CLASSIC (non-faith-based version): VOL 1

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GROW IN CONFIDENCE. KNOW YOUR IDENTITY.

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urney

FOR GIRLS


BRAVE & BEAUTIFUL (CLASSIC) Copyright © 2023 Releasing Generations Published by Releasing Generations Printed in the United States of America All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. All articles, art, and photographs have been published and printed with the permission of their creators.

ISBN: 979-8-9862965-2-4 Art Direction and Graphic Design: Ahava Design, LLC. Photos by Unsplash and Pixabay.

BRAVEANDBEAUTIFUL.WORLD Brave & Beautiful is a publication created by Explicit Movement, a Christian faith-based movement that heals and empowers youth and young adults to walk in sexual integrity and healthy relationships. We provide faith-based resources that equip youth, young adults, parents, and church leaders to have conversations concerning healthy dating and navigating sexuality issues with confidence, leading the way for young people to thrive in relationships. CREDITS (Pending) COVER Floral pattern: Maria Galybina. 4-5 Photography by Luminous: Emily Ganiko. Unsplash. 10 Louisa Wendorff/Austin Lord Photography 12-14 “Brave.” Merriam-Webster. com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, /brave. Accessed 17 Apr. 2021. “Beautiful.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, /beautiful. Accessed 17 Apr. 2021.


Dear Readers,

It is a fact that girls who believe they are important and have value, who are confident, who have a strong sense of hope, and who have goals for a positive future…are less vulnerable to falling victim to damaging and even dangerous situations. Having such positive attributes will help keep you from falling into the wrong hands, from becoming a victim of sexual violence, and becoming a victim of predators. Therefore, the reason for this publication is to build and lift you up to thrive! Knowing your value and worth will help you walk out your purpose! May each page impart encouragement, wisdom, hope, and practical tools for you to be emotionally healthy. You have a unique story. You have a unique design to who you are. We want to celebrate YOU during this time despite where your journey has taken you up to this point. Your joys, your pain and suffering, your loneliness, your heartbreak, your loving moments, and your victories matter. Your story can be woven together into something brave and beautiful that can change the world. SO! Jump in and be fascinated by your discoveries!

Blessings to you! Michele Okimura, Executive Director Explicit Movement

Brave & Beautiful. Take a moment to ask

What is my purpose? What is my name? What am I known for? Am I hidden in shame? Confident or Much Afraid. Lonely or Sad. Sunshine or Nervous. Rejected or Mad? Let hope fill your heart. Be refreshed in the new. Grow and bloom forth To be perfectly you. It’s time to ARISE! Beloved One, now. Finding your sparkle? Seek and learn how. New visions of life, You are created to see. Born Brave and Beautiful! You are destined to be.


REAL TRUTH.


REAL LOVE.


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Journey 01

Journey 02

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SHE IS BRAVE & BEAUTIFUL

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SHE RELEASES

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SHE DISCOVERS

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SHE STANDS

30 SHE ACCEPTS

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SHE CRIES

40 SHE BELIEVES

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SHE PERSEVERES

58 SHE EXPRESSES

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SHE PROTECTS

70 SHE SPARKLES

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SHE BLOOMS

76 SHE RESTS BRAVE & BEAUTIFUL


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Journey 03

Journey 04 Listen

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PORNOGRAPHY

20 SHE LOVES

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SEXUAL ABUSE & TRAUMA

30 SHE GIVES

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SEX TRAFFICKING

40 SHE DREAMS

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VOICES OF FREEDOM

48 SHE CREATES

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HOPE RISING

SHE CELEBRATES

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We are Explicit Movement. We know that youth and young adults around the world are hurting with insecurities about their identity and are often confused when it comes to the topic of sex and how to have healthy relationships. The struggle is intensified by often distorted views of sexuality and relationships promoted by pornography, the entertainment industry, and culture in general. Explicit is a faith-based organization that helps youth and young adults heal from abuse and empowers them to have healthy relationships. We want them to know their value and have a healthy concept of sex. We engage in real and relevant conversations and provide resources that honestly explore and equip teens, young adults, parents, and leaders on topics concerning healthy dating and navigating sexuality issues. We also care deeply about the issue of sex trafficking and want to empower youth with the awareness, knowledge, and practical tools to protect themselves.

OUR APPROACH

Join the Movement! Together we can

Our leadership team has decades of combined experience working with and supporting teens, young adults, parents, and church and community leaders. Over the past several years, we have witnessed the transformation of thousands of young people in Hawaii and across the world. You are not alone in your struggles.

visit us at ExplicitMovement.org

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PART 1

Embrace who you really are! What is of great importance is to know and embrace your immense value. You must not define your worth by what others say or even what negative things you may say about yourself. Your foundation must be built on the fact that you are special, unique, and important! It is from that place of knowing your worth that your values are formed and your decisions and choices are made. For example, if a girl believes she has little or no value, is not good enough and is unlovable, then you can imagine what kinds of choices she will make in life and the dangerous traps she can fall into. She has the potential to become vulnerable and fall prey to predators. These people commonly disguise themselves as loving and caring but are filled with malicious and selfish intentions. On the other hand, if a girl believes that she has incredible, infinite value—not with a prideful heart, but with a healthy self-love—then she is in position to fulfill her purpose and calling with strength, love, and confidence. She will make a difference in this world by touching and impacting lives for good along the way.

She is Brave & Beautiful She Discovers She Accepts She Believes

Welcome to the first section of this Brave and Beautiful Journey. This section will lay a solid foundation for you to build on. There are incredible things to discover about yourself that may even surprise you! You will learn to accept yourself as a uniquely designed individual that was never meant to be compared to anyone. You are a standalone masterpiece. You are like a diamond—you were designed to reflect specific brilliant facets that have never been revealed in history and will never shine upon this earth again. The challenge for you will be to not just know that you are valuable, but to believe it. This first section was created just for you to help truth to make its journey from your head to your heart. Enjoy your trek on this pathway of discovery and don’t forget to smell the roses along the way! If you open your heart, you will never be the same as you just may experience a miracle! Did you know that some of the most profound miracles are the miracles of the heart? This entire Journey was created with you in mind. Enjoy this gift. Will you begin this journey with child-like curiosity and wonder?

Ready. Set. Dive in beloved! 9


Brave Beauti s i e sh

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in the ordinary moments adds up

to an extraordinary, successful life.” ANDREA T. GOEGLEIN

B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E IS B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L

“All the bravery that lines our lives,

& e

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 01

tiful.


Brave brave

adjective. \ brāv \ braver; bravest

1.

having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty : having or showing courage

2. making a fine show : COLORFUL brave banners flying in the wind 3. EXCELLENT, SPLENDID

“Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am brave and worthy of love and belonging.” BRENÉ BROWN, RISING STRONG: HOW THE ABILITY TO RESET TRANSFORMS THE WAY WE LIVE, LOVE, PARENT, AND LEAD

How is Being Brave Like a Volcano?

H

ot lava seeps up from deep within the earth. In a similar way, courage erupts from deep inside, from a spirit of power, love, and wisdom within you! As you grow and discover the things that set your heart ablaze, passion and courage can become a stronger force that has the power to melt away fear and intimidation.

Red is often associated with war, strength, power, determination, passion and love.

The vibrant colors of red, orange and yellow combine in a dance of fire over your heart.

Yellow can stand for freshness, positivity, clarity, honor, and loyalty.

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Orange combines the energy of red and the joy of yellow and is known to represent enthusiasm, fascination, creativity, encouragement and success.


“Be fearless, because the world needs what you have to give.” EILEEN ANGLIN

Painting by Francis Oda

These attributes can describe the facets of bravery you need to live out your unique purpose. Lava also flows and creates new land, new ground. In a similar way, you have the power to not only reclaim ground that was stolen, but also make new ground and enlarge your territory and influence for good!

You are a brave-hearted woman, and this world needs your presence, passions, and talents! So be courageous, and fear not! “Courage is on display every day, and only the courageous wring the most out of life.” ZIG ZIGLAR You are a Brave-Heart!

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Beautiful beautiful adjective. beau·​ti·​ful | \ byü-ti-fəl \

1. having qualities of beauty : exciting aesthetic pleasure 2. generally pleasing : EXCELLENT

You are a beautiful darling! A beautiful sweetheart! You are beautiful beyond words!

Know you are a beautiful bloom in this world.

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How is Being Beautiful Like a Field of Flowers?

U

niversally, flowers are considered beautiful and are used to decorate and adorn people and places. There are literally thousands of various kinds of flowers in this world.

Fun Facts: Did you know that there are about 400,000 flowering plant species in the world? That is more than the types of bird and butterfly species

combined! For those of you who love roses, there are over 4800 types of roses known worldwide. Flowers come in almost every color imaginable: shades of white, red, blue, yellow, pink, purple, green, and orange! The shapes, sizes, and designs of flowers around the world seem limitless—yet they are all beautiful in their own unique way, just like the girls and women in the world! What is your favorite flower?

Tulips? Roses? Lilies?

Sunflowers? Peonies? Daisies? Carnations?

You, beautiful you, are also unique in design and color, gracing the planet with your very being. Many flowers release a sweet fragrance. Take a moment to reflect on the countless bottles of floral perfumes made from a floral essence. Do you have a favorite floral fragrance?

