Gf bridal 2015

JAN 2015

FREE

girlfriends

Wedding Day

FASHION Take a look at some of the best wedding attire and designer wedding gowns available in 2015.

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your full-service wedding experts

495 W. North Street, Owatonna (507) 451-7220 www.cashwise.com

Let CashWise take the worry out of your wedding day!

No event is too big or too small!

Catering

Rely on CashWise’s Deli for all your catering needs!

We offer a variety of services including buffet style dinners, hors d’oeuvres or sandwiches! We’ll cater to your wedding or groom’s dinners.

Call Alex at 507-451-7220 (Catering Department)

Custom Cakes Let our expert staff help you choose the perfect cake.

From your favorite flavor to your wedding colors, we can create the cake of your dreams!

Call Darlene or Roxy at 507-451-7220 (Bakery Department)

Wine & Spirits

Champagne • Beer • Wine Cashwise liquor offers case discounts and party planning!

Call Dave at 507-451-8440 (Wine & Spirits)

The flowers you deserve at a price you can afford!

$12999 FLORAL WEDDING PACKAGE All Red Or White Roses

Floral Over $85 Savings!

1 Bridal Bouquet 12 Roses with greens and sheer ribbon 3 Bridesmaids Bouquets 6 Roses with greens and sheer ribbon 8 Rose Boutonnieres 1 Groom, 3 Groomsmen, 2 Ushers & 2 Fathers 2 Rose Corsages 2 Mother

Call Jodi at 507-451-8116 (Floral Department)

Free written estimates on all wedding orders!

girlfriends ABOUT US Volume 7, Issue 1

contents Features

WEDDING FASHION FOR 2015 | 4 For the bride and bridesmaids, groom and groomsmen, plus – we don’t forget your mother.

THE VENUE | 18

Copyright © Girlfriends 2015 Published January 2015 by: Southern Minn Media 115 W 5th Street Northfield, MN 55057 507-645-1110

A few area wedding reception locations to choose from.

Send releases and story ideas to:

Tips to individualize your reception.

Brenda K.M. Ward at Girlfriends magazine, bward@southernminn.com Publisher:

Lauran Rott

THE RINGS | 24 What are the latest trends?

WEDDING RECEPTION TO REMEMBER | 27 WHO PAYS FOR WHAT? | 28 We break it all down for you.

SECOND CHANCE AT LOVE | 30

Editor & Senior Writer:

Going into a second marriage? How is it different from the first time?

Contributing Writers:

THE “NEW” WEDDING CAKE | 36

Brenda K.M. Ward

Beth Forkner Moe Elizabeth Jacobs Tresa Erickson - AdBuilder Kari Berit Multimedia Consultants:

Steve Arnold Kristie Biehn Kathleen Davies Carly Dabroski Alisha Davidson Kari Dougherty Lisa Dwyer Debbie Ensley Betty Frost Kacie Karels Joan Koester Terri Lenz Mark Nelson Stacy Murphy Catherine Olson Mary Phipps Lauran Rott Jennifer Sorenson Gayle Stelten David Weeks Graphic Designer:

Kate Townsend-Noet Ad Designers:

Lauren Barber Mary Jo Blanchard Nicole Gilmore Naomi Kissling Keeley Krebsbach Jenine Kubista Kelly Kubista Kate McGillen Kayla McMullen Jennifer Schoenbauer

THE BRIDAL ISSUE 2015

Today more couples are getting imaginative with the dessert they serve their guests, choosing unique styles, flavors and types of sweets to celebrate their special day.

NOT YOUR MOTHER’S SHOWER | 38 Trend spotter offers tips for a hip bridal shower.

BOUQUET BRAVADO | 42 Trends in bridal bouquets.

KIDS AND WEDDING SIGNS | 43 Flower girl and ring bearer alternatives.

UNEXPECTED JOY | 44 Dad has asked someone out on a date.

ON THE COVER: } Hair by Lana Huberg and Jill Erickson at Salon Synergy Northfield, MN 507-645-0500 Makeup by Molly MacKay at Sunset Salon Faribault, MN 507-334-1714 Models L to R: Lana Huberg, Aspenn Ward, Megan Proft, Julie Erickson

Photographers:

Brooke Schroht Karen Legault BRIDAL ISSUE 2015 |

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BY BRENDA K.M. WARD

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tyle has a way of evolving with time, and wedding gowns are no exception. From tea-length mid-century looks to the billowy shoulders of ’80s style, gowns have certainly run the gamut in silhouette and fabric. Yet, the color white has remained a staple.

While shades of white are still prominent for bridal gowns, muted colors like café and light blush – or for some even a more bold merlot – are becoming more popular with brides, said Julie Larson, owner of Inspire Bridal in St. Peter.

With variety in color also comes various silhouettes, including airy ball gown, empire, A-line and sheath, with necklines ranging from classic strapless, to halter, open back, V-neck and oneshoulder.

“Twenty-fifteen is an exciting year in the industry with so many beautiful new styles, silhouettes and fabrics,” said Julie. “Lace continues to be popular this year making a lovely and classic statement.”

Whatever your personal style, having an excellent wedding gown buying experience is also important.

Weddings by Deb owner Deb Bauernfeind recommends beginning your wedding dress search about nine months before your wedding to accommodate for special orders (that can take up to six months) and extra fittings as the wedding nears.

Carefully consider, too, those you ask to join you for this memorable shopping trip. You want someone whose opinion and honesty you trust and value, said Deb – typically your mother, grandmother, sister or

best friend.

“Your ‘trying on’ experience should be engaging and just as exciting as when you knew you found your true love,” said Deb.

Hair and makeup Planning ahead for your hairstyle is also important when organizing your wedding planning list. Do you research beforehand to get a feel for the styles that most appeal to you, and bring those ideas to the initial consultation with your hair and makeup stylist.

Bring also any accessories you’d like to incorporate, like earrings, necklace or a headpiece.

“Keep in mind that you should reserve your hair appointment time four to six months in advance of your wedding,” especially if it is a summer or fall wedding, said Lana Huberg, owner of Salon Synergy in Northfield.

The hairstyle is, after all, the last piece of the puzzle, one for which you want to ensure a proper fit.

Trending hairstyles for this year include chignon, casual waves, French roll, vintage, origami bow, loose or fishtail braids and the use of a birdcage or floral headpiece.

