Celebrating Women - 2nd Edition

CELEBRATING WOMEN a publication of family transition place

women helping women the shelter movement

Samantha Russell

REACHING THE LAUGH RESORT WITH

Susan Stewart

One woman’s story comes full circle.

Lyn Allen

26 years of helping women

Helping Elder Women a plan to make a difference

the voices initiative giving voice, taking action against violence

March 2013

CELEBRATING WOMEN a publication of family transition place

This image is from the International Women’s Day website. Artist: Priya Anand Pariyani. Title: Mother.

4 Letter from the Editor 6 Women Helping Women

– The Shelter Movement

8

Rewriting the Story – The Voices Initiative

10

Reaching the Laugh Resort

12 Full Circle - One Woman’s Journey

14

Helping Elder Women

15 Women & Wealth

30 I’m Girl – Youth

Tips for Prosperous Living

Education

16 Fe-Line Women 18 House of Many

32 An Excellent

Blessings

Working Relationship

33 The Self-Nurtured Woman

20 Live Your Life

Consciously

22

Woman’s Best Friend

24 Lyn Allen – 26 Years of Helping Women

28 Supplement Your Day

EDITOR IN CHIEF: Stacey Tarrant ART DIRECTOR: Liesje Doldersum CONSULTING EDITOR: Bethany Lee

CONTRIBUTORS: Morgan Braganza, Sara Celik, Anne Chambers,

Sabina Greenley, Kim Hayes, Debra Jones, Lori Kapush, Norah Kennedy, Kathryn MacDuffee, Anne-Marie Pollowy-Toliver, Nancy Rorke, Kathy Shackleton, Susan Stewart, Stacey Tarrant, Jo Thoenes PHOTOGRAPHY: embracephotography.ca / stock

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Celebrating Women

Letter from the Editor

Family Transition Place & International Women’s Day •••I am delighted that our second issue has come together with new, inspiring and informative stories. Like last year’s inaugural issue, this magazine is a reflection of a community coming together to support a cause – Family Transition Place. The magazine is published in conjunction with our annual celebration fundraiser luncheon event taking place on International Women’s Day (IWD) and 100 percent of the advertising proceeds support Family Transition Place.

The underlying theme of this year’s magazine is Women Helping Women. In these pages, I hope you’ll be inspired by some amazing women and their stories, and as well by the women authors wanting to share their ideas and areas of expertise to help you in your life journey.

I am continuously inspired and overwhelmed by the generosity of the many individuals that have stepped forward to make this a success. Thank you to the IWD committee for their help in selling ads, to our amazing authors for their contributions, to Bethany Lee, our volunteer copy editor for her astute craft in editing and attention to detail, and to Liesje Doldersum from Sprout Advertising and Design for masterfully putting all the pieces of the puzzle together to craft this beautiful publication. I am so fortunate to be connected to such a generous community that is willing to support the work that we do.

Last but not least, I’d like to dedicate Celebrating Women to all women, who are an inspiration to others – as mothers, sisters, and friends. Remember, March 8th is your day!

Let’s celebrate together!

Stacey Tarrant Editor-in-Chief and Manager of Development & Community Relations Family Transition Place 519.942.4122 ext. 240 | stacey@familytransitionplace.ca

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Celebrating Women

International Women’s Day has been observed since the early 1900’s, a time of great expansion and turbulence in the industrialized world that saw booming population growth and the rise of radical ideologies.

Since 1984, Family Transition Place (FTP) has been providing critical services to women and their children who have experienced abuse and unhealthy relationships.

Inside FTP’s doors, women find a warm and welcoming place where their safety and well-being is the most important thing in the world.

Whether they need a safe place to live, or the services of a professional, skilled counsellor to assist them on their journey, FTP is there to help.

Youth Education: Family Transition Place is a leading provider of Youth Education programming – an initiative committed to eliminating bullying and building healthy relationships in our community.

Winners is proud to support Family Transitions Place in celebration of International Women’s Day

Learn more about our commitment to your community at www.winners.ca

women helping women - the shelter movement Lately it seems each time I open a newspaper I find myself reading stories about women doing remarkable things. Women are standing out, they are making the world take notice of the issues they know to be important, they are changing the course of history, and they are doing it in ways that are different from what has already been tried – predominantly by men.

They are putting themselves on the line for causes like aboriginal rights, human justice, education and the environment. They are making us take notice of injustices or causes that have largely been glossed over – often simply because they are termed “women’s issues”, and therefore never deemed worthy of systemic support.

One example of this remarkable work that is near and dear to

by Norah Kennedy Executive Director, Family Transition Place

in North America was Interval House in Toronto, opening its doors in

my own heart is the Women’s Shelter Movement. Although the need

1971. Today there are almost 600 shelters in existence across Canada,

for such a movement has always existed, its origins started just a few

yet the very first conference of Canadian Shelters and Transition Hous-

decades ago in the late 1960’s and ‘70’s. Domestic Violence had long

es was held in Montreal just last fall. Also in 2012, the 2nd World

been considered a “private matter” to be dealt with individually, not

Conference of Shelters was held in Washington DC., where shelter

collectively, and, as such, it had never been addressed by male-dom-

workers from 96 different countries came together to share histories,

inated governments and justice systems. This “hands off” attitude left

challenges and to inspire one another.

women stuck in intolerable situations with literally no place to go. The

Most shelters were originally “staffed” by volunteers, many run as

Shelter Movement sprang from an understanding that if there was to

co-ops, by dedicated women who understood how critical it was to

be any help for women and their children living with violence, it was

make this social experiment a success. For many of the women who

going to have to come from other women.

became shelter residents, it meant the difference between life and

Pioneering a movement. The first conversations took place

death. As the movement grew, the roles of these founding women

around kitchen tables. These were conversations between women who

evolved. Some went on to become the voices of the movement, work-

became the true pioneers of the movement, who would go on to give

ing to bring about a change in attitude and to bring their message

tirelessly of their energies, resources and time. These conversations

to elected officials. Their message was clear: that woman abuse be

lay the groundwork for the creation of a movement, the removal of

recognized as a societal problem and tax dollars be allocated to ensure

institutional barriers and, ultimately, lobbying for legislation to protect

the viability and sustainability of emergency shelters.

Others became the backbones of their agencies, doing whatever job

women.

In a historical sense, the movement is still young. The very first shelter

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Celebrating Women

needed doing. Some assumed the roles of executive directors, some

became front line counsellors. Many of these founding women are still there. At Family Transition Place, in the past few years, I’ve been honoured to present three remarkable women with their 25 year, long term service awards!

As Executive Director, I see firsthand the fruits of the labours of such remarkable women. In our community it was those early, initial conversations that led to the opening of Hillside House in 1985. The house itself was a single family dwelling on a residential street in town, yet through commitment and ingenuity, the house was often required to be able to accommodate up to as many as twenty or more women and their children. It operated this way for many years. With stable funding and the support of a generous community for a capital campaign, Hillside House officially became Family Transition Place in 1997 when it opened its doors on Bredin Parkway.

