May 2024: Close to Home. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA)

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FA Stories of Recovery from Food Addiction

May 2024 $2.50

Close to Home

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May 2024

Columns Qualification: Confronting Bulimia. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1 No Matter What: Open Sea Adventure. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 Notable and Quotable . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .17

Features Full Circle. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 The Courage to Date. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 Less is More. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8 A Call for Help. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Beginning To Heal. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12

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Glossary of Terms FA: Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous AA: Alcoholics Anonymous AWOL: A Way of Life, a study of the Twelve Steps Big Book: Alcoholics Anonymous 1 Stone = 14 pounds 1 Kilo = approx. 2.2 pounds Copyright © 2024 Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous 400 W. Cummings Park, Suite 1700 Woburn, MA 01801-6572

Qualification

Confronting Bulimia

A

bout 12 years ago, I lost all control around food. As an American Sign Language interpreter, I interpreted for a deaf high school student in a home economics class. One day, all the students were making meals from different cultures, and I ate everything, including the gluten products, which I had avoided for more than 20 years. My stomach hurt, and I threw up. After this episode, if I became anxious over something or emotionally sad or triggered, I would throw up. My stomach would get upset, and it would just happen; I didn’t force it.

During this time, I went to a family gathering and roomed with my sister. I threw up that night. I felt so embarrassed and humiliated. Maybe it was a blocked colon, I thought, and not an emotional upset. I got a colonoscopy, but nothing was found. I did an ultrasound, and nothing was found.

Surely, I am not bulimic! I am not forcing this to happen. How can that be? Denial is a sacred defense mechanism. It was mine for years. It works until it does not work, until I had enough.

In 2015, I was at work, and I could not eat all my lunch. I ate very little, in fact. On my Connection

way home after visiting a friend that evening, I went to the emergency room. I was admitted for a blocked colon. My small intestine was twisted.

After that, I remained abstinent from purging for three years without any TwelveStep program until a fateful day in 2018. Because of emotional upsets from several things that happened in the same week, I binged. I ate three sugar and flour items and was ready for the fourth. I could not stop eating. I felt out of control. I began going down the emotional roller coaster. I purged. I got scared. I called someone in FA. I had gone to a local FA meeting two years earlier, and I said, “Nothing doing. I am not going to do all that weighing and measuring and phone calls.” This time I was desperate.

I felt out of control. Usually, when I binged, I was able to stop. But for the first time, it was impossible. Eating and purging, I had gone beyond any control.

So, I decided to go to an FA meeting on the Monday before Thanksgiving in 2018.

When I entered the meeting and heard the shares, I knew I was home. I had the gift of desperation. The third tradition states, “The only requirement for FA membership is a 1

talked with her about this, and we changed the amount of food I was eating. I was not used to those quantities at one time. Before FA, sometimes I would restrict my eating.

During recovery, when I felt anxious, I could feel the effect on my colon, even if it was hours after a meal. I went into fear of purging. An emotional upset would trigger me.

MEREDITH M., ME

desire to stop eating addictively.” For me, when I stepped into the rooms this time, I knew I belonged.

I found my sponsor that week and she happened to live in my hometown. She gave me a maintenance food plan since I was already at my appropriate weight, but it was too much food. I felt myself wanting to purge. I

I would pray to keep abstinent. I would breathe and tell myself, “I am safe.”

For four years, I did my phone calls, quiet time, meetings, and other tools. I always had to pray to get the phone calls in because I tend to be an introvert. However, one day, I decided to let the tool of telephone slide. I just decided if I could get one phone call in, it would be okay. I did this for a week. And then it happened. I hit a new bottom.

