroids (generally wearing no makeup) and your full book (portfolio) and makeup. I didn’t have much experience at this point so it took awhile to get that first contract. Once you build your book, you can try for Europe, New York City or Los Angeles.

GF: Where have you spent your time modeling?

MR: Three-month contracts are the norm. I spent (that amount of time) in Singapore, Jakarta, Bangkok and Milan, with about four months each year at home (in Minnesota). I spent more time last year in India.

GF: How did you get modeling contracts?

MR: The contracts are with an agency, which is like a manager who sends you on castings and gets you work. You can work with many clients on that contract.

GF: What types of modeling do you do? Runway? Still? Fashion?

Product? Video/commercials?

MR: All of the above, plus showroom, promotional, etc.

GF: What’s your favorite part of the job? What’s your least favorite?

MR: I love the creative freedom it gives me. I get to meet so many interesting people in the industry. On top of that, I have flexibility in my work. It’s not a typical 9-5 job. Granted, sometimes I have 12-16 hour days, but I always look back and remember it as a positive experience.

My least favorite part of the job is that I feel like often I’m not taken seriously. Models in every country are stereotyped. Often, people will meet me and act shocked once they start talking to me – when they find out I can speak English and hold a conversation and don’t take myself seriously.

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GF: How long do you see yourself doing this?

And what do you think might come next?

MR: I’m actually done with full-time modeling, but I will still model part-time, time permitting.

There is a large market in Minneapolis for commercial modeling (products, etc.).

As far as what comes next, that’s a great question!

I’m still figuring it all out. The problem with me is that I have so many interests, and I want to choose something that will maximize my potential. I think I want to continue freelance writing and part-time modeling, then continue taking career tests and talking with people to determine what the best career is.

I’m really interested in leadership and management, but I also need that creative aspect. I just don’t want to feel stuck in a career I hate, so I’m really trying to feel out my opportunities.

GF: Do you think you’ll stay in the States at this point, beyond occasional travel?

MR: For now, it’s looking like I’ll stay in (the Twin Cities area). I had opportunities to work “front-of-house” (in restaurants), but it’s really hard to do that on a tourist visa. And that just isn’t lucrative for when I decide to move back to the States….or anywhere else in the world.

GF: So, to clarify, you modeled full-time for about 3 years?

MR: Yes, and when I would come home I worked as a waitress for extra money. I would love to model for the rest of my life, but I think right now I really want to use the skills I gained abroad and start an actual career.

GF: Let’s touch on ED. It’s not what defines you, but it appears it was influential. Did you get treatment or counseling for it, or did you work through it on your own? Do you consider yourself past it, or more healthy but struggling, or something else?

MR: I did get counseling while I was in college.

Some friends mentioned to me that I was starting to look ridiculous and, of course, it was easy to notice my weird food tendencies. I’m past the super-restrictive mindset but I still have eating disordered tendencies. Seeing that I’ve gained weight is really hard. If I eat too much I feel guilty. Seeing other models who are super skinny can trigger disordered thoughts.

GF: What do you mean by “eating disordered tendencies?”

MR: I count the calories in all of the foods I eat.

It’s a subconscious thing by now, though. Or I’ll use these weird diets as excuses to not eat something. It’s a control mechanism.

GF: You’ve talked with us about experiencing some deep thoughts that you have experienced in the past year that made you believe some of your values needed to change. What are some examples?

MR: For example, I was in a relationship with an Indian man. Like most relationships, you realize a lot of things about yourself, especially in a cross-cultural relationship. When we broke up….. I questioned a lot of things about the relationship, about myself. I asked myself “why?” all the time. I had some very honest self-talk, and I’m still doing it. Now when I find myself thinking a certain way or acting a certain way, I question it and I’m usually able to come up with an honest response, instead of hiding behind some façade.

Also, being in India made me question myself.

“Why am I here, of all places? Do I like it, or do I like how it pushes me outside of my comfort zone?

GF: So, you’ve pushed the comfort zone, realized how far you could actually go, and now are content to look at next steps?

MR: I am content to look at the next steps. Of course I would love to keep traveling, but I think after experiencing so much freedom it’s time to narrow the alternatives and focus on one thing.

GF: What would you like to tell your younger self?

MR: Trust in yourself. Have confidence that things will work out, and be patient because good things take time. All of the things I stressed over as a kid/teen are laughable now.

GF: What would you like to tell other young (or not-so-young) women?

MR: To travel while they’re young, and use that to question their values and ask, “Is this something I actually value, or do I value it because my friends, family or society are telling me to?” Millennials have changed the game in the sense that we’re not settling down as young as our parents were. We are changing careers, moving internationally, figuring ourselves out. It’s not always the most straight-forward path, but I’ve found it so much more rewarding.

GF: Anything else you’d like to add?

MR: That’s about the gist. But, also, use your painful experiences to grow. Many of us think we are entitled to never feel pain, and we chase high after high to try to end that pain instead of learning from it.

Excerpts from Meghan Rook’s Blog – Model on the Runaway September 11, 2017 The Battle Against ED: Part I “And I said to my body. Softly. ‘I want to be your friend.’ It took a long breath. And replied, ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.”

As a child, I had always been under my parents’ watchful eye and care. College was a different story.

I quickly became a party girl, surrounded by bottles of flavored Smirnoff and shots of UV Blue. I fell into a bad relationship He became unimpressed by my party girl ways, and swiftly broke it off. I was devastated.

However, I chose to drag it out, letting myself be emotionally abused by the rise and fall of his disinterest.

I became depressed; in turn I would eat, cry, and wake up in the morning hating myself for being so attached to this emotionless creature. My pants began to feel tighter, though I couldn’t understand why. It never occurred to me how late night McDonald’s and binge drinking could possibly spur the “Freshman 15 (pounds).”

One morning I woke up in the hospital. Blacked out the night before, couldn’t remember what got me there. Mortified doesn’t even begin to describe my world on that morning.

I was so disgusted with myself, and my body, I vowed to make a change.

The next summer I went home, joined a gym, and set to work researching ways to lose weight. The Internet was full of tips. I was engrossed in them. I spent hours each day looking up the best ways to burn fat, lowcalorie breakfasts, meal supplements, how to make yourself feel full, etc.

The Internet just begged to help me.

I quickly became addicted to counting calories - a numbers game.

The logic was simple: calories, bad.

Exercise, good. I logged every single calorie, down to the last pretzel, never going over my allotted 1,200. I ate the same thing every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner – but some days I got so hungry that I would cave, ripping open my 140-calorie Kashi bar that had been preapproved by ED (Eating Disorder). As my own punishment, I would cut 200 calories from dinner.

I never thought this was wrong, because I was getting information from reputable sources, and I was still eating enough to survive. I wasn’t one of “those girls” who would eat 200 CONTINUES ON PAGE 34 u u u

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CONTINUED FROM page 35 Bangkok was one of them. I idolized her body, her raw vegan diet. I was an absolute whale compared to her.

But she was 53 kilos. And I was barely hitting 50.

My body dysmorphia was completely out of control.

When I reached India, my waist had whittled its way to 23.5 inches. But India was not pleased. The market was full of girls with curves, in all shapes and sizes. Iwas a lanky American model with a flat butt. So I left and went to Milan – if anywhere skinny stood a chance, it was there.

But there, I was anything but skinny. The market was completely saturated with lanksters and 14-year-old Russians who had yet to hit puberty. I had met my match. And I (mostly) stopped letting it bother me. When in Rome, they say.

