Issue 81

A HARINGEY YOUTH PUBLICATION

free june 06

10th Anniversary Edition

issue 81

£0.00

is free and open to anyone between 14 and 21 living in or around Haringey.

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write, edit, illustrate & design this magazine build your own website make a video

The Bigger Shoe Box, Muswell Hill Centre, Hillfield Park N10 3QJ Tel: 020 8883 0260, Fax: 020 8883 2906, Mob: 07947 884 282 Email: editor@exposure.org.uk

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To get involved in Exposure projects, or to arrange work experience or a work placement, call Gary Flavell on 020 8883 0260, email gary@exposure.org.uk or just walk into the office.

www.exposure.org.uk A message from the Editor...

It’s ten years since Exposure magazine first gave young people the chance to say what they think. Since then, young Exposure volunteers have interviewed people like Tony Blair and Ken Livingstone, edited the Big Issue, represented Britain at a youth conference in Germany and won several awards, including the Phillip Lawrence Award, for their outstanding contribution to the community.

Exposure has grown into an organisation offering young people interested in the media the chance to gain experience and skills in print, on the internet, and on film. We’ve got a bigger office, more computers and every year our lavish birthday parties include an ever-more impressive range of fizzy drinks and biscuits. But it’s the young people themselves who have gained the most from the last ten years, and this issue of Exposure includes some of their best contributions.

Young people: you can’t beat them.

Regrettably our office is inaccessible to wheelchair users but we will nevertheless make every effort to include your contributions.

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sponsored by: social spider

issue #81 June 2006 kate

Articles THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY Kate Taylor, Issue 2, May 1996.

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A WORD IN VEG WAYS - 14 David Floyd, Issue 40, December 1999. Illustration by Shelton Harvey.

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SUPERUNKNOWN - 12 Sajeel Awan, Issues 22 &23, March & April 1998.

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sajeel

IS THIS EWE? - 10 Anna-Kim Davis, Issue 27, September 1998.

NEVER NEVER LAND - 22 Claire Oborne, Issue 68, March 2004

claire

FORCE THE ISSUE - 18 Katy Bezushko, Issue 50, February 2001.

FEDS AND PEDS - 32 Pacman, Issue 72, November 2004

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FUNNY DELIGHT - 30 Barry MacDonald, Issue 28, October 1998.

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ISLAMABAD THING? - 26 Sajeel Awan, Issue 55, October 2001.

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NO ESCAPE - 24 Felip Jejina, Issue 47, October 2000.

Features WHERE ARE THEY NOW? AGONY -

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POETRY -

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DIRECTORY -

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03 Youth Service

A MESSAGE FROM THE (FIRST) EDITOR Before Exposure there was an initiative to get a few pages for young people in Haringey People and I was picked out at a Youth Service summer scheme. Like any sane teenager I said no, but a youth worker convinced me to give it a go. It was brilliant, all the power and responsibility. I thought: ‘My name will be in writing and everyone will see it’. Then I get a phone call: it’s not going to happen, they’ve changed their mind. I was gutted. I took it as a lesson and vowed never to get involved with the local bureaucracy again.

Then I got a phone call about creating something different: Exposure. It took some persuading but I turned up and it was quite a sight: a white dude... open toed sandals... a bandana... and he wanted to know whether I was serious!

Me!? I was the one who’d just been let down by Haringey People!

Through word of mouth and a snippet in the press we got some young people coming in and had a lot of meetings. We thought up the magazine’s name, decided who would write what, and chose an editor (unfortunately, that was me). It took a month of us coming in every weekend to get the first issue out.

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We didn’t think we were starting a legacy or anything. It needed doing and we did it. It’s only with hindsight that you look back and think ‘what an occasion that was’.

The difference between Exposure and everything else was that we didn’t have to rely on anybody. We made all our own decisions and so it was something that we felt we owned, which is why, this time, it actually happened.

10 years later, I’m the guy in the bandana. I run my own course at Exposure and take pride in the young people’s development. It’s less to do with the skills they learn and more to do with what they feel: the power of creating and owning something, of finding their own voice and having it heard.

It’s about empowering young people to think for themselves and take control of what they’re doing, because the more you’re in control of your ambitions, your goals and your destiny, the happier you will be. After all, find a job doing something you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.

RYAN ALEXANDER

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ryan

Things SAMARITANS TEXT SERVICE Now anyone in the UK can text Samaritans for emotional support 24:7, 365 days a year. Texting is a quick, easy way to reach the Samaritans if you unable to email or call. A Samaritan volunteer - fully trained in ‘abbreviated text language’ - will reply, and it’s all confidential.

Text on 07725 90 90 90.

DOMINIC FREDERICK-ALLEN

SAVE THE WHALE WEEK 6 - 15 July 2006 www.wdcs.org/savethewhaleweek When whales open their eyes underwater, special greasy tears protect them from the stinging salt. That’s amazing! So why would anyone want to kill them, chop them up and make them into chewing gum?

Whale and dolphin enthusiasts around the whole of the UK are being asked to throw a Big Blue party and raise money to help save the whale. Imagine, loads of old men in sandals with beards! Get a wristband or hold an event - you’ll have a whale of time…

P.S. No whales were harmed in the writing of this article.

SINEM ENGIN-MEHMET

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‘n‘

Stuff CHEW ON THIS Eric Schlosser £6.99 Chew On This is a book about the secrets of the fastfood industry, filled with facts that claim to put you off even entering your local McDonalds or KFC - just a few of the fast-food joints exposed by Eric Schlosser.

It’s mostly an in-depth commentary on the history of the fast food industry, and mainly the fast food giants like McDonalds, Taco-Bell and Burger King. This focus on the humble beginnings of popular fast-food joints is boring and disappointing. You’d think they’d try and mess up the image of a tempting chips, dip and shake with nasty facts, not give you the founder’s life story.

Chew On This is just dull.

The fact I’m still pigging out on Big Mac’s and milkshakes (which apparently boast at least forty different additives) is testament to how ineffective this book is. Chips anyone?