Where are we now? Over the years, many things have changed besides location. Government funding brought some stability, but it also brought higher levels of accountability and reporting. Women are coming into shelters with issues that are more complex than ever, ensuring the need for a highly qualified and experienced staff. Yet

despite the growing professionalizing of the sector, we are never really far from our grassroots beginnings. We are still predominantly women, (now joined by a few good men!) working to fulfill the vision of a violence-free society. Our driving force is to be there when we are needed by other women in crisis. The passion and dedication of the founding women is mirrored by the agency staff of today, some of whom are one and the same. For these women, and for many others who are doing the work in shelters all across the world, this is not a job, it is a responsibility.

The idea of women coming together to accomplish something that cannot be done through traditional channels is not exclusive to the shelter movement, but I believe it is one of the great success stories.

The women who founded the shelter movement and opened the doors to the first shelters are responsible for saving many lives and improving countless others. There is much we have learned from this model for change … and we are continuing to learn from remarkable women as can be seen in today’s world news. Women help women. They do it with a tremendous sense of purpose and accomplish it with creativity, commitment and drive.

domestic violence – some statistics 61% of all Canadians say they personally know at least one woman who has been sexually or physically assaulted On average, every six days a woman in Canada is killed by her intimate partner. In 2009, 67 women were murdered by a current or former spouse or boyfriend Over half of Canadian women have experienced at least one incident of physical or sexual violence since the age of 16 On any given day in Canada, more than 3,000 women (along with their 2,500 children) are living in an emergency shelter to escape domestic violence Violence against women exists in all cultures, ages, religions, sexual orientations, educational backgrounds and income levels. Calls to the

Assaulted Women’s Helpline come from a range of socio-economic backgrounds who may not all access shelters but still require critical and immediate assistance In just one year in Canada, 427,000 women over the age of 15 reported they had been sexually assaulted. Since only about 10% of all sexual assaults are reported to the police, the actual number is much higher The cost of violence against women in Canada for health care, criminal justice, social services, and lost wages and productivity has been calculated at $4.2 billion per year Source: Assaulted Women’s Helpline website - www.awhl.org/women-abuse/ violent-against-women

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Celebrating Women

Rewriting the Story: The Voices Initiative It seems every headline in the newspaper highlights bad news. “Woman mugged.” “Woman raped.” “Woman murdered by her partner.” by Morgan Braganza Bad news seems to capture the attention of the public. But as women, we long for good news and we long for a happy ending. Even in the beloved fairy tales we were told as children, there was struggle and hardship, before the happy ending.

The story I would like to tell involves a journey towards a

happy ending.

This story begins with women – Every day, we hear the stories of women describing their encounters with violence. These women are from every age group, every background and every community. They are us.

Violence against women has been woven into the fabric of our societies and has been a reality for hundreds of years. Violence against women is the hardship included in stories before they reach the happy ending. Snow White was poisoned. Cinderella was confined against her will. Rapunzel was locked in a tower. These are the stories we hear as children, and they are mirrored when we open the local newspaper. Violence against women is such a struggle and such an old story that a happy ending seems impossible. How can something so prevalent be changed?

In this story, the ending will be different, and the cast of characters will fight back against violence. In this story, women are working together to end the hardship that has been a part of our social reality for generations.

– and a dream... In the Town of Caledon and Dufferin County, a dedicated and inspirational team of women and girls have assembled to dream to change the story in their communities. They have joined together to end violence within their communities in a very strategic way. Family Transition Place is supported by funding from Status of Women Canada, making this team’s important work possible.

Some research – A team of women from the Social Innovation Research Group (SIRG) at the Lyle S. Hallman Faculty of Social Work at Wilfrid Laurier University has also

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Celebrating Women

joined the fight to end violence against women, by researching the ways in which violence can be ended in our communities.

Their research will illuminate the voices and stories of other women and girls in these communities and highlight their ideas for ending violence against women. The team very appropriately calls their work “The Voices Initiative: Engaging Brave Discussions about Violence against Women and Girls.”

Research can be a step in the journey towards achieving social transformation. The purpose of research is to ask questions, discover new and innovative ways of thinking, knowing and behaving, ultimately leading to change. Research can be the catalyst for women to help women, can ignite a community and mobilize action towards their happy ending. The result of these research efforts will be an action plan for ending violence, written using the words spoken by members of the community and implemented by the community.

– and a strong cast of characters.

The battle to end violence against women is one driven by women helping women but it is important to also recognize our allies. Many men within these communities have stood alongside the women and girls dedicated to this important initiative. The team of women and girls, Family Transition Place, and the research team at SIRG are strongly supported by the humbling and inspirational dedication of many men who are sharing their creative suggestions for how to end and prevention violence against women. The story of change must include men as our allies.

In the Town of Caledon and Dufferin County, a small but mighty (and growing) group of women, girls and their male allies are seeking their happy ending – a world free of violence against women using research to achieve this goal.

To learn more about The Voices Initiative: web: familytransitionplace.ca/events/the-voices-initiative/ blog: voicesinitiative.ca Facebook: facebook.com/VoicesInitiative The team at the Social Innovation Research Group (SIRG) Dr. Ginette Lafrenière, Director & Principle Investigator of the Voices Initiative Coordination of the Initiative is under the leadership of Morgan Braganza (PhD student) Social media is under the direction of Sandy Hoy (PhD candidate)

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reaching the laugh resort >>why making the journey back to who you really are is worth the jet lag by Susan Stewart Long before I became an author and inspirational speaker, I performed stand-up comedy. I did stand-up for about five years and then one day in 2003, I literally woke up in the morning and decided to quit.

The reason I quit comedy was because it became increasingly more difficult to be funny when I would spend most of my day listening to and believing the negative and fearful thoughts that would play over and over in my head. Ah, the good ol’ “mind-chatter”. That internal monologue that dispenses gems such as, “When am I ever going to get it together?!”

“Nothing ever turns out the way I want it to!” “I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing and people are soon going to figure that out!” Sheer misery. If there’s one thing I know in this life is that negative self-talk sure makes you bitchy. Have you ever had that moment when you realize that the one person you’re the most tired of being around is you? Nobody at those comedy clubs had to criticize me or put me down because I was already doing a fine job at that myself. During one of the episodes of her long-running television show, Oprah Winfrey said, “You are not your negative thoughts.” You know what, Oprah is right (again!), because when you think about it, being a comedienne and a heckler all at the same time just doesn’t make any sense. One of those voices wasn’t telling the truth.

Our truth is quite the opposite of what you may have grown to believe.

We are not our negative and fearful thoughts. We are not the dramatic stories in our heads. We are not our judgements, attachments, or expectations.

Our true nature is joy.

That’s right. Joy. Think of babies. When we are born, we don’t think to ourselves, “I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing and people are soon going to figure that out!” Yes, babies cry and scream, but the reasons are purely biological. We grown-ups love basking in the light of these tiny beings who have the ability to give

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Celebrating Women

the present moment their undivided attention. We love being around someone whose completely still mind allows them to be at peace all the time. This is why all kinds of people talk about wanting to have a baby and no one ever talks about wanting to have a teenager. I think we say, “Babies are so cute!”, but I believe on a sub-conscious level, we’re reveling in the reminder of who we really are.

Along with our true nature being joy, our default setting is unconditional love. Babies accept and love everyone exactly the way they are. Our standard equipment (much like the standard features of a car) includes peacefulness, laughter, playfulness, enthusiasm, and curiosity. We exude all that powerful stuff right at the very beginning! It’s later on in life that we often have to send out a search party to find our sense of humour.