I was at work, and I was beginning to feel nauseous with gas and bloating. The nausea was escalating. I have irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). When my nerves get out of whack from emotions and stress, it exacerbates the IBS, which causes bloating and eventually purging. I was scared. I contacted my sponsor. She did not answer. I made another outreach call to an FA friend who serves as my temporary sponsor when my sponsor is not available. She said, “Get on your knees and pray. You are safe. Your Higher Power is with you.” When I got off the phone, my obsession and emotions continued to escalate. Feeling the impulse to purge, I knew I was in big trouble. How do I stop this possibility of purging? I did not want to break my abstinence. I had eaten my dinner two hours earlier. It was my emotions.

The struggle continued between the addiction and my healthy recovery. I kept praying for help. Help me keep my abstinence. I was Connection

losing it. I felt if I did not do something quick, I’d purge.

I called my first sponsor from when I lived in California. I said, “I am in big trouble. I feel I am going to purge, and I am scared. I don’t want to.” Hearing her voice helped me to breathe. Her Higher Power was coming through when I could not reach mine. My stomach began to calm down. My IBS was relaxing. She agreed to stay on the phone with me as long as I needed. As I talked with her, I realized my bulimia is about a desire to purge emotions. She was by my side on the phone. Feeling her support, I relaxed, and the anxiety lessened. I asked if she would stay on the phone with me until I got home. She did, and I thanked her with deep gratitude.

“You are my angel tonight,” I said. “You did this for me two weeks ago when I needed a friend,” she replied. I remained abstinent.

Today, I am diligent in making phone calls, and I continue to use my other tools. The phone calls, I realized, are a priority, as they keep me humble and grateful.

Until I could accept my bulimia, I could not stay abstinent. Recovery has taught me that when I deal with feelings, I tend to know myself and others much better. I no longer need to push my feelings down with food or purge them out. Bulimia is part of my addiction, and to know this about myself is humbling.

Liz L., Maryland, US 3

W

Full Circle

hy does one leave FA after 20 years of abstinence? FA carried me through some very hard times. This program saw me through 9/11 when I worked at the World Trade Center. A few years later, I dealt with the deaths of three very close family members.

My daughter was diagnosed with gastrointestinal cancer at age 26. My sponsor was amazing. She visited me in New York from the Boston area to help organize medical supplies that I needed for my daughter. I was taken care of. Sadly, my daughter passed two months later. Still, I remained abstinent and committed to my recovery.

I moved to the suburbs right after my daughter died. There were too many memories of our lives together. About two months later, I traveled to Australia to visit with fellows there. Again, I was carried through a difficult time.

When I returned from Australia, I decided to learn to ride a motorcycle. My then-partner had recently been in a crash, and it was at that time I became committed to riding my own bike. I wanted a sense of control, I suppose. I had the time of my life!

It was just about the only time I wasn’t overwhelmed by the pain of losing my daughter. I could lose myself on the road. I 4

made many rider friends and had lots of places to go and lots of places to eat. I maintained my abstinence for another six years.

After a while, I made the unfortunate decision that I could eat like my friends.

Often, we would meet at noon and not stop to eat until between 2:00 and 4:00 pm.

I carried my food with me, certain I could work my FA program and still hang around with my riding buddies. That lasted for a year. I still worked my tools, called my sponsor, took quiet time, weighed and measured my food, and made phone calls every day. However, though I had been in FA for 19 years, I got some crazy notion that I could live this recovery without the usual suggested meal times. I didn’t want to be different. I wanted to be part of the group, and if that meant lunch at 3:00 PM, so be it.

I continued to eat weighed and measured meals for about a year. As I got cocky, I started eating meal replacement bars. I knew better, yet my motorcycle riding became more important than working my program. It wasn’t long before my eating was out of control. I remained faithful to my riding and new friends but not to my recovery. I ate my way through the pandemic and gained 30 pounds in about May 2024

three years.

Just after Thanksgiving last year, I realized my eating was out of control. I was just ending my relationship with the man who crashed his bike three years earlier. What a toxic relationship that was!