Makeup trends lean toward matte skin; metallic gold on eyes; beige/brown or coral colored cheeks; coral, peach or poppy colored lips; and semi-nude nails with a gold sparkle tip.

We at Girlfriends hope you find inspiration for your personal bridal style in the following pages. And, we send you our sincere congratulations!

A

tux continues to be the most popular style for the groom’s wear in 2015, according to St. Clair’s for Men in Owatonna, though some men opt for the slightly more casual look of a suit. Color trends include neutrals in shades of grey (light, medium and charcoal), browns (tan, British tan and chocolate brown), navy blue and black.

Inspire Bridal:

204 S. Minnesota Ave., St. Peter; inspirebridalboutique.com

Weddings by Deb:

214 Central Ave. N., Faribault; weddingsbydeb.com

St. Clair’s for Men:

117 N. Cedar Ave., Owatonna; stclairsformen.com

HAIR Salon Synergy:

300 S. Water St., Northfield; salonsynergynorthfield.com

MAKEUP Sunset Salon:

511 Central Ave. N., Faribault; sunsetsalon.com

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INSPIRE BRIDAL BOUTIQUE INC; 4 x 10; Black; V003406; V003406; GIRLFRIENDS

MORILEE速 Gown is available in white, ivory and champagne. Shown in ivory.

Removable beaded belt, sizes available 2-28.

Found at:

Weddings by Deb 214 Central Avenue N Faribault, MN 55021 507.332.7171 weddingsbydeb.com

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MORILEE速 Gown is available in white, ivory and ivory caramel. Shown in ivory caramel. Alencon lace on tulle with wide border hem line. Sizes 2-28.

Found at:

Weddings by Deb 214 Central Avenue N Faribault, MN 55021 507.332.7171 weddingsbydeb.com

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INSPIRE BRIDAL BOUTIQUE INC; 4 x 10; Black; V003406; V003406; GIRLFRIENDS

MORILEE速 Gown available in white,ivory.

Shown in ivory. Sizes 2-28.

Beautiful double key hole back with crystal beading.

Found at:

Weddings by Deb 214 Central Avenue N Faribault, MN 55021 507.332.7171 weddingsbydeb.com

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ALLURE BRIDALS® A gorgeous fit and flare gown. The fitted bodice has a sweetheart neckline that is embellished with Swarovski crystals. The entire design is adorned with delicate lace appliqué on English net.

Found at:

Inspire Bridal Boutique 204 South Minnesota Avenue St. Peter, MN 56082 507.514.2224 inspirebridalboutique.com

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WEDDINGS BY DEB, LLC; 4 x 10; Black; F004485; F004485; BRIDAL PAGES

PRONOVIAS This mermaid wedding dress in tulle with lace, guipure and gemstone embroidery is ideal for romantic brides. The bodice has a deep V neckline finished with gemstones, a wide tulle skirt with lace and a deep opening at the back decorated with gemstone embroidery.

Found at:

Inspire Bridal Boutique 204 South Minnesota Avenue St. Peter, MN 56082 507.514.2224 inspirebridalboutique.com

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WEDDINGS BY DEB, LLC; 4 x 10; Black; F004485; F004485; BRIDAL PAGES

PRONOVIAS Lovely gown with three-quarter length Spanish lace sleeves. Adorned with French net and beautiful beadwork.

Found at:

Inspire Bridal Boutique 204 South Minnesota Avenue St. Peter, MN 56082 507.514.2224 inspirebridalboutique.com

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JEAN YVES Heather Grey Allure by Allure.

Tropical weight wool, shown with matching Allure accessories.

Found at:

St. Clair’s for Men 117 North Cedar Avenue Owatonna, MN 55060 507.451.2406 stclairsformen.com

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IKE BEHAR Black Ambrose by Ike Behar.

Luxury black wool shown with classic black accessories.

Found at:

St. Clair’s for Men 117 North Cedar Avenue Owatonna, MN 55060 507.451.2406 stclairsformen.com

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ST CLAIRS; 4 x 10; Black; A800463; A800463; BRIDAL TUX PAGES

MICHAEL KORS An elegant alternative to black. Desire by Michael Kors shown in Midnight.

Found at:

St. Clair’s for Men 117 North Cedar Avenue Owatonna, MN 55060 507.451.2406 stclairsformen.com

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Found at:

Dream Day Bridals

by Marcia 634 W Bridge Street Owatonna, MN 55060 507.413.6160 ddbridals.com

ALYCE PARIS JASMINE This elegant A-line dress is a versatile classic fit for any kind of occasion. The dress comes with lace straps that drape over the shoulders and ruching in the Tiffany chiffon bodice and waist to create a classic V neckline.

Look your best at your next formal event in this Jean De Lys short dress.

The sheer lace sheath over a sweetheart bustline, slim fitting dress features gorgeous kimono style draped sleeves, flattering ruched waistband with beaded detail for that extra sparkle, as well as a keyhole opening on the sheer lace back.

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ALEXANDER’S

Weddings or grooms dinners we will take care of your every need! Exceptional event space with vast windows, hardwood floors and loft-like ceilings combine to create an ambiance that will be remembered for a lifetime.

Alexander’s Supper Club 31 3rd Street NE Faribault, MN 55021 507.334.5868 alexanderssupperclub.com BRIDAL ISSUE 2015 |

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ALEXANDERS SUPPER CLUB; 4 x 10; Black; F004457; F004457; GF BRIDAL VENUE PAGE

THE INN AT SHATTUCK-ST. MARY’S Weddings and receptions together on the beautiful Shattuck-St. Mary’s Campus.

The Inn at Shattuck-St. Mary’s 1000 Shumway Avenue Faribault, MN 55021 507.333.1900 theinnatssm.org

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LINNAEUS ARBORETUM For weddings as nature intended. Large or small wedding ceremonies.

Gustavus Adolphus College St Peter, MN 56082 507.933.6181 arboretum@gustavus.edu

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THE WOODS Overlooking both the Shoreland Country Club and Lake Emily, The Woods Grill & Bar is the perfect location for your wedding reception.

The Woods 43779 Golf Course Road St. Peter, MN 56082 507.934.4209 woodsgrillbar.com

Making Your Wedding Dreams Come True From a grand affair to an intimate setting, Holiday Inn and Suites will customize your special day!

Let us help you plan your perfect wedding!