MUNA SAEED

SWAPZ.CO.UK

QUOTE UNQUOTE

SWAPZ is the original and most popular UK swapping site, getting more than 1 million hits every day. And it’s not just old people swapping crossword puzzle books and tea cosies. In fact, it might be the only chance I get to swap my best friend for a dog in a cup, you know, one of those little cup-dogs...

DIANA MENDOZA

BRITISH LIBRARY FRONT PAGE COMPETITION www.bl.uk/onlinegallery/features/frontpage/frontpagecomp.html For young journalists, photographers and layout designers in three age groups. Win digital equipment or the chance to work on a national newspaper. The deadline is Monday 7 August.

“ ”

Anyone would think we’re running a youth project!

Andy Koumi Manager Exposure

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In November 1995, 18-year-old Leah Betts died after taking the drug Ecstacy. Following her funeral, a picture of her lying comatose in a hospital bed was used on 1500 billboards as part of a nationwide anti-drug campaign. Six months later, in only the second issue of Exposure, Kate Taylor’s article added to the controversy that led to Exposure being banned by some of Haringey’s schools.

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kate

THE AGONY & THE ECSTACY

BY KATE TAYLOR

D-R-U-G-S. Five letters which make up one of the most misunderstood and misinterpreted words in our society.

‘Drug culture’ is so widespread that it’s commonplace to see people as young as ten walking to school wearing Spliffy or Elegal jackets, hats or bags. To many, it’s seen as an integral part of youth culture, along with clubs and raves, the places most relentlessly targeted by the tabloids as being the breeding holes of sin and moral depravation.

In many reports the fact that drugs make people feel good is completely omitted.

No one takes drugs to screw up their brains or bodies, just as no one smokes to

policeman’s daughter who collapsed on her 18th birthday. Betts became a household name and the media went into overdrive warning the world of this demonic killer drug.

A big deal was made about the fact that it was Betts’ first E. When it came out that she had tried it a few times before we were all expected to be shocked. Yeah, like half of Britain’s teenagers hadn’t guessed that already.

What happened to Leah was tragic but the whirlwind of publicity surrounding Leah’s death has left a lot of people confused and misinformed. Over the past five years an estimated 250 million doses

“There is obviously something wrong in a society where at least one million people every week rely on mindaltering chemicals to feel part of something and have of E have been taken yet there have been a good time” damage their lungs or drinks to damage their livers. But the sensationalism in some areas of the media is not only misrepresentative of the problem, it can also be extremely dangerous. Scare stories only confuse people more, panic creates a bigger divide, and rash statements and mistrust form a wall between those who wish to take drugs and those who are against them.

For tabloids hungry for ‘an example’, Leah Betts was the jackpot. From the start victims of ecstasy-related deaths were different: these weren’t low-life junkies in tower blocks, they were often middle class, talented, young people from ‘stable’ backgrounds who were just out for a good time. They were the ultimate wake up call to parents, suddenly worried that their teenage son or daughter could be next.

Leah Betts personified the nightmare: a smart, attractive, home counties,

50 Ecstasy-related deaths at most - with a lot of these stemming from people mixing it with alcohol, speed or other substances.

When Ecstasy’s one in several million risk of death is compared to, say, parachute jumping, where there is a one in 85,000 risk, or a prescribed dose of penicillin, which will kill one patient in 200,000, you can see that it’s not just the danger of the drug that causes so much attention. E gives users a sense of belonging, no matter how fake. There is obviously something wrong in a society where at least one million people every week rely on mind-altering chemicals to feel part of something and have a good time.

In the end it’s the choice of the individual.

No one can really stop someone taking something that they really want to. But it should be an informed decision, where a person is fully aware of the facts and not just the hype and myths which are put across by both sides of drugs debate.

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Forget spots, puberty, exams and absolutely everything being SO unfair, what really seems to worry teenagers is fitting in with other people: hardly an issue of Exposure goes by without someone telling you to be yourself instead of following the crowd. Anna-Kim Davis’s article from September 1998 says it all perfectly (starting with a brilliant headline).

IS THIS EWE?

BY ANNA-KIM DAVIS

“Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.” So said Thomas Edison, the inventor of electricity. Becoming a success doesn’t happen overnight.

As children we all have aspirations to make something of our lives but as we get older those dreams fade as other distractions become more significant.

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These little pleasures conceal the hard truth: only hard work achieves results.

Many teenagers don’t want to believe this and become sheep, playing followmy-leader instead of trying to become one, for example: we’re all aware of the dangers of cigarettes, yet peer pressure makes many of us take up smoking.

Missing lessons, taking drugs, even

wearing designer labels... it all boils down to trying to be accepted by the in-crew.

You may appear to be self-assured on the outside but the reality is that people who want to be like the crowd are insecure within themselves. “I only try and fit in because my parents put pressure on me to be successful,” says Tanya, 15, from Wood Green. “My friends may be bad but they get me noticed.” Of course, getting noticed for the wrong reason is no way to be successful.

Teenagers admire the stars. What we see is the glamour and glitz of what they

Look at Nelson Mandela. He was in prison for 27 years but kept believing in his cause. His dedication helped him persevere through the ordeal of imprisonment and now he is the democratically elected president of a free South Africa.

Whatever you want to achieve in life it comes down to self-belief and hard work.

Nobody is going to hand you opportunities on a plate. If you want things, only you can make them happen.

Sitting in your bedroom dreaming about ‘what ifs’ won’t get you anywhere.

“Missing lessons, taking drugs, even wearing designer labels... it all boils down to trying to be accepted by the in-crew” The learning opportunity you get as a have become. We’re not told about the hard times, the knock backs, and the pain all these people must have gone through to reach the top.

Historical figures and famous people didn’t get there though luck or status but through striving to establish their goal.

young person comes only once. Make the most of it. No matter how exciting your life may seem - bunking school, missing lessons, abusing your body with drugs - it won’t last forever. Don’t be a sheep. Respect yourself. Make your own mind up about what you want. It doesn’t take a genius to work that out.