May your life release a sweet, pleasant, refreshing, fragrance wherever you go! One bloom is beautiful, but the scene of a field of many colorful flowers blooming together creates a breathtaking feast for the eyes! Bold and delicate, vibrant, and pastel, all swaying in the breeze on a moonlit night. Just as a standalone, single flower is magnificent by itself, there is another kind of beauty displayed when that flower is in a bouquet with other types of flowers. In a similar way, we can appreciate the beauty that emanates from the sisterhood of friends and family in our communities and around the world! Lastly, a field of flowers can be more beautiful than the most elegant of royal attire!

Beauty is being the best possible version of yourself on the inside and out.“ AUDREY HEPBURN

Painting by Danielle Iranon

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She Disco

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E D ISCOVERS

Life is also about

discovering your unique

and wondrous design!

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 02

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overs.


look at you girl! The world is waiting...

E

ver wonder why you were created? What is your purpose?

How do you discover your own unique path in life?

Yikes! Those distracting confusing voices can get us off track! There can be SO many voices screaming at us constantly about who we SHOULD be or what we SHOULD be doing! Pressures and expectations to be this or that can come from others or even ourselves!

Maybe you are known as

Let’s pull back the drapes. What is hiding behind the curtains when those labels and roles are stripped off? There is so much more to you than labels— labels are so limiting! There is so much untapped potential within you waiting to be discovered and explode forth! What do you base your worth on? The Truth: Your worth does not come from the kind of clothes you wear, how many friends you have, how talented you are in something, or even how high your grades are in school. It’s not even based on your ‘performance,’ though the world may speak this. Though

*the smart one *the serious one *the funny one *the creative one *the shy one *the crazy one *the stable one *the sporty

one *the artistic one *the expressive one *the laid back one, or *the bossy one.

tempting, be careful to not base your value on how many followers or likes you have on social media. You have a purpose far greater and wider than you could ever dream of. You are on a journey of discovering the complex and brilliant facets of you and the hidden gems placed within you! You, beautiful you! The world is waiting!

“The world is waiting for you, never give up on your dream(s). Arise and make an impact, there are people who are just waiting for your story which will give them a turn around in their lives.” WISDOM KWASHIE MENSAH

she is self-aware. The questions you ask yourself...matter!

B

eing self-aware is not a natural thing for people—it’s a skill to be practiced and learned! It is crucial to grow in our self-awareness so we can continue to grow and learn from our experiences. This makes it possible for us to make positive changes, make better choices, and understand ourselves. Being self-aware helps us get in touch with our emotions which can lead us to handle them in the best possible way

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rather than stuff them or react wildly to life situations without any thought.

Some helpful self-awareness questions:

Self-awareness also helps us to improve our relationships by growing in understanding of others and learning how to communicate more effectively.

At the beginning of each day, you can ask yourself:

Seek counsel when you reflect! Sometimes we do not know our own hearts—but if we process our thoughts with someone who really knows us and roots for us, like a trusted family member or mentor— they can share insights that may often surprise us!

• What kind of person do I want to be today? • What attribute do I want to grow in? (for example, patience or kindness) • What is the one thing I really want to accomplish today?


“Self-awareness gives you the capacity to learn from your mistakes as well as your successes. It enables you to keep growing.” Lawrence Bossidy

“If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.”

Daniel Goleman

"If you want to change and grow, then you must know yourself and accept who you are before you can start building."

"Until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life."

John Maxwell

Iyanla Vanzant

At the end of each day, you can ask yourself:

If you had a concerning incident, you can ask yourself:

• What went well today? • What did not go well—would I do anything differently? • What is something I learned or discovered today? • What is one thing I learned about myself today? • What 3 things am I grateful for?

• Why did I react that way? • How do I feel about that? • Why do I feel this way? Does it remind me of a past experience?

There are numerous self-reflection questions a person can ask themselves depending on the situation—but you can start with a few each day to grow in your own self-awareness!

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“You are worthy of love and respect. You are beautiful, gifted, and intelligent. Don't let the storm make you forget it.” – Russell T. Davies DISCOVER YOU! DO THIS. GETTING TO KNOW YOURSELF. What runs you down? Stresses you out? Makes you angry? Makes you afraid? Makes you sad? Makes you happy? I feel emotionally drained when:

I dislike:

I lack peace.

losing.

I am unhappy.

being wrong.

I don’t feel safe.

being in conflict with someone.

I feel overwhelmed by challenges.

being rejected.

I get excited and energized when: I get things done. I am getting along well with others. I am involved and gather others to join in. I gather facts and knowledge and am accurate. Do I :

I usually feel refreshed and energized when: Tend to see the cup half full (I tend to focus on the positive)

I am around people interacting with them.

Tend to see the cup half empty (I tend to focus on the negative)

When I have my alone time.

Rank 1-6, 1 being the number describing you most, and 6 being the number describing you least. I feel most loved by people when: They give me a gift.

They take time to do activities with me that I enjoy.

They give me a hug or physical affection.

They take time to listen to me and have quality conversations.

They say affirming, encouraging words to me verbally or written.

What makes you feel alive and sets your heart on fire?

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They do things for me.


SHE KNOWS HERSELF. YOUR DESIGN: KNOW THYSELF What builds you up?

What is that one thing that gives you energy?

What in particular do you have FUN doing?

What are 3-6 top things you value?

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” – Carl Jung “Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.” – Margaret J. Wheatley “Great leaders develop through a never-ending process of self-study, self-reflection, education, training, and experience.” – Tony Buon

doodle

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You're OK

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt We all have a desire to be liked, but confidence is

“ I will be fine even if they don’t”

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Whoa!

THERE WAS NO ONE EXACTLY LIKE YOU IN ALL OF HISTORY.

you are marvelous. Do you know your value? . . . Take time to ponder. Reflect on your strengths, gifts, and talents.

YOU ARE NOT A MISTAKE.

YOU ARE UNIQUE – ONE OF A KIND!

“WHAT LIES BEHIND YOU AND WHAT LIES IN FRONT OF YOU PALES IN COMPARISON TO WHAT LIES INSIDE YOU.” RALPH WALDO EMERSON

YOU ARE AN OVERCOMER.

YOUR VERY EXISTENCE IS A MIRACLE.

“BEING A SUCCESSFUL PERSON IS NOT NECESSARILY DEFINED BY WHAT YOU HAVE ACHIEVED, BUT BY WHAT YOU HAVE OVERCOME.” FANNIE FLAGG

YOU HAVE SOMETHING THAT ONLY YOU CAN GIFT TO THE WORLD.

YOU ARE LIKE A DIAMOND CREATED TO REFLECT FACETS OF BRILLIANCE THAT ONLY YOU CAN ILLUMINATE. "THERE HAS NEVER BEEN ANOTHER YOU. WITH NO EFFORT ON YOUR PART YOU WERE BORN TO BE SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL AND SET APART. WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO IN APPRECIATION OF THAT GIFT IS A DECISION ONLY YOU CAN MAKE."

THERE WILL NEVER BE ANYONE LIKE YOU IN THE FUTURE.

DAN ZADRA

WHOA.

“A POSSIBILITY WAS BORN THE DAY YOU WERE BORN AND IT WILL LIVE AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.” MARCUS SOLERO

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ACTIVITY

In addition to journaling with words, you can also do Mindful Doodling! Whether stick figures or intricate designs, release your creativity! Draw Yourself As A House. Then pause and reflect on what your drawing reveals to you about yourself.

Look over the list of

organized

resourceful

respect

adventurous

loving

words to the right.

free

loyal

imaginative

safe

compassion

Circle the words

creative

generous

independent

hard-working

persevere

that highlight in your

heart—words that you

strong

confident

brilliant

daring

overcoming

like and have positive

friendly

musical

intelligent

responsible

unity

humble

artistic

honest

successful

collaboration

brave

considerate

practical

helpful

ambitious

feelings about when you read them.

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WORD COLLAGE Write, print out, or cut out words that inspire you from old magazines or the newspaper—words that move you emotionally. (Feel free to include words you circled below)

competitive

mercy

flexible

healthy

humor

energetic

justice

capable

exciting

integrity

determined

trust

dynamic

devoted

spiritual

witty

wisdom

healing

excellence

genuine

fun

tolerant

encourage

kind

wild

peaceful

relaxed

beautiful

protect

action

joyful

faithful

bold

leader

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HEY GIRL!

time to get dressed!

W

hen you get ready in the morning, what is your routine? Of course, getting dressed for the day is part of the plan.

Did you ever consider yourself a princess? Many little girls imagine themselves as a princess—maybe you were one of them, or maybe not. Regardless of whether you can relate to the image of a princess, take a moment to consider looking at yourself as not only a princess, but a warrior princess. You see, we live in a world where there are both good and evil forces at work. You can see this in the daily news. There are great and good things that people do to better society and help people, and then there are issues of corruption, crime, and tragedies. So, in the midst of your teenage life when so much is going on, you need to be aware of this:

THERE IS THE BATTLE YOU MUST FIGHT IN. PRINCESS WARRIOR, PLANT YOUR FEET AND STAND STRONG IN WHAT IS GOOD AND TRUE. Your purpose is worth fighting for, and it is far greater than what your grades are, how great you look in your outfit or new haircut, your accomplishments, or how many awards you have won. That means...you don’t give up even though you might feel like it at times. So, girl, plant your feet on the ground and stand strong. Invest in growing as a person and gain wisdom from trustworthy, mature people around you.