This is how the story ends: I came back to India.

I was no longer the skinniest model in the room.

Just over a month ago, during fashion week in India I came face-to-face with that reality. I was chosen to walk for more than 12 shows and presentations, a fact I was initially ecstatic about.

For each fitting they lined up all of us, like cattle, eyeballing and making comments about our figures.

Loudly.

“Let’s give this crop top to someone with a flat belly…”

“Her hips are way too wide for that dress.”

“Switch those pants with *insert name here.* Her thighs are skinny.”

At every fitting I looked around – comparing my thighs, hips, waist, arms – cursing my lack of selfcontrol. Cursing my ovaries - after five years without a period, my body has finally begun to work properly again. But all I felt was an identity crisis.

I know in my head I’m not there yet. I’m not recovered.

The majority of my days are spent avoiding elevator mirrors, wondering why my pants aren’t looser, absently reading nutrition labels on foods.

I still subconsciously run my hand along my stomach after I’ve finished a big meal. I still stand with my feet together, checking to see if my thigh gap has closed yet. I judge the size of my arms in pictures. Old habits die hard.

And while I am no longer the skinniest model in the room, I am healthy.

I know I should be happy about that. But disordered thinking allows you to be irrational. In fact, it feeds on it.

I have a long way to go toward recovery. There is no ending to my story…as of yet. I’m still fighting, every single day, to come to terms with my

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body. I know I should accept it, as a vehicle that needs fuel and energy to keep moving. It needs whole foods, healthy habits; it needs an owner that is kind and treats it with respect. I don’t always do that.

I want people to understand that eating disorders do not always start with a desire to be skinny.

They are much deeper than that.

I think the key to getting over any mental illness is by recognizing and admitting you have a problem. It’s not a solution, but it’s a step.

December 6, 2017 Lost, But Learning To Love It’s been a long, confusing time, and I stopped writing. The thing with blogging is that you must

be vulnerable and open to criticism. The irony is that the best writing often comes when you’re feeling your lowest. That’s because it – like any art form – opens you up to your own emotions.

But my emotions were exactly what I had been trying to run from.

I’ve always been an emotional person, trying persistently to escape the reality of her own thoughts. I’ve always held onto things that weren’t necessarily good for me, always been reluctant for change.

Even when I knew change would make me happy.

Because in the beginning it never does.

But his year I did make a change, a kind of crazy one.

In February 2017, I moved to India.

Saying it now sounds so strange, since my reasons for moving have now turned into my reasons for wanting to leave.

Before leaving I had many doubts, many concerns; coming from friends, family, total strangers…I brushed these away. I thought I was just “misunderstood.”

That was my self-induced label – Misunderstood. Giving myself a label made everything easier to process.

But I didn’t want to be misunderstood. Eventually I began to crave a safe space where I could lower my defenses and be affectionate. I was tired of feeling lonely. I wanted someone whom I could share my emotions with and feel like I wasn’t, I don’t know, crazy.

On my first trip to Mumbai I found that certain “someone” and latched on. I left. I came back. I latched on even harder.

What was actually crazy is that I still felt misunderstood.

And I still continued to hang on.

Relationships, for the less mature, are like an infinite journey to self-validation.

Chasing after someone who gives you attention in bursts.

Calling it love – but it’s just ego.

I have an ego. I need validation. I want to feel accepted and loved. I would never call myself emotionally mature. I’ve always carried a strong sense of self but confidence has always been a problem.

What I could not – and would not – admit, is that I didn’t love myself enough to know my self worth. That needed to be given to me by others. I searched for validation in all of my relationships.

How can you rely on others to give you credibility?

I knew I was being stupid, that I didn’t need anybody else telling me I was good enough.nI had already descended down the slippery slope, so caught up in my emotions and the swirling wind of opinions that encroach Mumbai.

There I was. Lost.

I had changed many things about myself and my lifestyle just to be with one person who I had begun to trust. Activities that once excited my soul, now left me feeling anxious – including writing.

“What do you do?” people would ask.

“I’m a model,” I responded, through gritted teeth.

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A Great Place for a Girlfriend Getaway

New Prague

N

ew Prague, located 45 miles southwest of the Twin Cities, is a bridge between the metro area and the rural part of the state. According to its website, its motto is “A Tradition of Progress.” The city of about 7,500 people was established in 1856 and has a rich history of Czech, Bavarian and Bohemian culture.

According to Debbie Kalousek, Executive Director of the Chamber of Commerce, the city is a great place to visit. “We have a great selection of specialty shops downtown, including boutiques, antiques, florists, clothing, jewelry, almost anything,” she said. “We also have nice walking paths, beautiful parks, and a downtown winery with a really cool vibe.”

Kalousek said that a group of stores and restaurants on and around Main Street work together to promote the community and each other. Shops on Main often holds events for people to come together and have the opportunity to do things. One such event, Sister Saturday, was held in mid-February.

Activities included brunch, shopping and prizes.

Cheryl Skluzacek, owner of Mosaic on Main, said Shops on Main holds events throughout the year, including Crazy Days in the summer, Ladies’ Night out in the October, Deer Hunters’ weekend and Small business Saturday in November, and more. Check out their Facebook page – New Prague Shops on Main – to find out more. The group of participating stores, and the events held, can be found on the page.

“We work together as a group and try to promote all our businesses as much as we can,” Skluzacek said.

Some of the city’s main community events include: Run New Prague (halfmarathon, 10K, 5K, and kids’ fun run) on May 5; Czech Out New Prague, a business and community event showcasing what New Prague has to offer, on August 2; and the Dozinky Festival and Classic Car Cruise (a Czech Harvest Festival patterned after the “Old Country” original, celebrated annually in the Czech Republic to give thanks for the bountiful harvest), on September 22.

“There’s a wide variety of things to do,” Kalousek said. “There’s always something going on. New Prague is just a really nice smaller town.”

“We are a great little destination town,” Skluzacek said.

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THE COACH’S CORNER

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MalloryFUCHS Mallory Fuchs is a licensed alcohol and drug counselor and a life coach for women. She helps women gain the confidence they deserve so that they can design the life they love.

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Y

ou know that shirt you bought as a pick-me-up a month ago that is just hanging in your closet collecting dust?

What if I told you that I have an amazing secret that you will wear everyday and make you look and feel like a million bucks? Plus, it won’t break the bank or sit in that closet just to hang out for no one to see or admire.

It will make your hair shine, skin glow, eyes sparkle, and you light up a room. It will radiate and leave everyone you meet feeling inspired and loved. But, most importantly, you will feel inspired and loved!

People are going to wonder what your secret is and you already have it; you just have to grab hold

of it and buckle up for the journey.

Before we get into the secret, let’s take a little detour.

One day she was walking through the hallways and one of her co-workers hollered out, “You doing okay?” She responded, “Yep!” Even though deep down everything was a hot mess express and she was just trying to keep it together. He looked at her and said, “Are you sure? You just haven’t been yourself lately.”

He knew that things were a mess but thought she was doing a good job of not showing that on the outside. However, she was busted and forced to really take a look at herself after her co-worker called attention to what she so desperately thought she could hide. She went home that night and took a look in the mirror and didn’t even recognize herself. Her co-worker was right – you wear how you feel no matter how much you try to disguise it.