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September 1996 marked the debut of Sajeel Awan’s column, SuperUnknown. It ran for 53 issues and nearly five years and covered everything from crop circles and the Men In Black to zombies and the afterlife. This article, spread over issues 22 and 23, from March and April 1998, covers the most famous UFO incident of all: Roswell.

SUPERUNKNOWN

BY SAJEEL AWAN

You are about to see things you were never supposed to see. You are about to know things you were never meant to know. Once you begin reading, there will be no turning back. Those prone to panic attacks or who scare easily should read no further. There is no shame in running away from the truth.

Millions of people do it all the time.

On 4 July 1947 an alien spacecraft crashed in Roswell, New Mexico. The US Airforce recovered the wreckage and four alien bodies. One of the aliens recovered from Roswell survived the impact and eventually communicated through a combination of a holographic projection device and telepathy. Before it died, the being delivered its all important message.

deal with the Greys. In exchange for advanced alien technology, the Greys could abduct anyone they wanted on condition that an ‘abductee list’ be regularly provided to MJ-12 and the National Security Council. These abductions were for cross-breeding purposes: the Greys are creating alien/human hybrids to succeed their dying species.

But the Greys began abducting more people than agreed, and for very different purposes: they were implanting programming devices into the brains of abductees, turning them into remotecontrolled alien imposters. And it wasn’t just the Greys causing problems for MJ-12: the US Congress was getting nosy; Aura-Z,

“The history we have grown familiar with is false” That message shaped what you would call history. After Roswell, President Harry Truman brought together an elite group of government, military and scientific officials to monitor alien activity and coordinate planetary defence. The group was led by a 12 member high council christened ‘Majestic 12’. Make no mistake, MJ-12 runs America and, with its counterparts from other nations, the entire world.

There are several alien races, all with different purposes, the most active of which are the Greys, from a star system called Zeta Reticuli. In 1952, MJ-12 made a

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Russia’s MJ-12 equivalent, was becoming a potent force; the rise of Fidel Castro was hurting the Mafia’s drug profits and thereby the funding of MJ-12 and the CIA; factions within the secret government were turning against each other; and some bloke named Kennedy was becoming a nuisance too. Meanwhile the aliens were setting up bases in Mexico, Puerto Rico and Belgium, and MJ-12 officers were being manipulated by the Grey’s mind control devices.

The history we have grown familiar with is false. The real chronicle of the last 50 years tells a very different story. The following is a taste of the real 20th century brought about by this chaos:

sajeel

• The AIDs virus is a biological weapon.

• The peace and love era of the 1960s was controlled by alien imposters.

• Cult leader and serial killer Charles Manson was also an alien imposter.

• Richard Nixon and George Bush Sr killed JFK. Lee Harvey Oswald was an operative of Aura-Z. • British military and intelligence forces are subordinate to America.

• NASA is home to Nazi war criminals.

• The Watergate scandal was a smokescreen.

• James Earl Ray did not kill Martin Luther King.

• There is already a Moonbase.

• The internet is a subliminal brainwashing operation which is a danger to anyone who uses it.

• Star Wars, Star Trek and the like are designed to mentally prepare us for contact.

• Don’t ever go to the dentist.

There will be no UFOs landing in Washington, Moscow, and London. There will be no media coverage. There will be no public panic or hysteria. The alien invasion is being carried out in silence and secrecy, as it has been for 50 years.

It doesn’t matter where you live, who you are or what you think. You are all victims, not only of an evil alien race, but of a corrupt, chaotic secret world government system that answers to no one.

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Illustration by Shelton Harvey

Not all young Exposure volunteers live on a diet of chocolate, chips and chicken wings. In this article from December 1999 - several years before the great turkey twizzler school dinners scandal made young people’s diets a national issue - David Floyd tried to unite the masses against meat and score a victory for vegetarianism.

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BY DAVID FLOYD Just over two years ago I became a vegetarian. No, I’m not a teenage girl with a fetish for furry animals, and a fear of sandals stops me from becoming a hippy. So why did I stop eating meat?

Well, I don’t like killing things. But this is an educational magazine so you’ll probably be expecting a bit more of an explanation than that…

“I don’t want to get mad cow disease, thank you very much,” said Lola, 19 from Highgate.

“When I see little calves running round a farm, I can’t stand the thought of eating them with a portion of chips,” said Nadine, 17 from Harringay.

The emotive issue of animal rights is often a key factor in young people becoming vegetarians. But there are also more

david

shelton

A WORD IN VEG WAYS

year from malnutrition or related diseases. If we stopped wasting farmland to produce meat we could go a long way towards tackling these problems.

A flick though a young vegetarian’s advice book suggest that a big problem for would-be vegetarians is convincing their parents that they aren’t going to waste away in a world without shepherd’s pie, pork chops and chicken nuggets. But in a wealthy country like Britain it’s quite easy to cut meat out of your diet. Indeed health advisors say that if you want to live a long and healthy life you should eat less fat, more carbohydrates and more fibre. So vegetarianism is a recipe for healthy eating: lots of fruit, vegetables, pulses and cereals and no big, fat, blood-drenched steaks!

But if, like me, you want to live a shorter but slightly happier life, with lots of chips, cakes and chocolate, vegetarians can do that too! Unfortunately sweets can be problem. Chewy ones contain gelatin (made by boiling animals bones) so we need to steer clear of those. Sucks!

“The more malicious meat-eaters find other ways to justify their need to munch on the flesh of living creatures, like pointing out that Adolf Hitler was a vegetarian” The more malicious meat-eaters find complicated, practical issues. Did you know that about 80% of British farmland is used for the production of meat but that farm animals convert only about one tenth of what they eat into protein which we in turn can eat? The other 90% is wasted, much of it converted into dung.

So our farms are mostly used to make animal poo!

The world’s cattle alone consume a quantity of food equivalent to the needs of twice the population of our planet. We can send people to the moon but can’t figure out how to feed 1.2 billion undernourished people. While we’re wasting valuable resources feeding cows to make burgers nearly a quarter of the world’s population doesn’t have enough to eat and 15 million children die each

other ways to justify their need to munch on the flesh of living creatures, like pointing out that Adolf Hitler was a vegetarian. It is also true that the Nazi leader had a moustache. While people with lots of facial hair can be scary, most of them wouldn’t advocate the invasion of Czechoslovakia and Poland as the first step towards world domination. And neither do vegetarians.