You might be thinking, “Okayyyy...my true nature is joy...I get that, but, of course I was happy when I was a baby - I didn’t have a job - I didn’t have responsibilities - I didn’t have to deal with all the stuff that comes with being an adult!” What if your highest purpose was to face all of life’s challenges while staying connected to your true nature? What if the only thing that truly matters is that you unconditionally love yourself and others? Easy to do?

Not for most people. However, it is possible for all of us to be who we really are in the midst of our busy, challenging days if we pay attention to what’s happening in our minds. Awareness.

This constant act of awareness is also called “mindfulness” and “consciousness”. Whatever you want to call it, it’s this awakened state that most likely has saved you from flatulating in the middle of a yoga class.

Since I have a bit of history with suffering, paying attention to what’s happening in my mind has become a powerful tool that has slowly, but surely, helped me lighten up and reclaim my true nature. I know there are those people who are as happy and care-free today as they were in the beginning. I’m not like those people. You know those people - the optimists - they’re always positive, always excited, always in a good mood. All hell is breaking loose and there they are still floating around smiling

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away thinking, “I’m loved, loving, and loveable!” I’m not one of the floaters. I have to work at it every day. I work hard to see the world and be in the world in ways that I once used to. To be quite honest, if I’m not really careful, I can easily become a depressed and anxious inspirational speaker. Ahem.

Paying attention to your thoughts is the key to having your mind know what your soul knows - that you are here to be a physical expression of unconditional love to yourself and others. That is the only thing that truly matters. Your mind knowing what your soul knows is actually remembering what you once already knew.

You knew this right at the beginning and then as you grew up, you were simply told otherwise. Cue the “mind-chatter”.

As you consider living your life with more awareness in order for your mind to know what your soul knows, I will alleviate any anxiety you may be having from thinking, “Great, just another thing I gotta do in my day,” by also offering you the idea that your personal growth process is actually done. It’s always been done.

It was done the day you arrived. I know it sounds odd, but you can’t deny the evidence captured in photographs and/or video taken of you during the first couple years of your life. There you were drooling away in your diapers all joyful and loving of all.

A master of peacefulness, laughter, playfulness, curiosity, and enthusiasm right at the beginning of your life. When it comes to living with lightness (another way of saying personal growth), there is nothing to learn, but often much to un-learn. Think of yourself as an onion removing layers of thoughts and beliefs that have led you to forget who you really are and the one thing that truly matters.

One of my favourite Zen proverbs states, “Knowledge is learning something every day. Wisdom is letting go of something every day.”

What do you need to let go of in order to be the real you? As I learned the hard way being a stand-up comic who took herself and her life far too seriously, it’s not the letting go that hurts, but the holding on.

full circle - one woman’s journey The first International Women’s Day Fundraiser luncheon in support of Family Transition Place was held in March 2010 and featured guest speaker, Tosca Reno – a fitness model, motivational speaker, nutritional expert and leader of the Eat Clean revolution. Tosca, in true form, shared her enthusiasm, energy and motivation and changed one guest’s life. Read how Samantha Russell’s story went full circle and helped Family Transition Place. by Lori Kapush Samantha Russell before (l) and today (r), 50 lbs lighter.

Samantha Russell has endured a lifelong struggle with her weight. Her sedentary lifestyle and 9-to-5 desk job contributed negatively to her weight loss battle. She soon found that her weight had escalated to 177 pounds on her 5’1” frame.

Discouraged by how she looked and tired of being overweight, Samantha heard about the upcoming fundraiser hosted by Family Transition Place. Curious to learn more, she picked up one of Tosca Reno’s ‘eating clean’ books. Samantha decided to follow the Eat Clean program and slowly began to change her eating habits. By the time she attended the fundraiser luncheon event, she had already dropped fifteen pounds, but admits her motivation was starting to wane.

At the luncheon, Samantha recalls looking at Tosca and thinking, ‘She was me’. ‘She’ was a housewife who had become somebody she didn’t recognize anymore. She also recalls what Tosca refers to a Body Beautiful Formula – 0% genetics, 10% training and 80% nutrition. Up until that point, Samantha realized like so many of us, that it isn’t all about exercise, but more about what you put in your mouth. Surrounded by the enthusiasm of three hundred women in the room, Samantha’s determination was refuelled to continue her weight loss journey.

She knew she needed to add fitness to her change in lifestyle and decided to attempt running.

While the thought of running seemed ridiculous to her at first, she eased her apprehension by joining a running group. She began her new ambition slowly. Running for one minute and walking for two until she gradually increased the length of running time, all the while building endurance and confidence. By June, she had entered a 5 km run and then began to consider the possibility of a 10 km run. It was her running instructor that convinced her to train for a half marathon (21.5 km) instead! And so her journey continued. Later that year, Samantha crossed the finish line of her first half marathon and cried tears of happiness in reaching her goal.

Samantha’s Tips

for Eat Clean Success

Remember there is no magic pill. It’s good food and exercise. This is a lifestyle; not a diet.

Drink lots of water.

Plan a day ahead. Samantha always cooks extra so she can take it for lunch the next day and always has her water bottle in tow.

When it comes to eating out, Samantha usually takes along a few items so she knows there will be something there she can enjoy. Her favourite? Black bean brownies (stop groaning, they’re really good) with homemade frozen yogurt.

When tempted, Samantha asks herself if the food in question will help or hurt her progress toward her goals.

Support is key. In addition to friends and family, other resources such as online communities can be helpful. Reading other people’s stories can provide hints and inspiration.

Samantha mentally checks in with herself and her goals each day by keeping an inspiration board by her bed.

Now, 50 pounds lighter, Samantha is pleased that that she is now living a stronger, healthier, fit life. After losing (and keeping off) the weight, Samantha donated her clothing* that no longer fit anymore to Family Transition Place. In her mind, it was the perfect way to give back. Way to go, Samantha! *clothing donations can be dropped off at As We Grow in Orangeville on behalf of Family Transition Place

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IWD Magazine

women and girls in developing countries - some statistics •

12 million girls in Sub-Saharan Africa may never get the chance to go to school.

•

Annually, more than 350,000 women die from complications related to pregnancy and birth.

• 215

• Every

• Pregnant

• 1.3

million want, but do not have, access to family planning rights. women and children under five years old are most vulnerable to contracting malaria.

20 seconds, a mother loses her child from a vaccine preventable disease. billion people live without electricity, over 65% are women and girls.

UNfoundation.org/features/international-womens-day.html

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Helping Elder Women I am almost 75 years old, caring for an 87 year old spouse with dementia. We have been together for almost 40 years and we still have a good life together, limited though it may be. We want to stay together, in our home, but 24/7 caregiving, year after year, takes its toll. I am but one of many in this situation and we need support.

In 2006, there were 2,046,890 Canadians aged 75 and over (of which the majority are women); by 2016 this population is expected to increase to 2,563,400, and by 2036 to 5,537,400.

Today, women make up almost three-quarters of Canadians with Alzheimer’s disease. Within a generation, the number of Canadians with Alzheimer’s disease or a related dementia will more than double, ranging between 1 and 1.3 million people. The increase towards an older population is an international reality, and social support systems grapple with various responses.