• • • • • • •

Receptions up to 250 Guests Ceremonies Engagement Parties Bridal Luncheons Bridal Showers Rehearsal Dinners Guest Lodging

2365 43rd Street | Owatonna, MN Exit 45, next to Cabela’s | 507-446-8900 www.holidayinn.com

Wedding Information: Sherri Severson - 507-446-3107 BRIDAL ISSUE 2015 |

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Engagement Ring

BY DORIS A. BLACK

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ROUND HALO Tell her about your true feelings with this spectacular diamond engagement ring and wedding band. This scintillating double halo design features a brilliant round center stone surrounded by a circle of beautiful yellow accent diamonds. The popular infinity style band features a two-tone ring that glistens in 14 karat white and yellow gold.

Kottke Jewelers 115 North Cedar Avenue, Owatonna jewleryconnect.com

NIKI J From the Niki J collection of branded fine engagement rings.

Made with very fine workmanship in 18K Gold and Euro Shank.

Paffrath Jewelers 685 West Bridge Street, Owatonna paffrathjewelers.net

ou’ve found the girl of your dreams and you’re ready to take the big leap into marriage, now what? It’s simple—present her with an engagement ring if you want her to say, “Yes!” But what should you buy?

How much should you spend? What type of ring would she like? These are all common questions asked by men ready to take the plunge.

Originally the engagement ring signified that a woman was “spoken for.” It wasn’t until the 1600s that a more romantic significance was attached to the ritual. During this time engagement rings were called gimmal rings and there was one for the groom as well as the bride. They were entwined until the man offered one to the woman who captured his heart. Both parties would wear the rings until the wedding ceremony.

Then at the ceremony, the groom would remove his ring and place it on her finger.

Although we only use one ring today, its meaning remains the same.

There are no set rules of etiquette for buying an engagement ring, but there are some important facts to consider before making a purchase. First, set a budget.

Two months’ salary is a common guideline but it is not set in stone. Figure out what price range best works for your situation and stick to it. Second, choose a reputable jeweler. Look for one who is a member of the American Gem Society or Jewelers of America. A good jeweler will help you choose the best ring for your budget without pressuring you to “upgrade” as some commissioned salespeople will try to do.

Third, do a little homework before setting foot in a jewelry store.

Most women would love to receive a diamond engagement ring, but other stones are acceptable, too. As a matter of fact, you may want to take your fiancée along to choose her own ring. Stone, style and cut are all a matter of personal preference.

In general, diamonds are valued based on these four characteristics: Cut is the most important factor in determining the value of a diamond. A good cut will enhance the diamond’s natural beauty; it will sparkle and reflect light off its many faceted surfaces. A stone with 57

facets is considered brilliant cut and is the most desirable.

Clarity refers to the flawlessness of a diamond. Some low-quality stones may have flaws visible to the naked eye, but many other flaws, or inclusions as they are called, can only be seen through a jeweler’s loupe. Inclusions look like cloudy areas within the stone. Diamonds are graded according to clarity. Those with minimal inclusions not visible to the naked eye are graded VVS1 or VVS2. Stones with clearly visible flaws are graded I1 or I3. Only the rarest of diamonds are flawless.

Color also determines a diamond’s value. The less color, the more valuable the diamond. Diamonds are graded on the alphabet scale from D-Z. Colorless grade D diamonds are the most valuable. However, there is an additional category for diamonds which naturally contain a large amount of color. They are called “fancy” diamonds and may be pink, yellow, green, blue or red. These are extremely rare and among the most expensive.

Carat refers to the size of the diamond in weight. The larger the diamond, the more valuable it is. A carat is equal to 100 points. Therefore, a .75 carat diamond is 3/4 of a carat in size.

When you first visit the jeweler, ask them to show you diamonds of different sizes, colors and clarity, so you and your fiancée can see for yourselves how these diamond characteristics come into play with price.

For a selection of stones other than diamonds, consider some of the other precious or semi-precious stones, such as sapphires, rubies, emeralds, pearls, opals or garnets. Of course, a few of these, such as emeralds and rubies, may cost more than a diamond, but they make magnificent engagement rings.

While at the jeweler, you may want to glance at the estate jewelry. Many of the old settings are quite spectacular and may accommodate the stone of your choice.

Heirloom jewelry is another alternative.

If you have a ring that has been handed down in your family or has particular sentimental value, it is perfectly appropriate to offer it as the engagement ring as long as it was not owned by a former fiancée.

Keep in mind the four C’s when shopping for a wedding ring and you’ll do just fine. Choosing the right ring sure beats getting married with a cigar band.

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Bridal Fair OWATONNA 2015

Sunday, January 18th 10:00 AM - 3:00 PM Holiday Inn Hotel & Suites Interstate 35, Exit 45, Owatonna

Fashion Show Noon

Featuring the latest wedding trends

by St. Clair’s for Men and Dream Day Bridals by Marcia

Cake Dive 2:30 PM

Grand Prize Packages

Photo by Jordana Snyder of Jordana Snyder Photography

Only engaged couples are eligible to register for Cake Dive & Grand Prize Packages.

Package One Banquet Hall Rental ($1700 value) Gift Certificate towards Wedding Tuxedo Rental One Year Unlimited Tanning Package Jewelry Donated by: Holiday Inn Hotel & Suites, St. Clair’s for Men, Haute Tanning, and Paffrath Jewelers Total Package Value $3450

Package Two Banquet Hall Rental ($1600 value) Gift Certificate towards purchase of a Wedding Gown Donated by: Owatonna Country Club, Dream Day Bridals by Marcia Total Package Value $2100

Sponsored By:

Owatonna.com

135 W. Pearl • Owatonna • 507.444.2389

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Wedding Do’s CLARKS ARTISAN SHOES The perfect comfort for the mother of the bride/groom.

Owatonna Shoe 121 N Cedar Ave., Owatonna owatonnashoe.com. $100-135

CAKES, CAKE POPS & CUPCAKES

HAND-ROLLED CANDIES

Perfect cakes, cake pops and cupcakes for your bridal parties and wedding.

Costas has been making hand-rolled candies for over 90 years. Every piece of quality chocolate and candy is hand-dipped, rolled, and wrapped. Costas boxed chocolates make excellent gifts. Call or stop by today to pick up a box of Costas’ decadent chocolates!