So the completely balanced and unbiased conclusion is that this vegetarian stuff is a neat idea, high on happiness and health, low on fat and heart disease. You know it makes sense.

In fact, probably the most difficult dilemma for me as a modern vegetarian is what to say to a beautiful woman who offers me her last fruit pastille. Now there’s something to chew on

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WHERE WHERE ARE ARE THEY THEY NOW? NOW? JUST A FEW OF THE HUNDREDS OF YOUNG PEOPLE WHO’VE BEEN INVOLVED WITH EXPOSURE OVER THE LAST 10 YEARS...

LEO TAPALOV “Three years ago I was sent to Exposure by the Youth Offending Service to complete my community service. I got involved in design work producing graphics and layouts for articles in Exposure magazine. I learnt how to use QuarkXPress, Photoshop and Illustrator. I went to Barnet College to carry on with graphic design. I’m now at Middlesex University where I’m doing a diploma in graphic design. With what I learnt from Exposure I’ve also launched a magazine by and for Russian youths called Steep which is going really well. I’m also working with a group of young Kurdish and Turkish people to launch a youth magazine for their community.”

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MICHAEL AUMEERALLY “I started in June 1996 as a volunteer as part of Exposure’s internet activities. I got work as the online editor as well as providing general IT support which continued on and off until the end of 2005. During that time we won an award for the best UK website representing young people.

Exposure gave me a lot of opportunities to learn new skills and gave me a chance to work with other creative people in a team. I am now working for the Apple Store in Brent Cross as a ‘Mac Genius’ providing technical support and assistance to its customers and undertaking instore repairs.”

RACHELLE MORRIS

DAVID FLOYD

“I’ve been involved from 1999 to the present. I was involved in work experience, writing articles, illustrating, music reviews, and web page design. I never left Exposure! I just temporarily disengaged with university and work - you know, that future-building stuff! Now I’m in my final year at university.”

“I was a volunteer journalist for a number of years while still at school and college and then I became editor of Exposure magazine in 2001. I became a freelance arts worker and poet and then started a not-for-profit design company called Social Spider with former Exposure member of staff Mustafa Kurtuldu. We haven’t gone bust yet. Working with Andy, Exposure’s manager, provided me with a series of memorable catchphrases, many based on Cypriot proverbs, that now provide an ongoing source of inspiration to Social Spider’s staff team and clients.”

RUPA TAILOR “I joined Exposure when I was 13. I wrote articles on sex, alcohol and under-18 nights at warehouses in Kings Cross - clearly setting the wheels in motion for the future! I remained at Exposure for about five years writing, helping out, making coffee and chatting really. All good fun though and when the (occasional) prospective employer sees it, you know they’re impressed. I’m now in my second year at Bristol University doing Ancient History and absolutely loving it.”

FRANCESCA ALPHONSO “I started off as a volunteer in 2000 and became a full-time paid member of staff at the end of the same year. Being in a creative environment and encouraging young people to develop their potential spurred me to follow my own creative pathway. Now I’m doing a fashion course before launching myself into a fashion design career.”

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Young people often write about experiences and events in their lives to try and help other young people cope with, understand or avoid similar situations. In issue 50, from February 2001, Katy Bezushko told her story of being drugged and sexually assaulted in broad daylight by her friends.

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FORCE THE ISSUE

BY KATY BEZUSHKO Date rape is a senseless, violent crime and victims face a long, painful process of recovery. I know because it happened to me.

I was 13 at the time and a naïve tomboy.

Most of my close friends were boys who I thought I knew and could trust. I went out for a walk to the nearby heath with three of my male friends. They suggested we sit down in the tall grass for a chat. It was a bright, sunny day, so I agreed. (Rape doesn’t always happen in dark alleys, late at night.)

As we sat in a circle, the eldest boy nonchalantly pulled a bottle of Southern Comfort out of his jacket pocket. I stayed out of curiosity; I’d never tasted alcohol before. The rest is history: a painful, blurry recollection scarred in the back of my mind.

One way to prevent date rape is to avoid alcoholic drinks, but if you do drink, do it in moderation. Keep an eye on your glass to make sure that no one puts anything in it. I’m not saying that every guy you meet will try to rape you, but it pays to be careful. If you find yourself in a situation that makes you uncomfortable or uneasy, leave. Be assertive: it’s your body and you should always have the last say in what happens to it. Stay with a mixed group. If you go off on your own with a group of boys, you make yourself vulnerable, especially if you’ve been drinking or taking drugs. In these situations, there’s no one to help you should problems arise.

If you find yourself in the same situation as me, don’t hesitate to press charges.

Date rape is a crime and those who

“One way to prevent date rape is to avoid alcoholic drinks, but if you do drink, do it in moderation. Keep an eye on your glass to make sure that no one puts commit it are criminals, they should be anything in it” I got home later that day, drunk and sobbing. I was confused, scared and uncertain about what had happened but immediately told my mother. The next day she took me to the hospital and the doctors confirmed that I’d been raped.

We were told that my drink was spiked with GHB (Gammahydroxybutyrate), the date rape drug.

I refused to press charges because I didn’t want to get my friends into trouble.

That was a big mistake; my so called ‘friends’ have never been punished, they are less likely to regret it and more likely do it again. One of the boys who raped me approached me on the street recently and we spoke briefly. At first he just said, ‘I didn’t rape you’ and denied everything. By the end of our conversation, the best I got from him was a cold ‘sh*t happens’.

treated as criminals. Talk to someone you can trust, go to the hospital to be checked for infections, injury, or pregnancy, then tell the police. Find a therapist who can help you regain your confidence and slowly get back to normal. Aftercare, including post-trauma therapy and medical attention, is readily available to date rape victims.

