RTN Newspaper – Costa del Sol 30 March - 5 April 2018 Issue 048

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House fire puts four in hospital

Issue 048

30th March - 5th April

Palomas Park does not write off women

by Tom Woods BENALMADENA Council has dedicated the walkways in Las Palomas Park with the names of 10 of Spain’s most celebrated 20th century female writers.

Ten hand-painted plaques designed to look like open books have been installed on the footpaths, each one inscribed with the name of a famous literary figure.

Included in the list are Maria Zambrano, Concha Mendez, Angeles Santos, Elizabeth Mulder and Teresa Leon Goyri.

The women are all part of the artistic movement known as the ‘Generation of 27’ (it formed in 1927), chosen for their notable contribution to Spanish culture and their commitment to equality for women.

As part of the council’s commitment to promoting equality, the project is designed to promote women and their rights.

Mayor of Benalmadena, Vic-

WRITER WALKWAY: The initiative is a tribute to great female authors.

INSIDE THIS WEEK ...

MAN DIES AFTER SPRING FESTIVAL FIGHT

Credit: Ayuntamiento de Benalmadena

A FIRE broke out in the kitchen of a house in Fuengirola, affecting seven people, two of them children.

Residents alerted the emergency services to smoke and flames emerging from a floor of Calle Perez Galdos at 5am on Monday morning.

Firefighters, Local and National Police, and emergency health services went to the scene and all seven inhabitants were treated for smoke inhalation. Four of them had to be transferred to the primary care centre of Las Lagunas, and two of these were aged only 11 and 14.

Given that the fire only damaged the entrance to the kitchen and did not extend to the rest of the house, it was not necessary to evacuate the property.

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P3 EASTER TIDINGS

P11 AN ORIGINAL FISH RECIPE tor Navas, said: “We must acknowledge the great efforts and achievements harvested by these illustrious pioneers in the struggle for equality.

“We will continue to do as much as possible in order to highlight the groundbreaking achievements they secured.”

P31

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30th March - 5th April Credit: Ayuntamiento de Estepona

MURAL MANIA: The painting will go on public display.

Magnificent mural added to town’s treasures A 19TH CENTURY wall painting has been discovered in a building located in the central Plaza de las Flores, in Estepona.

T he finding was made during the renovation work of a private property, and it has also been revealed that the council was based in the building during the liberal triennium (18201823).

The wall painting, which is now being restored by the council’s conser-

vation department, features several scrolls and ornaments in honour of the Constitution of Cadiz in 1812.

A courtyard bedecked with arches has also been discovered in the building, while similar paintings can be found in Plaza Manuel Alcantara square and Calle Mondejar.

Councillor for Historic Heritage, Jose Maria Guerrero, explained that such a recovery of a mural painting in a historic house is the first action of its kind to be

carried out by the local authority.

The painting will be added to the Route of Artistic Murals that contains over 500 works of varying styles on the facades of buildings across the town.

Refurbishment and beautification works of the town centre with the project ‘Estepona, Garden of the Costa del Sol,’ in addition to tourism and commercial developments, are shedding light on the history of the town and raising its profile.

Full speed ahead for bus service BUSES from Mijas are to be run by the same company in a move by the council to manage all the vehicles of its transport department.

The bus service is to be tendered for the first time, which is believed to bring savings for the council’s coffers.

“We encourage all interested companies to participate,” said Jose Carlos Martin, councillor for Transport Contracts.

“The contract will last for two years with the possibility of an extension and all the information is available on our website.”

A range of events and excursions offered to residents will be covered in the shake-up, including senior tours, sports, and youth trips.

In a repeat of the novel approach taken last year, this summer will see a system of shuttle buses put into operation to cover the lack of parking in Mijas.

30th March - 5th April

Man dies after Spring festival fight THE Guardia Civil is investigating the death of a 27-yearold man after a fig ht that broke out during the Spring festival in Manilva.

A Spanish local was the victim, receiving two punches before collapsing and hitting his head on the ground.

The aggressor has been arrested after turning himself in to the police, although they had already identified him and were closing in.

Hundreds of people had gathered on Saturday night in the Plaza Martin Car pena to celebrate the festival.

Despite attempts by paramedics to revive the man, he died at the scene and his body has been transferred to the Institute of L egal Medicine in Malaga where there will be an autopsy.

The Guardia Civil is heading

Trust in trees falls at school Credit: Ayuntamiento de Manilva

by Tom Woods

AGAINST VIOLENCE: 1,500 residents protested in Manilva.

the investigation into the attack , and Manilva Council

called for three days of mourning, including a public gather-

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ing to denounce violence in all forms.

PARENTS of students at the CEIP primary school in Palma de Mallorca, Torremolinos, have gathered at a protest against the dangerous collapsing of trees in the area.

After another incident on Saturday, they are demanding that reinforcement work to both the school facilities and the nearby pine forest be carried out without further delay.

A tree fell on the entrance to the school, where hundreds of children pass daily, and the Junta de Andalucia and the children’s ombudsman have been notified of the situation.

Having received a number of complaints about the danger posed by the pine forest, the council commissioned an external company to assess the trees.

A few weeks later works began to strip back the forest, but this in turn led to an outcry from environmentalist group Torrenatura, who argued that the real problem was the years of neglect that the forest had suffered.

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30th March - 5th April

€30,000 payout for bullied secretary

AN agreement has been signed by Marbella Council and the environmental association Produnas on the future maintenance and protection of the area’s sand dunes.

Mayor Angeles Muñoz has announced that new protocols have been established that require consensus on all coastal actions taken which affect the dune system.

“Produnas has long done a great deal to preser ve and protect the dunes and our obligation as the administration is to cooperate with them,” said Mayor Muñoz.

“We want to have the support of Produnas and to ensure that their advice is binding when carrying out any activity which might affect the dune environment which is unique to our province.”

The council has also highlighted the agreement that has been confirmed between the owners of the future W Marbella hotel in Las Chapas, and Produnas to protect the dune of Real de Zaragoza.

Produnas president, Fernando Piquer, thanked the council for its support and said:

Credit: Ayuntamiento de Marbella

TORREMOLINOS Council has been ordered by a top court to pay out almost €30,000 to a former official for ‘psychological abuse.’

The judge ruled that during the previous administration, Maria Auxiliadora Gomez was ‘humiliated’ by the Popular Party, when she was municipal secretary at the council.

Ms Gomez oversaw the legality of the council’s actions as part of her role, and was not afraid to criticise the then mayor, Pedro Fernandez Monte, if she was unhappy with certain policies.

One of these involved the awarding of beach lifeguard contracts, and another was the sale of 95 per cent of the shares in the council’s water company.

Although the PSOE are now in charge, it will still be obliged to pay the sum.

Environmentalists call the tune on dunes

PRO DUNES: All parties agree that the sand dunes must be protected. “ We have been de fending the dunes of Marbella for more than

1 4 ye a r s b e c a u s e i t i s a n at u ra l heritage that cannot be lost, and

we feel much more reassured than in the past.”

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30th March - 5th April

Credit: Guardia Civil

THE Guardia Civil has arrested two people for the kidnapping of a man in the ‘El Juncal’ district of Mijas.

A member of the public went to the Mijas police station because he had seen a video on social media which showed the harassment and physical abuse of the young victim.

On viewing the footage, officers quickly identified one of the attackers and immediately went to his home.

The man tried to escape through a window car r ying a large knife, but when this failed he barricaded himself inside the room where the victim was still being held.

A f te r n e g o t i at i n g w i t h t h e a s sailant, officers persuaded him to release the captive, who had serious injuries to his head and body and was transferred to the Regional Hospital of Marbella.

It took a further hour of negotiations for the attacker to be convinced to surrender, whereupon he was arrested.

Investigators then retrieved a number of videos from the detainee’s mobile phone, which showed the victim being verbally and physically abused,

HORROR WEAPON: The victim suffered multiple injuries in the ordeal. and revealing that a second man was involved in the attack.

T his man has also been ar rested and the two defendants, a Spaniard and a Moroccan, have long criminal records for other crimes.

The charges they have been given

include kidnapping, attempted murder, and grievous bodily harm.

T h e k i d n a p p i n g i s b e l i e ve d to have lasted for 15 hours and police have seized four large knives and a Japanese katana (sword) from the house.

Credit: Ayuntamiento de Mijas

Police rescue man after kidnap hell

FANTASTIC FIVE: The girls were rightly honoured by the mayor for their success.

Magical mijenas are dancing stars MAYOR of Mijas, Juan Carlos Maldonado, and Sports Councillor Nuria Rodriguez, have celebrated the mijenas who became national dance champions last month.

The five girls were invited to the mayor’s office to be honoured for their fantastic achievement and Mr Maldonado said: “We are proud that in our town there are people, especially young people, who strive to achieve their dreams every day.

“These girls are a clear example of sacrifice and dedication, and we at the council want to recognise their efforts as they have put the name of Mijas at the top of national dance.”

More than 1,400 dancers from across Spain competed in the championship that was held in Talavera de la Reina, and the Mijas girls had trained at the ‘Dance with Freedom’ school.

Councillor Rodriguez said: “We congratulate the dance coach and the parents for this milestone, these awards are the fruit of many hours of work and sacrifice not only for the girls, but their families.”

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30th March - 5th April Credit: Ayuntamiento de Estepona

SWEET STREETS: Visitors will notice a fragrance in the air.

Town will blossom with a spring cleaning A UNIQUE street cleaning approach for Holy Week has been revealed by Estepona Council, which will feature aromas of orange blossom in the street water.

Councillor for Sociocultural services, Blas Ruzafa, has emphasised the importance of the town looking its best for the influx of visitors.

Intensive cleaning has already begun and 25 workers will be spreading the orange blossom across town, including the historic centre.

The ‘aromatic and deodorising’ blossom will “reinforce the smell of the natural flowering of the orange trees in this area,” says Mr Ruzafa.

A non-stick product will also be sprayed on the streets to ensure that hot wax from the parades does not fix itself to them.

The council has encouraged the public to contribute to maintaining the town’s cleanliness, refraining from littering and respecting rubbish bin collection timetables.

Credit: Guardia Civil

MARIHUANA MOUNTAIN: The international operation seized a huge drugs stash.

Europol swoops THE Guardia Civil, in tandem with the ZFA of Bremen, have dismantled a criminal ring responsible for the international trafficking of marihuana from the Costa del Sol across Europe.

Operation ‘Carambolas’ has been coordinated by Europol and 18 people have been arrested, while another nine are being investigated.

Charges include crimes against public health, belonging to a criminal

organisation, violating road safety, illegal possession of weapons, an attack against police, and money laundering.

One ton of marihuana has been seized, along with €212,000 in cash, a firearm, ammunition and eight vehicles.

However, two officers from the Guardia Civil were seriously wounded in one of the arrests and are still recovering in a hospital in Granada.

30th March - 5th April

9

Seprona confirm no crematorium in San Pedro Credit: Department of Cemeteries Marbella

T HE Nature Protection Ser vice (Seprona) of the Guardi a C ivil has sent a report to the mayor's o f f i c e o f S a n Pe d r o A l c a n t a r a concerning a complaint about an alleged crematorium.

T he complaint was lodged by the spokeswoman of IU, Victoria Morales, in which she refer red to emissions of gases and smoke.

T h e re s u l t o f t h e i n s p e c t i o n carried out by the Marbella branch of Seprona made it clear that the recently built mortuary consists of two f loors in which there is no crematorium and in

OBJECTION OVERTURNED: The new mortuary has no crematorium.

addition, there are no chimneys on the roof of the building.

T h e re p o r t co n c l u d e s t h e re fore, that there is no evidence that the funeral home is emitting fumes into the atmosphere from a crematorium and therefore the complaint is not upheld.

According to the deputy mayo r o f S a n Pe d r o A l c a n t a r a , R a f a e l P i ù a , h a d t h e I U re p re sentative checked with the mayor ’s office the y would have received the same information immediately and without needing to involve the police.

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30th March - 5th April

Groundbreaking deal to unite town Credit: Ayuntamiento de Mijas

by Tom Woods A H I S T OR IC d e a l h a s been reached in Mijas between the political parties Ciudadanos and PSOE, and the Centre for Spani s h S p e a k i n g Pe o p l e s (CSSP).

T he agreement, which has now been signed, will lead to the creation of the first public department of the town that is dedicated to the needs of the LGTBI community.

Cross-party talks on the i s s u e h ave l e d to a 2 8 point document outlining the initiative, which has been labelled ‘for stability.’

The measure will focus on the issues of mobility, to u r i s m a n d d i ve r s i t y

among others, and the department will be given resources to promote them.

A mobility plan will introduce digital informa-

t i o n b o a rd s fo r a l l b u s stops in the town, detaili n g a l l e x p e c te d a r r i va l t i m e s a s w e l l a s p r i ce s , routes and weather.

In addition, the plan paves the way for the construction of cycle lanes in all suitable areas of Mijas.

There will also be a new

MODERN MIJAS: The agreement represents a progressive shift for Mijas.

Traffic Control Centre for the Local Police station in recognition of the considerable growth of L as L agunas.

Other projects include illuminated pedestr ian crossings, shelters at each bus stop, increasing the frequency of transport services between Fuengirola and Mijas, and the creation of a new bus station at the Miramar Shopping Centre.

The measure that has attracted the most attention for its unprecedented nature is the creation of an Office for Diversity.

It will be awarded ‘suffcient’ funding in order to carry out activities aimed at the LGTBI community, of which the CSSP will be ‘collaborator and participant ,’ as per the agreement.

Funding has not yet been finalised but a sum of around €500,000 is believed to have been earmarked for this.

The tourism industry in the area has also been reviewed, and a special commission has been created to reinstate the Mijas CIO (The Centre for the Integral Training of Leisure Industries), and its hotel.

30th March - 5th April

11 Photo Credit: BigKnell Shutterstock

Easter tidings

By Peter Purvey EASTER is upon us once again and for many Christians throughout the world it is the most significant date in the ecclesiastical calendar.

However, Easter is a movable feast and Easter Sunday, the traditional day of the Resurrection, may be on any Sunday between March 21 and April 25, when using the current Gregorian calendar, but for many the method of calculating the exact day each year remains a mystery.

A t a co u n c i l h e l d i n A D 3 2 5 at N i c a e a ( a b o u t 3 0 miles south west of Izmit in present day northern Turkey) it was decided that Easter Sunday should be the first Sunday following the first full moon after the Vernal (Spring) Equinox, which is March 21.

Should March 21 itself fall on a Sunday then that would be Easter Day. A look at the March calendar for this year will show that the first full moon after the 21st will be on Saturday, thus the first Sunday after that is the next day which is Easter Sunday.

This is the accepted way of calculation by the easter n C hr istian churches, ie Catholic , Ang lican and Protestant churches, but many Or thodox easter n churches still use a different method using the old Julian and Jewish calendars, although the dates coincid-

SPAIN: Has a spectacular tradition of celebrating Easter.

ed in 2014 and 2017.

A problem for Rome arose in Britain in the seventh centur y as the Celtic churches’ teachings emanated from the establishments of Iona and Lindesfarn who were teaching different liturgical traditions.

While some were celebrating Easter, others were still fasting during Lent! The matter came to a head at the Synod of Whitby held in 664, the result being the eventual Romanisation of the church in England and the way we calculate the date of Easter being made permanent.

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30th March - 5th April

Time for a water price cap Photo credit: Steven Depolo Flickr

IN response to a number of complaints from passengers to the authorities, airports in Spain will have to cap the amount they charge for bottled water.