Aging at home is the ideal for many of us. “Aging at home” is also the mantra of governments, yet I am frequently told by Alzheimer and local health care professionals to start looking for a nursing home for my husband. Why? Why would we have to submit to what our government calls an “involuntary separation of couples”, where the afflicted person is deemed to be safer, or better off in a nursing home. While in some cases this is true, studies have shown that up to 70 per cent of nursing home patients could be adequately and appropriately served in a less intensive (and less expensive) environment.

Two major issues affect our lives as well as government expenditures.

1. keeping couples together, and 2. providing a wide range of more appropriate care and support for the people we currently place in nursing homes.

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Celebrating Women

By Anne-Marie Pollowy Toliver, architect, Ph.D.

Is it possible to address both these issues (and perhaps others) simultaneously? Yes, it is. And yes, we can – or at least we could if policies and financial allocations were reviewed and revised to create an integrated system of services with public/private cooperation. Such a network would create a range of options: from easily available and accessible “respite” for the “at home” caregiver, to a newer “keep spouses together” support setting.

Let’s look at some examples: The Sunnyside Home in Waterloo (socialservices.regionof waterloo.ca/en/seniorsServices/communityalzheimerprograms. asp) serves adults with Alzheimer disease or related cognitive impairments. They offer a day program, weekday and weekend overnight stay programs, a supportive housing program, a longterm care facility and a wellness centre for older adults.

Australia seems to be moving toward keeping couples together. Although couples have to relocate, at Freedom Aged Care (freedomagedcare.com.au) every apartment comes fully equipped with kitchen, etc. No need to pay for hospitality services or nursing care that is not needed or wanted.

As the number of seniors increases everywhere, a wider variety of services are needed, where medical perspectives are complemented by a social perspectives, and includes the caregiver.

What can a small locality do to become a model community for elder support? Here are some not so humble ideas (that I will continue to develop in my blog): Let us consider a mixed-use complex that includes residential, support and commercial entities. Placed on air-rights above or part of shopping centres, or above a supermarket parking lot, it could provide for easy access to stores and reduce the need for some hospitality services. This complex could include: > Extended day programs, weekday and weekend overnight stay programs (this is a priority for most areas) > Market rate and affordable apartments for elder couples where design allows for easily accessible support services (this is simply a design and funding issue) > Long-term care facilities designed for small population nodes (similar to the USA’s Green Home House projects) > Wellness centres for older adults.

How can women help women? As women, we must help change policies and priorities on behalf of our elders. Help create more suitable realities that respond to the variety of our needs. Let’s implement overnight respite programs immediately. Let’s explore the idea of residential projects for couples in need of services, instead of “divorce by nursing home”. I think we could all benefit.

Anne-Marie Pollowy Toliver’s blog can be found at: elderlifeblog.com

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der this Being a great golf course successful in any area of our lives requires a positive mindset and els of players because youhearts to be intentional about what we do. This is a firm decision in our to suit your abilities. especially true in the area of our finances. As women, we tend to hand the area of money in our lives to others, or to ignore it and hope for eaching over method begins the best. analysis of your personal I emphasize fundamentals If you need help – ask for it! Nobody can know it all; we are not islands. There beginner or experienced, is no shame in seeking advice. To be a truly strong and courageous woman, tals determine your we must be in the driver’s seat of our life. Go for it, you can do it! And if there

Dare to dream and write your dreams down.

Declare to yourself every day, “I am a prosperous soul!�

Believe in your ability to be smart about money.

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Make it a goal to pay off your debt in 2013. are people in your life that are saying you can’t do it, then you need to stop Build an emergency fund. Start with whatever ood analyst, you are listeningso to ifthem. you can - even $50 per month. It will add up. rienced but out of practice, Protect yourself and your loved ones – yes, prosperous soul is a contented soul, one who knows how to enjoy good get you “A back to your former I’m talking about insurance. things, who can Then we’ll improve it! take rest and be at leisure, who can dream.� Stephen DeSilva, Don’t use credit. Go on a cash diet. author of Money and the Prosperous Soul. his season with a private or group lesson. (You bring a group or we’ll organizeLive within your means. This may seem challenging at first, but in the end it will get Chambers a Finance Consultant/Insurance Broker and a Facilitator of the Prosperous esign a Anne program forisyou.

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on a daily basis with stories of abuse, abandonment and financial crisis, there were some incredible stories of strength and courage in there too. I realized that we could all do with social support in our lives – whatever our circumstance. And in today’s world with so many women moving away from their home towns and immediate families, that element of knowledge and wisdom handed down from mother to daughter is getting lost.”

Joanna grew up in the Staffordshire town of Stoke-on-Trent, famed for its traditional potteries industry. Following high school she headed for Wales, and a degree course at Swansea University. On graduating she decided it was the right time to travel, and soon set her sights on a city she still holds close to her heart – Toronto.

“I loved living there. I took on a variety of jobs – from working in coffee shops to a stint with the University of Toronto, digitizing books,” she said. “In everything I did, I was struck by the positivity of the city – the “can-do” attitude. The enthusiasm for life, and the way people really believed in each other. After a great year I came back to the UK, but it was that outlook to life that I really missed.”

Fe-line Women

by Jo Thoenes

The university city of Oxford, England is renowned for a number of things. There is the world famous seat of learning that dates back to 1096. There is the auto plant that produces the iconic Mini, and there are landmarks and characters that have been the inspiration for, and have been inspired by, some of the greatest writers of all time. It was in Oxford that Lewis Carroll wrote about a little girl’s adventures in wonderland, and it was at the Oxford pub ‘The Eagle and Child’ (known affectionately as ‘The Bird and Baby’ by locals) that writers J.R.R Tolkien and C.S. Lewis first mulled over tales of Middle Earth and Narnia.

When 29 year old Joanna Woodcock moved to the city, it was neither academia, automobiles nor Alice that she was looking for. Instead, she found that despite its vibrant and dynamic exterior there was something missing in Oxford: a social platform for women like herself who were young, independent and driven. Rather than bemoan that fact, Joanna set out to change it.

“I was working for a women’s group called Platform 51 (platform51. org) and recognised it wasn’t just the vulnerable women we helped who needed a support network,” said Joanna. “Although I was dealing

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Celebrating Women

Joanna wasn’t about to sit around pondering this social difference for too long though. A new job and a new life in Oxford beckoned. But she couldn’t help but still feel a little unfulfilled. This was when the concept of Fe-line Women came up.

“I’d been involved with a couple of networking groups previously, but they weren’t exactly what I was looking for. They largely concentrated on business development but I wanted something more lifestyle-focussed, more inspirational. I wanted to help women grow in all areas of their lives – not just the corporate side of things.

I wanted to offer a fun and supportive environment – one where we would all have the confidence to grow,” Joanna explained. She wanted to avoid the feeling of a ‘Dragon’s Den’ or ‘X-Factor’ approach.

So was launching this concept daunting? What were the challenges?

“I gave myself 12 months to see how the idea would be received, during which I would freelance to earn a living. My longer term aim was to make Fe-line Women my full-time job, but for starters I needed to get a good balance. This past year has taught me so much personally as well as professionally. I am more thrifty. I now realise that there is so much more to life than a big salary.

Fulfilment is a key to success at whatever level you choose it to be.

And there is so much to be gained from seeing other people succeed and grow.”

From its humble beginnings, Fe-line Women continues to grow.