When she really started to dig deep down and acknowledge what was going on, she realized that she wasn’t taking care of herself. She lost the sparkle in her eye and her glow in her smile. She was missing that positive vibe about herself and no longer lit up the room she walked into. She stopped doing the things she once loved like reading, writing, and dancing. She started to give up and gave up on her adventurous and wild woman soul.

She allowed her toxic work environment and the labels of society to place her in a box and hide her true wild woman self. She allowed others to tame her free spirit, style, and swag.

But she decided one day that it was time for her to take her power back and find that wild woman again.

Are you ready for the secret? Here it is: Your style and swag is defined by WHO YOU ARE - because that is your signature and nobody else is you! Your style and swag are radiated by your own self-love and self-worth. Your swag is more than just the outfits you wear or the car you drive. It’s in how you carry yourself and the amount of love that you invest into yourself.

Your style is the lasting impression that you leave on others’ hearts and souls.

Your style and swag is about being true and genuine to your roots. It’s about taking that mask off and truly allowing others to see your soul. Because the truth is, people crave real and authentic relationships. Our style is the

message that we send to the world about who we are and what we stand for. What do you want to be known for? Because now is your time to be that woman.

Your style should have no boundaries or limits, and you are allowed to grow and change and be a wild woman at heart.

Ladies, it’s time we take our power back and be who we are destined to be! Quit allowing others and society to label you into someone or something you are not. You were not meant to be a cookie-cutter image darling - you are a designer and it’s time you treat yourself with the love and respect that you deserve.

Own it! Own all of it and have fun while doing it!

Self-love and confidence looks good on you girl, and you will never go out of style!

Self-love changed my life and it gave me more confidence, courage, motivation, and drive. It created healthier and positive relationships with those I loved. It helped me navigate through life’s choices and it certainly showed me who I needed to cut out of my life and the strength to do so. It gave me happiness and my very own style and swag.

So now you’re probably thinking to yourself… what is self-love and how do I get that?

Self-love and gaining confidence is definitely life-long journey and a beautiful and personal one at that.

I want to leave you with five simple steps to start your very own self-love journey today: 1.) Schedule time for yourself each and every day (even if it is only five minutes to yourself in the car listening to your favorite song).

2.) Take a leap of faith and try something new that you’ve been afraid to do. You will never grow if you stay in your comfort zone.

3.) Write a love letter to yourself and appreciate all that you are all of it.

4.) Remind yourself that it is okay to ask for help when you need it. You do not need to do it all.

5.) Self-love isn’t just bubble baths and pampering (even though that is fun and needed). It’s also about the hard stuff. It’s about learning to say no to others, setting healthy boundaries, forgiving ourselves and others, and cutting toxic people out of our life.

I just want to leave you with one last thing, girlfriend: BUY THE SHOES, EAT THE CAKE, TAKE THE TRIP, GET THE TATTOO, AND OWN WHO YOU ARE….

Because that is beautiful!

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By Nicole Sweeney (Originally published in the November 2017 issue of Southern Minn SCENE ) am very passionate about the sport of bodybuilding. To me, there is just something about the months of hard work – both in and out of season, the patience and resilience that is required throughout the course of a prep, and having the courage to step onto a stage and show every ounce of your hard work (in the world’s smallest bikini, lol).

On Sept. 30, I competed in the Natural Badger Classic, a show held by the North American Natural Bodybuilding Federation (NANBF). I was fortunate enough to take fifth place amongst a sea of beautiful and truly talented young women. For those of you that have no idea what a bodybuilding or fitness competition is – it’s essentially a beauty pageant for fitness people.

I’m not writing this story to talk about the time I spent on stage, but to draw light to the entire process of getting to the stage. Don’t get me wrong… the 60 seconds you get under the bright lights, in a sparkly bikini, sky-high heels and beautiful jewelry are AH-MA-ZING. But, I think pushing through a grueling workout - getting up well before the sun rises in order to squeeze in your cardio for the day - and eating 90 percent of all of your meals out of Tupperware spending a few hours cooking, weighing and divvying up your food each week – these special moments of pushing through something you didn’t think you could do… I think that this is what competitors really cherish. It helps you realize just how strong you can be…there can be so much strength and beauty found in the daily grind!

There are some very important things that you need to consider when choosing a show. What federation you wish to compete in, how far you are willing to travel, how much you are willing to spend, and what do you hope to bring to the stage? Someone who wishes to look

the part and compete as a female bodybuilder is going to have a much different path to get to the stage than another girl who wishes to compete in (the) bikini (category).

There are many factors in (the competitions)… picking the when and where – how are you going to get ready? - what will your workouts look like? - how much cardio will you do - what will you eat CONTINUES ON PAGE 42 u u u EARLY SPRING 2018

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Together, we embarked on a prep that was more than 25 weeks long. It began with a short bulking program, where we looked at my physique and pinpointed my “weaknesses” where I might have been unbalanced. Then we attacked them in order to add as much size as we could. My physique is considered to be top-heavy, which means that I have trouble gaining size in my legs. My upper body tends to look more muscular than my legs do. So, we went and trained my legs aggressively in hopes to eliminate this weakness while continuing to work my other muscle groups with just as much focus.

We also began the process of being aware of what I was eating to set a nutritional baseline that we could work off of moving forward.

I used Noel’s app to track every single thing I ate and drank, how much I moved and what I did in the gym. In the beginning, my prep consisted of a little bit of cardio, a lot of heavy lifting, and eating for performance and to fuel my body in order to grow. I won’t lie….you get to lift heavy things and eat quite a bit of food. But it doesn’t last too long.

Right around 16 weeks before I was to take the stage, we slowly started the process where you “cut.” In a nutshell, this is where you slowly decrease your caloric intake, and ramp up your weight-lifting intensity and volume, as well as your cardio. It is a careful and deliberate process of chipping away at your body until you can slowly start to see muscle shape, definition, vascularity and striation. How much of this you should see on stage depends on what category you compete in. Again, female bodybuilders look much different than bikini competitors do.

Cutting down.

CONTINUED FROM page 41 - how much do you get to eat, and when? There are so many different ways to go about it. This is why the majority of competitors bring in a coach to oversee their prep and to keep track of their progress.

I began my journey to stage with Noel Brue, of The Body Boutique, in March 2017. I met Noel at my very first competition in 2015, and was impressed by just about everything about her. The second she walked into the event venue I thought to myself, “Man, I would love to learn from her!”

I was young, nervous and completely clueless about what to expect at my very first show. Noel was calm, collected and confident and had brought the best physique to the stage. She was a role model at the time, someone I truly looked up to (and still do). She has become the most wonderful mentor and friend. From 2014 to late summer 2017, Noel has not only taken first place at our show in the Women’s Athletic category in 2015, but has earned more than just one Pro Card (meaning she is a professional in her sport), and placed second to the World Champion just last summer. I consider myself lucky to be coached by someone who is making such waves in the fitness industry.

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For the last few weeks of my prep, I was in the gym seven days a week – doing at least 45-60 minutes of cardio, anywhere between one to two hours of weight lifting, and practicing my posing (how I present myself on stage – this can be exhausting and is a workout all on its own). Although we ramped up to this over time so that it wasn’t such a shock to my body, I’m sure you can see that maintaining a schedule like this requires a LOT of dedication and commitment. Especially when you need to take into account that you need to be consuming some sort of small meal every 2-4 hours (as my coach recommended).