Perfect Day Cakes 324 N Cedar Ave. Owatonna perfectdaycakes.com.

Costas Candies and Restaurant 112 N Cedar Ave., Owatonna costas-candies.com, 507-451-9050 Like us on Facebook!

FAMILY FEATURES

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hether it’s set in the great outdoors, a lavish ballroom, the couple’s favorite restaurant or at home, the wedding reception is a special time for newlyweds to celebrate with family and friends.

The signature dessert – cake – is usually the centerpiece for this occasion, a continuing reflection of the wedding theme and colors. An assortment of cupcakes or a tower of layers allows today’s cakes to take almost any form – from square to round, even pillow or heart-shaped.

This stunning all-white creation from the wedding experts at Wilton is both simple yet elegant. Cake layers are covered in pure white fondant, while additional bands of fondant glistening with white sparkling sugar decorate the bottom of each tier.

Dots of sugar pearl sprinkles, resembling perfect pearls add a hint of texture, while a gem-studded monogram topper adds the finishing touch.

This unique do-it-yourself wedding topper kit can easily be customized…with one initial, two or a trio. Self-adhesive crystal-like gems are used to trace the initials onto the clear disc. Gems can also be used to create a border or other complementary design. After the reception, it makes a perfect keepsake for the couple that will be treasured for years to come.

Guests will want to raise a glass in honor of the newlyweds with the timeless custom of a champagne toast. Decorated flutes for the bride and groom create a long-lasting memory of this special tradition.

Individual boxes are ideal for truffles or other candies to send home with guests.

Tie with ribbons reflecting the color theme of the wedding. Another fun memento is a mini champagne bottle favor that can be filled with small candies. Attach a label with a personalized message. Make it elegant or simple…and always make it meaningful and memorable.

For more do-it-yourself wedding ideas, favors and accessories, visit www.wilton.com.

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Who pays for what?

...........................

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ith a wedding comes a budget – but for whom?

The Knot (theknot. com) provides an easy reference for the wedding couple and their parents as to the “traditional”

Ceremony

• Bride and family pay for church or synagogue, sexton, organist, etc.

• Groom and family pay for marriage license and officiant’s fee.

Clothes • Bride and family pay for bride’s dress, veil, accessories and trousseau.

• Groom and family pay for groom’s outfit.

• All attendants pay for their own clothing (including shoes).

Flowers • Bride and family pay for arrangements for church and reception, plus bouquets and corsages for bridesmaids and flower girls.

• Groom and family pay for bride’s bouquet, boutonnieres for men and corsages for mothers and grandmothers.

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A guide to wedding expenses from

split of expenses. But remember that there is no set rule, and no reason to throw anyone into bankruptcy. Create and affordable budget and keep an open line of communication with those who are contributing to the costs.

Reception

Honeymoon • Groom and family pay for honeymoon.

Photography • Bride and family pay for wedding photos and video.

Pre-wedding parties • Bride or groom’s family plans and hosts engagement party. If more than one, bride’s family hosts the first one.

• Groom’s family plans and hosts the rehearsal dinner.

• Bride plans and hosts bridesmaids’ luncheon.

• Groom hosts and plans bachelors’ dinner.

• Maid of honor and bridesmaids host shower.

• Best man and ushers host bachelor party.

• Friends may throw additional engagement parties or showers.

• Bride and family pay for all professional services, including food, drink, decorations, and music.

Rings • Bride and/or her family pay for groom’s ring.

• Groom and/ or his family pay for both of the bride’s rings.

Stationery • Bride and family pay for invitations, announcements and wedding programs.

Transportation • Bride and family pay for wedding transportation of bridal party to and from ceremony and reception.

Owatonna

5 OFF

$

Dream

Day

your purchase of $30 or more

BRIDALS by Marcia Experience the

only intimate bridal salon

in Owatonna

Wedding Gowns Bridesmaid Dresses Mother of the Bride/Groom Dresses Flower Girl Dresses Tuxedos Prom Dresses Winter Formal Dresses Cocktail Dresses Quinceañera Dresses Wedding Accessories 634 W Bridge St. Owatonna, MN 507-413-6160 www.ddbridals.com Hours: WEDNESDAY-FRIDAY: 5-8 PM SATURDAY: 10 AM-5 PM SUNDAY:1-5 PM

We Offer Catering For All Occasions

Expires Apr. 30, 2015.

Not valid with any other offers or during happy hour.

Time to KICK BUTT! Easy as 1-2-3

1045 W Frontage Rd, Owatonna 507-455-8568 1 Week • andiamomn.com

Time to KICK BUTT!

happy hour: Mon-Thurs: 3-7 pm

369 18th St SE, Owatonna 507-413-6235

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DOW CHIROPRACTIC 507.451.1691 152 East Pearl•Street • dowchiro.com • 507.451.1691 152Street East• Pearl St. Owatonna 507.451.1691 • 152 East Pearl • dowchiro.com

Mon-Fri 8:30-5:30; Sat. 9-1 Closed Sundays

www.cedarfloral.com

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Second chance at 30

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BY BETH FORKNER MOE

hen a couple walks down the aisle, they intend their marriage to last forever.

In reality, though, about one-third of every couple who marries is doing it for the second (or more) time: couples like Jennifer and Steve of western Wisconsin; Jana and Rick of Winona; and Connie and Craig, a retired couple living in Northfield.

They all have different backgrounds and histories, but their stories share some striking similarities.

Going into a second marriage, each couple agreed, is completely different than it was the first time. Often, there is much more discussion about values, the relationship and the idea of supporting each other, than there may have been as their younger, more starry-eyed selves.

“This time, it’s 100 percent/100 percent,” said Jennifer. “We work much harder to take care of each other.”

Jana and Rick were high school sweethearts

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Rick (middle back) and Jana (third from right) Craft and family.

who reconnected 20 years later. They spent many hours talking through and making decisions about how their married life would work.

“You can’t stroll into a second marriage.

It has to be a conscious decision,” Jana said.

“You have to work on yourself, and figure out what happened the first time.”

Connie agreed. “We made the decision to accept each other as we are. We don’t try to change each other,” she said. “I had to learn to understand myself, own up to my weaknesses and take responsibility for myself. Each person in the couple really needs to know themselves.”

The child factor When people re-marry, children are often part of the picture. No matter how old the children, having parents marry again – whether after a death or a divorce – means adjustments for every member of the new Connie and Craig Ryberg.