The group holds regular events across Oxford, under three main themes. ‘Word of Mouth’ invites speakers to share their experiences on everything from blogging to emotional well-being. These not only provide glimpses into new worlds, but have been pivotal in the launch of new ventures, with the speakers usually come from within the ranks of the groups membership. ‘Frock and Roll’ has become a style revelation as well as a revolution. Bringing together

cool indie boutiques under one roof for an afternoon of shopping, exchanging and pampering, designers and traders have found it the perfect way to give a new business a leg-up, and older establishments have received the shot in the arm they needed. In turn, shoppers and fashionistas have the chance to find something new and original on a realistic budget. Finally, there is the musical element of the ‘Feel it, Wear it, Hear it’ Fe-line philosophy. The Fe-line Sessions offers a stage for local female musicians to cut their acoustic teeth, and has already garnered interest from the likes of the BBC as a source of the newest and brightest names on the local music scene.

headshots PERSONALITY

Membership is steadily growing, with women of all ages and background joining with one goal in common. Whether they are stay-at-home mums looking to achieve more for themselves in terms of well being or launching a new enterprise, or sassy business women eager to pass on their experiences to the sisterhood, they are all there for each other.

“The plan for 2013,” explained Joanna, “is to grow and to help launch new Fe-line groups across the UK. More events, more locations. I’m no longer driven by others people’s perceptions of worth.

What is more important to me is to understand who I am and how I can be a part of something bigger. And it’s exciting that I’m not the only person feeling that way.” Jo Thoenes is a freelance writer who has worked with the BBC. fe-line.co.uk • facebook.com/Felinewomen

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The House of Many Blessings

by Nancy Rorke

When she attended a birthday party for a South African friend, she found a way to give back. Instead of bringing birthday gifts, guests donated money to an orphanage. Susan adopted the great idea.

Then, six years ago, Susan started a Christmas luncheon for twenty-five of her friends. Instead of bringing her a hostess gift, they voluntarily donated money for a recommended charity.

When Susan talked about her Christmas luncheons, her eyes glowed with joy. Perhaps she had found the key to capturing the Christmas spirit?

A couple of years ago, when Susan vacationed with her friends on the beautiful coast of South Africa, the Canadian women appreciated how lucky they were. Nelson Mandela’s dream of a viable economic future for the African society hadn’t yet materialized.

Susan and her friends wanted to give back to the South African community. They visited IZIBUSISO (House of Many Blessings), a Foster Home for babies up to three years old. The children live in the house until a permanent home is found for them. Most often, their forever home is with an aunt, grandmother, or great-grandmother. Susan and her friends decided to volunteer there.

IZIBUSISO’S House of Many Blessings’s red door, with its ‘baby hatch’.

No matter where she’s lived, Susan Parker has always been involved in the community. When she lived in Toronto, she volunteered for the Kidney Foundation and the Art Gallery of Ontario. When she and her husband Don moved to Dufferin County ten years ago, she began volunteering for the Dufferin Arts Council.

She also organized fundraising events for the Mono Mulmur Coalition.

“I love living here and I can’t imagine living anywhere else,” Susan said. She’s met many wonderful people along the way and attended many interesting and fun events.

Along the way, Susan decided that she had enough trinkets or hostess gifts. “When you reach a certain age, you want to give something back,” she said. Susan felt if she could help make a difference in one person’s life, then she’d have accomplished something.

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Susan felt encouraged by IZIBUSISO’S teenage pregnancy awareness campaign to educate girls about unwanted pregnancies, and to give them options should they become pregnant.

Most of the unwanted or neglected babies arrive undernourished and in poor health. The home provides medical care. Susan and her friends held and comforted them.

Being a retired paediatric nurse, a mother, and a grandmother, with a strong love of children, Susan thought about other ways support IZIBUSISO. She wanted to do more for the babies and the house; she loved the idea of the babies living in a safe home with love and nurturing from a house mother, and that the house employed local African women.

During the Christmas season in 2011, Susan chose IZIBUSISO, as her group charity for that year. Susan especially wanted to aid the house in providing a baby hatch. The hatch is a red door with two hands forming a heart on it. Written and photo instructions explain to the women how to safely leave their babies in the cradle inside the hatch. The weight of the baby sets off an alarm that notifies staff of the baby’s arrival.

Susan felt touched when she heard that twin babies, named Gift and Given by the staff, were dropped off on Christmas Eve. Without the House of Many Blessings, they would never have

survived. With the help of her friends, Susan successfully assisted The House of Many Blessings with a sizable donation.

Susan then decided to direct her luncheon fundraising in Dufferin County. Her 2012 Christmas luncheon was scheduled for December 14, and Susan chose Family Transition Place (FTP) as the recipient of her luncheon donations. Susan and her friends know that safe shelter is provided for women and their children and that FTP offers counselling and legal support. Susan loved the idea of women helping other women. “Only another woman truly understands another woman,” she said.

At the luncheon, laughter, joy, or the spirit of Christmas permeated the room. The women came because, “Women help everyone.

We are the caregivers of the world.” They loved the idea of giving back to the community.

Susan Walley, a memoir teacher, said, “It’s an especially difficult time of the year, and some women don’t have much. I like the

idea of giving back.”

It takes an organized woman to throw a Christmas luncheon, and a woman with a good heart. Susan spends two days cooking for it. She is the ultimate hostess and chef.

Possibly, Susan has found the true spirit of Christmas. There was laughter, joy, and tears at her luncheon, and a wonderful feeling filled Susan’s home. Could it be because the women were helping other women to make a difference?

A couple of days before her luncheon, Susan visited Toronto for another Christmas luncheon…given by her friend…also aimed towards helping other women. Susan is hopeful that by telling her story and sharing her passion for women helping women, she can inspire other people to give and help others in their community and beyond. To learn more about IZIBUSISO visit izibusiso.org. Nancy Rorke is a member of the Headwaters Writers’ Guild.

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IWD Magazine

When you’ve faced challenges in your life, you’ve grown from the experience. you’ve learned something about yourself and about others. If the experience was disempowering – making you feel inferior, small, or diminishing your inner light – the most important lesson to learn is to ‘Take back your Power’. By Debra Jones There isn’t anything that has happened in your life that you cannot heal. When you are still suffering, it’s because there is a part of your power that still remains at the scene of the event. Thankfully, there are ways to heal these traumas, that when left unhealed, can negatively influence you throughout your entire life. Energy healing, safely, gently and lovingly helps you go back and retrieve those parts of you that you left there. The result is that you become whole again – with all of your power intact. The following suggestions can start you on the journey to a place of power. Thankfully, there are ways to heal these traumas, that when left unhealed, can negatively influence you throughout your entire life. Energy healing, safely, gently and lovingly helps you go back and retrieve those parts of you that you left there. The result is that you become whole again – with all of your power intact.

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Celebrating Women

live your life consciously

The following suggestions can start you on the journey to a place of power.

Know your life is important.

Every one of us has an important contribution to make in the world.

If you can’t see your way, there are many lightworkers around, whose purpose is to help you navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters – to be a lighthouse guiding the way to be your Authentic Self. To live the life you were born to live.

Live your life consciously.

You are the author of your life. You hold the pen. What adventures, what stories, what opportunities will you write in for yourself? Who gets written into your stories, and who gets written

out? What old beliefs (that no longer serve you) get replaced with new beliefs? What are your new beliefs?

Keep a journal.