F Nutrition is a whole different part of a prep. Most people consider the diet to be the “hard” part. Everyone does it a bit differently, but I’ve found that most competitors follow a plan that requires them to eat very clean foods. For the majority of my prep I consumed lots of lean protein sources, green vegetables, some fruits, some complex carbohydrates and healthy fats. Because I have a lot of food allergies and intolerances, my list for acceptable foods that I could consume was pretty short. For the most part, it was green vegetables, lean turkey and chicken breast, white fish, egg whites, protein powder, sweet potato, whole oats, berries, avocado and nut butters (or whole nuts like almonds and cashews) - all very healthy foods. During the last four to six months, I had a weekly or bi-weekly “free/cheat” meal (or a cheat meal). But from 16 weeks to show day I had only a handful, and they were all carefully programmed by Noel. Other than these meals, I stayed right on track with my plan, and ate only the things that I was supposed to in order to fuel my body to look my best on stage.

Toward the end of your prep, you have to experiment and be very aware of how your body reacts to different foods. For instance, I noticed that I felt bloated or my stomach felt a little puffy if I had chicken breast or potato. So, these are things that I would not consume approaching my show day. Since you don’t want to look puffy or be uncomfortable on stage – you want to feel and look your best – you steer clear of those foods. There is no set guide for this process; everyone is different and everyone tends to react to foods differently. This just makes it that much more of an adventure, that much more fun.

This is the hardest part of this whole process. Many competitors go completely MIA as soon as a prep starts, and I completely understand that. It is nearly impossible to juggle work, gym, family and friends when you pick a show date and start a program.

Here’s a sneak peek into my schedule so you have somewhat of an idea of how overwhelming it can be: Monday-Friday I would get up and do my cardio 5:30-6:30 a.m., get ready and head to work 8:00 a.m.-5:00 p.m., then go to the gym after work about 6-8 p.m. I’d head home and pack up all my food, gym and work clothes for the following day, and do it all over again.

My weekends were usually reserved for longer workouts and meal prep for the next week.

I won’t even begin to lie – it is exhausting. And there are many side effects that make it even more difficult to keep trucking along every single day. These side effects can come with dieting down to be at a competition weight in hopes to place high and possibly bring home a trophy.

The diet.

Everyone is different. I have heard other people say they do not experience any of the things (I experienced), and others who say this is nothing and they have had far worse (experiences). My body responds to “cutting” just about the same every single time. My joints ache and are sore from all of the rigorous training. Often, my body fat percentage is so low that my hands and feet actually go a little bit numb for long periods of time throughout the day, or have a tingling sensation.

It becomes very difficult to fall and stay asleep, even though you are exhausted. It’s very hard to focus, and I also become the most forgetful person in the world. If you think about it, food is really fuel for your body. When you start restricting it significantly, it becomes harder for (your body) to do certain things.

CONTINUES ON PAGE 44 u u u

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my normal out-of-season weight. A month from my show, my body fat percentage was just under 10 percent, which is well below the average for women my age.

Now let me say that this is only a temporary part of the process. I do NOT maintain this year-round. It would not be healthy to do so. This is just one of the many reasons why I hire a coach – to monitor my progress and make sure I am not only continuing down a path to success, but to also make sure I am healthy and well along the way.

Noel is not there just for physical support, but she provided fantastic emotional support as well. While dieting down, being tired, in a pretty constant state of soreness and being so focused on your goals – it’s a mind game! Some days it feels like you’re going crazy. There were many days where I felt like I was making no progress at all, and Noel stepped in and reassured me and gave me an outsider’s perspective. I can now look back on all those progress pictures I sent her where I felt like I was “stuck” and laugh. Sometimes we just don’t give ourselves enough credit.

As you can see, it is a JOURNEY to get to that 60 seconds on stage.

It’s truly a mission of grinding through all the hard stuff to get there – but it is SO worth it.

So, there you have it…..a very broad overview of just ONE person’s experience getting to the stage. I LOVE talking about this, so if you have any questions at all please don’t hesitate to reach out to me!

Competition day.

CONTINUED FROM page 43 Throughout the course of a prep, most people can be expected to drop 10-15 pounds, maybe more. I dropped just over 12 pounds from

Nicole Sweeney is Projects and Engagement Coordinator for Northfield News, Faribault Daily News, Kenyon Leader and Lonsdale Area News-Review. She says, “My interest in fitness started as a multi-sport athlete who fell in love with encouraging pushing her teammates. As I grew up, I discovered a whole laundry list of food allergies and intolerances that I was forced to confront. This time of personal and physical growth opened my eyes to what a difference nutrition and fitness can make, together. From that point on my mission has always been to help people discover the same thing that I had discovered as a young girl.” She can be reached at www.sisufit.net (website), @sisufit (Instagram), @sisufitMN (Twitter), or Nicole Marie Sweeney or @ SisufitMN (Facebook).

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The Cat’s

W

By Grace Webb

hen Karen Wright first heard about a breed of cat that acts more like a dog, she was intrigued. When her research revealed how the Bombay cat is often used as a therapy animal for people with autism, she knew she had to find out for herself - and for her 13-yearold son, Grant, who was diagnosed with autism at a young age.

“They sounded like a perfect fit for my son,” she recalled. “They’re very people-oriented. They fetch.

They greet you at the door. They’re like heat-seeking missiles.”

Bombay breeders are few and far between, with only about a dozen listed on the Fanciers Breeder referral list. The closest breeder Wright could find was Troy Weier, who co-owns the Rokstarr Bombay cattery and operates out of Iowa. In late 2010, Weier came to the Twin Cities to participate at a local cat show, and Wright traveled up from Mankato with her husband, Jeff Pribble, and Grant to meet him.

“We took one of [Troy’s] Bombay cats out of the shelter, and Grant sat with this cat and held it for 45 minutes,” Wright said. “Grant has a lot of anxiety, [but] it was like all his anxieties melted away. It was amazing.”

Wright wrote a deposit check right there, but the family had to wait until spring 2011 to receive their kitten, Cleo (full name Yash Cleopatra Clover). Right away, Grant and Cleo became nearly inseparable.

“Grant absolutely loves her,” Wright said.

While Cleo isn’t technically a therapy cat (animals must go through a specific process to receive the official distinction), she is still invaluable to Grant and others learning about his autism. Wright said they bring Cleo to Grant’s class at the beginning of the school year as a way for him to help explain his autism to classmates.

“It helps the kids understand him better,” Wright said. “That’s a way he’s able to express himself to the kids, because there’s an animal there and they get it. It’s been a real blessing to have the cat there to help his classmates understand.”

A special history According to Weier, Bombays are such good people animals because of how their ancestors were raised. “[The Burmese] were temple cats, raised with monks and acting as their guardians,” he explained. “That became part of their DNA, almost—they developed an emotional IQ. If you’re sad or sick, they know it, and they’ll be right there to help you through that.”

Their fascinating copper eyes are also special, he added.

“Right above their eyes, there are pupilshaped shapes,” he said. “According to the legend, they were there to guard against evil spirits, so even if they were sleeping, they had two eyes open to the spirit world. They’re considered good luck.”

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CONTINUED FROM page 45 When Wright first purchased Cleo, she and her family figured that was the end of the story, especially since she had signed a contract agreeing to spay Cleo at six months of age. This is one way that breeders can help control the Bombay population and keep it safe from certain defects that sometimes appear without proper oversight, such as a recessive mutation known as the Burmese head defect. However, four days before Cleo’s scheduled appointment, Weier contacted Wright and asked if she’d consider using Cleo to breed more kittens. She said she’d have to ask her husband.