The maximum permitted is now €1.60. In addition, they will be installing drinking fountains in the airport complex.

Travellers make the point that they’re not allowed to take any water on to their place due to restriction on the amount of liquid permitted through security, currently a maximum of 100 millilitres.

However, once they get to the other side of the barriers, vending machines sell the bottled water at ver y high prices.

Depending on the airport, the price range of a 330ml bottle of still water can be as much as €3, which similar rates being charged on the aircraft.

TAP OR CAP: Authorities react to passenger price complaints

For some time, people have waited for the law to change on the amount of liquid allowed on board but there is nothing on the horizon.

To get over the restrictions, some travellers have been known to take empty water bottles through the security and then fill them from the taps in the toilets; although the quality

can’t always be trusted.

AENA, the airport managers, have promised that in future the cost of a bottle of water will be no hig her than €1.60...but they haven’t said what size that bottle will be.

In addition to the cap, public – and free – drinking fountains are expected to be installed in all airports across Spain.

NATIONAL

30th March - 5th April

Photo credit: BBCLDC Wikimedia

ON GUARD: Bilbao’s Guggenheim Museum and the puppy of flowers.

Bilbao welcomes the Maltese SUMMER officially landed at Malta International airport with the touchdown of the first aircraft from Bilbao.

The beginning of this new connection at the weekend marked the launch of the airport’s summer schedule featuring over 100 destinations and 16 new routes for the season.

Flights to and from Bilbao operated by Spanish airline Volotea, will be taking off from Malta International airport every Saturday, with the airline increasing the frequency to a biweekly service in May. The addition of Bilbao to the schedule has brought the airport’s Spanish routes up to seven, and will enable passengers to discover the northern part of the Iberian Peninsula.

Irrespective of where people come from, Bilbao is an excellent destination for trav-

ellers seeking adventure in the great outdoors.

From the peak of Mount Artxandra, reachable by a funicular railway that goes to the very top; visitors can enjoy stunning views of the surrounding mountains and the river that snakes through the city.

Bilbao also boasts a number of great architectural works, with the spectacular and shining Guggenheim museum guarded by the famous ‘puppy’ made from flowers and plants and a nine-metre tall spider.

Not forgetting, of course, that Spanish tourists will also get their opportunity to discover Malta, the island nation, famous for its year-round warm climate, featuring a number of architectural and historical monuments that include three UNESCO World Heritage Sites.

Island falls into private hands ONE of the small Balearic Islands has been sold to a family in Luxembourg.

The chunk of land located close to the island of Formentera has been sold as a private sale for €18 million after local authorities, who were hoping to buy the island themselves, failed to find anyone else to make the purchase.

The new owners of S’Espalmador must now, as part of the terms of the deal, comply with both Spanish and regional laws that prohibit any kind of

building on the nature reserve.

It appears that the island has been on the market for a number of months, but the high price of the land and no financial backing from the Spanish government stopped the Balearic regional authorities from buying it.

S’Espalmador has been in private hands since it was bought by a British citizen back in 1932 for just €255 (£220).

Bernard Cinnamond paid (at the time) 42,500 pesetas, and up until it

was recently sold it was in the hands of Norman and Rosy Cinnamond who had inherited it from their grandfather.

The small island three kilometres long and only 800 metres wide - is part of the Ses Salines Natural Park and contains 137 hectares of land.

Apart from the lack of any construction being permitted on the land, all trips there by swimmers and divers have been stopped, as well as the popular tourist excursions to the mud baths.

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30th March - 5th April

HAVE YOUR SAY

Furhat Subla Really shocking. What is retirement age for a teacher in academy!

Credit: Mijas Council

“Teacher arrested over child abuse claims in Torrevieja”

€5,000 grants to get the public active MIJAS Council has announced that there will be an increase in funding this year for initiatives dedicated to community activities.

Councillor for Citizen Participation, Tamara Vera (PSOE), revealed at a meeting with public associations that they will be eligible for grants worth up to €5,000.

“This increase is motivated by the need for our associations to plan all the activities they run, and as a boost to these groups that contribute so much to the life of our town,” said Ms Vera.

Associations wishing to apply for the grants must be recognised in the register of associations, as well as prove that their activities are open to all residents.

The administrative process in which the funding is awarded has also been improved, meaning that groups will receive it quicker and easier.

Jenny Hewkin What has retirement age got to do with anything? Some people wish to continue working it has nothing to do with what this guy did.

FUNDING FUN: The increased grants will promote community activities.

• Costa Blanca woman arrested after falsely reporting her kidnap • Uproar at loss of local ambulance in Costa Blanca town • Lisa Brown’s family launch fresh appeal in Spain with £100,000 reward •Man arrested after groping three women in 15 minutes • Teacher arrested over child abuse claims in Torrevieja

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THE deployment of fibre broadband in San Roque is progressing well.

Councillor for New Technologies, David Ramos, is overseeing the installation by the Avatel Telecom company, which has been rolling out the service in the area since late January.

“In addition to the centre, work is underway to enable these improvements to reach the entire municipality,” said Mr Ramos.

It is expected that this year 5,000 homes in San Roque will be connected to high-speed broadband.

As part of the service, residents will be able to access almost 200 high-definition television channels.

Mr Ramos is also assessing the possibility of installing several WiFi points in the area.

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A T R A FFIC acc ident on the AP-7 in Estepona has led to the death of a 36y e a r- m a n , w h i l e a 3 2 year-old woman has been injured.

The man lost control of the car and crashed off of the road, hitting several trees and overturning.

The fire brigade, traffic officers and other emergency services went to t h e s c e n e a n d w h i l e t h e m a n w a s a l re a d y d e a d , t h e wo m a n w a s transferred to the Costa del Sol Hospital.

Town to be high in fibre

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30th March - 5th April

Outcry over Franco LEFT-WING activists are calling for the name of Villafranco del Guadalhorce, a hamlet in Alhaurin el Grande, to be changed.

They claim that it breaks laws that ban symbols of General Franco’s dictatorship.

It is the last place name in Andalucia to have a reference to the old ruler, and the protesters have started a campaign to highlight the issue to locals.

Council sets the bar high Credit: Ayuntamiento de Fuengirola

PLAYA ON: Young people will welcome the games areas.

THE beaches of Fuengirola have bene fite d from a €30,000 windfall from the co uncil, which has been used for renovation and for the installation of four new games areas.

Councillor for Beaches, Jose Sanchez , announced that there are now six sports areas along the seven kilometres of coastline, including a parkour section

(urban climbing) on Castillo beach.

“Fuengirola Council has made a great effort to make its beaches ready for the beginning of the season, and they are equipped in every way,” said Mr Sanchez. “ We now have four new games areas and as they are mostly used by young people, we want them to have the best possible facilities.”

A lost art alive again CULTURE Councillor of Mijas, Hipolito Zapico, has presented the 22nd Mijas Letters of Love literary contest, saying: “One of the goals we have is to increase the par ticipation of people from Mijas, and we are going to get in touch with schools to enco u ra g e t h e p a r t i c i pation of the students. “ This contest has a l o n g h i s t o r y, e v i denced by the fact that we have made a compilation of the winning letters from 1996 to 2017, which includes works full of feeling and which will be available in libraries and schools across the town.”

Those interested must be residents in Spain, be over 16 years of age, and the l e t te r m u s t b e w r i t ten in Spanish.

L ast year, people from 198 different countr ies took par t , and this year there will be three prizes worth €100 each.

NATIONAL

‘Quiet please!’ at the fiestas Photo credit: Pixabay

AS local authorities have just finished cleaning up f ro m t h i s y e a r ’s M a rc h Fallas fiestas, proposals a re a l re a d y b e i n g m a d e for nex t ye ar... to make them quieter.

A c o u n c i l l o r f ro m Va lencia is attempting to get Local Police to enforce a ‘silent time’ during the busy annual fiestas when the throwing of fireworks is banned.

This is as a result of the number of calls complaining about the noise from bangers being continually thrown around increasing f ro m 3 1 7 t o 4 9 2 i n o n e year.

Local Police do have the authorisation to take action against anyone who ‘misuses ’ fireworks and bangers, but local people as well as Councillor Anais Meng uzz ato - believe the laws need to be more clearly defined for the future.

At the ver y least, the co u n c i l l o r i s a s k i n g fo r any form of pyrotechnics to be banned between the times the street par ties finish until they kick-off again in the early morning with the traditional

30th March - 5th April

SSSHHH: Councillor leads campaign for ‘silent time’ during March fiestas. (File image)

‘awakening’ air bombs.

Ho w e ve r, t h i s wo u l d most likely only mean a respite of between four to s i x h o u r s . M a ny s t re e t parties in the private marquees often carry on until 4am... and then the following day’s activities often start at 7am or 8am.

Meng uzz ato said that the problem isn’t just the occasional firecracker bei n g t h ro w n d o w n . . . i n some parts of the city it’s a 2 4 - h o u r, ro u n d - t h e clock cacophony of noise.

It’s hoped that the proposed ‘silent time’ may also prove popular across

t h e re s t o f t h e Va l e n c i a Province , where almost ever y town and village celebrates the annual Fallas... and constantly have similar issues with residents tr ying to get to sleep, especially those that find themselves having to get up for work.

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Arrival of spring dreaded... by some SUFFERERS of hay fever in certain parts of Spain aren’t looking forward to this spring season.

Following a number of forecasts contained in a report from the Spanish Allergy and Immunology Clinic (SEAIC)’s Aerobiology Comm i t t e e , t h o s e i n t h e p r o v i n c e s o f To l e d o , Sevilla, Vitoria and Extremadura will be less than happy at the increased levels of pollen.

They are expected to be similar levels to those experienced during the same period in 2017, but they were lower than expected thanks to above average temperatures in April and May. The SEAIC says that the southern part of Castilla-La Mancha will experience moderate to high counts of pollen during the next three months. They will be particularly high i n C i u d a d R e a l , To l e d o , a n d i n t h e c i t y o f Madrid.

In the Mediterranean area, the province of Barcelona will see the highest pollen levels, although these will still be lower than in the south-western and south-central mainland.

Severe hay fever sufferers who are planning a holiday to Spain, or indeed those already resident here who tour around the country in their own cars or courtesy of the growing number of organised excursions, are advised to check in advance the pollen levels in their intended destinations.

Outside of Barcelona, the coast on the mainland traditionally has low or very low levels of pollen, as do the Canary Islands.

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30th March - 5th April

Information wars

by Michael Walsh

keyboardcosmetics@gmail.com MICHAEL, your friends have loved your posts 28,000 times!

We’re glad that you're getting support from your friends, and hope that this has made the world feel a little bit closer.

Actually, this irritating Facebook message, which appears often, reminded me once again of just how stupid, insipid and out of touch this utility has become.

Imagine, you decide to call your son, but before you connect a California-based recorded piece of programming tells you the forecast for Torrevieja is rain; ‘be prepared, Michael’.

That does not reassure me that I am an individual in an inclusive world. It reminds me that I am Citizen Smith under 24hour observation by George Orwell’s supreme Big Brother aka Mark Zuckerberg.

If I think I might be overreacting I get a kick in the pants reminder a few days later. Sitting

NOT POPULAR: A younger and perhaps more idealistic Mark Zuckerberg. at my laptop I have it in mind to tell other users breaking news.

However, the last time I posted a comment it offended one of Facebook’s 20,000 moderators (censors). Deemed to have breached Facebook standards 30 days will pass before I can use Facebook again.

I cannot think of a user who has-

n’t had service denied because of some innocuous meme or comment. A Danish travel service was blocked for posting an image of the bare-breasted mermaid statue in Copenhagen harbour.

Advice from the glib is to stop using Facebook. They overlook the fact that social media has evolved into an essential com-

munications and business tool to rival that of any other utility.

Facebook, and the internet in general, are now a more important source of information than conventional media. This is why the human face (sic) of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, is now in the crosshairs of corporate owned media.

Mainstream doesn’t like the new boy on the block. The less controlled internet reduces mainstream’s once absolute control of the political narrative.

NATO West’s anti-Russian trade war failed abysmally. Sanctions proved to be a massive own goal. The EU lost markets whilst creating a more self-sufficient, more successful Russian economy. The information war isn’t going too well either. Every attempt to vilify Vladimir Putin has failed. The usual strategy of first creating a war psychosis has come to nothing.

NATO is still provoking Russia whilst their Chinese ally is calling the US to account. The cornered rat in Washington DC now intends to fight its way out. To do this they must regain omnipotent control over people’s minds as they did before their earlier preplanned conflicts (and outcome).

This is why Zuckerberg is the new hate figure. He will likely lose the information war because his arrogant insolence and his continued belief that Facebook customers are ‘dumb f******’ has earned Zuckerberg no allies at all.

Mike Walsh’s opinions are his own and do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers advertisers or sponsors.

Advertising Feature

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FRIDAY 10:00am Painting the Holy Land 11:00am Homes Under the Hammer 12:00pm The Sheriffs are Coming 12:45pm Claimed and Shamed 1:15pm Bargain Hunt 2:00pm BBC News at One 2:15pm BBC London News 2:25pm 102 Dalmatians 4:00pm Escape to the Country 5:00pm Money for Nothing 5:45pm Flog It! 6:45pm Pointless 7:30pm BBC News 7:50pm BBC London News 8:00pm The One Show 8:40pm The Silent Child 9:00pm EastEnders 9:30pm Room 101 10:00pm MasterChef 10:30pm Mrs. Brown's Boys

7:00am Money for Nothing 7:45am Escape to the Country 8:30am Nature's Weirdest Events 9:30am Tinker Bell and the Secret of the Wings 10:40am Muppets Most Wanted 12:15pm Six Puppies and Us 1:15pm Growing Up Wild 2:15pm Coast 2:50pm Canterbury Cathedral 3:50pm Talking Pictures 4:35pm The Robe 6:45pm Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 7:30pm Eggheads 8:00pm The Repair Shop 8:30pm Mastermind 9:30pm Gardeners' World 10:00pm Pilgrimage: The Road to Santiago 11:00pm Episodes

9:20am Wishfart 9:35am Wishfart 9:50am Scrambled! Sketch Show 10:20am Mission Employable 10:25am K-9 12:15pm King Ralph 2:15pm Countrywise 2:40pm ITV Lunchtime News 2:50pm ITV News London 3:00pm Judge Rinder 4:00pm Dickinson's Real Deal 5:00pm Tipping Point 6:00pm The Chase 7:00pm Paul O'grady: For the Love of Dogs 7:30pm ITV News London 7:45pm ITV Evening News 8:00pm Emmerdale 8:30pm Coronation Street 9:00pm Love Your Garden 9:30pm Coronation Street 10:00pm Furious 7 12:30am ITV News at Ten and Weather

10:00am 10:30am 11:00am 11:30am 12:00pm 12:30pm 1:00pm 1:30pm 2:00pm 2:30pm 3:00pm 3:30pm 4:00pm 4:30pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 6:00pm 6:30pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 8:00pm 8:30pm

New Girl New Girl 2 Broke Girls 2 Broke Girls Brooklyn Nine-Nine Brooklyn Nine-Nine The Goldbergs The Goldbergs The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory Hollyoaks Extreme Cake Makers 9:00pm Fantastic Four 11:00pm Five Star Hotel 12:05am The Big Bang Theory

9:20am Digby Dragon 9:35am Rusty Rivets 9:55am Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:05am Mofy 10:15am The Wright Stuff 12:10pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

1:05pm 5 News Lunchtime 1:10pm Home and Away 1:40pm Neighbours 2:10pm Shenandoah 4:15pm The Searchers 6:30pm Neighbours 7:00pm Home and Away 7:25pm 5 News Tonight 7:35pm Kensington Palace: Fit for a Princess 9:00pm Britain's Great Cathedrals with Tony Robinson 10:00pm Jane Mcdonald and Friends 11:00pm Will and Grace 11:30pm Football on 5 12:30am Football on 5

7:00am

Gadget Gang in Outer Space 8:40am Chokeslam 10:30am Despicable Me 3 12:05pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 2:25pm Going in Style 4:05pm Gadget Gang in Outer Space 5:40pm Whisky Galore!