I called an FA member who I had known for many years, and my conversation went like this. “My life is unmanageable, and my eating is out of control.” I was at Step One. She didn’t have time to sponsor so she recommended someone who could. I committed to a phone call seven days a week, followed a food plan, resumed all my tools, and joined an AWOL immediately. Already knowing the ins and outs of the program, it was easy for me to return to FA and all the disciplines that had worked so well for all those years.

In July, I sold my motorcycle, giving up the very pleasurable activity that carried me for so long. I was afraid I would lose the friends I made during my 11 years of ridConnection

ing, but a close riding friend told me that since I left FA, I was a different person, and that she liked me better when I was abstinent.

The fear that I would be without my friends completely dissipated. I realized I didn’t need many acquaintances, just a few real friends. They would support me in my abstinence and respect my commitment to the FA program.

Funny how that worked for me. The very thing that took me out was the fear of not being able to ride and hang out with my friends. The very thing that brought me back to this program was those same friends, even without my motorcycle.

My bike and biker buddies were the MARLEE D., CA biggest contributing factors to my decision to leave FA. Letting go of my bike and the friendships with my biker buddies is what brought me back.

I’ve come full circle.

Roe B., New Jersey, US 5

The Courage to Date

I

was in FA for seven years before I was willing to date at a level higher than meeting up for a walk or coffee. I had seen several FA fellows break or leave FA altogether when they started in relationships. Looking back, I had known even more fellows who successfully dated and started relationships abstinently. However, I dismissed those stories in favor of my subconscious fear and distrust of men in general.

In addition to being an isolator, I was a masterful avoider. It isn’t like I could avoid all of life’s hard, scary, or challenging times in those first seven years of abstinence. I had remained abstinent through all those hardships, but I opted to shun dating altogether despite completing multiple AWOLs and growing significantly in my spiritual connection.

Eventually I moved to a new city and 6

started going to in-person AA meetings and met a gentleman who invited me to coffee. It was just coffee, so I accepted. We exchanged phone numbers, and he called (didn’t do the usual texting) several times leading up to our coffee date, and we ended up talking for a few hours during the date.

Since we met in the rooms of recovery, we spoke openly of our recovery journeys, as we both had experienced multiple addictions.

Later that evening, he called and invited me to VICTORIA D., VT AA’s Gratitude Banquet. I immediately wanted to say no as this was typically my cue to exit, but I remember my sponsor encouraging me to pray for the willingness to be willing to date again. I don’t think I ever actually prayed that prayer, but instead of saying no, I said I had to check my calendar. I frantically called my sponsor to get her guidance on what to do. I knew I really May 2024

did need to stop running and hiding every time things got uncomfortable around men.

My sponsor said that if this man wanted to date me, he was going to have to date my food plan, and the sooner he realized that, the better. She assured me that the worst-case scenario was that if he challenged my abstinence in any way, it would be my cue that he was not a good fit, and I had her approval to cut and run. She gave me the confidence to face the fear of at least trying to coordinate a date that would include food I was sure would not be in my meal plan.

I called him back and said that I was free that evening but that I didn’t think the food would meet my needs. He nonchalantly replied, “Oh, we can just show up for the speakers then. The food is never any good anyway.” We met at my house and had an abstinent meal together before going to the Gratitude Banquet.

Our first meal together did not go seamlessly. In a bout of excitement, his dog jumped up and snagged a mouthful of cooked vegetables off my plate and then spit it out when he realized it was not the type of food he was used to. I silently reminded myself that less was more. Because we did not attend the meal portion of the banquet, we had to sit on uncomfortable seating in the back. My date was disappointed that he missed out on the Connection

dessert table since we did not have the meal-option tickets.

All and all, we had a nice enough time for him to ask me out again and for me to accept. The following year we were still together. This time, I found the flier to the Gratitude Banquet that listed the menu, and it looked like there would be food I could eat. We purchased meal tickets and attended the full banquet. Although the food was abstinent, the portions were small. Once again, I got to silently remind myself that less is more and be assured no one starved to death between meals. My date was disappointed in the meal but grateful for the dessert table. I was grateful to be abstinent and not feel hungry even if my brain wanted to protest at the minute amounts of food.