“I was sure he’d say no… but the next thing I know, he says, ‘Well, we could try it,’” she said. “I was utterly shocked.”

In order to make Cleo a competitive breeder, Wright began showing her at cat shows around the region, and the awards started to pile up.

Cleo has earned titles such as “Best Bombay in the Region” from the American Cat Fanciers Association and “Best Cat” from the International Cat Association (TICA), as well as becoming a triple Grand Champion through the same association. She’s also been on the cover of Cat

Fancy magazine, along with being that issue’s centerfold.

Then there are the more local awards. This year, Grant and Cleo earned Grand Champion at both the Nicollet County Fair and Minnesota State Fair through Grant’s 4-H group.

Wright said preparing for a cat show is a lot like preparing for a beauty pageant—including all the little tricks to make the cat look better on the big day.

“We have special black shampoo that makes their hair look deeper and shinier,” she said. “Then there’s a special grooming brush to get underlying hair out. There’s mink oil for the show [that we] work into their fur so it’s extra shiny. There’s even a special spray to use to make their hair extra fancy. You clean their ears, you clean their eyes… I’ve even taken a tweezers to pluck white hairs out of their coats. They’re used to it. For them, it’s just another day.”

Once Cleo established a winning pedigree for herself, Wright said, it was easy to find matches for her kittens, even with their $1,000 price tag. Working with Weier and another breeder out of St. Paul, she’s overseen three litters and 16 kittens in total. She provided Cleo,

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and the other breeders found a suitable tom to visit Wright’s house for about a week and “marry” Cleo, as her sons like to say. The kittens who have resulted from these brief “marriages” are spread across the country to homes in places like Alaska, Texas, New York and Washington D.C. “I vet [people] very carefully,” Wright said. “I want to know they’ve researched it, that it makes sense for their family. There are people we will turn down, like anybody who asks for a deal. If you don’t have the money to buy the cat, you won’t have the money to care for them. I did give some discounts because I’ve a son on the autism spectrum, and I saw what that cat did to help him with his struggles. You can really help benefit somebody just through this wonderful cat. It’s really neat to how they’ve affected their lives.”

Cleo contracted a uterine infection and is no longer able to breed, so she is now enjoying retirement as Grant’s full-time pet. Wright is working to prepare a second cat, Storm, to become her main breeder, though she says Storm is too young to breed yet.

Wright stresses the importance of careful breeding, urging people not to try their hand at “backyard breeding.” She and her fellow breeders test their cats to make sure they’re genetically pure and don’t carry any genetic defects. If a cat does have some sort of defect, Wright makes it into a pet instead of a breeder. She also makes sure not to do any inbreeding. Storm came from Texas and isn’t part of Cleo’s family tree.

It can also be quite pricey to breed cats. Wright remembered one time that eight kittens and two cats all picked up diarrhea from a cat show, resulting in more than $4,000 in vet fees.

“That was certainly not pleasant,” she said with a laugh. “We have since then decided no more [double] litters at a time.”

Kathleen Hwang Kim is one of Wright’s customers, buying a Bombay kitten, Teddy, for her 23-year-old daughter Emily. Emily was diagnosed with a form of cancer that stopped her development around the age of 12, and Hwang Kim purchased Teddy in 2013 after reading about Bombay cats’ playful, loyal personalities.

“He’s the best decision that we ever made,” she said. “He turned out to be an absolute God-send. He doesn’t respond to anybody like he does to my daughter… It’s incredible, CONTINUES ON PAGE 48 u u u

The Bombay The Bombay cat was developed

by Nikki Horner in 1965. Horner wanted to create a cat that looked like a “miniature black panther,” and succeeded after mixing sable Burmese cats with black American Shorthairs. The breed was officially recognized and registered by the Cat Fanciers’ Association in 1970 and the International Cat Association in 1979.

Bombay cats have muscular, medium-sized builds, weighing between six to twelve pounds.

They’re all black, and most famous for their bright copper eyes. They live approximately 1520 years if healthy.

“They’re the best-kept secret of cats,” said Troy Weier, who has bred the cats for about 12 years and now works with Wright. “They’re lap fungus… They have to be physically attached to their people. [But] they’re also very intelligent and athletic. They’re eager to please. I think everyone should have one… or two.”

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More info If you’re interested in adopting a Bombay cat, Wright highly recommends doing some research to learn what kind of care is necessary. You can learn more about the cats in general, as well as Wright’s cattery, on her website, www.greatblackbombays.com.

CONTINUED FROM page 47 the bond the two have. I can’t tell you how grateful I am to Karen… the fact that she raises these cats that can make such a difference in people’s lives. If I could have ten of these cats, I would.”

Hwang Kim said Teddy was instrumental in helping Emily come out of her shell. The formerly shy woman, who once was unable to talk or walk, now loves to engage with people

about her special cat. She even has an Etsy shop for hand-drawn stationery, Emily Kim Creations, that prominently features Bombay cats.

“He’s become an easy way for her connect to people,” Hwang Kim said. “I don’t know that it would have happened with any other cat. He brought out a different side of her. She just adores him, and he adores her, and it’s a fascinating connection they have.”

Grace Webb is a wandering reporter whose home base is Mankato.

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WELLNESS

W

ith the increasing popularity of yoga, I find it important to remember what the practice is about. I’ve noticed not only an increase in the number of yoga studios adding fitness blended classes for weight loss or muscle building, but also a spike in very expensive yoga brands. This is not very yogi of us. In fact, I’ve recently come across articles and news segments that touch on the potential racism and hypocrisy of this very topic. Despite this not being the intention, it is highly understandable that some may view our bastardization of the practice as offensive. It is through a yogic lens that they choose to let it be and allow our loss of the meaning of yoga to be, just that, our loss.

Yogic philosophy dates back more 5,000 years and is not meant to be a physical practice one comes to once or twice a week. In fact, yoga is meant to access a deeper human nature; which is how some often confuse the teachings with being a religion. The yoga practice is a mindset. A release from the attachments of the modern world and learning to live without need for the material. It’s a practice of constant self-study and choosing to work toward a state of pure existence. There are so many great teachings in the yoga world, including those of the Bhagavad Gita. To sum it up, each teaching comes back to discussing that idea of enlightenment - that this life is about coming to the path of non-reaction, nonattachment, celibacy, to let go of Ego, and surrender to something higher than the Self. It is a constant effort in letting go of that which does not serve our greater purpose – whatever that may be.

Last month, I was presented with a short video in which a yogi explained that the yogas have lost their meaning. He actually posed the argument that if we in any way financially benefit from the yoga practice, whether we own a studio, or accept money for

our time teaching, that we have entirely gone against the heart of the practice. I will admit that as a yoga instructor, this was a hard pill to swallow. I re-posted the video to my social media platform, listing my class times (recognizing the irony) and the first comment was, “Is your class free?” Unfortunately, most instructors have rent to pay on studio space, but many of us teach to share our journey.

For my co-teacher Chelsey Nelson and myself, yoga changed our whole lives by giving us a glimpse of clarity and a desire to be better than yesterday, every day. Yoga brought a spirituality into our lives that has saved us both from feelings of hopelessness and fear. Yoga taught us to be good for our own good, and the good of others. This is what she and I choose to share, and for those who join our classes each week, the take-away is theirs to decide.