Remake of the classic wartime comedy about Scottish islanders trying to get their hands on the shipload of booze that washes up on their shores.

7:25pm Despicable Me 3 9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 11:20pm Going in Style 1:00am The Beguiled 2:45am Chokeslam 4:45am An

8:30am

9:30am 10:05am 10:25am 10:30am

8:00am Couples Come Dine with Me 9:00am Made in Chelsea 10:00am Don't Tell the Bride 11:00am The Goldbergs 1:30pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 2:00pm Young Sheldon 2:30pm The Big Bang Theory 3:00pm The Big Bang Theory 5:00pm The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up to Cancer 6:15pm Extreme Cake Makers 6:45pm Extreme Cake Makers 7:00pm The Big Bang Theory 7:30pm The Big Bang Theory 8:00pm The Big Bang Theory 8:30pm The Big Bang Theory 9:00pm The Big Bang Theory 9:30pm The Big Bang Theory 10:00pm The Watch 12:00am Gogglebox 1:00am Naked Attraction

11:30am Dogs Make You Laugh Out Loud 12:00pm Police Interceptors 1:00pm Police Interceptors 2:00pm Police Interceptors 3:00pm Traffic Cops 4:00pm Traffic Cops 5:00pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

6:00pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

7:00pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

8:00pm Cruising with Jane McDonald 9:00pm Inside Windsor Castle 9:55pm 5 News 10:00pm Secrets of Henry Viii's Palace 11:00pm Conspiracy: The Nazi King 12:00am Secrets of the Nazi Occult 1:00am Super Casino

7:00am Ready Player One: Special 7:30am Top Ten Show, the 2018 7:45am Cars 3 9:30am Despicable Me 3 11:15am Spider-Man: Homecoming 1:35pm Lou 1:50pm Cars 3 3:35pm Going in Style 5:20pm Despicable Me 3 6:55pm Lou 7:10pm Cars 3 Constantly outshined and outraced by a fleet of hi-tech rookies, former champ Lightning McQueen must find a new way to win.

9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 11:20pm Going in Style 1:00am Special

7:00am 9:45am 10:00am 10:15am 10:30am 11:00am 12:30pm 12:55pm 3:00pm

9:30am 10:30am 11:30am 12:00pm 12:30pm 1:00pm 1:30pm 3:00pm 3:30pm 4:00pm 4:30pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 6:00pm 6:30pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 7:55pm 10:00pm

7:00am Milkshake!

11:05am Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 11:35am Britain's Greatest Bridges 11:50am Police Interceptors 12:50pm Police Interceptors 1:45pm The Cowboys 4:15pm Joe Kidd 5:50pm Space Cowboys 8:00pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

9:00pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

9:55pm 5 News 10:00pm The Lonely Life of George Michael 12:00am The Nation's Favourite George Michael Song 1:00am The Last Days of George Michael 2:00am Super Casino

7:00am Ready Player One: Special 7:30am Going in Style 9:10am Despicable Me 3 10:45am Lou 11:00am Cars 3 12:50pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 3:10pm Unforgettable 4:55pm Special 5:25pm Despicable Me 3 7:00pm Cars 3 9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 11:20pm Unforgettable 1:10am Going in Style When their pension pots disappear overnight, a trio of cash-strapped retirees decide to rob a Brooklyn bank.

2:50am Chokeslam

9:00am Football's Greatest 9:30am EFL Goals: Championship 10:00am EFL Goals: League One and League Two 10:30am Sunday Supplement 12:00pm EFL Goals: Championship 12:30pm EFL Goals: League One and League Two 1:00pm Football 3:30pm SPFL Greatest Games 3:45pm SPFL Greatest Games 4:00pm La Liga Greatest Games 4:10pm Info not available 6:15pm La Liga Greatest Games 6:25pm Info not available 8:30pm La Liga Greatest Games 8:40pm Info not available 10:45pm La Liga Icons

9:00am 9:30am 10:00am 10:15am 10:30am 10:45am 11:00am 11:30am 12:00pm 12:15pm 12:30pm 1:00pm 1:30pm 4:00pm 6:15pm 8:30pm 11:15pm 11:45pm

Football Countdowns Football's Greatest Football's Greatest Teams Scottish Cup Greatest Games Scottish Cup Greatest Games La Liga Greatest Games La Liga Greatest Games La Liga Show Football's Greatest One2eleven One2eleven La Liga Show Football's Greatest Football Gillette Soccer Special Football Football SPFL Matters La Liga Preview

SATURDAY 11:00am Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30pm Classic Mary Berry 1:00pm Football Focus 2:00pm BBC News 2:10pm Weather 2:15pm Bargain Hunt 3:00pm MasterChef 3:30pm MasterChef 4:00pm Shrek Forever After 5:25pm Final Score 6:10pm A Question of Sport 6:40pm Doodlebugs 7:00pm Ready or Not 7:30pm BBC News 7:40pm Regional News 7:43pm Weather 7:45pm Pointless 8:35pm Who Dares Wins 9:20pm Casualty 10:10pm Troy: Fall of a City 11:10pm BBC News 11:25pm Weather

7:40am Naomi's Nightmares of Nature 8:10am The Pets Factor 8:30am Dengineers 9:00am Absolute Genius: Monster Builds 9:30am Beyond Bionic 10:00am Robot Wars 11:00am Gordon Buchanan: Elephant Family and Me 12:00pm Six Puppies and Us 12:55pm The Ladykillers: Pest Detectives 2:00pm Cromwell 4:15pm Canterbury Cathedral 5:15pm The Secret Helpers 6:15pm Big Cats About the House 7:15pm Easter from King's 8:30pm Dad's Army 9:00pm Attenborough's Wonder of Eggs 10:00pm Hamlet

12:25pm 1:25pm 1:30pm 2:30pm 3:00pm 4:00pm 5:00pm 6:00pm 7:00pm 7:15pm 7:30pm 8:00pm 9:30pm 11:00pm 11:20pm

Thunderbirds are Go Wishfart ITV News Saturday Morning with James Martin Who's Doing the Dishes?

ITV Lunchtime News Info not available Britain's Brightest Family Tenable Celebrity Catchphrase Tipping Point The Chase ITV Evening News Regional News and Weather You've Been Framed!

Info not available The Voice UK ITV News Info not available

4:15pm 6:15pm 8:40pm 10:45pm 11:00pm 1:05am 1:35am 2:30am 3:00am 3:30am 4:00am

Football EFL Greatest Games EFL Greatest Games EFL Greatest Games SPFL Matters Soccer A.M. SPFL Matters Info not available Gillette Soccer Saturday Gillette Soccer Saturday Football Info not available La Liga Icons Football EFL Goals: Championship Magical Messi EFL Goals: Championship Football's Greatest EFL Goals: Championship Football Years

SUNDAY 11:00am Live Worship on Easter Sunday 12:00pm Urbi et Orbi 12:25pm The Silent Child 12:45pm Bargain Hunt 1:25pm BBC News 1:35pm Weather for the Week Ahead 1:40pm Shaun the Sheep Movie 3:00pm MasterChef 5:30pm Escape to the Country 6:00pm Songs of Praise 6:35pm BBC News 6:50pm Regional News 6:55pm Weather 7:00pm The Big Painting Challenge 8:00pm Countryfile 9:00pm The Generation Game 10:00pm Ordeal by Innocence

9:35am Countryfile 10:30am Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:00pm Spring Kitchen with Tom Kerridge 12:45pm Lorraine Pascale: How to be a Better Cook 1:15pm MOTD2 Extra 2:00pm Info not available 2:15pm Pilgrimage: The Road to Santiago 3:15pm Canterbury Cathedral 4:15pm RAF at 100 with Ewan and Colin Mcgregor 5:45pm War Horse 8:00pm Down the Mighty River with Steve Backshall 9:00pm Top Gear 10:00pm Unsealed: Conspiracy Files

8:35am The Tom and Jerry Show 8:50am Teen Titans Go! 9:10am Mr. Bean: The Animated Series 9:30am Spy School 10:05am Adventure Time 10:25am ITV News 10:30am Love Your Garden 10:55am The Voice UK 12:25pm Info not avalable 2:00pm Free Willy 4:05pm Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory 6:00pm The Chase: Celebrity Special 7:00pm You've Been Framed!

7:30pm ITV Evening News 7:45pm Regional News and Weather 8:00pm Info not available 9:00pm The Durrells 10:00pm The Good Karma Hospital

Made in Chelsea The Crystal Maze The Goldbergs The Goldbergs The Goldbergs The Goldbergs Info not available The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Goldbergs Brooklyn Nine-Nine Young Sheldon The Big Bang Theory Info not available Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 11:00pm The Inbetweeners 11:30pm The Inbetweeners 12:00am The Big Bang Theory

The schedules for the television programme pages are provided by an external company: we regret that any changes or errors are not the responsibility of RTN.

30th March - 5th April

25

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MONDAY 11:00am Homes Under the Hammer 12:00pm The Sheriffs are Coming 12:45pm Claimed and Shamed 1:15pm Bargain Hunt 2:00pm BBC News 2:15pm Regional News 2:20pm Weather 2:25pm Father Brown 3:10pm Garden Rescue 3:55pm Escape to the Country 4:40pm Money for Nothing 5:25pm Flog It! 6:15pm Pointless 7:00pm BBC News 7:20pm Regional News 7:25pm Weather 7:30pm Celebrity Mastermind 8:00pm The One Show 8:30pm MasterChef 9:00pm EastEnders 9:30pm Classic Mary Berry

7:45am Money for Nothing 8:30am Nature's Weirdest Events 9:30am Gnomeo and Juliet 10:45am Rise of the Guardians 12:15pm The Super League Show 1:00pm Funny Lady 3:15pm Trust Me, I'm a Vet 4:15pm Indian Ocean with Simon Reeve 5:15pm Patagonia: Earth's Secret Paradise 6:15pm Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 7:00pm Eggheads 7:30pm The Repair Shop 8:00pm Top Gear 9:00pm Only Connect 9:30pm University Challenge 10:00pm Dave Allen at Peace 11:00pm The Unique Dave Allen 11:30pm Z for Zachariah 1:00am Unsealed: Conspiracy Files

Record Breakers Mission Employable Dragonheart Free Willy 3: The Rescue Info not available ITV Lunchtime News Regional News and Weather Judge Rinder Dickinson's Real Deal Tipping Point The Chase Paul O'grady: For the Love of Dogs Regional News and Weather ITV Evening News Emmerdale Coronation Street The Kyle Files Coronation Street Marcella ITV News at Ten and Weather

9:00am How I Met Your Mother 9:30am How I Met Your Mother 10:00am New Girl 10:30am New Girl 11:00am 2 Broke Girls 12:00pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 12:30pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 1:00pm The Goldbergs 1:30pm The Goldbergs 2:00pm The Big Bang Theory 2:30pm The Big Bang Theory 3:00pm Step Up 4: Miami Heat 5:00pm The Big Bang Theory 5:30pm The Big Bang Theory 6:00pm The Big Bang Theory 8:00pm Hollyoaks 8:30pm Ice Age: The Great Egg-Scapade 9:00pm The Big Bang Theory 9:30pm Young Sheldon 10:00pm Made in Chelsea 11:00pm Don't Tell the Bride Ireland

7:00am Milkshake!

10:15am The Wright Stuff 12:15pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

1:05pm 5 News 1:10pm Home and Away 1:40pm Neighbours 2:10pm Seven Brides for Seven Brothers 4:10pm Oliver!

7:00pm Neighbours 7:30pm Home and Away 7:55pm 5 News 8:00pm The Yorkshire Vet Casebook 9:00pm Police Interceptors 10:00pm Paddington Station 24/7 11:00pm Police UK: Armed and Deadly 12:05am Caught on Camera 12:30am Football on 5 1:30am Football on 5 2:00am Super Casino 4:10am Inside Manchester's Midland Hotel

7:00am 8:45am 10:20am 10:35am 12:25pm

Unforgettable Despicable Me 3 Lou Cars 3 Spider-Man: Homecoming 2:45pm Despicable Me 3 4:30pm 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain 6:15pm Lou 6:30pm Cars 3 8:30pm Special 9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming Tom Holland is Peter Parker - an average teen with a web-slinging alter ego who must protect New York City from a menacing new villain 11:20pm 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain 1:05am Unforgettable

9:00am Football's Greatest 9:30am Football's Greatest 10:00am EFL Goals: Championship 10:30am EFL Goals: League One and League Two 11:00am EFL Rivalries 11:30am EFL Rivalries 12:00pm Stars of Russia: Mane 12:15pm Stars of Russia: Firmino 12:30pm EFL Goals: Championship 1:00pm EFL Goals: League One and League Two 1:30pm Football 4:00pm Gillette Soccer Special 6:00pm EFL Greatest Games 6:15pm Football 8:30pm Football 11:00pm SPFL Round Up 2017/18 11:15pm SPFL Greatest Games 11:30pm MLS Round Up Show

10:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30am This Morning 1:30pm Loose Women 2:30pm ITV Lunchtime News 2:55pm Regional News and Weather 3:00pm Judge Rinder 4:00pm Dickinson's Real Deal 5:00pm Tipping Point 6:00pm The Chase 7:00pm Regional News and Weather 7:30pm ITV Evening News 8:00pm Emmerdale 8:30pm 100 Year Old Driving School 9:00pm Info not available 10:00pm Info not available 11:00pm ITV News at Ten and Weather 11:30pm Regional News and Weather

9:30am How I Met Your Mother 10:00am New Girl 11:00am 2 Broke Girls 12:00pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 12:30pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 1:00pm The Goldbergs 1:30pm The Goldbergs 2:00pm The Big Bang Theory 3:00pm How I Met Your Mother 3:30pm How I Met Your Mother 4:00pm New Girl 5:00pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 5:30pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 6:00pm The Goldbergs 6:30pm The Goldbergs 7:00pm The Big Bang Theory 7:30pm The Big Bang Theory 8:00pm Hollyoaks 8:30pm Extreme Cake Makers 9:00pm Night at the Museum

10:15am The Wright Stuff 12:15pm Can't Pay? We'll Take it Away!

1:10pm 5 News 1:15pm GPs: Behind Closed Doors 2:10pm Access 2:15pm Home and Away 2:45pm Neighbours 3:15pm NCIS 4:15pm Abducting Zoe 6:00pm 5 News 6:30pm Neighbours 7:00pm Home and Away 7:30pm 5 News 8:00pm The Yorkshire Vet Casebook 9:00pm Secrets of the National Trust with Alan Titchmarsh 10:00pm Everest: World's Greatest Mountain 11:00pm Sabotage 1:10am Police Interceptors

5:15am Gadget Gang in Outer Space 7:00am 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain 8:55am Whisky Galore!