Graphic by Constance Woods / ConstanceWoods.com

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We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot." ELEANOR ROOSEVELT

Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye." HELEN KELLER

FIGHT FROM A PLACE OF VICTORY. Imagine yourself as a girl with a sword, a Warrior Princess—the perfect combination of beautiful femininity and courageous strength. You are not only a Sweetheart, but you are also a Braveheart. Let’s get dressed ladies!

THREE FIERCE FIGHTERS: WARRIOR PRINCESSES Joni Eareckson was 17 when she misjudged the shallowness of the waters of Chesapeake Bay and took a dive. She severely injured her vertebrae leaving her paralyzed from the shoulders down. After her accident, she struggled with depression, suicidal thoughts, anger, and her spiritual beliefs. However, there finally came a time when she decided to fight for her purpose and refused to give up on life. She learned how to paint by holding a brush in her teeth, she became a singer recording several albums, wrote over 48 books—and even starred in a movie about her life! Among her many accomplishments, she was also awarded many prestigious awards for her work. Joni’s perseverance and ‘fight’ was truly inspirational, touching people all over the world. Malala Yousafzai was 15 when she was shot by the Taliban in Pakistan. Yet that did not silence her voice. She stood strong and courageously continued to be a strong advocate for girls’ education in Pakistan, winning her the Nobel Peace Prize in 2014. Being a fierce ‘warrior princess’ can mean fighting for the welfare of others. 14 year old Trisha Prabhu was so moved when she learned about a girl who killed herself after being bullied online. After many months of research, she invented a product called ReThink, which helps teens who are about to bully someone online, to reconsider such an action. During the test phase on 300 middle school and high schoolers, the results were that 93.4% of students were less likely to post their damaging messages! ReThink was the Grand Prize Winner of Harvard University's President's Innovation Challenge. ReThink has impacted tens of thousands of people! It takes courage to step out on a limb for others, and Trisha did it.

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the big reveal Poem by Michele okimura

SHE IS and is becoming… She is a magnificent intention. She is a chest full of treasures and gems. She is a masterpiece being painted. She is a priceless gift given at the perfect time. She is the sunshine on a gloomy day. She is a bundle full of ideas and creativity. Her intelligence sparks innovation and solutions. Her voice is worthy to be heard. Her dreams matter. Her kindness and compassion heals and restores. She is a beacon of hope, integrity, and justice. She ignites joy. She greets each day with positive expectation. She discovers new mountains to conquer. She soars with strength on eagle’s wings. She was born for such a time as this. She is a glorious mystery being revealed. And so much more... Who is this sign and wonder? Yes, she is you!

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ENJOY YOURSELF and BE YOU

REFLECTION What lines from the poem especially touch your heart?

Which lines do you like and aspire to be more of?

Which lines are hard to believe about yourself?

We are all in the process of ‘becoming.’ It is a life-long process, so be intentional yet patient with yourself!

“You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.” MAYA ANGELOU

Write down a few lines from the poem that stood out to you and take a minute to meditate on them, soaking them into your heart. Remember, we are all in the process of becoming better versions of ourselves. Even if you could not see yourself in these ways—there is so much potential within you. Remember, growing is a process and takes time and intention.

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She Acce

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E ACCEPTS

”Being authentic begins with unconditional self-acceptance—imperfections and all.” AZIM JAMAL AND BRIAN TRACY

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 03

epts.


Do you have a difficult time accepting yourself or parts

of yourself? What are barriers that prevent you from fully embracing who you are?

One of the quickest ways to become discouraged, envious, or intimidated is to compare yourself to others. Learn 5 KEYS to accepting yourself and be FREE from the Comparison Trap!

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THE COMPARISON TRAP BY LEILA FUJINAKA CERTIFIED JOHN MAXWELL LEADERSHIP COACH

I

’m so excited you’ve started your journey!

For many years I damaged my selfesteem by constantly comparing myself to others, and I didn’t even realize it! I often found myself trying to be someone I was not. I denied my true identity and uniqueness by shrinking back and being less just so I could be like the person I compared myself to. I tried to hide my flaws and compared my weaknesses to other people’s strengths. Once I learned about the negative power that comparing myself to others had over me, I searched for keys to break out of this trap and committed to change! This freedom is available to you too.

1. STARVE THE MONSTER: Protect your thoughts from negativity.

Do you define yourself through the lens of a mean inner critic leading you to compare yourself to others?

A negative outlook influences your thoughts and magnifies your shortcomings. This impact is a trap! It can take hold and make it hard for you to change the way you view yourself.

In today’s world, negative influences primarily come from other people, news, media, and social media. In fact, more than 50% of news and 62% of social media is negative! Friends and family can affect your self-esteem and mess with your inner thoughts, leaving you discouraged about your future and life.

2. OWN IT!! MISFIT IS YOUR SWEET SPOT!

Ever feel like a misfit? Do you find when comparing yourself to others you try to copy what others do or think, only to realize that’s just not you?

This is a common pitfall of unique individuals who feel like misfits. They feel like they don’t fit in even when they try their hardest to. Each of us is created to see the world in our own way, with unique ways of thinking or displaying a unique personality. If you find yourself feeling like a fish out of water, find a new stream, one that suits you. If you’ve spent a lot of time comparing yourself to others, it will most likely take a bit of time for you to adjust your perspective and create a new ‘ideal you’. You may discover your true self for the first time!

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3. Get personal with gratitude!

Are you aware of how much time is lost when focused on comparing yourself to other people? Comparison takes your eyes off your goals and can cause you to feel bad about how you’re doing. When we focus on other people's paths rather than our own, we lose perspective on where we are headed and lose sight of the progress we’ve made.

Perfection comparison can cause us to feel helpless, stressed, or shameful. However, failures and mistakes, though painful in the moment, can be a great help to us if we’re able to learn from them and make needed adjustments. Everyone experiences failure. If you’ll allow yourself to be mentored by your mistakes, you’ll be further ahead than your counterparts. Give yourself grace and patience in the process. Learn to accept your role in the failure but don’t stew in the negative emotions! You can move forward with more wisdom and insights that you gained.

Take the time to look at what you’ve accomplished so far and measure yourself against yourself, not another person. Be grateful for the many things you have in your life. Trade the trap of comparison for inner acceptance and contentment.

“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” MAYA ANGELOU

4. Pick yourself back up after failure.

5. Seriously! Cultivate self-awareness!

Ouch! Ever made some pretty huge mistakes or experienced painful failures? I have.

Do you find you are defensive? Controlling? Are you unable to recognize how other people experience you?

Have you ever compared yourself to those you think have never made those same mistakes?

When we improve our self-awareness, we find that we will become more comfortable with who we are. Selfawareness is not something you are born with, it’s a skill you practice and develop!

Get this: Embarrassment from a failure is NOT the end of the world!

If you struggle with comparing yourself to others, know that you are not alone in this struggle. Comparison can rear its ugly head at any given moment no matter what age you are, but it doesn’t have to be that way. My greatest joy would be that you would implement some of the points in this article and begin developing selfawareness to know when comparison is trying to hook you once again. You are a powerful, young woman with so much to conquer ahead of you AND so much to offer the world. You do not have to look or be like someone else. In fact, the world is tired of phony. Comparing ourselves pushes us towards being phony. Be on a mission to embrace your unique personality, your unique style, and unique characteristics. There isn’t anyone like you...so live out your uniqueness courageously!

“ “ “

Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself.” COCO CHANEL

A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms.” ZEN SHIN

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” RALPH WALDO EMERSON

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“Don’t let your mind bully your body.” - JUNE TOMASO WOOD

ACCEPT & APPRECIATE YOUR BODY What do you like about your body? What don’t you like about your body?

Some people are blind, deaf, or without limbs. Some people have lost their sense of taste or smell. Some people have heart problems. What would change in your life if you focused on what your body CAN do rather than on your looks?

You may not like certain parts of your body—yet your body, no matter what size, color, or build—is part of who you are. Grow in accepting yourself fully!

BE THANKFUL FOR YOU! Write down 3 things you are thankful for about your physical body : personality :

character :

values :

When thoughts of comparison come up, celebrate the great qualities you already do have!

ACCEPT EVERY PART OF YOU!

“Resolve never to criticize or downgrade yourself, but instead rejoice that you are fearfully and wonderfully made.” – ELIZABETH GEORGE “Change is possible, but it must start with self-acceptance.” – ALEXANDER LOWEN

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List 10 things you love about yourself. Do one a day if you want to.

1. I love

2. I love

3. I love

4. I love

5. I love

6. I love

7. I love

8. I love

9. I love

10. I love

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Write down nice things people have said about you. Choose one thing to meditate on each day.

Draw yourself as a flower.

doodle 37


TREASURE BY LEA HANASHIRO

I hate my red, frizzy hair!!!