Our relationship hasn’t been all kissy emojis and roses. In four years, we have dealt with multiple medical and emotional issues. As two “militantly” single and independent individuals, we have had to learn to be a couple. As two self-centered addicts, we had to learn to think of each other. For me, I continue to learn to stay in the relationship and not run and hide whenever it gets uncomfortable and hard. I learned that I could set boundaries and have those boundaries be respected.

I also learned that if someone wants to date me, they have to date my food plan.

Karen W., Washington, US 7

love my uneventful life” is a favorite statement of mine in FA. My life is not boring or limited in any way, but over the last 25 years, abstinence has nearly eliminated the drama that constantly surrounded me. Though I no longer create drama in recovery, sometimes things do happen, and I’m better prepared to manage them when they do.

One morning, I started with quiet time as usual but hung up early from my first sponsee call because I kept getting distracted by noises outside. It sounded like my husband was leaving much earlier than expected. We had a foster child at that time, and he wouldn’t have left without

talking to me about getting her to school.

The noises turned out to be a man trying to steal my husband’s car!

I told my husband and then called 911.

My husband ran out, pulled the car door open, and started yelling at the man to leave. I don’t know what the man was on, but he was flipping out in the car and was so high that he couldn’t figure out how to put the car in gear. I was still on the phone with 911, waiting for a sheriff ’s car to respond, when the man put the car in drive rather than reverse and ran my husband’s car into our house, hitting the wall behind the room where I sit for quiet time. My husband was video recording the entire

ANGIE R., NY

“I

Less is More

incident, despite my repeated requests that he come back into the house.

After all the sheriffs and troopers left, I told my husband I wanted to see the video. I hadn’t been able to see much from my spot inside and I was curious. I mentioned this several times in the following days but never made a point of getting hold of his phone. I thought I just kept forgetting, but it finally came to me— knowing myself and how easily I can pick up fear in my usually undramatic life, why would I ever want to look at that video?

The situation was scary enough from my angle so, from his, it could have only been worse. I had already been trying to push away thoughts of what could have happened, but thankfully didn’t.

When I heard people in FA say, “I have a sensitive nervous system,” I thought, Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m so delicate. As it turns out, I do have a sensitive nervous system, accompanied by a vivid imagination. So many of my fears as a child involved monsters or other malevolent beings getting me while I slept. Even as an adult, I can’t watch horror movies or even the trailers for horror movies. I can’t entertain those thoughts.

It became very clear that if I had never looked at my husband’s video of the attempted car theft, I could have avoided having to ask God to chase out those images. I could avoid setting myself up for Connection

fear in the first place. It would also prevent me from being even more angry at my husband for putting himself in danger. So that’s what I decided. I honestly hadn’t thought about that video again until I started writing this article.

I couldn’t prevent this event from happening nor control any part of it, and I can’t say that I wasn’t shaken by it. But because I’m abstinent, I made good decisions about how to respond. I called for help, I paid attention so that I could be a good witness, and I didn’t yell and scream at my husband to get him to come back into the house. He’s an adult. He makes his choices. When it was all over, I went about working my program, just like any other day.

One thing that did surprise me, at least at first, was that I had some compassion for the would-be thief, even as it was all happening. I know what it’s like to take actions that I later regret or that harm other people when I am under the influence of a drug. Every time I tell my story or share at a meeting, I’m reminded of the consequences of my active food addiction and the subsequent humiliation. I don’t believe I would have ever tried to steal a car, but who knows, considering the other things I did to get food. God willing, if I work my program, I’ll never have to find out.

Angie R., New York, US 9

I

A Call for Help

never thought I would find myself here again. My eating was out of control. I was buying boxes of flour and sugar products and secretly eating them at home as I hid in the washroom. I would lie about needing to go out on errands and then buy food to eat in my parked car, all the while scanning for people who might recognize me as my hand went from the bag to my mouth.