10:50am Cars 3 12:45pm Run the Tide 2:35pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 5:00pm Cars 3 6:50pm Special 7:20pm Run the Tide 9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 11:20pm Unforgettable 1:05am 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain 2:55am The Beguiled 4:45am Special 5:15am Gadget Gang in Outer Space

1:00pm SPFL Round Up 2017/18 1:15pm SPFL Greatest Games 1:30pm MLS Round Up Show 2:00pm La Liga Icons 2:15pm La Liga Icons 3:00pm Eredivisie 4:00pm Football's Greatest 4:30pm Football's Greatest Teams 5:00pm Scottish Cup Greatest Games 5:30pm La Liga Greatest Games 6:00pm Football Years 6:30pm Football Countdowns 7:00pm SPFL Round Up 2017/18 7:15pm SPFL Greatest Games 7:30pm MLS Round Up Show 8:00pm EFL Greatest Games

9:50am 10:20am 10:25am 12:25pm 2:10pm 2:40pm 2:55pm 3:00pm 4:00pm 5:00pm 6:00pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 7:45pm 8:00pm 8:30pm 9:00pm 9:30pm 10:00pm 11:00pm

TUESDAY 11:00am Homes Under the Hammer 12:00pm The Sheriffs are Coming 12:45pm Claimed and Shamed 1:15pm Bargain Hunt 2:00pm BBC News 2:30pm Regional News 2:45pm Moving On 3:30pm Escape to the Continent 4:30pm Money for Nothing 5:15pm Flog It! 6:15pm Pointless 7:00pm BBC News 7:30pm Regional News 8:00pm The One Show 8:30pm EastEnders 9:00pm Holby City 10:00pm Come Home 11:00pm BBC News 11:30pm Regional News

10:00am Victoria Derbyshire 12:00pm BBC Newsroom Live 12:30pm Westminster in Review 1:00pm Golf 2:00pm The Super League Show 2:45pm Plan it, Build it 3:15pm Trust Me, I'm a Vet 4:15pm Indian Ocean with Simon Reeve 5:15pm Patagonia: Earth's Secret Paradise 6:15pm Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 7:00pm Eggheads 7:30pm The Repair Shop 8:00pm Attenborough's Wonder of Eggs 9:00pm Great Indian Railway Journeys 10:00pm Hospital 11:00pm Cunk on Britain

The schedules for the television programme pages are provided by an external company: we regret that any changes or errors are not the responsibility of RTN.

28

30th March - 5th April

WEDNESDAY 4:30pm 5:15pm 6:15pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 8:00pm 9:00pm 10:00pm 11:00pm 11:30pm 11:40pm 11:45pm 12:15am

Money for Nothing Flog It! Pointless BBC News Regional News The One Show MasterChef Patrick Kielty Doc BBC News Regional News Weather A Question of Sport Lenny Henry: The Commonwealth Kid

3:00pm 4:00pm

Trust Me, I'm a Vet Indian Ocean with Simon Reeve 5:00pm Patagonia: Earth's Secret Paradise 6:00pm Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 7:00pm Eggheads 7:30pm The Repair Shop 8:00pm Today at the Games 9:00pm The Secret Helpers 10:00pm The Assassination of Gianni Versace American Crime Story 10:50pm Live at the Apollo

5:00pm 6:00pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 8:00pm 8:30pm 9:00pm 9:30pm 10:00pm 11:00pm 11:30pm 11:45pm

Tipping Point The Chase Regional News and Weather ITV Evening News Emmerdale Coronation Street Britain's Brightest Family Coronation Street Benidorm ITV News at Ten and Weather Regional News and Weather UEFA Champions League Highlights

3:30pm

How I Met Your Mother 4:00pm New Girl 4:30pm New Girl 5:00pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 5:30pm Brooklyn Nine-Nine 6:00pm The Goldbergs 6:30pm The Goldbergs 7:00pm The Big Bang Theory 8:00pm Hollyoaks 8:30pm Extreme Cake Makers 9:00pm The Goldbergs 9:30pm The Big Bang Theory 10:00pm Timeless 11:00pm Naked Attraction 12:05am The Big Bang Theory

4:15pm 6:00pm 6:30pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 8:00pm

First Class Fear 5 News Neighbours Home and Away 5 News The Yorkshire Vet Casebook 9:00pm GPs: Behind Closed Doors 10:00pm Housing Yorkshire: Somewhere to Call Home 11:00pm Why Do Men Earn More Than Women?

12:05am Murder on the Internet 1:05am When Kids Kill

5:15am

Gadget Gang in Outer Space 7:00am Whisky Galore!

8:55am 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain 10:50am Cars 3 12:50pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 3:15pm Chokeslam 5:00pm Special 5:30pm Run the Tide 7:10pm Cars 3 9:00pm Spider-Man: Homecoming 11:20pm Insyriated 1:00am 6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain

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30th March - 5th April

by Barry Duke

A LESSON I learned on the very first day I took a holiday in Spain decades before I settled here, is that one shot of one’s favourite tipple is roughly the equivalent of three measures in the UK. It was a lesson I never forgot because I spent the first two days of my holiday in Sitges driving the porcelain bus in my selfcatering apartment and nursing two black eyes sustained when a lamp post came out of the blue and hit me in the face.

The only time I was ever that ill was two years earlier on a choppy crossing from the UK to Holland. When I told the Dutch barman on the ferry that I had never been on a sea trip before and was concerned that I might suffer motion sickness, he said “I have just the thing that will make sure you stay ok.”

He reached for a bottle marked Genever, explained that it was a form of medicinal gin created especially in the Netherlands for nervous landlubbers and that it would guarantee me a trouble-free passage.

After I necked four - or was it five large ones? - I fell off my bar stool and crawled to the deck, where I spent almost eight hours hanging over the side chucking up a week’s intake of food into the roiling North

29

Boozers and bruises Sea. The hangover that followed lasted three days.

Unlike my brush with alcohol poisoning in Sitges, this was not a self-inflicted episode. In this case I was the victim of a Dutch practical joke and I vowed that if I ever met that barman again I would drown him in a tank of Genever.

Now you can forgive firsttime visitors to Spain for overindulging. They simply aren’t aware of how generous the spirit measures are. The results are rarely pretty, although sometimes amusing.

A while back an attractive young newcomer to Benidorm got chatting to me in a pub and asked whether I would give him a tour of the many gay bars in the Old Town. At the time he appeared totally sober and I readily agreed.

We were in our third pub when he popped out for a cigarette. When he failed to return after 15 minutes I went out to find him. He was nowhere to be seen.

Just then a Spanish guy shouted out to me and pointed to a nearby wheelie bin.

Puzzled, I looked in, and there was Brett, comatose in the rubbish. It took me a while to revive him, and half an hour get him sober enough to tell me where he was staying.

BEWARE: The demon drink!

Naturally, I felt partly responsible for him getting into that state, and felt obliged to bundle him in a taxi and accompany him back to his hotel.

I understand that people can inadvertently get plastered by not realising how large and inexpensive alcohol measures here can be, but I have no sympathy for those who

set out with the sole aim of getting crocked in the shortest time possible, then end up disgracing themselves by throwing up in the street, walking into walls, and getting beaten up after picking fights with strangers.

Far worse, some die as a result of falling off, or jumping from balconies. A couple of years back Spanish media reported that, in a five-year period, more than a dozen people were killed in jumps or falls from balconies, mainly in the Balearic Islands, and that the Son Espases hospital in Palma de Majorca - a major trauma centre - had treated 46 people for serious injuries at cost to the Spanish economy of €1.5 million.

More than 60 per cent of those treated were from the UK, and almost all were drunk at the time of their accidents.

Most Spanish people I speak to simply cannot understand why foreign visitors feel the need to abuse alcohol in this way.

Spain, despite having the largest number of bars in the EU - almost 300,000 - has virtually no problems with drunkenness and alcoholism, according to a 2015 El Pais report, which also said that Spain enjoys the best life expectancy and health in the EU. Sure, the Spanish like their drink, but would rather die than publicly disgrace themselves by getting smashed in the way far too many tourists do.

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30th March - 5th April Photo Credit: Sludge G flickr

Yer ‘tis

by Colin Bird The opinions published in Colin’s weekly column are not necessarily representative of those of the publishers, advertisers or newspaper sponsors.

I FIND it amazing, but strangely satisfying, that a country the size of England can have such a collection of dialects that flourish within its limited borders and still remain distinctively diverse in spite of the mobility of the indigenous workforce.

It’s true that some accents have become watered down and because of

its proximity to London, my home town of Reading has developed its own strange amalgam of idioms, tinged with only the merest hint of the old rural dialect.

Thankfully the original Berkshire burr can still be found in the outlying towns and villages of the county where locals sit on five bar gates, chewing straw and playing banjos.

When it comes to the Newcastle dialect; well it remains a mystery to me.

I have a friend from my days spent abroad, who hails from that northeastern city who, when he gets excited, becomes almost unintelligible.

Having lived in East Anglia for many years, I became attuned to some of the subtle differences be-

THE SINGING POSTMAN: Hev Yew Gotta Loight Boi?

tween the Suffolk and Norfolk patois and often not picked up on by nonresidents.

I learned early on that this is a good thing, because offence can easily be taken if mistakenly identified as one of the foreigners from across the border.

The term ‘boy’ for example, when referring to a third party male, is one commonly used by both sides, but the pronunciation is slightly different and in Norfolk the word is pronounced ‘boi’, whereas in Suffolk he is simply addressed as ‘b’, pronounced ‘buh’.

An object lesson in word economy.

Someone once described the Norfolk dialect as a language encapsulated in its landscape, with long vowels and wide horizons. I suppose it was back in the 60’s that it became famous when a certain Allan Smethurst, aka The Singing Postman released a

record entitled ‘Hev Yew Gotta Loight Boi?’ The song was a huge success and soon had everyone mimicking it.

The Cornish brogue is another distinctive dialect and having lived in that lovely county for two years, it brings back warm memories of days long past. I remember the first time that I was greeted by one of the locals when he enquired: “Ow are ee me ‘ansum?”

It wasn’t that he had his eyes on me, but ‘me ‘ansum’, ‘me luverr’ and ‘me bird’ are common greetings in this south-west corner.

Going into Devon is regarded as crossing into England, and once just having returned from a weekend in Exeter, an old fisherman of my acquaintance enquired: “Egzeder! Likun diddy?”

I told him I likun’ed it a lot.

RTN Life

FUENGIROLA will once again host the 24th International People’s Fair and will include South Africa, Serbia, Puerto Rico and Ukraine for the first time.

The festivities will take place from April 27 to May 1, and will feature stalwarts like Britain, Holland, Chile, and Senegal among others.

It is a fair that allows people to show off the very best of their country’s folklore, cuisine and culture in general.

Mayor of Tourism, Rodrigo Romero,

Credit: Flickr, Antonio

Tourist town goes global

COLOUR CLASH: Dancers perform in the streets. said: “We want the 24th event to be the very best in the history of the People’s Fair, and every year it attracts more visitors and demands more effort from us.”

A total 33 countries will take part and the spaces of revelry will be expanded to cater for the increase in people both participating and spectating.

30th March - 5th April

31

food & drink This week Celebrity Chef from Ready Steady Cook & Master Chef Steven Saunders, proprietor of The Little Geranium in La Cala celebrates Good Friday traditionally with fresh fish…

An original fish recipe

Steven Saunders FMCGB The Little Geranium La Cala de Mijas & Marbella

www.thelittlegeranium.com EASTER is sometimes called Resurrection Sunday as it is a Christian festival celebrating the resurrection of Jesus from the dead.

Described in the New Testament as having occurred on the third day of his burial after his crucifixion by the Romans at Calvary in 30 AD. Most of us celebrate with chocolate eggs,

a symbol of birth, most children I speak with don’t seem to know the story of Jesus at Easter or the story of Good Friday and what it means but they love the chocolate!

The tradition of eating fish on Easter Friday (Good Friday) stems from the Roman Catholic custom to not eat warm-blooded animals on Fridays, to acknowledge and do penance for the death of Jesus.

According to Christianity, Jesus sacrificed his flesh on Good Friday, when he was executed and died for our sins. This is why the church encourages followers to abstain from meaty flesh on the anniversary of Christ’s death.

I have to admit that I don’t eat a lot of fish but that’s mainly because Michele (my wife) had fish poisoning a few years ago and now associates food poisoning with fish, silly I know! But I understand her phobia.

So when I do cook fish at home it is when Michele isn’t around. The last time she went off to dance with the Strictly Come Dancing team in the UK, I waved goodbye and went

straight to the fish market in Fuengirola. I bought lobster, prawns, monkfish, mussels, clams and razor clams and took them home and had a fish feast! A meal that God would be delighted to eat on Good Friday!

In our restaurant The Little Geranium we serve quite a lot of fish. We have hand-dived scallops from Cadiz, Norwegian salmon, Spanish lobsters, tuna from Tarifa, huge prawns from the Atlantic and sea bass. I buy fish daily as it is so popular. I also buy mussels and clams and langoustine for sauces.

So today I’m cooking fish but not traditionally so to speak. A couple of months ago I had a dream about fish and in the dream I made a pastry shaped fish, then when you cut through the pastry into the most divine soft fresh fish, the flavours and textures are great.

I googled the fish pastry thing thinking that I may have seen it and therefore it’s in my subconscious mind but I couldn’t find it.

That’s great news because it

means that it is original, chefs love to be original!

I remember cooking fish on Ready Steady Cook, someone brought me salmon and beetroots. I turned the ingredients into salmon ceviche with beetroot puree, beetroot cured salmon tartare, beetroot cured salmon ceviche, roasted beetroot salad and salmon with beetroot scales.

On the other side was Ainsley Harriott. I remember that he cooked a risotto. Whilst we were cooking I went over to his kitchen and said that his risotto needed more liquid.

“Thanks Chef” he said “now get back to your banquet!” When the audience voted they choose mushroom risotto over my banquet of five or six interesting dishes. Never again I thought, what ever you cook against Ainsley he will always win!

Sea bass in pastry with truffle cream (ingredients for two) 1 large 400+ grm sea bass cut into two fillets Approximately 500 grm of ready-made butter puff pastry A little truffle oil Seasoning Juice of 1 lemon Egg yolk for glazing 1 olive cut in half for garnish (fish eye) 2 tablespoons of finely chopped basil

For the truffle sauce 150 ml of thick cream 1 glass of white wine 1 teaspoon of finely chopped garlic 1 teaspoon of truffle pieces (optional) 1 tablespoon truffle oil Maldon salt

For basil oil

1 bunch of basil 1 large bunch of flat leaf parsley 3 large handfuls of spinach leaves 500 ml of good olive oil

Method

• Take the pastry and roll it into two 30 cm x 30 cm squares approx 2 mm thick.

• Take each square and cut in half vertically so that you now have four pieces of pastry sitting on the surface.

• In a very hot frying pan seal the sea bass fillets skin down

(so that the flesh does not touch the heat). Seal for about 20 seconds.

• Remove from pan and season the fish flesh with lemon juice and Maldon salt and remove the skin. The skin should peel off easily now that it is cooked.

• Cut each pastry piece into the shape of a fish. You now have four pieces of pastry in an identical fish shape.

• Place the two fillets of bass onto two of the fish shapes and spread a little of the shredded basil over each fillet with a little truffle oil.

• Now top with the other piece of fish-shaped pastry and press together.

• Finally score the fish with a knife at 45 degrees one way and then the same the other way to create the scale effect and cut the olive to resemble the fish eye and press the olive into the appropriate area.

• Brush well all over with the egg yolk and season the outside with a little Maldon salt.

• Put in a pre-heated oven 180c for seven minutes until the pastry is golden brown and serve with the truffle cream on the side.