Most importantly of all, remember that it’s not your fault. No one should ever blame you and don’t let anyone tell you different. Whatever the situation, whether you were drinking, smoking, or flirting, if someone has sex with you without your consent, or against your will, it is rape.

I still think about my experience everyday. I’m constantly reminded of it talking with friends, watching the news, or by the occasional bad dream. But as time goes by it become easier and I know things will be okay.

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10 YEARS OF THE PUNNIEST HEADLINES...

E C I P S F O A WASTE 96 ecember 19 s, Issue 8, D irl G e ic Sp The

JUDO WHAT I MEAN? Judo, Issue 24, May 1998

K R O W F O E NAZI PIEC 99 e 36, July 19 Racism, Issu

R E D R O S I D G N I T BEA Issue 45, July 2000 mpulsive overeater, co a ing be to up Facing

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Y P P I L G N I T T GE 4 er 200 ptemb e S , 1 ue 7 as, Iss Vagin

E K O J O N Z I H SC 98 October 19 a, Issue 28, Schizophreni

D N I M R U O Y K SPOO , June 1999 Ghosts, Issue 35

L L I K O T D STRESSE ch 2000 sue 42, Mar d suicide, Is an n io ss re Dep

HARINGEY’S RUBBISH

The environment, Iss ue 68, March 2004

E T A T S E T A THE GRE Improving

bruary 2005 , Issue 73, Fe te ta Es ad Ro Stonebridge

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In Issue 68, from March 2004, Claire Oborne wrote about her brother, Paul, who suffers from an unknown mental illness. She does what young people do very well and defies expectations by writing an article that’s funnier than you’d think.

NEVER NEVER LAND

BY CLAIRE OBORNE ‘Darling, darling, welcome home!’ booms an American voice as I get back from school. It’s not some foreign relative come to visit, it’s my younger brother Paul reciting a line from a film.

He’s fifteen years old but has a mental age of about eight. He can’t distinguish the difference between ‘he’ and ‘she’ or do maths any more complicated than simple addition. The books he reads are for a small child.

His exact medical condition is unknown even to doctors. All his life Paul has lived in and out of hospitals getting endless brain scans, different medicines and blood tests (which for some reason he calls a ‘testum’).

Paul has the most amazing visual memory for films and TV shows. Not so long ago an episode of Fireman Sam came on which hadn’t been shown for at least eight years. Within ten seconds he said ‘Watch out for the banana!’ and laughed. I looked at the TV but there was no banana so I just thought he’d got it wrong. But Paul kept announcing speech before it had been said and at the end a banana appeared from the chimney.

Most of his speech is made up of lines from films and more often than not, Disney films. He watches them endlessly, laughing at exactly the same bits every time. His latest phase, in truth a little disturbing, is to sneak a video upstairs

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and watch the funny bit again and again and again: whizzing, playing, watching, whizzing playing, watching. It’ll only be about five seconds long and he laughs every time. The second he hears my mum coming up the stairs, he stops the video and lies back on the bed, staring at the ceiling as though nothing ever happened. It never works but he hasn’t quite seemed to realise that yet!

He’s painfully shy around people he doesn’t know but with his family and friends he’s one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. Admittedly he’s often not aware of it: the other day he hurt his knee so jumped up and down holding it saying ‘Oh, my wrist, my wrist!’. He’ll break into strange dances on a crowded street or see an overweight person and yell out ‘they’re not hungry’. Once he was on the back seat of a bus, my mum on one side and a stranger with a rather deformed

claire

“Like a small child he watches Disney Films endlessly, laughing at exactly the same bits every time” nose, on the other. Paul shook my mum and pointed at the man saying ‘Urgh, mummy, mummy, look at his nose!’ as she hurriedly tried to shut him up. For a while he also liked carrying a bag with him and one day we came home from a restaurant to discover a knife, fork, salt, pepper and the menu in it.

He doesn’t know there’s something wrong with him, and probably never will, which

is a good way to live. He’s really happy and bubbly most of the time. I don’t know what’s meant to happen to him when he’s older, no one does. He can’t stay by himself in case he has an accident but can’t always stay attached to his family.

Although people will look upon him as different, he seems better than a ‘normal’ brother and I wouldn’t change him for the world.

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Haringey must be one of the most culturally diverse places in the world, with the people here speaking over 190 different languages. As a result, racial tensions and tolerance are recurring subjects for young people at Exposure. In October 2000, Felip Jejina described his experience of seeking asylum in the UK after being forced out of Yugoslavia by NATO’s bombing campaign in 1999.

BY FELIP JEJINA Imagine one afternoon you’re shopping in Wood Green Shopping City and suddenly bombs start dropping from the sky, leaving half of it in ruins. Dead people are all over the place. Next thing you know, your parents say you have to move to another country and that the journey into the unknown starts tomorrow morning. You don’t even have time to say goodbye to your friends.

That’s what happened to me in May last year. Of course, the war zone was not

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Wood Green. It was the shopping centre in Belgrade, Yugoslavia. That’s why my parents, my ten year old sister Ana and I came to London to claim asylum.

I didn’t want to come here but I arrived hoping for a normal life and to make lots of new friends.

I looked forward to going to school but it soon turned out to be very unpleasant.

The first question people asked was where was I from. Television had made my country very unpopular with its coverage

“I didn’t want to come here but I arrived hoping for a normal life and to make lots of new friends” of the war on the Balkans. Many guys started asking a lot of questions about the war. It was a topic I hated. Some questions were really stupid and offensive.

They asked whether I’d seen soldiers killing children.

When that stopped I tried to fit in but it was virtually impossible because most people in my school hang around with their own ethnic group. When I tried to join in guys would start to use their first language. The clear message was: ‘go away!’

I was amazed that people who were immigrants or children of immigrants themselves could behave like that. They were even making jokes about my ‘weird’ and ‘funny’ accent, although my English was as good as theirs. So, instead of

hours a day in college. For the rest of the day you can do nothing as the law does not allow you to work.

