How to deal with cyber-bullying

Today’s children are so immersed in the digital world that over half of them accept cyber-bullying as part of life, according to a survey commissioned by the Anti-Bullying Alliance (anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk).

Particularly invasive, cyber-bullying can be distressing because victims feel the bullies have access to them at all times.

Cyber-bullying is the use of electronic communication, be it phone, tablet or computer, to send messages of an intimidating or threatening nature. And it is not a trivial matter as some children can be subjected to prolonged online bullying campaigns that they feel they can’t escape.

‘Victims of cyber-bullying can find it hard to open up to their parents’, explains psychologist Dr. Linda Papadopoulos, an ambassador for Internet Matters (internetmatters.org) cyberbullying campaign. ‘But it’s vital that parents learn how to engage with their children in a positive and reassuring way to open a dialogue channel which youngsters can feel reassured, not intimidated by.’

So what can you do if you suspect your child is being cyber-bullied?

Look for the signs

If bullying is going on there will be changes in your child’s normal behaviour. These could include: becoming secretive about what they are doing on the computer, keeping their mobile on silent, spending a lot of time in their bedroom, showing signs of anxiety, irritability and moodiness and being quieter than usual. They may suffer stomach aches, headaches and sleeping difficulties and if bullying is prolonged, there may be a deterioration in school work and a reluctance to go to school.

Talk it out

You need to talk to your child about cyber-bullying. Explain that if they are being bullied online they need to talk to you, a teacher or another adult they trust. Tell them they can call

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ChildLine free on 0800 1111 if they would rather not tell someone they know; they have trained counsellors who regularly deal with this issue and know how to advise.

Don’t react

Never reply to messages sent by a bully, even in anger as it will usually make the bullying worse. Bullies want a reaction, that’s why they do it.

Save and log

Save any messages, texts or online comments, along with when they were sent and any details you have about the sender. Screen shots also mean that the evidence is visible. This information will be very useful when reporting the bullying.

Block and check profiles

Social networks have different ways of dealing with bullies. On Facebook, for example, users can remove tags and block people who are sending nasty messages. Abusive posts or groups can be reported anonymously to Facebook, to get them taken down. Setting profiles to ‘friends only’ means your child can’t be accessed by people he or she doesn’t know. On other social networks you could also try changing their online user ID or nickname.

Change your child’s number

If your child is being bullied by text or phone calls, have their mobile number changed and tell them not to give out the number to anyone they don’t know or trust.

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Anti-Bullying Week will take place from Monday 13 to Friday 17 November. With thanks to < TheSchoolRun.com for this article. Visit their site for worksheets, activities and learning games for EYFS, KS1 and KS2, including English, maths and science advice for parents and SATs past papers. Call 07827680383