Truffle sauce (Cream) Method

• In a thick bottomed saucepan pour a little cooking white wine in and reduce a little over a high heat.

• Now add the garlic and the cream and cook out for five minutes on a medium heat.

• Finally add the truffle pieces and the truffle oil and

taste and season.

Basil oil

If you want to do the basil oil you simply take the basil and the parsley and the spinach (spinach helps the colour). Drop these greens into boiling water for 10 seconds and remove and shock immediately in iced water with ice cubes to stop the greens from continuing to cook.

Remove and squeeze all the water out. Finally blend the greens in the food processor with the olive oil for at least five mins and then pass through either a fine sieve or better still some muslin cloth to remove the green sediment leaving only the green oil. Decant into squeezy plastic bottles and keep in the fridge for up to a week.

You can email Steven your questions or enquiries to: steven@thelittlegeranium.com.

Steven Saunders FMCGB - The Little Geranium, La Cala de Mijas & Marbella www.thelittlegeranium.com

32

30th March - 5th April

PEP GUARDIOLA was fined about £20,000 (€22,000) by the FA for using a political symbol and making political statements at a sporting event.

Pep said that ‘they’ did not understand what it was about, well Pep let’s see what we do understand!

The latest anarchy started when the previous president, Mas, held an illegal referendum and was fined five million euros and is now facing criminal charges. He was unable to get enough support to continue and put forward Puigdemont as president.

The Spanish prime minister immediately gave his deputy Soraya Sáenz de Santamaría the job to negotiate a solution to the problem and she held meetings with Puigdemont.

Prime Minister Rajoy and the King also met with Puigdemont and Rajoy held meetings with the opposition groups.

The fiscal general presented their argument to the Supreme Court and the court ruled that it was illegal and ordered the Catalan Mossos Police

Photo Credit: Pep Team Twitter

by David Hudson

Is Pep right about the English? to seize all ballot boxes, documents and papers. They ignored the order and the Guardia Civil tried to carry out the order finding a large number of boxes and papers in the Barcelona FC stadium.

Puigdemont announced the date for the ballot. The first time I realised that this was going to be a violent ballot was the week before when Puigdemont held a rally in Tarragona. The emotive language was a carrion call to fight for independence. The following week the university students joined the extremists looking for a fight.

The schools were shown a propaganda film with five-yearolds waving the Republic flag, telling the students to fight for independence. A group of children, some sucking dummies, blocked a carriageway with protest signs.

Eight professors were charged with inciting violence

Basic Spanish for everyday needs

by Jane Cronin

IN the last article we started looking at the difference between closed and open questions, and how to form them. The explanation for this takes a bit of time, but it is worth making the effort because it gives us the key to asking questions properly in Spanish, and therefore getting the replies we are looking for!

Last week we said that a closed question is one that calls for a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer. “Do you live in Spain?” is a closed question, as the initial response is ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Of course in reality we would rarely answer with just one word as this would sound too abrupt. We would probably say “Yes, I do actually” or “No, I don’t unfortunately”, or we would give more information: “Well yes I do most of the time, but we do visit family in the UK a couple of times a year”. However, these lengthier responses do not alter the fact that the original question is a closed one.

To make a closed question in Spanish, all we have to do is make an affirmative statement sound like a question with our voice. Here is the statement: “You live in Spain” - “Vives en España”. Now to make it a question: “Do you live in Spain?” -

to their students.

The violence spilled onto the circular roads with fires blocking the carriageways. Guardia Civil vans were destroyed, Mossos Police stood aside, even helping to return boxes and open the buildings.

This put heavy pressure on the National Police and the Guardia Civil. An overhead shot showed a thin line of police trying to hold back thousands of violent demonstrators.

Over 40 police officers were badly injured.

The Post Office did not release postal votes, 200 mayors refused to hold the vote and there was not a list of voters to check. One town with 7,000 people had 12,000 votes!

Puigdemont unilaterally announced independence. Half a million Catalans protested in Barcelona demanding to remain united with Spain.

With the majority of opposition

PEP GUARDIOLA: Wearing his yellow ribbon. support Rajoy got permission from the Senate house to activate Article 155 that allowed dissolution of the Catalan government and hold new elections. With the full support of both houses of parliament, Rajoy set about regaining Spanish soil since the unity in 1491.

Puigdemont and five cabinet members fled to Belgium. A number were arrested including the Mossos chief. Mossos special powers were reduced. The Guardia stopped the Mossos from burning tons of papers and found that €6.2 million were stolen from the taxpayers to pay for the campaign. At the latest demonstration for unity a speaker said that

the independistas want war.

Yes Pep we do know what is happening and as the Spanish King said, democracy was delicate and relied on everyone abiding by the constitution because it protects the vulnerable.

After the Second World War the British people decided that they would not go back to the old order.

They used parliament to achieve free health and education and benefit support for the vulnerable, not violence.

Pep you are in a country that believes in the law to achieve change, not ignore it, something that you have not grasped.

Open questions reason and so on.

“¿Vives en España?” There is no change in the order of the words, and neither do we include any equivalent of the word ‘Do’. As you can see, when writing the question we also add an upside down question mark at the front the sentence.

So, this is how we make an open question in Spanish. We start with the question word, or small group of words which create the question. Often this is one word: ‘Dónde’, ‘Cuándo ‘, ‘Quién’, but it can be two: ‘Por qué’, ‘De dónde’ and can also include other ideas: “Cuántos hijos” (How many children?) “De qué colour” (What colour?)

Here is a longer closed question which you will see adopts exactly the same principle.

“Does your brother’s wife play tennis on Saturdays”? To get to this in Spanish we first have to make it into a statement: “Your brother’s wife plays tennis on Saturdays”. Then we translate the statement making the question with our voice: “¿La mujer de tu hermano juega al tenis los sábados?”

So, what then are open questions, and how to do they work? An open question requires a response that consists of more information than just ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Also, an open question begins with what we call a ‘question word’. An easy example is: “Where do you live?” We cannot correctly answer ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to this, we are obliged by the question to name a loca-

The next item in the open question is the verb, giving us “¿Dónde vives? (Where do you live?) “¿Cuántos hijos tienes?”

(How many children have you got?) “¿Por qué estás corriendo?” (Why are you running?).

ASKING QUESTIONS: The Spanish way.

tion. Although it may sound obvious, it is also important to note the fact that the response is prompted by the question word itself. In other words ‘Where’ calls for the name of a place, ‘When’ asks for a time, ‘Who’ asks for a person, ‘Why’ asks for a

So far we have looked at examples that are addressing questions to ‘you’, that is questions in the second person. Although the structure might seem very easy, we need to keep it in mind to move on to asking questions in the third person, about ‘he’ or ‘she. We will look at that next week, and hopefully I’ll also have enough room for some more Spanish to translate.

See you then!

30th March - 5th April

33

Advertising Feature BEHIND our stylish Scandinavian designs are a modern state-of-theart convector heater that can match any on the market for economy and efficiency, and beats all the serious competition hands down on price.

The real secret of these heaters is the computer-age technology in the form of extruded aluminium in the construction of the heating element. This material and the design creates a huge surface area for heat transfer, which means more air can be heated for less cost.

Neater Heaters use convection principals and are designed so that the electricity you put into the heater is converted to heat as cheaply as possible. When you turn on the heater the element warms up rapidly and heats the air around it, this air rises and draws more cold air into the heater.

Because the element is extremely efficient and is designed to have a huge surface area a large quantity of air is heated very quickly.

If your room has the correct sized heater it will take about 20

Over recent years Neater Heaters have become the first choice of many expats living in Spain

NEATER HEATERS: Are stylish and effective. minutes to warm up from cold, after which the heater eases off and works at about two thirds capacity, (depending on various external influences).

Our heaters are not only efficient, effective, and economical, but as you would expect from a Scandinavian product, they are extremely stylish and practical.

There is a model that will suit anyone, whether it is the standard Adax heater, the stylish Beha heater, or the trendy Neo with digital controls and a choice of colours

and if you are limited for wall space then available for purchase are factory designed feet to enable the heater to be freestanding.

However, last year we went one stage further. We are now sole agents in Spain for the Turkish made Vigo heater. This heater shares the design technology and ethos of the current Neater Heaters, but it has two differences: The Vigo comes with a carrying handle, wall bracket, and feet included in the price; The larger Vigo models take up less wall space and go up to 2.5kw. They also have a digital display that indicates the reduced wattage that the heater regulates once the room has reached desired temperature, thus saving more money through reduced running costs.

Our website will let you know all about our products, and the FAQ section (Frequently Asked Questions) will hopefully clear up some questions you may have. It has an online shop, and also tells you the location of the outlet, or agent, nearest to you.

Alternately Neater Heater has a distributor offering local sales and support where you can view the products in Calahonda at The Bed Warehouse Spain Tel 634 187 700.

Heaters are also available for purchase at our online shop www.neaterheater.es with free home delivery or call 634 312 171.

34

30th March - 5th April

Puzzles Code Breaker Kenny Corris I For Readings, Consultations and Castings email: kennycorris@hotmailcom / www.kennycorris.net Mobile: 686 361 594 / Tel: 965 878 424

Play on Words

Answers: Down to earth.

The Cat in the Hat.

A time for you to take a back seat and let someone else do the work for a change. After all it is only now that you can take a well-deserved break. As Taurus welcomes Venus this week, it’s all about loving yourself enough to let things happen, and to enjoy some downtime.

Indulge yourself knowing that you’ve earned rest and relaxation.

Word Wheel The goal of a word wheel puzzle is to create as many words possible with the letters in the word wheel. You can only use each letter once and every word must have the letter in the centre of the wheel.

Can you find the 9 letter word?

With Venus entering into Taurus, love comes in at all levels. You seem to have the idea that your heart is not for sharing right now; but the powerful forces of the Cosmos and the exaltation of the Goddess of Love, Venus, may very well mean that things are about to change. An affair of the heart is much closer than you could ever imagine!

Mercury squares on Mars which brings timbre to something that you have up your sleeve, and shows you that you are now really on the right track. Mercury’s speedy and communicative energies are backed all the way by an ebullient Mars, and anything can happen, and it most probably will be just the icing on your cake.

You are moody and angry and though you have every right to feel this way, why not turn this around? You need to know that you can, and that others are looking to you to come up with appropriate solutions; before it is too late!

Mercury squares up to Saturn, and those delay tactics you are so fond of won’t work this time around.

The Sun conjuncts with Mercury and the time has come to lay your cards on the table. Someone is being evasive and as you rightly suspect there is more behind a recent request, which you have to turn down for all the right reasons. Being open yourself now proves that you have nothing to hide and it will finally stop those tongues wagging.

A focus on your home this week as a long awaited project unfolds on the domestic front. Your home is your comfort and your joy, but it’s time to ring the changes. Venus squares up to Ceres midweek, and this allows you to cope amongst the temporary chaos. This is a great chance to de clutter since then you can love more what’s left!

Venus enters into your twin Planet of Taurus, bringing renewed energies and a plausible change of heart too. Your bark has always been worse than your bite, but you have been sending out the wrong messages lately. Take time to ensure others that though you are not to be messed with, that you really do have your heart in the right place.

Mars features with both Saturn and Mercury this week.

Whilst you are powerful in your energies you are still waiting for an opportunity to put your skills into good use.

Multitalented and known for your hard work, it is time that you used your inspiration for the good of those who need both your love and your protection right now.

Great at planning, you have a chance to highlight your considerable skills this week; and you may even surprise yourself into the bargain. Mars conjuncts with Saturn midweek which means that you are experiencing some kind of delay in other directions, but it’s full steam ahead for you to showcase your organising talents.

You are beginning to get cold feet about something you’re involved in. In hindsight you would never have got involved, but since you are you are too proud to admit that you are in this up to your neck, and if you knew what was really going on you would never have got involved. Somebody truly has moved those goalposts!

Venus has left your Planetary leader, Uranus and enters into Taurus this week. Whilst there is a glimmer of love out there on the horizon you are not connecting as you should, neither are you able to seize an opportunity that has come your way. Things may be too good to be true right now but all your hard work needs to be rewarded.

Look back and see just how far you have come lately. You seem to be taking some time to prioritise a way of using your skills and artistry, which is where your energies are right now. Believing in yourself will bring you dividends this week as Love abounds, with Venus getting to know the truly powerful energies of an inspiring Taurus.

Each number in the Code Breaker grid represents a different letter of the alphabet. In this week’s puzzle, 11 represents V and 19 represents R, so fill in V every time the figure 11 appears and R every time the figure 19 appears. Now, using your knowledge of the English language, work out which letters should go in the missing squares. As you discover the letters, fill in other squares with the same number in the main grid and the control grid.

Kenny’s Postbag Kenny, Finances are at an all-time low. I find it hard to ask for anything generally, but I am begging now because I cannot go on. I have to make a decision do I go or do I stay?

Esme A. Esme, it’s not wrong to ask for what you deserve. Money isn’t wrong, but the distribution of it stinks. There are people so rich they do not know what to do with their wealth, and others dying at this moment with malnutrition. We float around in the middle somewhere, since money comes and goes and you have to find a way to make some money stick around. It isn’t fair and it isn’t easy either.

Talk to Spirit. Ask what’s best for you. Ask for the work that will reward you financially. If you do go then you are moving on not running away!

Kenny Corris

Don't forget to email or message me with your Postbag Questions!. Check out my new website: www.kennycorris.net

For Birthday Celebrants Love holds it all together for you, and it starts within. Where there were nagging doubts back in the past, now there is hope. Allow the combined efforts of the Cosmos to steer you to where you should be, and look for that silver lining.

The 9 letter word is:

Kakuro Fill all the empty squares using the numbers 1 to 9, so that the sum of each horizontal block equals the ‘clue’ on its left, and the sum of each vertical block equals the clue on its top. No number may be used in the same block more than once.

30th March - 5th April

More Puzzles Cryptic

Across 1 Sides reported swarms (5) 4 Sea bird can be cooked slowly (7) 8 They help make curls and waves (7) 9 The belief is that I am God returning (5) 10 They've been held by the innkeeper for a long time (8) 11 Not much of a fall? (4) 13 An American metal somewhere in Texas (6) 14 Nicked bundle of pound notes (6) 17 Prepare to leave the group (4) 19 To begin with I read revelation in Times' article naming the nuisance (8) 22 Brew some magic up pal (5) 23 Life jacket from same wet components (3,4) 24 Records the unmarried ones (7) 25 Spread mangled tapes (5)

English - Spanish

Futoshiki

Down 1 Set fire to a bit of toast or charcoal (5) 2 Listens, sort of, then joins up (7) 3 Written outline shows no care, is sloppy (8) 4 The coach, little Edward, is out of order (6) 5 A first-class lawyer in Verdi opera (4) 6 Something refined brought back from Ragusa (5) 7 Late Greek god betraying no emotion (7) 12 Start playing new super kit (6,2) 13 Small glasses around at views (7) 15 The Parisian reads out editorials (7) 16 Public transport around park for vagrants (6) 18 Some of Al Capone's mob are chicken (5) 20 In court it heard about church tax (5) 21 Social sphere (4)

Fill in the squares so that each digit from 1 to 6 occurs exactly once in each row and column. Greater-than and less-than signs indicate the relationship of the two adjacent squares. There is only one solution, and you can find it without guessing.

The clues are mixed, some clues are in Spanish and some are in English.