Since April 2000 life has been even more difficult for asylum seekers because, instead of being given £50 a week in cash, you have to live on £26.60 worth of vouchers. What’s worse, vouchers can only be used for food. Youngsters cannot use public transport, cannot go to the cinema, and cannot go to clubs. In short, people like you and me can only sit in the house or go to school. Would you be able to live like that?

What has surprised me most is that the majority of British people support these measures while many others just don’t care. It is unbelievable that this happens

“Many guys started asking a lot of questions about the war. It was a topic I hated. They asked whether I’d seen soldiers killing children” in a modern, multiracial and tolerant making friends I ended up lonely. I was also becoming homesick and really missed my old mates from Belgrade.

society like ours.

There are many young people in Haringey and all over the UK with similar experiences, and some that are a hundred times worse. Some young people come here alone, traumatised by war and without any money and belongings.

When are we going to stop being prejudiced against people because they are from a different place or because their religion, their skin or their accent is different?

They face so many problems. Sometimes they are forced to live in hostels for over six months sharing a room with strangers because young asylum seekers ‘are not a priority’. Proper accommodation is always reserved for families.

To get a place in secondary school, teenage asylum seekers need to wait for at least two months. If you’re over 16 you’re too old for secondary education and can only learn English two or three

Or are we just lying to everyone, including ourselves, that we are tolerant?

In Haringey many, if not most, young people are children of immigrants whose parents faced far worse mistreatment and racism when they first came over to Britain.

You would expect these youngsters to understand the problems of new teenage immigrants from the Balkans, ex-Soviet Union, Asia and Africa. They could help people like me adjust to our new home.

Instead they make the change even more difficult.

Have we learned nothing?

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On September 11 2001, terrorists hijacked four planes, flying two into the World Trade Centre in New York and one into the Pentagon in Washington. The two towers collapsed within hours, killing 2986 people. Issue 55 of Exposure, published a few weeks later, gave young people the chance to express their views on the attacks and their aftermath.

ISLAMABAD THING?

BY SAJEEL AWAN The recent terrorist attack on America was a disaster of epic proportions. The huge loss of human life was terrible and heartbreaking. But what we need to examine now is the public response and how it will affect the peaceful coexistence that this society of ours is supposed to be so proud of.

To hold all Muslims or people of MiddleEastern origin responsible for the actions of a misguided minority is not only ridiculous, it is bordering on fascism. It is the equivalent of holding all Christians accountable for the actions of General Pinochet because he held some Christian beliefs.

Most people’s immediate reaction was a mixture of shock, outrage and sympathy.

But what disturbed me was the subsequent vilification of normal, innocent Muslims: Muslim cab drivers being beaten up; mosques being attacked; Muslims being taunted and verbally abused, or receiving hate mail and death threats;

There are some arrogant, even racist Muslims but there are also arrogant Christians, Jews, Hindus and atheists. The television coverage of Palestinians celebrating in the street was disturbing but it should have been made clearer that the majority of Palestinians in that region had not reacted in such a distasteful manner.

“The murder of unarmed civilians, women and children is not condoned in the Qur’an or in any of the teachings of the prophet Mohammad” women being abused on the street for wearing headscarves.

Perhaps this behaviour is only a temporary knee jerk reaction, but there’s a real danger of this unacceptable behaviour continuing. If so, it will only increase mistrust, tension and unrest.

What happened in New York and Washington was a result of anger, hatred, and racism. Taking out more anger on innocent Muslims will do no one any good. If anything, it’s an arrogant dishonour to the very loss of human life that we are mourning.

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In fact, the majority of Muslims here, in the Middle East and elsewhere were as appalled as anyone else by what happened.

Islam is not united in all its beliefs, particularly the meaning of ‘Jihad’.

Depending on who you listen to, Jihad is either an obligation placed on Muslims to fight on behalf of fellow Muslims who are oppressed or mistreated, or an ongoing struggle to impose Islamic law over the world. Even the description of Jihad as ‘holy war’ is not entirely accurate. It refers to an Islamic struggle that can manifest itself in forms such as teaching, writing and art. Terrorism is the extreme, not the rule.

sajeel

The Taliban regime that is said to have been harbouring and supporting the terrorists of Osama Bin Laden’s al-Qaeda movement is also, despite its beliefs to the contrary, in contradiction to orthodox Islam. Islam is supposed to be tolerant of all other religions. Women are supposed to have rights. The Taliban must have rewritten the Qur’an. Or read it upside down.

The murder of unarmed civilians, women and children is not condoned in the Qur’an or in any of the teachings of the prophet Mohammad. Combat is supposed to be limited to face-to-face fighting against soldiers. Doesn’t this make

the attack on the World Trade Centre a violation of Islamic teaching?

Whoever is responsible for the attack on America, and for any acts that claim the lives of innocent people, should be made accountable for their actions. Anyone who celebrates the death or suffering of another human being should be chastised. But blind anger directed towards all Muslims or people of Arab descent will only spawn further hatred and intensify the cycle that led to these horrific events in the first place.

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MARCH 1997 I went to a party an d everybody had be en drinking. My friend left early and a few hours later her boyfriend wa lked me home. My parents were out an d I invited him in. We were talking and all of a sudden his hand sta rted going for walks. We started kissing on the sofa and then ended up in my room. Neither of us regret it, but how do we tell my friend?

If you were a good friend this would ne ver have happened. Bu t now you have to face up to the consequen ces. Mixing booze and hormones results in friendships suffering . It happens all the tim e. But beware - if he ’s cheated once with you, he’ll do it again with someone else.