T

his was the first thought I had every time I looked in the mirror. I was totally convinced by society that boys were attracted to girls with brown or blonde hair, not red hair. All my friends had blonde or brown hair and boyfriends. So why would a boy ever look at me and say “She’s hot, I wanna go out with her!”? Then came college and I found myself just hoping I would catch someone’s eye enough to ask me out. Every time I would compare myself to another girl, there was always something I wanted to change about me. It took me awhile to realize that I was actually judging my own self! This led me down a road full of fear, negative thoughts, and self-hatred. What was I afraid of? Deep down I was afraid of not being good enough for someone to love. Believing that to be true left me vulnerable to a bad relationship or being taken advantage of! I had to learn new thoughts about myself that would lead me to a place of feeling loved, knowing I am lovable, and believing that there is someone special who would love every part of me. Out of

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these truths, I could live every day more confident in my true self. What is the lie that swarms around you every day when you look at yourself in the mirror or when you compare yourself to the girls around you? What is that lie that keeps you disconnected from people or causes you to be overwhelmed by fear and anxiety rather than being the young and free woman you were created to be? Perhaps you hear this in your head: “I’m not pretty or thin enough to be desired by someone.” Or even “I’m not lovable.” With whatever confusing thoughts you’re struggling with today, I encourage you to focus on the truth that you are a young woman and a treasure worthy to be seen and known by the world.

Ways to Treasure Yourself Treasure your thoughts: Your thoughts are powerful and can inspire

you if you focus on the positive. If you have dark thoughts, you can choose not to dwell on them. You can problem solve, help a friend, innovate, and think of creative ideas—wonderful thoughts that make a difference! Treasure your emotions and feelings: Observe your emotions. Grow in self-awareness of what you are feeling so you can take steps to grow and become emotionally healthy. Pay attention to your intuition—for example, note that gut feeling you have when something seems wrong or dangerous, or an amazing opportunity or idea to act upon! Treasure your body: Although there may be aspects of your body that you may not like, reflect on aspects of your body that you can treasure and be thankful for! Can you see? Some people are blind. Can you hear? Some people are deaf. Can you walk? Some people cannot walk. Can you taste? Some people have lost their sense of taste. Treasure your body.


but I want it!

I

know. Sometimes it can be hard to accept things the way things are right now, right? Ever feel unsatisfied? Restless? Hopeless? Bored? Ok, let’s be honest. I am sure there are relationships and circumstances in your life that you wish were very different. It can be hard to simply accept things that need to be accepted and find peace in your life. It can be a challenge to be content with your • situation • skills and abilities • looks and personality • wardrobe Let’s admit it! Many of us like nice things, popular things, stylish things, and things that our friends have that we don’t have! We live in a consumer

culture that lures us to always want more, more, more! Wanting more is not necessarily a bad thing, but it can be damaging when our top goals are to fulfill those desires. Through all the life lessons and growing pains we experience, we can attempt to find contentment and peace each day with what we do have. Are you content with who you are and who you are becoming? Yup! There sure is a tension between taking action steps to grow, stretch, improve, and advance, and being at peace and satisfied with how things are. By changing our perspective, we can find peace in the moment and accept what we cannot change... at least right now. There is also the element of patience and timing to consider in our longings.

Seeking to be fulfilled by ‘things’ may give us a temporary high, but in the end it will leave us still thirsty for more. Let’s aim to grow in contentment and gratitude in the midst of our sometimes chaotic world.

“It’s almost impossible to be satisfied in your own life if you’re constantly looking at what someone else has.” RACHEL CRUZE, FINANCIAL EXPERT

“Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want but the realization of how much you already have.” ANONYMOUS

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She Believ

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E B ELI EVES

"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities!

Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own

ves.

powers you cannot be successful or happy." NORMAN VINCENT PEALE

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 04

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Declare the following statements, pausing after each one, and allow yourself to feel it!

I am uniquely and wonderfully designed. I am a treasure. I am released to dream. I have permission to be me. I have courage to try new things. I have permission to fail. I learn from my experiences. I am called forth to create good things. I love myself for who I am and who I am becoming. I have greatness within me to make a positive difference.

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The point is, who told you? Was it a family member? Was it a classmate? Was it yourself?

THE TRUTH:

You have immense and incredible value. You were planned and purposed. You are NOT a mistake.

who told you? Exchanging lies for the truth

She understood her worth which made her powerful. The world gravely needed a hero so she became one. No superpowers really, just a strong woman who took no nonsense from anyone.” RANDALL CORE

Many of us have grown up having people around us label us, reject us, call us names, and put us down through words and actions. Sometimes we judge ourselves and tell ourselves lies that contradict the truth of our immense and incredible value. Who told you, you weren’t good enough? Who told you, you are worthless? Who told you, you are not loved? Did anyone ever put a negative label on you? “People will try to label you not good enough, too slow, too old, too many mistakes. You can’t stop negative comments or prevent negative labels, but you can choose not to let them hold you back.” JOEL OSTEEN

An experiment was done in a high school class where each student wrote the words, “I am SPECIAL,” on a sheet of paper. In the next 24 hours, if someone said or did something that was

somewhat hurtful, they would tear off a portion of that sheet that represented how much the action or words ripped at the statement that they were special. By the next class period, the students were to share what their sheets looked like. The result was that the vast majority of the class had little, or NO sheets of paper left! Negativity in the world we live in abounds. HOWEVER, we must be careful about judging ourselves and believing lies about who we are. Hold on to the truth that you are special and valued!

Try out this quick activity! You will need two sheets of paper.

1. On one of the sheets of paper, write down a list of negative words you would use to describe yourself (could be words such as ugly, not-good-enough etc.). Write whatever comes to mind. These are negative judgments or labels you have put on yourself. 2. Next, on the other sheet of paper, make a new list of words that are opposite, positive words from the list of negative words you first made. These positive words represent your value and your potential!

3. Next, crumple up the first sheet of paper with the negative words and throw it away. 4. Meditate on the list of positive words and for each word, say, “I am .” Declare the positive about yourself. Even if you don’t quite believe the statements fully, there is power in you speaking out these positive statements! You want to renew your mind in how you think about yourself. The negative beliefs only serve to hinder your amazing potential within you!

Jot down 3 of your favorite positive, affirming words in this box:

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FASHIONED FOR LOVE BY NANCY VUU

Nancy Vuu is a Dreamer. Because she dreams, profound creativity is expressed through her luxury fashion brand. Nancy Vuu Inc. Couture Designs continues to grace red-carpet events such as the Grammy’s, American Music Awards, and films. In addition, her designs have been featured in Vogue, Harper’s Bazaar and Elle magazines around the globe.

Now she shares her story with Brave & Beautiful on how she found her true value and worth that “qualifies the un-qualified to greatness.”

fashion. It all began when I was a young girl. I dreamed of one day becoming a fashion designer. As I grew up, I forgot about this dream. One day, everything changed as I was reminded of my dream while attending a women’s conference where I had a profound spiritual experience! Suddenly, in this room filled with thousands of women, I heard an audible voice asking, “Do you know your daughter?” When the voice spoke, immediately everything shut down, I could not see or hear anyone or anything else in the room. All I could hear was this voice, and I saw a vision of a big scroll roll out in front of my eyes. As the scroll opened, I saw my older daughter’s face. I replied, “Of course I know my daughter, that’s Isabella.” The voice replied, “Well, your daughter, along with every other little girl in America, dreams of wearing these exquisite gowns simply to be a princess. Then I saw my daughter twirling with the most exquisite gown. I replied, “That’s so true!” Every girl wants to be a princess who is loved, valued, and has dignity.

Hello Brave & Beautiful one! I am so excited to share with you how an ordinary girl like me who did not qualify as ‘great’ in the public eye, became a special ambassador in the world of

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The voice came back and asked, “What about all the other children in the world who all long to be a princess, but they can’t even fathom wearing a gown. They are thinking about whether or not they

are going to live, have food, and shelter.” Then I saw children from all different nations who were very sick, who did not have food or water. These children were abandoned and abused. My heart sunk as I felt like I was carrying the weight of the world. The voice came back again, and instructed me, “Start designing, and tell these little girls that no matter what their circumstances are, they are loved and are true princesses! At this point, I did not know how to sew or know anyone in the fashion industry, but I replied, “Wow! What a great idea!” My heart said a big “yes” to the dream. I now work in the fashion industry to clothe children and young ladies to remind them of their incredible true value and immense worth! To this day, I still do not know how to sew, but I have been on wonderful adventures where I have the privilege to clothe young ladies like yourself, celebrities, and royal family members. It’s not only our own gifts and talents that qualify us to do great works. Yes, we can use those things too, but it is our love for others and our calling to a higher purpose that qualifies us. Though I had forgotten about my dreams of becoming a fashion designer as a little girl, my dream came back to


myself. I said, “No, that will never happen. I’m not even a real designer and I don’t even know how to sew!” But in that moment, that same voice that I heard the day at the conference spoke again to me saying, “No! You are a designer. I made you to be a designer, now move in your role!” Immediately when I heard those words, it was as if a blanket of truth and identity floated from the sky and gently fell on me. I was able to believe that I was meant to be a fashion designer and knowing this has enabled me to walk out my purpose and destiny with confidence and perseverance. How many times have we let our friends, family or the world rob us of this truth? Or even worse, how many times have we disqualified ourselves? We must learn how to silence the lies that say we are not good enough. Instead, we need to believe that we are precious treasures, and we have something beautiful and brilliant to give to this world. Do you know what you were made for? I firmly believe you are fashioned for love and greatness. Believe that you have a noble purpose and that you have a hope and a future worth pursuing. I declare to you: “May you go forth in strength & courage to pursue your dreams and calling!” life years later! I now know my calling and purpose to fulfill this amazing dream. I believe the dreams and passions we have reside deep within us – we just need to discover them over time. I want to encourage you to share your dreams with your parents or trusted

mentor and explore ways to pursue your dreams in an honorable way. You are fashioned for love and greatness! I remember one time; I experienced another vision of being a worldrenowned designer styling royal families. I rejected the vision at first. I disqualified