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and blended family.

Jana entered into her marriage with two young daughters, while Rick had two teenage sons. One of the conscious decisions the couple made was that their children were their children.

“We don’t have any ‘step’ labels in our lives,” Jana said. “A kid is a kid, and we all work together to take care of our kids.”

Today, she and Rick, along with her ex-husband and his wife, work together to make the decisions that affect their daughters. Be it school conferences or the hospitalization of a child, all four parents are there as a team.

But sometimes, it’s not quite that easy.

Jennifer and Steve’s children didn’t all embrace their parents’ connection. Jennifer’s children are a little older than Steve’s, and she has a grandchild; Steve has a teenager.

Each of the children has dealt with the new relationship in their own way, at times positively, and other times nonchalant or

immaturely – each in a manner that reflected the child’s age and relationship with the other parent. Jennifer acknowledged that this has been a difficult part of her and Steve’s relationship. They both want the other to be happy and for their children to be happy, but that’s not always possible.

Dan Dimick, a psychologist and marriage and family practice counselor in Northfield, says the key to making children comfortable with their parents’ remarriage is for the couple themselves to be as emotionally healthy as possible. It’s important to let go of resentment and lingering issues from the previous marriage.

“It’s like algebra,” he said. “If you get the first line wrong, all the lines afterward will also be wrong.”

When a couple gets married, he said, it’s important to be very clear about their roles with all of their children. Whether children are young or grown, he said, it’s important to give them time and room to get over the sense of deep loss they may feel after their birthparents have divorced.

Key elements to happiness Communication – and more communication – is key to a strong second marriage – a concept that all three couples agreed upon. Without open and clear communication, they believe, it is difficult to make everything work, from day-to-day events to working with ex-spouses on issues involving children.

Dan agreed.

“Communication is absolutely key,” he said.

“Without it, people get stuck. It’s important for the adults to be emotionally healthy, have good self-esteem, be empathetic, being willing to sacrifice for the common good and use humor.”

“We talk about things – about everything,” Jana said. “And we use a lot of humor, with each other and with the kids.”

But most important in the second marriage is the relationship itself. Jana and Rick, Jennifer and Steve, Connie and Craig – each

couple says that they are intentional with each other, and with themselves.

“We realize the second time how precious time is. We don’t have time to stress about the little stuff,’’ Jana said.

Connie agreed.

“We are both so very happy. It’s like finding a hidden treasure. We appreciate each other and don’t let the little things bother us,” she said.

Connie and Craig have found that giving one another with plenty of positive feedback and encouragement to express their feelings, and working on issues when they first surface, are very important to their marriage.

“Since neither of us had any intention of remarrying, we are so grateful to have someone to love and with whom to share the rest of our lives,” Connie said. “Love is important, and it’s so wonderful to have someone to share this journey. We plan to live fully, until we are not able to anymore. And then we will deal with it.”

Beth Forkner Moe is a non-profit consultant and writer in Winona. You can learn more about her on her webpage, www.

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The changing ceremony It used to be that brides wore their best dress for their wedding, no matter what the color. Only when Queen Victoria married Prince Albert in 1840 did white become considered “the” color for wedding dresses.

However, for a long time it was considered inappropriate for a second-time bride to wear white. Since white was considered the color of purity or innocence, brides were discouraged from wearing white for their second wedding. Off-white or ecru were considered appropriate, as was simply wearing a short dress or suit.

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Another second-marriage tradition that has changed is including children in the ceremony. Many couples today include their children as attendants, readers or helping with other parts of the ceremony. Some families light unity candles together, and others make sand art, using a different color sand for each member of the new family, later to be displayed in their home.

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✓ Your personal property: What happens to your personal property like household contents, jewelry, artwork, collections, family photos and family memorabilia? Weigh the financial and emotional values each family member places on these items before deciding how they’ll be distributed. Clearly state this in your will. ✓ Prenuptial agreements: Some couples use a prenuptial agreement to determine how assets would be divided in the event of divorce or death. This may also include property, support, and inheritance. ✓ If you become disabled: Consider executing a durable power of attorney and a health care proxy to determine who should have the right to make financial or medical decisions if you are incapacitated. You may want to consider long- term care insurance to protect the inheritance of any non-spousal beneficiaries.

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Pe Bluebird dessert.

STORY BY ELIZABETH JACOBS

A

wedding day is filled with myriad details, including the decorations, the dress and of course, the dessert.

Today more couples are getting imaginative with the

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dessert they serve their guests, choosing unique styles, flavors and types of sweets to celebrate their special day. As a result, bakeries have seen an increase in requests for wedding cupcakes, nontraditional cakes and dessert buffets.

“Popcorn, truffle candies, different types of cake, brownies, a fondue bar – it is fun for couples to give guests a large variety. It customizes the experience,” said Kelsey Wittmeir, owner of Bluebird Cakery in Faribault. “I think everyone has an idea to be able to really make it their own and fit in their budget.”

Cupcakes, for example, offer a greater array of choices and are a more affordable option for some. It is a trend that took off, in part, thanks to TV shows like “Cup Cake Wars,” said Thea Farrington, owner of The Perfect Day Cake in Owatonna.

Some current popular flavors including chai, dreamsicle and red velvet can be matched with icing that pairs with wedding colors. Using cupcakes also allows the couple to avoid the cakecutting fee that most venues charge along with giving their guests a multiple flavors to chose from.

Perfect Day dessert.

Bluebird dessert.

Bluebird dessert.

Perfect Day dessert.

Perfect Day dessert.

Perfect Day dessert.

Farrington says TV shows like “Ace of Cakes” and “Cake Boss” have also brought wedding cakes to a higher level of creativity, for those who choose that route. Many couples are opting for their own spin to the traditional tiered cake by personalizing it, she says. This varies from simply adding color to making a unique cake that represents their personality or a certain passion. Farrington has had requests for wedding cakes with firefighting, holiday and 1950s themes.

Couples may also entertain the use of nontraditional frosting, moving away from fondant – a type of frosting that gives a

smooth, elegant look yet has a gummy texture – and opting instead for a frosting like butter cream to enhance flavor and texture.

Others that wish to combine the variety of flavors that cupcakes offer with the look of tiered cakes are ordering a small cake for each table, which in many cases also serves as the centerpiece.