It can help you get out of your own head, and help you see life more clearly. You can use it to record how you’re feeling, but you can also use it to write in your wishes for the future. When you are clear on what you want, the Universe can find ways to give it to you.

Use affirmations.

Affirmations are a powerful way to manifest a better life, one that is more in alignment with who you really are. Affirmations are positive statements that, by stating them repeatedly, can

begin to manifest in your life.

Choose one, or create one of your own, and post it on sticky notes all around your house.

Affirmations work by replacing negative self-talk with positive.

All beliefs are just thoughts that we think over and over.

If you’ve ever felt disempowered, the simple choice to Take Back Your Power can heal the mind, body and spirit. No matter what you have experienced, you can change your life for the better.

choose a new thought and change your life I trust my inner voice.

I am strong, wise and powerful.

I move beyond old limitations and express myself freely and creatively.

I speak up for myself with ease.

It’s okay to make noise.

I forgive myself and now choose to support myself in loving, caring ways.

Focus on road trips, not market dips.

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IWD Magazine

LYN ALLEN – 26 YEARS OF HELPING WOMEN Manager of Residential & Outreach Services

In this quickening time of 15-second media bites, short-term contracts and terminating relationships, it is astonishing to meet a woman who has given the last 26 years of her life to a single organization. However, when you really get to know Lyn Allen, you find this kind of commitment is part of who she is. By Kathryn MacDuffee I asked Lyn, “why Family Transition Place?”

LA: I work with amazing people. The staff and volunteers are so competent and hard working. They demonstrate compassion and kindness every day – to our clients and to each other. They are committed individuals. Together they do immensely hard work in a way that often looks easy because they believe in it. They want a world where there is mutual respect and equality and work tirelessly towards that end.

And the women, children and men who access our services inspire and motivate me. They are survivors! I learn from them every day about resiliency and courage and taking one step at a time. I am challenged to want to help them and to make the world a better place for them. Where else other than Family Transition Place would I love the work so much, enjoy the people, feel respected, be constantly challenged and learn new things every single day after 26 years?

Km: Is all of the above the reason you chose this field?

LA: I knew that my real interest was working with women…and vulnerable women in particular. I thought perhaps a rape crisis centre working with victims of sexual assault…or a counselling 24

Celebrating Women

centre for women experiencing abuse…or a crisis line…or a legal clinic. Little did I know that at Family Transition Place I would be getting it all. I started as a half time Residential Counsellor and half time Legal Support Counsellor.

Km: If I were to call one of your co-workers, what would they say about you?

LA: Check the bulletin board above my desk – that sheet with my name on it will tell you exactly what people have said about me.

I ‘live life to the fullest’; I am ‘a supportive and strong leader’; I am ‘a whirlwind of passion and efficiency’; I’m a terrific role model, and ‘an inspiring, strong woman, genuine, authentic and beautiful’. They said I think outside the box and on my toes and that I’m competent and open, and fun and thoughtful. One person said that they would hate to do this work without me.

Km: What have you accomplished that makes you proudest?

LA: Being a good mom to my son and daughter. At 19 and 15 they are amazing human beings. I feel incredibly blessed to have them in my life. Over the years they have grounded me, challenged me and motivated me. We have travelled, ocean-snorkelled, kayaked, ‘aqua zorbed’, and learned new things together.

We have cried together and laughed to the point where we couldn’t breathe!

We work on our ‘life’s list’ together – camping in the middle of February…in a snowstorm…in a tent! Cliff jumping (and by that I mean that they have jumped off the cliff and I have cheered them on while cringing and going limp in the knees watching them!). The best moments are where we just share stories and thoughts about our day and about life. The two of them keep

me going on bad days and inspire me to be the best I can be on all the other days.

Km: What are you passionate about?

LA: As cliché as it may sound I am passionate about LIFE and living it to the fullest. I have never been one to sit on the sidelines…except of course when it comes to cliff jumping.

I am passionate about raising wonderful kids. I am passionate about doing important work that makes a difference, and doing it with integrity. . . about being a good person who

admits mistakes, treats people fairly, is open to change and learning and challenges, and believe me, there’ve been a lot over the past 26 years.

I am passionate about travelling and experiencing the world and the people in it. And about pushing myself and never being content with the ‘status quo’. I’m passionate about a kinder, gentler world in 2013. Oh, and I’m deeply passionate about chocolate!

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First out of the gate... and across the finish line.

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Some people are blessed with strong constitutions. They eat what they like, drink, smoke, don’t exercise, never take supplements and hardly ever get sick.

These genetically strong individuals however, are becoming increasingly rare.

by Kathy Shackleton, RHN, RNCP, Nutritionist What Should I Look For in Supplements?

Sourcing and shopping for supplements can be mind boggling. Natural practitioners (Nutritionists and Naturopaths) can assist you with appropriate choices. Shopping at a Natural or Health Food Store is also a good option. Trained and qualified staff will be able to assist you. Organic, naturally sourced and food state are qualities to look for.

A high quality Probiotic is worthwhile; since 70 per cent or more of our body’s immune cells are in the digestive tract. Probiotics or good bacteria will help digestion and immune function. Optimal digestion is key to absorbing and assimilating our food, which is a good thing!

Vitamin D3 at least 1000 IU daily, the “sunshine vitamin”, supports the immune system, bones and muscles. Low Vitamin D levels are linked to depression, diabetes, weight problems and hypertension.

Calcium Magnesium with all the co-factors for absorption and assimilation, (including potassium, zinc, boron, Vitamin D3 & Vitamin K2). Osteoporosis is becoming very common; maintaining and building bone density is important. Magnesium also supports heart health and is known as the anti-stress mineral.

SUPPLEMENT YOUR DAY top 6 supplements for women’s healthy living Top 6 Supplements for Women This is a very general guide, and not suitable for everyone; we are all individuals with unique DNA, lifestyles and in some cases, pre-existing health issues.

It is important that your primary care physician (MD or ND) be aware of all supplements that you are taking or that you are considering. If you take prescription medications, discuss supplements with your pharmacist. Supplements and drugs do not always mix well. Take your supplements as directed on the bottle. Supplements cannot take the place of a nutrient dense diet. Ensure you are getting protein with every meal, whole grains, lots of colourful fruits and vegetables, and healthy fats.

Omega 3’s for your heart, joints, brain and nervous system.

Omegas are essential fatty acids; the body needs them but does not produce them, so supplementation is necessary.

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Celebrating Women

A Multi-Vitamin/Mineral combo is a good foundation for all women; there are age specific formulas for the various stages of life. Good for overall maintenance.

B Vitamins support the nervous system, contribute to healthy hair and skin, and may help with hormonal balance.

If the stress level is high, a B Complex formula would be beneficial. Vitamin B6 is known as the anti-stress vitamin.

B Vitamins also nourish the adrenal or stress glands. The adrenals take over for the ovaries during peri-menopause, so strong adrenals = an easy transition to menopause.

Why Should I Take Supplements?

Our food is not as nutrient dense as it once was. The food industry is global and not all countries have the same standards as ours for agriculture and food processing.

Our food supply also includes herbicides, pesticides, soil depletion, food irradiation, GMO’s and environmental pollution. Lifestyles can be busy and stressful, leaving little time for cooking from scratch with healthy ingredients; instead we eat processed foods that lack nutrition.