As for the fashion industry, in regards to yoga pants, tops and other gimmicks, these in no way lead us toward the ultimate goal of the practice. The ancient yogis practiced in what might be considered rags, and they wore them for the same reason Jesus was portrayed to wear them. It was to stay grounded, unattached, and to not distract from their life’s purpose. Modern companies make money off of new styles, and whatever the trends are, be it hot yoga, fitness yoga, PiYo, Barre yoga – any marketable idea births new products designed to create the feeling that without them, we aren’t getting the most out of our practice.

The Catch-22 is that in our unconscientious consumerism, we’ve already taken three steps back.

Before these ideas had been brought to my attention, I would feel slightly downtrodden that I couldn’t afford well-made Lululemon pants or attractive Athletica tops, and that many of the clothes I teach in are riddled with holes I’ve stitched up by hand. I craved that “function meets fashion” style that I could use for my classes, as well as trips to the grocery store, or even girls’ night. I now see that my too-big tank tops and overly-abused leg warmers serve their purpose, and brand-new ones do not a good practitioner make. The practice is not how you look, but the mind, body, and spirit coming together through positive thinking, awareness, and peace of mind. So, if you’ve been concerned about your 10-year-old sports bras and all you’ve got to wear are t-shirts and pajama pants, rock it, honey! You are not defined by your image, but by he effort you put into self-study on and off the mat.

Rian Dicke-Michels is a highly independent, Minnesota State University Mankato graduate and the proud mother of an earthy 5-year-old. Although a 10-year yoga practitioner, she earned her 200RYT in 2015 from The Green Lotus Yoga and Healing center, and is continuing her education toward 500 hours. “My life is a continuous journey toward healing and self-love,” she says, “I’m honored to share it with you.”

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Unexpected CaregiveR

Styles that need regular attention

Berit Kari Berit is author of The Unexpected Caregiver, where you can find more detailed information about appreciating yourself.

Follow her at www.KariBerit.net

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’m sure you’ve seen someone with “bed head,” which according to “Urban Dictionary” can be either the messed-up hair you get after you’ve just woken up, or a result of hours spent with product to create a messy look. Often the person you see with the cowlick that hasn’t been smoothed is an older woman. They may have had their hair done, but a little nap in the Barcalounger and the salon look is gone.

They arrive for Sunday morning church with unintentional bed head.

Do you say anything? Do you offer to smooth it out?

Of course not. Most of us either comb through our own hair or make a verbal note to our spouse, “Don’t ever let me leave the house with that hair.”

I am somewhat obsessed with my hair, as I have two cowlicks to tame on a daily basis, but I wonder if this hair fetish will continue as I age? My mom washed and styled her hair until she reached her later 50’s when she started getting the weekly “wash and set.”

Her calendared hair appointments were her weekly outings. Toward the end of her battle with Huntington’s disease, she still made it to the salon. Every Thursday she’d have her hair done; this was an important component of her care.

Shampooing one’s own hair wasn’t as popular in the 1950’s and 60’s, according to Regina Ford of Green Valley News. It was business as usual to have one’s hair washed once a week. Ford tells about several women in their 80’s and 90’s who view their weekly hair appointment as a necessity. They wouldn’t dare show up to play bridge without their hair perfectly coiffed. One woman crashed her car over a curb and into a travel agency window en route to her hair appointment. Instead of waiting for the Sheriff to arrive, she dashed into the salon and instructed her beautician to begin while she waited to report her accident.

My generation - tail end of the Baby Boomers, beginning of Generation X; also known as “Cuspers” - prefer

cuts and colors to wash and sets. Still, going to the salon remains an important routine. I’ve often thought hair stylists would benefit from training in psychology, family dynamics and aging. When I’m at the salon, it’s not unusual to hear stories of caregiver woes from the next chair over. Just as with our wash and set mothers and grandmothers, stylists are vital to my generation’s routine of self-care. And just like my mother, I want to be taken to get my hair done if I can no longer drive myself.

Over the holidays I treated my motherin-law and myself to a pedicure. A friend, whose wife has Alzheimer’s disease, considers husband and wife pedicures as a “sweetheart outing”; it’s something they can do together that is both enjoyable and relieves him of a care task.

If I ever need care, please someone whoever you are - take me out for regular hair appointments. And don’t hesitate to tap me on the shoulder and say, “Pssst, Kari, your cowlicks need taming.” Unless I’m intentionally going for that bedhead look, I will appreciate being told that my hairstyle needs attention.

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BOOK REVIEW Book Review – “The Self-Discipline Handbook”

By Natalie Wise c.2017, Skyhorse Publishing $14.99 / $22.99 Canada 192 pages

Review by Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm

‘The SelfDiscipline Handbook’

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ake your pick.

Television, or getting that project done?

Finishing tax-prep, or cruising online? Burritos, or bananas? Take your pick; life always has choices… but read “The Self-Discipline Handbook” by Natalie Wise first, and you may gain more willpower.

Take a look at the closest dictionary, and you’ll see that self-discipline is basically “passion and purpose” and “doing what we think is right.” So now you know what it means… but does that make it any easier?

Yes, says Wise, because there are steps you can take to gain self-discipline. It starts small, and it grows with consistent practice. Another ingredient: knowing your strengths and “owning the negative parts of yourself” so you can watch that they don’t “trip you up.” Note which – strengths or weaknesses – are harder to accept.

Cultivate creativity and curiosity. Do so with a change in environment or perspective, and by nurturing yourself with occasional indulgences.

Take naps. Eat snacks. Put relaxation on your schedule, and be sure not to deny yourself.

That will help keep your energy up, because self-discipline “craves it.”

If you begin to falter in your path, add humility to your self-discipline tool kit and ask for help. There’s nothing shameful in a hand-up; the bonus is that it teaches you how to say “no” when you need it.

Have a hobby, but don’t dabble in “your hustle.” Eliminate “just because” chores and make sure there’s a reason for tasks you perform every day. Don’t just “get by” on the things that are important; if something’s really important, then “make it happen.”

Get organized, including a written list of daily tasks to be done. Find your passion, even if it’s not for the thing your self-discipline efforts are focused on. Break tasks up into smaller projects, if the whole feels too daunting. Know

Author Manoush Zomorodi

how to avoid burn-out at all costs. And be patient: gaining self-discipline is absolutely “worth achieving….”

Though it’s quite simplistic, “The SelfDiscipline Handbook” surely could be of some help to anyone for whom procrastination is the default position. It’s useful – but you have some get-through to get through first.

First of all, readers who just want the facts may bristle at the new agey-ness here. Talking to your body organs might seem odd to some, and the over-advice on healthy eating is rather superfluous in a time when nutrition guidelines are everywhere – especially when author Natalie Wise admits to be a major proponent of snacking.

Another angle: abounding alliteration’s also annoying, after all.

Still, how could you resist even just a small bit of focus-help? How could you resist a book that makes self-discipline so step-by-step attainable? If your workday is scattered and you know you can do better, you can’t – especially if you keep in mind that nobody says you have to read every single page.

If you’ve got goals and you’re feeling panicked or if you just need a brush-up, this book may be a good lifeline. Take a deep breath. It’s okay. “The Self-Discipline Handbook” is a book to pick… up.