Alternatively, some couples choose to have no cake at all and instead offer guests a dessert buffet featuring a variety of sweet bite-sizes morsels. A dessert buffet can be customized based on the preferences of the couple and the guests and may

feature such items as tarts and cheesecake or candies and cookies. Although, said Farrington, a dessert buffet can be rather expensive if the couple serves a large variety of baked goods.

With such a vast assortment of choice for your big day, it is important to make your decision with two things in mind: taste and budget.

“Just make it a cake (or dessert) they would like to eat and an experience they would like to have,” said Wittmeir.

“People are coming to honor the couple and celebrate their day.”

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Trend spotter offers tips for a

BY FAMILY FEATURES EDITORIAL SYNDICATE

I

f you’ve been to a wedding shower recently, you’ve probably noticed the timehonored tradition is changing.

The typical Sunday afternoon gathering of ladies playing word games and snacking on pastel Jordan almonds has been replaced by sophisticated themed evenings. And sometimes men are invited too!

“We monitor trends in both weddings and showers so we can incorporate the freshest and most modern themes in our cards,” explains Gale Thomson, American Greetings trend spotter. “We’ve found wine, gourmet kitchen and couples themes are the new wave. Changes

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BRIDAL SHOWER

in dating and relationship etiquette and other social factors, like career women postponing marriage, have directed showers away from providing basic necessities and more toward reflecting the couple’s interests.”

Thomson offers these tips for planning some of today’s top trendy bridal shower themes: Wine tastings reflect a popular interest. The wine theme can influence the menu, party activities and gifts. Invite guests to bring two bottles of wine: one to serve at the party and a second to give the couple.

Search online for menu items to complement each wine, and display wine-pairing notes at each food and wine station.

Couples showers are a great way to include both the bride’s and the groom’s friends, and they tend to be cocktail, dinner or summer barbeque parties. Couples showers are a good option for smaller guest lists or as one of multiple showers. A note on the invitation could suggest gifts for future entertaining. American Greetings has taken note of this hot trend by introducing special couples shower cards to its Target line, like one with tiny pink and blue “His” and “Hers” cloth towel icons attached to the front.

Kitchen showers have moved away from providing basic necessities and become more sophisticated, reflecting already-established brides and gourmet cooking trends. High-end stainless steel fondue pots, blenders and food processors are topping gift registries and wedding Website wish lists. Invite guests to bring their favorite recipe to share with the bride.

Personal gifts, indulgences the bride would never buy for herself or honeymoon trip items are also a fashionable shower theme option for

gift wrap design guru. There are even gift bags designed for specific items. And they keep getting better and better looking, with fashionable details like ribbon handles, scalloped or cuffed “necklines,” trendy colors and prints.

New gift wrap designs reflect today’s elegant wedding fashions.

Wrap featuring photos of trendy wedding flowers, like white roses and hydrangeas, and embellished with clear sparkling crystalline glitter are recommended for the well-dressed gift. Accessorize with ribbon, a bow and fun new package decorations, like a 10-karat “diamond ring” or a feather boa pompom.

Flauto suggests even ordinary household items can make a wrapped gift the star of the gift table. “The key is to pick a few accent colors to complement your wrapping paper. For example, to dress up a gift wrapped in paper

second marriages or brides who are already established in their households. Spas are a great personal shower venue, and a gift certificate for spa services presented in a pretty card makes a wonderful gift.

Showers may be changing, but they are still an important part of the wedding tradition.

If you’re planning a shower and want it to be the latest and greatest, try one of these party concepts.

Wrap Like a Pro When it comes to gifts, presentation is everything. Wrapping that incorporates details and added touches can magnify the perceived value of what’s inside, so don’t forget to wrap and tie with style.

“For soft goods or items that do not easily fit in a box, use gift bags.

They combine convenience and style in all shapes and sizes,” says Patty Flauto, American Greetings

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with black and white photo images, add a few pink, black and white accent items from sewing supplies.

Layer two kinds of ribbons, sheer and satin or thick and thin, or two shades of yarn. Use hot glue to add a flower cut from a greeting card or a key phrase, like ‘I do,’ and top it with a button or two or three. If you’re wrapping a smaller gift box, you could pick up two of the same shower card, using the extra to decorate the entire top of the box.”

or binder. Some even find crafty and creative ways to display them.

Keepsake cards today shine with satin, lace, ribbons, rhinestones, sequins and even embroidery — three rhinestone “bubbles” hover over a line drawing of two champagne glasses, or the piece may feature fabric miniature attachments (a little ivory pillow carrying two tiny rings or a wedding cake made with layers of ribbon).

Even more treasured are the sender’s handwritten wishes, especially when they reflect personal relationships with the bride and groom.

These words will be remembered always.

Make Lasting Impressions Every bride treasures her shower and wedding cards. Many lovingly store them in a special box

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BY TRESA ERICKSON

B

rides have been carrying bouquets for hundreds of years. In ancient times, bridal bouquets generally consisted of garlic, herbs and spices to keep evil spirits away. By Victorian times, fresh flowers had replaced the garlic, herbs and spices, and many of these flowers carried special meanings, like innocence, faith and love.

Floriography, the language of flowers, continues to this day, with some brides researching flower meanings and basing their bouquet selections on those meanings. Floriography isn’t the only trend in bridal bouquets. There are many others. Here is a brief review.

Bridal bouquets are traditionally pale in color, but today’s brides are branching out and choosing bolder colors, like burgundy, red and purple. Bouquet color schemes can be monochromatic—all shades of purple, for example—or complementary. With bouquets getting brighter, they have become a real feature in wedding photography, in particular black and white photography with selective coloring.

Roses remain a bridal bouquet standard, but other flowers

are starting to make their way into the mix. Daisies, hydrangeas, lilies, peonies and tulips are popular choices, as are orchids.

Many brides, in fact, are asking for more tropical flowers in their bouquets, either because of their theme or for a unique twist.

While cascades of flowers were once the norm in bridal bouquets, many brides today are opting to take a simpler route.

Hand-tied bouquets are a popular choice. With the flowers gathered together and wrapped in ribbon, the bouquets are easier to handle and have a contemporary look to them.