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Be BY NANCY VUU

This Brave and Beautiful being you see here is an inspired vision I had of a young girl entering womanhood. I saw her clothed in the exquisite beauty and extravagance of the finest garden. Grace and strength were upon her, and she had no fear of the future as she held a sword representing truth and proudly wore her golden crown. She knew how to walk in her power as a confident, wise, and brave young woman. She also knew when to stand firm in what is good and true. She was a mighty princess warrior. Wherever she went, she released beauty and strength to the world. This Brave and Beautiful being lives within us. She is you. She is me. She is clothed in roses & flowers. Her couture garden gown reminds us that we are like a garden full of luscious life within us. She displays unmatched beauty because her beauty is one-of-a-kind and unique to her. She is adorned with a crown as her immense value is etched in her mind and heart. She carries a sword of truth that disarms the negative attacks that come against her. She moves forward in combat boots ready,

Credits: Creative Director: Nancy Vuu www.nancyvuu.com info@nancyvuu.com Illustrator: H. Ashour

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On page 48, color this same image and bring it to life in your own way. It can symbolically represent brave and beautiful you!

prepared and positioned to flow in fierce love, greatness, and victory. Her body and hair is made of olive leaves that bring healing and comfort to herself, her family, her community and to the nations. May the brave and beautiful spirit within you arise, for you are born and positioned for such a time as this to your generation. May you radiate LOVE & GREATNESS to those around you!


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Reflect and journal any insights you gained while coloring the previous page. Why did you choose those particular colors as you brought your image to life? In what ways does this image depict beauty and bravery to you? Journal freely!

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YOU ARE AN IMPORTANT PIECE BY MARGARET VESNEFSKI

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I

n 7th grade my family and I moved from Southern California to Taipei, Taiwan where my parents grew up. I was completely devastated. I had finally found my group of friends and the thought of making new friends in a foreign place sounded next to impossible.

Barely into the first three months of starting school, I was off to a record start. Within a short span of time, I had managed to projectile vomit all over the screen in health class while trying to run out of the room with my hands unsuccessfully covering my mouth. Weeks later, feeling like I missed the bandwagon on getting my period when it happened to all the girls around me, I suddenly felt a gushing sensation in my panties in English class. When I looked down, I had leaked blood onto my floral pink jumper and left an obvious stain on the beige chair when I got up. Back then, it seemed like everything terrible happened to me more than anyone else. All I longed for was to fit in and not to stand out. But for whatever reason, I kept standing out in all the ways I didn’t want to. The more I tried to be like everyone else, the more it would backfire. I even got a boyfriend, held hands, and played truth or dare because I thought that was what I was supposed to do. Instead, I was constantly getting my feelings hurt. Since my parents weren’t home that often, I would blast

my music and cry in the bathroom so no one could hear me. I felt like I was an awkward piece of a jigsaw puzzle that was put in the wrong box. Years later, I began noticing this phenomenon—things happened backwards for me! Hard things were easy, and simple things that made sense to others were hard for me. Sometimes, I would struggle with an overwhelming sense of loneliness, and I would feel it the most when I was surrounded by my family. I always felt like I wanted to escape somehow. However, I began to take notice of the times I did make positive contributions that mattered to others around me. Overtime, I came to realize that I am an important piece in this world! Sometimes you may question why you are a certain way in your personality, your physical attributes, and even the family you are born into. I want to encourage you that you are an important piece that can specifically influence others, change lives, and impact the world. So hang on to all the spaces and places in you that you might not like at the moment or think are special. Be patient with yourself.

All of us, at some time or other, need help. Whether we're giving or receiving help, each one of us has something valuable to bring to this world. That's one of the things that connects us as neighbors— in our own way, each one of us is a giver and a receiver." FRED ROGERS

IS A JIGSAW PUZZLE COMPLETE WITH ONE PIECE MISSING? NO. “You are part of a puzzle in someone's life. You may never know where you fit. But, someone's life may never be complete without you in it.” ANONYMOUS

You are an ever-blooming, unique, and stunning masterpiece!

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“I am not concerned with outer obstacles, only the inner ones.” ANNE COLEMAN LADD, SCULPTOR

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t u o h s ut! o

I AM Declarations Take a moment in silence. Close your eyes. Think about positive words you would love to believe

more about yourself. Write down positive words or descriptions. Examples: I am courageous. I am

loved. I am a light like the brightest star in a dark night. Quickly write down whatever positive words come into your mind!

After you are done writing, speak these statements out loud regularly. This can help solidify the truth of your value and help you to believe! There is power in your written and spoken words.

I am I am I am I am I am I am I am

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M IND F UL LET T ERING Trace the lettering - it does not have to be perfect! Enjoy the process of creative lettering

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Action Steps

YOU GO GIRL! LET’S WALK IT OUT. she is Brave & Beautiful you!

••

She is BRAVE AND BEAUTIFUL. She DISCOVERS. She ACCEPTS. She BELIEVES.

CHOOSE ONE OR MORE OF THE FOLLOWING ACTIONS STEPS:

1. In Ghana, West Africa, it is customary for people

to say, “It’s true. Thank you!” whenever someone

3. Create an identity statement—one sentence that

reflects at least one of the many facets of who you

compliments them on anything. The next time

aspire to be. Make it a positive statement, as you

someone gives you compliment, respond by saying,

are a gift to this world. After writing it, say it out

“Thank you!” In this way, you can pro-actively affirm

loud daily for one whole month. You may decide to

your value and worth. A compliment is like a gift, so

continue this activity each month with a new positive

receive it with gratitude and do not reject it!

statement. Using a word-picture like an animal or

2. Write in depth for 5-10 minutes about one of the values that you hold dear. It could be you value

family, a loyal friend, a skill or talent you have, or an attribute like honesty or justice—anything in particular that you value. OR Make a list of the values that are most important to you. This affirmation activity can help you to believe that you have immense worth. What you value matters—it is part of

object can be helpful in communicating your heart. Examples of this are: • I am sunshine giving hope to the hopeless. • I am a lioness that is brave and protects the weak. • I am a creative problem solver that makes a difference.

your identity and your contribution to the world!

1-888-373-7888

TOLL-FREE HOTLINE | 24/7 CONFIDENTIAL

Get Help Report Trafficking

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PART 2

You have a voice that is meant to be heard. Finding your own roar and unique expression is a

Do you make space for rest that restores and refreshes

journey and a process of discovery. You have a voice

your weary body and soul? Giving yourself that much-

literally and figuratively to make a positive difference

needed pause to reflect and restore your balance and

and declare what is good and true in this world!

positive energy is wise and healthy!

You are meant to express yourself!

Welcome to this second section of Brave and Beautiful

You were designed to express yourself in sometimes quiet, unassuming, tender ways, and other times loud, bold, and public ways. You never know when one of your spontaneous, profound moments will reveal the

where you will be encouraged and learn ways to embrace and treasure: • more of YOU and the unique ways YOU enjoy expressing yourself

treasures inside of you.

• the practice of rest

You were meant to sparkle!

Continue your journey with positive expectation.

You will gain ways to celebrate your unique and beautiful sparkle. You. A radiant, shining star. Sparkle! Glitter! Glow! Twinkle! Go light up this world!

What treasures will you discover? May your eyes and ears be attentive, so you won’t miss the gems along your path!

You also have a mind and body that are meant to have a rhythm of rest. Let’s pause.

“When the whole world is silent, even one voice can be powerful.”

It may seem unnatural or uncomfortable to prioritize

MALALA YOUSAFZAI

rest, since many of our lives are immersed in the hustle. Some of us may even crave the hustle and feel compelled to always run at full speed. We live in a world full of distractions, pressures, expectations, and unexpected trials. It can be second nature for us to want to always pursue the next thing! Other priorities often compete with what is most healthy for us.

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She She She

Expresses Sparkles Rests

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She Expres

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E EXPRESSES

You have a voice. Nobody else on the planet

has your unique voice, your mind, your heart,

your story, or your hopes and dreams.

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 05

sses.


seven ways to express you! Write it! Draw it! Paint it! Make it! Dance it! Capture it!

Y

ou are unique. And how you love to naturally express yourself will be unique too. Sometimes just talking out your thoughts or feelings can’t seem to fully express what is in your heart—but maybe baking a dessert, singing a song, painting a picture, dancing it out, or taking a photo hits the spot!