JUNE 2000 going I’m in love with a girl but she’s she out with my best friend. I know him. likes she as h muc as just me likes ds nee she n whe e I’m always ther sn’t someone to talk to but he doe he than er bett h muc her t trea care; I I do. does. He doesn’t deserve her, I won’t She’s the best girl I know and her. like else find anyone gles What a mess! These love trian t girl always end in tears. The ‘bes s to you know’ is someone who seem with spend most of her time flirting r her boyfriend’s best mate. You lot friend is going to need you a rt. more when she breaks his hea

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JULY 2004 best yfriend and I think my bo other ch ea ng ei mate are se e ck. They wer behind my ba d seeing him rte sta I re fo friends be getting they’ve been but recently ed tic no e well. I’v on a bit too other, they ch ea ith w them flirting d even the phone an talk a lot on they’re ys sa t me. He go out withou ates. just good m can ys and girls Damn girl! Bo without anything es be good mat trust a t you can’t going on. Bu know to in ra -b man tiny human ering th bo s t so, if it’ what’s wha ould talk sh u yo h, you that muc reful; d. But be ca to your frien e human th , to ts an when she w and manipulate female can , a cold deceive with l precision. ca ni ha ec m

JANUARY 1998 d A few months ago I was abducte from my bedroom and taken aboard an alien spaceship. The ds and aliens were shor t with big hea me black eyes. They operated on t they wha me told They me. and hurt of the were doing was for the good human race. I think they impregnated me. it’s There is nothing you can do; too late. After you’ve given birth ect the aliens will be back to coll n the child. You will then be give on ing stay er eith of on opti the n Earth or migrating to the alie risk homeworld. If you stay, you in being hunted down by the Men r.

Black. Your time on Earth is ove

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In 1998 the mysterious soft drink Sunny Delight hit supermarket chiller cabinets in a blast of orange flavoured publicity. But not everyone was taken in by the £10 million promotional campaign. In Issue 28 from October 1998, Barry MacDonald tried to find out why it really tasted so good.

FUNNY DELIGHT

BY BARRY MACDONALD It’s orange (in colour if not in content), cheap, comes in six different flavours and even keeps mum and dad happy with its ‘vitamin enriched’ formula. Young people all over the UK are obsessed with Sunny Delight. Supermarket shelves are constantly being restocked to cope with the demand. The soft drink even outsells Coca Cola and it’s only been available in the UK since April of this year!

Could it be Sunny Delight’s healthy vitamins: A, B, C, Zzzz? Not likely. Most teens these days grow up on a diet of school canteen chips and burgers, so we’re hardly preoccupied with nutritional value.

“Sunny Delight is just delicious,” says Jonathan, 14, from Tottenham. “I usually buy a litre a day and that doesn’t include the amount I drink when I get home.

Further analysis is needed. We went in search of the American website but none of our questions were answered. Instead, after we told them where we were from,

Is it the tons of money off vouchers put through our letter boxes? No, because as good citizens, most of us chucked them into Haringey’s recycle bins.

“So what is going on? Does Sunny Delight’s colourful exterior conceal a darker more demonic interior?”

“What can I say?” says Grace, 15, from Muswell Hill. “Sunny Delight is the best drink in the world. I can’t get enough.”

“From the day I tasted it I knew there was no other drink for me,” says Paula, 15, from Edmonton.

Why does this drink cause such obsessive behaviour? It can’t be the advertising - all the TV commercials are modified clones of each other and bad ones at that: kids come home from playing sport, open fridge, choose Sunny Delight over all the other drinks, finish off bottle, mum brings them another, kids go wild... etc.

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how much we ‘loved’ Sunny Delight, and where we hung out (why did they need to know this?), they said they would send us a free bottle. We’re still waiting...

No nearer the truth we decided to approach the very source of this growing enigma. We asked makers Procter & Gamble for an explanation. Mysteriously, nobody was available for comment.

Instead we were fobbed off with a sinister, photocopied information sheet: “Kids love the taste because it’s not as sharp as 100% orange juice and has none of the pulpy bits. Sunny Delight is a refreshing drink and a great source of

barry

energy. It’s ideal for quenching the thirst of active kids on the go as well as tasting great.”

Our thirst for knowledge was, however, far from drenched. To add to the mystery we learned that the Americans have had this ‘wonder drink’ since 1964 but have only now shared its secrets with an unsuspecting British public.

So what is going on? Does Sunny Delight’s colourful exterior conceal a darker more demonic interior? Is it really just a healthy beverage or is Sunny Delight seriously addictive, turning a whole generation of youngsters into Delightaholics?

Theory 1: Since the 1950s the ‘secret government’ has been working on ways to mentally prepare the world for a cataclysmic event, due some time after the new millennium. What better way than through a top selling soft drink? Look carefully at the Sunny Delight logo. The graphic clearly shows an exploding sun.

‘Sunny Delight’ is itself an anagram of ‘Deny Sunlight’. Sunny Delight is warning us of the imminent destruction of the sun and, in turn, life.

Theory 2: It tastes nice.

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Giving young people a genuine voice has one drawback: you might not always understand what they say. Pacman’s article in issue 72, from November 2004, contains a lot of street slang. But without the youth-speak, it wouldn’t be nearly so good to read.

BY PACMAN At 13 I spent most of my time in the tunnels under Morant Place riding ‘peds and having swingers and beef with my people.

Back when I was a little nerd, I saw couple of heads riding ‘peds up and down my road. I recognised one of them. He saw me and said: ‘Wah gwan? Look out for feds yeah, ‘cos man don wanna get shift’.

I just stood there watching them blitz up and down. Do you know how small that made me feel? They were riding ‘peds and all I had was a banged up BMX.

the park and saw a Gilera. My bredren couldn’t get it started so we popped the seat looking for a lid. Inside was a kind of little ball. T. told me it was herb wrapped in foil. We carried on searching the ‘ped and found three blocks of skunk. Back in the endz we saw a boy who lives near my crib. He shots so we showed him what we’d found and he told us it was nearly half an ounce.

Things started to go wrong. I wouldn’t come home for a couple of days because I was hanging on the road with

“Overtaking cars and popping wheelies, I looked back and saw blue lights and heard sirens” My friend T. knocked for me: ‘Yo there’s a ‘ped on the top of the road do you wanna blitz it?’ Five minutes later you see me riding the ‘ped up and down with a big smile on my face. Two days later the bike was written off ‘cos everyone crashed it. That made me wanna get my own.

My boy T. was talking about bolt cutters and that he knew how to jack a ‘ped. We went out near Nightingale Fed Station by

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my people doing all-nighters. Anything that caught my interest was mine. I was living like a hood rat. My people were getting arrested and I was just counting myself lucky.