Across 1 Tablecloth (6) 4 Cerveza (4) 8 Queen (5) 9 Notice (warning) (5) 10 Courgette (9) 14 Mejilla (5) 15 Beret (5) 16 Buttonhole (of

garment) (4) 17 August (6) Down 1 Girar (llave, manivela, volante) (4) 2 Spring (season) (9) 3/15 Bolsita de tĂŠ

(3,3) 5 Buildings (houses, offices etc) (9) 6 Tejado (4) 7 Cow (4) 11 Pregunta (4) 12 Leisure (4) 13 Hand (4) 15 See 3

Quick

Across 1 Underground parts of plants (5) 3 Smears (7) 6 Public toilet in a military area (7) 8 Drinking chocolate (5) 10 Be in accord (5) 11 Graceful and stylish in appearance or manner (7) 14 Suitable for use as food (6) 15 Cubicles (6) 17 Wet slightly (7) 20 Relating to audible sound (5) 21 Form a critical opinion of (5) 22 Educational institution (7) 23 Adjudicator (7) 24 Lone-Star state (5) Down 1 Let go free (7) 2 Grab hold of (5) 3 Strainer (5) 4 Brother of your father or mother (5) 5 Not full or plentiful (5) 7 Frightened badly (9) 9 Dare (9) 12 Fewer (4) 13 Being nothing more than specified (4) 16 Triumph (7) 17 Army officer (5) 18 Belonging to them (5) 19 Recess in a wall (5) 20 Separate into parts or portions (5)

35

Word Ladder Can you by changing 1 letter at a time, get from the first word to the last word in the given number of moves?

BLUE 1 2 3 4

COAT

Sudoku

Fill the grid so every column and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1-9

36

30th March - 5th April

More Puzzles Irregular Soduku Wordsearch:

iCarly FREDDIE BENSON LEWBERT SR. HOWARD CARLY SHAY COSTELA SAM PUCKETT GUPPY MIRANDA GIBBY CHUCK TED FRANKLIN NATHAN

Quiz

the Greater Pittsburgh area in 1967 and NIGHT, 6. 1960s - it was introduced in 3. CHEESE, 4. OLIVER!, 5. TWELFTH 1. AMBROSIA, 2. MICHAEL GOVE, Answers

Not a lot of people know that… rice is the staple food of more than one-half of the world’s population

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

nationwide in 1968, 7. YIDDISH,

from which language?

8. To what foodstuff does the cartoon character Popeye attributed his strength?

9. Which famous US actor founded a line of food products with writer A E Hotchner in 1982? The brand started with salad dressing but has expanded to include pasta sauce, lemonade, popcorn, salsa, and wine, among other things.

10. Which journalist, broadcaster, television personality, gourmet and food writer is the daughter of a former Chancellor of the Exchequer? NIGELLA

DOWN 2. 4 across minus 27 down 3. Nine times 23 across 4. 29 across plus 24 down 5. 10 across minus 19 across 7. 14 across plus 26 down 8. 15 down minus 16 across 9. Two thirds of 12 across 11. 15 down squared 13. 16 down squared 15. Twice 25 across 16. See 10 across 20. 30 across squared 22. 2 down plus 14 across 23. Twice 14 across 24. See 4 down 26. 14 across plus 27 down 27. See 2 down 28. See 16 across

8. SPINACH, 9. PAUL NEWMAN,

October 16 is World Food Day 1. According to classical mythology, what was the food and drink of the gods and any mortals who ate it became immortal?

2. Appointed in June 2017 to replace Andrea Leadsom, who is the current Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs?

3. Cantal, Caboc, Fontina, Leerdammer and Vacherin are all varieties of which foodstuff?

4. Food, Glorious Food is the opening song from which 1960s West End and Broadway musical and 1968 film?

5. ‘If music be the food of love, play on’ is a famous line from which of Shakespeare’s comedies?

6. In which decade did the fast food restaurant chain McDonald's introduce its famous Big Mac hamburger in the US? 7. The slang term for food ‘nosh’ originally comes

ACROSS 1. A third of 10 across 4. 22 across plus 14 across 6. 23 across squared 10. A fifth of 16 down 12. 4 across plus 28 down 13. 21 across plus 24 down 14. See 4 across 16. 14 across plus 28 down 17. 22 down times 19 across 18. 27 down times 29 across 19. Three times 24 down 21. 7 down plus 14 across 22. 9 down plus 24 down 23. Three times 4 across 25. 13 across minus 14 across 27. 12 across squared 29. 13 across plus 5 down 30. Four times 14 across

10. NIGELLA LAWSON

Cross Figure

JERRY

30th March - 5th April

More Puzzles Giant Crossword ACROSS 1 Not meant to be heard by the audience, in a way 8 Blend in 13 Maker of stringed instruments 20 Author Huffington 21 Nary a soul 22 In a group 23 Give a nonnative a smooch?

25 Causes of sudden fear 26 Env. alerter 27 Small drink 28 Make up for 29 Defeat Dorothy's dog decisively?

34 Trip to an underworld river?

39 Singer Buddy 40 Egg 42 Stools, say 43 Actress Mendes 44 Certain Siouan 45 "The Jerk" actor M. Walsh 47 "Well well!"

48 Use a pool 49 Specialty of Windy City bakeries?

52 Uses Dixie diction 54 Door turner 55 Expire, as a subscription 59 Ballpark fig.

60 New princess of '81 63 One who doesn't succumb to a potent toxin?

68 Clean energy org.

69 Bombard with ejunk 71 "Zip DooDah" 72 Hard wood 73 Glorious state of bliss?

79 Military units 82 Prefix with hazard 83 Achieve

84 ObiWan Kenobi, e.g.

85 Rob 88 Desert haven mentioned in the first book of the Bible?

94 Guitars' kin, for short 95 Actor Rob 99 Bits of matter 100 Car for a VIP 101 Mr., in India 102 Have a cow, with "out" 103 Ltr. insert 104 Arrangement 105 Ruler of the Sunflower State?

108 Palpitation?

111 Menu fish 112 Audiotapes' successors 114 Cato's 1,052 115 Main female character 118 Stuff hauled by Beantown trash collectors?

124 Not ceasing 125 Homer work 126 St. (capital of Loire) 127 Mice and whales, e.g.

128 "The Rose" singer Midler 129 Plunder DOWN 1 Hard wood 2 Wk. day 3 Hi (old LP players) 4 Moms 5 Notoriety 6 Noted berry farm founder 7 Turn a deaf (ignore) 8 Musical artist DiFranco 9 Barking pets 10 Doctrine that reality is one organic whole

11 Hamhanded 12 Gen 13 Certain boxing punch 14 Not firmly implanted 15 Preliftoff term 16 Jenna Bush 17 "Kinda" suffix 18 Ballpark fig.

19 Scale notes 24 Lay to rest 28 Skating leap 29 Ice cream flavor, briefly 30 Writer Philip 31 H.G. Wells race 32 Smart (cocky) 33 At an end 35 Fashion inits.

36 Synthpop artist, say 37 Sinister 38 They may be candied 41 Wombs 45 Selfconceit 46 Unruly crowd 47 Social Security fig., e.g.

48 Delhi dress 50 Not only that 51 Vienna loc.

53 Crank (up) 56 upswing 57 Meat stamp letters 58 Wk. day 60 The, in Paris 61 "The Simpsons" store clerk 62 Work at as a dilettante 63 Breathe hard 64 Leave out 65 Intermission 66 Bullfight cry 67 Apt. units

70 Stew veggie 74 Eye covers 75 Bettor's note 76 Tatty clothes 77 Strive (for) 78 U.N.'s Kofi 80 Hubbub 81 Call placer 84 Actor Parsons 85 Corn cover 86 Stew veggie 87 Part of PIN 89 Carve 90 Somber 91 In (as found) 92 Don of radio 93 Last year's frosh 96 "Part II" films 97 Tightly strung 98 Squeak (out) 102 Cereal meal 103 Breaks up 104 Add to the batter, say 106 Charge at 107 School, in Nice 109 Writer Horatio 110 Calf catcher 113 ESPN datum 115 and haw 116 Greek vowel 117 Dreamtime acronym 118 Baby's wear 119 Lyric tribute 120 Wanna (aspirants) 121 Santa (hot wind) 122 Big health supplement chain, familiarly 123 "I see mice!"

37

Boggled How many English words can you find in the Boggled grid, according to the following rules?

• The letters must be adjoining in a ‘chain’. They can be adjacent horizontally, vertically or diagonally.

• Words must contain at least four letters and may include singular and plural or other derived forms.

• No letter may be used more than once within a single word, unless it appears twice.

• No vulgarities or proper nouns are permitted.

TARGET • Average: 21 • Good: 30 • Very good: 43 • Excellent: 55 SCORING 4 letters: 1 point 5 letters: 2 points 6 letters: 3 points 7 letters: 5 points 8 or more letters: 11 points

Nonagram How many English words of four letters or more can you make from the nine letters in our Nonagram puzzle? Each letter may be used only once (unless the letter appears twice). Each word MUST CONTAIN THE CENTRE LETTER (in this case T) and there must be AT LEAST ONE NINE LETTER WORD. Plurals, vulgarities or proper nouns are not allowed.

• Average: 8 • Good: 11 • Very good: 16 • Excellent: 21

38

30th March - 5th April

health Kicking sweet habits SUGAR is in many respects the original health sin, accounting for a quickly growing spectrum of physical and even mental conditions, and quitting the white stuff is notoriously difficult.

There is a smart approach, however, and, like all long journeys, it begins with a series of small steps. First cut out any fizzy, sugary drinks from your diet over the course of a week. That means no coke or lemonade, no matter whether they are ‘diet’, ‘zero’ or whatever else they claim to have you buy the product.

Once you’ve banished the fizz, gradually do the same with the fat-free yoghurt, which is laden with sugar to make up for lost taste; and cereals which you’ll find possibly contain far more sugar per bowl than a can of Vimto.

Other cheeky offenders include snack bars, tinned sauces, white bread, fruit juice, ice cream, and even salad dressing.

Scrutinising shopaholics BETTER SUCCESS: Couples attending private clinics had higher success rates than those using public heallth services.

Half of IVF couples do not realise their dream HALF of the couples who have resorted to assisted reproduction to have a child have not been successful according to a survey by the Spanish Organisation of Consumers and Users (OCU).

The survey, which has been prepared by the OCU from the experience of 1,273 couples aged between 36 and 38 years who started some kind of assisted reproduction, found that half had tried to have a child without success, although the success rate was higher among couples who attended private

COCONUTS are a staple of many Indian, African and South-American cuisines and, despite growing popularity in the west, many of us are missing out on their full potential.

You might have seen coconut milk in the Asian section of the supermarket, or coconut oil and juice in healthfood shops at an eye-watering price, but there’s no need to pay over the odds to enjoy the benefits of this remarkable healthy food.

Even an old hairy coconut in the supermarket is chock full of vitamins, minerals and healthy fats, and it’s an incredibly versatile food that can pack a healthy punch to almost any meal.

Once you crack open the nut, the

clinics compared to those who did it through the public health service.

The survey also highlighted the difference in waiting times between public and private healthcare when attending the first consultation: six months for public health compared with one or two months for private services.

Starting treatment within the public system can also take a year compared to two months within the private system.

The OCU found that the most fre-

quent problems of couples who resort to assisted reproduction is lack of ovulation for women and low sperm count in men.

The OCU also advised couples to see a doctor sooner. If couples have been trying for a baby for more than a year and especially if a woman’s age exceeds 33, specialist advice should be sought as fertility decreases with age and deadlines for diagnosis and subsequent treatment ‘may take quite some time.’

Paradise found water you discover inside is full of electrolytes, making it extremely hydrating and helpful in the summer heat.

To get at the flesh simply take out the inner shell and peel the brown layer off, leaving you with a delicious white ‘meat’ which is filled with plant protein containing 17 out of 20 essential amino acids, iron, folate, potassium, fibre and healthy MCT fats.

If you go a step further and peel the flesh into flakes then dry them, you have all the ingredients you need to make coconut butter.

Simply blend the flakes for 10-15 minutes, adding a little water if necessary.

For coconut milk mix in a little more water.

With the milk, butter, or flakes you have a hearthealthy addition to all sorts of meals, including porridge, pancakes and curries.

PROTEIN PUNCH: Delicious and healthy.

THE university hospital of Bellvitge, L’Hospitalet de Llobregat, near Barcelona, has defined for the first time three new subtypes of shopaholics, a disorder that is still rarely studied.

The finding is the result of several studies that have recently been published by the Unit of Pathological Gambling and Other Behavioural Addictions of the Psychiatry Hospital de Bellvitge. The aim of the study was to provide new insights into compulsive shopping disorder.

Compulsive buying affects between 6 and 7 per cent of the population, but is still a little-studied disorder and reference manuals do not classify it as a specific pathology.

According to Dr Susana Jimenez, head of the unit, there are neurobiological, psychological and social factors involved in compulsive buying.

One of the studies coordinated by Jimenez first identified three subtypes of shopaholics, the first of which consists mostly of men with high levels of gambling and low levels of social reward dependence.

A second subtype mainly consists of educated women, occupationally active without addictive personality traits and the third is predominantly also women but where the onset of the disorder is early, in addition to the presence of other psychiatric disorders and high dysfunctionality problems with school and work.

30th March - 5th April

39

health

Going braless could be better for your health COULD it be time to ditch that wardrobe staple, the bra? Some experts believe that they can cause health problems and lead to droopy breasts.

A woman’s health expert in the UK said they can cause problems ranging from muscle damage and pain in your neck and shoulders, to headaches and even skin conditions.

Several years ago a French university professor who had monitored 300 women aged between 18 and 35 over 15 years, concluded that bras were a ‘false necessity’ as his study found that those avoiding bras developed more muscle tissue in their bust, which provided natural support.

This muscle tissue did not develop when restricted with bra fabric.

The warnings come as fashion choices seem to be making a shift from the plunging, push-up bras, to the more natural, softer look. Retail analysts NPD reported that sales of traditional bras are down 19 per cent as more women choose sports bras

Sweet dreams for happy couples HAPPY couples have happier dreams. That’s the finding from a study which analysed data from almost 350 American couples.

The men and women were quizzed about how well they slept, including whether they woke up during the night, whether they used sleeping pills and if they had trouble staying awake during the day.

Some also wore a device that monitored them for a week, to provide data on how well they actually slept. The couples were asked about how much their partner or spouse cared for them and how appreciated they felt.

Assessing all the data the researchers believe that those who were happier and felt more cared for, had a better night’s sleep.

Ask the optician – ski eye care Amirk Sappal, Store Director from Specsavers Opticas Fuengirola DID you know that the Sierra Nevada ski season has been extended to May 6 because of the quantity of snow? It’s a great time to ski in the Sierra Nevada, but please don’t forget that skiing is tough on your eyes! Here are some FAQ’s about skiing and the eyes to make sure you can enjoy the sun safely this season.

Q. Why are my eyes more at risk when I’m skiing?

A. The skies on the slopes are very clear and the reflection of sunlight on the snow is very strong. These two factors combine to be potentially damaging to the eyes and could lead to long-term effects.

LET LOOSE: And free yourself from the range of problems bras can cause. for ‘comfort and ease of movement’ and last month the parent firm of Victoria’s Secret lingerie brand, reported

that its shares this year were down by 29 per cent as sales of its ‘supersexy’ push-up bras fell.

Q. How does this affect my eyes?

A. Few realise how damaging UV rays can be to the eyes. The UVB rays can irritate the surface of the eye, causing a painful form of sunburn called photokeratitis. You may not even be aware whilst out in the snow, as the effects can take six - 12 hours to develop. Long-term exposure to UVB can cause cataracts and even ocular tumours.