1. Write a poem

Maybe you want to express a value, conviction, a certain positive message to others or maybe just something private for yourself.

It can rhyme or not rhyme. It can follow a pattern or not.

Journaling is always a great ‘go to’ way to express yourself, but sometimes journaling sentences may not quite do it for you. But writing a poem, for instance...maybe then the words might flow out like a river. Here are some possible ways you can explore expressing yourself. Why not try some new expressions? You may just discover something new about yourself!

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Poetry can allow you to freely express your feelings without the constraints of needing to use correct grammar. You can even make your poem into something artistic to look at. One word repeated, or a phrase or question can be expressed randomly. Be inspired and freely write!

Poetry can be especially helpful to write during intense, sad, and difficult times or immense, joyful times because it can help you release those deep, dark or excited and exuberant feelings you have.

volumes and move the heart. Photos and videos often can be a blessing to others. Capture a moment by taking a photo or video with your smartphone or camera when something is highlighted to you or when you are inspired to do so. Attach a meaning to that moment. Consider taking a moment to interpret the photo as it can express an inspirational message.

3. paint or sketch it

Painting or sketching can be a great way to express yourself. Whether you are more realistic or abstract, there are no rules! Even painting a canvas one color can mean something to you!

2. film it or take a photo

You can express yourself in a multitude of ways! It has been said, “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

The famous artist Pablo Picasso said, “Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.”

A photo or a video captures a moment, and the interpretation of it can speak

Unlike what teachers can sometimes teach you about coloring within the


lines, I challenge you to color outside of the lines! Expand the possibilities! There are no rules when you are creating a painting or sketch—be as free and as wild as you want to be! Have courage to express yourself through this visual way. Try releasing your feelings and thoughts in this way and see what happens. Have fun experimenting!

4. make it

Maybe some of you like to build things, sculpt things, produce a film, bake things, put together something graphically, or craft things...the list goes on! Something you make can express your thoughts and emotions in a tangible, symbolic way—especially if you like to work with your hands. Many different types of materials or media can be used! How you decorate cookies or cupcakes can also be considered mini sculptures. Arranging flowers from your garden can express a message using the colors and designs you choose! There are unlimited

ways to express a thought or emotion through your ‘creations.’ Attach meaning to them.

5. dance it

For some of us, dancing it out releases what is inside of us! Whether hip hop, popping, ballet, hula, jazz, lyrical styles, contemporary or cultural dances... or just however—go for it! You don’t have to be a professional to dance. It is interesting that you don’t have to ‘teach’ a toddler to dance—they just start moving their bodies to the beat of a song. Most cultures, if not every culture, have their own form of dance. Maybe we were all made to dance in our own way? Dancing does not always need to be a formal performance in front of people. It can be an authentic expression from within. Consider playing a favorite song that expresses your emotions and dance to it! Even doing a ‘happy dance’ for a few minutes when something amazing

happens can bring a release of the joy inside of you.

6. play your instrument or sing a song

Making melody can be an effective way to express our hearts. Singing a sad song when we are sad or singing a happy song when we are happy can bring great expression. Playing a beat on a drum can express joy or anger—or playing a certain melody on any instrument can be a ‘voice’ that can powerfully and simply express our heart and mind without words. Play whatever melody comes out freely. Or sing a song while just making up the melody and words in the moment. Explore new ways of expressing yourself through music.

7. write a story or a script

Whether writing a fictional story to express yourself or journaling a real account with real emotions, writing can get what is inside of you onto paper.

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express yourself. You have a story to tell...

You have a voice.

“I want to write, but more than that I want to bring out all kinds of things that lie buried deep in my heart. I can shake off everything as I write; my sorrows disappear, my courage is reborn.”

Keep this in mind as you go through Brave and Beautiful.

ANNE FRANK, DIARIST

Journaling, writing down your thoughts, is one of the most profound practices! It can help you connect with your deepest feelings and help process and work out difficult, even painful situations. It may help you discover creative solutions and fresh insights you didn’t know you had within you. It also is recording your story, your personal history, that is being written with each new day.

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We know your life can be busy and it is challenging to start a new habit, but journaling can change your life! Whether you journal on your computer or write with pen and paper, you can start with simple and small baby steps.

From whispers to a roar Just maybe your soft whispers will turn into a mighty roar that impacts this world in ways you couldn’t even imagine


HOW TO BEGIN

Start with writing about anything you want to write about.

Reflect on your day.

Pick a time of day that is best for you to write.

What are your feelings and thoughts?

If you don’t know how to begin, make a list of things you are grateful for.

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“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we’ll ever do.” - Brené Brown THE POWER OF YOUR STORY Think back over the different stages of your life. Recall significant and memorable experiences. The events in your unique life story shaped who you are today. On this timeline, from birth to present, graph and label 3-5 significant events in your life that are positive memories. Also mark and label 3-5 significant negative events in your life that had caused you emotional pain. • What were your greatest successes? • Was it an individual success or a team success? • When did you feel most excited? Recall the greatest challenges and painful times you had to overcome.

BIRTH

PRESENT

*Use the space above and below the timeline for your recordings.

How did you feel doing this timeline activity?

How did each experience change you? What did you learn from each experience you recorded?

Looking at your timeline, you see the hills and valleys of life you experienced. Do you notice any themes or patterns? If so, make note of them here:

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“Vulnerability is the center of shame, scarcity, fear, anxiety, and uncertainty. But it is also the birthplace of love, belonging, and joy.” - Brené Brown

Meditate on your timeline for a moment. Do you notice anything? Is there something you never saw or realized before? If so, what is highlighted to you?

COURAGE TO BE VULNERABLE It can be scary to reveal our personal secrets or things about ourselves that we would rather hide from others. It takes courage to express such details. Being vulnerable and sharing transparently with safe, trustworthy people builds connections that can heal and lift off toxic shame from our lives. Being vulnerable can give us the help and strength we need to blossom in life!! It is a powerful and meaningful experience to feel heard—for someone to know the good, the bad, and even the ugly about your life, and still love and accept you without judgment. When this happens, we can experience tangible love through someone else. So how do you know when to share and with whom? The following are some helpful clues to know some of the characteristics of a safe person. • Someone who is non-judgmental and accepts you as you are • Someone who will speak the truth in love to you • Someone who loves you no matter what you do • Someone who you feel comfortable being yourself with • Someone who believes in you • Someone who is encouraging and comforting • Someone who is a good listener • Someone who can keep what you share confidential (not someone who gossips) Vulnerably expressing yourself to people with whom you feel safe, such as a parent, close family member, close friend, mentor, or counselor, can bring you the support needed to navigate through the twists and turns of life.

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fun & fearless fashionista! How we dress expresses something unique about us.

W

e all have our own style of dress. What is your favorite outfit? Some of us go for comfort and like the casual, sporty, simple or free-spirited look, some of us like to dress creatively, some like the well-tailored look, some of us like the frilly dresses. We each express ourselves uniquely.

Ever wonder how the way we dress may tie into our own desires to be noticed? For some of us, we can dress to impress, to get noticed, or to feel like we belong. You can be beautifully stylish on the outside, but how are you ‘clothed’ on the inside?

“Beauty is a radiance that originates from within and comes from inner security and strong character." JANE SEYMOUR

How about ‘clothing’ yourself with the following:

compassion kindness humility

gentleness patience forgiveness

love strength dignity

Look carefully at the list above that describe some facets of inner beauty. Out of the list above, what are the attributes that you easily display? Which aspects would you like to grow in? Think of someone you would describe as having a beautiful heart or radiates a noticeable inner beauty and elegance. Let your inner beauty shine brightly. Outer beauty will fade over time with age, but inner beauty can last a lifetime, touch lives, and leave a meaningful legacy.

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May you radiate the sunshine within you! Be uniquely stylish! ‘Clothe’ yourself with the right things!

JOURNAL Out of the list below, what are the top three attributes you feel you need to ‘clothe’ yourself with today?

*compassion * kindness * humility * gentleness * patience * forgiveness * love * strength * dignity

Take a moment to reflect on how you can creatively express these attributes this week. Briefly journal your plan of actions here:

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THE POWER OF WORDS BY FIONA CUSTER

I

’m not sure when I started journaling, but I remember doing it as a tween. I had so many thoughts and feelings bottled up that needed to spill out somehow, and typically they found their way into the world through words on a page. I started a lot of entries with “Dear Fiona…” followed by questions to my future self, such as, “Did you ever meet your celebrity crush? Did you get married?” I also journaled a lot about the feelings I had about my parents and my friends. Sometimes I would even write entries that were like poems, creatively expressing my deep love and gratitude for different moments I’d had in life. I loved using words to express myself.