Add in lots of coffee, alcohol consumption, smoking, the list goes on and on. And finally, most of us do not eat completely organic.

We can use a little help from supplements!

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Authors and researchers who provide information of interest to women and health include: Dr. Christiane Northrup Caroline Dupont, Nutritionist Lorna Vanderhaeghe

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Patti

Congratula

tions to

FFoley oleey ol

Family Transition P on a succes lace s

Regional Councillor Bolton Ward 5

& inspiringful 3nd Annual

Internation Women’s D al ay Luncheon

(905) 951-6128 patti.foley@caledon.ca www.pattifoleyward5.com

The Town of Orangeville is proud to participate in Family Transition Place’s International Women’s Day celebration and proclaims:

March 8, 2013 International Women’s Day The Town encourages all residents and organizations to join us in our sesquicentennial celebrations throughout the year!

Make history today and celebrate Orangeville! www.orangeville150.ca 29

Celebrating Women

by Sabina Greenley – one of FTP’s team of talented Youth Educators. The I’M GIRL program is one of seven individual programs offered to elementary and secondary schools in Caledon and Dufferin.

Last school year, 150 of these programs helped increase self-esteem and decrease bullying and aggressive behaviours in over 3,000 of our youth. I’M GIRL is one of two gender-specific groups (BreakThru for Boys) that is offered during nutritional breaks or lunch periods to students that want a more focussed opportunity to explore issues in a small group. Recent data gleaned from a newly implemented and scientifically reliable evaluation process shows that in most I’M GIRL groups, self-esteem has increases 11% by the end of the 8 week program!

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” – Alice Walker Young girls face immense pressure today. Pressure to be thin. Pressure to be smart but not too smart. Pressure to be caring and compassionate but not weak. Pressure to be themselves but to not stand out from the crowd. For many girls today it feels like pressure to be perfect. Family Transition Place’s Youth Educators have witnessed it all.

In the I’M GIRL group, girls’ struggles range from eating disorders to self-harming. The girls feel powerless in their attempts to live up to the ideal image perpetuated by the media and often reinforced by many people in their lives.

This is where the I’M GIRL group often begins. I’M GIRL often starts tentatively with many girls so unsure of their choices they often doubt the one that brought to the group in the first place. They look around the room and see the faces of people they don’t really know and wonder how they can possibly understand what they are going through. But this changes over time as the girls play games, have fun and get permission to be something they

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Celebrating Women

often aren’t – themselves. The group guidelines provide an atmosphere of non-judgement, acceptance and positive affirmation. The activities often break down barriers and open up dialogue on the pressures and adversity each girl faces in their lives. The facilitator acts as a road map but it’s really the girls who guide the journey. While there is a curriculum of topics, it’s the girls themselves who determine what is covered.

During I’M GIRL, the girls begin to discover the power within themselves but also the power of girls and women standing together. They support each other during the open discussion of weekly worries and events. They are the ones who offer encouragement when one of their own is struggling. And it’s the girls who create the memorable keepsakes for each other that often act as lifelines for them after the group has ended. These keepsakes come in the form of wallet sized cards that have the participant’s name on along with all the positive and wonderful attributes that their new friends have discovered about them.

It’s not uncommon many years later to see a girl with a tattered and bent card still at the front of her wallet as a memento of their time in the group and as a reminder of who they truly are.

As each girl is different so too is each I’M GIRL group.

There are different issues to discuss and different personalities to work with. But there is one constant within each and every group, and that’s hope. Every girl has it by the end of their journey. They have hope for a life of their own making and they are truly excited to start building. They have hope that they are truly good enough the way they are and that they don’t have to change for anyone.

This hope is reflected in their enthusiasm and in their comments.

“I now like me for me and I know I am important.”

“I am proud of myself and respect who I am.”

“I loved meeting new people and making new good friends.”

“The group was a place I could express myself – thank you.”

“I feel like a lot of the problems I had are gone. Life feels so much better.” – I’M GIRL participants

There is sadness when I’M GIRL is over because it has meant so much to so many in the group. But the true beauty of the group is that it never really ends. It carries on in the new relationships that were built, and continue to grow in the weeks and months that follow. The positive feelings continue in the new found acceptance that each girl has for themselves. As the girls learn in the group, it’s much easier to accept others when you first accept yourself. Building a community full of empowered and confident women is the goal of the I’M GIRL Program. It’s a community many people would aspire to be a part of. Based on the young girls who graduate from I’M GIRL, I know it’s a true possibility. I also know that the I’M GIRLs won’t accept anything less.

Sylvia JoneS, MPP 244 Broadway, Orangeville 12596 Regional Road 50, Bolton 1-800-265-1603 www.sylviajonesmpp.ca

Working For You!

The I’m Girl program is unfunded. If you would like to support this intitative, please contact Family Transition Place at admin@familytransitionplace.ca

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“Never doubt that a small group of committed people can change the world. It’s the only thing that ever has.” - Margaret Mead

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An excellent working relationship. by Kim Hayes

From a practical viewpoint, the environments of many developing worlds are harsh and unforgiving. There is little food – for people or animals – and water is scarce. The minimal resources available must be strictly rationed, so any animals living in these environments must be able to survive with minimal help from humans. Donkeys are perfectly adapted to these environments. In looking at modern donkeys’ origins, we can trace their ancestral home to the deserts of North Africa. The desert created hardy creatures able to subsist on small amounts of poor quality food.

In addition to their hardiness, donkeys have many qualities that make them ideal partners for women in particular. Just in terms of brute strength, a donkey can carry three times what a woman can carry on her own, reducing the amount of physical effort needed and the time required for the work. The donkey’s small size makes it easy for women to lift loads onto their backs, and their gentle natures make them easy for anyone to handle, even a child.

Modern stereotypes of donkeys have contributed to the negative, or perhaps even worse, indifferent attitudes toward donkeys – an unfair and undeserved fate for an animal with a long history of service to humans. Donkeys were the first animals to be domesticated for agricultural work, and archaeological evidence suggests a relationship going back more than 6000 years. Even so, there seems to be a deep misunderstanding about donkeys’ natures.

The most prevalent and enduring misconception is that donkeys are stubborn. It serves people well, however, to think about what was

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Celebrating Women

This approach to their world means that donkeys need to want to do what’s being asked of them. If they don’t understand what’s being asked, or feel a particular action is unsafe or not in their interest, they will refuse to do it. Is that stubborn, or smart? Many people assign the label ‘stubborn’, because the donkeys aren’t doing what they’re told. Attempts to force compliance only result in the donkey digging in deeper or distancing themselves from the situation, and a vicious cycle of frustration and abuse begins.

For women involved in abusive relationships, this may sound all too familiar. It’s strange to think that women and donkeys are alike, and perhaps it’s a bit of a stretch to think we have much in common.

However, it’s certainly true that donkeys respond best to a gentle, patient approach, and this is something women respond to as well.

When a partnership is forged from this foundation, donkeys will actively seek out the company of their humans. As long as the requests are manageable and safe, donkeys will willingly work hard alongside their human partners.