While today’s bridal bouquets might be somewhat simpler in design, brides can still add some dazzle to them with beads, crystals, feathers, pearls, sequins and other accessories. Brides with themed weddings can take it a step further and incorporate extra special touches into their bouquets, like miniature seashells, pinecones or butterflies. Bouquets featuring vintage brooches are also becoming popular.

Bridal bouquets can run the gamut from the traditional allwhite hand-tied rose bouquet drenched in crystals to the sassy gold, red and purple bouquet cuffed by feathers. It is up to the bride how she wants her bouquet to be. Brides should check out some samples, talk to their florist and select a bouquet design that speaks to them.

H

ave you seen the ring bearer and flower girl photos with their cute signs? How adorable are these?!?!

This brings the flower girl and ring bearer to a completely diffent level. Whether your sign is sweet or adds a little humor to your special day, let the kids spread some joy!

Source: On The Go Bride, onthegobride.com

Details: He Asked-She Said Yes via Pintrest (source unknown) / Cell Phone signs via A Paper Proposal / All You Need is Love sign via Family Attic Shoppe / Here Comes the Bride from Jason Crader Photography via The Wedding Post / Here Comes your Girl from Gem Photo via Joyful Weddings and Events / Happily Ever After via Our Hobby to Your Home / Just Married from Young Hearts Photography via Style Me Pretty.

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Kari Berit

UNEXPECTED CAREGIVER Kari Berit (www.KariBerit. com) Caregiver Coach, radio show host and author of The Unexpected Caregiver, who addresses audiences nationwide on issues of aging and caregiving.

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Unexpected Joy

I

knew the day would arrive. My dad is funny, energetic and good looking – he is a catch!

But I wasn’t prepared when he said to me, “I asked someone out on a date.”

“Okay. Do I know her?”

“No, you don’t, but I’d like you to meet her.

She’s the deli lady.”

I recall my mind racing. Dad had purchased meals from the deli for that last years when mom could no longer cook. Does that mean he’d been eying this woman even when my mom was alive?

I met the deli lady one evening while shopping.

It was an awkward moment. After Dad introduced me, I busied myself at the spice rack, trying to not eavesdrop on what they were chatting about.

My dad dated the deli lady and a high school gal pal at the same time. He found it humorous to write on the calendar which woman he was taking out when.

I understand that the desire to be with another person doesn’t stop just because one gets older, or loses their spouse. Love happens all the time, and sometimes at unexpected times.

My dad met his second wife in their grief group, saying to me, “I don’t know, Kari, there’s something about this woman in my grief group.”

To which I replied, “Well then, you better ask her out.”

I understood from our conversations that the two women he was dating were not interested in commitment.

My dad and I have always had the kind of

relationship that allows for open conversations, but to be honest, I never thought I’d have dating conversations with my dad!

But how many of us expect to be caring for our parents? Isn’t this why we identify with “unexpected caregiver?” We want to believe that our parents will live forever. When one of our parents dies, we don’t jump to the next possibility: That the surviving parent may marry again. Marrying again after one loses a spouse is becoming common, but the concept is still uncomfortable for some adult children. Granted, for the Generation Xer’s (born between 1965-80) divorce is more common, thus making remarriage an easier pill to swallow. For the Boomers (born between 1946-64) losing a parent and watching the surviving parent fall in love is not easy medicine to swallow.

The reality is, late-life love can be spectacular.

Gone are the farfetched expectations you look for in a partner, or the unrealistic dreams you strive to achieve. We fall in love with a person for who they are at the present moment, rather than banking on the idea that we can fix them. As unexpected as it may be, second-time around love takes on unique twists. Some couples fall in love, but still hold on to their individual homes; others move in together without officially tying the knot; while still others choose the more traditional route of marriage.

The bright spot is – it doesn’t matter what others do! Love in later life is flexible, original, creative and open to whatever makes sense for the couple.

There is not one way to make it work.

So when my dad said he wanted to marry the woman he met in the grief group, my first response was “Don’t legally marry her, Dad. Have the ceremony, but remain single.” (This came from having just settled his will and been assigned his power of attorney. I also understood from him that she was receiving a pension and was in a secure financial state. Why comingle assets when it doesn’t serve the individual parties?)

And this is just what they did. Their ceremony was beautiful and sweet. They don’t need to explain the details of their relationship to anyone (but the IRS) and are happy as two peas in a pod.

We never know what life will bring us. To experience love later in life or a second or third or fifth time around can be, well, an unexpected joy.

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MARY KAY – SONJA HARRIS

CURVES OF OWATONNA

It’s all about YOU! Superstar treatment with getgorgeous know-how. Share-worthy secrets that are simply divine. Laugh-out-loud friendships that last a lifetime. Feel-good beauty that really makes a difference. Exercise the right to make beauty all your own. Ask me how, I can help. As a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant, I help women, and also men, find the Mary Kay skin care, body care, fragrances, and color cosmetics that bring out their best look and create healthier skin. I also recruit people to a fabulous team of women that are daring to see their dreams become a reality! I look forward to working with you – wherever you live in the USA. Sonja Harris, Mary Kay Beauty Consultant 507-213-9569, sonjaharris@marykay.com www.marykay.com/sonjaharris

FIT FOR LIFE

MILLSTREAM COMMONS ASSISTED LIVING

Fit for Life is a 24-hour Fitness Center located just off Hwy 21 N. We specialize in individual and group personal training as well as weight management and group fitness classes. State of the Art Cybex Equipment is on site for those who prefer to do it alone. 1400 Cannon Circle, Suite 6, Faribault, 507-333-5430 www.fitforlifemn.com.

HOLLAND FAMILY DENTAL

Holland Family Dental is located in the Professional Building on Hillcrest Ave. in Owatonna. We have been in Owatonna since 1996 and concentrate on dentistry for the entire family. We offer services in preventive, cosmetic and comprehensive care which includes implants and up-to-date dental technology. Please visit us at 605 Hillcrest Ave. Owatonna MN. 507-451-7250.

Millstream Commons Assisted Living is located in downtown Northfield. 44 Assisted Living apartments (studio, 1 and 2 BR) featuring three meals a day, supportive nursing care, respite care, & life enrichment activities. Pets allowed.

Licensed Housing with Services provider. Part of the Three Links Community. Member of Aging Services of Minnesota. 210 8th St W, Northfield, 507-650-9627, threelinks.org .