If I couldn’t get out of the house to buy something, I would put together whatever I could find in my cupboards to satisfy my needs. Everything had become a binge food, even though it had all stopped tasting good.

Going to bed feeling bloated and hating myself for what I did, I cursed, saying to God, “I don’t understand. Why did I do it again? I know better!”

I first came into FA ten years ago, and by the grace of God, I lost 125 pounds. Unfortunately, I started filling my head with reasons to leave FA, and almost ten years later, I said my goodbyes to my committed meetings, service positions, and the fellowship of people I had come to know.

Knowing that I am a food addict, I entered another Twelve-Step program for food. In time, I came to understand the saying, “The food is the last thing to go.”

In this new group, I found it difficult to 10

build a fellowship with others. Eventually, I stopped making outreach calls, my attendance at meetings was irregular, I did not volunteer to do any service, my sponsor calls were sporadic, and I was becoming dishonest about my food. My portion sizes at restaurants were getting larger, the pieces of fruit I chose were the size of a baby’s head, and when I traveled, instead of maintaining my weight as I used to, I was now gaining weight. No longer working my tools or the Twelve Steps, my life was becoming unmanageable physically, mentally, and spiritually. I rationalized it all away, telling myself that I had only gained a few pounds, and I wasn’t eating flour and sugar.

I eventually came to understand that with no support, I was unprepared to deal with any major life situations. I was having severe headaches, and doctors discovered that I had a brain bleed requiring two brain surgeries, leaving me with physical and cognitive issues and depression.

I stayed in a hospital setting for almost two months. I was full of fear, doubt, and insecurity, and combined with the Covid lockdown, it was easy to isolate. My addiction was too strong, and after ten years of abstinence from flour, sugar, and binges, I took that first bite, leading me on a decline into deep denial May 2024

and an overwhelming obsession with food.

I began the diet rollercoaster, spending my days looking for the magic pill to save me but always finding myself face first in the food. I was doing things I had never done before. I was getting up in the middle of the night to eat, spending large amounts of money to get food, and trying to teach myself how to eat and throw up.

I had hit rock bottom, and even though I started each day with the best intentions, there was no crawling out from my new low.

I knew what I was doing was wrong, and I knew that FA was my answer, but I couldn’t pick up the phone to make a call for help.

This continued because there was always another diet to try, another promise to myself, to my son, or to God. Meanwhile, I watched the scale go up, then down, and then up again, with each up more than the last. What had become a typical day was to find myself in my parked car eating a large bag of sugar products, feeling physically ill and hopeless.

By the grace of God, almost two years after leaving FA, I picked up my phone and made a call for help. I was filled with amazement that the FA member answered the phone, took the time to listen to me, and said she would be my sponsor. Within a few days of committing my food and working the tools, the overwhelming obsession with food lifted, bringing peace and, most of all, hopefulness.

Lisa D., Canada Connection

Twelve Steps 1. We admitted we were powerless over food – that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to food addicts and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