-The Bookworm is Terri Schlichenmeyer. Terri has been reading since she was 3 years old and she never goes anywhere without a book. She lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 12,000 books. For more information, visit bookwormsez@gmail.com.

WATCH FOR OUR LATE SPRING ISSUE which will focus on Adventure Adventures can be found in all different areas of life, from physical to spiritual to creative to emotional and more.

• Dogsledding • Uncharted cross-country motorcycle trip • Long mountain trail hikes • Unlocking the mysteries of your ancestry • Finding to courage to take on new adventures/stepping out of your comfort zone • Writing and other uses of creativity as a way to learn more about yourself • Using a drone to capture adventure • New hobbies and ways of expressing your creativity • Mid-career transitions, doing what you always truly wanted to do • New ways of getting fit • Area B&Bs • Regional travel – finding ways to get away that you might not have thought of before • …..and more!

Southern Minn

LATE SPRING MAY/JUN 2018 Have an idea or suggestion?

To ADVERTISE:

Contact Beth Forkner Moe at bfmoe@southernminn.com

Contact Pam DeMorett by email at pdemorett@ faribault.com or call 507-333-3117

Girlfriends

CONTINUED FROM MEGHAN’S BLOG page 43

We must be our own before we can be another’s.

People asked my hobbies.

“My hobbies since living in Mumbai or…?”

I could have responded to that last year: Reading.

Taking walks. Blogging. Being alive in nature. Traveling.

But now?

I hadn’t connected with myself in that way in months. I hadn’t connected with anyone. I’d distanced myself from friends here, and pushed away my family and friends from home. I no longer felt a reason to talk to them, or anyone really.

“They’re going to know something is wrong.

They’ll know that I’m different.”

I couldn’t escape the noise. One day, the voices in my head grew louder than those around me. When it all ended, it somehow felt like a lie. Because I was a lie. The world came crashing down on me, every bad decision, every fight, every word not spoken.

But wondering tore me apart.

For days I sat in silence, ruminating on the past, wondering where it all went wrong. I wondered about myself.

I felt trapped in this body that I had been selfdestructing inside of for so long. Nothing made sense – and yet, I had to make sense of everything.

In reality, there was no real reason to pity myself.

Everyone goes through pain, suffering, drama. But I harness pain internally and let it stagnate in my head.

I write to unleash the thoughts, to make sense of my feelings, emotions, and self. While I’m still grappling with a way to express the emotions, writing has definitely helped.

After weeks of wondering what to say here, I’ve finally found the audacity to end this post. I breathe a sigh of relief. Closure.

December 21, 2017 What Are You Willing To Struggle For? Everyone wants to be happy.

Nobody wants to be confused, to wonder where the hell their life is heading, or to make the same mistakes over and over and over again.

And nobody wants all of the above, all at the same time. But it happens to the best of us.

In recent months when I would tell friends or family how generally confused I am, when I would make excuses for my decisions and/or actions, and they would ask me, “Well, Meghan why are you doing these things?” I would think to myself, “Good question, try asking me tomorrow.”

Then tomorrow would come around and I still wouldn’t know. Tomorrow would turn into the next week and the next week became two months; eventually I was sitting here wondering why an answer was not coming. Why, after three years of solo travel, I had yet to figure out what I was doing in life. Was I sabotaging my own happiness?

Then again, what 20-something knows exactly what they’re doing in life? Or what they want say, ten years down the line? I’ve answered that question at least a hundred different ways in the past five years.

I recently found an article I first read as a broke college student. Its emergence from the archives came at an opportune time, as I had subconsciously given myself an ultimatum: if I don’t find out what the heck I’m still doing in India by X date, I need to leave. For good.

So I read the damn article again. And it asked me a question the author claimed would change my life.

What are you willing to struggle for?

Is was as if India itself was asking, “Why are you still here, Meghan? What is it here that you are willing to struggle for? What about the polluted air, menial frustrations, months of homelessness, and snail-like infrastructure is making you stay?”

I’m no longer here to fix a broken relationship, I’m not here to prove myself as a model. I have no commitments, no long-term plans. I don’t have anything to prove to anyone except myself and that’s equal parts liberating and terrifying. And maybe the thought of leaving also terrified me.

Reading that question not only made me think about what I am willing to struggle for, but also the fact that I am currently struggling and there must be a reason behind it.

Why was I bearing this pain, these self-inflicted burdens? How much longer was I willing to go before my poor, poor ego eventually said, “Enough”?

It was no surprise I wanted to get out of the modeling industry, so in recent months I searched for various job opportunities. I was so excited. So much so, that I found myself only looking at the positives. I failed to think about my personal shortcomings, and if I would be willing to work through them and the hardships attributed to each position.

I think most of us do this. We blindside ourselves because, in the end, all we are thinking about is our own happiness. But in order to reap the benefits, we also need to fully understand and accept the costs.

Through the struggles – the bad days, moments of self-pitying, sleepless nights – we learn to define our own happiness.

And that’s the ironic tragedy of being an adult.

“What we get out of life is not determined by the good feelings we desire but by what bad feelings we’re willing and able to sustain to get us to those good feelings.”

And for some reason, it’s cleared my head quite a bit. It’s a bit cynical and I kind of like that.

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DIRECTORY

Financial Resources

Health & Wellness

Castle Rock Bank

Millstream Commons Assisted Living

The Castle Rock Bank has been serving the women in this community for 96 years. To answer the question, “What do women want in banking?” We believe the answer is, “To be heard, understood, respected and valued.” 27925 Danville Ave Castle Rock, 507-645-7751 www.castlerockbank.net.

EVENT RENTAL SPACE CAMP PILLSBURY

Hold your next event at the historical campus of Camp Pillsbury. Large auditorium, dining hall, conference rooms, ample meeting space and dormitory sleeping quarters that hold up to 750 overnight guests. Perfect for corporate events, weddings, concerts, leadership retreats, youth development retreats and more. 507-214-2200.

Food & Entertainment NORTHFIELD GOLF CLUB

Explore a refreshingly affordable golf membership opportunity. Northfield Golf Club is an 18-hole championship semi-private club located in the heart of historic Northfield. It is known for providing members and their guests an exceptionally well maintained golf course and an outstanding food and beverage experience along with a stately and comfortable club atmosphere for family, friends and business associates not found anywhere else. The club offers daily public dining, including lunch, and is available for corporate golf events, meetings, wedding receptions and banquets. You’re invited to explore MEMBERSHIP at Northfield Golf Club.

707 Prairie Street, Northfield, MN 507645-4026 www.northfieldgolfclub.com

Millstream Commons Assisted Living is located in downtown Northfield. 44 Assisted Living apartments (studio, 1 and 2 BR) featuring three meals a day, supportive nursing care, respite care, & life enrichment activities. Pets allowed. Licensed Housing with Services provider. Part of the Three Links Community. Member of Aging Services of Minnesota. 210 8th St W, Northfield, 507650-9627, threelinks.org.

Northfield Urgent Care

Tired of waiting to see your doctor for simple problems like sore throats and earaches?

We provide walk-in medical care for all ages, from infants to adults. We are open 7 days per week and no appointment is needed!

Quick, easy and efficient! 2014 Jefferson Rd Suite C, Northfield, MN 55057, 507-664-9999, northfieldurgentcare.com.