Q. How can I protect my eyes whilst out on the slopes?

A. All you need is good sunglasses, but make sure you choose the right ones. Always read the label carefully and choose the maximum protection factor available. Choosing sunglasses without the right protection could damage the eye by causing the pupil to dilate, increasing the amount of UV light filtering into the eyes, so always keep this in mind when selecting your eyewear.

Specsavers Opticas is currently offering free eye tests. Find your nearest store

40

30th March - 5th April

AIR CONDITIONING AIRFLOW Air conditioning for cooling and heating units. Professional, fully guaranteed installations.

Tel: 952 443 222 (256685) AIR CONDITIONING. Quality installations. Free quotations. All areas covered. EnviroCare, 21 years experience Heating and cooling products. 952 663 141 www.envirocarespain.com (257522) AIR CONDITIONING by Cool and Cosy. The family company that cares.

Installation and repairs.

Quality machines.

EsoSense movement sensor supplied and fitted for 80 euros. Coin meters supplied and fitted from 260 euros. For other energy-saving products, visit www.coolandcosy.es Tel 952 935 513 (248173) ECONOCOOL – Top quality air-conditioning installed from €500. Service, Repairs & Re-Gas from €50. Top Quality Installations. All Areas Covered. Chris – 662 427 396 econocool@hotmail.es (258007)

AIR CONDITIONING

ADVANCED CLEANING ADVANCED CLEANING SERVICES. Professional Carpet, Upholstery Cleaning, 27 Years Experience, Wet/Dry Clean.

Honest, Reliable Service.

678 808 837 / 952 669 701 Or Email acservs@outlook.com (252581)

AIRPORT TRANSFERS TRANSFER AIRPORT COSTA DEL SOL. Personal Chauffeur with Car. +34 648 503 909 (Whatsapp /Viber) (256479)

ANTIQUES WANTED! All types of antiques, paintings, jewellery, watches, silver etc. Any condition.

Immediate cash settlement.

For more information call into Anthony's Antiques and Jewellers shops, extensive premises at C/Ramon y Cajal 40, Fuengirola.

Mobile 609 529 633.

Telephone 952 588 795.

(201522) COLLECTOR buys watches, pocket watches & coins any kind. 651 187 549 (258449)

CAMPER/CARAVANS CAMPER VANS, CARAVANS, MOBILE HOMES, BOATS AND ALL PLANT, DIGGERS, DUMPERS, MOTORBIKE, CARS AND COMMERCIALS WANTED. BEST PRICE PAID CASH TODAY, ANY REGISTRATION WITH OR WITHOUT PAPERS. PLEASE CALL 678 808 837. (252581)

CLEANING SERVICES PROFESSIONAL Carpet And Upholstery Cleaning, 27 Years Experience, Wet/Dry Clean. Honest, Reliable. 678 808 837, 952 669 701, acservs@outlook.com (252581) RUGS FITTED CARPETS, Upholstery Including Leather Cleaned On Site 685 524 921 (252581)

ELECTRICIAN ELECTRICIAN All Areas covered - Richard on 687352358 or email richi@europe.com All instalations & maintanance. Surge Protection, Garden Lights, Upgrades, Boletins.

(256206)

FURNITURE THE WAREHOUSE – We Buy A Single Item To A FULL House Clearance – 602 610 103 Furniture Wanted, Same Day Collection, Also House Clearance And Removals.

602 610 103 (252581)

ANIMALS / PETS

INSURANCE

GARDENING PROFESSIONAL garden services from Fuengirola to Estepona. All aspects of gardening and full maintenance and landscaping, free quotes, competitive prices.

Contact Andrew 600 259 981 Andrew@garden professionals.com (259525) GARDEN & POOL MAINTENANCE – from €120 per month products included, from Benalmadena to Marbella. www.ricardogardens.es RICARDO 637 160 129.

(257682) www.jardin-garden.es All types of garden & pool maintenance. Free estimates. 10 years professional service on the coast. T: 666 953 892. E: benalandrew@yahoo.es (257153)

GATES REPAIRS ELECTRIC GATE / GARAGE DOOR automation repaired. Free, no obligation quotation.

Call Colin - 636 394 641

GLASS CURTAINS GLASS CURTAIN repairs, specialist in replacement of discoloured plastic strips that act as a seal between the glass panels.

Call Julian 655 825 931 (258009)

GOLF LAS BRISAS Golf share.

For Sale or Swap for anything valuable. Offers.

Buy now, pay later.

George 617 333 777.

HOUSE CLEARANCE THE WAREHOUSE – We Buy A Single Item To A Full House Clearance – 602 610 103 (252581)

INTERNET GET YOUR business noticed online! Make sure that expats in Spain can find your product, service, restaurant, bar or shop.

Contact Spain’s newest and brightest online directory TODAY. Call 951 386 161 or email mark.w@ euroweeklynews.com for more details

IRRIGATION INSURANCE MOTOR INSURANCE. For the most competitive quotes in English call Linea Directa on 902 123 153, you could save as much as 30% and you can transfer your existing no claims bonus. Call Linea Directa on 902 123 153 for motor insurance with a human voice in English from Monday to Friday 9am to 6pm and save money now!

F&P-IRRIGATION: professional new sprinkler systems and repairs, 30 years’ experience. 14 days free trial, fixed price. Six Solid Rock Guarantees.

Free quotation. 952 931 558 (258952) F&P PUMPS: pressure and pool pumps, service, sales and repairs Six Solid Rock Guarantees 952 931 558 (258952)

LOCKSMITHS 24/7 LSM INSURANCE. No fat singing blokes or trumpeting telephones, just professional service at the best prices for all your insurance needs including car, household, commercial, life, health and travel.

Tel 952 578 008 or www.lsminsurance.biz for a quotation (257690)

LOCKSMITH EMERGENCY / APPOINTMENT. Doors Opened Without Damage, Locks Changed, Patio Doors And Windows Secured, 24 Hour Honest, Fast And Reliable Service.

Call Paul 657 466 803 (T1) (251072) 24 HOUR LOCKSMITHS - Safe Engineers. 30 Years Experience, Call Daren Or Bob 952 660 233 667 668 673 www.securityofspain.com (240915)

OBITUARY

30th March - 5th April MOBILITY SENIORWORLD MOBILITY scooters, wheelchairs, stairlifts, nursing beds, rise ´n´ recline chairs and a large range of daily living aids for sale or hire. Visit our showroom in Los Boliches - or call on 952 663 131 or 670 964 181 for advice & best prices. (257631) www.Mobility-Spain.com The Mobility Wizards S.L. For all your mobility needs: Repairs, Rentals, Sales and Insurance. Call: 633 127 901/ 622 832 954.

(259038) PREMIER MOBILITY SPAIN – Sale or Hire of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs & Walking Aids. Batteries & Tyres supplied & fitted. All types of repairs carried out i.e.

Stair-lifts, Electric Bikes, Pool Pumps & TV’s. Call 603 263 157/663 956 018 / 951 542 184 (256218)

MOSQUITO SCREENS MOSQUITO NICK NO1 SPECIALIST FOR MOSQUITO SCREENS for all types of windows and doors.

PRICE PROMISE/NEVER BEATEN ON PRICE!!! All types of screens: sliding, pull-down, pleated, fixed and ARCHED available in all colours including wood grain. Call Nick at 647 072 861, www.mosquitonick.ws (257078) (T1)

ACE OF SHADES - Don’t let the bugs get you!

Available in enrollable, slider and pleated. Large choice of colours including wood effect. Tel: 951 273 254 / 671 732 204 / info@aceof shades.de sign (101730)

MOTORING AUTOMATIC gearbox specialist. Transmatic. All models including classic cars, serviced, repaired and reconditioned. Also 4x4 transfer boxes and power steering Call/fax 952 796 166 / 952 805 804 email: transmatic2005 @yahoo.com. www.trans matic.es (258783)

SELLING YOUR SPANISH CAR? PHONE Bill Brady for the best cash price.

Stay safe and phone Bill on 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 billbradycars.com (257838)

SPANISH COURSES

MASSIVE SAVINGS AT BILL BRADY CARS has been established on the Costa del Sol since 1986, in which time he has helped thousands of expatriates to buy or sell their quality used Spanish cars and also keeping all the documentation simple so you understand all that is going on (which is important). You can contact Bill direct on 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 or billbrady cars.com (257838)

SALE PRICE HONDA CIVIC (DIESEL) 1.6 IDTEC. 2015 (Face lift model) One private owner 34’000 Klm (21’000 Mls) Full service history from Honda Marbella and 5year warranty. Leaving Spain hence this fabulous car at new low price of only 13’995€. 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 billbrady cars.com (257838)

SALE PRICE AUTOMATIC 4X4 NISSAN JUKE DIG-T 190 CV 2015 (Special order) 36’000 klm (22’000 mls) bought and serviced

by Nissan. Cost 28’000 €, new to many extras to list see web page massive saving only WAS 17´995€ NOW16’995€. 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 or billbradycars.com (257838)

4X4 VW TOUAREG AUTOMATIC 3.2 Inj. Sept 2003 from private owner 135’000 klm (85’000 mls) Parking camera, DVD, sat navigation, Bluetooth, electric seats with leather. Full specification, only 7’995€ 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 billbradycars.com. (25 7838)

SALE PRICE KIA SPORTAGE (Diesel) 4X2 1.7 CRDI 2013 One private owner 58’000 Klm (36’000 Mls) Not a rental or lease Jeep Metallic gold, parking sensors, alloy wheels and much more great value for money WAS 14’995€ NOW ONLY 13’995€ 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 bill bradycars.com (257838)

HYBRID TOYOTA AURIS Touring Sport Automatic 1.8 inj. 2016 only 4’000 Klm (2’500 Mls) One private owner, used only as holiday car, sat-navigation, parking camera, cruise control, Bluetooth, full electric pack and much more save a fortune at only 17’995€ 952 838 842 / 608 950 221, billbrady cars.com (257838)

IDEAL TOWN OR FIRST CAR SEAT MII 2014 5 Door with only 50'000 Klm (31'000 Klm) From private owner new ITV (MOT) till 2020 drives and looks great. Leaving Spain hence this great offer, well under list price at only 5'995€ 952 838 842 / 608950221 billbradycars.com (257838)

DIESEL RENAULT SCENIC 1.9 DCI 2006 from private owner 133’000 Klm (83’000 Mls) With full service history great MPV. For family or working and its only 3’995€ 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 billbradycars .com (257838)

NEARLY NEW TOYOTA AYGO 2016 5 door one private owner 12’000 Klm (7’000 Mls) full service history and warranty from Toyota save a fortune its only 8’995€. 952 838 842 / 608 950 221 billbrady cars.com (257838)

41

2004 CITROEN C5 2.0 DIESEL automatic new ITV in very good condition throughout, lots of extras including alloys climate control €2,995.

Tel: 695559939.

(252347)

2005 NISSAN PRIMERA new model, 2.2 diesel 6 speed, in excellent condition throughout alloy air con, Sat Nav Spanish car €2,995. Tel: 695559939.

(252347)

CLASSIC CITROEN 2cd 1981 LHD Spanish Car, only 50,000 KLM, Runs and drives, but has been stood for a while and needs a little TLC. Would make a really nice car €2,250 Tel: 695559939.

(252347)

CITROEN XSARA Picasso, 1.6 Hdi, diesel, excellent condition, 100,000km. Right hand drive on Spanish plates, air con, alloy sets, new ITV, great car. €3,450.

Tel: 695559939.

(252347)

42

30th March - 5th April

MOTORING CLASSIC BMW 520 ISE 1982, RHD on Spanish plates, in good condition throughout, drives perfect, been here 22 years, only €995 Tel: 695559939. (252347) 2004 RENAULT KANGO MULTISPACE 1.5 DCI, new ITV and tyres twin side doors, in excellent condition throughout, air con €2,495. Tel: 695559939. (252347)

2003 BMW 328.SE 4 door right hand drive, on Spanish plates. 1 owner from new, Full service History, silver with black leather, Alipina Alloys 3 sets of keys. Must be seen. €2,995 Tel: 695559939. (252347)

NEW SHAPE 2013 OPEL CORSA 1.2, 5 door, 61,000kms. (37,000miles) grey, electric windows locking, air condition, private teacher owner, top of the class condition, 7,250 euros. See photo web page. www.robertsoncarsspain.com SAMANTHA .

952 832 173 / 608 658 785 (259190)

STORAGE

190 E 2.0 Petrol, rare 4 speed manual 1991, Spanish car, in very good condition throughout. These cars are increasing in Value, only €2,995 Tel: 695559939. (252347)

ONLY 2,995 EUROS FORD FUSION 2006. 1.6. 5 DOOR HATCH BACK BIG BOOT ONLY 61,000KMS. ONLY USED AS HOLIDAY CAR, AIR CONDITION, CD PLAYER. CHEAPER THAN RENTING. See photo www.robertsoncarsspain.com SAMANTHA. 952 832 173 / 608 658 785 (259190)

CLASSIC MERCEDES Convertible 1993 SL 300, 5 speed Auto, 24V LHD on English Plates, one previous owner, good condition throughout. Excellent Runner. 90,000 KLM. Hard Top €5,995 Tel: 695559939. (252347)

REDUCED PRICE DIESEL RENAULT MEGANE SCENIC 2007 model 1.9 dci, one pilot owner, 5 door, champagne, ITV til oct.2018 WAS 4,995 NOW 3,995 euros www.robertsoncarsspain.com SAMANTHA 952 832 173/ 608 658 785 (259190)

2007 DIESEL AUTOMATIC Ford Mondeo 2.0 TDCI Ghia, with all extras including climate control. 1 owner from new. 120,000kms, with Ford service history.

Metallic light blue. €4,750.

Tel: 695559939 (252347)

REDUCED PRICE ONLY 23,000 KILOMETERS FORD KA, 2013, tomato red, cd. Lady owner, Immaculate like new, WAS 5,995 NOW 5,750 euros.

See photo www.robert soncars-spain.com SAMANTHA 952 832 173 / 608 658 785 (259190)

LANDROVER DISCOVERY 1998, 2.5 diesel Auto 5 door 7 seater, Air conditioning, Spanish car LHD, in very good condition for its year, new ITV. Excellent Runner €3,750 Tel: 695559939. (252347)

AUTOMATIC / DIESEL AUDI A7 2012 SPORTBACK ONLY 38,000KMS. FSH.SAT NAV, EVERY EXTRA, MONSOON GREY, COST NEW 66,000 EUROS GENUINE BARGAIN LADY OWNER LEAVING SPAIN 28,500 EUROS. SEE PHOTO www.robertsoncarsspain.com SAMANTHA 952 832 173 / 608 658 785 (259190)

TOYOTA HIACE 2007. Pa nel Van 2.4. English plates RHD, In very good condition throughout. Tax and MOT. Ideal for Return Trip €1,995 Tel: 695559939.

(252347) CLASSIC MERCEDES

REMOVALS & STORAGE

MERCEDES ML270, 12/2002, Automatic, 148,000kms, 2 Owners, FSH, Silver, Leather, Sunroof, etc. €6,500 685 318 018 (259315)

FORD FIESTA Van, 2008, immaculate inside & out.