11 Adapted with permission from Alcoholics Anonymous

I

Beginning To Heal

have lived in the Chicago area for most She was the thin one, the smart one, the one of my life. It was the home where I grew who got married and had two children who up, married, worked, and developed a were now married themselves. She was the few close friends. But as time went by and one with the Ph.D. and so many personal my parents and husband died, I found my- and professional accomplishments. I self struggling financially and aware of get- wanted her approval and love more than ting older. My mother had a serious talk anything else I could think of. with me before she died. One of the things No matter how I tried, I was not successshe said was, “Don’t ful. I lived with my sislose touch with your ter and brother-in-law My family didn’t understand sister.” I was 60 when when I first arrived I decided to move until I could find a job the program that was helping and out west to enjoy a place to live on closer relationships me achieve a normal body size my own. I wanted acwith my remaining ceptance, but I was family during my for the first time in my life. needy, frightened, “golden years.” I did and angry. I isolated what my mother sugmyself and left the gested and moved to California five years house daily to binge at every fast-food place ago to be near my only remaining family. in town. I ate like a bird in front of my family, When I arrived, I had a meltdown. At the as if they would not notice my size was time, I had no idea what food addiction was. growing. I was miserable and blamed them I only knew that I had been fat my whole for encouraging me to come to California life. As a child, I was “pleasingly plump,” and in the first place. into early adulthood, I white-knuckled it I finally got a job, bought a home, and enough to attract a man and get married. moved out on my own. I felt defeated and But I continued to obsess about food. I be- like a failure. I continued the same pattern lieved I would always be fat, and that would of behaviors that had kept me fat for many be okay if I could just find love and accept- years. I’d come home from work, put on ance from the sister I adored and admired. soft, comfortable clothes, and sit in front of 12

May 2024

the TV eating all night. I promised myself each night that I would do better tomorrow, but I never did.

Then, one day at work, I was talking with a colleague whom I never thought had a weight problem. I have no idea how the sub-

over two years ago. My family was happy that I found FA and delighted to see the weight coming off. They always thought I should lose weight for my health, and when they saw that I had found something that worked and was committed to it, they were

ject came up, but I felt safe enough to share my frustrations with my lifelong battle of the bulge. She handed me a trifold from FA. I got myself to a meeting, and when I heard the speaker and shares after the break, I felt like they were talking about me. I knew I was home. I found a sponsor from the intergroup list and got started. That was just

supportive. This was unusual behavior for me.

I struggled with the program for months.

There were many things to learn, and I tried to do it “my way.” I lied to my sponsor and to myself by omission and denial. But as the weight started coming off, I became more comfortable with the structure and the

SHARON C., MA

Connection

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tools. I started an AWOL and found that was extra work, and they had to give up cermy initial bewilderment turned into a real tain places if they wanted me to eat with desire for recovery. I began to take the tools them. seriously and stopped asking “why.”

I found myself wanting to explain my proI went from 181 pounds to 108, and that’s gram more and more, hoping that my famwhen the unexpected happened. My family ily would accept it and me. I was clumsy didn’t understand the program that was about how to handle it, and that made helping me achieve a normal body size for things worse. I got caught up in justifying the first time in my life. The more I took the my choices. I thought maybe they were program seriously, did my tools, and at- right for a while, but that’s only because I tended meetings, the wanted to please more they thought them. I talked with But as the weight started the program was too my sponsor and structured and conmade many calls to coming off, I became trolling. fellows to discuss this Once I began to eat troubling issue and more comfortable with out and attend family how to handle it. events, they began to the structure and the tools. Then I began to look see how differently I at my part. I was ate, and it became teworking way too dious at times to accommodate my needs. hard for their acceptance and approval.

They felt I was giving up my autonomy and It became clear to me that without FA, I judged it as overbearing to have someone was truly lost. I have become somewhat distell me what I could do. They thought I had tant from my family over these issues, but I lost too much weight, and that I could relax had to choose what was in my best interest. my efforts now. They didn't want to give up I chose Program first and hope that in time their ways of eating, and in their desire to be my relationship with my family will become inclusive, they didn't know how to be com- more comfortable for everyone. I know fortable with my new behaviors around that we love one another and are on a new food. They thought it was rude to bring my learning curve. One day at a time, if I can use food, and it made them feel awkward if I my tools, I will begin to heal. Once I can didn’t eat along with them. If I ate before or start healing on the inside, I can start healing after they did, they were uncomfortable. outside in my relationships.