Northfield Retirement Community

Situated on a 30-acre, beautifully landscaped campus, NRC was established in 1969 to provide housing and services specifically designed to meet the physical, social, psychological and spiritual needs of older adults. Housing options include apartments with a minimal level of services, as well as other home settings that make increasing levels of service readily available. Options include rental and owner-occupied living spaces. Units are available for both income-sensitive and market-rate income levels. NRC also provides a fully-staffed care center for those who desire a more traditional nursing home setting. 900 Cannon Valley Drive, Northfield, 507-645-9511, northfieldretirement.org.

Home & Garden Judy’s Floral Design

Whether your wedding is black tie/ ballroom or barefoot on the beach or somewhere in between! Beautiful, quality flowers and great ideas start with Judy Smith. “Specializing in fresh creative and affordable blooms for all the flower moments of your life” 507645-0008, 1951 Division St. S., Northfield, judysfloraldesign.com.

Simon Bros Cement Co.

Simon Bros Cement Co. has been serving the Northfield area since 1969. We specialize in quality concrete and masonry including foundations, driveways, epoxy garage floors.

Call for a free estimate. We will look at your project and use 40+ years of experience to share ideas and advice. Call Ray 612-3284591.

Shopping The Paper Petalum

The Paper Petalum in the historic Archer House at 212 Division St., Northfield. offers friendly customer service and unique gifts for all occasions. Locally owned and operated since 1987 we specialize in Scandinavian gifts, Minnesota products, decorative napkins, Polish Pottery, Rothschild foods, and much, much more. Stop in and visit us.

507-663-0565.

SUMMER CAMP CAMP PILLSBURY

Camp Pillsbury is a unique day and sleepaway summer camp, offering over 100 activities! Flying trapeze, circus arts, musical theater, sports, magic, horseback, gymnastics, dance, technology, musical instruments and waterski– all in the same day. So many activities to choose from!

Camppillsbury.com 507-214-2200.

Transportation Northfield Lines, Inc.

Have your group arrive in style when you pull up in one of our luxurious motor or mini coaches. Single or multi-day sightseeing trips, shopping, girlfriend getaways, dining, concerts, weddings, receptions, casino visits – you name the event and we will get your group there safely and on time. 32611 Northfield Blvd, Northfield, 800-944-2190, www.northfieldlines.com.

WANT TO BE LISTED ON THE GF DIRECTORY?

507-333-3117 pdemorett@faribault.com 54

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downtown iar bault Have you been

lately?

n & thanks for your sup o o s u o port!

See y SHOPPING

1 - ACE Hardware 2 - Anadelas Novedades 3 - B&J Sewing 4 - Bloom Floral Designs 5 - Burkhartzmeyer Shoes 6 - Carriage House Liquor 7 - Chappuis Jewlery 8 - The Cheese Cave 9 - Creating A Ruckus Too! 10 - Erickson Furniture 11 - Fareway Grocery 12 - Fareway Spirits & More 13 - Faribault Vacuum and Sewing 14 - Fashions on Central 15 - Fette Electronics 16 - Fierce Nutrition 17 - Finally A Gift Store 18 - Fleur de lis Gallery 19 - Floors by Farmer 20 - Glass Garden Beads 21 - Grit and Grace 22 - Indoor Gardening 23 - Junk Monkey 24 - Keepers Antiques 25 - Kulmiye Groceries 26 - La Regia - Mexican Grocery Store 27 - Milltown Cycles 28 - Pawn Minnesota 29 - Ron’s Pawn Shop 30 - Ruf Acres Market

31 - Suenos de Quinceanera 32 - Voh’s Floors 33 - Weddings By Deb 34 - Zensational

DINING 1 - Anna Dee’s Cafe 2 - Banadir 3 - Bernies’ Grill 4 - Bluebird Cakery 5 - Crack of Dawn 6 - The Cheese Cave 7 - Depot Bar & Grill 8 - El Rancho Restaurant 9 - Gran Plaza Mexican Grill 10 - Lyon’s Meats 11 - Restaurante El Colibri 12 - Signature Bar 13 - Subway

SERVICES

1 - DuFour’s Cleaners 2 - Faribault Print Shop 3 - Geek Central 4 - Heidi’s Clubhouse 5 - Phone Station 6 - The Upper East Side

SALON

1 - Beauty Nook 2 - First Avenue Hair Design 3 - Hair Station 4 - Mirakel Salon 5 - JM Beauty Salon 6 - Ron Caron’s Old Towne Salon 7 - Studio 14 8 - Sunset Salon

AUTO

1 - Cenex Gas/Convience Store PUBS/CLUBS 2 - Community Coop Oil 1 - 10,000 Distillery - Opening Spring 2018 3 - Glenn’s Towing & Service 2 - American Legion 4 - NAPA Auto Parts 3 - Boxer’s Bar and Grill 5- Reed’s Central Auto Repair 4 - Grampa Al’s 5 - F-Town Brewery 6 - Knight’s of Columbus 7 - Lori Ann’s Bar 8 - Signature Bar

Like us on Faribault Tourism or Facebook Faribault Main Street

ATTRACTIONS

1 - Alexander Faribault trading with a Dakota trading partner stands in Faribault’s Heritage Park. Faribault artist Ivan Whillock created this sculpture which sits atop a fountain known as the Bea Duncan Memorial Fountain.

2 - Alexander Faribault House 3 - Buckham Center 4 - Cathedral of Our Merciful Saviour 5 - Paradise Theater for the Arts 6 - Village Family Theater 7 - Whillock Studio 8 - Restored Tilt-A-Whirl 1950s era car 9 - Restored Tilt-A-Whirl Classic car

MURALS • Bridging Us To Our Past - Alexander Faribault • Bruce Smith - 1941 Heisman Tropy Winner • Flecks Beer • Ice Skating on the Straight River • Faribault Annual Pet Parade Since 1939 • Rotary mural featuring restored downtown clock • Tilt-A-Whirl - A Family Classic Since 1926 • Welcome to Historic Downtown Faribault

DOWNTOWN LODGING 1 - Be My Guest Loft 2 - Historic Hutchinson House Bed & Breakfast 3 - The Inn at Shattuck-St. Mary’s 4 - The Upper East SIde 5 - Vintage Suites

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In the Neighborhood?

Let’s Get to Know One Another New to the area? Unfamiliar with the Edward Jones way of doing business?

Take an hour or so to learn how we work with millions of individual investors.

Together, we can create and implement an investment strategy designed to help you achieve your long-term financial goals. We tailor our recommendations based on you: your current situation, objectives and risk tolerance.

Call or visit today to schedule your personal financial review. www.edwardjones.com Member SIPC

Make Your Financial Future a Priority Cate Grinney, CFP® Cate Grinney, CFP® Make Your Financial Future a Priority www.edwardjones.com Call or visit today to schedule your personal financial review. www.edwardjones.com www.edwardjones.com Financial Advisor Call or visit today to schedule your personal financial review.

Cate Grinney, CFP® Member SIPC Financial Advisor Member SIPC Cate Grinney, CFP® .

Member SIPC Cate Grinney, CFP®

Financial Advisor

Cate Grinney, CFP® Financial Advisor 404 Heritage Place Financial Advisor 404 Heritage PlaceAdvisor 404Financial Heritage Place Faribault, MN MN 55021 404 Heritage 404 Heritage Place Place Faribault, MN 55021 404 Heritage Place Faribault, 55021 Faribault, MN 55021 Faribault, MN 55021 Faribault, MN 55021 507-334-1666 507-334-1666 507-334-1666 .

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