I’d go to Wood Green and hear my people talking about me: ‘You see that boy there, he’s a top guy for movements’.

That made me a bit big headed and I started boasting about myself, bigging

pacman

myself up. They kept calling me the ‘Indian Criminal’ ‘cos I was the only nonblack person there, which made me feel lively and hyped.

One morning two of the people that started me off were riding a Gilera 125. I jumped out of bed and went to join them.

Up near Alexandra Palace station, o. I decided not to stop and took the chase.

never get away. Something hit me on the back of my leg and I dropped. At least five feds surrounded me and two were sitting on the back of my legs, pinching me. Straight away I felt pissed knowing they were sending me to the bin and knowing that my parents would find out.

As I bust the turn near the supermarket, hitting 70 or 80 miles per hour, the police car hit the back of my ‘ped and licked me off the ground. I skidded across grass and concrete then, with half my body stuck under the bike, I looked up and saw the feds getting out of the car. I jumped up, threw the helmet at one of them and ran.

With the feds behind me and a riot van driving through the park I thought I’d

The first time anyone gets arrested they feel proud. But it was stupid. When I was in court, my teacher faxed a letter saying how good I was in school. Half of it was a lie but that made me change my mind about school. It’s just a piece of paper, but that piece of paper’s your life. All the bad people from school just disappear.

Get an education and don’t let anyone put you down about it.

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vour. ays sa I’ll alw te s vour, ta a e-a amy fl Chees nd cre a a m rt aro y a pa It’s rich eart. s all pla le ty in my h s ried heese c r fo The va lace ing a p In mak

, hard and soft, Strong and mild e waft, th a stench-lik Odourless or wi nt peas, bbage, don’t wa Don’t want ca cheese. buds, give me Thrill my taste BER 1997 ISSUE 17, OCTO DAVID FLOYD,

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Send your poetry to: The Bigger Shoe Box, Muswell Hill Centre, Hillfield Park N10 3QJ Tel: 020 8883 0260, Fax: 020 8883 2906, Mob: 07947 884 282, Email: editor@exposure.org.uk

Directory YOUTH CLUBS Muswell Hill Youth Centre 020 8883 5855 Bruce Grove Youth Project 020 8808 1604 Wood Green Area Youth Project 020 8489 8940 / 020 8489 8942 SEXUAL HEALTH 4YP Haringey Tuesday 2.30-4.30pm St Ann’s Sexual Health Centre 020 8442 6605/6536 4YP Drop-in Sessions: Northumberland Park Monday 3.30-6.30pm Aspire Youth Project, Kenneth Robins House, 240 Northumberland Park Rd, N17 0BX.

Open Door 020 8348 5947 DISABILITIES Markfield Project Markfield Road, Tottenham 020 8800 4134 Haringey Phoenix Group 020 8889 7070 haringeyphoenixgroup@yahoo.co.uk www.haringeyphoenix.org.uk

Wood Green Wednesday 3.30-6.30pm Sky City Community Centre, (Wood Green Shopping City), 65 Penwortham Court, 50 Mayes Road, Wood Green, N22 6SR.

www.alcoholconcern.org.uk

SCHEMES AND PROGRAMMES Duke of Edinburgh Award 020 8489 8941 / 07967 336 338 e2e 020 8889 0022 Keep It Simple Training 0871 200 2321 Prince’s Trust 020 8375 3420 BTCV Millenium Volunteers 020 7843 4292 / 7843 4291 mv-london@btcv.org.uk www.mv-london.org.uk Tottenham Connexions Centre 020 8808 0333 Revolving Doors Agency 07989 708 461 / 07779 098 269 www.revolving-doors.co.uk stephen@revolving-doors.co.uk or tracie@revolving-doors.co.uk

www.talktofrank.com

BULLYING

EMERGENCY HOUSING Shelterline 0808 800 4444 HELPLINES Childline 0800 11 11

Bullying Online www.bullying.co.uk

4YP Bus 0800 1613 715 www.4yp.co.uk

www.addaction.org.uk

NSPCC Child Protection Helpline 0808 800 5000 www.nspcc.org.uk

Young Mums To Be 020 8889 0022 Outzone www.outzone.org.uk Haringey Young People’s Counselling Service 020 8489 8944

STAFF Andreas Koumi Jon Golds Enrico Tessarin Luke Pantelidou

DRUGS AND ALCOHOL Step-Ahead 020 8493 8525 Cosmic 0800 389 5257 National Drugs Helpline 0800 77 66 00

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Kidscape 020 7730 3300 webinfo@kidscape.org.uk MENTAL HEALTH Antenna 020 8365 9537 www.antennaoutreach.co.uk info@antennaoutreach.co.uk

Hearthstone 020 8888 5362

Gary Flavell Ryan Alexander Mirella Issaias

Flo Codjoe David Warrington Vu Tran

is a registered trademark of Exposure Organisation Limited, registered in England no. 3455480, registered charity no.

1073922.

The views expressed in Exposure do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. (c) 2006. All rights reserved. ISSN 1362-8585 AWARDS Purple Youth Award for best youth representation website London Electricity Londoner of the Year Award Nationwide Award for Voluntary Endeavour Phillip Lawrence Award Ed & F Man Award for Best London Youth Publication ADVERTISING If your organisation wants to get its message across to young people call 020 8883 0260 PRINTERS Miter Press Ltd, Miter House, 150 Rosebery Avenue, N17 9SR Tel: 020 8808 9776

DISCLAIMER Exposure aims to give young people an independent voice which can contribute to the democratic process.

We apologise for any offence caused by the way young people choose to express themselves.

While Exposure has done its best to check material contained within this publication, we cannot accept responsibility for inaccurate information provided by outside organisations.

Organisations mentioned are not necessarily connected with nor endorsed by Exposure.

Permission has been sought, wherever possible, for the use of copyright material. Where contact has not been possible we hope that, as a voluntary organisation helping to educate and inform young people, it is acceptable for Exposure to use such material for the benefit of young people. If this is not the case please let us know and any such copyright material will be removed from future publications with our apologies.

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