ITV Dec. €2,695 part–ex poss. 687 474 407

2 WHEELED small Smart trailer, excellent condition as new. New Jockey Wheel, Spare Wheel, Brakes, Lights & Ramps.

Cost over £1,000 in the UK. Open to reasonable offers. 660 559 481 / martinsim11@gmail.com

DACIA SANNDERO 2010 1.5 diesel white, 202,000kms all extras €3,750 including transfer 634 029 878 (276250)

AUTOMATIC HONDA CRV, Sun Roof, Air-Con. Immaculate condition. €3,295 or Possible PartEx. 687 474 407 (245069)

REMOVALS & STORAGE

MOTORING WANTED CARS, VANS, ANY REGISTRATION, INSTANT CASH, FINANCE / EMBARGO UK OR SPANISH 685 524 921.

(252581)

CARS, VANS UK OR SPANISH BOUGHT FOR CASH. FREE COLLECTION IN SPAIN/UK. PLEASE CALL 678 808 837 OR 952 669 701. (252581) WANTED CARS AND VANS, FREE COLLECTION, SAME DAY 685 524 921. (252581) CAR, VANS BOUGHT WITH/WITHOUT PAPERS. CASH WAITING 678 808 837. (252581)

CAMPER VANS, CARAVANS, MOBILE HOMES, BOATS AND ALL PLANT, DIGGERS, DUMPERS, MOTORBIKE, CARS AND COMMERCIALS WANTED. BEST PRICE PAID CASH TODAY, ANY REGISTRATION WITH OR WITHOUT PAPERS. PLEASE CALL 678 808 837.

(252581)

PETS ACE CHARITY “El Refugio” in La Cala de Mijas is a registered charity. We have on average 275 dogs in our care and we receive no help from the Town Hall or the Andalucian government. We desperately need foster homes and adoptants for our many dogs, especially the small ones and puppies who do not do well in a big shelter. We are grateful for any help offered, including donations of food and blankets. Visiting times are from 13.00 to 15.00 and you can always turn up or make an appointment by calling Denise on 669 018 736. Our website is www.ace-charity. org where you can view all the dogs in our care. (93320) ADANA THE ANIMAL SHELTER IN ESTEPONA. We always need volunteers to walk and socialise with our dogs and help with cleaning.

We also need good homes for our animals that you can see on www.adana.es. Kennels open every day 10-1.30, Camino de Casares, near Parque de los Pedregales, Estepona. (5 minutes from the Poligono) For more information call 952 113 467, available from 10.00am until 14.00pm. (93319) EURODOG Boarding Kennels & Cattery. Under new ownership by animal loving family. Large kennels and exercise yards, fully licensed and sanitary approved. Safe, secure and caring environment.

Inspections welcome anyt ime. 5 minutes from Fuengirola 679 786 669 / 952 464 947 / www.eu rodog.es (242538) PETCARE PET HOTEL. Alhaurin el Grande. Holiday accommodation for dogs and cats. Heated/Air conditioned kennels available. Tel: 952 112 284 / 685 400 216 www.petcare spain.com.

Find us on Facebook at Pet care Spain. (248877)

30th March - 5th April LAGUNA KENNELS AND CATTERY. Your pets lovingly cared for by English mother and daughter. Near Coin. lagunakennels@hot mail.com. Tel 952 112 021 606 838 983. (257625)

PLUMBERS

www.moveit-storeit.com Tel david 696 810 618 (252306)

PROPERTY WANTED

SEMI-RETIRED PLUMBER will undertake small installations & repairs. Mijas Costa. 691 117 090 (258023)

PET TRANSPORT ACCOMPANY your pets to their new home. Fully licensed pet transport service. Denise www.petchauf feur.eu 952 197 187 / 696 233 848 info@petchauf feur.eu (258752)

SELLING UP?? Why not give us a call and let us give you an honest and realistic valuation of your property.

List with us and let us take the stress out of selling your home. No sale no fee!! English agent on the ball with clients waiting. Please, call 685 524 921. (252581)

REMOVAL SERVICES 15 CUBIC metre van returning to the UK 30th March. Space available each way. Tel. 639 928 090

SITUATIONS VACANT

EUROPE SPECIALIST. Combitrans Movers. 952 775 300 www.combitrans.es (257093) USA SPECIALIST Combitrans Movers. 952 775 300 www.combitrans.es (257093) LOCAL and INTERNATIONAL SPECIALIST. Combitrans Movers. 952 775 300 www.combitrans.es (257093)

PROFESSIONAL LOCAL REMOVALS AT AFFORDABLE RATES. 1/2 DAY FROM €90. FULL DAY FROM €175. WE ALSO PROVIDE A FORTNIGHTLY DOOR TO DOOR SERVICE TO UK AND EUROPE (INCL SCOTLAND).

WORLDWIDE SHIPPING TO USA, AUSTRALIA, ETC AND FULL STORAGE FACILITIES. TEL (0034) 952 578 507 OR (0034) 637 892 278 / EMAIL garymoveit@yahoo.co.uk LOCAL & International Removals Regular Schedules 952 816 582 move@freinternational. com (257824)

REMOVALS/STORAGE www.moveit-storeit.com Tel David 696 810 618 MOVE IT MASTERS UKSPAIN-UK. Over 30 years experience. Guaranteed lowest prices. Storage & kenneling available. Tel or WhatsApp: 660 030 107

HIGH TOP VAN going from Spain to UK and return.

Reliable Service. Call Graham 620 353 594 for details. E-Mail vgcasacolor@gmail.com (260556) MAN & LARGE VAN, 100% reliable, Removals, Clearances. Ikea collection & assembly. 20€ per hour.

Tel: 622 020 856 (246758)

43

STORAGE Marbella Dry Secure 952 816 582 move@freinternational. com (257824) STORAGE lowest price guaranteed. Packaging materials Self-Storage Marbella 952 811 311 (242608) www.moveit-storeit.com Tel David 696 810 618 (259517)

BIG VAN (removals) always on time. 100% reliable. 25€ PH – 633 277 270 (260539) 2 MEN, Van €30 p hour.

Also House Clearances. 651 081 610 (257683) www.moveit-storeit.com Tel David 696 810 618 REMOVALS MAN AND VAN / house clearances.

Ikea & Leroy Merlin Runs 20€ per hour 609 321 958.

HANDYMAN & VAN – Small removals, clearances. Ikea collection & assembly.

Experienced & reliable. €20 hourly – 603 257 612 (256478)

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44

30th March - 5th April

SITUATIONS VACANT RECEPTIONIST required for immediate start in Fuengirola. Native English and advanced Spanish.

Must have good telephone manner and be computer literate. Full time contract for successful applicant.

Send CV to recruitment@euroweeklyn ews.com

SOFT FURNISHINGS CURTAINS, BLINDS, CUSHIONS AND MUCH MORE. Free Estimates And Home Visits. Tel 657 369 343 Or rosannacarmella@hotmail. com (252512)

SOLAR BLINDS SOLAR BLINDS ES Ideal For Large Glazed Areas To Reflect Heat / Glare And Stop Furniture Fading And Still Keep The View. Save Heat In The Winter Too Improve Your Living Environment. ian@solarshadetinting. com Tel Ian 958 496 571 / 644 546 176 (251071)

SWIMMING POOLS POOL MAINTENANCE, repairs, friendly, reliable service. Estepona, Malaga, inland re-grouts, heaters.

678 791 495 / 951 295 699 www.sparklenrip ple.net (250331)

www.perfectpools.es Maintenance, Repairs & Renovation. Professional & Reliable Service. All Areas. info@per fectpools.es. 650 348 785

WESTARPOOLS. Pool construction, renovation, repairs and heating.

619 246 372 / www.westarpools.com

POOL HEATERS, covers and rollers. EnviroCare.

952 663 141. www.enviro carespain.com (257522) Justpools.es 8x4m pool 90€ inc. 10x5m pool 100€ inc. Re-grout 8x4 500€ inc Full liability insurance. 952 472 476 / 619 636 586 (258615)

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FUENGIROLA New, young, pretty and slim.

Horny Kisser. Massage, Complete 603 171 298 (276283) FUENGIROLA Mother and daughter. Playful, horny and fun. Kisses & Massages 672 159 565 (276283)

TUITION MARBELLA DESIGN ACADEMY – Validated programs.

UK Bachelor of Arts Degrees in Interior architecture, Graphic design & Fashion design. www.designschool.com

TV & SATELLITE REPAIRS – TV’s, Plasmas, LCD’s, Digi – Boxes, Video, Hi-Fi and microwaves. Free estimates, can collect. 35 Years experience. John 952 491 723 or 600 706 201

MATURE ELEGANT LADY. Voluptuous Bust. All Services. Only Hotel And Home Visits. 687 387 680 (259505) BENALMADENA, LAURA, Independent Beauty, Young And Slim, Good Service, Fluent English, Incalls / Outcalls. 633 744 422 (251283)

UPHOLSTERY RUGS FITTED CARPETS, Upholstery Including Leather Cleaned On Site 685 524 921 (252581) ADVANCED CLEANING SERVICES. Professional Carpet, Upholstery Cleaning, 27 Years Experience, Wet/Dry Clean.

Honest, Reliable Service 678 808 837 / 952 669 701 Or Email acservs@outlook.com

FUENGIROLA Delicious French Girl, mulatta, chubby pert ass. Multi-orgasmic, Complete. 697 928 954 (276283)

BEAUTIFUL slim, model, tantra massage. Safe & clean place. English speaker. www.annatantra.com 633 060 678. (256212) VIAGRA, cialis, kamagra all areas. Delivery available 604 385 476. viagra4you19@gmail.com (276249)

XXX RELAX MALE ATTRACTIVE BOY, Super Endowed. Perfect lover, that will make you enjoy sex. 603 202 758 (258492)

XXX RELAX SHEMALE MARBELLA Shemale Karina 27, beautiful blonde, Brazilian, feminine. Endowed.

Whatsapp 667 846 464 (259186)

30th March - 5th April

45

sport

Sotogrande lad picked for Andalucia because of his speed, agility, ferocious tackling and a very good understanding of the game.

The Sub 14 Andalucian National team will compete for the Spanish Championships which will be held on April 14 and 15 this year in Puertollano, Ciudad Real.

There are 2 groups: Group A - composed of Cataluña, Valencia and Madrid Group B - composed of Andalucia, Castilla y Leon, Galicia and Asturias.

The winners of the two groups will meet in the final on April 15.

Hot prospect Davidovich makes progress THE promising youngsters of world tennis set the first round of the Casino Admiral Trophy alight in Marbella.

Taking place at the Puente Romano Tennis Club, the tournament will run until Saturday but it has not been overly kind to Spanish players.

While Alejandro Davidovich and Roberto Carballes won their matches, Adrian Menendez, Tommy Robredo and Marcel Granollers are all out, among others.

Davidovich, just 18 years old and Wimbledon Junior Champion in 2017, triumphed over Slovak Norbert Gombos 6-3 6-3.

However, fortune was not with tournament and Marbella ambassador Adrian Menendez, as the fourth seed was defeated by Martin Klizan of Slovakia 6-3, 6-4.

In other selected results, 24-year-old Belgian Kimmer Coppejans triumphed over Argentine Pedro Cachin 4-6, 6-0, 6-4, while Austrian youngster Sebastian Ofner (21) beat Spanish veteran Tommy Robredo 6-4, 6-1.

SPIKE PARSONS: With the ball.

Malaga Champion of Champions competition Credit: Jenny and Garry Aldridge

Credit: Facebook, Alejandro Davidovich Fokina Twitter

VICTORY ROAR: Alejandro Davidovich carries Spain’s hopes in Marbella.

Credit: Ade Parsons

SPIKE PARSONS has been playing rugby since Guy Leleu started training at Rugby Tots in Estepona at the age of four years old.

Now, 13 years old he has been bitten by the rugby bug. He plays scrum half and captains the Sub 14 team of Club Rugby del Estrecho in Guadiaro.

This season he has lead his team to their very first league championship beating the likes of Marbella, Jerez and Portuense along the way, no mean feat since the rugby club was only formed eight years ago.

Spike has been chosen for the Andalucian Sub 14 team

by Sue Walker THE Champion of Champions competition was held this week at Santa Maria Bowls Club to find the Malaga Province Lady and Gents Champions.

Nine men and seven ladies battled against each other trying to reach 21 shots first.

Most games were closely contested and 22 games were won by only one shot.

J e ff R o w e f r o m L a Posada was extremely unlucky and failed to win on three occasions by one shot, but Dave Wilson from Mijas and Pauline Ball from Don Pablo won two games each by just one shot.

The potential champions were never clear until the last day when Bill Davies from Benavista, Dave Wilson from Mijas and Garry Aldridge from Santa Maria had to secure victories.

Garry beat Graham Jarrett from Lauro in the morning and Dave Wil-

WINNERS: Val Thornton and Garry Aldridge.

son in the afternoon to be crowned the Men’s Champion of Champions.

Val Thornton from Mi-

jas had to beat Hazel Guttridge from Benavista in the morning to be in contention for the title against Joyce Whitt

from Santa Maria, who had won all her games.

In the last game Joyce went ahead by 14 shots to four but then Val scored on the next six ends to level the game. Tense play continued up to 19 -19, t h e n Va l s e c u r e d t w o shots to win 21 - 19 and take the ladies title.

The spectators enjoyed fantastic bowling and good weather, apart from the wind, and Ron Jones, the Malaga Province Delgado, thanked everyone for attending, Susan Walker and her team for organising, all the markers and umpires who did a fantastic job.

He then presented every player with their medal and a gold medal and the trophy to the Ladies Champion Val Thornton and to Garry Aldridge the Men’s Champion.

Anyone interested in bowling can contact www.bowlinginspain.co m for their nearest bowls club or for information on bowling in Spain.

46

30th March - 5th April

motoring

Audi A7 delivers on design and detail SINCE its arrival in 2010, the Audi A7 has been doing good business for the German brand.

It was the Mercedes CLS that started the trend for four-door coupes back in 2004, and it’s a style that has since been adopted not only by Audi but also BMW. Underneath the sleek skin and frameless windows of Audi’s latest contender is what is effectively the new A6, which made its debut at the recent Geneva Motor Show.

Its styling is the work of design boss Marc Lichte, this being the second car he’s had full control of since arriving at Audi from Volkswagen in 2014.

The new model is shorter and narrower than previous iterations, while sitting on a wheelbase that has been stretched by 12 mm.

The upshot design-wise is shorter overhangs front and rear, which helps with proportions, plus an interior that has grown in

length by 21 mm.

Space inside is generous, with enough headroom and legroom for four tall adults to feel comfortable, despite the sloping roofline.

The dashboard design is refreshingly simple, with horizontal lines, flawless materials and fit, and a notable absence of buttons.

Switch on the ignition however, and things spring into life, with three digital screens to contend with.

Audi’s now familiar 12.3 inch Virtual Cockpit gives a digital representation of the instruments, but can also be fully configured via simple steering wheel controls to display the satnav map, trip computer and infotainment functions.

The menu logic is faultless, which in turn means the whole set up is far less distracting to use on the move than the similar sys-

A-LISTER: Audi have built a reputation for elegant reliability.

tem in the Range Rover Velar.

The three-litre V6 engine features electrical assistance in the form of a 48V mild hybrid system, consisting of a lithium-ion battery in the boot, which powers a small electric motor housed between the engine and gearbox.

This allows the car to coast with

cpthe engine off between 34 mph and 99 mph to save fuel and in terms of the battery, there’s no need to plug in.

Energy is instead recuperated when the brakes are applied or the car is coasting which, com-

bined with a more capable stop-start system, is said to improve fuel consumption by about 10 per cent.

The cruise control works with the GPS to automatically slow the car for bends, and can use a forward-facing camera to read road signs and adapt its speed to the current limit.

This is a predictably polished product with style and power, while bursting with technological treasures.