Choosing a restaurant with food I could eat Margot S., California, US 14

May 2024

No Matter What

Open Sea Adventure

I

wanted to do something special for my milestone birthday. After months of planning, I made an appointment with the travel agent to discuss where I wanted to go. It had to be somewhere warm where I could experience the wonders of just being out on the open sea. After what seemed like hours of talking to the travel agent and looking at the brochure from a major cruise line, I chose an adventure in the Western Caribbean that included St. Maarten and the Cocoa Cay resort in the Bahamas. With travel arrangements secured, I researched what I could do for offshore excursions. I then checked with FA members who have gone on cruises to find out what to expect. My sponsor wisely sugConnection

gested that I take my food scale as a precaution. I decided that I was going solo because I felt that it would be easier for me to plan my abstinent meals and do my usual quiet time and morning routine.

Finally, the day arrived, and I was on my way to experiencing my first time on a cruise ship!

Ready to embark on my great adventure, I stood in line waiting to be checked in. Imagine my shock when the ticket agent stated that XANDRA G., CA there was no reservation in my name! I was stunned. I had presumed it was taken care of, so I called my travel agent. It turned out there was a glitch with the cruise line computer. The old me, in active food addiction, would have gone into panic mode, but because of 15

my FA recovery, I was able to stay calm. Even though the meeting was small and After the problem was resolved, I was on not in an ideal location, we made the most my way to Miami to start my long overdue of it. Most importantly, I stayed abstinent vacation of warm sunny days, basking in that night and for the rest of the cruise. the sun, and enjoying onshore excursions. At the conclusion of my trip, I ran into Once I was finally on board the cruise another glitch. At my home airport, we liner and in my room, I found an itinerary had to wait 45 minutes on the tarmac for for daily activities. There were many to another airplane to depart. Thankfully, choose from! But the main thing on my when I finally got my luggage, my sister mind was staying abstinent, no matter was still able to pick me up and drop me what temptations home. In the past, might call to me. I the unexpected I was surrounded by was surrounded by delay would have inviting attractions been another great inviting attractions and possible tempexcuse to eat, but tations, but my FA again, because of and possible temptations, prayer, I was able to recovery provided me with a peace that remain calm despite but my FA recovery was my secure ana stressful situation. chor. I had heard provided me with a peace After all that excitefrom FA members ment and a bit of that there were usuthat was my secure anchor. anxiety, it was good ally AA meetings to come home to my on cruise ships, and familiar surroundthe itinerary did list one AA meeting that ings. The whole cruising adventure was week. Since I didn’t have access to FA wonderful! I met some new people and meetings, I decided to attend the AA maintained my abstinence without feeling meeting to get my “medicine.” It was held any desire for food or alcohol. Practicing in the jazz club room, and there was only quiet time and using other FA tools on one other person who attended. After a the cruise liner made it possible for me to brief discussion, we decided I would lead remain abstinent and fully enjoy the amazthe meeting and qualify. I was grateful to ing wonders of my open sea adventure. share my experience, strength, and hope.

Mary Jane N., Maine, US 16

May 2024

Twelve Traditions 1. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends on FA unity.

2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority – a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

3. The only requirement for FA membership is a desire to stop eating addictively.

4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or FA as a whole.

5. Each group has but one primary purpose – to carry its message to the food addict who still suffers.

6. An FA group ought never endorse, finance or lend the FA name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary purpose.

7. Every FA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

8. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers.

9. FA, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

10. Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues, hence the FA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.

11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films.

12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.

Connection Adapted with permission from Alcoholics Anonymous

Notable and Quotable

Notable and Quotable

N

otable and Quotable is a new column with light-hearted and fun content in the form of short snippets and offers more interaction and opportunities for contributions from our active and diverse fellowship.

In the January/February issue we asked you to send your insights, thoughts, and tidbits about dating / romance in recovery. Those responses are being compiled for a future issue.

This month we’re looking for acronyms you’ve heard in recovery, like WAIT (Why Am I Talking?) or FEAR (Future Events Already Ruined).

Please send your favorite acronyms and any additional dating /romance in recovery submissions to articles@foodaddicts.org. Please include the letters “NQ” in the subject line.

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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.