Their work may never be done, but in developing worlds, women and donkeys working together can improve each other’s lives significantly. These strong, gentle and intelligent animals have demonstrated their willingness to help humans throughout history, and given a chance, will continue to do so for a long time to come. Kim Hayes is the Operations Manager at the Donkey Sanctuary of Canada N.B. I would like to thank Peta Jones, who has done much to further the welfare of donkeys, and thereby the people who rely on them for their subsistence, in developing worlds. Her book, Donkeys for Development, is a manual for using the materials at hand to make harnesses, build balanced plow or cart hitches, and provide the medical care required to keep donkeys healthy. Donkeys for Development provided the inspiration for this article.

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Women plough fields, carry water to their homes, and transport goods to market. There’s another saying to describe these jobs: “donkey work”. In places where women are responsible for these tasks, donkeys are valuable assistants.

necessary for donkeys adapting to living in a harsh climate. In their natural environments, donkeys must be independent; their survival depends on it. Because the climate won’t support large herds, each donkey must be able to look out for itself, and expending unnecessary effort can mean the difference between life and death.

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A woman’s work is never done.

Although almost every woman can identify with this statement, it’s even truer in developing countries, where women do the bulk of farming and domestic tasks required for their families’ survival.

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The Self-Nurtured Woman

W h a t i s a S e l f - N u r t u r e d Wo m a n ?

When a woman loves herself, she is invested in taking the best care of herself. She knows the importance of putting herself first in order to become a better mother, a better partner, and a better human being. When a woman takes time to exhale, to nurture her body, and to re-connect with herself, she becomes an empowered, fulfilled, and happier woman.

She flourishes into a powerful, secure, and satisfied woman. Because of the love and care she has given to herself, she has more to give to others. When she understands this concept of self-care, she evolves as a person. Women who nurture themselves are

A fast-paced, stressful, un-nurturing lifestyle is far from healthy, yet society continues to normalize this way of living. Women in particular are often expected to take care of everything and everyone, leaving virtually no time to take care of themselves. by Dr. Sara Celik It’s no wonder women commonly report symptoms of fatigue, depression, and pain – this is simply a clever way in which their body communicates to them to slow down. If a woman desires balance, optimal health, and fulfillment in her life, a paradigm shift is mandatory. It is time for women to start listening to their inner voice that is crying for better care, before they find themselves burnt-out, depleted, unbalanced, and resentful. Let’s review four steps that will assist a woman in shifting from a place of depletion to a place of fulfillment, satisfaction, and inner strength.

Step 1: Making herself a priority

Eating out and skipping meals is not a self-nurturing practice. The selfnurtured woman takes time to eat a balanced diet that consists of nutrient-

better able to help and nurture others.

dense, whole foods. She consumes loads of dark green leafy vegetables like kale and spinach, and chooses tasty complex carbohydrates such as brown rice, quinoa and sweet potatoes. Good sources of protein with every meal and snack are essential and alcohol should be limited to four alcoholic drinks per week. The self-nurtured woman replaces sugar-filled lattes with detoxifying white tea and is mindful of what she puts into her body. Recognizing that exercise releases feel-good hormones called endorphins, she is committed to regular physical activity.

Step 2: Reprogramming her thoughts The self-nurtured woman

understands that her thoughts shape her life. She sends her body loving thoughts throughout the day, and only engages in actions that support her health and personal goals. There is no place for judgment in her life and she accepts herself for who she is. Yoga is an excellent practice that can re-program limiting beliefs, along with improving flexibility, strength, and body composition. It has even been described as medicine for the soul. The self-nurtured woman may practice yoga to relax and connect with herself or she may prefer to meditate at home in an

area that is peaceful and comforting. Either way, she recognizes the importance of calming her hyperactive mind, reciting her positive affirmations daily, and staying true to her authentic, loving self.

Step 3: Balancing Her Hormones

Women are commonly described as deeply sensitive, moody, and unstable.

However, most of these women are simply depleted, exhausted, and dealing with a hormonal imbalance.

Thankfully, there are many natural ways to balance erratic hormones, which can have a mind of their own. Many women have been able to manage their hormones naturally without the use of synthetic hormones by taking botanical formulas along with a high quality multi-vitamin, omega-3- fatty acids, B vitamins, calcium-magnesium, and zinc. Since women are over-exposed to hormones in their food, their polluted environment, their choice of contraception, and their personal care products, I encourage all women over 30 to invest in saliva hormone testing with a Naturopathic Doctor. This test helps uncover hormonal imbalances and women are given the opportunity to address any issues sooner rather than later. >> step 4 33

IWD Magazine

Step 4: Cleansing Physical and Emotional Toxins Numerous stud-

ies have demonstrated that physical toxins have multiple negative effects on the body, and can lead to all sorts of conditions. In order to stay young and healthy, these physical toxins need

to be gently removed from the liver and other vital organs at least twice per year. A complete cleanse not only involves eating clean and taking detoxifying herbs, it also challenges a woman to let go of emotional toxins that are not supportive of her good

health. Chemicals, stress, and holding onto past trauma all have a negative effect on a woman’s mental and physical well-being. By Dr. Sara Celik.

Dr. Sara is naturopathic doctor and detox expert based in Toronto.

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At Sprout, we’re fond of growing things. Particularly, businesses.

How can we help your business grow? From print to web to social media to broadcast, we can write, art direct and design beautiful and effective materials to advertise your business or product.

Let’s grow something wonderful! sproutadanddesign.com 519.942.2207 or sprout@ sproutadanddesign.com

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Roto-Mill Inc. is a proud supporter in the Orangeville Community.

Roto-Mill, a construction company specializing in asphalt road reclamation, recycling, asphalt milling, concrete scarifying and rumble strip alert warning systems. At nearly 35 years in business across Ontario, Nova Scotia and New Brunswick, they moved their head office to Orangeville in 2007. They are proud to be a leader in the community by supporting many not-forprofit and youth initiatives.

560 Riddell Rd., Orangeville L9W 5H3 519.941.7686 or info@ rotomill.ca

Come visit the donkeys at the Donkey Sanctuary of Canada.

We’re open Wednesdays and Sundays, 10 am - 4 pm, from May to October. Meet the donkeys, pack a lunch and have a picnic, bring your hiking shoes for the trail - and enjoy a day with us.

Yoga Shala: proud to be Caledon’s new Yoga & Wellness studio.

Doors open mid-March!

Offering Ashtanga (Power), Hatha and Yin yoga, in a warm, tranquil space.

Classes suitable for all.

Yes, even for absolute beginners! Practice room features infrared heat and cork floors. Change rooms with heated floors and showers.

We all look forward to your visit - including the donkeys.

Enjoy conversation, complimentary tea in our lounge or come for a massage.

thedonkeysanctuary.ca 519.836.1697 or info@ thedonkeysanctuary.ca

yogashalacaledon.com info@yogashalacaledon.com

Royal LePage RCR Realty is Proud to Support International Women’s Day!

Royal LePage RCR Realty is also a proud supporter of The Royal LePage Shelter Foundation, Canada’s largest public foundation dedicated exclusively to funding women’s shelters and violence prevention and education programs.

Thinking of making a move? Visit us online for great tips & helpful Royal LePage RCR Realty has 19 Offices with over 400 REALTORS to serve you better, including information on Buying or Selling your next home or property!

Orangeville Office 519.941.5151 or 1.800.268.2455

75 First Street, Suite 14, Orangeville, ON L9W 2E7

Bolton/Caledon Office 905.857.0651 Shelburne Office

519.925.2761

Alliston Office

705.435.3000

Orangeville, Bolton, Shelburne & Alliston!

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