NORTHFIELD URGENT CARE

Tired of waiting to see your doctor for simple problems like sore throats and earaches? We provide walk-in medical care for all ages, from infants to adults. We are open 7 days per week and no appointment is needed! Quick, easy and efficient! 2014 Jefferson Rd Suite C, Northfield, MN 55057, 507-664-9999, northfieldurgentcare. com.

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Girlfriends Guide THE NORTHFIELD AREA FAMILY YMCA

The Northfield Area Family YMCA is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing opportunities for all individuals, families, and the community to achieve their fullest potential. From summer camps, to youth sports, to preschool activities and adult wellness, we have something for everyone. Become a member of the YMCA! 519 Division Street, Northfield 507-645-0088, www. northfieldymca.org. Scholarships are available to ensure everyone can participate.

NORTHFIELD RETIREMENT COMMUNITY

Situated on a 30-acre, beautifully landscaped campus, NRC was established in 1969 to provide housing and services specifically designed to meet the physical, social, psychological and spiritual needs of older adults. Housing options include apartments with a minimal level of services, as well as other home settings that make increasing levels of service readily available. Options include rental and owner-occupied living spaces. Units are available for both income-sensitive and market-rate income levels. NRC also provides a fully-staffed care center for those who desire a more traditional nursing home setting. 900 Cannon Valley Drive, Northfield, 507-645-9511, northfieldretirement.org.

Home & Garden JUDY’S FLORAL DESIGN

Whether Your Wedding is black tie/ ballroom or barefoot on the beach or somewhere in between!

Beautiful, quality flowers and great ideas start with Judy Smith. “Specializing in fresh creative and affordable blooms for all the flower moments of your life” 507-645-0008, 300 Railway St. North, Dundas, judysfloraldesign.com.

SIMON BROS CEMENT CO.

Simon Bros Cement Co. has been serving the Northfield area since 1969. We specialize in quality concrete and masonry including foundations, driveways, epoxy garage floors. Call for a free estimate. We will look at your project and use 40+ years of experience to share ideas and advice. Call Ray 612-328-4591.

Insurance AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE BART JACKSON AGENCY

American Family Insurance offers home, automobile, atv, motorcycle, boat, commercial business, farm and life insurance. We are available to meet with you personally to review your situation and provide recommendations as to the proper coverage’s for your needs. Bart Jackson Insurance Agency, 408 Central Ave N, Suite D, Faribault, MN 55021. 507-332-6812.

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SAGE INSURANCE SERVICES TERRI WHITESONG AGENCY

You have choices for insurance. Let’s find them together. Terri Whitesong, independent agent, Sage Insurance Services, LLC with Insurance Producers Network. Serving women and their families in MN and WI. 507.645.5010 sageinsurance.ipn@gmail.com

Salons BLOWN AWAY SALON & SPA

Blown Away Salon & Spa offers a variety of services that are perfect for any budget. The salon side offers hair cutting, styling, coloring, & perming. All of our staff is experienced and attends regular classes to keep our guests updated. On the spa side, we offer massage with therapists specializing in Swedish, Deep Tissue, Prenatal, & Reflexology. Our Esthetician does body waxing, makeup lessons/applications, lash extensions, facials, microderm, and chemical peels. Getting married? Check out our great bridal packages! 159 18th St. SW, Suite 4, Owatonna, MN 55060. www.blown-away-salon.com.

Shopping A TOUCH OF CHARM

From your bridal bouquet to the boutonnière tucked into the groom’s lapel to the center pieces, flowers help put the finishing touches on your wedding day. We are here to help you choose the perfect flowers for your dream wedding. Call today to set up an appointment for a free consultation with our professional floral designer, Leanne Hanson. A Touch of Charm 330 East Main Street Blooming Prairie. 507-583-7637. atouchofcharmonline.com

THE PAPER PETALUM

The Paper Petalum in the historic Archer House (212 Division St.) offers friendly customer service and unique gifts for all occasions. Locally owned and operated since 1987 we specialize in Scandinavian gifts, Minnesota products, decorative napkins, Polish Pottery, Rothschild foods, and much, much more. Stop in and visit us. 507-663-0565.

WANT TO BE LISTED ON THE GF DIRECTORY?

507-645-1110 lrott@northfieldnews.com

Transportation COMMUNITY CO-OP

The Community Co-op is located in beautiful and historic downtown Faribault, MN. We were organized in 1925 and have been a cornerstone of this community ever since. We specialize in fuels, lubricants, tires, and vehicle service, all for an affordable price. Women live busy lives, our staff understands how important service and convenience are. That is why we are the Company where our customers send their friends. 9 Central Ave, Faribault 507-334-2056, www.coopoilfblt. com.

NORTHFIELD LINES, INC.

Have your group arrive in style when you pull up in one of our luxurious motor or mini coaches.

Single or multi-day sightseeing trips, shopping, girlfriend getaways, dining, concerts, weddings, receptions, casino visits – you name the event and we will get your group there safely and on time.

32611 Northfield Blvd, Northfield, 800-9442190, www.northfieldlines.com.

Travel CEDAR TRAVEL

We pride ourselves to be a full service travel agency serving the needs of our customers since 1989! We want to take time to know your needs and find the perfect fit for your memorable vacation, so stop in or call for a consultation! Whether it’s a honeymoon, romantic vacation, family reunion or a getaway with your girlfriends, our agents are live and here for you!

Our staff is available Monday-Friday 8:30AM-5PM and enjoy sharing stories of our favorite destinations!

111 Cedar Avenue, N. Owatonna, MN 55060 www. cedartravel.net 50-745-51170.

The

Perfect Tan For the Perfect

Bride

ULTIMATE TAN Y LL CA & LO NED ED! OW ERAT OP

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK • 8:00 AM - 9:00 PM • 332-9948 1746 GRANT ST, FARIBAULT MN (across from Harry Brown’s) •.ultimatetanfaribault.com

DESIGN B.Schroht Design | Photography | Print | Web

b.schroht@icloud.com 507-456-1369

Discover a new you

We can help you look your best Mayo Clinic Health System provides cosmetic surgery options near you including: • Rejuvenation of the face and hands • Body contouring and liposuction • Breast and facial reconstruction Albert Lea | 404 West Fountain St. Albert Lea, MN 56007 507-373-2384

Owatonna | 2200 26th Street NW Owatonna, MN 55060 507-451-1120

Call today to schedule your consultation.