As I got older, I realized that I also loved using words to express how I felt about my friends or boyfriends. I would write notes, long emails or just tell those closest to me how much I loved or appreciated them. In my early adult years, I found myself in jobs where powerful and convincing words were keys to success. Whether I was selling clothes, helping people choose which meal to order as a server, or guiding women to find the right skincare, words mattered. One of my favorite ways

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to use the gift of words was to coach women through childbirth. I was a doula (labor coach) for seven years. Through words, I was able to empower, encourage and surround women with the support they needed to bring their little ones earth side. On my way to each birth, I always sought wisdom for the right words at the right time. Specific words affect people in specific ways. I wanted to be sure to use the best words for each mom as I served them with my presence and words while they gave birth. And you know what’s awesome? You can tap into the gift and power of your words right NOW! Your words can make an impact. There are people all around you that are desperate to hear encouragement, truth, hope and joy. We are all given the responsibility to steward our words wisely. Words can leave an imprint on someone’s heart for their entire life. The good ones and most definitely the bad ones. You can use your gift of words creatively in so many ways - either to build up those around you or tear them down. Be mindful of when negative or hurtful

words want to flow out of you. Once they are out, they can never be brought back in. Words have power to give life, create realities, and damage hearts… sometimes for years to come. Perhaps there is someone in your life right now who needs a word of encouragement. Don’t feel limited in how you can use your words. You could write stories that speak of the wonder of life. You could write poems to share with anyone who has meant something to you. You could write songs or make videos to express yourself or to share what you are learning right now. You could teach and instruct those around you with your words. The options are endless, you have been designed in a unique way. You see the world through eyes that have been wonderfully made.


We need your perspective; you are not a mistake. Never discount your thoughts and ideas. If you feel unsure or nervous about writing, I encourage you to just begin writing in a journal or notebook. Try expressing yourself in a private way and it will prepare you for more public expressions if that should be how you are led to share. We have all been given minds to create sentences and thoughts for a reason. As we walk through our years here on earth, we should aspire to be life givers and life makers in all that we say and do. There is an awesome acronym that you can take with you and apply to all your words as you express them in a multitude of ways.

The acronym is T.H.I.N.K. T – Is it True? Are the words that are about to cross your tongue or fingertips, truthful? If not, evaluate why you may want to share a lie. H – Is it Helpful? Will your words aid someone on their way through life or hinder them? I – Is it Inspiring? There are plenty of negative words coming out of other people’s mouths. Be the change! Be the difference! Commit to a life that inspires others! N – Is it Necessary? Some comments and opinions are better left in our heads. I struggle with this one. Snarky comments want to spring from my mouth before I can stop them. K – Is it Kind? Unkind words can sink deep and last a lifetime. Let’s not add to the criticism that some choose to spew from their mouths. Choose to build others up! May this handy acronym come to mind as you exercise your gift of words in this world, online and in person. Never forget how powerful your words are, they may be easy to say or write but the effect of them has the potential to last a lifetime!

Throughout human history, our greatest leaders and thinkers have used the power of words to transform our emotions, to enlist us in their causes, and to shape the course of destiny. Words can not only create emotions, they create actions. And from our actions flow the results of our lives.” TONY ROBBINS

Be mindful when it comes to your words. A string of some that don’t mean much to you may stick with someone for a lifetime.” RACHEL WOLCHIN

Words are containers for power, you choose what kind of power they carry.” JOYCE MEYER

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She Spark

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E SPARKLES

“Precious jewel, you glow, you shine,

reflecting all the good things in the world.

Just look at yourself.” MAYA ANGELOU

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 06

kles.

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sparkle! The world needs your twinkling. How many people do you think would be affected if you turned off your shining light? The truth is, you have no idea how many lives your sparkle will inspire and impact in your lifetime! Will you go past your comfort zone and step bravely into the unknown to sparkle more of who you are—a gift to this world? The choice is yours. The moments you do step out are moments to celebrate—there is no growth without risk!

DISCOVER / ACCEPT / EMBRACE / CELEBRATE YOU! There are so many various temperament and personality tests you can take to discover more of your design that are worth taking. Some are even free online! Explore and take some of those tests to discover more of who you are, who you are not, and your strengths and weaknesses. You will be continually changing, maturing, and blossoming forth throughout your life. Know that you have a unique and specific design that you will continually grow into more as you mature! It will be a process and an interesting journey as you discover the facets of your own sparkle and live it out!

We each have unique… • personalities and temperaments • past experiences • insights and knowledge • ways we think about things • gifts, talents, and abilities • strengths and weaknesses • callings and destinies • passions and creative expressions And so much more!

"Maybe our sparkle comes from somewhere deeper inside, somewhere so pure and authentic and real, it doesn't need gloss or polish or glitter to shine." MANDY HALE

"A generous heart, a spontaneous smile, and eyes that sparkle with delight can be part of any woman's signature look once she awakens to her authentic beauty." SARAH BAN BREATHNACH

"Every day is a great day to give love, spread joy, and sparkle!" SHERI FINK

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ACTIVITY Let’s have some fun! Take a look at these four common groupings of traits that generally separate personality types (of course we can have traits in more than one group, but we usually will relate strongest to one type). Note that the Myer Briggs personality test has broken it down further to 16 personality types and combinations! Which one do you most identify with?

• ANALYTICAL • ORGANIZED • PERFECTIONIST • ORDERLY AND FACTUAL • LOVES ROUTINE • PROMPT/MEETS DEADLINES • RESERVED • PERSEVERING • INQUISITIVE • DETAILED AND METICULOUS

• FEELS EMOTIONS • FRIENDLY AND RELATIONAL • TEAM-ORIENTED • EASY GOING AND NON-DEMANDING • GOOD LISTENER • CARES A LOT ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF THEM • VALUES HARMONY • LOYAL • TENDS TO WANT TO AVOID CONFLICT • SYMPATHETIC AND NURTURING

• TASK-ORIENTED • DOES WELL UNDER PRESSURE • NATURAL LEADER – TAKES CHARGE • COMPETITIVE • DECISIVE AND BOLD • COMMUNICATES TO THE POINT • TENDS TO DIRECTLY CONFRONT WHEN IN A CONFLICT • ENJOYS CHALLENGES • SELF-RELIANT

• ADVENTUROUS • NATURAL PROMOTER AND MOTIVATOR • ENERGETIC • ENJOYS BEING SPONTANEOUS • FREE-SPIRITED • TAKES RISKS • VERY VERBAL AND MIXES EASILY • NATURAL VISIONARY • OPTIMISTIC • LIKES VARIETY

WHAT ARE SOME THINGS THAT YOU ARE PASSIONATE ABOUT?

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How many people does it take to make a difference? One.

One song can spark a moment, One flower can wake the dream. One tree can start a forest, One bird can herald spring. One smile begins a friendship, One handclasp lifts a soul.

One candle wipes out darkness, One laugh will conquer gloom. One step must start each journey, One word must start a prayer. One hope will raise our spirits, One touch can show you care.

One star can guide a ship at sea, One word can frame a goal. One vote can change a nation, One sunbeam lights a room.

One voice can speak with wisdom, One heart can know what’s true. One life can make a difference, That difference starts with you. -UNKNOWN

ACTIVITY: Briefly list down 1-3 recollections of a specific moment or moments in time that impacted you for the better. ONE moment’s experience can be unforgettable and impactful.

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pssst!

9

secrets for shining “It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.” MARY DUNBAR

“Shine with all you have.” KATELYN S. IRONS

Are you ready for more blooming? You can tear this out or take a photo of this to remind yourself of these stepping stones that will point you in the right direction!

1.GROWING IS GOOD!

Be teachable. Be humble enough to grow from every experience. With our many imperfections, we are all in the process of maturing. What can you learn from your circumstances? Are you growing in compassion? Confidence? Reflect on this and be gentle and patient with yourself in the process. “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” MAYA ANGELOU

2. CARE FOR your emotional health

Practice self-care. Love and value yourself in healthy ways. Take time to do activities that fill you up, refresh you, and give you peace. Take steps to grow in emotional health. If you have experienced any trauma, or are struggling with ongoing depression or anxiety, get help for your healing!

3.care for your body Grow in taking care of your body to keep it healthy, strong, and energized. When you are drained and burnt out, it is difficult to sparkle. However, when you have a zest for life, you will naturally be an uplifting source of encouragement to others. Our emotional and physical health are interrelated.

4.FIND YOUR TRUE FRIENDS

Some friends build you up while others can drain your energy. Reflect on the advice your close friends are giving you. Are they safe, wise, and trustworthy? Do they want what’s best for you? Consider their maturity and character before giving them your ear on important matters. Good friends lift you up. Sometimes it can be a painful, lonely season trying to find true friends. If this is you, continue to persevere in seeking out good friends. At the same time, we can all work on becoming that true friend to others!

5.PASSION AND FOCUS

Seek to discover activities you enjoy and look for opportunities to dive in! You have unique interests, skills, gifts, and talents! Explore things that interest you. Do more of what you love. “Find something you’re passionate about and keep tremendously interested in it.” JULIA CHILD

6.STAY TRUE TO YOU

We all have those moments when we find ourselves comparing ourselves to someone, experiencing rejection, or feeling intimidated by someone due to their status, looks, or otherwise. The desire to please others to fit in and belong is real! Staying true to yourself can be easier said than done. Continue

to practice being your most authentic, genuine self and seek out friends who appreciate you for being you!

7.challenge yourself

Challenge yourself with a new goal or pursue something new in life. When you are expanding your capacity and are growing, this can give you a great sense of fulfillment and purpose, enabling you to glitter and shimmer in new ways. You are more capable than you think! Start with just one goal—one change you make daily can make all the difference!

8.KEEP YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR

Don’t forget to the keep the fun factor in your life. It is always good from time to time to do something fun that brings laughter and a sense of childlike joy. Sometimes as we are growing up, we can take life so seriously and forget how to be lighthearted and childlike. When was the last time you acted silly or goofy—or did a happy dance when something great happened! How has your sense of humor been lately? Being able to relax and have a good laugh can restore that twinkle in your eye!

9.be others focused

You can intentionally be the source of goodness and light in someone else’s life each day. Smile more. Give compliments, and positively affirm others—your words are powerful. Many people go for days, weeks, or months without receiving any words of affirmation that validate the facts that they matter and are seen and noticed. Your acts of service and kindness expressed to others shine out rays of sunshine to the world. As you give out goodness to others, you receive back encouragement and joy that will fuel your inner flame to shine brighter.

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She R

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B RAVE & B EAUTI FU L JOU RN EY: SH E RESTS

“When you rest, you catch your breath and it holds you up, like water wings…” ANNE LAMOTT

JOU RN EY 01 • CHAPTER 07

Rests.

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the rhythm of rest. Fast. Fast. And fast! Sometimes, life can so busy and fast paced!

If we keep going non-stop, we can end up being less productive in the long run!

Rest. Yeah...but when am I going to find time to do that? And how much is too much rest when things gotta get done?

MENTAL REST

How do we slow down in a sometimes fast-paced world with school, family obligations, time with friends and activities? The answer is not always easy. It is good to value time to restore and refresh. Taking time out to rest is often not something that many of us naturally make time to do.

PHYSICAL REST

Why is getting a good night’s sleep important? A good, nightly rest can benefit us by: • helping us to have sharp thinking and good memory • regulating our mood • giving us physical strength to perform better in physical activities • keeping our natural immunity to illness strong

Our brains need rest in order to gain fresh perspectives and to be able to come up with innovative ideas. When possible, take a 15 minute power nap (set your alarm) the next time you feel sluggish. A power nap can help to reset your brain. Take part in healthy activities that rest your brain from analytical thinking. Sometimes doing non-linear activities like walking your dog, washing dishes, listening to music, or looking at artwork can help! Say no to sensory overload! Give your senses a rest as well from smartphone notification sounds and device screens by turning off your devices during times of relaxation. Rest allows our body, mind, and spirit to renew, refresh, and be restored so we can approach our life once again with renewed energy, strength, and focus.

HERE ARE SOME ‘REST-FULL’ ACTIVITIES YOU CAN START DOING TODAY! • Plan a time of quiet that can include journaling or reading (take a break from looking at your phone, computer, or the television). • Carve out regular time to rest that is unplanned and unstructured—a time to rest your brain and body. • Plan a time for recreational rest! What do you like to do for fun? What activities do you enjoy

doing that does not require a lot of mental and emotional energy? • Plan times to be in nature. Be in places with natural surroundings (could be your favorite park or take a walk where you see nature around you). Such activity can refresh us physically, mentally, and emotionally. For example, you could take a walk, lie down and watch the clouds, watch the sunset, hike, or swim in the ocean or lake.

• How about sitting or lying down in silence daily for 3-5 minutes? Taking a moment to rest your mind can require effort but can give you a moment of rest for your brain and body. • Aim to enter into a restful place once a week to refresh to thrive and be healthy!

“Real rest feels like every cell is thanking you for taking care of you. It’s calm, not full of checklists and chores. It’s simple: not multitasking; not fixing broken things.” JENNIFER WILLIAMSON

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Don’t forget to

breathe. breathe.

breathe again.

BE FILLED WITH PEACE Did you know that deep breathing can actually calm you down? It can help clear your mind and give your brain a reset. We rarely use our full lung capacity when we breathe normally. Deep breathing gives our body a good dose of the much needed oxygen that our bodies need to thrive.

TRY THIS RIGHT NOW: 1.

Find a comfortable position.

2. Close your eyes. 3. Put one hand gently on your heart and the other on your belly. Take a slow deep breathe for about 3-4 seconds, inhaling through your nose. Your belly, not your chest, should expand. 4. Exhale slowly for 6-7 seconds through your mouth. 5. Repeat a few to several times depending how you feel. Try doing deep breathing at least once to a few times throughout the day and see how you feel, especially when you are stressed! TIP: You can practice deep breathing when you are waiting for someone or something or to simply to take a brief break from doing your homework or an activity!

TRY THIS ACTIVITY: 1.

Find a place where you can be alone and rest, preferably in a lying down position.

2. Play some peaceful instrumental music. 3. Take 3 deep breaths, slowly exhaling. You could imagine a peaceful place in your mind. 4. Try not to think about things that cause you to feel anxious, such as dwelling on a problem. Just rest and relax for several minutes. 5. After your time of resting, you can journal any thoughts that come to your mind. Enjoy the moment of resting your body, mind, soul, and spirit. This can be a great activity to do daily—whether it be for just 5 minutes or longer! Breathe and just be.

“Most of the things we need to be most fully alive never come in busyness. They grow in rest.” - Mark Buchanan “Your calm mind is the ultimate weapon against your challenges.” — Bryant McGill, Social Entrepreneur

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There is something infinitely healing in the repeated refrains of nature—the assurance that dawn comes after night, and spring after winter.” RACHEL CARSON

resting in nature

T

ake time to rest in nature. When you gaze at trees, the ocean waves, flowers, or various animals, you can make connections to a meaningful message. For example, when looking at a huge tree, you could be inspired to be like a shade tree to people, being a safe place—like how the birds make their nests in the branches of the trees. When looking at the vast ocean, you could get an inspirational thought that a problem you are wrestling with is actually a small thing in the context of the vastness of your whole life. We can gain positive perspectives when in the posture of rest!

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.” ALBERT EINSTEIN

We can soak in the beauty of nature through the sights, sounds, smells, and our sense of touch. Just being in natural surroundings can help reduce stress and anxiety and give us a sense of peace. For example, going on a hike, swimming in the ocean, or going on a boat ride can refresh our minds and reset our emotions. Take time to soak in nature moments as a regular habit! Take time to smell the roses, so to speak! “The earth has music for those who listen.” WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE “In all things of nature there is something of the marvelous.” ARISTOTLE

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“A sunrise or sunset can be ablaze with brilliance and arouse all the passion, all the yearning, in the soul of the beholder.” Mary Balogh, Best Selling Author

Are you a mountain person or an ocean person? Where is your favorite place to be outdoors? As you envision this place, describe the view, the sounds, the smells in this place that you love:

Why does this particular place bring you peace?

ACTIVITY Take a walk with your smartphone or camera. It could be around your neighborhood, at a park or even at your school. Take a photo of something in nature that catches your attention. It could be a tree, a rock, a flower, a puddle of water, or an ant! When you have time, spend some quiet time looking at the photo. Pay attention to thoughts and impressions that come to you. Write your thoughts below: I took a photo of a What does the photo speak to your heart?­­­­

Make it a practice that when you are in nature and something is highlighted to you or grabs your attention, take a pause. What is it that your eyes are feasting on or what are your ears are hearing? Soak it all in and enjoy! “In nature, nothing is perfect and everything is perfect. Trees can be contorted, bent in weird ways, and they're still beautiful.” ALICE WALKER

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M IND F UL LET T ERING Trace the lettering - it does not have to be perfect! Enjoy the process of creative lettering

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S PA C E TO P RAC T IC E, D RAW, OR JOURNAL :


she is Brave & Beautiful you!

She Expresses. She Sparkles. She Rests.

CHOOSE ONE OR MORE OF THE FOLLOWING ACTIONS STEPS: 1.

Be a flavor. You are unique! Discovering your likes and dislikes can develop your voice in this world.

down its attributes as a reminder of ways you want

Pick two questions from below—one from the DISLIKES list and one from LIKES list. Journal your answers. Have a conversation with someone you know and ask them the same two questions you chose. Share your answers with one another and enjoy expressing yourselves!

Diamond: Purity/Commitment/Faithfulness/Love

to sparkle. Ruby: Nobility/Passion/Purity

Emerald: Balance/Harmony/Growth/Abundance Amethyst: Peace/Calm/Wisdom/Hope Sapphire: Virtue/Wisdom/Royalty

Aqua Marine: Transformation/Loyalty/Truth

Dislikes: 3.

What frustrates you often?

What is one thing you would change about your world?

What is one negative attribute that is upsetting to you and why? (like dishonesty, greed etc.)

Create your own rhythm of rest. Try these ideas and see what works for you: • Take a regular powernap of 15 minutes in the afternoon (set your alarm) • Take a 10-15 minute walk outside each day

Likes:

• Take a relaxing bath

What topic do you love to talk about and why?

What would you like to learn more about and why?

• Turn off your phone for a designated period of time daily

What do you love to do for fun and why?

2. When we think of sparkling, visions of glittery jewels can easily come to mind.

Gems have historical and cultural meanings. Pick a gem below that represents attributes you aspire to have. Take a screenshot photo of that gem and write

• Read a good book you enjoy 4.

Put yourself in a posture to rest. • Find a quiet place free from distractions and get into a comfortable position. • Take 3 deep breaths and focus your mind on a peaceful scene. • Try not to think of anything and rest your entire being for 3-5 minutes.

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